-♪ (POIGNANT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ -This Fourth of July will mark America's 250th birthday.
To honor this moment, we want to take a look back
at some of the events, people, and ideas
that helped shape and preserve
our grand experiment in self-government.
Our Founding Fathers drafted a charter
to guarantee the rule of law and the rights of man.
Together, they established a new nation,
one where power resided not with a monarch,
but with ordinary citizens.
"We hold these truths to be self-evident," they wrote.
"That all men are created equal."
It was a radical idea, revolutionary even.
But what truly makes America unique
is the fact that we've always been a work in progress.
-We're not perfect. -♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC OVERLAPPING) ♪
We can be irascible, petty, selfish, cheap.
And let's face it, some of us
will always find something to complain about.
But as Americans, we have always found a way
-to overcome these naysayers... -♪ (STIRRING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
...these deeply unpleasant people
who stood in the way of progress.
These miserable, intolerable...
Did I mention petty?
Wretched--
Hey, none of that's in the script!
♪ ("THE STARS AND STRIPES FOREVER" PLAYING) ♪
SAMUEL L. JACKSON: By the winter of 1775,
the Continental Congress realized
that independence from Britain was the only course of action.
A committee of five
was charged with drafting an announcement explaining
the reasons for the rejection of the monarchy,
a declaration of independence.
They were John Adams, Thomas Jefferson,
Benjamin Franklin,
Roger Sherman, and Robert Livingston.
It's common knowledge
-that Thomas Jefferson wrote the first draft. -(QUILL SCRAWLING)
JACKSON: But actually, it was Robert Livingston
who took the first crack at it.
(CHUCKLES) And some say that's exactly what he was on
-when he wrote it. -(GAVEL POUNDING)
Gentlemen of the Continental Congress,
we finally have a first draft
of the Declaration of Independence,
written by our esteemed colleague,
Robert Livingston.
-ATTENDEE: Here, here! -(THUMPING, APPLAUDING)
Well done.
Really didn't take me that long. Only used two quills.
Two quills.
JOHN HANCOCK: We are in gratitude.
Stop it.
But we agreed that we would only have
-27 grievances. -(ATTENDEES GRUMBLING)
Then all of a sudden you added all of these other grievances.
Agreed. There are several, and they are beyond perplexing.
Mr. Jefferson, I don't think that we want to limit Rembrandt
on how many colors he can use when he paints, do we?
(ATTENDEES CHUCKLING)
But we just have a few questions
about some of the things that you wrote.
Like, "If someone invites you to a dinner party,
you are legally within your rights
as an American citizen
to ask who is coming to that dinner party
before you accept."
Don't you want to know
who you're going to be spending your evening sitting next to?
I got invited to a dinner at Madison's a few weeks ago.
Alexander Hamilton was at the same table.
Did I get a chance to talk to Hamilton?
No, because I was seated next to Madison's uncle,
-a tobacco farmer from Virginia. -(ATTENDEES GROANING)
ROBERT LIVINGSTON: What a waste of time that was,
plus the two hours getting there in the coach.
Why leave the house?
Takes two hours to get everywhere.
I wish I could put that in the document.
HANCOCK: Robert, you want to put
into this Declaration of Independence,
"It is illegal
-to share an umbrella." -(ATTENDEES GROANING, MURMURING)
If it's raining, bring your own umbrella.
Don't infringe on someone else's.
What if the umbrella holder offers to share the umbrella?
Well, if he does, he's only doing it to be nice.
He doesn't want to share it. It's not right.
You forgot your umbrella? Too bad. Too bad.
Get wet. Live with it. Don't get somebody else wet
'cause you're too stupid to bring your own.
-(ATTENDEES GROANING, MURMURING) -Sir, "After January 7th,
it is illegal to wish anyone a Happy New Year"?
-(ATTENDEES GROANING) -Precisely, Adams.
Even if it is the first time
you're encountering the person in the New Year?
That's right, Franklin. Even if it's the first time.
These "Happy New Years,"
they go on endlessly and endlessly.
January 20th, "Happy New Year." January 25th, "Happy New Year."
January 31st, "Ha--" When... When does it end?
Why is this in here?
"It is illegal to take deep breaths outside."
-(ATTENDEES GROANING) -Well, it should be.
You want to see people walking around going...
(SNIFFING) "Ah! Oh! Mm. Uh, what a beautiful day."
