1 00:00:00,967 --> 00:00:02,102 - Hey, y'all, I'm Ms. Pat. 2 00:00:02,102 --> 00:00:03,403 - All rise. 3 00:00:03,403 --> 00:00:04,771 And I know the inside of a courtroom. 4 00:00:04,771 --> 00:00:07,207 I'm a convicted felon with a GED. 5 00:00:07,207 --> 00:00:09,509 Now I'm sitting on this side of the bench. 6 00:00:09,509 --> 00:00:11,277 Y'all are killin' me. [laughter] 7 00:00:11,277 --> 00:00:12,579 These are real cases 8 00:00:12,579 --> 00:00:13,980 with real money on the line. 9 00:00:13,980 --> 00:00:16,449 And I'm bring my own friends to court as my jury. 10 00:00:16,449 --> 00:00:17,884 - What is this, "Looney Tunes"? 11 00:00:17,884 --> 00:00:19,285 - Y'all may have started this mess, 12 00:00:19,285 --> 00:00:20,587 but I'm gonna settle it. 13 00:00:20,587 --> 00:00:23,223 - I love this courtroom. 14 00:00:23,223 --> 00:00:25,992 - All rise, 'cause court is back in session. 15 00:00:25,992 --> 00:00:27,627 [gavel bangs] 16 00:00:27,627 --> 00:00:29,229 [intriguing music] 17 00:00:29,229 --> 00:00:33,500 - She lays down the law like she lays down her edges-- 18 00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:35,135 slick and sassy. 19 00:00:35,135 --> 00:00:38,972 All rise for Ms. Pat. 20 00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:44,677 ♪ ♪ 21 00:00:44,677 --> 00:00:46,346 - Y'all can have a seat. 22 00:00:46,346 --> 00:00:48,181 Listen, I know I'm a judge and all, but breaking the law 23 00:00:48,181 --> 00:00:49,215 is fun. 24 00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:50,316 Ain't it, jury? 25 00:00:50,316 --> 00:00:51,684 - Objection. 26 00:00:51,684 --> 00:00:52,685 - To what? 27 00:00:52,685 --> 00:00:53,820 - They guilty. 28 00:00:53,820 --> 00:00:55,121 - We ain't even said nothing yet. 29 00:00:55,121 --> 00:00:57,023 - But I'm just saying, I know they guilty. 30 00:00:57,023 --> 00:00:59,192 - Look, you been watching "Law & Order," a marathon. 31 00:00:59,192 --> 00:01:01,661 [laughter] 32 00:01:01,661 --> 00:01:03,196 - Let's get this thing poppin'. 33 00:01:03,196 --> 00:01:06,599 - This is the case of Sherrod versus Isreal. 34 00:01:06,599 --> 00:01:08,735 You may now enter. 35 00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:11,905 - Plaintiff Cortez Sherrod is suing his ex, Charles, 36 00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:15,708 for $1,000 to pay for the food app deliveries he says 37 00:01:15,708 --> 00:01:17,577 Charles ordered on his dime. 38 00:01:17,577 --> 00:01:20,013 Defendant Charles Isreal says here's 39 00:01:20,013 --> 00:01:21,448 the naked truth-- 40 00:01:21,448 --> 00:01:24,284 whatever food he orders, Cortez eats, too. 41 00:01:24,284 --> 00:01:26,719 He can't be banking on Charles to drop 42 00:01:26,719 --> 00:01:29,289 dough for every delivery. 43 00:01:29,289 --> 00:01:31,157 - Just want to tell y'all before I get started, 44 00:01:31,157 --> 00:01:32,725 this a jury of my peers, OK? 45 00:01:32,725 --> 00:01:35,361 I may or may not use them, but they're here today because I 46 00:01:35,361 --> 00:01:36,529 claim them on my taxes. 47 00:01:36,529 --> 00:01:38,798 [laughter] 48 00:01:39,732 --> 00:01:41,100 All right. 49 00:01:41,100 --> 00:01:42,402 Cortez, tell me why you're here today. 50 00:01:42,402 --> 00:01:44,704 - Your Honor, I'm here today suing my ex-fiancé 51 00:01:44,704 --> 00:01:46,105 for $1,000. 52 00:01:46,105 --> 00:01:48,808 He basically is supposed to be "a chef." 53 00:01:48,808 --> 00:01:52,078 We were together for six years, and I haven't gotten a meal 54 00:01:52,078 --> 00:01:54,113 from him, cooked for me, ever. 55 00:01:54,113 --> 00:01:56,316 And then on top of that, we broke up, 56 00:01:56,316 --> 00:01:58,318 and he ran up my food delivery account 57 00:01:58,318 --> 00:01:59,319 over $1,000. 58 00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:00,487 And I need my money back. 59 00:02:00,487 --> 00:02:01,855 - OK. - Ooh. 60 00:02:01,855 --> 00:02:03,356 - Charles, what's your side of the story? 61 00:02:03,356 --> 00:02:04,757 - I'm confused because there's a bunch of lies 62 00:02:04,757 --> 00:02:06,693 just being told right now. 63 00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:07,961 I have cooked for him before. 64 00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:10,029 But I am a private chef, and I cook all day long. 65 00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:11,397 So what do I like getting off of work, 66 00:02:11,397 --> 00:02:12,732 coming home, and cooking for you when 67 00:02:12,732 --> 00:02:14,434 I've been cooking all day? 68 00:02:14,434 --> 00:02:15,768 - So all this he's in here crying and complaining about, 69 00:02:15,768 --> 00:02:17,504 when have I ever got a meal from you? 70 00:02:17,504 --> 00:02:18,805 We're still living in the same house. 71 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:20,173 I'm still ordering food for both of us. 72 00:02:20,173 --> 00:02:21,474 He's-- he's not mentioning that. 73 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:23,009 - Oh. 74 00:02:23,009 --> 00:02:24,344 So y'all still live in the same house, but you broke up? 75 00:02:24,344 --> 00:02:25,745 - Mm. 76 00:02:25,745 --> 00:02:28,014 - So did you know he was using your food account? 77 00:02:28,014 --> 00:02:29,782 - Originally, you know, we were together. 78 00:02:29,782 --> 00:02:31,217 We shared a food account. 79 00:02:31,217 --> 00:02:32,952 But when we broke up, he was still ordering food. 80 00:02:32,952 --> 00:02:34,754 - You was upstairs while he was downstairs 81 00:02:34,754 --> 00:02:36,256 eating on your account? 