1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.BZ 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.BZ 3 00:00:59,476 --> 00:01:01,854 We've gone as far as we can go by road. 4 00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,064 We need a boat. 5 00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:07,609 Should only take a few days. 6 00:01:08,277 --> 00:01:10,028 We shouldn't be here. 7 00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,281 The jungle doesn't want us here. 8 00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,366 There is... 9 00:01:45,981 --> 00:01:47,900 We have to do this. 10 00:01:48,525 --> 00:01:50,944 What's waiting for us will change our lives. 11 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:54,656 Fine. 12 00:01:55,532 --> 00:01:56,490 I'll go alone. 13 00:01:56,491 --> 00:01:57,409 Ana. 14 00:01:57,993 --> 00:01:58,952 Ana! 15 00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:01,038 Don't do this! 16 00:02:18,514 --> 00:02:19,264 It's her. 17 00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:31,735 Get to the boat! 18 00:02:40,244 --> 00:02:41,828 Come on! Let's go! 19 00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:44,748 - Hey! - Stop! 20 00:02:45,707 --> 00:02:46,416 Take my hand! 21 00:03:04,142 --> 00:03:05,936 We start tight on a full moon. 22 00:03:07,104 --> 00:03:09,356 Milky. Almost yellow. 23 00:03:10,607 --> 00:03:11,984 And we crane down 24 00:03:12,860 --> 00:03:17,072 to reveal an idyllic, suburban street. 25 00:03:17,990 --> 00:03:21,534 We float past a series of white picket fences, 26 00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:23,328 until we settle on a sewer grate. 27 00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:25,914 Pow! Flies open! 28 00:03:26,582 --> 00:03:29,417 Something big and scaly slithers out, 29 00:03:29,418 --> 00:03:32,712 fast, hungry, definitely not human, 30 00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,965 as a pulsating score kicks in. 31 00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:46,058 We're on the back of the beast 32 00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:49,229 as it slithers menacingly towards a little blue house. 33 00:04:02,618 --> 00:04:04,368 Wait. I'm sorry. 34 00:04:04,369 --> 00:04:07,413 This is our wedding video you're talking about? 35 00:04:07,414 --> 00:04:11,375 Yes, though I actually don't think of them as videos. They're more like short films. 36 00:04:11,376 --> 00:04:15,713 Yeah, because I'm not sure this is quite what we had in mind. 37 00:04:15,714 --> 00:04:17,964 Okay. I know. It's a little different than normal but-- 38 00:04:17,965 --> 00:04:20,968 We really liked the one you did for Karen and Bart. 39 00:04:20,969 --> 00:04:22,428 When they walk by the river 40 00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:24,764 - and jump up and high-five. - That jump was dope. 41 00:04:24,765 --> 00:04:26,224 And I loved that song they used. 42 00:04:26,225 --> 00:04:30,269 I don't want to wait For our lives to be over 43 00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:34,232 I want to know right now How does it feel 44 00:04:34,233 --> 00:04:37,109 - You know it. Yeah. - Guys. Here's the thing. 45 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:40,196 I really like you guys. And you said you're horror fans, 46 00:04:40,197 --> 00:04:42,323 and I'm like, "I love horror so much." 47 00:04:42,324 --> 00:04:45,159 And I thought this could be special. You know what I mean? 48 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:47,787 This is a film you're gonna watch for the rest of your lives. 49 00:04:47,788 --> 00:04:49,914 But this isn't a film, Doug. 50 00:04:49,915 --> 00:04:53,751 This is a wedding video, and we want one where they do a little jump. 51 00:04:53,752 --> 00:04:55,796 - Yeah. - Now, can you do that for us or not? 52 00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:04,428 Okay. 53 00:05:04,429 --> 00:05:07,557 And do you mind if I'm doing warm-ups? Is it okay? 54 00:05:07,558 --> 00:05:09,559 Oh, yeah. I've seen much crazier. 55 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:10,643 Okay, good. 56 00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:13,187 Does it sound better to say my line, 57 00:05:13,188 --> 00:05:16,315 "His vision is blurry, which could suggest..." 58 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:19,527 or, "His vision is blurry, which could suggest..." 59 00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:22,363 Or I could-- You know what? I could even do, like, an accent. I could do just... 60 00:05:22,364 --> 00:05:24,991 I think you just should do it the way you auditioned it, honey. 61 00:05:24,992 --> 00:05:26,075 - Yeah. - Yeah. 62 00:05:26,076 --> 00:05:29,912 It's been a while since I booked anything, and I just want it to go well. 63 00:05:29,913 --> 00:05:31,330 - Yeah. - I just... 64 00:05:31,331 --> 00:05:32,791 It's hard out there. 65 00:05:34,042 --> 00:05:35,126 Sorry. 66 00:05:35,127 --> 00:05:37,003 Doctor number 3, we're ready for you. 67 00:05:37,004 --> 00:05:38,212 Okay, knock 'em dead. 68 00:05:38,213 --> 00:05:39,922 Okay, thanks. Thank you, Donna. 69 00:05:39,923 --> 00:05:42,550 Hey, by the way, if you ever need anything from Lowe's, 70 00:05:42,551 --> 00:05:44,510 I will hook you up with my employee discount, 71 00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:45,721 no questions asked. 72 00:05:46,221 --> 00:05:47,556 - Okay? - Okay. 73 00:05:52,311 --> 00:05:55,021 Thanks. Ten more ccs of tramadol. 74 00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:56,772 Any idea what I'm looking at here? 75 00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,482 He said his vision was blurry, 76 00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:01,695 - so, you know, that could suggest-- - Optic neuritis. 77 00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:03,863 Already ruled that out. 78 00:06:03,864 --> 00:06:05,448 - Cut. - That's a cut! 79 00:06:05,449 --> 00:06:07,742 Hey, buddy, not sure what that accent is. 80 00:06:07,743 --> 00:06:09,994 Just do it normally, okay? 81 00:06:09,995 --> 00:06:11,287 We're gonna go again right away. 82 00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:12,205 Set. 83 00:06:12,206 --> 00:06:17,001 He said his vision was blurry, which could suggest-- 84 00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:20,046 Cut! Say the line faster. Okay? Faster this time. 85 00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:22,340 He said his vision was blurry, which could suggest-- 86 00:06:22,341 --> 00:06:24,842 Cut! Jesus, I think we gotta fire this guy. 87 00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:26,470 Can we get somebody else in here? 88 00:07:11,306 --> 00:07:15,268 Griff, it's Doug. I just ran into your mom at the supermarket. 89 00:07:15,269 --> 00:07:17,145 She said you booked a big gig today. 90 00:07:17,855 --> 00:07:18,813 I'm proud of you, bud. 91 00:07:18,814 --> 00:07:21,148 Everyone in Buffalo misses you. 92 00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:23,652 I love you. Come visit, man! 93 00:07:25,654 --> 00:07:26,988 Jesus, Jerry. 94 00:07:26,989 --> 00:07:30,576 Doug, what is this thing about-- there's some kind of sewer monster? 95 00:07:31,368 --> 00:07:32,452 Oh, boy. 96 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:35,455 Doug. 97 00:07:36,582 --> 00:07:40,586 Look, I get that this is not what you dreamed about when you were a kid. 98 00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:43,337 But dreams, they go. Huh? 99 00:07:43,338 --> 00:07:45,339 Now, I'll be retiring soon. 100 00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:49,427 And, Doug, it is only a matter of time before all this is yours. 101 00:07:49,428 --> 00:07:50,511 - Really? - Yeah. 102 00:07:50,512 --> 00:07:52,806 Look around. Take it all in. 103 00:07:53,891 --> 00:07:55,184 And imagine. 104 00:07:56,935 --> 00:08:00,021 If you do it right, it's a pretty sweet set-up we got here. 105 00:08:00,022 --> 00:08:03,650 This is a B, and maybe even a B+ life we're talking about. 106 00:08:06,778 --> 00:08:09,948 Are you sure you don't wanna do anything for your birthday? 107 00:08:10,449 --> 00:08:12,743 You used to make me celebrate your half-birthdays. 108 00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:15,746 Let's go get a beer. 109 00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:17,664 Or something. 110 00:08:19,041 --> 00:08:21,501 Maybe we just watch that new mountain climbing doc. 111 00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:24,463 About the lady that falls to her own death? 112 00:08:24,963 --> 00:08:26,172 Yeah. 113 00:08:26,173 --> 00:08:30,843 Fine, we can do the one about the free diver in the Maldives. 114 00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:33,513 Who drowns? Jesus Christ, Doug. 115 00:08:33,514 --> 00:08:35,806 I don't know. Let's just take a gummy and go to bed early. 116 00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:37,518 Surprise! 117 00:08:39,228 --> 00:08:41,229 Oh, my God, Malie. No! 118 00:08:41,230 --> 00:08:44,065 Oh, yes. Yes, you love a good, big birthday party. 119 00:08:44,066 --> 00:08:45,733 Dad, should've seen your face. 120 00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:47,652 - You knew about this? - It was my idea. 121 00:08:47,653 --> 00:08:49,654 - Buddy, take my coat, please. Thank you. - Okay. 122 00:08:49,655 --> 00:08:51,030 Hey! How are you? 123 00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:54,033 - Yeah. Happy birthday! - Jesus, Kenny. My back! 124 00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:56,452 - I'm sorry. - No! That's not... 125 00:08:56,453 --> 00:08:58,913 The actual lotion. The actual basket. 126 00:08:58,914 --> 00:09:00,706 "It puts the lotion in the basket"? 127 00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:02,667 - eBay, buddy. - Dude, that is sick. 128 00:09:02,668 --> 00:09:04,628 Yeah, no, that is actually sick. 129 00:09:05,921 --> 00:09:09,423 - Happy birthday, Dougie. - Thanks for making the trek, Claire. 130 00:09:09,424 --> 00:09:14,595 You know I love Buffalo this time of year. The slush, the hypothermia. 131 00:09:14,596 --> 00:09:15,888 What's up? No Trent? 132 00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:17,223 No Trent. 133 00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:18,891 Ever again, in fact. 134 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:21,143 He started banging his dental hygienist. 135 00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:24,063 Anyway, tonight is all about you, baby. 136 00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:25,732 - It's about me. - It's about you. 137 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:31,487 You came! Here you are. Oh, my God. 138 00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:32,572 It's been too long, pal. 139 00:09:32,573 --> 00:09:35,032 It's so good to see you. It has been way too long. 140 00:09:35,033 --> 00:09:36,117 Happy birthday. 141 00:09:36,118 --> 00:09:37,827 Thank you for coming out here. 142 00:09:37,828 --> 00:09:39,328 Think I'm gonna miss this? Never. 143 00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:41,038 We got a lot of catching up to do. 144 00:09:41,039 --> 00:09:46,836 Many years ago, a group of young, passionate artists had a vision. 145 00:09:46,837 --> 00:09:52,550 It was a vision that's not particularly original or even good, 146 00:09:52,551 --> 00:09:54,594 but it was theirs. 147 00:09:54,595 --> 00:09:58,014 And so they made that vision a reality. 148 00:09:58,015 --> 00:10:00,641 And, without further ado, 149 00:10:00,642 --> 00:10:05,771 I present to you a completely unrestored print 150 00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:10,861 of 13-year-old Doug McCallister's masterpiece, The Quatch. 151 00:10:11,737 --> 00:10:13,946 What? I thought we lost all the copies of that! 152 00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,031 - No way. - Nope. 153 00:10:15,032 --> 00:10:17,909 I found it in my mom's garage. It was stuck in the player. 154 00:10:17,910 --> 00:10:20,328 Are we sure this is okay for the kids to watch? 155 00:10:20,329 --> 00:10:21,621 Who gives a shit? 156 00:10:21,622 --> 00:10:24,749 Mrs Brown had us bleep all the swears so we could show it at the school assembly. 157 00:10:24,750 --> 00:10:26,042 Yeah, which didn't make much sense 158 00:10:26,043 --> 00:10:28,669 because we were very clear about it being R-rated. 