1 00:00:08,175 --> 00:00:13,221 Who books a flight from Stansted at 5:45 in the morning? 2 00:00:13,222 --> 00:00:14,972 They're probably still asleep. 3 00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:17,266 You know, Ryanair's an Irish airline. 4 00:00:17,267 --> 00:00:19,352 I thought you'd like that. 5 00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:20,978 Ryanair's for the English, Ruari. 6 00:00:20,979 --> 00:00:22,688 It's how we get our revenge on them for war, 7 00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:24,565 and famine, and Russell Brand. 8 00:00:24,566 --> 00:00:26,568 - Well, you told me to book it. - I didn't tell you to-- 9 00:00:27,819 --> 00:00:29,820 Oh, shit. Oh, my God, I am so-- 10 00:00:29,821 --> 00:00:32,365 - Hey! You made it! - Oh, my God! Yeah! 11 00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:34,450 - Get on in! - Come on! Let's do it! 12 00:00:34,451 --> 00:00:36,077 - Yes! - Whoo! 13 00:00:36,078 --> 00:00:37,662 Should've brought you this! 14 00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:39,247 It's okay to drink this early in the morning, isn't it? 15 00:00:39,248 --> 00:00:40,666 Of course, it is! 16 00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:44,168 - Paradise, isn't it, Ruari? - Yeah. 17 00:00:44,169 --> 00:00:45,336 - Hey. - Hey. 18 00:00:45,337 --> 00:00:47,296 Come here. Happy 10 years to you both. 19 00:00:47,297 --> 00:00:48,881 And can I just say, your marriage doesn't look 20 00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,216 a day over... 21 00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:51,051 five. 22 00:00:51,927 --> 00:00:52,843 Mum. 23 00:00:52,844 --> 00:00:54,679 - Can you-- I wanna-- - Huh? 24 00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:56,889 - Where's my room? - Can you-- 25 00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:58,724 Where's Ruari's room so he can... 26 00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:00,310 Oh, you're both in the outhouse. 27 00:01:01,186 --> 00:01:03,145 We're both in the outhouse? 28 00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:05,523 It's charming as fuck, Al, you'll love it. 29 00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:07,441 Hey, Ruari, back through the house 30 00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:09,277 on the left there's a path. Just follow that down. 31 00:01:09,278 --> 00:01:11,613 Only thing, the Wi-Fi's a bit iffy. 32 00:01:13,657 --> 00:01:15,284 I'll get you more data. 33 00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:19,579 - What if I pull? - Who would you pull? 34 00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:21,914 A local? I don't know. 35 00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:23,332 James Blunt? 36 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:25,168 Sorry, sweetie, first come, first served. 37 00:01:26,628 --> 00:01:28,671 Where are all these room stealers, anyway? 38 00:01:28,672 --> 00:01:30,548 Lorcan and Theresa are out "making love." 39 00:01:30,549 --> 00:01:32,800 Ugh. Barf. 40 00:01:32,801 --> 00:01:34,761 I really wish you hadn't kept my ex in the divorce. 41 00:01:35,846 --> 00:01:38,264 In fun news, the airline lost Theresa's luggage. 42 00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:39,807 She's already borrowed my knickers. 43 00:01:39,808 --> 00:01:41,685 Patrick and Cara are around somewhere as well. 44 00:01:48,483 --> 00:01:49,610 Ugh, God. 45 00:01:51,403 --> 00:01:53,362 Hey! Hi. 46 00:01:53,363 --> 00:01:55,157 Oh, I'm gonna-- oh! 47 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,994 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 48 00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:12,465 You missed the top of my shoulder there, babe. 49 00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:13,967 Oh, sorry. 50 00:02:16,845 --> 00:02:18,387 Little boys' room. 51 00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:19,764 That's the third time you've been. 52 00:02:19,765 --> 00:02:22,350 Yeah, well, it's a liquid-heavy holiday, babe. 53 00:02:22,351 --> 00:02:24,018 You better not be doing what I think you're doing. 54 00:02:24,019 --> 00:02:25,686 What? Would I? 55 00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:27,438 Hey! 56 00:02:27,439 --> 00:02:29,231 - Hey, gorgeous. - Hey. 57 00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:31,193 Oh. Pull up a bed, Nana Mouskouri. 58 00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:35,321 Oh, wow. You look insane. 59 00:02:35,322 --> 00:02:37,782 Oh, and a buenas tardes to you, too. 60 00:02:37,783 --> 00:02:40,284 I heard about your luggage fiasco. 61 00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:42,286 - That sucks. - Yeah, thank you. 62 00:02:42,287 --> 00:02:44,122 You just never think it's gonna happen to you. 63 00:02:45,582 --> 00:02:47,249 It's not cancer. 64 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:48,669 Hey, Ruari! 65 00:02:50,253 --> 00:02:53,381 My man. How have you been? 66 00:02:53,382 --> 00:02:55,549 Yeah, you'd know if you called me back. 67 00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:57,551 I'm sorry, buddy. It's the show. 68 00:02:57,552 --> 00:02:59,428 The prep is all-consuming. 69 00:02:59,429 --> 00:03:01,389 I -can't even really relax on holiday. 70 00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:03,265 - I can't get a tan. - Why can't you tan? 71 00:03:03,266 --> 00:03:07,353 Because if I had a tan in space, it wouldn't be authentic. 72 00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:08,771 I'll tell you what's not authentic. 73 00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:09,898 Spaceship battles. 