1 00:00:59,475 --> 00:01:01,853 We've gone as far as we can go by road. 2 00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:04,063 We need a boat. 3 00:01:04,897 --> 00:01:07,608 Should only take a few days. 4 00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:10,027 We shouldn't be here. 5 00:01:10,403 --> 00:01:12,280 The jungle doesn't want us here. 6 00:01:13,072 --> 00:01:14,365 There is... 7 00:01:45,980 --> 00:01:47,899 We have to do this. 8 00:01:48,524 --> 00:01:50,943 What's waiting for us will change our lives. 9 00:01:53,654 --> 00:01:54,655 Fine. 10 00:01:55,531 --> 00:01:56,489 I'll go alone. 11 00:01:56,490 --> 00:01:57,408 Ana. 12 00:01:57,992 --> 00:01:58,951 Ana! 13 00:01:59,785 --> 00:02:01,037 Don't do this! 14 00:02:18,513 --> 00:02:19,263 It's her. 15 00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:31,734 Get to the boat! 16 00:02:40,243 --> 00:02:41,827 Come on! Let's go! 17 00:02:43,829 --> 00:02:44,747 - Hey! - Stop! 18 00:02:45,706 --> 00:02:46,415 Take my hand! 19 00:03:04,141 --> 00:03:05,935 We start tight on a full moon. 20 00:03:07,103 --> 00:03:09,355 Milky. Almost yellow. 21 00:03:10,606 --> 00:03:11,983 And we crane down 22 00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:17,071 to reveal an idyllic, suburban street. 23 00:03:17,989 --> 00:03:21,533 We float past a series of white picket fences, 24 00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:23,327 until we settle on a sewer grate. 25 00:03:24,495 --> 00:03:25,913 Pow! Flies open! 26 00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:29,416 Something big and scaly slithers out, 27 00:03:29,417 --> 00:03:32,711 fast, hungry, definitely not human, 28 00:03:32,712 --> 00:03:34,964 as a pulsating score kicks in. 29 00:03:44,265 --> 00:03:46,057 We're on the back of the beast 30 00:03:46,058 --> 00:03:49,228 as it slithers menacingly towards a little blue house. 31 00:04:02,617 --> 00:04:04,367 Wait. I'm sorry. 32 00:04:04,368 --> 00:04:07,412 This is our wedding video you're talking about? 33 00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:11,374 Yes, though I actually don't think of them as videos. They're more like short films. 34 00:04:11,375 --> 00:04:15,712 Yeah, because I'm not sure this is quite what we had in mind. 35 00:04:15,713 --> 00:04:17,963 Okay. I know. It's a little different than normal but-- 36 00:04:17,964 --> 00:04:20,967 We really liked the one you did for Karen and Bart. 37 00:04:20,968 --> 00:04:22,427 When they walk by the river 38 00:04:22,428 --> 00:04:24,763 - and jump up and high-five. - That jump was dope. 39 00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:26,223 And I loved that song they used. 40 00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:30,268 I don't want to wait For our lives to be over 41 00:04:30,269 --> 00:04:34,231 I want to know right now How does it feel 42 00:04:34,232 --> 00:04:37,108 - You know it. Yeah. - Guys. Here's the thing. 43 00:04:37,109 --> 00:04:40,195 I really like you guys. And you said you're horror fans, 44 00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:42,322 and I'm like, "I love horror so much." 45 00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:45,158 And I thought this could be special. You know what I mean? 46 00:04:45,159 --> 00:04:47,786 This is a film you're gonna watch for the rest of your lives. 47 00:04:47,787 --> 00:04:49,913 But this isn't a film, Doug. 48 00:04:49,914 --> 00:04:53,750 This is a wedding video, and we want one where they do a little jump. 49 00:04:53,751 --> 00:04:55,795 - Yeah. - Now, can you do that for us or not? 50 00:05:03,010 --> 00:05:04,427 Okay. 51 00:05:04,428 --> 00:05:07,556 And do you mind if I'm doing warm-ups? Is it okay? 52 00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:09,558 Oh, yeah. I've seen much crazier. 53 00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:10,642 Okay, good. 54 00:05:10,643 --> 00:05:13,186 Does it sound better to say my line, 55 00:05:13,187 --> 00:05:16,314 "His vision is blurry, which could suggest..." 56 00:05:16,315 --> 00:05:19,526 or, "His vision is blurry, which could suggest..." 57 00:05:19,527 --> 00:05:22,362 Or I could-- You know what? I could even do, like, an accent. I could do just... 58 00:05:22,363 --> 00:05:24,990 I think you just should do it the way you auditioned it, honey. 59 00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:26,074 - Yeah. - Yeah. 60 00:05:26,075 --> 00:05:29,911 It's been a while since I booked anything, and I just want it to go well. 61 00:05:29,912 --> 00:05:31,329 - Yeah. - I just... 62 00:05:31,330 --> 00:05:32,790 It's hard out there. 63 00:05:34,041 --> 00:05:35,125 Sorry. 64 00:05:35,126 --> 00:05:37,002 Doctor number 3, we're ready for you. 65 00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:38,211 Okay, knock 'em dead. 66 00:05:38,212 --> 00:05:39,921 Okay, thanks. Thank you, Donna. 67 00:05:39,922 --> 00:05:42,549 Hey, by the way, if you ever need anything from Lowe's, 68 00:05:42,550 --> 00:05:44,509 I will hook you up with my employee discount, 69 00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:45,720 no questions asked. 70 00:05:46,220 --> 00:05:47,555 - Okay? - Okay. 71 00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:55,020 Thanks. Ten more ccs of tramadol. 72 00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:56,771 Any idea what I'm looking at here? 73 00:05:56,772 --> 00:05:58,481 He said his vision was blurry, 74 00:05:58,482 --> 00:06:01,694 - so, you know, that could suggest-- - Optic neuritis. 75 00:06:02,486 --> 00:06:03,862 Already ruled that out. 76 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,447 - Cut. - That's a cut! 77 00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:07,741 Hey, buddy, not sure what that accent is. 78 00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:09,993 Just do it normally, okay? 79 00:06:09,994 --> 00:06:11,286 We're gonna go again right away. 80 00:06:11,287 --> 00:06:12,204 Set. 81 00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:17,000 He said his vision was blurry, which could suggest-- 82 00:06:17,001 --> 00:06:20,045 Cut! Say the line faster. Okay? Faster this time. 83 00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:22,339 He said his vision was blurry, which could suggest-- 84 00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:24,841 Cut! Jesus, I think we gotta fire this guy. 85 00:06:24,842 --> 00:06:26,469 Can we get somebody else in here? 86 00:07:11,305 --> 00:07:15,267 Griff, it's Doug. I just ran into your mom at the supermarket. 87 00:07:15,268 --> 00:07:17,144 She said you booked a big gig today. 88 00:07:17,854 --> 00:07:18,812 I'm proud of you, bud. 89 00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:21,147 Everyone in Buffalo misses you. 90 00:07:21,148 --> 00:07:23,651 I love you. Come visit, man! 91 00:07:25,653 --> 00:07:26,987 Jesus, Jerry. 92 00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:30,575 Doug, what is this thing about-- there's some kind of sewer monster? 93 00:07:31,367 --> 00:07:32,451 Oh, boy. 94 00:07:34,453 --> 00:07:35,454 Doug. 95 00:07:36,581 --> 00:07:40,585 Look, I get that this is not what you dreamed about when you were a kid. 96 00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:43,336 But dreams, they go. Huh? 97 00:07:43,337 --> 00:07:45,338 Now, I'll be retiring soon. 98 00:07:45,339 --> 00:07:49,426 And, Doug, it is only a matter of time before all this is yours. 99 00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:50,510 - Really? - Yeah. 100 00:07:50,511 --> 00:07:52,805 Look around. Take it all in. 101 00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:55,183 And imagine. 102 00:07:56,934 --> 00:08:00,020 If you do it right, it's a pretty sweet setup we got here. 103 00:08:00,021 --> 00:08:03,649 This is a B, and maybe even a B+ life we're talking about. 104 00:08:06,777 --> 00:08:09,947 Are you sure you don't wanna do anything for your birthday? 105 00:08:10,448 --> 00:08:12,742 You used to make me celebrate your half-birthdays. 106 00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,745 Let's go get a beer. 107 00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:17,663 Or something. 108 00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:21,500 Maybe we just watch that new mountain climbing doc. 109 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,462 About the lady that falls to her own death? 110 00:08:24,962 --> 00:08:26,171 Yeah. 111 00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:30,842 Fine, we can do the one about the free diver in the Maldives. 112 00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:33,512 Who drowns? Jesus Christ, Doug. 113 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:35,805 I don't know. Let's just take a gummy and go to bed early. 114 00:08:35,806 --> 00:08:37,517 Surprise! 115 00:08:39,227 --> 00:08:41,228 Oh, my God, Malie. No! 116 00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:44,064 Oh, yes. Yes, you love a good, big birthday party. 117 00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:45,732 Dad, should've seen your face. 118 00:08:45,733 --> 00:08:47,651 - You knew about this? - It was my idea. 119 00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:49,653 - Buddy, take my coat, please. Thank you. - Okay. 120 00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,029 Hey! How are you? 121 00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:54,032 - Yeah. Happy birthday! - Jesus, Kenny. My back! 122 00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:56,451 - I'm sorry. - No! That's not... 123 00:08:56,452 --> 00:08:58,912 The actual lotion. The actual basket. 124 00:08:58,913 --> 00:09:00,705 "It puts the lotion in the basket"? 125 00:09:00,706 --> 00:09:02,666 - eBay, buddy. - Dude, that is sick. 126 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:04,627 Yeah, no, that is actually sick. 127 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:09,422 - Happy birthday, Dougie. - Thanks for making the trek, Claire. 128 00:09:09,423 --> 00:09:14,594 You know I love Buffalo this time of year. The slush, the hypothermia. 129 00:09:14,595 --> 00:09:15,887 What's up? No Trent? 130 00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:17,222 No Trent. 131 00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:18,890 Ever again, in fact. 132 00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:21,142 He started banging his dental hygienist. 133 00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:24,062 Anyway, tonight is all about you, baby. 134 00:09:24,063 --> 00:09:25,731 - It's about me. - It's about you. 135 00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:31,486 You came! Here you are. Oh, my God. 136 00:09:31,487 --> 00:09:32,571 It's been too long, pal. 137 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:35,031 It's so good to see you. It has been way too long. 138 00:09:35,032 --> 00:09:36,116 Happy birthday. 139 00:09:36,117 --> 00:09:37,826 Thank you for coming out here. 140 00:09:37,827 --> 00:09:39,327 Think I'm gonna miss this? Never. 141 00:09:39,328 --> 00:09:41,037 We got a lot of catching up to do. 142 00:09:41,038 --> 00:09:46,835 Many years ago, a group of young, passionate artists had a vision. 143 00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:52,549 It was a vision that's not particularly original or even good, 144 00:09:52,550 --> 00:09:54,593 but it was theirs. 145 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:58,013 And so they made that vision a reality. 146 00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:00,640 And, without further ado, 147 00:10:00,641 --> 00:10:05,770 I present to you a completely unrestored print 148 00:10:05,771 --> 00:10:10,860 of 13-year-old Doug McCallister's masterpiece, The Quatch. 149 00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,945 What? I thought we lost all the copies of that! 150 00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:15,030 - No way. - Nope. 151 00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:17,908 I found it in my mom's garage. It was stuck in the player. 152 00:10:17,909 --> 00:10:20,327 Are we sure this is okay for the kids to watch? 153 00:10:20,328 --> 00:10:21,620 Who gives a shit? 154 00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:24,748 Mrs. Brown had us bleep all the swears so we could show it at the school assembly. 155 00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:26,041 Yeah, which didn't make much sense 156 00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:28,668 because we were very clear about it being R-rated. 157 00:10:28,669 --> 00:10:31,254 - Happy birthday, pal. - This isn't happening. 