1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:02:20,598 --> 00:02:23,143 The 1940s were unforgiving, 4 00:02:23,768 --> 00:02:25,894 especially for two men daring 5 00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:27,897 to love each other openly. 6 00:02:28,398 --> 00:02:29,731 They lived in a modest 7 00:02:29,732 --> 00:02:31,733 shack on the outskirts of town, 8 00:02:31,734 --> 00:02:35,446 where the nights were filled with the soft hum of crickets 9 00:02:35,905 --> 00:02:38,825 and the distant whistle of the midnight train. 10 00:02:39,909 --> 00:02:42,579 Their days were long and grueling, 11 00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:46,207 but they found joy in the simple moments. 12 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:47,833 Sharing a meal. 13 00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:49,836 Beans and cornbread. 14 00:02:50,044 --> 00:02:52,380 Tending to their small vegetable garden. 15 00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:55,007 And reading to each other by the dim 16 00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:57,010 light of an oil lamp. 17 00:03:17,864 --> 00:03:19,448 Hi, James. 18 00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:21,325 Hi, Michael. 19 00:03:21,326 --> 00:03:25,371 I, I thought maybe my message was desperate. 20 00:03:26,456 --> 00:03:29,291 No, no, no, I was dealing with some problems 21 00:03:29,292 --> 00:03:31,419 at work, and I haven't had any free time. 22 00:03:31,502 --> 00:03:33,504 I'm so sorry for not calling you back sooner. 23 00:03:34,297 --> 00:03:36,006 Um, no.... that's... 24 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:38,009 That's okay. Um... 25 00:03:38,176 --> 00:03:42,805 We can talk about it, uh, more over dinner. 26 00:03:45,266 --> 00:03:46,183 If you 27 00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:47,976 still want to get together this weekend. 28 00:03:47,977 --> 00:03:49,436 Oh, yeah. Definitely. 29 00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:51,439 I still want to get together this week. 30 00:03:52,607 --> 00:03:53,565 You know, it's 31 00:03:53,566 --> 00:03:55,984 so funny that I met you at the bookstore 32 00:03:55,985 --> 00:03:58,738 and you were supposed to be off that day. 33 00:04:00,698 --> 00:04:02,742 Well, I guess we were supposed to meet. 34 00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:08,039 Oh, how did the gaming book help you? 35 00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:10,500 Oh, yeah, it helped us a lot. 36 00:04:13,836 --> 00:04:15,838 You know, um... 37 00:04:16,756 --> 00:04:17,965 I, I'm really looking forward 38 00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:19,968 to seeing you again. 39 00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:24,554 You know, at the bookstore 40 00:04:24,555 --> 00:04:27,224 I wasn’t even sure 41 00:04:27,225 --> 00:04:30,019 if you were actually into guys. I’m... 42 00:04:30,144 --> 00:04:33,021 I'm terrible at radio signals, but when you told me 43 00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:35,858 you wrote gay novellas... I was so happy. 44 00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:41,113 Oh, uh, I -I, I got a call. 45 00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:43,116 I'm so sorry, I gotta go. 46 00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:46,285 I will see you on Saturday. 47 00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:47,536 That sounds great. 48 00:04:47,537 --> 00:04:49,914 I'll see you then. Definitely. Definitely. 49 00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:51,456 Okay. 50 00:04:51,457 --> 00:04:53,543 Bye. Bye. 51 00:04:58,423 --> 00:04:59,923 Hey, cousin. 52 00:04:59,924 --> 00:05:01,926 What's going on? 53 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:04,554 Another gay romance story. 54 00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,141 Who reads your books, anyway. 55 00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:11,436 You coming over this weekend 56 00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:14,272 to help me with the drywall? 57 00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:16,733 I've been putting it off. 58 00:05:16,774 --> 00:05:18,776 Waiting for you. 59 00:05:20,862 --> 00:05:22,864 They're hiring where I work. 60 00:05:23,239 --> 00:05:24,364 If you're interested. 61 00:05:24,365 --> 00:05:26,367 I already have a job. 62 00:05:27,410 --> 00:05:31,122 Yeah, at the Cozy Nook Book bookstore. 63 00:05:32,206 --> 00:05:34,416 Did you come by to lecture me about my job? 64 00:05:34,417 --> 00:05:36,419 Or about helping you with the drywall? 65 00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:39,254 You know, let's do it next week. 66 00:05:39,255 --> 00:05:41,257 And I've got company coming over this weekend. 67 00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:45,595 Oooh... got yourself a fancy man-date. 68 00:05:49,098 --> 00:05:51,100 You okay?! 69 00:05:53,686 --> 00:05:54,311 You look like that 70 00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:56,814 deer caught my headlights right before I hit him. 71 00:05:58,024 --> 00:06:00,026 Totally messed up the hood of my truck. 72 00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:05,698 What? 73 00:06:05,948 --> 00:06:07,950 What's wrong with you? 74 00:06:10,453 --> 00:06:13,873 Um, I guess I'm just not getting enough sleep. 75 00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:16,459 You go away. Please. 76 00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:18,044 I gotta get ready for work. 77 00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:21,547 Okay. 78 00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:26,219 Let me know about doing the drywall. 79 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,682 People still buy books? 80 00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:34,560 We know you don't. 81 00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:51,785 Cake... 82 00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:52,869 Oh. Hi, neighbor. 83 00:06:52,870 --> 00:06:54,496 Oh. Sorry, Mike. 84 00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:56,081 I didn't mean to scare you. 85 00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:57,916 I saw you pulling stuff in from the car. 86 00:06:57,917 --> 00:06:59,709 I thought I'd give you a hand. 87 00:06:59,710 --> 00:07:02,296 I wanted to stop by and tell you about the Munson place. 88 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:03,964 Thanks. 89 00:07:03,965 --> 00:07:05,757 Um, Munson place? Yeah. 90 00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:06,591 The Munson. 91 00:07:06,592 --> 00:07:09,970 They lived there for a long time, and, well, until Mrs. 92 00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:11,973 Munson was taken away. 93 00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:14,016 You must know about that. 94 00:07:14,475 --> 00:07:16,601 No, I can't say that I have. Oh. 95 00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:16,893 Okay. 96 00:07:16,894 --> 00:07:20,189 Well, the Munson's were together for, like, 30 years, 97 00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:22,399 until one day. 98 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:25,278 I guess she just kind of lost it. 99 00:07:25,903 --> 00:07:27,905 And she wacked him with an ax! 100 00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:31,325 You can see what it did to the neighborhood. 101 00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:34,327 Mmm. Well, 102 00:07:34,328 --> 00:07:36,497 it totally destroyed all the home value here. 103 00:07:36,914 --> 00:07:39,541 So, not that I'm complaining, but that's how 104 00:07:39,542 --> 00:07:41,544 I got into my dandy of a house. 105 00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:43,880 Anyway, it's up for sale now, 106 00:07:44,255 --> 00:07:46,506 and I saw a couple coming out of there 107 00:07:46,507 --> 00:07:48,509 the other day with a realtor, 108 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:51,721 but they looked like they were kind of 109 00:07:51,762 --> 00:07:55,683 dark skinned, like maybe Indian. 110 00:07:56,225 --> 00:07:58,561 Not the wo, wo , wo kind. 111 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,605 Ohhh, Dave, that's racist. 112 00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:03,566 All I'm saying is 113 00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:06,027 not the American type of Indian. 114 00:08:06,527 --> 00:08:08,528 You got to be careful these days, Mike. Dave... 115 00:08:08,529 --> 00:08:10,531 You really can't just. 116 00:08:10,698 --> 00:08:11,531 Uh... I'm sorry. 117 00:08:11,532 --> 00:08:14,118 I've got a lot going on right now, but thanks so much for your help. 118 00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:16,162 Yeah. So, happy to help. Umm... 119 00:08:16,871 --> 00:08:18,371 This is a great looking cake. 120 00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:20,374 You -you having a party or something? 121 00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:22,542 Yeah. Yeah, something. 122 00:08:22,543 --> 00:08:23,419 Thank you so much. 123 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,507 Oh, okay. Uh... 124 00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:29,592 Always good to see you, Mike! 125 00:08:37,058 --> 00:08:39,060 Hello, Michael. 126 00:08:39,143 --> 00:08:41,145 Hi mom. 127 00:08:41,562 --> 00:08:42,604 What are you making? 128 00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:44,607 I just some tacos for dinner tomorrow night. 129 00:08:44,815 --> 00:08:46,776 Did you put cilantro in? 130 00:08:48,736 --> 00:08:50,695 No, I don't like cilantro. 131 00:08:50,696 --> 00:08:51,696 Really? 132 00:08:51,697 --> 00:08:53,448 I've always liked it. 133 00:08:53,449 --> 00:08:55,451 You used to like it, I'm sure. No. 134 00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:57,745 Never did. 135 00:08:59,622 --> 00:09:01,707 What's with the. 136 00:09:01,999 --> 00:09:02,999 What’s with all the food here? 137 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:05,002 I stopped at the food bank. 138 00:09:05,086 --> 00:09:07,088 Oh, you helping somebody out? 139 00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:09,674 I'm helping you out. 140 00:09:09,757 --> 00:09:11,759 I don’t need help, mom? 141 00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:13,886 Well, I got to thinking 142 00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:16,389 about how hard it must be for you lately. 143 00:09:17,265 --> 00:09:20,601 Struggling with your job at the little bookstore 144 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:22,686 and trying to make a go 145 00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:24,689 of the writing thing. 146 00:09:26,774 --> 00:09:28,483 How's everything going with you? 147 00:09:28,484 --> 00:09:30,486 Mmm. 148 00:09:31,904 --> 00:09:32,696 I walked in there 149 00:09:32,697 --> 00:09:37,118 last week on my way to get an anniversary gift for Sister Hanson, 150 00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:39,786 and there was this 151 00:09:39,787 --> 00:09:41,831 little old man behind the counter. (laughs) 152 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:45,083 He couldn't even really see 153 00:09:45,084 --> 00:09:47,086 the cash register keys. 154 00:09:47,253 --> 00:09:49,754 His little sausage fingers trying to type them out 155 00:09:49,755 --> 00:09:51,716 one at a time. 156 00:09:53,509 --> 00:09:54,134 And, well, 157 00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:57,887 finally, it was taking so long that the man buying the book 158 00:09:57,888 --> 00:10:00,765 just up and threw the money on the counter and then flounced 159 00:10:00,766 --> 00:10:02,768 out of the store. 160 00:10:03,227 --> 00:10:04,185 Does that old man 161 00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:06,188 know he needs to be retired? 162 00:10:06,314 --> 00:10:07,689 Or that owner is not going to have 163 00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:09,692 a bookstore for much longer. 164 00:10:10,776 --> 00:10:13,362 My father would never have put up with that. 165 00:10:13,863 --> 00:10:17,198 He knew how to run a company. Grandpa ran a corporate bank, 166 00:10:17,199 --> 00:10:19,201 mom. Not a little bookstore. 167 00:10:22,204 --> 00:10:23,289 These certainly looked better than your last batch. 168 00:10:36,177 --> 00:10:37,720 Something's missing. 169 00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:41,641 You didn’t put nuts in. 170 00:10:41,682 --> 00:10:43,351 The recipe calls for walnuts. 