159 00:10:28,670 --> 00:10:31,255 - Happy birthday, pal. - This isn't happening. 160 00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:33,175 It's happening. Here we go. 161 00:10:34,801 --> 00:10:35,968 - God. - Here, sit. 162 00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,638 I'm gonna kill you. 163 00:10:41,058 --> 00:10:42,434 I haven't changed a bit. 164 00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:45,562 Holy ****! 165 00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:48,898 - Look at the grass! - Hot on the trail! 166 00:10:48,899 --> 00:10:51,359 - Look out for the quatch. - Here we go. 167 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:54,946 Before you **** strike me, I need to **** ask you one **** thing. 168 00:10:54,947 --> 00:10:56,656 You got some **** bite left? 169 00:10:56,657 --> 00:10:57,615 Or you all **** bark? 170 00:10:57,616 --> 00:10:58,866 Boom! 171 00:10:58,867 --> 00:11:01,536 Damn, we'd been watching a lot of Scorsese. 172 00:11:01,537 --> 00:11:03,663 We didn't quite have the ear for it, did we? 173 00:11:03,664 --> 00:11:06,541 - I need to tell you something. - What is it? 174 00:11:06,542 --> 00:11:09,627 That I love you. I've always loved you. 175 00:11:09,628 --> 00:11:11,379 And I always **** will. 176 00:11:11,380 --> 00:11:12,880 I **** love you too. 177 00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:14,800 Now, kiss me, woman. 178 00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:19,053 So much charisma. Already, you had it. 179 00:11:19,054 --> 00:11:21,639 I still can't believe I let Doug talk me into doing that. 180 00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:23,392 What are you talking about? That was your idea. 181 00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:26,937 Yeah! 182 00:11:27,563 --> 00:11:29,772 - It's coming for us. - We're trapped. 183 00:11:29,773 --> 00:11:31,400 What the hell are we gonna do? 184 00:11:32,651 --> 00:11:33,485 - No! - Yes. 185 00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:36,488 Oh, my God. We're all gonna die! 186 00:11:40,450 --> 00:11:42,159 This is where it gets real. 187 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,454 Not on my watch, mister. 188 00:11:46,456 --> 00:11:48,249 - Boom! - Yeah! 189 00:11:48,250 --> 00:11:50,126 - Yeah! - Yeah! 190 00:11:50,127 --> 00:11:51,503 Amazing! 191 00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:54,131 So good! 192 00:11:59,469 --> 00:12:02,471 That's probably the best birthday gift I've ever received. 193 00:12:02,472 --> 00:12:04,891 - I didn't even know it existed. - Well, I'm giving it to you. 194 00:12:04,892 --> 00:12:06,894 Plus the TV 'cause you can't get it out. 195 00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:09,104 - Yay! - Yes! 196 00:12:12,816 --> 00:12:16,194 - It was right after, you know... - Right after senior year of college. 197 00:12:16,195 --> 00:12:19,572 Yes, that's when Anaconda came out. Remember? We saw it like 30 times. 198 00:12:19,573 --> 00:12:21,532 Put it right there alongside the classics. 199 00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:23,492 Totally. How about that cast? Come on. 200 00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:27,079 - J.Lo, Ice Cube, Owen Wilson, Stoltz. - Oh, for sure. 201 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,372 I mean, it's a murderers' row. 202 00:12:28,373 --> 00:12:33,128 Plus, that snake was like a metaphor for our lives at that moment. 203 00:12:35,005 --> 00:12:37,590 Like, how life is coming at you, you know, 204 00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:40,551 hunting you and forcing you, like, 205 00:12:40,552 --> 00:12:41,720 off your... 206 00:12:42,596 --> 00:12:44,806 like your parents' health insurance and stuff. 207 00:12:47,893 --> 00:12:49,685 - I don't know... - No, that's true. 208 00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,103 - Yeah, that's... - It was like that. 209 00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:52,563 - That's right, Kenny. - Whatever. 210 00:12:52,564 --> 00:12:56,526 How about that accent by Jon Voight? How about that? That was a choice. 211 00:12:56,527 --> 00:12:59,570 "They wrap around you until you get the privilege 212 00:12:59,571 --> 00:13:01,656 - of hearing your bones break... - Bones break... 213 00:13:01,657 --> 00:13:07,496 ...before the power of embrace causes your veins to explode." 214 00:13:08,163 --> 00:13:09,164 Sorry. 215 00:13:11,792 --> 00:13:13,710 I have the rights to Anaconda. 216 00:13:15,712 --> 00:13:16,755 What? 217 00:13:17,172 --> 00:13:18,841 I have the rights to Anaconda. 218 00:13:20,342 --> 00:13:21,676 Yeah. 219 00:13:21,677 --> 00:13:26,514 Apparently, the movie was based on a novel by some dead Japanese guy. 220 00:13:26,515 --> 00:13:30,351 And my agent introduced me to his widow. 221 00:13:30,352 --> 00:13:35,565 Unbelievably, she was such a fan of the four episodes that I did on S.W.A.T... 222 00:13:35,566 --> 00:13:37,775 - Who isn't? - ...that she gave me the rights. 223 00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:40,529 Dude. So what are you gonna do with them? 224 00:13:41,238 --> 00:13:42,489 Well, not me. 225 00:13:43,824 --> 00:13:44,992 Us. 226 00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:49,161 We're gonna reboot the thing. Indie-style. 227 00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:53,583 Three weeks, run-and-gun in the Amazon. Skeletal crew. 228 00:13:53,584 --> 00:13:56,794 Claire, you and I can star. Kenny, you shoot it. Doug, you direct. 229 00:13:56,795 --> 00:13:59,380 Huh? Come on. What do you say? 230 00:13:59,381 --> 00:14:01,799 I mean, it's a wonderful idea in theory, but... 231 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:05,136 I'm in! I can get time off from work. 232 00:14:05,137 --> 00:14:06,846 Yes, you can, Kenny. Sweet! 233 00:14:06,847 --> 00:14:10,516 Kenny, what are you talking about? You're in? He's not... No. He's not in. 234 00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:13,936 He says one thing and you're in already. You're going to the Amazon. 235 00:14:13,937 --> 00:14:16,564 - He's not in. - What do you say, Claire? 236 00:14:16,565 --> 00:14:18,191 - I just... - Come on. 237 00:14:18,192 --> 00:14:20,067 I don't know if I'm in the right headspace... 238 00:14:20,068 --> 00:14:21,319 - Of course you are. - ...with the divorce. 239 00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:23,237 Of course you're not in the right headspace. 240 00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:25,281 That's the best headspace. Are you kidding me? 241 00:14:25,282 --> 00:14:28,618 Come on, it's like Eat Pray Love and... shit. 242 00:14:28,619 --> 00:14:29,620 Come on. 243 00:14:30,412 --> 00:14:32,455 You know what? I'm in. 244 00:14:32,456 --> 00:14:34,957 - What? Really? - Yes! Sweet. 245 00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:37,376 Yeah. I mean, my life is totally shit anyway so... 246 00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:39,337 God, I'm so happy to hear that. 247 00:14:39,338 --> 00:14:42,006 I mean, not that your life is shit, but that you're in. 248 00:14:42,007 --> 00:14:44,050 Besides, as soon as Doug says yes, 249 00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:46,010 we'll probably need you to finance this whole thing. 250 00:14:46,011 --> 00:14:47,512 - What? - Thank you. 251 00:14:47,513 --> 00:14:48,555 Doug? 252 00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:54,895 Griff, I'm sorry. 253 00:14:55,479 --> 00:14:59,315 I got responsibilities. I got Malie, Charlie, my job. 254 00:14:59,316 --> 00:15:01,984 I know. Making wedding videos. 255 00:15:01,985 --> 00:15:03,403 Films. Right. 256 00:15:04,029 --> 00:15:05,697 It's a good life, you know? 257 00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:08,075 It's a B, B+ life. 258 00:15:09,201 --> 00:15:10,744 B, B+ life? 259 00:15:12,246 --> 00:15:13,455 It's a good life. 260 00:15:15,082 --> 00:15:16,541 Do you remember when we were kids 261 00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:18,209 and we would stay up till 4:00 in the morning, 262 00:15:18,210 --> 00:15:20,796 hanging out in your mom's basement watching horror movies? 263 00:15:21,505 --> 00:15:23,256 Scaring the shit out of ourselves. 264 00:15:23,257 --> 00:15:25,508 Texas Chainsaw on, like, repeat. 265 00:15:25,509 --> 00:15:28,011 Now we have the chance to make one ourselves. 266 00:15:28,846 --> 00:15:31,723 Dude, it's what we dreamed about ever since we were little kids. 267 00:15:33,475 --> 00:15:34,643 I hear ya. 268 00:15:35,644 --> 00:15:37,896 But we're not kids anymore, Griff. 269 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:39,815 I'm sorry. 270 00:15:42,109 --> 00:15:43,819 Yeah. I know. All right. 271 00:15:44,820 --> 00:15:45,863 I just... 272 00:15:46,780 --> 00:15:47,948 I get it. I do. 273 00:15:48,866 --> 00:15:50,033 I get it. 274 00:15:55,581 --> 00:15:57,875 Still watching The Quatch. 275 00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,591 Charlie, why don't you go check on those cookies? 276 00:16:06,175 --> 00:16:08,719 Okay, but I'm pausing it, so... 277 00:16:09,303 --> 00:16:10,304 don't touch it. 278 00:16:11,388 --> 00:16:13,556 Gonna need some ice-cold milch with that. 279 00:16:13,557 --> 00:16:14,808 You got it. 280 00:16:16,018 --> 00:16:17,602 - What are you doing? - What? 281 00:16:17,603 --> 00:16:19,020 Just go make the movie. 282 00:16:19,021 --> 00:16:20,396 Malie. 283 00:16:20,397 --> 00:16:23,024 Come on. Every time you watch this thing, you light up. 284 00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:26,194 Like I haven't seen you light up in a long time. 285 00:16:26,195 --> 00:16:29,697 So what? I'm supposed to chase some Hollywood fantasy I had as a kid? 286 00:16:29,698 --> 00:16:31,991 Waste a bunch of money and time, and for what? 287 00:16:31,992 --> 00:16:34,203 In the end, what's it gonna change? 288 00:16:36,788 --> 00:16:37,789 Okay. 289 00:16:39,166 --> 00:16:40,167 Okay. 290 00:16:40,709 --> 00:16:41,710 Okay. 291 00:16:49,343 --> 00:16:51,552 We hope you come to celebrate... 292 00:16:51,553 --> 00:16:52,595 As we become... 293 00:16:52,596 --> 00:16:53,972 The Hansons. 294 00:16:55,557 --> 00:16:57,434 Holy shit. 295 00:17:09,320 --> 00:17:11,490 ...what will it be? 296 00:17:12,741 --> 00:17:17,412 I don't want to wait For our lives to be over 297 00:17:17,913 --> 00:17:19,830 What am I singing? 298 00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:22,917 Hey, dude. 299 00:17:25,087 --> 00:17:26,379 I don't want to wait, man. 300 00:17:28,632 --> 00:17:31,635 Our lives could be, like... over. 301 00:17:32,261 --> 00:17:33,636 What are you talking about? 302 00:17:33,637 --> 00:17:37,140 The Anaconda thing. You were serious, right? 303 00:17:38,141 --> 00:17:39,267 Yes, very. 304 00:17:39,268 --> 00:17:40,686 Then let's do it. 305 00:17:41,687 --> 00:17:43,730 Let's reboot Anaconda. 306 00:17:44,398 --> 00:17:46,441 Yes! Yes. 307 00:18:07,754 --> 00:18:11,048 All right, budget-wise, soup to nuts, what does it cost to get this thing made? 308 00:18:11,049 --> 00:18:14,886 I figure we need three weeks of shooting. Some VFX, some SFX, 309 00:18:14,887 --> 00:18:18,181 a riverboat, a riverboat captain, travel to and from a jungle, 310 00:18:18,182 --> 00:18:21,934 and a gigantic real snake, preferably a rental. 311 00:18:21,935 --> 00:18:23,519 - Rental, copy. - All in, 312 00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:25,480 two, two-and-a-half million dollars. 313 00:18:26,106 --> 00:18:27,231 That sounds right. 314 00:18:27,232 --> 00:18:31,611 We've approved a loan for you for up to... 315 00:18:31,612 --> 00:18:33,487 $9,400. 316 00:18:33,488 --> 00:18:34,822 Yes! 317 00:18:34,823 --> 00:18:37,617 I've revised the budget down to... 318 00:18:37,618 --> 00:18:39,035 $43,000 all in. 319 00:18:39,036 --> 00:18:40,411 That sounds more right. 320 00:18:40,412 --> 00:18:42,371 Now, the film does have to be scary, right? 321 00:18:42,372 --> 00:18:46,292 Terrifying. But it can't just be about a giant snake killing people. 322 00:18:46,293 --> 00:18:47,627 - Exactly. - You know? 323 00:18:47,628 --> 00:18:49,754 It has to be about something, right? 324 00:18:49,755 --> 00:18:50,756 Right. 325 00:18:51,632 --> 00:18:53,132 I mean... 326 00:18:53,133 --> 00:18:54,176 - Themes. - Themes. 327 00:18:55,135 --> 00:18:56,260 Come on. 328 00:18:56,261 --> 00:18:58,054 - Like grief. - What about revenge? 