158 00:10:31,255 --> 00:10:33,174 It's happening. Here we go. 159 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:35,967 - God. - Here, sit. 160 00:10:35,968 --> 00:10:37,637 I'm gonna kill you. 161 00:10:41,057 --> 00:10:42,433 I haven't changed a bit. 162 00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:45,561 Holy ****! 163 00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:48,897 - Look at the grass! - Hot on the trail! 164 00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:51,358 - Look out for the quatch. - Here we go. 165 00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:54,945 Before you **** strike me, I need to **** ask you one **** thing. 166 00:10:54,946 --> 00:10:56,655 You got some **** bite left? 167 00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:57,614 Or you all **** bark? 168 00:10:57,615 --> 00:10:58,865 Boom! 169 00:10:58,866 --> 00:11:01,535 Damn, we'd been watching a lot of Scorsese. 170 00:11:01,536 --> 00:11:03,662 We didn't quite have the ear for it, did we? 171 00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:06,540 - I need to tell you something. - What is it? 172 00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:09,626 That I love you. I've always loved you. 173 00:11:09,627 --> 00:11:11,378 And I always **** will. 174 00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:12,879 I **** love you too. 175 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:14,799 Now, kiss me, woman. 176 00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:19,052 So much charisma. Already, you had it. 177 00:11:19,053 --> 00:11:21,638 I still can't believe I let Doug talk me into doing that. 178 00:11:21,639 --> 00:11:23,391 What are you talking about? That was your idea. 179 00:11:25,893 --> 00:11:26,936 Yeah! 180 00:11:27,562 --> 00:11:29,771 - It's coming for us. - We're trapped. 181 00:11:29,772 --> 00:11:31,399 What the hell are we gonna do? 182 00:11:32,650 --> 00:11:33,484 - No! - Yes. 183 00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:36,487 Oh, my God. We're all gonna die! 184 00:11:40,449 --> 00:11:42,158 This is where it gets real. 185 00:11:42,159 --> 00:11:44,453 Not on my watch, mister. 186 00:11:46,455 --> 00:11:48,248 - Boom! - Yeah! 187 00:11:48,249 --> 00:11:50,125 - Yeah! - Yeah! 188 00:11:50,126 --> 00:11:51,502 Amazing! 189 00:11:52,753 --> 00:11:54,130 So good! 190 00:11:59,468 --> 00:12:02,470 That's probably the best birthday gift I've ever received. 191 00:12:02,471 --> 00:12:04,890 - I didn't even know it existed. - Well, I'm giving it to you. 192 00:12:04,891 --> 00:12:06,893 Plus the TV 'cause you can't get it out. 193 00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,103 - Yay! - Yes! 194 00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:16,193 - It was right after, you know... - Right after senior year of college. 195 00:12:16,194 --> 00:12:19,571 Yes, that's when Anaconda came out. Remember? We saw it like 30 times. 196 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,531 Put it right there alongside the classics. 197 00:12:21,532 --> 00:12:23,491 Totally. How about that cast? Come on. 198 00:12:23,492 --> 00:12:27,078 - J.Lo, Ice Cube, Owen Wilson, Stoltz. - Oh, for sure. 199 00:12:27,079 --> 00:12:28,371 I mean, it's a murderers' row. 200 00:12:28,372 --> 00:12:33,127 Plus, that snake was like a metaphor for our lives at that moment. 201 00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:37,589 Like, how life is coming at you, you know, 202 00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:40,550 hunting you and forcing you, like, 203 00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:41,719 off your... 204 00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:44,805 like your parents' health insurance and stuff. 205 00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:49,684 - I don't know... - No, that's true. 206 00:12:49,685 --> 00:12:51,102 - Yeah, that's... - It was like that. 207 00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:52,562 - That's right, Kenny. - Whatever. 208 00:12:52,563 --> 00:12:56,525 How about that accent by Jon Voight? How about that? That was a choice. 209 00:12:56,526 --> 00:12:59,569 "They wrap around you until you get the privilege 210 00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:01,655 - of hearing your bones break... - Bones break... 211 00:13:01,656 --> 00:13:07,495 ...before the power of embrace causes your veins to explode." 212 00:13:08,162 --> 00:13:09,163 Sorry. 213 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,709 I have the rights to Anaconda. 214 00:13:15,711 --> 00:13:16,754 What? 215 00:13:17,171 --> 00:13:18,840 I have the rights to Anaconda. 216 00:13:20,341 --> 00:13:21,675 Yeah. 217 00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:26,513 Apparently, the movie was based on a novel by some dead Japanese guy. 218 00:13:26,514 --> 00:13:30,350 And my agent introduced me to his widow. 219 00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:35,564 Unbelievably, she was such a fan of the four episodes that I did on S.W.A.T... 220 00:13:35,565 --> 00:13:37,774 - Who isn't? - ...that she gave me the rights. 221 00:13:37,775 --> 00:13:40,528 Dude. So what are you gonna do with them? 222 00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:42,488 Well, not me. 223 00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:44,991 Us. 224 00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:49,160 We're gonna reboot the thing. Indie-style. 225 00:13:49,161 --> 00:13:53,582 Three weeks, run-and-gun in the Amazon. Skeletal crew. 226 00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:56,793 Claire, you and I can star. Kenny, you shoot it. Doug, you direct. 227 00:13:56,794 --> 00:13:59,379 Huh? Come on. What do you say? 228 00:13:59,380 --> 00:14:01,798 I mean, it's a wonderful idea in theory, but... 229 00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:05,135 I'm in! I can get time off from work. 230 00:14:05,136 --> 00:14:06,845 Yes, you can, Kenny. Sweet! 231 00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:10,515 Kenny, what are you talking about? You're in? He's not... No. He's not in. 232 00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:13,935 He says one thing and you're in already. You're going to the Amazon. 233 00:14:13,936 --> 00:14:16,563 - He's not in. - What do you say, Claire? 234 00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:18,190 - I just... - Come on. 235 00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:20,066 I don't know if I'm in the right headspace... 236 00:14:20,067 --> 00:14:21,318 - Of course you are. - ...with the divorce. 237 00:14:21,319 --> 00:14:23,236 Of course you're not in the right headspace. 238 00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:25,280 That's the best headspace. Are you kidding me? 239 00:14:25,281 --> 00:14:28,617 Come on, it's like Eat Pray Love and... shit. 240 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:29,619 Come on. 241 00:14:30,411 --> 00:14:32,454 You know what? I'm in. 242 00:14:32,455 --> 00:14:34,956 - What? Really? - Yes! Sweet. 243 00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:37,375 Yeah. I mean, my life is totally shit anyway so... 244 00:14:37,376 --> 00:14:39,336 God, I'm so happy to hear that. 245 00:14:39,337 --> 00:14:42,005 I mean, not that your life is shit, but that you're in. 246 00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:44,049 Besides, as soon as Doug says yes, 247 00:14:44,050 --> 00:14:46,009 we'll probably need you to finance this whole thing. 248 00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:47,511 - What? - Thank you. 249 00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:48,554 Doug? 250 00:14:52,808 --> 00:14:54,894 Griff, I'm sorry. 251 00:14:55,478 --> 00:14:59,314 I got responsibilities. I got Malie, Charlie, my job. 252 00:14:59,315 --> 00:15:01,983 I know. Making wedding videos. 253 00:15:01,984 --> 00:15:03,402 Films. Right. 254 00:15:04,028 --> 00:15:05,696 It's a good life, you know? 255 00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:08,074 It's a B, B+ life. 256 00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:10,743 B, B+ life? 257 00:15:12,245 --> 00:15:13,454 It's a good life. 258 00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:16,540 Do you remember when we were kids 259 00:15:16,541 --> 00:15:18,208 and we would stay up till 4:00 in the morning, 260 00:15:18,209 --> 00:15:20,795 hanging out in your mom's basement watching horror movies? 261 00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:23,255 Scaring the shit out of ourselves. 262 00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:25,507 Texas Chainsaw on, like, repeat. 263 00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:28,010 Now we have the chance to make one ourselves. 264 00:15:28,845 --> 00:15:31,722 Dude, it's what we dreamed about ever since we were little kids. 265 00:15:33,474 --> 00:15:34,642 I hear ya. 266 00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:37,895 But we're not kids anymore, Griff. 267 00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:39,814 I'm sorry. 268 00:15:42,108 --> 00:15:43,818 Yeah. I know. All right. 269 00:15:44,819 --> 00:15:45,862 I just... 270 00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:47,947 I get it. I do. 271 00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:50,032 I get it. 272 00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:57,874 Still watching The Quatch. 273 00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:05,590 Charlie, why don't you go check on those cookies? 274 00:16:06,174 --> 00:16:08,718 Okay, but I'm pausing it, so... 275 00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:10,303 don't touch it. 276 00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:13,555 Gonna need some ice-cold milch with that. 277 00:16:13,556 --> 00:16:14,807 You got it. 278 00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:17,601 - What are you doing? - What? 279 00:16:17,602 --> 00:16:19,019 Just go make the movie. 280 00:16:19,020 --> 00:16:20,395 Malie. 281 00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:23,023 Come on. Every time you watch this thing, you light up. 282 00:16:23,024 --> 00:16:26,193 Like I haven't seen you light up in a long time. 283 00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:29,696 So what? I'm supposed to chase some Hollywood fantasy I had as a kid? 284 00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,990 Waste a bunch of money and time, and for what? 285 00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:34,202 In the end, what's it gonna change? 286 00:16:36,787 --> 00:16:37,788 Okay. 287 00:16:39,165 --> 00:16:40,166 Okay. 288 00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:41,709 Okay. 289 00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:51,551 We hope you come to celebrate... 290 00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:52,594 As we become... 291 00:16:52,595 --> 00:16:53,971 The Hansons. 292 00:16:55,556 --> 00:16:57,433 Holy shit. 293 00:17:09,319 --> 00:17:11,489 ...what will it be? 294 00:17:12,740 --> 00:17:17,411 I don't want to wait For our lives to be over 295 00:17:17,912 --> 00:17:19,829 What am I singing? 296 00:17:21,915 --> 00:17:22,916 Hey, dude. 297 00:17:25,086 --> 00:17:26,378 I don't want to wait, man. 298 00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:31,634 Our lives could be, like... over. 299 00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:33,635 What are you talking about? 300 00:17:33,636 --> 00:17:37,139 The Anaconda thing. You were serious, right? 301 00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:39,266 Yes, very. 302 00:17:39,267 --> 00:17:40,685 Then let's do it. 303 00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:43,729 Let's reboot Anaconda. 304 00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:46,440 Yes! Yes. 305 00:18:07,753 --> 00:18:11,047 All right, budget-wise, soup to nuts, what does it cost to get this thing made? 306 00:18:11,048 --> 00:18:14,885 I figure we need three weeks of shooting. Some VFX, some SFX, 307 00:18:14,886 --> 00:18:18,180 a riverboat, a riverboat captain, travel to and from a jungle, 308 00:18:18,181 --> 00:18:21,933 and a gigantic real snake, preferably a rental. 309 00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,518 - Rental, copy. - All in, 310 00:18:23,519 --> 00:18:25,479 two, two-and-a-half million dollars. 311 00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:27,230 That sounds right. 312 00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:31,610 We've approved a loan for you for up to... 313 00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,486 $9,400. 