1
00:00:00,934 --> 00:00:02,102
- Hey, y'all.
I'm Ms. Pat.
2
00:00:02,102 --> 00:00:03,370
- All rise.
3
00:00:03,370 --> 00:00:04,771
- And I know the inside
of a courtroom.
4
00:00:04,771 --> 00:00:07,207
I'm a convicted felon
with a GED.
5
00:00:07,207 --> 00:00:09,509
Now I'm sitting on this side
of the bench.
6
00:00:09,509 --> 00:00:11,277
Y'all are killing me.
7
00:00:11,277 --> 00:00:13,747
These are real cases
with real money on the line,
8
00:00:13,747 --> 00:00:16,649
and I'm bringing my own friends
to court as my jury.
9
00:00:16,649 --> 00:00:17,884
- What is this, "Looney Tunes"?
10
00:00:17,884 --> 00:00:19,252
- Y'all may have started
this mess,
11
00:00:19,252 --> 00:00:20,587
but I'm gonna settle it.
12
00:00:20,587 --> 00:00:22,555
- I love this courtroom!
13
00:00:22,555 --> 00:00:23,757
[laughter]
14
00:00:23,757 --> 00:00:25,992
- All rise 'cause
court is back in session.
15
00:00:25,992 --> 00:00:29,562
[dramatic music]
16
00:00:29,562 --> 00:00:32,165
- In this courtroom,
the statute of limitations
17
00:00:32,165 --> 00:00:35,168
sets in when this judge has
had enough of your bullshit.
18
00:00:35,168 --> 00:00:38,738
All rise for the impatient
Ms. Pat.
19
00:00:38,738 --> 00:00:43,009
♪ ♪
20
00:00:43,009 --> 00:00:44,878
- Thank you.
Please have a seat.
21
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:46,279
How y'all doing today, jury?
- Great.
22
00:00:46,279 --> 00:00:47,614
- Doing fantastic.
23
00:00:47,614 --> 00:00:49,416
- Thank you, Ms. Pat.
- You all right, Bailiff?
24
00:00:49,416 --> 00:00:51,084
- It's date night tonight.
I got to get out of here.
25
00:00:51,084 --> 00:00:52,552
[laughter]
26
00:00:52,552 --> 00:00:54,320
- Let's get to bailiffing then
since you got a hot date.
27
00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:58,458
- This is the case of
Shareef versus Shareef.
28
00:00:58,458 --> 00:00:59,993
You may now enter.
29
00:00:59,993 --> 00:01:02,462
- Plaintiff Zakeemah Shareef
is suing her brother
30
00:01:02,462 --> 00:01:05,732
for $5,000 after she says
he borrowed her car,
31
00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:08,368
then totaled it
while she was out of town.
32
00:01:08,368 --> 00:01:09,969
- Go on with your bad self.
33
00:01:09,969 --> 00:01:12,939
- Defendant Rashad Shareef
says the brakes on the car
34
00:01:12,939 --> 00:01:15,675
were busted,
but Sis never let him know.
35
00:01:15,675 --> 00:01:18,511
He's lucky to be alive,
and there's no way
36
00:01:18,511 --> 00:01:20,480
he's responsible
for the wreck.
37
00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:21,915
- So help you God?
- I do.
38
00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:23,483
- I do.
39
00:01:23,483 --> 00:01:24,851
- Well, before we get started,
I just want to let you know,
40
00:01:24,851 --> 00:01:26,386
this is a jury of my peers.
41
00:01:26,386 --> 00:01:27,821
They are only here for me,
and if you piss them off,
42
00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:29,088
they will meet you outside.
43
00:01:29,088 --> 00:01:32,125
[laughter]
44
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:35,795
So can you tell me
why we're here today please?
45
00:01:35,795 --> 00:01:38,765
- I came here today to sue my
brother for $5,000 because
46
00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:41,134
when I was in Disney World,
having fun with my son,
47
00:01:41,134 --> 00:01:42,802
he wrecked my vehicle.
48
00:01:42,802 --> 00:01:44,671
He was supposed to drive
from home to work,
49
00:01:44,671 --> 00:01:46,005
but he took my car
somewhere else
50
00:01:46,005 --> 00:01:48,041
without my permission,
without me knowing,
51
00:01:48,041 --> 00:01:50,310
and then I received the call
that my car was totaled.
52
00:01:50,310 --> 00:01:51,945
- Rashad, you want to tell me
what happened?
53
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,179
- Yes, Your Honor.
54
00:01:53,179 --> 00:01:54,781
She did give me permission
to drive the car
55
00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:56,950
from home and to work.
56
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,818
But she called me one morning
57
00:01:58,818 --> 00:02:00,753
telling me to go
pick my brother up.
58
00:02:00,753 --> 00:02:02,789
And I don't know, I think
she's forgetting that part
59
00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,290
where she did that.
60
00:02:04,290 --> 00:02:06,326
It was a rainy day, and we
were in stop-and-go traffic
61
00:02:06,326 --> 00:02:07,694
going up a hill.
62
00:02:07,694 --> 00:02:08,995
The other car stopped
in front of me,
63
00:02:08,995 --> 00:02:11,030
and I was pressing
on the brakes--
64
00:02:11,030 --> 00:02:13,533
like, stomping on the brakes,
and they weren't going.
65
00:02:13,533 --> 00:02:15,668
And we just slammed
into the back...
66
00:02:15,668 --> 00:02:16,836
- Now, does that
make sense to you?
67
00:02:16,836 --> 00:02:17,770
- Right in the car
in front of us.
68
00:02:17,770 --> 00:02:19,038
- Ms. Pat, come on now.
