1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:13,550 [bathroom fan] 2 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 3 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 4 00:00:13,550 --> 00:00:17,130 [blowing lips] 5 00:00:17,130 --> 00:00:31,620 [vocal warm ups] 6 00:00:31,620 --> 00:00:32,640 Okay. 7 00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:36,960 In the romance audiobook production system 8 00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:37,780 there are two separate 9 00:00:37,780 --> 00:00:39,490 yet equally important groups. 10 00:00:39,490 --> 00:00:41,240 The authors who write the books, 11 00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:43,170 and the narrators who read them. 12 00:00:43,170 --> 00:00:44,480 These are their sto-- 13 00:00:44,480 --> 00:00:46,770 [bathroom fan] 14 00:00:46,770 --> 00:00:47,540 [fan switched off] 15 00:00:47,540 --> 00:00:48,460 Ahem! 16 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:50,780 These are their stories. 17 00:00:50,780 --> 00:00:51,320 [door shuts] 18 00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:52,310 Well... 19 00:00:52,310 --> 00:00:54,160 no, this is just her story 20 00:00:54,160 --> 00:00:55,650 The lady in the closet. 21 00:00:55,650 --> 00:00:56,970 Her name's Jasalyn. 22 00:00:57,300 --> 00:00:58,650 She goes by 'Jaw.' 23 00:00:59,540 --> 00:01:00,600 'Jaw Recorder.' 24 00:01:02,260 --> 00:01:03,160 Do the sound. 25 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:04,820 [DUN DUN] 26 00:01:05,710 --> 00:01:06,680 [dog clicker] 27 00:01:07,840 --> 00:01:10,560 Katia met his eyes as he grabbed her. 28 00:01:10,560 --> 00:01:12,320 He leaned in toward her ear. 29 00:01:12,320 --> 00:01:14,000 His hot breath against her neck sent 30 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:16,670 chills down her spine as he whispered... 31 00:01:16,670 --> 00:01:17,910 "Let's get out of here." 32 00:01:19,080 --> 00:01:20,620 He slowly sid his hand-- 33 00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:24,440 He slowly slid his hand 34 00:01:24,440 --> 00:01:25,330 down her back. 35 00:01:26,180 --> 00:01:27,840 Part of her knew she should run. 36 00:01:28,180 --> 00:01:29,540 but the bigger part 37 00:01:29,540 --> 00:01:31,200 the part that sent a flush to her face 38 00:01:31,200 --> 00:01:32,660 and a quiver down her thighs, 39 00:01:32,940 --> 00:01:35,370 that part obeyed gladly. 40 00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:41,850 [making tea] 41 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:45,050 [silence] 42 00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:46,620 [dog clicker] 43 00:01:47,760 --> 00:01:48,930 The sweat drip 44 00:01:49,300 --> 00:01:50,340 [stomach rumble] 45 00:01:52,420 --> 00:01:53,450 [dog clicker] 46 00:01:54,500 --> 00:01:55,360 The sweat drip 47 00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:56,320 [stomach rumble] 48 00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:57,540 [dog clicker] 49 00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:01,190 The sweat drip 50 00:02:01,190 --> 00:02:02,290 [stomach rumble] 51 00:02:02,290 --> 00:02:03,250 Oh, my god! 52 00:02:03,420 --> 00:02:11,570 [kitchen sounds] 53 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:17,480 [silence] 54 00:02:17,620 --> 00:02:18,170 [dog clicker] 55 00:02:19,910 --> 00:02:22,100 The sweat dripped between her breasts. 56 00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:24,510 The cool breeze played across her 57 00:02:24,510 --> 00:02:27,970 [leaf blower] 58 00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:31,500 [Western guitar] 59 00:02:31,500 --> 00:02:32,340 Four out of five 60 00:02:32,340 --> 00:02:33,840 leaf blower related homicides 61 00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:34,520 are committed by 62 00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:35,890 audiobook narrators. 63 00:02:35,890 --> 00:02:37,410 If a leaf blower is murdered 64 00:02:37,410 --> 00:02:38,560 in your neighborhood 65 00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:39,600 please report any known 66 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:40,750 audiobook narrators 67 00:02:40,750 --> 00:02:42,040 to your local police. 68 00:02:44,000 --> 00:03:15,420 [Western music] 69 00:03:16,620 --> 00:03:17,420 [dog clicker] 70 00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:20,850 The cool breeze played across her 71 00:03:21,110 --> 00:03:28,450 [Facetime ringing] 72 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:30,190 Hey, Richard. 73 00:03:30,190 --> 00:03:31,100 Hey. 74 00:03:31,100 --> 00:03:32,640 I wanted to make sure you got my email. 75 00:03:32,640 --> 00:03:33,200 Oh, no. 76 00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:34,750 I've been recording all morning. 77 00:03:34,870 --> 00:03:36,520 Layla just emailed, 78 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:37,620 said there's a rewrite 79 00:03:37,620 --> 00:03:38,900 coming to the end of the book. 80 00:03:38,900 --> 00:03:40,030 I wanted to make sure you hadn't 81 00:03:40,030 --> 00:03:41,270 gotten to those chapters. 82 00:03:42,170 --> 00:03:42,900 Uh 83 00:03:43,070 --> 00:03:45,040 I'm only on 84 00:03:45,640 --> 00:03:46,660 chapter three. 85 00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:48,880 Three? 86 00:03:48,880 --> 00:03:50,880 Well, I got a little behind 87 00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:51,490 but 88 00:03:51,490 --> 00:03:52,630 I've got my week clear 89 00:03:52,630 --> 00:03:53,290 to get it done. 90 00:03:53,590 --> 00:03:54,270 Well 91 00:03:55,430 --> 00:03:56,410 check your email. 92 00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:57,310 Will do. 93 00:03:57,760 --> 00:03:59,260 And thanks so much for 94 00:04:01,210 --> 00:04:02,600 getting me this book. 95 00:04:04,220 --> 00:04:05,000 [dog clicker] 96 00:04:05,970 --> 00:04:07,850 The cool breeze played across 97 00:04:09,770 --> 00:04:10,680 Damn it. 98 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:13,670 Hey, Carly, what's up? 99 00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:14,860 I got a ton to record. 100 00:04:15,010 --> 00:04:16,740 Okay, just super quick. 101 00:04:16,820 --> 00:04:18,870 Is this headshot too young? 102 00:04:19,980 --> 00:04:21,210 You're kidding, right? 103 00:04:21,520 --> 00:04:23,890 Okay. Uh... 104 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,190 I've been playing around with Photoshop. 105 00:04:28,610 --> 00:04:29,380 What do you think? 106 00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:31,560 Did I go too far? 107 00:04:31,560 --> 00:04:33,460 No, I don't think you went far enough. 108 00:04:33,580 --> 00:04:34,560 How about a halo? 109 00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:35,840 Maybe some puppy ears? 110 00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:37,050 How about some sparkles? 111 00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:38,650 Rude. 112 00:04:38,650 --> 00:04:40,000 Look, I gotta go. 113 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,440 I'm way behind on this book 114 00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:43,200 and I got this new neighbor moving in. 115 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:43,810 I gotta go. 116 00:04:43,810 --> 00:04:44,270 Oh, okay. 117 00:04:44,970 --> 00:04:45,980 Drinks this weekend? 118 00:04:45,980 --> 00:04:46,720 Yes. 119 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:47,280 Bye. 120 00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:48,710 [Facetime call ends] 121 00:04:49,020 --> 00:04:49,600 Okay, great. 122 00:04:50,250 --> 00:04:51,140 [dog clicker] 123 00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:54,410 The cool breeze played 124 00:04:55,610 --> 00:04:56,800 [Door slams upstairs] 125 00:04:57,230 --> 00:04:58,140 [Foot step] 126 00:04:59,110 --> 00:05:00,080 [Foot step] 127 00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:02,340 [Foot step] 128 00:05:02,340 --> 00:05:23,250 [organ music] 129 00:05:24,110 --> 00:05:25,470 It's so quiet here. 130 00:05:26,310 --> 00:05:27,480 [inhales] 131 00:05:27,820 --> 00:05:28,800 Ah! 132 00:05:29,400 --> 00:05:30,160 I love it. 133 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:51,850 [dramatic music] 134 00:05:52,140 --> 00:05:54,770 [silent scream] 135 00:05:55,050 --> 00:05:56,760 [seething] 136 00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:58,890 Muh-mah. 137 00:05:58,890 --> 00:06:01,350 Muh-MAH! 138 00:06:01,350 --> 00:06:05,520 Muh-mah, muh-mah, muh muh-muh-muh mah. 139 00:06:05,670 --> 00:06:06,480 Guh gaw. 140 00:06:06,820 --> 00:06:07,480 Guh gaw. 141 00:06:07,610 --> 00:06:08,730 Guh GAW! 142 00:06:08,820 --> 00:06:09,780 Guh GAW! 143 00:06:09,810 --> 00:06:13,970 Guh-gaw, guh-gaw, guh guh-guh-guh-gaw. 144 00:06:13,970 --> 00:06:14,490 Puh paw. 145 00:06:14,740 --> 00:06:15,320 Puh paw. 146 00:06:15,530 --> 00:06:16,990 Puh PAW! 147 00:06:17,030 --> 00:06:20,720 Puh-paw, puh-paw, puh puh-puh-puh-paw. 148 00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:24,280 [mouth warm ups] 149 00:06:24,500 --> 00:06:26,160 In the audiobook production system 150 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:27,800 listeners will often leave reviews 151 00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:29,200 on the narrator's performance. 152 00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:30,800 These reviews can affect 153 00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:31,780 the sales of the book 154 00:06:32,130 --> 00:06:33,120 and also 155 00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:35,120 whether the narrator is hired again. 156 00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:40,280 Jaw, you're sounding really good. 157 00:06:40,280 --> 00:06:41,140 Thanks, Patty. 158 00:06:41,140 --> 00:06:42,300 I really feel the difference 159 00:06:42,300 --> 00:06:43,500 in my head tones. 160 00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:45,700 Anything else you want to work on? 161 00:06:45,700 --> 00:06:47,270 We have 10 more minutes. 162 00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:49,450 Well, actually, there was. 163 00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:50,400 So... 164 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:51,400 I was looking over my 165 00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:52,480 reviews the other day 166 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,450 You know better than to read reviews. 167 00:06:54,780 --> 00:06:56,740 I know. Normally, I wouldn’t even care 168 00:06:56,740 --> 00:06:58,120 but this one, it really-- 169 00:06:59,280 --> 00:07:00,810 I don't know, I kind of pride myself 170 00:07:00,810 --> 00:07:02,370 when it comes to the steamy parts. 171 00:07:03,100 --> 00:07:04,630 It's your bread and butter. 172 00:07:05,370 --> 00:07:06,300 Well, thank you. 173 00:07:06,630 --> 00:07:08,000 But this reviewer said... 174 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:10,170 well here, let me just read it to you. 175 00:07:11,740 --> 00:07:14,280 The narration of the sex scenes ruined the book. 176 00:07:14,740 --> 00:07:17,480 Apparently, the narrator's take on seduction 177 00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:20,000 is like a grandma bribing children with cookies. 178 00:07:20,510 --> 00:07:22,140 And when she got to the orgasm 179 00:07:22,140 --> 00:07:25,000 she might as well have been reading a shopping list 180 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:27,940 Would give it zero stars if I could. 181 00:07:28,450 --> 00:07:29,940 [smoke] 182 00:07:29,940 --> 00:07:30,400 [poof] 183 00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:33,270 A grandma bribing children? 184 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:35,020 They’re obviously a troll. 185 00:07:35,170 --> 00:07:36,470 Do you think we could 186 00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:38,710 work on 187 00:07:39,100 --> 00:07:41,530 Well, could we work on my... 188 00:07:42,410 --> 00:07:44,320 Well, specifically my... 189 00:07:44,890 --> 00:07:45,710 um... 190 00:07:47,290 --> 00:07:48,920 Your “O” sounds? 191 00:07:49,500 --> 00:07:50,130 Yeah. 192 00:07:50,130 --> 00:07:51,650 Maybe I need some new tricks. 193 00:07:51,650 --> 00:07:52,720 Of course. 194 00:07:53,060 --> 00:07:53,870 Well 195 00:07:53,870 --> 00:07:54,770 for me 196 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:58,180 the orgasm is all about 197 00:07:58,180 --> 00:07:59,980 varying the vowels. 198 00:08:00,510 --> 00:08:00,920 Huh. 199 00:08:01,220 --> 00:08:02,770 Everyone always wants to go 200 00:08:02,770 --> 00:08:04,850 straight for the “O.” 201 00:08:04,850 --> 00:08:05,650 The... 202 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:11,310 "ooooooooh." 203 00:08:11,470 --> 00:08:12,180 But 204 00:08:12,180 --> 00:08:14,180 that leaves four 205 00:08:14,180 --> 00:08:15,610 perfectly good sounds 206 00:08:15,610 --> 00:08:16,560 off the table. 207 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:18,980 Let's start with 208 00:08:19,370 --> 00:08:19,930 “A.” 209 00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:23,570 "A." 210 00:08:24,090 --> 00:08:26,290 "A." 211 00:08:27,330 --> 00:08:28,200 Deeper. 212 00:08:28,620 --> 00:08:30,150 From your ovaries. 213 00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:33,870 "A." 214 00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:36,130 Better. 215 00:08:36,830 --> 00:08:38,690 Now “E” 216 00:08:38,690 --> 00:08:40,080 in repetition. 217 00:08:40,630 --> 00:08:43,470 E, E, E, E. 218 00:08:43,630 --> 00:08:46,720 E, E, E, E. 219 00:08:47,140 --> 00:08:49,200 I, I, I! 220 00:08:49,530 --> 00:08:51,920 I, I, I! 221 00:08:52,820 --> 00:08:54,650 Okay, good. 222 00:08:54,650 --> 00:08:56,100 And finally 223 00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:58,050 the most deadly tool 224 00:08:58,050 --> 00:08:59,840 in your erotic arsenal 225 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:00,850 "U" 226 00:09:00,850 --> 00:09:02,000 It is 227 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:04,590 the pièce de résistance. 228 00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:05,440 Really? 229 00:09:07,290 --> 00:09:10,880 "Uuuuu…" 230 00:09:11,450 --> 00:09:15,120 "Uuuuu…" 231 00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:19,880 [orgasmic vocalizations] 232 00:09:19,880 --> 00:09:21,570 Now, all together. 233 00:09:22,050 --> 00:09:29,600 [muffled orgasmic sounds] 234 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:31,840 Almost there, Jaw. Almost there. 235 00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:33,270 Do the last one again! 236 00:09:33,270 --> 00:09:41,360 [muffled orgasmic sounds] 237 00:09:41,360 --> 00:09:43,280 Like that, Patty? Am I getting it? 238 00:09:43,280 --> 00:09:45,020 Uuuuuuuu 239 00:09:45,020 --> 00:09:48,740 Keep going. Almost there. 