329 00:18:58,055 --> 00:19:00,723 In terms of themes, that's like one of the top ones. 330 00:19:00,724 --> 00:19:02,683 - Oh, my God. I got a good one. - Hit me. 331 00:19:02,684 --> 00:19:04,561 Intergenerational trauma. 332 00:19:05,103 --> 00:19:06,771 I love intergenerational trauma. 333 00:19:06,772 --> 00:19:08,481 Who doesn't love intergenerational trauma? 334 00:19:08,482 --> 00:19:10,692 - It's the best. - We're onto something here. 335 00:19:18,825 --> 00:19:20,326 This is a masterpiece. 336 00:19:20,327 --> 00:19:22,578 You're a goddamn genius. I love it. 337 00:19:22,579 --> 00:19:24,080 - Don't change a word. - Not a word. 338 00:19:24,081 --> 00:19:26,457 Dude, you killed it. It's scary, emotional, funny when it needs to be. 339 00:19:26,458 --> 00:19:28,918 - Romantic. - Dude, thank you. 340 00:19:28,919 --> 00:19:30,170 Hey, Doug... 341 00:19:31,839 --> 00:19:35,175 I know that we had our little dust-up, but... 342 00:19:36,844 --> 00:19:38,678 I need to shoot this film, man. 343 00:19:38,679 --> 00:19:39,805 Dust-up? 344 00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:43,933 Yeah. He fired me from the wedding video stuff 345 00:19:43,934 --> 00:19:46,602 'cause I got a little wasted. 346 00:19:46,603 --> 00:19:48,063 He knocked over the wedding cake. 347 00:19:49,064 --> 00:19:51,983 - But I'm dealing with it. - Like, getting sober? 348 00:19:51,984 --> 00:19:53,067 Yes. 349 00:19:53,068 --> 00:19:55,486 Well, I mean, Buffalo sober. 350 00:19:55,487 --> 00:19:56,487 Buffalo sober? 351 00:19:56,488 --> 00:19:57,823 Just beer and wine. 352 00:19:59,116 --> 00:20:02,786 And then some of the lighter liquors. But definitely not all of 'em. 353 00:20:04,204 --> 00:20:05,163 I'm proud of you. 354 00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:07,708 Doug? 355 00:20:09,835 --> 00:20:12,670 If I'm being honest, I enabled you a little bit. 356 00:20:12,671 --> 00:20:15,132 Of course you get a second chance. Let's do this. 357 00:20:16,049 --> 00:20:17,092 - Nice! - Thank you, man. 358 00:20:18,343 --> 00:20:19,802 Car's here. 359 00:20:19,803 --> 00:20:23,472 And you have the mefloquine, right? You only take that once a week. 360 00:20:23,473 --> 00:20:26,267 Hey, Dad. I almost forgot. 361 00:20:26,268 --> 00:20:30,313 - Talk to me. - But I got you this. 362 00:20:30,314 --> 00:20:31,814 What? 363 00:20:31,815 --> 00:20:33,108 I know. Pretty sick. 364 00:20:33,692 --> 00:20:36,611 "World's greatest Doug." 365 00:20:36,612 --> 00:20:39,280 - I thought it should say, "Dad". - Whatever, man, it's funny. 366 00:20:39,281 --> 00:20:41,491 I love it. It's much better. 367 00:21:18,946 --> 00:21:21,239 - So it begins. - Yeah! 368 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:23,242 - Oh, yeah. - All right. Made it. 369 00:21:24,409 --> 00:21:26,994 - We're here. - That's what I'm talkin' about! 370 00:21:26,995 --> 00:21:28,497 Brasília! 371 00:21:29,206 --> 00:21:31,874 So, hey, I was reading about anacondas on the plane. 372 00:21:31,875 --> 00:21:34,836 Basically, they wait in the water for days, 373 00:21:34,837 --> 00:21:37,922 stalking their prey, never moving, just waiting, 374 00:21:37,923 --> 00:21:39,341 and then when a prey comes... 375 00:21:39,967 --> 00:21:41,050 snatch and grab. 376 00:21:41,051 --> 00:21:43,845 Thousand pounds of pressure. Think you're gonna get away? You're not. 377 00:21:43,846 --> 00:21:46,682 Crushing you. Oxygen leaving your lungs. 378 00:21:48,392 --> 00:21:49,976 Oh, God, it's terrible. 379 00:21:49,977 --> 00:21:52,645 - So, like in the movie Anaconda. - Yeah, exactly. 380 00:21:52,646 --> 00:21:53,729 So it's real? 381 00:21:53,730 --> 00:21:54,898 Yeah, it's all real. 382 00:21:56,817 --> 00:21:58,652 Very real. 383 00:22:00,070 --> 00:22:02,739 There's this story about this woman... 384 00:22:03,365 --> 00:22:04,366 God bless her. 385 00:22:05,033 --> 00:22:07,578 The snake wraps around her so tight... 386 00:22:09,580 --> 00:22:11,206 the eyeballs just... 387 00:22:12,833 --> 00:22:14,792 - No. - No way. 388 00:22:14,793 --> 00:22:16,878 Yeah, it was my grandmother, Sylvana. 389 00:22:16,879 --> 00:22:18,004 Shit. 390 00:22:18,005 --> 00:22:21,300 Horrible grandmother. But still sad. 391 00:22:22,593 --> 00:22:23,760 I'm sorry, who are you? 392 00:22:24,428 --> 00:22:27,513 I'm sorry. Carlos Santiago. Yeah, you can call me Santiago. 393 00:22:27,514 --> 00:22:29,599 - Hey! It's Kenny. - Yeah, hey. 394 00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:32,226 - Kenny from the phone. Hey. - Kenny. Kenny, hey. 395 00:22:32,227 --> 00:22:34,354 - Hi. - Yeah, this is our snake handler. 396 00:22:35,397 --> 00:22:37,231 - Thank God. - He's supposed to be the best. 397 00:22:37,232 --> 00:22:39,400 No. "Supposed to be"? We have a joker here. 398 00:22:39,401 --> 00:22:42,069 No. I am the best. Yes. 399 00:22:42,070 --> 00:22:43,154 - That's good. - Yeah. 400 00:22:43,155 --> 00:22:45,240 So, welcome to Brazil. 401 00:22:46,366 --> 00:22:47,743 Let's meet the snake. 402 00:23:00,172 --> 00:23:02,633 Go around, we'll find her. 403 00:23:21,276 --> 00:23:24,154 When I found him, he was dying of starvation. 404 00:23:24,947 --> 00:23:29,325 His food supply destroyed by gold miners who put mercury in the river. 405 00:23:29,326 --> 00:23:32,162 - Gold miners? - Gold mining poisons our land. 406 00:23:32,955 --> 00:23:36,415 Their greed almost killed my snake. 407 00:23:36,416 --> 00:23:40,211 But I fed him, I nursed him back to life, 408 00:23:40,212 --> 00:23:43,840 and in many ways, he did the same for me. 409 00:23:43,841 --> 00:23:46,551 Yes. A tale as old as time. 410 00:23:46,552 --> 00:23:47,803 Saved by a snake. 411 00:23:50,806 --> 00:23:52,223 What's your name? 412 00:23:52,224 --> 00:23:53,307 What's... Griff. 413 00:23:53,308 --> 00:23:55,477 Okay, Griff. He's not only a snake. 414 00:23:56,186 --> 00:23:58,355 He's my tiny giant, my friend. 415 00:23:59,273 --> 00:24:03,068 One of the most important creatures of the herpetological world. 416 00:24:03,652 --> 00:24:05,319 No, of course... I... Sure. 417 00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:08,155 I didn't... I wasn't trying to... Yes. 418 00:24:08,156 --> 00:24:11,243 Okay. Let me introduce you. 419 00:24:14,746 --> 00:24:16,080 Heitor. 420 00:24:16,081 --> 00:24:18,958 - Heitor? - Oh, my goodness. 421 00:24:18,959 --> 00:24:20,626 Hey, cutie. 422 00:24:20,627 --> 00:24:22,629 - Oh, no. Not cutie. - Oh, my... 423 00:24:24,631 --> 00:24:27,425 Oh, hell yes! This thing is nuts! 424 00:24:27,426 --> 00:24:30,970 There are rumours of 'condas even bigger. 425 00:24:30,971 --> 00:24:33,515 Maybe four or five times this size. 426 00:24:34,933 --> 00:24:36,350 Go ahead, Kenny from the phone. 427 00:24:36,351 --> 00:24:39,646 Is it true that they regurgitate their prey? 428 00:24:40,189 --> 00:24:41,439 Sometimes. 429 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,399 I mean, if you're lucky, 430 00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:46,403 you'd die right away because of suffocation. 431 00:24:47,029 --> 00:24:51,115 But only the unlucky ones survive. 432 00:24:51,116 --> 00:24:52,326 Unlucky? 433 00:24:53,994 --> 00:24:58,456 Yeah, because then you might actually be conscious 434 00:24:58,457 --> 00:25:02,252 when the snake comes back to finish you off. 435 00:25:02,878 --> 00:25:05,756 Gotcha. Better to die. 436 00:25:15,015 --> 00:25:17,726 - Look at that boat! - This is money in the bank, baby. 437 00:25:43,460 --> 00:25:45,128 Hey. Let me ask you a question. 438 00:25:46,463 --> 00:25:47,756 Our snake guy... 439 00:25:48,257 --> 00:25:51,008 Does he seem kind of batshit crazy? 440 00:25:51,009 --> 00:25:53,553 I mean, he's best friends with a snake. 441 00:25:53,554 --> 00:25:55,012 - Of course he's a little quirky. - Yeah. 442 00:25:55,013 --> 00:25:56,097 But I like him. 443 00:25:56,098 --> 00:25:57,014 - Really? - Yeah. 444 00:25:57,015 --> 00:25:58,099 But then again, 445 00:25:58,100 --> 00:26:00,226 I used up all my vacation days 446 00:26:00,227 --> 00:26:03,521 to come make a self-financed snake movie with you three, so... 447 00:26:03,522 --> 00:26:05,731 - Yeah, your judgment is really off. - My judgment is off. 448 00:26:05,732 --> 00:26:06,858 - It always has been. - Exactly. 449 00:26:06,859 --> 00:26:08,901 Anybody talk to the captain? It's time to shoot. 450 00:26:08,902 --> 00:26:10,988 I'll reach out again, boss. 451 00:26:11,989 --> 00:26:14,156 Hi, guys. My name is Ana. 452 00:26:14,157 --> 00:26:15,993 I believe you spoke to my father on the phone? 453 00:26:16,577 --> 00:26:18,161 Bruno? That's your dad? 454 00:26:18,871 --> 00:26:21,081 Yeah, he sends his apologies, but he's at the hospital. 455 00:26:22,416 --> 00:26:23,791 - I'm sorry. - Unfortunately, 456 00:26:23,792 --> 00:26:25,710 you'll have to make other accommodations, 457 00:26:25,711 --> 00:26:28,921 'cause I need to take this boat upriver for a routine service. 458 00:26:28,922 --> 00:26:30,464 But I can assure you a full refund. 459 00:26:30,465 --> 00:26:31,507 No, wait. Wait. 460 00:26:31,508 --> 00:26:33,509 - Everything else is booked. - Yeah. 461 00:26:33,510 --> 00:26:35,386 And we're gonna shoot a movie. 462 00:26:35,387 --> 00:26:37,096 It's a reboot of Anaconda. 463 00:26:37,097 --> 00:26:39,098 Technically, it's more of a reimagining, but-- 464 00:26:39,099 --> 00:26:41,058 It's actually more of a spiritual sequel. 465 00:26:41,059 --> 00:26:42,226 Good for you. 466 00:26:42,227 --> 00:26:44,270 - There's gotta be a way, right? - We can crew the boat. 467 00:26:44,271 --> 00:26:45,354 There's nothing I can do... 468 00:26:45,355 --> 00:26:48,816 We have dreamed of making this film together our entire lives. 469 00:26:48,817 --> 00:26:51,277 Please. I am begging you. 470 00:26:51,278 --> 00:26:53,321 - Please. - Help us find another way. 471 00:26:53,322 --> 00:26:55,114 - Let's do this, but fast. - Okay. 472 00:26:55,115 --> 00:26:56,533 - Yes! Let's go! - Thank you! 473 00:27:19,681 --> 00:27:20,765 Wow! 474 00:27:20,766 --> 00:27:21,849 Yes! 475 00:27:21,850 --> 00:27:23,851 This is so beautiful. 476 00:27:23,852 --> 00:27:25,771 This is amazing. It's amazing. 477 00:27:27,814 --> 00:27:28,940 Looks exactly... 478 00:27:28,941 --> 00:27:29,942 Look! 479 00:27:31,652 --> 00:27:33,027 - Kenny? - Yeah, bud? 480 00:27:33,028 --> 00:27:35,112 - How did you find this boat? - Cocktail, anyone? 481 00:27:35,113 --> 00:27:36,114 Nice! 482 00:27:37,074 --> 00:27:38,075 It's a computer. 483 00:27:40,410 --> 00:27:41,578 Yes! 484 00:27:44,748 --> 00:27:49,002 I want a list of all the boats that left the marina in the last 3 hours. 485 00:27:50,045 --> 00:27:51,129 Now! 486 00:28:01,098 --> 00:28:03,474 One more thing, you guys, before we go to bed. 487 00:28:03,475 --> 00:28:05,268 We got a big day tomorrow. 488 00:28:05,269 --> 00:28:09,397 If you remember, we had a tradition on all our films. 489 00:28:09,398 --> 00:28:11,274 The night before we started shooting, 490 00:28:11,275 --> 00:28:13,901 we would say a prayer to the movie gods, 491 00:28:13,902 --> 00:28:17,113 asking them to basically not screw us over, 492 00:28:17,114 --> 00:28:20,408 and for the first time ever, may they listen. 493 00:28:20,409 --> 00:28:21,994 - Come on, to the movie gods. - Yes. 494 00:28:38,177 --> 00:28:39,468 All right. We're rolling. 495 00:28:39,469 --> 00:28:42,346 Anaconda, scene 15, take one. Slap it. 496 00:28:42,347 --> 00:28:43,849 Bella! 497 00:28:45,017 --> 00:28:48,186 - What the hell are you still doing here? - I've come to take you home. 498 00:28:48,187 --> 00:28:51,148 It's time you stopped chasing this mythical snake. 499 00:28:51,899 --> 00:28:54,193 And what if I'm not prone to giving up? 500 00:28:54,693 --> 00:28:55,944 I didn't see you filming there. 501 00:28:56,486 --> 00:28:57,904 What are we doing? EPK? 502 00:28:57,905 --> 00:28:59,989 Background, DVD, bonus stuff. 503 00:28:59,990 --> 00:29:03,826 The Anaconda is a story of an intrepid biologist played by Claire, 504 00:29:03,827 --> 00:29:09,457 who hires an unhinged snake tracker played by Griff, 505 00:29:09,458 --> 00:29:12,251 to hunt down and kill a giant, mythical 'conda 506 00:29:12,252 --> 00:29:13,586 that ate her entire family. 507 00:29:13,587 --> 00:29:16,547 Come and get me, you goddamn snake! 508 00:29:16,548 --> 00:29:18,799 And on a deeper level, it's about chasing your dreams. 509 00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:24,263 And camera set, push-ups good, and action! 510 00:29:24,264 --> 00:29:25,681 What's it like shooting with Doug again? 