69
00:02:19,038 --> 00:02:20,173
- Rashad,
on a scale of one to ten,
70
00:02:20,173 --> 00:02:22,475
how bad were these brakes?
- 15.
71
00:02:22,475 --> 00:02:24,310
- You a damn liar.
15 who?
72
00:02:24,310 --> 00:02:25,445
- 15.
73
00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:27,046
- What kind of car
did you have?
74
00:02:27,046 --> 00:02:28,948
- I had a brand-new,
off the lot,
75
00:02:28,948 --> 00:02:31,017
white 2017 Chevy Trax.
76
00:02:31,017 --> 00:02:33,286
- Why y'all calling
a 2017 brand-new?
77
00:02:33,286 --> 00:02:34,621
- That's what I'm saying.
78
00:02:34,621 --> 00:02:38,324
- Listen, baby, that car
at least in junior high.
79
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:41,327
[laughter]
80
00:02:42,529 --> 00:02:44,063
How would you say
your brother driving?
81
00:02:44,063 --> 00:02:45,365
- My brother is
a reckless driver.
82
00:02:45,365 --> 00:02:47,100
He crashed my mama car.
He's--
83
00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:48,167
- Your Honor, I have to object.
84
00:02:48,167 --> 00:02:49,435
- He don't have
his own vehicle.
85
00:02:49,435 --> 00:02:51,204
- And you let him use your car?
86
00:02:51,204 --> 00:02:53,072
[laughter]
87
00:02:53,072 --> 00:02:54,874
- So do you have
any photos of your car?
88
00:02:54,874 --> 00:02:56,209
- Yes, ma'am, I do.
89
00:02:56,209 --> 00:02:57,944
I have all the evidence
you need right here.
90
00:02:57,944 --> 00:03:00,280
Exhibit A.
91
00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:01,548
- Oh, wow.
92
00:03:01,548 --> 00:03:03,850
- He made your car
look like a shark.
93
00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:05,518
[laughter]
94
00:03:05,518 --> 00:03:06,553
- She didn't even get
her plates yet.
95
00:03:06,553 --> 00:03:07,720
Look at that.
96
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:08,922
Still got the CarMax
on the front.
97
00:03:08,922 --> 00:03:11,291
[laughter]
98
00:03:11,291 --> 00:03:12,692
- Rashad, who was
in the car with you?
99
00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:14,627
- My brother.
- What's your brother name?
100
00:03:14,627 --> 00:03:16,763
- Hajid.
- Hygiene?
101
00:03:16,763 --> 00:03:19,065
- We call him Prince.
- Come on up here, Hijinks.
102
00:03:19,065 --> 00:03:20,533
[laughter]
103
00:03:20,533 --> 00:03:21,734
- Please have a seat
right up here.
104
00:03:21,734 --> 00:03:23,269
Come on.
105
00:03:23,269 --> 00:03:25,371
- Get on the winning team, boy.
- State your full name.
106
00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:26,639
- Prince Ali.
107
00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:29,976
- You ain't Aladdin.
108
00:03:29,976 --> 00:03:33,046
[laughter]
109
00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:35,381
Boy, sit your ass down.
110
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:36,516
[laughter]
111
00:03:36,516 --> 00:03:37,850
What is your government name?
112
00:03:37,850 --> 00:03:40,286
You in court.
- Hajid Shareef.
113
00:03:40,286 --> 00:03:41,688
- And what is your
relationship to them?
114
00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:43,256
- They're my brother
and my sister.
115
00:03:43,256 --> 00:03:44,757
[laughs]
116
00:03:44,757 --> 00:03:47,794
[laughter]
117
00:03:50,763 --> 00:03:53,199
- Was you in the car
when the accident happened?
118
00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:54,867
- Yeah, I was in the car,
most definitely.
119
00:03:54,867 --> 00:03:57,136
- Do you think it was his fault
when he had the wreck?
120
00:03:57,136 --> 00:03:58,671
- Oh, mos def.
- What?
121
00:03:58,671 --> 00:04:00,273
- Oh!
122
00:04:00,273 --> 00:04:01,774
- Well, actually--
actually-- actually,
123
00:04:01,774 --> 00:04:03,476
Your Honor, to be real,
to be honest-- 'cause I swore.
124
00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:04,844
You know what I'm saying?
125
00:04:04,844 --> 00:04:06,846
So I say it's really--
you know what I'm saying?
126
00:04:06,846 --> 00:04:08,881
That's a tough question.
127
00:04:08,881 --> 00:04:11,918
[laughter]
128
00:04:16,189 --> 00:04:18,091
- Did it seem like
the brakes didn't work?
129
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:19,525
- I'm not gonna lie.
130
00:04:19,525 --> 00:04:21,361
For the majority of that trip,
the brakes was being
131
00:04:21,361 --> 00:04:23,396
pretty smooth, from my telling.
- Mm.
132
00:04:23,396 --> 00:04:24,697
- Oh.
133
00:04:24,697 --> 00:04:26,265
- The proof is in the pudding,
right there.
134
00:04:26,265 --> 00:04:28,568
- You can go on and float back
over there on your mattress.
135
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,337
That was not a good witness.
136
00:04:31,337 --> 00:04:34,240
[laughter]
137
00:04:34,841 --> 00:04:36,643
So what's the balance
on this car?
138
00:04:36,643 --> 00:04:40,013
- I believe it's,
like, $14,000 left.
139
00:04:40,013 --> 00:04:42,915
- You owe $14 grand on a 2017?
- Yeah.
140
00:04:42,915 --> 00:04:44,017
- It's a brand-new car.