240 00:09:48,740 --> 00:09:59,340 [orgasmic vocalizations] 241 00:09:59,340 --> 00:10:00,090 How is it? 242 00:10:00,090 --> 00:10:01,160 So good! 243 00:10:01,160 --> 00:10:02,000 Yes! 244 00:10:03,420 --> 00:10:04,100 And 245 00:10:04,100 --> 00:10:05,840 you can play with 246 00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:08,850 tempo, pitch, volume 247 00:10:08,850 --> 00:10:10,850 with every vowel. 248 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:13,760 You don't think it's a bit much? 249 00:10:14,660 --> 00:10:15,600 Jasalyn 250 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:17,100 your listeners 251 00:10:17,100 --> 00:10:18,030 want 252 00:10:18,030 --> 00:10:19,180 a bit much. 253 00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:20,480 Fair enough. 254 00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:22,160 I'll try it tonight, 255 00:10:22,380 --> 00:10:23,920 Thanks so much, Patty. 256 00:10:25,340 --> 00:10:26,910 [DUN DUN] 257 00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:32,800 [silence] 258 00:10:33,310 --> 00:10:34,220 [dog clicker] 259 00:10:34,510 --> 00:10:36,680 [silence] 260 00:10:37,090 --> 00:10:38,450 O god. 261 00:10:39,420 --> 00:10:40,760 E god. 262 00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:42,680 I god. 263 00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:44,390 Yes 264 00:10:44,770 --> 00:10:45,610 Yes 265 00:10:45,930 --> 00:10:46,630 Yes 266 00:10:46,940 --> 00:10:47,970 Again? 267 00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:50,800 She felt his 268 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:52,640 majestic magnetic cock 269 00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:53,390 pulsing 270 00:10:53,390 --> 00:10:55,690 ripping her orgasm out of her. 271 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,020 Oh, Jake. 272 00:10:57,550 --> 00:10:58,300 Oh 273 00:10:58,700 --> 00:10:59,490 Jake. 274 00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:02,110 Ooooh Jake. 275 00:11:02,750 --> 00:11:03,590 Jake? 276 00:11:04,690 --> 00:11:06,170 What happened to Patty? 277 00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:07,730 Oh! 278 00:11:07,730 --> 00:11:08,780 A! 279 00:11:08,780 --> 00:11:09,560 E! 280 00:11:09,560 --> 00:11:10,400 I! 281 00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:11,250 O! 282 00:11:11,250 --> 00:11:12,960 U! 283 00:11:13,490 --> 00:11:14,910 Ooh, sorry, Jake 284 00:11:15,290 --> 00:11:17,020 but that is not 285 00:11:17,020 --> 00:11:18,370 a real orgasm. 286 00:11:18,370 --> 00:11:20,800 In the world of romance audiobooks 287 00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:21,420 Nailed it. 288 00:11:21,420 --> 00:11:22,590 everyone's a critic. 289 00:11:22,590 --> 00:12:08,610 [motor noise] 290 00:12:08,610 --> 00:12:10,050 Chapter Four. 291 00:12:11,380 --> 00:12:13,610 Jake pulled up to the yard. 292 00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:16,410 He noticed Tilly showering, 293 00:12:16,410 --> 00:12:18,160 the bathroom window open 294 00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:19,840 letting out the steam. 295 00:12:20,550 --> 00:12:21,730 He took a moment to 296 00:12:21,730 --> 00:12:24,050 sit on his motorcycle and watch her. 297 00:12:24,710 --> 00:12:26,720 He longed to be with her 298 00:12:27,390 --> 00:12:29,620 feel the touch of her skin. 299 00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:33,110 His body ached deep inside 300 00:12:33,110 --> 00:12:35,580 and he cherished this private moment 301 00:12:35,580 --> 00:12:37,000 where he could see her 302 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,710 completely unaware. 303 00:12:39,710 --> 00:12:42,710 Under his breath, he whispered, 304 00:12:42,710 --> 00:12:45,800 “Good god, I love that woman.” 305 00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:48,600 His heart pounding out of his chest, 306 00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:50,750 he leaped from his motorcycle 307 00:12:50,750 --> 00:12:53,370 and bounded up the front porch steps. 308 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:56,920 She heard his feet climbing up the stairs 309 00:12:56,920 --> 00:12:57,840 two at a time. 310 00:12:58,620 --> 00:12:59,720 She turned the water off 311 00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:00,560 and then she clutched 312 00:13:00,560 --> 00:13:01,800 her towel at her breast. 313 00:13:02,700 --> 00:13:03,690 Jake was in the door 314 00:13:03,690 --> 00:13:04,640 faster than she could even 315 00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:06,260 get the towel over her body. 316 00:13:06,830 --> 00:13:09,630 “I hope you're not planning on drying off," 317 00:13:09,630 --> 00:13:11,340 he said gruffly, 318 00:13:11,340 --> 00:13:13,090 "cuz I'm about to make you wet.” 319 00:13:14,210 --> 00:13:16,430 "Jake! I thought you were coming on Friday." 320 00:13:17,010 --> 00:13:18,310 "Plans change. 321 00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:20,510 Now, speaking of coming..." 322 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:23,450 Ah... 323 00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:25,420 [relaxing sounds] 324 00:13:26,620 --> 00:13:38,750 [upbeat music] 325 00:13:38,750 --> 00:13:39,540 Hey, Richard. 326 00:13:39,990 --> 00:13:41,040 Hey, Richard. 327 00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:42,050 Hey, Richard. 328 00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:43,250 Hey, Richard. 329 00:13:43,540 --> 00:13:44,500 It’s Jasalyn. 330 00:13:45,150 --> 00:13:46,180 It's Jasalyn. 331 00:13:46,430 --> 00:13:47,280 It's Jasalyn. 332 00:13:47,580 --> 00:13:48,960 Hey, I got your email. 333 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:51,210 Hey, Richard, 334 00:13:51,210 --> 00:13:52,670 can I call you Dick? 335 00:13:53,710 --> 00:13:56,010 Oh my gosh, I'd love to talk shop. 336 00:13:56,010 --> 00:13:59,090 Oh, I’d love to go out for a drink. 337 00:13:59,090 --> 00:13:59,930 Talk shop. 338 00:13:59,930 --> 00:14:02,430 I’d love to go on a date with you. 339 00:14:02,430 --> 00:14:03,760 Talk romance? 340 00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:07,060 Since we are playing love interests, 341 00:14:07,060 --> 00:14:09,810 and we read complementing sex scenes... 342 00:14:09,810 --> 00:14:11,590 "Complementing sex scenes." 343 00:14:11,940 --> 00:14:13,690 Complementing sex scenes. 344 00:14:13,690 --> 00:14:15,510 I am a human. 345 00:14:15,900 --> 00:14:17,560 Take me out to dinner. 346 00:14:18,390 --> 00:14:19,600 I like to drink. 347 00:14:20,140 --> 00:14:27,830 [upbeat music] 348 00:14:27,830 --> 00:14:28,830 Hey, Richard. 349 00:14:28,830 --> 00:14:29,460 Hey. 350 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:31,250 I got your email. 351 00:14:31,630 --> 00:14:32,460 Hey. 352 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:34,920 Ooh, red. 353 00:14:36,420 --> 00:14:37,310 We could... 354 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:38,940 ...have a drink. 355 00:14:40,220 --> 00:14:41,250 Talk romance. 356 00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:45,850 ♪  I don't want to be a loser  ♪ 357 00:14:45,850 --> 00:14:47,650 ♪  Just another good girl  ♪ 358 00:14:47,650 --> 00:14:50,310 ♪  you use to get anything you want  ♪ 359 00:14:50,570 --> 00:14:53,540 ♪  Trick my heart but I know better  ♪ 360 00:14:53,540 --> 00:14:55,540 ♪  than to be maneuvered  ♪ 361 00:14:55,740 --> 00:14:58,370 ♪  and let you ditch me when you're done  ♪ 362 00:14:59,740 --> 00:15:05,370 [silence] 363 00:15:05,570 --> 00:15:06,660 [Facetime ringing] 364 00:15:06,660 --> 00:15:07,680 Hey, Richard. 365 00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:08,830 Hi. 366 00:15:08,830 --> 00:15:10,830 [Facetime rings] 367 00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:12,320 Hey, Richard. 368 00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:14,240 It's Jasalyn. 369 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:16,110 You can call me Jaw. 370 00:15:16,460 --> 00:15:18,250 I do not have a jaw at that angle. 371 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:21,600 Oh, that's good. Yeah. 372 00:15:22,850 --> 00:15:30,080 [Facetime ringing] 373 00:15:31,000 --> 00:16:03,770 [suspenseful music] 374 00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:06,390 Tonight! 375 00:16:06,390 --> 00:16:08,820 Things are heating up in the villa, 376 00:16:08,820 --> 00:16:11,770 when new lads are introduced to the mix 377 00:16:11,770 --> 00:16:14,100 and nobody can find their clothes! 378 00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:26,540 [Facetime ringing] 379 00:16:26,850 --> 00:16:27,800 [gasp] 380 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:30,450 Richard, hi. 381 00:16:31,370 --> 00:16:32,830 Hi. You called me? 382 00:16:34,390 --> 00:16:35,580 Yeah, I did. 383 00:16:36,830 --> 00:16:37,710 What’s up? 384 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:41,570 I got your email and... 385 00:16:41,980 --> 00:16:43,630 And I was wondering... 386 00:16:44,340 --> 00:16:45,220 Oh no. 387 00:16:45,970 --> 00:16:47,340 Are you missing a tooth? 388 00:16:48,430 --> 00:16:48,850 What? 389 00:16:50,220 --> 00:16:50,970 Oh. 390 00:16:53,330 --> 00:16:54,140 I was just... 391 00:16:55,020 --> 00:16:56,150 ...eating some chocolate. 392 00:16:56,980 --> 00:16:57,670 Oh, man. 393 00:16:58,440 --> 00:16:59,840 Thought you were gonna say you can't record 394 00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:01,520 because you lost a bridge or something. 395 00:17:02,190 --> 00:17:03,650 No, I have all my teeth. 396 00:17:04,610 --> 00:17:06,090 I was just eating 397 00:17:08,030 --> 00:17:08,700 some cake. 398 00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:11,510 [silence] 399 00:17:12,540 --> 00:17:13,520 So... 400 00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:14,790 what’s up? 401 00:17:17,250 --> 00:17:17,960 Well... 402 00:17:19,130 --> 00:17:20,290 I got your email 403 00:17:21,070 --> 00:17:21,830 Yeah...? 404 00:17:22,410 --> 00:17:24,230 And I was 405 00:17:25,450 --> 00:17:26,720 wondering 406 00:17:28,660 --> 00:17:29,610 Yes? 407 00:17:29,970 --> 00:17:31,440 I was wondering 408 00:17:32,110 --> 00:17:33,170 Um... 409 00:17:35,850 --> 00:17:47,570 [suspenseful music] 410 00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:49,250 Um... 411 00:17:50,170 --> 00:17:51,210 how you were pronouncing 412 00:17:51,210 --> 00:17:52,330 the main guy's name. 413 00:17:54,090 --> 00:17:54,830 Jake? 414 00:17:57,130 --> 00:17:58,970 Yeah, Jake. 415 00:18:01,370 --> 00:18:02,670 How else would you say it? 416 00:18:03,370 --> 00:18:04,670 Uh... 417 00:18:06,110 --> 00:18:06,880 Jock? 418 00:18:08,260 --> 00:18:08,960 Jock? 419 00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:10,890 So Jake? 420 00:18:12,010 --> 00:18:12,720 Jake. 421 00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:15,680 Cool. That's how I was doing it. 422 00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:17,550 And thanks so much 423 00:18:17,550 --> 00:18:18,940 for getting me this book. 424 00:18:18,940 --> 00:18:20,770 I’m a huge romance fan. 425 00:18:20,770 --> 00:18:21,750 You might say 426 00:18:22,940 --> 00:18:24,560 romance is kind of my thing. 427 00:18:25,360 --> 00:18:25,900 Oh. 428 00:18:26,900 --> 00:18:27,660 Cool. 429 00:18:28,700 --> 00:18:29,240 Well. 430 00:18:29,910 --> 00:18:30,640 I gotta go. 431 00:18:30,780 --> 00:18:32,700 Okay. bye. 432 00:18:35,290 --> 00:18:37,050 "Romance is kind of my thing?" 433 00:18:38,050 --> 00:18:40,970 [fork sounds] 434 00:18:42,310 --> 00:18:43,920 Romance is kind of my thing. 435 00:18:45,430 --> 00:18:48,010 I'm just real romantic. 436 00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:49,680 Queen Romance. 437 00:18:51,370 --> 00:18:52,590 With chocolate all over my teeth. 438 00:18:53,140 --> 00:18:55,310 [peaceful quiet] 439 00:18:55,540 --> 00:18:56,510 [Sigh] 440 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:07,490 [motor noise] 441 00:19:07,490 --> 00:19:09,010 What the fuck is that sound? 442 00:19:09,010 --> 00:19:34,420 [motor noise] 443 00:19:34,420 --> 00:19:35,070 Hello. 444 00:19:35,070 --> 00:19:37,200 No one is available to take your call. 445 00:19:37,980 --> 00:19:39,440 Hey, Mr. Patino. 446 00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:41,690 It's Jasalyn in Apartment 205. 447 00:19:42,240 --> 00:19:43,600 I'm calling because there's this 448 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:44,510 weird motor sound 449 00:19:44,510 --> 00:19:46,100 that I'm hearing like all night. 450 00:19:46,100 --> 00:19:47,590 I think it's coming from the new guy 451 00:19:47,590 --> 00:19:48,850 that just moved in, 452 00:19:49,060 --> 00:19:49,890 So... 453 00:19:49,890 --> 00:19:51,260 I'm wondering if you could 454 00:19:51,260 --> 00:19:52,520 talk to him or 455 00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:53,910 figure out what's going on. 456 00:19:54,450 --> 00:19:55,440 Uh, thanks. 457 00:19:55,710 --> 00:19:56,230 Bye. 458 00:19:56,230 --> 00:20:00,450 [motor noise] 459 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:02,390 "How dare you?" 460 00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,890 Katia slapped Tilly across the face. 461 00:20:05,890 --> 00:20:07,160 Jake grabbed her, 462 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:08,710 her shoulders now exposed. 463 00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:11,460 With his firm grip on her waist, 464 00:20:12,170 --> 00:20:16,480 [silence] 465 00:20:17,170 --> 00:20:18,220 [dog clicker] 466 00:20:19,300 --> 00:20:21,490 With his firm grip on her waist, 467 00:20:21,490 --> 00:20:22,930 Jake pushed her out of the room 468 00:20:22,930 --> 00:20:23,790 and shut the door. 469 00:20:24,550 --> 00:20:25,580 "Calm down." 470 00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:28,050 "She is on my last nerve." 471 00:20:28,620 --> 00:20:29,410 "I know. 472 00:20:29,790 --> 00:20:31,250 Take a deep breath 473 00:20:31,250 --> 00:20:32,400 and let's see if we can't 474 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,500 do something to settle those nerves." 475 00:20:35,500 --> 00:20:37,460 His calloused hands slid up 476 00:20:37,460 --> 00:20:41,000 [ukulele above] 477 00:20:42,450 --> 00:20:44,000 [dog clicker] 478 00:20:46,170 --> 00:20:47,910 His calloused hands slid 479 00:20:48,510 --> 00:20:51,570 [ukulele above] 480 00:20:53,770 --> 00:20:54,510 [dog clicker] 481 00:20:54,810 --> 00:20:56,260 His calloused hand 482 00:20:56,260 --> 00:21:02,700 [singing and ukulele from above] 483 00:21:02,700 --> 00:21:04,620 Jasalyn is not the type to confront. 484 00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:06,270 She hates confrontation. 485 00:21:06,610 --> 00:21:07,800 She thinks maybe she can wait 486 00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:09,090 for the music to stop. 487 00:21:11,670 --> 00:21:12,590 No. 488 00:21:12,590 --> 00:21:14,260 It's time to face the music. 489 00:21:14,260 --> 00:21:16,170 Guess I gotta put on a bra... 490 00:21:16,170 --> 00:21:20,750 [singing and ukulele] 491 00:21:20,750 --> 00:21:21,980 Ah, fuck it. 492 00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,910 [foot steps] 493 00:21:26,140 --> 00:21:44,420 [singing and ukulele] 494 00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:48,080 [wonderful silence] 495 00:21:50,330 --> 00:21:51,120 Hi. 496 00:21:51,120 --> 00:21:52,910 I am your downstairs neighbor. 