511 00:29:25,682 --> 00:29:27,266 He and I are best friends. 512 00:29:27,267 --> 00:29:28,684 We've worked together our whole lives. 513 00:29:28,685 --> 00:29:30,603 And I went out to LA, and he was gonna come out. 514 00:29:30,604 --> 00:29:33,356 We were gonna be a partnership, and he didn't do it. 515 00:29:33,357 --> 00:29:37,693 Griff and I planned to work together in LA, but, you know, life intervened. 516 00:29:37,694 --> 00:29:39,362 But it doesn't matter, 'cause now we're together 517 00:29:39,363 --> 00:29:42,490 and now we're back, we're making this, and it's as it should be. 518 00:29:42,491 --> 00:29:44,201 I am the insects. 519 00:29:45,244 --> 00:29:47,995 The anaconda moves slow and steady. 520 00:29:47,996 --> 00:29:49,163 Sometimes it goes fast. 521 00:29:49,164 --> 00:29:51,708 Snake POV, RD. Take 1. 522 00:29:52,417 --> 00:29:54,335 No. No, it's not working. 523 00:29:54,336 --> 00:29:56,922 Snake POV, the right way. Take 2. 524 00:29:57,756 --> 00:30:00,550 Sometimes he goes from above in the trees, 525 00:30:00,551 --> 00:30:02,677 sometimes from below in the water. 526 00:30:02,678 --> 00:30:06,889 The toothpick, it unlocked a couple of aspects of this character for me. 527 00:30:06,890 --> 00:30:08,016 There's something there. 528 00:30:11,728 --> 00:30:14,188 Why would I be nervous about doing a love story with Griff? 529 00:30:14,189 --> 00:30:15,357 You guys used to date. 530 00:30:15,899 --> 00:30:17,316 That was a long time ago. 531 00:30:17,317 --> 00:30:18,568 A little bit of chaos 532 00:30:18,569 --> 00:30:20,195 is part of the ingredients. 533 00:30:27,744 --> 00:30:28,995 Maybe look at each other. 534 00:30:28,996 --> 00:30:31,080 This might be the last time you look at each other. 535 00:30:31,081 --> 00:30:33,124 You'd think you'd be a little nicer to the guy 536 00:30:33,125 --> 00:30:35,001 who's out here to save your life. 537 00:30:35,002 --> 00:30:36,253 You're an asshole. 538 00:30:38,463 --> 00:30:39,464 Yeah. 539 00:30:40,299 --> 00:30:42,134 And a PhD. 540 00:30:45,512 --> 00:30:46,971 And cut. 541 00:30:46,972 --> 00:30:49,932 Great stuff, guys. We got it. 542 00:30:49,933 --> 00:30:52,852 Should we go one more time? You wanna try it again? 543 00:30:52,853 --> 00:30:54,520 No. I'm good if you're good. 544 00:30:54,521 --> 00:30:55,856 Let's go one more time. 545 00:31:03,822 --> 00:31:07,783 - The chemistry between you two is... - Yeah? 546 00:31:07,784 --> 00:31:09,369 Like we were right back in high school. 547 00:31:10,078 --> 00:31:11,495 When you looked up at her... 548 00:31:11,496 --> 00:31:12,830 Well, that's 'cause of your note. 549 00:31:12,831 --> 00:31:15,041 About taking the beat right before you did it? 550 00:31:15,042 --> 00:31:16,919 Yeah, yeah. It made the scene. 551 00:31:17,503 --> 00:31:18,670 I tell you... 552 00:31:19,838 --> 00:31:21,672 I never felt like this on S.W.A.T. 553 00:31:21,673 --> 00:31:23,966 I mean, granted I was only in a couple of episodes, 554 00:31:23,967 --> 00:31:26,010 but it was never collaborative. It was never fun. 555 00:31:26,011 --> 00:31:27,178 Not... 556 00:31:27,179 --> 00:31:28,846 Not like this. This... 557 00:31:28,847 --> 00:31:31,350 - This is-- - Like we were back on Quatch? 558 00:31:33,227 --> 00:31:34,228 Yeah. 559 00:31:35,771 --> 00:31:36,772 Yeah. 560 00:31:43,111 --> 00:31:44,780 Do you guys have chupacabra? 561 00:31:46,198 --> 00:31:47,866 That looks so good. 562 00:31:49,826 --> 00:31:52,453 Hey, so, one script thing. 563 00:31:52,454 --> 00:31:54,997 I was thinking, at the midway point, 564 00:31:54,998 --> 00:31:58,918 instead of talking the bad guy out of it, 565 00:31:58,919 --> 00:32:00,461 what if... 566 00:32:00,462 --> 00:32:02,214 Claire's character... 567 00:32:03,382 --> 00:32:04,715 headbutts him? 568 00:32:04,716 --> 00:32:06,718 Sorry. Headbutts him? 569 00:32:07,386 --> 00:32:08,511 Headbutts him. 570 00:32:08,512 --> 00:32:10,514 Or... Or... 571 00:32:11,807 --> 00:32:12,890 we both do. 572 00:32:12,891 --> 00:32:14,392 Double headbutt. 573 00:32:14,393 --> 00:32:16,644 - Come on. It's kinda revolutionary. - Double headbutt. 574 00:32:16,645 --> 00:32:18,145 That is super revolutionary. 575 00:32:18,146 --> 00:32:20,189 Why is that super revolutionary? 576 00:32:20,190 --> 00:32:22,358 Well, it's never been done. 577 00:32:22,359 --> 00:32:25,736 Jesus Christ. This is a beautiful scene with real stakes, Doug. 578 00:32:25,737 --> 00:32:27,280 Feel free to weigh in here. 579 00:32:27,281 --> 00:32:28,739 Nah, I hear you. I do. 580 00:32:28,740 --> 00:32:31,326 And, as always, I trust your instincts on this. 581 00:32:32,870 --> 00:32:35,454 But a double headbutt is pretty revolutionary. 582 00:32:35,455 --> 00:32:38,457 Right? It's very revolutionary. Yes. 583 00:32:38,458 --> 00:32:40,376 - There's no denying it. - None! 584 00:32:40,377 --> 00:32:43,504 Come on, Claire. Is the problem that you don't know how to headbutt? 585 00:32:43,505 --> 00:32:45,882 Why would I not know how to headbutt? 586 00:32:45,883 --> 00:32:48,134 We're not born with these skills. We learn them along the way. 587 00:32:48,135 --> 00:32:51,554 Let me show you. Tight core, breathe in, hold that breath. 588 00:32:51,555 --> 00:32:52,930 Yeah? 589 00:32:52,931 --> 00:32:54,391 And you can vocalise. 590 00:32:55,100 --> 00:32:59,646 Another kind of headbutt is more unleashed, just full-on... 591 00:33:01,231 --> 00:33:02,899 He got the arms in there. That's good. 592 00:33:02,900 --> 00:33:04,525 Send that shit into the goal. 593 00:33:04,526 --> 00:33:07,653 Or you put some Brazilian sauce on that. You know? 594 00:33:07,654 --> 00:33:09,281 And you go, boom! Toma! 595 00:33:09,823 --> 00:33:11,282 - Toma! - Toma? 596 00:33:11,283 --> 00:33:12,491 Hey, I love it. 597 00:33:12,492 --> 00:33:13,784 Yeah, that's right. 598 00:33:13,785 --> 00:33:16,037 - Brazilian spice. - Yeah! 599 00:33:16,038 --> 00:33:19,081 If I was gonna headbutt, I would go for the bridge of the nose. 600 00:33:19,082 --> 00:33:20,626 - Yes. - Just crack it. 601 00:33:21,293 --> 00:33:24,046 - Jesus! - Yes! That's it. 602 00:33:26,089 --> 00:33:28,509 - Jeez. Yeah, that's great. - And you go, "Toma! Toma!" 603 00:33:29,968 --> 00:33:31,803 I think it's a different... Toma! 604 00:33:32,471 --> 00:33:34,181 - Toma! - Yeah, toma! 605 00:33:35,807 --> 00:33:36,850 Goddamn! 606 00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:31,237 I'm sorry, but how could this happen, huh? 607 00:34:31,238 --> 00:34:33,114 Kenny, I thought you said this guy was a pro. 608 00:34:33,115 --> 00:34:36,617 That's what he said, but he hasn't provided us with a certificate. 609 00:34:36,618 --> 00:34:38,870 You fixed the crate, right? It's taken care of? 610 00:34:38,871 --> 00:34:42,541 My thing. My job. Under control. All good. 611 00:34:43,417 --> 00:34:47,588 My Heitor, he's a beautiful, intelligent, smart, sexy creature. 612 00:34:48,505 --> 00:34:50,673 He does exactly what I command. 613 00:34:51,466 --> 00:34:54,635 And I would never let anything happen 614 00:34:54,636 --> 00:34:59,390 to you or the crazy one, or her, or her, or this "actor" here. 615 00:34:59,391 --> 00:35:01,768 - What the... - So have a good night. 616 00:35:03,645 --> 00:35:08,775 May the sounds of the forest be the music of your dreams. 617 00:35:10,944 --> 00:35:12,737 Jesus... 618 00:35:12,738 --> 00:35:14,615 Man, he's a poet. 619 00:35:28,587 --> 00:35:30,923 Okay. Actors, on your marks. 620 00:35:31,715 --> 00:35:33,299 Santiago, is Heitor ready? 621 00:35:33,300 --> 00:35:35,051 Yes, Heitor is always ready. 622 00:35:35,052 --> 00:35:37,429 Heitor is ready, and action! 623 00:35:42,518 --> 00:35:43,519 Cut, please. 624 00:35:45,437 --> 00:35:47,980 - Cut? All right, cut. Yeah. - Yeah, I just-- Sorry. I need a little... 625 00:35:47,981 --> 00:35:49,440 Kenny, do you mind if I... 626 00:35:49,441 --> 00:35:51,652 Santiago, take five. Heitor, five. 627 00:35:52,444 --> 00:35:54,403 - Hey. Wow, that thing, it's really... - Hey. 628 00:35:54,404 --> 00:35:57,448 It's huge when you see it up close and personal like that. 629 00:35:57,449 --> 00:35:58,741 Majestic creature. 630 00:35:58,742 --> 00:36:00,826 But I just was wondering... 631 00:36:00,827 --> 00:36:05,581 I throw myself in front of the snake to kind of protect Claire's character, 632 00:36:05,582 --> 00:36:06,832 - right? - Correct. 633 00:36:06,833 --> 00:36:10,671 Is there any value in not doing that? 634 00:36:11,171 --> 00:36:12,463 What? No. 635 00:36:12,464 --> 00:36:15,466 - No, no, he sacrifices himself for her. - Yeah. Of course. 636 00:36:15,467 --> 00:36:17,885 - It caps his arc. It's so important. - Right. Right. 637 00:36:17,886 --> 00:36:21,097 - And also, dude, it's totally safe. - Yeah. 638 00:36:21,098 --> 00:36:23,933 - Santiago has Heitor under control. - Okay. 639 00:36:23,934 --> 00:36:27,103 - You've got nothing to worry about. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah... 640 00:36:27,104 --> 00:36:29,146 - We're good. You're good. - Yeah. Okay. 641 00:36:29,147 --> 00:36:30,940 - Okay. - All right, let's do this. 642 00:36:30,941 --> 00:36:32,317 All right, take it from the top. 643 00:36:34,069 --> 00:36:35,112 Back to one. 644 00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:39,408 Santiago, Heitor? Action! 645 00:36:40,492 --> 00:36:41,493 Go! 646 00:36:42,494 --> 00:36:45,496 I'm not leaving! Not without you, Derek. 647 00:36:45,497 --> 00:36:48,624 This thing's got me. The world's depending on you. 648 00:36:48,625 --> 00:36:50,668 I'm depending on you. 649 00:36:50,669 --> 00:36:53,421 Goddamn it! I love you, Derek van Hoyle! 650 00:36:53,422 --> 00:36:55,132 It's just-- I can't-- 651 00:36:56,341 --> 00:36:59,468 - Put your face right up next to the snake. - I don't like this. 652 00:36:59,469 --> 00:37:01,804 - I don't want to do it anymore. - Get a tiny bit closer. 653 00:37:01,805 --> 00:37:03,639 Get closer. He's friendly. 654 00:37:03,640 --> 00:37:06,475 - I think you got it, dude! - No, I don't quite have it! 655 00:37:06,476 --> 00:37:09,020 - Doug, you got the shot! You got the shot! - Hold it! Just a couple more beats. 656 00:37:09,021 --> 00:37:11,355 This is gold. Just give me one more second. 657 00:37:11,356 --> 00:37:13,566 One inch closer to your face. 658 00:37:13,567 --> 00:37:15,402 Get it right up in there! 659 00:37:15,986 --> 00:37:18,197 You're a hero! No! 660 00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:20,449 No! 661 00:37:39,551 --> 00:37:42,930 Oh, shit. 662 00:37:47,142 --> 00:37:49,811 I know you think this is strange. 663 00:37:51,605 --> 00:37:54,942 A grown man getting emotional over some dead snake. 664 00:37:55,442 --> 00:37:56,527 Jesus. 665 00:37:57,069 --> 00:37:59,111 But I loved him, 666 00:37:59,112 --> 00:38:02,115 and he loved me back, whatever way he could. 667 00:38:05,494 --> 00:38:08,205 God. No! 668 00:38:09,289 --> 00:38:10,958 Why is Kenny crying? 669 00:38:14,670 --> 00:38:17,463 Hey. I don't want you here. Not for this! 670 00:38:17,464 --> 00:38:19,090 He tried to murder me. 671 00:38:19,091 --> 00:38:20,174 - Griff? - What? 672 00:38:20,175 --> 00:38:22,927 - Let the man grieve. - You murdered my friend. 673 00:38:22,928 --> 00:38:24,303 Just get out of my face. 674 00:38:24,304 --> 00:38:27,348 - What... Where am I supposed to go? - Griff! Go! Just move! 675 00:38:27,349 --> 00:38:28,350 Fine! 676 00:38:49,621 --> 00:38:54,710 Go in peace, my friend 677 00:38:57,087 --> 00:39:02,592 May the divine snakes welcome you 678 00:39:02,593 --> 00:39:06,096 My dear friend 679 00:39:06,805 --> 00:39:10,391 - Snakedy snake - Snakedy snake, yeah 680 00:39:10,392 --> 00:39:13,936 Snakedy snake 681 00:39:13,937 --> 00:39:17,815 May the divine snakes 682 00:39:17,816 --> 00:39:22,279 Welcome you, welcome you... 683 00:39:22,988 --> 00:39:24,531 What do you see? 684 00:39:25,699 --> 00:39:28,660 They're doing some sort of weird snake funeral. 685 00:39:29,453 --> 00:39:31,496 Snake funeral? 686 00:39:55,812 --> 00:39:59,024 Sorry, I thought I heard something. 687 00:40:20,754 --> 00:40:21,797 Timo? 688 00:40:23,841 --> 00:40:24,925 Timo! 689 00:40:38,856 --> 00:40:41,858 - No. Not you. No. Just-- - I know, I'm sorry... I don't mean-- 690 00:40:41,859 --> 00:40:44,360 - I'm not trying to disturb you. - Just leave me alone. 691 00:40:44,361 --> 00:40:45,903 I'm sorry for your loss. 692 00:40:45,904 --> 00:40:48,823 I know you don't believe me, but it's true. I really am. 693 00:40:48,824 --> 00:40:53,078 A friend of mine died once too, and it hurts. 694 00:40:54,997 --> 00:40:55,998 Was it a snake? 695 00:40:56,582 --> 00:40:57,833 Was it a snake? 