171 00:10:44,352 --> 00:10:45,935 Makes all the difference. 172 00:10:45,936 --> 00:10:47,145 I'm allergic to walnuts. 173 00:10:47,146 --> 00:10:49,106 Mom. Remember? 174 00:10:49,231 --> 00:10:51,233 Oh. That's right. 175 00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:54,779 You have so many physical issues, 176 00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:56,989 I just can't keep them all straight. 177 00:10:59,617 --> 00:11:01,619 Nuts would have made your brownies better. 178 00:11:02,953 --> 00:11:04,788 And yes, you really should tell somebody 179 00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:07,416 about that old man and the trouble he's having. 180 00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:10,086 He should have retired long ago. 181 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,464 That little old man happens to be the owner. 182 00:11:15,549 --> 00:11:17,175 Well, then he should know how to run 183 00:11:17,176 --> 00:11:19,136 a bookstore. 184 00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:24,225 He's ran a bookstore for over 43 years. 185 00:11:25,810 --> 00:11:26,893 He's... a year ago. 186 00:11:26,894 --> 00:11:29,105 His wife of 46 years passed on. 187 00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:32,400 All he has is that little bookstore. 188 00:11:33,442 --> 00:11:35,528 The lonely old house that used to be happy. 189 00:11:36,654 --> 00:11:40,658 We try to lift his spirits up to make him feel happy. 190 00:11:41,158 --> 00:11:44,369 So I suggest you stop judging the poor guy in something you know 191 00:11:44,370 --> 00:11:45,454 Nothing about. 192 00:11:52,336 --> 00:11:53,670 I never... 193 00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:57,049 understand why I upset you so much. 194 00:12:00,010 --> 00:12:02,346 You're frustrated all the time. 195 00:12:03,764 --> 00:12:05,849 You practically formed a witch hunt 196 00:12:05,850 --> 00:12:07,852 to get rid of the new neighbors last year. 197 00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,730 You don't like the minister's sermons? 198 00:12:11,021 --> 00:12:13,691 And even the Mexicans, as you put it, 199 00:12:14,108 --> 00:12:16,025 aren't even good enough for the house of God. 200 00:12:16,026 --> 00:12:18,863 Do you hear the words that are coming out of your mouth? 201 00:12:20,030 --> 00:12:22,366 What kind of Christian are you? 202 00:12:25,911 --> 00:12:27,746 You should turn off the TV. 203 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,749 Go volunteer. Read some books. 204 00:12:29,790 --> 00:12:32,585 We've got lots of great cookbooks. 205 00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:35,087 Take up cooking. 206 00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:40,843 I can't even tell you what's going on in the world. 207 00:12:41,260 --> 00:12:43,262 You don't want to hear it. 208 00:12:44,972 --> 00:12:46,974 Well, it's a mess. 209 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:49,809 And yes, I'm still pissed 210 00:12:49,810 --> 00:12:51,812 about the neighbors. 211 00:12:54,523 --> 00:12:56,901 Every generation says the same thing. 212 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,154 The world is getting bad. 213 00:13:01,822 --> 00:13:02,989 But the world has 214 00:13:02,990 --> 00:13:05,075 a way of figuring things out. 215 00:13:05,993 --> 00:13:08,579 And it needs happier people 216 00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:10,790 helping one another. Mom... 217 00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:15,878 I am trying to build a happier life. 218 00:13:24,512 --> 00:13:26,137 I suppose I do... 219 00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:28,140 get worked up about things. 220 00:13:29,892 --> 00:13:30,975 Your father always said 221 00:13:30,976 --> 00:13:33,854 I could find a storm cloud in a blue sky. 222 00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:36,941 He wasn’t wrong. 223 00:13:40,903 --> 00:13:43,364 These really are better without the nuts. 224 00:13:45,533 --> 00:13:47,535 Okay... 225 00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:49,870 I'll be going. 226 00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:55,542 Maybe... 227 00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:56,835 Maybe I could stop by the bookstore 228 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,796 sometime. 229 00:14:00,339 --> 00:14:02,341 That would be nice. 230 00:14:02,424 --> 00:14:03,883 You know, we got lots of cookbooks 231 00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:05,886 from all over the world. 232 00:14:06,762 --> 00:14:08,764 Okay. 233 00:14:08,931 --> 00:14:10,933 Goodbye, sweetie. 234 00:14:12,309 --> 00:14:14,227 Thanks for the help, mom. 235 00:14:14,228 --> 00:14:16,230 Oh, I love you. 236 00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:18,274 I love you, too. 237 00:14:28,742 --> 00:14:32,495 (chuckles) Sometimes I play pinball 238 00:14:32,496 --> 00:14:34,498 down at the Burger Hut. 239 00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:36,542 That's the closest I got to video gaming. 240 00:14:38,043 --> 00:14:40,212 Well, like being a game designer. 241 00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:41,088 It's fun. 242 00:14:42,756 --> 00:14:44,090 I spend most of my time 243 00:14:44,091 --> 00:14:46,093 just trying to see if it'll work. 244 00:14:48,012 --> 00:14:50,014 Mostly long hours. 245 00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:52,181 Get home to face 246 00:14:52,182 --> 00:14:54,977 a freezer full of microwave dinners. 247 00:14:55,352 --> 00:14:57,354 (Michael Laughs) 248 00:14:58,814 --> 00:15:01,817 Oh no... do I have food in my teeth? 249 00:15:03,277 --> 00:15:03,693 Crap. 250 00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:05,696 I do, don’t I? 251 00:15:07,573 --> 00:15:09,449 No, no. 252 00:15:09,450 --> 00:15:11,452 No food. 253 00:15:12,119 --> 00:15:14,121 You look great. 254 00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:23,254 So um... how'd you get interested 255 00:15:23,255 --> 00:15:25,257 in writing? 256 00:15:25,841 --> 00:15:27,843 Well, 257 00:15:27,968 --> 00:15:30,679 had been reading books for years, 258 00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:34,224 so I thought I'd try writing some myself. 259 00:15:35,976 --> 00:15:38,437 I got into old fashioned gay romance. 260 00:15:39,521 --> 00:15:41,523 It came naturally to me. 261 00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:45,778 Mom didn't get it. 262 00:15:46,236 --> 00:15:48,238 She thinks I should get a real job. 263 00:15:49,365 --> 00:15:51,325 Oh, God. 264 00:15:51,867 --> 00:15:53,869 When I told my dad I wanted to be a gamer, 265 00:15:54,119 --> 00:15:56,497 he walked over the car keys, took them off the hook, 266 00:15:56,830 --> 00:16:01,126 and said, you can get these back when you get serious about your career. 267 00:16:04,088 --> 00:16:06,090 It wasn't about the car. 268 00:16:06,423 --> 00:16:08,425 It was that he didn't even know who I was. 269 00:16:11,053 --> 00:16:13,055 What about your dad? 270 00:16:18,143 --> 00:16:20,145 He died a few years ago. (music) 271 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:23,482 I'm sorry. 272 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,819 He really appreciated my writing. 273 00:16:28,195 --> 00:16:30,197 Just wanted me to be happy. 274 00:16:31,699 --> 00:16:33,701 Well, you're a great writer. 275 00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:37,829 I bought your book 276 00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:39,832 and read it right after we met. 277 00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:44,377 You sure you didn't accidentally 278 00:16:44,378 --> 00:16:46,380 put it in your cart? No. 279 00:16:47,172 --> 00:16:49,174 It's very good. 280 00:16:50,384 --> 00:16:52,386 You had me at paragraph two. 281 00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:56,015 I'm starting your second book next week. 282 00:16:57,349 --> 00:16:59,351 I really appreciate you saying that. 283 00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:04,732 Your stories are set in the 40s. 284 00:17:06,817 --> 00:17:08,902 I mean, it's such a romantic time. 285 00:17:12,281 --> 00:17:14,450 I think I must have lived in the 40s. 286 00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:17,745 I have a strong sense of connection to it. 287 00:17:20,873 --> 00:17:22,875 It's funny. 288 00:17:24,334 --> 00:17:28,589 I've had this recurring dream on and off for years 289 00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:32,509 about a man I meet in a 290 00:17:33,135 --> 00:17:35,095 small town diner. 291 00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:37,805 It's the 40s. 292 00:17:37,806 --> 00:17:39,640 It's winter 293 00:17:39,641 --> 00:17:42,644 and... in the dream, 294 00:17:47,024 --> 00:17:47,899 we don't talk much. 295 00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:49,902 We just sit together. 296 00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,698 Understand each other 297 00:17:55,657 --> 00:17:57,659 without words. 298 00:17:59,078 --> 00:18:01,080 Like we’ve know each other forever. 299 00:18:03,248 --> 00:18:05,250 Maybe... 300 00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:07,419 maybe we're meeting again. 301 00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:10,047 If it's us. 302 00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:14,885 Maybe. 303 00:18:20,057 --> 00:18:23,310 Um, uh... I'm not very good at, uh 304 00:18:23,644 --> 00:18:25,646 speaking for myself. 305 00:18:29,149 --> 00:18:31,151 I know that... 306 00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:33,946 that this is our first date. 307 00:18:35,572 --> 00:18:37,574 Maybe... 308 00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:40,452 Maybe we could have more dates. 309 00:18:44,206 --> 00:18:45,790 I'm just a poor book nerd. 310 00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:49,086 I mean, you can think about it, and... - Yes. 311 00:18:54,466 --> 00:18:56,426 I don't care how much money you make. 312 00:18:57,761 --> 00:18:59,763 Life isn't about status. 313 00:19:02,349 --> 00:19:04,351 I think dating you would be great. 314 00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:08,230 Just like that. 315 00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:10,983 After one date? 316 00:19:11,525 --> 00:19:13,569 One date. 20 dates... 317 00:19:14,736 --> 00:19:16,738 What's it matter? 318 00:19:18,073 --> 00:19:20,075 When you feel like you've known someone... 319 00:19:21,535 --> 00:19:23,537 ... forever. 320 00:19:52,482 --> 00:19:54,484 Yeah. (foreshadowing music) 321 00:20:19,885 --> 00:20:20,676 Hey, Mike. 322 00:20:20,677 --> 00:20:21,178 How are you doing? 323 00:20:22,179 --> 00:20:24,181 Whach’a planting? 324 00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:26,474 You okay 325 00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:28,435 Buddy? 326 00:20:28,727 --> 00:20:30,729 Michael? 327 00:20:31,980 --> 00:20:33,773 You don't look so good. 328 00:20:33,774 --> 00:20:35,024 Had any water today? 329 00:20:35,025 --> 00:20:36,985 Anything to eat? 330 00:20:37,736 --> 00:20:39,237 I brought you some leftover stew 331 00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:41,240 from last night. 332 00:20:43,533 --> 00:20:45,576 Trying to get Ahold of you the last couple of weeks 333 00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:47,662 about going fishing, but I haven't heard anything 334 00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:49,665 back. 335 00:20:52,042 --> 00:20:54,044 Need some help getting inside? 336 00:20:56,380 --> 00:20:58,214 I know how to get inside. 337 00:20:58,215 --> 00:20:58,965 Well, sure, sure. 338 00:20:58,966 --> 00:21:00,424 Of course you do. 339 00:21:00,425 --> 00:21:02,427 Maybe I can just sit with you for a while. 340 00:21:03,053 --> 00:21:05,055 Would that be okay. 341 00:21:07,808 --> 00:21:09,810 Stew... 342 00:21:09,851 --> 00:21:10,184 Stew, 343 00:21:10,185 --> 00:21:12,187 can you help me sit down? 344 00:21:12,354 --> 00:21:12,937 Course. 345 00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:14,855 Of course. Buddy. 346 00:21:14,856 --> 00:21:15,356 I got you. 347 00:21:15,357 --> 00:21:17,359 You're good. 348 00:21:20,195 --> 00:21:22,155 Doing good. 349 00:21:30,580 --> 00:21:31,372 So, anyway, 350 00:21:31,373 --> 00:21:33,834 I brought you some stew from last night. 351 00:21:33,875 --> 00:21:35,877 It's just, 352 00:21:36,211 --> 00:21:37,837 carrots, potatoes, a little venison 353 00:21:37,838 --> 00:21:39,840 I had in the freezer. 