- You ain't never met a judge like me.
- Your Honor, Your Honor!
- Shut the hell up, and let me get this thing together.
Hey, y'all. I'm Ms. Pat.
I know the inside of a courtroom.
I went to jail for selling cocaine.
Now here I am, sitting on this side of the bench.
- Put my faith in your hands.
- I ain't God. I don't love you.
These are real cases
with real money on the line.
What you do with the $5,000?
- I-I'll let you know.
- Well, I'm here. Let me know.
- Let's just wrap this up
'cause I'm getting very irritated.
- You keep running your mouth,
you ain't gonna get nothing.
Court is now in session.
Baby, don't do me, do Jesus,
'cause he got more patience with you, okay?
[gavel bangs]
[intriguing music]
- This is the only judge
that'll bust a cap in your ass
and take you to the hospital.
All rise for The Honorable Ms. Pat.
♪ ♪
- Y'all can have a seat.
How y'all doing today, jury?
- Doing well. - Good.
- Y'all ready to do it?
- We are ready. - Yes.
- Bring 'em in. Guilty!
[laughter] - All right, bailiff, go ahead.
She said everybody guilty.
- This is the case of Pierce versus Adame.
- Plaintiff Decembre Pierce is suing her employee, Jackie,
for $2,500.
She loaned her the money
to get a car and driver's license,
but Jackie decided to start a pottery career instead.
Defendant Jackie Adame says
that she doesn't owe Decembre a dime.
She works five jobs for Decembre
and gets paid squat.
Plus pottery is her dream,
and this money is making her dreams come true.
- Before we get started, I just want to let you know
this is a jury of my peers, OK?
Don't even look over there.
Their opinions ain't worth shit, OK?
All right, Decembre, tell me why we're here.
- I'm here today because I am suing
my best friend/roommate/ HR director/nanny/translator
for $2,500
because she borrowed it in January of 2022.
She promised to pay it back in six months,
and I still do not have my money.
- Why did you loan her the money?
- She wanted to get her driver's license
and take a class to learn how to drive
and do what she needs to do to get a car.
I have a promissory note where she said
if she doesn't pay it back in six months,
I can whip her ass.
And I'm gonna do that if I don't get my money back.
- Ooh. - Oh, no.
- Now wait a minute.
- Who writes that down?
- She do five different jobs for you?
- Yes, ma'am. - So why the hell
does she owe you anything?
She got five different positions.
- She owes me because she does not pay rent.
She lives with me.
No water bill. No light bill.
- She working for rent because you don't pay her.
- Well, I started a new business,
a security business--
- Well, damn, she doing that, too?
- No-- [laughs]
She is the HR director for it.
- She's security for the kids.
- OK, Jackie, please tell me your side of the story.
- I did say I was gonna pay her back.
- Mm-hmm. - But out of everything
that I've done for her,
I think that I should be suing her
for double the amount.
- Let me ask you a question.
Is she a good employee? - She is.
- I'm the employee.
I do every single-- [laughter]
I do every single thing.
I've been living with her for two years,
doing everything.
I'm her right hand.
She wouldn't be anything without me.
- She the only employee. - The only employee.
- Do you pay her a weekly salary?
- We get paid biweekly.
- How much is it?
- It ranges.
- Oh, don't range me, girl.
- OK, so about $500 every two weeks.
- Every two weeks? - Damn.
- What do you do?
- I take care of her.
And I even Uber her everywhere she wants to go--
when she wants to go out with her friends,
when she wants to hang out.
She didn't even take the money to get
the driver's license class or to get the car.
- What did she do--what did you do with the money, Jackie?
- So what happened was...
- Uh-oh. - I thought about it.
I was like, you know what?
I can double this money.
- How was you planning to use this money, at a casino?
How was you planning to double it?
- I wanted to start my own business.
- Doing what?
- Doing pottery.
- Are you good at pottery?
- Yes, I am, actually.
For a beginner, I am.
- Can I see some? - Yes, please,
look at this pottery.
And I even have-- - Oh. [chuckles]
- I even have the promissory note.
- Don't look at it like that.
[laughter]
- This is a piece of bread.
- That's supposed to be a waffle coaster,
like a tic-tac-toe-- - I thought it was
a tic-tac-toe game. - Yeah!
- Oh, see, I have an eye.