82 00:02:36,256 --> 00:02:37,557 - Yeah. 83 00:02:37,557 --> 00:02:39,425 - Was you eating the food that he ordered? 84 00:02:39,425 --> 00:02:41,561 - I mean, sometimes. 85 00:02:41,561 --> 00:02:44,264 [laughter] 86 00:02:46,299 --> 00:02:48,768 - How you gonna sue for some food that you ate some of? 87 00:02:48,768 --> 00:02:49,869 - He tripping. 88 00:02:49,869 --> 00:02:51,271 - My thing is you a chef. 89 00:02:51,271 --> 00:02:52,338 Why you eating out? 90 00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:54,107 - He's also a nude chef. 91 00:02:54,107 --> 00:02:55,475 - What's that? 92 00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:56,676 - Oh, he cook naked. 93 00:02:56,676 --> 00:02:57,710 - He cooked naked. 94 00:02:57,710 --> 00:02:59,746 [laughter] 95 00:03:00,813 --> 00:03:02,782 - Who orders a naked chef? 96 00:03:02,782 --> 00:03:04,584 - I got an app myself. 97 00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:06,519 On a lonely night, won't he do it? 98 00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:09,289 [laughter] 99 00:03:09,289 --> 00:03:10,823 - I wouldn't want anybody making 100 00:03:10,823 --> 00:03:12,859 my eggs with no live meat. 101 00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,260 - I do. 102 00:03:14,260 --> 00:03:16,829 - I just wanted to know, are you a top chef? 103 00:03:16,829 --> 00:03:19,365 [laughter] 104 00:03:21,768 --> 00:03:24,671 - Does he have to ask people if they have nut allergies? 105 00:03:24,671 --> 00:03:28,541 [laughter] 106 00:03:28,541 --> 00:03:29,542 - All right. 107 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:30,543 All right. 108 00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:31,744 How long was y'all engaged? 109 00:03:31,744 --> 00:03:32,845 - Two years. 110 00:03:32,845 --> 00:03:34,013 - Who broke off the engagement? 111 00:03:34,013 --> 00:03:35,281 - Me. 112 00:03:35,281 --> 00:03:36,950 I bought the rings, took the rings back. 113 00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:38,151 I still got the rings. 114 00:03:38,151 --> 00:03:39,319 - And why did you break it off? 115 00:03:39,319 --> 00:03:40,320 Because-- 116 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:41,955 - I caught him cheating. 117 00:03:41,955 --> 00:03:43,222 - Well, how did you find out? 118 00:03:43,222 --> 00:03:44,657 - I put a camera in the house. 119 00:03:44,657 --> 00:03:46,192 - In your house? 120 00:03:46,192 --> 00:03:48,795 - You brought somebody into the home that y'all share? 121 00:03:48,795 --> 00:03:49,829 - I didn't bring nobody to the home. 122 00:03:49,829 --> 00:03:51,064 - Yes, he did. 123 00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:52,298 - He was having FaceTime sex with somebody. 124 00:03:52,298 --> 00:03:53,466 That's bringing somebody in my house. 125 00:03:53,466 --> 00:03:54,934 I seen it. - What is FaceTime sex? 126 00:03:54,934 --> 00:03:55,902 - It was on the camera. - You just get on FaceTime, 127 00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:57,837 Pat, and you get a good angle. 128 00:03:57,837 --> 00:03:59,872 - They know what's-- [laughter] 129 00:03:59,872 --> 00:04:02,875 - What happened to Karlous? 130 00:04:02,875 --> 00:04:03,943 - Talk about something else. 131 00:04:03,943 --> 00:04:04,944 We ain't got nothing else? 132 00:04:04,944 --> 00:04:06,145 [laughter] 133 00:04:06,145 --> 00:04:07,447 - See, I was nice to you. 134 00:04:07,447 --> 00:04:08,982 Karlous were ready to eat your ass back-- 135 00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:10,717 - No, the [bleep] y'all wasn't. 136 00:04:10,717 --> 00:04:11,751 [bleep] y'all I wasn't. 137 00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,853 [laughter] 138 00:04:13,853 --> 00:04:16,289 You need find a way to say that better. 139 00:04:16,289 --> 00:04:19,325 - It's even funnier, 'cause you're a naked chef. 140 00:04:19,325 --> 00:04:21,928 [laughter] 141 00:04:23,363 --> 00:04:25,031 - Why do y'all still live together? 142 00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:26,332 - That's what I'm here for now. 143 00:04:26,332 --> 00:04:28,201 I want to get my money so I can have a deposit, 144 00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:29,202 so I can move out. 145 00:04:29,202 --> 00:04:30,403 Because we can't do this no more. 146 00:04:30,403 --> 00:04:31,971 - Did you turn your card off, or did 147 00:04:31,971 --> 00:04:33,806 you remove it from his phone? 148 00:04:33,806 --> 00:04:35,708 - I sent text messages to him asking 149 00:04:35,708 --> 00:04:37,777 him to stop using my card, and I got 150 00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:38,845 evidence right here for it. 151 00:04:38,845 --> 00:04:40,346 - All right, let me see. 152 00:04:40,346 --> 00:04:42,615 All you had to do was turn off your food account. 153 00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:45,251 If you left the credit card on there, you wanted to-- man, 154 00:04:45,251 --> 00:04:46,786 I'm not about to read all this shit. 155 00:04:46,786 --> 00:04:47,920 [laughter] 156 00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:48,921 Not out loud, anyway. 157 00:04:48,921 --> 00:04:50,423 I ain't got time for all that. 158 00:04:50,423 --> 00:04:52,925 - No, Ms. Pat, please-- please read the text messages. 159 00:04:52,925 --> 00:04:54,494 Just read page 2. - OK. 160 00:04:54,494 --> 00:04:55,495 Well, go on, Karlous. 161 00:04:55,495 --> 00:04:56,562 Read page 2. 162 00:04:56,562 --> 00:04:57,797 - OK. 163 00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,165 It says, "That's crazy. 