354 00:21:40,048 --> 00:21:41,340 Call it stew on a pot! 355 00:21:41,341 --> 00:21:43,468 Because, you know, I'm stew. 356 00:21:46,054 --> 00:21:46,887 I promise 357 00:21:46,888 --> 00:21:48,890 it's a lot better than my jokes. 358 00:21:53,645 --> 00:21:56,148 I’uh... I went fishing a couple of weeks back. 359 00:21:56,898 --> 00:21:58,900 Caught some real nice pike. 360 00:21:59,109 --> 00:21:59,775 Thought about you 361 00:21:59,776 --> 00:22:01,027 while I was out there. 362 00:22:01,028 --> 00:22:03,030 Remember that trip we took in June? 363 00:22:03,739 --> 00:22:05,741 A knife slipped out of my hand 364 00:22:05,991 --> 00:22:07,993 right into my shoe. 365 00:22:09,161 --> 00:22:10,494 And that night, 366 00:22:10,495 --> 00:22:12,497 all those noises outside of our tent. 367 00:22:12,789 --> 00:22:14,791 It was so dark. 368 00:22:17,878 --> 00:22:18,377 Yeah. That was, uh... 369 00:22:18,378 --> 00:22:20,630 That was that was a fun trip. 370 00:22:21,256 --> 00:22:22,423 There you are. 371 00:22:22,424 --> 00:22:24,008 Welcome back, pal. 372 00:22:24,009 --> 00:22:24,342 You had me 373 00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:26,345 worried. 374 00:22:28,638 --> 00:22:30,014 Thank you. 375 00:22:30,015 --> 00:22:32,016 Thank you, Stu, for 376 00:22:32,017 --> 00:22:34,019 sitting with me. 377 00:22:36,938 --> 00:22:38,940 I don't know what happened. 378 00:22:40,942 --> 00:22:43,403 You know, if this is happening more and more... 379 00:22:44,279 --> 00:22:46,072 you need to see a doctor. 380 00:22:46,073 --> 00:22:48,075 You have to take this seriously. 381 00:22:49,659 --> 00:22:51,035 I'll give my doctor a call. 382 00:22:51,036 --> 00:22:52,787 See if I can set something up. 383 00:22:52,788 --> 00:22:53,330 That'll be okay? 384 00:22:54,539 --> 00:22:56,123 Yeah. 385 00:22:56,124 --> 00:22:58,126 (laughing) 386 00:23:01,129 --> 00:23:03,131 That was... 387 00:23:03,590 --> 00:23:05,675 that was such a fun fishing trip. 388 00:23:06,885 --> 00:23:11,139 And you... you got so panicked 389 00:23:11,765 --> 00:23:13,224 when you stabbed your foot. 390 00:23:13,225 --> 00:23:16,019 I don't know that I was panicking. 391 00:23:16,686 --> 00:23:18,688 Okay, well, I mean, maybe a little. 392 00:23:18,855 --> 00:23:20,439 All the blood... 393 00:23:20,440 --> 00:23:22,442 Okay. That's -that's just our little joke. 394 00:23:23,026 --> 00:23:24,986 Yeah. 395 00:23:41,586 --> 00:23:41,794 (door knock) Hello 396 00:23:41,795 --> 00:23:43,754 Michael. 397 00:23:43,755 --> 00:23:45,715 Thank you for your patience. 398 00:23:46,216 --> 00:23:48,760 I know it's uh... difficult waiting. 399 00:23:52,180 --> 00:23:53,013 I got your report 400 00:23:53,014 --> 00:23:55,058 back, and I reviewed it very carefully. 401 00:23:56,309 --> 00:24:03,441 And, I uh... (anxious) I have the difficult news to tell you that the results indicate 402 00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:06,193 that you have a condition called early-onset 403 00:24:06,194 --> 00:24:11,324 Alzheimer's. 404 00:24:13,118 --> 00:24:15,120 I... I don't understand. 405 00:24:15,203 --> 00:24:15,619 I can't. 406 00:24:15,620 --> 00:24:17,496 I can't have Alzheimer's. I'm... 407 00:24:17,497 --> 00:24:18,372 I'm not old. 408 00:24:18,373 --> 00:24:20,375 It's uncommon, 409 00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:22,751 but it does happen to people under 65 410 00:24:22,752 --> 00:24:24,754 and sometimes under 50. 411 00:24:26,131 --> 00:24:28,133 And unfortunately, Michael, 412 00:24:28,842 --> 00:24:30,426 you have 413 00:24:30,427 --> 00:24:31,470 all of the signs of it. 414 00:24:38,602 --> 00:24:39,685 Now, I'm not going to lie to you. 415 00:24:39,686 --> 00:24:41,688 This is going to be a challenge. 416 00:24:43,023 --> 00:24:45,025 And I'm sorry, but 417 00:24:45,984 --> 00:24:47,986 it will progress over time. 418 00:24:48,069 --> 00:24:50,739 He may experience memory loss, confusion, 419 00:24:51,740 --> 00:24:53,532 difficulty remembering words, 420 00:24:53,533 --> 00:24:55,869 difficulty talking or coming up with those words. 421 00:24:56,745 --> 00:24:58,705 Mood swings. 422 00:24:58,830 --> 00:24:59,246 Trouble 423 00:24:59,247 --> 00:25:01,249 walking. 424 00:25:02,334 --> 00:25:04,753 And eventually, severe... memory loss. 425 00:25:08,423 --> 00:25:10,425 I'm going to, uh... 426 00:25:10,634 --> 00:25:11,383 have someone call you 427 00:25:11,384 --> 00:25:13,386 and set up a session with a counselor. 428 00:25:14,804 --> 00:25:16,806 I don't need a counselor. 429 00:25:17,682 --> 00:25:19,684 Michael... 430 00:25:20,477 --> 00:25:22,479 I know that this is overwhelming, 431 00:25:23,146 --> 00:25:25,148 but it's important to have support. 432 00:25:25,732 --> 00:25:27,734 Now, a counselor, can 433 00:25:27,943 --> 00:25:29,735 help you with what to expect. 434 00:25:29,736 --> 00:25:30,486 Make a plan. 435 00:25:30,487 --> 00:25:32,489 Just have someone to talk to. 436 00:25:35,492 --> 00:25:37,494 You don't have to do this alone. 437 00:25:42,916 --> 00:25:44,918 Am I... 438 00:25:50,173 --> 00:25:52,175 Am I going to die? 439 00:25:56,471 --> 00:25:58,138 Michael, the... 440 00:25:58,139 --> 00:26:00,517 average life expectancy is, six years. 441 00:26:04,604 --> 00:26:05,062 But I mean, 442 00:26:05,063 --> 00:26:07,481 there are cases where people live 15, 20 years. 443 00:26:07,482 --> 00:26:07,899 It's just, uh, 444 00:26:09,109 --> 00:26:10,985 it's not very common. 445 00:26:10,986 --> 00:26:12,988 I'm sorry. 446 00:26:14,281 --> 00:26:16,115 We're going to, uh... 447 00:26:16,116 --> 00:26:18,118 start you up with a group of medication 448 00:26:19,327 --> 00:26:21,329 to help with, uh... (doctor chokes up) 449 00:26:27,002 --> 00:26:28,961 To help with your mental function. 450 00:26:28,962 --> 00:26:30,964 And slow the progress of the disease. 451 00:26:34,843 --> 00:26:35,134 Michael, 452 00:26:35,135 --> 00:26:35,551 I'm sorry. 453 00:26:35,552 --> 00:26:37,554 This is... this is overwhelming. 454 00:26:39,431 --> 00:26:40,848 These will be oral medications. 455 00:26:40,849 --> 00:26:43,225 That’ll help maintain cognitive function 456 00:26:43,226 --> 00:26:45,228 and reduce behavioral symptoms. 457 00:26:46,521 --> 00:26:48,648 And we'll get you started in an intravenous infusion 458 00:26:49,190 --> 00:26:51,192 that has real promise... 459 00:26:51,651 --> 00:26:53,695 of slowing the progression. 460 00:27:40,533 --> 00:27:56,091 Why?... I’m not supposed to go. 461 00:27:57,967 --> 00:27:59,969 I wanna stay... with James. 462 00:28:02,097 --> 00:28:04,099 We had a happy life together. 463 00:28:08,645 --> 00:28:10,647 I’m not supposed to go... 464 00:28:20,407 --> 00:28:22,409 What do I do?... 465 00:28:36,923 --> 00:28:39,008 Look, I know this is a lot to process, 466 00:28:40,343 --> 00:28:42,344 but I'm here to help you. 467 00:28:42,345 --> 00:28:44,347 One step at a time. 468 00:28:45,098 --> 00:28:47,933 I'm just trying to make sense of everything. 469 00:28:47,934 --> 00:28:51,396 It all feels so unreal. 470 00:28:51,438 --> 00:28:53,440 You're not alone, Michael. 471 00:28:54,774 --> 00:28:57,068 There's a gradual progression of this, 472 00:28:57,736 --> 00:28:59,237 but there are things that we can do 473 00:29:00,488 --> 00:29:02,490 to help slow it down. And uh... 474 00:29:03,700 --> 00:29:05,827 help maintain a good quality of life. 475 00:29:07,579 --> 00:29:09,581 I just don't want to be a burden on my... 476 00:29:10,665 --> 00:29:12,667 my mom or James. 477 00:29:12,834 --> 00:29:14,585 You're not a burden, Michael. 478 00:29:14,586 --> 00:29:17,546 And with proper care and maintenance, you can still be 479 00:29:17,547 --> 00:29:19,549 an active part of their lives. 480 00:29:22,302 --> 00:29:24,304 Have you told them about this, Michael? 481 00:29:25,847 --> 00:29:27,849 I haven't told them. 482 00:29:30,894 --> 00:29:33,104 Communication is key. 483 00:29:33,605 --> 00:29:35,564 It will help ease your worries. 484 00:29:35,565 --> 00:29:37,483 It'll help ease their worries. 485 00:29:37,484 --> 00:29:39,903 It'll help them best understand how to help you. 486 00:29:42,864 --> 00:29:44,865 Routine is your friend. 487 00:29:44,866 --> 00:29:46,784 Try creating a daily routine 488 00:29:46,785 --> 00:29:48,787 where you do things that will 489 00:29:49,037 --> 00:29:50,829 help you with memory loss 490 00:29:50,830 --> 00:29:52,832 and less confusion. 491 00:29:53,166 --> 00:29:55,293 Try creating a calendar of activities. 492 00:29:55,335 --> 00:29:57,754 Do things like reading a book. 493 00:29:59,339 --> 00:30:00,839 Puzzles. 494 00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:03,718 Those things will keep your mind sharp, 495 00:30:05,678 --> 00:30:09,098 but also do activities that make you happy. 496 00:30:13,478 --> 00:30:15,522 It's just hard not to feel down. 497 00:30:16,898 --> 00:30:18,900 But you have a team, Michael. 498 00:30:19,359 --> 00:30:20,776 You have friends. 499 00:30:20,777 --> 00:30:21,985 You have family. 500 00:30:21,986 --> 00:30:23,904 You have professionals like me 501 00:30:23,905 --> 00:30:25,907 all working together to help you. 502 00:30:30,078 --> 00:30:32,080 You’re still you, Michael. 503 00:30:34,666 --> 00:30:35,916 And that's 504 00:30:35,917 --> 00:30:37,919 what's most important. 505 00:30:40,505 --> 00:30:42,507 Not too long ago, 506 00:30:42,632 --> 00:30:45,176 I was going through a really hard time. 507 00:30:47,303 --> 00:30:49,304 And I met somebody, 508 00:30:49,305 --> 00:30:51,266 and they helped me. 509 00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:55,562 See a new outlook. 510 00:30:56,938 --> 00:31:00,065 It was in Cherokee spiritual advisor. 511 00:31:00,066 --> 00:31:02,317 And I know that's not in everybody's wheelhouse or something 512 00:31:02,318 --> 00:31:04,320 they would do. 513 00:31:06,406 --> 00:31:08,408 He saved me. 514 00:31:10,660 --> 00:31:12,662 By helping me find... 515 00:31:14,122 --> 00:31:16,124 some inner peace. 516 00:31:23,590 --> 00:31:25,592 Only if you're interested. 517 00:31:27,010 --> 00:31:29,012 I'll write his number down for you. 518 00:32:48,883 --> 00:32:50,885 You okay, sweetheart? 519 00:32:53,471 --> 00:32:55,222 Something wrong? 520 00:32:55,223 --> 00:32:57,225 No. Stop! 521 00:32:58,309 --> 00:33:00,311 I'm sorry. 522 00:33:01,896 --> 00:33:03,898 I'm sorry. 523 00:33:04,816 --> 00:33:05,565 I'm sorry. 524 00:33:05,566 --> 00:33:07,568 You're so... 525 00:33:07,694 --> 00:33:09,696 You're so wonderful to me. 526 00:33:13,574 --> 00:33:14,825 If you find yourself 527 00:33:14,826 --> 00:33:18,162 thinking that, you might feel trapped. 528 00:33:20,248 --> 00:33:22,250 I just want you to know that 529 00:33:22,917 --> 00:33:24,919 it's okay if you want to change your mind 530 00:33:26,087 --> 00:33:28,089 about us. 531 00:33:31,759 --> 00:33:33,761 Michael... 532 00:33:34,303 --> 00:33:36,305 what are you talking about? 533 00:33:39,517 --> 00:33:41,519 I'll never change my mind. 534 00:33:45,481 --> 00:33:47,483 I’m not going to leave you? 535 00:33:52,113 --> 00:33:54,115 Do you want me to leave? - No. 536 00:33:55,575 --> 00:33:57,577 No, I don't ever want you to leave me. 537 00:34:00,246 --> 00:34:02,248 I love you. 538 00:34:02,957 --> 00:34:04,959 I love you. 539 00:34:06,294 --> 00:34:08,296 You're my everything. 540 00:34:14,594 --> 00:34:18,555 Hey. If there's something 541 00:34:18,556 --> 00:34:20,516 weighing on your mind. 542 00:34:21,309 --> 00:34:23,311 You can tell me. 543 00:34:24,645 --> 00:34:26,063 I don't want you to ever think 544 00:34:26,064 --> 00:34:28,066 you can't talk to me. 545 00:34:28,316 --> 00:34:30,318 Okay? 546 00:34:30,401 --> 00:34:32,403 M-huh. 547 00:34:33,196 --> 00:34:35,156 I'm here for you. 548 00:34:35,656 --> 00:34:37,658 Always. 549 00:35:36,551 --> 00:35:38,553 Michael, I want you to close your eyes... 550 00:35:39,595 --> 00:35:41,597 and take a deep breath. 551 00:35:47,478 --> 00:35:50,064 Now, tell me what you're feeling now. 552 00:35:50,106 --> 00:35:52,108 Don't think about it. Just speak. 553 00:35:52,150 --> 00:35:53,859 I'm scared. 554 00:35:53,860 --> 00:35:55,110 Angry. 555 00:35:55,111 --> 00:35:57,113 Confused. 556 00:35:57,446 --> 00:35:59,448 Why me? Why? 557 00:36:00,366 --> 00:36:01,908 I had a life ahead of me. 558 00:36:01,909 --> 00:36:03,786 And now it's all slipping away. 559 00:36:05,997 --> 00:36:07,999 Open your eyes, Michael. 560 00:36:10,334 --> 00:36:12,336 You're asking the big questions now. 561 00:36:12,628 --> 00:36:14,630 And that's where healing begins. But... 562 00:36:15,631 --> 00:36:17,633 first, we need to shift your perspective. 563 00:36:18,342 --> 00:36:20,386 You see your diagnosis as an ending. 564 00:36:20,636 --> 00:36:22,638 But what if it's a beginning? 565 00:36:24,640 --> 00:36:26,642 But I'm dying. 566 00:36:27,101 --> 00:36:28,852 My mind, it's... 567 00:36:28,853 --> 00:36:30,855 It's betraying me. 568 00:36:41,073 --> 00:36:43,075 Feel that stone. 