- Have you sold any of this pottery?
- Mm-mm. - Hell no.
- No, I haven't 'cause--
- She can't even give it away. - When I was showing her,
she was like, what the [bleep] is this?
[laughter]
Well, she just killed my dreams right there and then.
- That's the best thing she did for you.
She kept it real with you.
- She a dream killer.
- Did you ever have a contract with her?
- Yes, I do. It's in my evidence.
She wrote it. - All right--
- This is a promissory note. - Your Honor--
- Yeah. - That don't--
it's not valid.
I'ma tell you right now, it's not valid.
- It say, "I'm Jackie Adame, promise to pay back
"Decembre Pierce $2,500.
"If I do not pay back in time,
"she can whip my ass and sue me.
"Just playing about the ass whipping.
"Well, the suing, too,
but yeah, I'm gonna pay you back."
- And look where we at right now.
- Why do you say this isn't valid?
- I don't remember signing that.
I was probably under the influence.
- [laughs] - I don't care if you was
up under the influence of marijuana,
chicken and waffle, wine-- I don't care.
You said you was gonna go get a car.
You didn't borrow this lady's $2,500
to make these ugly-ass plates.
- Thank you.
- Why you gotta do me like that?
- I'ma always keep it real with you, Jackie.
- I know, but-- - Hey!
I'm not your friend.
- OK. - Ooh.
- All right, jury, I need y'all help.
- What I'm seeing now is, no one's really putting a price
on the things that they do for each other
since y'all are charging.
You need to apply a price
to what you think your worth is
for the things you're doing individually for her.
If she does not want to pay that, somebody will.
I just lost an assistant.
[laughter]
- Can I say one more thing?
- Hell no!
[laughter] - OK.
- I'm gonna settle this right now.
[suspenseful music]
I'm ruling in favor of...
♪ ♪
The defendant, Jackie.
And let me tell you why.
Literally, you said she was HR, nanny,
translator, assistant, babysitter.
Seven jobs for $500 every two weeks.
You should be ashamed of yourself.
- Period. - It's not right.
- Period.
- Only a selfish person would do this
to a human being.
So y'all get out of my damn courtroom.
I settled it.
[applause] - You are dismissed.
- Man.
- Treat people the way you want to be treated.
Life is too short to be an asshole
because karma is a mother[bleep],
and it will come back to get you.
- Carmen? What I got to do with this?
- Karma. [laughter]
- Karma. - She'll get you, too.
- Same thing.
- She'll steal your identity.
[laughs]
If you see a roach, there will be no rent.
- We got a written contract.
- I got a GED. I can read, sir.
- And that's great. I'm glad you can.
- Whoa.
Who do you think I am, him?
I done heard enough of this.
[intriguing music]
- All right, jury, let's have some fun.
Y'all ready? - Yeah.
- Let's do it.
- All right, bailiff, don't keep us waiting.
Do your job.
- Oh, I was just waiting on you.
[laughter]
This is the case of Smith versus Lyles.
- Plaintiff Kenneth Smith is suing his former protégé,
Chris, for $3,000 to cover three months
of unpaid storefront rent.
Defendant Chris Lyles says Kenneth agreed
to take free products until the cockroaches
that inhabited the storefront were evicted.
If the roaches won't pay the rent,
then neither will he.
- OK, Kenneth, tell us why you're here today.
- I'm here today to sue Chris for $3,000 in unpaid rent.
Chris rented space out of my barbershop.
He was agreeing on $1,000 a month,
and he hasn't paid me any of it.
- Mm.
Did you have a lease with him?
- Yes, he signed a contract.
- And what is your relationship to him?
- Me being a barber, I was always cutting his hair.
And it's been around 12 years I've been mentoring him,
and gave him an opportunity
to build his brand in my location.
- Chris, what happened here?
- Well, pretty much, I'm here today--
- We know you're here today. - Yeah.
All right, well, I'm here because I have a clothing brand
by the name of True to Hustle.
- True to Hustle? - True to Hustle
because I'm true to my hustle, yes, ma'am.
Kenneth is suing me over unpaid rent.
But when my customers coming in,
and they see a roach and then odor--
it had mold too.
Like, me being the man I am,
I'm not gonna just complain about every little thing.
- Roaches will live anywhere.
They like free rent like you do.
[laughter]
- I don't even play like that.