74 00:03:10,732 --> 00:03:12,067 Well, that's your opinion. 75 00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:17,988 - Babe, you didn't... - What the fuck? 76 00:03:17,989 --> 00:03:19,031 Oh, yeah. 77 00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:20,367 - Right. - Ignoring me. 78 00:03:27,791 --> 00:03:30,168 Just-- I'm in the sun a bit. 79 00:03:31,253 --> 00:03:32,963 Just gonna move this. 80 00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:36,841 Oh, my God, stop it! 81 00:03:36,842 --> 00:03:38,843 Oh! It's-- no. 82 00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:40,136 I am trying to read. 83 00:03:40,137 --> 00:03:41,263 - Trying to read. - I'm sorry. 84 00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:46,434 Jesus, Alex. 85 00:03:46,435 --> 00:03:49,311 You're on a mattress in the sun. Relax. 86 00:03:49,312 --> 00:03:50,772 Okay. Yeah. 87 00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:58,113 - Theresa! - Hm? 88 00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:03,451 Yep. Get used to it. 89 00:04:03,452 --> 00:04:04,536 I love you, too. 90 00:04:08,165 --> 00:04:11,083 We'll go for lunch in town once we're a bit more scorchio-ed. 91 00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:12,294 Yeah. 92 00:04:33,607 --> 00:04:34,857 This is fun, isn't it? 93 00:04:34,858 --> 00:04:37,402 Yeah. This is great. 94 00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:49,330 I just feel like this is it. 95 00:04:49,331 --> 00:04:50,456 - Hey. - Are you saying we're lost? 96 00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:51,624 How's it going? 97 00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:53,209 Where's Cara? 98 00:04:53,210 --> 00:04:55,461 She had trouble choosing her outfit, 99 00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:57,463 so I left her to it. 100 00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,423 Oh, hey, I'll catch you up. 101 00:04:59,424 --> 00:05:01,091 I'm gonna get some... 102 00:05:01,092 --> 00:05:02,802 Order me something oily and alcoholic. 103 00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:04,221 Frank's taken. 104 00:05:05,180 --> 00:05:06,014 You don't smoke. 105 00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:08,307 Yeah, I do in Spain. 106 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:09,809 Only in Spain? 107 00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:11,477 Well, occasionally in London, you know, 108 00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:13,479 if it's a hot summer night, and then, you know, 109 00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:15,481 sometimes on Christmas Day if I've had to cook. 110 00:05:15,482 --> 00:05:16,899 - Yeah. - And when Delly had cancer as well. 111 00:05:16,900 --> 00:05:18,567 - Throughout COVID. - Yeah. 112 00:05:18,568 --> 00:05:20,945 - But really, mostly only in Spain. - Only in Spain. 113 00:05:20,946 --> 00:05:23,405 Oh, my God! I bumped into Ekin-Su 114 00:05:23,406 --> 00:05:25,533 from Season Eight, Love Island. Mad. 115 00:05:25,534 --> 00:05:26,867 We DM on Insta. 116 00:05:26,868 --> 00:05:28,536 What did you just say just there? 117 00:05:28,537 --> 00:05:29,954 Oh, you're so funny. 118 00:05:29,955 --> 00:05:31,413 Is this okay for a little lunch? 119 00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:33,041 - Mm. - Great. 120 00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:37,838 - Oh, that's nice. - Yeah. I think you look great in it. 121 00:05:41,633 --> 00:05:43,050 Can I get another one of those 122 00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:44,594 and some red down that end as well, please? 123 00:05:45,971 --> 00:05:46,887 So, maybe-- 124 00:05:46,888 --> 00:05:48,639 I don't know if I'm that hungry, you know, so... 125 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:51,058 Ah, well, maybe if you stop putting appetite suppressants 126 00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:53,228 up your nose for this one meal. 127 00:05:55,313 --> 00:05:58,607 Yeah, could we share the paella por dos? 128 00:05:58,608 --> 00:05:59,942 - Paella para dos. - Oh. Should we do that? 129 00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:00,777 Sure. 130 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:04,613 - And water, sin gas, please. - Thank you. 131 00:06:04,614 --> 00:06:07,741 Yeah, we'll have the paella for two, too. 132 00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:10,077 Oh, very organized table. I like. 133 00:06:10,078 --> 00:06:11,371 And for you, my darling? 134 00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:15,416 Are all the paellas, they come between two? 135 00:06:15,417 --> 00:06:17,459 - We do nice, big paellas. - Okay. 136 00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:18,295 Do you wanna share that with me? 137 00:06:19,004 --> 00:06:20,630 No. I'll get the burger, please. 138 00:06:22,257 --> 00:06:25,634 Okay, well, at this lovely seafood restaurant, I'll have the... 139 00:06:25,635 --> 00:06:27,136 Alex, why don't you just share some of ours? 140 00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:29,013 Oh, yeah. I won't eat loads. 141 00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:30,639 Oh, you said you were starving earlier. 142 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:32,182 Yeah, I've got a tiny belly, though. 143 00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:33,642 We could each give a bit of our paellas. 144 00:06:33,643 --> 00:06:35,269 - Have half of mine. I'm not hungry. - Mum. I can share with you, 145 00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:36,687 - Mum, if you want me to. - No need. 146 00:06:36,688 --> 00:06:38,147 It gives me acid reflux, anyway. 