569 00:36:44,285 --> 00:36:46,119 Really feel it. 570 00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:48,456 That stone has existed for thousands of years. 571 00:36:48,915 --> 00:36:51,167 It's been shaped by time, by the elements. 572 00:36:51,667 --> 00:36:53,585 Just like you and me. 573 00:36:53,586 --> 00:36:55,588 We're all part of something 574 00:36:55,838 --> 00:36:57,840 much bigger than ourselves. 575 00:36:58,758 --> 00:37:00,300 But what's the point? 576 00:37:00,301 --> 00:37:03,345 Why am I here if I'm just going to fade away? 577 00:37:03,346 --> 00:37:06,515 The point is to recognize the miracle of your existence. 578 00:37:06,849 --> 00:37:08,851 Every moment is a gift. 579 00:37:08,893 --> 00:37:11,019 Your life isn't defined by its length, 580 00:37:11,020 --> 00:37:13,022 but by its depth. 581 00:37:15,316 --> 00:37:17,318 But I'm so angry. 582 00:37:17,526 --> 00:37:20,820 I don't want to leave James... or my work. 583 00:37:20,821 --> 00:37:22,823 The anger, that fear... 584 00:37:23,032 --> 00:37:26,953 It's all valid, but it's also an anchor weighing you down. 585 00:37:31,290 --> 00:37:33,292 Michael. 586 00:37:33,793 --> 00:37:35,795 There was a time when I was lost. 587 00:37:36,337 --> 00:37:37,420 Angry at the world. 588 00:37:37,421 --> 00:37:39,423 Just like you are now. 589 00:37:41,092 --> 00:37:42,676 My husband, Tom was diagnosed 590 00:37:42,677 --> 00:37:44,679 with an aggressive form of cancer. 591 00:37:47,431 --> 00:37:49,433 We had our whole lives ahead of us. 592 00:37:50,559 --> 00:37:52,269 Suddenly, 593 00:37:52,270 --> 00:37:54,104 everything changed. 594 00:37:54,105 --> 00:37:56,065 What happened? 595 00:37:57,191 --> 00:37:59,193 We fought hard for two years. 596 00:37:59,568 --> 00:38:01,027 We battled the disease together. 597 00:38:01,028 --> 00:38:03,030 But in the end, 598 00:38:04,198 --> 00:38:06,200 I lost him... 599 00:38:06,575 --> 00:38:08,577 and I lost myself. 600 00:38:09,537 --> 00:38:11,539 I was consumed with grief and anger. 601 00:38:11,622 --> 00:38:13,624 I couldn't understand why this happened. 602 00:38:14,750 --> 00:38:16,751 I turned to alcohol, 603 00:38:16,752 --> 00:38:18,754 pushed away my friends and family. 604 00:38:18,921 --> 00:38:20,255 I was dying inside long 605 00:38:20,256 --> 00:38:22,258 before my body gave out. 606 00:38:23,551 --> 00:38:25,553 What changed? 607 00:38:26,345 --> 00:38:27,220 One night, 608 00:38:27,221 --> 00:38:29,139 after drinking myself into a stupor, 609 00:38:29,140 --> 00:38:31,267 I found myself on the edge of a cliff, ready to jump. 610 00:38:33,227 --> 00:38:35,020 But something... 611 00:38:35,021 --> 00:38:37,023 Something stopped me. 612 00:38:37,481 --> 00:38:39,274 Maybe it was the wind. 613 00:38:39,275 --> 00:38:42,694 My spirit guide, my ancestors reaching out. 614 00:38:42,695 --> 00:38:45,489 But in that moment, I realized I had a choice. 615 00:38:46,324 --> 00:38:47,825 I could let the pain destroy me, 616 00:38:49,618 --> 00:38:50,618 or I could use it 617 00:38:50,619 --> 00:38:52,747 to grow, to help others. 618 00:38:53,998 --> 00:38:55,957 It wasn't easy, but I chose to live, 619 00:38:55,958 --> 00:38:56,708 Michael. 620 00:38:56,709 --> 00:38:58,711 Really live. 621 00:39:00,087 --> 00:39:02,089 I sought out the wisdom of my elders. 622 00:39:02,298 --> 00:39:05,384 Re-connected with my medicine... and the earth 623 00:39:06,510 --> 00:39:08,929 and slowly I found my way to healing. 624 00:39:10,139 --> 00:39:12,850 True healing comes from restoring harmony 625 00:39:13,601 --> 00:39:15,603 with ourselves, with the natural world. 626 00:39:17,355 --> 00:39:19,230 Sometimes the deepest wounds 627 00:39:19,231 --> 00:39:21,358 can become our greatest source of strength 628 00:39:21,359 --> 00:39:23,361 and wisdom. 629 00:39:24,653 --> 00:39:26,196 If I can find meaning and purpose 630 00:39:26,197 --> 00:39:28,199 after losing the love of my life, 631 00:39:28,657 --> 00:39:30,659 you can too. 632 00:39:30,868 --> 00:39:32,786 Your path is different than mine, 633 00:39:32,787 --> 00:39:34,789 but the choice is the same. 634 00:39:35,122 --> 00:39:37,416 Will you let this diagnosis define you? 635 00:39:37,833 --> 00:39:39,835 Or will you use it to live? 636 00:39:39,919 --> 00:39:41,921 Truly live, Michael. 637 00:39:42,254 --> 00:39:43,922 Nothing ends. 638 00:39:43,923 --> 00:39:46,050 Energy transforms. 639 00:39:48,010 --> 00:39:50,388 But how do I find peace 640 00:39:50,888 --> 00:39:52,431 without losing myself? 641 00:39:55,684 --> 00:39:59,438 By realizing that your self is more 642 00:40:00,189 --> 00:40:03,317 than your thoughts and your daily routines. 643 00:40:04,026 --> 00:40:06,028 It's the love you've given, 644 00:40:06,112 --> 00:40:07,987 the lives you've touched, 645 00:40:07,988 --> 00:40:09,990 the ripples you've created in the world. 646 00:40:11,033 --> 00:40:13,244 Those things go on long after we're gone. 647 00:40:14,912 --> 00:40:17,414 In my tradition, we believe that every soul 648 00:40:17,415 --> 00:40:19,667 comes to this planet with a purpose. 649 00:40:21,210 --> 00:40:23,212 A life contract, if you will. 650 00:40:23,879 --> 00:40:26,882 Sometimes that purpose isn't what we... 651 00:40:27,258 --> 00:40:29,259 what we planned, what we expect 652 00:40:29,260 --> 00:40:31,262 or planned for. 653 00:40:33,305 --> 00:40:36,350 And you think this disease... 654 00:40:37,435 --> 00:40:40,062 is a part of my purpose? 655 00:40:40,980 --> 00:40:42,939 I think it's presenting you with a choice. 656 00:40:42,940 --> 00:40:45,609 To live more fully, to love more deeply. 657 00:40:45,818 --> 00:40:48,904 To let go of what truly doesn't matter. 658 00:40:50,906 --> 00:40:52,908 That's why I'm here, my friend. 659 00:40:53,075 --> 00:40:55,077 We'll walk this path together. 660 00:40:59,498 --> 00:41:01,125 I want to be together with James. 661 00:41:02,168 --> 00:41:04,170 I really do love him. 662 00:41:06,922 --> 00:41:10,509 He, um... he proposed to me a few nights ago. 663 00:41:12,344 --> 00:41:14,304 I would be happy 664 00:41:14,305 --> 00:41:16,390 if it wasn't for the fact that I... 665 00:41:17,433 --> 00:41:19,058 I didn't tell him the truth. 666 00:41:19,059 --> 00:41:21,061 I could have, 667 00:41:21,187 --> 00:41:25,149 but all I could say was yes. 668 00:41:27,276 --> 00:41:29,278 Michael... 669 00:41:30,779 --> 00:41:33,365 Sometimes when something like this happens, 670 00:41:34,074 --> 00:41:35,867 it can rob us of our most basic 671 00:41:35,868 --> 00:41:38,913 sense of agency and personhood. 672 00:41:42,666 --> 00:41:44,668 I know you're tired. 673 00:41:45,753 --> 00:41:47,755 You must be 674 00:41:48,255 --> 00:41:50,257 exhausted. 675 00:41:51,258 --> 00:41:54,595 But if you're looking for a sign, 676 00:41:55,262 --> 00:41:57,264 if you need permission, 677 00:41:58,265 --> 00:41:59,891 let me be that sign. 678 00:41:59,892 --> 00:42:01,476 Let me be the person to give you 679 00:42:01,477 --> 00:42:03,479 permission, to go. 680 00:42:03,979 --> 00:42:04,812 Go forth. 681 00:42:04,813 --> 00:42:06,272 Go ahead. 682 00:42:06,273 --> 00:42:08,275 Go for it, Michael. 683 00:42:13,447 --> 00:42:15,449 Okay. 684 00:42:19,036 --> 00:42:20,996 So, how's Winnie doing? 685 00:42:21,205 --> 00:42:21,913 He's doing well. 686 00:42:21,914 --> 00:42:23,916 He's going to open his own barber shop. 687 00:42:24,375 --> 00:42:26,543 So, anyway, Professor Stanley and I, we're 688 00:42:26,544 --> 00:42:28,753 looking for this old case of vintage port. 689 00:42:28,754 --> 00:42:30,756 And we come across this really old 690 00:42:31,006 --> 00:42:34,176 beat up crate hidden right there under the stairs. 691 00:42:34,343 --> 00:42:36,345 And it was dated 1834. 692 00:42:36,595 --> 00:42:38,847 So we're going to take it back to the college and open it up. 693 00:42:39,223 --> 00:42:40,890 Might be a worthwhile find inside, 694 00:42:40,891 --> 00:42:44,352 or it might be a scary old monster from 1834. 695 00:42:44,353 --> 00:42:45,603 Boy, that sort of would suck. 696 00:42:45,604 --> 00:42:46,814 Could you imagine? It's got my arm! 697 00:42:48,232 --> 00:42:50,234 It was in my face off! 698 00:42:50,568 --> 00:42:52,570 Sounds like you do that a few. Hey. 699 00:42:52,653 --> 00:42:53,152 Oh, hi. 700 00:42:53,153 --> 00:42:55,155 Henry's told me you're a very good writer. 701 00:42:55,447 --> 00:42:57,575 I wouldn't say very good. 702 00:42:58,242 --> 00:43:00,034 He's a very humble guy. 703 00:43:00,035 --> 00:43:02,037 How's the new book coming? 704 00:43:02,621 --> 00:43:04,623 I'm still trying to figure out some of the characters. 705 00:43:04,707 --> 00:43:06,709 Oh. What's the title? I’ll keep a lookout for it. 706 00:43:07,418 --> 00:43:09,545 I haven't quite figured that out either. 707 00:43:10,087 --> 00:43:12,046 Well, have to stop by the bookstore next week. 708 00:43:12,047 --> 00:43:13,590 Pick up one of your books. 709 00:43:13,591 --> 00:43:15,926 Well, if you'll pardon me, I gotta get ready. 710 00:43:16,260 --> 00:43:19,220 Hey, so, how's 711 00:43:19,221 --> 00:43:21,223 the other science fiction writing going? 712 00:43:21,849 --> 00:43:24,727 I find every excuse there is to put it off. 713 00:43:25,519 --> 00:43:26,978 I know I should be trying to write 714 00:43:26,979 --> 00:43:28,981 every day. 715 00:43:29,315 --> 00:43:31,441 I've just got to stop the nonsense. 716 00:43:31,442 --> 00:43:33,611 I feel like I've lost interest in everything. 717 00:43:34,278 --> 00:43:35,695 That sounds like depression. 718 00:43:35,696 --> 00:43:37,864 Yeah, well, I wake up almost every night 719 00:43:37,865 --> 00:43:39,867 with an anxiety attack. 720 00:43:39,908 --> 00:43:41,492 Please don't tell anyone. 721 00:43:41,493 --> 00:43:43,661 But I actually went back to work part time 722 00:43:43,662 --> 00:43:45,664 stocking auto parts at King's Auto. 723 00:43:46,665 --> 00:43:48,166 I'm supposed to be this somewhat 724 00:43:48,167 --> 00:43:51,794 successful writer, and I can't even write one book a year. 725 00:43:51,795 --> 00:43:53,880 I put so much pressure on yourself there, Henry. 726 00:43:53,881 --> 00:43:55,882 It's going to come naturally. 727 00:43:55,883 --> 00:43:57,717 Right. What you're most passionate about. 728 00:43:57,718 --> 00:43:58,509 Yeah. 729 00:43:58,510 --> 00:44:00,763 Would you mind having coffee with me sometime? 730 00:44:00,929 --> 00:44:03,057 I'd like to get your opinion on some ideas. 731 00:44:04,725 --> 00:44:05,266 Sure, man. 732 00:44:05,267 --> 00:44:07,269 Of course, I'd be happy to. 733 00:44:07,603 --> 00:44:09,855 I am happy, really happy for you and James. 734 00:44:10,064 --> 00:44:11,314 Just talked with him earlier. 735 00:44:11,315 --> 00:44:13,317 He seems like a wonderful guy. 736 00:44:14,109 --> 00:44:16,403 Hey, we've got to get you married. 737 00:44:17,071 --> 00:44:19,281 Let's go. Oh. 738 00:44:22,117 --> 00:44:23,368 We are gathered here today 739 00:44:23,369 --> 00:44:26,205 to celebrate the union of Michael and James. 740 00:44:27,498 --> 00:44:28,956 Today, they stand before you 741 00:44:28,957 --> 00:44:30,959 to declare their love for one another. 742 00:44:31,752 --> 00:44:34,838 This moment is a testament to their journey together. 743 00:44:35,255 --> 00:44:38,634 Filled with love, laughter and shared dreams. 744 00:44:41,261 --> 00:44:42,553 As they exchange their vows. 745 00:44:42,554 --> 00:44:45,849 Let us all be reminded of the beauty of love 746 00:44:47,101 --> 00:44:49,103 and the hope it holds for the future. 747 00:44:50,521 --> 00:44:52,523 Michael and James, please hold hands 748 00:44:52,898 --> 00:44:54,900 and look each other in the eyes. 749 00:44:55,984 --> 00:44:57,986 Those hands will build your future. 750 00:44:58,696 --> 00:45:00,698 Support you in times of need 751 00:45:01,031 --> 00:45:03,033 and hold you in moments of joy. 752 00:45:04,660 --> 00:45:06,786 May we have the rings? And please 753 00:45:06,787 --> 00:45:08,789 exchange your vows. 754 00:45:18,132 --> 00:45:20,134 Michael... 755 00:45:21,343 --> 00:45:23,345 You're my best friend 756 00:45:23,679 --> 00:45:25,681 and my greatest love. 757 00:45:27,224 --> 00:45:29,142 I promise 758 00:45:29,143 --> 00:45:30,935 to stand by you. 759 00:45:30,936 --> 00:45:32,938 To support your dreams. 760 00:45:34,064 --> 00:45:36,316 And to cherish every moment with you. 761 00:45:37,317 --> 00:45:38,985 Together 762 00:45:38,986 --> 00:45:41,905 I vow to love you with all my heart. 763 00:45:42,948 --> 00:45:45,534 To be your rock in times of need. 764 00:46:03,177 --> 00:46:05,179 James... 765 00:46:05,804 --> 00:46:08,766 You are my light, my home. 766 00:46:09,850 --> 00:46:12,978 With you I found a deep and pure love. 767 00:46:14,605 --> 00:46:18,066 I promise to honor and respect you. 768 00:46:18,776 --> 00:46:20,903 To be patient and kind. 769 00:46:22,654 --> 00:46:24,907 And always communicate openly. 