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Downloaded from
YTS.BZ

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.BZ

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What a God almighty fucking waste of time.

4
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Jesus, what's eating you now?

5
00:01:10,883 --> 00:01:14,723
The title character has
had a cardiac infarction.

6
00:01:15,363 --> 00:01:16,340
Bruce is dead.

7
00:01:16,364 --> 00:01:18,339
Well, at least he's consistent.

8
00:01:18,363 --> 00:01:20,539
They'll just get another
one from the boat shed.

9
00:01:20,563 --> 00:01:22,659
How many of those things
have they got, anyway?

10
00:01:22,683 --> 00:01:24,499
Three? Four?

11
00:01:24,523 --> 00:01:27,523
I mean, we've been on
this boat, what, five days?

12
00:01:27,643 --> 00:01:29,699
None of them fucking work.

13
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:32,723
This whole thing is a disaster.

14
00:01:32,763 --> 00:01:33,740
Christ. It's cold.

15
00:01:33,764 --> 00:01:35,659
Is this thing working?

16
00:01:35,683 --> 00:01:37,403
Let me try.

17
00:01:41,203 --> 00:01:42,803
That should do it.

18
00:01:44,443 --> 00:01:44,860
Jesus.

19
00:01:44,884 --> 00:01:46,299
What are they doing to it?

20
00:01:46,323 --> 00:01:47,579
Don't ask me, man.

21
00:01:47,603 --> 00:01:49,499
Why did it take so goddamn long?

22
00:01:49,523 --> 00:01:52,459
Well, it's not the time it takes to
take the take that takes the time.

23
00:01:52,483 --> 00:01:55,763
It's the time it takes between the
takes that takes the time to take the take.

24
00:01:56,843 --> 00:01:59,163
How much time did that take you?

25
00:01:59,363 --> 00:02:01,859
Why are the goddamn things so unreliable?

26
00:02:01,883 --> 00:02:03,819
You know, they can put a man on the moon,

27
00:02:03,843 --> 00:02:06,579
but they can't make a
mechanical fish that floats.

28
00:02:06,603 --> 00:02:09,379
I was talking with Bob, and
as I understand it, it's to do

29
00:02:09,403 --> 00:02:11,179
with the dynamics of the mechanism.

30
00:02:11,203 --> 00:02:15,203
You see, Bruce is powered by
pneumatics, right, rather than hydraulics?

31
00:02:16,003 --> 00:02:18,139
Well, because oil and water don't mix.
Right.

32
00:02:18,163 --> 00:02:20,779
Well, Bruce is designed to be
a neutral weight, so he floats.

33
00:02:20,803 --> 00:02:25,099
But pneumatics uses compressed
air and compressed air causes

34
00:02:25,123 --> 00:02:26,779
fluctuations in the weight.

35
00:02:26,803 --> 00:02:30,883
So the longer he's out there and the
more he moves, the heavier he gets.

36
00:02:31,283 --> 00:02:34,283
That's fascinating, Roy.

37
00:02:35,443 --> 00:02:38,683
You know, makes me think it would
have been easier to get a real shark.

38
00:02:43,483 --> 00:02:45,139
You serious?

39
00:02:45,163 --> 00:02:46,219
Sure.

40
00:02:46,243 --> 00:02:48,499
Why not? Just get a tame shark.

41
00:02:48,523 --> 00:02:50,379
How hard can it be?

42
00:02:50,403 --> 00:02:52,699
You ever seen a real live shark?

43
00:02:52,723 --> 00:02:53,739
I'm from Queens, man!

44
00:02:53,763 --> 00:02:55,979
Of course I've never
seen a real live shark.

45
00:02:56,003 --> 00:02:58,299
Richard, you cannot tame a shark.

46
00:02:58,323 --> 00:03:00,379
No? No. What are you going to do?

47
00:03:00,403 --> 00:03:02,179
He eats someone, you tap him on the nose.

48
00:03:02,203 --> 00:03:05,203
He doesn't need someone
to throw him a cookie.

49
00:03:05,443 --> 00:03:07,579
Anyway, weather guy says
there's a warm front moving in.

50
00:03:07,603 --> 00:03:10,139
Plenty of sunshine; Maybe catch some rays?

51
00:03:10,163 --> 00:03:11,020
Yeah?

52
00:03:11,044 --> 00:03:14,043
I look like the kind of guy
who likes to catch some rays.

53
00:03:14,363 --> 00:03:17,779
My skin bypasses tan and
goes directly to sunstroke.

54
00:03:17,803 --> 00:03:19,579
I'll not get rich and it
lowers your blood pressure.

55
00:03:19,603 --> 00:03:22,003
Lift your mood and gives you vitamin D.

56
00:03:24,763 --> 00:03:27,459
Is this the way you saw
your career panning out?

57
00:03:27,483 --> 00:03:30,963
My first picture was Valley of the Dolls.
Oh, who were you in that?

58
00:03:31,283 --> 00:03:32,899
Ach, I'm in it for all
of forty-five seconds.

59
00:03:32,923 --> 00:03:35,923
There's one line. I'm just an extra really.

60
00:03:36,403 --> 00:03:37,459
What was your first one?

61
00:03:37,483 --> 00:03:39,379
Oh, a little Oscar winner

62
00:03:39,403 --> 00:03:42,563
you may have heard of called
The Curse of the Living Corpse.

63
00:03:42,603 --> 00:03:44,099
Oh, really?

64
00:03:44,123 --> 00:03:47,083
Yeah. Not exactly Shakespeare, huh?
No.

65
00:03:48,523 --> 00:03:50,299
You've done Shakespeare, right, Roy?

66
00:03:50,323 --> 00:03:54,043
Yeah, sure - Romeo and Juliet at
the New York Shakespeare Festival.

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00:03:54,603 --> 00:03:55,739
I was Mercutio.

68
00:03:55,763 --> 00:03:57,739
Yeah. I'm going to do Shakespeare someday.

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00:03:57,763 --> 00:04:00,763
I just haven't decided which
role I'd be best suited to.

70
00:04:01,003 --> 00:04:04,003
Hamlet or Prince Hal?

71
00:04:04,203 --> 00:04:07,203
Oh, hey, you know, Robert works
all the time with Harold Pinter.

72
00:04:07,323 --> 00:04:10,219
I'm going to get him to hook me up.

73
00:04:10,243 --> 00:04:12,619
Jesus, I never thought
I'd miss West Hollywood.

74
00:04:12,643 --> 00:04:15,883
I mean that's where I should be
instead of freezing my balls off here.

75
00:04:16,483 --> 00:04:19,483
But I guess the film
wouldn't work without me.

76
00:04:20,723 --> 00:04:22,059
Come again?

77
00:04:22,083 --> 00:04:25,163
Well, Hooper's the, the
brains of the operation,

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00:04:25,883 --> 00:04:28,219
the scientist, the rationalist.

79
00:04:28,243 --> 00:04:30,899
I mean, without him, there's no shark hunt!

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00:04:30,923 --> 00:04:31,740
No movie!

81
00:04:31,764 --> 00:04:33,539
Now, that's one way of looking at it.

82
00:04:33,563 --> 00:04:34,899
D'you read the book?

83
00:04:34,923 --> 00:04:37,219
Um, yeah. You did?

84
00:04:37,243 --> 00:04:39,763
They told me not to read
it, said it might confuse me.

85
00:04:41,803 --> 00:04:43,019
So what's it like?

86
00:04:43,043 --> 00:04:45,579
Well, it's no Great
Gatsby. Okay.

87
00:04:45,603 --> 00:04:46,580
But you know what they say.

88
00:04:46,604 --> 00:04:48,819
It's easier to make a good
movie out of a bad book

89
00:04:48,843 --> 00:04:49,723
than out of a great book.

90
00:04:49,803 --> 00:04:50,580
Is that so?

91
00:04:50,604 --> 00:04:53,299
Well, I don't know, but he, I mean, Steven.

92
00:04:53,323 --> 00:04:55,699
Well, he's changed a
lot of things for the script.

93
00:04:55,723 --> 00:04:58,579
Yeah?
Yeah, like, for example, in the book,

94
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Hooper is having an
affair with Brody's wife.

95
00:05:01,643 --> 00:05:03,499
He is?

96
00:05:03,523 --> 00:05:06,523
Damn!

97
00:05:07,563 --> 00:05:08,819
What do you think of Steven?

98
00:05:08,843 --> 00:05:12,643
Oh, well, first thing is, I think
people underestimate him.

99
00:05:12,923 --> 00:05:16,843
You know, he may just be a kid, but
he's an old head on young shoulders.

100
00:05:18,083 --> 00:05:20,299
Having said that, I think
he may be clinically insane!

101
00:05:20,323 --> 00:05:21,979
Really? Yeah.

102
00:05:22,003 --> 00:05:23,779
He's shooting on the ocean.

103
00:05:23,803 --> 00:05:25,539
Nobody shoots on the ocean!

104
00:05:25,563 --> 00:05:28,563
I mean, do you know how
many water tanks Universal has?

105
00:05:28,843 --> 00:05:31,339
I mean, you know what it's like
man, you work your butt off, you're

106
00:05:31,363 --> 00:05:35,299
- at the mercy of nature.
- Wind, rain, tides, sun -

107
00:05:35,323 --> 00:05:37,763
overexposure to all of them.

108
00:05:37,923 --> 00:05:40,619
Jews should stay away from water.

109
00:05:40,643 --> 00:05:43,379
Nothing good ever happened
to any Jew on the water.

110
00:05:43,403 --> 00:05:45,203
Didn't Jesus walk on water?

111
00:05:46,443 --> 00:05:47,380
Yeah!

112
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And look what happened to him.

113
00:05:50,243 --> 00:05:52,299
I mean, call me old fashioned,
but I think when you're making

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a four-million-dollar studio
picture, you should have a script.

115
00:05:55,883 --> 00:05:58,819
You know, it seems to me when
we talk about something over dinner

116
00:05:58,843 --> 00:06:01,579
and the next day it's in
the scene Gottlieb hands us!

117
00:06:01,603 --> 00:06:04,963
I mean, he can't make big-budget
Hollywood movies on the fly, man.

118
00:06:05,083 --> 00:06:08,763
One of the crew told me we are
already two million dollars over budget.

119
00:06:08,803 --> 00:06:10,099
Who told you that?

120
00:06:10,123 --> 00:06:13,099
Was it Tom? Sure sounds like it's true.

121
00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:15,499
And we still got all the
shark stuff left to shoot.

122
00:06:15,523 --> 00:06:18,459
If the fucking thing ever
starts working, that is.

123
00:06:18,483 --> 00:06:22,643
Otherwise, we're going to be in Planet
of the Apes without the monkeys, man!

124
00:06:23,283 --> 00:06:26,059
Hey, this is going to be such
a turkey, why did you sign up?

125
00:06:26,083 --> 00:06:29,083
Oh, I fucked up, is what happened.

126
00:06:29,323 --> 00:06:33,219
I shot this thing last year - The
Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz …

127
00:06:33,243 --> 00:06:37,459
Serious drama, and I thought
“This is it, baby, this is the big time.

128
00:06:37,483 --> 00:06:39,523
This is going to make you a star!”

129
00:06:40,883 --> 00:06:44,123
But I went to the premiere
up in Montreal, and,

130
00:06:44,443 --> 00:06:46,403
fuck, man, I stink in it.

131
00:06:47,723 --> 00:06:50,083
But I was the same
with American Graffiti.

132
00:06:50,803 --> 00:06:52,499
So I'm watching a rough cut, right?

133
00:06:52,523 --> 00:06:54,379
I go clammy cold.

134
00:06:54,403 --> 00:06:58,283
All of a sudden I'm seeing me...
I'm shaped like Smokey the Bear...

135
00:06:58,443 --> 00:07:03,683
and I've got this awful monotonal
nasal voice and I'm the worst, right?

136
00:07:04,323 --> 00:07:07,323
And George Lucas sees me
and says “What do you think?”

137
00:07:07,483 --> 00:07:10,899
And I say “Well, George, it's a nice
movie, and I've already figured out

138
00:07:10,923 --> 00:07:13,963
how you can cut me out.”
Lucas told me I was crazy.

139
00:07:14,923 --> 00:07:17,059
Oh, you were terrific. It's a great film.

140
00:07:17,083 --> 00:07:18,379
Hey, you know, when I signed Dick

141
00:07:18,403 --> 00:07:21,843
let slip that the studio wanted
Charlton Heston for Brody!

142
00:07:22,163 --> 00:07:24,939
Yeah? You know who they wanted for Hooper?

143
00:07:24,963 --> 00:07:25,963
Jon Voight!

144
00:07:26,243 --> 00:07:27,883
You know that big, blonde son of a bitch.

145
00:07:29,443 --> 00:07:30,699
How the hell they end up with us?

146
00:07:30,723 --> 00:07:33,723
I guess Steven doesn't like big stars.

147
00:07:35,083 --> 00:07:36,499
Doesn't like big stars?

148
00:07:36,523 --> 00:07:37,539
Why the hell not?

149
00:07:37,563 --> 00:07:39,739
I don't know, I guess
for reasons of realism.

150
00:07:39,763 --> 00:07:41,059
Oh, realism.

151
00:07:41,083 --> 00:07:43,339
They got a shark out
there the size of a truck.

152
00:07:43,363 --> 00:07:45,899
They're worried about realism?!
Well maybe it's a new kind of movie.

153
00:07:45,923 --> 00:07:48,499
I mean, you've seen
2001, right? Kubrick's film?

154
00:07:48,523 --> 00:07:49,739
No big names in that..

155
00:07:49,763 --> 00:07:52,763
Yeah, and that movie made
absolutely no sense whatsoever.

156
00:07:52,963 --> 00:07:56,003
Hey, you know Robert told me that
Kubrick offered him a leading role in it.

157
00:07:56,483 --> 00:07:59,059
Really? What, one of the astronauts?

158
00:07:59,083 --> 00:08:02,283
No. Actually he wanted
him to play the lead ape.

159
00:08:07,523 --> 00:08:08,300
Wait, really?

160
00:08:08,324 --> 00:08:11,323
Robert turned him down, said “You're
not going to make a monkey out of me!”

161
00:08:11,563 --> 00:08:14,563
Oh, man that is perfect casting!

162
00:08:15,043 --> 00:08:16,619
Shaw the ape-man.

163
00:08:16,643 --> 00:08:18,043
The Neanderthal!

164
00:08:18,803 --> 00:08:20,299
This fucking weather.

165
00:08:20,323 --> 00:08:21,979
Christ I hate this place.

166
00:08:22,003 --> 00:08:23,419
Fucking New England.

167
00:08:23,443 --> 00:08:25,699
People look at me like they've
never seen a Jew before.

168
00:08:25,723 --> 00:08:28,723
I'd say it's a distinct
possibility they haven't.

169
00:08:28,843 --> 00:08:30,259
I feel like I'm in the goddamn zoo.

170
00:08:30,283 --> 00:08:33,019
I'm out of place here,
man. This is not Queens.

171
00:08:33,043 --> 00:08:33,980
No, It's not.

172
00:08:34,004 --> 00:08:38,339
No, no, no, the people here are a
bunch of white, Protestant, Lutheran,

173
00:08:38,363 --> 00:08:42,403
stick-up-butt, bridge-playing,
clam-chowder-eating, shitheads!

174
00:08:42,723 --> 00:08:43,660
Ladies.

175
00:08:43,684 --> 00:08:46,099
You sick of that clam chowder too?

176
00:08:46,123 --> 00:08:48,019
Oh God, yes! How long
have we been shooting?

177
00:08:48,043 --> 00:08:49,299
Seven weeks? Eight!

178
00:08:49,323 --> 00:08:52,179
Oh, I get away from here,
I'm not touching seafood

179
00:08:52,203 --> 00:08:53,499
for the next twenty years, man.

180
00:08:53,523 --> 00:08:55,539
Christ, what I wouldn't
go for a simple plate

181
00:08:55,563 --> 00:08:57,043
of devil led kidneys on toast.

182
00:08:57,683 --> 00:09:00,619
I've no idea what the fuck
that is, but it sounds disgusting.

183
00:09:00,643 --> 00:09:02,419
You're a philistine boy.

184
00:09:02,443 --> 00:09:04,459
Did you have any trouble
getting to set, Robert?

185
00:09:04,483 --> 00:09:07,899
My driver took me via the
Edgartown Vineyard Haven Road, but

186
00:09:07,923 --> 00:09:10,659
the traffic was terrible so we dropped down

187
00:09:10,683 --> 00:09:12,603
to the Edgartown West Tisbury Road...

188
00:09:12,803 --> 00:09:13,260
Roy stop!

189
00:09:13,284 --> 00:09:16,283
You're talking know,
talking about roads again!

190
00:09:16,363 --> 00:09:18,139
If I have any trouble
getting to sleep tonight

191
00:09:18,163 --> 00:09:20,979
you can come over to
mine and tell me all about it.

192
00:09:21,003 --> 00:09:22,619
What are you reading? Damon Runyon.

193
00:09:22,643 --> 00:09:23,340
Who's that?

194
00:09:23,364 --> 00:09:26,363
Christ, the lights are on,
but there's nobody home.

195
00:09:26,803 --> 00:09:29,779
One of your compatriots, but far superior.

196
00:09:29,803 --> 00:09:32,139
Richard, you must have
heard of Damon Runyon.

197
00:09:32,163 --> 00:09:35,019
Well, must I? I mean, you can't expect me
to know everything.

198
00:09:35,043 --> 00:09:37,643
I think our mistake is
expecting you to know anything.

199
00:09:38,003 --> 00:09:41,883
So, Roy, what does The Times
have to say about Nixon today?

200
00:09:42,843 --> 00:09:44,259
“Almost forgotten, by the time

201
00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:48,539
Mr. Nixon tendered his
resignation, were his days of glory

202
00:09:48,563 --> 00:09:51,739
only two years ago, when he
began dismantling the cold war

203
00:09:51,763 --> 00:09:55,123
that had dominated American
politics for a quarter century,

204
00:09:55,323 --> 00:09:58,539
with his dramatic journeys to
Peking and Moscow and the signing

205
00:09:58,563 --> 00:10:01,563
of the first limitation on the
deadly nuclear arms race.

206
00:10:01,603 --> 00:10:06,019
Almost forgotten were his successes
in ending American involvement

207
00:10:06,043 --> 00:10:09,523
in the bitterly divisive Vietnam
War and in halting the draft.

208
00:10:09,923 --> 00:10:11,859
Gone was the sweeping mandate

209
00:10:11,883 --> 00:10:16,243
Mr. Nixon had won from the
American electorate in November, 1972,

210
00:10:16,403 --> 00:10:18,579
when he carried forty-nine states

211
00:10:18,603 --> 00:10:21,339
(all but Massachusetts
plus the District of Columbia)

212
00:10:21,363 --> 00:10:25,603
- With the help of what he
liked to call 'The silent majority' -

213
00:10:25,803 --> 00:10:30,043
the middle-class Americans of the
suburbs and small towns and farms.

214
00:10:30,523 --> 00:10:33,523
Gone were the dreams
of an historic realignment

215
00:10:33,683 --> 00:10:36,979
that would make the Republicans
the majority party by stripping

216
00:10:37,003 --> 00:10:41,059
blue-collar workers and Southerners
from Franklin D. Roosevelt's coalition.”