147 00:06:38,148 --> 00:06:39,773 - I've got Gaviscon if you-- - I'll have the ceviche. 148 00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,150 - Thank you. - Ceviche. 149 00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:42,819 Gentle for your lady belly. 150 00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:47,908 Oh! Bit of chemistry there. 151 00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,035 No. 152 00:06:59,210 --> 00:07:00,502 See her? 153 00:07:00,503 --> 00:07:03,006 - How good does she look? - Oh, yeah. 154 00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:05,716 Oh, I'd love to look like that when I'm old. 155 00:07:05,717 --> 00:07:07,718 Sorta leathery, like in a punk way. 156 00:07:07,719 --> 00:07:09,846 - She's not old. She's our age. - Excuse me, she's not old. 157 00:07:10,472 --> 00:07:12,057 My age. She's my age. 158 00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:20,189 He likes you. 159 00:07:20,190 --> 00:07:22,316 I'd like to remind you. 160 00:07:22,317 --> 00:07:24,319 - You're beautiful in every single... - Just give me that. 161 00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:38,291 Mum? 162 00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:42,878 Sam asked me to come get you. They wanna play "Heads Up." 163 00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:43,837 What the hell's that? 164 00:07:43,838 --> 00:07:45,465 Apparently, it's like the game "Mr. & Mrs."? 165 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,093 It's fine, I'll be in a couple with you. 166 00:07:50,011 --> 00:07:52,054 - Why are you looking at flights? - Because I've come on 167 00:07:52,055 --> 00:07:54,098 a couples' holiday by mistake. 168 00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:55,724 And I just thought I could go. 169 00:07:55,725 --> 00:07:57,476 - But you should stay, okay? - No, Mum. 170 00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:59,311 - You can't leave me here. - No, 'cause you can go clubbing. 171 00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:00,229 - No! - Look, 172 00:08:00,230 --> 00:08:01,355 I don't wanna be one of those mothers 173 00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:03,274 who uses their son as a plus-one. 174 00:08:04,192 --> 00:08:06,610 Partnering up on games and sharing paellas. 175 00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:08,613 That is future-issues territory. 176 00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:13,159 Mum. 177 00:08:14,869 --> 00:08:16,788 You're a mentalist, 'kay? 178 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:22,793 Just do what single women your age do on holiday. 179 00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:25,546 Like, I don't know, Mum. 180 00:08:25,547 --> 00:08:27,631 Go to Wayne Lineker's bar, 181 00:08:27,632 --> 00:08:30,426 watch dolphins, get your nails done. 182 00:08:30,427 --> 00:08:32,595 Just try to have a good time. 183 00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:42,563 Yeah, it's green and massive. 184 00:08:42,564 --> 00:08:43,689 - The Grinch. - No. 185 00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:45,607 - The jolly giant sweet corn guy. - No, no. 186 00:08:45,608 --> 00:08:47,401 - Think green and massive! - Shrek's dick? 187 00:08:47,402 --> 00:08:49,319 - Just Shrek will suffice. Next. - Okay. 188 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:51,238 - It's a type of poem. - Spoken word? 189 00:08:51,239 --> 00:08:52,823 - No, but it rhymes. - Rap? 190 00:08:52,824 --> 00:08:54,616 - Yeah, but Irish. - Kneecap? 191 00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:56,201 Been doing my homework. Tiocfaidh ár lá. 192 00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:57,411 Should we just pass on this one? 193 00:08:57,412 --> 00:08:58,620 Something you do first thing in the morning. 194 00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:00,372 - Gut microbiome shot. - No. 195 00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:01,707 Something one would do. 196 00:09:01,708 --> 00:09:03,542 Lint roll outfit for the day? 197 00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:05,711 No, think "first thing in the morning." 198 00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,087 There's no wrong answers, Theresa. 199 00:09:07,088 --> 00:09:08,338 Ah, a big poo? 200 00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:10,299 No! God, Theresa, Jesus. 201 00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:11,967 - Something you lose. - Keys. 202 00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:13,510 Yes! Okay. 203 00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:15,429 Something you cook rice in, I never would. 204 00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:17,556 - Microwave. - Yeah, yeah! 205 00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:20,184 Okay, so, your man who took you to school every day. 206 00:09:20,185 --> 00:09:21,769 - Bus driver. - Yes! 207 00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:23,479 - I buy too many of these. - Candles. 208 00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,022 Yes! Oh, okay. 209 00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:26,565 A person we think could be a pedo? 210 00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:28,234 - Postman. - Yes! 211 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:30,861 Oh, my gosh! 212 00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:32,489 - We nailed it! - That was so good. 213 00:09:34,657 --> 00:09:37,034 Hey, Ruari, should we do a round together? 