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Downloaded from
YTS.LT

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[Professor X the Overseer]
<i>This is protected by the red,</i>

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.LT

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<i>the black, and the green
at the crossroad with a key.</i>

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<i>♪ Roar the lions ♪</i>

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{\an8}[audience applauding, cheering]

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{\an8}[Dave] <i>I was a soft kid.</i>

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I was sensitive, I'd cry easy,
and I would be scared to fist-fight.

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And my mother used to tell me this thing,
I don't know if you remember,

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but you said this to me more than once.

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You said, "Son,
sometimes you have to be a lion

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so you can be the lamb you really are."

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I talk this shit like a lion.

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["Mapogo Lions" by Ras Kass playing]

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<i>♪ Come king, try and bask
Claw slash, lion sword ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Bring war to your front door
Till we no see you no more ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Kill or be killed is a skill
What we learn and master ♪</i>

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{\an8}<i>♪ Annihilate and decimate
Like a natural disaster ♪</i>

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<i>♪ No doubt we've calmed the beast
I warned you about ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Bloody rain and thunder
Roar if we catching a drought ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Mapogo lions on the concrete plain ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Niggas running from our shadows
'Cause we all spit flames ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Lion heart we share upon
Why Babylon can't breathe ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Why we a village
They village with every step we take ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Mapogo looks so deceptive
But my cause is perfected ♪</i>

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<i>♪ A smile in your face
Then turn round and dissect it ♪</i>

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<i>♪ From the fear and disrespect ♪</i>

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<i>♪ The smoke hit different
When your screen is cigarettes ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Big Ben, Queen Elizabeth
Get your rep up ♪</i>

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{\an8}- [applauding, cheering]
<i>- ♪ I stepped up for the ones you ate ♪</i>

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{\an8}<i>♪ For then multiplied in snake form
Wait for 'em ♪</i>

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{\an8}<i>♪ We in hell boy, breathe 'em ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Treason I believe in
How the jungle work ♪</i>

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<i>♪ In order for you to live
You need young to murk ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Tear through the ACL
The kidneys, organs, they all choose ♪</i>

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<i>♪ You can keep the ruby chains
I don't like y'all jewels ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Wrapped around my neck
Squeezed tight, I bleed life ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Scream light in this bitch
I've seen lightning get thick ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Brain storm, it got heavy
My vision never cloudy ♪</i>

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<i>♪ The form stay right, nigga howdy... ♪</i>

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Yo, thank you.

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[song fades]

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[audience applauding, cheering]

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[Dave] Thank you very much.

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Please, everyone, have a seat.

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Be comfortable.

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[audience applauding, cheering]

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We got a lot to talk about.

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Now, I gotta tell you, I gotta tell you
how this show came to be.

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You guys know I live in Ohio.

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[audience cheering]

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In January,
when this nigga, Trump and Elon...

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[audience laughing]

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...made this DOGE thing,
and cut all those government jobs,

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the housing market
in my hometown plunged 20%

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in the first quarter.
And I don't mean to talk like a white...

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[audience laughing]

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...but, boy, they did that, didn't they?

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And then when this nigga deployed
the National Guard in my hometown

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and took the police department
from the mayor,

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oh, D.C. niggas, we don't like that.

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[audience cheering, applauding]

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But then my governor in Ohio
sent our National Guard

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to police my hometown.

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And I called these niggas and said,
"I'm pulling up."

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[audience applauding, cheering]

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Because these niggas is trying to take
the chocolate out of Chocolate City.

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[audience applauding, cheering]

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I said, "I gotta go home
while it's still the city I remember."

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And then I went on Instagram
and saw all the protests in D.C.

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There was a bunch of white people like,
"Not on our streets!"

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I said, "Oh, no, it's too late."

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- [audience laughing]
- [chuckles]

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These whites are entrenched.
"Not on our goddamn streets, you don't."

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[audience applauding]

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This nigga Trump was talking
like he goes out to dinner.

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It's not like that.

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Yeah, and I gotta tell you the truth.

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This is not the only city
this is happening in.

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It's happening in California,
it's happening in Oregon,

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it's happening in Illinois,
and it's happening in Memphis.

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And-- and niggas in Memphis,
they might need it.

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[audience laughing]

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You got to be reasonable. I don't know
if you've been in Memphis recently,

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but them niggas already stole two tanks
from the National Guard,

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so you already know.

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- [audience laughing]
- [Dave chuckling]

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You already know, you know.

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And I came here mad, ready to fight,
but when I drove through the city,

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it looked clean, guys. I got to tell you.
I got to tell you, it looked clean.

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[audience laughing]

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A lot better
than the last time I was here.

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Today I only saw one guy
take a shit on the street.

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But you know what? He had a bag.
That nigga picked it up.

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[audience laughing]

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I was waiting for somebody to do something
about the homeless.

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You know what's fucked up about D.C.?

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We the nation's capital and nobody even
gives a fuck about the homeless.

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I'm gonna tell you the truth.
I feel like I'm the only one that does.

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Now, y'all don't know this,
but quietly for the last two years,

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I have been secretly working
with Washington's homeless,

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and I have spent two million dollars
already on my homeless project.

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[audience applauding, cheering]

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[Dave chuckling]

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No, no, no, don't clap for me.

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I didn't give 'em food
or anything like that.

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I just taught these niggas
the "Thriller" dance.

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[audience laughing]

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And you got a big treat coming up
on Halloween, you'll see.

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[audience laughing]

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And I'm sorry I didn't come home sooner,
but I've been very busy in Ohio.

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And a lot of people say,
"What are you doing out there?"

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And I don't know if you know this,
but this is true.

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I'll tell you what I've been doing.
The town that I've been living in

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for the last 25 years,

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I bought most of it.

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[audience laughing]

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I like it there.

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Ohio loves Trump,
but this town I live in is like

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a little itty-bitty Bernie Sanders Island
in the Trump Sea.

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All the whites are poor out there,
but these are like

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the dirty hippie whites, and I like them.

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I like these whites.

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And they like me too.

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But you know what I learned
about liberal white people?

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Liberal white people let Black people
do whatever fuck they want

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until you buy most of their town.

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[audience laughing]

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Oh, they frowned on that.

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Them whites got real suspicious,
but you know what?

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I don't blame them.

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Because-- No, for real,
because look, if I was white

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and the people in this town were Black,
you know what they'd say?

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They would say I was gentrifying the town.

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But there's no word
for what I'm doing to these people.

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[audience laughing]

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I own everything, nigga, everything.

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I used to be mad
at white people when I was young

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because I thought they were unfair.

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But now that I have all this property,
I understand them. It's fun.

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Feels good to walk up to white people
like, "Are you supposed to be here?"

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[audience laughing]

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"Calling the police." It's fun.

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I own so much property in this town,
and this is true,

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these white people think
I'm responsible for their well-being.

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That's ridiculous.
Nigga, I'm not no public servant.

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I'm a capitalist.

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I be walking down the street
minding my own business,

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and they come up to me
with their concerns. "Dave!"

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"Congratulations on buying
the whole goddamn town."

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"But you need to start thinking about
some affordable housing around here."

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And I'll be like, "Well, actually,
champ, I can afford my house."

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[audience laughing]

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"That sounds like some shit you need
to worry about."

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"Because if I think about it,
I can afford your house too."

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"So if you want to sell,
come holler at your boy."

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"I'm collecting the whole town."

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"I'm collecting the whole goddamn town."

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[audience applauding, cheering]

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You know, I don't know where
these poor whites got the money.

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But not long ago,

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these motherfuckers built
a brand-new fire station out of the blue.

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Where the fuck they get this money from?
I was like, "What the fuck is this?"

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And then you know what they did?
They-- This is some real racist shit.

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They tried to sell the old fire station

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at an auction when they knew
I was gonna be out of town.

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[audience laughing]

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It's fucked up.

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But it's far too late for that.

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I got that whole town
rigged with snitches.

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Them niggas couldn't wait to tell me.

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They was running up.
"My lord, my lord, I have news, my lord!"

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I was like, "What's going on?"

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"What is this you say? A firehouse?"

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Nigga, I bought the firehouse.

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I turned that motherfucker
into a comedy and music club.

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We be rocking in there. Clipse been there.
We all be out there rocking.

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[audience cheering, applauding]

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Every famous person I've ever met,
I asked them to play that club.

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I seen Mick Jagger
from the Rolling Stones at a party.

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I sat down and said, "Yo, Mick."

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I said, "Mick, you gotta come
to Ohio and play in my club."

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And he was into it.

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[imitating Mick Jagger]
He was like, "All right."

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He said, "All right,
I like playing clubs."

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[audience laughing]

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He said, "But tell me about the town."

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[in normal voice] I said,
"Well, what do you want to know?"

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And that nigga looked at me like-- like,
you know, the Mick Jagger look.

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He said...

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[imitating Mick Jagger]
"...Are there girls there?"

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[audience laughing]

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[chuckles]

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[in normal voice]
I-- I lied right in his face.

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I was like, "Yeah."

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[audience laughing]

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He knew something was wrong. He's like...

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[imitating Mick Jagger] "...No, no, no."

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"Come on, Dave. You know,
like the kind of girls that I like."

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[in normal voice] I said, "Mick,
I-- I don't know-- I don't--

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I don't know what kind of girls you like."
Then he said...

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[imitating Mick Jagger] "...You know."

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"You've heard my music."

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"Are there white bitches with dirty feet?"

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- [audience laughing]
- [chuckles]

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[in normal voice] I said, "Mick,
you are going to love this place."

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[audience laughing]

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"Mick, these bitches will put
a ring around a public pool."

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[audience laughing]

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Dirty hippie pussy,
that's what I'm dealing with.

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[audience laughing]

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I'm not a drug guy at all, right?

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But-- But I am in show business,
you know what I mean?

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So, I've been to every kind of party.
Now-- Now, I'm gonna be honest with you,

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I smoke weed,
but I don't consider weed a drug.

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[audience applauding, cheering]

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But you know how show business is.

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I've been to cocaine parties,
I've been to weed parties,

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I've been to all the parties,
and I'm just telling you the truth

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of what I've seen.

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Coke bitches are way prettier
than weed bitches are.

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[audience laughing]

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I be looking at weed bitches like,

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"Damn, bitch,
did you sleep in those clothes?"

225
00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:32,251
"The fuck's going on with you?"

226
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No energy in the face.

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They don't wear their bra all the time
so their titties be sagging.

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[drawling] "Get your dick
out of my face, man."

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[in normal voice]
That's how a weed girl sounds.

230
00:12:46,224 --> 00:12:48,893
[drawling]
"I'm not gonna suck your cock, man."

231
00:12:50,144 --> 00:12:52,562
"My mouth is dry as a bone."

232
00:12:52,563 --> 00:12:55,691
- [audience laughing]
- [chuckles]

233
00:12:55,692 --> 00:12:57,150
[in normal voice]
You ever get some weed head?

234
00:12:57,151 --> 00:12:58,444
Feels gross, doesn't it?

235
00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:03,825
Feels like a cat sucking your dick.
Like, what kind of...

236
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:06,785
How do you not have any moisture
in your mouth?

237
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:09,246
Bitch, go wet your whistle
and try again, would you?

238
00:13:09,247 --> 00:13:10,623
Go drink some water.

239
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:13,042
Yuck.

240
00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:15,877
Yuck.

241
00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:18,881
[audience laughing]

242
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:26,222
Recently in the news...

243
00:13:28,182 --> 00:13:30,518
I've been getting a lot of grief, again...

244
00:13:33,021 --> 00:13:36,815
because I did a comedy festival
in Saudi Arabia.

245
00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:41,069
[audience applauding, cheering]

246
00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:44,948
And you hear those cheers,
that's Black people.

247
00:13:44,949 --> 00:13:47,410
[audience laughing]

248
00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:51,748
America's whites, they're furious.

249
00:13:52,874 --> 00:13:53,999
Boy, I gotta tell you something,

250
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,209
I've never not felt guilty
about something.

251
00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:58,421
Like, I've never felt-- I don't feel...

252
00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:01,965
I don't feel-- I don't feel guilty at all.

253
00:14:01,966 --> 00:14:04,176
[audience cheering]

254
00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:07,095
You know, and-- and Bill Maher,
the famous comedian,

255
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:09,765
I've known Bill
since I was, like, 18, 19 years old,

256
00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:12,601
and I've never said this publicly,
but fuck that guy.

257
00:14:12,602 --> 00:14:15,062
[audience laughing]

258
00:14:15,063 --> 00:14:18,940
I'm so fucking tired of his little smug,
cracker-ass commentary.

259
00:14:18,941 --> 00:14:21,526
[audience applauding, cheering]

260
00:14:21,527 --> 00:14:25,989
These motherfuckers act like because I did
a comedy festival in Saudi Arabia,

261
00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:27,866
I somehow betrayed my principles.

262
00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:30,660
- [woman] You didn't!
- Well-- No, no, I know I didn't, I know.

263
00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:32,829
- No, no, no.
- [audience members shouting indistinctly]

264
00:14:32,830 --> 00:14:35,290
No, let me--
Come on, everybody, let me do this.

265
00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:37,709
[audience laughing]

266
00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,628
- And I'm sure-- No.
- [man shouting indistinctly]

267
00:14:39,629 --> 00:14:41,505
All right, now everybody calm down.

268
00:14:41,506 --> 00:14:42,964
[audience laughing]

269
00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:44,384
No, I'm sure I'm right.

270
00:14:45,051 --> 00:14:46,843
First of all, what-- what did they say?

271
00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:49,596
They said-- They said, "Well--"
They said, "Well--"

272
00:14:49,597 --> 00:14:52,516
They said, "Well, Saudi Arabia
killed a journalist."

