1 00:00:16,917 --> 00:00:19,083 Well, we all know why we're here. 2 00:00:19,167 --> 00:00:20,167 Do we? 3 00:00:20,250 --> 00:00:21,250 Don't we? 4 00:00:21,333 --> 00:00:22,625 - I don't. - Do you? 5 00:00:22,708 --> 00:00:23,875 Well, I'm here to... 6 00:00:23,958 --> 00:00:26,417 No - why he's here... 7 00:00:26,583 --> 00:00:27,583 Okay, gentlemen. 8 00:00:28,083 --> 00:00:29,292 Some clarification. 9 00:00:29,583 --> 00:00:32,333 We're all here to discuss your late grandmother, 10 00:00:32,458 --> 00:00:35,042 Dorothy Pamela Elizabeth Woodley's 11 00:00:35,375 --> 00:00:36,375 estate. 12 00:00:36,458 --> 00:00:39,167 Right, okay, so, again... 13 00:00:39,667 --> 00:00:40,667 Why is he here? 14 00:00:41,167 --> 00:00:44,208 Well, a month ago, Mrs Woodley 15 00:00:44,292 --> 00:00:46,042 updated her final wishes. 16 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:49,000 Does my dad know about this? 17 00:00:49,083 --> 00:00:50,583 Yes, your father's been informed, 18 00:00:50,667 --> 00:00:52,333 but as you know, he doesn't live in the country. 19 00:00:52,417 --> 00:00:55,083 - Yes, I'm actually well aware. - And hasn't for ten years. 20 00:00:55,208 --> 00:00:56,292 Oh, we're keeping a tally. 21 00:00:56,417 --> 00:01:00,833 So, I am the sole executor of your grandmother's will. 22 00:01:01,208 --> 00:01:03,333 Right, I understand all that, but... 23 00:01:04,208 --> 00:01:05,208 updating it... 24 00:01:05,417 --> 00:01:06,417 now... 25 00:01:06,542 --> 00:01:07,542 all of a sudden... 26 00:01:08,375 --> 00:01:10,292 Bit suspish, no? 27 00:01:10,375 --> 00:01:11,375 I mean... 28 00:01:11,458 --> 00:01:13,125 she was obviously losing her marbles. 29 00:01:13,208 --> 00:01:16,083 I can assure you that Mrs Woodley's marbles 30 00:01:16,167 --> 00:01:17,667 were very much intact. 31 00:01:17,750 --> 00:01:19,000 Excuse me, Mr Dickie. 32 00:01:19,083 --> 00:01:20,083 Just Dickie. 33 00:01:20,542 --> 00:01:21,792 Sorry, Dickie... 34 00:01:22,542 --> 00:01:23,542 I'm just... 35 00:01:25,458 --> 00:01:26,458 Was just a friend. 36 00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:29,208 I don't... I'm not here to... 37 00:01:29,292 --> 00:01:30,875 Oh, come on, do you really expect us to believe 38 00:01:30,958 --> 00:01:32,125 that you're... - Gentlemen! 39 00:01:32,208 --> 00:01:33,208 Please... 40 00:01:33,458 --> 00:01:36,000 Out of respect for your grandmother, 41 00:01:36,083 --> 00:01:37,583 I suggest that you listen... 42 00:01:38,792 --> 00:01:39,833 very carefully. 43 00:01:42,833 --> 00:01:45,583 "I devise and bequeath my property, 44 00:01:45,917 --> 00:01:49,167 both real and personal and wherever situated 45 00:01:49,458 --> 00:01:50,625 as follows..." 46 00:01:57,583 --> 00:02:00,167 - Say it, Tom. - I'm also in love with Philip. 47 00:02:00,250 --> 00:02:01,958 - Philip? - Yes, Philip. 48 00:02:02,042 --> 00:02:03,042 Who's Philip? 49 00:02:03,375 --> 00:02:04,500 Philip, the milkman. 50 00:02:05,708 --> 00:02:07,333 I'm so sorry, Jessica. 51 00:02:32,208 --> 00:02:34,583 Oh, for fuck's sake. 52 00:02:35,958 --> 00:02:37,125 I'm coming! 