164 00:04:59,165 --> 00:05:01,267 "U can't spend my money without my permission. 165 00:05:01,267 --> 00:05:02,568 "You're a chef. 166 00:05:02,568 --> 00:05:03,569 Cook something!" 167 00:05:03,569 --> 00:05:05,371 "& you're a bank manager. 168 00:05:05,371 --> 00:05:06,739 Spend something." 169 00:05:06,739 --> 00:05:08,508 [laughter] 170 00:05:10,176 --> 00:05:13,379 "Just cuz I'm a chef don't mean I'm obligated to cook for you!" 171 00:05:13,379 --> 00:05:14,747 "Just because I work at the bank 172 00:05:14,747 --> 00:05:16,115 don't mean I'm made of money!" 173 00:05:16,115 --> 00:05:18,217 - Why do you say it like Samuel Jackson? 174 00:05:18,217 --> 00:05:19,719 - Yeah. [laughter] 175 00:05:19,719 --> 00:05:23,289 - Move my [bleep] card off your [bleep]. 176 00:05:23,289 --> 00:05:24,490 - OK. 177 00:05:24,490 --> 00:05:26,092 I'm going over here to my jury. Come on. 178 00:05:26,092 --> 00:05:27,960 - Baby, this right here is a lover's quarrel. 179 00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:29,495 This is not a breakup, OK? 180 00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:30,496 When the last time y'all did it? 181 00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:31,798 - No, Tamar. No. 182 00:05:31,798 --> 00:05:33,666 - I just want to know. - No! 183 00:05:33,666 --> 00:05:35,034 That ain't got nothing to do with this-- 184 00:05:35,034 --> 00:05:36,202 - Like, it was last night or whatever we see. 185 00:05:36,202 --> 00:05:37,370 - No. 186 00:05:37,370 --> 00:05:38,604 - Shut up, Karlous. 187 00:05:38,604 --> 00:05:39,605 - No further questions. 188 00:05:39,605 --> 00:05:41,507 [laughter] 189 00:05:41,507 --> 00:05:43,976 - So where do y'all relationships stand now? 190 00:05:43,976 --> 00:05:45,144 - I don't hate this man. 191 00:05:45,144 --> 00:05:46,813 I'm just I feel a little betrayed, 192 00:05:46,813 --> 00:05:49,682 and I feel like I'm due what I'm asking for. 193 00:05:49,682 --> 00:05:51,751 And I'm ready to move out and move on with my life. 194 00:05:51,751 --> 00:05:53,052 - OK. 195 00:05:53,052 --> 00:05:54,454 What do you gotta say to help your case, baby? 196 00:05:54,454 --> 00:05:55,722 - He can go to hell. 197 00:05:55,722 --> 00:05:56,989 I'm not paying him nothing. 198 00:05:56,989 --> 00:05:58,858 [together] Ooh. 199 00:05:58,858 --> 00:05:59,959 - Wow. - Oh. 200 00:05:59,959 --> 00:06:01,394 - OK, disrespectful. - Charles. 201 00:06:01,394 --> 00:06:03,763 - All right, well, I've come to my final decision, 202 00:06:03,763 --> 00:06:06,032 and I'm going to settle this once and for all. 203 00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:08,401 [gavel bangs] 204 00:06:08,401 --> 00:06:10,503 I'm ruling in favor of-- 205 00:06:10,503 --> 00:06:12,705 [tense music] 206 00:06:12,705 --> 00:06:14,440 the defendant, Charles. 207 00:06:14,440 --> 00:06:15,975 [upbeat funky music] 208 00:06:15,975 --> 00:06:18,010 You don't owe Cortez anything. 209 00:06:18,010 --> 00:06:19,545 And let me tell you why, Cortez. 210 00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:21,013 You work at the bank. 211 00:06:21,013 --> 00:06:24,851 You could have cut your card off at $50, $100, $200. 212 00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,319 You just let it kept going. 213 00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:28,688 You could have got out of this a long time ago if that's 214 00:06:28,688 --> 00:06:30,123 what you wanted to do. 215 00:06:30,123 --> 00:06:32,558 But we all know you did not want to get out of it. 216 00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:35,161 You like that little freaky man right there in that blouse? 217 00:06:35,161 --> 00:06:36,195 [laughter] 218 00:06:36,195 --> 00:06:37,263 And it's OK. 219 00:06:37,263 --> 00:06:38,264 I settled it. 220 00:06:38,264 --> 00:06:39,732 Y'all get out of my courtroom. 221 00:06:39,732 --> 00:06:41,167 - You are dismissed. 222 00:06:41,167 --> 00:06:42,368 Don't stop by the kitchen. 223 00:06:42,368 --> 00:06:43,703 Just go straight. 224 00:06:43,703 --> 00:06:45,471 [laughter] 225 00:06:45,471 --> 00:06:47,140 - What did y'all think about that case? 226 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:48,808 - He was mad because he broke up with him. 227 00:06:48,808 --> 00:06:50,009 And so he wanted to come in here, 228 00:06:50,009 --> 00:06:51,477 trying to sue him for some food he ate. 229 00:06:51,477 --> 00:06:52,512 That's ridiculous. 230 00:06:52,512 --> 00:06:54,080 - Yes. 231 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,515 - I don't want to hear nothing else about Uber Meats. 232 00:06:55,515 --> 00:06:58,017 [laughter] 233 00:06:58,017 --> 00:07:00,419 - She did not pay me what she owes me. 234 00:07:00,419 --> 00:07:01,420 - How did y'all meet? 235 00:07:01,420 --> 00:07:02,822 - The federal penitentiary. 236 00:07:02,822 --> 00:07:04,123 - Come on, now. 237 00:07:04,123 --> 00:07:06,692 - I want to say something, but I'm scared. 238 00:07:06,692 --> 00:07:08,261 OK, OK. 239 00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:09,562 [laughter] 240 00:07:11,564 --> 00:07:12,999 - How you doing, jury? 241 00:07:12,999 --> 00:07:14,534 Y'all better watch y'all mouth today, baby. 242 00:07:14,534 --> 00:07:16,969 They only got so many bleeps per episode. 243 00:07:16,969 --> 00:07:18,404 - Man, [bleep] it. 244 00:07:18,404 --> 00:07:22,008 [laughter] 245 00:07:22,008 --> 00:07:23,576 - All right, bailiff. Get to bailiffin'. 246 00:07:23,576 --> 00:07:27,180 - This is the case of Coleman versus Davis. 247 00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:29,482 You may now enter. 