273
00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:55,352
And rest in peace, Jamal Khashoggi.

274
00:14:55,353 --> 00:14:58,271
I'm sorry that he got murdered
in such a heinous fashion.

275
00:14:58,272 --> 00:15:00,066
- But...
- [audience applauding]

276
00:15:00,608 --> 00:15:02,734
And no "buts," like, you know, period.

277
00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:04,277
And also...

278
00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:06,613
[audience laughing]

279
00:15:06,614 --> 00:15:07,949
I mean, look, bro,

280
00:15:08,950 --> 00:15:12,911
- Israel's killed 240 journalists...
- [audience cheering, applauding]

281
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:14,621
...in the last three months.

282
00:15:14,622 --> 00:15:16,957
So, I didn't know
y'all was still counting.

283
00:15:16,958 --> 00:15:21,461
[audience applauding, cheering]

284
00:15:21,462 --> 00:15:25,757
These niggas clowned me
because I was on stage in Saudi Arabia.

285
00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:28,343
I didn't tell them to put this
in the paper. I just said it on stage.

286
00:15:28,344 --> 00:15:32,431
I said, "It's easier to talk
in Saudi Arabia for me

287
00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:34,182
than it-- than it is in America."

288
00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:36,518
And-- And niggas felt some kind of way.

289
00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:39,855
[audience applauding]

290
00:15:39,856 --> 00:15:44,276
Oh, I stand ten toes on that.
Don't forget what I just went through.

291
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:48,363
Two years ago, I almost got canceled
right here in the United States

292
00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:51,325
for transgender jokes.
But I gotta tell you something.

293
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:56,371
Transgender jokes went over very well
in Saudi Arabia.

294
00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:59,500
[audience laughing]

295
00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:01,752
[chuckles]

296
00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:04,337
Them niggas couldn't get enough
of that shit.

297
00:16:04,338 --> 00:16:07,716
I was in the pocket, nigga.
I was like, "Where have you been?"

298
00:16:07,717 --> 00:16:11,429
[audience applauding, laughing]

299
00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:19,437
[chuckles]

300
00:16:21,772 --> 00:16:25,609
Every article said that comedians
whored themselves out to a dictator.

301
00:16:25,610 --> 00:16:28,528
But-- But all the articles
have my picture on it.

302
00:16:28,529 --> 00:16:32,532
And you know what? I can't even get mad.
'Cause, you know, to be fair,

303
00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:35,160
I did make more money
than all of those comedians.

304
00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:38,080
- [audience laughing]
- [chuckles]

305
00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:41,333
I don't even work
at Netflix no more, nigga.

306
00:16:41,334 --> 00:16:42,792
You know what my new job is?

307
00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:45,086
I sit by the phone
and wait for them Arabs to call me.

308
00:16:45,087 --> 00:16:47,964
"Can I help you guys? What do you need?"

309
00:16:47,965 --> 00:16:51,135
[audience applauding, laughing]

310
00:16:54,305 --> 00:16:56,015
I love working in the Middle East.

311
00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:58,643
That's my second show I did over there.

312
00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:03,021
I did a show three months before that.
That was in Abu Dhabi.

313
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:06,149
Them niggas had a-- a--
a comedy festival too.

314
00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:08,527
And let me tell you something.
Now, y'all never been in the Middle East.

315
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,862
Here's some wild shit
about them you might not know.

316
00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:13,490
You know how everybody got, like,
a dog around here?

317
00:17:13,491 --> 00:17:15,200
Out there, they don't fuck with dogs.

318
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:19,162
You know what they do? They got--
They got birds, falcons, nigga.

319
00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:21,958
These niggas have as pets,
they have falcons.

320
00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:26,253
I couldn't believe it. I went to the mall,
I saw these niggas with falcons.

321
00:17:26,254 --> 00:17:27,754
I'm like, "This shit is dope."

322
00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:32,050
And, you know, here in D.C.,
we might see, like, a pimp here or there.

323
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:34,177
- And that's...
- [audience laughing]

324
00:17:34,178 --> 00:17:36,012
But I've never seen a nigga pimp a bird.

325
00:17:36,013 --> 00:17:38,265
That nigga just had the bird like,
"Bring me a rabbit."

326
00:17:38,266 --> 00:17:41,059
And that motherfucking bird
would just bring this nigga a rabbit.

327
00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:44,272
And he'd just give the bird a piece
and eat the rest himself.

328
00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:47,732
So, I saw a guy at the mall
with one of these falcons.

329
00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:50,777
We were just talking about bullshit.
And I don't know what--

330
00:17:50,778 --> 00:17:52,445
I don't know why
I even thought to do this.

331
00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:54,364
Something just came over me.
I said-- I said, "Yo--"

332
00:17:54,365 --> 00:17:56,491
I said, "Yo, nigga,
let me borrow that falcon."

333
00:17:56,492 --> 00:17:59,036
[audience laughing]

334
00:17:59,954 --> 00:18:00,955
He did it.

335
00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:03,873
He gave me the mitten,
and he gave me the falcon.

336
00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:06,960
Now, I've done a lot of fly shit
in my life,

337
00:18:06,961 --> 00:18:09,296
but the most rock star shit
I've ever done,

338
00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:10,630
you'd never know what this feels like.

339
00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:13,800
I walked into an arena this size,
20,000 people screaming.

340
00:18:13,801 --> 00:18:16,886
I had a live falcon on my arm.
Niggas went crazy.

341
00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:20,265
[audience cheering]

342
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:22,684
Crowd was going nuts.
This is their national bird.

343
00:18:22,685 --> 00:18:24,937
Now, I don't know shit about the bird.

344
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:26,606
Turns out,

345
00:18:27,398 --> 00:18:32,902
this species of falcon that was on my arm
is the single fastest creature on earth.

346
00:18:32,903 --> 00:18:34,154
I didn't know that.

347
00:18:34,155 --> 00:18:36,489
[audience chuckling]

348
00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:39,744
Apparently when it hunts,
it flies straight up

349
00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:43,496
and then it dives down
at 240 miles an hour,

350
00:18:43,497 --> 00:18:44,623
they've clocked it at.

351
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:47,917
It strikes its prey dead
and then flies off and comes back,

352
00:18:47,918 --> 00:18:50,504
and gets whatever it killed.
I didn't know that.

353
00:18:51,422 --> 00:18:54,090
And when I was walking through the arena,
the crowd was screaming,

354
00:18:54,091 --> 00:18:57,552
but the falcon didn't panic,
'cause it had some kind of mask on,

355
00:18:57,553 --> 00:18:59,638
and that nigga was just looking like...

356
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:02,015
[audience laughing]

357
00:19:02,016 --> 00:19:03,225
But it didn't trip.

358
00:19:03,934 --> 00:19:08,396
Now, I didn't know, this mask
is part of the falcon's training.

359
00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:12,485
If you take the mask off the falcon,
it will think that it's time to hunt.

360
00:19:13,444 --> 00:19:15,153
Boy, I wish he'd told me that.

361
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:18,323
[audience laughing]

362
00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:19,866
'Cause I was on the stage killing it,

363
00:19:19,867 --> 00:19:21,701
and the falcon
was just looking all stupid like this.

364
00:19:21,702 --> 00:19:24,371
And I'm like, "Oh, man,
this nigga can't even see the show."

365
00:19:24,372 --> 00:19:26,164
So, I took the mask off.

366
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:29,210
[audience laughing]

367
00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:34,214
Man, this falcon lost his goddamn mind.
Mayhem ensued.

368
00:19:34,215 --> 00:19:36,591
That motherfucker fluttered like this
and flew off my arm.

369
00:19:36,592 --> 00:19:38,885
And at first,
everybody was clapping, "Yeah!"

370
00:19:38,886 --> 00:19:43,556
And that nigga dove down,
240 miles an hour.

371
00:19:43,557 --> 00:19:45,642
Killed a bitch in the third row.

372
00:19:45,643 --> 00:19:47,811
[audience laughing]

373
00:19:47,812 --> 00:19:50,730
And it was a transgender bitch.
When it hit her, her dick popped out.

374
00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:53,775
[audience laughing]

375
00:19:53,776 --> 00:19:56,070
Everybody screamed.
I was like, "Oh, shit."

376
00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:00,574
I didn't know what to do.

377
00:20:02,284 --> 00:20:05,329
Next thing I know, the police,
the Arab police came

378
00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:07,831
and these niggas
just ushered me off stage.

379
00:20:07,832 --> 00:20:11,669
I didn't realize that I was under arrest.
I said, "What's the meaning of this?"

380
00:20:13,587 --> 00:20:16,423
Clearly, these guys know
it was an accident.

381
00:20:16,424 --> 00:20:20,845
And the next thing I know,
they charged me with murder.

382
00:20:21,679 --> 00:20:23,180
I said, "Murder?"

383
00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:25,808
The fuck? It was an accident.

384
00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:29,394
And then they had me in a court,

385
00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:33,189
and these niggas started reading
transcripts of all my transgender jokes.

386
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:35,024
[audience laughing]

387
00:20:35,025 --> 00:20:37,235
Trying to act like
I killed this bitch on purpose.

388
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:39,070
I said, "I didn't even know
this bitch was trans

389
00:20:39,071 --> 00:20:40,531
until her dick popped out."

390
00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:43,033
"This is a goddamn outrage."

391
00:20:43,993 --> 00:20:45,243
"I'm an American."

392
00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:47,705
[audience laughing]

393
00:20:53,169 --> 00:20:55,628
I still didn't think I was gonna get
in trouble, but at the end of the case,

394
00:20:55,629 --> 00:20:57,464
this is the only word
in the whole trial I understood.

395
00:20:57,465 --> 00:21:00,593
That nigga said, "Guilty." I said, "What?"

396
00:21:01,761 --> 00:21:07,057
And my whole life flashed before my eyes.
I said, "I wish I never came out here."

397
00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:11,479
You're probably wondering
how I'm here tonight.

398
00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:14,898
Well, I didn't know this at the time,
but I found out,

399
00:21:14,899 --> 00:21:18,735
lucky for me, killing a transgender
in the Middle East, misdemeanor.

400
00:21:18,736 --> 00:21:21,363
[audience laughing]

401
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:28,120
Phew!

402
00:21:30,331 --> 00:21:32,625
Yeah, it's way easier to talk...

403
00:21:34,794 --> 00:21:36,253
in Saudi Arabia.

404
00:21:41,592 --> 00:21:43,260
Jimmy Kimmel got canceled.

405
00:21:45,179 --> 00:21:48,681
Let me tell you something too.
Not only did they cancel Jimmy Kimmel,

406
00:21:48,682 --> 00:21:54,020
this guy Carr that runs the FCC
had the nerve to say that Kimmel,

407
00:21:54,021 --> 00:21:57,816
if he wanted to get back on television--
I don't know if Carr said this,

408
00:21:57,817 --> 00:22:01,194
but somebody said this.
They said this nigga has to pay

409
00:22:01,195 --> 00:22:04,781
Charlie Kirk's
Turning Point USA Foundation money

410
00:22:04,782 --> 00:22:05,782
to get back on.

411
00:22:05,783 --> 00:22:07,867
Now, think about that. No, think about it.

412
00:22:07,868 --> 00:22:13,832
Elon Musk bought the election for Trump
because the Supreme Court said

413
00:22:13,833 --> 00:22:16,961
that money was free speech.

414
00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:21,673
So, you can spend your money
however you want to speak,

415
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:26,970
but if they make this nigga pay some money
for some shit he doesn't believe in,

416
00:22:26,971 --> 00:22:32,852
well then they're compelling him
to say something that he does not mean.

417
00:22:33,435 --> 00:22:36,355
[audience applauding, cheering]

418
00:22:39,316 --> 00:22:41,944
And six million-- Oh, excuse me.

419
00:22:43,153 --> 00:22:44,989
[audience chuckles]

420
00:22:45,990 --> 00:22:48,951
Listen, I made a lot of money.

421
00:22:50,953 --> 00:22:54,330
But I'll take money
from Saudi Arabia any day,

422
00:22:54,331 --> 00:22:59,086
just so I can say no over here.
It feels good to be free.

423
00:23:00,963 --> 00:23:03,381
And I know that the people in Saudi Arabia

424
00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:05,633
can't say all the things
that I was allowed to say.

425
00:23:05,634 --> 00:23:09,346
But a deal's a deal, and the king said
that I could say these things.

426
00:23:10,931 --> 00:23:13,851
So, I looked at it
like I was on a diplomatic mission.

427
00:23:14,643 --> 00:23:17,021
I gotta bring pussy jokes
to the Middle East.

428
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:21,609
'Cause they got all that pussy over there
and they can't even talk about it.

429
00:23:22,276 --> 00:23:23,568
I said, "I'll do it."

430
00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:26,363
[audience laughing]

431
00:23:29,867 --> 00:23:31,911
Shit ain't what it used to be, is it?

432
00:23:33,329 --> 00:23:35,371
This nigga Puff got 50 months.

433
00:23:35,372 --> 00:23:37,833
[audience chuckling]

434
00:23:39,752 --> 00:23:42,212
[audience laughing]

435
00:23:44,256 --> 00:23:46,507
I don't like talking about this,
but I'm gonna do it.

436
00:23:46,508 --> 00:23:50,763
[audience laughing, cheering]

437
00:23:52,973 --> 00:23:58,312
Here's my thing about Puffy,
and I gotta state my bias.

438
00:24:01,649 --> 00:24:04,860
Years ago, I got attacked on stage...

439
00:24:06,737 --> 00:24:09,489
in-- in California at the Hollywood Bowl.

440
00:24:09,490 --> 00:24:10,949
Now, this was a long time ago.