(SNIFFING) "Mm. Uh! Oh!"
Here's another gem. "No sharing desserts.
If you want a dessert, order it. None of this, 'Pass it around.'"
We're not animals, Mr. Franklin, all eating out of a trough.
We could all have our own forks.
Then we'll all take bites, put the forks in our mouths,
put it back in the pie after it's been in our mouths.
Mr. Franklin, it's unsanitary.
Sometimes I don't want a whole slice of pie.
I just want a taste of pie.
Get your own damn piece of pie, Franklin!
-(ATTENDEES MURMURING) -"If you pick a line...
you have to stay in it"?
Of course you have to stay in it.
Otherwise, it's just... It's chaos.
"Oh, that line's moving faster. I'll go over here.
Oh, no. Oh, oh, oh. I don't want to go here."
And now, all of a sudden, you're bumping into people,
and fights break out,
all because people want to get on the line
that's moving faster?
No. You pick your line, you stay in your line.
-That's how it works. -(ATTENDEES MURMURING)
I disagree with that,
and I don't think it should be in this document.
Oh, yeah, you don't like that, Hancock?
I guess because you don't have to wait in line.
You have your servants doing that for you.
I have servants. Do I treat them fairly?
I like to think so.
Do I spare the lash? Not always.
It's fun. It's fun, the lashing.
You smack 'em, you smack 'em, you smack 'em,
you hear a little whimper, and then you stop.
"Men shall refrain from fanning themselves in public"?
Does anybody really want to see this?
This is something you want to see men do?
This? This motion? Mr. Adams, I submit to you,
-do you want your son fanning? -Eh.
As I thought.
He doesn't want his son fanning. I don't want my son fanning.
I don't think any of you people want your sons fanning.
Who's with me? Yea or nay?
ATTENDEES: Nay!
Here's another that should not go in.
"It's illegal to tell someone about your dream.
No matter how interesting it may seem to the dreamer,
the others have no interest in hearing about it."
-(ATTENDEES MURMURING) -Gentlemen, we have a lifespan
of 38 years on this earth!
And we're going to waste it
listening to other people's dreams?
I don't think so.
I am 70 years on this earth, you fop.
Seventy? Apparently engaging in cunnilingus
with French women keeps one young.
You, sir, have discovered
-the fountain of youth. -(ATTENDEES LAUGHING)
LIVINGSTON: My congratulations to you.
"There should be a national ban on toasting"?
"No gratuities"?
"If you begin a new health routine,
keep it to yourself"?
"If you visit England,
don't suddenly return with an English accent."
"It is illegal to stroke one's beard"?
That should be in the document.
Here's a truth I hold to be self-evident.
-You, sir, are an imbecile. -(ATTENDEES LAUGHING)
Gentlemen, gentlemen, what are we doing?
These are barely grievances. They are petty complaints,
and they have nothing to do
with a declaration of independence
from England and tyranny.
-ATTENDEES: Here, here! -(THUMPING, APPLAUDING)
This is not just a declaration of independence.
This is a declaration of common sense.
In 250 years, our descendants will thank us
for the great work that we've done here,
making their lives immeasurably better.
Gentlemen, are you with me?
-Yea or nay? -ATTENDEES: Nay!
-A thousand times nay. -Hmm.
Mr. Livingston, thank you so much
for all of your hard work,
but I don't think that any of this
is going into our declaration.
-Jefferson, want to take a shot? -Yeah, I'll do it.
(CHUCKLES) I won't be using any of this,
especially, "No clapping along to the music
and expecting others to join in."
(ATTENDEES LAUGHING)
-Marshals, escort him out. -That won't be necessary.
Because I don't want to live in a country
where people share umbrellas...
-♪ (STIRRING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ -...take deep breaths outside,
change lines willy-nilly,
fan themselves, stroke their beards,
share dreams and desserts.
Happy New Year, assholes!
♪ (LIVELY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-♪ (INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ -JACKSON: On March 7th, 1876,
Alexander Graham Bell successfully received a patent
-for a device he called the telephone. -(GEARS WHIRRING)
JACKSON: Days later, in front of the public,
he made the first ever telephone call
-to his assistant, Thomas Watson. -(TELEPHONE RINGING)
JACKSON: The first phone call
was a glorious day for American innovation.
Alas, not so much for Bell.
♪ (INTRIGUING MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
-(CHATTER STOPS) -♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
On behalf of my wife, Mabel,
I would like to welcome you to our home.