Nah, hell nah.
- How many roaches did you see?
- At least eight roaches. - Eight?
- That's, like, when I walk through the door.
- They was welcoming you.
Do you have any pictures of your roaches
that welcome you at the door?
- Yeah, they was welcoming.
- Is that a roach?
- Can we zoom in? - That's the roach.
- Hold on. - Can we zoom in?
Because that look like a part of the floor.
- Can I ask you something?
- What is it, Ray J?
- Can I walk up to the screen
and just put my glasses on?
Then I can-- - Sure you can, Ray J.
- Thank you. - Let us know what it is
when you come back.
- Let me just get up here and see.
[soft laughter]
I've made my judgment.
- [laughing]
These pictures don't look too bad.
I mean, I see a little--
I see a little spiderwebs here and there,
but these don't look like roaches.
These look like ladybugs.
- I reached out to him. I texted him.
I said, I can't work like this, brother, like,
knowing that I gave him $1,000 deposit.
So I sent him pictures of the roaches.
And I was like, hey, man, can I just give you
free clothing or whatever till you fix this?
And he was like, yeah, that's cool with me, man.
We could do that. - Chris, do you have
any proof of this conversation?
- I do. I do have proof of it on my messages.
- Oh, here it is right here.
It says here, "What's up, Chris?
"I just wanted to say again,
"I appreciate you stopping by the shop
"so that we could clear things up
"with regards to the bugs and the pests.
"I already reached out to a few exterminators.
"Someone should be getting back to you ASAP.
"As we discussed, until everything is rectified,
I'll hold off on the monthly payment."
Well, he texted back, "I really appreciate that, Lee.
"Man, again, thank you, and I'll continue
"to give you free clothing like we agreed
until all these issues are fixed."
- Ooh. - So we gonna go
based off a text message... - Plot twist.
- Versus the contract? - Plot twist.
- Wait a minute. - We got a written contract.
All that text message-- - Oh, you might have
a written contract... - Nah, don't do that.
- But a text message is a written contract, too.
- That's just saying that-- - Chris, did you give this man
the clothes?
- I gave him clothes every Friday.
- Just said right here,
if he see a roach, there will be no rent.
You did agree to it. - I agreed
for one day, and I got the Raid--
- It didn't say one day right here.
- No, but I'm saying I got it.
- I got a GED. I can read, sir.
- And that's great. I'm glad you can.
- Whoa.
Who do you think I am, him?
You amended the thing in a text message.
- How much though? - You said,
until you get the roaches gone.
- But you didn't see no roaches on--
- I saw something with more legs than me,
and I ain't got but two, sir.
[laughter]
Can we see the clothes that-- - Yeah, we can see 'em.
Let's see because you will see what I'm talking about.
- Oh, OK.
- Look at that. That orange leather,
that black varsity coat.
Look at them.
That's top material right there.
- Did you say they were leather?
- That's the real one. I'm telling you.
- You sure this ain't balloon material?
- Nah, it ain't no balloon material.
It's the real one.
- The real bullshit.
OK. Hang that back up.
[laughter]
- That was fair. - A'ight.
I done heard enough of this.
Ray J, what you think?
- The contract is one thing,
but the text message is binding.
How many weeks did you give him clothes?
- Every week until he kicked me out.
- And how long was that?
- I was there for three months.
- It sounds like, in that text message,
it told it all.
I just want to know, can I get
the little blue outfit in a size extra large
'cause--I'ma call you.
- Girl, go ahead and make it two.
[laughter]
- OK, let me settle this for once and for all.
[suspenseful music]
I'm gonna rule in favor of...
♪ ♪
The defendant.
I'm not giving either one of you nothing.
First of all, you're supposed to be his mentor.
Why didn't you jump on the bugs the first month?
You said you supported him.
But when he got in your spot, you abandoned him.
And then you took his-- - I didn't abandon him.
- No, no, you gonna listen to me, thick neck.
[laughter]
You never handled the situation,
but you wanted him to pay you monthly rent.
If you cannot afford the rent, move your place
and sell out of your house until you can do better.
- No, I-- - I didn't ask you.
Don't you say another thing.
[laughter]
Both of you need to get
out of my courtroom right now.
Ray J, would you--which one of the outfits would you wear?
- Judge, can I get up and try on one?