141
00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:46,919
[laughter]
142
00:04:49,088 --> 00:04:50,657
- Rashad, your sister
is still paying
143
00:04:50,657 --> 00:04:52,125
on the car that you wrecked.
144
00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:54,360
So did you ever step in
and say, "You know what,
145
00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:56,262
Sis, let me help you
with this payment"?
146
00:04:56,262 --> 00:04:57,664
- I was going to, Your Honor,
147
00:04:57,664 --> 00:04:59,198
but she done brought me
to court now.
148
00:04:59,198 --> 00:05:01,467
After that,
you cut yourself off.
149
00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:03,102
Like, you don't bring family
to court.
150
00:05:03,102 --> 00:05:05,071
That's not what you do.
- You do bring family to court.
151
00:05:05,071 --> 00:05:06,472
- Mm-mm.
- Come on, Chris.
152
00:05:06,472 --> 00:05:07,874
You help me out with this one.
153
00:05:07,874 --> 00:05:10,043
- I think Rashad is
a 20-year-old guy that needs
154
00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:13,079
to learn some responsibility.
He hasn't shown any remorse.
155
00:05:13,079 --> 00:05:15,782
And making him pay $5,000
might make him grow up.
156
00:05:15,782 --> 00:05:19,152
- Yeah, it might.
- OK, Ray J.
157
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:21,721
- I think that it's messed up.
Y'all brother and sister.
158
00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:23,856
I'd be mad if Brandi
took me to court.
159
00:05:23,856 --> 00:05:25,491
[laughter]
160
00:05:25,491 --> 00:05:28,695
- Give her $5,000,
and give him a bus pass.
161
00:05:28,695 --> 00:05:30,697
[laughter]
162
00:05:30,697 --> 00:05:33,099
- Zakeemah.
- Yes, ma'am.
163
00:05:33,099 --> 00:05:35,635
- Before I tell you and your
brother Rashad my verdict,
164
00:05:35,635 --> 00:05:36,936
I want to hear
your final thoughts.
165
00:05:36,936 --> 00:05:38,304
- I feel like family
should never
166
00:05:38,304 --> 00:05:39,605
have to take family this far.
167
00:05:39,605 --> 00:05:41,841
But at the end of day,
I still love my brother.
168
00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:43,042
He's the baby.
169
00:05:43,042 --> 00:05:44,577
I'ma keep taking care
of him,
170
00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:46,579
regardless of all this stuff
he keeps putting me through.
171
00:05:46,579 --> 00:05:48,347
- And Rashad,
your final thoughts?
172
00:05:48,347 --> 00:05:51,284
- If she felt like it took
all this to get her money,
173
00:05:51,284 --> 00:05:53,219
then I guess I feel bad.
174
00:05:53,219 --> 00:05:55,254
- So I've come
to my final decision,
175
00:05:55,254 --> 00:05:57,490
and I'm gonna settle this
once and for all.
176
00:05:57,490 --> 00:06:00,193
♪ ♪
177
00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:03,996
And I'm ruling in favor of...
178
00:06:03,996 --> 00:06:05,832
the plaintiff, Zakeemah.
179
00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:10,803
Rashad, you are ordered
to pay Zakeemah $5,000
180
00:06:10,803 --> 00:06:13,039
because you wrecked her car.
181
00:06:13,039 --> 00:06:15,742
I know that $5,000 ain't gonna
pay this car off for you,
182
00:06:15,742 --> 00:06:18,845
but I hope it help you
get you something to ride in.
183
00:06:18,845 --> 00:06:21,314
Come on up here, Prince.
184
00:06:21,314 --> 00:06:23,783
Y'all mom and daddy
must be little as hell.
185
00:06:23,783 --> 00:06:26,753
- What you saying?
Got what you're saying?
186
00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:29,589
- I'm saying y'all look like
three little trolls.
187
00:06:29,589 --> 00:06:30,957
- I'm average height for a man.
188
00:06:30,957 --> 00:06:33,693
- Boy, you would only fit
on a fat bitch keychain.
189
00:06:33,693 --> 00:06:37,063
[laughter]
190
00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:39,298
Now-- now, I settled it.
191
00:06:39,298 --> 00:06:40,500
Get on out this courtroom.
192
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:41,834
Fly out on your little--
193
00:06:41,834 --> 00:06:44,403
on your little blanket.
Bye, y'all. Bye-bye.
194
00:06:44,403 --> 00:06:47,006
- Thank you so much.
- Pull your pants up.
195
00:06:47,006 --> 00:06:50,209
[laughter]
196
00:06:50,209 --> 00:06:51,711
They didn't have a clue
about life.
197
00:06:51,711 --> 00:06:54,313
- They're totally clueless.
- Lord, have mercy.
198
00:06:54,313 --> 00:06:56,783
- I am here to sue
for my grandmother's
199
00:06:56,783 --> 00:06:58,251
cheesecake recipe.
200
00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,253
- Can you even cook?
- I make noodles.
201
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,254
- Noodles?
202
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:03,156
[laughter]
203
00:07:05,859 --> 00:07:07,160
- Hey, jury.
204
00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:09,062
I know y'all know
I'm an honest person.
205
00:07:09,062 --> 00:07:10,563
I'm so honest, baby,
when I came out
206
00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:11,998
the womb, I told the nurse,
207
00:07:11,998 --> 00:07:14,100
"Bitch, you got too much
chin hair on your neck."
208
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:17,270
[laughter]
209
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:18,771
Bailiff, get to bailiffing.
210
00:07:18,771 --> 00:07:22,609
- This is the case of
Renaissance versus Degraff.