497 00:21:52,910 --> 00:21:53,500 Oh. 498 00:21:53,740 --> 00:21:57,510 [orgasm sounds] 499 00:21:58,130 --> 00:21:59,040 Oh. 500 00:22:00,090 --> 00:22:01,300 I'm Larry, it's 501 00:22:01,300 --> 00:22:02,090 nice to meet you. 502 00:22:02,090 --> 00:22:03,800 Jasalyn. So... 503 00:22:05,340 --> 00:22:06,380 I work from home. 504 00:22:06,930 --> 00:22:08,260 Must be nice to work in your robe. 505 00:22:08,470 --> 00:22:10,050 Yeah, not having to get dressed 506 00:22:10,050 --> 00:22:11,220 is an added perk. 507 00:22:11,510 --> 00:22:13,100 You know, I uh... 508 00:22:13,100 --> 00:22:13,890 I think I heard you working 509 00:22:13,890 --> 00:22:14,890 when I was moving in. 510 00:22:15,270 --> 00:22:15,810 Oh. 511 00:22:15,810 --> 00:22:17,770 I didn't realize I could be heard up here. 512 00:22:17,770 --> 00:22:18,230 Well 513 00:22:18,230 --> 00:22:19,730 the apartment was completely empty 514 00:22:19,730 --> 00:22:21,270 so I think sound carries more. 515 00:22:21,270 --> 00:22:23,400 and it was really only during the 516 00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:24,770 Oh, yes! 517 00:22:25,250 --> 00:22:26,200 Oh! 518 00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:28,780 Peak moments. 519 00:22:29,110 --> 00:22:31,990 I do really get into the role playing of it all. 520 00:22:31,990 --> 00:22:34,330 Jasalyn is unaware that Larry believes 521 00:22:34,330 --> 00:22:35,580 she is a prostitute. 522 00:22:35,580 --> 00:22:37,750 Which is actually why I'm here. 523 00:22:37,750 --> 00:22:38,960 I had to stop because 524 00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:41,290 I could hear you playing an instrument. 525 00:22:41,670 --> 00:22:42,920 Oh, my ukulele. 526 00:22:43,250 --> 00:22:44,550 Yeah, you were playing 527 00:22:44,550 --> 00:22:45,760 right above where I work. 528 00:22:46,130 --> 00:22:47,550 Oh, well, uh... 529 00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:48,380 Why don't you show me 530 00:22:48,380 --> 00:22:49,010 where you're working 531 00:22:49,010 --> 00:22:50,470 and then I can make sure I'm 532 00:22:50,930 --> 00:22:52,010 you know, I’m 533 00:22:52,010 --> 00:22:52,760 not there. 534 00:22:53,010 --> 00:22:53,930 Oh! 535 00:22:53,930 --> 00:22:55,310 Yeah, that'd be great. 536 00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:58,020 [closet door sliding[ 537 00:22:58,310 --> 00:23:00,150 In the closet? Really? 538 00:23:00,150 --> 00:23:00,980 Yeah. 539 00:23:00,980 --> 00:23:02,520 A lot of people do it in the closet. 540 00:23:02,900 --> 00:23:04,780 It's kind of an industry standard now. 541 00:23:04,780 --> 00:23:06,440 Oh, I didn't realize. 542 00:23:06,860 --> 00:23:08,700 Yeah, I wouldn't think you would. 543 00:23:08,700 --> 00:23:11,000 [sliding door shut] 544 00:23:11,660 --> 00:23:13,240 So do you do it like... 545 00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:14,160 every day? 546 00:23:14,910 --> 00:23:16,290 Yeah, pretty much. 547 00:23:16,290 --> 00:23:18,040 I mean, there's always dry spells, 548 00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:19,540 but for the most part, every day. 549 00:23:19,790 --> 00:23:20,710 Wow. 550 00:23:21,540 --> 00:23:22,710 I hope it's good money. 551 00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:24,090 It depends on the rate. 552 00:23:24,460 --> 00:23:25,250 And the book. 553 00:23:25,590 --> 00:23:27,010 You mean how long they book you for? 554 00:23:27,260 --> 00:23:28,050 Kind of. 555 00:23:28,050 --> 00:23:28,670 I mean, there's 556 00:23:28,670 --> 00:23:31,180 usually a general schedule but 557 00:23:31,180 --> 00:23:33,140 it takes as long as it takes, you know? 558 00:23:33,140 --> 00:23:35,060 I'm paid by the hour, so 559 00:23:35,060 --> 00:23:36,680 I try to go as slow, you know. 560 00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:37,310 really 561 00:23:37,310 --> 00:23:38,270 milk it out. 562 00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:40,980 Oh. 563 00:23:41,310 --> 00:23:43,230 But when it's a really long one 564 00:23:43,230 --> 00:23:44,440 my throat gets really sore 565 00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:45,570 and I have to take breaks. 566 00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:47,900 Oh. 567 00:23:48,940 --> 00:23:49,700 That's 568 00:23:49,700 --> 00:23:51,110 brave of you to share. 569 00:23:51,530 --> 00:23:52,200 Well, it's like that 570 00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:53,660 with every profession, right? 571 00:23:53,660 --> 00:23:54,620 Gotta take breaks. 572 00:23:54,620 --> 00:23:55,910 Uh, yeah, I uh... 573 00:23:57,370 --> 00:23:58,500 I take breaks too. 574 00:24:00,660 --> 00:24:02,040 Is that an air mattress? 575 00:24:02,040 --> 00:24:03,210 Yeah. 576 00:24:04,380 --> 00:24:05,920 I've tried all kinds of beds 577 00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:07,380 and this keeps me the coolest. 578 00:24:07,380 --> 00:24:07,920 Also 579 00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:09,460 it's super easy to clean off. 580 00:24:09,460 --> 00:24:10,170 You just 581 00:24:10,170 --> 00:24:11,720 take it outside and hose it off. 582 00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:13,340 You might find that useful. 583 00:24:14,050 --> 00:24:14,850 Why? 584 00:24:16,510 --> 00:24:17,220 Um. 585 00:24:17,970 --> 00:24:18,890 Hygiene? 586 00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:21,100 Oh. 587 00:24:21,350 --> 00:24:21,980 And yeah 588 00:24:21,980 --> 00:24:22,690 people complain about 589 00:24:22,690 --> 00:24:23,690 them losing air? 590 00:24:23,690 --> 00:24:24,520 But I just leave 591 00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:25,940 the motor running all night. 592 00:24:26,540 --> 00:24:29,340 Allll niiiiight 593 00:24:29,860 --> 00:24:30,570 And what’s great is 594 00:24:30,570 --> 00:24:32,200 I don’t need a white noise machine 595 00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:33,700 because you're hearing the motor. 596 00:24:33,700 --> 00:24:34,660 I can't hear a thing. 597 00:24:34,660 --> 00:24:35,870 You could be screaming in your apartment 598 00:24:35,870 --> 00:24:37,530 and I wouldn't hear anything. 599 00:24:38,700 --> 00:24:40,620 Yeah, it's 600 00:24:40,620 --> 00:24:41,460 pretty loud. 601 00:24:41,460 --> 00:24:42,410 You know, before I started 602 00:24:42,410 --> 00:24:43,750 using this air mattress strategy 603 00:24:43,750 --> 00:24:45,920 I had a really bad sleep disorder. 604 00:24:46,340 --> 00:24:47,340 But this has cured it. 605 00:24:47,630 --> 00:24:48,670 Cured it completely. 606 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:49,590 Overnight. 607 00:24:49,590 --> 00:24:51,010 I was on a CPAP machine, 608 00:24:51,010 --> 00:24:52,170 I was taking blood thinners, 609 00:24:52,170 --> 00:24:53,510 I was doing blood thickeners. 610 00:24:53,680 --> 00:24:54,680 Nothing worked 611 00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:55,840 except this air mattress. 612 00:24:56,970 --> 00:24:58,010 It's the best. 613 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:01,140 [awkward silence] 614 00:25:01,850 --> 00:25:02,640 Well... 615 00:25:02,980 --> 00:25:05,520 You got the gist of where I work 616 00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:06,270 and 617 00:25:06,980 --> 00:25:08,480 where I need it quiet. 618 00:25:08,610 --> 00:25:09,110 Yes. 619 00:25:09,110 --> 00:25:10,480 Yes, and thank you for being direct. 620 00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:11,530 I really appreciate it. 621 00:25:11,690 --> 00:25:12,280 Yeah. 622 00:25:12,610 --> 00:25:13,650 Of course. 623 00:25:13,650 --> 00:25:14,780 I like keeping it real. 624 00:25:14,910 --> 00:25:15,570 Totally. 625 00:25:15,950 --> 00:25:16,780 Hold on. 626 00:25:16,780 --> 00:25:19,820 [phone ringing] 627 00:25:21,450 --> 00:25:22,020 Uh... 628 00:25:22,580 --> 00:25:23,910 Mr. Patino, hi. 629 00:25:24,450 --> 00:25:26,710 [muffled voice] 630 00:25:27,130 --> 00:25:28,290 Oh, really? 631 00:25:29,170 --> 00:25:29,920 Someone complained 632 00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:30,800 about a motor noise 633 00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:32,420 coming from my apartment. 634 00:25:33,130 --> 00:25:34,010 Okay. 635 00:25:34,010 --> 00:25:35,300 Thanks for letting me know. 636 00:25:35,910 --> 00:25:40,050 [hostile silence] 637 00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:41,060 Well 638 00:25:41,060 --> 00:25:43,050 I should get back to work. 639 00:25:45,650 --> 00:25:47,340 [blows lips] 640 00:25:49,710 --> 00:25:50,850 [dog clicker] 641 00:25:51,980 --> 00:25:53,150 His calloused hands 642 00:25:53,150 --> 00:25:54,440 slid up to her shoulders. 643 00:25:54,740 --> 00:25:56,150 Her heart was pounding. 644 00:25:56,530 --> 00:25:57,410 She breathed in slow 645 00:25:57,410 --> 00:26:01,280 [singing and ukulele] 646 00:26:02,140 --> 00:26:06,680 [terse silence] 647 00:26:07,460 --> 00:26:07,870 Hey. 648 00:26:07,870 --> 00:26:08,920 you're still playing your music 649 00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:09,790 right above me. 650 00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:11,920 Well. 651 00:26:12,300 --> 00:26:14,090 As long as it's not my air mattress, 652 00:26:14,090 --> 00:26:15,670 I don't see what the problem is. 653 00:26:16,010 --> 00:26:16,260 What? 654 00:26:18,090 --> 00:26:19,260 I know it was you. 655 00:26:19,890 --> 00:26:21,350 You don't know it was me. 656 00:26:21,350 --> 00:26:22,890 That motor is really loud. 657 00:26:22,890 --> 00:26:24,220 I'm sure everybody hears it. 658 00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:25,140 And by "everyone" 659 00:26:25,140 --> 00:26:26,390 you mean your client. 660 00:26:26,810 --> 00:26:27,480 Listen 661 00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,310 I cannot be delayed anymore. 662 00:26:29,310 --> 00:26:30,610 Can you please play your music 663 00:26:30,610 --> 00:26:31,940 in the other room please? 664 00:26:31,940 --> 00:26:33,030 Why don't you do your work 665 00:26:33,030 --> 00:26:33,690 in the other room? 666 00:26:33,690 --> 00:26:34,480 I can't. 667 00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:35,240 Right. Sure. 668 00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:36,530 Larry, do you have any idea 669 00:26:36,530 --> 00:26:37,820 how sensitive my mic is? 670 00:26:37,820 --> 00:26:38,820 It picks up everything. 671 00:26:39,280 --> 00:26:39,950 Your mic? 672 00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:41,200 For the recording. 673 00:26:42,780 --> 00:26:43,700 You're recording? 674 00:26:44,120 --> 00:26:44,700 Yeah! 675 00:26:44,950 --> 00:26:46,290 I thought you were... 676 00:26:47,410 --> 00:26:48,580 You know, doing it live. 677 00:26:48,790 --> 00:26:49,210 What? 678 00:26:49,370 --> 00:26:49,960 No. 679 00:26:50,290 --> 00:26:51,210 How would that even work? 680 00:26:51,210 --> 00:26:52,500 Well... I don't know. 681 00:26:52,500 --> 00:26:53,960 Larry is now under the assumption 682 00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:55,880 that Jasalyn is what is known as 683 00:26:55,880 --> 00:26:56,760 a "camgirl." 684 00:26:57,090 --> 00:26:58,300 a video performer 685 00:26:58,300 --> 00:27:00,140 who does erotic acts online 686 00:27:00,140 --> 00:27:01,090 such as stripping, 687 00:27:01,090 --> 00:27:02,050 masturbation, 688 00:27:02,050 --> 00:27:03,100 or provocative gyrating 689 00:27:03,100 --> 00:27:04,140 in exchange for money. 690 00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:05,770 So you’re alone down there? 691 00:27:06,310 --> 00:27:07,600 Of course I'm alone. 692 00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:08,440 Don't you know anything? 693 00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:09,230 Well, not about that. 694 00:27:09,230 --> 00:27:10,440 I’ve never bought one. 695 00:27:10,770 --> 00:27:11,980 Well, you should be grateful 696 00:27:11,980 --> 00:27:12,860 you don't have to. 697 00:27:12,860 --> 00:27:13,730 Nobody has to. 698 00:27:13,730 --> 00:27:14,440 Uh... 699 00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:16,650 what about people with disabilities, Larry? 700 00:27:16,650 --> 00:27:17,650 Blind people. 701 00:27:17,650 --> 00:27:18,650 You ever think about that? 702 00:27:18,990 --> 00:27:19,650 No. 703 00:27:19,820 --> 00:27:20,780 Well, think about that, Larry. 704 00:27:21,030 --> 00:27:22,950 The next time you want to interrupt my work 705 00:27:22,950 --> 00:27:24,790 think about all those blind people. 706 00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:26,620 You're not hurting me, Larry. 707 00:27:26,620 --> 00:27:27,580 You're hurting them. 708 00:27:27,700 --> 00:27:28,040 Fine 709 00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:29,540 I'll play my ukulele in the other room. 710 00:27:29,750 --> 00:27:30,370 Thank you. 711 00:27:30,370 --> 00:27:32,040 Thank you on behalf of all those in need. 712 00:27:32,770 --> 00:27:34,370 Jesus, give a girl a webcam and 713 00:27:34,370 --> 00:27:36,370 and she thinks she's Mother Theresa 714 00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:38,000 “You're not hurting me, Larry” 715 00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:39,080 "you're hurting them." 716 00:27:39,620 --> 00:27:40,250 Yeah. 717 00:27:40,250 --> 00:27:41,310 That was a good one. 718 00:27:41,310 --> 00:27:42,420 You put him in his place. 719 00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:46,340 Wait, a webcam girl for the blind? 720 00:27:48,220 --> 00:27:50,110 [DUN DUN] 721 00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:56,170 [silence] 722 00:27:56,600 --> 00:27:58,430 In the audiobook production system 723 00:27:58,430 --> 00:28:00,270 there are two types of narrators. 724 00:28:02,060 --> 00:28:02,650 and those that sometimes venture out Those that are strictly behind a mic 725 00:28:02,650 --> 00:28:03,390 and those that sometimes venture out 726 00:28:03,390 --> 00:28:04,810 and get in front of the camera. 727 00:28:05,350 --> 00:28:06,440 These are their stories. 728 00:28:06,770 --> 00:28:07,690 Hey! 729 00:28:07,770 --> 00:28:08,690 Hi. 730 00:28:08,730 --> 00:28:09,820 I like your setup. 731 00:28:10,570 --> 00:28:12,110 Thank you so much for helping me. 732 00:28:12,110 --> 00:28:14,570 I haven't done a self tape audition in forever. 733 00:28:14,570 --> 00:28:15,570 I'm really nervous. 734 00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:17,450 You're reading General Knox 735 00:28:17,450 --> 00:28:19,370 who I think is George Clooney? 736 00:28:19,660 --> 00:28:21,080 They haven't announced it officially yet 737 00:28:21,080 --> 00:28:22,910 but that seems to be the part that he would play. 738 00:28:22,910 --> 00:28:24,790 Oh my God, that's so exciting. 739 00:28:25,370 --> 00:28:27,080 Do you want to just jump in? 740 00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:29,210 Should I point once I hit record? 741 00:28:29,210 --> 00:28:31,210 Yeah, just give me a “one, two,” and point. 