314 00:18:33,487 --> 00:18:34,821 Yes! 315 00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:37,616 I've revised the budget down to... 316 00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:39,034 $43,000 all in. 317 00:18:39,035 --> 00:18:40,410 That sounds more right. 318 00:18:40,411 --> 00:18:42,370 Now, the film does have to be scary, right? 319 00:18:42,371 --> 00:18:46,291 Terrifying. But it can't just be about a giant snake killing people. 320 00:18:46,292 --> 00:18:47,626 - Exactly. - You know? 321 00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,753 It has to be about something, right? 322 00:18:49,754 --> 00:18:50,755 Right. 323 00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:53,131 I mean... 324 00:18:53,132 --> 00:18:54,175 - Themes. - Themes. 325 00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:56,259 Come on. 326 00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:58,053 - Like grief. - What about revenge? 327 00:18:58,054 --> 00:19:00,722 In terms of themes, that's like one of the top ones. 328 00:19:00,723 --> 00:19:02,682 - Oh, my God. I got a good one. - Hit me. 329 00:19:02,683 --> 00:19:04,560 Intergenerational trauma. 330 00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:06,770 I love intergenerational trauma. 331 00:19:06,771 --> 00:19:08,480 Who doesn't love intergenerational trauma? 332 00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:10,691 - It's the best. - We're onto something here. 333 00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:20,325 This is a masterpiece. 334 00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:22,577 You're a goddamn genius. I love it. 335 00:19:22,578 --> 00:19:24,079 - Don't change a word. - Not a word. 336 00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,456 Dude, you killed it. It's scary, emotional, funny when it needs to be. 337 00:19:26,457 --> 00:19:28,917 - Romantic. - Dude, thank you. 338 00:19:28,918 --> 00:19:30,169 Hey, Doug... 339 00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:35,174 I know that we had our little dustup, but... 340 00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:38,677 I need to shoot this film, man. 341 00:19:38,678 --> 00:19:39,804 Dustup? 342 00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:43,932 Yeah. He fired me from the wedding video stuff 343 00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:46,601 'cause I got a little wasted. 344 00:19:46,602 --> 00:19:48,062 He knocked over the wedding cake. 345 00:19:49,063 --> 00:19:51,982 - But I'm dealing with it. - Like, getting sober? 346 00:19:51,983 --> 00:19:53,066 Yes. 347 00:19:53,067 --> 00:19:55,485 Well, I mean, Buffalo sober. 348 00:19:55,486 --> 00:19:56,486 Buffalo sober? 349 00:19:56,487 --> 00:19:57,822 Just beer and wine. 350 00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:02,785 And then some of the lighter liquors. But definitely not all of 'em. 351 00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:05,162 I'm proud of you. 352 00:20:06,497 --> 00:20:07,707 Doug? 353 00:20:09,834 --> 00:20:12,669 If I'm being honest, I enabled you a little bit. 354 00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:15,131 Of course you get a second chance. Let's do this. 355 00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:17,091 - Nice! - Thank you, man. 356 00:20:18,342 --> 00:20:19,801 Car's here. 357 00:20:19,802 --> 00:20:23,471 And you have the mefloquine, right? You only take that once a week. 358 00:20:23,472 --> 00:20:26,266 Hey, Dad. I almost forgot. 359 00:20:26,267 --> 00:20:30,312 - Talk to me. - But I got you this. 360 00:20:30,313 --> 00:20:31,813 What? 361 00:20:31,814 --> 00:20:33,107 I know. Pretty sick. 362 00:20:33,691 --> 00:20:36,610 "World's greatest Doug." 363 00:20:36,611 --> 00:20:39,279 - I thought it should say, "Dad." - Whatever, man, it's funny. 364 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,490 I love it. It's much better. 365 00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:21,238 - So it begins. - Yeah! 366 00:21:21,239 --> 00:21:23,241 - Oh, yeah. - All right. Made it. 367 00:21:24,408 --> 00:21:26,993 - We're here. - That's what I'm talkin' about! 368 00:21:26,994 --> 00:21:28,496 Brasília! 369 00:21:29,205 --> 00:21:31,873 So, hey, I was reading about anacondas on the plane. 370 00:21:31,874 --> 00:21:34,835 Basically, they wait in the water for days, 371 00:21:34,836 --> 00:21:37,921 stalking their prey, never moving, just waiting, 372 00:21:37,922 --> 00:21:39,340 and then when a prey comes... 373 00:21:39,966 --> 00:21:41,049 snatch and grab. 374 00:21:41,050 --> 00:21:43,844 Thousand pounds of pressure. Think you're gonna get away? You're not. 375 00:21:43,845 --> 00:21:46,681 Crushing you. Oxygen leaving your lungs. 376 00:21:48,391 --> 00:21:49,975 Oh, God, it's terrible. 377 00:21:49,976 --> 00:21:52,644 - So, like in the movie Anaconda. - Yeah, exactly. 378 00:21:52,645 --> 00:21:53,728 So it's real? 379 00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:54,897 Yeah, it's all real. 380 00:21:56,816 --> 00:21:58,651 Very real. 381 00:22:00,069 --> 00:22:02,738 There's this story about this woman... 382 00:22:03,364 --> 00:22:04,365 God bless her. 383 00:22:05,032 --> 00:22:07,577 The snake wraps around her so tight... 384 00:22:09,579 --> 00:22:11,205 the eyeballs just... 385 00:22:12,832 --> 00:22:14,791 - No. - No way. 386 00:22:14,792 --> 00:22:16,877 Yeah, it was my grandmother, Sylvana. 387 00:22:16,878 --> 00:22:18,003 Shit. 388 00:22:18,004 --> 00:22:21,299 Horrible grandmother. But still sad. 389 00:22:22,592 --> 00:22:23,759 I'm sorry, who are you? 390 00:22:24,427 --> 00:22:27,512 I'm sorry. Carlos Santiago. Yeah, you can call me Santiago. 391 00:22:27,513 --> 00:22:29,598 - Hey! It's Kenny. - Yeah, hey. 392 00:22:29,599 --> 00:22:32,225 - Kenny from the phone. Hey. - Kenny. Kenny, hey. 393 00:22:32,226 --> 00:22:34,353 - Hi. - Yeah, this is our snake handler. 394 00:22:35,396 --> 00:22:37,230 - Thank God. - He's supposed to be the best. 395 00:22:37,231 --> 00:22:39,399 No. "Supposed to be"? We have a joker here. 396 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:42,068 No. I am the best. Yes. 397 00:22:42,069 --> 00:22:43,153 - That's good. - Yeah. 398 00:22:43,154 --> 00:22:45,239 So, welcome to Brazil. 399 00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:47,742 Let's meet the snake. 400 00:23:00,171 --> 00:23:02,632 Go around, we'll find her. 401 00:23:21,275 --> 00:23:24,153 When I found him, he was dying of starvation. 402 00:23:24,946 --> 00:23:29,324 His food supply destroyed by gold miners who put mercury in the river. 403 00:23:29,325 --> 00:23:32,161 - Gold miners? - Gold mining poisons our land. 404 00:23:32,954 --> 00:23:36,414 Their greed almost killed my snake. 405 00:23:36,415 --> 00:23:40,210 But I fed him, I nursed him back to life, 406 00:23:40,211 --> 00:23:43,839 and in many ways, he did the same for me. 407 00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:46,550 Yes. A tale as old as time. 408 00:23:46,551 --> 00:23:47,802 Saved by a snake. 409 00:23:50,805 --> 00:23:52,222 What's your name? 410 00:23:52,223 --> 00:23:53,306 What's... Griff. 411 00:23:53,307 --> 00:23:55,476 Okay, Griff. He's not only a snake. 412 00:23:56,185 --> 00:23:58,354 He's my tiny giant, my friend. 413 00:23:59,272 --> 00:24:03,067 One of the most important creatures of the herpetological world. 414 00:24:03,651 --> 00:24:05,318 No, of course... I... Sure. 415 00:24:05,319 --> 00:24:08,154 I didn't... I wasn't trying to... Yes. 416 00:24:08,155 --> 00:24:11,242 Okay. Let me introduce you. 417 00:24:14,745 --> 00:24:16,079 Heitor. 418 00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:18,957 - Heitor? - Oh, my goodness. 419 00:24:18,958 --> 00:24:20,625 Hey, cutie. 420 00:24:20,626 --> 00:24:22,628 - Oh, no. Not cutie. - Oh, my... 421 00:24:24,630 --> 00:24:27,424 Oh, hell yes! This thing is nuts! 422 00:24:27,425 --> 00:24:30,969 There are rumors of 'condas even bigger. 423 00:24:30,970 --> 00:24:33,514 Maybe four or five times this size. 424 00:24:34,932 --> 00:24:36,349 Go ahead, Kenny from the phone. 425 00:24:36,350 --> 00:24:39,645 Is it true that they regurgitate their prey? 426 00:24:40,188 --> 00:24:41,438 Sometimes. 427 00:24:41,439 --> 00:24:43,398 I mean, if you're lucky, 428 00:24:43,399 --> 00:24:46,402 you'd die right away because of suffocation. 429 00:24:47,028 --> 00:24:51,114 But only the unlucky ones survive. 430 00:24:51,115 --> 00:24:52,325 Unlucky? 431 00:24:53,993 --> 00:24:58,455 Yeah, because then you might actually be conscious 432 00:24:58,456 --> 00:25:02,251 when the snake comes back to finish you off. 433 00:25:02,877 --> 00:25:05,755 Gotcha. Better to die. 434 00:25:15,014 --> 00:25:17,725 - Look at that boat! - This is money in the bank, baby. 435 00:25:43,459 --> 00:25:45,127 Hey. Let me ask you a question. 436 00:25:46,462 --> 00:25:47,755 Our snake guy... 437 00:25:48,256 --> 00:25:51,007 Does he seem kind of batshit crazy? 438 00:25:51,008 --> 00:25:53,552 I mean, he's best friends with a snake. 439 00:25:53,553 --> 00:25:55,011 - Of course he's a little quirky. - Yeah. 440 00:25:55,012 --> 00:25:56,096 But I like him. 441 00:25:56,097 --> 00:25:57,013 - Really? - Yeah. 442 00:25:57,014 --> 00:25:58,098 But then again, 443 00:25:58,099 --> 00:26:00,225 I used up all my vacation days 444 00:26:00,226 --> 00:26:03,520 to come make a self-financed snake movie with you three, so... 445 00:26:03,521 --> 00:26:05,730 - Yeah, your judgment is really off. - My judgment is off. 446 00:26:05,731 --> 00:26:06,857 - It always has been. - Exactly. 447 00:26:06,858 --> 00:26:08,900 Anybody talk to the captain? It's time to shoot. 448 00:26:08,901 --> 00:26:10,987 I'll reach out again, boss. 449 00:26:11,988 --> 00:26:14,155 Hi, guys. My name is Ana. 450 00:26:14,156 --> 00:26:15,992 I believe you spoke to my father on the phone? 451 00:26:16,576 --> 00:26:18,160 Bruno? That's your dad? 452 00:26:18,870 --> 00:26:21,080 Yeah, he sends his apologies, but he's at the hospital. 453 00:26:22,415 --> 00:26:23,790 - I'm sorry. - Unfortunately, 454 00:26:23,791 --> 00:26:25,709 you'll have to make other accommodations, 455 00:26:25,710 --> 00:26:28,920 'cause I need to take this boat upriver for a routine service. 456 00:26:28,921 --> 00:26:30,463 But I can assure you a full refund. 457 00:26:30,464 --> 00:26:31,506 No, wait. Wait. 458 00:26:31,507 --> 00:26:33,508 - Everything else is booked. - Yeah. 459 00:26:33,509 --> 00:26:35,385 And we're gonna shoot a movie. 460 00:26:35,386 --> 00:26:37,095 It's a reboot of Anaconda. 461 00:26:37,096 --> 00:26:39,097 Technically, it's more of a reimagining, but-- 462 00:26:39,098 --> 00:26:41,057 It's actually more of a spiritual sequel. 463 00:26:41,058 --> 00:26:42,225 Good for you. 464 00:26:42,226 --> 00:26:44,269 - There's gotta be a way, right? - We can crew the boat. 465 00:26:44,270 --> 00:26:45,353 There's nothing I can do... 466 00:26:45,354 --> 00:26:48,815 We have dreamed of making this film together our entire lives. 467 00:26:48,816 --> 00:26:51,276 Please. I am begging you. 468 00:26:51,277 --> 00:26:53,320 - Please. - Help us find another way. 469 00:26:53,321 --> 00:26:55,113 - Let's do this, but fast. - Okay. 470 00:26:55,114 --> 00:26:56,532 - Yes! Let's go! - Thank you! 471 00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:20,764 Wow! 472 00:27:20,765 --> 00:27:21,848 Yes! 473 00:27:21,849 --> 00:27:23,850 This is so beautiful. 474 00:27:23,851 --> 00:27:25,770 This is amazing. It's amazing. 475 00:27:27,813 --> 00:27:28,939 Looks exactly... 476 00:27:28,940 --> 00:27:29,941 Look! 477 00:27:31,651 --> 00:27:33,026 - Kenny? - Yeah, bud? 478 00:27:33,027 --> 00:27:35,111 - How did you find this boat? - Cocktail, anyone? 479 00:27:35,112 --> 00:27:36,113 Nice! 480 00:27:37,073 --> 00:27:38,074 It's a computer. 481 00:27:40,409 --> 00:27:41,577 Yes! 482 00:27:44,747 --> 00:27:49,001 I want a list of all the boats that left the marina in the last 3 hours. 483 00:27:50,044 --> 00:27:51,128 Now! 484 00:28:01,097 --> 00:28:03,473 One more thing, you guys, before we go to bed. 485 00:28:03,474 --> 00:28:05,267 We got a big day tomorrow. 486 00:28:05,268 --> 00:28:09,396 If you remember, we had a tradition on all our films. 487 00:28:09,397 --> 00:28:11,273 The night before we started shooting, 488 00:28:11,274 --> 00:28:13,900 we would say a prayer to the movie gods, 489 00:28:13,901 --> 00:28:17,112 asking them to basically not screw us over, 490 00:28:17,113 --> 00:28:20,407 and for the first time ever, may they listen. 491 00:28:20,408 --> 00:28:21,993 - Come on, to the movie gods. - Yes. 492 00:28:38,176 --> 00:28:39,467 All right. We're rolling. 493 00:28:39,468 --> 00:28:42,345 Anaconda, scene 15, take one. Slap it. 494 00:28:42,346 --> 00:28:43,848 Bella! 