217
00:10:41,083 --> 00:10:42,539
I am not a crook!

218
00:10:42,563 --> 00:10:44,539
Jesus, they makes him sound like a saint.

219
00:10:44,563 --> 00:10:45,619
Fuck him!

220
00:10:45,643 --> 00:10:49,363
The man appalls me, but I can't help
feeling some curious sort of pity for him.

221
00:10:50,003 --> 00:10:52,539
You pity him? Why?
I think he hates himself.

222
00:10:52,563 --> 00:10:54,299
What a president! Christ!

223
00:10:54,323 --> 00:10:55,819
The only thing to be said for all this...

224
00:10:55,843 --> 00:10:59,563
there will never be a more
immoral president than Tricky Dicky.

225
00:11:02,443 --> 00:11:05,443
Hey, you know you know
who kind of looks like Nixon?

226
00:11:05,523 --> 00:11:07,299
Murray.

227
00:11:07,323 --> 00:11:08,899
He does!

228
00:11:08,923 --> 00:11:11,923
I wonder if that's why
Steven cast him as the mayor?

229
00:11:12,643 --> 00:11:14,619
Hey, do you know what they're doing to it?

230
00:11:14,643 --> 00:11:18,499
According to the lad Joyner, the
damn fool contraption has salt water

231
00:11:18,523 --> 00:11:19,380
in its workings.

232
00:11:19,404 --> 00:11:22,923
It's going to take at least an hour to
hoist it out of the brine and drain it.

233
00:11:22,963 --> 00:11:25,699
I think we may have
underestimated the power of the sea.

234
00:11:25,723 --> 00:11:28,723
Yes lads - we have angered Neptune.

235
00:11:28,923 --> 00:11:30,499
Oh, I think you mean Poseidon.

236
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,379
Christ, what did they teach you at school?

237
00:11:32,403 --> 00:11:34,619
They're the same bloody god!

238
00:11:34,643 --> 00:11:37,139
Oh, shit. I knew that.

239
00:11:37,163 --> 00:11:38,179
What, you think I'm an idiot?

240
00:11:38,203 --> 00:11:40,163
I presume that's a rhetorical question.

241
00:11:41,323 --> 00:11:46,619
Oh by the way, Robert, have you seen the
latest version of the Indianapolis speech.

242
00:11:46,643 --> 00:11:49,043
D'you read it? Uhhh, yeah. Get off!

243
00:11:53,403 --> 00:11:54,300
By Christ,

244
00:11:54,324 --> 00:11:57,323
there's some stinky writing here!

245
00:11:57,403 --> 00:11:58,819
And it's five pages long!

246
00:11:58,843 --> 00:12:00,219
We're not doing a bloody play!

247
00:12:00,243 --> 00:12:02,339
I'm not sure even
Olivier could make it work!

248
00:12:02,363 --> 00:12:03,499
I think they might have to cut it.

249
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:05,299
They can't cut it - it's
the heart of the film.

250
00:12:05,323 --> 00:12:07,523
It explains why Quint's a fucking maniac.

251
00:12:08,003 --> 00:12:08,380
Listen...

252
00:12:08,404 --> 00:12:11,403
I just wanted to tell you how
much I loved your Claudius.

253
00:12:12,963 --> 00:12:15,003
You were the best Claudius I've ever seen.

254
00:12:17,803 --> 00:12:20,803
Do you think I could do Shakespeare?

255
00:12:20,923 --> 00:12:21,923
No.

256
00:12:23,403 --> 00:12:24,859
Are you going to be here
for the rest of our lives?

257
00:12:24,883 --> 00:12:27,299
I hope to God not! What
a godforsaken place.

258
00:12:27,323 --> 00:12:29,699
Have either of you noticed
certain facial features

259
00:12:29,723 --> 00:12:31,699
keep cropping up with
the locals round here?

260
00:12:31,723 --> 00:12:34,723
There's a nose and a jawline
that I keep seeing again and again.

261
00:12:34,883 --> 00:12:35,780
Now, you mentioned it...

262
00:12:35,804 --> 00:12:38,379
I don't suppose there's much
else to do here in the winter months.

263
00:12:38,403 --> 00:12:40,443
Might as well cuddle up with your sister.

264
00:12:44,083 --> 00:12:44,740
Hey, did you

265
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:48,379
know that Bob built the squid for
20,000 Leagues Under The Sea?

266
00:12:48,403 --> 00:12:49,020
Did he now?

267
00:12:49,044 --> 00:12:50,939
The technicians are bloody wonderful.

268
00:12:50,963 --> 00:12:53,179
We should have shot it in a goddamn tank!

269
00:12:53,203 --> 00:12:55,059
It's gruelling and pointless!

270
00:12:55,083 --> 00:12:56,683
It wouldn't look the same in a tank.

271
00:12:57,123 --> 00:13:00,299
The story's important,
the shark's important,

272
00:13:00,323 --> 00:13:01,883
but the sea is crucial.

273
00:13:03,403 --> 00:13:06,403
I wouldn't have taken the job if
we were shooting in a bloody tank.

274
00:13:06,963 --> 00:13:08,003
Okay.

275
00:13:08,843 --> 00:13:11,539
You think you're working too hard, do you?

276
00:13:11,563 --> 00:13:13,099
You think you're overstretched?

277
00:13:13,123 --> 00:13:15,619
You Beverly Hills milk puff!

278
00:13:15,643 --> 00:13:16,460
Well, do you?

279
00:13:16,484 --> 00:13:18,979
I think I'm pretty much
busting my balls, yes.

280
00:13:19,003 --> 00:13:19,580
Good god!

281
00:13:19,604 --> 00:13:22,579
When they call wrap and take us
in speedboats back to the local bar

282
00:13:22,603 --> 00:13:25,179
and you drape yourself in a
blonde or - what was it last night?

283
00:13:25,203 --> 00:13:27,563
A brunette - what do you
think the crew are doing?

284
00:13:28,483 --> 00:13:30,979
Those poor bastards have been
freezing their arses off in the water

285
00:13:31,003 --> 00:13:33,739
half the time, and then they have
to clean and maintain the cameras,

286
00:13:33,763 --> 00:13:37,339
reweld, repatch, and all
the other lugging, striking,

287
00:13:37,363 --> 00:13:40,683
and general shit that we never see -
why do you think we're first at the bar?

288
00:13:41,323 --> 00:13:45,179
Mike has to balance the camera
on his shoulders and flex his legs

289
00:13:45,203 --> 00:13:46,499
to keep the dancing horizon

290
00:13:46,523 --> 00:13:49,763
steady in shot - do you know
how physically demanding that is?

291
00:13:50,283 --> 00:13:53,603
If you punched his torso, you'd
break your little TV actor's hand.

292
00:13:54,283 --> 00:13:57,579
The divers' fingers are cut
to pieces by the barnacles -

293
00:13:57,603 --> 00:14:01,139
and you sit there whining
like a fucking baby!

294
00:14:01,163 --> 00:14:03,883
Jesus, you are a vindictive
motherfucker you know that?

295
00:14:03,923 --> 00:14:07,219
Fellas, if we really are going to
be here for the rest of our lives,

296
00:14:07,243 --> 00:14:08,899
let's try to make the best of it.

297
00:14:08,923 --> 00:14:11,923
It'll be worth it in the end, I suppose.

298
00:14:12,203 --> 00:14:14,443
What, you think this is going to be a hit?

299
00:14:14,523 --> 00:14:18,643
Best films I've been in have made no
money, and the worst have made a fortune.

300
00:14:18,803 --> 00:14:21,059
And which category do we fit into?

301
00:14:21,083 --> 00:14:22,283
Well, let me put it like this.

302
00:14:23,403 --> 00:14:27,043
I offered my whole salary plus the overage

303
00:14:27,603 --> 00:14:30,379
for a percentage of the profits.

304
00:14:30,403 --> 00:14:32,419
Zanuck and Brown turned me down.

305
00:14:32,443 --> 00:14:34,939
So it'll be terrible but make a bundle.

306
00:14:34,963 --> 00:14:36,523
What do you think?

307
00:14:37,003 --> 00:14:39,643
Do you imagine it's going
to be a second Citizen Kane?

308
00:14:40,043 --> 00:14:41,963
Bread and circuses, chums.

309
00:14:42,723 --> 00:14:43,700
I pray this is

310
00:14:43,724 --> 00:14:46,339
as simpleminded as
Hollywood films ever get.

311
00:14:46,363 --> 00:14:48,019
Cinema for “the people” then?

312
00:14:48,043 --> 00:14:50,523
The lowest common denominator, Roy.

313
00:14:51,683 --> 00:14:52,923
Interesting...

314
00:14:54,523 --> 00:14:55,523
What?

315
00:14:56,123 --> 00:14:58,259
Well, I'd heard that
you were a “socialist”?

316
00:14:58,283 --> 00:14:59,260
What did you say?

317
00:14:59,284 --> 00:15:00,979
Well, I'd be interested to learn

318
00:15:01,003 --> 00:15:04,883
how you square your left wing principles
with the large sums of money you make.

319
00:15:05,283 --> 00:15:08,699
I mean, presumably you donate
your entire wages to the workers.

320
00:15:08,723 --> 00:15:11,219
You little turd, in England
they tax you ninety percent!

321
00:15:11,243 --> 00:15:14,203
Oh, so that's why you live in Ireland!

322
00:15:16,243 --> 00:15:17,243
Oh.

323
00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:24,363
An apple a day...

324
00:15:25,083 --> 00:15:26,299
What?

325
00:15:26,323 --> 00:15:27,419
Keeps the doctor away.

326
00:15:27,443 --> 00:15:29,563
That's what they used to say, boy.

327
00:15:29,883 --> 00:15:32,243
You could do with a few of these, you know.

328
00:15:32,403 --> 00:15:33,300
And some exercise.

329
00:15:33,324 --> 00:15:35,619
You're in terrible shape for a
man your age. It's a tragedy.

330
00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:36,460
Now, wait a minute!

331
00:15:36,484 --> 00:15:38,859
A little man like you can't
carry that amount of fat.

332
00:15:38,883 --> 00:15:39,540
What?

333
00:15:39,564 --> 00:15:40,883
You're a disgrace!

334
00:15:41,163 --> 00:15:43,019
I bet you couldn't even do ten press-ups.

335
00:15:43,043 --> 00:15:44,299
What is this, West Point?

336
00:15:44,323 --> 00:15:45,523
Or even five!

337
00:15:46,803 --> 00:15:49,099
I'll give you a hundred dollars right now

338
00:15:49,123 --> 00:15:51,123
if you can do five press-ups.

339
00:15:53,923 --> 00:15:56,083
A hundred dollars?

340
00:15:58,083 --> 00:15:58,603
Alright!

341
00:15:58,803 --> 00:15:59,420
Richard...

342
00:15:59,444 --> 00:16:02,443
No no no no no no no, if he wants
press-ups I'll give him press ups.

343
00:16:02,803 --> 00:16:04,579
And they're called push-ups.

344
00:16:04,603 --> 00:16:05,540
Go on then, we're waiting!

345
00:16:05,564 --> 00:16:07,603
Okay. One! Back straight. No cheating!

346
00:16:08,443 --> 00:16:08,963
Two!

347
00:16:09,243 --> 00:16:11,299
D'you know how much money I
have to make to look after my family?

348
00:16:11,323 --> 00:16:11,980
Three!

349
00:16:12,004 --> 00:16:16,003
A simple trip to McDonald's restaurant
in Los Angeles cost me fifty dollars!

350
00:16:16,243 --> 00:16:19,003
And then there's school fees... Four!

351
00:16:19,963 --> 00:16:20,963
Damn!

352
00:16:21,843 --> 00:16:22,660
Wait wait wait.

353
00:16:22,684 --> 00:16:24,579
Fifty dollars in McDonald's?

354
00:16:24,603 --> 00:16:25,619
How many kids you got?

355
00:16:25,643 --> 00:16:27,403
Nine... so far.

356
00:16:28,363 --> 00:16:29,539
You're going to need a bigger boat!

357
00:16:29,563 --> 00:16:31,043
Oh, Jesus...

358
00:16:32,083 --> 00:16:34,363
Sorry guys, I really love that line.

359
00:16:34,963 --> 00:16:36,259
Did you make that line up?

360
00:16:36,283 --> 00:16:39,419
I don't know, Steven yelled it out
before he called action, but I nailed it.

361
00:16:39,443 --> 00:16:42,419
Whoopty-do. You have nine children?

362
00:16:42,443 --> 00:16:45,299
You know, they sell prophylactics
at any reputable drug store.

363
00:16:45,323 --> 00:16:46,323
Hahaha!

364
00:16:47,883 --> 00:16:49,443
How about you, Roy?

365
00:16:49,683 --> 00:16:51,939
No, just one. A little girl.

366
00:16:51,963 --> 00:16:53,499
Hey, any of yours want to be actors?

367
00:16:53,523 --> 00:16:55,603
Christ, I hope not!

368
00:16:56,283 --> 00:16:58,419
It's a shriveling profession, isn't it?

369
00:16:58,443 --> 00:16:59,619
Brutal for women.

370
00:16:59,643 --> 00:17:01,379
There are worse jobs. You know what I mean.

371
00:17:01,403 --> 00:17:03,019
It's no job for a grown up.

372
00:17:03,043 --> 00:17:04,579
Actors are children, aren't they?

373
00:17:04,603 --> 00:17:06,363
Present company accepted...

374
00:17:07,003 --> 00:17:08,483
partially accepted.

375
00:17:10,323 --> 00:17:13,619
So, what's your idea of
a “grown-up” occupation?

376
00:17:13,643 --> 00:17:15,499
I mean, should we all join the army?

377
00:17:15,523 --> 00:17:18,523
Oh Jesus, no no no no no, count me out.

378
00:17:19,003 --> 00:17:21,323
No, that shit is not for me.

379
00:17:21,603 --> 00:17:23,539
No, they didn't get me in 'Nam.

380
00:17:23,563 --> 00:17:27,259
I was a “conscientious objector.”
I worked at a hospital in LA.

381
00:17:27,283 --> 00:17:28,060
Hahaha!

382
00:17:28,084 --> 00:17:29,899
Hey, it was plenty
dangerous at that hospital!

383
00:17:29,923 --> 00:17:33,043
Yes. I'm certain you stubbed
your toe on more than one occasion!

384
00:17:33,083 --> 00:17:34,619
Screw you man!

385
00:17:34,643 --> 00:17:37,219
What, I have to apologise
because I didn't put on a uniform

386
00:17:37,243 --> 00:17:38,299
and go about killing people?

387
00:17:38,323 --> 00:17:40,779
No one's asking you to
apologise for anything, Richard.

388
00:17:40,803 --> 00:17:43,283
Yeah well, I got morals, principles.

389
00:17:43,883 --> 00:17:46,259
“Give peace a chance!” That's what I say.

390
00:17:46,283 --> 00:17:49,283
Nonviolence - talk things over.

391
00:17:49,443 --> 00:17:53,859
Hell, if Nixon and Kissinger
and Brezhnev and Min and Mao

392
00:17:53,883 --> 00:17:57,803
all got together and smoked a little
weed, all our problems would be solved!

393
00:17:57,843 --> 00:17:59,259
How profound.

394
00:17:59,283 --> 00:18:00,683
You sound like a village idiot!

395
00:18:02,723 --> 00:18:05,203
I get what you're saying
Rich, but you know,

396
00:18:05,763 --> 00:18:08,139
god knows 'Nam is 'Nam, but don't

397
00:18:08,163 --> 00:18:13,363
you think sometimes you have to fight -
maybe even die - for what you believe in?

398
00:18:14,763 --> 00:18:17,099
I think I'm going to be sick.

399
00:18:17,123 --> 00:18:18,899
That's something of an overreaction.

400
00:18:18,923 --> 00:18:20,539
Hasn't got his sea legs yet!

401
00:18:20,563 --> 00:18:23,219
You know, he adores you. He adores himself.

402
00:18:23,243 --> 00:18:27,523
No, he does, he's very keen for
you to introduce him to Harold Pinter.

403
00:18:27,763 --> 00:18:31,843
Good God, what a car crash that would be.

404
00:18:31,923 --> 00:18:34,699
I heard he's quite a character.
He'd eat Richard alive.

405
00:18:34,723 --> 00:18:37,763
All that would be left
would be a pile of bones.

406
00:18:37,923 --> 00:18:40,499
I'm okay. False alarm!

407
00:18:40,523 --> 00:18:41,859
Jesus!

408
00:18:41,883 --> 00:18:45,259
Two weeks, I can't get rid of the
stink of that rotting fish out of my nose.

409
00:18:45,283 --> 00:18:48,883
Oh, that shark was ripe when it
came out the box and it only got worse.

410
00:18:48,923 --> 00:18:51,179
It makes sense, so - I
looked this up, it's fascinating.

411
00:18:51,203 --> 00:18:52,043
Here we go...

412
00:18:52,203 --> 00:18:56,723
Sharks are one of the quickest species
to decompose because they're so primitive

413
00:18:56,923 --> 00:19:00,083
-they're, like, four
hundred million years old.

414
00:19:00,123 --> 00:19:01,523
They're older than trees!

415
00:19:02,043 --> 00:19:04,579
No skeletons, just cartilage.

416
00:19:04,603 --> 00:19:05,979
Sharks don't have skeletons?

417
00:19:06,003 --> 00:19:07,219
Nobody told me this.

418
00:19:07,243 --> 00:19:10,499
Oh. Get this: Sharks have
survived five mass extinction events.

419
00:19:10,523 --> 00:19:13,219
Five?! Yeah, scientists figured
there's going to be another one.

420
00:19:13,243 --> 00:19:14,419
It's something to do with the weather.

421
00:19:14,443 --> 00:19:15,739
You know, things will get real hot.

422
00:19:15,763 --> 00:19:18,403
Humans will die. Mammals. But sharks...

423
00:19:19,563 --> 00:19:22,563
they're just going to
keep on swimming around.

424
00:19:22,723 --> 00:19:25,179
Hell, they might even
become the dominant species.

425
00:19:25,203 --> 00:19:28,723
If this film survives, perhaps it
will be watched by sharks one day.

426
00:19:28,883 --> 00:19:32,939
Yeah - but to them, it'll
be a tragedy about a mild

427
00:19:32,963 --> 00:19:37,283
mannered shark just going
about his day, eating a few people

428
00:19:37,443 --> 00:19:40,443
who get senselessly
murdered by three assholes!

429
00:19:41,323 --> 00:19:43,923
...two sharks leaving the
cinema, one says to the other.

430
00:19:44,123 --> 00:19:47,323
“Well, I quite liked it,
apart from the ending.”

431
00:19:47,523 --> 00:19:49,579
I guess it puts it all
into perspective, right?

432
00:19:49,603 --> 00:19:51,899
The human race will cease to exist someday

433
00:19:51,923 --> 00:19:55,003
and here we are worrying
about a stupid movie.

434
00:19:55,123 --> 00:19:59,443
Hey, don't knock this “stupid movie.”
This is going to make us famous.