214 00:09:37,035 --> 00:09:39,329 Ah, no. We'd be useless. It's fine. 215 00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:42,665 Who's next? 216 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,048 Steep. 217 00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:53,968 Hi. 218 00:10:31,339 --> 00:10:32,674 Oh, shit, I pissed myself. 219 00:10:39,222 --> 00:10:40,430 Engage thrusters. 220 00:10:40,431 --> 00:10:42,266 Hey! I'm back! 221 00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:43,809 - Hey! - Hi! 222 00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:45,602 I got us tomatoes. And a new outfit. 223 00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:49,106 - Yay! - Bloody Marys tomorrow. Hey, great! 224 00:10:49,107 --> 00:10:51,567 Here you go. A grapefruit fusion. 225 00:10:51,568 --> 00:10:52,818 - Ooh. - Yeah. 226 00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:54,111 - Engage thrusters! - Hey, Al, 227 00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:55,654 is it okay if Ruari joins us 228 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,197 - on a lads' night out? - Yeah! 229 00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:59,700 Well, I mean, he's 18, so I don't-- 230 00:10:59,701 --> 00:11:02,870 But you know, if he doesn't want to, he doesn't have to. 231 00:11:02,871 --> 00:11:05,247 Yeah, he does. Come on, I insist. 232 00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:07,249 - Frankie! Beautiful. - I'll make sure we have fun. 233 00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:08,250 No, thanks. 234 00:11:08,251 --> 00:11:10,669 Yeah, you stay in with us girls, Ruari. 235 00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:12,171 Should we get dressed up? 236 00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:14,464 Mmm, I'm feeling a bit tipsy-woo. 237 00:11:14,465 --> 00:11:15,632 So, who knows where we-- 238 00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:17,385 Yeah, actually, I'm gonna come to town. 239 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:21,305 - Alright, Frankie boy. - My Lorc. 240 00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:23,599 Right, ladies, we're off! 241 00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:26,476 - Enjoy your tomatoes. - Yeah, come on. 242 00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:28,520 - Have fun! - Alright, Ruari! 243 00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:29,980 - We are going to have some fun. - Have a good time. 244 00:11:29,981 --> 00:11:31,440 God, you make smoking look good. 245 00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:32,608 You mind? 246 00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:33,693 - Be good. - Sure. 247 00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:36,361 Will you do me a favor? Will you keep an eye 248 00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:37,779 - on Ruari later? - What are you doing? 249 00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:40,365 I don't want an 18-year-old paralytic in Ibiza, 250 00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:42,451 and I trust you more than I trust his father. 251 00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:43,619 - Stop. - Come on! 252 00:11:43,620 --> 00:11:45,288 - I'm flattered. I think. - Ah! Dad! 253 00:11:45,997 --> 00:11:47,206 You have ash in your hair. 254 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:49,791 - Oh. - Text me. Make sure you text me. 255 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:51,043 - Frank? - Come on. 256 00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:53,212 Be safe! Don't get pickpocketed 257 00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:55,631 by some deviant old lady trying to sell you a red rose. 258 00:11:55,632 --> 00:11:58,800 - Bye! - No sane girl wants a single red rose. 259 00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:00,677 It's just something else you have to carry. 260 00:12:00,678 --> 00:12:02,179 - Come on. - Yeah, I'm coming. 261 00:12:02,180 --> 00:12:04,182 I love a single red rose. 262 00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:20,822 Here, shall we get a shot at the bar, you and me? 263 00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:22,074 You know, dad and son? 264 00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:24,202 Well, we can all just have a shot. 265 00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:28,456 Yeah. Yeah, we could do that. 266 00:12:37,382 --> 00:12:40,884 You're very quiet. Are you upset with me or Frank? 267 00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:42,469 What? No. 268 00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:45,556 I'm in a Balearic paradise. What's to be upset about? 269 00:12:46,307 --> 00:12:49,601 So, what's it like to be a subordinate 270 00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:52,271 - on holiday with your boss? - Oh! 271 00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:54,564 Well, I don't really think about it like that. 272 00:12:54,565 --> 00:12:56,566 I mean, we were friends first, and 273 00:12:56,567 --> 00:12:58,402 anyway, she's more my partner than my boss. 274 00:12:58,403 --> 00:12:59,861 - Aren't you? - Don't push it. 275 00:12:59,862 --> 00:13:01,447 Aw, you two. 276 00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:03,240 Oh. 277 00:13:03,241 --> 00:13:06,702 Friends! And you, new friend. 278 00:13:06,703 --> 00:13:09,162 Thank you for your dress. 