441
00:24:10,950 --> 00:24:14,202
At this time,
Charlie Kirk was alive and well.

442
00:24:14,203 --> 00:24:17,331
[audience laughing]

443
00:24:19,375 --> 00:24:22,877
This is another reason it's hard to talk
in America, 'cause, you know,

444
00:24:22,878 --> 00:24:26,047
if you talk for a living and see
Charlie Kirk get murdered that way,

445
00:24:26,048 --> 00:24:29,092
I'm gonna be honest, nigga, I was shook.

446
00:24:29,093 --> 00:24:30,718
[audience laughing]

447
00:24:30,719 --> 00:24:34,305
I mean, Charlie Kirk
is the wholesome white guy,

448
00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:37,726
and they killed this motherfucker.
I said, "These whites..."

449
00:24:38,227 --> 00:24:40,813
[audience laughing]

450
00:24:42,940 --> 00:24:44,692
"You've never seen them like this."

451
00:24:46,318 --> 00:24:47,820
"They're playing for keeps."

452
00:24:49,196 --> 00:24:51,364
And then remember,
the next day in the news,

453
00:24:51,365 --> 00:24:55,326
when all the information was still shoddy,
they came out and they were like,

454
00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:59,038
"Apparently there were
transgender messages inscribed

455
00:24:59,039 --> 00:25:02,250
on the bullets."
I was at home like, "Oh, no!"

456
00:25:02,251 --> 00:25:04,627
[audience laughing]

457
00:25:04,628 --> 00:25:06,422
"I'm dead as fried chicken!"

458
00:25:11,427 --> 00:25:14,095
[chuckles]

459
00:25:14,096 --> 00:25:17,307
And then weeks later
they said what was written on the bullets.

460
00:25:18,142 --> 00:25:19,308
One of the bullets had

461
00:25:19,309 --> 00:25:22,604
<i>"Bella Ciao, Bella Ciao,
Bella, Bella, Bella Ciao"</i> written on it.

462
00:25:23,772 --> 00:25:27,316
Another bullet had written on it,
"If you're reading this, you're gay."

463
00:25:27,317 --> 00:25:30,029
[audience laughing]

464
00:25:31,155 --> 00:25:33,322
I was at home like, "Nigga, I'm gonna need
to see these bullets."

465
00:25:33,323 --> 00:25:37,326
How the fuck is this nigga writing
whole paragraphs on bullets?

466
00:25:37,327 --> 00:25:40,788
How big are these bullets?
What is this nigga, a watchmaker?

467
00:25:40,789 --> 00:25:42,957
He can inscribe all this shit on a bullet?

468
00:25:42,958 --> 00:25:45,085
[audience chuckling]

469
00:25:47,755 --> 00:25:49,631
[audience member shouts indistinctly]

470
00:25:50,424 --> 00:25:52,885
I'm not making light
of Charlie Kirk dying,

471
00:25:53,385 --> 00:25:55,261
but I'm not sure what it means,

472
00:25:55,262 --> 00:25:57,221
and I'm not sure I believe
what they say it means.

473
00:25:57,222 --> 00:26:00,266
I'll tell you what I don't believe,
and the whites were quick to say this.

474
00:26:00,267 --> 00:26:04,187
They said, "Charlie Kirk
is this generation's Martin Luther King."

475
00:26:04,188 --> 00:26:06,022
[audience booing]

476
00:26:06,023 --> 00:26:09,276
[singsongy] No, he's not.

477
00:26:10,611 --> 00:26:11,778
[chuckles]

478
00:26:11,779 --> 00:26:14,490
Yeah, that's a-- that's a reach.

479
00:26:14,990 --> 00:26:16,741
[audience laughing]

480
00:26:16,742 --> 00:26:19,035
You know, they both got murdered
in a terrible fashion.

481
00:26:19,036 --> 00:26:20,995
They both got shot in the neck,

482
00:26:20,996 --> 00:26:23,373
but that's about
where those similarities end.

483
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:27,961
'Cause Charlie Kirk is a motherfucking...

484
00:26:29,505 --> 00:26:32,423
internet personality. No, by design.

485
00:26:32,424 --> 00:26:34,926
Fundamentally,
he can't function like Dr. King.

486
00:26:34,927 --> 00:26:38,888
Internet niggas are negative
because they have to be.

487
00:26:38,889 --> 00:26:40,848
'Cause nobody will engage them

488
00:26:40,849 --> 00:26:43,560
unless they say shit
that makes them upset.

489
00:26:44,061 --> 00:26:46,020
That's Charlie Kirk.

490
00:26:46,021 --> 00:26:47,271
[audience applauding]

491
00:26:47,272 --> 00:26:50,358
Could you imagine Dr. King
was behaving like Charlie Kirk?

492
00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:53,319
[imitating Martin Luther King Jr.]
"Smash that like button and subscribe."

493
00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:55,113
[audience laughing]

494
00:26:55,114 --> 00:26:58,408
"Follow me for more content like this."

495
00:27:00,577 --> 00:27:04,373
"I believe all Black people
should be free. Change my mind."

496
00:27:12,089 --> 00:27:14,216
[in normal voice]
The Congress took a vote...

497
00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:18,261
that October 14th
would be Charlie Kirk Remembrance Day,

498
00:27:18,262 --> 00:27:20,179
and everybody voted for it.

499
00:27:20,180 --> 00:27:21,556
[audience booing]

500
00:27:21,557 --> 00:27:26,894
No, no, no, I'm not going to boo it.
You can reme-- Hey, hey, hey, no, no.

501
00:27:26,895 --> 00:27:28,688
Remember that nigga if you want to.

502
00:27:28,689 --> 00:27:29,856
[audience laughing]

503
00:27:29,857 --> 00:27:32,234
And remember him however you want to.

504
00:27:32,734 --> 00:27:36,445
But I do know that most of those
congresspeople voted for that

505
00:27:36,446 --> 00:27:38,614
'cause they're afraid
of political violence.

506
00:27:38,615 --> 00:27:42,244
I'm telling you,
it's easier to talk in Saudi Arabia.

507
00:27:42,744 --> 00:27:45,664
[audience laughing]

508
00:27:50,043 --> 00:27:53,588
I was on stage not long ago in the States
and niggas got mad 'cause I said,

509
00:27:53,589 --> 00:27:56,299
"Well, you know, maybe Puff will get off."
And I said, "I hope so."

510
00:27:56,300 --> 00:27:58,051
And the crowd was like, "Boo."

511
00:27:58,886 --> 00:28:01,387
Okay, look,
it's not that I think Puff is right,

512
00:28:01,388 --> 00:28:04,891
but when I got attacked
in L.A. at the Hollywood Bowl,

513
00:28:04,892 --> 00:28:09,563
people forget Puff was the guy
that tackled my attacker.

514
00:28:10,564 --> 00:28:12,149
He saved my life.

515
00:28:12,983 --> 00:28:15,402
That's a hard nigga
to be mad at after that.

516
00:28:16,486 --> 00:28:18,988
I had security that night,
but you know what I mean?

517
00:28:18,989 --> 00:28:20,656
Them niggas-- They just wasn't ready.

518
00:28:20,657 --> 00:28:22,742
Them niggas had some
slippery shoes on or something.

519
00:28:22,743 --> 00:28:25,495
They ran out.
All them niggas slipped and fell.

520
00:28:26,538 --> 00:28:29,082
And Puffy got my attacker and tackled him.

521
00:28:29,625 --> 00:28:31,834
And then years later,
when I heard about that baby oil,

522
00:28:31,835 --> 00:28:34,879
I was like,
"What did those niggas slip on?"

523
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:37,382
[audience laughing]

524
00:28:46,183 --> 00:28:48,393
A thousand bottles of baby oil,
that's a lot.

525
00:28:50,103 --> 00:28:54,482
Remember, he wasn't on trial
for having a thousand bottles of baby oil

526
00:28:54,483 --> 00:28:58,861
because it's not a crime
to have a thousand bottles of baby oil.

527
00:28:58,862 --> 00:29:00,279
It's gross.

528
00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:02,740
[audience laughing]

529
00:29:02,741 --> 00:29:04,076
It's not illegal.

530
00:29:06,286 --> 00:29:10,165
And I'm going to tell you something else
I haven't said... but this is true.

531
00:29:10,874 --> 00:29:13,877
In L.A. one night...
I shouldn't even tell-- Fuck it.

532
00:29:15,671 --> 00:29:17,296
I've been to Puffy's house.

533
00:29:17,297 --> 00:29:20,592
[audience exclaiming]

534
00:29:22,344 --> 00:29:26,389
No, I didn't see-- Look, no, I didn't see
none of the stuff they said in that trial.

535
00:29:26,390 --> 00:29:30,476
I walked through that nigga's living room,
house was clean, traction on the floor,

536
00:29:30,477 --> 00:29:32,270
nothing slippery, walked right through.

537
00:29:32,271 --> 00:29:34,231
[audience laughing]

538
00:29:35,148 --> 00:29:36,817
Perfectly normal evening.

539
00:29:37,734 --> 00:29:39,194
The only thing...

540
00:29:40,195 --> 00:29:41,737
the only thing, in hindsight,

541
00:29:41,738 --> 00:29:44,241
but at the time
it didn't mean nothing to me...

542
00:29:44,741 --> 00:29:46,867
I didn't think about it
until after I found all that stuff out.

543
00:29:46,868 --> 00:29:50,121
But in hindsight, it was fucked up,
but we was on his back patio,

544
00:29:50,122 --> 00:29:52,164
and we was drinking and laughing, talking,

545
00:29:52,165 --> 00:29:56,002
and then Puff starts swirling
his drink like this, and he goes...

546
00:29:56,003 --> 00:29:57,795
[audience laughing]

547
00:29:57,796 --> 00:29:59,755
He goes, "So, Dave."

548
00:29:59,756 --> 00:30:01,800
[audience laughing]

549
00:30:03,260 --> 00:30:06,554
He goes, "What are you into?"

550
00:30:06,555 --> 00:30:09,348
[audience laughing]

551
00:30:09,349 --> 00:30:10,683
You know me, I didn't-- I was like,

552
00:30:10,684 --> 00:30:13,436
"I don't know, nigga,
books, video games, um..."

553
00:30:13,437 --> 00:30:15,604
[audience laughing]

554
00:30:15,605 --> 00:30:16,857
[chuckles]

555
00:30:19,609 --> 00:30:22,236
I didn't know
that was my big chance to fuck Cassie.

556
00:30:22,237 --> 00:30:24,781
[audience laughing]

557
00:30:31,580 --> 00:30:32,748
God bless her.

558
00:30:35,334 --> 00:30:38,002
I'm not making light of her.
What she went through was terrible.

559
00:30:38,003 --> 00:30:41,213
But remember-- But remember,
'cause they kept showing this video of him

560
00:30:41,214 --> 00:30:44,217
beating her up in a hotel hallway.
It was a terrible video.

561
00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:47,262
Uh, but he wasn't on trial for that.

562
00:30:47,846 --> 00:30:52,558
If you remember, he paid her for that
before the federal charges ever came up.

563
00:30:52,559 --> 00:30:55,394
He paid her 35 million dollars,
is what I heard.

564
00:30:55,395 --> 00:30:57,521
Which doesn't make it right,
but I mean, come on, nigga.

565
00:30:57,522 --> 00:31:01,025
I do know niggas that have fought
Floyd Mayweather for less money than that.

566
00:31:01,026 --> 00:31:03,069
[audience laughing]

567
00:31:03,070 --> 00:31:05,405
And them niggas had to fight
for 36 minutes.

568
00:31:13,914 --> 00:31:15,457
But Cassie is a gangster.

569
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:19,710
She did something
that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

570
00:31:19,711 --> 00:31:23,839
She had to testify about her sex life.
Boy, that's tough.

571
00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:25,509
God save us all from that.

572
00:31:27,344 --> 00:31:30,638
Anything you say
about sex publicly is gonna sound bad.

573
00:31:30,639 --> 00:31:33,182
Even if you're talking
about fucking your wife face-to-face.

574
00:31:33,183 --> 00:31:35,351
The judge is like,
"Tell me about when you..."

575
00:31:35,352 --> 00:31:37,437
"Did you fuck your wife face-to-face?"

576
00:31:38,563 --> 00:31:40,981
"Yes, Your Honor, I did."
"Well, could you describe the..."

577
00:31:40,982 --> 00:31:44,985
"Well, yes, I looked at her
in her cold, bored eyes, and then I..."

578
00:31:44,986 --> 00:31:46,695
[audience laughing]

579
00:31:46,696 --> 00:31:51,242
"Then I pulled those big panties aside,
and it's like a bush that just screams,

580
00:31:51,243 --> 00:31:53,369
'I don't give a fuck,' and I just--
You know what I mean?"

581
00:31:53,370 --> 00:31:55,329
"Just powered through it,
you know what I mean?"

582
00:31:55,330 --> 00:31:57,874
[audience chuckling]

583
00:32:04,881 --> 00:32:06,590
Cassie had to do way harder than that.

584
00:32:06,591 --> 00:32:09,427
Them questions-- They was like,
they was asking her all kinds...

585
00:32:09,428 --> 00:32:13,598
"Did Sean Combs pee in your mouth?"

586
00:32:14,516 --> 00:32:17,018
I was like, "Oh my God."
She didn't hesitate.

587
00:32:18,228 --> 00:32:20,229
[gargling] "Yes, Your Honor,
he did. He peed--"

588
00:32:20,230 --> 00:32:22,566
- [chuckles]
- [audience laughing]

589
00:32:23,567 --> 00:32:24,651
I'm sorry.

590
00:32:44,087 --> 00:32:45,171
Tonight, I had done something,

591
00:32:45,172 --> 00:32:47,673
I had, like, prepared something
that I wanted to try.