742 00:28:31,670 --> 00:28:33,800 Like, "one, two, three, action!" 743 00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:37,100 Yeah, but don't say the three, or action. 744 00:28:38,970 --> 00:28:39,680 Oh. 745 00:28:39,680 --> 00:28:41,310 Just say “one, two,” point. 746 00:28:41,970 --> 00:28:43,140 Like one, two 747 00:28:43,140 --> 00:28:43,770 point. 748 00:28:44,020 --> 00:28:44,770 Don't say “point.” 749 00:28:45,190 --> 00:28:45,850 Obviously. 750 00:28:46,230 --> 00:28:47,560 And let me know when you hit record. 751 00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:51,110 All right. Hitting record. 752 00:28:51,230 --> 00:28:52,440 No, say “rolling.” 753 00:28:53,150 --> 00:28:53,650 Rolling? 754 00:28:53,650 --> 00:28:54,650 When you hit record. 755 00:28:54,820 --> 00:28:55,320 Well 756 00:28:55,490 --> 00:28:57,280 say rolling and then 757 00:28:57,280 --> 00:28:58,030 hit record. 758 00:28:59,580 --> 00:29:00,280 Should I stop it? 759 00:29:00,530 --> 00:29:01,250 Yes. 760 00:29:01,710 --> 00:29:02,450 [camera beep] 761 00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:05,000 Rolling 762 00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:05,500 One 763 00:29:05,500 --> 00:29:05,830 Oh 764 00:29:05,830 --> 00:29:07,120 but don't hit the button 765 00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:07,960 and then say “one,” 766 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:08,960 hit the button on “two.” 767 00:29:10,540 --> 00:29:12,210 So say “rolling, one,” 768 00:29:12,590 --> 00:29:13,880 ...hit record as you say “two,” 769 00:29:13,880 --> 00:29:15,050 and then point. 770 00:29:15,930 --> 00:29:17,260 Oh, okay. 771 00:29:18,590 --> 00:29:19,550 Rolling... 772 00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:20,550 one... 773 00:29:21,100 --> 00:29:21,720 two... 774 00:29:23,470 --> 00:29:24,140 Hi. 775 00:29:24,140 --> 00:29:25,730 I am Carly Sloan 776 00:29:25,730 --> 00:29:26,810 and I am reading 777 00:29:27,980 --> 00:29:29,190 I'm going to try that again. 778 00:29:30,220 --> 00:29:31,680 [nervous breathing] 779 00:29:32,190 --> 00:29:33,400 Okay. 780 00:29:33,730 --> 00:29:35,820 Rolling. One, two. 781 00:29:37,530 --> 00:29:38,240 Hi. 782 00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:39,410 I am Carly Sloan 783 00:29:39,410 --> 00:29:41,280 and I am reading for scientist 784 00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:41,990 number three 785 00:29:42,700 --> 00:29:43,660 When will we know 786 00:29:43,660 --> 00:29:45,330 if the treatment is usable? 787 00:29:47,500 --> 00:29:48,710 Are you gonna do it like that? 788 00:29:48,750 --> 00:29:49,420 Yeah, that's like 789 00:29:49,420 --> 00:29:50,960 one of my best guy voices. 790 00:29:51,500 --> 00:29:52,170 Uh-huh. 791 00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:53,960 Maybe just take it down a notch. 792 00:29:54,420 --> 00:29:55,340 Like smaller? 793 00:29:55,460 --> 00:29:56,340 Much smaller. 794 00:29:56,800 --> 00:29:57,380 I can do that. 795 00:29:57,760 --> 00:29:58,300 Okay. 796 00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:01,220 Rolling. One, two... 797 00:30:01,930 --> 00:30:03,600 Hi. I'm Carly Sloan, 798 00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:04,430 and I am reading 799 00:30:04,430 --> 00:30:05,890 for Scientist Number 3. 800 00:30:07,060 --> 00:30:07,730 When will we know 801 00:30:07,730 --> 00:30:09,020 if the treatment is usable? 802 00:30:09,810 --> 00:30:11,110 Dr. Erickson reported 803 00:30:11,110 --> 00:30:12,310 the dodecahedron 804 00:30:13,980 --> 00:30:15,530 Should I wear my glasses, do you think? 805 00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:17,740 Oh, ‘cause she's a scientist. 806 00:30:17,950 --> 00:30:18,610 Yeah. 807 00:30:18,610 --> 00:30:19,530 Definitely. Yeah. 808 00:30:20,030 --> 00:30:20,740 Great idea. 809 00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:24,820 [glasses fidgeting] 810 00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:26,620 Go for it. 811 00:30:26,790 --> 00:30:29,370 Okay. Rolling. One, two... 812 00:30:30,540 --> 00:30:32,460 Hi. I'm Carly Sloan 813 00:30:32,460 --> 00:30:33,540 Wait, cut. 814 00:30:33,750 --> 00:30:34,800 Why don't you 815 00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:35,920 put the glasses on 816 00:30:35,920 --> 00:30:36,920 after the intro 817 00:30:36,920 --> 00:30:37,840 so it's like 818 00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:39,300 "Hi, Carly Sloan." 819 00:30:39,300 --> 00:30:39,970 "How you doing?" 820 00:30:39,970 --> 00:30:41,510 and then boom. 821 00:30:41,510 --> 00:30:43,010 Serious Mrs. Science Woman. 822 00:30:43,010 --> 00:30:43,890 Ooh, I like that. 823 00:30:43,890 --> 00:30:44,180 Yeah? 824 00:30:44,180 --> 00:30:45,390 Yeah, that's good. Okay. 825 00:30:46,140 --> 00:30:48,140 Rolling. One, two. 826 00:30:48,730 --> 00:30:49,980 Hi. I’m Carly Sloan 827 00:30:49,980 --> 00:30:50,640 and I am reading 828 00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:52,020 for Scientist Number 3. 829 00:30:52,270 --> 00:30:52,980 When will we know 830 00:30:52,980 --> 00:30:54,020 if the treatment is usable? 831 00:30:54,360 --> 00:30:55,480 Dr. Erickson reported 832 00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:56,440 that the dodecahedron 833 00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:57,400 mass collider trials 834 00:30:57,400 --> 00:30:58,110 led to unexpected 835 00:30:58,110 --> 00:30:59,240 geometric sequencing. 836 00:30:59,610 --> 00:31:00,650 So we don't know. 837 00:31:01,820 --> 00:31:02,450 Great. 838 00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:04,330 I think I can do better. 839 00:31:04,330 --> 00:31:04,870 Okay. 840 00:31:05,530 --> 00:31:07,410 Rolling. One, two. 841 00:31:07,950 --> 00:31:09,710 Hi. I'm Carly Sloan 842 00:31:09,710 --> 00:31:10,460 and I am reading 843 00:31:10,460 --> 00:31:12,040 for Scientist Number 3. 844 00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:13,460 When will we know 845 00:31:13,460 --> 00:31:14,630 if the treatment is usable? 846 00:31:14,790 --> 00:31:15,840 Dr. Erickson reported 847 00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:16,630 the dodecahedron 848 00:31:16,630 --> 00:31:17,590 mass collider trials 849 00:31:17,590 --> 00:31:19,470 led to unexpected geometric sequencing. 850 00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:20,720 So we don't show. 851 00:31:21,430 --> 00:31:22,260 Oh, shit. 852 00:31:22,260 --> 00:31:22,840 It's okay. 853 00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:23,590 We don't "know." 854 00:31:23,590 --> 00:31:24,350 One more time. 855 00:31:24,550 --> 00:31:25,260 I'm Carly Sloan-- 856 00:31:25,260 --> 00:31:26,720 Wait... I gotta count you in. 857 00:31:26,720 --> 00:31:27,470 Ah, right. 858 00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:29,480 Rolling. One, two. 859 00:31:30,270 --> 00:31:31,350 Hi. 860 00:31:31,350 --> 00:31:31,810 Hello. 861 00:31:31,810 --> 00:31:32,140 Hi. 862 00:31:32,140 --> 00:31:33,100 Hello. I'm Carly Sloan. 863 00:31:33,100 --> 00:31:34,020 I'm Carly Sloan. 864 00:31:34,020 --> 00:31:35,690 I'm Carly Sloan, and I am auditioning 865 00:31:35,690 --> 00:31:36,610 and I am reading 866 00:31:36,610 --> 00:31:38,360 and I am auditioning for Scientist 3. 867 00:31:38,360 --> 00:31:40,110 dodecahedron mass collider trials 868 00:31:40,110 --> 00:31:41,780 led to unexpected geometric sequencing. 869 00:31:41,780 --> 00:31:42,990 geometric sequencing. 870 00:31:42,990 --> 00:31:44,820 led to unexpected geometric sequencing. 871 00:31:44,820 --> 00:31:47,500 unexpected geometric sequencing. 872 00:31:49,450 --> 00:31:50,410 So we... don't know. 873 00:31:50,410 --> 00:31:52,920 So we don't know. 874 00:31:54,380 --> 00:31:55,540 So we don't know. 875 00:31:57,750 --> 00:31:58,880 And cut! 876 00:31:59,420 --> 00:32:00,380 That was great! 877 00:32:00,380 --> 00:32:00,840 Yeah? 878 00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:02,300 Yeah, that was definitely the one. 879 00:32:02,300 --> 00:32:03,550 Here, let me show you. 880 00:32:05,220 --> 00:32:05,890 Oh, shoot. 881 00:32:06,180 --> 00:32:06,550 What? 882 00:32:07,850 --> 00:32:09,010 I didn't hit record. 883 00:32:09,540 --> 00:32:11,910 [DUN DUN] 884 00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:17,230 [bathroom fan] 885 00:32:17,230 --> 00:32:18,940 In the audiobook production system, 886 00:32:18,940 --> 00:32:21,610 there are two equally valid approaches to narrating. 887 00:32:21,610 --> 00:32:23,070 Those that sit 888 00:32:23,070 --> 00:32:24,610 and those that stand 889 00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:26,610 [moaning] 890 00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:28,820 Her breasts heaved with excitement. 891 00:32:28,820 --> 00:32:39,000 [phone ringing] 892 00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:39,710 Hey, Mom. 893 00:32:40,170 --> 00:32:41,670 Happy birthday, honey. 894 00:32:42,300 --> 00:32:42,840 Thanks. 895 00:32:43,090 --> 00:32:44,590 Guess what I got you? 896 00:32:45,050 --> 00:32:45,930 What? 897 00:32:46,220 --> 00:32:48,100 A hemorrhoid pillow! 898 00:32:49,140 --> 00:32:50,260 But I don't have hemorrhoids. 899 00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:52,720 Yeah, but you sit all day. 900 00:32:53,270 --> 00:32:55,020 No, I stand actually. 901 00:32:55,390 --> 00:32:57,060 Well, I got it for you. 902 00:32:57,060 --> 00:32:58,440 It should arrive today. 903 00:32:58,440 --> 00:33:00,320 There's a little note for you too. 904 00:33:00,730 --> 00:33:01,360 Thanks? 905 00:33:02,190 --> 00:33:03,240 I gotta go. 906 00:33:03,240 --> 00:33:04,490 I got so much to record. 907 00:33:04,780 --> 00:33:05,700 Well... 908 00:33:05,700 --> 00:33:07,070 Call me this weekend. 909 00:33:07,070 --> 00:33:08,030 Okay. Bye. 910 00:33:09,240 --> 00:33:11,870 Larry is thinking about his neighbor, Jasalyn. 911 00:33:11,870 --> 00:33:14,330 He would like a second chance to make a first impression. 912 00:33:16,790 --> 00:33:17,580 What's this? 913 00:33:18,420 --> 00:33:20,250 A package with Jasalyn’s name. 914 00:33:20,670 --> 00:33:21,630 Should he deliver it? 915 00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:24,210 He would like to be a gentleman 916 00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:26,550 but he would also like to have dinner. 917 00:33:28,770 --> 00:33:35,060 [hopeful music] 918 00:33:35,060 --> 00:33:37,190 Today, he's going to be a gentleman. 919 00:33:38,150 --> 00:33:40,370 Today, this is his story. 920 00:33:40,970 --> 00:33:47,140 [triumphant music] 921 00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:48,540 [dog clicker] 922 00:33:49,490 --> 00:33:51,120 The espresso machine sputtered 923 00:33:51,120 --> 00:33:51,910 and burbled 924 00:33:52,030 --> 00:33:53,140 and shot its milky 925 00:33:53,140 --> 00:33:55,340 [doorbell] 926 00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:57,000 [dog clicker] 927 00:33:57,920 --> 00:33:59,670 The espresso machine sputtered 928 00:33:59,670 --> 00:34:00,420 and burbled 929 00:34:00,420 --> 00:34:01,380 and shot its 930 00:34:01,380 --> 00:34:03,380 [doorbell] 931 00:34:03,800 --> 00:34:04,820 [dog clicker] 932 00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:07,420 The espresso machine sputtered 933 00:34:07,420 --> 00:34:08,380 and burbled 934 00:34:08,380 --> 00:34:10,180 and shot its milky load. 935 00:34:10,180 --> 00:34:16,000 [doorbell] 936 00:34:18,170 --> 00:34:20,000 [door opening] 937 00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:21,810 Hi. 938 00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:23,440 Hi. 939 00:34:23,440 --> 00:34:25,070 I know we kind of got on the wrong foot 940 00:34:25,070 --> 00:34:27,740 and so I thought I should give you my number 941 00:34:27,740 --> 00:34:29,150 in case you're working and 942 00:34:29,150 --> 00:34:30,110 you need me to be quiet. 943 00:34:30,110 --> 00:34:32,490 Oh, that would be nice. Thanks. 944 00:34:33,370 --> 00:34:34,330 Here's my card. 945 00:34:34,740 --> 00:34:36,370 And just to show you I'm a gentleman, 946 00:34:36,370 --> 00:34:38,250 I saw you had this package downstairs 947 00:34:38,250 --> 00:34:39,250 so I brought it up. 948 00:34:39,250 --> 00:34:45,600 [hellfire music] 949 00:34:47,050 --> 00:34:47,970 That's not mine. 950 00:34:48,260 --> 00:34:49,260 It has your name on it. 951 00:34:50,220 --> 00:34:51,130 Must be - 952 00:34:51,130 --> 00:34:52,300 Oh, but there's a birthday card. 953 00:34:52,300 --> 00:34:53,220 Happy birthday Jaw 954 00:34:53,220 --> 00:34:54,680 this will keep your lady parts safe 955 00:34:54,680 --> 00:34:55,930 Love, Mom. 956 00:34:56,100 --> 00:34:58,600 There is a hemorrhoid cream too. 957 00:34:58,600 --> 00:35:00,230 You can use that with the pillow. 958 00:35:00,230 --> 00:35:04,400 [swanky music] 959 00:35:07,070 --> 00:35:08,650 Should I take it back downstairs? 960 00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:10,360 No, I'll take it. 961 00:35:10,780 --> 00:35:11,610 And you know what? 962 00:35:11,610 --> 00:35:13,410 if you really want to do something nice for me 963 00:35:13,410 --> 00:35:14,950 how about turning off your air mattress 964 00:35:14,950 --> 00:35:16,410 instead of bringing me my fucking mail? 965 00:35:16,830 --> 00:35:18,370 I knew it was you that called Mr. Patino. 966 00:35:18,370 --> 00:35:20,080 I knew it was you that mwah, mwah, mwah. 967 00:35:20,080 --> 00:35:21,710 If I don’t have the motor running, I have-- 968 00:35:23,330 --> 00:35:24,420 If I don't have the motor running 969 00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:26,670 I have to listen to you masturbate all night. 970 00:35:27,460 --> 00:35:27,880 What? 971 00:35:28,090 --> 00:35:28,630 What? 972 00:35:29,630 --> 00:35:31,510 Who masturbates all night? 973 00:35:31,510 --> 00:35:33,680 "Ee Jake, ah god, oh yes." 974 00:35:33,680 --> 00:35:34,300 Larry! 975 00:35:34,890 --> 00:35:36,430 I was recording an audiobook. 976 00:35:36,600 --> 00:35:36,890 What? 977 00:35:37,180 --> 00:35:38,770 I'm an audiobook narrator. 978 00:35:39,140 --> 00:35:39,980 What did you think? 979 00:35:39,980 --> 00:35:42,200 [orgasmic sound] 980 00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:44,080 [censored music] 981 00:35:45,650 --> 00:35:47,520 Well, I thought you were like a 982 00:35:48,710 --> 00:35:50,570 [censored music] 983 00:35:51,610 --> 00:35:53,990 You know, like a webcam girl. 984 00:35:55,530 --> 00:35:56,990 A webcam girl? 985 00:35:56,990 --> 00:35:58,950 Do I look like a webcam girl? 986 00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:01,000 Don't answer that. 987 00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:02,830 I don't know what that would look like. 988 00:36:03,120 --> 00:36:03,830 Oh, sure you don't. 989 00:36:05,630 --> 00:36:06,380 You were making a lot of 990 00:36:06,380 --> 00:36:07,170 interesting sounds 991 00:36:07,170 --> 00:36:07,920 for an audiobook. 992 00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:09,300 I record romance novels. 993 00:36:09,300 --> 00:36:10,420 And then your mom's note is 994 00:36:10,420 --> 00:36:11,590 talking about your lady parts. 995 00:36:11,590 --> 00:36:12,340 Jesus Christ. 