279 00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:12,625 It feels so good to wear against my skin. 280 00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:25,304 Whoa! What a physique! 281 00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:28,390 That is where I need to be at for my show. 282 00:13:28,391 --> 00:13:29,808 - Ha! - What? 283 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:31,601 You might need a bit of AI with that, Lorcs, mate. 284 00:13:31,602 --> 00:13:33,520 Yeah? Yeah, you think so? 285 00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:35,315 You haven't met my personal trainer. 286 00:13:36,441 --> 00:13:38,191 Hey! How you doing? 287 00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:40,320 You're looking at me like you know me. 288 00:13:41,404 --> 00:13:43,613 Yeah, let me put you out of your misery. 289 00:13:43,614 --> 00:13:45,574 - I'm an actor. - Jesus, Dad. 290 00:13:45,575 --> 00:13:47,617 He doesn't care that you're an actor. 291 00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:49,745 They're staring at you 'cause you look like a fucking whitehead zit. 292 00:13:49,746 --> 00:13:51,788 What is your problem tonight, huh? 293 00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:55,375 Hey, Ruari, let's go to the bar, eh? Get us a round of novelty cocktails. 294 00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:57,712 This feels like a slippery nipple sort of place. 295 00:14:03,634 --> 00:14:06,429 He never asks what's going on with me anymore. 296 00:14:07,430 --> 00:14:10,599 It's like he's worried that I'm gonna tell him something difficult 297 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:12,392 and he's gonna have to deal with it. 298 00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:15,479 He could be a dick when he still lived with us, 299 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:18,191 but, like, I always thought that was just 'cause he hated Mum. 300 00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:20,692 But he's still a dick. 301 00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:23,111 And it stresses me out because he's my dad. 302 00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:25,614 It's like, what if I end up like him? 303 00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:27,074 Ah, don't be too hard on him. 304 00:14:27,075 --> 00:14:29,659 And remember, you're the product of both your parents. 305 00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:32,120 His dickishness will probably get canceled out 306 00:14:32,121 --> 00:14:34,289 by the fact your mother is so ace. 307 00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:35,458 You know. 308 00:14:38,086 --> 00:14:40,337 - What? No. No. - Why? 309 00:14:40,338 --> 00:14:43,841 Yeah, I'm just, like, I'm a bit paranoid around girls at the moment. 310 00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:47,969 Look, mate, you're in Spain. Nobody knows you here. 311 00:14:47,970 --> 00:14:50,055 You can fall flat on your face. It won't matter. 312 00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:52,182 I have to go to the bar. You crack on. 313 00:14:52,183 --> 00:14:53,643 No. Patrick. 314 00:14:54,435 --> 00:14:55,269 What? 315 00:14:57,855 --> 00:14:58,773 What? 316 00:15:01,442 --> 00:15:03,151 I don't speak Spanish. 317 00:15:03,152 --> 00:15:06,071 But I do know the word for "nut pastry" in German. 318 00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:07,573 "Nussgebäcks." 319 00:15:14,664 --> 00:15:15,498 Oh, right. 320 00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:18,167 Oh, we're-- okay, cool. 321 00:15:19,836 --> 00:15:22,462 I know that I am a hundred times better than you, babe. 322 00:15:22,463 --> 00:15:24,631 Yeah, Millie thinks I'm threatened by her. 323 00:15:24,632 --> 00:15:26,174 What am I threatened about her? Your small tits 324 00:15:26,175 --> 00:15:27,926 - and your small waist... - Mm, so any thoughts 325 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:29,678 on what you'd like to do in Toronto? 326 00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:30,804 What am I gonna do? 327 00:15:30,805 --> 00:15:31,973 Yeah. 328 00:15:32,890 --> 00:15:34,516 I actually don't know. 329 00:15:34,517 --> 00:15:36,017 Well, you'll figure it out. 330 00:15:36,018 --> 00:15:38,186 What do you-- let me just... 331 00:15:38,187 --> 00:15:39,813 What do you like? 332 00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:41,773 What do you mean, what do I like? 333 00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:43,817 Well, just, you know, what do you do for fun? 334 00:15:43,818 --> 00:15:45,235 I don't know. Do you know, 335 00:15:45,236 --> 00:15:48,697 Lorcan hasn't actually asked me what I'll do. 336 00:15:48,698 --> 00:15:50,824 It's like he forgets I'm coming. 337 00:15:50,825 --> 00:15:52,784 That's all men. Patrick's the same. 338 00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:54,411 - Really? - This trip, 339 00:15:54,412 --> 00:15:56,121 he was casually like, "I'm going to Ibiza," 340 00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:57,998 and I was like, "You know I love Ibiza." 341 00:15:57,999 --> 00:15:59,875 And he was just like, "Cool." 342 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:02,586 And I was like, "So, am I coming?" 343 00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:04,004 And then he was just like, "Uh..." 344 00:16:04,005 --> 00:16:06,131 And I was like, "Well, duh, obviously I'm coming!" 