592
00:32:47,674 --> 00:32:49,968
It was hard though, but I really wanted...

593
00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:52,678
[woman] Whoo!

594
00:32:52,679 --> 00:32:57,851
It's the longest closer
in the history of my career.

595
00:32:59,227 --> 00:33:02,271
I'm gonna do it, but, boy,
this is gonna take a lot of focus,

596
00:33:02,272 --> 00:33:05,233
so please don't yell out
and distract me, just enjoy it.

597
00:33:06,568 --> 00:33:10,530
No, it's hard, you know, like--
Look, man, closing the show...

598
00:33:11,531 --> 00:33:14,783
closing the show is everything,

599
00:33:14,784 --> 00:33:17,119
and closing the show in D.C.
is very important.

600
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:19,622
So tonight,
I'm gonna do two different closers.

601
00:33:19,623 --> 00:33:22,417
[audience cheering]

602
00:33:26,796 --> 00:33:30,132
I'll do my closer for D.C.,
and then after that...

603
00:33:30,133 --> 00:33:32,135
[alarm sounds]

604
00:33:33,845 --> 00:33:36,181
- [audience cheers]
- [chuckles]

605
00:33:37,557 --> 00:33:40,059
This bitch scream like a car alarm,
did you hear that?

606
00:33:40,060 --> 00:33:41,435
Did everybody else hear that?

607
00:33:41,436 --> 00:33:43,772
[audience laughing]

608
00:33:44,397 --> 00:33:45,565
Jesus Christ.

609
00:33:46,608 --> 00:33:49,068
All right, and then after that,
if I can get to it,

610
00:33:49,069 --> 00:33:51,195
I'll do my closer from Saudi Arabia.

611
00:33:51,196 --> 00:33:54,449
[audience cheering]

612
00:33:57,494 --> 00:33:59,370
All right, this is the tough one.

613
00:33:59,371 --> 00:34:01,706
Hey, do me a favor, production,

614
00:34:02,457 --> 00:34:04,918
sex it up, give me,
like, comedy club lights.

615
00:34:05,460 --> 00:34:08,755
[audience cheering]

616
00:34:19,182 --> 00:34:21,559
- [man 1] We love you, Dave!
- I love you too.

617
00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:24,813
[audience cheering]

618
00:34:31,403 --> 00:34:33,320
All right, let me concentrate. This is--

619
00:34:33,321 --> 00:34:36,115
When you see it, you'll understand
this is harder than it--

620
00:34:36,116 --> 00:34:37,950
It's harder to do this than you think.

621
00:34:37,951 --> 00:34:40,619
[audience members shouting indistinctly]

622
00:34:40,620 --> 00:34:44,039
Hold on. Go ahead, keep screaming.
Give me a drink.

623
00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:46,793
[audience cheering]

624
00:34:52,465 --> 00:34:55,135
- [man 1] I love you, Dave!
- I love you too, homie.

625
00:34:56,761 --> 00:34:59,264
Listen, I say this...

626
00:35:00,724 --> 00:35:03,935
hoping that this brings somebody
in this audience peace.

627
00:35:04,644 --> 00:35:08,440
I really do mean what I'm about to say.

628
00:35:09,399 --> 00:35:11,609
- [man 2] I love you.
- I know how it is right now.

629
00:35:11,610 --> 00:35:14,778
- [indistinct chatter over walkie-talkie]
- I understand how a lot of people feel.

630
00:35:14,779 --> 00:35:16,322
Turn your walkie down, champ.

631
00:35:16,323 --> 00:35:18,824
[audience chuckling]

632
00:35:18,825 --> 00:35:19,909
[chuckles]

633
00:35:20,994 --> 00:35:23,537
I know how a lot of you guys
are feeling right now.

634
00:35:23,538 --> 00:35:24,788
You can't hear me?

635
00:35:24,789 --> 00:35:27,124
[audience shouting indistinctly]

636
00:35:27,125 --> 00:35:28,375
Can you hear me?

637
00:35:28,376 --> 00:35:31,421
[audience cheering]

638
00:35:33,089 --> 00:35:34,341
[smacks lips, exhales]

639
00:35:35,425 --> 00:35:36,759
Got that Bill Cosby.

640
00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:38,761
[audience laughing]

641
00:35:38,762 --> 00:35:40,597
It's not gonna give me much time.

642
00:35:47,979 --> 00:35:51,857
I know how people are feeling right now,
and I hope that this brings you peace.

643
00:35:51,858 --> 00:35:53,401
I feel that way too.

644
00:35:54,277 --> 00:35:59,156
Without question,
1,000% without question,

645
00:35:59,157 --> 00:36:02,243
all of us, individually and collectively,

646
00:36:03,078 --> 00:36:07,457
are living through some sort
of a conspiracy, I'm sure.

647
00:36:08,416 --> 00:36:11,752
That feeling you have that something
is wrong, or you might feel like,

648
00:36:11,753 --> 00:36:15,006
"Hey, am I right about this?
Am I crazy?" No, nigga.

649
00:36:15,882 --> 00:36:17,384
No, you're not crazy.

650
00:36:18,176 --> 00:36:19,552
This thing you're feeling,

651
00:36:20,136 --> 00:36:23,556
I'm telling you, I feel it too.

652
00:36:24,724 --> 00:36:27,143
But here's what I suggest.

653
00:36:28,978 --> 00:36:35,068
If you don't know what the conspiracy is,
then just say that.

654
00:36:35,819 --> 00:36:37,945
"I don't know" is an acceptable answer.

655
00:36:37,946 --> 00:36:43,034
In fact, if you don't know,
it is the best answer.

656
00:36:43,910 --> 00:36:47,913
But all this fucking guessing out loud
about what the conspiracy is,

657
00:36:47,914 --> 00:36:51,208
I'm begging you,
please, shut the fuck up.

658
00:36:51,209 --> 00:36:53,627
[audience cheering]

659
00:36:53,628 --> 00:36:55,880
You're gonna make everybody sick that way.

660
00:36:57,257 --> 00:37:00,884
You can say "I feel,"
you can say "I think" or "I suspect,"

661
00:37:00,885 --> 00:37:05,639
or, "It looks to me like," but please,
please stop saying you know.

662
00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:07,182
Because in times like this,

663
00:37:07,183 --> 00:37:10,144
the last person I trust
is the nigga that's sure.

664
00:37:10,145 --> 00:37:13,731
This is madness.

665
00:37:13,732 --> 00:37:17,652
[audience applauding, cheering]

666
00:37:22,407 --> 00:37:23,825
But here's what I think.

667
00:37:26,119 --> 00:37:28,204
Somehow this country went wrong...

668
00:37:30,331 --> 00:37:31,875
in 1910.

669
00:37:32,417 --> 00:37:34,627
[audience laughing]

670
00:37:35,628 --> 00:37:40,091
I-- I narrowed it down to a specific dude.

671
00:37:41,885 --> 00:37:47,182
It has-- It has something to do...
And think about what I say later, not now.

672
00:37:49,768 --> 00:37:53,480
It has something to do with Jack Johnson.

673
00:37:54,189 --> 00:37:57,192
- [audience murmuring]
- [man] Whoo!

674
00:37:58,526 --> 00:37:59,861
Jack Johnson...

675
00:38:00,987 --> 00:38:05,033
was the first Black
heavyweight champion of the world.

676
00:38:06,117 --> 00:38:08,953
And the heavyweight championship
to this day

677
00:38:09,621 --> 00:38:12,749
is the most prestigious title in sports.

678
00:38:14,584 --> 00:38:16,127
But in 1908...

679
00:38:17,504 --> 00:38:20,339
only white fighters had that distinction.

680
00:38:20,340 --> 00:38:23,091
Not because Black fighters
weren't good enough,

681
00:38:23,092 --> 00:38:29,389
but because no white fighter would give
any Black person the opportunity

682
00:38:29,390 --> 00:38:31,100
to lay their hands on them.

683
00:38:32,769 --> 00:38:37,147
And a guy named Tommy Burns
became heavyweight champion.

684
00:38:37,148 --> 00:38:40,859
And Tommy Burns was an anomaly.
He was Canadian.

685
00:38:40,860 --> 00:38:43,904
And he said, "I am
the heavyweight champion of the world."

686
00:38:43,905 --> 00:38:47,241
He's Canadian. You know how,
you know, faggy they are. He was like...

687
00:38:47,242 --> 00:38:50,078
[audience laughing]

688
00:38:51,913 --> 00:38:56,542
He said, "I am not the champion of Canada,
I am not the champion of white men."

689
00:38:56,543 --> 00:38:58,585
"I am the heavyweight champion
of the world,

690
00:38:58,586 --> 00:39:02,339
and I will defend my championship
against all comers."

691
00:39:02,340 --> 00:39:03,675
And boy...

692
00:39:05,051 --> 00:39:08,929
Jack Johnson got the opportunity to fight

693
00:39:08,930 --> 00:39:11,640
for the heavyweight championship
of the world

694
00:39:11,641 --> 00:39:15,644
not from an American, like he was,
but from a Canadian.

695
00:39:15,645 --> 00:39:20,649
Now, you think that Americans would root
for Jack Johnson

696
00:39:20,650 --> 00:39:22,526
because he was an American.

697
00:39:22,527 --> 00:39:26,196
No, this nigga was blacker
than Wesley Snipes.

698
00:39:26,197 --> 00:39:29,157
[audience laughing]

699
00:39:29,158 --> 00:39:32,119
Tommy Burns was
at that time the shortest person

700
00:39:32,120 --> 00:39:34,079
to ever be heavyweight champion
of the world.

701
00:39:34,080 --> 00:39:37,583
And Jack Johnson stepped
in the ring and towered above him.

702
00:39:37,584 --> 00:39:40,252
And-- And-- And--
And, you know, he beat his--

703
00:39:40,253 --> 00:39:42,505
He beat the fuck out of Tommy Burns.

704
00:39:43,089 --> 00:39:44,464
In Sydney, Australia.

705
00:39:44,465 --> 00:39:48,427
And all the white fighters in America
were like, "You see what we mean?"

706
00:39:48,428 --> 00:39:51,598
"Fighting those goddamn
dirty fighting monkeys."

707
00:39:54,642 --> 00:39:57,311
Before Tommy Burns,
the heavyweight champion had retired.

708
00:39:57,312 --> 00:39:58,770
It was a man named Jim Jeffries.

709
00:39:58,771 --> 00:40:01,356
And everyone said,
"Jack Johnson's not the real champion."

710
00:40:01,357 --> 00:40:03,275
They said, "Jim Jeffries
is the real champion,

711
00:40:03,276 --> 00:40:05,110
and it's a good thing he's not fighting,

712
00:40:05,111 --> 00:40:07,529
or he'd beat your Black ass,
Jack Johnson."

713
00:40:07,530 --> 00:40:09,073
So, Jack Johnson...

714
00:40:10,992 --> 00:40:13,620
Jack Johnson called out Jim Jeffries.

715
00:40:14,287 --> 00:40:17,706
It happened first in London.
Jim Jeffries was in a parade in London,

716
00:40:17,707 --> 00:40:20,709
and Jack Johnson's Black ass
stepped out of the crowd.

717
00:40:20,710 --> 00:40:24,129
This nigga was dressed to the nines.
He was very articulate.

718
00:40:24,130 --> 00:40:28,801
He said, "I say, old boy,
I sure would like to give you a wallop."

719
00:40:30,595 --> 00:40:33,639
Jim Jeffries was just looking at him.
"What the fuck?"

720
00:40:33,640 --> 00:40:36,808
And then Jim Jeffries was
in a parade in Sydney, Australia,

721
00:40:36,809 --> 00:40:39,186
and Jack Johnson stepped
out of the crowd again.

722
00:40:39,187 --> 00:40:43,691
"I say, old boy, I sure do want
to give you the old one, two."

723
00:40:44,984 --> 00:40:48,904
Jim Jeffries was looking like,
"How does this nigga have a passport?"

724
00:40:48,905 --> 00:40:51,741
[audience laughing]

725
00:40:56,454 --> 00:40:58,247
Again, this was 1910.

726
00:40:59,874 --> 00:41:03,544
The hallmark of Jack Johnson's character
was audacity.

727
00:41:04,545 --> 00:41:06,964
There's a story
about him that's a legend that says

728
00:41:06,965 --> 00:41:10,592
that one night he was caught
speeding down a country road

729
00:41:10,593 --> 00:41:12,470
south of the Mason-Dixon line,

730
00:41:13,388 --> 00:41:15,847
and the police pulled
Jack Johnson's Black ass over.

731
00:41:15,848 --> 00:41:17,015
You know, this was 1910.

732
00:41:17,016 --> 00:41:19,601
He must have been flying,
13, 14 miles an hour.

733
00:41:19,602 --> 00:41:22,271
[audience laughing]

734
00:41:26,401 --> 00:41:27,777
The police stopped him.

735
00:41:29,070 --> 00:41:30,196
The police said,

736
00:41:31,030 --> 00:41:35,909
"It cost 200 dollars for a nigger
to speed on our roads down here."

737
00:41:35,910 --> 00:41:39,121
Back then, 200 dollars was like
getting a 50,000-dollar ticket.

738
00:41:39,122 --> 00:41:40,831
This nigga Jack Johnson didn't hesitate.

739
00:41:40,832 --> 00:41:43,500
He gave him 400 dollars and said,
"I'm coming back this way."

740
00:41:43,501 --> 00:41:46,337
[audience laughing]

741
00:41:49,465 --> 00:41:52,385
After months of persistence...

742
00:41:53,386 --> 00:41:54,929
Jim Jeffries relented.