248 00:07:29,482 --> 00:07:31,718 - Plaintiff Crystal Coleman is suing her friend 249 00:07:31,718 --> 00:07:34,587 and ex-cellmate Sheshe for $4,000, 250 00:07:34,587 --> 00:07:37,156 money she says she's owed for helping out 251 00:07:37,156 --> 00:07:39,025 with transcription services. 252 00:07:39,025 --> 00:07:41,828 Defendant Sheshe Davis says she fixed 253 00:07:41,828 --> 00:07:43,429 Crystal's credit for free. 254 00:07:43,429 --> 00:07:45,398 But if her pal from the pen is going 255 00:07:45,398 --> 00:07:49,569 to play dirty out in the yard, Sheshe is ready for a brawl. 256 00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:53,072 She's countersuing for 5 large. 257 00:07:53,072 --> 00:07:55,141 - Crystal Coleman, why you here today? 258 00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:59,145 - I'm suing my sister friend for $4,000. 259 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:03,316 I typed up some motions for her, and she did not pay me. 260 00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:06,586 So what I need her to do is motion my money over here. 261 00:08:06,586 --> 00:08:08,354 [laughter] 262 00:08:08,354 --> 00:08:11,057 - Sheshe, let me hear your side of the story. 263 00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:14,494 - Well, I'm here because Crystal thinks that I'm going 264 00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:15,928 to be paying her for 55 hours. 265 00:08:15,928 --> 00:08:18,731 She didn't do 55 hours or no nothing. 266 00:08:18,731 --> 00:08:21,267 If anything, she owe me some money, 267 00:08:21,267 --> 00:08:23,069 and I'm here to countersue her for fixing 268 00:08:23,069 --> 00:08:24,370 her credit for $5,000. 269 00:08:24,370 --> 00:08:27,006 And I'm not motioning nothing over there. 270 00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:28,040 - Ooh. 271 00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:30,710 You did 55 hours worth of work? 272 00:08:30,710 --> 00:08:31,911 - Yes, ma'am. 273 00:08:31,911 --> 00:08:34,147 It was, like, eight or nine motions. 274 00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:36,048 - How many years did that take you? 275 00:08:36,048 --> 00:08:38,518 - It took me four days. 276 00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:41,988 I slept maybe one hour, two hours here and there. 277 00:08:41,988 --> 00:08:43,456 - Bullshit. [laughter] 278 00:08:43,456 --> 00:08:44,991 - I can prove my point. 279 00:08:44,991 --> 00:08:46,492 - Oh, and I will prove mine, sweetheart. 280 00:08:46,492 --> 00:08:48,227 Let's go. - Let me back this up. 281 00:08:48,227 --> 00:08:49,729 - Mm-hmm. - Y'all some firecrackers. 282 00:08:49,729 --> 00:08:50,863 - Yeah, I'm a rocket launcher. 283 00:08:50,863 --> 00:08:52,365 [laughter] 284 00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:53,366 - Damn! 285 00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:54,367 - How did y'all meet? 286 00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:55,735 Please don't tell me at church. 287 00:08:55,735 --> 00:08:58,171 - I met She some years ago in Club Fed. 288 00:08:58,171 --> 00:08:59,405 - The federal penitentiary. 289 00:08:59,405 --> 00:09:00,473 - Come on, now. 290 00:09:00,473 --> 00:09:01,474 - Oh! 291 00:09:01,474 --> 00:09:02,875 Oh-ho-ho. 292 00:09:02,875 --> 00:09:05,011 For what, may I ask? 293 00:09:05,011 --> 00:09:06,712 - Things that I shouldn't have been doing. 294 00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:09,148 - You didn't go to jail for being this fake lawyer thing, 295 00:09:09,148 --> 00:09:10,550 right? - No, not at all. 296 00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:12,218 - Did you start studying after you went in? 297 00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:14,387 - No, I started studying before I went in. 298 00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:15,388 - Oh, you was getting ready? 299 00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:16,489 - Yeah. 300 00:09:16,489 --> 00:09:18,024 [laughter] 301 00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:21,027 - In what, Sheshe? 302 00:09:21,027 --> 00:09:22,628 - Dope. 303 00:09:22,628 --> 00:09:25,231 Rush it right out. 304 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,099 Point-blank, period. 305 00:09:27,099 --> 00:09:28,835 - Wow. 306 00:09:28,835 --> 00:09:29,869 - Rocket launcher. 307 00:09:29,869 --> 00:09:31,337 - Yo. 308 00:09:31,337 --> 00:09:35,107 I have a feeling right or wrong, she ain't paying shit. 309 00:09:35,107 --> 00:09:37,543 - So how much did you charge her per hour? 310 00:09:37,543 --> 00:09:40,546 - Listen, when you have a legal typist to type this up, 311 00:09:40,546 --> 00:09:41,914 they charge you $3 a minute. 312 00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:42,982 - Oh. 313 00:09:42,982 --> 00:09:47,453 - I charged her a $1.50 per minute. 314 00:09:47,453 --> 00:09:49,555 - And you spent 55 hours? 315 00:09:49,555 --> 00:09:50,656 - Yes, ma'am. 316 00:09:50,656 --> 00:09:51,724 - Ha! 317 00:09:51,724 --> 00:09:53,059 - Sheshe, did you know that she was 318 00:09:53,059 --> 00:09:55,628 charging you $1.50 per minute? 319 00:09:55,628 --> 00:09:58,698 - I told her, OK. 320 00:09:58,698 --> 00:10:02,401 When she text me [indistinct], I said, OK. 321 00:10:02,401 --> 00:10:03,402 - OK. 322 00:10:03,402 --> 00:10:04,670 I like that. 323 00:10:04,670 --> 00:10:05,905 - Do you have proof that she agreed to-- 324 00:10:05,905 --> 00:10:07,006 - Yes. Yes, ma'am. 325 00:10:07,006 --> 00:10:08,107 I do have proof. 