996 00:36:12,340 --> 00:36:13,840 She's always trying to embarrass me. 997 00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:15,140 Well, how was I to know? 998 00:36:15,470 --> 00:36:16,890 You are a ridiculous person 999 00:36:16,890 --> 00:36:18,430 and you sleep on an air mattress. 1000 00:36:18,430 --> 00:36:19,470 I have a sleep disorder 1001 00:36:19,470 --> 00:36:19,770 Great 1002 00:36:19,770 --> 00:36:20,600 now the whole 1003 00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:21,810 apartment complex does too. 1004 00:36:21,810 --> 00:36:22,810 It’s not that loud. 1005 00:36:23,060 --> 00:36:24,440 You're a pain in the ass. 1006 00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:25,850 Well. 1007 00:36:26,400 --> 00:36:27,980 it's a good thing I brought up that hemorrhoid pillow. 1008 00:36:29,020 --> 00:36:30,970 [DUN DUN] 1009 00:36:31,110 --> 00:36:32,610 Jake grabbed her thick neck 1010 00:36:32,610 --> 00:36:34,150 and finally had his way with her. 1011 00:36:34,910 --> 00:36:37,070 She had resisted for so long 1012 00:36:37,070 --> 00:36:39,370 but he could feel her courage and desire. 1013 00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:41,290 So with a firm fist 1014 00:36:41,290 --> 00:36:48,110 [alarm] 1015 00:36:48,570 --> 00:36:51,910 [peeling sounds] 1016 00:36:54,370 --> 00:36:55,480 [door opening] 1017 00:36:56,600 --> 00:36:57,910 [door closing] 1018 00:36:59,740 --> 00:37:01,340 [sliding door] 1019 00:37:01,880 --> 00:37:02,650 [dog clicker] 1020 00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:04,730 So with a firm fist 1021 00:37:04,730 --> 00:37:06,520 he thrust his reins back 1022 00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:09,150 and the horse jumped over the first gate. 1023 00:37:09,150 --> 00:37:10,820 She flew higher than any thoroughbred 1024 00:37:10,820 --> 00:37:11,860 he had ever worked with. 1025 00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:13,900 The town cheered. 1026 00:37:13,900 --> 00:37:16,360 Katia and Tilly exchanged a look. 1027 00:37:16,360 --> 00:37:18,910 Their threesome would never be the same. 1028 00:37:19,620 --> 00:37:21,910 In the romance audiobook production system 1029 00:37:21,910 --> 00:37:23,580 there are two kinds of narrators. 1030 00:37:23,580 --> 00:37:25,460 Those that do character voices 1031 00:37:25,460 --> 00:37:26,330 and those that do not 1032 00:37:26,330 --> 00:37:27,750 do character voices. 1033 00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:29,170 These are their stories. 1034 00:37:29,960 --> 00:37:31,290 Hey Lady, you on your way? 1035 00:37:31,290 --> 00:37:32,670 Yep, I'm just taking 1036 00:37:32,670 --> 00:37:34,340 the last curler out. 1037 00:37:34,340 --> 00:37:34,720 Sweet. 1038 00:37:34,720 --> 00:37:36,550 I got a table in the back by the fire. 1039 00:37:36,550 --> 00:37:37,800 Hold on, I've got a -- 1040 00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:40,430 Jasalyn? 1041 00:37:40,430 --> 00:37:40,970 Ah, shit. 1042 00:37:40,970 --> 00:37:41,680 Hello? 1043 00:37:42,430 --> 00:37:43,220 Hellooooo? 1044 00:37:43,220 --> 00:37:44,180 Hey, Carly. 1045 00:37:44,180 --> 00:37:45,350 Sorry about that. I -- 1046 00:37:47,390 --> 00:37:48,100 Hold on. 1047 00:37:48,100 --> 00:37:53,420 [Facetime ringing] 1048 00:37:54,360 --> 00:37:55,190 Richard. 1049 00:37:55,990 --> 00:37:56,860 Jasalyn? 1050 00:37:57,240 --> 00:37:57,860 Wow. 1051 00:37:58,410 --> 00:37:59,570 You actually look nice. 1052 00:37:59,870 --> 00:38:01,200 Thanks, I was just going out. 1053 00:38:01,620 --> 00:38:02,160 What's up? 1054 00:38:02,330 --> 00:38:03,160 Good news! 1055 00:38:03,160 --> 00:38:04,240 Layla just emailed. 1056 00:38:04,700 --> 00:38:05,500 She wants to book us 1057 00:38:05,500 --> 00:38:06,500 for the rest of the series. 1058 00:38:06,500 --> 00:38:07,160 Yay! 1059 00:38:07,410 --> 00:38:07,960 Double Yay. 1060 00:38:08,210 --> 00:38:09,040 Two more books, 1061 00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:09,830 Maybe three. 1062 00:38:10,080 --> 00:38:12,040 She's not sure if it's a trilogy 1063 00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:12,920 or a four-ogy. 1064 00:38:13,460 --> 00:38:14,210 Four-ogy? 1065 00:38:14,920 --> 00:38:15,670 Quartet. 1066 00:38:16,380 --> 00:38:16,970 Whatever. 1067 00:38:17,420 --> 00:38:18,090 Well, I gotta say 1068 00:38:18,090 --> 00:38:19,840 I really loved your narration. 1069 00:38:20,890 --> 00:38:21,800 I know. 1070 00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:22,260 But... 1071 00:38:22,260 --> 00:38:23,970 you don't have to listen to my chapters. 1072 00:38:24,350 --> 00:38:25,390 I'm doing the proofing. 1073 00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:26,930 I know, I was listening 1074 00:38:26,930 --> 00:38:27,600 just in case you were 1075 00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:28,890 doing any character voices. 1076 00:38:29,690 --> 00:38:32,110 Yeah, I don't really do character voices. 1077 00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:34,020 They all pretty much sound like this. 1078 00:38:34,570 --> 00:38:35,320 Sexy. 1079 00:38:37,690 --> 00:38:39,320 Women are gonna swoon. 1080 00:38:39,530 --> 00:38:40,240 Oh man. 1081 00:38:40,660 --> 00:38:41,870 They'll do more than swoon 1082 00:38:41,870 --> 00:38:43,530 if you've read my reviews. 1083 00:38:43,530 --> 00:38:46,280 I'm so in love with this narrator 1084 00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:49,940 Richard has a voice that was meant for sex 1085 00:38:50,140 --> 00:38:53,620 Be forewarned, you might lose some panties over his voice. 1086 00:38:53,850 --> 00:38:55,500 Stock up now, ladies! 1087 00:38:55,500 --> 00:38:56,760 I was signing autographs once 1088 00:38:56,760 --> 00:38:58,090 at a romance convention 1089 00:38:58,090 --> 00:38:59,380 and you should've heard 1090 00:38:59,380 --> 00:39:00,840 what these women were saying. 1091 00:39:01,720 --> 00:39:02,970 None of them were my type. 1092 00:39:03,720 --> 00:39:05,140 Not anyone's type really. 1093 00:39:05,140 --> 00:39:06,140 Like... 1094 00:39:06,140 --> 00:39:07,810 eating bonbons in the basement 1095 00:39:07,810 --> 00:39:09,180 swipe left all day type. 1096 00:39:09,730 --> 00:39:10,060 But... 1097 00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:11,980 at least I can give them 1098 00:39:12,850 --> 00:39:14,220 This. 1099 00:39:15,370 --> 00:39:17,200 [silence] 1100 00:39:17,980 --> 00:39:20,110 So, you don't do voices? 1101 00:39:21,240 --> 00:39:22,280 When you have 1102 00:39:22,990 --> 00:39:23,740 "this" 1103 00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:25,780 you don't need to do voices. 1104 00:39:26,700 --> 00:39:28,620 Wait, do you do character voices? 1105 00:39:28,910 --> 00:39:31,410 Oh, yeah, but I like doing voices. 1106 00:39:31,830 --> 00:39:33,540 I have a Marilyn voice. 1107 00:39:33,830 --> 00:39:36,250 "Happy birthday Mr. President." 1108 00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:38,590 And I have an old lady voice, 1109 00:39:38,590 --> 00:39:41,050 "Well, hello there honey." 1110 00:39:41,050 --> 00:39:43,050 But if it's like a refined old lady 1111 00:39:43,050 --> 00:39:44,180 then I usually do 1112 00:39:44,180 --> 00:39:46,140 "Blanche from The Golden Girls." 1113 00:39:46,470 --> 00:39:47,890 Can you do a bunch of accents? 1114 00:39:47,890 --> 00:39:48,520 Yeah. 1115 00:39:49,100 --> 00:39:49,850 "I'll meet you around" 1116 00:39:49,850 --> 00:39:51,730 "the Blarney Stone for a pint." 1117 00:39:51,730 --> 00:39:53,190 "I think you bloody will" 1118 00:39:53,190 --> 00:39:54,440 "cuz I got good banter!" 1119 00:39:55,310 --> 00:39:57,940 "I'll gladly lift the iron curtain" 1120 00:39:58,570 --> 00:40:00,860 "if you drop the iron panties." 1121 00:40:02,650 --> 00:40:04,610 I actually had to read that in a book once. 1122 00:40:04,870 --> 00:40:06,950 One accent I can do really well 1123 00:40:06,950 --> 00:40:08,330 is a fat accent. 1124 00:40:10,910 --> 00:40:11,450 What? 1125 00:40:12,830 --> 00:40:15,040 I do a really good fat accent. 1126 00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:17,170 A what accent? 1127 00:40:18,090 --> 00:40:19,300 A fat 1128 00:40:19,300 --> 00:40:20,300 accent. 1129 00:40:21,130 --> 00:40:22,380 That's not an accent. 1130 00:40:22,380 --> 00:40:23,510 Oh, it's a bunch. 1131 00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:25,590 You've got your lippy fat accent. 1132 00:40:26,300 --> 00:40:29,220 "Bring me a bowl of buttered noodles." 1133 00:40:29,560 --> 00:40:31,850 You've got your jowly fat accent. 1134 00:40:32,390 --> 00:40:34,520 "I am not a crook." 1135 00:40:34,850 --> 00:40:37,690 You've got your droopy dog fat accent. 1136 00:40:37,980 --> 00:40:39,360 "You know what?" 1137 00:40:39,980 --> 00:40:41,860 "I'm happy." 1138 00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:43,320 And if all else fails 1139 00:40:43,320 --> 00:40:44,110 you got Chubs. 1140 00:40:44,450 --> 00:40:45,280 Chubs? 1141 00:40:45,570 --> 00:40:47,280 Yeah, from grade school. 1142 00:40:49,240 --> 00:40:51,490 My name is Chubs. 1143 00:40:51,870 --> 00:40:53,870 My Mom calls me Chubs. 1144 00:40:54,500 --> 00:40:56,580 My Dad calls me Chubs. 1145 00:40:57,460 --> 00:41:00,670 Even my dog calls me Chubs. 1146 00:41:00,880 --> 00:41:02,090 Chubs can you smile? 1147 00:41:02,510 --> 00:41:03,720 Sure, see? 1148 00:41:05,680 --> 00:41:07,930 Wow, that was like my whole childhood. 1149 00:41:08,010 --> 00:41:08,970 Yeah. 1150 00:41:08,970 --> 00:41:10,970 I figured you were a fat kid. 1151 00:41:13,810 --> 00:41:15,230 It went in waves. 1152 00:41:15,980 --> 00:41:16,770 Anyway. 1153 00:41:16,770 --> 00:41:17,690 I'm gonna need you to get 1154 00:41:17,690 --> 00:41:18,730 the rest of those chapters 1155 00:41:18,730 --> 00:41:19,900 to me by tomorrow morning 1156 00:41:20,230 --> 00:41:21,110 Tomorrow? 1157 00:41:21,110 --> 00:41:23,230 Layla wants to meet the holiday deadline. 1158 00:41:23,650 --> 00:41:24,280 Oh. 1159 00:41:24,900 --> 00:41:25,580 Uh... 1160 00:41:26,620 --> 00:41:28,650 [silence] 1161 00:41:29,160 --> 00:41:30,370 Yeah, I can do that. 1162 00:41:30,620 --> 00:41:31,080 Cool. 1163 00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:32,290 And can we set up the contract 1164 00:41:32,290 --> 00:41:32,950 the same way? 1165 00:41:32,950 --> 00:41:33,910 Where I do the proofing? 1166 00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:34,750 Sure. 1167 00:41:34,870 --> 00:41:36,210 I get a little extra money. 1168 00:41:36,210 --> 00:41:37,540 You do a little extra work. 1169 00:41:38,040 --> 00:41:40,710 Well, it's a lot of work, actually. 1170 00:41:41,170 --> 00:41:41,920 Proofing. 1171 00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:43,510 Oh, yeah. No, I know. 1172 00:41:43,840 --> 00:41:44,970 Okay, cool. 1173 00:41:44,970 --> 00:41:46,090 Well shoot me those chapters 1174 00:41:46,090 --> 00:41:46,800 when they're done 1175 00:41:46,800 --> 00:41:48,050 and I'll send you 1176 00:41:48,050 --> 00:41:49,590 the script for the next book. 1177 00:41:49,590 --> 00:41:50,720 Oh, and let me know 1178 00:41:50,720 --> 00:41:52,470 if you need any help with fat accents 1179 00:41:52,470 --> 00:41:53,850 because you always wanna be 1180 00:41:53,850 --> 00:41:54,770 body positive. 1181 00:41:55,310 --> 00:41:56,600 Especially for the women 1182 00:41:56,600 --> 00:41:58,270 that are listening to these books. 1183 00:41:58,270 --> 00:42:02,820 [laughter] 1184 00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:04,820 [chortle] 1185 00:42:07,530 --> 00:42:08,320 Tomorrow? 1186 00:42:08,320 --> 00:42:09,200 Oh shit. 1187 00:42:09,450 --> 00:42:10,240 Uh... 1188 00:42:10,240 --> 00:42:10,990 Carly? 1189 00:42:11,240 --> 00:42:11,990 FaceTime. 1190 00:42:11,990 --> 00:42:12,740 What? 1191 00:42:12,740 --> 00:42:15,880 [Facetime ringing] 1192 00:42:17,580 --> 00:42:18,040 Hi. 1193 00:42:18,290 --> 00:42:19,080 Hi. 1194 00:42:19,080 --> 00:42:20,040 What the fuck was that? 1195 00:42:20,250 --> 00:42:20,830 I know! 1196 00:42:20,830 --> 00:42:22,420 Things got kind of flirty, right? 1197 00:42:23,290 --> 00:42:24,000 Um... 1198 00:42:24,000 --> 00:42:26,260 I was definitely picking up on a vibe. 1199 00:42:26,670 --> 00:42:28,260 Do you think I should ask him out? 1200 00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:29,550 No. 1201 00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:31,340 He's never seen me dolled up like this. 1202 00:42:31,340 --> 00:42:32,550 Well good thing, 1203 00:42:32,550 --> 00:42:34,680 because that guy's a shallow prick. 1204 00:42:35,180 --> 00:42:36,350 He was just joking. 1205 00:42:36,350 --> 00:42:37,640 Yeah, real funny. 1206 00:42:38,100 --> 00:42:39,020 He just got caught up in me 1207 00:42:39,020 --> 00:42:41,020 doing the accents and voices. 1208 00:42:42,190 --> 00:42:43,060 You don't get it because 1209 00:42:43,060 --> 00:42:44,570 you don't really do voices. 1210 00:42:44,940 --> 00:42:46,150 I do voices. 1211 00:42:46,440 --> 00:42:47,490 You narrate nonfiction. 1212 00:42:48,110 --> 00:42:48,860 Fuck you. 1213 00:42:49,780 --> 00:42:51,240 I don't think Richard's a bad guy. 1214 00:42:51,240 --> 00:42:52,780 I like him, and... 1215 00:42:52,780 --> 00:42:54,450 you know we do sound good together. 1216 00:42:54,450 --> 00:42:56,450 You deserve so much better. 1217 00:42:57,500 --> 00:42:58,660 He's the kind of guy 1218 00:42:58,660 --> 00:42:59,790 who ranks women. 1219 00:43:00,790 --> 00:43:02,130 Yeah I know... 1220 00:43:02,420 --> 00:43:05,170 [de Bussy's Clair de lune] 1221 00:43:05,590 --> 00:43:07,510 I don't know. I just want someone. 1222 00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:10,050 Like, where's the guy that'll look at me 1223 00:43:10,050 --> 00:43:12,050 flaws and all 1224 00:43:12,050 --> 00:43:13,720 and I could be completely naked 1225 00:43:13,720 --> 00:43:15,100 and vulnerable 1226 00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:17,850 and he tells me I'm beautiful 1227 00:43:17,850 --> 00:43:19,730 and makes me really believe it. 1228 00:43:20,770 --> 00:43:23,400 Well, Richard is not that guy. 1229 00:43:24,110 --> 00:43:24,730 But 1230 00:43:24,730 --> 00:43:25,440 we might be able to 1231 00:43:25,440 --> 00:43:26,820 find you someone tonight. 1232 00:43:26,820 --> 00:43:28,150 Carly, I can't come out. 1233 00:43:28,150 --> 00:43:28,780 What? 1234 00:43:28,780 --> 00:43:29,740 Didn't you hear him? 1235 00:43:29,740 --> 00:43:31,200 I have to finish this book tonight. 1236 00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:32,200 Fine, finish the book 1237 00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:33,620 after you come out with me. 1238 00:43:33,820 --> 00:43:34,700 Sorry. 1239 00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:35,950 Rain check? 1240 00:43:36,660 --> 00:43:37,540 You're the worst. 1241 00:43:37,540 --> 00:43:38,950 And you're bending over backwards 1242 00:43:38,950 --> 00:43:40,330 for this douche bag. 1243 00:43:40,330 --> 00:43:41,960 Or should I say... 1244 00:43:43,170 --> 00:43:44,580 douchebag. 1245 00:43:45,460 --> 00:43:46,920 Hey, you can do voices. 