53 00:02:37,208 --> 00:02:38,333 I'm coming! 54 00:02:39,792 --> 00:02:41,000 - Yes? - Sorry to bother you, 55 00:02:41,083 --> 00:02:43,083 my football went into your garden, I think. 56 00:02:43,292 --> 00:02:44,292 You think? 57 00:02:44,833 --> 00:02:45,833 Or it did? 58 00:02:46,333 --> 00:02:47,958 I think it did. 59 00:02:48,167 --> 00:02:49,750 It either did, or it didn't. 60 00:02:49,833 --> 00:02:53,208 It sort of went in on an angle, so it could've gone next door. 61 00:02:54,333 --> 00:02:55,333 I see. 62 00:02:55,833 --> 00:02:58,417 And who's to blame for this lousy shot? 63 00:02:59,583 --> 00:03:00,583 That would be me. 64 00:03:04,083 --> 00:03:06,125 Could you open a tin of prunes 65 00:03:06,208 --> 00:03:08,208 better than you can kick a ball? 66 00:03:10,333 --> 00:03:11,708 Well, you'd better come in. 67 00:03:12,542 --> 00:03:14,625 You'll have to ignore the mess, I'm afraid. 68 00:03:14,708 --> 00:03:18,125 Cleaning is not how one intends to spend one's final days. 69 00:03:18,208 --> 00:03:20,542 Oh, I'm so sorry. 70 00:03:20,917 --> 00:03:21,917 For what? 71 00:03:22,083 --> 00:03:23,083 That you're... 72 00:03:23,667 --> 00:03:25,292 Oh, I'm not dying. 73 00:03:25,458 --> 00:03:26,958 Well, not just yet. 74 00:03:27,292 --> 00:03:30,917 Though, at 87, I suspect it won't be too long. 75 00:03:31,833 --> 00:03:33,583 I suppose at your age, 76 00:03:34,167 --> 00:03:35,917 you don't really think about it. 77 00:03:36,292 --> 00:03:39,917 Well, I don't particularly think about death much. 78 00:03:40,333 --> 00:03:43,083 It's the getting there that's tedious. 79 00:03:43,333 --> 00:03:44,333 Go through. 80 00:03:44,458 --> 00:03:48,375 And the thought of having some stranger have to wipe your... 81 00:03:50,833 --> 00:03:53,458 Good grief, is it that time already? 82 00:03:59,917 --> 00:04:02,417 I must have these every day, 83 00:04:02,833 --> 00:04:06,833 otherwise, my bowels go into a complete standstill. 84 00:04:12,708 --> 00:04:14,417 Oh, my! 85 00:04:15,208 --> 00:04:16,458 You're a dream. 86 00:04:16,583 --> 00:04:17,708 I mean, really. 87 00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:20,583 Muscles of steel, look at you. 88 00:04:21,833 --> 00:04:23,042 Thank you, uh... 89 00:04:23,708 --> 00:04:24,708 JJ. 90 00:04:25,583 --> 00:04:26,583 JJ... 91 00:04:27,542 --> 00:04:29,958 So handsome they named you twice. 92 00:04:31,958 --> 00:04:33,458 I must get that key... 93 00:04:34,292 --> 00:04:36,208 I rarely use it these days. 94 00:04:36,583 --> 00:04:40,208 Honestly, I don't remember the last time I went into my garden. 95 00:04:41,208 --> 00:04:42,708 Good job, really, 96 00:04:43,333 --> 00:04:47,042 if random balls keep coming through my back door. 97 00:05:02,333 --> 00:05:04,583 Goodness, it is overgrown here. 98 00:05:21,917 --> 00:05:24,458 You know, I haven't been out here for ages. 99 00:05:27,958 --> 00:05:29,792 The birds, do you hear them? 100 00:05:30,542 --> 00:05:31,583 So lovely. 101 00:05:33,208 --> 00:05:36,208 Good grief, is it March already? 