[Indistinct chatter]
[Atmospheric music]
[Chatter continues]
[Train clacks in distance]
[Gentle whimsical music]
[Microwave beeps and hums]
[Microwave door opens]
[Music fades]
You feelin' steady?
Oh, yeah, I'm all right.
I'm not so stiff.
- Wanna use your frame? - [Struggling] No.
Well, why don't you try on your own. I'm here in case.
That's it.
- Do you need the toilet? - No, I'm all right for a minute.
I've already got some water.
[She grunts]
- That's it. - Okay, I'll be out here.
Thank you.
[Floorboards creak outside room]
[Objects clatter outside room]
WOMAN: Saber?
What are you doing?
[Indistinct conversation outside]
[Dog barks outside]
[Dog yelps playfully]
WOMAN: Hey. Oh!
[Water running]
- CARER: Not too hot? - PATIENT: No, it's good.
- It's gone cold. - Oh, sorry. Hang on.
- [TV noises] - Want anything before I go?
No, I'm all right.
I've put some soup for you in the fridge.
Thank you.
- I'm finishin' now, just leavin'. - [Quiz game on TV]
I'm not sure. About 25?
- I'm off, Elsie. Look after yourself. - Oh, thanks for comin'.
[Door opens and shuts]
[Train clacks nearby, keys jingle]
She all right?
Yeah, I've just seen to her.
[Birds chirp]
- Straight off to another one? - Six today.
Half hour drive now.
That's tough. Got to be happy every time you see a new one, haven't you?
[Carer chuckles]
- [Door slams] - Take care.
[Engine starts, siren wails in distance]
Just chew on that thing until your teeth come out, eh?
[Wind blows]
[Atmospheric music; plastic piercing]
[Clicks]
[Microwave hums]
[Music ends]
[Dog whines excited]
Stop it.
You're makin' it harder, I can't get it in there.
[Dog chomps]
[Microwave beeps, button clicks repeatedly]
- WOMAN [on TV]: ...He did do this-- - [Atmospheric music]
Oh, the nice bathroom, Lily!
- Yes, I'm delighted. - Underfloor heating?
- It is, yes. - Cosy, cosy.
And what people want. Nice shower.
Excellent.
[Water runs]
[Music turns gentle]
[Alarm beeps gently inside]
[Blows a kiss, clock ticks loudly]
[Elsie exhales]
[Dog collar jingles gently]
[Dog pants]
[Birds chirp]
[Music fades]
MAN [On TV]: This rise in the popularity of the sport
across the world, especially as a fundraising society,
that led the organisation
to investigate its benefits.
They concluded that the combination of teamwork,
fundraising, and sheer hard work
produced a much needed sense of well-being in the team.
Now to our next story...
[Spoon clacks, clock ticks loudly]
- [Dog wheezes excitedly] - All right.
I'll take you out later. Hey, move out the way.
- Not now. Wait. Wait! - [Dog yelps]
[Dog barks]
[Train clacks loudly nearby]
[Distant traffic hum]
[Siren wails in distance]
- ELSIE: Who is it? - It's Colleen from next door.
- You all right? - [Elsie grunts inside]
ELSIE: I'm coming.
- Hello, are you okay? - Going to the shop, if you want anything?
- Ah no, I'm okay, love. Thank you. - No milk or bread or nothing?
- Well, I could do with some milk. Erm... - Yeah?
Would you get me a couple of slices of ham?
- Of course, yeah. - I'll get you some money.
- I'll get it when I get back. - Okay.
[Atmospheric music]
[Scanner beeps, bag rustles]
- And how many apples is that? - One, two, three, four, five.
[Music fades]
- Oh, thank you, Colleen. - Yeah.
Godsend.
Thirty slices?
[Chuckles] I'll never get through that lot.
- I know. - [Objects clatter in kitchen]
Never mind.
Now then.
- What do I owe you? - Oh, it's just a couple of pounds.
Doesn't have to be exact.
- Oh, you sure? - Yeah.
Right.
[Change jingles]
And I'll let you know when I'm goin' to the shop.
Oh, thank you.
- I can't get there meself now. - Of course, yeah.
Bye.
Thank you.
[Dog yelps]
[Colleen gasps]
[Munches loudly]
[Dog pants happily]
- [Clock ticks loudly] - MAN [On TV]: I'm laughing.
The memories that you're-- The memories of my mother who...
[Phone rings]
MAN [On TV]: She was very a funny lady. She had an innate funny bone in her.
- She made a house full of laughter... - [Dog barks outside]
- Hello? - MAN: Mum, you okay?
- Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. - What were you up to?
I was just warmin' up a drop of soup.
- I bet you like the soup, eh? - Oh.
- Mum? - Oh!
- Would you look at that? - What's happening?
Next door's dog's at me plants.
- [Dog chomps] - COLLEEN: Saber!
What the fuck are you doing?
- COLLEEN: Fuckin' hell! - Can you hear that?
What the fuckin' hell is wrong with you?
- [Dog yelps] - Saber, you fucking idiot!
- ELSIE: It's her swearin'. Potty mouth. - COLLEEN: What's wrong with you?
ELSIE: Oh, she's got hold of the dog. She's pullin' him away now.
- COLLEEN: Get over here. - [Dog grunts]
She can see me lookin'.
What's wrong with you?
- SON: You'll have to go round. - No, I'm not going to mention it.
- COLLEEN: Saber! - Of course I'm not.
- She's not out of control, eh? - It was the dog, not her.