211
00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:25,278
- Plaintiff Token Renaissance
is suing his friend
212
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:27,914
Diamond for $2,600,
claiming that she stole
213
00:07:27,914 --> 00:07:30,283
his idea for
a cheesecake business.
214
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,585
- Would you do that
in a murder trial?
215
00:07:32,585 --> 00:07:35,421
He's like, you got to record
this ass from the back.
216
00:07:35,421 --> 00:07:37,924
- Defendant Diamond Degraff
says that she came up
217
00:07:37,924 --> 00:07:39,993
with the idea
her own damn self,
218
00:07:39,993 --> 00:07:41,694
and Token is just desperate
219
00:07:41,694 --> 00:07:43,796
for a slice
of her sweet success.
220
00:07:43,796 --> 00:07:47,433
[dramatic music]
221
00:07:47,433 --> 00:07:49,002
- Token, tell me
why we're here today.
222
00:07:49,002 --> 00:07:52,038
- I am here to sue
my friend Diamond
223
00:07:52,038 --> 00:07:54,240
for my grandmother's
cheesecake recipe
224
00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:55,642
that I shared with her.
225
00:07:55,642 --> 00:07:57,210
My grandmother and I
used to make cheesecakes
226
00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:58,611
together all the time.
227
00:07:58,611 --> 00:08:00,013
I've told Diamond explicitly,
228
00:08:00,013 --> 00:08:03,383
"I plan on carrying out
her legacy of making
229
00:08:03,383 --> 00:08:05,485
a cheesecake and starting
a cheesecake business."
230
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:10,023
I am owed $2,600
and stake in her business.
231
00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:11,624
I want my money.
I want it now.
232
00:08:11,624 --> 00:08:13,259
I want it today.
- OK, Diamond.
233
00:08:13,259 --> 00:08:14,727
Why are you here?
234
00:08:14,727 --> 00:08:16,129
- If he want a steak,
he better go to Ruth's Chris.
235
00:08:16,129 --> 00:08:18,398
[laughter]
236
00:08:18,398 --> 00:08:20,433
God bless Granny.
Never met the lady.
237
00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:21,901
But her cheesecake
ain't messing with mine,
238
00:08:21,901 --> 00:08:24,103
nor do I remember him
talking about her.
239
00:08:24,103 --> 00:08:26,139
I created
She's Caked Cheesecake,
240
00:08:26,139 --> 00:08:28,908
not We's Cake Cheesecake.
- [laughs]
241
00:08:28,908 --> 00:08:30,710
- So I don't know why Token
feels like he has anything
242
00:08:30,710 --> 00:08:32,111
to do with my business.
243
00:08:32,111 --> 00:08:33,446
- Why did you name it that?
244
00:08:33,446 --> 00:08:35,114
- Because I'm caked,
and I make cheesecakes.
245
00:08:35,114 --> 00:08:37,550
[laughter]
- What is that?
246
00:08:37,550 --> 00:08:38,985
- Cake, cake, cake, cake--
247
00:08:38,985 --> 00:08:40,286
- Her butt.
- Oh, ass?
248
00:08:40,286 --> 00:08:42,422
- Yeah, cake.
They call ass cake.
249
00:08:42,422 --> 00:08:43,756
- Cake, cake, cake, cake.
250
00:08:43,756 --> 00:08:45,391
- Ain't nothing back there
but a muffin.
251
00:08:45,391 --> 00:08:48,461
- Token, did you physically
give her a recipe?
252
00:08:48,461 --> 00:08:51,197
- Yeah.
I got it.
253
00:08:51,197 --> 00:08:52,899
- What?
- I gave her the recipe.
254
00:08:52,899 --> 00:08:54,634
- And do you have your recipe?
- Yes, I do.
255
00:08:54,634 --> 00:08:57,804
- OK, let me see
how these recipe add up.
256
00:08:57,804 --> 00:08:59,439
Let me tell you this here.
257
00:08:59,439 --> 00:09:01,507
These don't have
the same ingredients,
258
00:09:01,507 --> 00:09:02,942
and I can't even cook.
259
00:09:02,942 --> 00:09:06,112
- Your Honor, my intellectual
property was stolen.
260
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:07,847
She owes me money.
261
00:09:07,847 --> 00:09:11,084
She's selling cheesecakes
off an idea that I gave her.
262
00:09:11,084 --> 00:09:13,252
I ain't even know
the girl could bake.
263
00:09:13,252 --> 00:09:15,054
I call copyright.
264
00:09:15,054 --> 00:09:19,125
- You can't just declare it,
like I call copyright.
265
00:09:19,125 --> 00:09:21,427
- And I literally just did.
I call copyright.
266
00:09:21,427 --> 00:09:24,263
- What is the definition
of intellectual property?
267
00:09:24,263 --> 00:09:26,699
- That is property
that came from my intellect.
268
00:09:26,699 --> 00:09:27,834
- You got to have
intellect first.
269
00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:29,802
- You understand
what I'm saying?
270
00:09:29,802 --> 00:09:32,038
I've explicitly
had conversations
271
00:09:32,038 --> 00:09:33,373
with Diamond about--
272
00:09:33,373 --> 00:09:34,741
- So tell me about these
explicit conversations.
273
00:09:34,741 --> 00:09:36,376
Go into detail.
- Heard that.
274
00:09:36,376 --> 00:09:37,810
One of our
creative conversations,
275
00:09:37,810 --> 00:09:39,879
I told her, Diamond,
I want to create a restaurant
276
00:09:39,879 --> 00:09:41,280
that's music related.
277
00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:43,049
I want to have
Salt-N-Pepa shrimp.
278
00:09:43,049 --> 00:09:44,951
I want to have
Condoleezza rice.