102 00:05:39,458 --> 00:05:43,083 Must get some bird seed, they really do need feeding. 103 00:05:45,292 --> 00:05:47,042 It's mating season, you see. 104 00:05:47,208 --> 00:05:48,958 So they're all just bonking. 105 00:05:51,083 --> 00:05:52,083 The birds. 106 00:05:52,667 --> 00:05:53,958 That's all they do. 107 00:05:54,042 --> 00:05:55,042 Bonk. 108 00:05:55,583 --> 00:05:59,833 They've turned my loft into a knocking shop. 109 00:06:01,458 --> 00:06:02,458 I, I should go. 110 00:06:02,833 --> 00:06:04,833 But I've only just put the kettle on. 111 00:06:07,458 --> 00:06:08,458 Oh... 112 00:06:08,792 --> 00:06:09,792 Sorry. 113 00:06:21,042 --> 00:06:22,958 One should never apologise 114 00:06:23,667 --> 00:06:25,208 for an interest in literature. 115 00:06:27,333 --> 00:06:29,958 I've been collecting plays for... 116 00:06:30,417 --> 00:06:32,583 goodness, well over 50 years. 117 00:06:33,167 --> 00:06:37,458 My late husband and I always supported the arts, you see. 118 00:06:38,583 --> 00:06:41,042 Donating to various theatres. 119 00:06:41,917 --> 00:06:45,333 Helping young actors through RADA. 120 00:06:46,708 --> 00:06:47,708 RADA? 121 00:06:48,042 --> 00:06:49,208 The Royal Academy. 122 00:06:49,792 --> 00:06:50,833 Drama school. 123 00:06:51,583 --> 00:06:53,792 The very best there is, actually. 124 00:06:55,917 --> 00:06:57,083 I do drama at school. 125 00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:58,958 Oh, a budding actor. 126 00:06:59,208 --> 00:07:01,083 Oh, no, no, no, it's... 127 00:07:02,167 --> 00:07:03,833 just a, uh... - A what? 128 00:07:04,375 --> 00:07:05,375 A hobby. 129 00:07:05,458 --> 00:07:06,458 A hobby? 130 00:07:07,292 --> 00:07:11,417 Knitting's a hobby, or being a life model. 131 00:07:12,333 --> 00:07:14,500 Oh, although I don't know why anybody would want 132 00:07:14,583 --> 00:07:16,458 to have their fanny drawn. 133 00:07:17,417 --> 00:07:19,583 But... treading the boards... 134 00:07:21,458 --> 00:07:24,083 It's not something I think about as a... 135 00:07:24,708 --> 00:07:25,708 you know... 136 00:07:26,083 --> 00:07:27,083 career. 137 00:07:27,875 --> 00:07:29,958 My, my parents want me to be a footballer. 138 00:07:30,042 --> 00:07:31,042 A footballer? 139 00:07:31,125 --> 00:07:32,125 Like my brother. 140 00:07:32,208 --> 00:07:34,125 The fact that your ball 141 00:07:34,208 --> 00:07:37,208 is currently nestling in my wisteria 142 00:07:37,292 --> 00:07:38,583 doesn't bode well. 143 00:07:38,792 --> 00:07:40,792 I mean, really? 144 00:07:45,667 --> 00:07:47,458 Read something for me. 145 00:07:50,208 --> 00:07:51,375 - Really? - Please. 146 00:07:51,458 --> 00:07:52,542 Anything. 147 00:07:52,833 --> 00:07:54,833 That black book, in the middle. 148 00:07:57,083 --> 00:07:58,083 Fetch it. 149 00:08:05,042 --> 00:08:06,042 What's it about? 150 00:08:08,583 --> 00:08:10,833 It follows a group of young men, 151 00:08:11,583 --> 00:08:13,333 in New York, in the 80s, 152 00:08:14,333 --> 00:08:16,542 during that terrible pandemic. 