[Buzzer sounds]
[Dog barks]
Mrs Richards, Saber chewed up a load of your plants.
And we're sorry and we got you some new plants.
Oh, well, I don't expect she meant it.
I got some plants.
But you gotta tell me if you want different ones
'cause I don't know what ones...
Oh, you shouldn't have gone to all that expense, Colleen.
I'm gonna put 'em in. A dog can't do it, obviously.
Look, my son deals with all of that.
I should do it.
Oh, well, if you're sure.
Absolutely, Mrs Richards.
Call me Elsie.
Erm...
I'll put the kettle on then, shall I?
All right.
[Traffic hums in distance]
[Colleen hums a tune, train hums at speed in distance]
[Dog barks in distance, siren wails in distance]
[Teapot clanks]
[Birds chirp, Colleen hums a tune outside]
[Uneasy music]
COLLEEN: Saber?
Saber?
You didn't invite her in, did you?
- No. - Ah, sorry.
- No, she's... - Come here.
No don't... She's all right, is she, she doesn't bite?
Oh, yeah. She's soft. She's so soft, like blancmange.
[Gentle music]
You're all right.
- Saber? - Is she gonna let me pass?
Yeah. Of course, she is.
- You're all right. Come here. - [Dog yelps]
Do you wanna have, uh, the tea inside or outside or--
- Oh, no, let's sit in the front room. - Great.
- Can you fetch that tray through? - Yeah.
I can manage a cup, but not-- not the tray.
- [Dog wheezes] - COLLEEN: Just give my hands a wash.
[Music fades; water runs]
- You've earned that. [Chuckles] - Mm-hmm.
[Distant traffic hum]
It's so weird. It's just exactly like mine, but the other way around.
Yeah, well, I think they're all the same, give or take.
- They were built like that, weren't they? - Yeah.
Yeah.
- It's nice. The tea's nice. - Oh, that's good.
You get all sorts of flavours if you get the loose tea.
Hmm.
You probably can with the bags, but I know you can with the loose.
- My husband liked oolong. - Hmm.
- Yeah, it tasted like bacon. - Hmm.
[Chuckles, slurps]
How long have you lived here?
I've been here since they were built. Fifty years. Yeah.
COLLEEN: And was they all here-- like, all of these were here then?
ELSIE: No. These ones were built first. Mine and yours were then attached.
[Atmospheric music continues; dog pants happily]
[Train rattles nearby, siren wails in distance]
[Clock ticks loudly]
[Music continues]
[Buzzer sounds]
[She clears throat]
Hi, Mrs Richards, it's Mary, from the agency.
I've come to dust you down. All right?
- ELSIE: That's too hard. - Sorry. I'm just tryin' to untangle it.
Don't know what you've been doing to make it so knotty?
- [Music ends] - I've put it on.
It takes 25 minutes.
- You'll be all right to get it out? - Yes. I'll watch the clock.
MARY: I've done the washing. It just needs takin' out and hanging.
Thank you.
Bye, Mrs Richards.
- That weren't an hour. - Excuse me?
You're supposed to be in there an hour, and that were like 40 minutes.
No, I've been in an hour.
Not by my watch, you haven't.
Do you think that's what Elsie deserves, eh?
Just three quarters of her allotted time?
[Tense music]
Now look here, Miss Neighbour, you have no idea what my job entails.
I wouldn't step on my grass issuin' threats, Mrs Woman,
'cause she's gonna bite your cheeks off.
[Sabre barks and growls menacingly]
I was not issuing threats to anyone.
It sounded like one to me. Get off my grass. Get off of my grass.
Right...
Tell your colleagues not to short-change Mrs Richards again, all right?
- MARY: Fucking nuts. - [Door slams]
[Engine starts, dog pants]
[Dog barks happily]
Someone's gotta protect her, haven't they.
Are you Elsie's protector? Shall we see if she's all right?
[Music intensifies]
COLLEEN: Hmm.
Mm-hmm.
What are you doing? Mentalist.
This way, this way.
[Music ends, dog whines]
What is it? Is it, like, cottage pie?
I don't know. The lady just puts it in the oven.
She hasn't put any vegetables for you
[To herself]: so that's not very good for your five a day, is it?
No. Stay!
[TV noises]
COLLEEN: Do they normally expect you just to get it yourself?
Oh, well, it depends who it is comes.
- Right. - I can do it meself.
Of course you can. Yeah.
I'll just, uh, turn this around, so...
you can watch your program.
- There's not one of your five a day. - There's potatoes.
They're not one of your five a day. I thought they were, but they're not.
There's a bit of carrot.
I'll clean the kitchen up. This care worker ain't done nothin'.
WOMAN [On TV]: ...an original toilet, original packaging, and you can...
Thanks, Colleen.
COLLEEN: Oh, yeah, my pleasure, indeed.
- I ain't doin' nothin' else, am I? - [Elsie chuckles]
[Atmospheric music]
COLLEEN: Saber!
[Dog sniffs]
[Gentle breeze, birds chirp]
COLLEEN: Mmm.
It's much better than a towel rack.
[Music fades]
- COLLEEN: How old was he? - ELSIE: Oh, he was only 73.
So you've been on your own, like...
Thirteen years? That's a long time.
Yeah, it is a long time.
Yeah, I never met him 'cause I moved in
after he died, so...
- Did you like livin' here together? - Oh, yeah, yeah. [Chuckles]
But then I'd have been happy livin' anywhere with him.
Well, it's-- it's not the place, is it? It's the people.
Yeah, I never lived with anyone.