1246 00:43:48,300 --> 00:43:49,800 [call ends] 1247 00:43:52,020 --> 00:44:04,140 [de Bussy's Clair de Lune] 1248 00:44:04,140 --> 00:44:06,140 [knives sharpening] 1249 00:44:06,140 --> 00:44:36,650 [hopeful music[ 1250 00:44:38,510 --> 00:44:42,140 [silence] 1251 00:44:43,340 --> 00:44:53,860 [de Bussy's Clair de Lune] 1252 00:44:53,860 --> 00:44:55,860 In the empanada production system 1253 00:44:55,860 --> 00:44:57,700 there are two types of ovens. 1254 00:44:57,700 --> 00:44:58,700 Those that work 1255 00:44:58,700 --> 00:45:00,030 and those that are broken. 1256 00:45:00,030 --> 00:45:12,600 [percussive music] 1257 00:45:15,050 --> 00:45:16,010 Hi. 1258 00:45:16,010 --> 00:45:17,640 This is gonna sound really weird 1259 00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:18,390 Weird like 1260 00:45:18,390 --> 00:45:20,140 thinking I'm a webcam girl weird? 1261 00:45:20,140 --> 00:45:21,310 Or weird like 1262 00:45:21,310 --> 00:45:22,430 sleeping on an air mattress 1263 00:45:22,430 --> 00:45:23,350 with the motor running weird? 1264 00:45:23,350 --> 00:45:24,230 I need to use your oven. 1265 00:45:24,230 --> 00:45:24,730 No. 1266 00:45:25,060 --> 00:45:25,940 Please it's my grandma's 1267 00:45:25,940 --> 00:45:26,310 No. 1268 00:45:26,310 --> 00:45:27,400 You can't be in my kitchen. 1269 00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:28,520 Call Mr. Patino. 1270 00:45:28,520 --> 00:45:29,230 I did call him, 1271 00:45:29,230 --> 00:45:30,050 I did 1272 00:45:31,770 --> 00:45:32,770 [door bell] 1273 00:45:34,860 --> 00:45:36,200 Larry, I have a deadline. 1274 00:45:36,200 --> 00:45:36,950 I can't. 1275 00:45:36,950 --> 00:45:37,910 Please I just need the oven 1276 00:45:37,910 --> 00:45:39,280 I have to finish book 1277 00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:39,780 tonight 1278 00:45:39,780 --> 00:45:40,780 This'll take like 20 minutes. 1279 00:45:40,780 --> 00:45:41,450 Tops. 1280 00:45:42,220 --> 00:45:44,770 [silence] 1281 00:45:45,500 --> 00:45:47,040 Is there any dairy in those? 1282 00:45:47,370 --> 00:45:48,420 No, just eggs. 1283 00:45:49,460 --> 00:45:50,040 Fine. 1284 00:45:50,040 --> 00:45:51,420 If you share some we have a deal. 1285 00:45:51,670 --> 00:45:52,420 How many? 1286 00:45:53,050 --> 00:45:54,420 I don't know, three? 1287 00:45:57,220 --> 00:45:57,680 Two. 1288 00:45:58,430 --> 00:45:59,430 Fine, two. 1289 00:45:59,430 --> 00:46:00,720 But you have to be quiet. 1290 00:46:01,010 --> 00:46:02,720 I'll be as quiet as a church mouse. 1291 00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:05,520 In the audiobook production system 1292 00:46:05,520 --> 00:46:07,060 there are those that punch and roll 1293 00:46:07,060 --> 00:46:08,230 and those that use a dog clicker 1294 00:46:08,230 --> 00:46:09,940 to show their recording mistakes. 1295 00:46:11,230 --> 00:46:13,190 Jasalyn is editing all her dog clicks. 1296 00:46:13,820 --> 00:46:15,490 She does not trust Barry... 1297 00:46:17,030 --> 00:46:18,200 She does not trust 1298 00:46:18,200 --> 00:46:19,820 'Larry' to be quiet. 1299 00:46:20,370 --> 00:46:21,370 If only a dog clicker 1300 00:46:21,370 --> 00:46:22,830 could be used in everyday life 1301 00:46:25,080 --> 00:46:25,870 or at least 1302 00:46:25,870 --> 00:46:26,910 on Larry. 1303 00:46:27,460 --> 00:46:28,960 Larry. What are you doing? 1304 00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:29,670 Are you kidding me 1305 00:46:29,670 --> 00:46:31,250 with how messy this kitchen is? 1306 00:46:31,420 --> 00:46:33,130 I was gonna clean this weekend. 1307 00:46:33,130 --> 00:46:34,670 How do you even eat in here? 1308 00:46:35,130 --> 00:46:37,420 Look buddy, you could wait for Mr. Patino. 1309 00:46:37,420 --> 00:46:38,590 No, I can't wait. 1310 00:46:39,130 --> 00:46:41,090 Then you're gonna have to deal with my messy kitchen. 1311 00:46:41,640 --> 00:46:43,510 No, I'm gonna clean this up. 1312 00:46:43,510 --> 00:46:44,430 No, you're not. 1313 00:46:44,430 --> 00:46:45,970 You're gonna put these pies in the oven 1314 00:46:45,970 --> 00:46:46,930 and get out of here. 1315 00:46:46,930 --> 00:46:48,520 This will take like 15 minutes. 1316 00:46:49,270 --> 00:46:49,890 You'd know that 1317 00:46:49,890 --> 00:46:51,150 if you cleaned from time to time. 1318 00:46:52,730 --> 00:46:54,230 Please, stop cleaning. 1319 00:46:55,900 --> 00:46:57,240 Just go do your recording. 1320 00:46:57,240 --> 00:46:59,450 I can't with you making noises. 1321 00:46:59,820 --> 00:47:01,160 That's not where that goes. 1322 00:47:01,530 --> 00:47:02,450 Under the sink. 1323 00:47:03,030 --> 00:47:03,660 Just... 1324 00:47:05,830 --> 00:47:06,910 Please move. 1325 00:47:09,790 --> 00:47:11,370 Oh, so you do know how to clean? 1326 00:47:11,710 --> 00:47:13,140 [bangs cutting board] 1327 00:47:15,090 --> 00:47:15,880 And why didn't you knock 1328 00:47:15,880 --> 00:47:17,420 on anybody else's door? 1329 00:47:17,420 --> 00:47:18,760 Well, I didn't want to deprive you 1330 00:47:18,760 --> 00:47:19,670 of seeing how good I am 1331 00:47:19,670 --> 00:47:20,470 with a scrubby. 1332 00:47:20,970 --> 00:47:24,310 [cleaning sounds] 1333 00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:26,720 How'd you learn how to make these? 1334 00:47:27,350 --> 00:47:27,970 My mom. 1335 00:47:28,350 --> 00:47:29,600 Old family recipe 1336 00:47:30,140 --> 00:47:31,190 They are beautiful. 1337 00:47:32,190 --> 00:47:33,560 Wait until you taste them. 1338 00:47:35,510 --> 00:47:36,820 [dish clink] 1339 00:47:37,320 --> 00:47:39,360 So you really thought I was a webcam girl? 1340 00:47:39,690 --> 00:47:40,400 Well, no. 1341 00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:41,780 first I thought you were a prostitute. 1342 00:47:44,450 --> 00:47:46,660 Well, when I heard the... 1343 00:47:47,490 --> 00:47:49,290 what I now know was a 1344 00:47:49,290 --> 00:47:51,660 dramatic reading of erotic fiction 1345 00:47:51,660 --> 00:47:53,460 but at the time I... 1346 00:47:55,250 --> 00:47:55,840 you know. 1347 00:47:56,130 --> 00:47:57,670 Girl's gotta make a living. 1348 00:47:59,590 --> 00:48:01,050 So they sounded real? 1349 00:48:01,550 --> 00:48:02,550 The orgasms? 1350 00:48:03,300 --> 00:48:04,590 Oh, um... 1351 00:48:05,820 --> 00:48:09,810 A, E, I, O, U - 1352 00:48:09,810 --> 00:48:10,220 Yeah. 1353 00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:11,710 Yeah. 1354 00:48:14,230 --> 00:48:15,270 Why so dressed up? 1355 00:48:15,610 --> 00:48:16,770 I thought you got to 1356 00:48:16,770 --> 00:48:17,940 work in your pajamas. 1357 00:48:19,820 --> 00:48:21,070 I was supposed to go out 1358 00:48:21,070 --> 00:48:22,280 to celebrate my birthday 1359 00:48:22,280 --> 00:48:24,070 but my book deadline got moved up. 1360 00:48:24,070 --> 00:48:24,700 So... 1361 00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:26,070 Here we are. 1362 00:48:26,370 --> 00:48:27,580 Oh, well you... 1363 00:48:30,160 --> 00:48:31,000 You look nice. 1364 00:48:32,960 --> 00:48:34,080 Happy birthday, by the way. 1365 00:48:34,080 --> 00:48:35,830 Sorry about the deadline. 1366 00:48:37,290 --> 00:48:38,090 It's fine. 1367 00:48:39,420 --> 00:48:40,460 Well, thanks again. 1368 00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:41,840 You're a life saver. 1369 00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:44,510 My grandma's turning 90 and I 1370 00:48:44,510 --> 00:48:45,800 promised her I'd make these. 1371 00:48:46,470 --> 00:48:47,430 They're her favorite. 1372 00:48:47,760 --> 00:48:48,930 Well, we don't want another 1373 00:48:48,930 --> 00:48:50,640 birthday girl disappointed. 1374 00:48:50,640 --> 00:48:53,020 Let's get those empanadas in the oven and 1375 00:48:53,980 --> 00:48:55,350 I'll get back to recording. 1376 00:48:55,350 --> 00:48:56,690 Okay, I'll show myself out. 1377 00:48:57,060 --> 00:48:57,900 Make sure you're quiet 1378 00:48:57,900 --> 00:48:59,020 when you're coming and going. 1379 00:48:59,360 --> 00:49:00,150 Will do. 1380 00:49:01,530 --> 00:49:02,940 And don't use the alarm. 1381 00:49:02,940 --> 00:49:04,240 It's super loud. 1382 00:49:04,860 --> 00:49:05,530 Got it. 1383 00:49:07,820 --> 00:49:09,140 [oven clattering] 1384 00:49:11,850 --> 00:49:14,110 [muffled dog clicker] 1385 00:49:14,870 --> 00:49:16,750 Jake pulled me close to him 1386 00:49:16,750 --> 00:49:19,130 and there was a moment I thought he might get angry. 1387 00:49:19,460 --> 00:49:20,500 But then 1388 00:49:20,500 --> 00:49:21,420 he smiled. 1389 00:49:21,840 --> 00:49:25,590 I could feel butterflies in my stomach at the thought of winning Jake's heart. 1390 00:49:26,260 --> 00:49:30,010 I stared at myself in the mirror making sure that this was not a dream. 1391 00:49:31,140 --> 00:49:33,310 The image looking back at me was striking. 1392 00:49:34,020 --> 00:49:35,310 I looked like a princess 1393 00:49:35,810 --> 00:49:38,100 and I enjoyed the feeling of being desired. 1394 00:49:38,600 --> 00:49:39,940 My mind went to Jake. 1395 00:49:41,150 --> 00:49:43,530 His face at seeing me enter this evening. 1396 00:49:44,440 --> 00:49:45,650 With a wolfish gaze 1397 00:49:45,650 --> 00:49:48,320 and a sheepish smile he said, 1398 00:49:48,320 --> 00:49:51,330 "Darling, how do you clean up." 1399 00:49:51,330 --> 00:49:54,540 "I have to admit that dress is much better in blue." 1400 00:49:55,120 --> 00:49:57,710 "Imagery is what fuels the imagination. 1401 00:49:58,330 --> 00:50:00,170 and imagination, my dear, 1402 00:50:00,170 --> 00:50:01,840 is best expressed 1403 00:50:01,840 --> 00:50:02,840 in the bedroom." 1404 00:50:03,500 --> 00:50:06,300 "I would have loved to wear a low-cut dress tonight... 1405 00:50:06,920 --> 00:50:10,970 ...but unfortunately the bite marks and bruises could not be shown." 1406 00:50:10,970 --> 00:50:11,600 "Bite marks?" 1407 00:50:11,930 --> 00:50:13,060 "Oh, you don't know? 1408 00:50:13,560 --> 00:50:15,430 Jake may be all decorum in court 1409 00:50:16,100 --> 00:50:18,310 but in the bedroom he follows no rules." 1410 00:50:18,940 --> 00:50:22,850 [burning] 1411 00:50:23,020 --> 00:50:25,030 Katia felt the corset loosening. 1412 00:50:25,690 --> 00:50:26,530 She gasped. 1413 00:50:26,530 --> 00:50:30,360 [fire alarm] 1414 00:50:30,360 --> 00:50:30,990 Larry! 1415 00:50:30,990 --> 00:50:35,330 [fire alarm] 1416 00:50:35,330 --> 00:50:36,370 No, no no! 1417 00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:39,750 Oh, my grandma's going to kill me! 1418 00:50:42,740 --> 00:50:46,050 [building fire alarm] 1419 00:50:46,050 --> 00:50:47,170 Hey, you um... 1420 00:50:47,670 --> 00:50:48,670 You want an empanada? 1421 00:50:49,260 --> 00:50:50,640 You can have more than two. 1422 00:50:50,640 --> 00:50:52,050 You can have as many as you want. 1423 00:50:52,640 --> 00:50:54,140 They're a little crispy, but um... 1424 00:50:54,600 --> 00:50:55,430 they're still good. 1425 00:50:55,820 --> 00:50:58,850 [building alarm] 1426 00:50:59,270 --> 00:51:00,060 All right. 1427 00:51:00,480 --> 00:51:12,510 [building alarm] 1428 00:51:13,110 --> 00:51:16,480 [coughs] 1429 00:51:17,080 --> 00:51:17,870 This is... 1430 00:51:18,370 --> 00:51:19,080 ...spicy! 1431 00:51:20,540 --> 00:51:20,920 Yeah. 1432 00:51:22,290 --> 00:51:23,960 Yeah, Grandma likes 'em spicy. 1433 00:51:24,340 --> 00:51:25,670 Spice is really good for your throat. 1434 00:51:25,670 --> 00:51:26,710 That'll be helpful for narrating. 1435 00:51:26,710 --> 00:51:27,590 Real helpful. 1436 00:51:28,010 --> 00:51:30,300 You know what's not good for narrating? 1437 00:51:30,800 --> 00:51:31,220 What? 1438 00:51:31,430 --> 00:51:32,720 A fire alarm. 1439 00:51:34,010 --> 00:51:34,470 Oh. 1440 00:51:35,470 --> 00:51:36,760 Yeah, sorry about that. 1441 00:51:39,140 --> 00:51:41,190 This has been "Hung like a Horse." 1442 00:51:41,480 --> 00:51:43,020 The Jake Morgan series. 1443 00:51:43,400 --> 00:51:44,730 written by Layla James 1444 00:51:45,060 --> 00:51:46,900 and narrated by Richard Benson 1445 00:51:47,020 --> 00:51:48,280 and Jasalyn Frank. 1446 00:51:48,780 --> 00:51:51,950 Hey Richard, here is the last file. 1447 00:51:52,320 --> 00:51:54,030 This book was a lot of fun. 1448 00:51:54,490 --> 00:51:55,740 Thank you so much for doing 1449 00:51:55,740 --> 00:51:57,290 the final proofing. 1450 00:51:58,240 --> 00:52:00,120 Looking forward to starting the next one 1451 00:52:00,410 --> 00:52:00,960 Thanks, 1452 00:52:01,710 --> 00:52:02,420 Jasalyn. 1453 00:52:05,000 --> 00:52:12,850 [suspenseful music] 1454 00:52:14,400 --> 00:52:18,000 [puttering] 1455 00:52:18,910 --> 00:52:20,000 [cupboard door] 1456 00:52:20,450 --> 00:52:24,000 [pouring wine] 1457 00:52:24,340 --> 00:52:26,910 [puttering] 1458 00:52:27,310 --> 00:52:28,510 [tablet unlock] 1459 00:52:29,020 --> 00:52:33,940 [scrolling] 1460 00:52:35,370 --> 00:52:56,340 [romance movie music] 1461 00:52:56,340 --> 00:52:59,250 I love working with you. 1462 00:53:00,110 --> 00:53:05,250 [romantic music] 1463 00:53:06,570 --> 00:53:08,220 [keyboard] 1464 00:53:08,980 --> 00:53:09,980 Warmly, 1465 00:53:10,220 --> 00:53:11,140 Jasalyn 1466 00:53:12,110 --> 00:53:14,050 [keyboard] 1467 00:53:14,490 --> 00:53:15,280 Thanks. 1468 00:53:16,340 --> 00:53:18,680 [romantic music] 1469 00:53:19,770 --> 00:53:21,080 [keyboard] 1470 00:53:21,410 --> 00:53:23,790 It's great working with you. 1471 00:53:24,740 --> 00:53:26,340 [keyboard]a 1472 00:53:28,050 --> 00:53:30,220 [keyboard] 1473 00:53:30,880 --> 00:53:32,920 Hey handsome. 1474 00:53:33,760 --> 00:53:37,510 Hopefully the author thinks we kept it sexy. 1475 00:53:37,970 --> 00:53:39,720 Yours, Jasalyn. 1476 00:53:39,720 --> 00:53:43,820 [romantic music] 1477 00:53:43,820 --> 00:53:46,000 [keyboard] 1478 00:53:46,440 --> 00:53:48,230 Hey, Richard. 1479 00:53:50,050 --> 00:53:56,110 [keyboard and mouse sounds] 1480 00:53:56,110 --> 00:53:56,950 Thanks. 1481 00:53:59,340 --> 00:54:07,820 [suspenseful music] 1482 00:54:09,820 --> 00:54:12,570 [puttering] 1483 00:54:13,310 --> 00:54:17,650 [pouring wine] 1484 00:54:18,680 --> 00:54:20,470 Tossing and turning 1485 00:54:21,350 --> 00:54:24,060 I had felt haunted by regret. 1486 00:54:24,060 --> 00:54:26,140 and dreamt of a life with a woman 1487 00:54:26,140 --> 00:54:27,730 that was not meant for me. 1488 00:54:30,060 --> 00:54:31,480 Then suddenly 1489 00:54:31,480 --> 00:54:34,110 I was back in that row of horses. 1490 00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:36,650 There she was 1491 00:54:36,650 --> 00:54:39,820 holding her torn dress at the stall 1492 00:54:39,820 --> 00:54:42,320 staring at me with those doe eyes. 1493 00:54:43,490 --> 00:54:45,290 I walked over to her 1494 00:54:45,290 --> 00:54:46,910 lifting her chin 1495 00:54:46,910 --> 00:54:50,290 and began wiping her tears one by one. 1496 00:54:52,590 --> 00:54:53,590 I kissed her 1497 00:54:55,130 --> 00:54:56,760 and then looked at her. 1498 00:54:58,340 --> 00:55:06,510 [soft music] 1499 00:55:07,940 --> 00:55:10,480 [ethereal music] 1500 00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:11,310 Hi Richard, 1501 00:55:11,810 --> 00:55:13,020 I know this is weird 1502 00:55:13,020 --> 00:55:15,440 leaving a personal message on the recording. 1503 00:55:16,110 --> 00:55:18,400 I figured you would catch it in the proofing. 1504 00:55:19,780 --> 00:55:22,110 I just wanted to say that, 1505 00:55:23,030 --> 00:55:24,580 you're an amazing narrator 1506 00:55:24,580 --> 00:55:26,660 and I'm so glad we got to work together. 