435
00:20:02,603 --> 00:20:04,243
Is that why you're doing this?

436
00:20:06,563 --> 00:20:07,643
Well,

437
00:20:07,963 --> 00:20:08,939
who doesn't want to be a movie star?

438
00:20:08,963 --> 00:20:09,820
Speak for yourself.

439
00:20:09,844 --> 00:20:12,403
I'd rather be known for my writing. Jesus!

440
00:20:14,563 --> 00:20:15,899
The problem with the acting profession

441
00:20:15,923 --> 00:20:19,403
these days is that every little
pissant wants to be a movie star, but

442
00:20:19,803 --> 00:20:23,443
nobody wants to play a Wednesday
matinee at the Stockton-on-Tees Forum!

443
00:20:24,803 --> 00:20:26,739
I had this bellboy come
up to me the other day

444
00:20:26,763 --> 00:20:29,339
who told me he'd love to be famous like me.

445
00:20:29,363 --> 00:20:31,099
He got it the wrong way round.

446
00:20:31,123 --> 00:20:32,779
Fame is the by-product.

447
00:20:32,803 --> 00:20:34,379
It is the shit of art!

448
00:20:34,403 --> 00:20:37,299
Okay, man, okay, calm down!

449
00:20:37,323 --> 00:20:39,499
Christ!

450
00:20:39,523 --> 00:20:41,363
I'm an artist, okay,

451
00:20:42,483 --> 00:20:45,203
I want to make art.

452
00:20:46,923 --> 00:20:48,259
If I happen

453
00:20:48,283 --> 00:20:51,259
to make a million bucks,
get blown a hell of a lot,

454
00:20:51,283 --> 00:20:55,003
maybe make the cover of Time magazine
along the way, then where's the harm?

455
00:20:56,083 --> 00:20:57,699
You think Shakespeare didn't get blown?

456
00:20:57,723 --> 00:20:58,580
Sure he did!

457
00:20:58,604 --> 00:21:01,019
Put your money where
your mouth is, for god's sake!

458
00:21:01,043 --> 00:21:02,979
There are plenty of
theatres in this country!

459
00:21:03,003 --> 00:21:07,523
Yeah, well, that's what I'd love to
do… Oh, you know Harold Pinter, right?

460
00:21:08,563 --> 00:21:11,803
Mr. Pinter and I have worked
together on a number of occasions, yes.

461
00:21:11,843 --> 00:21:14,219
What's he like?
He is a great man.

462
00:21:14,243 --> 00:21:16,099
He's also an accomplished sprinter.

463
00:21:16,123 --> 00:21:17,699
He used to sprint for his county.

464
00:21:17,723 --> 00:21:20,299
Pinter the sprinter.

465
00:21:20,323 --> 00:21:22,219
Well done, Roy!

466
00:21:22,243 --> 00:21:25,219
So do you think that you could,
you know, put in a good word for me?

467
00:21:25,243 --> 00:21:27,739
I'd love to do some serious
theatre work in some of his stuff -

468
00:21:27,763 --> 00:21:30,763
on Broadway or London even.

469
00:21:31,403 --> 00:21:33,139
Do you think you could do that?

470
00:21:33,163 --> 00:21:34,259
Alright!

471
00:21:34,283 --> 00:21:37,179
If you're deadly serious,
I'll give you his number.

472
00:21:37,203 --> 00:21:38,739
Come on! Don't fuck it up.

473
00:21:38,763 --> 00:21:42,283
Pinter is actually a very
friendly man, Richard.

474
00:21:42,523 --> 00:21:46,699
There's nothing he enjoys more than
chatting to people who appreciate his work.

475
00:21:46,723 --> 00:21:51,803
Just call him up - he's an early
riser by the way - say “Harold” -

476
00:21:51,843 --> 00:21:54,923
make sure you use his first
name, he cannot bear formality -

477
00:21:55,523 --> 00:21:57,539
“Harold, let's work together!”
Yeah?

478
00:21:57,563 --> 00:21:58,659
Oh yes!

479
00:21:58,683 --> 00:21:59,620
The other thing he loves is

480
00:21:59,644 --> 00:22:02,819
when people come up with theories
as to what his plays are about.

481
00:22:02,843 --> 00:22:04,739
He gets a tremendous kick out of that.

482
00:22:04,763 --> 00:22:05,340
Ooh, that's great

483
00:22:05,364 --> 00:22:09,363
because I've got one of those from,
what's it called, The Dumb Waiter,

484
00:22:10,603 --> 00:22:12,619
they're dead, right?

485
00:22:12,643 --> 00:22:14,819
And they're in hell.
Oh, that's very good.

486
00:22:14,843 --> 00:22:16,099
He won't have heard that one before.

487
00:22:16,123 --> 00:22:19,523
That's so good, I got so much more I can
talk about with that play in particular...

488
00:22:20,843 --> 00:22:21,843
Just a moment.

489
00:22:24,643 --> 00:22:26,043
Robert? Yes.

490
00:22:26,523 --> 00:22:28,619
Do you ever think you're too hard on him?

491
00:22:28,643 --> 00:22:32,883
It is the grit in the oyster
that produces the pearl, Roy.

492
00:22:33,643 --> 00:22:35,659
I am that grit.

493
00:22:35,683 --> 00:22:38,179
He's giving a better
performance because of me.

494
00:22:38,203 --> 00:22:40,379
Oh, so that's why you're doing it?

495
00:22:40,403 --> 00:22:43,083
Making his life hell - to
improve his performance?

496
00:22:43,163 --> 00:22:44,979
Of course.

497
00:22:45,003 --> 00:22:45,740
What?

498
00:22:45,764 --> 00:22:48,763
Nothing - it's just I'm
not sure that's what it is.

499
00:22:48,803 --> 00:22:49,899
You're not going to believe this.

500
00:22:49,923 --> 00:22:54,083
So they get the replacement
shark, they strap it to the rig,

501
00:22:54,363 --> 00:22:59,859
they take it underwater, they bring it
back up, it's got a huge dent in its chin.

502
00:22:59,883 --> 00:23:01,803
Fucking thing looks like Kirk Douglas.

503
00:23:03,203 --> 00:23:04,459
So? So they got to

504
00:23:04,483 --> 00:23:07,459
take it back to base and hammer
the goddamn dent out of it.

505
00:23:07,483 --> 00:23:09,899
Ah shit. Now, Jim says we
might as well call it a day.

506
00:23:09,923 --> 00:23:11,939
The fog's moved in anyway. Sorry guys.

507
00:23:11,963 --> 00:23:13,659
Jesus!
I know. What a waste of time.

508
00:23:13,683 --> 00:23:16,139
FUCKING CHRIST! Easy, Robert.

509
00:23:16,163 --> 00:23:18,299
My fucking visa is running
out, for Christ's sake!

510
00:23:18,323 --> 00:23:22,019
I've got what - two or three days
left before they tax the shit out of me!

511
00:23:22,043 --> 00:23:27,099
I'll owe the fucking IRS for the
fucking Sting and Pelham 123!

512
00:23:27,123 --> 00:23:31,243
I already spend every spare
day in Canada or bloody Bermuda!

513
00:23:31,283 --> 00:23:35,763
Hey, come on, we'll go back to the hotel
bar, have ourselves a steak, have a drink.

514
00:23:36,243 --> 00:23:38,419
Maybe have some more
of that clam chowder, huh?

515
00:23:38,443 --> 00:23:40,123
Great! Be with you in a moment.

516
00:24:29,723 --> 00:24:32,579
That was quite a performance
you gave earlier today, Richard,

517
00:24:32,603 --> 00:24:34,363
throwing up between takes.

518
00:24:34,843 --> 00:24:35,963
Oh god...

519
00:24:38,203 --> 00:24:39,979
What's in the paper today, then, Roy?

520
00:24:40,003 --> 00:24:41,419
You mean aside from Nixon?

521
00:24:41,443 --> 00:24:46,619
War, disease, famine, bombs,
terrorists, riots, religious maniacs.

522
00:24:46,643 --> 00:24:47,460
You know, the usual.

523
00:24:47,484 --> 00:24:49,819
What a wonderful world...

524
00:24:49,843 --> 00:24:52,843
Thar she blows.

525
00:24:54,723 --> 00:24:56,259
So what are your plans today, Roy,

526
00:24:56,283 --> 00:24:59,763
in the extremely likely event that
don't get that bloody shark operational?

527
00:24:59,923 --> 00:25:02,779
Oh you know, I'll go over my
lines for the scar scene, not that

528
00:25:02,803 --> 00:25:06,979
there are that many then if it warms up,
go out on deck, maybe catch a few rays.

529
00:25:07,003 --> 00:25:07,700
Again?

530
00:25:07,724 --> 00:25:09,979
Good God.
You were out there all day yesterday, man.

531
00:25:10,003 --> 00:25:11,139
It's pathological!

532
00:25:11,163 --> 00:25:12,140
No, you should try it.

533
00:25:12,164 --> 00:25:15,019
I can think of better things
to do than gaze at my navel.

534
00:25:15,043 --> 00:25:18,043
I really think there's a
spiritual element to it.

535
00:25:18,163 --> 00:25:22,403
Sitting there, soaking in the heat,
listening to the ocean, the birds,

536
00:25:23,083 --> 00:25:26,563
letting your mind breathe,
it's almost like meditating.

537
00:25:26,643 --> 00:25:28,979
You're beginning to sound
like our resident beatnik.

538
00:25:29,003 --> 00:25:30,243
Sunshine is healthy.

539
00:25:32,203 --> 00:25:33,020
You know,

540
00:25:33,044 --> 00:25:36,259
I wasn't going to say anything,
Roy, but has it occurred to you

541
00:25:36,283 --> 00:25:39,283
that you're much browner now than
you were at the beginning of the shoot?

542
00:25:40,603 --> 00:25:42,819
I mean, what are you going
to do if they need pick-ups?

543
00:25:42,843 --> 00:25:44,859
They can do anything in
post-production these days.

544
00:25:44,883 --> 00:25:47,099
Shame they can't fix my speech.

545
00:25:47,123 --> 00:25:48,739
Come on, let's bid.

546
00:25:48,763 --> 00:25:50,723
Three. Two.

547
00:25:50,923 --> 00:25:53,459
I will also say two, you pussies.
Can't say two.

548
00:25:53,483 --> 00:25:54,100
Why not?

549
00:25:54,124 --> 00:25:55,819
It can't add up. I explained this!

550
00:25:55,843 --> 00:25:57,659
Somebody has to suffer.

551
00:25:57,683 --> 00:25:59,579
Why does somebody always have to suffer?

552
00:25:59,603 --> 00:26:02,603
It's the law of the universe.

553
00:26:02,843 --> 00:26:06,443
Alright, fuck it, three.

554
00:26:15,803 --> 00:26:17,459
Hold on, hold on.

555
00:26:17,483 --> 00:26:19,299
The first time I played the ace of clubs,

556
00:26:19,323 --> 00:26:20,979
and then you trumped
it with the two of hearts.

557
00:26:21,003 --> 00:26:22,459
Now you've just played a club.

558
00:26:22,483 --> 00:26:25,019
So?
You have to follow suit, you arsehole!

559
00:26:25,043 --> 00:26:27,019
Oh shit, I forgot, I'm sorry!

560
00:26:27,043 --> 00:26:28,539
I would've won that, you know...

561
00:26:28,563 --> 00:26:31,163
YES, YES, YES! I would've won...

562
00:26:49,483 --> 00:26:50,963
Lighting!

563
00:26:53,483 --> 00:26:54,843
Overhead.

564
00:26:55,483 --> 00:26:57,083
Okay: Quiet please!

565
00:26:57,403 --> 00:26:59,123
Rehearsing...

566
00:26:59,443 --> 00:27:00,819
whenever you're ready, gentlemen.

567
00:27:00,843 --> 00:27:03,979
“That was the USS Indianapolis, Mr. Hooper.

568
00:27:04,003 --> 00:27:05,123
You've heard of that, right?

569
00:27:05,963 --> 00:27:07,579
Well, I was there.

570
00:27:07,603 --> 00:27:10,139
Let me tell you about the USS Indianapolis.

571
00:27:10,163 --> 00:27:12,699
It was 1945, Chief.

572
00:27:12,723 --> 00:27:15,739
The Pacific was filled
with Japanese submarines.

573
00:27:15,763 --> 00:27:17,419
They were everywhere.

574
00:27:17,443 --> 00:27:20,803
We'd just left the island of
Tinian, a lovely place, Chief.”

575
00:27:22,443 --> 00:27:23,420
Oh for God's sake.

576
00:27:23,444 --> 00:27:24,459
I can't say this!

577
00:27:24,483 --> 00:27:26,939
It's duller than my tax return.

578
00:27:26,963 --> 00:27:29,619
I mean, listen to this: “In
the middle of the second day,

579
00:27:29,643 --> 00:27:32,259
some of us started to
go crazy from the thirst.

580
00:27:32,283 --> 00:27:36,283
One fella cried out he saw a river,
another claimed he saw a waterfall,

581
00:27:36,523 --> 00:27:40,179
some started to drink the ocean
and choked on it, and some left

582
00:27:40,203 --> 00:27:41,579
our little group squares

583
00:27:41,603 --> 00:27:45,619
and swam off alone lookin' for islands
and the sharks took them right away.

584
00:27:45,643 --> 00:27:47,139
It was mainly the young fellas

585
00:27:47,163 --> 00:27:50,163
that did that - the older
ones stayed where they was.”

586
00:27:52,003 --> 00:27:52,860
For fuck's sake!

587
00:27:52,884 --> 00:27:55,379
It goes on for FOUR pages like this!

588
00:27:55,403 --> 00:27:57,739
All right, Robert, we'll
give it back to John.

589
00:27:57,763 --> 00:27:59,763
No, no, no, don't give it back to Milius!

590
00:28:00,563 --> 00:28:02,763
I'd like to take a crack at it.

591
00:28:02,923 --> 00:28:05,259
Let me take it away
and I'll write it myself.

592
00:28:05,283 --> 00:28:06,939
Okay, Robert, take a shot at it.

593
00:28:06,963 --> 00:28:08,259
Thank you, Steven.

594
00:28:08,283 --> 00:28:09,963
Moving on, everybody!

595
00:29:29,283 --> 00:29:33,043
Okay, so here's another interesting fact.

596
00:29:33,723 --> 00:29:36,723
Honey is the only food that doesn't spoil.

597
00:29:37,243 --> 00:29:42,163
Honey from the tombs of Egyptian
pharaohs has been tasted by archeologists

598
00:29:42,683 --> 00:29:45,683
and been found to be edible.

599
00:29:46,963 --> 00:29:48,259
Sorry, Robert.

600
00:29:48,283 --> 00:29:50,219
Am I boring you?

601
00:29:50,243 --> 00:29:52,019
WOO-HOO!

602
00:29:52,043 --> 00:29:56,019
Shhhh!
OH, YES SIRREE, BOB! Shhh!

603
00:29:56,043 --> 00:29:58,899
Hungover, he's hungover...
Oh my God! It's a hit!

604
00:29:58,923 --> 00:30:01,419
I'm in a hit! A fucking hit!

605
00:30:01,443 --> 00:30:04,299
“Kravitz, played by a
continually grinning, scratching,

606
00:30:04,323 --> 00:30:09,843
nervous-making-yet-vulnerable
Richard Dreyfuss, comes across effectively

607
00:30:09,963 --> 00:30:12,963
and with force.”
Would you kindly fuck off, boy?

608
00:30:13,643 --> 00:30:14,819
Look here in The Times!

609
00:30:14,843 --> 00:30:16,339
In The Times! Look, there!

610
00:30:16,363 --> 00:30:19,819
“Not a bad performance in the
film.” Not a bad performance!

611
00:30:19,843 --> 00:30:22,843
Oh Christ on a bicycle!
This is it!

612
00:30:22,883 --> 00:30:25,779
I'm big, I'm officially big.

613
00:30:25,803 --> 00:30:29,043
Oh, I'm going to be feted
at Sardi's, and Elaine's.

614
00:30:29,203 --> 00:30:30,979
Have you ever eaten at Elaine's, Roy?
No.

615
00:30:31,003 --> 00:30:33,259
Oh, well, dinner's on me
next time you're in town.

616
00:30:33,283 --> 00:30:36,059
The food stinks, but the clientele
are the crème de la crème.

617
00:30:36,083 --> 00:30:38,779
Are you aware just how much
you sound like a cheap prick?

618
00:30:38,803 --> 00:30:42,163
Oh, you're just hungover from
drinking all night with Thornton Wilder.

619
00:30:42,203 --> 00:30:45,683
Oh God, it hurts me to even
hear you say his name, boy.

620
00:30:46,643 --> 00:30:49,219
I wish you had a scintilla of his class.

621
00:30:49,243 --> 00:30:50,499
Oh man, I wish I'd been there.

622
00:30:50,523 --> 00:30:52,099
Tell me, what did you talk about?

623
00:30:52,123 --> 00:30:53,723
Writing.

624
00:30:54,283 --> 00:30:55,803
Life.

625
00:30:56,203 --> 00:30:57,859
Real things. Oh Christ...

626
00:30:57,883 --> 00:30:59,659
I need my stomach lining.

627
00:30:59,683 --> 00:31:01,923
Would you help me out, Roy?

628
00:31:08,603 --> 00:31:10,083
Thank you.

629
00:31:14,043 --> 00:31:15,043
Six!

630
00:31:26,243 --> 00:31:27,323
What's happening on set?

631
00:31:27,963 --> 00:31:28,700
The usual.

632
00:31:28,724 --> 00:31:31,723
Still trying to fix the shark?
Yup.

633
00:31:32,483 --> 00:31:35,339
All right, let's have a game. Poker.

634
00:31:35,363 --> 00:31:38,523
Oh crap, I left the cards
in my street clothes.

635
00:31:38,763 --> 00:31:41,763
Alright... shove ha' penny?

636
00:31:41,963 --> 00:31:42,740
Excuse me?

637
00:31:42,764 --> 00:31:44,699
Shove ha' penny. It's a pub game.
Let me show you.

638
00:31:44,723 --> 00:31:46,219
Out of the way, boy.

639
00:31:46,243 --> 00:31:50,203
You take a coin, put it on
the table, hit it with your finger,

640
00:31:50,963 --> 00:31:54,923
try to get it as far as you can
without touching the sides or the end.

641
00:31:55,643 --> 00:31:58,339
The one who goes furthest is the winner.

642
00:31:58,363 --> 00:31:59,579
And this is a real game?

643
00:31:59,603 --> 00:32:00,899
This is a real game.

644
00:32:00,923 --> 00:32:02,299
Best of five.

645
00:32:02,323 --> 00:32:04,659
One hundred dollar entry.
A HUNDRED DOLLARS?!

646
00:32:04,683 --> 00:32:05,859
Come on! Roy?

647
00:32:05,883 --> 00:32:08,099
Oh, I see, this is a shakedown!

648
00:32:08,123 --> 00:32:10,099
Oh, come on, Richard,
what else are we going to do?

649
00:32:10,123 --> 00:32:11,659
I don't know, maybe work on my part.

650
00:32:11,683 --> 00:32:13,619
Won't do any good. Very amusing.