326 00:10:08,107 --> 00:10:09,108 - Mm. 327 00:10:09,108 --> 00:10:10,610 - You wanted it done. 328 00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:13,713 - So, "Do u know anyone that can type up motions asap?" 329 00:10:13,713 --> 00:10:16,015 "Most legal typist would charge $3 per minute 330 00:10:16,015 --> 00:10:18,284 "but I also type motion. 331 00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,286 "But I looked at everything you sent, 332 00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:22,688 "and I will only charge you $1.50 333 00:10:22,688 --> 00:10:24,223 a minute to do it for you." 334 00:10:24,223 --> 00:10:26,292 - I want to say something, but I'm scared. 335 00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:28,461 [laughter] 336 00:10:29,729 --> 00:10:30,730 OK, OK. 337 00:10:30,730 --> 00:10:33,766 [laughter] 338 00:10:35,234 --> 00:10:36,669 - Did you pay her anything? 339 00:10:36,669 --> 00:10:38,571 - I think she did $1,000 of work. 340 00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:40,606 I gave her $1,000, and that's all she getting. 341 00:10:40,606 --> 00:10:42,608 - So she's suing you for $4,000, OK? 342 00:10:42,608 --> 00:10:45,244 - And I'm suing her for $5,000, so she owe me a rat for fixing 343 00:10:45,244 --> 00:10:47,713 her credit from 577 to 805. 344 00:10:47,713 --> 00:10:48,781 - May I say something? 345 00:10:48,781 --> 00:10:50,349 - No, because she talking to me. 346 00:10:50,349 --> 00:10:53,486 Her grandson went to a prom in a Lamborghini 347 00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:56,088 on one of the credit cards that she got from my help. 348 00:10:56,088 --> 00:10:57,557 - I'm about to start kicking it with y'all. 349 00:10:57,557 --> 00:10:59,058 - I'm telling you! 350 00:10:59,058 --> 00:11:02,595 - Y'all the most successful ex-convicts I've ever met. 351 00:11:02,595 --> 00:11:03,796 - That's a lie. I am. 352 00:11:03,796 --> 00:11:04,797 - I'm so sorry. 353 00:11:04,797 --> 00:11:06,032 - That's right, Ms. Pat. 354 00:11:06,032 --> 00:11:08,034 [laughter] 355 00:11:09,135 --> 00:11:11,270 - She gave me the program. 356 00:11:11,270 --> 00:11:12,605 - You didn't know what she was doing, 357 00:11:12,605 --> 00:11:13,773 and I told you what to do. 358 00:11:13,773 --> 00:11:15,741 So I did do the work. 359 00:11:15,741 --> 00:11:17,843 - Did you ever expect money from her before she 360 00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:19,211 asked you for this money? 361 00:11:19,211 --> 00:11:21,013 - No, because I thought we were better than that. 362 00:11:21,013 --> 00:11:23,983 But now I see we ain't, so now I want my shit, too. 363 00:11:23,983 --> 00:11:26,452 - Y'all, this is me in 40 years. 364 00:11:26,452 --> 00:11:28,521 [laughter] 365 00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:30,256 OK, Karlous, help me out. 366 00:11:30,256 --> 00:11:31,257 - I agree with Sheshe. 367 00:11:31,257 --> 00:11:33,192 - Me, too. 368 00:11:33,192 --> 00:11:35,361 - You can have all the friends in the world, 369 00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,997 but it's a very rare occasion when you meet 370 00:11:37,997 --> 00:11:39,498 somebody that can fix credit. 371 00:11:39,498 --> 00:11:40,967 That's somebody you need-- 372 00:11:40,967 --> 00:11:42,501 that's real. 373 00:11:42,501 --> 00:11:44,804 If Sheshe needs some papers typed, 374 00:11:44,804 --> 00:11:48,207 she get her papers typed. 375 00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:50,242 - Crystal, is there anything you want to say 376 00:11:50,242 --> 00:11:51,744 that can help your case? 377 00:11:51,744 --> 00:11:54,914 - Your Honor, I love my friend. 378 00:11:54,914 --> 00:11:56,549 I've always loved her. 379 00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,084 I respect her. 380 00:11:58,084 --> 00:12:00,720 And whether she accept me or not, 381 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:01,988 that's going to be my dawg. 382 00:12:01,988 --> 00:12:03,456 - And what do you have to say? 383 00:12:03,456 --> 00:12:05,992 - She needs the money, and I'm not giving it to her. 384 00:12:05,992 --> 00:12:08,861 [laughter] 385 00:12:10,196 --> 00:12:12,231 - OK. OK. All right. 386 00:12:12,231 --> 00:12:13,966 - Sheshe! 387 00:12:13,966 --> 00:12:16,636 - With that said, I've come to my final decision, 388 00:12:16,636 --> 00:12:19,171 and I'm going to settle this once and for all. 389 00:12:19,171 --> 00:12:20,606 [gavel bangs] 390 00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,476 I'm ruling in favor of-- 391 00:12:23,476 --> 00:12:26,078 [tense music] 392 00:12:26,078 --> 00:12:27,980 the defendant, Sheshe Davis. 393 00:12:27,980 --> 00:12:32,184 Crystal, you are ordered to pay Sheshe $1,000. 394 00:12:32,184 --> 00:12:34,754 She gave you 1,000, but she fixed your credit. 395 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,489 So give it back, and y'all even. 396 00:12:36,489 --> 00:12:37,523 - I like that. 397 00:12:37,523 --> 00:12:38,758 - Me too. - I like that. 398 00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:41,594 - But before you go, y'all old hos 399 00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:42,862 out the federal penitentiary. 400 00:12:42,862 --> 00:12:44,630 [laughter] Come on. 401 00:12:44,630 --> 00:12:45,631 Give them a hug. 402 00:12:45,631 --> 00:12:46,866 That's friendship. 403 00:12:46,866 --> 00:12:47,967 That's it. - Aww. 404 00:12:47,967 --> 00:12:49,602 [applause] 405 00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:52,705 - You are dismissed. 