770 00:46:26,742 --> 00:46:28,744 I love you 771 00:46:29,203 --> 00:46:31,205 more than words can express. 772 00:46:33,916 --> 00:46:35,291 James and Michael, 773 00:46:35,292 --> 00:46:37,294 having declared your love for each other 774 00:46:37,336 --> 00:46:39,338 in front of your friends and family. 775 00:46:39,421 --> 00:46:41,423 It is my honor and privilege 776 00:46:41,465 --> 00:46:43,467 to announce you married. 777 00:46:43,926 --> 00:46:45,928 You may now kiss. 778 00:46:54,520 --> 00:46:55,520 Thanks, Aunt Joan. 779 00:46:55,521 --> 00:46:57,523 Looks great. 780 00:46:57,648 --> 00:46:59,398 The wedding was wonderful. 781 00:46:59,399 --> 00:47:01,401 You guys kissed? 782 00:47:01,652 --> 00:47:03,110 Yes. We did. 783 00:47:03,111 --> 00:47:04,654 Too bad you missed it. 784 00:47:04,655 --> 00:47:06,657 I couldn't make it. 785 00:47:06,824 --> 00:47:08,992 I was on my way back from Bentonville. 786 00:47:09,409 --> 00:47:11,411 That's in Arkansas. 787 00:47:11,745 --> 00:47:13,914 I had a job interview at Walmart headquarters. 788 00:47:14,623 --> 00:47:16,207 Thanks for doing the cooking, mom. 789 00:47:16,208 --> 00:47:18,210 Oh, it was nothing. 790 00:47:18,460 --> 00:47:20,838 Anyway, I got to ride on a nice plane. 791 00:47:22,214 --> 00:47:23,172 Did he have some of those 792 00:47:23,173 --> 00:47:25,174 little peanut snacks on the plane? 793 00:47:25,175 --> 00:47:28,469 No, but I did get to sit by a crying baby 794 00:47:28,470 --> 00:47:30,472 and a drunk woman. 795 00:47:30,556 --> 00:47:33,308 And I had one of those foreign flight attendants. 796 00:47:33,809 --> 00:47:35,768 He must have been from one of them, 797 00:47:35,769 --> 00:47:38,272 Zimbabwe countries or something. 798 00:47:39,106 --> 00:47:41,525 His accent was so bad. 799 00:47:42,192 --> 00:47:43,402 But it was a free ticket... 800 00:47:44,403 --> 00:47:46,405 and the drinks were free. 801 00:47:46,655 --> 00:47:48,657 I had three of them. 802 00:47:50,158 --> 00:47:52,160 But he was such a doofus. 803 00:47:52,494 --> 00:47:55,162 I don't understand why they can't 804 00:47:55,163 --> 00:47:58,542 hire English speak’n Americans. 805 00:47:59,751 --> 00:48:01,127 Well, maybe he had a chance 806 00:48:01,128 --> 00:48:03,129 to earn a good income. 807 00:48:03,130 --> 00:48:05,799 Maybe he had a chance at a better life. 808 00:48:06,758 --> 00:48:08,384 Maybe he was poor 809 00:48:08,385 --> 00:48:10,345 and had dreams of a better life. 810 00:48:10,846 --> 00:48:12,848 Do you ever think about the things you say?! 811 00:48:13,432 --> 00:48:15,434 About the way you treat people? 812 00:48:15,601 --> 00:48:17,603 What are you talking about? 813 00:48:19,396 --> 00:48:19,812 Joan, 814 00:48:19,813 --> 00:48:21,899 this is just delicious. 815 00:48:21,940 --> 00:48:23,316 Thank you. 816 00:48:23,317 --> 00:48:25,444 I don't get the chance to cook for a group, 817 00:48:25,652 --> 00:48:27,654 so I thought this lunch would be fun. 818 00:48:29,114 --> 00:48:31,115 I don't know what they put in food these days, 819 00:48:31,116 --> 00:48:33,368 but it doesn't taste like it did years ago. 820 00:48:35,454 --> 00:48:38,498 It's all the laboratory made ingredients going into the food. 821 00:48:39,875 --> 00:48:42,501 Well I had stomach problems for years 822 00:48:42,502 --> 00:48:45,464 and then I went organic and it cleared up in a few weeks. 823 00:48:46,882 --> 00:48:48,884 You know Michael's dad had that problem 824 00:48:49,301 --> 00:48:51,303 and Michael is just like his dad. 825 00:48:51,845 --> 00:48:53,931 He was always having stomach problems. 826 00:48:57,225 --> 00:48:59,227 I'm sorry honey, I gotta get going. 827 00:48:59,686 --> 00:49:02,563 I won't be too late. But when I get back, 828 00:49:02,564 --> 00:49:04,691 we'll stay up and watch all movies. 829 00:49:07,736 --> 00:49:09,153 Great seeing everyone. 830 00:49:09,154 --> 00:49:10,321 I am so sorry. 831 00:49:10,322 --> 00:49:12,198 I can't believe it, but I gotta get going. 832 00:49:12,199 --> 00:49:15,826 We had a sudden game release coming up tomorrow and couldn't have been worse. 833 00:49:15,827 --> 00:49:17,411 timing. 834 00:49:17,412 --> 00:49:19,414 Thank you so much, John. 835 00:49:19,456 --> 00:49:21,416 We'll see you later. 836 00:49:21,625 --> 00:49:22,041 Love you 837 00:49:22,042 --> 00:49:24,044 husband. 838 00:49:25,671 --> 00:49:27,673 I love you, too, husband. 839 00:49:34,012 --> 00:49:36,014 He can't even stay for your wedding day. 840 00:49:36,974 --> 00:49:38,976 We already talked about it earlier. 841 00:49:39,101 --> 00:49:40,310 We see each other every day. 842 00:49:41,311 --> 00:49:42,228 He just 843 00:49:42,229 --> 00:49:44,231 needs to be there and make sure everything runs smooth. 844 00:49:44,815 --> 00:49:46,190 Sounds like a bad 845 00:49:46,191 --> 00:49:48,235 start to your marriage, to me. 846 00:49:49,903 --> 00:49:50,277 You know, 847 00:49:50,278 --> 00:49:52,614 I think I'll make a quick peach cobbler. 848 00:49:52,656 --> 00:49:53,948 Do you have any canned peaches? 849 00:49:53,949 --> 00:49:56,702 Michael? Yes, mom. 850 00:49:57,285 --> 00:49:58,661 I'll get some from the garage. 851 00:49:58,662 --> 00:50:00,664 Thank you. 852 00:50:07,421 --> 00:50:09,423 That was just rude. 853 00:50:10,298 --> 00:50:12,551 Your cousin is always trying to be your friend, 854 00:50:12,801 --> 00:50:14,677 and you can't even be nice to him 855 00:50:14,678 --> 00:50:16,680 for one day. 856 00:50:20,892 --> 00:50:22,894 Doesn't Michael have a ghost? 857 00:50:23,437 --> 00:50:25,312 He sure does. 858 00:50:25,313 --> 00:50:27,566 I stayed over one week when I hurt my leg. 859 00:50:28,692 --> 00:50:30,276 The noises I heard in the middle of 860 00:50:30,277 --> 00:50:32,279 the night were enough to send me home. 861 00:50:32,446 --> 00:50:34,406 No more staying over here for me. 862 00:50:36,783 --> 00:50:39,703 Aunt Joan was telling us about your ghosts. 863 00:50:40,871 --> 00:50:42,496 Oh. It's harmless. 864 00:50:42,497 --> 00:50:44,833 Just likes to cause a little mischief sometimes. 865 00:50:45,417 --> 00:50:48,045 I don't think you should have that carefree attitude, Michael. 866 00:50:48,795 --> 00:50:51,089 Satan presents himself in many ways. 867 00:50:51,506 --> 00:50:53,508 It's not Satan, mom. 868 00:50:53,717 --> 00:50:55,718 Satan is just a myth. 869 00:50:55,719 --> 00:50:57,721 Like the old man in the sky judging us. 870 00:50:57,888 --> 00:50:59,890 He most certainly is real. 871 00:51:01,558 --> 00:51:01,849 If the 872 00:51:01,850 --> 00:51:04,478 sins of man were forgiven by Jesus being killed, 873 00:51:05,187 --> 00:51:06,604 what happened to the sins of man 874 00:51:06,605 --> 00:51:08,607 before Jesus was killed? 875 00:51:08,815 --> 00:51:10,483 Did we go to hell?! 876 00:51:10,484 --> 00:51:11,734 Would a loving God send us 877 00:51:11,735 --> 00:51:13,737 from a perfect Paradise 878 00:51:14,071 --> 00:51:16,530 just to test us on earth and punish us 879 00:51:16,531 --> 00:51:18,533 if we fail? 880 00:51:18,658 --> 00:51:20,076 It's a grand lie. 881 00:51:20,077 --> 00:51:22,079 It's not real. 882 00:51:22,287 --> 00:51:24,790 We're all entitled to our opinions. 883 00:51:26,500 --> 00:51:29,085 Aunt Joan, do you really believe 884 00:51:29,086 --> 00:51:32,506 that your brother was punished by a religious god and sent to hell, 885 00:51:32,547 --> 00:51:35,050 just by being depressed and taking his own life? 886 00:51:40,222 --> 00:51:42,224 He was only 14. 887 00:51:46,269 --> 00:51:48,271 When I was little, 888 00:51:48,855 --> 00:51:51,315 my Pentecostal dad told me that my dog wouldn't 889 00:51:51,316 --> 00:51:54,401 go to heaven because heaven 890 00:51:54,402 --> 00:51:56,404 is just for humans 891 00:51:56,947 --> 00:51:57,947 Do you have any idea what that does to a child’s mind? 892 00:51:57,948 --> 00:51:59,950 what that does to a child's mind. 893 00:52:00,992 --> 00:52:02,202 I cried for a month. 894 00:52:03,411 --> 00:52:05,413 Well, fuck that! 895 00:52:05,997 --> 00:52:07,790 I wasn't going to have a thing to do with religion 896 00:52:07,791 --> 00:52:09,793 from that moment on. 897 00:52:10,919 --> 00:52:12,921 I'm sorry Aunt Joan. 898 00:52:13,296 --> 00:52:15,298 I didn't mean to upset you. 899 00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:18,134 It's just... 900 00:52:18,135 --> 00:52:20,095 well... 901 00:52:20,679 --> 00:52:22,681 Your brother was struggling, 902 00:52:23,765 --> 00:52:25,641 and he deserves compassion, 903 00:52:25,642 --> 00:52:27,644 not condemnation. 904 00:52:29,604 --> 00:52:31,272 Well, good luck with your marriage. 905 00:52:31,273 --> 00:52:33,275 A large age gap like that... 906 00:52:33,400 --> 00:52:35,276 It's not really good for a couple. 907 00:52:35,277 --> 00:52:37,279 Oh. That's ridiculous. 908 00:52:37,362 --> 00:52:40,448 His father and I were 16 years apart, and we were in love 909 00:52:40,657 --> 00:52:42,659 our entire marriage. 910 00:52:44,828 --> 00:52:46,830 I'm going to get some sugar from the garage. 911 00:52:47,205 --> 00:52:49,207 Okay. 912 00:52:54,880 --> 00:52:56,046 I'm just saying, 913 00:52:56,047 --> 00:52:57,756 two men living 914 00:52:57,757 --> 00:53:00,343 in a nontraditional relationship... 915 00:53:00,927 --> 00:53:01,802 Nontraditional 916 00:53:01,803 --> 00:53:03,429 My foot! 917 00:53:03,430 --> 00:53:05,682 The only reason they call it nontraditional 918 00:53:06,016 --> 00:53:08,017 is because those people 919 00:53:08,018 --> 00:53:10,020 have the upper hand in society. 920 00:53:10,520 --> 00:53:12,522 They decide the rules for everyone. 921 00:53:13,064 --> 00:53:15,566 Gay men and women have been treated less than human. 922 00:53:15,567 --> 00:53:17,986 And they've been here since day one. 923 00:53:19,237 --> 00:53:21,239 How long can it last? 924 00:53:21,281 --> 00:53:23,115 Hoping his little story 925 00:53:23,116 --> 00:53:25,327 books are gonna make him famous, 926 00:53:26,203 --> 00:53:28,954 and thinking he can be in a relationship 927 00:53:28,955 --> 00:53:32,626 with some big city guy with a successful career. 928 00:53:33,376 --> 00:53:34,335 Shut up, 929 00:53:34,336 --> 00:53:35,794 Wyatt. 930 00:53:35,795 --> 00:53:37,797 Don't you ever say that to him. 931 00:53:38,924 --> 00:53:40,841 He's my child, and I want him 932 00:53:40,842 --> 00:53:42,968 to have every chance at happiness 933 00:53:42,969 --> 00:53:44,971 that his father and I did. 934 00:53:46,556 --> 00:53:49,142 I wish your uncle were here to handle you. 935 00:53:54,481 --> 00:53:56,483 Is there any pie? 936 00:54:05,617 --> 00:54:07,619 (TV Movie) That you. 937 00:54:18,588 --> 00:54:21,215 Steve Winters here with another weather update. 938 00:54:21,216 --> 00:54:22,216 We're entering week 939 00:54:22,217 --> 00:54:26,137 three of what I'm officially calling the Great Atmosphere Standoff. 940 00:54:26,429 --> 00:54:28,597 We’re looking at sustained rain and gusts 941 00:54:28,598 --> 00:54:31,351 up to 40mph for the next fortnight. 942 00:54:31,601 --> 00:54:34,436 The temperature remains in the low 40s 943 00:54:34,437 --> 00:54:36,146 in what I’m calling 944 00:54:36,147 --> 00:54:38,941 a Meteorological purgatory. Too warm 945 00:54:38,942 --> 00:54:41,653 for snow angels, to cold for actual angels. 946 00:54:42,237 --> 00:54:45,699 For more of the latest weather, join us 11 on KFNN news channel. 947 00:54:48,660 --> 00:54:50,954 Let that light of God's love shine! 948 00:54:51,955 --> 00:54:55,083 Through your heart’s today. 949 00:54:55,125 --> 00:54:58,837 Let the holy spirit 950 00:54:59,587 --> 00:55:01,505 come on in to your heart. 951 00:55:01,506 --> 00:55:03,508 Shut up! 952 00:55:27,949 --> 00:55:29,867 (cellphone ringing) Hello. 953 00:55:29,868 --> 00:55:31,535 Hi, husband. 954 00:55:31,536 --> 00:55:33,580 I'm on my way in about 20 minutes. 955 00:55:33,788 --> 00:55:36,207 We’ll stay up and have our wedding night. 956 00:55:38,335 --> 00:55:38,584 Yeah, 957 00:55:38,585 --> 00:55:40,587 sounds wonderful. 958 00:55:41,379 --> 00:55:43,381 Sweetheart? 959 00:55:44,341 --> 00:55:46,343 Michael? 960 00:55:46,426 --> 00:55:48,428 What's wrong? 961 00:55:50,180 --> 00:55:52,182 Are you crying? 962 00:55:53,641 --> 00:55:55,643 Oh, honey, 963 00:55:56,394 --> 00:55:58,480 I messed up not being there with you tonight. 964 00:55:58,605 --> 00:56:01,399 I, -I'm so sorry. I... 965 00:56:03,985 --> 00:56:06,154 It's... just the rain. 966 00:56:06,196 --> 00:56:08,406 It gets depressing sometimes. 967 00:56:10,492 --> 00:56:10,824 And I also 968 00:56:10,825 --> 00:56:12,994 had a little too much to drink. 969 00:56:15,205 --> 00:56:16,455 Okay... (frantic) 970 00:56:16,456 --> 00:56:18,207 You know, I'm leaving right now. Okay. 971 00:56:18,208 --> 00:56:20,210 I don't want you to be upset, okay? 972 00:56:20,293 --> 00:56:22,461 Just make some coffee and I'll be home 973 00:56:22,462 --> 00:56:24,464 soon, okay? 974 00:56:25,048 --> 00:56:27,050 I’m sorry. 