[Chuckles]
He'd be lookin' after you, though, wouldn't he, now?
We'd be takin care of each other. That's what you do, isn't it?
[Smacks lips] How old are you, Colleen?
Go on, you guess.
People normally guess a bit younger than what I am.
Oh, uh...
About...
forty?
[Shocked] What?
Forty?
- I'm close, though, ain't I? - No!
Look at my skin. My skin's like a kid's skin.
So, how far out am I?
- Five years. - Oh.
You aged me five years.
[Annoyed] Yeah, I'm 35, obviously.
Not even that. People think I'm, like, 32.
Sorry.
[Both chuckle]
Forty.
WOMAN [On video]: Start with a little.
- [Munching] - You don't want a heavy, cakey finish.
You can always add more foundation if you need to.
Picking that up on the brush, then I'm running that along the jawline,
under the eyes,
dabbing that on the forehead, and the same on the other side.
[Birds chirp]
[Clock ticks loudly]
[Gentle traffic hum in distance]
- [Knocks on window] - Mornin'.
Just bringing this in 'cause it looks like it's gonna rain.
I'll bring it inside and I'll bring you a cup of tea.
[Crunches]
I think gettin' up early in the morning, you get more of the day.
[Both munching]
Mm. Where's Saber?
She's asleep.
Hard life.
Where are your family?
Well, it's just my son.
He lives up north.
You don't see him much, then?
Well, he's got family up there, so he can't come very often.
He phones.
I'm-- I'm all right.
Yeah. Of course you are.
Right, I'm gonna get everything you got on this list.
And I also got a surprise.
- Something you might like. - Oh! Can't say.
I wonder what that could be.
Don't you go spending any money on me.
I haven't got any money, Elsie.
Neighbours, neighbours. All right.
- Thank you. - See you when I get back.
[Door closes, Elsie chuckles]
[Phone rings]
ELSIE: No. They don't come today, do they?
Just Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
- How's Debbie? Hmm? - SON: All right, just busy with work.
- Oh, that's good. Yeah. - Probably we'll just come down--
I'm not asking you to come and visit, John.
- If you want us to take time off-- - That's not what I'm sayin'.
- You do wanna see us, don't you? - Of course I'd like to see you.
- All of you. But-- - The kids, you know...
- [Knock on window] - Oh, hold on.
ELSIE: I just made a pot of tea, some cake.
I'm still coming, just gotta do something. You'll like it.
- I know you're on the phone. - [Chuckles]
- Who's this, Mum? - Just Colleen with me shoppin'.
- What? - The neighbour.
What's she doing? I haven't even met her.
Well, I can't help it if you haven't met her, John.
- [Keys jingle, dog yelps excitedly] - Come on.
Who's a good girl?
You've been protecting the house.
[Dog pants]
[Objects clatter]
[Dog yelps]
WOMAN [On video]: Today, we'll knock years off that tired face
and revitalise you, making you look and feel like the younger you.
I'm taking a really gorgeous peachy tone
and I'm applying that just slightly off the apples of the cheeks.
- [Gentle music] - Circular motion, blending that in.
Taking it outwards, making you look lovely and fresh.
I've added some mascara to this eye already,
on my upper and my lower lash.
- I'm gonna do the same-- - [Dog growls]
COLLEEN: What?
...use the very tip to separate out each lash.
[Whispers] Fuck it.
That's what I'm doing now on the lower lash.
So, that's mascara done.
- [Dog whines] - Start by outlining your lips.
Make sure you smile so your application is nice and even.
[Dog growls]
Make sure you smile so your application is nice and even.
Now that you've finished, you should be feeling youthful, energetic,
looking younger, fresher, and more confident,
ready to take on the day.
[Pensive music, dog continues to bark]
[Barking and growling continues]
[Music turns uneasy]
[Objects clatter in room, dog barks]
[Uneasy music continues]
[Buzzer sounds]
[Music fades]
[Birds chirp outside]
[Gentle traffic hum nearby]
[Inquisitive music]
[Bags rustle in the wind, train rumbles in distance]
[Dog barks inside]
COLLEEN: Shut the fuck up!
[Music ends abruptly]
[Clock ticks loudly, train rumbles in distance]
[Gentle uneasy music appears momentarily and fades]
[Engine hums]
[Mechanical whizzing]
[Thumping and squeaking]
Yeah, that's fine. I said I wanted to go anyway.
Okay, I've got to go. I'm at work. Bye.
[Water runs inside]
What's my name?
What?
ELSIE: You don't know, do you?
Do you know how many people I have to see, love?
Get out.
- Get out! - You need to calm down.
- Get out! Get out! - Okay! Fine, I'm out of it.
[Water continues to run, door opens and shuts]
CARER [On phone]: I've already called my supervisor.
There isn't anybody available to come out right now.
No, I'm not going back in. She keeps screaming.
No, r-- not right now.
Okay, wait.
[Knocks on door]
Elsie.
- Will you speak to your son, please? - JOHN: Mum?
- Will you speak to John? - Mum! Is she there?
- See? She won't even answer to you. - Try her neighbour, next door.
- Okay. - Erm, Colleen.
Next door? All right, mate.
I am 20 minutes over, though, already. Just so you know.
[Hurried knocking and buzzing]
- [Dog barks inside] - COLLEEN: Who is it?
- Are you Colleen? - Who are you?
- Mrs Richards' not well. Come round. - What's happened? Is she all right?
- She's been difficult, actually. - I know Elsie.
- I spoke to her son-- - I know Elsie, she's never difficult.