696 00:40:59,334 --> 00:41:00,626 No. 697 00:41:00,627 --> 00:41:04,548 It was just a... human person. 698 00:41:05,841 --> 00:41:07,301 Yeah, still sad, right? 699 00:41:08,677 --> 00:41:11,847 Totally. Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. 700 00:41:12,890 --> 00:41:13,891 Beer? 701 00:41:14,766 --> 00:41:18,769 Well, I have my pills here, but, yeah. Let's mix it up. 702 00:41:18,770 --> 00:41:23,275 A few commercials, TV. Did a few episodes of S.W.A.T. 703 00:41:24,401 --> 00:41:25,484 - S.W.A.T.? - Yeah. 704 00:41:25,485 --> 00:41:26,569 I like that one. 705 00:41:26,570 --> 00:41:30,990 I swear, I even had the last line-- Thanks. 706 00:41:30,991 --> 00:41:32,408 The last-- Thanks. 707 00:41:32,409 --> 00:41:34,869 - Last line of season three. - So, what happened? 708 00:41:34,870 --> 00:41:37,955 Well, the producers decided that they didn't really need that character, 709 00:41:37,956 --> 00:41:39,458 so they got rid of me. 710 00:41:40,584 --> 00:41:44,004 I mean, it's only been going about eight or nine more seasons. 711 00:41:45,464 --> 00:41:46,507 They don't deserve you. 712 00:41:47,382 --> 00:41:48,634 Yeah, you're a star. 713 00:41:51,011 --> 00:41:53,514 - Thank you. - Yeah. You've been in movies? 714 00:41:54,097 --> 00:41:57,099 - I'm in an industrial... - You know what movie I like? 715 00:41:57,100 --> 00:41:59,645 - What? - The Legend of Bagger Vance. 716 00:42:00,854 --> 00:42:04,106 - You should do a movie like that. - Man, I wish. 717 00:42:04,107 --> 00:42:04,942 Yeah. 718 00:42:06,568 --> 00:42:09,153 - I like you. - I like you too. 719 00:42:09,154 --> 00:42:10,446 - You know what? - What? 720 00:42:10,447 --> 00:42:13,616 I'll get a new snake for your movie now. 721 00:42:13,617 --> 00:42:14,867 - Really? - Yes. 722 00:42:14,868 --> 00:42:16,953 Oh, my God. Thank you so much. 723 00:42:16,954 --> 00:42:19,039 Yeah. You come with me, of course. 724 00:42:20,541 --> 00:42:21,375 What? 725 00:42:23,710 --> 00:42:27,339 Should we be in here? Maybe we should head back. 726 00:42:32,386 --> 00:42:35,013 What was that? What was that? 727 00:42:37,432 --> 00:42:38,267 Listen. 728 00:42:39,393 --> 00:42:40,727 There are snakes around here. 729 00:42:41,228 --> 00:42:42,354 I can feel it. 730 00:42:43,605 --> 00:42:44,773 What does it feel like? 731 00:42:45,691 --> 00:42:48,734 I don't know. It's just very snaky. 732 00:42:48,735 --> 00:42:50,612 What's-- It's snaky? 733 00:42:58,161 --> 00:43:01,456 They hear from vibrations on the ground. 734 00:43:03,584 --> 00:43:05,961 Every step we take, 735 00:43:06,628 --> 00:43:08,922 drawing them closer. 736 00:43:10,257 --> 00:43:12,634 And when the jungle goes quiet... 737 00:43:16,180 --> 00:43:18,182 that's when you know they're close. 738 00:43:25,939 --> 00:43:27,065 Yeah. 739 00:43:34,990 --> 00:43:38,034 Hey, maybe we should go back to the boat, huh? 740 00:43:38,035 --> 00:43:40,495 Think it'd be a good idea to go back to the boat. Let's go back to the boat. 741 00:43:42,247 --> 00:43:43,457 Santiago. 742 00:43:44,249 --> 00:43:45,292 Santiago. 743 00:43:46,668 --> 00:43:47,794 Santiago! 744 00:43:52,007 --> 00:43:53,008 Nope. 745 00:44:16,031 --> 00:44:17,533 Where are you? 746 00:44:35,175 --> 00:44:38,010 Hey. Have you seen Santiago? I don't think he's come back. 747 00:44:38,011 --> 00:44:42,098 - Back? From what? - We went out to go get a new snake. We-- 748 00:44:42,099 --> 00:44:44,684 You went to find a snake in the middle of the night? 749 00:44:44,685 --> 00:44:47,019 Yeah, we need one for the movie. It was dark. We got separated. 750 00:44:47,020 --> 00:44:48,187 It was crazy out there. 751 00:44:48,188 --> 00:44:49,689 - Griff, Griff, Griff, Griff. - What? 752 00:44:49,690 --> 00:44:52,859 You went out in the middle of the night to find a juicy snake in the jungle? 753 00:44:52,860 --> 00:44:54,486 You know what that's called? 754 00:44:55,529 --> 00:44:56,530 Producing. 755 00:44:57,531 --> 00:45:00,116 - Really? - I guarantee he will be back 756 00:45:00,117 --> 00:45:04,954 with a giant snake, and you and I are making movies. 757 00:45:04,955 --> 00:45:07,540 You're right. Santiago's a pro. He'll be fine. 758 00:45:07,541 --> 00:45:09,877 If he's not back soon, we'll go look for him. 759 00:45:32,649 --> 00:45:35,360 Thank you very much, Santiago. 760 00:45:38,864 --> 00:45:41,240 Guys, it's been over an hour. I have to go find him. 761 00:45:41,241 --> 00:45:42,909 Well, you're not going alone. 762 00:45:42,910 --> 00:45:45,078 Yeah, we're definitely coming with you. It's safer that way. 763 00:45:45,579 --> 00:45:47,414 Have you guys tried this thing? 764 00:45:47,956 --> 00:45:53,670 It's like a warm bowl of soup but... but in chair form. 765 00:45:54,338 --> 00:45:55,756 Yeah, man. Chairs. 766 00:45:56,632 --> 00:45:58,175 They, like, hold you, man. 767 00:45:58,926 --> 00:46:01,261 They literally have arms, right? 768 00:46:03,597 --> 00:46:04,723 Wow. 769 00:46:05,349 --> 00:46:07,142 Like when your parents are gone... 770 00:46:10,354 --> 00:46:12,105 we still have chairs, you know? 771 00:46:14,024 --> 00:46:16,317 What the hell are you talking about? 772 00:46:16,318 --> 00:46:18,236 Let's go find Santiago. 773 00:46:18,237 --> 00:46:20,196 Let's get a snake for our snake movie. 774 00:46:20,197 --> 00:46:22,282 Yeah, Santiago! Let's go! 775 00:46:29,790 --> 00:46:33,085 Hey, what direction are we headed in? 776 00:46:35,504 --> 00:46:36,713 Like, that way. 777 00:46:37,256 --> 00:46:39,882 Wait. Kenny, are you high right now? 778 00:46:39,883 --> 00:46:42,009 Yeah, but I'm good. I already peaked. 779 00:46:42,010 --> 00:46:43,386 Jesus Christ, Kenny. 780 00:46:43,387 --> 00:46:44,888 We're completely lost. 781 00:46:47,474 --> 00:46:49,810 Wait. You guys, this way. 782 00:46:50,394 --> 00:46:52,187 It looks like an old camper van. 783 00:47:09,746 --> 00:47:11,289 Ana is not on the boat. 784 00:47:11,290 --> 00:47:14,834 I need you to search the area. 785 00:47:14,835 --> 00:47:17,253 The men are scared to go deeper into the jungle. 786 00:47:17,254 --> 00:47:19,548 I don't care, we have to find her. 787 00:47:24,636 --> 00:47:25,928 What is that? 788 00:47:25,929 --> 00:47:28,556 Maybe Santiago's sleeping in there. 789 00:47:28,557 --> 00:47:29,558 Hola. 790 00:47:34,313 --> 00:47:37,274 Looks totally abandoned. Anybody home? 791 00:47:43,405 --> 00:47:45,031 Maybe some food and water. 792 00:47:45,032 --> 00:47:46,490 Yeah. We could stay here. 793 00:47:46,491 --> 00:47:47,618 At least tonight. 794 00:47:52,706 --> 00:47:56,126 Oh, man, there's gotta be snacks in here. 795 00:48:25,072 --> 00:48:26,322 Oh, my God. 796 00:48:26,323 --> 00:48:27,448 - Oh, God. - Santiago! 797 00:48:27,449 --> 00:48:28,659 Oh, God. 798 00:48:29,326 --> 00:48:30,327 Dang! 799 00:48:31,328 --> 00:48:32,995 That's where that guy went! 800 00:48:32,996 --> 00:48:34,831 Oh, my God. What is out there? 801 00:48:45,926 --> 00:48:47,885 - We gotta go now! - Okay. Go, go, go. 802 00:48:47,886 --> 00:48:49,804 - Let's get out of here. - Let's go, let's go. 803 00:48:49,805 --> 00:48:51,973 - We can't let it crush the van. - Crush the van? 804 00:48:51,974 --> 00:48:53,724 - It's not working. - What? 805 00:48:53,725 --> 00:48:54,809 - It's not-- - Damn it! 806 00:48:54,810 --> 00:48:56,561 - It's a camper van, probably! - Oh, God! 807 00:48:56,562 --> 00:48:58,771 It's got a split-charge battery. 808 00:48:58,772 --> 00:49:01,232 The relay probably popped off. It's underneath the hood. 809 00:49:01,233 --> 00:49:02,650 Kenny, can you fix it? 810 00:49:02,651 --> 00:49:05,027 Usually I could fix it, yes, but I'm having-- 811 00:49:05,028 --> 00:49:08,239 I'm still having some visual problems because of the... 812 00:49:08,240 --> 00:49:09,740 You did it to me again. 813 00:49:09,741 --> 00:49:14,453 You did it on the wedding video and now you're wasted off your ass again. 814 00:49:14,454 --> 00:49:16,455 I'm really sorry, boss. 815 00:49:16,456 --> 00:49:19,750 Buffalo sober. You're Buffalo sober. 816 00:49:19,751 --> 00:49:20,835 Do you have any more? 817 00:49:20,836 --> 00:49:23,045 Griff, please can you fix it? 818 00:49:23,046 --> 00:49:25,047 I think I'm better suited to be our wheel man. 819 00:49:25,048 --> 00:49:27,175 What are you talking about? I've always been a better driver than you. 820 00:49:27,176 --> 00:49:28,217 No, you've been a safer driver. 821 00:49:28,218 --> 00:49:30,386 I passed the driver's test on my first try. 822 00:49:30,387 --> 00:49:31,804 You took three times. 823 00:49:31,805 --> 00:49:33,306 Yeah, but that was 'cause of yield. 824 00:49:33,307 --> 00:49:35,099 I didn't know-- Now I know what that is. 825 00:49:35,100 --> 00:49:37,311 Oh, my God. We're gonna die. 826 00:49:39,479 --> 00:49:40,522 Sorry. 827 00:49:42,316 --> 00:49:43,358 I'll just fix it. 828 00:51:00,060 --> 00:51:01,436 - Doug! - Go, go, go! 829 00:51:02,229 --> 00:51:03,814 Let me get up. Hey, wait! Stop! Stop! 830 00:51:04,314 --> 00:51:06,692 Griff, where are you going? Don't leave without me! 831 00:51:09,820 --> 00:51:10,988 Oh, shit! 832 00:51:13,824 --> 00:51:15,032 You saw it, right? 833 00:51:15,033 --> 00:51:16,784 What was that? They're not supposed to get that big. 834 00:51:16,785 --> 00:51:18,912 Oh, God. It was like a dinosaur. 835 00:51:23,917 --> 00:51:24,918 Hey! 836 00:51:27,754 --> 00:51:29,714 Hey, maybe we can ask these guys for help. 837 00:51:29,715 --> 00:51:30,631 - Hey! - Hey! 838 00:51:30,632 --> 00:51:32,967 - We have to stop. - Do not stop the car. 839 00:51:32,968 --> 00:51:34,343 Ana, what is going on? 840 00:51:34,344 --> 00:51:37,305 They're illegal gold miners who patrol the jungles around here. 841 00:51:37,306 --> 00:51:38,764 These guys are dangerous. 842 00:51:38,765 --> 00:51:41,684 They'll kill anyone who crosses into their territory. 843 00:51:41,685 --> 00:51:43,896 - Oh, shit. They're trying to kill us. - Fuck! 844 00:51:44,688 --> 00:51:46,273 Why are they shooting at us? 845 00:51:48,066 --> 00:51:49,735 Griff, can't you drive any faster. 846 00:51:53,155 --> 00:51:54,406 Ana, what are you doing? 847 00:51:58,410 --> 00:52:00,913 - Kenny, are you getting this? - Yes! 848 00:52:02,247 --> 00:52:03,582 Keep rolling! 849 00:52:06,710 --> 00:52:08,962 Griff, faster. 850 00:52:12,216 --> 00:52:13,592 Only one left. 851 00:52:37,199 --> 00:52:39,242 - Where is she? - Oh, my God. 852 00:52:39,243 --> 00:52:40,285 Where is she? 853 00:52:43,372 --> 00:52:45,289 Who? Who do... Who do you mean? 854 00:52:45,290 --> 00:52:46,874 I know there's someone else here. 855 00:52:46,875 --> 00:52:49,586 So, where is she-- 856 00:52:54,466 --> 00:52:55,467 Let's go, come on. 857 00:52:56,009 --> 00:52:57,135 We gotta go. Fast. 858 00:52:59,179 --> 00:53:01,180 Look, I can get you guys out of here. 859 00:53:01,181 --> 00:53:03,308 All we need to do is keep heading north. 860 00:53:03,809 --> 00:53:07,103 There's a small airport about a day and a half from here. 861 00:53:07,104 --> 00:53:08,896 You can get us home? 862 00:53:08,897 --> 00:53:10,606 - Yes. - Get us home. 863 00:53:10,607 --> 00:53:11,900 I think we gotta call it. 864 00:53:12,484 --> 00:53:15,237 Man, we've got such good stuff, and we're so close. 865 00:53:15,737 --> 00:53:18,865 Really? We're going home? 866 00:53:18,866 --> 00:53:19,949 Buddy, I know. 867 00:53:19,950 --> 00:53:22,535 I don't wanna go home empty-handed either. 868 00:53:22,536 --> 00:53:25,247 But we came out here to make Anaconda, 869 00:53:25,747 --> 00:53:26,957 and now we're in it. 870 00:53:30,502 --> 00:53:31,545 Yeah. 871 00:53:35,340 --> 00:53:36,466 I'm sorry. 872 00:54:15,672 --> 00:54:18,925 Guys, emergency meeting. 873 00:54:18,926 --> 00:54:20,927 Cast and crew only. Kenny, sit down. 874 00:54:20,928 --> 00:54:22,762 - What is that? - New pages. 875 00:54:22,763 --> 00:54:24,555 We have some time before the next port 876 00:54:24,556 --> 00:54:28,935 and I had an idea last night that I think is just too damn good not to shoot. 877 00:54:28,936 --> 00:54:31,729 Doug, everybody's pretty burnt, man. 878 00:54:31,730 --> 00:54:33,981 Just hear me out. I'm begging you please, Kenny. 879 00:54:33,982 --> 00:54:36,067 - All right. Sorry, boss. - Thank you. 880 00:54:36,068 --> 00:54:39,028 What if you two, on your way to find the anaconda, 881 00:54:39,029 --> 00:54:42,115 ran into a total badass on an incredible quest? 882 00:54:43,158 --> 00:54:44,408 That's interesting. 883 00:54:44,409 --> 00:54:47,912 Let me guess, to expose illegal gold miners? 884 00:54:47,913 --> 00:54:48,829 Bingo. 885 00:54:48,830 --> 00:54:50,957 - Raises the stakes. - Exactly. 