975 00:56:28,134 --> 00:56:30,136 I know I'm not good enough for you. 976 00:56:32,889 --> 00:56:33,723 I love you. 977 00:56:38,144 --> 00:56:40,146 Michael? 978 00:56:42,065 --> 00:56:44,067 Mike. 979 00:56:45,110 --> 00:56:47,112 Hello? 980 00:56:47,654 --> 00:56:49,656 Michael?! 981 00:56:52,617 --> 00:56:54,619 Michael? 982 00:57:04,796 --> 00:57:06,798 Michael? 983 00:58:31,216 --> 00:58:33,218 Sorry. 984 00:58:41,643 --> 00:58:43,645 It’s all right. I love you. 985 00:59:02,247 --> 00:59:04,249 It's so good to see you. 986 00:59:04,916 --> 00:59:07,417 You know, I got to say, I'm 987 00:59:07,418 --> 00:59:10,255 so sorry that I didn't make it after the wedding, 988 00:59:11,089 --> 00:59:13,508 but I was really not feeling well. 989 00:59:13,800 --> 00:59:15,259 Well, I completely understand. 990 00:59:15,260 --> 00:59:16,635 I'm just glad you could be here. 991 00:59:16,636 --> 00:59:18,596 Are you feeling better? 992 00:59:19,389 --> 00:59:20,889 Jesus loves me. Yes. 993 00:59:20,890 --> 00:59:22,516 Fit as a fiddle! Yes! 994 00:59:22,517 --> 00:59:24,309 Oh, yes. 995 00:59:24,310 --> 00:59:25,686 Oh, I hope it wasn't 996 00:59:25,687 --> 00:59:27,689 too long of a drive for you, though. 997 00:59:29,315 --> 00:59:32,485 Oh, I have something for you. 998 00:59:33,945 --> 00:59:35,487 Oh...--There you go. 999 00:59:35,488 --> 00:59:37,406 You didn't have to do this. 1000 00:59:37,407 --> 00:59:40,785 You know, I got home, and I looked inside the pocket, 1001 00:59:41,411 --> 00:59:43,413 and there, here was... 1002 00:59:43,746 --> 00:59:46,290 the wedding gift was right there inside. 1003 00:59:46,291 --> 00:59:48,626 And I only wear this for special occasions. 1004 00:59:50,253 --> 00:59:52,589 Happily Ever Laughter. 1005 00:59:56,217 --> 01:00:00,013 Wishing you a lifetime of fun and love. 1006 01:00:00,847 --> 01:00:02,557 That's very sweet. Thank you. 1007 01:00:05,226 --> 01:00:10,690 Oh. Uncle Jim, 1008 01:00:11,190 --> 01:00:13,192 I don't understand. 1009 01:00:14,402 --> 01:00:16,821 Is’for your future, for you and James? 1010 01:00:17,488 --> 01:00:19,490 Oh, Uncle Jim... wha... 1011 01:00:19,741 --> 01:00:21,743 what would we do with this? 1012 01:00:22,452 --> 01:00:23,827 This is very generous. 1013 01:00:23,828 --> 01:00:27,665 I don't know if I can accept this. Michael... 1014 01:00:28,666 --> 01:00:30,668 You're my only nephew. 1015 01:00:31,085 --> 01:00:33,087 And where in the world am I going to spend it? 1016 01:00:34,047 --> 01:00:36,006 This is just too much. 1017 01:00:36,007 --> 01:00:38,009 I saved it for years. 1018 01:00:39,469 --> 01:00:41,470 There's nothing I need. 1019 01:00:41,471 --> 01:00:43,473 I'm not an adventurous guy. 1020 01:00:44,682 --> 01:00:46,684 I don't travel. 1021 01:00:46,851 --> 01:00:49,395 I don't have any kids or a husband. 1022 01:00:50,980 --> 01:00:53,358 All I do is stay at home and watch jeopardy! 1023 01:00:55,568 --> 01:00:55,817 You know, 1024 01:00:55,818 --> 01:00:59,197 I had great memories of those times coming over and watching it. 1025 01:00:59,405 --> 01:01:01,865 And those TV dinners with aluminum. 1026 01:01:01,866 --> 01:01:03,033 The aluminum foil, 1027 01:01:03,034 --> 01:01:04,951 45 minutes to heaven. 1028 01:01:04,952 --> 01:01:05,702 Oh, yeah. 1029 01:01:05,703 --> 01:01:07,705 And you get to the apple pudding, 1030 01:01:07,789 --> 01:01:09,832 and by God, by that time, 1031 01:01:10,124 --> 01:01:12,460 you've already got into the Wheel of Fortune. 1032 01:01:14,045 --> 01:01:14,961 Oh, I 1033 01:01:14,962 --> 01:01:17,840 only have such happy memories of those times. 1034 01:01:18,216 --> 01:01:20,967 Certainly made up for those really ugly, awful ones 1035 01:01:20,968 --> 01:01:23,513 that I wanted to forget. 1036 01:01:26,140 --> 01:01:26,890 You know, 1037 01:01:26,891 --> 01:01:29,352 I remember a young man 1038 01:01:29,894 --> 01:01:32,063 with tears rolling down his cheeks 1039 01:01:33,398 --> 01:01:35,400 over a neighborhood boy 1040 01:01:35,692 --> 01:01:37,609 that knocked on your door. 1041 01:01:37,610 --> 01:01:39,612 Oh yes, Jeff Fox. 1042 01:01:40,446 --> 01:01:42,448 I never forgot that name. 1043 01:01:42,740 --> 01:01:44,742 Called me a homo. 1044 01:01:44,784 --> 01:01:46,702 All the kids at school laughing at me 1045 01:01:46,703 --> 01:01:48,704 and picking on me. 1046 01:01:48,705 --> 01:01:50,622 But then I came over 1047 01:01:50,623 --> 01:01:52,625 and you just reminded me 1048 01:01:52,875 --> 01:01:54,334 to not listen to them. 1049 01:01:54,335 --> 01:01:56,421 To be true to who I was. 1050 01:01:58,089 --> 01:02:00,091 You reminded me of that. 1051 01:02:01,342 --> 01:02:06,347 This... is really generous of you. 1052 01:02:07,390 --> 01:02:08,348 I just... 1053 01:02:08,349 --> 01:02:10,351 I can't take it. 1054 01:02:10,935 --> 01:02:12,895 Michael... 1055 01:02:14,355 --> 01:02:16,566 You're starting a new chapter in your life 1056 01:02:17,775 --> 01:02:19,651 with James... 1057 01:02:19,652 --> 01:02:22,280 and you're going to have a beautiful life together. 1058 01:02:23,656 --> 01:02:25,616 You know? 1059 01:02:26,409 --> 01:02:28,411 I lived in a different past. 1060 01:02:30,246 --> 01:02:31,204 I was brought up 1061 01:02:31,205 --> 01:02:34,250 with all that gay prejudicy, of... 1062 01:02:34,417 --> 01:02:36,419 “oh, there's those kinds.” 1063 01:02:36,711 --> 01:02:38,211 You know, like we were sinners. 1064 01:02:38,212 --> 01:02:40,214 Changing the fabric of America. 1065 01:02:41,257 --> 01:02:44,051 It was hard... as a young gay kid. 1066 01:02:47,346 --> 01:02:49,348 I did my chores on the farm. 1067 01:02:50,808 --> 01:02:53,311 I went to school, attended church. 1068 01:02:54,979 --> 01:02:56,563 But, I'm so proud, 1069 01:02:56,564 --> 01:02:59,609 that you found your soulmate, James. 1070 01:03:00,735 --> 01:03:02,695 You know, I never had a husband... 1071 01:03:03,404 --> 01:03:04,404 or a boyfriend. 1072 01:03:04,405 --> 01:03:06,156 What? Yeah. 1073 01:03:06,157 --> 01:03:08,159 I took care of our relatives. 1074 01:03:09,035 --> 01:03:11,037 I watched them date, 1075 01:03:11,120 --> 01:03:13,289 get married, have kids, 1076 01:03:15,082 --> 01:03:16,541 and then I thought, oh, I'm 1077 01:03:16,542 --> 01:03:18,544 going to be the new Superman. 1078 01:03:18,795 --> 01:03:20,797 I'm going to be normal. 1079 01:03:21,923 --> 01:03:24,509 But what happened was... I grew old. 1080 01:03:25,092 --> 01:03:27,010 I'm still alone. 1081 01:03:27,011 --> 01:03:29,013 And I'm still thinking... 1082 01:03:29,764 --> 01:03:31,766 he's watching. 1083 01:03:35,311 --> 01:03:36,437 And then it happened. 1084 01:03:38,564 --> 01:03:40,566 One summer day. 1085 01:03:42,068 --> 01:03:43,151 There he stood. 1086 01:03:43,152 --> 01:03:45,196 A sweet man in a cornfield. 1087 01:03:48,449 --> 01:03:50,451 And we had a great conversation. 1088 01:03:52,078 --> 01:03:54,080 Talked about irrigation. 1089 01:03:54,664 --> 01:03:56,081 And I didn't know the irrigation 1090 01:03:56,082 --> 01:03:58,251 was going to get me to the movies, 1091 01:03:58,626 --> 01:04:01,003 a theater and the county fairs. 1092 01:04:01,754 --> 01:04:03,756 But it did. 1093 01:04:05,883 --> 01:04:07,885 And then it got to me. 1094 01:04:10,888 --> 01:04:14,642 I thought and knew that he wanted more. 1095 01:04:17,353 --> 01:04:19,355 And of course, I got scared. 1096 01:04:23,234 --> 01:04:25,236 I sent him away. 1097 01:04:29,949 --> 01:04:31,951 Michael... 1098 01:04:32,410 --> 01:04:34,412 I'm not a well man. 1099 01:04:35,830 --> 01:04:37,832 I have bladder cancer. 1100 01:04:38,583 --> 01:04:40,585 What? 1101 01:04:40,918 --> 01:04:42,544 I'm okay. 1102 01:04:42,545 --> 01:04:44,004 I got enough to get by 1103 01:04:44,005 --> 01:04:46,048 with Social Security and savings. 1104 01:04:47,842 --> 01:04:50,386 He gave me two years... maybe less. 1105 01:04:53,389 --> 01:04:56,517 But I want you and James 1106 01:04:57,310 --> 01:04:59,312 to get that house 1107 01:04:59,437 --> 01:05:01,439 that you've always talked about. 1108 01:05:03,399 --> 01:05:05,401 It’ll make a great down payment. 1109 01:05:05,818 --> 01:05:07,820 I’m, so sorry. 1110 01:05:08,154 --> 01:05:09,821 Don't be. 1111 01:05:09,822 --> 01:05:11,616 God works in strange ways. 1112 01:05:13,367 --> 01:05:15,870 You never know why things happen. 1113 01:05:17,079 --> 01:05:19,081 But there's always a reason. 1114 01:05:22,752 --> 01:05:24,252 I've learned one thing. 1115 01:05:24,253 --> 01:05:26,255 Life is short. 1116 01:05:27,423 --> 01:05:29,592 And don't take anything seriously. 1117 01:05:37,099 --> 01:05:39,101 Now there's something I have to tell you. 1118 01:06:03,000 --> 01:06:05,002 Hi, sunshine. 1119 01:06:07,421 --> 01:06:09,297 Farmer's Almanac says it looks like 1120 01:06:09,298 --> 01:06:12,009 we're going to have a few big storms between 1121 01:06:12,385 --> 01:06:14,387 December and February. 1122 01:06:15,930 --> 01:06:16,388 I'm sorry. 1123 01:06:16,389 --> 01:06:18,391 I'm missed seeing your uncle. 1124 01:06:21,102 --> 01:06:21,393 Yeah, 1125 01:06:21,394 --> 01:06:23,562 he was the only one I could ever talk to when I was young. 1126 01:06:25,815 --> 01:06:27,524 Gave us a wedding gift. 1127 01:06:27,525 --> 01:06:29,527 Oh. How sweet. 1128 01:06:29,819 --> 01:06:31,319 Was it, uh... 1129 01:06:31,320 --> 01:06:33,489 chocolates or flavored coffee by chance? 1130 01:06:34,448 --> 01:06:36,450 He wrote us a check. 1131 01:06:37,243 --> 01:06:39,245 To help buy a house. 1132 01:06:39,662 --> 01:06:41,664 Oh, wow. 1133 01:06:41,831 --> 01:06:43,833 What a sweet guy. 1134 01:06:45,126 --> 01:06:47,920 Maybe one day we'll have enough saved. 1135 01:06:50,923 --> 01:06:54,176 He gave us $18,000 1136 01:06:55,428 --> 01:06:56,469 for a down payment. 1137 01:06:56,470 --> 01:06:57,971 Oh my God! 1138 01:06:57,972 --> 01:07:00,765 Bu... that's just, wild. 1139 01:07:00,766 --> 01:07:02,768 Really?! 1140 01:07:04,228 --> 01:07:05,896 Okay, I have to call him. 1141 01:07:08,149 --> 01:07:09,149 Oh, hey... 1142 01:07:09,150 --> 01:07:10,900 and guess what? 1143 01:07:10,901 --> 01:07:12,903 It looks like... 1144 01:07:13,154 --> 01:07:15,156 I'm going to be working more from home 1145 01:07:15,239 --> 01:07:17,241 as soon as I work out the details. 1146 01:07:17,950 --> 01:07:19,952 Isn't that great? 1147 01:07:26,625 --> 01:07:28,627 You okay, sweetheart? 1148 01:07:34,091 --> 01:07:36,093 What's wrong? 1149 01:07:38,054 --> 01:07:40,056 Michael... 1150 01:07:43,059 --> 01:07:43,725 Well, did I do 1151 01:07:43,726 --> 01:07:45,728 something? 1152 01:07:45,936 --> 01:07:47,562 Did I forget something? 1153 01:07:47,563 --> 01:07:50,106 No... no. 1154 01:07:50,107 --> 01:07:52,109 You're great. 1155 01:07:54,195 --> 01:07:56,197 You know how sometimes... 1156 01:07:58,032 --> 01:08:00,034 I don't always seem like myself. 1157 01:08:01,494 --> 01:08:02,911 I’m... 1158 01:08:02,912 --> 01:08:04,914 forgettign things, alright... 1159 01:08:05,998 --> 01:08:08,166 I get frustrated suddenly 1160 01:08:08,167 --> 01:08:11,045 or confused. I'm... 1161 01:08:13,464 --> 01:08:15,466 You take those allergy pills. 1162 01:08:16,592 --> 01:08:17,759 I know, they give you brain fog 1163 01:08:17,760 --> 01:08:19,762 sometimes. 1164 01:08:24,433 --> 01:08:24,974 I have 1165 01:08:24,975 --> 01:08:28,771 something, called early onset Alzheimer's. 1166 01:08:32,983 --> 01:08:34,985 What? 1167 01:08:35,444 --> 01:08:38,154 It affects people under 65, 1168 01:08:38,155 --> 01:08:41,534 but most commonly between 40 and 50. 1169 01:08:42,326 --> 01:08:44,328 It's very rare. 1170 01:08:46,539 --> 01:08:49,375 And, uh... 1171 01:08:50,960 --> 01:08:52,962 there’s no cure. 1172 01:08:54,588 --> 01:08:57,591 And I've known for the past three weeks, 1173 01:08:58,509 --> 01:09:00,511 and I didn't know how to tell you. 1174 01:09:02,721 --> 01:09:03,514 I know... 1175 01:09:04,557 --> 01:09:06,015 I know this is a terrible 1176 01:09:06,016 --> 01:09:08,018 way to start a marriage. 1177 01:09:09,186 --> 01:09:11,188 And I love you. 1178 01:09:11,897 --> 01:09:14,316 I love you with all of my heart. 1179 01:09:16,402 --> 01:09:18,404 And I won't blame you... 1180 01:09:19,530 --> 01:09:21,532 I mean, you if you want out. 1181 01:09:23,075 --> 01:09:25,077 I'm so sorry. 1182 01:09:57,526 --> 01:09:59,486 Open your eyes, Michael. 1183 01:10:00,613 --> 01:10:03,657 Tonight we're going to explore the elements. 1184 01:10:04,033 --> 01:10:06,035 Earth, air, fire, water. 1185 01:10:06,285 --> 01:10:07,785 They're all around us. 1186 01:10:07,786 --> 01:10:09,788 And within us. 1187 01:10:12,291 --> 01:10:14,293 What's on your mind, Michael? 1188 01:10:16,629 --> 01:10:18,631 I've been thinking about James. 