279
00:09:44,951 --> 00:09:46,319
- Condoleezza rice?
280
00:09:46,319 --> 00:09:48,087
- Condoleezza don't make
no music.
281
00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:49,956
- [laughs]
282
00:09:49,956 --> 00:09:52,191
I think the confusion is
I'm from Brooklyn.
283
00:09:52,191 --> 00:09:54,727
All of my cheesecakes
are named after Jay-Z songs.
284
00:09:54,727 --> 00:09:57,296
My cinnamon one is called
Cinna What? Cinna Who?
285
00:09:57,296 --> 00:09:59,832
- I got cheesecakes named
after Milira songs,
286
00:09:59,832 --> 00:10:01,367
Anita Baker songs,
the Stylistics.
287
00:10:01,367 --> 00:10:02,935
- Sir, I don't give a damn.
288
00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:04,804
[laughter]
289
00:10:04,804 --> 00:10:07,040
- This is ridiculous.
I can't take it, Pat!
290
00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:09,709
This man looking like
"Pirates of the Caribbean."
291
00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:12,412
- And we was gonna have
pirate cheesecake.
292
00:10:12,412 --> 00:10:13,713
We were gonna go--
we was gonna
293
00:10:13,713 --> 00:10:15,181
cross the gambit with it.
294
00:10:15,181 --> 00:10:16,549
- Token, are you high?
295
00:10:16,549 --> 00:10:18,885
[laughter]
296
00:10:18,885 --> 00:10:20,987
Where is the cheesecake now?
297
00:10:20,987 --> 00:10:22,955
- Did you come to court
with a cheesecake?
298
00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:24,457
- Yes, I did, Your Honor.
- Where is it?
299
00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:25,625
- Can somebody bring out
300
00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:27,260
the Biscoff Cookie Butter
cheesecake?
301
00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:28,828
- I ain't know we could
bring no food up in here.
302
00:10:28,828 --> 00:10:30,663
Why would I bring
cheesecake to court?
303
00:10:30,663 --> 00:10:31,931
- Then you unprepared.
304
00:10:31,931 --> 00:10:33,332
This looks delicious.
305
00:10:33,332 --> 00:10:35,034
- Y'all want a piece?
- I do.
306
00:10:35,034 --> 00:10:36,702
- Let me take a whiff.
307
00:10:36,702 --> 00:10:39,272
[inhales deeply]
308
00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:41,340
- Damn, Chris.
- Whew!
309
00:10:41,340 --> 00:10:42,975
- That was a fat boy sniff.
310
00:10:42,975 --> 00:10:45,511
[laughter]
311
00:10:45,511 --> 00:10:48,748
- Sir, can you even cook?
- Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am.
312
00:10:48,748 --> 00:10:51,150
I make noodles.
- Noodles?
313
00:10:51,150 --> 00:10:53,686
[laughter]
314
00:10:53,686 --> 00:10:56,355
- Do you put it
in the cheesecake?
315
00:10:56,355 --> 00:10:58,825
- Y'all ain't never had--
316
00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:02,061
Y'all simple.
Y'all small minded.
317
00:11:02,061 --> 00:11:03,129
- I cannot.
318
00:11:03,129 --> 00:11:04,597
[gavel pounding]
319
00:11:04,597 --> 00:11:06,599
- Why don't you just go
and make your cheesecake?
320
00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:08,701
- But check this out.
It's the way that she did it.
321
00:11:08,701 --> 00:11:11,003
This was supposed
to set me up for success.
322
00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:13,639
- She is not responsible
for your success.
323
00:11:13,639 --> 00:11:15,408
You a grown-ass man.
324
00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:17,210
You responsible
for your success.
325
00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:18,544
- But--
- Now, listen.
326
00:11:18,544 --> 00:11:19,846
You know she over there
selling cheesecakes
327
00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:21,114
out her living room.
328
00:11:21,114 --> 00:11:22,348
You should have took
your ass over there
329
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:24,417
and asked her
could you grease a pan.
330
00:11:24,417 --> 00:11:26,185
- It's not about
her making cheesecakes.
331
00:11:26,185 --> 00:11:29,755
It's about the concept.
- OK. OK.
332
00:11:29,755 --> 00:11:31,824
Come on, Carmen.
Help me out.
333
00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:34,827
- I feel like even if it was
a little side conversations
334
00:11:34,827 --> 00:11:37,196
or whatever,
he never even cared about
335
00:11:37,196 --> 00:11:39,432
what she was doing until
he saw her making money
336
00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:41,367
and profiting off of it.
337
00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:43,402
- Even though she hit it first,
hitting it last
338
00:11:43,402 --> 00:11:45,271
is not bad, either.
Like, you can win too.
339
00:11:45,271 --> 00:11:46,506
- Thank you.
340
00:11:46,506 --> 00:11:48,341
- I was gonna say,
Kanye followed him.
341
00:11:48,341 --> 00:11:50,243
[laughter]
342
00:11:50,243 --> 00:11:51,944
- Oh, no!
343
00:11:51,944 --> 00:11:55,148
[laughter]
344
00:11:56,015 --> 00:11:58,651
- He my friend now too.
345
00:11:58,651 --> 00:11:59,886
- I've come to
a final decision,
346
00:11:59,886 --> 00:12:02,655
and I'm gonna settle this
once and for all.
347
00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:05,358
[dramatic music]
348
00:12:05,358 --> 00:12:07,326
I'm ruling in favor of...
349
00:12:07,326 --> 00:12:10,429
♪ ♪
350
00:12:10,429 --> 00:12:13,566
Diamond.