153 00:08:17,417 --> 00:08:19,708 All 'friends of Dorothy'. 154 00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:22,083 Who's Dorothy? 155 00:08:22,167 --> 00:08:24,333 Dorothy, from The Wizard of Oz. 156 00:08:25,333 --> 00:08:27,458 Played by Judy Garland. 157 00:08:30,208 --> 00:08:32,333 You've heard of Judy Garland? 158 00:08:34,542 --> 00:08:35,708 Blimey O'Reilly. 159 00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:40,208 Oh, okay, well... 160 00:08:40,333 --> 00:08:44,083 In the film, Dorothy has a group of friends, male friends. 161 00:08:45,208 --> 00:08:46,208 They're all... 162 00:08:47,083 --> 00:08:48,083 a bit... 163 00:08:49,417 --> 00:08:50,458 different. 164 00:08:52,792 --> 00:08:53,792 Right... 165 00:08:55,042 --> 00:08:56,208 Try it from there. 166 00:09:04,292 --> 00:09:05,292 Well, go on. 167 00:09:08,833 --> 00:09:09,833 Finally... 168 00:09:12,333 --> 00:09:14,208 after years of fighting against it... 169 00:09:16,333 --> 00:09:17,833 after a lifetime of shame... 170 00:09:23,417 --> 00:09:24,792 to hold you in my arms... 171 00:09:28,583 --> 00:09:30,083 delighting in his body... 172 00:09:33,167 --> 00:09:34,167 in your smell... 173 00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:36,333 in my skin... 174 00:09:38,708 --> 00:09:39,833 in your warm breath... 175 00:09:40,833 --> 00:09:41,833 on my shoulder. 176 00:09:46,333 --> 00:09:47,333 I love you, 177 00:09:48,667 --> 00:09:49,667 Henry. 178 00:09:52,708 --> 00:09:57,417 And to know the peace that comes from finally telling the truth... 179 00:09:59,417 --> 00:10:00,417 about yourself... 180 00:10:06,083 --> 00:10:07,083 about your heart. 181 00:10:11,208 --> 00:10:12,417 Fucking hell. 182 00:10:16,833 --> 00:10:17,833 I've got to go. 183 00:10:21,292 --> 00:10:22,542 Wait a minute! 184 00:10:24,542 --> 00:10:25,542 Wait! 185 00:10:26,583 --> 00:10:28,792 Maybe there's a play you'd like to borrow? 186 00:10:32,583 --> 00:10:33,583 Good. 187 00:10:34,792 --> 00:10:35,917 It's in your bag. 188 00:10:37,583 --> 00:10:40,583 See you same time tomorrow for pruning? 189 00:10:44,833 --> 00:10:45,958 I didn't get your name. 190 00:10:53,750 --> 00:10:54,750 It's Dorothy. 191 00:11:14,292 --> 00:11:15,333 She'd come again, 192 00:11:15,542 --> 00:11:16,708 and with a greedy ear, 193 00:11:17,083 --> 00:11:18,250 devour up my discourse. 194 00:11:22,833 --> 00:11:24,083 ...'twas passing strange, 195 00:11:24,833 --> 00:11:25,833 'twas pitiful. 196 00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:21,292 We're not interested. 197 00:13:21,458 --> 00:13:23,292 Is that you, JJ? 198 00:13:29,958 --> 00:13:31,833 I was just dusting my books. 199 00:13:31,917 --> 00:13:33,583 You need a cleaner, Dozza. 200 00:13:33,708 --> 00:13:35,625 I keep telling you. - I don't want somebody 201 00:13:35,708 --> 00:13:38,208 rummaging around my unmentionables. 202 00:13:39,083 --> 00:13:41,208 This is Scott, my grandson. 203 00:13:41,292 --> 00:13:43,333 So, you're a friend of Dorothy? 