1189 01:10:20,466 --> 01:10:22,468 I'm scared of leaving him, but I'm... 1190 01:10:23,677 --> 01:10:25,930 I'm scared of him seeing me deteriorate. 1191 01:10:27,014 --> 01:10:29,016 That fear comes from love. 1192 01:10:29,475 --> 01:10:32,144 It's a powerful force. 1193 01:10:34,480 --> 01:10:37,149 Water teaches us to flow, 1194 01:10:37,816 --> 01:10:39,777 to adapt. 1195 01:10:40,486 --> 01:10:42,446 Create a ripple. 1196 01:10:48,369 --> 01:10:50,370 I'm so afraid of the changes, 1197 01:10:50,371 --> 01:10:52,373 I'm going to be going through. 1198 01:10:52,665 --> 01:10:54,667 My relationship... 1199 01:10:54,792 --> 01:10:56,794 with James... 1200 01:10:57,127 --> 01:10:58,920 will change. 1201 01:10:58,921 --> 01:11:00,714 I'm not going to be the man he knew. 1202 01:11:04,051 --> 01:11:06,053 Change isn't always loss, Michael. 1203 01:11:06,887 --> 01:11:08,346 Even if you do, change 1204 01:11:08,347 --> 01:11:10,557 can also be about transformation. 1205 01:11:12,434 --> 01:11:14,435 How do I make the most of the time 1206 01:11:14,436 --> 01:11:16,438 I have left with him? 1207 01:11:18,607 --> 01:11:20,609 By being present. 1208 01:11:21,026 --> 01:11:22,318 Fully present. 1209 01:11:22,319 --> 01:11:23,528 Quality over quantity, 1210 01:11:23,529 --> 01:11:25,531 Michael. 1211 01:11:30,411 --> 01:11:32,413 Close your eyes. 1212 01:11:34,206 --> 01:11:36,208 Listen to the beat. 1213 01:11:40,379 --> 01:11:42,381 Let it become your heartbeat. 1214 01:11:43,882 --> 01:11:45,884 James's heartbeat. 1215 01:11:46,927 --> 01:11:47,468 Now see 1216 01:11:47,469 --> 01:11:49,387 James. 1217 01:11:49,388 --> 01:11:51,390 Not as the man he is now, 1218 01:11:52,266 --> 01:11:54,268 but as the man he'll become. 1219 01:11:55,185 --> 01:11:57,146 Strong, compassionate. 1220 01:11:58,230 --> 01:12:00,941 Carrying your love with him everywhere he goes. 1221 01:12:01,483 --> 01:12:03,485 I can see him. 1222 01:12:03,819 --> 01:12:05,821 He's so beautiful. 1223 01:12:10,326 --> 01:12:12,076 That vision... 1224 01:12:12,077 --> 01:12:13,411 that love. 1225 01:12:13,412 --> 01:12:14,871 It transcends time, 1226 01:12:14,872 --> 01:12:16,874 Michael. 1227 01:12:17,249 --> 01:12:18,666 That's the fire element. 1228 01:12:18,667 --> 01:12:20,293 Passion. Transformation. 1229 01:12:20,294 --> 01:12:23,505 The spark of the divine in all of us. Yes. 1230 01:12:24,214 --> 01:12:25,882 I want to 1231 01:12:25,883 --> 01:12:27,759 I want to write to him. 1232 01:12:27,760 --> 01:12:28,801 I want to, 1233 01:12:28,802 --> 01:12:31,930 I want to write something that's going to help him 1234 01:12:32,264 --> 01:12:34,057 through the difficult times. 1235 01:12:34,058 --> 01:12:37,478 To give him strength, to remind him of our story. 1236 01:12:38,479 --> 01:12:39,854 An excellent idea. 1237 01:12:39,855 --> 01:12:41,815 Where it's a powerful medicine. 1238 01:12:45,110 --> 01:12:46,778 And this, 1239 01:12:46,779 --> 01:12:48,781 represents Earth. 1240 01:12:48,947 --> 01:12:50,949 Grounding, stability. 1241 01:12:51,241 --> 01:12:53,786 It's the physical world we inhabit, for now. 1242 01:12:56,455 --> 01:12:58,749 I'm still afraid of forgetting, 1243 01:13:00,125 --> 01:13:02,127 of being forgotten. 1244 01:13:03,837 --> 01:13:05,839 Listen to me, Michael. 1245 01:13:06,507 --> 01:13:09,301 You are more than your thoughts 1246 01:13:09,760 --> 01:13:11,762 and your memories. 1247 01:13:11,887 --> 01:13:14,681 You are more than this body, this mind. 1248 01:13:15,849 --> 01:13:17,976 You are a spark of the infinite... 1249 01:13:18,352 --> 01:13:20,854 having a human experience. 1250 01:13:23,148 --> 01:13:24,899 Your impact on this world, 1251 01:13:24,900 --> 01:13:26,902 on James. On those you love. 1252 01:13:27,277 --> 01:13:28,736 That doesn't end. 1253 01:13:28,737 --> 01:13:31,198 It ripples outward, touching lives. 1254 01:13:31,698 --> 01:13:33,700 You'll never even know. 1255 01:13:37,121 --> 01:13:38,830 Promise me something. 1256 01:13:38,831 --> 01:13:40,833 Promise me that every day 1257 01:13:41,375 --> 01:13:42,875 you and James will share a minute 1258 01:13:42,876 --> 01:13:45,003 of pure joy together. 1259 01:13:45,587 --> 01:13:47,213 One moment where you're both fully 1260 01:13:47,214 --> 01:13:49,216 alive, fully present. 1261 01:13:49,425 --> 01:13:51,468 Don't be afraid to say I love you. 1262 01:13:51,552 --> 01:13:53,554 Gvgeyu 1263 01:13:54,304 --> 01:13:55,931 That's how we say it in Cherokee. 1264 01:13:57,558 --> 01:13:59,560 Gvgeyu. -Gvgeyu 1265 01:14:01,937 --> 01:14:03,062 Remember, Michael, 1266 01:14:03,063 --> 01:14:04,814 Every moment is precious. 1267 01:14:04,815 --> 01:14:06,190 This journey you're on. 1268 01:14:06,191 --> 01:14:10,863 It's not about ending, but, about transformation. 1269 01:14:12,489 --> 01:14:14,491 What do you mean by transformation? 1270 01:14:16,201 --> 01:14:18,203 Nothing really ends, Michael. 1271 01:14:19,246 --> 01:14:21,206 We never truly die, Michael. 1272 01:14:21,582 --> 01:14:23,082 We transition. 1273 01:14:23,083 --> 01:14:25,752 Our earthly consciousness simply transitions 1274 01:14:26,086 --> 01:14:28,046 from one state of being to another. 1275 01:14:28,755 --> 01:14:30,716 You mean like an afterlife? 1276 01:14:32,134 --> 01:14:33,759 Yes, but 1277 01:14:33,760 --> 01:14:35,846 it's not some distant, far off place. 1278 01:14:36,346 --> 01:14:38,014 It's a continuation of our journey 1279 01:14:38,015 --> 01:14:40,017 here on Earth. 1280 01:14:40,058 --> 01:14:42,060 What's it like? 1281 01:14:43,228 --> 01:14:45,230 It's a place of peace. 1282 01:14:46,982 --> 01:14:48,316 And renewal. 1283 01:14:48,317 --> 01:14:50,193 Imagine feeling like you're in your 30s again, 1284 01:14:50,194 --> 01:14:52,196 but without all the pain and sickness. 1285 01:14:53,405 --> 01:14:54,989 It’s earth as we know it. 1286 01:14:54,990 --> 01:14:57,701 But in its most perfect state, 1287 01:14:58,994 --> 01:15:00,996 Beauty and love. 1288 01:15:03,582 --> 01:15:05,626 But. But what about James? 1289 01:15:06,793 --> 01:15:09,213 What about the people we leave behind? 1290 01:15:09,463 --> 01:15:11,173 Your love for them doesn't end, Michael. 1291 01:15:12,716 --> 01:15:14,675 In fact, many believe, 1292 01:15:14,676 --> 01:15:16,302 we can visit them, 1293 01:15:16,303 --> 01:15:18,012 send the messages of love 1294 01:15:18,013 --> 01:15:20,348 and comfort. And one day, 1295 01:15:20,349 --> 01:15:22,351 you'll be reunited. 1296 01:15:23,977 --> 01:15:26,855 It sounds less like an ending. 1297 01:15:28,065 --> 01:15:29,982 Because it isn't an ending. 1298 01:15:29,983 --> 01:15:31,985 It's a new beginning. 1299 01:15:32,528 --> 01:15:35,364 Your task now is to live more deeply, 1300 01:15:35,531 --> 01:15:37,533 to love more fully. 1301 01:15:40,035 --> 01:15:41,995 And you and James, 1302 01:15:42,663 --> 01:15:45,374 you're on this path... together. 1303 01:15:54,216 --> 01:15:56,218 We're all just... 1304 01:15:56,301 --> 01:15:58,303 walking each other home, my friend. 1305 01:16:02,349 --> 01:16:04,351 Thankyou. 1306 01:16:04,851 --> 01:16:06,853 You're most welcome. 1307 01:16:35,382 --> 01:16:36,799 Hey. Hey. 1308 01:16:36,800 --> 01:16:38,802 Ready for our walk? 1309 01:16:44,224 --> 01:16:46,268 You know what I was thinking? 1310 01:16:47,686 --> 01:16:49,312 Maybe we could start our Christmas 1311 01:16:49,313 --> 01:16:51,315 decorating this weekend. 1312 01:16:52,649 --> 01:16:53,941 Yeah. 1313 01:16:53,942 --> 01:16:55,944 Yeah, I could use a little Christmas. 1314 01:16:58,905 --> 01:17:00,907 Come on. -Hey... 1315 01:17:07,873 --> 01:17:09,875 If, um... 1316 01:17:11,001 --> 01:17:13,003 When the time comes... 1317 01:17:13,795 --> 01:17:15,797 and I'm not here... 1318 01:17:16,715 --> 01:17:18,717 I won't be dead. 1319 01:17:19,343 --> 01:17:21,345 I'll just be there 1320 01:17:22,220 --> 01:17:24,222 in all its beauty. 1321 01:17:24,848 --> 01:17:27,184 Our permanent home, as we can call it. 1322 01:17:29,478 --> 01:17:31,480 We'll be together again. 1323 01:17:35,817 --> 01:17:37,819 You're just gonna have to tough it out here... 1324 01:17:39,404 --> 01:17:41,406 and help me. 1325 01:17:55,170 --> 01:17:57,297 I know it seems like a long time, 1326 01:17:58,965 --> 01:18:01,635 but life goes by fast on this side. 1327 01:18:06,515 --> 01:18:09,601 Hey... hey... 1328 01:18:11,019 --> 01:18:12,436 What if we buy the old Munson 1329 01:18:12,437 --> 01:18:14,439 house down the street? 1330 01:18:15,607 --> 01:18:17,108 What? 1331 01:18:17,109 --> 01:18:19,111 It's got a great price. 1332 01:18:19,403 --> 01:18:21,405 And we've got the down payment. 1333 01:18:22,197 --> 01:18:24,199 If you feel the same. 1334 01:18:25,575 --> 01:18:27,536 If you want to. 1335 01:18:30,789 --> 01:18:32,248 Yes. -Yeah? 1336 01:18:32,249 --> 01:18:33,958 Yeah. Yes. 1337 01:18:33,959 --> 01:18:35,961 Yeah. 1338 01:18:39,756 --> 01:18:41,758 We're buying a house. 1339 01:18:42,008 --> 01:18:43,592 Yeah, we're buying a house. 1340 01:18:43,593 --> 01:18:45,595 We’re buying a house. (jazzy Christmas music) 1341 01:19:14,291 --> 01:19:16,293 Stu. Hi, James. 1342 01:19:16,626 --> 01:19:18,628 Time for a cookie and coffee? 1343 01:19:20,046 --> 01:19:22,048 Seems baking is the only thing keeps me sane 1344 01:19:22,340 --> 01:19:24,342 during the holidays. 1345 01:19:24,843 --> 01:19:26,845 Come on. 1346 01:19:29,681 --> 01:19:31,683 You know, the first Christmas was the hardest. 1347 01:19:31,808 --> 01:19:33,810 After Sarah died. 1348 01:19:34,811 --> 01:19:38,231 I would just sit. Sad. 1349 01:19:39,524 --> 01:19:41,275 Angry. 1350 01:19:41,276 --> 01:19:43,278 Confused. 1351 01:19:46,031 --> 01:19:48,033 How's Mike? 1352 01:19:49,785 --> 01:19:51,119 Good days and bad days. 1353 01:19:52,537 --> 01:19:54,539 Today was... 1354 01:19:55,582 --> 01:19:57,541 He couldn't 1355 01:19:57,542 --> 01:19:59,544 remember where we put the Christmas boxes. 1356 01:20:01,338 --> 01:20:03,340 It's progressing so fast. 1357 01:20:04,299 --> 01:20:06,301 And you? 1358 01:20:06,343 --> 01:20:08,345 How are you holding up? 1359 01:20:15,310 --> 01:20:17,312 I look at him, and... 1360 01:20:19,147 --> 01:20:21,817 I can already feel him struggling. 1361 01:20:24,778 --> 01:20:26,780 I just didn't think it would get so bad 1362 01:20:27,280 --> 01:20:29,282 so fast. 1363 01:20:31,034 --> 01:20:33,036 And I'm terrified, Stu. 1364 01:20:36,540 --> 01:20:38,542 I'm so scared. 1365 01:20:41,336 --> 01:20:41,502 You know, 1366 01:20:41,503 --> 01:20:43,922 Sarah told me, that there at the end... 1367 01:20:45,549 --> 01:20:47,634 don't you waste one moment 1368 01:20:48,593 --> 01:20:50,595 worrying about losing me. 1369 01:20:51,721 --> 01:20:53,723 Love me now. 1370 01:20:55,058 --> 01:20:55,933 Took me two years 1371 01:20:55,934 --> 01:20:57,936 to understand what she meant. 1372 01:21:03,733 --> 01:21:05,735 How do you... -Handle it? 1373 01:21:07,571 --> 01:21:09,446 You don't. 1374 01:21:09,447 --> 01:21:11,407 You just love harder 1375 01:21:11,408 --> 01:21:13,410 every single day. 1376 01:21:17,998 --> 01:21:19,248 You know, from the moment 1377 01:21:19,249 --> 01:21:21,251 we got that horrible phone call, 1378 01:21:22,419 --> 01:21:24,421 till she drew her last breath... 1379 01:21:25,005 --> 01:21:26,965 was six weeks. 1380 01:21:28,300 --> 01:21:30,302 You've got something we didn't. 1381 01:21:31,052 --> 01:21:32,845 Time. 1382 01:21:32,846 --> 01:21:34,848 Time to make more memories. 1383 01:21:35,640 --> 01:21:37,642 Time to hold him closer. 1384 01:21:42,606 --> 01:21:43,565 I just found him. 1385 01:21:44,983 --> 01:21:46,985 Now I'm going to lose him. 1386 01:21:48,486 --> 01:21:51,489 What if he forgets... about us? 1387 01:21:53,325 --> 01:21:55,327 Then you be his memory. 1388 01:21:55,869 --> 01:21:57,871 You be as anchor. 1389 01:21:57,913 --> 01:21:59,915 Just like you have been. 1390 01:22:01,833 --> 01:22:03,835 And... you've got us. 1391 01:22:04,461 --> 01:22:06,463 Your chosen family. 1392 01:22:06,546 --> 01:22:08,548 We're not going anywhere. 1393 01:22:10,467 --> 01:22:12,469 I just feel so alone. 1394 01:22:14,220 --> 01:22:15,971 Yeah. 1395 01:22:15,972 --> 01:22:17,974 Yeah, I know the feeling. 1396 01:22:18,099 --> 01:22:20,059 But you're not. 1397 01:22:20,060 --> 01:22:22,062 And neither is Michael. 1398 01:22:23,563 --> 01:22:25,565 Call me any time. 1399 01:22:26,816 --> 01:22:29,276 Even if it's just to sit in silence 1400 01:22:29,277 --> 01:22:31,279 and eat crappy cookies. 1401 01:22:33,198 --> 01:22:35,200 And James, 1402 01:22:35,533 --> 01:22:37,577 the greatest gift that you can give Michael 1403 01:22:38,954 --> 01:22:40,788 and yourself. 1404 01:22:40,789 --> 01:22:42,791 It's exactly what you're doing now. 1405 01:22:43,333 --> 01:22:45,335 Being here. 1406 01:22:52,926 --> 01:22:54,928 Let me finish this. 1407 01:23:00,225 --> 01:23:02,227 I want to surprise Michael. 