406 00:12:52,705 --> 00:12:55,574 - It reminds me when I was in prison and I met this lady. 407 00:12:55,574 --> 00:12:56,575 Her name was Brenda. 408 00:12:56,575 --> 00:12:57,710 I'll never forget her. 409 00:12:57,710 --> 00:12:59,278 She was so educated, but I could tell 410 00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:01,113 she had never been to jail. 411 00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:03,482 And so I immediately hooked up with her. 412 00:13:03,482 --> 00:13:05,117 I learned a lot from that. 413 00:13:05,117 --> 00:13:06,752 And I think about her all the time 414 00:13:06,752 --> 00:13:09,355 because I know I saved her. 415 00:13:09,355 --> 00:13:11,624 And in some ways, she saved me. 416 00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,225 - Wow. 417 00:13:13,225 --> 00:13:14,927 - All right, bailiff, next case. 418 00:13:14,927 --> 00:13:16,529 - That case was a hot mess. 419 00:13:16,529 --> 00:13:17,563 It was leaning. 420 00:13:17,563 --> 00:13:19,065 All I want is my money back. 421 00:13:19,065 --> 00:13:21,467 - She's the baby girl of the family, and she is rotten. 422 00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:22,702 - I beg your pardon? 423 00:13:22,702 --> 00:13:24,003 - Yeah, y'all rotten. 424 00:13:24,003 --> 00:13:25,805 - That's not true. That is a myth. 425 00:13:28,408 --> 00:13:29,942 - How you doing, jury? - Hey. 426 00:13:29,942 --> 00:13:31,377 - Hi, boo. 427 00:13:31,377 --> 00:13:33,146 - I hope you're not feeling hung today. 428 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:35,615 - I'd be hung every day. 429 00:13:35,615 --> 00:13:36,783 - Get it started. 430 00:13:36,783 --> 00:13:38,751 I am so tired of Karlous hitting on me. 431 00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:40,953 [laughter] 432 00:13:41,788 --> 00:13:43,489 - All right, bailiff. Get to bailiffin'. 433 00:13:43,489 --> 00:13:47,593 - This is the case of Montgomery versus Fletcher. 434 00:13:47,593 --> 00:13:49,228 You may now enter. 435 00:13:49,228 --> 00:13:51,998 - Plaintiff Carol Montgomery is suing her sister April 436 00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:55,435 for $475 after she claims the wedding 437 00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:58,671 cake April made for her big day was a giant flop. 438 00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:00,973 Defendant April Fletcher says her sister's 439 00:14:00,973 --> 00:14:02,709 complaints are half-baked. 440 00:14:02,709 --> 00:14:07,280 The cake was a hit, and this bridezilla needs to chill out. 441 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:09,115 - OK, Carol, tell me why we're here today. 442 00:14:09,115 --> 00:14:11,684 - Well, Your Honor, I'm here to sue my sister. 443 00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:14,987 I paid my sister $475 for my wedding cake, 444 00:14:14,987 --> 00:14:16,622 and the cake was a hot mess. 445 00:14:16,622 --> 00:14:17,690 It was leaning. 446 00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:19,425 And all I want is my money back, 447 00:14:19,425 --> 00:14:21,160 or either she can make my cake. It's up to her. 448 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:22,628 - Mm. 449 00:14:22,628 --> 00:14:24,097 - All right, let me hear your side of the story, April. 450 00:14:24,097 --> 00:14:25,431 - I don't even know why I'm here. 451 00:14:25,431 --> 00:14:26,999 Because I told her I didn't want to do 452 00:14:26,999 --> 00:14:28,368 the cake in the first place. 453 00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:30,470 I just wanted to stand there beside my sister 454 00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:31,504 and be happy for her. 455 00:14:31,504 --> 00:14:33,172 I was happy. 456 00:14:33,172 --> 00:14:35,875 But she basically told me I was going to make her wedding cake. 457 00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:38,778 I gave my sister what she wanted, and that's that. 458 00:14:38,778 --> 00:14:40,113 Here we are. 459 00:14:40,113 --> 00:14:41,447 - How much did you charge her for the cake? 460 00:14:41,447 --> 00:14:43,216 - She quoted her own price, because my cakes 461 00:14:43,216 --> 00:14:44,650 start off at $800 and up. 462 00:14:44,650 --> 00:14:46,352 So she quoted her own price-- - Oh, my god. 463 00:14:46,352 --> 00:14:47,720 - --paid me what she wanted to pay me. 464 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:48,855 - Oh, my god. 465 00:14:48,855 --> 00:14:50,690 I paid $475 for my wedding cake. 466 00:14:50,690 --> 00:14:52,158 - She is spoiled. 467 00:14:52,158 --> 00:14:54,327 She's the baby girl of the family, and she is rotten. 468 00:14:54,327 --> 00:14:55,395 - I beg your pardon? 469 00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:56,763 - Yeah, y'all rotten. 470 00:14:56,763 --> 00:14:59,065 Y'all rotten. 471 00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:00,366 - That' not true. 472 00:15:00,366 --> 00:15:02,001 That is a myth. - Thank you. 473 00:15:02,001 --> 00:15:03,569 Your Honor, it's the principle. - OK. 474 00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:05,438 Did you have an inspiration that you can give-- 475 00:15:05,438 --> 00:15:06,773 - Yes, ma'am, I sure do. 476 00:15:06,773 --> 00:15:08,007 - And do you have-- 477 00:15:08,007 --> 00:15:09,876 - This is what I sent her. 478 00:15:09,876 --> 00:15:11,611 - This is what you asked for? - Yes, ma'am. 479 00:15:11,611 --> 00:15:12,979 Three-tier cake. Yes, I did. 480 00:15:12,979 --> 00:15:14,847 - OK, let me see what you got. - What you get? 481 00:15:14,847 --> 00:15:16,215 - Oh. 482 00:15:16,215 --> 00:15:18,050 - Well, first of all, Your Honor, the cake seemed-- 483 00:15:18,050 --> 00:15:20,086 it was still, like, lukewarm. 