Thank you for coming.
What you are about to witness has never been seen before
-in human history. -♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
I give you...
the telephone.
-(SPECTATORS GASPING) -♪ (MUSIC STOPS) ♪
My assistant Watson is in another building,
out of sight and sound.
But with this device,
I will be able to communicate with him...
as if he was standing right next to me.
(SPECTATORS GASPING)
I will pick up the phone on my side,
-and it will ring on his. -What kind of ring?
Normal ring. It's just a ring. It's a ring.
It's a typical ring.
Maybe there could be a menu of rings
that people could choose from.
Oh, yes. I would like mine to sound like a doorbell.
I'd like mine to sound like a clown horn.
MABEL GARDINER HUBBARD: Or perhaps a bicycle ring, you know?
-(IMITATES BICYCLE BELL) -Oh! All... All wonderful ideas,
but hardly the point.
The point is, I'll be able to communicate with someone
who is miles away.
What if I'm at a piano recital, say,
and I don't want it to ring, so it just vibrates
like a... like a Jew's harp in your pocket?
(SPECTATORS GASPING)
Ah! Oh, that's just a fascinating idea.
Oh, what if you could send short little mess--
What if you invent your own? Go off and invent your own.
That's not this.
You want something that vibrates? Go!
Go invent it! This is all nonsense!
Does anybody else have anything else they'd like to add?
Are colors available?
-Or could it play like a song? -(SPECTATORS MURMURING)
Are you done?
Would you like to see a demonstration?
-Yes, yes. -SPECTATOR 1: Please.
We don't know why it's taking so long.
Would you please get out?
-Me? -ALEXANDER GRAHAM BELL: You.
-Yes, you. -Oh! Oh, okay.
-Thank you. Lovely party. -You. You!
-Get out! -Thank you. Thank you so much.
-BELL: Get out! -SPECTATOR 2: Thanks.
Who the hell is she?
-MABEL: I have no idea-- -What is she doing here?
I hate her! I don't even feel like doing it now.
-(SPECTATORS GROANING) -Oh, please!
I don't even want to do it.
Yes, you do want to do it.
You worked on it night and day for months and months.
Sorry, I just thought of one more thing
-that would be so fun-- -Shut up!
-Do you want to see this or not? -MABEL: Yes, very much.
-(SPECTATORS MURMURING) -Really? 'Cause it doesn't seem like you do.
-MABEL: Everybody-- -It doesn't seem like you do.
It seems like you just want
-to hear yourselves talk. -(SPECTATORS MURMURING)
Is that what you want? Is that what you came here for?
(SPECTATORS MURMURING)
-God damn it! -MABEL: Darling.
BELL: (SOFTLY) Fucking assholes!
(SIGHS)
-(SWITCH CLICKS) -(ELECTRICITY HUMMING)
-Mr. Watson, can you hear me? -♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-Indeed I can, Alexander. -♪ (MUSIC TURNS JUBILANT) ♪
-(LAUGHS) He can hear me! -(SPECTATORS APPLAUDING)
BELL: He can hear me! Watson!
This is a step forward
in science and communication.
I could not have done it without your able assistance.
-It is a time for celebration. -BELL: (OVER TELEPHONE) Indeed.
-So, um... -♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪
(HESITATES) What are... What are you doing?
-Not a lot. -BELL: Uh-huh.
THOMAS WATSON: Um...
I'm sitting on a chair.
Yeah, yeah. (CHUCKLES)
Yeah, me too. Me too. I'm on a chair.
-Uh, well... -(SPECTATOR CLEARS THROAT)
Okay. Okay.
Alexander, do you remember
when we went to that science convention?
-Where was that? -Cleveland.
WATSON: We were at that hotel.
Do you remember all of the hedges,
the topiary work that was done?
That landscaper was amazing.
-Yes, it was-- -WATSON: There were elephants
and seals,
-and there was the giraffe... -Yeah.
...and I think they used a tree for the giraffe's neck,
which I don't think it's fair.
I think when you are doing topiary work,
you should be a purist.
-You only use the hedges. -Yeah, okay, all right--
And the gardens!
-The gardens were beautiful. -(SPECTATOR COUGHS)
You picked some lilies, which I didn't think was right.
Yeah, all right. Okay.
-WATSON: But you don't pick flowers... -All right, we're good.