743
00:41:56,347 --> 00:42:00,267
And Jack Johnson defended his title
against Jim Jeffries

744
00:42:00,268 --> 00:42:01,643
on the Fourth of July.

745
00:42:01,644 --> 00:42:05,063
This is where the phrase
"The Great White Hope" came from.

746
00:42:05,064 --> 00:42:10,569
They were dying to find any white man
that could put this nigga in his place.

747
00:42:10,570 --> 00:42:15,407
I'll tell you what, on the Fourth of July,
Jim Jeffries was not the guy.

748
00:42:15,408 --> 00:42:16,533
[audience laughing]

749
00:42:16,534 --> 00:42:18,619
Jack Johnson fucked his ass up.

750
00:42:19,495 --> 00:42:24,249
And Jack Johnson did what they call
in boxing, "Carried the fight,"

751
00:42:24,250 --> 00:42:27,044
which means he could have
knocked him out in the early rounds,

752
00:42:27,045 --> 00:42:30,213
but he didn't wanna die.
He wanted to make it look good.

753
00:42:30,214 --> 00:42:33,091
But when he got sick of it,
'cause back then it wasn't no, like,

754
00:42:33,092 --> 00:42:36,511
15-round fights, niggas just fought
till they couldn't fight anymore.

755
00:42:36,512 --> 00:42:38,931
And when Jack Johnson got bored...
[pops tongue]

756
00:42:40,099 --> 00:42:41,892
...put him away
with a vicious right hook,

757
00:42:41,893 --> 00:42:44,561
and you see Jim Jefferies
in the footage start to fall,

758
00:42:44,562 --> 00:42:47,482
but then the film cuts off.

759
00:42:48,900 --> 00:42:50,735
'Cause they didn't want any imagery...

760
00:42:51,402 --> 00:42:53,488
of this nigga knocking out their hope.

761
00:42:54,614 --> 00:42:58,325
And on July 5th,
all over the United States,

762
00:42:58,326 --> 00:43:03,371
there were riots, white riots,
where they killed many Black people

763
00:43:03,372 --> 00:43:07,919
to make sure that the rest
of these niggas knew their place.

764
00:43:10,755 --> 00:43:13,466
Because Jack Johnson
was the first Black person

765
00:43:13,966 --> 00:43:19,097
to physically confront the color line
and win. And here's the punchline.

766
00:43:22,308 --> 00:43:24,936
He didn't just leave the arena
with his life.

767
00:43:25,853 --> 00:43:28,523
Jack Johnson had
a very particular proclivity.

768
00:43:29,357 --> 00:43:34,861
He left the arena with his life
and a white bitch. Let's talk about it.

769
00:43:34,862 --> 00:43:37,572
[audience cheering, applauding]

770
00:43:37,573 --> 00:43:40,492
You see, Jack Johnson
loved fucking white women.

771
00:43:40,493 --> 00:43:45,247
Almost exclusively,
he would fuck white women.

772
00:43:45,248 --> 00:43:49,292
And, man, the audacity of this nigga
beating white men up

773
00:43:49,293 --> 00:43:50,919
and fucking their bitches.

774
00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:53,047
[audience laughing]

775
00:43:55,800 --> 00:43:57,927
The Black boxing world was elated.

776
00:43:58,553 --> 00:44:01,221
And every great Black fighter
celebrated Jack Johnson.

777
00:44:01,222 --> 00:44:02,764
And they came to Jack Johnson, they said,

778
00:44:02,765 --> 00:44:05,976
"Jack, congratulations.
Can I get a title fight?"

779
00:44:05,977 --> 00:44:09,563
And Jack Johnson,
just like his white predecessors, said,

780
00:44:09,564 --> 00:44:12,233
"Well, I don't fight Black fighters."

781
00:44:13,359 --> 00:44:17,904
"I'm in the business of beating up
white guys and fucking their bitches."

782
00:44:17,905 --> 00:44:20,366
[audience laughing]

783
00:44:21,492 --> 00:44:22,910
And one after another...

784
00:44:24,078 --> 00:44:28,331
they lined up the Great White Hopes,
and Jack Johnson would vanquish them all.

785
00:44:28,332 --> 00:44:29,458
In fact...

786
00:44:30,376 --> 00:44:32,461
In fact, it took an act of Congress...

787
00:44:33,546 --> 00:44:34,672
to stop him.

788
00:44:37,216 --> 00:44:41,261
Congressman named Mann from Illinois
came up with an act called the "Mann Act."

789
00:44:41,262 --> 00:44:45,473
The Mann Act is the law
that says it is illegal

790
00:44:45,474 --> 00:44:49,603
to take a woman across state lines
for the purposes of debauchery.

791
00:44:49,604 --> 00:44:53,064
In my line of work,
got to know shit like that.

792
00:44:53,065 --> 00:44:56,027
[audience laughing]

793
00:44:56,611 --> 00:45:00,447
Jack Johnson got tried, prosecuted,
convicted of the Mann Act,

794
00:45:00,448 --> 00:45:02,949
fled the country,
was on the run for years,

795
00:45:02,950 --> 00:45:04,326
and it ruined his life.

796
00:45:04,327 --> 00:45:08,288
And then finally in 1946, he died
in the United States in a car crash.

797
00:45:08,289 --> 00:45:10,582
But before he died,
and this is one of my favorite quotes

798
00:45:10,583 --> 00:45:13,794
that any American ever said, he said,

799
00:45:15,046 --> 00:45:17,089
"I risked everything...

800
00:45:19,050 --> 00:45:20,384
for my pleasure."

801
00:45:22,136 --> 00:45:25,640
[audience cheering, applauding]

802
00:45:30,519 --> 00:45:33,064
You know, having freedom is one thing.

803
00:45:34,440 --> 00:45:36,484
Not having freedom is another thing.

804
00:45:37,235 --> 00:45:41,821
But using freedom that you don't have
takes an enormous amount of courage,

805
00:45:41,822 --> 00:45:43,991
no matter how selfish you are with it.

806
00:45:44,659 --> 00:45:45,952
And Jack Johnson...

807
00:45:47,078 --> 00:45:48,537
is an American riddle...

808
00:45:49,538 --> 00:45:50,998
that we've gotta solve.

809
00:45:52,250 --> 00:45:55,502
Not too long ago, but some years ago,
I was here in Washington.

810
00:45:55,503 --> 00:45:57,546
I was at-- I was at the MGM...

811
00:45:59,298 --> 00:46:02,301
at the-- at the National Harbor,
and I wasn't performing.

812
00:46:02,885 --> 00:46:05,429
I was at-- I was at a Stevie Wonder show.

813
00:46:05,930 --> 00:46:07,764
And Stevie Wonder didn't know I was there.

814
00:46:07,765 --> 00:46:09,474
I was on the side stage.

815
00:46:09,475 --> 00:46:11,434
[audience laughing]

816
00:46:11,435 --> 00:46:14,062
I got there late,
he was already doing the show.

817
00:46:14,063 --> 00:46:16,273
And this was a very special night.

818
00:46:16,274 --> 00:46:20,111
It-- It was the night...
It was the night before...

819
00:46:21,654 --> 00:46:23,572
Aretha Franklin's funeral.

820
00:46:25,157 --> 00:46:28,243
And-- And Aretha Franklin
was a very special person to me.

821
00:46:28,244 --> 00:46:33,415
The first time I ever played Radio City,
she gave me a job as her opening act.

822
00:46:33,416 --> 00:46:36,627
Mean boss, but great, great,
great, great, great, great artist.

823
00:46:38,796 --> 00:46:40,756
And Steve was on stage, killing it.

824
00:46:41,882 --> 00:46:43,843
And then in the middle of his set...

825
00:46:44,552 --> 00:46:46,304
he started to sing a medley

826
00:46:47,096 --> 00:46:50,682
of all the songs that he had
ever written for Aretha Franklin.

827
00:46:50,683 --> 00:46:53,018
And, man, I gotta tell you, it was a lot.

828
00:46:53,019 --> 00:46:55,603
Huge hits
that I didn't even know he wrote.

829
00:46:55,604 --> 00:46:58,773
And the crowd was grooving
and celebrating her life.

830
00:46:58,774 --> 00:47:01,694
And just suddenly, in the middle of it...

831
00:47:02,778 --> 00:47:04,530
Stevie broke down crying.

832
00:47:05,781 --> 00:47:08,909
Put his head down on the piano,
and I could hear him sob.

833
00:47:09,493 --> 00:47:10,619
And I was drunk.

834
00:47:11,162 --> 00:47:13,246
[audience laughing]

835
00:47:13,247 --> 00:47:15,832
And it hurts a man
to hear another man cry.

836
00:47:15,833 --> 00:47:19,669
And I didn't even think about it.
I was like, "I must go to him."

837
00:47:19,670 --> 00:47:21,880
[audience laughing]

838
00:47:21,881 --> 00:47:25,258
And I just walked down on stage.
And, you know, it's home.

839
00:47:25,259 --> 00:47:27,844
When the crowd saw me,
they started cheering.

840
00:47:27,845 --> 00:47:30,764
But Stevie didn't know it was me.
That nigga was looking like that falcon.

841
00:47:30,765 --> 00:47:34,143
[audience laughing]

842
00:47:47,490 --> 00:47:50,367
And I sat down next to him at the piano,
and I go, "Steve, it's me."

843
00:47:50,368 --> 00:47:51,701
And then he smiled real big,

844
00:47:51,702 --> 00:47:54,996
and we started cracking jokes
and singing songs.

845
00:47:54,997 --> 00:47:59,668
And-- And then after the show,
we were backstage, and he asked me...

846
00:48:01,379 --> 00:48:03,381
he said, "What are you doing tomorrow?"

847
00:48:04,965 --> 00:48:07,134
I said, "I'm gonna fly
to Detroit with you...

848
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:09,637
pay my respects to Ms. Franklin."

849
00:48:10,679 --> 00:48:11,889
And he said, "No."

850
00:48:13,265 --> 00:48:14,392
At that time...

851
00:48:15,559 --> 00:48:17,185
a senator had just passed away.

852
00:48:17,186 --> 00:48:20,022
The late, great John McCain
had passed away.

853
00:48:22,191 --> 00:48:24,860
And Stevie said,
"I need you to do me a favor."

854
00:48:25,486 --> 00:48:28,614
He said, "John McCain is laying
in state at the Capitol."

855
00:48:30,908 --> 00:48:32,868
He said, "I want you to go pay...

856
00:48:33,994 --> 00:48:35,579
our respects to him."

857
00:48:36,789 --> 00:48:39,542
[audience cheering, applauding]

858
00:48:40,918 --> 00:48:44,462
And I said, "Nigga, I would much rather go
to Detroit with you."

859
00:48:44,463 --> 00:48:47,550
[audience laughing]

860
00:48:49,510 --> 00:48:52,887
And then Stevie gave me that look.
He just looked like this, like...

861
00:48:52,888 --> 00:48:54,973
He didn't even know
I was all the way over here.

862
00:48:54,974 --> 00:48:57,476
[audience laughing]

863
00:48:58,894 --> 00:48:59,770
So, I went.

864
00:49:00,938 --> 00:49:02,355
The next day, I went to the Capitol.

865
00:49:02,356 --> 00:49:04,858
I-- I-- I don't do this for anyone
but Stevie Wonder.

866
00:49:04,859 --> 00:49:06,568
He can tell me
to do anything within reason.

867
00:49:06,569 --> 00:49:10,072
The only thing he's told me to do
that I won't do is stop smoking.

868
00:49:10,948 --> 00:49:12,158
That I won't do yet.

869
00:49:13,117 --> 00:49:14,868
But I did it. I waited in line,

870
00:49:14,869 --> 00:49:17,370
and then I got all the way
up to Senator McCain's casket,

871
00:49:17,371 --> 00:49:19,789
and I was just like,
"Uh, Stevie Wonder sent me."

872
00:49:19,790 --> 00:49:22,000
- [audience laughing]
- [chuckles]

873
00:49:22,001 --> 00:49:24,378
"Goodbye, nigga." And I just walked off.

874
00:49:25,754 --> 00:49:28,047
But I-- But that's what he wanted,
and so I did it.

875
00:49:28,048 --> 00:49:30,551
[audience laughing, murmuring]

876
00:49:34,180 --> 00:49:35,597
A lot of people don't know this,

877
00:49:35,598 --> 00:49:38,516
but people from Washington know this,
who are my age.

878
00:49:38,517 --> 00:49:40,060
A lot of people don't know

879
00:49:40,853 --> 00:49:42,354
that Martin Luther King,

880
00:49:43,355 --> 00:49:48,318
unlike Charlie Kirk,
had a harder time being remembered.

881
00:49:48,319 --> 00:49:50,028
[audience applauding, cheering]

882
00:49:50,029 --> 00:49:51,155
That...

883
00:49:51,989 --> 00:49:54,616
the only reason
that Martin Luther King's birthday

884
00:49:54,617 --> 00:49:57,327
is a holiday is because the King family

885
00:49:57,328 --> 00:50:02,333
and Stevie Wonder lobbied
very hard and very long

886
00:50:03,000 --> 00:50:04,375
for that holiday.

887
00:50:04,376 --> 00:50:07,712
[audience applauding, cheering]

888
00:50:07,713 --> 00:50:09,465
People forget.

889
00:50:11,050 --> 00:50:13,301
That what they call
"Black Happy Birthday,"

890
00:50:13,302 --> 00:50:16,596
the Stevie Wonder "Happy Birthday,"
was a protest song

891
00:50:16,597 --> 00:50:19,891
about making the King holiday a reality.

892
00:50:19,892 --> 00:50:26,898
<i>♪ Happy birthday to you ♪</i>

893
00:50:26,899 --> 00:50:29,442
<i>♪ Happy birthday ♪</i>

894
00:50:29,443 --> 00:50:31,278
And it was so effective.