345 00:16:06,132 --> 00:16:08,675 - So, he didn't invite you? - No. 346 00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:10,802 Sometimes I actually feel like I have to shove my tits 347 00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:12,971 in his face just to get attention, you know? 348 00:16:12,972 --> 00:16:17,058 I hope no one's shoving their tits anywhere near my husband's face. 349 00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:20,229 Jesus. Okay, what the hell is wrong with you tonight? 350 00:16:21,606 --> 00:16:24,399 I didn't wanna blow Frank this morning. 351 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:26,193 And I haven't all week. I'm worried, 352 00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:28,361 if I'm not blowing him, who is? 353 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:30,155 I don't think you need to worry about that, I-- 354 00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:31,573 Well, Frank is sexy, isn't he? 355 00:16:31,574 --> 00:16:33,617 I think most women would wanna blow the guy. 356 00:16:33,618 --> 00:16:35,911 And when I'm in the mood, I love giving him head. 357 00:16:35,912 --> 00:16:39,915 I really do, but I've lost the urge. I couldn't rouse myself. 358 00:16:39,916 --> 00:16:41,708 Well, I don't know, maybe it's-- 359 00:16:41,709 --> 00:16:44,377 I mean, I had that. Could be a perimenopause thing. 360 00:16:44,378 --> 00:16:47,589 Fuck you, no! I'm barely in my early late 40s. 361 00:16:47,590 --> 00:16:49,466 Look, I think just have a head holiday. 362 00:16:49,467 --> 00:16:50,926 He's not replying to any of my messages. 363 00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:53,845 - Look. - Oh, my God, Sam. 364 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:55,305 Bake Off! 365 00:16:55,306 --> 00:16:58,392 I'm gonna apply to Canada's Great British Bake Off. 366 00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:01,478 I think I'm gonna go in for a dance, you know. 367 00:17:01,479 --> 00:17:03,313 - Back in soon. Just DM me. - Yes, you go and be free. 368 00:17:03,314 --> 00:17:05,774 - Okay. - And don't you let anyone forget you. 369 00:17:05,775 --> 00:17:07,776 Oh. Okay, no thank you. 370 00:17:07,777 --> 00:17:09,861 Whoa. Oh! 371 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:13,032 Whoo! Yeah! Yeah! 372 00:17:18,246 --> 00:17:20,080 Lads, selfie! 373 00:17:20,081 --> 00:17:21,998 Whoo! 374 00:17:21,999 --> 00:17:23,167 No, take another. 375 00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:25,211 Wait, no. 376 00:17:26,212 --> 00:17:28,631 Lads. Sam's in a mard! 377 00:17:29,632 --> 00:17:31,049 - Home time for me! - Huh? 378 00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,468 Home time! I've gotta go home! 379 00:17:33,469 --> 00:17:36,097 No, I was just about to get us into the VIP section. 380 00:17:36,931 --> 00:17:40,016 Do you know what? If you've seen one set of genitalia on an overhead swing, 381 00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:41,935 you've seen 'em all. Let's get back. 382 00:17:41,936 --> 00:17:43,854 - Sorry, mate. - Ah, man. 383 00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:48,108 - Ruari. Hey! How you doing? - Hey! 384 00:17:48,109 --> 00:17:49,734 How are you? It's so good to see you. 385 00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,278 You're gonna have to leave now, buddy. 386 00:17:51,279 --> 00:17:52,821 - Come on, we've got a taxi to catch. - What? Did you see 387 00:17:52,822 --> 00:17:54,114 - that big smoke? - Yeah, it was amazing. 388 00:17:54,115 --> 00:17:55,407 Frank cockblocked you. 389 00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:56,492 - What? - Come on! 390 00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:04,541 - They're back. - Oh, come on. 391 00:18:04,542 --> 00:18:05,917 - Hello, hello. - Hey, hi. 392 00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:08,044 - Hey, hey, hey. - So, where's Cara? 393 00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:10,297 - Did she go to bed or-- - Oh, she fucked off, 394 00:18:10,298 --> 00:18:12,966 ain't she, to the klerrrb, yo. 395 00:18:12,967 --> 00:18:16,136 She's too sexy for this party. 396 00:18:16,137 --> 00:18:17,846 - Okay, hey, hey, hey, hey. - Too sexy 397 00:18:17,847 --> 00:18:19,306 - for this party. Ooh. - Okay, I'm gonna go get a beer. 398 00:18:19,307 --> 00:18:20,849 Hey, hey, hey. Oh, you put ten pence 399 00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:22,726 in Theresa, then, eh? 400 00:18:22,727 --> 00:18:25,770 Good night, was it? So good, you couldn't text me back? 401 00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:27,564 I don't negotiate with terrorists, Sam. 402 00:18:27,565 --> 00:18:29,734 Those texts that you sent were an act of terror. 403 00:18:30,693 --> 00:18:32,360 Stop being a paranoid dose. 404 00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:34,155 - Give me a kiss. - Ruari. 405 00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:37,658 - Ruari! - I'm gonna get some shots! 406 00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:39,994 Did you have a good night? 407 00:18:40,995 --> 00:18:42,747 - Actually, yeah. - Yeah? 408 00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,498 Let's learn Spanish, Mum. 409 00:18:45,499 --> 00:18:49,169 Well, yeah, okay. I'd love that. 410 00:18:49,170 --> 00:18:50,086 Why? 411 00:18:50,087 --> 00:18:52,380 - Ruari met a Spanish girl. - Oh, okay. 412 00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:54,507 She looked at me with her eyes. 413 00:18:54,508 --> 00:18:57,927 Her eyes? Wow. She had eyes. 414 00:18:57,928 --> 00:18:59,346 And then what happened? 415 00:18:59,347 --> 00:19:01,014 I looked at her back, 416 00:19:01,015 --> 00:19:03,976 and then told her the German word for nut pastries. 