886 00:54:50,958 --> 00:54:52,959 And while they're hunting down this mythical snake, 887 00:54:52,960 --> 00:54:55,045 they actually end up fighting the real villain. 888 00:54:55,629 --> 00:54:56,712 An even bigger snake. 889 00:54:56,713 --> 00:54:59,257 - Man. - Oh, yeah. Yes. 890 00:54:59,258 --> 00:55:00,550 Man. 891 00:55:00,551 --> 00:55:01,969 I like this. 892 00:55:02,594 --> 00:55:03,594 This is good. 893 00:55:03,595 --> 00:55:06,765 And if we add this element, it does make the movie much bigger. 894 00:55:07,266 --> 00:55:09,726 Like, now, it's about something. 895 00:55:11,854 --> 00:55:12,771 Themes. 896 00:55:13,397 --> 00:55:14,523 Themes. 897 00:55:21,947 --> 00:55:23,239 Yeah. 898 00:55:23,240 --> 00:55:25,116 Okay. You know what, guys? 899 00:55:25,117 --> 00:55:27,703 I didn't wanna say anything before, but... 900 00:55:29,872 --> 00:55:31,582 this thing might be an Awards play. 901 00:55:33,417 --> 00:55:36,377 I mean, the Academy loves social horror. 902 00:55:36,378 --> 00:55:37,462 - Right? - Yeah. 903 00:55:38,881 --> 00:55:42,509 Dude, you could be the white Jordan Peele. 904 00:55:43,552 --> 00:55:45,262 I was thinking the same thing. 905 00:55:48,599 --> 00:55:50,309 We've been through so much, you guys. 906 00:55:50,934 --> 00:55:52,644 Let's finish this movie. 907 00:55:54,938 --> 00:55:56,355 I'm in. 908 00:55:56,356 --> 00:55:58,066 - Let's do it. - Yeah. 909 00:55:58,609 --> 00:56:02,988 Who are you gonna get to play this new, awesome character? 910 00:56:10,245 --> 00:56:12,288 And cut. Yes! 911 00:56:12,289 --> 00:56:13,831 - Was it good? - That's what I'm talking about. 912 00:56:13,832 --> 00:56:14,749 - Nice. - Yeah. 913 00:56:14,750 --> 00:56:17,126 - You sure you've never acted before? - I swear. 914 00:56:17,127 --> 00:56:18,921 Some of the best acting I've ever seen. 915 00:56:19,546 --> 00:56:22,131 - You're a natural. You're incredible. - Thank you. 916 00:56:22,132 --> 00:56:23,800 Take five. Next up, we got 72. 917 00:56:24,635 --> 00:56:28,095 - Guys, you see what I'm saying? - Yeah. 918 00:56:28,096 --> 00:56:29,764 - She's incredible, right? - Yeah. 919 00:56:29,765 --> 00:56:31,600 Hey, a question, though. 920 00:56:32,518 --> 00:56:36,229 If she saves us, it doesn't really give my character anything to do. 921 00:56:36,230 --> 00:56:37,355 Yeah. 922 00:56:37,356 --> 00:56:41,484 This was supposed to be the moment where my character starts falling for Derek, 923 00:56:41,485 --> 00:56:45,488 so he needs to do something heroic, you know? Unselfish. 924 00:56:45,489 --> 00:56:48,115 I don't know, you guys, this just feels like her moment, 925 00:56:48,116 --> 00:56:50,202 she actually did it in real life. 926 00:56:50,744 --> 00:56:53,371 But good news, I'm gonna shoot all the rest on her 927 00:56:53,372 --> 00:56:55,123 so you guys have the day off. 928 00:56:55,624 --> 00:56:57,042 See you later. 929 00:56:58,126 --> 00:56:59,628 Take the day off. 930 00:57:08,053 --> 00:57:11,764 This is our movie, Griff, and he's just cutting us out. 931 00:57:11,765 --> 00:57:13,683 Yep. Welcome to show business, baby. 932 00:57:13,684 --> 00:57:16,937 You're not in it unless you're getting screwed over by your friends. 933 00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:19,565 Yeah. 934 00:57:21,483 --> 00:57:25,112 You ever wake up and wonder what the hell have I done with my life? 935 00:57:25,904 --> 00:57:28,573 Oh, yeah. Like, every day. 936 00:57:28,574 --> 00:57:31,158 Hey, at least you had the guts to go after what you wanted. 937 00:57:31,159 --> 00:57:33,036 - No. - You think I wanted to go to law school? 938 00:57:33,537 --> 00:57:35,413 What have I got to show for it though? 939 00:57:35,414 --> 00:57:36,497 You know what I have? 940 00:57:36,498 --> 00:57:40,377 I have a terrible apartment and a 74-year-old room-mate. 941 00:57:42,129 --> 00:57:45,465 Sometimes I go to Trader Joe's just to feel air conditioning. 942 00:57:47,092 --> 00:57:48,552 You at least have a career. 943 00:57:50,053 --> 00:57:52,055 I mean, what do I have to show for it? 944 00:57:53,265 --> 00:57:56,268 I've got no family. No career. 945 00:57:57,186 --> 00:57:59,103 Never done anything that matters. 946 00:57:59,104 --> 00:58:00,564 No nothing. 947 00:58:02,983 --> 00:58:04,193 It's never too late. 948 00:58:13,493 --> 00:58:15,161 Griff, I know you're in there. 949 00:58:15,162 --> 00:58:16,455 Let's make a movie. 950 00:58:20,959 --> 00:58:22,043 Hola, amigo. 951 00:58:22,044 --> 00:58:24,962 Jesus. Come on, get dressed. We've got a packed day. 952 00:58:24,963 --> 00:58:28,674 What are you talking about? I am dressed. I'm dressed really... very nicely. 953 00:58:28,675 --> 00:58:30,635 All right. Can you just take a cold shower? 954 00:58:30,636 --> 00:58:32,053 We gotta film, like, now. 955 00:58:32,054 --> 00:58:34,056 Here's an idea. You know what you should call the movie? 956 00:58:34,556 --> 00:58:36,600 Ana-conda. Get it? 957 00:58:37,100 --> 00:58:39,060 Ana-conda, 'cause of Ana. 958 00:58:39,061 --> 00:58:41,062 Can you just get in costume? 959 00:58:41,063 --> 00:58:43,524 Man, you know what? You wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for me. 960 00:58:44,024 --> 00:58:45,858 Without me, you'd still be stuck in Buffalo 961 00:58:45,859 --> 00:58:48,153 shooting your bullshit wedding videos. 962 00:58:49,196 --> 00:58:50,112 Films. 963 00:58:50,113 --> 00:58:52,031 Yeah, you can tell yourself that. 964 00:58:52,032 --> 00:58:54,909 My God, you know what? I vouched for you too. 965 00:58:54,910 --> 00:58:57,203 Even the rights holders, they're like, "Who is this guy?" 966 00:58:57,204 --> 00:58:58,789 I said, "Trust me. He's good." 967 00:59:00,749 --> 00:59:01,750 What is that? 968 00:59:05,671 --> 00:59:10,633 Attention, all crew. Let's get prepped for scene 85, location Bravo. 969 00:59:10,634 --> 00:59:12,051 Five minutes. 970 00:59:12,052 --> 00:59:15,221 - Are they making a movie? - Five minutes to arrival. 971 00:59:15,222 --> 00:59:18,516 Excuse me, are you guys shooting a movie? 972 00:59:18,517 --> 00:59:20,644 We're doing a reboot of Anaconda. 973 00:59:21,436 --> 00:59:22,437 Come again? 974 00:59:22,980 --> 00:59:25,732 - A reboot of Anaconda. - Anaconda? 975 00:59:26,233 --> 00:59:28,484 - Like, Ice Cube Anaconda? - Yeah. 976 00:59:28,485 --> 00:59:30,112 Sony is rebooting it. 977 00:59:30,654 --> 00:59:33,073 I know. No new ideas. 978 00:59:47,129 --> 00:59:48,505 That's weird. 979 00:59:50,632 --> 00:59:52,009 So, let me get this straight. 980 00:59:52,634 --> 00:59:55,179 You don't have the rights to Anaconda? 981 00:59:56,388 --> 00:59:57,389 No, well, I... 982 00:59:58,599 --> 00:59:59,892 Not legally. 983 01:00:00,601 --> 01:00:03,604 And you've never owned the rights to Anaconda? 984 01:00:06,481 --> 01:00:08,149 I mean, who owns Anaconda? 985 01:00:08,150 --> 01:00:11,027 Sony. Sony owns Anaconda. 986 01:00:11,028 --> 01:00:12,278 Yeah, no, no, I know. I know. 987 01:00:12,279 --> 01:00:15,281 I mean, like, you know, like, in the larger sense. 988 01:00:15,282 --> 01:00:17,742 Why would you tell us that you had the rights 989 01:00:17,743 --> 01:00:20,328 to the goddamn Anaconda franchise 990 01:00:20,329 --> 01:00:25,208 when you very much don't have the rights to the goddamn Anaconda franchise? 991 01:00:25,209 --> 01:00:28,044 Do we really even need the rights? 992 01:00:28,045 --> 01:00:29,588 Really? I mean, like, who gives a shit? 993 01:00:31,507 --> 01:00:33,257 - About IP? - Yeah. 994 01:00:33,258 --> 01:00:34,801 Literally everyone. 995 01:00:35,469 --> 01:00:38,554 That's what big movies are! That's why we're here! 996 01:00:38,555 --> 01:00:41,182 - You think that's why we're here? - Yes, that's why we're here! 997 01:00:41,183 --> 01:00:42,642 We almost died! 998 01:00:42,643 --> 01:00:46,604 We're out in the middle of the goddamn jungle for a lie! 999 01:00:46,605 --> 01:00:48,148 I had to lie! 1000 01:00:49,024 --> 01:00:51,192 I had to lie to you! You wouldn't have come otherwise! 1001 01:00:51,193 --> 01:00:53,028 You wouldn't... None of you would have-- 1002 01:00:53,904 --> 01:00:55,863 - Bullshit! - Not bullshit. 1003 01:00:55,864 --> 01:00:58,199 It's why you never came out to LA with me in the first place, 1004 01:00:58,200 --> 01:01:01,244 even though we had a whole plan to work together. 1005 01:01:01,245 --> 01:01:04,248 Your whole life, you've just-- it's been dictated by fear. 1006 01:01:06,124 --> 01:01:07,125 Griff, 1007 01:01:08,752 --> 01:01:09,795 you're fired. 1008 01:01:10,504 --> 01:01:12,172 - What? - You're fired. 1009 01:01:15,217 --> 01:01:16,384 No. No, I'm not. 1010 01:01:16,385 --> 01:01:18,095 You can't fire me. You know why? 1011 01:01:18,846 --> 01:01:20,639 Because I quit already. 1012 01:01:21,598 --> 01:01:22,474 Last night. 1013 01:01:25,853 --> 01:01:27,354 I just didn't tell anybody yet. 1014 01:01:28,480 --> 01:01:29,481 So... 1015 01:01:32,025 --> 01:01:34,611 Too bad for you, I guess, because I already quit. 1016 01:01:49,543 --> 01:01:51,003 Griff, wait! 1017 01:01:51,920 --> 01:01:53,754 Where are you even gonna go? 1018 01:01:53,755 --> 01:01:55,256 To find the Anaconda boat. 1019 01:01:55,257 --> 01:01:56,674 Maybe they can help me get home. 1020 01:01:56,675 --> 01:01:59,010 Just think about this. It's not safe. 1021 01:01:59,011 --> 01:02:00,469 That's a tiny boat. 1022 01:02:00,470 --> 01:02:02,347 There's a giant snake out there. 1023 01:02:05,142 --> 01:02:06,685 Please don't do this. 1024 01:02:09,646 --> 01:02:10,856 Griff. 1025 01:02:53,482 --> 01:02:54,525 J.Lo? 1026 01:02:55,108 --> 01:02:56,193 Ice Cube? 1027 01:02:57,819 --> 01:03:00,863 Jon Voight? Are you in this one? 1028 01:03:00,864 --> 01:03:01,989 Help me! 1029 01:03:01,990 --> 01:03:03,366 Help me, man! Help me! 1030 01:03:03,367 --> 01:03:04,700 - Hey! - Help me! 1031 01:03:04,701 --> 01:03:06,911 - It's okay. It's okay. - Help! Help me! 1032 01:03:06,912 --> 01:03:08,579 - Calm down. I'll come get you. - Oh, my... 1033 01:03:08,580 --> 01:03:10,623 It's okay. You're safe. 1034 01:03:10,624 --> 01:03:11,959 - You're safe. - Oh, thank God. 1035 01:03:12,668 --> 01:03:14,878 Oh, shit! Oh, God! 1036 01:03:20,217 --> 01:03:21,218 Oh, God! 1037 01:03:22,886 --> 01:03:26,056 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1038 01:03:28,684 --> 01:03:29,685 Doug! 1039 01:03:30,185 --> 01:03:32,395 Doug, what's going on? Why have we stopped? 1040 01:03:32,396 --> 01:03:36,357 Well, Ana found a great place to shoot the next scene. 1041 01:03:36,358 --> 01:03:37,733 - To shoot? - The next scene? What? 1042 01:03:37,734 --> 01:03:40,403 Look. Look, okay, I know. Losing Griff was hard, 1043 01:03:40,404 --> 01:03:42,905 but between the four of us, we can finish this film. 1044 01:03:42,906 --> 01:03:44,282 I'm not going home empty-handed. 1045 01:03:44,283 --> 01:03:46,576 Come on, man. Without Griff... 1046 01:03:46,577 --> 01:03:48,202 That's not part of the plan. 1047 01:03:48,203 --> 01:03:51,122 Well, plans change and that's part of film-making too. 1048 01:03:51,123 --> 01:03:53,207 No, no, Doug, we have to go back for him. 1049 01:03:53,208 --> 01:03:54,625 - He's not safe out there. - Yeah. 1050 01:03:54,626 --> 01:03:56,377 Ana. We need to turn the boat around. 1051 01:03:56,378 --> 01:03:58,212 We are not turning the boat around. 1052 01:03:58,213 --> 01:04:00,047 Yeah, we're not turning the boat around. 1053 01:04:00,048 --> 01:04:02,466 Everyone off the boat now. 1054 01:04:02,467 --> 01:04:03,343 What's going on? 1055 01:04:05,053 --> 01:04:07,221 Ana, what are you doing? 1056 01:04:07,222 --> 01:04:08,973 This definitely isn't the plan. 1057 01:04:08,974 --> 01:04:10,933 Well, plans change, Doug. 1058 01:04:10,934 --> 01:04:12,477 Isn't that film-making? 1059 01:04:13,437 --> 01:04:15,564 And every good film needs a bit of a twist. 1060 01:04:16,273 --> 01:04:19,026 Everyone off the boat now! 1061 01:05:11,370 --> 01:05:12,371 To the dock. 1062 01:05:38,939 --> 01:05:41,232 You're gonna carry these for me back to the boat. Let's go. 1063 01:05:41,233 --> 01:05:42,276 And then what? 1064 01:05:43,318 --> 01:05:44,610 And then you're gonna shoot us? 1065 01:05:44,611 --> 01:05:45,654 Now! 1066 01:05:47,155 --> 01:05:48,322 I'm not going anywhere 1067 01:05:48,323 --> 01:05:50,616 until you tell me what's inside these bags. 1068 01:05:50,617 --> 01:05:52,995 You wanna look at it? Look at it. 1069 01:06:00,669 --> 01:06:02,963 Wait. Is... Is that... 1070 01:06:04,423 --> 01:06:05,506 Gold? 1071 01:06:05,507 --> 01:06:08,467 So you're the miner? You did all of this for money? 1072 01:06:08,468 --> 01:06:09,553 Very quick, Claire. 