895
00:50:32,071 --> 00:50:33,863
Finally, the Senate voted on it.

896
00:50:33,864 --> 00:50:40,329
Ninety-nine out of 100 senators
agreed to make that birthday a holiday.

897
00:50:42,122 --> 00:50:43,415
Except for one...

898
00:50:44,542 --> 00:50:45,625
John McCain.

899
00:50:45,626 --> 00:50:48,086
[audience laughing]

900
00:50:48,087 --> 00:50:51,173
The guy that Stevie sent me
to say goodbye to.

901
00:50:52,967 --> 00:50:55,636
What a great man Stevie Wonder is.

902
00:50:56,262 --> 00:50:58,389
How much this country could learn...

903
00:50:59,431 --> 00:51:00,849
from a man like that.

904
00:51:03,102 --> 00:51:04,937
John McCain, God bless him...

905
00:51:06,021 --> 00:51:07,897
he got himself in a pickle for that vote,

906
00:51:07,898 --> 00:51:10,401
but it came back
to get his ass years later.

907
00:51:10,943 --> 00:51:12,944
Years later, he was running for president

908
00:51:12,945 --> 00:51:16,823
and had to run against the first nigga
to ever get a party nomination.

909
00:51:16,824 --> 00:51:21,327
[audience cheering, applauding]

910
00:51:21,328 --> 00:51:23,788
And Barack Obama got that nomination

911
00:51:23,789 --> 00:51:29,002
on the anniversary
of Dr. King's "I Have a Dream" speech.

912
00:51:29,003 --> 00:51:32,006
[audience cheering, applauding]

913
00:51:33,215 --> 00:51:37,802
And of all the votes
in McCain's long career as a senator,

914
00:51:37,803 --> 00:51:41,932
that vote against that King holiday
had never haunted him

915
00:51:42,558 --> 00:51:44,268
like it did at that time.

916
00:51:44,935 --> 00:51:47,979
So, how did he counter that?
I'll tell you what he did.

917
00:51:47,980 --> 00:51:52,567
If you remember,
John McCain sponsored a bill

918
00:51:52,568 --> 00:51:58,741
to pardon Jack Johnson posthumously
of the Mann Act.

919
00:51:59,867 --> 00:52:05,873
Yes, he did sponsor that bill to pardon
Jack Johnson of the Mann Act.

920
00:52:06,373 --> 00:52:10,209
The Mann Act is precisely the law

921
00:52:10,210 --> 00:52:15,591
that Sean "Puffy" Combs
was convicted of just recently.

922
00:52:16,091 --> 00:52:20,345
America's Unstoppable Nigga Act.

923
00:52:20,346 --> 00:52:23,474
[audience laughing]

924
00:52:28,646 --> 00:52:32,983
Yeah, something else is going on,
but I don't know. Are you guys bored?

925
00:52:33,525 --> 00:52:35,069
[audience] No!

926
00:52:36,070 --> 00:52:38,404
Okay, I'm gonna keep going. There's more.

927
00:52:38,405 --> 00:52:41,533
[audience cheering, applauding]

928
00:52:48,749 --> 00:52:53,087
I hate conspiracy theories,
but I'll tell you one about... well...

929
00:52:54,296 --> 00:52:58,592
and this is not even a theory.
This part I know is a fact.

930
00:53:00,969 --> 00:53:04,765
[audience members shouting indistinctly]

931
00:53:06,600 --> 00:53:07,851
Did you know...

932
00:53:08,894 --> 00:53:12,438
when I left D.C. and moved
to New York in the '90s,

933
00:53:12,439 --> 00:53:16,359
that New York City Police Department
had a hip-hop police task force?

934
00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:17,653
Did you know that?

935
00:53:18,987 --> 00:53:21,739
And this task force would follow anybody

936
00:53:21,740 --> 00:53:24,283
that was involved
in hip-hop culture around.

937
00:53:24,284 --> 00:53:26,244
Not just rappers, drug dealers,

938
00:53:26,245 --> 00:53:28,246
'cause they thought
that it was connected somehow.

939
00:53:28,247 --> 00:53:32,333
Even young comedians like me.
Anybody that was just on that scene,

940
00:53:32,334 --> 00:53:34,961
they knew who everybody was
and what everybody was doing.

941
00:53:34,962 --> 00:53:38,172
And back in those days,
I used to go to nightclubs,

942
00:53:38,173 --> 00:53:39,424
but sometimes I'd go to a club

943
00:53:39,425 --> 00:53:41,342
and the lights would be
a little bit different.

944
00:53:41,343 --> 00:53:44,846
And I didn't notice, but the O.G.s
would pull me aside and be like,

945
00:53:44,847 --> 00:53:46,557
"Careful in the club, nigga."

946
00:53:47,850 --> 00:53:49,852
"They got the FBI lights up."

947
00:53:51,395 --> 00:53:55,857
Which meant that the lighting was strange
'cause the party was under surveillance

948
00:53:55,858 --> 00:53:57,859
and they were just telling me
to watch my back.

949
00:53:57,860 --> 00:54:00,194
And, you know,
I wasn't doing anything wrong anyway,

950
00:54:00,195 --> 00:54:02,155
nigga, just having a good time.

951
00:54:02,156 --> 00:54:03,824
[audience chuckling]

952
00:54:04,491 --> 00:54:09,328
Now, did you know that
that task force was invented originally

953
00:54:09,329 --> 00:54:11,415
to follow just two people around?

954
00:54:12,082 --> 00:54:15,209
Those people was
a guy named Christopher Wallace,

955
00:54:15,210 --> 00:54:17,796
a.k.a. the Notorious B.I.G.,

956
00:54:20,382 --> 00:54:23,802
and Sean "P. Diddy" Combs.

957
00:54:24,887 --> 00:54:26,847
Now, why is that?

958
00:54:27,514 --> 00:54:32,018
That this nigga has been
under surveillance for at least 30 years,

959
00:54:32,019 --> 00:54:36,481
but just now, just now they noticed
that he racketeers and beats up bitches?

960
00:54:36,482 --> 00:54:40,359
I bet you, I bet you,
if he was doing all that,

961
00:54:40,360 --> 00:54:43,696
I bet you they seen him
doing it for a long time.

962
00:54:43,697 --> 00:54:45,115
But why now?

963
00:54:45,949 --> 00:54:46,992
I don't know.

964
00:54:47,618 --> 00:54:50,704
It was strange, in this case,
nobody called the police,

965
00:54:51,538 --> 00:54:53,039
except for Kid Cudi.

966
00:54:53,040 --> 00:54:55,501
[audience laughing]

967
00:54:58,670 --> 00:55:01,048
And everybody called Kid Cudi a snitch.

968
00:55:02,883 --> 00:55:04,217
But he wasn't a snitch.

969
00:55:04,218 --> 00:55:06,677
A snitch is
when two niggas do crime together

970
00:55:06,678 --> 00:55:09,096
and one of them gets caught
and tells on the other one

971
00:55:09,097 --> 00:55:10,598
to get himself out of the trouble.

972
00:55:10,599 --> 00:55:13,392
Kid Cudi was violated by Puff.

973
00:55:13,393 --> 00:55:16,896
He alleged that Puff blew up
his motherfucking Porsche

974
00:55:16,897 --> 00:55:19,732
with a Molotov cocktail
and didn't stop there.

975
00:55:19,733 --> 00:55:22,903
He said-- He then alleged
that Puff broke into his house...

976
00:55:24,321 --> 00:55:27,657
and opened this nigga's Christmas gifts.

977
00:55:27,658 --> 00:55:30,327
[audience laughing]

978
00:55:31,578 --> 00:55:33,621
Oh, nigga, I'd have been furious.

979
00:55:33,622 --> 00:55:35,623
[audience laughing]

980
00:55:35,624 --> 00:55:38,292
Kid Cudi said, "I can't prove
that he opened the gifts or nothing,

981
00:55:38,293 --> 00:55:41,003
but I came in the house
and he was in there and the gifts was open

982
00:55:41,004 --> 00:55:44,048
and that nigga was just like,
'Merry Christmas, playboy.'"

983
00:55:44,049 --> 00:55:46,260
[audience laughing]

984
00:55:46,844 --> 00:55:48,594
So what was Kid Cudi supposed to do?

985
00:55:48,595 --> 00:55:51,181
He only got two choices. Either A,

986
00:55:52,182 --> 00:55:53,891
you're going to have
to do some gangster shit

987
00:55:53,892 --> 00:55:56,895
to this nigga that he's going
to have a hard time proving.

988
00:55:57,646 --> 00:55:59,356
Or if you're not built like that...

989
00:56:00,941 --> 00:56:03,526
and I do not believe
that Kid Cudi is built like that...

990
00:56:03,527 --> 00:56:05,570
[audience laughing]

991
00:56:05,571 --> 00:56:07,406
...your last option is B...

992
00:56:08,824 --> 00:56:10,325
you gotta call the police.

993
00:56:11,493 --> 00:56:12,828
And good for Kid Cudi.

994
00:56:13,704 --> 00:56:14,997
He did the right thing.

995
00:56:15,956 --> 00:56:17,332
I, on the other hand,

996
00:56:18,041 --> 00:56:19,417
oh, I'm built like that.

997
00:56:19,418 --> 00:56:21,252
[audience laughing]

998
00:56:21,253 --> 00:56:23,546
If this nigga fuck
my family's Christmas up,

999
00:56:23,547 --> 00:56:26,674
you better believe
I'm gonna make him suffer for that shit.

1000
00:56:26,675 --> 00:56:28,926
A nigga's gonna come up to me
and tell me all about it

1001
00:56:28,927 --> 00:56:30,261
and not even know I did it.

1002
00:56:30,262 --> 00:56:31,846
"Oh, my God, Dave!"

1003
00:56:31,847 --> 00:56:33,307
[sobs]

1004
00:56:33,974 --> 00:56:36,183
"Did you hear what happened to Puffy?"

1005
00:56:36,184 --> 00:56:38,144
"Oh, my God, no. What happened?"

1006
00:56:38,145 --> 00:56:39,937
[audience laughing]

1007
00:56:39,938 --> 00:56:41,773
[sobs]

1008
00:56:44,151 --> 00:56:47,779
"He was jogging
by himself in Topanga Canyon."

1009
00:56:49,197 --> 00:56:52,199
"A falcon came out of nowhere
and killed this nigga!"

1010
00:56:52,200 --> 00:56:53,451
"Oh, my God."

1011
00:56:53,452 --> 00:56:56,538
[audience laughing, applauding]

1012
00:57:05,589 --> 00:57:07,215
I love hip-hop music.

1013
00:57:07,799 --> 00:57:11,303
I love many of the people
that make that music.

1014
00:57:12,304 --> 00:57:14,347
They taught me things and showed me things

1015
00:57:14,348 --> 00:57:16,599
that I'd never seen
for myself, good things.

1016
00:57:16,600 --> 00:57:19,685
For example, I was in Atlanta once.

1017
00:57:19,686 --> 00:57:21,687
I'm almost done. Hang in there, champ.

1018
00:57:21,688 --> 00:57:24,066
[audience laughing]

1019
00:57:26,443 --> 00:57:27,736
I was in Atlanta...

1020
00:57:29,655 --> 00:57:32,198
and a rapper named T.I...

1021
00:57:32,199 --> 00:57:34,408
[audience cheering]

1022
00:57:34,409 --> 00:57:36,160
...called me up. Now, at this time,

1023
00:57:36,161 --> 00:57:37,912
I didn't know him well,
I know him better now,

1024
00:57:37,913 --> 00:57:40,247
but I knew him well enough
that he'd had my phone number.

1025
00:57:40,248 --> 00:57:44,001
And the nigga called me up, he was like,
"Dave, I heard you was in my city."

1026
00:57:44,002 --> 00:57:45,795
[audience chuckles]

1027
00:57:45,796 --> 00:57:48,840
He said,
"I want to show you the real Atlanta."

1028
00:57:49,883 --> 00:57:51,759
I said, "Fuck yeah, nigga, let's go."

1029
00:57:51,760 --> 00:57:53,761
[audience laughing]

1030
00:57:53,762 --> 00:57:56,305
He said, "Meet me downstairs
in your hotel valet."

1031
00:57:56,306 --> 00:57:57,431
So I went downstairs.

1032
00:57:57,432 --> 00:57:59,433
I thought he was fucking around,
but when I went down there,

1033
00:57:59,434 --> 00:58:03,020
he was outside in the valet,
sitting in a purple Phantom.

1034
00:58:03,021 --> 00:58:05,815
This car must have been
a million and a half dollars.

1035
00:58:05,816 --> 00:58:08,693
Beautiful purple color
with ivory-white seats.

1036
00:58:08,694 --> 00:58:11,445
It's the kind of car
that you gotta have a chauffeur to drive,

1037
00:58:11,446 --> 00:58:14,824
but for some reason,
this nigga was driving it himself.

1038
00:58:14,825 --> 00:58:17,284
[audience laughing]

1039
00:58:17,285 --> 00:58:18,744
And I didn't ask no questions.

1040
00:58:18,745 --> 00:58:23,332
I just jumped in the car and, man,
he showed me Atlanta, everything.

1041
00:58:23,333 --> 00:58:25,668
"Outkast and them
started rapping over there

1042
00:58:25,669 --> 00:58:28,629
and Future used to play
in the playground over here."

1043
00:58:28,630 --> 00:58:31,425
[audience chuckling]

1044
00:58:32,384 --> 00:58:36,054
And then he slowed the car up
and he pointed to a house and he goes...

1045
00:58:36,555 --> 00:58:39,725
"And Martin Luther King
grew up in that house right there."