417 00:19:05,853 --> 00:19:07,145 - Okay. - And, you know, Mum, 418 00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:09,356 - I actually do love you. - Oh, I love you-- 419 00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:11,399 I love you, too. 420 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:14,319 And I actually loved my own company today, by the way. 421 00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:15,570 Thanks for the pep talk. 422 00:19:15,571 --> 00:19:17,740 Oh, Wayne Lineker's club has closed down. 423 00:19:20,534 --> 00:19:21,993 Everyone, a round of Craig Davids. 424 00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:23,536 I'll have four! 425 00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:27,540 Oh, why don't you have a nice cup of tea? 426 00:19:27,541 --> 00:19:29,209 What's actually in Craig Davids? 427 00:19:29,210 --> 00:19:31,628 - Tequila and pineapple juice. - Oh. 428 00:19:31,629 --> 00:19:34,840 I'd never had one until Frank's bar, when his friend Georgia made them. 429 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:37,342 Georgia? 430 00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:38,469 At the bar?! 431 00:19:39,553 --> 00:19:41,054 Where the two of you drank shots?! 432 00:19:41,055 --> 00:19:42,598 Oh, I work in a bar! 433 00:19:43,265 --> 00:19:45,475 It's a gift economy. 434 00:19:45,476 --> 00:19:49,145 - Everybody gets a free shot! - I didn't know, Mum. 435 00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:51,606 - No, of course you didn't. - It's not your fault, pal. 436 00:19:51,607 --> 00:19:53,275 ...very polite-- 437 00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:55,652 I'm gonna go to bed. 438 00:19:55,653 --> 00:19:57,530 Alright, honey. Night. 439 00:19:59,907 --> 00:20:01,574 - I'm gonna be sick. - Oh, Jesus. 440 00:20:01,575 --> 00:20:03,034 - Where should I be sick? - Jesus. 441 00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:05,328 In the toilet. In the toilet. 442 00:20:05,329 --> 00:20:06,830 I've seen you in worse states. 443 00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:08,248 - Don't be a bitch. - What? 444 00:20:08,249 --> 00:20:09,708 I wasn't saying anything. 445 00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:12,502 And I don't know what you've been saying to Ruari about me, 446 00:20:12,503 --> 00:20:14,003 but it's affecting our relationship. 447 00:20:14,004 --> 00:20:17,465 And you know, if you hadn't mollycoddled him so much, 448 00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:19,759 he wouldn't be so fucking sensitive. 449 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:21,178 - Now, hang on a second. - It's not fun. 450 00:20:24,098 --> 00:20:25,433 I need to meditate. 451 00:20:30,396 --> 00:20:31,564 Light up. 452 00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:33,983 When in Spain. 453 00:20:36,610 --> 00:20:38,612 - Can I ask you something? - Always. 454 00:20:39,572 --> 00:20:41,991 Who the fuck gave my son MDMA? 455 00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:44,576 I've been meaning to talk to you about that. 456 00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:47,162 I think it was the bloody Spanish girl. 457 00:20:47,163 --> 00:20:52,167 I don't know how she slipped it past me, but I kept my eye on him, got him home. 458 00:20:52,168 --> 00:20:53,502 I'm sorry. 459 00:20:55,212 --> 00:20:56,630 Okay, thanks. 460 00:21:01,135 --> 00:21:03,762 Hopefully, the horror he's gonna feel tomorrow 461 00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:05,181 will be enough to put him off for life. 462 00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:08,309 Yeah, I know that's how it works for me. 463 00:21:17,067 --> 00:21:19,111 You fancy staying awake to watch the sun come up? 464 00:21:22,573 --> 00:21:24,283 Lorcan put me off sunrises. 465 00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:27,911 He went to Burning Man one year 466 00:21:27,912 --> 00:21:31,080 and he saw his first "on drugs" sunrise. 467 00:21:31,081 --> 00:21:34,000 And when he came back, he wouldn't shut up about it. 468 00:21:34,001 --> 00:21:36,295 Kept trying to force me to watch one. 469 00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:39,131 I think it ended our marriage. 470 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:41,550 Not the friendship bracelets? 471 00:21:49,975 --> 00:21:52,394 Oh, my God. We're terrible. 472 00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:04,281 Patrick. 473 00:22:05,783 --> 00:22:06,991 Patrick. 474 00:22:06,992 --> 00:22:09,245 Patrick! Wakey-wakey! 475 00:22:10,454 --> 00:22:11,704 Where were you? 476 00:22:11,705 --> 00:22:13,706 I was messaging you to come meet me. 477 00:22:13,707 --> 00:22:16,168 - It was such a laugh. - I bet it was. Shh. 478 00:22:17,545 --> 00:22:19,421 It's bedtime. You coming in? 479 00:22:20,506 --> 00:22:21,757 Yeah, yeah, of course. 480 00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:26,678 Ow. 481 00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:30,223 Yeah, yeah, I'm so tired. 482 00:22:30,224 --> 00:22:31,642 I know. 483 00:22:33,561 --> 00:22:34,979 Yeah. How much are these? 484 00:22:35,938 --> 00:22:37,272 I don't speak Spanish. 485 00:22:37,273 --> 00:22:39,567 - Just a little German. - Okay. 486 00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:52,746 Sorry. 487 00:22:53,414 --> 00:22:56,374 I just wanted to tell you, you look great. 488 00:22:56,375 --> 00:23:00,044 Just so cool and content, and just comfortable in your skin, 489 00:23:00,045 --> 00:23:02,463 - just you by yourself and-- - So sorry, sorry. 