495 00:28:45,016 --> 00:28:48,185 - What the hell are you still doing here? - I've come to take you home. 496 00:28:48,186 --> 00:28:51,147 It's time you stopped chasing this mythical snake. 497 00:28:51,898 --> 00:28:54,192 And what if I'm not prone to giving up? 498 00:28:54,692 --> 00:28:55,943 I didn't see you filming there. 499 00:28:56,485 --> 00:28:57,903 What are we doing? EPK? 500 00:28:57,904 --> 00:28:59,988 Background, DVD, bonus stuff. 501 00:28:59,989 --> 00:29:03,825 The Anaconda is a story of an intrepid biologist played by Claire, 502 00:29:03,826 --> 00:29:09,456 who hires an unhinged snake tracker played by Griff, 503 00:29:09,457 --> 00:29:12,250 to hunt down and kill a giant, mythical 'conda 504 00:29:12,251 --> 00:29:13,585 that ate her entire family. 505 00:29:13,586 --> 00:29:16,546 Come and get me, you goddamn snake! 506 00:29:16,547 --> 00:29:18,798 And on a deeper level, it's about chasing your dreams. 507 00:29:18,799 --> 00:29:24,262 And camera set, push-ups good, and action! 508 00:29:24,263 --> 00:29:25,680 What's it like shooting with Doug again? 509 00:29:25,681 --> 00:29:27,265 He and I are best friends. 510 00:29:27,266 --> 00:29:28,683 We've worked together our whole lives. 511 00:29:28,684 --> 00:29:30,602 And I went out to LA, and he was gonna come out. 512 00:29:30,603 --> 00:29:33,355 We were gonna be a partnership, and he didn't do it. 513 00:29:33,356 --> 00:29:37,692 Griff and I planned to work together in LA, but, you know, life intervened. 514 00:29:37,693 --> 00:29:39,361 But it doesn't matter, 'cause now we're together 515 00:29:39,362 --> 00:29:42,489 and now we're back, we're making this, and it's as it should be. 516 00:29:42,490 --> 00:29:44,200 I am the insects. 517 00:29:45,243 --> 00:29:47,994 The anaconda moves slow and steady. 518 00:29:47,995 --> 00:29:49,162 Sometimes it goes fast. 519 00:29:49,163 --> 00:29:51,707 Snake POV, RD. Take 1. 520 00:29:52,416 --> 00:29:54,334 No. No, it's not working. 521 00:29:54,335 --> 00:29:56,921 Snake POV, the right way. Take 2. 522 00:29:57,755 --> 00:30:00,549 Sometimes he goes from above in the trees, 523 00:30:00,550 --> 00:30:02,676 sometimes from below in the water. 524 00:30:02,677 --> 00:30:06,888 The toothpick, it unlocked a couple of aspects of this character for me. 525 00:30:06,889 --> 00:30:08,015 There's something there. 526 00:30:11,727 --> 00:30:14,187 Why would I be nervous about doing a love story with Griff? 527 00:30:14,188 --> 00:30:15,356 You guys used to date. 528 00:30:15,898 --> 00:30:17,315 That was a long time ago. 529 00:30:17,316 --> 00:30:18,567 A little bit of chaos 530 00:30:18,568 --> 00:30:20,194 is part of the ingredients. 531 00:30:27,743 --> 00:30:28,994 Maybe look at each other. 532 00:30:28,995 --> 00:30:31,079 This might be the last time you look at each other. 533 00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:33,123 You'd think you'd be a little nicer to the guy 534 00:30:33,124 --> 00:30:35,000 who's out here to save your life. 535 00:30:35,001 --> 00:30:36,252 You're an asshole. 536 00:30:38,462 --> 00:30:39,463 Yeah. 537 00:30:40,298 --> 00:30:42,133 And a PhD. 538 00:30:45,511 --> 00:30:46,970 And cut. 539 00:30:46,971 --> 00:30:49,931 Great stuff, guys. We got it. 540 00:30:49,932 --> 00:30:52,851 Should we go one more time? You wanna try it again? 541 00:30:52,852 --> 00:30:54,519 No. I'm good if you're good. 542 00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:55,855 Let's go one more time. 543 00:31:03,821 --> 00:31:07,782 - The chemistry between you two is... - Yeah? 544 00:31:07,783 --> 00:31:09,368 Like we were right back in high school. 545 00:31:10,077 --> 00:31:11,494 When you looked up at her... 546 00:31:11,495 --> 00:31:12,829 Well, that's 'cause of your note. 547 00:31:12,830 --> 00:31:15,040 About taking the beat right before you did it? 548 00:31:15,041 --> 00:31:16,918 Yeah, yeah. It made the scene. 549 00:31:17,502 --> 00:31:18,669 I tell you... 550 00:31:19,837 --> 00:31:21,671 I never felt like this on S.W.A.T. 551 00:31:21,672 --> 00:31:23,965 I mean, granted I was only in a couple of episodes, 552 00:31:23,966 --> 00:31:26,009 but it was never collaborative. It was never fun. 553 00:31:26,010 --> 00:31:27,177 Not... 554 00:31:27,178 --> 00:31:28,845 Not like this. This... 555 00:31:28,846 --> 00:31:31,349 - This is-- - Like we were back on Quatch? 556 00:31:33,226 --> 00:31:34,227 Yeah. 557 00:31:35,770 --> 00:31:36,771 Yeah. 558 00:31:43,110 --> 00:31:44,779 Do you guys have chupacabra? 559 00:31:46,197 --> 00:31:47,865 That looks so good. 560 00:31:49,825 --> 00:31:52,452 Hey, so, one script thing. 561 00:31:52,453 --> 00:31:54,996 I was thinking, at the midway point, 562 00:31:54,997 --> 00:31:58,917 instead of talking the bad guy out of it, 563 00:31:58,918 --> 00:32:00,460 what if... 564 00:32:00,461 --> 00:32:02,213 Claire's character... 565 00:32:03,381 --> 00:32:04,714 headbutts him? 566 00:32:04,715 --> 00:32:06,717 Sorry. Headbutts him? 567 00:32:07,385 --> 00:32:08,510 Headbutts him. 568 00:32:08,511 --> 00:32:10,513 Or... Or... 569 00:32:11,806 --> 00:32:12,889 we both do. 570 00:32:12,890 --> 00:32:14,391 Double headbutt. 571 00:32:14,392 --> 00:32:16,643 - Come on. It's kinda revolutionary. - Double headbutt. 572 00:32:16,644 --> 00:32:18,144 That is super revolutionary. 573 00:32:18,145 --> 00:32:20,188 Why is that super revolutionary? 574 00:32:20,189 --> 00:32:22,357 Well, it's never been done. 575 00:32:22,358 --> 00:32:25,735 Jesus Christ. This is a beautiful scene with real stakes, Doug. 576 00:32:25,736 --> 00:32:27,279 Feel free to weigh in here. 577 00:32:27,280 --> 00:32:28,738 Nah, I hear you. I do. 578 00:32:28,739 --> 00:32:31,325 And, as always, I trust your instincts on this. 579 00:32:32,869 --> 00:32:35,453 But a double headbutt is pretty revolutionary. 580 00:32:35,454 --> 00:32:38,456 Right? It's very revolutionary. Yes. 581 00:32:38,457 --> 00:32:40,375 - There's no denying it. - None! 582 00:32:40,376 --> 00:32:43,503 Come on, Claire. Is the problem that you don't know how to headbutt? 583 00:32:43,504 --> 00:32:45,881 Why would I not know how to headbutt? 584 00:32:45,882 --> 00:32:48,133 We're not born with these skills. We learn them along the way. 585 00:32:48,134 --> 00:32:51,553 Let me show you. Tight core, breathe in, hold that breath. 586 00:32:51,554 --> 00:32:52,929 Yeah? 587 00:32:52,930 --> 00:32:54,390 And you can vocalize. 588 00:32:55,099 --> 00:32:59,645 Another kind of headbutt is more unleashed, just full-on... 589 00:33:01,230 --> 00:33:02,898 He got the arms in there. That's good. 590 00:33:02,899 --> 00:33:04,524 Send that shit into the goal. 591 00:33:04,525 --> 00:33:07,652 Or you put some Brazilian sauce on that. You know? 592 00:33:07,653 --> 00:33:09,280 And you go, boom! Toma! 593 00:33:09,822 --> 00:33:11,281 - Toma! - Toma? 594 00:33:11,282 --> 00:33:12,490 Hey, I love it. 595 00:33:12,491 --> 00:33:13,783 Yeah, that's right. 596 00:33:13,784 --> 00:33:16,036 - Brazilian spice. - Yeah! 597 00:33:16,037 --> 00:33:19,080 If I was gonna headbutt, I would go for the bridge of the nose. 598 00:33:19,081 --> 00:33:20,625 - Yes. - Just crack it. 599 00:33:21,292 --> 00:33:24,045 - Jesus! - Yes! That's it. 600 00:33:26,088 --> 00:33:28,508 - Jeez. Yeah, that's great. - And you go, "Toma! Toma!" 601 00:33:29,967 --> 00:33:31,802 I think it's a different... Toma! 602 00:33:32,470 --> 00:33:34,180 - Toma! - Yeah, toma! 603 00:33:35,806 --> 00:33:36,849 Goddamn! 604 00:34:28,359 --> 00:34:31,236 I'm sorry, but how could this happen, huh? 605 00:34:31,237 --> 00:34:33,113 Kenny, I thought you said this guy was a pro. 606 00:34:33,114 --> 00:34:36,616 That's what he said, but he hasn't provided us with a certificate. 607 00:34:36,617 --> 00:34:38,869 You fixed the crate, right? It's taken care of? 608 00:34:38,870 --> 00:34:42,540 My thing. My job. Under control. All good. 609 00:34:43,416 --> 00:34:47,587 My Heitor, he's a beautiful, intelligent, smart, sexy creature. 610 00:34:48,504 --> 00:34:50,672 He does exactly what I command. 611 00:34:51,465 --> 00:34:54,634 And I would never let anything happen 612 00:34:54,635 --> 00:34:59,389 to you or the crazy one, or her, or her, or this "actor" here. 613 00:34:59,390 --> 00:35:01,767 - What the... - So have a good night. 614 00:35:03,644 --> 00:35:08,774 May the sounds of the forest be the music of your dreams. 615 00:35:10,943 --> 00:35:12,736 Jesus... 616 00:35:12,737 --> 00:35:14,614 Man, he's a poet. 617 00:35:28,586 --> 00:35:30,922 Okay. Actors, on your marks. 618 00:35:31,714 --> 00:35:33,298 Santiago, is Heitor ready? 619 00:35:33,299 --> 00:35:35,050 Yes, Heitor is always ready. 620 00:35:35,051 --> 00:35:37,428 Heitor is ready, and action! 621 00:35:42,517 --> 00:35:43,518 Cut, please. 622 00:35:45,436 --> 00:35:47,979 - Cut? All right, cut. Yeah. - Yeah, I just-- Sorry. I need a little... 623 00:35:47,980 --> 00:35:49,439 Kenny, do you mind if I... 624 00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:51,651 Santiago, take five. Heitor, five. 625 00:35:52,443 --> 00:35:54,402 - Hey. Wow, that thing, it's really... - Hey. 626 00:35:54,403 --> 00:35:57,447 It's huge when you see it up close and personal like that. 627 00:35:57,448 --> 00:35:58,740 Majestic creature. 628 00:35:58,741 --> 00:36:00,825 But I just was wondering... 629 00:36:00,826 --> 00:36:05,580 I throw myself in front of the snake to kind of protect Claire's character, 630 00:36:05,581 --> 00:36:06,831 - right? - Correct. 631 00:36:06,832 --> 00:36:10,670 Is there any value in not doing that? 632 00:36:11,170 --> 00:36:12,462 What? No. 633 00:36:12,463 --> 00:36:15,465 - No, no, he sacrifices himself for her. - Yeah. Of course. 634 00:36:15,466 --> 00:36:17,884 - It caps his arc. It's so important. - Right. Right. 635 00:36:17,885 --> 00:36:21,096 - And also, dude, it's totally safe. - Yeah. 636 00:36:21,097 --> 00:36:23,932 - Santiago has Heitor under control. - Okay. 637 00:36:23,933 --> 00:36:27,102 - You've got nothing to worry about. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah... 638 00:36:27,103 --> 00:36:29,145 - We're good. You're good. - Yeah. Okay. 639 00:36:29,146 --> 00:36:30,939 - Okay. - All right, let's do this. 640 00:36:30,940 --> 00:36:32,316 All right, take it from the top. 641 00:36:34,068 --> 00:36:35,111 Back to one. 642 00:36:36,279 --> 00:36:39,407 Santiago, Heitor? Action! 643 00:36:40,491 --> 00:36:41,492 Go! 644 00:36:42,493 --> 00:36:45,495 I'm not leaving! Not without you, Derek. 645 00:36:45,496 --> 00:36:48,623 This thing's got me. The world's depending on you. 646 00:36:48,624 --> 00:36:50,667 I'm depending on you. 647 00:36:50,668 --> 00:36:53,420 Goddamn it! I love you, Derek van Hoyle! 648 00:36:53,421 --> 00:36:55,131 It's just-- I can't-- 649 00:36:56,340 --> 00:36:59,467 - Put your face right up next to the snake. - I don't like this. 650 00:36:59,468 --> 00:37:01,803 - I don't want to do it anymore. - Get a tiny bit closer. 651 00:37:01,804 --> 00:37:03,638 Get closer. He's friendly. 652 00:37:03,639 --> 00:37:06,474 - I think you got it, dude! - No, I don't quite have it! 653 00:37:06,475 --> 00:37:09,019 - Doug, you got the shot! You got the shot! - Hold it! Just a couple more beats. 654 00:37:09,020 --> 00:37:11,354 This is gold. Just give me one more second. 655 00:37:11,355 --> 00:37:13,565 One inch closer to your face. 656 00:37:13,566 --> 00:37:15,401 Get it right up in there! 657 00:37:15,985 --> 00:37:18,196 You're a hero! No! 658 00:37:19,238 --> 00:37:20,448 No! 659 00:37:39,550 --> 00:37:42,929 Oh, shit. 660 00:37:47,141 --> 00:37:49,810 I know you think this is strange. 661 00:37:51,604 --> 00:37:54,941 A grown man getting emotional over some dead snake. 662 00:37:55,441 --> 00:37:56,526 Jesus. 663 00:37:57,068 --> 00:37:59,110 But I loved him, 664 00:37:59,111 --> 00:38:02,114 and he loved me back, whatever way he could. 665 00:38:05,493 --> 00:38:08,204 God. No! 666 00:38:09,288 --> 00:38:10,957 Why is Kenny crying? 667 00:38:14,669 --> 00:38:17,462 Hey. I don't want you here. Not for this! 668 00:38:17,463 --> 00:38:19,089 He tried to murder me. 669 00:38:19,090 --> 00:38:20,173 - Griff? - What? 670 00:38:20,174 --> 00:38:22,926 - Let the man grieve. - You murdered my friend. 671 00:38:22,927 --> 00:38:24,302 Just get out of my face. 672 00:38:24,303 --> 00:38:27,347 - What... Where am I supposed to go? - Griff! Go! Just move! 673 00:38:27,348 --> 00:38:28,349 Fine! 674 00:38:49,620 --> 00:38:54,709 Go in peace, my friend 675 00:38:57,086 --> 00:39:02,591 May the divine snakes welcome you 676 00:39:02,592 --> 00:39:06,095 My dear friend 677 00:39:06,804 --> 00:39:10,390 - Snakedy snake - Snakedy snake, yeah 678 00:39:10,391 --> 00:39:13,935 Snakedy snake 679 00:39:13,936 --> 00:39:17,814 May the divine snakes 680 00:39:17,815 --> 00:39:22,278 Welcome you, welcome you... 681 00:39:22,987 --> 00:39:24,530 What do you see? 682 00:39:25,698 --> 00:39:28,659 They're doing some sort of weird snake funeral. 