1046
00:58:40,851 --> 00:58:43,270
"And he raised his children over here."

1047
00:58:44,104 --> 00:58:47,733
"And that's the church
he preached in over there."

1048
00:58:50,652 --> 00:58:54,197
And then... we stopped at a red light,

1049
00:58:55,365 --> 00:58:56,866
and these little Black kids

1050
00:58:56,867 --> 00:59:00,119
rushed the car from either side
of the intersection with water bottles.

1051
00:59:00,120 --> 00:59:04,249
These kids in Atlanta, if you know,
they're called the Water Boys.

1052
00:59:04,875 --> 00:59:08,169
Their whole hustle is
they sell water to people who are stuck

1053
00:59:08,170 --> 00:59:09,963
in that hot Atlanta traffic.

1054
00:59:10,589 --> 00:59:12,048
I didn't know that.

1055
00:59:12,049 --> 00:59:14,467
I just saw these young niggas
running up on the car,

1056
00:59:14,468 --> 00:59:16,177
so I locked the door like, "Fuck that."

1057
00:59:16,178 --> 00:59:18,889
[audience laughing]

1058
00:59:25,270 --> 00:59:29,440
But T.I. rolled his window down,
started giving the kids orders.

1059
00:59:29,441 --> 00:59:31,692
"Slow down, don't just run up
on somebody's car."

1060
00:59:31,693 --> 00:59:33,903
"You don't know what they got in there."

1061
00:59:33,904 --> 00:59:35,905
"And smile so you look less threatening."

1062
00:59:35,906 --> 00:59:39,700
"And remember your manners.
'Yes, sir. No, ma'am. Please, thank you.'"

1063
00:59:39,701 --> 00:59:41,118
"That'll keep you alive."

1064
00:59:41,119 --> 00:59:45,748
"And keep that condensation on that water

1065
00:59:45,749 --> 00:59:49,211
so it looks refreshing and delicious."

1066
00:59:50,545 --> 00:59:53,422
And then that kid realized
that he was talking to a legend.

1067
00:59:53,423 --> 00:59:56,509
He said, "Oh, my God."
He said, "Thanks, T.I."

1068
00:59:56,510 --> 00:59:58,219
And held his hand out for some money.

1069
00:59:58,220 --> 00:59:59,970
And that nigga T.I.
looked at him and said,

1070
00:59:59,971 --> 01:00:03,808
"I done gave you the game,"
and rolled up the window and drove away.

1071
01:00:03,809 --> 01:00:07,145
[audience laughing, applauding]

1072
01:00:16,530 --> 01:00:17,572
That night...

1073
01:00:21,535 --> 01:00:22,869
I did my show...

1074
01:00:23,995 --> 01:00:27,206
and when I got off stage,
T.I. was backstage with a friend of his

1075
01:00:27,207 --> 01:00:30,167
that I didn't know.
I just knew his friend was somebody,

1076
01:00:30,168 --> 01:00:32,878
because everyone was acting
all excited that he was back there.

1077
01:00:32,879 --> 01:00:35,422
So I asked him,
I go, "Yo, Tip, who's your man?"

1078
01:00:35,423 --> 01:00:37,174
And he's like, "Oh, that right there?"

1079
01:00:37,175 --> 01:00:40,845
He goes, "That there
is the future of hip-hop."

1080
01:00:40,846 --> 01:00:42,471
And I was like,
"Nigga, will you just calm down?"

1081
01:00:42,472 --> 01:00:43,806
So then I asked the dude.

1082
01:00:43,807 --> 01:00:45,266
[audience chuckling]

1083
01:00:45,267 --> 01:00:47,853
I say, "Yo, my man."
I said, "What's your name?"

1084
01:00:48,395 --> 01:00:51,565
And the dude looked over,
he said... he said, "I'm Nipsey."

1085
01:00:52,149 --> 01:00:55,694
[audience cheering, applauding]

1086
01:00:57,195 --> 01:00:58,947
And this was Nipsey Hussle.

1087
01:01:00,198 --> 01:01:03,326
Not gonna go all into it,
but I gotta tell you, that night...

1088
01:01:04,161 --> 01:01:07,247
that night, me and T.I.
and Nipsey went out...

1089
01:01:08,498 --> 01:01:11,375
and we had a fucking blast.

1090
01:01:11,376 --> 01:01:13,919
Good time, not freak-off fun, but fun.

1091
01:01:13,920 --> 01:01:16,423
[audience laughing]

1092
01:01:17,299 --> 01:01:20,551
So much so
that when I got home from the road,

1093
01:01:20,552 --> 01:01:23,637
and my wife always asks me,
she goes, "Dave, how was your trip?"

1094
01:01:23,638 --> 01:01:24,972
Normally I'm just like, "It was good."

1095
01:01:24,973 --> 01:01:29,185
But this time I was like,
"Babe, babe, I met the coolest nigga."

1096
01:01:29,186 --> 01:01:32,730
I said, "This nigga's younger than me,
but it's like he's older than me."

1097
01:01:32,731 --> 01:01:35,191
And she's like, "Wha-- What?"
She goes, "What does that mean?"

1098
01:01:35,192 --> 01:01:37,484
And I was like,
"I don't know, bitch. He's like..."

1099
01:01:37,485 --> 01:01:40,238
[audience laughing]

1100
01:01:41,573 --> 01:01:43,240
"It's like hanging out
with a fortune cookie."

1101
01:01:43,241 --> 01:01:45,409
"This nigga just had
an answer for everything."

1102
01:01:45,410 --> 01:01:47,579
[audience laughing]

1103
01:01:49,664 --> 01:01:51,333
I told her all about Nipsey.

1104
01:01:52,125 --> 01:01:54,336
What was funny about it is years later,

1105
01:01:54,878 --> 01:01:58,214
I saw Nipsey's widow
and she pulled me aside.

1106
01:01:58,215 --> 01:01:59,423
I'd never met her.

1107
01:01:59,424 --> 01:02:02,635
And she said, "I just want to tell you
that my husband loved you."

1108
01:02:02,636 --> 01:02:06,847
She said, "He said he met you
in Atlanta and you had a wonderful time."

1109
01:02:06,848 --> 01:02:09,517
I said, "Boy, that's fucking crazy.
We sure did."

1110
01:02:11,728 --> 01:02:14,981
Not long after I met Nipsey,
I was in L.A. doing a show.

1111
01:02:16,566 --> 01:02:18,692
And then after the show,
I got a text from a guy that says,

1112
01:02:18,693 --> 01:02:21,612
"I'm at a party you need to be at."
And I was like, "I'm gonna go to bed."

1113
01:02:21,613 --> 01:02:24,698
And he's like, "No, nigga,
you have to come to this party."

1114
01:02:24,699 --> 01:02:27,493
So I'm thinking
this must be the freak-off, finally.

1115
01:02:27,494 --> 01:02:31,039
[audience laughing]

1116
01:02:35,877 --> 01:02:38,712
And the party was at a place
that I'd been to a million times.

1117
01:02:38,713 --> 01:02:40,547
So I wasn't excited
about being in that place.

1118
01:02:40,548 --> 01:02:43,051
But when I walked in,
it just was different.

1119
01:02:43,843 --> 01:02:45,095
It was popping.

1120
01:02:45,887 --> 01:02:49,599
And it turns out
that the party was for Nipsey.

1121
01:02:50,100 --> 01:02:53,143
Nipsey had been nominated
for Rap Album of the Year,

1122
01:02:53,144 --> 01:02:56,438
and everyone that he would have
ever respected was at the party.

1123
01:02:56,439 --> 01:02:58,232
[audience cheering, applauding]

1124
01:02:58,233 --> 01:03:01,485
T.I. was there,
Snoop was there, Jay-Z was there,

1125
01:03:01,486 --> 01:03:04,238
Puffy, before we knew
he did all that stuff, was there.

1126
01:03:04,239 --> 01:03:05,447
[audience laughing]

1127
01:03:05,448 --> 01:03:07,408
I was there, on and on and on.

1128
01:03:07,409 --> 01:03:09,910
And as good as the party was
when I was partying,

1129
01:03:09,911 --> 01:03:12,371
I was having fun,
but I had a pit in my stomach

1130
01:03:12,372 --> 01:03:14,206
'cause it reminded me of the '90s.

1131
01:03:14,207 --> 01:03:17,042
And you can believe me
or you cannot believe me.

1132
01:03:17,043 --> 01:03:20,504
I'm just telling you how I saw
and how I felt.

1133
01:03:20,505 --> 01:03:23,300
They had the FBI-- the FBI lights up.

1134
01:03:23,883 --> 01:03:26,844
I just felt like,
"Man, this party's under surveillance,"

1135
01:03:26,845 --> 01:03:29,096
but I didn't think too much of it.

1136
01:03:29,097 --> 01:03:32,016
And then I went back home to Ohio,
and I was taking a nap,

1137
01:03:32,017 --> 01:03:35,144
and my wife shook me awake
and she had tears in her eyes

1138
01:03:35,145 --> 01:03:37,855
and she said, "David."
I said, "What's going on with you?"

1139
01:03:37,856 --> 01:03:40,024
She said, "Your friend is dead."

1140
01:03:40,025 --> 01:03:41,275
And I'm old now, so I'm like,

1141
01:03:41,276 --> 01:03:43,527
"Bitch, you're gonna have
to be more specific than that."

1142
01:03:43,528 --> 01:03:44,903
[audience laughing]

1143
01:03:44,904 --> 01:03:46,488
I know niggas with gout.

1144
01:03:46,489 --> 01:03:49,326
[audience laughing]

1145
01:03:56,833 --> 01:03:58,168
But it was Nipsey.

1146
01:03:59,419 --> 01:04:01,920
And this is why I feel
for Charlie Kirk's fans

1147
01:04:01,921 --> 01:04:04,965
because I know what it's like
to see someone you look up to

1148
01:04:04,966 --> 01:04:09,429
and admire gunned down
by a fucking nobody.

1149
01:04:10,096 --> 01:04:11,806
Oh, my God.

1150
01:04:13,224 --> 01:04:15,268
It's so hard to accept that.

1151
01:04:16,353 --> 01:04:20,356
And if you looked on the internet
and-- and saw all those terrible videos,

1152
01:04:20,357 --> 01:04:23,651
because there was a very gory video
of Nipsey's murder too.

1153
01:04:25,070 --> 01:04:27,446
And then I-- I looked
in the comments section,

1154
01:04:27,447 --> 01:04:30,115
and-- and the internet
was doing what it does,

1155
01:04:30,116 --> 01:04:33,452
and everyone was coming up
with one conspiracy theory after another,

1156
01:04:33,453 --> 01:04:37,790
but the one that I kept seeing
the most involved a holistic doctor

1157
01:04:37,791 --> 01:04:40,418
in New York City. Have you heard it?

1158
01:04:41,252 --> 01:04:43,588
[audience murmuring]

1159
01:04:44,672 --> 01:04:48,760
It's a doctor named Dr. Sebi.

1160
01:04:52,722 --> 01:04:57,394
In the mid-'90s, during the height
of the AIDS epidemic,

1161
01:04:58,311 --> 01:05:02,147
a Black holistic doctor
in New York named Dr. Sebi claimed

1162
01:05:02,148 --> 01:05:06,402
that he cured two people
of AIDS and HIV holistically.

1163
01:05:06,403 --> 01:05:08,987
And at that time,
that was an illegal claim

1164
01:05:08,988 --> 01:05:12,324
to make in the United States
because of the FDA.

1165
01:05:12,325 --> 01:05:15,661
So the federal government
took Dr. Sebi to court

1166
01:05:15,662 --> 01:05:18,998
and New York State took Dr. Sebi to court.

1167
01:05:20,417 --> 01:05:23,503
And Dr. Sebi beat both cases.

1168
01:05:24,003 --> 01:05:27,048
[audience applauding]

1169
01:05:27,674 --> 01:05:31,260
And Nipsey Hussle, unbeknownst to many,

1170
01:05:31,261 --> 01:05:34,389
was making a documentary,
he was producing it,

1171
01:05:34,931 --> 01:05:38,767
about Dr. Sebi's work and his life.

1172
01:05:38,768 --> 01:05:45,066
And people on the internet believe
that larger powers killed Nipsey Hussle

1173
01:05:45,900 --> 01:05:48,110
to keep that information from you and I.

1174
01:05:48,111 --> 01:05:49,195
[clicks tongue]

1175
01:05:50,196 --> 01:05:53,408
I don't know. I honestly don't know.

1176
01:05:54,826 --> 01:05:57,787
But I'll tell you something
that I do know.

1177
01:05:59,789 --> 01:06:04,627
The greatest comedian I've ever seen
with my own eyes is Charlie Barnett.

1178
01:06:05,795 --> 01:06:10,424
Charlie Barnett,
a New York street comedy legend.

1179
01:06:10,425 --> 01:06:14,220
He only did comedy on the streets,
and I was lucky enough to meet him.

1180
01:06:14,929 --> 01:06:16,389
He was a mentor of mine.

1181
01:06:17,056 --> 01:06:20,977
Charlie Barnett was so good at performing
on the streets that from the streets,

1182
01:06:21,603 --> 01:06:24,647
he booked himself a job
on <i>Saturday Night Live.</i>

1183
01:06:26,316 --> 01:06:29,819
Yeah, but the week of rehearsals,
they found out that he couldn't read.

1184
01:06:30,820 --> 01:06:34,657
So they fired him
and replaced him with Eddie Murphy.

1185
01:06:35,950 --> 01:06:37,826
Oh, it could have been beautiful.

1186
01:06:37,827 --> 01:06:40,621
But you gotta be able to read
to do <i>Saturday Night Live.</i>

1187
01:06:40,622 --> 01:06:42,539
I know y'all saw Bad Bunny last week.