- What have you done to her? - Excuse me?
Stupid fucking bitch.
I have done absolutely nothing wrong to her at all.
How could you say that?
If you just take care of her, then she'd be fine,
she wouldn't be difficult.
CARER: I am taking care of her, that's the whole point.
Elsie!
- She's in the bathroom. - I didn't ask you.
- You all right? - ELSIE: I don't want that woman.
- She's not gonna come in. Can I come in? - ELSIE: Uh, uh, what? I'm naked!
Of course you're naked. You're in the shower. Can I come in?
- ELSIE: Yeah. - You better fuck off.
ELSIE: Just turn it over. I'm becoming cold.
- Thank you. - Get you warm.
I'm sorry, Colleen.
You've not got to apologise for anythin'.
- Are you clean enough? - I was clean before I got in.
- What's the point of that? - They make you have a shower.
So they can mark it down. Can you hand me my stick, love?
- Yeah. Of course I can. - Thank you.
COLLEEN: Letting you go first.
ELSIE: Ta.
Must be freezing. Are you all right?
- Could you get my slippers, Colleen? - Yeah.
- Yeah, I got them. - Oh, my wrist is killing me.
COLLEEN: Shall I take it?
- Let me have that. - This left one.
That'll warm you up.
- Thank you. - Yeah.
And...
- Where am I gonna plug this in? - There's an extension down the side.
All right.
- Okay. - [Hair dryer hums]
[Atmospheric music]
[Music ends]
- COLLEEN: Why do you even need 'em? - [Dog pants]
ELSIE: Because I'm on my own.
My son worries.
Can you not get the shower on your own?
Well, yeah. But I did have a fall. Hurt meself.
So, I expect it's for the best.
Don't you get embarrassed,
being naked in front of people?
No!
They've seen hundreds of people naked. What would make me anything special?
[Munching]
Everyone's special.
[Elsie chuckles]
I think you're really brave.
I couldn't get naked in front of anyone ever again.
Disgusting.
You don't need 'em, Elsie. Not with me next door.
'Cause I can take care of you.
- Well, you'd be a sight better than her. - Yeah.
I wouldn't need any money or nothin'. Just some-- It's cleanin' and cookin'.
- Shoppin'. - Ah, it's a lot of hard work, Colleen.
We're neighbours.
That's what we're supposed to do is help each other.
- Be neighbourly. - Hmm.
And you can do most things.
Well, if you're sure...
Yeah.
It'd be my ticket to heaven.
[Chuckles]
But I'm not wiping your butt.
Hard line.
Don't do shit.
Except Saber's.
[Chuckles]
[Gentle music]
[Elsie chuckles]
[Dog growls gently]
JOHN [On phone]: Yeah, but has she got any proper training?
ELSIE: Well, no, she hasn't. But she's very good.
I just think you could do with someone who has experience.
Why? I'm not an invalid.
I'm not saying you are, but if you need first aid--
[Sighs] I'll call an ambulance.
- She's quite capable of dialin' 999. - Also, why is she doin' it?
I just wonder... Hang on, you're not payin' her, are you?
No!
- I suspect she's lonely. - That's not--
As am I.
Sorry, Mum, I-- I told you to come and live here.
I don't wanna come and live up there.
I can still do things, take care of meself.
- You got the carers, not me. - Because you're fallin' over, Mum.
I don't want strangers in the house!
The girl next door's nice.
And she's perfectly capable of taking care of me.
- You don't even know her name. - Her name's Colleen.
And now I'm goin' because I've had enough.
[Phone beeps]
[Sighs]
[Gentle traffic hum in distance, dog barks in distance]
POSTIE: Good day?
[Letter plate clacks]
See, this is good because then, when I go to the shop,
I can just pick up things without even askin' you.
- Erm... - Anythin' else?
- Gin. - What?
Gin. Go on, put it down.
[Elsie chuckles]
[Dog whimpers]
Right.
I don't wanna talk about money or nothin', but...
What should I do? Should I pay, and then you pay me back?
Or should I take your card?
Uh, well, erm, what's easiest?
Anything's fine with me.
If you trust me, card is easier. Then we don't need to go back and forth.
Of course I trust you.
Yeah. Well, if you trust me, I'll not abuse that trust.
Erm, can I have your pin, though?
You won't need the pin, will you, if it's tap?
Yeah, but sometimes they ask you.
- When it doesn't go through. - Right.
- Let me get it and write it down for you. - All right.
I-- Where is it?' I'll get it.
It's in my bedroom. Top drawer under the mirror.
[Clock ticks loudly]
ELSIE: Can you find it?
Yeah.
Comin'.
[Scanner beeps]
Can I also have some gin?
Which one?
How much is that blue one?
[Scanner beeps]
£19.99.
[Blows raspberry]
All right, yeah.
[Scanner beeps]
£33.68.
I lose this, I'm fucked.
- [Sighs] - [Machine buzzes]
Crowd goes wild. Right.
- COLLEEN: I'm back! - ELSIE: All right.
- All right. Oh. - Are you busy?
What?
- Are you busy? - No.
Oh, well, fine.
Did you get everything?
Yeah, uh, yeah. Uh, I got everythin'.
And I got you that.
That's it.
Hmm.
COLLEEN [To herself]: We put that in there.
Are you all right with the sausages for dinner?
And some veg?
All right, I tell you what.
What I'd like most of all...
COLLEEN: Yeah?
Is to make you dinner.
That's entirely unnecessary, Elsie.
No, just about whatever thank you.