-...from someone else's garden. -We're good.
I gotta take off, but, uh--
Oh, oh! You know what I've been meaning to tell you?
Yeah, all right. Watson, um,
I got some people here. I gotta get going.
-My cousin sent me a letter. -Oh, my God.
WATSON: He met some people
with the last name Grahamm, but two M's.
-(GROANS) -WATSON: I put the letter aside.
You don't spell it ever with two M's, do you?
-Watson, shut up! -No. Why would you--
-BELL: Shut up, Watson. -That's a hat on a hat.
Okay, they got two M's.
-WATSON: Yeah, but see-- -Watson, I got people here.
-WATSON: You know, you only-- -I gotta get off the phone.
You only use two M's if you have to say "mm,"
or "yummy."
Do you know any Grahams that spell with two M's?
No, I don't know any Grahams.
I don't know any Grahams with one M.
I don't know any Grahamms with two M's.
I don't know any Grahammms with three M's.
-(RECEIVER CLUNKS) -(METAL CLANGS)
-(SPECTATORS MURMURING FAINTLY) -(SIGHS)
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
I think we got cut off. Do you remember the ducks
and the little ducklings followed behind?
But that was adorable.
It just hit me when we were off--
♪ (LIVELY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-♪ (MARTIAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ -JACKSON: The First World War began in 1914
and pitted the Central Powers, Germany, Austria-Hungary,
Bulgaria, and the Ottoman Empire,
against the Allied powers,
France, Russia, Italy, Great Britain, Romania,
Canada, and Japan.
The United States joined the allies in 1917
-after Germany sank many American ships... -(SHIP HORN BLARING)
...including the luxury cruise liner, The Lusitania,
which carried hundreds of American passengers.
-(SOLDIERS YELLING) -JACKSON: Nothing encapsulates the horrors of this war
more than trench warfare,
-with its unprecedented levels of destruction and carnage. -(ARTILLERY FIRING)
JACKSON: By the end of the war,
more than 16 million people were dead.
So many soldiers bravely fought
and died for their country.
Of course, there were exceptions.
♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(SIGHS) I don't think I can do this.
I've lost so many friends already.
The good news is now you don't have to worry
-about keeping in touch. -♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪
Hey, if I don't make it back, I need you to do me a big favor.
Can you... Can you deliver this letter
to my girl, Greta?
-Me? -PRIVATE WALLACE: I have a few more lines
-I need to get down. -(SCOFFS)
Listen, I'm very flattered.
That's very nice of you to think of me in that light,
but, uh, you got the wrong guy. I'm a-- I'm very irresponsible.
I... I lose stuff all the time.
One day, I was looking around for my glasses,
and they were on my head the whole day.
-I was looking for hours and hours. -SOLDIER 1: Incoming!
-(EXPLOSION) -Ah!
WALLACE: It has to be you. Please.
PRIVATE DAVID: I can mail it, right?
No, I need you to deliver this in person.
-Where does she live? -Albuquerque.
Albuquerque? Are you kidding?
WALLACE: Thanks, David. I'm gonna go finish this up.
Hey! Albuquerque?
I-- Why don't you get Wojokowski?
He lives in Santa Fe.
-Wojo! Anybody seen Wojo? -SOLDIER 2: No, sorry.
-You seen Wojo? -No, no.
I was just saying I can't wait to get back home to my Daisy.
-(DAVID SIGHS) -PRIVATE SMITH: That's what's waiting for me.
-Ah. -What does that noise mean?
Yeah. Yeah. (MUMBLES INDISTINCTLY)
-She's all right. -Do you not think she's pretty?
No. Yeah, she's all right. Yeah.
She's "all right"?
-Yeah, if you like her. -SMITH: Yeah.
-You like her? -Yeah, yeah.
-There you go. Okay. -Okay.
But you don't think she's pretty?
I would take her to the movies if she paid.
If she didn't pay... Mm, not so sure.
I don't know. Hey, she's not my type.
-Right. -We all have types.
-Okay. -She's your type.
Yeah, what's your type?
(MUMBLES INDISTINCTLY) Yeah. Yeah.
More noises. Why are-- Why?
Sometimes noises can be very expressive.
How hard is it to just say yes?
I say, "Is she pretty?" You say, "Yes," and we move on.
Yeah, yeah. You know, you startled me into honesty.