1188
01:06:42,540 --> 01:06:45,251
[audience laughing]

1189
01:06:49,631 --> 01:06:52,341
I'm not knocking him, but that
nigga's reading, you know what I mean?

1190
01:06:52,342 --> 01:06:54,886
[audience laughing]

1191
01:06:56,638 --> 01:06:59,640
Charlie Barnett wasn't deterred.
He kept pushing.

1192
01:06:59,641 --> 01:07:03,310
And he went on to do movies like <i>D.C. Cab,</i>
which is where I first saw him.

1193
01:07:03,311 --> 01:07:05,145
He used to be on <i>Miami Vice.</i>

1194
01:07:05,146 --> 01:07:07,773
This motherfucker became a star
in his own right.

1195
01:07:07,774 --> 01:07:09,983
But the thing that kept derailing him

1196
01:07:09,984 --> 01:07:13,530
is that Charlie was
a terrible drug addict.

1197
01:07:14,155 --> 01:07:17,157
This nigga started doing crack
to quit heroin.

1198
01:07:17,158 --> 01:07:18,242
He was doomed.

1199
01:07:18,243 --> 01:07:20,202
[audience chuckling]

1200
01:07:20,203 --> 01:07:23,622
He learned how to do street comedy
from a guy named Swami X,

1201
01:07:23,623 --> 01:07:26,041
and Swami X didn't just teach him
how to do comedy,

1202
01:07:26,042 --> 01:07:30,003
he taught him how to get high,
and Charlie never could shake it.

1203
01:07:30,004 --> 01:07:33,590
And when Charlie mentored me,
even though he was a terrible drug addict,

1204
01:07:33,591 --> 01:07:35,300
I never saw him high.

1205
01:07:35,301 --> 01:07:38,095
He never wanted
to do to me what Swami did to him.

1206
01:07:38,096 --> 01:07:42,307
He made sure I understood
that cocaine is just not for you

1207
01:07:42,308 --> 01:07:44,893
even though those bitches are prettier
than them ugly weed bitches

1208
01:07:44,894 --> 01:07:46,186
you be hanging out with.

1209
01:07:46,187 --> 01:07:48,690
[audience laughing]

1210
01:07:51,067 --> 01:07:55,989
One night, I saw Charlie in a comedy club

1211
01:07:56,739 --> 01:07:58,700
and he looked terrible.

1212
01:07:59,492 --> 01:08:01,743
And this guy would avoid me
if he was getting high,

1213
01:08:01,744 --> 01:08:03,788
but I'd never seen him look this bad.

1214
01:08:04,330 --> 01:08:07,834
So I said to him,
I said, "Charlie, you good?"

1215
01:08:08,751 --> 01:08:10,211
And he didn't say anything.

1216
01:08:11,421 --> 01:08:12,964
And I said, "Are you high?"

1217
01:08:13,673 --> 01:08:14,841
And he laughed.

1218
01:08:16,217 --> 01:08:19,095
He said, "No, nigga, I'm not high."

1219
01:08:20,346 --> 01:08:21,806
He said, "I'm dying."

1220
01:08:22,849 --> 01:08:24,183
And I said, "What?"

1221
01:08:24,892 --> 01:08:26,561
And he said, "I'm dying."

1222
01:08:27,562 --> 01:08:28,813
"I have AIDS."

1223
01:08:29,772 --> 01:08:30,857
"And I'm dying."

1224
01:08:31,357 --> 01:08:33,108
Now, I must've been 18 or 19.

1225
01:08:33,109 --> 01:08:35,527
I'd never met nobody
that I knew of that had AIDS.

1226
01:08:35,528 --> 01:08:38,113
But I got to tell you,
that-- that shit had me shook.

1227
01:08:38,114 --> 01:08:40,449
And then I started thinking
of all his jokes.

1228
01:08:40,450 --> 01:08:42,659
And he was hinting at it for years.

1229
01:08:42,660 --> 01:08:44,369
Didn't he used
to have a joke where he said,

1230
01:08:44,370 --> 01:08:47,664
"I took an AIDS test yesterday.
I got a 65."

1231
01:08:47,665 --> 01:08:50,752
[audience laughing]

1232
01:08:53,713 --> 01:08:56,381
[chuckles] Another time
he was on stage at the Apollo,

1233
01:08:56,382 --> 01:08:59,009
and he told the crowd,
"There's good and bad in everything."

1234
01:08:59,010 --> 01:09:00,594
And the crowd was like, "Yeah."

1235
01:09:00,595 --> 01:09:02,429
He said, "So what's good about crack?"

1236
01:09:02,430 --> 01:09:05,098
And, you know, everybody
in Harlem was like, "Nothing."

1237
01:09:05,099 --> 01:09:10,479
And he said, "Shit, crack brought
the price of pussy down to five dollars."

1238
01:09:10,480 --> 01:09:13,858
[audience laughing]

1239
01:09:20,573 --> 01:09:22,991
But when he said he had AIDS,
I was so shocked

1240
01:09:22,992 --> 01:09:25,243
that I looked at him
to see if he was joking.

1241
01:09:25,244 --> 01:09:29,248
And I knew, I said, "He's... He's serious."

1242
01:09:30,667 --> 01:09:32,834
And I said, "Fuck that shit."

1243
01:09:32,835 --> 01:09:34,086
He said, "What you mean?"

1244
01:09:34,087 --> 01:09:36,088
I said, "You're not going
to die around me, nigga."

1245
01:09:36,089 --> 01:09:37,464
"That's not your destiny."

1246
01:09:37,465 --> 01:09:39,216
He said, "What are you talking about?"

1247
01:09:39,217 --> 01:09:44,138
And I took Charlie Barnett
to Dr. Sebi.

1248
01:09:45,014 --> 01:09:46,515
This is a fact.

1249
01:09:46,516 --> 01:09:50,811
And Dr. Sebi treated Charlie Barnett
for three months.

1250
01:09:50,812 --> 01:09:53,355
This is a crazy story.
I could make a whole movie about it.

1251
01:09:53,356 --> 01:09:54,815
It's a long story, so I'll spare you.

1252
01:09:54,816 --> 01:09:58,653
But the point of the story is,
Charlie died of AIDS.

1253
01:09:59,320 --> 01:10:03,700
[audience laughing]

1254
01:10:16,963 --> 01:10:21,508
D.C., no matter how much this government
or anyone else puts pressure on you,

1255
01:10:21,509 --> 01:10:23,510
keep your wits about you.

1256
01:10:23,511 --> 01:10:26,179
I'm here just to remind you
that we are a community,

1257
01:10:26,180 --> 01:10:29,391
- and we will stay sane together.
- [audience applauding, cheering]

1258
01:10:29,392 --> 01:10:34,397
We will take care of each other,
and we will wait this orange nigga out.

1259
01:10:34,897 --> 01:10:40,153
[audience cheering]

1260
01:10:45,825 --> 01:10:48,702
[audience members shouting indistinctly]

1261
01:10:48,703 --> 01:10:51,247
The fear that I have for myself

1262
01:10:51,789 --> 01:10:54,834
that I need you to protect me from
is co-option.

1263
01:10:55,752 --> 01:11:00,797
My voice has become more powerful
than I intended it to be,

1264
01:11:00,798 --> 01:11:04,885
and I cannot let these niggas do me
like Charlie Kirk,

1265
01:11:04,886 --> 01:11:07,513
or even worse than that.

1266
01:11:08,556 --> 01:11:12,101
What if these niggas trip me up somehow,
co-opt me,

1267
01:11:12,769 --> 01:11:15,979
and then make me say the things
that they want me to say?

1268
01:11:15,980 --> 01:11:17,440
Well, we can't have that.

1269
01:11:18,483 --> 01:11:20,735
So, just in case,

1270
01:11:21,903 --> 01:11:22,904
we need a code.

1271
01:11:23,404 --> 01:11:26,281
[audience laughing]

1272
01:11:26,282 --> 01:11:29,201
It's gotta be something that I can say
so that if I say it,

1273
01:11:29,202 --> 01:11:30,995
you know that these niggas got me.

1274
01:11:32,747 --> 01:11:36,083
And don't listen to nothing that I say
after I say those words.

1275
01:11:37,502 --> 01:11:40,420
But don't tell anybody what it is,
but it's gotta be something that,

1276
01:11:40,421 --> 01:11:43,089
you know what I mean,
that I would never say.

1277
01:11:43,090 --> 01:11:44,549
Oh, I know what the code is.

1278
01:11:44,550 --> 01:11:47,135
The code word is, "I stand with Israel."

1279
01:11:47,136 --> 01:11:49,262
Thank you very much, and good night.

1280
01:11:49,263 --> 01:11:52,224
[audience applauding, cheering]

1281
01:11:52,225 --> 01:11:55,770
{\an8}["Joy Inside My Tears"
by Stevie Wonder playing]

1282
01:12:11,285 --> 01:12:15,997
{\an8}<i>♪ I've always come to the conclusion ♪</i>

1283
01:12:15,998 --> 01:12:19,126
{\an8}<i>♪ That "but" is the way ♪</i>

1284
01:12:20,753 --> 01:12:23,046
{\an8}<i>♪ Of asking for permission ♪</i>

1285
01:12:23,047 --> 01:12:27,009
<i>♪ To lay something heavy on one's head ♪</i>

1286
01:12:30,221 --> 01:12:34,140
{\an8}<i>♪ So I have tried to not be the one ♪</i>

1287
01:12:34,141 --> 01:12:37,979
{\an8}<i>♪ Who'll fall into that line ♪</i>

1288
01:12:39,522 --> 01:12:45,695
{\an8}<i>♪ But what I feel inside
I think you should know ♪</i>

1289
01:12:45,820 --> 01:12:47,904
{\an8}<i>♪ Oh ♪</i>

1290
01:12:47,905 --> 01:12:51,492
{\an8}<i>♪ And baby, that's you, you, you ♪</i>

1291
01:12:52,994 --> 01:12:56,330
{\an8}<i>♪ Made life's history ♪</i>

1292
01:12:59,542 --> 01:13:05,339
{\an8}<i>♪ 'Cause you've brought
Some joy inside my tears ♪</i>

1293
01:13:08,175 --> 01:13:10,469
{\an8}<i>♪ You have done ♪</i>

1294
01:13:11,262 --> 01:13:15,182
{\an8}<i>♪ What no one thought could be ♪</i>

1295
01:13:15,975 --> 01:13:17,602
{\an8}<i>♪ Oh, oh-oh ♪</i>

1296
01:13:18,769 --> 01:13:24,400
{\an8}<i>♪ You've brought some joy
Inside my tears ♪</i>

1297
01:13:27,236 --> 01:13:30,989
{\an8}<i>♪ I've always felt that tomorrow is for ♪</i>

1298
01:13:30,990 --> 01:13:35,244
{\an8}<i>♪ Those who are too much afraid ♪</i>

1299
01:13:36,287 --> 01:13:42,501
{\an8}<i>♪ To go past yesterday
And start living for today ♪</i>

1300
01:13:45,922 --> 01:13:50,550
<i>♪ I feel that lasting moments are coming ♪</i>

1301
01:13:50,551 --> 01:13:54,096
<i>♪ Far and few between ♪</i>

1302
01:13:55,473 --> 01:14:01,562
{\an8}<i>♪ So I should tell you
Of the happiness that you bring ♪</i>

1303
01:14:03,189 --> 01:14:07,109
{\an8}<i>♪ Baby, baby, it's you, you, you ♪</i>

1304
01:14:08,444 --> 01:14:11,948
<i>♪ Made life's history ♪</i>

1305
01:14:13,115 --> 01:14:14,450
{\an8}<i>♪ Oh, baby ♪</i>

1306
01:14:15,451 --> 01:14:20,039
{\an8}<i>♪ You've brought some joy
Inside my tears ♪</i>

1307
01:14:22,541 --> 01:14:26,128
<i>♪ Baby, you have done ♪</i>

1308
01:14:26,921 --> 01:14:30,800
<i>♪ What no one thought could be ♪</i>

1309
01:14:32,176 --> 01:14:33,761
<i>♪ Yeah ♪</i>

1310
01:14:34,261 --> 01:14:39,266
<i>♪ You've brought some joy
Inside my tears ♪</i>

1311
01:14:42,019 --> 01:14:43,396
<i>♪ Yeah ♪</i>

1312
01:14:43,896 --> 01:14:48,734
<i>♪ You've brought some joy
Inside my tears ♪</i>

1313
01:14:49,735 --> 01:14:52,822
<i>♪ Oh ♪</i>

1314
01:14:53,364 --> 01:14:58,493
<i>♪ You've brought some joy
Inside my ♪</i>

1315
01:14:58,494 --> 01:15:03,958
{\an8}<i>♪ Tears ♪</i>

1316
01:15:05,209 --> 01:15:09,130
{\an8}<i>♪ Doo, doo, do, do, do, do ♪</i>

1317
01:15:10,506 --> 01:15:12,382
{\an8}<i>♪ Yeah, yeah ♪</i>

1318
01:15:12,383 --> 01:15:17,054
{\an8}<i>♪ You've brought some joy
Inside my tears ♪</i>

1319
01:15:19,056 --> 01:15:20,724
<i>♪ Baby, baby ♪</i>

1320
01:15:20,725 --> 01:15:27,523
<i>♪ You have done
What no one thought could be ♪</i>

1321
01:15:29,066 --> 01:15:30,525
<i>♪ Yeah ♪</i>

1322
01:15:30,526 --> 01:15:32,361
[song fades]

1323
01:15:33,863 --> 01:15:35,364
[janitor] <i>I'm rich biatch!</i>