484 00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:22,422 So therefore, the thing was gangsta-leaning. 485 00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:24,357 So when she brought it and set it on the table, 486 00:15:24,357 --> 00:15:26,125 I scooted my husband back, and I look. 487 00:15:26,125 --> 00:15:28,494 I'm leaning with the cake. 488 00:15:28,494 --> 00:15:30,730 And it was missing some icing, too, on top of that. 489 00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:33,032 - Oh, I do see that Leaning Tower of Pisa. 490 00:15:33,032 --> 00:15:35,268 - That's because I did the video like this. 491 00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:37,003 I'm not even trying to hear all that. 492 00:15:37,003 --> 00:15:39,238 - Did you know it wasn't like some of your best work? 493 00:15:39,238 --> 00:15:40,239 Just asking. 494 00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:41,407 - I know what I'm doing. 495 00:15:41,407 --> 00:15:42,875 I even have a replica of the cake. 496 00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:43,876 - You got a what? 497 00:15:43,876 --> 00:15:45,111 We have that here? 498 00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:46,112 - She's got one. 499 00:15:46,112 --> 00:15:47,113 She's coming in with it now. 500 00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:48,815 - Don't look shit mine. 501 00:15:48,815 --> 00:15:50,249 [laughter] 502 00:15:50,249 --> 00:15:51,417 - Did it taste good? 503 00:15:51,417 --> 00:15:52,418 - I ain't going to lie. 504 00:15:52,418 --> 00:15:53,619 It was delicious. 505 00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:55,087 - Everybody else in the reception 506 00:15:55,087 --> 00:15:57,390 said that the cake was beautiful and it tasted good. 507 00:15:57,390 --> 00:15:59,592 She literally only had two slices of the bottom tier left 508 00:15:59,592 --> 00:16:00,827 and the top tier. 509 00:16:00,827 --> 00:16:01,828 That was all that was left. 510 00:16:01,828 --> 00:16:02,995 - No, ma'am. 511 00:16:02,995 --> 00:16:04,163 The top layer was stolen. - Stolen? 512 00:16:04,163 --> 00:16:05,832 - Yes, ma'am. - Wait a minute! 513 00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:07,533 Wait a minute! - Who stole the cake? 514 00:16:09,736 --> 00:16:12,639 - Plaintiff Carol Montgomery is suing her sister April 515 00:16:12,639 --> 00:16:16,776 for $475, the price she paid her to bake what ended up 516 00:16:16,776 --> 00:16:18,545 being a busted wedding cake. 517 00:16:18,545 --> 00:16:21,247 But April says her cake was flawless, 518 00:16:21,247 --> 00:16:23,483 and Carol needs to take her frosty attitude 519 00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:25,251 somewhere else. 520 00:16:25,251 --> 00:16:27,287 Ms. Pat's about to settle it. 521 00:16:27,287 --> 00:16:28,488 - Did it taste good? 522 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:29,956 - Everybody else in the reception 523 00:16:29,956 --> 00:16:32,158 said that the cake was beautiful and it tasted good. 524 00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:34,427 She literally only had two slices of the bottom tier 525 00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:35,695 left and the top tier. 526 00:16:35,695 --> 00:16:37,497 That was all that was left. - No, ma'am. 527 00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:38,498 The top layer was stolen. 528 00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:39,999 - Stolen? 529 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:41,134 Who stole the cake? 530 00:16:41,134 --> 00:16:42,469 - Her ex-boyfriend. - Wait a minute! 531 00:16:42,469 --> 00:16:44,304 Wait a minute! - That's what I was on there. 532 00:16:44,304 --> 00:16:45,372 - Stop the press. 533 00:16:45,372 --> 00:16:47,340 - I was really hurt overall. 534 00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:48,875 That's why we kind of, like, been 535 00:16:48,875 --> 00:16:51,311 bumping heads for the past 2 and 1/2 years about my cake. 536 00:16:51,311 --> 00:16:53,446 - How in the hell did your ex-boyfriend 537 00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:55,215 steal the top of the cake? 538 00:16:55,215 --> 00:16:58,385 - This joker took my whole top layer when I clearly told him, 539 00:16:58,385 --> 00:17:00,053 don't touch the top layer. 540 00:17:00,053 --> 00:17:02,355 - It's a mistrial. 541 00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:03,623 - Sit down, Karlous. 542 00:17:03,623 --> 00:17:05,892 - Oh. 543 00:17:05,892 --> 00:17:09,329 - He apologized, and he paid. 544 00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:11,531 You accepted the money and the apology. 545 00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:13,800 - Because she told me that's what I had to do, Your Honor. 546 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,301 She said, well, you gonna take the-- the $75. 547 00:17:15,301 --> 00:17:16,469 - You are a grown woman. 548 00:17:16,469 --> 00:17:18,104 - I said, no. 549 00:17:18,104 --> 00:17:20,673 The whole principle was the top layer is for the bride 550 00:17:20,673 --> 00:17:22,275 and the groom, Your Honor. 551 00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:24,010 - Did you ever ask your sister for a refund? 