If you had come up to me ten minutes ago and said,
"Hey, in ten minutes, I'm gonna show you
a picture of my girlfriend,"
I could have come up with a lie
that would have made you very happy.
-So, it's my fault? -Mm... eh.
-What does the noise mean? -Most likely.
-(SERGEANT BLOWS WHISTLE) -♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-All right, men. It's time. -SOLDIER 3: It-- It's Sarge.
I need you to say your prayers and prepare to charge.
On my command, you will go over the top
into no man's land.
You will sprint through a hail of bullets,
and you will get to Fritz
and you will go doolally on those bastards.
Oh, we're gonna doolally. I'm a doolally-er.
-I'm a doolally-er. -SERGEANT: Can I get a doolally?
-A doolally. -SOLDIERS: Doolally!
Are you ready to go lick the Kaiser?
Oh. (ULULATING) Lick a, lick a, lick a, lick a! Ooh, lick 'em.
Lick the Kaiser.
-Charge. -DAVID: Charge.
-(SOLDIERS YELLING) -SERGEANT: Up and over. Over the top. Come on, men.
-Let's go. -After you. Go ahead. After you.
Come on, David. Get up there.
-Come on. Keep going. -Mommy!
-(EXPLOSIONS) -(SOLDIERS CLAMORING)
♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-(RAPID MACHINE GUN FIRE) -(SOLDIERS YELLING)
-(WHIMPERS) -(SOLDIERS YELLING)
-(WHIMPERS) -(SOLDIER SCREAMS)
-(WHIMPERS) -SERGEANT: Private David,
-move your ass! -(SCREAMS)
-Come on, men! Let's go! -(GROANS)
-SERGEANT: Keep moving! -(SOLDIERS YELLING)
(EXPLOSION)
(SOLDIERS SCREAMING)
-♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪ -(SOLDIER GROANS)
Private Wallace, stop playing with yourself
-and move out. -WALLACE: Yes, sir.
SMITH: Uh, just a sec, Sarge.
All right.
(FLY BUZZING)
(SOLDIER GROANING)
(GRUNTS)
(GASPS, LAUGHS) I'm alive!
(GASPS)
-Oh, my God! -Uh-huh.
-I'm alive! Oh, thank you, God! -SMITH: What happened?
-What happened? -What? I got shot!
-SMITH: Uh-huh. -I got shot!
Where? I don't see a... a bullet hole anywhere.
Huh? Oh.
-SMITH: Uh-huh. -Wow.
The bullet must have gone right through me.
-Uh-huh. -It's a miracle.
-I'll get the medic. -The medic? No, no, no, no.
Don't bother the medic. He's got limbs to saw off.
He's got a lot of work to do.
-No medics whatsoever. -Uh-huh.
You seem totally fine.
DAVID: You know what must have happened?
I think a bullet whizzed by my head.
-Uh-huh. Yeah. -(MIMICS BULLETS WHIZZING)
-And I lost consciousness. -Wow.
You seem really very, very healthy, put together.
I was dead. I believed I was dead.
-But no bullet, but dead. -DAVID: No.
You know, I thought it was the afterlife.
You're still kind of trapped
in your own head in the afterlife.
You're still yourself, a person you don't really like that much.
So, the afterlife is no bonus.
-There is an afterlife... -SMITH: Uh-huh.
...but not the bonus that you would want.
Can I propose a different theory?
Sure.
I think you pretended to get shot
and then laid down there
while the rest of us were getting shot at.
That is without a doubt
the most insulting, disgusting thing
anyone has ever said to me
-in my life. -Uh-huh.
How dare you? How dare you? Oh, okay. I think I get it.
This is about what I said about Daisy, right?
Yeah, for sure. I've really been thinking about it.
And I've been reevaluating the entire situation.
And my assessment was so off.
I don't even know what I was talking about.
She's a beauty.
Do you realize how lucky you are?
Not only would I take her to the movies and pay for her,
I would take her to dinner and pay for her.
I would buy champagne,
and I would walk her to her door.
And if she invited me in, oh, well, you better believe...
-No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. -...I would go running in.
-Too far. It's too far. That is too far. -I would go--
Is there a way to make a copy of a picture like that?
No. So, you didn't pretend to get shot
and then lay on the ground like a little baby?
Fuck, no. Fuck that! Come on, man.
-I'll charge anytime. -SMITH: Really?
-I love war. -SMITH: You love it?
This... This to me, this is living.