351
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,501
You don't have
to pay him anything,
352
00:12:15,501 --> 00:12:17,069
and let me tell you why.
353
00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:18,671
Actions speak louder
than words.
354
00:12:18,671 --> 00:12:19,872
- Heard that.
355
00:12:19,872 --> 00:12:21,207
- All you want to do
is leave a legacy
356
00:12:21,207 --> 00:12:22,775
of running your damn mouth.
357
00:12:22,775 --> 00:12:24,277
- That ain't true.
358
00:12:24,277 --> 00:12:25,978
- If you can really go bake
your grandmama cheesecake,
359
00:12:25,978 --> 00:12:27,446
go bake it.
360
00:12:27,446 --> 00:12:30,082
And then come back in here
and sue yourself next time
361
00:12:30,082 --> 00:12:31,784
for being so damn slow.
362
00:12:31,784 --> 00:12:33,085
- Thank you, Your Honor.
- All right.
363
00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:35,922
I settled it.
Bye.
364
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,523
- Y'all ain't never got
to worry about me again.
365
00:12:37,523 --> 00:12:39,859
- Thank you, Your Honor.
Y'all have a great day.
366
00:12:39,859 --> 00:12:41,294
Y'all can have the cake, too.
367
00:12:41,294 --> 00:12:43,829
- That was so damn crazy.
- It was crazy.
368
00:12:43,829 --> 00:12:45,965
- Doing the most.
- Doing a lot.
369
00:12:45,965 --> 00:12:48,768
- All right, let's get
this next case popping.
370
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:50,403
Where the hell Kourtlyn at?
371
00:12:50,403 --> 00:12:51,971
Kourtlyn!
- I'm coming.
372
00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:53,873
I'm coming right back.
Hold on.
373
00:12:53,873 --> 00:12:55,975
- Who sent this text message?
- She did.
374
00:12:55,975 --> 00:12:57,610
- "I'm not mad about
how you feel,
375
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,645
but you very stubborn."
- Now, that was too nice.
376
00:12:59,645 --> 00:13:01,314
That ain't how she says.
- How she said it?
377
00:13:01,314 --> 00:13:03,349
- [scoffs]
You're very stubborn.
378
00:13:03,349 --> 00:13:04,550
- That's it.
379
00:13:04,550 --> 00:13:05,618
- Y'all go have fun, though.
- Mm-hmm.
380
00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:06,619
- Yep.
- Uh-huh.
381
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:08,287
[laughter]
- Yep.
382
00:13:09,689 --> 00:13:11,624
[dramatic music]
383
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,827
- I love taking a family trip,
especially when
384
00:13:13,827 --> 00:13:15,128
you ain't got to foot the bill.
385
00:13:15,128 --> 00:13:16,696
Give me some money, Karlous.
386
00:13:16,696 --> 00:13:18,965
- As soon as I get
my "Ms. Pat" check,
387
00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:21,167
I'll send you some.
388
00:13:21,167 --> 00:13:23,903
- Y'all get paid for this?
- She says for exposure.
389
00:13:23,903 --> 00:13:25,472
- I had to do that, too,
to get a job.
390
00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:27,273
[laughter]
391
00:13:28,775 --> 00:13:30,276
- Get to bailiffing, Bailiff.
392
00:13:30,276 --> 00:13:34,047
- This is the case of
Merritt versus Butler.
393
00:13:34,047 --> 00:13:36,049
You may now enter.
394
00:13:36,049 --> 00:13:39,319
- Plaintiff Sade Merritt
is suing her sister, Jasmine,
395
00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:43,656
for $1,450, the amount lost
when Jasmine backed out
396
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:46,192
of Sade's birthday trip
to Jamaica.
397
00:13:46,192 --> 00:13:49,462
Defendant Jasmine Butler
says she canceled
398
00:13:49,462 --> 00:13:52,398
because Sade bailed
on her Vegas birthday bash
399
00:13:52,398 --> 00:13:54,167
just a month earlier.
400
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:58,505
And what goes around,
comes around, Sis.
401
00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:00,306
- Sade, why are you here today?
402
00:14:00,306 --> 00:14:04,410
- I'm here because I'm suing
my sister Jasmine for $1,450.
403
00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:07,447
We agreed to go to Jamaica
for my 35th birthday.
404
00:14:07,447 --> 00:14:11,151
We had paid for it,
and it was non-refundable.
405
00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:13,486
And she reneged on the trip.
406
00:14:13,486 --> 00:14:16,589
I didn't feel comfortable
gonna Jamaica by myself,
407
00:14:16,589 --> 00:14:17,991
so I want my money back.
408
00:14:17,991 --> 00:14:19,926
- Black folk love
going to Jamaica.
409
00:14:19,926 --> 00:14:21,394
- We do.
410
00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:23,296
- Well, let me hear your side
of the story, Jasmine.
411
00:14:23,296 --> 00:14:24,964
Why are you here?
412
00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:27,267
- I'm here because my sister is
trying to sue me for some money
413
00:14:27,267 --> 00:14:29,169
she ain't never getting.
- Ooh.
414
00:14:29,169 --> 00:14:31,471
- You know, she ruined
my birthday trip first,
415
00:14:31,471 --> 00:14:33,373
and so I didn't like
how she ruined it,
416
00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:35,208
so I decided to cancel.
417
00:14:35,208 --> 00:14:37,177
- Did you say she canceled
on your birthday trip?
418
00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:40,013
- Yes, Jasmine canceled on
my trip because I told her
419
00:14:40,013 --> 00:14:41,781
I didn't want to go on hers.
420
00:14:41,781 --> 00:14:44,050
- Sade, back up.
Tell me the whole story.