490 00:23:02,464 --> 00:23:04,340 Me English, bad, bad. 491 00:23:04,341 --> 00:23:05,466 It's very bad. 492 00:23:05,467 --> 00:23:06,635 - No-- - It's okay. 493 00:23:07,344 --> 00:23:09,470 You inspired me. Just... 494 00:23:09,471 --> 00:23:10,681 But you look great, you know? 495 00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:12,182 You're hot. 496 00:23:13,392 --> 00:23:14,392 You're hot. 497 00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:17,229 You look hot. You know, like, hot. 498 00:23:19,315 --> 00:23:21,399 Huh? No, no, no. 499 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:22,443 No, sorry. 500 00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:24,862 I was just telling her that she... 501 00:23:25,696 --> 00:23:28,114 It's fine. It was a compliment. 502 00:23:28,115 --> 00:23:32,118 It was, honestly, it's a misunderstanding. 503 00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:33,661 I was just saying you look great. 504 00:23:33,662 --> 00:23:35,331 Just go about your business, it's fine. 505 00:23:44,298 --> 00:23:46,342 Right, can I have your attention, please? 506 00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:48,676 Ten years ago, I married this woman, 507 00:23:48,677 --> 00:23:50,554 who rocked everything I thought I wanted in life. 508 00:23:51,722 --> 00:23:55,309 Someone who was confident, independent, had a great rack. 509 00:23:56,435 --> 00:23:58,645 She gave zero fucks about anything. 510 00:23:58,646 --> 00:24:00,688 She made my life feel full. 511 00:24:00,689 --> 00:24:02,774 So, I'd like you to help me by raising a toast 512 00:24:02,775 --> 00:24:06,820 to the woman who made me the twat that I am today. 513 00:24:08,030 --> 00:24:08,947 Samantha! 514 00:24:08,948 --> 00:24:10,490 To Sam! 515 00:24:10,491 --> 00:24:12,909 - Samantha. - Now, let's try and make this 516 00:24:12,910 --> 00:24:16,622 a relaxing final day boat rave! 517 00:24:18,540 --> 00:24:20,333 Come on, Sam, we can start, right? 518 00:24:20,334 --> 00:24:22,878 Yay! 519 00:24:27,049 --> 00:24:28,884 - Oi. - Whoo! 520 00:24:30,469 --> 00:24:32,303 - You alright? - I feel like shit. 521 00:24:32,304 --> 00:24:34,973 Yeah, well, what do you expect? You did MDMA last night. 522 00:24:34,974 --> 00:24:36,391 It's par for the course. 523 00:24:36,392 --> 00:24:38,017 What, you knew? 524 00:24:38,018 --> 00:24:40,687 Of course, I knew. And for the next 48 hours, 525 00:24:40,688 --> 00:24:43,773 you are gonna look and feel like a bag of shit. 526 00:24:43,774 --> 00:24:45,566 And in the middle of it all, you're gonna sit 527 00:24:45,567 --> 00:24:47,485 on a Ryanair flight next to your mother 528 00:24:47,486 --> 00:24:49,570 in an existential fog, and it will be the punishment 529 00:24:49,571 --> 00:24:51,573 you deserve for doing drugs. 530 00:24:52,574 --> 00:24:53,867 And booking Ryanair. 531 00:24:55,494 --> 00:24:58,247 How do you know all that? Have you done it? 532 00:25:00,249 --> 00:25:02,167 What? No, don't be stupid. 533 00:25:06,714 --> 00:25:08,257 Whoo! 534 00:25:12,177 --> 00:25:13,971 God, look at this! 535 00:25:16,432 --> 00:25:18,433 - Oh, Frank. - Hey, watch. 536 00:25:18,434 --> 00:25:19,435 What is he doing? 537 00:25:21,270 --> 00:25:22,562 Don't encourage him! 538 00:25:22,563 --> 00:25:24,105 - Nice one, big man! - Whoo! 539 00:25:24,106 --> 00:25:25,940 Great going, Frankie! 540 00:25:25,941 --> 00:25:27,900 Lads! In you come! 541 00:25:27,901 --> 00:25:30,445 It's lovely! Patrick, go! Whoo! 542 00:25:30,446 --> 00:25:32,989 - How's it feel? - Ow! You fucker! 543 00:25:32,990 --> 00:25:34,741 Jellyfish just fucking-- ow! 544 00:25:34,742 --> 00:25:37,744 Is there a sea monster as well? 545 00:25:37,745 --> 00:25:39,454 Patrick will pee on it for ya! 546 00:25:39,455 --> 00:25:40,872 God! Oh! 547 00:25:40,873 --> 00:25:43,499 Frank! Frankie! 548 00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:45,960 - You okay, Frank? - Oh, fuck. Is he having a heart attack? 549 00:25:45,961 --> 00:25:46,962 - Frankie! - Frank! 550 00:25:48,297 --> 00:25:50,173 - Help me! - Oh, my God, Patrick! 551 00:25:50,174 --> 00:25:52,675 Oh, my God! Could we get a lifeline? 552 00:25:52,676 --> 00:25:55,470 Shit. Did anyone bring the life buoy? 553 00:25:55,471 --> 00:25:56,430 Frank! 554 00:25:57,097 --> 00:25:59,307 - Alright, mate, I've got you. - Okay, is my hair in? 555 00:25:59,308 --> 00:26:00,559 Is my hair in? 556 00:26:02,436 --> 00:26:04,104 Frank! Please! 557 00:26:33,634 --> 00:26:34,760 You alright, Ruari? 558 00:26:35,761 --> 00:26:38,555 Here, find a vending machine, get a full-fat Coke. 559 00:26:39,515 --> 00:26:41,141 And watch some Rick and Morty. 560 00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:47,230 - That was fucking terrifying. - I know. 561 00:26:47,231 --> 00:26:48,981 I thought he might be a goner. 562 00:26:48,982 --> 00:26:51,527 I really need to finish my level two in first aid. 563 00:26:53,987 --> 00:26:55,530 You okay? 564 00:26:55,531 --> 00:26:56,989 Yeah... 565 00:26:56,990 --> 00:26:58,991 No. 566 00:26:58,992 --> 00:27:00,744 I kept thinking... 567 00:27:02,788 --> 00:27:04,373 life's fucking short. 568 00:27:06,333 --> 00:27:11,505 And I'm worried that I didn't try hard enough. 569 00:27:13,757 --> 00:27:14,924 - For us. - Yeah. 570 00:27:14,925 --> 00:27:16,843 Just maybe we don't get into all that. 571 00:27:16,844 --> 00:27:19,179 I just don't wanna have any regrets. 572 00:27:20,639 --> 00:27:21,723 I miss you. 573 00:27:25,519 --> 00:27:27,103 Well, you've said that before. 574 00:27:27,104 --> 00:27:28,605 Yeah, but this time it hurts. 575 00:27:32,651 --> 00:27:34,444 - Did you-- - I didn't do any drugs last night. 576 00:27:40,659 --> 00:27:42,035 Do you want a water? 577 00:27:43,203 --> 00:27:44,079 Yeah. 578 00:27:45,831 --> 00:27:47,166 ¿Sin gas or con gas? 579 00:27:50,043 --> 00:27:51,503 You choose.