204 00:13:44,292 --> 00:13:46,250 Ah, uh, uh... 205 00:13:46,333 --> 00:13:48,333 JJ's a gift from the gods. 206 00:13:48,708 --> 00:13:50,625 He's been a huge help to me. 207 00:13:50,708 --> 00:13:52,792 - Oh yeah? - He wants to be an actor. 208 00:13:53,042 --> 00:13:54,292 I bet he does. 209 00:13:56,208 --> 00:13:58,208 So, you, uh, come round here often? 210 00:13:58,333 --> 00:13:59,333 Every day. 211 00:13:59,417 --> 00:14:00,458 Every day! 212 00:14:00,708 --> 00:14:01,708 Wow! 213 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,000 Besties, then. 214 00:14:03,083 --> 00:14:05,333 More than I can say about you and your father. 215 00:14:05,458 --> 00:14:07,458 And uh, you have actual friends? 216 00:14:08,208 --> 00:14:09,417 - What? - You know. 217 00:14:09,833 --> 00:14:10,833 Friends your own age. 218 00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:13,333 What's age got to do with the price of squid? 219 00:14:13,417 --> 00:14:14,417 It's fish. 220 00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:15,500 What's fish? 221 00:14:15,583 --> 00:14:16,583 You said 'squid'. 222 00:14:17,583 --> 00:14:19,167 Who gives a... 223 00:14:21,542 --> 00:14:22,542 Yep. 224 00:14:22,833 --> 00:14:24,000 Fuck me up the bum! 225 00:14:24,083 --> 00:14:25,125 You're actually joking. 226 00:14:25,208 --> 00:14:26,458 Oh, you're not, actually? 227 00:14:26,958 --> 00:14:29,458 Uh, yeah, I'm literally on my actual way. 228 00:14:31,417 --> 00:14:32,958 - Good news? - I've got to run. 229 00:14:33,542 --> 00:14:36,042 No more dusting your bloody books. 230 00:14:37,292 --> 00:14:40,958 And uh, think about the place that shall not be nameth. 231 00:14:56,417 --> 00:14:57,833 What place is he talking about? 232 00:14:59,583 --> 00:15:03,375 A place one goes to when one can't wipe one's own arse 233 00:15:03,458 --> 00:15:04,458 anymore. 234 00:15:05,458 --> 00:15:09,833 For your information, I am not at that stage yet. 235 00:15:11,458 --> 00:15:12,458 But... 236 00:15:14,208 --> 00:15:19,167 you see, JJ, when one gets to my age, 237 00:15:20,167 --> 00:15:23,958 one becomes a... a burden, of sorts. 238 00:15:25,083 --> 00:15:29,208 People don't realise you still have a soul 239 00:15:30,083 --> 00:15:32,083 that needs to be nourished. 240 00:15:33,167 --> 00:15:34,833 I don't mind being alone. 241 00:15:36,083 --> 00:15:39,083 But I do need company, 242 00:15:40,208 --> 00:15:41,833 and companionship. 243 00:15:42,667 --> 00:15:46,458 Most people my age die alone, undiscovered, 244 00:15:47,458 --> 00:15:49,792 for weeks, months even. 245 00:15:52,708 --> 00:15:55,375 My neighbour, Ian, was found naked, 246 00:15:55,458 --> 00:15:58,958 face down in a bowl of alphabetti spaghetti. 247 00:16:00,708 --> 00:16:01,708 Why was he naked? 248 00:16:02,708 --> 00:16:04,458 I don't really know! 249 00:16:04,958 --> 00:16:07,583 Um, that's neither here nor there. 