683 00:39:29,452 --> 00:39:31,495 Snake funeral? 684 00:39:55,811 --> 00:39:59,023 Sorry, I thought I heard something. 685 00:40:20,753 --> 00:40:21,796 Timo? 686 00:40:23,840 --> 00:40:24,924 Timo! 687 00:40:38,855 --> 00:40:41,857 - No. Not you. No. Just-- - I know, I'm sorry... I don't mean-- 688 00:40:41,858 --> 00:40:44,359 - I'm not trying to disturb you. - Just leave me alone. 689 00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:45,902 I'm sorry for your loss. 690 00:40:45,903 --> 00:40:48,822 I know you don't believe me, but it's true. I really am. 691 00:40:48,823 --> 00:40:53,077 A friend of mine died once too, and it hurts. 692 00:40:54,996 --> 00:40:55,997 Was it a snake? 693 00:40:56,581 --> 00:40:57,832 Was it a snake? 694 00:40:59,333 --> 00:41:00,625 No. 695 00:41:00,626 --> 00:41:04,547 It was just a... human person. 696 00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:07,300 Yeah, still sad, right? 697 00:41:08,676 --> 00:41:11,846 Totally. Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. 698 00:41:12,889 --> 00:41:13,890 Beer? 699 00:41:14,765 --> 00:41:18,768 Well, I have my pills here, but, yeah. Let's mix it up. 700 00:41:18,769 --> 00:41:23,274 A few commercials, TV. Did a few episodes of S.W.A.T. 701 00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:25,483 - S.W.A.T.? - Yeah. 702 00:41:25,484 --> 00:41:26,568 I like that one. 703 00:41:26,569 --> 00:41:30,989 I swear, I even had the last line-- Thanks. 704 00:41:30,990 --> 00:41:32,407 The last-- Thanks. 705 00:41:32,408 --> 00:41:34,868 - Last line of season three. - So, what happened? 706 00:41:34,869 --> 00:41:37,954 Well, the producers decided that they didn't really need that character, 707 00:41:37,955 --> 00:41:39,457 so they got rid of me. 708 00:41:40,583 --> 00:41:44,003 I mean, it's only been going about eight or nine more seasons. 709 00:41:45,463 --> 00:41:46,506 They don't deserve you. 710 00:41:47,381 --> 00:41:48,633 Yeah, you're a star. 711 00:41:51,010 --> 00:41:53,513 - Thank you. - Yeah. You've been in movies? 712 00:41:54,096 --> 00:41:57,098 - I'm in an industrial... - You know what movie I like? 713 00:41:57,099 --> 00:41:59,644 - What? - The Legend of Bagger Vance. 714 00:42:00,853 --> 00:42:04,105 - You should do a movie like that. - Man, I wish. 715 00:42:04,106 --> 00:42:04,941 Yeah. 716 00:42:06,567 --> 00:42:09,152 - I like you. - I like you too. 717 00:42:09,153 --> 00:42:10,445 - You know what? - What? 718 00:42:10,446 --> 00:42:13,615 I'll get a new snake for your movie now. 719 00:42:13,616 --> 00:42:14,866 - Really? - Yes. 720 00:42:14,867 --> 00:42:16,952 Oh, my God. Thank you so much. 721 00:42:16,953 --> 00:42:19,038 Yeah. You come with me, of course. 722 00:42:20,540 --> 00:42:21,374 What? 723 00:42:23,709 --> 00:42:27,338 Should we be in here? Maybe we should head back. 724 00:42:32,385 --> 00:42:35,012 What was that? What was that? 725 00:42:37,431 --> 00:42:38,266 Listen. 726 00:42:39,392 --> 00:42:40,726 There are snakes around here. 727 00:42:41,227 --> 00:42:42,353 I can feel it. 728 00:42:43,604 --> 00:42:44,772 What does it feel like? 729 00:42:45,690 --> 00:42:48,733 I don't know. It's just very snaky. 730 00:42:48,734 --> 00:42:50,611 What's-- It's snaky? 731 00:42:58,160 --> 00:43:01,455 They hear from vibrations on the ground. 732 00:43:03,583 --> 00:43:05,960 Every step we take, 733 00:43:06,627 --> 00:43:08,921 drawing them closer. 734 00:43:10,256 --> 00:43:12,633 And when the jungle goes quiet... 735 00:43:16,179 --> 00:43:18,181 that's when you know they're close. 736 00:43:25,938 --> 00:43:27,064 Yeah. 737 00:43:34,989 --> 00:43:38,033 Hey, maybe we should go back to the boat, huh? 738 00:43:38,034 --> 00:43:40,494 Think it'd be a good idea to go back to the boat. Let's go back to the boat. 739 00:43:42,246 --> 00:43:43,456 Santiago. 740 00:43:44,248 --> 00:43:45,291 Santiago. 741 00:43:46,667 --> 00:43:47,793 Santiago! 742 00:43:52,006 --> 00:43:53,007 Nope. 743 00:44:16,030 --> 00:44:17,532 Where are you? 744 00:44:35,174 --> 00:44:38,009 Hey. Have you seen Santiago? I don't think he's come back. 745 00:44:38,010 --> 00:44:42,097 - Back? From what? - We went out to go get a new snake. We-- 746 00:44:42,098 --> 00:44:44,683 You went to find a snake in the middle of the night? 747 00:44:44,684 --> 00:44:47,018 Yeah, we need one for the movie. It was dark. We got separated. 748 00:44:47,019 --> 00:44:48,186 It was crazy out there. 749 00:44:48,187 --> 00:44:49,688 - Griff, Griff, Griff, Griff. - What? 750 00:44:49,689 --> 00:44:52,858 You went out in the middle of the night to find a juicy snake in the jungle? 751 00:44:52,859 --> 00:44:54,485 You know what that's called? 752 00:44:55,528 --> 00:44:56,529 Producing. 753 00:44:57,530 --> 00:45:00,115 - Really? - I guarantee he will be back 754 00:45:00,116 --> 00:45:04,953 with a giant snake, and you and I are making movies. 755 00:45:04,954 --> 00:45:07,539 You're right. Santiago's a pro. He'll be fine. 756 00:45:07,540 --> 00:45:09,876 If he's not back soon, we'll go look for him. 757 00:45:32,648 --> 00:45:35,359 Thank you very much, Santiago. 758 00:45:38,863 --> 00:45:41,239 Guys, it's been over an hour. I have to go find him. 759 00:45:41,240 --> 00:45:42,908 Well, you're not going alone. 760 00:45:42,909 --> 00:45:45,077 Yeah, we're definitely coming with you. It's safer that way. 761 00:45:45,578 --> 00:45:47,413 Have you guys tried this thing? 762 00:45:47,955 --> 00:45:53,669 It's like a warm bowl of soup but... but in chair form. 763 00:45:54,337 --> 00:45:55,755 Yeah, man. Chairs. 764 00:45:56,631 --> 00:45:58,174 They, like, hold you, man. 765 00:45:58,925 --> 00:46:01,260 They literally have arms, right? 766 00:46:03,596 --> 00:46:04,722 Wow. 767 00:46:05,348 --> 00:46:07,141 Like when your parents are gone... 768 00:46:10,353 --> 00:46:12,104 we still have chairs, you know? 769 00:46:14,023 --> 00:46:16,316 What the hell are you talking about? 770 00:46:16,317 --> 00:46:18,235 Let's go find Santiago. 771 00:46:18,236 --> 00:46:20,195 Let's get a snake for our snake movie. 772 00:46:20,196 --> 00:46:22,281 Yeah, Santiago! Let's go! 773 00:46:29,789 --> 00:46:33,084 Hey, what direction are we headed in? 774 00:46:35,503 --> 00:46:36,712 Like, that way. 775 00:46:37,255 --> 00:46:39,881 Wait. Kenny, are you high right now? 776 00:46:39,882 --> 00:46:42,008 Yeah, but I'm good. I already peaked. 777 00:46:42,009 --> 00:46:43,385 Jesus Christ, Kenny. 778 00:46:43,386 --> 00:46:44,887 We're completely lost. 779 00:46:47,473 --> 00:46:49,809 Wait. You guys, this way. 780 00:46:50,393 --> 00:46:52,186 It looks like an old camper van. 781 00:47:09,745 --> 00:47:11,288 Ana is not on the boat. 782 00:47:11,289 --> 00:47:14,833 I need you to search the area. 783 00:47:14,834 --> 00:47:17,252 The men are scared to go deeper into the jungle. 784 00:47:17,253 --> 00:47:19,547 I don't care, we have to find her. 785 00:47:24,635 --> 00:47:25,927 What is that? 786 00:47:25,928 --> 00:47:28,555 Maybe Santiago's sleeping in there. 787 00:47:28,556 --> 00:47:29,557 Hola. 788 00:47:34,312 --> 00:47:37,273 Looks totally abandoned. Anybody home? 789 00:47:43,404 --> 00:47:45,030 Maybe some food and water. 790 00:47:45,031 --> 00:47:46,489 Yeah. We could stay here. 791 00:47:46,490 --> 00:47:47,617 At least tonight. 792 00:47:52,705 --> 00:47:56,125 Oh, man, there's gotta be snacks in here. 793 00:48:25,071 --> 00:48:26,321 Oh, my God. 794 00:48:26,322 --> 00:48:27,447 - Oh, God. - Santiago! 795 00:48:27,448 --> 00:48:28,658 Oh, God. 796 00:48:29,325 --> 00:48:30,326 Dang! 797 00:48:31,327 --> 00:48:32,994 That's where that guy went! 798 00:48:32,995 --> 00:48:34,830 Oh, my God. What is out there? 799 00:48:45,925 --> 00:48:47,884 - We gotta go now! - Okay. Go, go, go. 800 00:48:47,885 --> 00:48:49,803 - Let's get out of here. - Let's go, let's go. 801 00:48:49,804 --> 00:48:51,972 - We can't let it crush the van. - Crush the van? 802 00:48:51,973 --> 00:48:53,723 - It's not working. - What? 803 00:48:53,724 --> 00:48:54,808 - It's not-- - Damn it! 804 00:48:54,809 --> 00:48:56,560 - It's a camper van, probably! - Oh, God! 805 00:48:56,561 --> 00:48:58,770 It's got a split-charge battery. 806 00:48:58,771 --> 00:49:01,231 The relay probably popped off. It's underneath the hood. 807 00:49:01,232 --> 00:49:02,649 Kenny, can you fix it? 808 00:49:02,650 --> 00:49:05,026 Usually I could fix it, yes, but I'm having-- 809 00:49:05,027 --> 00:49:08,238 I'm still having some visual problems because of the... 810 00:49:08,239 --> 00:49:09,739 You did it to me again. 811 00:49:09,740 --> 00:49:14,452 You did it on the wedding video and now you're wasted off your ass again. 812 00:49:14,453 --> 00:49:16,454 I'm really sorry, boss. 813 00:49:16,455 --> 00:49:19,749 Buffalo sober. You're Buffalo sober. 814 00:49:19,750 --> 00:49:20,834 Do you have any more? 815 00:49:20,835 --> 00:49:23,044 Griff, please can you fix it? 816 00:49:23,045 --> 00:49:25,046 I think I'm better suited to be our wheel man. 817 00:49:25,047 --> 00:49:27,174 What are you talking about? I've always been a better driver than you. 818 00:49:27,175 --> 00:49:28,216 No, you've been a safer driver. 819 00:49:28,217 --> 00:49:30,385 I passed the driver's test on my first try. 820 00:49:30,386 --> 00:49:31,803 You took three times. 821 00:49:31,804 --> 00:49:33,305 Yeah, but that was 'cause of yield. 822 00:49:33,306 --> 00:49:35,098 I didn't know-- Now I know what that is. 823 00:49:35,099 --> 00:49:37,310 Oh, my God. We're gonna die. 824 00:49:39,478 --> 00:49:40,521 Sorry. 825 00:49:42,315 --> 00:49:43,357 I'll just fix it. 826 00:51:00,059 --> 00:51:01,435 - Doug! - Go, go, go! 827 00:51:02,228 --> 00:51:03,813 Let me get up. Hey, wait! Stop! Stop! 828 00:51:04,313 --> 00:51:06,691 Griff, where are you going? Don't leave without me! 829 00:51:09,819 --> 00:51:10,987 Oh, shit! 830 00:51:13,823 --> 00:51:15,031 You saw it, right? 831 00:51:15,032 --> 00:51:16,783 What was that? They're not supposed to get that big. 832 00:51:16,784 --> 00:51:18,911 Oh, God. It was like a dinosaur. 833 00:51:23,916 --> 00:51:24,917 Hey! 834 00:51:27,753 --> 00:51:29,713 Hey, maybe we can ask these guys for help. 835 00:51:29,714 --> 00:51:30,630 - Hey! - Hey! 836 00:51:30,631 --> 00:51:32,966 - We have to stop. - Do not stop the car. 837 00:51:32,967 --> 00:51:34,342 Ana, what is going on? 838 00:51:34,343 --> 00:51:37,304 They're illegal gold miners who patrol the jungles around here. 839 00:51:37,305 --> 00:51:38,763 These guys are dangerous. 840 00:51:38,764 --> 00:51:41,683 They'll kill anyone who crosses into their territory. 841 00:51:41,684 --> 00:51:43,895 - Oh, shit. They're trying to kill us. - Fuck! 842 00:51:44,687 --> 00:51:46,272 Why are they shooting at us? 843 00:51:48,065 --> 00:51:49,734 Griff, can't you drive any faster. 844 00:51:53,154 --> 00:51:54,405 Ana, what are you doing? 845 00:51:58,409 --> 00:52:00,912 - Kenny, are you getting this? - Yes! 846 00:52:02,246 --> 00:52:03,581 Keep rolling! 847 00:52:06,709 --> 00:52:08,961 Griff, faster. 848 00:52:12,215 --> 00:52:13,591 Only one left. 849 00:52:37,198 --> 00:52:39,241 - Where is she? - Oh, my God. 850 00:52:39,242 --> 00:52:40,284 Where is she? 851 00:52:43,371 --> 00:52:45,288 Who? Who do... Who do you mean? 852 00:52:45,289 --> 00:52:46,873 I know there's someone else here. 853 00:52:46,874 --> 00:52:49,585 So, where is she-- 854 00:52:54,465 --> 00:52:55,466 Let's go, come on. 855 00:52:56,008 --> 00:52:57,134 We gotta go. Fast. 856 00:52:59,178 --> 00:53:01,179 Look, I can get you guys out of here. 857 00:53:01,180 --> 00:53:03,307 All we need to do is keep heading north. 858 00:53:03,808 --> 00:53:07,102 There's a small airport about a day and a half from here. 859 00:53:07,103 --> 00:53:08,895 You can get us home? 860 00:53:08,896 --> 00:53:10,605 - Yes. - Get us home. 861 00:53:10,606 --> 00:53:11,899 I think we gotta call it. 862 00:53:12,483 --> 00:53:15,236 Man, we've got such good stuff, and we're so close. 863 00:53:15,736 --> 00:53:18,864 Really? We're going home? 864 00:53:18,865 --> 00:53:19,948 Buddy, I know. 865 00:53:19,949 --> 00:53:22,534 I don't wanna go home empty-handed either. 866 00:53:22,535 --> 00:53:25,246 But we came out here to make Anaconda, 867 00:53:25,746 --> 00:53:26,956 and now we're in it. 868 00:53:30,501 --> 00:53:31,544 Yeah. 869 00:53:35,339 --> 00:53:36,465 I'm sorry. 870 00:54:15,671 --> 00:54:18,924 Guys, emergency meeting. 871 00:54:18,925 --> 00:54:20,926 Cast and crew only. Kenny, sit down. 872 00:54:20,927 --> 00:54:22,761 - What is that? - New pages. 