-Uh-huh. -DAVID: This is living.
-SMITH: Right. -I feel alive.
You know what? This is perfect.
You should volunteer to lead the next charge.
No, I'm... I'm... I'm a charger, not a leader.
-Hey, Sarge. -Hey, what the fuck?
SMITH: David wants to lead the charge.
DAVID: I never s-- No, I'm not a leader.
-That's outstanding. -DAVID: I'm a charger.
-I'm not a leader. -SERGEANT: I didn't think you had the balls.
-I'm not-- I don't. I don't. -It appears that you do.
No, no, but I don't. He's... He's just saying that.
-Come on. Show us your balls. -DAVID: I... I don't--
-Come on. -DAVID: I-- What?
-Are you crazy? -SERGEANT: Come on. Come on now.
I can't lead a charge.
First of all, I have a limp and very undependable bowels.
SOLDIER: (GRUNTS) Easy.
Private David, seems I underestimated you.
Here you are. You're gonna lead us into battle.
-What? Me? -That's right.
I... I can't carry the flag. I'm too full from breakfast.
-Nonsense. -DAVID: What?
You're the standard bearer for the regiment.
-Carry the flag? -That's right.
It's like carrying a banner that says, "Shoot me."
-It's an honor. -What? It's an--
I... I don't need any honors.
-I'm a very modest person. -Take the flag.
(MUMBLES INDISTINCTLY) No, you take it.
-SERGEANT: You take it. You! -DAVID: No, no.
-WALLACE: Sarge wants me to take a look. -SMITH: All right.
Jesus! Half a hard-on, bastard! You're gonna take this flag,
or I'm gonna stuff this pole up your ass.
-Okay. -(GUNSHOT CRACKS)
-(BULLET THUDS) -(GRUNTS)
SMITH: They shot Wallace.
-(GROANS) -♪ (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(GROANS)
(WHIMPERS)
(GROANS)
(GROANS LOUDLY)
(IN STRAINED VOICE) In person.
(WHEEZING)
(SIGHS)
♪ (LIVELY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
-JACKSON: On December 1st 1955... -♪ (SLOW BLUES MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
...Rosa Parks was coming home by bus in Montgomery, Alabama,
when she refused to give up her seat to a White man
in violation of the city's "Negroes in back" policy,
where the front of the bus was reserved for Whites only.
But Rosa would not move.
-She was arrested... -(CELL DOOR CLANKS SHUT)
...and her actions inspired the Black community
to organize the Montgomery Bus Boycott,
-led by a young Martin Luther King, Jr. -♪ (INDISTINCT SINGING) ♪
JACKSON: It lasted more than a year
until the U.S. Supreme Court ruled
that bus segregation was unconstitutional.
-(GAVEL POUNDING) -JACKSON: What Rosa Parks did on that bus
made her a nationally recognized symbol of dignity and strength
in the struggle to end racial segregation.
But it's a little-known fact
that she had tried this once before.
♪ (INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
(COINS CLINKING)
(CLEARS THROAT)
(PASSENGER SIGHS)
(COINS CLINKING)
(SIGHS)
Excuse me?
Driver.
-Get on to the back. -No.
I said to get on to the back of the bus.
And I said, "No."
Well, I'm gonna have to have you arrested.
-Well, go on and do so. -All right, then.
Seriously, we're not doing this, okay?
I'm very comfortable here.
If she gets up, that means I have to get up.
And then he's gonna slide in. He may even want the aisle seat.
Maybe I'll get in a fight with him. It's ridiculous.
She's sitting here. Get in the back. Come on.
Move it out. You too.
-You, go ahead. Drive. Come on. -(SCOFFS)
Yeah. (SCOFFS) ...you. Go ahead.
-(MUNCHES LOUDLY) -(BUS DOORS CLOSING)
-That was very kind. -Needed to be said.
Amen.
(MUNCHES LOUDLY)
-Where you heading? -The market.
-The market? -Mm-hmm.
Do a big shop. You got a big shop going, huh?
-Is it a big shop? -(CHUCKLES) No.
What are you gonna get?
-Vegetables, some peaches. -Oh! What's your name?
-Rosa. -I'm Murray.
-Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you, Rosa.
You know, I had an Aunt Rosa.
-Mm. -Lovely woman.
And I must say, she was quite voluptuous.
She had a bawdy sense of humor.