651
00:32:13,643 --> 00:32:16,099
You know, call me crazy,
but I take this movie seriously.

652
00:32:16,123 --> 00:32:17,020
This is not a movie.

653
00:32:17,044 --> 00:32:19,179
This is a trifle, an entertainment.

654
00:32:19,203 --> 00:32:22,963
You know, art and entertainment
are not mutually exclusive.

655
00:32:23,003 --> 00:32:24,019
He's got a point.

656
00:32:24,043 --> 00:32:26,819
- I mean, take Casablanca.
- You like Casablanca, right, Robert?

657
00:32:26,843 --> 00:32:28,099
“Kiss me, kiss me

658
00:32:28,123 --> 00:32:29,899
as if it were the last time.”
Of course I like

659
00:32:29,923 --> 00:32:32,139
Casablanca
, Roy - one of Bogies finest.

660
00:32:32,163 --> 00:32:34,099
You think they knew they
were making a “great film”,

661
00:32:34,123 --> 00:32:35,379
or were they just making a trifle?

662
00:32:35,403 --> 00:32:36,619
I get what you're saying, lads,

663
00:32:36,643 --> 00:32:39,643
but I still think this film is
destined for the dustbin of history.

664
00:32:40,003 --> 00:32:42,779
Like those other big beasts of this decade:

665
00:32:42,803 --> 00:32:44,819
The Towering Inferno,

666
00:32:44,843 --> 00:32:45,883
The Exorcist,

667
00:32:46,563 --> 00:32:47,563
Love Story,

668
00:32:47,763 --> 00:32:48,859
Airport.

669
00:32:48,883 --> 00:32:51,563
Do you think anyone's going
to remember any of those?

670
00:32:51,843 --> 00:32:52,859
I like.

671
00:32:52,883 --> 00:32:54,083
That's because you're young...

672
00:32:55,243 --> 00:32:56,979
and an idiot.

673
00:32:57,003 --> 00:32:58,579
You barely know how to wipe your own arse.

674
00:32:58,603 --> 00:32:59,779
Hey I resent that.

675
00:32:59,803 --> 00:33:03,083
I've been wiping my ass perfectly
adequately since I was twenty!

676
00:33:03,963 --> 00:33:06,379
Look are we going to stand around
all day bickering like schoolgirls

677
00:33:06,403 --> 00:33:07,963
or are we going to play shove ha'penny?

678
00:33:08,963 --> 00:33:09,979
I vote for bickering like schoolgirls!

679
00:33:10,003 --> 00:33:12,003
Come on, you degenerates!

680
00:33:12,643 --> 00:33:15,643
I haven't got any ha'pennies,
so quarters'll have to do.

681
00:33:15,763 --> 00:33:17,779
What the fuck is a ha'penny?

682
00:33:17,803 --> 00:33:19,139
Half a penny.

683
00:33:19,163 --> 00:33:20,819
It's perfectly simple -

684
00:33:20,843 --> 00:33:23,043
Two ha'penny to a penny,
twelve pennies to a shilling,

685
00:33:23,083 --> 00:33:26,099
two shillings to a florin,
ten florins to a pound.

686
00:33:26,123 --> 00:33:28,859
On the nose! And a guinea?

687
00:33:28,883 --> 00:33:30,259
Twenty-one shillings!

688
00:33:30,283 --> 00:33:31,260
I'll drink to that.

689
00:33:31,284 --> 00:33:34,283
You're making this up!
Of course we're not.

690
00:33:34,843 --> 00:33:36,419
Right, a hundred dollars in the pot.

691
00:33:36,443 --> 00:33:37,259
Come on! WHAT?

692
00:33:37,283 --> 00:33:38,260
There you go.

693
00:33:38,284 --> 00:33:40,059
Roy! Come on, in!

694
00:33:40,083 --> 00:33:41,939
Now you - cough up, boy!

695
00:33:41,963 --> 00:33:44,699
Why don't you shove
that ha'penny up your ass?!

696
00:33:44,723 --> 00:33:45,700
The money!

697
00:33:45,724 --> 00:33:47,339
I don't have a hundred on me!

698
00:33:47,363 --> 00:33:49,339
Well, you were certainly
flashing the cash around

699
00:33:49,363 --> 00:33:51,739
when you were flirting
with that waitress last night.

700
00:33:51,763 --> 00:33:52,979
Okay, okay. Fine, fine.

701
00:33:53,003 --> 00:33:53,500
Come on!

702
00:33:53,524 --> 00:33:56,859
I'm counting, man!
Let's have it!

703
00:33:56,883 --> 00:33:57,740
Okay, right, right!

704
00:33:57,764 --> 00:34:00,739
Now we can play your
stupid fucking limey game.

705
00:34:00,763 --> 00:34:01,923
Observe, gentlemen.

706
00:34:05,643 --> 00:34:06,500
Not bad.

707
00:34:06,524 --> 00:34:07,539
You next, Roy.

708
00:34:07,563 --> 00:34:11,083
Why do I get the impression this is
how you misspent your youth, Robert?

709
00:34:12,163 --> 00:34:12,900
Pretty good, Roy.

710
00:34:12,924 --> 00:34:14,339
Pretty good for a first try.

711
00:34:14,363 --> 00:34:16,579
Why thank you. Now you, boy.

712
00:34:16,603 --> 00:34:17,603
Okay.

713
00:34:21,923 --> 00:34:23,139
Hey! Can you back off a little?

714
00:34:23,163 --> 00:34:25,083
Terribly sorry.

715
00:34:27,163 --> 00:34:28,020
Goddamn it!

716
00:34:28,044 --> 00:34:30,579
Nerves the better of you?
The fucking coin was bent!

717
00:34:30,603 --> 00:34:34,283
Oh dear me boy, it's a bad
workman that blames his tools.

718
00:34:34,483 --> 00:34:37,483
That's one to me.
Come on! Round two.

719
00:34:37,883 --> 00:34:39,619
Yes! Ba ba boom!

720
00:34:39,643 --> 00:34:40,779
This is the one.

721
00:34:40,803 --> 00:34:43,699
Come on Roy! Here we go. Nice.

722
00:34:43,723 --> 00:34:46,259
Oh would you look at that!

723
00:34:46,283 --> 00:34:48,843
No, no, Roy, you weren't behind the line.

724
00:34:49,483 --> 00:34:50,260
What line?

725
00:34:50,284 --> 00:34:52,539
This line - forgot to mention it.
Hey, what the hell?

726
00:34:52,563 --> 00:34:54,523
Come on. No cheating.

727
00:34:55,563 --> 00:34:57,523
Man, this is not okay!

728
00:34:59,323 --> 00:35:00,659
Oh crap. Sorry, Roy.

729
00:35:00,683 --> 00:35:02,059
How many of these games do you know?

730
00:35:02,083 --> 00:35:05,843
Oh, quite a few -
Jenkins, penny football, pitch-and-toss.

731
00:35:06,163 --> 00:35:08,323
We must play pitch-and-toss.

732
00:35:09,563 --> 00:35:10,923
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

733
00:35:12,163 --> 00:35:13,579
Oh, yeah!

734
00:35:13,603 --> 00:35:15,779
All right, all right. Don't
get too full of yourself.

735
00:35:15,803 --> 00:35:18,179
That's one to you.
It sure is, buddy.

736
00:35:18,203 --> 00:35:21,203
Okay, here we go.

737
00:35:23,043 --> 00:35:23,700
Shit man.

738
00:35:23,724 --> 00:35:26,723
Pride comes before a fall, eh laddie? Roy?

739
00:35:27,083 --> 00:35:28,020
Okay.

740
00:35:28,044 --> 00:35:31,963
Perhaps this is my chance to redeem myself.

741
00:35:34,803 --> 00:35:35,740
Perhaps not.

742
00:35:35,764 --> 00:35:39,579
Farewell and adieu to
you fair Spanish ladies.

743
00:35:39,603 --> 00:35:44,603
Farewell and adieu to you ladies of Spain!

744
00:35:45,523 --> 00:35:46,180
Whoa!

745
00:35:46,204 --> 00:35:47,419
Remarkable.

746
00:35:47,443 --> 00:35:49,099
You're a hustler.

747
00:35:49,123 --> 00:35:50,619
He's a fucking hustler.

748
00:35:50,643 --> 00:35:52,339
Two to me and one to you!

749
00:35:52,363 --> 00:35:54,339
Yeah, yeah, okay - get on with it.

750
00:35:54,363 --> 00:35:58,563
For we've received orders
for to sail back to Boston…

751
00:35:58,763 --> 00:35:59,763
Oh, you hit the side!

752
00:35:59,843 --> 00:36:01,579
BUGGER!
Oh, that's not so good, Robert!

753
00:36:01,603 --> 00:36:03,659
What were you saying about
pride coming before the fall?

754
00:36:03,683 --> 00:36:05,779
The table surface is irregular.

755
00:36:05,803 --> 00:36:08,019
Now, who's blaming his tools?
Okay, here we go.

756
00:36:08,043 --> 00:36:09,043
Come on.

757
00:36:09,803 --> 00:36:11,699
Just can't get the hang of this game.

758
00:36:11,723 --> 00:36:15,939
Step aside, gentlemen, make
way for Deadeye Dreyfuss..

759
00:36:15,963 --> 00:36:17,123
Get on with it!

760
00:36:19,443 --> 00:36:20,420
OH!

761
00:36:20,444 --> 00:36:22,779
Very good Richard! You
played this game before?

762
00:36:22,803 --> 00:36:23,420
Yeah sure.

763
00:36:23,444 --> 00:36:26,443
We play a lot of shove
ha'penny in Beverly Hills.

764
00:36:26,483 --> 00:36:27,699
That's two-all to us.

765
00:36:27,723 --> 00:36:30,019
I wonder what I'm going
to buy with my 300 bucks?

766
00:36:30,043 --> 00:36:33,043
I'm going to grind you into the dirt, boy.

767
00:36:33,283 --> 00:36:36,363
Robert, has anyone ever told
you you're kind of competitive?

768
00:36:36,403 --> 00:36:38,739
You don't know the half
of it. When I was seven

769
00:36:38,763 --> 00:36:42,379
my father moved the whole family,
lock, stock, and barrel, to the Orkneys

770
00:36:42,403 --> 00:36:44,219
off the coast of Scotland.

771
00:36:44,243 --> 00:36:46,339
A bloody inhospitable place.

772
00:36:46,363 --> 00:36:49,339
I was the only boy in the entire
school with an English accent.

773
00:36:49,363 --> 00:36:51,499
The other children made my life hell.

774
00:36:51,523 --> 00:36:54,099
I'm sure it would have been worse
if I'd been able to understand a word

775
00:36:54,123 --> 00:36:55,123
they were saying…

776
00:36:55,923 --> 00:36:57,539
I'm was obsessed with football.

777
00:36:57,563 --> 00:37:00,019
Oh, you mean soccer?
No, football!

778
00:37:00,043 --> 00:37:02,939
The first thing I wanted to do in the
Orkneys was to join the school team,

779
00:37:02,963 --> 00:37:05,619
but they turned me down, the
bastards. Said I wasn't good enough.

780
00:37:05,643 --> 00:37:08,643
But it was because I was
English, because of the accent.

781
00:37:08,763 --> 00:37:12,403
So I formed my own team.

782
00:37:13,603 --> 00:37:17,219
I went round the whole school
and I rounded up all the other misfits

783
00:37:17,243 --> 00:37:18,060
they'd turned down -

784
00:37:18,084 --> 00:37:22,643
the Irish lad, the fat boy, the
boy with the inch-thick spectacles.

785
00:37:23,243 --> 00:37:26,019
I found ten of them, and I was the captain.

786
00:37:26,043 --> 00:37:30,443
I trained those boys every day
out there on the icy playing fields

787
00:37:30,883 --> 00:37:33,099
and then we challenged
the school team to a match -

788
00:37:33,123 --> 00:37:35,123
And you beat them ten-zero!

789
00:37:35,443 --> 00:37:37,979
…Four-nil, actually. Have
I told this story before?!

790
00:37:38,003 --> 00:37:40,139
No, no, but we've all seen
The Magnificent Seven.

791
00:37:40,163 --> 00:37:41,339
Are you doubting my word?

792
00:37:41,363 --> 00:37:45,379
Oh, come on, Robert, please -
Now, Richard, no punching below the belt.

793
00:37:45,403 --> 00:37:48,499
Everybody calm down,
four weeks is a long time to

794
00:37:48,523 --> 00:37:49,419
be stuck together.

795
00:37:49,443 --> 00:37:50,420
Four weeks is a long time

796
00:37:50,444 --> 00:37:53,723
to be stuck on a slow boat to China
with Brigitte Bardot and Raquel Welch.

797
00:37:53,843 --> 00:37:55,619
With you, it's a fucking eternity!

798
00:37:55,643 --> 00:37:57,499
Hey, come on, come on, let's play.

799
00:37:57,523 --> 00:38:01,123
I'll go first, seeing as
I'm bound to do badly.

800
00:38:02,923 --> 00:38:04,659
Christ Roy, just retire.

801
00:38:04,683 --> 00:38:06,019
Yeah okay, I will.

802
00:38:06,043 --> 00:38:08,579
Come on boy. Two-all!

803
00:38:08,603 --> 00:38:09,859
It's do or die.

804
00:38:09,883 --> 00:38:11,899
Hands don't fail me now.

805
00:38:11,923 --> 00:38:14,923
You'll never do it, you little punk.

806
00:38:18,723 --> 00:38:20,579
FUCK! Oh no!

807
00:38:20,603 --> 00:38:23,699
Damn it, man, I was
the worst shot of my life!

808
00:38:23,723 --> 00:38:30,539
I've been a wild rover for many a
year and I've spent all my money on

809
00:38:30,563 --> 00:38:37,843
whisky and beer and now I'm
returning with gold in great store.

810
00:38:39,003 --> 00:38:41,699
I never will play the wild rover

811
00:38:41,723 --> 00:38:45,643
no more and it's no, nay, never!

812
00:38:46,683 --> 00:38:54,003
No, nay, never, no more
will I play the wild rover.

813
00:38:54,683 --> 00:38:58,043
No never, no more!

814
00:38:59,363 --> 00:39:02,259
Oh you lost! Oh, Jesus Christ!

815
00:39:02,283 --> 00:39:03,299
THANK YOU GOD!

816
00:39:03,323 --> 00:39:06,099
THANK YOU JEHOVAH!
He's gonna be unbearable.

817
00:39:06,123 --> 00:39:07,363
WOOHOO!

818
00:39:08,203 --> 00:39:10,459
ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, YOU WIN! Goddamn it!

819
00:39:10,483 --> 00:39:13,483
Boy, you are such a bad loser, man!

820
00:39:13,603 --> 00:39:15,179
Let it go, Robert.

821
00:39:15,203 --> 00:39:16,779
Woohoo!

822
00:39:16,803 --> 00:39:18,459
Yeah, yeah, I see the money.

823
00:39:18,483 --> 00:39:20,939
I see the money. Put it away.

824
00:39:20,963 --> 00:39:22,179
Dumb luck, I guess!

825
00:39:22,203 --> 00:39:24,443
For sure!

826
00:39:25,483 --> 00:39:26,420
Why is there a bottle of whisky

827
00:39:26,444 --> 00:39:28,403
strapped to the underside of the table?

828
00:39:35,683 --> 00:39:38,683
In case it's needed.

829
00:39:51,403 --> 00:39:54,403
May I have a drink?

830
00:40:00,203 --> 00:40:03,203
Knock yourself out.

831
00:40:24,363 --> 00:40:26,539
You know,

832
00:40:26,563 --> 00:40:28,299
there's a question I've
been wanting to ask...

833
00:40:28,323 --> 00:40:31,323
And what might that be?

834
00:40:32,843 --> 00:40:33,939
Why do you drink so much?

835
00:40:33,963 --> 00:40:37,299
To cope with smart-arses like you, Richard.

836
00:40:37,323 --> 00:40:41,219
No. Seriously.

837
00:40:41,243 --> 00:40:42,180
Roy?

838
00:40:42,204 --> 00:40:43,843
Just a finger.

839
00:40:45,083 --> 00:40:47,779
I'm English.

840
00:40:47,803 --> 00:40:50,803
We have to drink to cope with the climate.

841
00:40:52,203 --> 00:40:55,203
If the English didn't drink
we'd have died out years ago.

842
00:40:55,723 --> 00:40:58,443
No no no no no, I don't buy that.

843
00:40:59,963 --> 00:41:00,620
No, I know plenty

844
00:41:00,644 --> 00:41:03,643
of Brits that don't hit the bottle.

845
00:41:04,523 --> 00:41:06,923
Come on, I want the real reason.

846
00:41:08,163 --> 00:41:10,219
What is it the “artistic
temperament” shtick?

847
00:41:10,243 --> 00:41:12,483
Why does anybody drink?

848
00:41:15,763 --> 00:41:18,123
Why do you smoke that's the
stuff that makes you giggle?

849
00:41:19,963 --> 00:41:22,563
Why do you snort that powder
that makes your eyes water?

850
00:41:22,603 --> 00:41:26,963
I've seen you coming out of the
boghouse red-eyed, sniffing like a dog.

851
00:41:27,283 --> 00:41:28,739
Now, why would you do that?

852
00:41:28,763 --> 00:41:31,259
I'm not gonna deny I like
getting high occasionally.

853
00:41:31,283 --> 00:41:34,003
Yes, that's how it starts.

854
00:41:34,483 --> 00:41:37,483
My God, I loved to drink when I was young.

855
00:41:38,203 --> 00:41:41,179
It was such pleasure going to the pub

856
00:41:41,203 --> 00:41:44,203
and getting smashed after a show.

857
00:41:44,283 --> 00:41:46,459
People talk about there
being a cultural pressure

858
00:41:46,483 --> 00:41:49,323
to drink in England, but as a young man

859
00:41:49,483 --> 00:41:50,563
it felt natural,

860
00:41:51,723 --> 00:41:53,643
wonderful,

861
00:41:54,483 --> 00:41:55,579
it freed us up.

862
00:41:55,603 --> 00:41:58,603
We talked about art, politics,

863
00:41:59,203 --> 00:42:01,099
we were theatrical revolutionaries,

864
00:42:01,123 --> 00:42:04,123
we were going to change the world!

865
00:42:05,163 --> 00:42:06,779
Working with George Devine

866
00:42:06,803 --> 00:42:09,803
at the Royal Court,

867
00:42:09,883 --> 00:42:10,979
doing The Long and The Short

868
00:42:11,003 --> 00:42:14,003
and The Tall with Peter O'Toole…

869
00:42:14,083 --> 00:42:15,499
Heaven.

870
00:42:15,523 --> 00:42:17,299
Oh, I think you did change the world.

871
00:42:17,323 --> 00:42:20,643
It's just that the world
tends to revert to type.

872
00:42:20,763 --> 00:42:22,699
Bless you, Roy.

873
00:42:22,723 --> 00:42:24,139
Anyway…we were competitive.

874
00:42:24,163 --> 00:42:29,683
We'd pride ourselves on still being able
to function after a tidal wave of booze!

875
00:42:29,883 --> 00:42:32,899
Still standing, like a bull

876
00:42:32,923 --> 00:42:35,403
peppered with banderillas.