873 00:54:22,762 --> 00:54:24,554 We have some time before the next port 874 00:54:24,555 --> 00:54:28,934 and I had an idea last night that I think is just too damn good not to shoot. 875 00:54:28,935 --> 00:54:31,728 Doug, everybody's pretty burnt, man. 876 00:54:31,729 --> 00:54:33,980 Just hear me out. I'm begging you please, Kenny. 877 00:54:33,981 --> 00:54:36,066 - All right. Sorry, boss. - Thank you. 878 00:54:36,067 --> 00:54:39,027 What if you two, on your way to find the anaconda, 879 00:54:39,028 --> 00:54:42,114 ran into a total badass on an incredible quest? 880 00:54:43,157 --> 00:54:44,407 That's interesting. 881 00:54:44,408 --> 00:54:47,911 Let me guess, to expose illegal gold miners? 882 00:54:47,912 --> 00:54:48,828 Bingo. 883 00:54:48,829 --> 00:54:50,956 - Raises the stakes. - Exactly. 884 00:54:50,957 --> 00:54:52,958 And while they're hunting down this mythical snake, 885 00:54:52,959 --> 00:54:55,044 they actually end up fighting the real villain. 886 00:54:55,628 --> 00:54:56,711 An even bigger snake. 887 00:54:56,712 --> 00:54:59,256 - Man. - Oh, yeah. Yes. 888 00:54:59,257 --> 00:55:00,549 Man. 889 00:55:00,550 --> 00:55:01,968 I like this. 890 00:55:02,593 --> 00:55:03,593 This is good. 891 00:55:03,594 --> 00:55:06,764 And if we add this element, it does make the movie much bigger. 892 00:55:07,265 --> 00:55:09,725 Like, now, it's about something. 893 00:55:11,853 --> 00:55:12,770 Themes. 894 00:55:13,396 --> 00:55:14,522 Themes. 895 00:55:21,946 --> 00:55:23,238 Yeah. 896 00:55:23,239 --> 00:55:25,115 Okay. You know what, guys? 897 00:55:25,116 --> 00:55:27,702 I didn't wanna say anything before, but... 898 00:55:29,871 --> 00:55:31,581 this thing might be an Awards play. 899 00:55:33,416 --> 00:55:36,376 I mean, the Academy loves social horror. 900 00:55:36,377 --> 00:55:37,461 - Right? - Yeah. 901 00:55:38,880 --> 00:55:42,508 Dude, you could be the white Jordan Peele. 902 00:55:43,551 --> 00:55:45,261 I was thinking the same thing. 903 00:55:48,598 --> 00:55:50,308 We've been through so much, you guys. 904 00:55:50,933 --> 00:55:52,643 Let's finish this movie. 905 00:55:54,937 --> 00:55:56,354 I'm in. 906 00:55:56,355 --> 00:55:58,065 - Let's do it. - Yeah. 907 00:55:58,608 --> 00:56:02,987 Who are you gonna get to play this new, awesome character? 908 00:56:10,244 --> 00:56:12,287 And cut. Yes! 909 00:56:12,288 --> 00:56:13,830 - Was it good? - That's what I'm talking about. 910 00:56:13,831 --> 00:56:14,748 - Nice. - Yeah. 911 00:56:14,749 --> 00:56:17,125 - You sure you've never acted before? - I swear. 912 00:56:17,126 --> 00:56:18,920 Some of the best acting I've ever seen. 913 00:56:19,545 --> 00:56:22,130 - You're a natural. You're incredible. - Thank you. 914 00:56:22,131 --> 00:56:23,799 Take five. Next up, we got 72. 915 00:56:24,634 --> 00:56:28,094 - Guys, you see what I'm saying? - Yeah. 916 00:56:28,095 --> 00:56:29,763 - She's incredible, right? - Yeah. 917 00:56:29,764 --> 00:56:31,599 Hey, a question, though. 918 00:56:32,517 --> 00:56:36,228 If she saves us, it doesn't really give my character anything to do. 919 00:56:36,229 --> 00:56:37,354 Yeah. 920 00:56:37,355 --> 00:56:41,483 This was supposed to be the moment where my character starts falling for Derek, 921 00:56:41,484 --> 00:56:45,487 so he needs to do something heroic, you know? Unselfish. 922 00:56:45,488 --> 00:56:48,114 I don't know, you guys, this just feels like her moment, 923 00:56:48,115 --> 00:56:50,201 she actually did it in real life. 924 00:56:50,743 --> 00:56:53,370 But good news, I'm gonna shoot all the rest on her 925 00:56:53,371 --> 00:56:55,122 so you guys have the day off. 926 00:56:55,623 --> 00:56:57,041 See you later. 927 00:56:58,125 --> 00:56:59,627 Take the day off. 928 00:57:08,052 --> 00:57:11,763 This is our movie, Griff, and he's just cutting us out. 929 00:57:11,764 --> 00:57:13,682 Yep. Welcome to show business, baby. 930 00:57:13,683 --> 00:57:16,936 You're not in it unless you're getting screwed over by your friends. 931 00:57:18,479 --> 00:57:19,564 Yeah. 932 00:57:21,482 --> 00:57:25,111 You ever wake up and wonder what the hell have I done with my life? 933 00:57:25,903 --> 00:57:28,572 Oh, yeah. Like, every day. 934 00:57:28,573 --> 00:57:31,157 Hey, at least you had the guts to go after what you wanted. 935 00:57:31,158 --> 00:57:33,035 - No. - You think I wanted to go to law school? 936 00:57:33,536 --> 00:57:35,412 What have I got to show for it though? 937 00:57:35,413 --> 00:57:36,496 You know what I have? 938 00:57:36,497 --> 00:57:40,376 I have a terrible apartment and a 74-year-old roommate. 939 00:57:42,128 --> 00:57:45,464 Sometimes I go to Trader Joe's just to feel air conditioning. 940 00:57:47,091 --> 00:57:48,551 You at least have a career. 941 00:57:50,052 --> 00:57:52,054 I mean, what do I have to show for it? 942 00:57:53,264 --> 00:57:56,267 I've got no family. No career. 943 00:57:57,185 --> 00:57:59,102 Never done anything that matters. 944 00:57:59,103 --> 00:58:00,563 No nothing. 945 00:58:02,982 --> 00:58:04,192 It's never too late. 946 00:58:13,492 --> 00:58:15,160 Griff, I know you're in there. 947 00:58:15,161 --> 00:58:16,454 Let's make a movie. 948 00:58:20,958 --> 00:58:22,042 Hola, amigo. 949 00:58:22,043 --> 00:58:24,961 Jesus. Come on, get dressed. We've got a packed day. 950 00:58:24,962 --> 00:58:28,673 What are you talking about? I am dressed. I'm dressed really... very nicely. 951 00:58:28,674 --> 00:58:30,634 All right. Can you just take a cold shower? 952 00:58:30,635 --> 00:58:32,052 We gotta film, like, now. 953 00:58:32,053 --> 00:58:34,055 Here's an idea. You know what you should call the movie? 954 00:58:34,555 --> 00:58:36,599 Ana-conda. Get it? 955 00:58:37,099 --> 00:58:39,059 Ana-conda, 'cause of Ana. 956 00:58:39,060 --> 00:58:41,061 Can you just get in costume? 957 00:58:41,062 --> 00:58:43,523 Man, you know what? You wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for me. 958 00:58:44,023 --> 00:58:45,857 Without me, you'd still be stuck in Buffalo 959 00:58:45,858 --> 00:58:48,152 shooting your bullshit wedding videos. 960 00:58:49,195 --> 00:58:50,111 Films. 961 00:58:50,112 --> 00:58:52,030 Yeah, you can tell yourself that. 962 00:58:52,031 --> 00:58:54,908 My God, you know what? I vouched for you too. 963 00:58:54,909 --> 00:58:57,202 Even the rights holders, they're like, "Who is this guy?" 964 00:58:57,203 --> 00:58:58,788 I said, "Trust me. He's good." 965 00:59:00,748 --> 00:59:01,749 What is that? 966 00:59:05,670 --> 00:59:10,632 Attention, all crew. Let's get prepped for scene 85, location Bravo. 967 00:59:10,633 --> 00:59:12,050 Five minutes. 968 00:59:12,051 --> 00:59:15,220 - Are they making a movie? - Five minutes to arrival. 969 00:59:15,221 --> 00:59:18,515 Excuse me, are you guys shooting a movie? 970 00:59:18,516 --> 00:59:20,643 We're doing a reboot of Anaconda. 971 00:59:21,435 --> 00:59:22,436 Come again? 972 00:59:22,979 --> 00:59:25,731 - A reboot of Anaconda. - Anaconda? 973 00:59:26,232 --> 00:59:28,483 - Like, Ice Cube Anaconda? - Yeah. 974 00:59:28,484 --> 00:59:30,111 Sony is rebooting it. 975 00:59:30,653 --> 00:59:33,072 I know. No new ideas. 976 00:59:47,128 --> 00:59:48,504 That's weird. 977 00:59:50,631 --> 00:59:52,008 So, let me get this straight. 978 00:59:52,633 --> 00:59:55,178 You don't have the rights to Anaconda? 979 00:59:56,387 --> 00:59:57,388 No, well, I... 980 00:59:58,598 --> 00:59:59,891 Not legally. 981 01:00:00,600 --> 01:00:03,603 And you've never owned the rights to Anaconda? 982 01:00:06,480 --> 01:00:08,148 I mean, who owns Anaconda? 983 01:00:08,149 --> 01:00:11,026 Sony. Sony owns Anaconda. 984 01:00:11,027 --> 01:00:12,277 Yeah, no, no, I know. I know. 985 01:00:12,278 --> 01:00:15,280 I mean, like, you know, like, in the larger sense. 986 01:00:15,281 --> 01:00:17,741 Why would you tell us that you had the rights 987 01:00:17,742 --> 01:00:20,327 to the goddamn Anaconda franchise 988 01:00:20,328 --> 01:00:25,207 when you very much don't have the rights to the goddamn Anaconda franchise? 989 01:00:25,208 --> 01:00:28,043 Do we really even need the rights? 990 01:00:28,044 --> 01:00:29,587 Really? I mean, like, who gives a shit? 991 01:00:31,506 --> 01:00:33,256 - About IP? - Yeah. 992 01:00:33,257 --> 01:00:34,800 Literally everyone. 993 01:00:35,468 --> 01:00:38,553 That's what big movies are! That's why we're here! 994 01:00:38,554 --> 01:00:41,181 - You think that's why we're here? - Yes, that's why we're here! 995 01:00:41,182 --> 01:00:42,641 We almost died! 996 01:00:42,642 --> 01:00:46,603 We're out in the middle of the goddamn jungle for a lie! 997 01:00:46,604 --> 01:00:48,147 I had to lie! 998 01:00:49,023 --> 01:00:51,191 I had to lie to you! You wouldn't have come otherwise! 999 01:00:51,192 --> 01:00:53,027 You wouldn't... None of you would have-- 1000 01:00:53,903 --> 01:00:55,862 - Bullshit! - Not bullshit. 1001 01:00:55,863 --> 01:00:58,198 It's why you never came out to LA with me in the first place, 1002 01:00:58,199 --> 01:01:01,243 even though we had a whole plan to work together. 1003 01:01:01,244 --> 01:01:04,247 Your whole life, you've just-- it's been dictated by fear. 1004 01:01:06,123 --> 01:01:07,124 Griff, 1005 01:01:08,751 --> 01:01:09,794 you're fired. 1006 01:01:10,503 --> 01:01:12,171 - What? - You're fired. 1007 01:01:15,216 --> 01:01:16,383 No. No, I'm not. 1008 01:01:16,384 --> 01:01:18,094 You can't fire me. You know why? 1009 01:01:18,845 --> 01:01:20,638 Because I quit already. 1010 01:01:21,597 --> 01:01:22,473 Last night. 1011 01:01:25,852 --> 01:01:27,353 I just didn't tell anybody yet. 1012 01:01:28,479 --> 01:01:29,480 So... 1013 01:01:32,024 --> 01:01:34,610 Too bad for you, I guess, because I already quit. 1014 01:01:49,542 --> 01:01:51,002 Griff, wait! 1015 01:01:51,919 --> 01:01:53,753 Where are you even gonna go? 1016 01:01:53,754 --> 01:01:55,255 To find the Anaconda boat. 1017 01:01:55,256 --> 01:01:56,673 Maybe they can help me get home. 1018 01:01:56,674 --> 01:01:59,009 Just think about this. It's not safe. 1019 01:01:59,010 --> 01:02:00,468 That's a tiny boat. 1020 01:02:00,469 --> 01:02:02,346 There's a giant snake out there. 1021 01:02:05,141 --> 01:02:06,684 Please don't do this. 1022 01:02:09,645 --> 01:02:10,855 Griff. 1023 01:02:53,481 --> 01:02:54,524 J.Lo? 1024 01:02:55,107 --> 01:02:56,192 Ice Cube? 1025 01:02:57,818 --> 01:03:00,862 Jon Voight? Are you in this one? 1026 01:03:00,863 --> 01:03:01,988 Help me! 1027 01:03:01,989 --> 01:03:03,365 Help me, man! Help me! 1028 01:03:03,366 --> 01:03:04,699 - Hey! - Help me! 1029 01:03:04,700 --> 01:03:06,910 - It's okay. It's okay. - Help! Help me! 1030 01:03:06,911 --> 01:03:08,578 - Calm down. I'll come get you. - Oh, my... 1031 01:03:08,579 --> 01:03:10,622 It's okay. You're safe. 1032 01:03:10,623 --> 01:03:11,958 - You're safe. - Oh, thank God. 1033 01:03:12,667 --> 01:03:14,877 Oh, shit! Oh, God! 1034 01:03:20,216 --> 01:03:21,217 Oh, God! 1035 01:03:22,885 --> 01:03:26,055 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1036 01:03:28,683 --> 01:03:29,684 Doug! 1037 01:03:30,184 --> 01:03:32,394 Doug, what's going on? Why have we stopped? 1038 01:03:32,395 --> 01:03:36,356 Well, Ana found a great place to shoot the next scene. 1039 01:03:36,357 --> 01:03:37,732 - To shoot? - The next scene? What? 1040 01:03:37,733 --> 01:03:40,402 Look. Look, okay, I know. Losing Griff was hard, 1041 01:03:40,403 --> 01:03:42,904 but between the four of us, we can finish this film. 1042 01:03:42,905 --> 01:03:44,281 I'm not going home empty-handed. 1043 01:03:44,282 --> 01:03:46,575 Come on, man. Without Griff... 1044 01:03:46,576 --> 01:03:48,201 That's not part of the plan. 1045 01:03:48,202 --> 01:03:51,121 Well, plans change and that's part of filmmaking too. 1046 01:03:51,122 --> 01:03:53,206 No, no, Doug, we have to go back for him. 1047 01:03:53,207 --> 01:03:54,624 - He's not safe out there. - Yeah. 1048 01:03:54,625 --> 01:03:56,376 Ana. We need to turn the boat around. 1049 01:03:56,377 --> 01:03:58,211 We are not turning the boat around. 1050 01:03:58,212 --> 01:04:00,046 Yeah, we're not turning the boat around. 1051 01:04:00,047 --> 01:04:02,465 Everyone off the boat now. 1052 01:04:02,466 --> 01:04:03,342 What's going on? 1053 01:04:05,052 --> 01:04:07,220 Ana, what are you doing? 1054 01:04:07,221 --> 01:04:08,972 This definitely isn't the plan. 1055 01:04:08,973 --> 01:04:10,932 Well, plans change, Doug. 1056 01:04:10,933 --> 01:04:12,476 Isn't that filmmaking? 1057 01:04:13,436 --> 01:04:15,563 And every good film needs a bit of a twist. 