1073 01:06:11,513 --> 01:06:12,556 No! 1074 01:06:13,390 --> 01:06:15,516 I'm not gonna be part of your sick quest for-- 1075 01:06:15,517 --> 01:06:16,392 Holy shit. 1076 01:06:16,393 --> 01:06:17,269 Drop it. 1077 01:06:17,769 --> 01:06:18,937 Drop the gun. 1078 01:06:19,521 --> 01:06:20,772 The gun. 1079 01:06:22,608 --> 01:06:23,358 Now! 1080 01:06:23,483 --> 01:06:24,651 Calm down. 1081 01:06:28,572 --> 01:06:30,032 And you, don't move! 1082 01:06:34,411 --> 01:06:35,661 I'm with the government. 1083 01:06:35,662 --> 01:06:37,705 We track illegal gold miners. 1084 01:06:37,706 --> 01:06:40,709 And Ana here runs one of the biggest rings in Brazil. 1085 01:06:41,710 --> 01:06:43,628 This gold can change your life. 1086 01:06:43,629 --> 01:06:45,505 You think I care about gold? 1087 01:06:45,506 --> 01:06:46,756 Don't trust anything she says. 1088 01:06:46,757 --> 01:06:48,883 She's a liar. She's a damn liar. 1089 01:06:48,884 --> 01:06:50,593 We're film-makers from Buffalo. 1090 01:06:50,594 --> 01:06:53,095 We're working on a spiritual sequel to Anaconda, 1091 01:06:53,096 --> 01:06:55,806 and I don't know if she mentioned that, but it's not just a reboot, 1092 01:06:55,807 --> 01:06:57,683 and I kicked out my friend who had the lead, 1093 01:06:57,684 --> 01:06:59,977 and I gave her a juicy-ass role, 1094 01:06:59,978 --> 01:07:01,229 - and this is how she treats-- - Really juicy! 1095 01:07:01,230 --> 01:07:03,940 Shut up! I don't know what you're talking about, man. 1096 01:07:03,941 --> 01:07:05,983 Off-topic. Go, arrest her. 1097 01:07:05,984 --> 01:07:07,069 Thank God. 1098 01:07:20,374 --> 01:07:21,500 Oh, my God! 1099 01:07:23,752 --> 01:07:25,379 Who shot me? 1100 01:07:26,839 --> 01:07:28,381 That'd be me, asshole. 1101 01:07:28,382 --> 01:07:31,050 Griff, no. He was a good guy. 1102 01:07:31,051 --> 01:07:33,010 - I'm a good guy. - He's a cop. 1103 01:07:33,011 --> 01:07:34,054 Look, I don't-- What? 1104 01:07:35,681 --> 01:07:37,139 I'm a good guy. 1105 01:07:37,140 --> 01:07:39,685 Drop it. On your knees now, the four of you, facing the water. 1106 01:07:41,520 --> 01:07:42,980 - Wait. I-- - Now. 1107 01:07:57,202 --> 01:07:59,996 No, no, Ana. Don't do this. 1108 01:07:59,997 --> 01:08:01,789 You too, Claire. On your knees, now. 1109 01:08:01,790 --> 01:08:03,458 You don't have to be this person. 1110 01:08:04,710 --> 01:08:08,005 I have children at home. They're 10 and 13. 1111 01:08:08,505 --> 01:08:09,506 Please. 1112 01:08:10,048 --> 01:08:11,340 Please. 1113 01:08:11,341 --> 01:08:13,342 Think about what you're doing to my kids. 1114 01:08:13,343 --> 01:08:15,345 Just shut your mouth. Turn around now. 1115 01:08:23,228 --> 01:08:24,396 On your knees. 1116 01:08:25,189 --> 01:08:26,398 Now! 1117 01:08:28,483 --> 01:08:30,443 - Toma! - Toma! 1118 01:08:30,444 --> 01:08:32,613 Eat that shit! Nice! 1119 01:08:33,113 --> 01:08:35,866 For the record, that's how you headbutt, bitch! 1120 01:08:40,412 --> 01:08:41,496 You won't do it. 1121 01:08:41,997 --> 01:08:43,831 You don't have the balls. I know you, Claire. 1122 01:08:43,832 --> 01:08:44,875 You don't know me. 1123 01:08:45,375 --> 01:08:46,585 I don't even have kids. 1124 01:08:54,217 --> 01:08:55,427 Jesus Christ! 1125 01:09:01,766 --> 01:09:04,685 - A snake! - No. No, wait. Wait. 1126 01:09:04,686 --> 01:09:06,270 I think the boat is back that way! 1127 01:09:06,271 --> 01:09:08,397 Yeah, but then so is the snake. We can't go that way! 1128 01:09:08,398 --> 01:09:10,899 We gotta take this trail and get to the high ground. 1129 01:09:10,900 --> 01:09:13,152 - Wait. What's that? - What? 1130 01:09:13,153 --> 01:09:14,654 What? 1131 01:09:14,655 --> 01:09:15,655 Shit! 1132 01:09:16,323 --> 01:09:17,657 Oh, my God. 1133 01:09:17,658 --> 01:09:19,825 - Did it bite you? - Yeah, you know what, I think it bit me. 1134 01:09:19,826 --> 01:09:21,786 - I think it got me. - Dougie, I know it hurts, 1135 01:09:21,787 --> 01:09:24,872 but we gotta get out of here now because the snake is out there! 1136 01:09:24,873 --> 01:09:27,917 I'm sorry, I can't move. My leg is freaking out. 1137 01:09:27,918 --> 01:09:29,670 What are we gonna do? 1138 01:09:30,212 --> 01:09:31,755 We're gonna have to piss on you, man. 1139 01:09:32,338 --> 01:09:35,131 - Huh? - On the bite. It's the only way. 1140 01:09:35,132 --> 01:09:36,676 I thought that was just jellyfish. 1141 01:09:36,677 --> 01:09:39,345 No, no, no, no. It's all animals. 1142 01:09:39,346 --> 01:09:40,888 - Are you sure? - Positive. 1143 01:09:40,889 --> 01:09:43,015 Someone's gotta piss. I need one of your pisses. 1144 01:09:43,016 --> 01:09:45,142 I'd love to be able to help out, but I'm just-- 1145 01:09:45,143 --> 01:09:48,354 I am drained, tapped, bone-dry. 1146 01:09:48,355 --> 01:09:50,022 Claire, you wanna take care of this? 1147 01:09:50,023 --> 01:09:51,524 I'm wearing a onesie. 1148 01:09:51,525 --> 01:09:54,068 Kenny, we don't have time to argue about this. You're up. 1149 01:09:54,069 --> 01:09:55,779 You know this isn't possible. 1150 01:09:56,405 --> 01:09:57,530 Why not? 1151 01:09:57,531 --> 01:09:58,782 Because he's... 1152 01:09:59,825 --> 01:10:00,908 Pee shy. 1153 01:10:00,909 --> 01:10:03,119 - Pee shy? - I have urinary stage fright. 1154 01:10:03,120 --> 01:10:06,038 I haven't been able to pee in public in 35 years. 1155 01:10:06,039 --> 01:10:07,707 My life sucks! 1156 01:10:07,708 --> 01:10:08,791 You can do this. 1157 01:10:08,792 --> 01:10:10,294 You have to do this. 1158 01:10:10,919 --> 01:10:12,378 Whizz on me. 1159 01:10:12,379 --> 01:10:14,130 - You got it, buddy. - Okay. 1160 01:10:14,131 --> 01:10:17,049 - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah. 1161 01:10:17,050 --> 01:10:18,342 - You can do it. - You can do it. 1162 01:10:18,343 --> 01:10:20,803 - Let it flow. - Let it flow. Yeah. 1163 01:10:20,804 --> 01:10:23,139 Just piss on me. Come on. Whizz on me. 1164 01:10:23,140 --> 01:10:24,892 Whizz on me. Do it. Whizz on me. 1165 01:10:25,392 --> 01:10:27,561 You... You don't think I want to? 1166 01:10:28,687 --> 01:10:30,772 I would love to piss all over you, man. 1167 01:10:31,481 --> 01:10:33,107 But it's not in the cards! 1168 01:10:33,108 --> 01:10:35,401 - Whizz on me. Now. - I can't. I'm trying. 1169 01:10:35,402 --> 01:10:38,112 - You can do it! Whizz on me! - I'm trying my hardest! 1170 01:10:38,113 --> 01:10:41,949 - Do it, Ken! Do it, Ken. Do it. Do it. - That is an order! Whizz on me now! 1171 01:10:41,950 --> 01:10:44,285 Okay! Okay. 1172 01:10:44,286 --> 01:10:46,288 You got it, buddy. You do it. 1173 01:10:46,997 --> 01:10:49,415 - There's one more problem. - What? 1174 01:10:49,416 --> 01:10:51,417 I haven't told you about this. 1175 01:10:51,418 --> 01:10:53,211 I can only pee sitting down. 1176 01:10:53,212 --> 01:10:54,754 Jesus Christ! 1177 01:10:54,755 --> 01:10:56,256 I need a chair. 1178 01:10:58,467 --> 01:11:00,135 Come on, come on, come on. 1179 01:11:00,928 --> 01:11:02,386 Come on, buddy. 1180 01:11:02,387 --> 01:11:04,055 Come on, Kenny. Come on, come on. 1181 01:11:04,056 --> 01:11:05,306 Just do it. Do it! 1182 01:11:05,307 --> 01:11:06,933 - Come on, buddy. - Do it. 1183 01:11:06,934 --> 01:11:08,060 Come on, buddy. 1184 01:11:15,025 --> 01:11:17,401 - Yeah! - Yeah! 1185 01:11:17,402 --> 01:11:19,946 - Yes! Yes! Yes! - Nice! 1186 01:11:19,947 --> 01:11:23,075 - Yes! Yeah! - Yeah! Yeah! 1187 01:11:33,126 --> 01:11:36,839 Yeah! 1188 01:11:54,898 --> 01:11:59,111 Griff, I'm sorry about what I said before on the boat. 1189 01:11:59,778 --> 01:12:05,117 The truth is, I've been jealous of you for a long, long time. 1190 01:12:05,659 --> 01:12:06,576 Jealous? 1191 01:12:06,577 --> 01:12:08,870 For having the balls to do what I couldn't. 1192 01:12:08,871 --> 01:12:10,329 For going after what you wanted. 1193 01:12:10,330 --> 01:12:12,416 Going to LA and putting yourself on the-- 1194 01:12:15,335 --> 01:12:16,336 Oh, my God! 1195 01:12:16,461 --> 01:12:18,171 - Oh, shit! - Doug! 1196 01:12:18,172 --> 01:12:19,381 Oh, my God! 1197 01:12:21,258 --> 01:12:23,177 We have to go after him! 1198 01:12:23,719 --> 01:12:25,929 - We gotta get out of here. - We do not have a choice. Come on. 1199 01:12:36,940 --> 01:12:37,941 Griff. 1200 01:12:40,319 --> 01:12:41,320 Griff. 1201 01:12:44,448 --> 01:12:45,532 What did I do? 1202 01:12:46,700 --> 01:12:49,577 I tricked him into coming here, and now he's dead. 1203 01:12:49,578 --> 01:12:53,164 No. No. We all chose to be here. 1204 01:12:53,165 --> 01:12:54,374 I wish it was me. 1205 01:12:55,292 --> 01:12:56,501 It should be me. 1206 01:12:56,502 --> 01:12:59,086 This is not your fault, and we have to keep going. 1207 01:12:59,087 --> 01:13:03,300 Hey, guys, I think I found out which way we should go. 1208 01:13:17,564 --> 01:13:18,565 Hey. 1209 01:13:21,527 --> 01:13:22,610 It's a... 1210 01:13:22,611 --> 01:13:24,111 It's a big open field. 1211 01:13:24,112 --> 01:13:26,489 We gotta get across it to get to the boat. 1212 01:13:26,490 --> 01:13:27,949 But we can't just run across. 1213 01:13:27,950 --> 01:13:29,159 It's too exposed. 1214 01:13:29,826 --> 01:13:31,328 The snake could come from anywhere. 1215 01:13:32,704 --> 01:13:34,665 Maybe we can create a distraction. 1216 01:13:35,791 --> 01:13:39,002 Yeah, yeah, maybe, but, I mean, how do we do that? 1217 01:13:40,462 --> 01:13:42,339 I mean, it's gonna be so... What? 1218 01:13:56,520 --> 01:13:57,896 It's here. 1219 01:14:26,800 --> 01:14:27,801 What? 1220 01:14:28,677 --> 01:14:29,760 What? 1221 01:14:29,761 --> 01:14:32,764 Oh, my God. Doug. Doug, no. 1222 01:14:34,266 --> 01:14:35,809 Dougie. Dougie. 1223 01:14:36,310 --> 01:14:38,103 - Come on, man. - Is he... 1224 01:14:39,646 --> 01:14:41,106 Jesus Christ. 1225 01:14:45,903 --> 01:14:47,654 Wait. Wait. 1226 01:14:51,241 --> 01:14:53,869 Maybe Doug is the distraction. 1227 01:14:55,996 --> 01:14:57,079 How? 1228 01:14:57,080 --> 01:14:59,248 I know this is horrible, okay? 1229 01:14:59,249 --> 01:15:02,585 But if we can drag Doug out into the field, 1230 01:15:02,586 --> 01:15:03,962 prop him up 1231 01:15:04,671 --> 01:15:07,591 and attach the boar to his back 1232 01:15:08,133 --> 01:15:11,887 wouldn't we make it really hard for the snake to swallow him? 1233 01:15:12,846 --> 01:15:16,599 It'll occupy the snake long enough for us to get across the field 1234 01:15:16,600 --> 01:15:17,768 and get back to the boat. 1235 01:15:18,852 --> 01:15:20,729 It's a really smart idea. 1236 01:15:25,984 --> 01:15:27,109 Guys, this is horrible. 1237 01:15:27,110 --> 01:15:29,695 If it meant saving all of us, I'm sure Doug would've wanted this. 1238 01:15:29,696 --> 01:15:31,656 I'm not sure he would've wanted this. 1239 01:15:31,657 --> 01:15:32,615 Wait. 1240 01:15:32,616 --> 01:15:34,325 - We gotta go, guys. - What are you gonna do? 1241 01:15:34,326 --> 01:15:35,369 What are you doing? 1242 01:15:37,120 --> 01:15:39,206 Snakes, they love squirrel meat. 1243 01:15:56,431 --> 01:15:58,559 Wait, the snake is right behind him. 1244 01:16:14,241 --> 01:16:15,325 I can't... 1245 01:16:24,585 --> 01:16:25,836 Oh, shit! 1246 01:16:29,965 --> 01:16:32,133 - He's alive! He's alive! - He's alive! 1247 01:16:32,134 --> 01:16:34,135 - I thought you checked his pulse! - I did! 1248 01:16:34,136 --> 01:16:36,220 Well, you did a shitty job! 1249 01:16:36,221 --> 01:16:37,639 What the fuck? 1250 01:16:38,390 --> 01:16:40,933 - Doug! Watch out! Run! - Doug! Run! 1251 01:16:40,934 --> 01:16:42,727 Come on, Doug, run! 1252 01:16:42,728 --> 01:16:45,396 - Hey! - Run! Faster! 1253 01:16:45,397 --> 01:16:46,564 Hey. 1254 01:16:46,565 --> 01:16:48,566 - Doug, run! - Doug! 1255 01:16:48,567 --> 01:16:49,442 What? 1256 01:16:49,443 --> 01:16:51,485 - He's right behind you! - What? 1257 01:16:51,486 --> 01:16:54,323 - Run, Doug! - Doug! 1258 01:16:55,115 --> 01:16:56,324 Oh, shit! 1259 01:16:56,325 --> 01:16:57,743 Shit, shit. 1260 01:16:58,368 --> 01:17:00,913 Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Shit. 1261 01:17:01,705 --> 01:17:02,955 Oh, shit. 1262 01:17:02,956 --> 01:17:04,040 - Run! - Run! 1263 01:17:04,041 --> 01:17:06,042 - Run, Doug! Run! - Run! 1264 01:17:06,043 --> 01:17:07,460 What the hell is on my back? 1265 01:17:07,461 --> 01:17:09,421 It's a long story! Just run! 1266 01:17:16,929 --> 01:17:18,096 Shit! 1267 01:17:22,976 --> 01:17:25,187 God, help me! Jesus! 1268 01:17:27,731 --> 01:17:29,857 Damn it. This thing's alive! 1269 01:17:29,858 --> 01:17:31,360 This thing's alive! 