877
00:42:36,763 --> 00:42:38,179
I don't know at what point

878
00:42:38,203 --> 00:42:41,203
drink became a part of me...

879
00:42:41,243 --> 00:42:44,019
perhaps even before I was born.

880
00:42:44,043 --> 00:42:46,819
My father was an alcoholic, you know.

881
00:42:46,843 --> 00:42:49,859
A real alcoholic, not
just a barroom brawler

882
00:42:49,883 --> 00:42:53,563
or a dilettante drinker like O'Toole.

883
00:42:54,483 --> 00:42:57,643
A proper hollow-legged drunkard...

884
00:42:58,443 --> 00:43:01,443
Trouble is, these days I find
it interferes with my writing.

885
00:43:02,563 --> 00:43:05,059
I tried to quit last year,

886
00:43:05,083 --> 00:43:07,139
but I found myself with a drink in my hand

887
00:43:07,163 --> 00:43:10,163
as a reward for a week of not drinking.

888
00:43:12,163 --> 00:43:15,163
Cheers!

889
00:43:20,163 --> 00:43:21,659
Well, we do appear to be having

890
00:43:21,683 --> 00:43:24,683
a real old heart-to-heart, don't we?

891
00:43:26,243 --> 00:43:31,099
How'd you get that beautiful
broken nose, Mr. Scheider?

892
00:43:31,123 --> 00:43:34,523
The 1946 Diamond Gloves tournament.

893
00:43:35,643 --> 00:43:36,540
I was thirteen.

894
00:43:36,564 --> 00:43:41,403
I lost by technical knockout
to Myron Greenberg.

895
00:43:41,483 --> 00:43:42,739
You were a boxer?

896
00:43:42,763 --> 00:43:43,380
Welterweight.

897
00:43:43,404 --> 00:43:46,099
Oh, that's a real man's profession.

898
00:43:46,123 --> 00:43:49,179
Not like this, poncing about
on a sound stage covered

899
00:43:49,203 --> 00:43:51,603
in makeup like a prostitute!

900
00:43:52,723 --> 00:43:54,259
Was your father a boxer?

901
00:43:54,283 --> 00:43:56,499
No, no, he was an auto mechanic.

902
00:43:56,523 --> 00:43:59,923
He ran a local gas station, you
know, typical blue-collar guy but

903
00:44:00,883 --> 00:44:02,819
full of contradictions.

904
00:44:02,843 --> 00:44:05,059
You know, he hates everybody.

905
00:44:05,083 --> 00:44:08,203
Blacks, Jews, Catholics, Communists.

906
00:44:08,683 --> 00:44:13,699
And yet he married a Catholic,
his friends with the Jewish people

907
00:44:13,723 --> 00:44:16,763
who ran the local store
and his dentist was black.

908
00:44:18,043 --> 00:44:20,779
But behind closed doors,

909
00:44:20,803 --> 00:44:23,883
all this bile came pouring out.

910
00:44:25,003 --> 00:44:27,779
He made derogatory remarks

911
00:44:27,803 --> 00:44:28,899
right in front of us.

912
00:44:28,923 --> 00:44:31,819
Did you fight with him? Oh yeah!

913
00:44:31,843 --> 00:44:33,979
He beat the hell out of me.

914
00:44:34,003 --> 00:44:37,003
My biggest crime was disagreeing with him.

915
00:44:37,643 --> 00:44:39,499
Well, I realised as an adolescent

916
00:44:39,523 --> 00:44:42,523
that what my father was
telling me wasn't true.

917
00:44:43,763 --> 00:44:44,819
I took the beatings

918
00:44:44,843 --> 00:44:47,843
to let him know he wasn't fooling me.

919
00:44:49,043 --> 00:44:51,019
But my mother couldn't intervene

920
00:44:51,043 --> 00:44:54,043
so I got the support that I needed from a

921
00:44:54,443 --> 00:44:57,443
man who worked at the gas station.

922
00:44:57,643 --> 00:45:00,259
One of my father's black
employees, as a matter of fact.

923
00:45:00,283 --> 00:45:02,163
A guy named Friend Avery.

924
00:45:03,483 --> 00:45:06,539
I bet you couldn't wait to get as far
as you could from the family business.

925
00:45:06,563 --> 00:45:07,779
It's complicated, you know!

926
00:45:07,803 --> 00:45:10,339
I was a sick kid, I had rheumatic fever.

927
00:45:10,363 --> 00:45:13,259
I'd have these horrendous attacks.

928
00:45:13,283 --> 00:45:15,579
My mother stayed home to take care of me.

929
00:45:15,603 --> 00:45:17,939
She thought I was going to die.

930
00:45:17,963 --> 00:45:20,963
I spent an awful lot of time in bed

931
00:45:21,363 --> 00:45:23,219
thinking,

932
00:45:23,243 --> 00:45:26,739
dreaming, you know, creating
all these fantasy worlds.

933
00:45:26,763 --> 00:45:28,979
That's probably what led me into acting.

934
00:45:29,003 --> 00:45:34,779
To this day, I cannot stand to be in a
room with an unmade bed or drawn drapes.

935
00:45:34,803 --> 00:45:38,603
I have to throw them open to let
in the fresh air and the sunshine.

936
00:45:41,323 --> 00:45:44,019
My dad wanted me to be a lawyer.

937
00:45:44,043 --> 00:45:44,620
I know right?

938
00:45:44,644 --> 00:45:45,899
Typical Jewish family.

939
00:45:45,923 --> 00:45:48,163
You got to be a lawyer or a doctor.

940
00:45:49,363 --> 00:45:51,019
You know, you may find
this difficult to believe,

941
00:45:51,043 --> 00:45:52,499
but I was kind of an irritating kid.

942
00:45:52,523 --> 00:45:54,003
No, no!

943
00:45:54,123 --> 00:45:55,539
Yeah, yeah.

944
00:45:55,563 --> 00:45:56,260
Short.

945
00:45:56,284 --> 00:45:59,179
Scrawny. Overconfident.

946
00:45:59,203 --> 00:46:02,203
I went to see The Great
White Hope on Broadway.

947
00:46:02,403 --> 00:46:04,339
I didn't like the play,
didn't like the direction.

948
00:46:04,363 --> 00:46:07,659
But in two scenes, Jane Alexander

949
00:46:07,683 --> 00:46:10,683
and James Earl Jones

950
00:46:11,083 --> 00:46:14,083
got to me so badly,

951
00:46:15,043 --> 00:46:18,883
so deeply, that I was not only crying,

952
00:46:19,603 --> 00:46:23,763
I was snotting gracelessly down my face!

953
00:46:23,803 --> 00:46:25,299
I mean, I was beyond hope!

954
00:46:25,323 --> 00:46:28,363
Oh, and when it ended,
I leaped into the air.

955
00:46:29,523 --> 00:46:32,539
I was wearing my little bar
mitzvah suit on a trip to the city,

956
00:46:32,563 --> 00:46:35,763
and I was shaken to my core.

957
00:46:37,083 --> 00:46:39,859
So later, I was sitting with my mother

958
00:46:39,883 --> 00:46:42,883
at the kitchen table, and I told her.

959
00:46:44,323 --> 00:46:45,603
I want to be an actor.

960
00:46:47,203 --> 00:46:50,203
And she said “Well, don't
just talk about it, do it!”

961
00:46:50,443 --> 00:46:52,203
So I got up

962
00:46:52,843 --> 00:46:56,203
and I auditioned for a play at the
West Side Jewish Community Center.

963
00:46:57,723 --> 00:47:00,843
My dad was not happy.

964
00:47:01,123 --> 00:47:04,379
Oh, but you should hear
him now on the subject of.

965
00:47:04,403 --> 00:47:07,603
“My son, the famous actor.”
Oh, my dad's the same.

966
00:47:08,403 --> 00:47:10,659
When I was nominated for
French Connection, he wouldn't

967
00:47:10,683 --> 00:47:14,163
even come to the phone, but now,
you know, he gets a real kick out of it!

968
00:47:14,923 --> 00:47:17,923
Hey, is your father still around, Robert?
No.

969
00:47:19,123 --> 00:47:22,123
He killed himself when I was twelve.

970
00:47:24,003 --> 00:47:25,003
Oh, shit.

971
00:47:25,803 --> 00:47:26,220
Really?

972
00:47:26,244 --> 00:47:27,563
Oh yes.

973
00:47:28,523 --> 00:47:31,523
Christ, he's been gone such a long time.

974
00:47:31,763 --> 00:47:34,379
He was a Victorian…
Funny to think that, isn't it?

975
00:47:34,403 --> 00:47:35,803
Different era.

976
00:47:37,123 --> 00:47:41,043
An extraordinary man… marvelous man.

977
00:47:42,283 --> 00:47:43,923
He was a doctor in the Orkneys,

978
00:47:44,683 --> 00:47:46,579
I told you about the
Orkneys, those terrible islands

979
00:47:46,603 --> 00:47:49,603
where there's wind and sea and
you get hundred mile-an-hour gales.

980
00:47:50,283 --> 00:47:52,899
He was the lighthouse
doctor, and he used to keep

981
00:47:52,923 --> 00:47:55,603
a medical bag on each island,

982
00:47:56,243 --> 00:47:59,323
and when the boat couldn't get
in because the sea was so rough,

983
00:48:00,083 --> 00:48:03,083
he used to tie a rope around his waist,

984
00:48:03,843 --> 00:48:07,283
and jump into the freezing
water and swim ashore, and

985
00:48:08,683 --> 00:48:11,683
there would be his
medical bag, and he would

986
00:48:12,203 --> 00:48:15,203
deliver whatever baby was to be delivered.
Wow.

987
00:48:16,203 --> 00:48:19,203
I don't know whether being in the
First World War drove him to drink.

988
00:48:20,523 --> 00:48:22,219
He would sit at the end of my bed and cry

989
00:48:22,243 --> 00:48:24,723
when he thought I was asleep.

990
00:48:26,123 --> 00:48:26,940
I've always wished

991
00:48:26,964 --> 00:48:30,043
he could have lived a little longer,
because I felt I could have helped him.

992
00:48:31,083 --> 00:48:33,259
Which all boys feel, I
think if their father dies,

993
00:48:33,283 --> 00:48:36,283
whether it's in a war - it's
Vietnam, it's drugs, it's drink, or

994
00:48:37,963 --> 00:48:40,179
whatever the hell it is,
you always feel, if you're

995
00:48:40,203 --> 00:48:43,803
a proud son, that you
could have… said something.

996
00:48:46,003 --> 00:48:48,299
For years,

997
00:48:48,323 --> 00:48:49,180
I dreamt

998
00:48:49,204 --> 00:48:51,379
I was walking with my
father in a beautiful place

999
00:48:51,403 --> 00:48:54,243
and I was holding his
hand and I said to him:

1000
00:48:55,403 --> 00:48:58,403
“Everything'll be alright, Dad.”

1001
00:48:59,803 --> 00:49:01,803
Well, I never got to that…

1002
00:49:04,323 --> 00:49:06,059
He wanted me to be a doctor.

1003
00:49:06,083 --> 00:49:08,779
It was a school teacher that got me
into the theatre, a man named Wilkes.

1004
00:49:08,803 --> 00:49:11,019
He took us up to the West End.

1005
00:49:11,043 --> 00:49:14,043
I saw Gielgud's Hamlet.

1006
00:49:14,963 --> 00:49:17,043
Dad was gone by then.

1007
00:49:17,963 --> 00:49:18,780
You know, it's funny.

1008
00:49:18,804 --> 00:49:21,499
I've always thought I must
live at least as long as he did.

1009
00:49:21,523 --> 00:49:22,523
I don't know why.

1010
00:49:23,643 --> 00:49:26,019
Perhaps it's something all men feel.

1011
00:49:26,043 --> 00:49:27,699
How old was he when he died?

1012
00:49:27,723 --> 00:49:29,123
Fifty-two.

1013
00:49:29,403 --> 00:49:30,499
How old are you now?

1014
00:49:30,523 --> 00:49:31,340
Forty-seven.

1015
00:49:31,364 --> 00:49:32,539
Five more years to go...

1016
00:49:32,563 --> 00:49:33,963
if I make it.

1017
00:49:36,563 --> 00:49:37,563
Yeah?

1018
00:49:39,243 --> 00:49:40,100
Well, I can help with that.

1019
00:49:40,124 --> 00:49:41,659
What are you doing, boy?
Richard?

1020
00:49:41,683 --> 00:49:43,579
I'm saving you a life, pal?
Richard??

1021
00:49:43,603 --> 00:49:45,979
What are you fucking doing?
I should have done this weeks ago.

1022
00:49:46,003 --> 00:49:47,739
Richard? Richard!

1023
00:49:47,763 --> 00:49:49,883
RICHARD, NO!!!

1024
00:49:52,003 --> 00:49:53,539
Calm down! Easy.

1025
00:49:53,563 --> 00:49:54,340
Whoa whoa whoa!

1026
00:49:54,364 --> 00:49:55,979
KEEP STILL YOU SON OF A BITCH!
ROBERT!

1027
00:49:56,003 --> 00:49:57,899
I'll KILL YOU! I'll FUCKING KILL YOU!

1028
00:49:57,923 --> 00:49:59,939
FUCKING LITTLE BASTARD!
You're choking me!

1029
00:49:59,963 --> 00:50:00,540
That's enough!

1030
00:50:00,564 --> 00:50:02,699
NEVER TOUCH ANOTHER MAN'S
BOOZE! DID NO ONE EVER TELL YOU THAT?

1031
00:50:02,723 --> 00:50:03,979
NEVER TOUCH ANOTHER MAN'S BOOZE!

1032
00:50:04,003 --> 00:50:06,019
Let go of him, Robert, you're going
to hurt him! I'M GONNA KILL HIM!

1033
00:50:06,043 --> 00:50:08,259
Robert! We're shooting a
movie for Universal Pictures.

1034
00:50:08,283 --> 00:50:09,299
If you kill him, they will sue you.

1035
00:50:09,323 --> 00:50:11,259
They'll sue your wife. Sue your kids.

1036
00:50:11,283 --> 00:50:13,843
Hell, they might even sue me!
AH!

1037
00:50:18,043 --> 00:50:19,043
Lunatic.

1038
00:50:19,323 --> 00:50:20,499
You fucking lunatic!

1039
00:50:20,523 --> 00:50:23,259
You could've injured me badly!
Oh, shut up, you little crybaby.

1040
00:50:23,283 --> 00:50:24,459
I barely touched you.

1041
00:50:24,483 --> 00:50:26,979
My whole life flashed in front of my eyes.

1042
00:50:27,003 --> 00:50:29,179
Your theatrical gesture backfired.

1043
00:50:29,203 --> 00:50:31,819
Yeah, I got to say, that played
out a lot better in my head.

1044
00:50:31,843 --> 00:50:33,619
You owe me ten dollars for that bottle!

1045
00:50:33,643 --> 00:50:34,739
It was half-empty!

1046
00:50:34,763 --> 00:50:37,619
GIMME THE MONEY! FINE!

1047
00:50:37,643 --> 00:50:39,859
I'm gonna have to find someone
else to go down the liquor store.

1048
00:50:39,883 --> 00:50:43,083
Oh, don't tell me you don't have another
bottle stuffed around here somewhere.

1049
00:50:43,123 --> 00:50:44,819
Maybe I have and maybe I haven't.

1050
00:50:44,843 --> 00:50:46,139
You will never know.

1051
00:50:46,163 --> 00:50:47,763
Go fuck yourself!

1052
00:50:48,723 --> 00:50:51,723
- Hey and another thing.
- That play of yours -

1053
00:50:52,163 --> 00:50:55,259
The Man in the Glass Booth,
that's anti-Semetic, man!

1054
00:50:55,283 --> 00:50:57,019
I thought you called
yourself an intellectual boy!

1055
00:50:57,043 --> 00:50:58,899
You've the mentality of a tabloid hack!

1056
00:50:58,923 --> 00:51:02,419
And I don't like you calling me “boy”.
Is that right, BOY!?

1057
00:51:02,443 --> 00:51:04,219
Jesus, you two!

1058
00:51:04,243 --> 00:51:06,499
Please, will you fucking relax?

1059
00:51:06,523 --> 00:51:08,139
You're going to give me
a nervous breakdown.

1060
00:51:08,163 --> 00:51:11,123
Now, we got to finish this
movie and get the hell out of here!

1061
00:51:13,643 --> 00:51:14,843
Yeah,

1062
00:51:15,763 --> 00:51:16,579
yeah, I guess.

1063
00:51:16,603 --> 00:51:17,540
So, come on.

1064
00:51:17,564 --> 00:51:20,683
Please shake hands. What?!

1065
00:51:21,203 --> 00:51:23,043
Oh, come on.

1066
00:51:28,563 --> 00:51:29,939
I'm sorry I threw your liquor

1067
00:51:29,963 --> 00:51:31,643
overboard, Robert.

1068
00:51:34,083 --> 00:51:37,243
Very well, Richard, I accept your apology.

1069
00:51:38,363 --> 00:51:40,459
But if you ever lay a
finger on one of my bottles

1070
00:51:40,483 --> 00:51:43,483
again, I will put you in the ground.

1071
00:51:47,803 --> 00:51:50,579
You know what I like about you, Robert?

1072
00:51:50,603 --> 00:51:53,363
You're so easy going,

1073
00:51:53,883 --> 00:51:55,643
so carefree.

1074
00:51:56,443 --> 00:51:58,539
Just remind me to never
get you angry again.

1075
00:51:58,563 --> 00:52:00,099
That wasn't me getting angry, Richard.

1076
00:52:00,123 --> 00:52:02,683
When I'm angry, you'll know about it.

1077
00:52:07,083 --> 00:52:08,083
Hey!

1078
00:52:11,123 --> 00:52:14,139
Thank you for not
putting him in the ground.

1079
00:52:14,163 --> 00:52:16,939
My dear fellow, I am a professional.

1080
00:52:16,963 --> 00:52:18,699
Sounds incredible, but the weather's right,

1081
00:52:18,723 --> 00:52:21,619
there are no boats in shot,
and Bruce is actually working.

1082
00:52:21,643 --> 00:52:23,019
Roy, they're ready for us.
Really?

1083
00:52:23,043 --> 00:52:23,780
Come on! Quick!

1084
00:52:23,804 --> 00:52:26,099
Before any of those three things change.

1085
00:52:26,123 --> 00:52:29,579
Richard - a piece of advice
before they start shooting...

1086
00:52:29,603 --> 00:52:32,083
Yeah? Mind your mannerisms!

1087
00:52:58,123 --> 00:52:58,659
Okay...

1088
00:52:58,683 --> 00:52:59,620
when you're ready Robert.

1089
00:52:59,644 --> 00:53:01,763
Just a moment.

1090
00:53:10,603 --> 00:53:11,540
Alright.

1091
00:53:11,564 --> 00:53:14,299
Okay... Quiet on set
everybody... quiet please.

1092
00:53:14,323 --> 00:53:18,299
“Japanese submarine slammed
two torpedoes into our side, Chief...”

1093
00:53:18,323 --> 00:53:21,323
Sorry Robert - we're not rolling.
Oh shit.