1058 01:04:16,272 --> 01:04:19,025 Everyone off the boat now! 1059 01:05:11,369 --> 01:05:12,370 To the dock. 1060 01:05:38,938 --> 01:05:41,231 You're gonna carry these for me back to the boat. Let's go. 1061 01:05:41,232 --> 01:05:42,275 And then what? 1062 01:05:43,317 --> 01:05:44,609 And then you're gonna shoot us? 1063 01:05:44,610 --> 01:05:45,653 Now! 1064 01:05:47,154 --> 01:05:48,321 I'm not going anywhere 1065 01:05:48,322 --> 01:05:50,615 until you tell me what's inside these bags. 1066 01:05:50,616 --> 01:05:52,994 You wanna look at it? Look at it. 1067 01:06:00,668 --> 01:06:02,962 Wait. Is... Is that... 1068 01:06:04,422 --> 01:06:05,505 Gold? 1069 01:06:05,506 --> 01:06:08,466 So you're the miner? You did all of this for money? 1070 01:06:08,467 --> 01:06:09,552 Very quick, Claire. 1071 01:06:11,512 --> 01:06:12,555 No! 1072 01:06:13,389 --> 01:06:15,515 I'm not gonna be part of your sick quest for-- 1073 01:06:15,516 --> 01:06:16,391 Holy shit. 1074 01:06:16,392 --> 01:06:17,268 Drop it. 1075 01:06:17,768 --> 01:06:18,936 Drop the gun. 1076 01:06:19,520 --> 01:06:20,771 The gun. 1077 01:06:22,607 --> 01:06:23,357 Now! 1078 01:06:23,482 --> 01:06:24,650 Calm down. 1079 01:06:28,571 --> 01:06:30,031 And you, don't move! 1080 01:06:34,410 --> 01:06:35,660 I'm with the government. 1081 01:06:35,661 --> 01:06:37,704 We track illegal gold miners. 1082 01:06:37,705 --> 01:06:40,708 And Ana here runs one of the biggest rings in Brazil. 1083 01:06:41,709 --> 01:06:43,627 This gold can change your life. 1084 01:06:43,628 --> 01:06:45,504 You think I care about gold? 1085 01:06:45,505 --> 01:06:46,755 Don't trust anything she says. 1086 01:06:46,756 --> 01:06:48,882 She's a liar. She's a damn liar. 1087 01:06:48,883 --> 01:06:50,592 We're filmmakers from Buffalo. 1088 01:06:50,593 --> 01:06:53,094 We're working on a spiritual sequel to Anaconda, 1089 01:06:53,095 --> 01:06:55,805 and I don't know if she mentioned that, but it's not just a reboot, 1090 01:06:55,806 --> 01:06:57,682 and I kicked out my friend who had the lead, 1091 01:06:57,683 --> 01:06:59,976 and I gave her a juicy-ass role, 1092 01:06:59,977 --> 01:07:01,228 - and this is how she treats-- - Really juicy! 1093 01:07:01,229 --> 01:07:03,939 Shut up! I don't know what you're talking about, man. 1094 01:07:03,940 --> 01:07:05,982 Off-topic. Go, arrest her. 1095 01:07:05,983 --> 01:07:07,068 Thank God. 1096 01:07:20,373 --> 01:07:21,499 Oh, my God! 1097 01:07:23,751 --> 01:07:25,378 Who shot me? 1098 01:07:26,838 --> 01:07:28,380 That'd be me, asshole. 1099 01:07:28,381 --> 01:07:31,049 Griff, no. He was a good guy. 1100 01:07:31,050 --> 01:07:33,009 - I'm a good guy. - He's a cop. 1101 01:07:33,010 --> 01:07:34,053 Look, I don't-- What? 1102 01:07:35,680 --> 01:07:37,138 I'm a good guy. 1103 01:07:37,139 --> 01:07:39,684 Drop it. On your knees now, the four of you, facing the water. 1104 01:07:41,519 --> 01:07:42,979 - Wait. I-- - Now. 1105 01:07:57,201 --> 01:07:59,995 No, no, Ana. Don't do this. 1106 01:07:59,996 --> 01:08:01,788 You too, Claire. On your knees, now. 1107 01:08:01,789 --> 01:08:03,457 You don't have to be this person. 1108 01:08:04,709 --> 01:08:08,004 I have children at home. They're 10 and 13. 1109 01:08:08,504 --> 01:08:09,505 Please. 1110 01:08:10,047 --> 01:08:11,339 Please. 1111 01:08:11,340 --> 01:08:13,341 Think about what you're doing to my kids. 1112 01:08:13,342 --> 01:08:15,344 Just shut your mouth. Turn around now. 1113 01:08:23,227 --> 01:08:24,395 On your knees. 1114 01:08:25,188 --> 01:08:26,397 Now! 1115 01:08:28,482 --> 01:08:30,442 - Toma! - Toma! 1116 01:08:30,443 --> 01:08:32,612 Eat that shit! Nice! 1117 01:08:33,112 --> 01:08:35,865 For the record, that's how you headbutt, bitch! 1118 01:08:40,411 --> 01:08:41,495 You won't do it. 1119 01:08:41,996 --> 01:08:43,830 You don't have the balls. I know you, Claire. 1120 01:08:43,831 --> 01:08:44,874 You don't know me. 1121 01:08:45,374 --> 01:08:46,584 I don't even have kids. 1122 01:08:54,216 --> 01:08:55,426 Jesus Christ! 1123 01:09:01,765 --> 01:09:04,684 - A snake! - No. No, wait. Wait. 1124 01:09:04,685 --> 01:09:06,269 I think the boat is back that way! 1125 01:09:06,270 --> 01:09:08,396 Yeah, but then so is the snake. We can't go that way! 1126 01:09:08,397 --> 01:09:10,898 We gotta take this trail and get to the high ground. 1127 01:09:10,899 --> 01:09:13,151 - Wait. What's that? - What? 1128 01:09:13,152 --> 01:09:14,653 What? 1129 01:09:14,654 --> 01:09:15,654 Shit! 1130 01:09:16,322 --> 01:09:17,656 Oh, my God. 1131 01:09:17,657 --> 01:09:19,824 - Did it bite you? - Yeah, you know what, I think it bit me. 1132 01:09:19,825 --> 01:09:21,785 - I think it got me. - Dougie, I know it hurts, 1133 01:09:21,786 --> 01:09:24,871 but we gotta get out of here now because the snake is out there! 1134 01:09:24,872 --> 01:09:27,916 I'm sorry, I can't move. My leg is freaking out. 1135 01:09:27,917 --> 01:09:29,669 What are we gonna do? 1136 01:09:30,211 --> 01:09:31,754 We're gonna have to piss on you, man. 1137 01:09:32,337 --> 01:09:35,130 - Huh? - On the bite. It's the only way. 1138 01:09:35,131 --> 01:09:36,675 I thought that was just jellyfish. 1139 01:09:36,676 --> 01:09:39,344 No, no, no, no. It's all animals. 1140 01:09:39,345 --> 01:09:40,887 - Are you sure? - Positive. 1141 01:09:40,888 --> 01:09:43,014 Someone's gotta piss. I need one of your pisses. 1142 01:09:43,015 --> 01:09:45,141 I'd love to be able to help out, but I'm just-- 1143 01:09:45,142 --> 01:09:48,353 I am drained, tapped, bone-dry. 1144 01:09:48,354 --> 01:09:50,021 Claire, you wanna take care of this? 1145 01:09:50,022 --> 01:09:51,523 I'm wearing a onesie. 1146 01:09:51,524 --> 01:09:54,067 Kenny, we don't have time to argue about this. You're up. 1147 01:09:54,068 --> 01:09:55,778 You know this isn't possible. 1148 01:09:56,404 --> 01:09:57,529 Why not? 1149 01:09:57,530 --> 01:09:58,781 Because he's... 1150 01:09:59,824 --> 01:10:00,907 Pee shy. 1151 01:10:00,908 --> 01:10:03,118 - Pee shy? - I have urinary stage fright. 1152 01:10:03,119 --> 01:10:06,037 I haven't been able to pee in public in 35 years. 1153 01:10:06,038 --> 01:10:07,706 My life sucks! 1154 01:10:07,707 --> 01:10:08,790 You can do this. 1155 01:10:08,791 --> 01:10:10,293 You have to do this. 1156 01:10:10,918 --> 01:10:12,377 Whiz on me. 1157 01:10:12,378 --> 01:10:14,129 - You got it, buddy. - Okay. 1158 01:10:14,130 --> 01:10:17,048 - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah. 1159 01:10:17,049 --> 01:10:18,341 - You can do it. - You can do it. 1160 01:10:18,342 --> 01:10:20,802 - Let it flow. - Let it flow. Yeah. 1161 01:10:20,803 --> 01:10:23,138 Just piss on me. Come on. Whiz on me. 1162 01:10:23,139 --> 01:10:24,891 Whiz on me. Do it. Whiz on me. 1163 01:10:25,391 --> 01:10:27,560 You... You don't think I want to? 1164 01:10:28,686 --> 01:10:30,771 I would love to piss all over you, man. 1165 01:10:31,480 --> 01:10:33,106 But it's not in the cards! 1166 01:10:33,107 --> 01:10:35,400 - Whiz on me. Now. - I can't. I'm trying. 1167 01:10:35,401 --> 01:10:38,111 - You can do it! Whiz on me! - I'm trying my hardest! 1168 01:10:38,112 --> 01:10:41,948 - Do it, Ken! Do it, Ken. Do it. Do it. - That is an order! Whiz on me now! 1169 01:10:41,949 --> 01:10:44,284 Okay! Okay. 1170 01:10:44,285 --> 01:10:46,287 You got it, buddy. You do it. 1171 01:10:46,996 --> 01:10:49,414 - There's one more problem. - What? 1172 01:10:49,415 --> 01:10:51,416 I haven't told you about this. 1173 01:10:51,417 --> 01:10:53,210 I can only pee sitting down. 1174 01:10:53,211 --> 01:10:54,753 Jesus Christ! 1175 01:10:54,754 --> 01:10:56,255 I need a chair. 1176 01:10:58,466 --> 01:11:00,134 Come on, come on, come on. 1177 01:11:00,927 --> 01:11:02,385 Come on, buddy. 1178 01:11:02,386 --> 01:11:04,054 Come on, Kenny. Come on, come on. 1179 01:11:04,055 --> 01:11:05,305 Just do it. Do it! 1180 01:11:05,306 --> 01:11:06,932 - Come on, buddy. - Do it. 1181 01:11:06,933 --> 01:11:08,059 Come on, buddy. 1182 01:11:15,024 --> 01:11:17,400 - Yeah! - Yeah! 1183 01:11:17,401 --> 01:11:19,945 - Yes! Yes! Yes! - Nice! 1184 01:11:19,946 --> 01:11:23,074 - Yes! Yeah! - Yeah! Yeah! 1185 01:11:33,125 --> 01:11:36,838 Yeah! 1186 01:11:54,897 --> 01:11:59,110 Griff, I'm sorry about what I said before on the boat. 1187 01:11:59,777 --> 01:12:05,116 The truth is, I've been jealous of you for a long, long time. 1188 01:12:05,658 --> 01:12:06,575 Jealous? 1189 01:12:06,576 --> 01:12:08,869 For having the balls to do what I couldn't. 1190 01:12:08,870 --> 01:12:10,328 For going after what you wanted. 1191 01:12:10,329 --> 01:12:12,415 Going to LA and putting yourself on the-- 1192 01:12:15,334 --> 01:12:16,335 Oh, my God! 1193 01:12:16,460 --> 01:12:18,170 - Oh, shit! - Doug! 1194 01:12:18,171 --> 01:12:19,380 Oh, my God! 1195 01:12:21,257 --> 01:12:23,176 We have to go after him! 1196 01:12:23,718 --> 01:12:25,928 - We gotta get out of here. - We do not have a choice. Come on. 1197 01:12:36,939 --> 01:12:37,940 Griff. 1198 01:12:40,318 --> 01:12:41,319 Griff. 1199 01:12:44,447 --> 01:12:45,531 What did I do? 1200 01:12:46,699 --> 01:12:49,576 I tricked him into coming here, and now he's dead. 1201 01:12:49,577 --> 01:12:53,163 No. No. We all chose to be here. 1202 01:12:53,164 --> 01:12:54,373 I wish it was me. 1203 01:12:55,291 --> 01:12:56,500 It should be me. 1204 01:12:56,501 --> 01:12:59,085 This is not your fault, and we have to keep going. 1205 01:12:59,086 --> 01:13:03,299 Hey, guys, I think I found out which way we should go. 1206 01:13:17,563 --> 01:13:18,564 Hey. 1207 01:13:21,526 --> 01:13:22,609 It's a... 1208 01:13:22,610 --> 01:13:24,110 It's a big open field. 1209 01:13:24,111 --> 01:13:26,488 We gotta get across it to get to the boat. 1210 01:13:26,489 --> 01:13:27,948 But we can't just run across. 1211 01:13:27,949 --> 01:13:29,158 It's too exposed. 1212 01:13:29,825 --> 01:13:31,327 The snake could come from anywhere. 1213 01:13:32,703 --> 01:13:34,664 Maybe we can create a distraction. 1214 01:13:35,790 --> 01:13:39,001 Yeah, yeah, maybe, but, I mean, how do we do that? 1215 01:13:40,461 --> 01:13:42,338 I mean, it's gonna be so... What? 1216 01:13:56,519 --> 01:13:57,895 It's here. 1217 01:14:26,799 --> 01:14:27,800 What? 1218 01:14:28,676 --> 01:14:29,759 What? 1219 01:14:29,760 --> 01:14:32,763 Oh, my God. Doug. Doug, no. 1220 01:14:34,265 --> 01:14:35,808 Dougie. Dougie. 1221 01:14:36,309 --> 01:14:38,102 - Come on, man. - Is he... 1222 01:14:39,645 --> 01:14:41,105 Jesus Christ. 1223 01:14:45,902 --> 01:14:47,653 Wait. Wait. 1224 01:14:51,240 --> 01:14:53,868 Maybe Doug is the distraction. 1225 01:14:55,995 --> 01:14:57,078 How? 1226 01:14:57,079 --> 01:14:59,247 I know this is horrible, okay? 1227 01:14:59,248 --> 01:15:02,584 But if we can drag Doug out into the field, 1228 01:15:02,585 --> 01:15:03,961 prop him up 1229 01:15:04,670 --> 01:15:07,590 and attach the boar to his back 1230 01:15:08,132 --> 01:15:11,886 wouldn't we make it really hard for the snake to swallow him? 1231 01:15:12,845 --> 01:15:16,598 It'll occupy the snake long enough for us to get across the field 1232 01:15:16,599 --> 01:15:17,767 and get back to the boat. 1233 01:15:18,851 --> 01:15:20,728 It's a really smart idea. 1234 01:15:25,983 --> 01:15:27,108 Guys, this is horrible. 1235 01:15:27,109 --> 01:15:29,694 If it meant saving all of us, I'm sure Doug would've wanted this. 1236 01:15:29,695 --> 01:15:31,655 I'm not sure he would've wanted this. 1237 01:15:31,656 --> 01:15:32,614 Wait. 1238 01:15:32,615 --> 01:15:34,324 - We gotta go, guys. - What are you gonna do? 1239 01:15:34,325 --> 01:15:35,368 What are you doing? 1240 01:15:37,119 --> 01:15:39,205 Snakes, they love squirrel meat. 1241 01:15:56,430 --> 01:15:58,558 Wait, the snake is right behind him. 1242 01:16:14,240 --> 01:16:15,324 I can't... 1243 01:16:24,584 --> 01:16:25,835 Oh, shit! 1244 01:16:29,964 --> 01:16:32,132 - He's alive! He's alive! - He's alive! 1245 01:16:32,133 --> 01:16:34,134 - I thought you checked his pulse! - I did! 1246 01:16:34,135 --> 01:16:36,219 Well, you did a shitty job! 1247 01:16:36,220 --> 01:16:37,638 What the fuck? 1248 01:16:38,389 --> 01:16:40,932 - Doug! Watch out! Run! - Doug! Run! 1249 01:16:40,933 --> 01:16:42,726 Come on, Doug, run! 1250 01:16:42,727 --> 01:16:45,395 - Hey! - Run! Faster! 1251 01:16:45,396 --> 01:16:46,563 Hey. 1252 01:16:46,564 --> 01:16:48,565 - Doug, run! - Doug! 1253 01:16:48,566 --> 01:16:49,441 What? 1254 01:16:49,442 --> 01:16:51,484 - He's right behind you! - What? 1255 01:16:51,485 --> 01:16:54,322 - Run, Doug! - Doug! 1256 01:16:55,114 --> 01:16:56,323 Oh, shit! 1257 01:16:56,324 --> 01:16:57,742 Shit, shit. 1258 01:16:58,367 --> 01:17:00,912 Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Shit. 1259 01:17:01,704 --> 01:17:02,954 Oh, shit. 1260 01:17:02,955 --> 01:17:04,039 - Run! - Run! 1261 01:17:04,040 --> 01:17:06,041 - Run, Doug! Run! - Run! 1262 01:17:06,042 --> 01:17:07,459 What the hell is on my back? 1263 01:17:07,460 --> 01:17:09,420 It's a long story! Just run! 1264 01:17:16,928 --> 01:17:18,095 Shit! 1265 01:17:22,975 --> 01:17:25,186 God, help me! Jesus! 