- Oh! Fairy liquid. I'll be through there. - [Chuckles]
- Go and sit yourself down. Go on. - All right.
Go sit.
I can do with a wash.
NARRATOR [On TV]: Gulls are a fixture of the British coast.
Most gulls are ground-nesting carnivores. They'll take live food,
or, as unwary seaside day-trippers may find to their cost,
- [Elsie preps food] - scavenge aggressively.
Low tide means
the birds can now explore the food in the shallow waters--
[Crowd cheering on TV]
[Peeler clatters]
[Sizzling]
Yeah, you know, some people have, like, a big meal during the day
and then something light in the evening, like you.
And some people just something little during the day
and something big in the evening, I never know which one's best.
Yeah, well, I've never known anything different, really.
I suppose back in the day, when you had a lot of manual workers,
they had to stoke up at dinner time
to get through the rest of the day.
Yeah, that's a good point. That's a good theory.
Oh!
- What's wrong? - It's all right. Just got...
[Sneezes]
- Bless you. - Sorry. That was too much mustard.
- Oh. You all right? - No, it's just...
It's arthritis in this wrist. I think I've overdone it.
What can we do?
I'll just give it a rub later on. It'll be all right.
No! I'll just cut up your sausage.
- Move away, Sneezy Magee. - [Chuckles]
COLLEEN: There you go.
- No knife... - Oh, like a baby.
- Yeah. - [Elsie chuckles]
My little baby.
You can just use your fork with the other hand.
[Chuckles]
- And I'll give your hand a rub later. - Thank you.
[Colleen sighs]
Afterwards. That's all part of the five-star service.
[Elsie chuckles]
These are nice sausages.
Yeah, it looks great. I'll have more ketchup.
- Bang it on the bottom. - Yeah.
- Should have put that on the list. - Yeah, I know.
[Emotional music]
[Door clicks shut, birds chirp]
[Music ends]
[Train rattles nearby]
[Rain patters heavily]
[Vacuum cleaner hums loudly]
ELSIE [In bathroom]: ♪ If I could spend all my days
- [Humming stops, water sloshes] - ♪ Near you
♪ I'd be more than content
♪ Near you
♪ Make my wish come true
♪ By telling me that you
♪ Want to spend all your days
♪ Near me
♪ Times when we're apart ♪
[Humming]
[Water in the bathroom continues to run]
No way to behave in the cave.
[Tense music]
Be a rat with all the rats Or be the cat that eats all rats.
Until the cat's all alone, suckin' on bones.
[Music turns emotional]
ELSIE:Colleen!
[Music ends]
[Sing-song]:Colleen!
- You all right, Elsie? - I need a hand getting out.
That's what I'm here for.
- [Iron hisses gently] - [Colleen exhales]
Sounds daft, doesn't it--
You're gonna get into bed and crease 'em.
They don't normally trouble with 'em. So, that's nice, thank you. [Chuckles]
No problem. I can't have you...
burning yourself. This thing's lethal.
Where's your family, Colleen?
Tell you the truth, Elsie,
I don't fuckin' know and don't fuckin' care. Pardon my French.
Sorry, I didn't mean to pry--
No, it's no secret, it's just...
Erm, my dad left when I was too young. I can't remember.
And then my mum couldn't cope with my brother and me, so...
She chose my brother and they left when I was eight.
So, who took care of you?
Government. Still do.
It's like, they're the reason I got that nice house next door.
It's got a leak here.
[Sighs]
My mum never had a house, so... doing better than her.
Aren't I?
It's nice, me and Saber.
Well, you ever need anythin', you know where to come, don't you?
Yeah. Thanks, partner.
I'll scratch your back and you scratch mine. All the way.
[Inquisitive music]
[Music ends; birds chirp gently]
- [Dog barks in distance] - Saber!
We'll never get there at this rate.
[Indistinct chatter]
All right.
[Error message beeps]
What the fuck?
Putting the right thing in-- this bank's so crap.
[She taps numbers]
[Error message beeps]
You're sayin' it's un-- unauthorised, but, erm, you let it go through?
- So, if you let it go through... - [Dog barks]
then you're authorising it, aren't you?
Sorry, the funds are taken
by the bank as part of the charge.
- Depending on your agreement-- - Right, so, you're charging me...
[Dog barks intensely]
for an unauthorised overdraft,
but the charge is making me overdrawn. You gonna charge me on that, too?
Unless you can clear your debt and get yourself back in credit--
Shut the fuck up!
[Barking continues]
This is why people get in a cycle because--
It's just, you get so frustrated, you get in a circle.
Can't get out of it. People kill themselves for this.
You don't give a fucking shit.
- What are you lookin' at? - [Dog whimpers]
[Shouts] I cannot think when you're barking like that!
[Indistinct chatter]
Stay, right?
[Blows a raspberry]
I don't even wanna sell this, but I'm just trying get something for someone.
It's never not been on time.
Since the first day I got it. I set it then.
It's been on time since then. That's how accurate it is.
That's a classic. These are probably all fakes.
[Sighs] All right, what do you want for it?
- 200? - Okay, you're never gonna get that.
- I'll give you 40 quid for it. - Forty?
Are you fucking kidding me? Forty?
The strap's worth 40.
Some links off the strap are worth 40.
If I'm gonna sell this, max I'll get for it is 100.
So...
[Sighs] I'll go 50 quid and that's it.
[Sighs]
It's up to you if you don't want to do it, but it's £50.
Yeah, all right.
- All right. You got ID on you? - Yeah.
[Paper rustles]
All right, fill that.