421
00:14:44,050 --> 00:14:46,119
- OK, so my birthday
is in June,
422
00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:48,121
and her birthday is in August.
423
00:14:48,121 --> 00:14:50,023
My birthday trip
was already paid for
424
00:14:50,023 --> 00:14:52,492
before she even said anything
about her trip.
425
00:14:52,492 --> 00:14:55,862
Then she said, "I want to go
to Las Vegas for her birthday."
426
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:58,398
So she created a group chat,
and she included
427
00:14:58,398 --> 00:14:59,766
her friends and my family,
428
00:14:59,766 --> 00:15:02,101
and she had created
an itinerary for the trip,
429
00:15:02,101 --> 00:15:04,103
and she wanted to go
to Dinner in the Sky.
430
00:15:04,103 --> 00:15:05,505
But I told her
I didn't want to go
431
00:15:05,505 --> 00:15:06,873
because I'm afraid of heights.
432
00:15:06,873 --> 00:15:08,675
That's how the argument started
because if I'm
433
00:15:08,675 --> 00:15:10,543
paying my money, baby,
I'm not going
434
00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:12,045
where you want me to go at.
435
00:15:12,045 --> 00:15:13,680
- For people that don't know
what Dinner in the Sky is,
436
00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:15,348
it's just these people
got up in the air,
437
00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:17,617
about 100 feet in the air,
and you eat.
438
00:15:17,617 --> 00:15:20,253
- Hell, no.
No. No.
439
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:22,055
- It's pretty,
but it's also very scary
440
00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:23,523
if you don't like heights.
441
00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:25,391
So you told her
you wasn't going.
442
00:15:25,391 --> 00:15:28,461
- Your Honor, she texted
everybody in the group chat
443
00:15:28,461 --> 00:15:31,364
that she was no longer going,
and everybody started
444
00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:34,734
backing out one by one,
one by one, so that
445
00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:36,135
I didn't have anybody else
to go with me
446
00:15:36,135 --> 00:15:39,305
for my birthday trip.
So I was like, OK,
447
00:15:39,305 --> 00:15:40,740
Since she text that
in the group chat,
448
00:15:40,740 --> 00:15:42,575
I decided right after
that to text her
449
00:15:42,575 --> 00:15:43,843
and tell her
that I'm not going
450
00:15:43,843 --> 00:15:45,511
to Jamaica for her birthday.
451
00:15:45,511 --> 00:15:47,146
- Let me make sure
I get this right.
452
00:15:47,146 --> 00:15:50,183
After you paid for
your sister's birthday trip,
453
00:15:50,183 --> 00:15:52,652
you canceled the trip
because you couldn't
454
00:15:52,652 --> 00:15:55,121
boss her around
on your birthday trip.
455
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:56,789
Let me see the group chat.
456
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:59,025
- I'd have went with you, girl.
457
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:01,894
- Who sent this text message?
- She did.
458
00:16:01,894 --> 00:16:04,430
- OK, so the text message say,
"I'm not mad about how
459
00:16:04,430 --> 00:16:06,366
"you feel,
but you're very stubborn
460
00:16:06,366 --> 00:16:08,635
"and I get this is a trip
you planning
461
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:11,304
so I'll bow out
and say you got it."
462
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,039
- Nah, that was too nice!
That ain't how she said it.
463
00:16:13,039 --> 00:16:14,607
- Yeah, come on.
Pass it to her.
464
00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:15,642
- How she said it?
465
00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:18,011
- [scoffs]
466
00:16:18,011 --> 00:16:21,047
[laughter]
467
00:16:22,282 --> 00:16:24,417
"I'm not mad about
how you feel,
468
00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:27,253
but your very stubborn..."
- That's it.
469
00:16:27,253 --> 00:16:29,555
- "And I get that this
is your trip
470
00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:33,793
"you planning, so I'll just
bow out and say,
471
00:16:33,793 --> 00:16:34,794
y'all go have fun though."
472
00:16:34,794 --> 00:16:36,195
- Mm-hmm.
- Come on.
473
00:16:36,195 --> 00:16:37,764
That's it right there.
Come on, yeah.
474
00:16:37,764 --> 00:16:38,998
- That's how you read that.
475
00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:40,600
- Yep.
- Thank you.
476
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:42,001
- Well, that was nasty.
477
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:45,171
If it came out like Tamar said,
that was nasty.
478
00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:47,940
You don't think that was
a little bit petty, Sade?
479
00:16:51,511 --> 00:16:53,313
- Sade Merritt
is suing her sister
480
00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:56,483
Jasmine for $1,450
for backing out
481
00:16:56,483 --> 00:16:58,251
of her Jamaican birthday bash.
482
00:16:58,251 --> 00:17:00,320
But Jasmine
says Sade ruined
483
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:02,456
her birthday first
and is now
484
00:17:02,456 --> 00:17:04,891
Ja-makin' her
completely crazy.
485
00:17:04,891 --> 00:17:07,627
Ms. Pat is about to settle it.
486
00:17:07,627 --> 00:17:09,196
- Let me make sure
I get this right.
487
00:17:09,196 --> 00:17:11,198
She was supposed to go on the
birthday trip with you too.
488
00:17:11,198 --> 00:17:12,399
- Yes.
489
00:17:12,399 --> 00:17:14,067
- So who paid
for the Jamaican trip?
490
00:17:14,067 --> 00:17:15,268
- We both did.
491
00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:16,770
We split the cost
down the middle.
492
00:17:16,770 --> 00:17:18,305
- Sade, you got a receipt
for what you paid for?
493
00:17:18,305 --> 00:17:20,407
- Yes, I do.
- Let me see it.