250 00:16:08,458 --> 00:16:11,708 The point is that after my husband died, 251 00:16:12,958 --> 00:16:16,792 my son moved to the other side of the world 252 00:16:17,333 --> 00:16:18,417 to live his life. 253 00:16:21,042 --> 00:16:23,458 And sadly, through the years, 254 00:16:26,208 --> 00:16:27,333 he made... 255 00:16:28,583 --> 00:16:30,833 no space for me in it. 256 00:16:31,417 --> 00:16:35,167 He no longer knows who I truly am. 257 00:16:36,792 --> 00:16:37,958 Maybe he never did. 258 00:16:39,458 --> 00:16:40,583 So, he sends... 259 00:16:42,208 --> 00:16:44,417 dear Scott to fill in the gaps. 260 00:16:47,333 --> 00:16:49,542 I'm nearly 87, JJ, 261 00:16:50,208 --> 00:16:51,708 and having you here, 262 00:16:52,833 --> 00:16:56,125 helping me with my daily comings and goings, 263 00:16:56,208 --> 00:16:59,458 and I don't just mean my bowels. 264 00:17:03,208 --> 00:17:05,708 No one could possibly imagine 265 00:17:06,833 --> 00:17:08,583 what it means to someone like me. 266 00:17:14,333 --> 00:17:15,333 My... 267 00:17:17,958 --> 00:17:19,292 my body... 268 00:17:20,792 --> 00:17:22,083 ...is failing me. 269 00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:24,208 But my mind... 270 00:17:29,583 --> 00:17:30,583 You've... 271 00:17:30,958 --> 00:17:31,958 made it... 272 00:17:32,833 --> 00:17:33,833 live again. 273 00:17:36,083 --> 00:17:38,208 You see me. 274 00:17:42,458 --> 00:17:43,458 Yes. 275 00:17:44,333 --> 00:17:45,333 That's it. 276 00:17:46,833 --> 00:17:50,667 Perhaps you are the first person... 277 00:17:53,083 --> 00:17:54,083 ever... 278 00:17:56,583 --> 00:17:57,583 truly... 279 00:17:59,708 --> 00:18:00,917 to see me. 280 00:18:06,333 --> 00:18:07,458 And you see me. 281 00:18:23,417 --> 00:18:28,083 "To my son, Peter Woodley, I give my residential home 282 00:18:28,167 --> 00:18:31,333 at 1 Martlett Avenue, absolutely. 283 00:18:32,583 --> 00:18:35,458 To my grandson, Scott Woodley, 284 00:18:35,958 --> 00:18:38,875 I give the sum of £50,000." 285 00:18:38,958 --> 00:18:40,625 Oh, thank Christ for that. 286 00:18:40,708 --> 00:18:43,042 Bloody hell, you actually had me worried there. 287 00:18:43,458 --> 00:18:44,458 God. 288 00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:45,958 Well, go on. 289 00:18:46,208 --> 00:18:47,583 What's he nabbed, then? 290 00:18:48,708 --> 00:18:50,458 "To JJ Bello, 291 00:18:50,917 --> 00:18:54,250 I give my entire play collection, 292 00:18:54,333 --> 00:18:55,958 most importantly, 293 00:18:56,042 --> 00:18:59,583 my copy of The Inheritance 294 00:18:59,958 --> 00:19:01,458 by Matthew Lopez. 295 00:19:01,792 --> 00:19:06,667 Oh, for God's sake, all this bloody fuss over some dusty old books. 296 00:19:07,292 --> 00:19:09,917 Typical Dozza, always bringing the theatrics, eh? 297 00:19:10,708 --> 00:19:13,833 Right? Well, if there's nothing else, I've got to skedaddle. 298 00:19:14,417 --> 00:19:16,417 Nice doing business with you both. 299 00:19:19,292 --> 00:19:22,417 Well, obviously not actual business, but, 300 00:19:23,167 --> 00:19:24,167 you know... 301 00:19:30,833 --> 00:19:31,833 Thank you. 302 00:19:32,208 --> 00:19:34,750 Oh, JJ, Dorothy left a note 303 00:19:34,833 --> 00:19:39,667 saying you might need to revisit Act 2, Scene 1. 304 00:19:40,458 --> 00:19:41,458 Whatever that means.