You could see how that could spark
the imagination of a 12-year-old boy. (CHUCKLES)
About your own aunt?
-Yeah. -Did she marry into the family?
Oh, no. My mother's sister.
Huh.
MURRAY: Would you do me a favor?
I just want to take this sweater off.
Could you pull that sleeve?
-(GRUNTS) -(GRUNTS) Sir, it's...
-Oh, you-- -You're sweating a little bit.
-Thank you. Oh, that's better. -All right. There you go.
-(SIGHS) -Thank you.
Let me ask you this question.
-You're in somebody's house... -(SIGHS)
...and your back is really itching.
If you saw a back scratcher,
would you use the back scratcher,
or would you rub it against a corner and try and,
you know, get it... get it yourself?
-No, I... I wouldn't use it. -Oh, yeah.
That's like using someone's toothbrush.
I disagree, Rosa. The back is not a mouth.
-(SIGHS) -MURRAY: How about this?
If there wasn't a back scratcher,
you know what I would do? I'd go into the kitchen,
-I'd get a fork... -Uh-oh.
-...I'd go into the bathroom... -No.
-...scratch the back... -(SIGHS)
-Jesus. -...wash the fork, return it,
and, oh, boy, Rosa,
there's no greater feeling in the world
than scratching your back with a fork.
-There you go. Problem solved. -You have anything to read?
-(PASSENGERS CHUCKLING) -MURRAY: No.
I guess I should bring stuff to read on the bus, right?
Instead of just sitting here looking around like an idiot.
-I like to read. -Do you live alone?
-You know, Rosa, I do. -Oh.
I have a lot of plants.
Most of them are dead because I ignore them.
And I have a parakeet who says my name.
(IMITATES PARAKEET) "Murray! Murray!
Murray! Murray!
How's Murray?"
You like the sound of your own voice?
-Very much so. -♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
Hey, Rosa, who's Paul Bunyan?
Do we like him or not? I know he was a big guy.
People tell me you can't eat all parts of a lobster,
but I don't find that to be true.
What?
You never see a pie cooling on a windowsill
like you do in the movies. And believe me... (CHUCKLES).
...I've looked in a lot of windows.
Why are you looking through windows? For a pie?
Did you see Dragnet last night?
I knew who did it from the first minute.
♪ (IMITATES "DRAGNET" THEME) ♪
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
-Might I ask you a question? -(QUIETLY) Oh, Jesus.
If you got robbed, would you prefer
that it was a Black man or a White man who robbed you?
Good question, right?
Very interesting. Think about it.
The sociological aspects of that.
Why would I want to think about being robbed?
I know, but if you had to. Interesting--
Why do you think about these things?
-(HESITATES) It just... It just occurred to me. -Are you a praying man?
I think it's a waste of time, really.
We should pray for your thoughts.
-Pray for my thoughts? -Yes.
It might bring you some peace and quiet.
-Do you sense I need peace? -I do.
-What gives you that impression? -Just about everything.
-Okay. -Come on,
-we gonna close our eyes? Come on now. -Close my eyes?
-Okay. My eyes are closed. Okay, yeah. -Close your eyes.
(SIGHS) Oh, Father God, we pray for Mr. Murray today, Lord.
-Usher in your spirit. Cover him. -(MUNCHES LOUDLY)
-Bring him peace of mind, God. -Yeah.
-Silence his thoughts. -(MUMBLES INDISTINCTLY)
And now, Murray, would you like to share anything with the Lord?
-Oh, yeah, yeah. Sure. Yeah. -Yeah, you take over.
Yeah, you know, Lord, you must be aware
that I really haven't had sex in about eight years, so...
-Oh, Jesus. -You know that.
So maybe you could help me out a little bit,
send somebody my way.
You know, I'm not that particular.
She could be a little overweight.
Don't send me an elephant, of course,
-but, you know, reasonably overweight is fine. -(WHISPERS INDISTINCTLY)
MURRAY: I don't care.
Maybe even a redhead would be nice.
You know, I... I don't-- Yeah, redhead.
Hey, Rosa. Hey, where are you going?
I'm going to the back of the bus,
but you keep praying, Murray.
-Come on, y'all. Deal me in. -(PASSENGERS CHEERING)
Anyway, like I was saying,
a redhead, that would be spectacular.
Really. Not too many freckles, though.
♪ ("THE STARS AND STRIPES FOREVER" PLAYING) ♪
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