1507 00:55:26,660 --> 00:56:12,960 [dreamy music] 1508 00:56:12,960 --> 00:56:14,040 Hi Richard! 1509 00:56:14,380 --> 00:56:15,580 Did you get the file? 1510 00:56:15,960 --> 00:56:17,710 Yeah, uh... 1511 00:56:18,380 --> 00:56:20,460 I just got an email from Layla 1512 00:56:20,460 --> 00:56:21,590 saying that you left some 1513 00:56:21,590 --> 00:56:23,880 weird message at the end of the last chapter. 1514 00:56:25,640 --> 00:56:26,640 What? 1515 00:56:26,800 --> 00:56:27,760 Did you like, 1516 00:56:27,760 --> 00:56:29,560 record something extra? 1517 00:56:30,060 --> 00:56:30,890 Uh... 1518 00:56:31,430 --> 00:56:32,310 extra? 1519 00:56:33,060 --> 00:56:34,810 Well... didn't you listen to the file? 1520 00:56:35,060 --> 00:56:36,940 Well, I looked at the file but-- 1521 00:56:37,190 --> 00:56:38,690 you know, you got it to me so late 1522 00:56:38,690 --> 00:56:40,320 I figured I could take a gamble 1523 00:56:40,320 --> 00:56:41,690 on the last chapter. 1524 00:56:41,690 --> 00:56:42,700 So you didn't proof it? 1525 00:56:42,700 --> 00:56:43,900 You just sent it to her? 1526 00:56:43,900 --> 00:56:45,700 You got it to me at 1 am. 1527 00:56:45,990 --> 00:56:47,160 So you had all morning. 1528 00:56:47,160 --> 00:56:49,290 Well, I looked at the wave files. 1529 00:56:49,290 --> 00:56:50,450 They looked fine. 1530 00:56:50,950 --> 00:56:51,660 Um. 1531 00:56:52,620 --> 00:56:53,330 Well. 1532 00:56:53,750 --> 00:56:54,750 What did you do? 1533 00:56:54,750 --> 00:56:57,080 Like, change the ending of her book? 1534 00:56:58,090 --> 00:56:59,420 Last night I was... 1535 00:56:59,420 --> 00:57:00,300 ...really... 1536 00:57:01,380 --> 00:57:02,380 ...tired. 1537 00:57:02,380 --> 00:57:03,130 And... 1538 00:57:03,630 --> 00:57:06,470 I know I recorded the whole chapter. 1539 00:57:06,640 --> 00:57:07,260 But... 1540 00:57:07,970 --> 00:57:09,390 I may have... 1541 00:57:10,010 --> 00:57:10,810 uh... 1542 00:57:11,640 --> 00:57:12,890 What did you do? 1543 00:57:12,890 --> 00:57:17,900 [ethereal music] 1544 00:57:17,900 --> 00:57:19,360 Well, when I recording 1545 00:57:19,360 --> 00:57:21,820 I'm expecting that you'll listen to it 1546 00:57:21,820 --> 00:57:23,780 so the author gets a finished product. 1547 00:57:23,780 --> 00:57:26,030 Yeah, but the last chapter? 1548 00:57:26,490 --> 00:57:28,320 I mean, who cares with this kind of writing? 1549 00:57:28,320 --> 00:57:29,410 It's such smut. 1550 00:57:29,910 --> 00:57:31,580 And you're usually a professional. 1551 00:57:31,740 --> 00:57:32,540 Well I thought 1552 00:57:32,540 --> 00:57:33,790 you were a professional too. 1553 00:57:33,790 --> 00:57:35,080 You didn't do your job. 1554 00:57:36,170 --> 00:57:38,290 You gotta fix the chapter 1555 00:57:38,290 --> 00:57:40,790 and send it to her with an apology. 1556 00:57:40,960 --> 00:57:42,500 So now I'm doing your work? 1557 00:57:42,880 --> 00:57:45,010 You want me to edit the last chapter 1558 00:57:45,010 --> 00:57:46,380 which you're getting paid to do. 1559 00:57:47,800 --> 00:57:48,510 Fine. 1560 00:57:49,470 --> 00:57:50,390 I'll fix it. 1561 00:57:50,890 --> 00:57:51,350 Uh... 1562 00:57:51,470 --> 00:57:53,020 No, no-no, wait, no. 1563 00:57:53,430 --> 00:57:54,850 Don't listen to it. 1564 00:57:54,850 --> 00:57:56,480 Yeah, don't worry about it. 1565 00:57:57,770 --> 00:57:59,440 Thanks so much for calling. 1566 00:58:00,230 --> 00:58:01,110 Don't listen to it. 1567 00:58:01,110 --> 00:58:01,940 Definitely don't listen. 1568 00:58:01,940 --> 00:58:02,780 I'll fix it. 1569 00:58:04,280 --> 00:58:04,990 But for the record 1570 00:58:04,990 --> 00:58:06,450 aren't you getting paid extra 1571 00:58:06,450 --> 00:58:07,530 for doing the proofing? 1572 00:58:07,700 --> 00:58:08,240 So what 1573 00:58:08,240 --> 00:58:09,450 you want me to pay you? 1574 00:58:09,780 --> 00:58:11,580 Well if I'm doing your work. 1575 00:58:12,530 --> 00:58:13,160 You know what? 1576 00:58:13,990 --> 00:58:14,540 Never mind. 1577 00:58:14,870 --> 00:58:15,290 Wait! 1578 00:58:15,290 --> 00:58:15,870 Thanks for nothing. 1579 00:58:18,450 --> 00:58:21,020 [gasps] 1580 00:58:22,740 --> 00:58:24,960 [touching tablet] 1581 00:58:24,960 --> 00:58:26,840 Your voice is so... 1582 00:58:28,720 --> 00:58:31,050 I mean what can I say but sexy? 1583 00:58:31,680 --> 00:58:32,640 And sometimes? 1584 00:58:33,260 --> 00:58:34,680 I like to imagine us 1585 00:58:34,680 --> 00:58:36,350 reading together in the same booth. 1586 00:58:37,140 --> 00:58:39,520 Did I just say that out loud? 1587 00:58:40,690 --> 00:58:42,770 Anyway, wish we could record together. 1588 00:58:43,360 --> 00:58:45,150 Especially some of those hot sex scenes. 1589 00:58:47,110 --> 00:58:48,200 I gotta be honest. 1590 00:58:48,820 --> 00:58:49,990 I've been wanting to ask you out 1591 00:58:49,990 --> 00:58:51,990 ever since we started this series. 1592 00:58:52,700 --> 00:58:53,240 So... 1593 00:58:53,990 --> 00:58:55,040 here I am 1594 00:58:55,410 --> 00:58:56,540 taking a 1595 00:58:56,540 --> 00:58:58,540 big courageous step in 1596 00:58:58,540 --> 00:58:59,830 making that happen. 1597 00:59:00,210 --> 00:59:01,920 I hope you like women who are fierce 1598 00:59:01,920 --> 00:59:03,090 and up front. 1599 00:59:03,710 --> 00:59:05,250 Call me if you'd like to meet in person 1600 00:59:05,250 --> 00:59:06,550 and we could grab a drink 1601 00:59:07,010 --> 00:59:08,050 talk shop. 1602 00:59:08,380 --> 00:59:09,760 First round is on me. 1603 00:59:12,340 --> 00:59:34,850 [battle drums] 1604 00:59:36,510 --> 00:59:38,000 [chime] 1605 00:59:39,420 --> 00:59:41,140 [whooshes] 1606 00:59:43,250 --> 00:59:45,880 Richard! You handsome devil. 1607 00:59:45,880 --> 00:59:50,590 Layla, you look wonderful! 1608 00:59:50,590 --> 00:59:52,010 Gosh. 1609 00:59:52,010 --> 00:59:53,390 How long has it been 1610 00:59:53,390 --> 00:59:54,970 since we've seen each other? 1611 00:59:54,970 --> 00:59:57,850 I think it was the romance convention. 1612 00:59:58,270 --> 00:59:59,180 It's all been emails. 1613 00:59:59,180 --> 01:00:01,940 Oh my, how the readers -- 1614 01:00:01,940 --> 01:00:04,560 Richard doesn't proof the chapters. 1615 01:00:06,360 --> 01:00:07,520 Yes... 1616 01:00:08,530 --> 01:00:09,740 I got your email. 1617 01:00:09,860 --> 01:00:11,610 You emailed her about me? 1618 01:00:11,950 --> 01:00:13,360 Of course I emailed her. 1619 01:00:13,700 --> 01:00:14,870 You see, Layla? 1620 01:00:14,870 --> 01:00:17,410 This is exactly what I'm talking about. 1621 01:00:17,410 --> 01:00:19,240 She's totally unprofessional. 1622 01:00:20,040 --> 01:00:22,790 Yes, I got your email, too. 1623 01:00:23,120 --> 01:00:24,960 You emailed her about me? 1624 01:00:25,750 --> 01:00:26,840 So here we are. 1625 01:00:27,250 --> 01:00:29,050 Two men enter, one man leaves? 1626 01:00:29,050 --> 01:00:30,420 Is that how you want it? 1627 01:00:30,760 --> 01:00:33,510 Look, I am really sorry about the... 1628 01:00:34,130 --> 01:00:35,720 ...the last chapter's message. 1629 01:00:35,800 --> 01:00:37,550 Apologies are nice 1630 01:00:37,550 --> 01:00:38,560 but unfortunately 1631 01:00:38,560 --> 01:00:40,270 they can't turn back the clock 1632 01:00:40,270 --> 01:00:41,810 and this whole little mix up 1633 01:00:41,810 --> 01:00:44,140 has caused quite a delay. 1634 01:00:44,140 --> 01:00:44,770 Well... 1635 01:00:45,400 --> 01:00:46,480 I don't feel comfortable 1636 01:00:46,480 --> 01:00:47,520 working with her. 1637 01:00:47,520 --> 01:00:48,690 Well, I don't trust you. 1638 01:00:48,690 --> 01:00:49,820 You don't do the proofing. 1639 01:00:49,820 --> 01:00:51,110 How did you want me to 1640 01:00:51,110 --> 01:00:52,740 to proof your ad-libs? 1641 01:00:52,740 --> 01:00:53,860 It wasn't an ad-lib 1642 01:00:53,860 --> 01:00:55,660 and I definitely regret it now. 1643 01:00:55,660 --> 01:00:57,830 Oh, really? You don't wanna... 1644 01:00:57,830 --> 01:00:58,990 record in the same 1645 01:00:58,990 --> 01:01:00,540 booth with me anymore? 1646 01:01:02,040 --> 01:01:03,790 I was drunk when I said that. 1647 01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:06,500 Wow a real professional. 1648 01:01:07,080 --> 01:01:08,170 I must've been drunk 1649 01:01:08,170 --> 01:01:09,460 when I offered you this book. 1650 01:01:09,590 --> 01:01:11,260 Well, you were definitely sober 1651 01:01:11,260 --> 01:01:11,760 when you said it 1652 01:01:11,760 --> 01:01:12,920 doesn't matter if you proof 1653 01:01:12,920 --> 01:01:13,760 when the writing is such 1654 01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:16,720 When the writing is such brilliance! 1655 01:01:16,720 --> 01:01:17,260 Yes! 1656 01:01:17,800 --> 01:01:19,180 You should be thanking me 1657 01:01:19,180 --> 01:01:20,220 for introducing you to 1658 01:01:20,220 --> 01:01:22,140 a writer of this caliber. 1659 01:01:22,140 --> 01:01:23,140 Yes. 1660 01:01:23,140 --> 01:01:24,140 Thank you so much 1661 01:01:24,140 --> 01:01:25,190 for getting me this book. 1662 01:01:25,190 --> 01:01:27,020 I am so grateful. 1663 01:01:27,020 --> 01:01:28,440 Just like how you described 1664 01:01:28,440 --> 01:01:30,360 all the women at the convention. 1665 01:01:30,360 --> 01:01:32,360 So grateful for an autograph. 1666 01:01:33,110 --> 01:01:34,650 Why don't I tell Layla 1667 01:01:34,650 --> 01:01:36,490 all the wonderful things you said 1668 01:01:36,490 --> 01:01:37,870 about our listeners? 1669 01:01:37,870 --> 01:01:39,700 What wonderful things? 1670 01:01:39,950 --> 01:01:40,530 Oh, 1671 01:01:40,530 --> 01:01:41,620 like how they're all 1672 01:01:41,620 --> 01:01:42,700 nasty bonbon eating 1673 01:01:42,700 --> 01:01:43,500 basement dwellers 1674 01:01:43,500 --> 01:01:44,500 who can't get dates. 1675 01:01:46,170 --> 01:01:47,000 I don't even know 1676 01:01:47,000 --> 01:01:48,500 what you're talking about. 1677 01:01:48,500 --> 01:01:50,130 He was making fun of the listeners. 1678 01:01:50,130 --> 01:01:51,800 I would never! 1679 01:01:52,090 --> 01:01:53,800 You are being so gross. 1680 01:01:54,340 --> 01:01:55,590 My friend heard you-- 1681 01:01:55,590 --> 01:01:57,300 Oh, your friend? 1682 01:01:57,300 --> 01:01:58,220 In your closet? 1683 01:01:58,220 --> 01:02:00,180 Where you work by yourself all day? 1684 01:02:00,970 --> 01:02:02,220 Now I know you're crazy. 1685 01:02:02,220 --> 01:02:04,640 I am not crazy, you -- 1686 01:02:04,640 --> 01:02:05,850 you gas lighter! 1687 01:02:05,850 --> 01:02:07,440 I will call her right now! 1688 01:02:07,440 --> 01:02:08,100 Okay! 1689 01:02:08,440 --> 01:02:10,020 We have gotten off track 1690 01:02:10,020 --> 01:02:12,360 and we don't have time for this. 1691 01:02:12,360 --> 01:02:12,980 I know. 1692 01:02:13,320 --> 01:02:14,860 All because of her delays. 1693 01:02:15,280 --> 01:02:16,360 Well the fact that we're even 1694 01:02:16,360 --> 01:02:17,530 having this zoom call 1695 01:02:17,530 --> 01:02:18,700 speaks to the fact that 1696 01:02:18,700 --> 01:02:20,410 you're both unprofessional. 1697 01:02:20,870 --> 01:02:23,080 I want this series completed 1698 01:02:23,080 --> 01:02:23,950 by the holidays. 1699 01:02:23,950 --> 01:02:25,580 I would love 1700 01:02:25,580 --> 01:02:26,250 to finish 1701 01:02:26,250 --> 01:02:27,750 and keep working with you. 1702 01:02:27,750 --> 01:02:28,920 I am ready to 1703 01:02:28,920 --> 01:02:30,920 replace her and move on. 1704 01:02:31,130 --> 01:02:32,960 Okay, the listeners want 1705 01:02:32,960 --> 01:02:34,960 consistent narrators, so 1706 01:02:35,510 --> 01:02:37,510 how can we make this work 1707 01:02:37,510 --> 01:02:38,760 between the two of you? 1708 01:02:38,760 --> 01:02:39,340 Well. 1709 01:02:39,930 --> 01:02:41,600 I think we should split the proofing. 1710 01:02:41,600 --> 01:02:42,470 and 1711 01:02:42,470 --> 01:02:43,640 I get paid for half 1712 01:02:43,640 --> 01:02:44,970 in addition to my narrating. 1713 01:02:45,390 --> 01:02:47,890 I am an "offer only" narrator 1714 01:02:47,890 --> 01:02:50,060 and you can't change my offer 1715 01:02:50,060 --> 01:02:50,980 mid-book. 1716 01:02:51,150 --> 01:02:52,860 If you have other offers 1717 01:02:52,860 --> 01:02:53,980 I understand. 1718 01:02:54,820 --> 01:02:56,360 I would like to move forward 1719 01:02:56,360 --> 01:02:57,650 with the next book 1720 01:02:57,650 --> 01:02:59,740 and I do want to keep 1721 01:02:59,740 --> 01:03:01,410 the narrators consistent. 1722 01:03:04,330 --> 01:03:05,040 It's fine. 1723 01:03:05,040 --> 01:03:06,450 We're almost done with this book. 1724 01:03:06,950 --> 01:03:08,460 We can keep the contract the same. 1725 01:03:08,460 --> 01:03:10,540 I'll proof my chapters. 1726 01:03:10,540 --> 01:03:11,830 But the next book 1727 01:03:11,830 --> 01:03:13,290 we are paid equally. 1728 01:03:13,630 --> 01:03:15,000 That seems more than fair. 1729 01:03:16,210 --> 01:03:16,760 Richard? 1730 01:03:17,820 --> 01:03:20,110 [silence] 1731 01:03:21,010 --> 01:03:21,760 So it's settled. 1732 01:03:22,390 --> 01:03:22,930 Perfect! 1733 01:03:23,470 --> 01:03:24,810 I have a few recording 1734 01:03:24,810 --> 01:03:25,560 pickup notes 1735 01:03:25,560 --> 01:03:27,020 that I am sending right now. 1736 01:03:27,770 --> 01:03:29,100 Please try and finish them 1737 01:03:29,100 --> 01:03:30,810 ASAP as possible. 1738 01:03:30,890 --> 01:03:32,440 Are we still on for 1739 01:03:32,440 --> 01:03:33,730 next year's convention? 1740 01:03:35,110 --> 01:03:37,610 I'll have to think about that. 1741 01:03:37,610 --> 01:03:39,150 I wouldn't want to force you 1742 01:03:39,150 --> 01:03:41,070 to be around any bonbon eaters. 1743 01:03:41,070 --> 01:03:42,450 Oh, it's no big deal at all. 1744 01:03:44,160 --> 01:03:45,370 Bye Richard. 1745 01:03:47,200 --> 01:03:49,830 Listen, he is not worth another thought. 1746 01:03:49,830 --> 01:03:51,040 Trust me. 1747 01:03:51,040 --> 01:03:52,620 You open your heart like that 1748 01:03:52,620 --> 01:03:54,250 and this is how he treats you? 1749 01:03:55,710 --> 01:03:57,670 Yeah, it's... 1750 01:03:57,670 --> 01:03:58,920 pretty embarrassing 1751 01:03:59,670 --> 01:04:00,840 I think I'm brainwashed 1752 01:04:00,840 --> 01:04:02,300 from all these romance novels. 1753 01:04:02,300 --> 01:04:03,260 Hey. 1754 01:04:03,260 --> 01:04:04,390 I was tickled 1755 01:04:04,390 --> 01:04:05,300 that I got to hear your 1756 01:04:05,300 --> 01:04:06,560 little afterword to him. 1757 01:04:06,810 --> 01:04:08,560 I mean you can't write romance novels 1758 01:04:08,560 --> 01:04:10,850 and not be a complete romantic. 1759 01:04:11,690 --> 01:04:12,690 And I know 1760 01:04:12,690 --> 01:04:14,020 you'll get these pickups 1761 01:04:14,020 --> 01:04:15,150 right away 1762 01:04:15,150 --> 01:04:16,320 because I think 1763 01:04:16,320 --> 01:04:17,520 you've learned your lesson. 1764 01:04:17,650 --> 01:04:19,610 Yes, I have and I will. 1765 01:04:19,860 --> 01:04:21,360 I will get them done by tonight. 1766 01:04:22,360 --> 01:04:23,570 How about this afternoon? 1767 01:04:24,870 --> 01:04:25,320 Sure. 1768 01:04:25,740 --> 01:04:26,660 There's only a few. 1769 01:04:27,450 --> 01:04:28,870 I'll head right into the booth. 1770 01:04:29,160 --> 01:04:29,950 Perfect. 