1266 01:17:27,730 --> 01:17:29,856 Damn it. This thing's alive! 1267 01:17:29,857 --> 01:17:31,359 This thing's alive! 1268 01:17:32,193 --> 01:17:35,028 It's trying to bite me! 1269 01:17:35,029 --> 01:17:36,697 Doug! Run! 1270 01:17:43,371 --> 01:17:45,705 Holy shit! Get back to the boat! 1271 01:17:45,706 --> 01:17:48,500 Get back to the boat! Go! 1272 01:17:48,501 --> 01:17:51,879 - Boat! Go! Go! Go! - It was right behind me! 1273 01:17:56,175 --> 01:17:58,176 - Okay. All right. All right. - Okay. 1274 01:17:58,177 --> 01:17:59,928 I think we're okay. I think we're okay. 1275 01:17:59,929 --> 01:18:01,012 Oh, God. 1276 01:18:01,013 --> 01:18:02,431 All right. All right. We-- 1277 01:18:03,307 --> 01:18:04,975 What the hell! 1278 01:18:04,976 --> 01:18:06,561 I thought I was dead. 1279 01:18:07,895 --> 01:18:09,146 How you doing, Dougie? 1280 01:18:09,981 --> 01:18:11,231 - I'm okay now. - Good. 1281 01:18:11,232 --> 01:18:12,315 I thought we lost you, man. 1282 01:18:12,316 --> 01:18:13,484 Can I say something? 1283 01:18:14,402 --> 01:18:15,778 I'm sorry. 1284 01:18:16,529 --> 01:18:18,989 I think I got so caught up in wanting to play a hero, 1285 01:18:18,990 --> 01:18:22,075 that I lost sight of what it is that's really important to me. 1286 01:18:22,076 --> 01:18:24,412 And that's just making stuff with you guys again. 1287 01:18:25,246 --> 01:18:27,122 Griff, I feel the exact same way. 1288 01:18:27,123 --> 01:18:28,165 I love you guys. 1289 01:18:28,666 --> 01:18:30,084 I just have one question. 1290 01:18:32,545 --> 01:18:35,715 Whose idea was it to put that dead squirrel in my mouth? 1291 01:18:37,425 --> 01:18:39,801 It was like a group decision. It wasn't-- 1292 01:18:39,802 --> 01:18:42,430 - Really? - Yeah, it wasn't like one person. 1293 01:18:43,139 --> 01:18:45,265 Snakes love squirrel meat. 1294 01:18:45,266 --> 01:18:46,725 I knew it was your idea! 1295 01:18:46,726 --> 01:18:48,143 Guys, come on. We gotta keep moving. 1296 01:18:48,144 --> 01:18:50,563 All right, well, I made a choice and I'm sticking with it. 1297 01:19:10,583 --> 01:19:12,376 Holy shit. 1298 01:19:13,628 --> 01:19:15,129 It's the Anaconda set. 1299 01:19:15,713 --> 01:19:18,007 What happened? It's destroyed. 1300 01:19:26,140 --> 01:19:27,141 Hello? 1301 01:19:28,893 --> 01:19:31,062 Is anyone there? Hello? 1302 01:19:33,856 --> 01:19:35,024 Can you help us? 1303 01:19:37,860 --> 01:19:39,654 What? I... 1304 01:19:44,992 --> 01:19:46,702 What? Again, sorry? 1305 01:19:48,788 --> 01:19:50,206 Behind you! 1306 01:20:14,230 --> 01:20:17,148 Holy shit. Ice Cube? 1307 01:20:17,149 --> 01:20:20,570 Who'd you think it was, Jon Voight? Let's go. 1308 01:20:26,909 --> 01:20:28,535 Let's go, let's go, let's go. Now. 1309 01:20:28,536 --> 01:20:30,663 In here. Get in here, tube socks. 1310 01:20:44,510 --> 01:20:45,636 We're good. 1311 01:20:46,345 --> 01:20:48,096 Hey, are you okay? 1312 01:20:48,097 --> 01:20:51,558 Yeah, I'm all right. The snake tore up the set. 1313 01:20:51,559 --> 01:20:54,477 Everybody scattered. Lamp hit me, I'm down. 1314 01:20:54,478 --> 01:20:57,189 I get up, nobody there. 1315 01:20:57,190 --> 01:21:00,233 - What about J.Lo? - Yeah, and Eric Stoltz? 1316 01:21:00,234 --> 01:21:02,194 Jenny from the block, so she gonna be okay, 1317 01:21:02,195 --> 01:21:04,863 but Eric ain't from the block. 1318 01:21:04,864 --> 01:21:06,574 - Jesus. - Damn it. 1319 01:21:07,116 --> 01:21:11,536 I don't know how we're gonna do it, but we have to kill it before it kills us. 1320 01:21:11,537 --> 01:21:13,246 I'm with that, I'm with that. 1321 01:21:13,247 --> 01:21:15,458 Hey, how were they gonna do it in your script? 1322 01:21:16,834 --> 01:21:20,378 I don't know. The writer never finished the third act. 1323 01:21:20,379 --> 01:21:24,007 What? You guys started shooting before you knew the end? 1324 01:21:24,008 --> 01:21:26,426 Welcome to Hollywood, buttercup. 1325 01:21:26,427 --> 01:21:29,721 That's what they do. They just make it up as they go along. 1326 01:21:29,722 --> 01:21:32,849 What was the general gist? Do you have any idea? Was anything-- 1327 01:21:32,850 --> 01:21:36,603 All I know is they were setting up pyrotechnics all through here. 1328 01:21:36,604 --> 01:21:38,021 Is it still up? 1329 01:21:38,022 --> 01:21:40,607 It's hooked up, but I don't know how to work pyro. 1330 01:21:40,608 --> 01:21:44,445 Kenny, you know how to ignite pyro, right? 1331 01:21:44,987 --> 01:21:46,696 - Not a problem, boss. - Hey, hey. 1332 01:21:46,697 --> 01:21:50,200 I don't know what y'all talking about. I gotta go save J.Lo and Stoltz. 1333 01:21:50,201 --> 01:21:51,326 - Okay. - Really? 1334 01:21:51,327 --> 01:21:53,161 - You go. - You're going after them? 1335 01:21:53,162 --> 01:21:56,915 They the homies, okay? I can't leave 'em out here with the ops. 1336 01:21:56,916 --> 01:22:00,378 I got to go and represent. They my castmates. 1337 01:22:00,878 --> 01:22:03,421 Actors code. Respect. 1338 01:22:03,422 --> 01:22:04,423 Yeah, yeah. 1339 01:22:05,550 --> 01:22:07,175 - Can we get a... - Do you mind? 1340 01:22:07,176 --> 01:22:10,012 - We're such fans of everything you do. - Come on, please. 1341 01:22:12,390 --> 01:22:15,559 Man, y'all groupied out. Y'all groupied out. What? Let's go. 1342 01:22:15,560 --> 01:22:18,354 - Yes! - Okay. Everybody get in here. Grin. Okay. 1343 01:22:20,815 --> 01:22:23,316 - Don't post that. - No, no, no. 1344 01:22:23,317 --> 01:22:26,903 Can we get one more for safety? I don't think my face was totally in there. 1345 01:22:26,904 --> 01:22:28,864 - No, it's fine. - It's fine, it's fine. 1346 01:22:28,865 --> 01:22:31,324 - You're gonna need that. - You sure? 1347 01:22:31,325 --> 01:22:32,535 Of course. 1348 01:22:33,077 --> 01:22:34,787 I got another one. 1349 01:22:35,788 --> 01:22:38,416 All right. Keep it gangster. 1350 01:22:44,380 --> 01:22:45,631 Legend. 1351 01:22:46,174 --> 01:22:47,549 You thinking what I'm thinking? 1352 01:22:47,550 --> 01:22:48,551 Oh, yeah. 1353 01:22:50,344 --> 01:22:52,763 - It could work, right? - Hundred percent. 1354 01:22:54,640 --> 01:22:56,600 What are you thinking? 1355 01:22:56,601 --> 01:22:59,811 Just so I'm... Just to make sure that it's exactly what I'm thinking. 1356 01:22:59,812 --> 01:23:01,188 Which I'm sure it is, totally. I mean... 1357 01:23:01,189 --> 01:23:02,690 I'm super sure. 1358 01:23:03,900 --> 01:23:05,442 I'm thinking about killing that snake. 1359 01:23:05,443 --> 01:23:07,820 Now see, that's it, that's what... I was thinking that too. 1360 01:23:09,864 --> 01:23:11,032 Okay, here's the plan. 1361 01:23:11,949 --> 01:23:13,951 Griff, you get the detonator from Kenny. 1362 01:23:15,119 --> 01:23:17,330 Claire, you fire up the generators. 1363 01:23:19,123 --> 01:23:21,167 Kenny, you set up the cameras. 1364 01:23:24,837 --> 01:23:26,671 I'll get the golf cart. 1365 01:23:26,672 --> 01:23:29,257 We'll lure the snake into the pyro field 1366 01:23:29,258 --> 01:23:31,552 and end this thing once and for all. 1367 01:23:33,513 --> 01:23:35,765 You ready for our big Hollywood ending? 1368 01:23:42,688 --> 01:23:43,855 - You ready? - Yeah. 1369 01:23:43,856 --> 01:23:47,359 Kenny said as soon as we get to the pyro field, we can detonate these one by one. 1370 01:23:47,360 --> 01:23:50,696 - Gonna blow this bitch sky-high. - Sky-freaking-high. 1371 01:23:56,911 --> 01:23:58,454 Come get us, asshole! 1372 01:24:05,294 --> 01:24:06,128 Where is he? 1373 01:24:09,215 --> 01:24:10,842 Oh, shit! 1374 01:24:14,470 --> 01:24:17,431 - Oh, shit. Oh, shit! - Oh, shit! 1375 01:24:18,182 --> 01:24:20,892 - Doesn't this go faster? - Well, take off the governor. 1376 01:24:20,893 --> 01:24:22,978 Underneath there. See if you can rip it off. 1377 01:24:22,979 --> 01:24:25,230 - Governor? - The governor! It slows it down. 1378 01:24:25,231 --> 01:24:28,484 - The hell you talking about, governor? - I'm talking about golf cart technology! 1379 01:24:34,949 --> 01:24:37,075 - Where'd it go? - I don't see it. I don't know where it is. 1380 01:24:37,076 --> 01:24:38,244 Keep your head on a swivel. 1381 01:24:39,161 --> 01:24:40,287 I don't see it anywhere. 1382 01:24:40,288 --> 01:24:42,122 - Whoa! - Whoa! 1383 01:24:42,123 --> 01:24:43,082 Oh, my God! 1384 01:24:45,084 --> 01:24:46,126 Oh, shit. 1385 01:24:46,127 --> 01:24:47,794 We lost the signal. 1386 01:24:47,795 --> 01:24:49,504 If we don't get this thing online in time... 1387 01:24:49,505 --> 01:24:50,714 Then we're all dead. 1388 01:24:50,715 --> 01:24:51,966 - Let's go. - Let's go. 1389 01:24:54,927 --> 01:24:56,344 Dude, you're actually a really good driver. 1390 01:24:56,345 --> 01:24:58,139 Thank you. 1391 01:25:00,558 --> 01:25:01,809 Oh, my God! 1392 01:25:06,480 --> 01:25:09,065 Why is there no power? Why is there no power? 1393 01:25:09,066 --> 01:25:11,484 Pyro field dead ahead. It's now or never. 1394 01:25:11,485 --> 01:25:12,569 Armed and ready. 1395 01:25:12,570 --> 01:25:14,112 - No! - All right, look. 1396 01:25:14,113 --> 01:25:16,072 - Look for something like this. - Like this, okay. 1397 01:25:16,073 --> 01:25:17,074 Almost there! 1398 01:25:21,204 --> 01:25:23,955 It's getting closer! It's getting closer! Oh, God! 1399 01:25:23,956 --> 01:25:24,999 Go faster! 1400 01:25:27,084 --> 01:25:29,127 Fuck. Found it! 1401 01:25:29,128 --> 01:25:30,838 - Can I hit it now? - Hold. Hold. 1402 01:25:34,759 --> 01:25:36,092 Now! Hit it now! 1403 01:25:36,093 --> 01:25:38,721 Die, you giant snake bitch! 1404 01:25:41,516 --> 01:25:42,682 - What the-- - What? 1405 01:25:42,683 --> 01:25:45,101 It's not working! It's not working! 1406 01:25:45,102 --> 01:25:47,479 - Hit all of them. - I am! I'm hitting every one of 'em! 1407 01:25:47,480 --> 01:25:49,606 And now we die! Now we die! 1408 01:25:49,607 --> 01:25:50,774 Why didn't it happen? 1409 01:25:50,775 --> 01:25:51,942 - Why isn't it... - I don't know. 1410 01:25:51,943 --> 01:25:52,985 Oh, wait. 1411 01:25:54,654 --> 01:25:55,988 I forgot to turn it on. 1412 01:25:59,534 --> 01:26:01,994 Yes! 1413 01:26:03,704 --> 01:26:06,164 - Yes! Yes. Yes. - Yes! Yes! 1414 01:26:06,165 --> 01:26:07,583 Yeah! 1415 01:26:22,348 --> 01:26:23,266 Yeah! 1416 01:26:24,559 --> 01:26:25,935 Did we kill it? 1417 01:26:27,353 --> 01:26:29,689 - No! - Why? 1418 01:26:31,649 --> 01:26:32,983 Come on. The cart's stuck. 1419 01:26:32,984 --> 01:26:34,401 Oh, shit. 1420 01:26:34,402 --> 01:26:35,987 - Go! - Go, go, go. 1421 01:26:40,575 --> 01:26:42,535 - It's a dead end. - Oh, my God. 1422 01:26:47,665 --> 01:26:48,666 Shit. 1423 01:26:56,465 --> 01:26:57,842 We're all gonna die. 1424 01:27:38,966 --> 01:27:40,885 Not on my watch, mister. 1425 01:27:54,524 --> 01:27:56,067 - Oh, man. - Gross. 1426 01:28:06,744 --> 01:28:07,787 Griff, no! 1427 01:28:23,469 --> 01:28:25,429 And that's a wrap on snake. 1428 01:29:15,021 --> 01:29:17,064 - Thank you very much. - Thank you. 1429 01:29:23,362 --> 01:29:26,532 A long time ago, a group of artists had a vision 1430 01:29:27,408 --> 01:29:31,328 to one day live their dream of making a major motion picture. 1431 01:29:31,329 --> 01:29:37,210 And last year, against all odds, I'm proud to say that dream was realized. 1432 01:29:41,339 --> 01:29:43,006 As my friend Kenny likes to say, 1433 01:29:43,007 --> 01:29:47,135 the snake is a metaphor for the monsters that come for all of us 1434 01:29:47,136 --> 01:29:48,929 if our dreams remain unrealized. 1435 01:29:48,930 --> 01:29:52,183 And to be clear, there's also a non-metaphor snake. 1436 01:29:53,601 --> 01:29:54,726 Oh, my God! 1437 01:29:54,727 --> 01:29:59,398 Quick shoutout to Claire Simons and Kenny Trent! 1438 01:30:00,399 --> 01:30:02,568 Better luck next time! 1439 01:30:06,030 --> 01:30:07,989 While we may not have the rights... 1440 01:30:07,990 --> 01:30:09,658 We don't have... We definitely don't have the rights. 1441 01:30:09,659 --> 01:30:12,328 This is our completely unauthorized, 1442 01:30:13,579 --> 01:30:19,168 possibly illegal reboot of the Sony classic film... 1443 01:30:21,712 --> 01:30:25,550 - Ladies and gentlemen, The Anaconda! - The Anaconda! 1444 01:31:43,544 --> 01:31:45,378 Are you Doug McCallister? 1445 01:31:45,379 --> 01:31:46,380 Uh-huh. 1446 01:31:46,964 --> 01:31:49,591 You directed the unauthorized version of Anaconda 1447 01:31:49,592 --> 01:31:51,177 even though you didn't have the rights? 1448 01:31:52,303 --> 01:31:53,262 Yeah. 1449 01:31:53,763 --> 01:31:55,056 I saw your little movie. 1450 01:31:58,017 --> 01:32:00,436 And I loved it. I loved it. 1451 01:32:00,937 --> 01:32:05,024 That's why I'm here. I'm here because we're doing another Anaconda, 1452 01:32:05,525 --> 01:32:07,401 and I want you to direct it. 1453 01:32:08,653 --> 01:32:09,820 Are you in? 1454 01:33:55,801 --> 01:33:56,886 Guys? 1455 01:34:01,057 --> 01:34:02,225 Griff? 1456 01:34:11,192 --> 01:34:13,402 I'm alive!