[Indistinct chatter]
[Dog barks]
[Dog pants excitedly]
- [Chuckles] Hi. - [She sighs]
- You must be Colleen. - Who are you?
I'm John. I'm Elsie's son. It's nice to finally meet you.
I've heard so much.
I've already met Saber.
Yeah. [Chuckles] I didn't know you were comin'.
Mum's made some tea.
Oh.
- Probably best to leave the dog here. - Oh, Elsie loves Saber.
Mu-- [Sighs]
Mum's never had a dog before and I just got the impression
that she'd prefer if the dog stayed out here.
Oh.
- Yeah, I'll take her next door. - Come back for tea, though.
[Dog pants happily]
[Whispers] Psst, psst, psst. Hey!
- [Growls sadly] - I'll give you sausages when I get back.
'Cause you're not invited.
No one likes a Debbie Downer, do they? Especially not John.
Hey, you can't come.
- I'm sorry, you can't come. - [Dog whines]
[Dog whimpers]
[Dog pants]
It-- it's not an option for me, Mum. If I--
If I take it then I'll get less pension.
Oh. Did they offer you a lot?
No, not what I'm worth.
- [Door opens] - COLLEEN: Don't worry, there's no dog.
Well, you wasn't expecting this, was you?
- It's nice. - No!
Oh, well, I had a day off, and, erm,
a few spare bedding plants in the greenhouse.
- Yeah, aren't they lovely? - Yeah.
- You beat me to it, didn't you. - [Elsie chuckles]
- You should see his garden at home. - I bet. I've seen them.
- [John chuckles] - COLLEEN: Right.
- There's tea in the pot. - Thank you.
- COLLEEN: Have you got yours? - Oh, yeah.
[Tea pours, crockery clanks]
COLLEEN: All right.
Oh. Right. [Sighs] Not for me, Elsie.
I'm trying to stop eating sugar.
- Slim down. - Oh, there's nothing of you. [Chuckles]
Is that your car? Silver car?
Oh, yes, that's a-- it's a work car.
It's a nice car. I've seen 'em advertised.
- Hmm. [Chuckles] - You must have a good job.
- They're tryin' to make him redundant. - [Nervous chuckle] All right, Mum.
- Nothing to be ashamed about. - I'm not.
[Whispers] Just a private matter.
- She won't tell anyone-- - [Huffs] Nevertheless.
[Slurps]
I'm not gonna tell anyone, John. It's all right.
[Elsie chuckles and sighs]
It's a nice car, yeah.
Yeah, maybe. It's good.
[Dog whines]
[Birds chirp, train hums in distance]
- [Packaging rustles] - Yeah, I ate all of them.
It's just custard creams, isn't it? Just can't get enough.
Won't fit into my trousers now.
[Elsie struggles]
ELSIE: I'm just gonna nip in here.
- Do you want a hand? - No, I'm all right.
I'm very grateful for you bein' here for my mother.
Well...
you know, in all honesty, John, she's really been there for me.
I know, but, erm, you're not being paid, and I know that that is a big commitment.
Money isn't everythin', is it? It's like your lovely car.
Still gets you from A to B, just like a cheap one would.
And...
I'm happy I got a friend.
And, uh...
I'm able to take care of her.
What is it that you do, uh, live on, for money?
I get benefit.
But I got all the money I need.
Not that it's any business of yours.
Well, I-- I just wanted to make sure that you were okay to be spending
a lot of time with my mother.
Well, that's my choice, isn't it?
And Elsie's.
ELSIE: Colleen!
Can you come?
Unless you want to go.
- COLLEEN [Knocks on door]: Can I come in? - Yeah.
COLLEEN: You all right? What's happened? Oh.
- Oh! - I'm sorry.
[Dog chomps happily]
ELSIE: Make sure you do.
- And thanks for comin' to visit. - Well, it's not--
it's not like you live in a stately home. Point taken-- Anyway, look, this--
- It seems like Colleen is a real help. - Yeah.
[Train hums in distance]
- [Chuckles] Uh... - COLLEEN: It's all right.
She's not gonna bite you.
Who are you, then? Huh? [Chuckles]
- What breed is she? - Cross.
God knows what.
Keep an eye on my Mum.
You know, I, uh, I really appreciate it.
- [Atmospheric music] - What's that about?
- Now you drive careful. - I always will.
[Engine starts]
ELSIE: You coming in, Colleen?
It's like anything you're grippin', even just the slightest thing,
makes it cramp up?
[Music ends]
Well, it-- it sort of comes and goes.
- Them pills make me feel sick. - It's awful, that.
If I weren't here, you wouldn't have been even able to clean up the sick.
- [Whimpers] - 'Cause your hand's so bad.
It's like you can have sore hands and no sickness,
or sickness and no pain.
Mhm.
- Is that better? - Yeah, thank you.
Well, I've got something for you. I've been waiting to give you all day,
which might be the coolest present in the whole world.
What?
What is it?
[Bag rustles]
Lupulella?
Two-way radios-- Well, I've got a radio.
Well, it's walkie-talkies, isn't it? So, now we've got our own mobile network.
- [Walkie-talkie beeps] - Testing, one, two, three.
Elsie, can you hear me?
- What? - Over.
Are you pressin' your button, Elsie? When you speak you gotta press it.
- Which button? - It's the side button, over.
Do you mean on the side-side, or on the side at the front?
Which side?
There is only one side one, over.
All right, I've got it.
[Over walkie-talkie]: When you wanna speak, press it.
After you've finished speakin', say "over".