1094
00:53:21,523 --> 00:53:23,619
Oh sorry. My mistake.

1095
00:53:23,643 --> 00:53:25,643
Okay, quiet on set!

1096
00:53:26,203 --> 00:53:27,923
Camera? Rolling!

1097
00:53:28,683 --> 00:53:30,459
Sound? Speed.

1098
00:53:30,483 --> 00:53:31,523
Mark it.

1099
00:53:31,723 --> 00:53:33,179
Scene 191, D.

1100
00:53:33,203 --> 00:53:36,723
Take one. And action!

1101
00:53:36,923 --> 00:53:40,979
“Japanese submarine slammed
two torpedoes into her side, Chief…

1102
00:53:41,003 --> 00:53:44,003
We was comin' back
from the island of Leyte…

1103
00:53:44,923 --> 00:53:47,859
Oh Christ, sorry,

1104
00:53:47,883 --> 00:53:48,780
sorry...

1105
00:53:48,804 --> 00:53:51,803
keep rolling!

1106
00:53:54,123 --> 00:53:56,859
Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes

1107
00:53:56,883 --> 00:54:01,539
into our side, Chief… We was comin'
back from the island of Tinian to Leyte.

1108
00:54:01,563 --> 00:54:04,539
We'd just delivered the bomb.

1109
00:54:04,563 --> 00:54:06,203
The Hiroshima bomb.

1110
00:54:07,443 --> 00:54:09,403
Eleven hundred men went into the water.

1111
00:54:09,843 --> 00:54:13,003
Vessel went down in twelve minutes…”.

1112
00:54:15,523 --> 00:54:17,699
Christ, what comes next?

1113
00:54:17,723 --> 00:54:19,019
Didn't see the first shark
for about half an hour…

1114
00:54:19,043 --> 00:54:20,659
What…?! Speak up, for god's sake!

1115
00:54:20,683 --> 00:54:22,779
Didn't see the first shark
for about half an hour...

1116
00:54:22,803 --> 00:54:24,979
Shut up, boy! Are you playing Quint now?!

1117
00:54:25,003 --> 00:54:28,003
I know the bloody lines,
fool, I fuckin' wrote them.

1118
00:54:28,363 --> 00:54:31,363
Look at your furry little face!

1119
00:54:31,723 --> 00:54:33,043
He's like a Chihuahua!

1120
00:54:34,843 --> 00:54:35,300
You know,

1121
00:54:35,324 --> 00:54:38,443
there is one part you could
play in Shakespeare, boy!

1122
00:54:39,003 --> 00:54:40,739
The Fool!

1123
00:54:40,763 --> 00:54:42,859
You play Fool and I'll play Lear.

1124
00:54:42,883 --> 00:54:45,083
How about that?

1125
00:54:45,523 --> 00:54:47,659
“You think I'll weep…

1126
00:54:47,683 --> 00:54:50,059
No, I'll not weep,

1127
00:54:50,083 --> 00:54:53,083
I have full cause of
weeping, you motherfuckers!

1128
00:54:53,923 --> 00:54:59,083
But this heart shall break into a
hundred thousand flaws, or ere I'll weep…”.

1129
00:55:00,683 --> 00:55:02,859
You play Fool to my Lear, and I'll

1130
00:55:02,883 --> 00:55:04,763
play Falstaff to his Chihuahua!

1131
00:55:06,803 --> 00:55:09,259
Robert, I think we should leave it there!

1132
00:55:09,283 --> 00:55:10,179
Sorry Steven!

1133
00:55:10,203 --> 00:55:11,060
I slipped!

1134
00:55:11,084 --> 00:55:14,059
Alright, everybody, that's a wrap!

1135
00:55:14,083 --> 00:55:17,363
Oh, Roy, Roy, Roy my boy,

1136
00:55:18,403 --> 00:55:21,523
you're a good man, very loyal,

1137
00:55:22,843 --> 00:55:26,579
you can play Kent - or
Gloucester, if you don't mind

1138
00:55:26,603 --> 00:55:29,603
your eyes being gouged out...

1139
00:55:32,243 --> 00:55:34,083
Sorry everybody!

1140
00:55:36,483 --> 00:55:38,043
Sorry...

1141
00:56:42,203 --> 00:56:46,043
AAAHHHHHH!

1142
00:57:14,163 --> 00:57:14,900
“That's it.

1143
00:57:14,924 --> 00:57:16,019
Goodbye.

1144
00:57:16,043 --> 00:57:19,483
I'm not gonna waste my time arguing with
a man who's lining up to be a hot lunch…”

1145
00:57:21,683 --> 00:57:23,019
“That's it. Goodbye.”

1146
00:57:23,043 --> 00:57:24,043
No.

1147
00:57:24,523 --> 00:57:25,100
“That's it.

1148
00:57:25,124 --> 00:57:26,283
Goodbye…”

1149
00:57:28,483 --> 00:57:29,460
“That's it.

1150
00:57:29,484 --> 00:57:30,499
Goodbye.

1151
00:57:30,523 --> 00:57:34,379
I'm not gonna waste my time arguing with
a man who's lining up to be a hot lunch.”

1152
00:57:34,403 --> 00:57:35,803
Shit.

1153
00:58:03,683 --> 00:58:06,619
Piece of advice, boy.

1154
00:58:06,643 --> 00:58:08,779
Listen to me -

1155
00:58:08,803 --> 00:58:10,939
when I was on the London stage

1156
00:58:10,963 --> 00:58:14,443
playing Macbeth back in 1906,

1157
00:58:15,163 --> 00:58:18,219
Sir Robertson Fuckwad
said to me, he said to me.

1158
00:58:18,243 --> 00:58:22,619
“Shaw, you are the biggest
douchebag I have ever

1159
00:58:22,643 --> 00:58:25,643
had the misfortune to have met.”

1160
00:58:25,803 --> 00:58:28,843
And since that day, boy, I have striven,

1161
00:58:29,203 --> 00:58:32,923
with the sweat on my brow
and the strain of my sinew

1162
00:58:33,123 --> 00:58:35,939
to become the largest douchebag

1163
00:58:35,963 --> 00:58:39,123
in the history of the universe.

1164
00:58:39,483 --> 00:58:44,483
And I have done it, boy, I have done it!

1165
00:58:47,203 --> 00:58:49,459
Now where's my booze?

1166
00:58:49,483 --> 00:58:52,299
I've only had six bottles of rum today!

1167
00:58:52,323 --> 00:58:53,539
I need more!

1168
00:58:53,563 --> 00:58:55,203
Give me more!

1169
00:58:57,803 --> 00:59:00,923
Ah! Marvelous!

1170
00:59:03,683 --> 00:59:06,083
Don't you think so, Roy?

1171
00:59:08,323 --> 00:59:09,619
Well actually Robert,

1172
00:59:09,643 --> 00:59:12,643
here's an interesting
fact, interestingly enough.

1173
00:59:12,763 --> 00:59:15,139
The douchebag was a contraceptive device

1174
00:59:15,163 --> 00:59:18,603
first used by Martha Washington
in the eighteenth century.

1175
00:59:18,923 --> 00:59:20,779
Now isn't that interesting?

1176
00:59:20,803 --> 00:59:22,139
Don't you think that's interesting?

1177
00:59:22,163 --> 00:59:24,139
Am I interrupting?

1178
00:59:24,163 --> 00:59:25,299
No no no no no no no no no.

1179
00:59:25,323 --> 00:59:26,963
I'm just doing some lines.

1180
00:59:28,243 --> 00:59:30,963
Script lines.

1181
00:59:32,003 --> 00:59:35,059
You, want me to go over them with you?

1182
00:59:35,083 --> 00:59:36,499
There's no need.

1183
00:59:36,523 --> 00:59:39,523
We've already shot the scene.

1184
00:59:44,083 --> 00:59:45,539
Why are you doing them, then?

1185
00:59:45,563 --> 00:59:47,059
Oh, you know, just the usual.

1186
00:59:47,083 --> 00:59:48,859
Torturing myself.

1187
00:59:48,883 --> 00:59:51,099
Oh. Tired?

1188
00:59:51,123 --> 00:59:52,739
I didn't get any sleep last night.

1189
00:59:52,763 --> 00:59:55,459
Ohhh!

1190
00:59:55,483 --> 00:59:57,019
No. Oh.

1191
00:59:57,043 --> 01:00:00,043
I was watching TV, a
documentary on the war.

1192
01:00:00,203 --> 01:00:02,779
They kept showing the
pictures of the burning monk

1193
01:00:02,803 --> 01:00:05,803
and the naked girl with the napalm burns.

1194
01:00:05,843 --> 01:00:08,843
I can't get the images out of my mind.

1195
01:00:09,363 --> 01:00:10,483
Roy?

1196
01:00:11,483 --> 01:00:14,483
Remind me to never double date with you.

1197
01:00:16,203 --> 01:00:17,979
Have they fixed the shark, perchance?

1198
01:00:18,003 --> 01:00:21,003
Oh no, but that is not the current problem.

1199
01:00:21,043 --> 01:00:22,299
What is the current problem?

1200
01:00:22,323 --> 01:00:23,899
Oh the townsfolk.

1201
01:00:23,923 --> 01:00:27,683
The local authorities are now complaining
about the set that Joe Alves built,

1202
01:00:27,923 --> 01:00:29,739
you know - Quint Shack. What?

1203
01:00:29,763 --> 01:00:30,979
Yeah, it's thirty-eight feet high

1204
01:00:31,003 --> 01:00:33,659
and there's a twenty-four foot
limit on the local building code.

1205
01:00:33,683 --> 01:00:38,019
So they want it demolished, rebuilt
with proper concrete foundations,

1206
01:00:38,043 --> 01:00:42,259
electrical connections, waste
pipes, piles below sea level.

1207
01:00:42,283 --> 01:00:46,003
Oh, and a permit that is going to
take six months to come through.

1208
01:00:47,083 --> 01:00:48,579
But it's a fucking set.

1209
01:00:48,603 --> 01:00:50,459
It's going to be demolished in six days.

1210
01:00:50,483 --> 01:00:51,979
I know. Assholes.

1211
01:00:52,003 --> 01:00:52,940
I know.

1212
01:00:52,964 --> 01:00:55,739
God, those bastards deserve all
the bad luck that's coming their way.

1213
01:00:55,763 --> 01:00:56,939
May their limbs wither

1214
01:00:56,963 --> 01:01:00,883
and their eyeballs burst in their
skulls - as my father used to say.

1215
01:01:01,123 --> 01:01:03,659
Jesus, he sounds like a real peach.
Oh, yeah, yeah.

1216
01:01:03,683 --> 01:01:06,683
He walked out on the family on
the night of my twenty-first birthday.

1217
01:01:07,323 --> 01:01:08,603
Oh, man. I'm sorry to hear that.

1218
01:01:09,843 --> 01:01:10,340
It's fine.

1219
01:01:10,364 --> 01:01:13,339
It's not exactly as if we ever played catch

1220
01:01:13,363 --> 01:01:14,603
together.

1221
01:01:31,763 --> 01:01:34,763
Roy? What?

1222
01:01:38,243 --> 01:01:40,203
Am I any good?

1223
01:01:42,163 --> 01:01:43,419
As an actor?

1224
01:01:43,443 --> 01:01:45,979
What, are you fishing for compliments?

1225
01:01:46,003 --> 01:01:48,819
Of course I think you're good, Richard.
Well, I don't.

1226
01:01:48,843 --> 01:01:51,059
I think maybe Robert's right, I'm a fake.

1227
01:01:51,083 --> 01:01:53,499
A phoney.

1228
01:01:53,523 --> 01:01:56,843
You know, I was on set yesterday,
and I didn't know who I was.

1229
01:01:57,043 --> 01:01:59,019
I didn't feel like Hooper.

1230
01:01:59,043 --> 01:02:00,939
I didn't feel like me.

1231
01:02:00,963 --> 01:02:03,779
I just felt completely disembodied.

1232
01:02:03,803 --> 01:02:06,219
Everybody feels like that sometimes.
They do?

1233
01:02:06,243 --> 01:02:08,659
Do you ever feel like that?

1234
01:02:08,683 --> 01:02:09,779
Yeah, sure I do.

1235
01:02:09,803 --> 01:02:12,803
Yeah? Well, everyone was looking
at me yesterday like they knew!

1236
01:02:13,243 --> 01:02:14,899
Like they knew I was a fake.

1237
01:02:14,923 --> 01:02:17,459
Steven, Gottlieb, Lorraine, James,

1238
01:02:17,483 --> 01:02:20,483
Michael, everyone.

1239
01:02:20,683 --> 01:02:22,339
Has anyone said anything to you about me?

1240
01:02:22,363 --> 01:02:23,459
What are you talking about?

1241
01:02:23,483 --> 01:02:26,099
Has Steven said something
about me? Or Gottlieb?

1242
01:02:26,123 --> 01:02:28,699
Gottlieb hasn't said anything.
So Steven said something about me?

1243
01:02:28,723 --> 01:02:30,379
Neither of them have said anything!

1244
01:02:30,403 --> 01:02:33,419
Richard, I hesitate to say
this, but don't you think you're

1245
01:02:33,443 --> 01:02:35,539
being a little paranoid?
Paranoid?!

1246
01:02:35,563 --> 01:02:37,539
So that's what they're saying about me.

1247
01:02:37,563 --> 01:02:38,340
- I'm paranoid?!

1248
01:02:38,364 --> 01:02:40,659
Oh shit - oh shit - Richard?

1249
01:02:40,683 --> 01:02:41,803
Richard, are you okay?

1250
01:02:42,843 --> 01:02:43,340
I'm fine.

1251
01:02:43,364 --> 01:02:46,219
Just... just give me a minute, please.

1252
01:02:46,243 --> 01:02:48,979
Okay Richard, you are now hyperventilating.

1253
01:02:49,003 --> 01:02:51,259
That means you're exhaling
more than you're inhaling.

1254
01:02:51,283 --> 01:02:55,099
You are breathing out carbon dioxide
quicker than you're breathing in oxygen.

1255
01:02:55,123 --> 01:02:57,619
Yeah, thanks for that titbit
Roy... it's very interesting.

1256
01:02:57,643 --> 01:02:59,539
Jesus, how much of that snow
have you had this morning?

1257
01:02:59,563 --> 01:03:01,299
No no no no no no no I
haven't had any yet today!

1258
01:03:01,323 --> 01:03:04,059
Okay, that's good, you know,
you gotta stop doing that to yourself.

1259
01:03:04,083 --> 01:03:05,419
It's, it's, it's unhealthy.

1260
01:03:05,443 --> 01:03:07,459
You know, it's irresponsible.

1261
01:03:07,483 --> 01:03:09,059
You know, we're here,
we're shooting a movie,

1262
01:03:09,083 --> 01:03:11,219
there's a lot of people counting on you!
Roy!

1263
01:03:11,243 --> 01:03:14,643
WHAT THE FUCK!
Oh Jesus, calm down! No!

1264
01:03:14,683 --> 01:03:16,419
Hang on! Oh God!

1265
01:03:16,443 --> 01:03:17,060
Wait wait wait wait.

1266
01:03:17,084 --> 01:03:19,219
Okay, okay, okay.

1267
01:03:19,243 --> 01:03:21,219
Concentrate on the flame.

1268
01:03:21,243 --> 01:03:22,100
Gaaaagh!

1269
01:03:22,124 --> 01:03:23,899
Oh, jeez, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!

1270
01:03:23,923 --> 01:03:25,699
It's right here, Richard.

1271
01:03:25,723 --> 01:03:28,763
Just concentrate on the flame!
Which part?

1272
01:03:29,363 --> 01:03:31,459
The blue part or the
yellow part? WHICH PART?

1273
01:03:31,483 --> 01:03:32,779
All of it Richard!

1274
01:03:32,803 --> 01:03:35,803
Just breathe in, breathe out.

1275
01:03:36,043 --> 01:03:38,723
Concentrate on the entire flame.

1276
01:03:40,323 --> 01:03:41,260
All I can

1277
01:03:41,284 --> 01:03:44,203
see is the burning monk
you were talking about!

1278
01:03:44,243 --> 01:03:45,859
All right, stop it, Richard!

1279
01:03:45,883 --> 01:03:47,419
Everything's okay.

1280
01:03:47,443 --> 01:03:50,083
You're wonderful actor.

1281
01:03:50,563 --> 01:03:53,283
You're exactly where
you're meant to be, Richard.

1282
01:03:54,763 --> 01:03:56,323
You're wonderful.

1283
01:03:56,643 --> 01:03:58,723
You are wonderful.

1284
01:04:01,443 --> 01:04:04,443
What the holy fuck are you two doing?

1285
01:04:04,483 --> 01:04:06,859
Take it easy Robert,
Richard's having a panic attack.

1286
01:04:06,883 --> 01:04:07,340
Oh, I see.

1287
01:04:07,364 --> 01:04:10,403
I thought I'd stumble into
Woodstock for a moment!

1288
01:04:10,523 --> 01:04:12,499
I really think he needs some space, Robert.

1289
01:04:12,523 --> 01:04:15,523
Oh for God's sake, what's
the matter with you, Petunia?!

1290
01:04:15,643 --> 01:04:18,923
JUST FUCK OFF ROBERT WOULD YOU?!

1291
01:04:19,243 --> 01:04:21,443
JUST FUUUUCK OFFFFF!

1292
01:04:39,523 --> 01:04:41,899
“When, in disgrace

1293
01:04:41,923 --> 01:04:44,923
with fortune and men's eyes,

1294
01:04:46,003 --> 01:04:49,043
I all alone beweep my outcast state,

1295
01:04:51,203 --> 01:04:52,140
and trouble deaf

1296
01:04:52,164 --> 01:04:55,163
heaven with my bootless cries,

1297
01:04:55,843 --> 01:04:58,579
and look upon myself

1298
01:04:58,603 --> 01:05:01,459
and curse my fate,

1299
01:05:01,483 --> 01:05:03,283
wishing me like to one more rich in hope,

1300
01:05:04,723 --> 01:05:07,499
featured like him, like him

1301
01:05:07,523 --> 01:05:10,499
with friends possessed,

1302
01:05:10,523 --> 01:05:13,523
desiring this man's art

1303
01:05:13,763 --> 01:05:16,763
and that man's scope,

1304
01:05:17,163 --> 01:05:20,163
with what I most enjoy contented least;

1305
01:05:22,363 --> 01:05:24,859
Yet in these thoughts

1306
01:05:24,883 --> 01:05:27,883
myself almost despising,

1307
01:05:28,123 --> 01:05:31,123
haply I think on thee,

1308
01:05:31,163 --> 01:05:33,499
and then my state,

1309
01:05:33,523 --> 01:05:36,883
(Like to the lark at break of
day arising from sullen earth)

1310
01:05:37,963 --> 01:05:40,963
Sings hymns at heaven's gate;

1311
01:05:41,803 --> 01:05:44,803
for thy sweet love remembered

1312
01:05:45,163 --> 01:05:48,139
such wealth brings

1313
01:05:48,163 --> 01:05:51,019
that then I scorn to change my state

1314
01:05:51,043 --> 01:05:53,203
with kings.”

1315
01:05:59,683 --> 01:06:02,683
I wrote that when I was five.