1270 01:17:32,194 --> 01:17:35,029 It's trying to bite me! 1271 01:17:35,030 --> 01:17:36,698 Doug! Run! 1272 01:17:43,372 --> 01:17:45,706 Holy shit! Get back to the boat! 1273 01:17:45,707 --> 01:17:48,501 Get back to the boat! Go! 1274 01:17:48,502 --> 01:17:51,880 - Boat! Go! Go! Go! - It was right behind me! 1275 01:17:56,176 --> 01:17:58,177 - Okay. All right. All right. - Okay. 1276 01:17:58,178 --> 01:17:59,929 I think we're okay. I think we're okay. 1277 01:17:59,930 --> 01:18:01,013 Oh, God. 1278 01:18:01,014 --> 01:18:02,432 All right. All right. We-- 1279 01:18:03,308 --> 01:18:04,976 What the hell! 1280 01:18:04,977 --> 01:18:06,562 I thought I was dead. 1281 01:18:07,896 --> 01:18:09,147 How you doing, Dougie? 1282 01:18:09,982 --> 01:18:11,232 - I'm okay now. - Good. 1283 01:18:11,233 --> 01:18:12,316 I thought we lost you, man. 1284 01:18:12,317 --> 01:18:13,485 Can I say something? 1285 01:18:14,403 --> 01:18:15,779 I'm sorry. 1286 01:18:16,530 --> 01:18:18,990 I think I got so caught up in wanting to play a hero, 1287 01:18:18,991 --> 01:18:22,076 that I lost sight of what it is that's really important to me. 1288 01:18:22,077 --> 01:18:24,413 And that's just making stuff with you guys again. 1289 01:18:25,247 --> 01:18:27,123 Griff, I feel the exact same way. 1290 01:18:27,124 --> 01:18:28,166 I love you guys. 1291 01:18:28,667 --> 01:18:30,085 I just have one question. 1292 01:18:32,546 --> 01:18:35,716 Whose idea was it to put that dead squirrel in my mouth? 1293 01:18:37,426 --> 01:18:39,802 It was like a group decision. It wasn't-- 1294 01:18:39,803 --> 01:18:42,431 - Really? - Yeah, it wasn't like one person. 1295 01:18:43,140 --> 01:18:45,266 Snakes love squirrel meat. 1296 01:18:45,267 --> 01:18:46,726 I knew it was your idea! 1297 01:18:46,727 --> 01:18:48,144 Guys, come on. We gotta keep moving. 1298 01:18:48,145 --> 01:18:50,564 All right, well, I made a choice and I'm sticking with it. 1299 01:19:10,584 --> 01:19:12,377 Holy shit. 1300 01:19:13,629 --> 01:19:15,130 It's the Anaconda set. 1301 01:19:15,714 --> 01:19:18,008 What happened? It's destroyed. 1302 01:19:26,141 --> 01:19:27,142 Hello? 1303 01:19:28,894 --> 01:19:31,063 Is anyone there? Hello? 1304 01:19:33,857 --> 01:19:35,025 Can you help us? 1305 01:19:37,861 --> 01:19:39,655 What? I... 1306 01:19:44,993 --> 01:19:46,703 What? Again, sorry? 1307 01:19:48,789 --> 01:19:50,207 Behind you! 1308 01:20:14,231 --> 01:20:17,149 Holy shit. Ice Cube? 1309 01:20:17,150 --> 01:20:20,571 Who'd you think it was, Jon Voight? Let's go. 1310 01:20:26,910 --> 01:20:28,536 Let's go, let's go, let's go. Now. 1311 01:20:28,537 --> 01:20:30,664 In here. Get in here, tube socks. 1312 01:20:44,511 --> 01:20:45,637 We're good. 1313 01:20:46,346 --> 01:20:48,097 Hey, are you okay? 1314 01:20:48,098 --> 01:20:51,559 Yeah, I'm all right. The snake tore up the set. 1315 01:20:51,560 --> 01:20:54,478 Everybody scattered. Lamp hit me, I'm down. 1316 01:20:54,479 --> 01:20:57,190 I get up, nobody there. 1317 01:20:57,191 --> 01:21:00,234 - What about J.Lo? - Yeah, and Eric Stoltz? 1318 01:21:00,235 --> 01:21:02,195 Jenny from the block, so she gonna be okay, 1319 01:21:02,196 --> 01:21:04,864 but Eric ain't from the block. 1320 01:21:04,865 --> 01:21:06,575 - Jesus. - Damn it. 1321 01:21:07,117 --> 01:21:11,537 I don't know how we're gonna do it, but we have to kill it before it kills us. 1322 01:21:11,538 --> 01:21:13,247 I'm with that, I'm with that. 1323 01:21:13,248 --> 01:21:15,459 Hey, how were they gonna do it in your script? 1324 01:21:16,835 --> 01:21:20,379 I don't know. The writer never finished the third act. 1325 01:21:20,380 --> 01:21:24,008 What? You guys started shooting before you knew the end? 1326 01:21:24,009 --> 01:21:26,427 Welcome to Hollywood, buttercup. 1327 01:21:26,428 --> 01:21:29,722 That's what they do. They just make it up as they go along. 1328 01:21:29,723 --> 01:21:32,850 What was the general gist? Do you have any idea? Was anything-- 1329 01:21:32,851 --> 01:21:36,604 All I know is they were setting up pyrotechnics all through here. 1330 01:21:36,605 --> 01:21:38,022 Is it still up? 1331 01:21:38,023 --> 01:21:40,608 It's hooked up, but I don't know how to work pyro. 1332 01:21:40,609 --> 01:21:44,446 Kenny, you know how to ignite pyro, right? 1333 01:21:44,988 --> 01:21:46,697 - Not a problem, boss. - Hey, hey. 1334 01:21:46,698 --> 01:21:50,201 I don't know what y'all talking about. I gotta go save J.Lo and Stoltz. 1335 01:21:50,202 --> 01:21:51,327 - Okay. - Really? 1336 01:21:51,328 --> 01:21:53,162 - You go. - You're going after them? 1337 01:21:53,163 --> 01:21:56,916 They the homies, okay? I can't leave 'em out here with the ops. 1338 01:21:56,917 --> 01:22:00,379 I got to go and represent. They my castmates. 1339 01:22:00,879 --> 01:22:03,422 Actors code. Respect. 1340 01:22:03,423 --> 01:22:04,424 Yeah, yeah. 1341 01:22:05,551 --> 01:22:07,176 - Can we get a... - Do you mind? 1342 01:22:07,177 --> 01:22:10,013 - We're such fans of everything you do. - Come on, please. 1343 01:22:12,391 --> 01:22:15,560 Man, y'all groupied out. Y'all groupied out. What? Let's go. 1344 01:22:15,561 --> 01:22:18,355 - Yes! - Okay. Everybody get in here. Grin. Okay. 1345 01:22:20,816 --> 01:22:23,317 - Don't post that. - No, no, no. 1346 01:22:23,318 --> 01:22:26,904 Can we get one more for safety? I don't think my face was totally in there. 1347 01:22:26,905 --> 01:22:28,865 - No, it's fine. - It's fine, it's fine. 1348 01:22:28,866 --> 01:22:31,325 - You're gonna need that. - You sure? 1349 01:22:31,326 --> 01:22:32,536 Of course. 1350 01:22:33,078 --> 01:22:34,788 I got another one. 1351 01:22:35,789 --> 01:22:38,417 All right. Keep it gangster. 1352 01:22:44,381 --> 01:22:45,632 Legend. 1353 01:22:46,175 --> 01:22:47,550 You thinking what I'm thinking? 1354 01:22:47,551 --> 01:22:48,552 Oh, yeah. 1355 01:22:50,345 --> 01:22:52,764 - It could work, right? - Hundred per cent. 1356 01:22:54,641 --> 01:22:56,601 What are you thinking? 1357 01:22:56,602 --> 01:22:59,812 Just so I'm... Just to make sure that it's exactly what I'm thinking. 1358 01:22:59,813 --> 01:23:01,189 Which I'm sure it is, totally. I mean... 1359 01:23:01,190 --> 01:23:02,691 I'm super sure. 1360 01:23:03,901 --> 01:23:05,443 I'm thinking about killing that snake. 1361 01:23:05,444 --> 01:23:07,821 Now see, that's it, that's what... I was thinking that too. 1362 01:23:09,865 --> 01:23:11,033 Okay, here's the plan. 1363 01:23:11,950 --> 01:23:13,952 Griff, you get the detonator from Kenny. 1364 01:23:15,120 --> 01:23:17,331 Claire, you fire up the generators. 1365 01:23:19,124 --> 01:23:21,168 Kenny, you set up the cameras. 1366 01:23:24,838 --> 01:23:26,672 I'll get the golf cart. 1367 01:23:26,673 --> 01:23:29,258 We'll lure the snake into the pyro field 1368 01:23:29,259 --> 01:23:31,553 and end this thing once and for all. 1369 01:23:33,514 --> 01:23:35,766 You ready for our big Hollywood ending? 1370 01:23:42,689 --> 01:23:43,856 - You ready? - Yeah. 1371 01:23:43,857 --> 01:23:47,360 Kenny said as soon as we get to the pyro field, we can detonate these one by one. 1372 01:23:47,361 --> 01:23:50,697 - Gonna blow this bitch sky-high. - Sky-freaking-high. 1373 01:23:56,912 --> 01:23:58,455 Come get us, asshole! 1374 01:24:05,295 --> 01:24:06,129 Where is he? 1375 01:24:09,216 --> 01:24:10,843 Oh, shit! 1376 01:24:14,471 --> 01:24:17,432 - Oh, shit. Oh, shit! - Oh, shit! 1377 01:24:18,183 --> 01:24:20,893 - Doesn't this go faster? - Well, take off the governor. 1378 01:24:20,894 --> 01:24:22,979 Underneath there. See if you can rip it off. 1379 01:24:22,980 --> 01:24:25,231 - Governor? - The governor! It slows it down. 1380 01:24:25,232 --> 01:24:28,485 - The hell you talking about, governor? - I'm talking about golf cart technology! 1381 01:24:34,950 --> 01:24:37,076 - Where'd it go? - I don't see it. I don't know where it is. 1382 01:24:37,077 --> 01:24:38,245 Keep your head on a swivel. 1383 01:24:39,162 --> 01:24:40,288 I don't see it anywhere. 1384 01:24:40,289 --> 01:24:42,123 - Whoa! - Whoa! 1385 01:24:42,124 --> 01:24:43,083 Oh, my God! 1386 01:24:45,085 --> 01:24:46,127 Oh, shit. 1387 01:24:46,128 --> 01:24:47,795 We lost the signal. 1388 01:24:47,796 --> 01:24:49,505 If we don't get this thing online in time... 1389 01:24:49,506 --> 01:24:50,715 Then we're all dead. 1390 01:24:50,716 --> 01:24:51,967 - Let's go. - Let's go. 1391 01:24:54,928 --> 01:24:56,345 Dude, you're actually a really good driver. 1392 01:24:56,346 --> 01:24:58,140 Thank you. 1393 01:25:00,559 --> 01:25:01,810 Oh, my God! 1394 01:25:06,481 --> 01:25:09,066 Why is there no power? Why is there no power? 1395 01:25:09,067 --> 01:25:11,485 Pyro field dead ahead. It's now or never. 1396 01:25:11,486 --> 01:25:12,570 Armed and ready. 1397 01:25:12,571 --> 01:25:14,113 - No! - All right, look. 1398 01:25:14,114 --> 01:25:16,073 - Look for something like this. - Like this, okay. 1399 01:25:16,074 --> 01:25:17,075 Almost there! 1400 01:25:21,205 --> 01:25:23,956 It's getting closer! It's getting closer! Oh, God! 1401 01:25:23,957 --> 01:25:25,000 Go faster! 1402 01:25:27,085 --> 01:25:29,128 Fuck. Found it! 1403 01:25:29,129 --> 01:25:30,839 - Can I hit it now? - Hold. Hold. 1404 01:25:34,760 --> 01:25:36,093 Now! Hit it now! 1405 01:25:36,094 --> 01:25:38,722 Die, you giant snake bitch! 1406 01:25:41,517 --> 01:25:42,683 - What the-- - What? 1407 01:25:42,684 --> 01:25:45,102 It's not working! It's not working! 1408 01:25:45,103 --> 01:25:47,480 - Hit all of them. - I am! I'm hitting every one of 'em! 1409 01:25:47,481 --> 01:25:49,607 And now we die! Now we die! 1410 01:25:49,608 --> 01:25:50,775 Why didn't it happen? 1411 01:25:50,776 --> 01:25:51,943 - Why isn't it... - I don't know. 1412 01:25:51,944 --> 01:25:52,986 Oh, wait. 1413 01:25:54,655 --> 01:25:55,989 I forgot to turn it on. 1414 01:25:59,535 --> 01:26:01,995 Yes! 1415 01:26:03,705 --> 01:26:06,165 - Yes! Yes. Yes. - Yes! Yes! 1416 01:26:06,166 --> 01:26:07,584 Yeah! 1417 01:26:22,349 --> 01:26:23,267 Yeah! 1418 01:26:24,560 --> 01:26:25,936 Did we kill it? 1419 01:26:27,354 --> 01:26:29,690 - No! - Why? 1420 01:26:31,650 --> 01:26:32,984 Come on. The cart's stuck. 1421 01:26:32,985 --> 01:26:34,402 Oh, shit. 1422 01:26:34,403 --> 01:26:35,988 - Go! - Go, go, go. 1423 01:26:40,576 --> 01:26:42,536 - It's a dead end. - Oh, my God. 1424 01:26:47,666 --> 01:26:48,667 Shit. 1425 01:26:56,466 --> 01:26:57,843 We're all gonna die. 1426 01:27:38,967 --> 01:27:40,886 Not on my watch, mister. 1427 01:27:54,525 --> 01:27:56,068 - Oh, man. - Gross. 1428 01:28:06,745 --> 01:28:07,788 Griff, no! 1429 01:28:23,470 --> 01:28:25,430 And that's a wrap on snake. 1430 01:29:15,022 --> 01:29:17,065 - Thank you very much. - Thank you. 1431 01:29:23,363 --> 01:29:26,533 A long time ago, a group of artists had a vision 1432 01:29:27,409 --> 01:29:31,329 to one day live their dream of making a major motion picture. 1433 01:29:31,330 --> 01:29:37,211 And last year, against all odds, I'm proud to say that dream was realised. 1434 01:29:41,340 --> 01:29:43,007 As my friend Kenny likes to say, 1435 01:29:43,008 --> 01:29:47,136 the snake is a metaphor for the monsters that come for all of us 1436 01:29:47,137 --> 01:29:48,930 if our dreams remain unrealised. 1437 01:29:48,931 --> 01:29:52,184 And to be clear, there's also a non-metaphor snake. 1438 01:29:53,602 --> 01:29:54,727 Oh, my God! 1439 01:29:54,728 --> 01:29:59,399 Quick shout-out to Claire Simons and Kenny Trent! 1440 01:30:00,400 --> 01:30:02,569 Better luck next time! 1441 01:30:06,031 --> 01:30:07,990 While we may not have the rights... 1442 01:30:07,991 --> 01:30:09,659 We don't have... We definitely don't have the rights. 1443 01:30:09,660 --> 01:30:12,412 This is our completely unauthorised, 1444 01:30:13,580 --> 01:30:19,169 possibly illegal reboot of the Sony classic film... 1445 01:30:21,713 --> 01:30:25,551 - Ladies and gentlemen, The Anaconda! - The Anaconda! 1446 01:31:43,545 --> 01:31:45,379 Are you Doug McCallister? 1447 01:31:45,380 --> 01:31:46,381 Uh-huh. 1448 01:31:46,965 --> 01:31:49,592 You directed the unauthorised version of Anaconda 1449 01:31:49,593 --> 01:31:51,178 even though you didn't have the rights? 1450 01:31:52,304 --> 01:31:53,263 Yeah. 1451 01:31:53,764 --> 01:31:55,057 I saw your little movie. 1452 01:31:58,018 --> 01:32:00,437 And I loved it. I loved it. 1453 01:32:00,938 --> 01:32:05,025 That's why I'm here. I'm here because we're doing another Anaconda, 1454 01:32:05,526 --> 01:32:07,402 and I want you to direct it. 1455 01:32:08,654 --> 01:32:09,821 Are you in? 1456 01:33:55,802 --> 01:33:56,887 Guys? 1457 01:34:01,058 --> 01:34:02,226 Griff? 1458 01:34:11,193 --> 01:34:13,403 I'm alive!