Is that before letting go?
That is before letting go, over.
I can hear you better through the door!
Right, I'm gonna do it now.
Right, this is me speakin' and I'm pressin' the button.
And now I'm gonna let it go, over.
- [Walkie-talkie beeps] - [Chuckles]:Brilliant, Elsie. That's it.
- Great, we did it! - [Chuckles]
We did it.
You can come in here now, over.[Chuckles]
I don't like it when I don't hear.
JOHN: I told you I'd call you when I was back.
It was lovely to see you today, and you look very well.
Well, it's always nice to see you. I just... I just wish it was more often.
And thanks for plantin' the flowers.
- I love you, son. - I love you, too.
Bye. [Phone beeps]
[Blows a kiss]
[Walkie-talkie clicks]
COLLEEN: ♪ I'm the itsy bitsy spider
♪ Coming to get the fly
♪ To get its prey ♪
- [Walkie-talkie beeps and turns off] - Els--
- [Walkie-talkie clicks] - Don't want no midnight chats then.
- [Walkie-talkie clicks] - All right, over and out.
[Dog pants]
Turn it back on.
- In case anythin' happens in the night. - [Beeps]
We'll be over there like a flash, won't we?
Be over there like a flash.
[Train rumbles in distance]
Right. I know, erm, we've got to take you out.
Hey, where are you goin'?
[Knock on door]
Come here.
[Indistinct radio chatter]
COLLEEN: Stop. Please stop! Please stop!
- [Dog barks, indistinct yelling] - OFFICER 1: You need to get back!
- OFFICER 1: Stop! Don't touch me! - COLLEEN: Get away!
[Dog whimpers]
- No, no! Stop! Get off of me! - [Indistinct yelling]
[Dog whines and whimpers]
- Calm down, please! - Please, get back!
- Colleen! - Ma'am, just get back!
[Indistinct yelling and dog whining continue]
ELSIE: Colleen!
OFFICER 1: Miss Dove, calm down! Calm down, please!
- [Dog growls, Colleen screams] - OFFICER 1 [Sharply]: Please get back!
- Get back! Do not resist! - OFFICER 2: She's fuckin' bitin' me!
- Taser her! - [Screams]
- Taser, taser! - [Taser discharges, screaming]
[Whimpering]
OFFICER 2: Get your hands behind your back!
[Dog whines desperately]
OFFICER 2: Hands behind your back! Stay still!
OFFICER 1: You're not helping. Go back in the house, please!
- OFFICER 2: Stop resisting! - OFFICER 1: Calm down!
- Hold her still! - I've got her.
- [Handcuffs click] - [Screams]
[Colleen sobbing]
- [Screams] - OFFICER 2: Stop movin'!
- Stop! - OFFICER 1: Don't resist!
[Train rattles]
Colleen?
Colleen.
Colleen, are you all right?
Whatever happened?
- Where's Saber? - [Emotional music]
They killed her.
No!
Look, why don't you come in next door?
[Sighs in distress]
[Clock ticks loudly]
- [Walkie-talkie beeps] - ELSIE:Colleen, are you there?
[Beeps]
Colleen, are you there? It's Elsie.
- Over. - [Clicks]
- [Walkie-talkie beeps] - Colleen, I hope you're okay.
I don't really know what to say.
How could they do that?
Listen, I'm gonna leave this thingy on all night.
- And if you want to talk or anythin'... - [Crackles]
God bless you.
- [Walkie-talkie beeps] - [Music turns overwhelming]
- [Music ends] - [Clock ticks loudly]
[Phone rings]
[Grunts]
- Colleen? - JOHN: Mum, you okay?
Oh, uh... Hold on, John. Let me put the...
Hang on.
- Mum? - [Phone beeps]
- Right, what's the time? I've overslept. - You must be tired.
Oh, God, I'm not surprised at all, John. Yesterday, it was awful!
Poor Colleen.
Honestly, the police were here.
She was absolutely hysterical.
Oh, that doesn't surprise me.
[Sighs] They took her dog away from her. Then they arrested her.
Good. Good, that's what they were supposed to do.
That dog's a banned breed. It's a bad dog, it's dangerous.
Who said it was dangerous?
Everyone.
Those dogs, they kill. And I-- I don't want that animal next door to you.
It wasn't you who called the police, was it?
- Of course I did. - Oh, Jesus!
[Sighs and shouts] You should have told me!
What, for diggin' up a few plants?
You should have spoken to me first!
She's my friend!
No, she isn't. She's been next door to you for over a year.
- You've been talkin' for a few weeks! - I've got no one else to talk to!
That doesn't make her your friend. She's clearly simple.
Someone like that should not keep a danger--
You should have told me first!
- I don't want to hear any more. - Mum, don't--
[Phone beeps]
Oh, Jesus.
Oh.
[Button clicks]
[Tense, overwhelming music]
[Uneasy music; clock ticks loudly]
[Music intensifies]
[Music intensifies further]
[Buzzer sounds]
[Knocks on door] Colleen.
Colleen, please open the door.
ELSIE: Colleen!
Colleen!
[Music fades]
[TV noises]
[Audience chuckles and cheers]
[Signal drops]
[Sighs]
[Spits]
[Walkie-talkie buzzes]
- [Elsie screams] - [Chilling music]
ELSIE [Gasps]: Colleen!
- [Walkie-talkie buzzes] - You can't just come in here.
[Buzzing and tense music continue]
[Walkie-talkie buzz stops]
It was your John
who grassed Saber up to the police, wasn't it?