1408 01:23:12,821 --> 01:23:14,823 We gather here, 1409 01:23:15,407 --> 01:23:17,409 blessed by this abundance 1410 01:23:18,368 --> 01:23:20,370 and each other's company. 1411 01:23:21,079 --> 01:23:23,081 We're grateful 1412 01:23:23,415 --> 01:23:26,167 for the love and strength of this family. 1413 01:23:28,253 --> 01:23:31,006 And for the spirit that guides us 1414 01:23:31,965 --> 01:23:35,301 through both joyous and challenging times. 1415 01:23:38,179 --> 01:23:40,181 May we have hope in our hearts. 1416 01:23:41,808 --> 01:23:44,102 And find peace 1417 01:23:44,936 --> 01:23:46,938 in our shared moments. 1418 01:23:48,440 --> 01:23:50,442 Let us be mindful 1419 01:23:51,401 --> 01:23:53,695 of all of life's blessings. 1420 01:23:55,238 --> 01:23:57,614 Amen. 1421 01:23:57,615 --> 01:23:58,615 All right. 1422 01:23:58,616 --> 01:23:59,366 Let's dig in. 1423 01:23:59,367 --> 01:24:01,369 I am starving. 1424 01:24:02,078 --> 01:24:04,330 You know, I used to cook such big meals. 1425 01:24:05,290 --> 01:24:07,292 Your father loved my cooking. 1426 01:24:07,876 --> 01:24:09,878 I would say to him let's go out to eat. 1427 01:24:10,295 --> 01:24:10,753 And he’d say 1428 01:24:10,754 --> 01:24:13,298 why go out when the best cooking is at home? 1429 01:24:13,965 --> 01:24:16,134 I think he just didn't want to spend the money. 1430 01:24:18,678 --> 01:24:20,680 He sure was crazy about you. 1431 01:24:22,515 --> 01:24:23,974 He used to tell me all the time 1432 01:24:23,975 --> 01:24:25,977 about how proud he was of you. 1433 01:24:28,063 --> 01:24:30,065 He only wanted you to be happy. 1434 01:24:31,900 --> 01:24:33,942 He didn't want us to put any expectations 1435 01:24:33,943 --> 01:24:35,945 on you. 1436 01:24:36,905 --> 01:24:38,031 But I'm afraid I did. 1437 01:24:48,083 --> 01:24:49,208 Did I tell you that your 1438 01:24:49,209 --> 01:24:51,211 father visits me quite often? 1439 01:24:53,880 --> 01:24:55,881 He comes to me when I'm sleeping. 1440 01:24:55,882 --> 01:24:57,884 It's as real to me as us sitting here. 1441 01:25:00,136 --> 01:25:02,097 What happens in the visit? 1442 01:25:03,098 --> 01:25:03,597 Oh, well, 1443 01:25:03,598 --> 01:25:05,767 like last week, I was lying in bed. 1444 01:25:06,309 --> 01:25:08,143 He was lying on his side of the bed, 1445 01:25:08,144 --> 01:25:10,146 talking to me like it used to be. 1446 01:25:11,356 --> 01:25:13,900 And then I wake up, and I am. 1447 01:25:14,901 --> 01:25:16,903 I feel so good for the rest of the day. 1448 01:25:19,030 --> 01:25:20,197 He tells me not to 1449 01:25:20,198 --> 01:25:22,200 fret or worry. 1450 01:25:22,367 --> 01:25:24,369 Says he's building our house. 1451 01:25:27,330 --> 01:25:29,332 What house? 1452 01:25:29,499 --> 01:25:32,000 When we first started dating, I told him about a house 1453 01:25:32,001 --> 01:25:34,003 I saw in an old Doris Day movie. 1454 01:25:34,087 --> 01:25:36,881 And he said that one day he was going to build it for me. 1455 01:25:39,384 --> 01:25:40,926 But with one thing or another, 1456 01:25:40,927 --> 01:25:42,928 we settled in another house, 1457 01:25:42,929 --> 01:25:44,931 raised a family and life went on. 1458 01:25:48,059 --> 01:25:50,061 From what he tells me... 1459 01:25:50,186 --> 01:25:51,603 anything that you want to do 1460 01:25:51,604 --> 01:25:53,606 or see in the afterlife, 1461 01:25:53,731 --> 01:25:55,733 you just have to think it. 1462 01:25:56,359 --> 01:25:57,985 You can walk down the street 1463 01:25:57,986 --> 01:26:00,738 in the springtime, in Paris in 1920. 1464 01:26:01,656 --> 01:26:04,033 Talk to all of the pets that you've ever loved. 1465 01:26:04,576 --> 01:26:06,536 They understand every word. 1466 01:26:09,414 --> 01:26:11,749 He says that he is not rushing it. 1467 01:26:12,417 --> 01:26:13,750 He says that he wants everything 1468 01:26:13,751 --> 01:26:15,753 to be perfect for when I get there. 1469 01:26:19,090 --> 01:26:20,716 Are you doing okay, sweetie? 1470 01:26:20,717 --> 01:26:21,967 Can I get you anything? 1471 01:26:21,968 --> 01:26:23,218 No, I'm doing good, mom, 1472 01:26:23,219 --> 01:26:27,223 thanks. 1473 01:26:31,186 --> 01:26:33,395 Merry Christmas. 1474 01:26:33,396 --> 01:26:34,188 Merry Christmas, 1475 01:26:34,189 --> 01:26:36,191 my boys. 1476 01:26:57,921 --> 01:26:59,923 How's it coming? 1477 01:27:01,090 --> 01:27:03,092 I'm excited to find out how it ends. 1478 01:27:03,676 --> 01:27:05,636 It's good, I think. 1479 01:27:05,637 --> 01:27:07,639 Of course it's good. 1480 01:27:10,099 --> 01:27:12,101 Do you want me to read you the last part? 1481 01:27:12,435 --> 01:27:15,188 No. I want to be surprised. 1482 01:27:17,857 --> 01:27:19,943 Hey, you know what? 1483 01:27:21,194 --> 01:27:23,196 What? 1484 01:27:24,656 --> 01:27:26,531 You're my everything. 1485 01:27:26,532 --> 01:27:28,534 I love you. 1486 01:27:40,713 --> 01:27:42,715 I'll let you get back to it. 1487 01:27:42,799 --> 01:27:45,635 I'll get back to heating leftovers. Oh. 1488 01:27:49,806 --> 01:27:54,852 Hey! Yeah. 1489 01:27:58,273 --> 01:28:00,275 How about you read me the last part? 1490 01:28:01,359 --> 01:28:03,361 Yeah. 1491 01:28:09,701 --> 01:28:11,703 As summer faded into autumn, 1492 01:28:12,120 --> 01:28:13,870 Samuel and John made a pact 1493 01:28:13,871 --> 01:28:15,873 under the harvest moon. 1494 01:28:16,666 --> 01:28:18,626 No matter what storms may come, 1495 01:28:19,544 --> 01:28:21,546 they would face them together. 1496 01:28:22,922 --> 01:28:24,924 Their love was a shelter. 1497 01:28:25,967 --> 01:28:28,303 A fortress built not of stone, 1498 01:28:29,679 --> 01:28:31,681 but of shared dreams, 1499 01:28:32,056 --> 01:28:34,017 Quiet understanding 1500 01:28:34,809 --> 01:28:36,811 and unwavering commitment. 1501 01:28:37,895 --> 01:28:40,440 In a world that sought to tear them apart, 1502 01:28:41,691 --> 01:28:44,484 Samuel and John had found something 1503 01:28:44,485 --> 01:28:46,821 rare and precious. 1504 01:28:48,948 --> 01:28:50,950 They had found home... 1505 01:28:51,784 --> 01:28:53,786 in each other's arms. 1506 01:28:58,333 --> 01:29:00,418 The end. 1507 01:29:19,979 --> 01:29:21,981 What happened to my lights?! 1508 01:29:26,277 --> 01:29:27,069 I've done it. 1509 01:29:27,070 --> 01:29:29,238 Yes you did. Well, I didn't mean to cut it. 1510 01:29:29,405 --> 01:29:30,489 You did it on purpose. 1511 01:29:30,490 --> 01:29:32,115 I did not do it on purpose. 1512 01:29:32,116 --> 01:29:35,619 You did too do it on purpose just because I stepped on your old 1513 01:29:35,620 --> 01:29:36,621 sad Santa. 1514 01:29:38,623 --> 01:29:39,081 Ah hah! Then you 1515 01:29:39,082 --> 01:29:41,084 stepped on him deliberately, huh? 1516 01:29:41,417 --> 01:29:43,210 And you cut my lights deliberately. 1517 01:29:43,211 --> 01:29:46,214 I did not do it deliberately! 1518 01:29:46,255 --> 01:29:48,215 Look Viv, if I want to ruin your tree, I could 1519 01:29:48,216 --> 01:29:50,218 cut it if I want to. 1520 01:29:51,594 --> 01:29:53,595 Oh no, my, Lucy... 1521 01:29:53,596 --> 01:29:54,554 Oh my God. 1522 01:29:54,555 --> 01:29:56,139 And you know what's going to happen next, 1523 01:29:56,140 --> 01:29:57,432 right? 1524 01:29:57,433 --> 01:30:01,479 She's going back after Lucy's tree. Ohhh! 1525 01:30:02,230 --> 01:30:04,189 Oh, see! Oh, look. 1526 01:30:04,190 --> 01:30:05,107 This is not all. 1527 01:30:05,108 --> 01:30:07,318 It’s not gonna work for either of them. 1528 01:30:08,736 --> 01:30:09,444 Wow. We thought 1529 01:30:09,445 --> 01:30:11,447 we had a hard time decorating our living room. 1530 01:30:13,157 --> 01:30:13,573 They had it 1531 01:30:13,574 --> 01:30:15,576 way worse. -Wow... 1532 01:30:16,786 --> 01:30:18,578 Oh, my God... 1533 01:30:18,579 --> 01:30:19,329 What? 1534 01:30:19,330 --> 01:30:21,332 It's snowing. 1535 01:30:22,542 --> 01:30:25,044 Oh! So beautiful. 1536 01:30:26,712 --> 01:30:28,714 I can't believe it's snowing. 1537 01:30:30,341 --> 01:30:32,343 So peaceful. 1538 01:30:33,219 --> 01:30:35,221 It's perfect. 1539 01:30:35,346 --> 01:30:37,348 Snowing on Christmas. 1540 01:30:41,894 --> 01:30:43,896 It's Christmas? 1541 01:30:47,984 --> 01:30:49,986 Yeah... 1542 01:30:51,070 --> 01:31:01,122 it's Christmas. 1543 01:31:05,585 --> 01:31:32,403 (Michael humming “Silent Night”) 1544 01:31:36,365 --> 01:31:38,868 (James humming “Silent Night”) 1545 01:31:51,172 --> 01:31:52,089 Merry Christmas. 1546 01:31:54,091 --> 01:31:56,093 Merry Christmas James. 1547 01:32:13,861 --> 01:32:20,701 (Music, Song) 1548 01:32:23,079 --> 01:32:24,454 What good is this 1549 01:32:24,455 --> 01:32:26,707 life God give us anyway. 1550 01:32:29,460 --> 01:32:32,630 I must of asked a thousand times. 1551 01:32:35,299 --> 01:32:37,718 Why get out of the bed 1552 01:32:37,885 --> 01:32:39,887 another day. 1553 01:32:41,764 --> 01:32:44,892 I can't control the hands of time. 1554 01:32:47,687 --> 01:32:48,520 One moment, 1555 01:32:48,521 --> 01:32:49,896 so, dear, 1556 01:32:49,897 --> 01:32:52,858 the next minute you're here, 1557 01:32:53,025 --> 01:32:58,447 the missing piece that, made it all clear, 1558 01:32:58,573 --> 01:33:03,786 It hit me like the snow falling from inside. 1559 01:33:04,745 --> 01:33:07,080 It struck me like the lightning 1560 01:33:07,081 --> 01:33:09,500 from the sky. 1561 01:33:10,918 --> 01:33:12,711 It came to me in a 1562 01:33:12,712 --> 01:33:16,090 voice so sweet and s clear and true. 1563 01:33:17,049 --> 01:33:22,305 What I've been searching for all my life. 1564 01:33:23,431 --> 01:33:24,639 It's you. 1565 01:33:24,640 --> 01:33:27,309 I know it's part of the plan 1566 01:33:27,310 --> 01:33:29,312 anyway. 1567 01:33:30,855 --> 01:33:34,275 To surrender it all in time. 1568 01:33:36,902 --> 01:33:40,823 Is it too much to ask to live a day? 1569 01:33:43,200 --> 01:33:46,412 When I'm just glad to be alive. 1570 01:33:48,998 --> 01:33:50,665 So bitter sweet. 1571 01:33:50,666 --> 01:33:54,502 But nothing can compete 1572 01:33:54,503 --> 01:33:57,255 with your sweet love. 1573 01:33:57,256 --> 01:34:00,009 That that made me see. 1574 01:34:00,051 --> 01:34:04,096 It hit me like a snow falling on pumpkins. 1575 01:34:06,307 --> 01:34:07,223 It struck me like the 1576 01:34:07,224 --> 01:34:10,561 lightning from the sky. 1577 01:34:12,480 --> 01:34:16,358 It came to me in a voice so sweet and so 1578 01:34:16,359 --> 01:34:18,361 clear and true 1579 01:34:18,569 --> 01:34:23,115 What I've been searching for all my 1580 01:34:24,950 --> 01:34:28,954 life, is you. 1581 01:34:38,464 --> 01:34:40,675 One moment so dear. 1582 01:34:40,716 --> 01:34:43,718 The next minute you're here. 1583 01:34:43,719 --> 01:34:49,266 The missing piece that made it all clear. 1584 01:34:49,433 --> 01:34:54,355 It hit me like the snow falling on pumpkins. 1585 01:34:55,523 --> 01:34:57,525 It struck me like a light. 1586 01:35:01,654 --> 01:35:03,279 It hit me like a snow 1587 01:35:03,280 --> 01:35:06,450 falling on comets. 1588 01:35:07,868 --> 01:35:10,161 It struck me like the lightning 1589 01:35:10,162 --> 01:35:12,206 from the sky. 1590 01:35:13,999 --> 01:35:17,168 It came to me in a voice so sweet 1591 01:35:17,169 --> 01:35:19,171 and so clear and true. 1592 01:35:20,089 --> 01:35:22,590 What I've been searching 1593 01:35:22,591 --> 01:35:25,261 for all my life. 1594 01:35:26,470 --> 01:35:30,182 It's you... 1595 01:35:32,685 --> 01:35:36,355 It's you... 1596 01:35:38,566 --> 01:35:42,318 It hit me like the snow falling on 1597 01:35:42,319 --> 01:35:44,321 pumpkins... 1598 01:36:00,629 --> 01:36:02,631 So you know. 1599 01:36:05,259 --> 01:36:09,096 You're my favorite, favorite nephew. 1600 01:36:11,015 --> 01:36:12,307 And don't say it's 1601 01:36:12,308 --> 01:36:14,977 because you're my only nephew. 1602 01:36:16,061 --> 01:36:17,520 You always say that. 1603 01:36:17,521 --> 01:36:20,274 That you know that I love you dearly. 1604 01:36:22,568 --> 01:36:25,571 So I just wanna ask you a question. 1605 01:36:26,363 --> 01:36:28,365 Is there anybody in your life? 1606 01:36:29,450 --> 01:36:31,535 Well, there's this one guy. 1607 01:36:32,036 --> 01:36:34,038 That I met at a bookstore. 1608 01:36:34,079 --> 01:36:36,665 I wasn't even supposed to be working at the time, but 1609 01:36:38,626 --> 01:36:40,752 we were talking for hours and hours 1610 01:36:40,753 --> 01:36:44,048 and he's coming over for dinner this weekend. 1611 01:36:44,590 --> 01:36:46,592 Oh, good. 1612 01:36:47,802 --> 01:36:49,845 Oh, that'll be beautiful. 1613 01:36:50,137 --> 01:36:52,139 I'm nervous. I'm a little scared. 1614 01:36:52,640 --> 01:36:54,557 Oh... no. Don't be. 1615 01:36:54,558 --> 01:36:56,560 Don't be scared. 1616 01:36:58,020 --> 01:37:00,022 You’ll follow your heart. 1617 01:37:01,148 --> 01:37:04,777 And things will all be good at the end. 1618 01:37:06,403 --> 01:37:08,405 And I think that... 1619 01:37:08,531 --> 01:37:11,075 I think the world is your oyster.