494
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:23,109
So let me just
follow this money.
495
00:17:23,109 --> 00:17:25,512
So the trip was $2,900.
- Mm-hmm.
496
00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:27,314
- And by her not going,
497
00:17:27,314 --> 00:17:29,516
you lost $1,450
because you didn't go.
498
00:17:29,516 --> 00:17:30,684
- Yes.
499
00:17:30,684 --> 00:17:32,118
- And your trip to Vegas,
500
00:17:32,118 --> 00:17:34,321
you didn't lose anything
because everybody backed out,
501
00:17:34,321 --> 00:17:35,956
so nobody paid.
- Yes, yes.
502
00:17:35,956 --> 00:17:37,257
- I just wanted
to get that clear.
503
00:17:37,257 --> 00:17:39,526
OK, Carmen.
Tell me what you're thinking.
504
00:17:39,526 --> 00:17:40,861
- Y'all need to squash this.
505
00:17:40,861 --> 00:17:43,029
Y'all already dressed
like Halloween today.
506
00:17:43,029 --> 00:17:44,698
Y'all got more holidays
coming up
507
00:17:44,698 --> 00:17:47,200
that y'all need to get together
and be sisters on.
508
00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:49,603
- Her fake innocence is crazy.
509
00:17:49,603 --> 00:17:51,972
This-- this right here--
510
00:17:51,972 --> 00:17:54,508
[laughter]
511
00:17:54,508 --> 00:17:56,877
- It's not that serious.
It's a birthday.
512
00:17:56,877 --> 00:18:00,180
Like, you want to fall out
with your sister for $1,400
513
00:18:00,180 --> 00:18:03,483
and then get on a group text
and show the division
514
00:18:03,483 --> 00:18:07,721
to everybody that's on that
group text over a disagreement.
515
00:18:07,721 --> 00:18:09,055
That's crazy to me.
516
00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:10,490
- I'm gonna go to you, Sade.
517
00:18:10,490 --> 00:18:12,926
What you should have done
is had a side conversation
518
00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:15,529
with her because immediately
in the group text,
519
00:18:15,529 --> 00:18:17,097
everybody else
had their little ups
520
00:18:17,097 --> 00:18:20,300
and downs feelings about her,
so they all pulled out too.
521
00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:24,671
Jasmine,
you a spoiled ass brat.
522
00:18:24,671 --> 00:18:28,341
[laughter]
523
00:18:28,341 --> 00:18:30,777
You canceled
your sister birthday trip
524
00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:32,679
because you
couldn't boss her around
525
00:18:32,679 --> 00:18:33,947
on your birthday trip.
526
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:35,782
And you threw away your money,
527
00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:37,884
and you threw away
your sister money.
528
00:18:37,884 --> 00:18:40,654
With that, I've come
to my final decision,
529
00:18:40,654 --> 00:18:42,656
and I'm gonna settle this
once and for all.
530
00:18:42,656 --> 00:18:45,358
[dramatic music]
531
00:18:45,358 --> 00:18:46,993
I'm ruling in favor of...
532
00:18:46,993 --> 00:18:48,495
♪ ♪
533
00:18:48,495 --> 00:18:50,997
The plaintiff, Sade.
534
00:18:50,997 --> 00:18:53,233
Jasmine, you are ordered
535
00:18:53,233 --> 00:18:57,837
to pay Sade $1,450
536
00:18:57,837 --> 00:19:01,074
for being the biggest,
cutest Brown-skinned brat
537
00:19:01,074 --> 00:19:03,877
I've ever seen in my life.
538
00:19:03,877 --> 00:19:06,112
With that said,
I just settled it.
539
00:19:06,112 --> 00:19:08,081
- Give me a hug.
- Aw.
540
00:19:08,081 --> 00:19:09,749
[applause]
- Thank you.
541
00:19:09,749 --> 00:19:11,117
- Thank you.
542
00:19:11,117 --> 00:19:12,652
- That was the right decision,
Ms. Pat.
543
00:19:12,652 --> 00:19:15,221
- We went to vacation
one time, and I got Pat
544
00:19:15,221 --> 00:19:16,823
to go down the water slide.
545
00:19:16,823 --> 00:19:20,193
- And her wig fell off
in front of all those people.
546
00:19:20,193 --> 00:19:21,661
- And they thought
it was a dog.
547
00:19:21,661 --> 00:19:23,463
They thought my wig was a dog.
They was like, "No pets."
548
00:19:23,463 --> 00:19:24,898
And I'm like, "That's my wig."
549
00:19:24,898 --> 00:19:26,366
[laughter]
550
00:19:28,802 --> 00:19:30,170
- Next time on
"Ms. Pat Settles It"...
551
00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:31,505
- It was supposed to be
a surprise birthday trip.
552
00:19:31,505 --> 00:19:34,341
I got a ghosted.
- This man got a whole fiancée.
553
00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:38,746
- Your fiancée is here.
- I love this courtroom!
554
00:19:38,746 --> 00:19:40,180
- She left me stranded
at the airport.
555
00:19:40,180 --> 00:19:41,949
- You got to start taking
some accountability.
556
00:19:41,949 --> 00:19:43,817
- Y'all act like
I flew the damn plane!
557
00:19:43,817 --> 00:19:46,286
- Who are you yelling at?
- I was hot as hell!
558
00:19:46,286 --> 00:19:47,755
- You made this receipt.
559
00:19:47,755 --> 00:19:49,456
- It was nothing wrong
with the car.
560
00:19:49,456 --> 00:19:51,759
- Transmission is spelled
wrong on here.
561
00:19:51,759 --> 00:19:53,260
[laughter]