I didn't know, Colleen. Honestly, I didn't.
And I'm ever so sorry.
Colleen.
Don't worry.
It's not gonna change our friendship, Elsie.
I know it weren't you.
[Door clicks shut; music ends]
This is what happens when you interfere.
JOHN: I-- I'm sorry.
I should have told you, that was a mistake. I was worried.
Well, not worried enough to come visit more often.
I know. I will. I-- I'm gonna try and come down today or tomorrow.
In the meantime, it's really important that you call the police.
Don't be stupid. She's upset!
Mum, she's ruined your garden, sneakin' into your house at night.
She didn't sneak.
She's got a key!
If you don't call the police, then I will.
[Dog barks outside]
[Hum of approaching vehicle]
[Vehicle rolls to a stop]
Excuse me.
- Oh, Mrs Richards? - Yeah.
Someone's made a mess of your garden.
- Do you know when this happened? - It was yesterday.
- She's not there. - Do you know where Miss Dove might be?
No. I don't know where she is.
She's very upset. I mean, you lot killed her dog.
I don't know anything about that.
- Did you actually see her do it? - No, no I didn't.
But my son thinks it may have been Colleen.
And I don't want to press charges anyway.
- I'm worried about her. - I understand.
[Train signal sounds in distance]
MAN [On radio]: You know, it's ridiculous. And finally, and sadly,
because of what happened with-- we're in a position,
where we feel like we're being heard.
But it-- it's such a tragedy...
[Button clicks]
- [Phone rings] - ELSIE: Oh, for--
[Elsie groans]
[She sighs]
- MACHINE: The person you are calling-- - [Elsie sighs]
[Clock ticks loudly]
[Phone rings]
[Toilet flushes]
MACHINE: I'm sorry. The person--
[Dial tone]
Hello?
[Phone beeps, she sighs]
[Tense music]
[Gentle breeze]
[Clock ticks loudly]
[Phone rings]
[Beep]
- Hello? - WOMAN: Elsie, I've been calling.
Oh, was that you, Debbie? Sorry, I was in the toilet.
- Is John with you? - No. No, he's not here.
- He's not picking up. Have you talked? - No.
Well, I did call him earlier, as it happens.
But there was no answer.
He said he was coming to see you.
- Tonight? - Yeah.
- What time did he leave? - About four hours ago.
- He's not answering... - Oh, I wouldn't worry, Debbie.
- I am worried, of course I'm worried. - No.
He should have been there two hours ago.
Well, when he does get here, I'll ask him to ring you.
- Make sure he does. - Yeah, straight away.
- Well, good night. - All right, Debbie. Night-night.
- [Phone beeps] - [Gentle rattling in the house]
Is that you, John?
Debbie's been phonin'.
Worried about you.
- I told her you'd call as soon as you... - I wanted to get you the good ones.
The good-- the cakes you like, the...
[Tense music]
All that was open was the fucking garage,
so it's like those ones, those tarts there,
or nothing.
What... What are you doing, Colleen?
Then I thought, "Well, it's late, isn't it?
Probably not best to have caffeine in that."
Instead of tea, I got hot chocolate.
I thought you was John.
No. [Exhales]
I am not that rat.
[Uneasy music]
Anyway, he wouldn't get you tarts, or cakes, or anything, would he?
I don't think so.
Where have you been?
Has something happened?
Someone hurt you?
[Colleen scoffs]
I've been hurtin' all my life, Elsie, to be honest.
Shall we sit down, have some tea?
Come on.
We're gonna have a treat.
I'm not-- I'm not really that hungry, love.
Yeah, you are. Come.
Is that blood?
Where's that from?
[Music turns more tense]
I think you know.
[Phone rings]
He didn't even-- he didn't wanna apologise.
[Phone beeps]
- Hello? - DEBBIE: Elsie.
The police are here. They're saying they found...
- He did in the end, though. - There's a body in the car.
They won't say it's his but-- it's his car. Who else could it be?
- [Skin cutting] - ELSIE: Debbie, what?
Yes! Yes, they found his car!
What, they found his car?
Yeah. Yeah, his car. And-- and there's a body in the car.
- [Whimpers] - It's him. It's John.
- [Debbie continues] - [Colleen mutters]
[Blood pouring]
- [Debbie speaks indistinctively] - [Tense music continues]
[Tearful] What have you done, Colleen?
[Blood continues to pour]
They just told you.
What have you done?
[Music intensifies]
- [Elsie screams] - [Bone snaps]
ELSIE: Colleen! [Shouts, groans]
[Elsie wails]
[Music fades]
[Birds chirp, gentle breeze]
[Dog barks in distance]
- There you are. - Thank you.
- Right. - [Sighs] Oh, thank you.
Is that okay she's had that biscuit? Someone said she had cake this mornin'.
- She did not? - No. It's fine.
- [Woman chuckles] - Right. There you go.
[Indistinct chatter]
CARER: Was it you that stole my cake?
- WOMAN: Was it me who did what? - It can't have been you.
- Morning. - Good morning.
- Right, I've got a biscuit for you here. - All right. Thank you.
[Tense music]
- Are you havin' anythin'? - No, thanks.
Nothing for you? All right.
- Hey, Poppy, what would you like? - [Indistinct speech]
[Laughs] Yeah. Right, let me give you this.
CARER: Will you have a custard cream? Or another one?
POPPY: I'm not getting those, am I?
CARER: You can't have both. You have to make a decision. Only one.
There you go.
Tea or coffee? What are you having? [Speech turns indistinct]