552 00:17:24,010 --> 00:17:25,545 - I did. She told me to kiss her ass. 553 00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:26,846 - Oh, wow. 554 00:17:26,846 --> 00:17:27,881 - If y'all would've known the hell 555 00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:28,982 that I have been through with this 556 00:17:28,982 --> 00:17:30,784 little girl about this cake. 557 00:17:30,784 --> 00:17:31,985 - That is lies. 558 00:17:31,985 --> 00:17:34,087 - OK, jury, what y'all think about this? 559 00:17:34,087 --> 00:17:37,357 - Now, did I hear that your ex gave her $75 for the top 560 00:17:37,357 --> 00:17:38,725 of the cake that he ate? 561 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:39,959 - Yeah, he paid for the top tier that he ate. 562 00:17:39,959 --> 00:17:41,828 - He sent that, but I asked for the cake. 563 00:17:41,828 --> 00:17:44,397 - I think as sisters, sometimes we take the fact that we're 564 00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:47,200 sisters for granted, but this is when sisters are supposed 565 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:48,635 to show up for each other. 566 00:17:48,635 --> 00:17:51,704 - Carol, any final words before I go make my decision? 567 00:17:51,704 --> 00:17:53,540 - If there was another customer, they would have got-- 568 00:17:53,540 --> 00:17:55,575 either they half-refund or their cake remade. 569 00:17:55,575 --> 00:17:58,111 - All right, any final words before I go make my decision? 570 00:17:58,111 --> 00:18:01,047 - Well, I do feel that I was taking advantage of. 571 00:18:01,047 --> 00:18:02,515 And it hurts my feelings for her to be like, oh, 572 00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:04,117 this cake was gangsta-leaning. I was leaning with it. 573 00:18:04,117 --> 00:18:05,685 No, that's not how that cake was. 574 00:18:05,685 --> 00:18:06,886 - OK. All right. 575 00:18:06,886 --> 00:18:09,355 Well, I know how important a wedding is. 576 00:18:09,355 --> 00:18:11,524 I've been married for over 30-some years. 577 00:18:11,524 --> 00:18:12,926 But we didn't get a cake. 578 00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:15,195 We went to the courthouse and went to Burger King. 579 00:18:15,195 --> 00:18:16,729 [laughter] 580 00:18:16,729 --> 00:18:19,365 With that said, I've come to my final decision, 581 00:18:19,365 --> 00:18:20,767 and I'm ready to settle it. 582 00:18:20,767 --> 00:18:23,203 [gavel bangs] 583 00:18:23,203 --> 00:18:24,671 I'm ruling in favor of-- 584 00:18:24,671 --> 00:18:27,640 [tense music] 585 00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:30,777 the plaintiff, Carol. 586 00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:34,514 April, you're ordered to pay Carol $475. 587 00:18:34,514 --> 00:18:36,883 Because I want you to put this behind 588 00:18:36,883 --> 00:18:41,588 y'all and heal whatever that is that is keeping y'all apart. 589 00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:43,456 Because that's your sister. 590 00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:46,826 My sister have been on crack since my childhood. 591 00:18:46,826 --> 00:18:49,696 Every time I go down Moreland, there's my sister 592 00:18:49,696 --> 00:18:50,797 selling [bleep]. 593 00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:51,831 - That's your sister? 594 00:18:51,831 --> 00:18:54,100 [laughter] 595 00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:57,403 What? It is a small world. 596 00:18:57,403 --> 00:18:58,972 [laughter] 597 00:18:58,972 --> 00:19:00,373 - Shut up, Karlous! 598 00:19:00,373 --> 00:19:02,876 [laughter] 599 00:19:02,876 --> 00:19:04,077 You're making me hot. 600 00:19:04,077 --> 00:19:07,280 Would you please shut the [bleep] up? 601 00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:08,748 - Wow. 602 00:19:08,748 --> 00:19:10,984 - I want y'all to start to heal this relationship, 603 00:19:10,984 --> 00:19:12,151 because you family. 604 00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:13,152 - Got you. 605 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:15,455 - With that, I just settled it. 606 00:19:15,455 --> 00:19:16,923 Now get out of my court. - Thank you, Your Honor. 607 00:19:16,923 --> 00:19:18,358 - Thank you. - You are dismissed. 608 00:19:18,358 --> 00:19:19,759 - All right. Come on, bailiff. 609 00:19:19,759 --> 00:19:20,827 Let's get to bailiffin'. 610 00:19:22,696 --> 00:19:23,830 - Next time on "Ms. Pat Settles It"-- 611 00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:25,265 - We got her Toyota Camry fixed, 612 00:19:25,265 --> 00:19:26,700 but she agreed to pay us back. 613 00:19:26,700 --> 00:19:30,170 - You rode to court with your mama to sue your mama? 614 00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:31,605 [laughter] 615 00:19:31,605 --> 00:19:34,174 - My friend here, she kicked me out in seven days. 616 00:19:34,174 --> 00:19:35,576 - What did she do? 617 00:19:35,576 --> 00:19:38,412 - Big Mama had slid her hand at the small of my back. 618 00:19:38,412 --> 00:19:39,513 - That's your spot. 619 00:19:39,513 --> 00:19:40,781 - But she don't need to be there. 620 00:19:40,781 --> 00:19:42,516 [laughter] 621 00:19:42,516 --> 00:19:43,984 - My cousin used up all the hot water, 622 00:19:43,984 --> 00:19:45,252 and the water heater broke. 623 00:19:45,252 --> 00:19:47,054 He was going to get Crackhead Joe to fix it. 624 00:19:47,054 --> 00:19:48,221 - My sister smoke crack. 625 00:19:48,221 --> 00:19:49,690 She can't put in no hot water heater. 626 00:19:49,690 --> 00:19:51,258 - You sold crack. You know they can't. 627 00:19:51,258 --> 00:19:52,459 - You don't know shit about me. 628 00:19:52,459 --> 00:19:54,561 [laughter]