1316
01:06:05,483 --> 01:06:06,659
Where have you been?

1317
01:06:06,683 --> 01:06:08,083
Highland Links.

1318
01:06:08,403 --> 01:06:10,603
Shot eighty-eight.

1319
01:06:12,163 --> 01:06:14,059
Is that good or bad?

1320
01:06:14,083 --> 01:06:17,683
I got two birdies on the front
nine, but I fucked up coming back.

1321
01:06:18,283 --> 01:06:19,619
Lost two balls.

1322
01:06:19,643 --> 01:06:22,283
Putting was horrendous.

1323
01:06:22,323 --> 01:06:25,019
Every time, just before
I'm about to hit my first shot,

1324
01:06:25,043 --> 01:06:29,083
I say to myself “today's
the day!” but it never is.

1325
01:06:29,483 --> 01:06:31,803
Why do you put yourself through it?
I don't know.

1326
01:06:34,323 --> 01:06:34,940
It's a modern

1327
01:06:34,964 --> 01:06:37,963
incarnation of an ancient fertility rite.

1328
01:06:39,083 --> 01:06:40,539
It was invented by sex

1329
01:06:40,563 --> 01:06:43,563
starved Scottish shepherds.

1330
01:06:44,323 --> 01:06:47,323
The ball is the sperm
and the hole is the egg.

1331
01:06:47,723 --> 01:06:51,163
You replicate the difficult and
dangerous journey to conception,

1332
01:06:51,963 --> 01:06:54,499
trying to get there first.

1333
01:06:54,523 --> 01:06:57,523
Huh. Never thought of golf that way.

1334
01:06:58,483 --> 01:07:00,419
Does it apply to other sports?

1335
01:07:00,443 --> 01:07:01,020
Probably.

1336
01:07:01,044 --> 01:07:04,163
In football, the goal is the
egg and the ball is the sperm.

1337
01:07:04,963 --> 01:07:07,963
In basketball, the hoop is the egg.

1338
01:07:08,523 --> 01:07:11,523
I don't think that it works in baseball.

1339
01:07:12,283 --> 01:07:15,363
No, because there you've got one guy

1340
01:07:16,083 --> 01:07:19,083
trying to get his sperm past another guy

1341
01:07:20,203 --> 01:07:22,539
who's trying to get his sperm out the park.

1342
01:07:22,563 --> 01:07:25,563
You're right...

1343
01:07:25,843 --> 01:07:28,843
baseball is a fruitless pursuit.

1344
01:07:32,683 --> 01:07:33,020
Well,

1345
01:07:33,044 --> 01:07:36,043
whatever fertility rite
you're performing it's

1346
01:07:36,523 --> 01:07:38,203
certainly working.

1347
01:07:41,643 --> 01:07:42,883
I need some air.

1348
01:07:55,603 --> 01:07:58,603
You are full of surprises.

1349
01:07:58,883 --> 01:08:01,459
Snifter? Oh no, thank you.

1350
01:08:01,483 --> 01:08:04,803
If I mix Jamaican rum with Irish
whisky, I wonder what it would make?

1351
01:08:05,203 --> 01:08:07,379
Trouble.

1352
01:08:07,403 --> 01:08:09,619
God he makes me feel so old.

1353
01:08:09,643 --> 01:08:11,539
You're hardly old, Robert.

1354
01:08:11,563 --> 01:08:14,419
I know but when I was his age,

1355
01:08:14,443 --> 01:08:16,539
the world was my oyster,

1356
01:08:16,563 --> 01:08:19,563
so full of possibility.

1357
01:08:21,043 --> 01:08:23,939
But it was an illusion.

1358
01:08:23,963 --> 01:08:26,619
A mirage of unknown futures

1359
01:08:26,643 --> 01:08:30,483
that all disappear once you make a choice.

1360
01:08:32,803 --> 01:08:35,339
The greatest thing about being young

1361
01:08:35,363 --> 01:08:38,659
is the falsehood that the blank canvas

1362
01:08:38,683 --> 01:08:41,683
will lead you to limitless adventure.

1363
01:08:45,723 --> 01:08:46,140
You know what,

1364
01:08:46,164 --> 01:08:49,163
I think I will have that drink now.

1365
01:08:50,763 --> 01:08:53,299
Man takes a drink.

1366
01:08:53,323 --> 01:08:56,323
Drink takes a drink.

1367
01:08:56,403 --> 01:08:59,403
Drink takes the man.

1368
01:09:24,083 --> 01:09:25,163
Mr. Scheider,

1369
01:09:25,563 --> 01:09:27,603
there are still boats in the shot.

1370
01:09:28,123 --> 01:09:29,803
Go ahead and take your lunch.

1371
01:09:39,163 --> 01:09:41,019
Here we go.

1372
01:09:41,043 --> 01:09:44,403
Let's get it up to the sun.

1373
01:09:54,563 --> 01:09:56,179
The sun is out,

1374
01:09:56,203 --> 01:09:59,203
the skies are blue.

1375
01:10:10,723 --> 01:10:11,923
Peace.

1376
01:10:47,563 --> 01:10:49,259
Mr. Scheider, the sailboat's

1377
01:10:49,283 --> 01:10:51,483
now out of shot and
the background is clear.

1378
01:10:51,683 --> 01:10:53,283
Lunch is cancelled.

1379
01:10:53,883 --> 01:10:55,259
We gotta shoot. Sending a boat over.

1380
01:10:55,283 --> 01:10:56,060
Please respond.

1381
01:10:56,084 --> 01:10:58,083
Waste of goddamn time.

1382
01:10:58,523 --> 01:11:02,123
Mr. Scheider, can you pick up, please?
Well, what do you...

1383
01:11:02,403 --> 01:11:03,499
Do you copy?

1384
01:11:03,523 --> 01:11:05,059
Yeah I copy you asshole!
Mr. Scheider?

1385
01:11:05,083 --> 01:11:06,723
Can you come in?

1386
01:11:08,083 --> 01:11:09,659
We are sending a boat, please be ready,

1387
01:11:09,683 --> 01:11:11,083
we've got to shoot!

1388
01:11:15,923 --> 01:11:18,923
Mr. Scheider, are you receiving?

1389
01:11:25,963 --> 01:11:27,323
Ready when you are!

1390
01:11:55,883 --> 01:11:57,403
Still not in there...

1391
01:11:58,443 --> 01:12:00,763
Where the bloody hell are you?

1392
01:12:08,843 --> 01:12:10,523
Had enough of the shit.

1393
01:12:11,483 --> 01:12:13,379
Come to me.

1394
01:12:13,403 --> 01:12:15,163
Oh, Christ.

1395
01:12:18,883 --> 01:12:21,203
Where the bloody hell are you?

1396
01:12:31,203 --> 01:12:32,379
What the hell are you doing?

1397
01:12:32,403 --> 01:12:34,419
Oh Christ, it's you!

1398
01:12:34,443 --> 01:12:36,859
Last month, I hid a
bottle of Lagavulin in here

1399
01:12:36,883 --> 01:12:39,979
so cunningly, with
such Machiavellian guile,

1400
01:12:40,003 --> 01:12:42,683
that I've subsequently been
completely unable to find it.

1401
01:12:44,043 --> 01:12:45,979
I mean, it's the last
day for Christ's sake.

1402
01:12:46,003 --> 01:12:49,003
You need it? Yes, I need it.

1403
01:12:49,123 --> 01:12:51,939
Okay, well, how hard can it be?

1404
01:12:51,963 --> 01:12:55,243
Like Roy said, it's not that big a boat.

1405
01:12:55,323 --> 01:12:57,099
That is a misquotation, my friend.

1406
01:12:57,123 --> 01:13:02,083
Oh Christ, I've been over every
square inch of this bloody place.

1407
01:13:02,123 --> 01:13:03,259
Well, I can help!

1408
01:13:03,283 --> 01:13:06,843
If you think I'm letting you anywhere
near my booze after that stunt you pulled!

1409
01:13:07,003 --> 01:13:08,179
No, I don't have a death wish.

1410
01:13:08,203 --> 01:13:11,203
Jeez no - I'm really good at finding stuff.

1411
01:13:11,523 --> 01:13:14,099
Oh, this, this one time we were in Italy.

1412
01:13:14,123 --> 01:13:15,259
What are you doing in Italy?

1413
01:13:15,283 --> 01:13:18,283
Oh, we traveled around
Europe a lot when I was a kid.

1414
01:13:18,483 --> 01:13:19,379
You go to Ireland?

1415
01:13:19,403 --> 01:13:20,380
Ireland? Nope. Pity.

1416
01:13:20,404 --> 01:13:23,403
It's a wonderful country.

1417
01:13:23,683 --> 01:13:23,980
Of course,

1418
01:13:24,004 --> 01:13:27,163
the people are all completely mad, but
that's what's so wonderful about them.

1419
01:13:28,603 --> 01:13:31,419
You know I once ordered
spaghetti in a Cork restaurant,

1420
01:13:31,443 --> 01:13:34,443
and when it arrived, it was
still in the shape of the can.

1421
01:13:35,443 --> 01:13:36,340
Wait.

1422
01:13:36,364 --> 01:13:38,059
They eat canned spaghetti?

1423
01:13:38,083 --> 01:13:40,819
They eat pig's trotters
and tripe and kidneys.

1424
01:13:40,843 --> 01:13:41,939
Jesus.

1425
01:13:41,963 --> 01:13:46,043
I live in County Mayo, right
by the shores of Loch Mask.

1426
01:13:47,003 --> 01:13:50,003
The water is clear enough to drink.

1427
01:13:50,523 --> 01:13:53,563
I can row across the
lake to Paddy Walsh's pub

1428
01:13:54,123 --> 01:13:57,123
and have my choice of
either Guinness or Smithwick's.

1429
01:13:58,003 --> 01:14:01,003
That is if Paddy isn't
out fishing for brown trout.

1430
01:14:01,803 --> 01:14:03,619
No, I love the Irish.

1431
01:14:03,643 --> 01:14:06,643
They're God's own people.

1432
01:14:08,083 --> 01:14:10,859
Are you sure this bottle's in here?

1433
01:14:10,883 --> 01:14:12,499
No! Oh Christ!

1434
01:14:12,523 --> 01:14:15,179
Now you've got me questioning myself.

1435
01:14:15,203 --> 01:14:18,203
Did I drink the Lagavulin?

1436
01:14:19,003 --> 01:14:21,779
You know, they could do a
marvelous games how on television -

1437
01:14:21,803 --> 01:14:26,203
get in six drinkers, get them
each to hide a bottle of scotch,

1438
01:14:26,443 --> 01:14:30,243
then drink a bottle of scotch,
then they have to find the first one!

1439
01:14:31,363 --> 01:14:32,659
Sounds great.

1440
01:14:32,683 --> 01:14:35,339
Real family fun.

1441
01:14:35,363 --> 01:14:38,403
Oh, BINGO!

1442
01:14:39,003 --> 01:14:41,139
Saints be praised!

1443
01:14:41,163 --> 01:14:44,163
You're like a truffle pig, boy!!

1444
01:14:44,323 --> 01:14:46,499
Come on.
Oh, no, no, I better not.

1445
01:14:46,523 --> 01:14:48,859
You wouldn't be refusing to
drink with me, would you, Richard?

1446
01:14:48,883 --> 01:14:49,899
Okay, okay. Fine.

1447
01:14:49,923 --> 01:14:50,459
Robert. Fine.

1448
01:14:50,483 --> 01:14:51,483
Christ.

1449
01:14:57,323 --> 01:15:00,139
Oh! That's a twelve-year-old scotch.

1450
01:15:00,163 --> 01:15:01,100
How'd you get it out here?

1451
01:15:01,124 --> 01:15:04,683
Oh, I know someone who could get
hold of moonshine in Saudi Arabia.

1452
01:15:05,123 --> 01:15:06,683
Who? Ned Lynch.

1453
01:15:07,883 --> 01:15:08,899
He sounds like a pirate.

1454
01:15:08,923 --> 01:15:11,699
Probably comes from
a long line of smugglers.

1455
01:15:11,723 --> 01:15:13,699
It keeps me out of trouble, too.

1456
01:15:13,723 --> 01:15:16,723
I fired him several times,
but he's never accepted it.

1457
01:15:17,683 --> 01:15:22,003
You know, when we first
started filming this fucking movie

1458
01:15:22,643 --> 01:15:27,163
several thousand years
ago, I thought to myself,

1459
01:15:27,883 --> 01:15:31,963
I'm going to figure out exactly
where you end and Quint begins.

1460
01:15:32,003 --> 01:15:33,859
Still not sure, eh?

1461
01:15:33,883 --> 01:15:36,123
And that's the way you like it!

1462
01:15:37,843 --> 01:15:40,843
Where's Roy by the way?

1463
01:15:41,083 --> 01:15:43,019
He's in the can.

1464
01:15:43,043 --> 01:15:46,043
I think he's regretting the
lobster bisque last night.

1465
01:15:49,203 --> 01:15:52,203
That shellfish will get you in the end.

1466
01:15:52,683 --> 01:15:54,523
Quite literally.

1467
01:15:56,123 --> 01:15:56,940
Good God,

1468
01:15:56,964 --> 01:16:00,179
it's the last day and their still
hammering on that bloody thing.

1469
01:16:00,203 --> 01:16:03,099
Do you ever feel stupid?
Do I ever feel stupid?

1470
01:16:03,123 --> 01:16:04,579
Yeah, yeah, doing this job.

1471
01:16:04,603 --> 01:16:11,619
I mean, here we are, the
shark is broken - again!

1472
01:16:11,643 --> 01:16:15,379
It's fucked, and Steven's asking

1473
01:16:15,403 --> 01:16:18,603
for all these reaction shots to
a thing that doesn't even exist!

1474
01:16:18,643 --> 01:16:21,643
I mean, it just feels so goddamn stupid!

1475
01:16:22,003 --> 01:16:26,763
You know, like when you're a little kid and
you run around the neighbourhood like Superman,

1476
01:16:28,483 --> 01:16:30,779
I don't know, it just,
it feels so childish.

1477
01:16:30,803 --> 01:16:34,723
At times I found myself utterly
depressed at how ridiculous it all is.

1478
01:16:35,803 --> 01:16:38,803
How seriously we all take ourselves;

1479
01:16:39,443 --> 01:16:42,683
fame, adulation,

1480
01:16:42,883 --> 01:16:48,283
money, agents, lawyers,
producers, merchandising,

1481
01:16:49,003 --> 01:16:51,059
it's all a crock of bullshit.

1482
01:16:51,083 --> 01:16:52,259
So you do feel stupid?

1483
01:16:52,283 --> 01:16:55,283
Of course I bloody do! All actors do.

1484
01:16:55,763 --> 01:16:58,099
You know, almost more than anything
else, I wish I'd been good enough

1485
01:16:58,123 --> 01:17:00,699
to be a first class rugby player.

1486
01:17:00,723 --> 01:17:03,763
No matter what you do in the
arts people can say they don't like it.

1487
01:17:04,643 --> 01:17:07,683
They can say “Tolstoy
is a second-rate novelist!”

1488
01:17:07,963 --> 01:17:11,523
But when you score a try,
they can't take it away from you.

1489
01:17:11,563 --> 01:17:14,459
So do you think being an actor
undermines your masculinity?

1490
01:17:14,483 --> 01:17:14,980
Oh, fucking hell.

1491
01:17:15,004 --> 01:17:16,699
I don't know, Richard. I'm not a therapist.

1492
01:17:16,723 --> 01:17:18,243
Have another drink.

1493
01:17:18,763 --> 01:17:21,099
Because Richard
Benjamin just said that acting

1494
01:17:21,123 --> 01:17:24,123
was not a fit profession for a mature man.

1495
01:17:24,323 --> 01:17:26,659
Hoffman calls it womanish.

1496
01:17:26,683 --> 01:17:28,179
Like there's something shameful about it.

1497
01:17:28,203 --> 01:17:32,123
For God's sake, Richard,
stop listening to everybody else!

1498
01:17:33,323 --> 01:17:35,099
Be fearless!

1499
01:17:35,123 --> 01:17:38,123
Follow your own goddamn star!

1500
01:17:40,683 --> 01:17:43,683
“The wind passes over us,

1501
01:17:44,523 --> 01:17:47,019
and when we are gone,

1502
01:17:47,043 --> 01:17:50,043
the earth shall know us no more.”

1503
01:17:51,443 --> 01:17:52,180
Are you okay?

1504
01:17:52,204 --> 01:17:54,163
Fuck you Richard!

1505
01:18:00,323 --> 01:18:01,619
Oh dear!

1506
01:18:01,643 --> 01:18:03,883
Oh God. Oh!

1507
01:18:05,083 --> 01:18:06,979
How you feeling, Roy?

1508
01:18:07,003 --> 01:18:09,139
Like a discarded sausage skin.

1509
01:18:09,163 --> 01:18:10,539
A swig of this should help.

1510
01:18:10,563 --> 01:18:12,059
I'd rather have a glass of water.

1511
01:18:12,083 --> 01:18:14,659
Remember what W.C.
Fields said about water, Roy...

1512
01:18:14,683 --> 01:18:16,099
You should avoid it.

1513
01:18:16,123 --> 01:18:17,403
Fish fuck in it.

1514
01:18:19,723 --> 01:18:20,923
How appropriate.

1515
01:18:21,523 --> 01:18:23,163
Wait, no, don't sit, don't sit.

1516
01:18:23,403 --> 01:18:24,843
Put this back for you.

1517
01:18:25,803 --> 01:18:27,043
There you go.

1518
01:18:27,323 --> 01:18:28,323
Go on.

1519
01:18:32,683 --> 01:18:33,260
Okay.

1520
01:18:33,284 --> 01:18:34,803
Good man.

1521
01:18:40,483 --> 01:18:43,483
Actually, I think that's a bit better.

1522
01:18:45,643 --> 01:18:46,643
Clean!

1523
01:18:53,883 --> 01:18:55,083
Roy?

1524
01:19:01,963 --> 01:19:03,579
Big wrap party tonight.

1525
01:19:03,603 --> 01:19:06,883
No, Steven doesn't go for all
that sentimental, drunken crap.

1526
01:19:07,283 --> 01:19:10,283
The hugging, the puking. Jesus.

1527
01:19:10,603 --> 01:19:12,779
And I think he suspects the
crew are planning on throwing him

1528
01:19:12,803 --> 01:19:14,779
in the drink after the final shot.

1529
01:19:14,803 --> 01:19:18,899
No, my guess is he'll be straight out of
Dodge before they get their hands on him.

1530
01:19:18,923 --> 01:19:19,923
Clever fellow.

1531
01:19:22,803 --> 01:19:23,380
I wonder if

1532
01:19:23,404 --> 01:19:26,403
this will be the one that breaks me,

1533
01:19:26,563 --> 01:19:29,499
makes me a big shot.

1534
01:19:29,523 --> 01:19:31,539
You know, I thought it would be Duddy.

1535
01:19:31,563 --> 01:19:34,603
Kravitz, but who knows,
maybe it'll be this one.

1536
01:19:34,643 --> 01:19:37,419
Don't fucking count your chickens!
This thing hasn't been edited yet.