1771 01:04:29,950 --> 01:04:31,000 Let's say noon then? 1772 01:04:31,830 --> 01:04:32,710 Noon it is. 1773 01:04:32,710 --> 01:04:34,740 [DUN DUN] 1774 01:04:34,740 --> 01:04:35,940 [whoosh] 1775 01:04:37,020 --> 01:04:39,600 [sighs of relief] 1776 01:04:41,820 --> 01:04:45,310 [sniffs] 1777 01:04:47,110 --> 01:05:17,050 [frenzied music] 1778 01:05:19,040 --> 01:05:20,420 Pick ups for HUNG LIKE A HORSE: 1779 01:05:20,840 --> 01:05:21,760 Correction one. 1780 01:05:22,920 --> 01:05:24,590 Her moist lips quivered. 1781 01:05:24,590 --> 01:05:26,680 She was wetter than a snowman in Arizona. 1782 01:05:26,680 --> 01:05:28,600 Her breasts heaved with excitement. 1783 01:05:28,600 --> 01:05:30,100 The rhythm of his thrusts 1784 01:05:30,100 --> 01:05:31,770 took Katia over the edge. 1785 01:05:32,390 --> 01:05:34,020 Her thighs squeezed the leather. 1786 01:05:34,020 --> 01:05:35,940 Jake's pants became too tight. 1787 01:05:35,940 --> 01:05:37,100 The tea kettle spurted. 1788 01:05:37,100 --> 01:05:38,360 Eee, eee, eee! 1789 01:05:38,360 --> 01:05:40,110 A volcano erupted. 1790 01:05:40,110 --> 01:05:41,820 Like frosting from the tip. 1791 01:05:42,800 --> 01:05:43,260 Hah! 1792 01:05:44,540 --> 01:05:50,490 [rattling door] 1793 01:05:50,490 --> 01:05:52,290 In the audiobook production system 1794 01:05:52,290 --> 01:05:54,040 there are two types of narrators 1795 01:05:54,040 --> 01:05:56,040 those that can get out of their booths 1796 01:05:56,040 --> 01:05:57,210 and those that cannot. 1797 01:05:58,460 --> 01:05:59,790 Oh god, I'm trapped. 1798 01:06:00,200 --> 01:06:01,790 [DUN DUN] 1799 01:06:03,110 --> 01:06:13,810 [phone ringing] 1800 01:06:13,810 --> 01:06:14,430 Hello. 1801 01:06:14,430 --> 01:06:16,690 No one is available to take your call 1802 01:06:17,520 --> 01:06:18,560 Hi Mr. Patino, 1803 01:06:18,560 --> 01:06:19,810 This is Jasalyn. 1804 01:06:20,190 --> 01:06:21,900 and I am 1805 01:06:22,320 --> 01:06:23,360 stuck my closet. 1806 01:06:23,360 --> 01:06:24,280 And... 1807 01:06:24,280 --> 01:06:26,320 you're probably gonna get this message... 1808 01:06:26,320 --> 01:06:27,450 and I'll be dead. 1809 01:06:27,900 --> 01:06:29,820 The coroner will have already arrived, 1810 01:06:29,820 --> 01:06:31,240 'cuz you never pick up the phone. 1811 01:06:31,240 --> 01:06:32,240 So, bye! 1812 01:06:33,170 --> 01:06:34,240 [sigh] 1813 01:06:36,370 --> 01:06:36,870 Larry... 1814 01:06:38,790 --> 01:06:39,500 Larry! 1815 01:06:40,250 --> 01:06:46,770 [excited breathing] 1816 01:06:46,770 --> 01:06:47,800 [Facetime ringing] 1817 01:06:48,080 --> 01:06:49,050 [Facetime failed] 1818 01:06:49,740 --> 01:06:51,680 [banging] 1819 01:06:51,680 --> 01:06:52,390 Larry! 1820 01:06:53,010 --> 01:06:53,720 Larry! 1821 01:06:54,930 --> 01:06:55,850 Larry! 1822 01:06:55,850 --> 01:06:57,480 God you're always there. 1823 01:06:58,020 --> 01:06:58,640 Larry! 1824 01:06:59,230 --> 01:06:59,980 It's Jasalyn! 1825 01:06:59,980 --> 01:07:01,310 Larry, I need you! 1826 01:07:01,650 --> 01:07:02,400 Larry! 1827 01:07:04,070 --> 01:07:05,230 God where could he be? 1828 01:07:05,620 --> 01:07:16,870 [cheerful music] 1829 01:07:16,870 --> 01:07:18,000 Wait, you're trapped in your closet? 1830 01:07:18,160 --> 01:07:19,210 How'd you get trapped in your closet? 1831 01:07:19,210 --> 01:07:19,830 I don't know! 1832 01:07:19,830 --> 01:07:21,040 The door won't open. 1833 01:07:21,500 --> 01:07:22,830 Can you come out here or not? 1834 01:07:22,830 --> 01:07:23,500 Oh man Jaw 1835 01:07:23,500 --> 01:07:24,460 I wish I could help you. 1836 01:07:24,460 --> 01:07:25,460 but I got called in 1837 01:07:25,460 --> 01:07:26,840 to read or that Clooney project. 1838 01:07:27,710 --> 01:07:28,760 That's amazing. 1839 01:07:28,760 --> 01:07:29,340 I know. 1840 01:07:29,340 --> 01:07:31,050 Fingers crossed it goes well. 1841 01:07:31,050 --> 01:07:32,680 Oh my gosh, break a leg! 1842 01:07:32,680 --> 01:07:33,140 Okay. 1843 01:07:33,140 --> 01:07:34,930 Call me this evening if you're still stuck. 1844 01:07:34,930 --> 01:07:35,720 Okay, will do. 1845 01:07:35,930 --> 01:07:36,890 Okay. Bye. 1846 01:07:37,340 --> 01:07:42,280 [Old Hollywood music] 1847 01:07:43,020 --> 01:07:45,140 [phone ringing] 1848 01:07:45,400 --> 01:07:46,610 Oh, hello! 1849 01:07:46,610 --> 01:07:47,280 Hi, Patty-- 1850 01:07:47,280 --> 01:07:48,570 You've reached the voicemail 1851 01:07:48,570 --> 01:07:49,900 of Patty Haddad 1852 01:07:49,900 --> 01:07:51,110 vocal coach. 1853 01:07:51,110 --> 01:07:53,280 For emergency dialect coaching 1854 01:07:53,490 --> 01:07:55,030 please listen to the following 1855 01:07:55,620 --> 01:07:56,580 Please listen to the 1856 01:07:56,580 --> 01:07:57,990 Are you kidding me? 1857 01:07:57,990 --> 01:07:59,750 For standard British, 1858 01:07:59,750 --> 01:08:00,410 please proceed 1859 01:08:00,410 --> 01:08:01,120 by pressing the 1860 01:08:01,120 --> 01:08:03,380 first button on your telephone receiver. 1861 01:08:03,750 --> 01:08:05,670 For that soft 1862 01:08:05,670 --> 01:08:06,920 sultry 1863 01:08:07,170 --> 01:08:08,630 Southern accent 1864 01:08:09,090 --> 01:08:11,680 Go on now and press two y'all. 1865 01:08:11,680 --> 01:08:12,300 What do I press 1866 01:08:12,300 --> 01:08:13,800 if I'm stuck in my closet, Patty? 1867 01:08:13,800 --> 01:08:16,300 Oh, you got a problem with your New York accent, huh? 1868 01:08:16,300 --> 01:08:17,180 Oh, Jesus Christ. 1869 01:08:17,180 --> 01:08:18,600 That'd be three. 1870 01:08:18,600 --> 01:08:19,560 Oh gosh. 1871 01:08:19,560 --> 01:08:21,060 Don't tell me you're having trouble 1872 01:08:21,060 --> 01:08:22,640 with a Midwest accent. 1873 01:08:22,640 --> 01:08:23,520 Oh boy. 1874 01:08:23,810 --> 01:08:25,520 I guess you better try four 1875 01:08:27,320 --> 01:08:29,070 The mailbox is full. 1876 01:08:29,610 --> 01:08:32,530 Oh, that mailbox is all full now 1877 01:08:32,900 --> 01:08:35,660 Oh, someone's gotta take out the trash. 1878 01:08:35,660 --> 01:08:36,780 This is full! 1879 01:08:37,240 --> 01:08:37,990 Oh gosh 1880 01:08:38,240 --> 01:08:39,830 This mailbox is full too. 1881 01:08:40,120 --> 01:08:41,160 Bye now. 1882 01:08:41,820 --> 01:08:44,200 [call dropping] 1883 01:08:46,820 --> 01:09:04,110 [military drums] 1884 01:09:06,770 --> 01:09:07,650 [door rattle] 1885 01:09:08,400 --> 01:09:10,540 [foot pounding] 1886 01:09:11,280 --> 01:09:12,540 Ugh! 1887 01:09:13,070 --> 01:09:14,400 Help! 1888 01:09:14,940 --> 01:09:24,370 [villanous music] 1889 01:09:24,370 --> 01:09:34,450 [Facetime ringing] 1890 01:09:35,300 --> 01:09:35,840 What? 1891 01:09:36,090 --> 01:09:37,010 Hi Richard. 1892 01:09:37,430 --> 01:09:38,010 So... 1893 01:09:38,300 --> 01:09:39,510 funny story... 1894 01:09:40,220 --> 01:09:41,390 I'm gonna be a little delayed 1895 01:09:41,390 --> 01:09:42,310 with those 1896 01:09:42,310 --> 01:09:43,200 pickups. 1897 01:09:45,270 --> 01:09:46,730 Are you wearing a towel? 1898 01:09:47,270 --> 01:09:48,360 Yeah, I just 1899 01:09:48,360 --> 01:09:49,230 jumped into my booth 1900 01:09:49,230 --> 01:09:51,730 to do one last edit after my shower 1901 01:09:51,730 --> 01:09:53,570 the door got stuck or something. 1902 01:09:53,570 --> 01:09:54,190 I'm trapped. 1903 01:09:54,740 --> 01:09:56,910 But can you tell Layla it's coming? 1904 01:09:56,910 --> 01:09:57,490 Oh. 1905 01:09:58,200 --> 01:09:59,200 I'll tell Layla. 1906 01:09:59,620 --> 01:10:00,740 I'll tell her what a 1907 01:10:01,450 --> 01:10:03,330 solid professional you are. 1908 01:10:03,540 --> 01:10:04,040 No. 1909 01:10:04,500 --> 01:10:05,500 Just give me her number. 1910 01:10:05,500 --> 01:10:06,120 I'll call her. 1911 01:10:06,120 --> 01:10:07,500 Why don't you just FaceTime her? 1912 01:10:07,500 --> 01:10:08,880 She can see you recording naked. 1913 01:10:08,880 --> 01:10:09,630 It's perfect. 1914 01:10:09,630 --> 01:10:10,250 Fuck you. 1915 01:10:10,250 --> 01:10:11,960 No, you're fucked. 1916 01:10:14,130 --> 01:10:15,260 You don't have anyone that 1917 01:10:15,260 --> 01:10:16,470 can let you out of your closet. 1918 01:10:16,760 --> 01:10:17,590 Yeah, I do. 1919 01:10:18,760 --> 01:10:19,430 Uh-huh. 1920 01:10:19,800 --> 01:10:20,970 I got loads of people. 1921 01:10:21,760 --> 01:10:22,260 Uh-huh. 1922 01:10:22,430 --> 01:10:23,470 I'll figure it out. 1923 01:10:23,470 --> 01:10:23,970 Well, 1924 01:10:24,680 --> 01:10:26,310 you better figure it out soon. 1925 01:10:27,270 --> 01:10:28,060 Asshole! 1926 01:10:28,650 --> 01:10:36,000 [music] 1927 01:10:36,480 --> 01:10:39,940 ♫ I don't want to be a loser ♫ 1928 01:10:39,940 --> 01:10:43,570 ♫ Trick my heart but I know better ♫ 1929 01:10:44,110 --> 01:10:46,540 ♫ Trick my heart but I know better ♫a 1930 01:10:46,540 --> 01:10:48,940 ♫ than to be maneuvered ♫ 1931 01:10:48,940 --> 01:10:51,210 ♫ let you ditch me when you're done ♫ 1932 01:10:51,210 --> 01:10:52,000 Oh Mom 1933 01:10:52,000 --> 01:10:54,170 I made such an ass of myself. 1934 01:10:54,170 --> 01:10:55,260 Ohhh 1935 01:10:55,260 --> 01:10:56,420 What happened, honey? 1936 01:10:56,420 --> 01:10:58,650 Oh God, it's such a long story. 1937 01:10:59,620 --> 01:11:02,880 [Fumbling with keys] 1938 01:11:03,850 --> 01:11:05,060 It's okay, honey. 1939 01:11:05,770 --> 01:11:06,270 Oh! 1940 01:11:06,270 --> 01:11:08,350 My upstairs neighbor just got home. 1941 01:11:08,810 --> 01:11:10,060 He can get me out of here. 1942 01:11:10,270 --> 01:11:11,730 Someone finally moved in? 1943 01:11:11,730 --> 01:11:12,690 Is he nice? 1944 01:11:12,900 --> 01:11:13,650 No. 1945 01:11:14,150 --> 01:11:15,190 But I gotta go. 1946 01:11:15,190 --> 01:11:16,150 Love you, bye. 1947 01:11:16,540 --> 01:11:27,830 [phone ringing] 1948 01:11:27,830 --> 01:11:28,830 Jasalyn, hi. 1949 01:11:29,370 --> 01:11:30,960 Hey Larry, so 1950 01:11:31,290 --> 01:11:32,500 I'm having an emergency 1951 01:11:32,500 --> 01:11:33,710 and I called Mr. Patino 1952 01:11:33,710 --> 01:11:35,250 and of course no answer 1953 01:11:35,250 --> 01:11:35,750 So 1954 01:11:35,750 --> 01:11:37,460 I was wondering if you could help me. 1955 01:11:39,760 --> 01:11:40,760 Are you naked? 1956 01:11:41,380 --> 01:11:42,800 I'm in my recording booth 1957 01:11:42,800 --> 01:11:43,970 and the door won't open. 1958 01:11:44,220 --> 01:11:44,680 Huh. 1959 01:11:45,010 --> 01:11:46,600 Are you sure you're not a webcam girl? 1960 01:11:46,810 --> 01:11:47,810 Can you come down here? 1961 01:11:47,810 --> 01:11:48,850 There's a key under the mat. 1962 01:11:49,140 --> 01:11:49,810 Uh sure. 1963 01:11:49,810 --> 01:11:50,940 I'll be right down. 1964 01:11:51,110 --> 01:11:52,650 [call end boop] 1965 01:11:54,650 --> 01:11:59,220 [water pipes] 1966 01:11:59,220 --> 01:12:04,410 [phone ringing] 1967 01:12:04,410 --> 01:12:06,030 Larry I can hear the water running. 1968 01:12:06,030 --> 01:12:06,950 This is an emergency. 1969 01:12:06,950 --> 01:12:07,990 I need you right now! 1970 01:12:07,990 --> 01:12:09,330 I just got back from biking 1971 01:12:09,330 --> 01:12:10,290 and I smell. 1972 01:12:10,290 --> 01:12:10,910 Who cares? 1973 01:12:10,910 --> 01:12:11,920 Just come help me. 1974 01:12:11,920 --> 01:12:13,210 Okay, I'll be right down. 1975 01:12:14,040 --> 01:12:15,960 In the audiobook production system 1976 01:12:15,960 --> 01:12:16,840 there are two separate 1977 01:12:16,840 --> 01:12:18,300 but equally important groups. 1978 01:12:18,630 --> 01:12:20,220 those that are stuck in their booths 1979 01:12:20,630 --> 01:12:21,510 and those 1980 01:12:21,510 --> 01:12:22,720 that can rescue them. 1981 01:12:22,720 --> 01:12:23,220 Hello? 1982 01:12:23,220 --> 01:12:24,840 Oh Larry, I'm in here. 1983 01:12:27,510 --> 01:12:28,720 Where are you? 1984 01:12:28,720 --> 01:12:30,140 You know I'm in the closet. 1985 01:12:30,140 --> 01:12:31,020 Stop joking. 1986 01:12:32,850 --> 01:12:33,390 Where? 1987 01:12:34,440 --> 01:12:35,690 Larry this isn't funny. 1988 01:12:36,060 --> 01:12:37,070 Well, it's a little funny. 1989 01:12:37,270 --> 01:12:39,150 Come on, stop fucking around just 1990 01:12:39,150 --> 01:12:40,280 get me out of here. 1991 01:12:40,280 --> 01:12:41,690 Okay, there's a 1992 01:12:41,690 --> 01:12:42,650 looks like there's a 1993 01:12:42,650 --> 01:12:43,700 a rod 1994 01:12:43,700 --> 01:12:44,910 stuck in the track 1995 01:12:45,240 --> 01:12:46,530 Will you stop pushing the door? 1996 01:12:46,910 --> 01:12:47,910 Then open it. 1997 01:12:48,030 --> 01:12:49,740 I can't because you're pushing. 1998 01:12:50,750 --> 01:12:51,580 Stop pushing! 1999 01:12:51,580 --> 01:12:53,500 When I get out of here 2000 01:12:53,500 --> 01:12:54,910 Oh! 2001 01:12:56,250 --> 01:13:11,450 [romantic music] 2002 01:13:12,910 --> 01:13:13,480 [gasp] 2003 01:13:14,600 --> 01:13:15,450 Oh! 2004 01:13:18,220 --> 01:13:30,370 [hesitant music] 2005 01:13:30,370 --> 01:13:31,540 Here's your towel. 2006 01:13:31,820 --> 01:13:34,540 [hesitant music] 2007 01:13:34,830 --> 01:13:36,510 Thank you. 2008 01:13:36,680 --> 01:13:39,570 [hesitant music] 2009 01:13:39,850 --> 01:13:40,800 I um... 2010 01:13:43,550 --> 01:13:45,220 I didn't see anything. 2011 01:13:45,450 --> 01:13:48,740 [hesitant music] 2012 01:13:48,970 --> 01:13:51,080 If I did see anything, it was beautiful. 2013 01:13:51,310 --> 01:13:55,280 [hesitant music[ 2014 01:13:55,730 --> 01:13:56,810 I'll just uh... 2015 01:13:58,860 --> 01:14:00,060 I'll just show myself out. 2016 01:14:00,440 --> 01:14:01,230 Okay. 2017 01:14:01,230 --> 01:14:01,900 Thanks. 2018 01:14:02,610 --> 01:14:03,320 Bye. 2019 01:14:04,770 --> 01:14:06,510 [footsteps] 2020 01:14:07,140 --> 01:14:10,030 [dramatic music] 2021 01:14:10,030 --> 01:14:11,620 Jasalyn was stunned. 2022 01:14:12,910 --> 01:14:13,790 Could it be? 2023 01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:15,110 [front door closes] 2024 01:14:17,500 --> 01:14:19,080 She felt a warmth in her belly. 2025 01:14:21,250 --> 01:14:22,750 A quicker in her thighs. 2026 01:14:24,130 --> 01:14:25,670 Her heart racing and sweat 2027 01:14:25,670 --> 01:14:27,680 dripping down between her breasts. 2028 01:14:28,380 --> 01:14:29,930 She had never in all her life 2029 01:14:29,930 --> 01:14:31,850 in all her most erotic fantasies 2030 01:14:32,390 --> 01:14:33,720 never had she imagined 2031 01:14:33,720 --> 01:14:35,350 she could ever feel as much passion 2032 01:14:35,350 --> 01:14:36,560 as she felt in this 2033 01:14:38,350 --> 01:14:39,980 I don't know how to read this stuff. 2034 01:14:41,940 --> 01:14:42,520 I know. 2035 01:14:42,980 --> 01:14:44,360 I make it look easy. 2036 01:14:46,340 --> 01:14:48,110 [DUN DUN] 2037 01:14:49,340 --> 01:15:13,540 [narrator hums] 2038 01:15:16,520 --> 01:15:17,180 Uh, yes. 2039 01:15:17,180 --> 01:15:18,560 Yes, it is uh... 2040 01:15:18,560 --> 01:15:20,230 it is quite true what you've heard. 2041 01:15:20,230 --> 01:15:21,520 I am, uh 2042 01:15:21,520 --> 01:15:22,690 I am hung 2043 01:15:22,690 --> 01:15:23,730 like a horse. 2044 01:15:23,980 --> 01:15:25,780 Oh quit going on about your penis! 2045 01:15:25,780 --> 01:15:27,190 We all know you're only doing it 2046 01:15:27,190 --> 01:15:28,150 to forget about the fact 2047 01:15:28,150 --> 01:15:29,650 they took both your testicles. 2048 01:15:29,900 --> 01:15:31,200 Oh, but they took yours too. 2049 01:15:31,200 --> 01:15:32,120 Don't tell them that! 2050 01:15:34,120 --> 01:15:35,030 It is true, though. 2051 01:15:35,580 --> 01:15:36,490 They took them both.