1537
01:19:37,443 --> 01:19:40,179
You may well end up
on the cutting room floor.

1538
01:19:40,203 --> 01:19:41,619
Yeah right.

1539
01:19:41,643 --> 01:19:43,219
Like they're going to cut out the star!

1540
01:19:43,243 --> 01:19:44,739
“Star”?

1541
01:19:44,763 --> 01:19:47,299
With the caveat that you're both great,

1542
01:19:47,323 --> 01:19:50,539
and I do mean really
great, supporting players

1543
01:19:50,563 --> 01:19:53,259
but come on, let's be honest -

1544
01:19:53,283 --> 01:19:55,459
Two things! First, technically speaking,

1545
01:19:55,483 --> 01:19:59,483
Brody is the hero of this film…and
second, I dunno, maybe there isn't a star.

1546
01:19:59,523 --> 01:20:03,299
Like I said before, maybe
this is a new kind of movie.

1547
01:20:03,323 --> 01:20:05,043
Who gets top billing?

1548
01:20:06,203 --> 01:20:07,459
Where the hell did this come from?

1549
01:20:07,483 --> 01:20:08,579
My agent John Gaines.

1550
01:20:08,603 --> 01:20:10,299
It's all been approved.

1551
01:20:10,323 --> 01:20:12,643
Oh my God, he fucked us!

1552
01:20:13,603 --> 01:20:15,059
Your name's higher and in the middle.

1553
01:20:15,083 --> 01:20:18,403
Yeah, but I'm lower down on the left
where people look next - or maybe first?

1554
01:20:18,443 --> 01:20:19,140
No no!

1555
01:20:19,164 --> 01:20:21,563
Well I'm lower down
and on the fucking right.

1556
01:20:22,003 --> 01:20:25,523
Which is only good in countries
where they read from right to left.

1557
01:20:26,283 --> 01:20:28,483
I'm star in the Middle East!

1558
01:20:29,043 --> 01:20:31,363
My agent has screwed me again!

1559
01:20:32,483 --> 01:20:33,843
Fucking Zanuck and Brown!

1560
01:20:38,683 --> 01:20:40,499
So, what are you guys doing after we wrap?

1561
01:20:40,523 --> 01:20:41,579
Got anything lined up?

1562
01:20:41,603 --> 01:20:44,099
Oh, I'm reading the Goldman project.

1563
01:20:44,123 --> 01:20:47,819
- The Marathon Man.
- Oh the Nazi thing?

1564
01:20:47,843 --> 01:20:50,179
They got Hoffman for the lead.

1565
01:20:50,203 --> 01:20:51,683
They want me to play a Fed.

1566
01:20:53,003 --> 01:20:54,883
Why do I always get offered cops?

1567
01:20:54,923 --> 01:20:55,939
It's your face, Roy.

1568
01:20:55,963 --> 01:20:58,403
You've a look of incorruptibility.

1569
01:20:59,003 --> 01:21:00,619
Why thank you, Robert.

1570
01:21:00,643 --> 01:21:01,859
So what's next for you two?

1571
01:21:01,883 --> 01:21:04,883
For myself, I shall be getting the
hell out of this benighted country

1572
01:21:05,003 --> 01:21:08,003
and returning to Tourmakeady with my brood

1573
01:21:08,203 --> 01:21:10,819
to concentrate on my writing.

1574
01:21:10,843 --> 01:21:15,803
Back to the wet green grass
and the smell of the peat fire.

1575
01:21:16,003 --> 01:21:16,820
How about you, Richard?

1576
01:21:16,844 --> 01:21:19,819
Oh, well, I tell you, I'm going to
really double down on my career.

1577
01:21:19,843 --> 01:21:22,779
Cut out the partying.

1578
01:21:22,803 --> 01:21:24,979
No, it's time to get serious.

1579
01:21:25,003 --> 01:21:26,379
Do some theatre.

1580
01:21:26,403 --> 01:21:28,179
Maybe Shakespeare.

1581
01:21:28,203 --> 01:21:30,819
And Steven was telling me this
new idea for a movie he's got.

1582
01:21:30,843 --> 01:21:33,843
Oh yeah? Yeah, about UFOs.
About what?

1583
01:21:33,963 --> 01:21:35,059
You know, flying saucers.

1584
01:21:35,083 --> 01:21:37,339
Oh, you mean like a War
of the Worlds - type thing?

1585
01:21:37,363 --> 01:21:39,419
No, Steven sees the
aliens as the good guys.

1586
01:21:39,443 --> 01:21:43,043
Like they're trying to help mankind,
you know, expand our consciousness.

1587
01:21:43,083 --> 01:21:45,083
Well that sounds like
it's going to be good!

1588
01:21:46,803 --> 01:21:48,259
And Steven wants to cast you?

1589
01:21:48,283 --> 01:21:51,443
Well, I think they want Nicholson,
but he's impossible to work with.

1590
01:21:51,763 --> 01:21:53,219
No, I'll wear him down.

1591
01:21:53,243 --> 01:21:56,883
UFOs! Aliens! Jesus!

1592
01:21:58,523 --> 01:21:59,020
Whatever next?

1593
01:21:59,044 --> 01:22:00,723
Dinosaurs?

1594
01:22:01,603 --> 01:22:04,563
Can this business get any more puerile?

1595
01:22:05,643 --> 01:22:06,539
Do you think they'll make a sequel?

1596
01:22:06,563 --> 01:22:07,563
To what?

1597
01:22:08,003 --> 01:22:08,460
To this.

1598
01:22:08,484 --> 01:22:09,539
Christ, I hope not.

1599
01:22:09,563 --> 01:22:11,779
Not much more to say is there?

1600
01:22:11,803 --> 01:22:13,339
One thing's for certain.

1601
01:22:13,363 --> 01:22:16,363
If they do make a
sequel, I will not be in it.

1602
01:22:17,883 --> 01:22:19,179
Hey, never say never Roy.

1603
01:22:19,203 --> 01:22:21,819
Oh, come on, what on earth could
happen with Brody in a sequel?

1604
01:22:21,843 --> 01:22:22,420
What?

1605
01:22:22,444 --> 01:22:24,379
Another shark comes to town?

1606
01:22:24,403 --> 01:22:25,819
That's crazy!

1607
01:22:25,843 --> 01:22:29,723
Mark my words boys, one
day there will only be sequels.

1608
01:22:30,883 --> 01:22:33,883
Sequels and remakes,

1609
01:22:34,203 --> 01:22:36,739
and sequels to remakes

1610
01:22:36,763 --> 01:22:39,499
and remakes of sequels.

1611
01:22:39,523 --> 01:22:42,259
Anyway, good luck to them
bringing Quint back from the dead.

1612
01:22:42,283 --> 01:22:43,140
What?

1613
01:22:43,164 --> 01:22:46,163
You think being bitten in
half is gonna stop them?

1614
01:22:46,963 --> 01:22:48,979
They wouldn't even break a sweat!

1615
01:22:49,003 --> 01:22:52,099
They'd just have Quint's
never-before-mentioned twin

1616
01:22:52,123 --> 01:22:54,443
brother show up.
I'd sooner kill myself.

1617
01:22:58,483 --> 01:23:00,843
What do you think it's about?

1618
01:23:01,923 --> 01:23:03,083
What?

1619
01:23:04,163 --> 01:23:06,043
This movie.

1620
01:23:06,403 --> 01:23:07,180
This fucking movie.

1621
01:23:07,204 --> 01:23:10,099
I mean, it's got to be
about something, right?

1622
01:23:10,123 --> 01:23:13,123
Everything's about something.

1623
01:23:14,803 --> 01:23:17,803
I think it's about the subconscious.

1624
01:23:19,043 --> 01:23:20,179
Say again?

1625
01:23:20,203 --> 01:23:24,123
Well, sharks are these
ancient, primal creatures, right?

1626
01:23:24,843 --> 01:23:27,843
So they represent the
primal fear in all of us.

1627
01:23:28,763 --> 01:23:31,763
All the terrors and
desires, we keep hidden.

1628
01:23:32,483 --> 01:23:35,483
All the Freudian stuff my
therapists always going on about.

1629
01:23:35,523 --> 01:23:38,523
That's what the shark is.

1630
01:23:40,323 --> 01:23:41,499
What you don't agree?

1631
01:23:41,523 --> 01:23:42,500
Interesting theory!

1632
01:23:42,524 --> 01:23:44,779
Okay, so what do you think it's about?

1633
01:23:44,803 --> 01:23:46,419
Well, I think it's about responsibility.

1634
01:23:46,443 --> 01:23:50,579
When the government puts
profit before people's lives,

1635
01:23:50,603 --> 01:23:54,203
and you can't get rid of the bastards,
you got to take care of the mess yourself,

1636
01:23:54,763 --> 01:23:59,843
even if it terrifies you, for
the good of the community.

1637
01:24:01,003 --> 01:24:02,403
Woah.

1638
01:24:03,523 --> 01:24:04,683
Deep.

1639
01:24:06,643 --> 01:24:07,499
What about you, Robert?

1640
01:24:07,523 --> 01:24:08,300
What do you think it's about?

1641
01:24:08,324 --> 01:24:10,003
It's about a shark!

1642
01:24:12,403 --> 01:24:15,339
Yeah, I know that, but
what's it really about?

1643
01:24:15,363 --> 01:24:17,363
It's really about a shark!

1644
01:24:17,803 --> 01:24:18,859
Don't read any more into it.

1645
01:24:18,883 --> 01:24:21,883
It's a thriller, a machine
for making money.

1646
01:24:21,963 --> 01:24:25,363
Do you really think people are going
to be talking about this in fifty years?

1647
01:24:26,443 --> 01:24:28,163
What the hell?

1648
01:24:31,403 --> 01:24:32,459
Jesus, we've certainly

1649
01:24:32,483 --> 01:24:36,843
run the gamut in this fucking boat
over the what, last… nine weeks?

1650
01:24:38,083 --> 01:24:44,139
Poker, gin rummy, hearts,
whist, slapjack, chicken foot,

1651
01:24:44,163 --> 01:24:46,883
arm wrestling, pitch-and-toss -
Shove ha'penny?

1652
01:24:47,083 --> 01:24:48,579
Fucking shove ha'penny!

1653
01:24:48,603 --> 01:24:50,579
And tremendous fun it's been too.

1654
01:24:50,603 --> 01:24:53,363
Tremendous fun like Alcatraz.

1655
01:24:55,643 --> 01:24:58,643
I called him by the way... Harold Pinter,

1656
01:24:59,683 --> 01:25:01,483
I woke him up…

1657
01:25:02,003 --> 01:25:04,443
He said he'd rather die.

1658
01:25:04,843 --> 01:25:08,083
Gentlemen, it delights me to
be the bearer of good news.

1659
01:25:08,883 --> 01:25:11,379
They are ready for our final shot.

1660
01:25:11,403 --> 01:25:13,723
HOLY SHIT!

1661
01:25:16,123 --> 01:25:19,723
I feel like a prisoner on remand
whose sentence has just been quashed!

1662
01:25:19,803 --> 01:25:21,419
No more clam chowder.

1663
01:25:21,443 --> 01:25:22,899
No more Martha's Vineyard!

1664
01:25:22,923 --> 01:25:25,723
And no sitting on this goddamn boat!

1665
01:25:25,923 --> 01:25:28,443
You know, I gotta say, fellas,

1666
01:25:28,603 --> 01:25:30,363
I feel kind of sad.

1667
01:25:30,803 --> 01:25:32,539
Gentlemen,

1668
01:25:32,563 --> 01:25:34,819
it's been a pleasure.

1669
01:25:34,843 --> 01:25:36,283
Yeah,

1670
01:25:36,963 --> 01:25:39,779
it's been a complete fucking nightmare!

1671
01:25:39,803 --> 01:25:42,803
You know, if it wasn't for the
vanity and the mannerisms,

1672
01:25:43,123 --> 01:25:45,339
you'd be a very good actor.

1673
01:25:45,363 --> 01:25:48,723
Well, you know, if it wasn't for
the dullness and artistic pretension,

1674
01:25:49,043 --> 01:25:50,883
you'd be a very good writer.

1675
01:25:51,163 --> 01:25:53,499
Hell, I may even read one of your books.

1676
01:25:53,523 --> 01:25:54,979
Have to learn to read first, boy!

1677
01:25:55,003 --> 01:25:56,099
HAHAHA!

1678
01:25:56,123 --> 01:25:57,323
Bite me!

1679
01:26:06,163 --> 01:26:09,163
Thank you for keeping us alive, Roy.

1680
01:26:09,723 --> 01:26:13,883
I just want to say it's been
an honor working with you.

1681
01:26:14,683 --> 01:26:16,483
Thank you.

1682
01:26:17,923 --> 01:26:20,059
You know, “I'm no good at being noble,

1683
01:26:20,083 --> 01:26:23,499
but it doesn't take much to see that
the problems of three little people don't

1684
01:26:23,523 --> 01:26:26,259
amount to a hill of
beans in this crazy world.”

1685
01:26:26,283 --> 01:26:28,283
“Here's looking at you, kid.”

1686
01:26:32,723 --> 01:26:35,059
Roy, you know

1687
01:26:35,083 --> 01:26:38,083
that mass-extinction
you were talking about?

1688
01:26:39,003 --> 01:26:42,003
I suspect one is coming
for actors like you and me.

1689
01:26:42,723 --> 01:26:45,099
I fear the future belongs to a generation

1690
01:26:45,123 --> 01:26:48,123
of self-absorbed neurotics.

1691
01:26:49,003 --> 01:26:52,003
I think we'll be in good hands, Robert.

1692
01:27:25,603 --> 01:27:27,579
Okay, quiet please!

1693
01:27:27,603 --> 01:27:29,419
Camera? Rolling.

1694
01:27:29,443 --> 01:27:30,819
Sound. Speed.

1695
01:27:30,843 --> 01:27:33,219
Mark it. Scene 191, D.

1696
01:27:33,243 --> 01:27:34,859
Take two.

1697
01:27:34,883 --> 01:27:35,883
Action!

1698
01:27:36,403 --> 01:27:40,483
“Japanese submarine slammed
two torpedoes into our side, Chief.

1699
01:27:41,483 --> 01:27:44,339
We was comin' back…from
the island of Tinian to Leyte,

1700
01:27:44,363 --> 01:27:46,043
we'd just delivered the bomb.

1701
01:27:47,043 --> 01:27:49,043
The Hiroshima bomb.

1702
01:27:49,483 --> 01:27:52,459
Eleven hundred men went into the water.

1703
01:27:52,483 --> 01:27:55,483
Vessel went down in twelve minutes.

1704
01:27:57,363 --> 01:28:00,219
Didn't see the first shark
for about a half an hour.

1705
01:28:00,243 --> 01:28:02,939
Tiger. Thirteen footer.

1706
01:28:02,963 --> 01:28:05,899
You know how you know that
when you're in the water, Chief?

1707
01:28:05,923 --> 01:28:08,683
You tell by lookin' from
the dorsal to the tail.

1708
01:28:10,483 --> 01:28:12,939
What we didn't know,

1709
01:28:12,963 --> 01:28:16,043
was our bomb mission had been so secret,

1710
01:28:16,363 --> 01:28:19,923
no distress signal had been sent. Ha!

1711
01:28:25,603 --> 01:28:28,603
They didn't even list
us overdue for a week.

1712
01:28:29,483 --> 01:28:31,299
Very first light, Chief, sharks come

1713
01:28:31,323 --> 01:28:34,323
cruisin', so we formed
ourselves into tight groups.

1714
01:28:34,843 --> 01:28:37,019
Oh it was kinda like old squares

1715
01:28:37,043 --> 01:28:40,043
in a battle, like you see in a
calendar, like the Battle of Waterloo,

1716
01:28:40,523 --> 01:28:43,539
and the idea was shark
comes to the nearest man,

1717
01:28:43,563 --> 01:28:47,859
that man he start poundin'
and hollerin' and screamin' and

1718
01:28:47,883 --> 01:28:50,883
sometimes that shark he go away…

1719
01:28:52,363 --> 01:28:55,363
Sometimes he wouldn't go away.

1720
01:28:55,563 --> 01:28:57,179
Sometimes that shark
he looks right into you.

1721
01:28:57,203 --> 01:28:59,939
Right into your eyes.

1722
01:28:59,963 --> 01:29:02,739
You know the thing
about a shark is he's got…

1723
01:29:02,763 --> 01:29:06,739
lifeless eyes, black
eyes, like a doll's eyes.

1724
01:29:06,763 --> 01:29:10,683
When he comes at ya, he doesn't
seem to be livin'… until he bites ya,

1725
01:29:11,563 --> 01:29:15,323
and those black eyes
roll over white and then…

1726
01:29:16,603 --> 01:29:19,819
Then you hear that terrible
high-pitched screamin',

1727
01:29:19,843 --> 01:29:23,699
the ocean turns red, and despite
all the poundin' and the hollerin'

1728
01:29:23,723 --> 01:29:27,443
they all come in and
they… rip you to pieces.

1729
01:29:31,843 --> 01:29:35,203
You know by the end of that
first dawn, lost a hundred men.

1730
01:29:35,283 --> 01:29:36,859
I don't know how many
sharks, maybe a thousand.

1731
01:29:36,883 --> 01:29:39,043
I don't know how many men,
they averaged six an hour.

1732
01:29:40,483 --> 01:29:42,699
On Thursday mornin', Chief, I
bumped into a friend of mine,

1733
01:29:42,723 --> 01:29:44,339
Herbie Robinson from Cleveland.

1734
01:29:44,363 --> 01:29:47,339
Baseball player. Boson's mate.

1735
01:29:47,363 --> 01:29:49,163
I thought he was asleep.

1736
01:29:49,803 --> 01:29:51,683
I reached over to wake him up.

1737
01:29:52,843 --> 01:29:56,859
He bobbed up and down in the
water, he was like a kinda top.

1738
01:29:56,883 --> 01:29:58,963
Upended.

1739
01:29:59,563 --> 01:30:00,843
Well,

1740
01:30:01,843 --> 01:30:04,843
he'd been bitten in half below the waist.

1741
01:30:05,683 --> 01:30:08,579
Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper,
a Lockheed Ventura saw us.

1742
01:30:08,603 --> 01:30:12,003
He swung in low and he saw us,
young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper

1743
01:30:12,723 --> 01:30:14,643
anyway he saw us and come in low.

1744
01:30:16,323 --> 01:30:17,859
And three hours later a big fat.

1745
01:30:17,883 --> 01:30:20,883
PBY comes down and start to pick us up.

1746
01:30:22,283 --> 01:30:25,283
You know that was the
time I was most frightened?

1747
01:30:25,763 --> 01:30:28,763
Waitin' for my turn.

1748
01:30:28,843 --> 01:30:31,843
I'll never put on a life jacket again.

1749
01:30:32,523 --> 01:30:35,259
So, eleven hundred men

1750
01:30:35,283 --> 01:30:38,659
went in the water, three hundred
and sixteen men come out,

1751
01:30:38,683 --> 01:30:42,723
the sharks took the
rest, June the 29th, 1945…

1752
01:30:45,323 --> 01:30:48,643
Anyway… we delivered the bomb.

1753
01:30:55,363 --> 01:30:56,363
Cut!