- Yeah, put on the orange one, Ray J.
This man is taking his pants off.
[laughter]
Order in the court. - I object.
- OK. [laughter]
OK, OK.
OK.
You look like you gonna be in an "Orange Is the New Black."
[laughter]
- To be honest, I thought it was costume jewelry.
I thought it was something that I could buy and replace.
But then when she hit me with the receipt,
I was just like, why would you let me
wear something that valuable?
- Why would you trust me?
- [laughs]
[intriguing music]
- Now, you guys are here for just
more than coffee and donuts, OK?
- Absolutely.
- We got a job to do.
Pay attention.
- Let's do this.
- Bailiff, go and do your thing,
and show 'em why I bought you that ugly suit.
- This is the case of Williams versus Harris.
- Plaintiff Patricia Williams is suing her sister
for $1,500 for a sentimental piece of jewelry
she let her borrow.
Patricia says Crystal lost her bling
and then lied about it for months.
Defendant Crystal Harris says she thought
it was just costume jewelry.
And if it was that important,
Patricia should have made it known
or never let her borrow it.
- Patricia Williams. That's you?
- It is. - That's me too.
- I know. - So let me ask you this
before we get started.
Are you the reason why I'm a convicted felon?
[laughter]
Did you forge them checks
and rob that liquor store in my name?
- I didn't-- - [indistinct]
- I did not do it, Judge. - OK.
So why are you here today, Patricia?
- Well, Judge, today I'm here suing my sister,
Crystal, for $1,500.
I let Crystal borrow a very expensive piece of jewelry
from me, and she lost it.
And I would like my money and an apology.
- All right, Crystal, let me hear your side.
- So I did not know the value of the jewelry.
I always take a piece of her with me when I go onstage.
So to be honest, I thought it was costume jewelry.
I didn't know it was--I thought it was costume jewelry.
I thought it was something that I could buy and replace.
So then when she hit me with the receipt,
I was just like, why would you let me
wear something that valuable?
- Why would you trust me?
[laughter]
- What do you do onstage?
- I'm a comedian.
- Oh, OK. - I do stand-up comedy.
- All right, well, I thought you was a dancer.
I didn't know. [laughter]
- Yeah, I thought she was a dancer too.
- You know, they just opened that big girl club here.
[laughter]
- That might be my next occupation.
[laughter]
- She's a comedian, and I'm a rapper.
- Well, damn, y'all talented.
- Yeah, it runs in the family.
- What did this necklace look like?
Let me see the picture. You got a receipt, too?
- I got the receipt from them.
♪ ♪
- And where did you get these from?
- It was given to me as a gift by my record label
for my accomplishments.
- OK, and that was $1,500?
- Yeah, that piece by itself,
not including the one that says "queen."
- Lenox Mall, OK.
- But I wanted her to feel special.
You know, she's my little sister.
I never expected her to lose it, though.
- When I did my show, it was a big show.
I won, you know, so it was a big celebration for me.
So I took it off because I know how she is about her jewelry.
So once I got settled where I was at,
and I started looking for the bag that I had it in,
and I realized the bag was gone,
that's when I realized it was gone.
And I panicked because I didn't know
how I was gonna tell her that I lost her jewelry.
- What happened the first couple of times
she asked you for it?
- I ignored it and made jokes about it.
- Right. - What was the jokes?
- I was like, you got a direct line with God.
Tell him to give it back to you.
[laughter]
I made jokes out of it because,
until she hit me with the receipt,
I really thought it was, you know, costume jewelry.
So I started looking online
to see how I could get it made,
how I can duplicate it and stuff like that.
- Lubricate it? Lubricate?
- Duplicate. - Duplicate.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm thinking KY Jelly over here.
My bad. My bad.
- So outside of this drama and this jewelry thing,
what's y'all relationship like?
- The bond that me and my sister got
is like two peas in a pod.
We like Ray J and Brandy.
When you see her, you see me.
- Sounds like this is a lot bigger.
- It is. - Well, tell me about it.
- I cannot start because-- - Girl.
- [choking up] She stopped coming to my shows.
- Why?
- 'Cause she's one of my biggest supporters.
- 'Cause you disrespected me that day.
- She's the biggest sup-- - 'Cause you disrespected me.
And all I need is an apology,
and we would be right back where we were.
- But I just wanted a piece of her with me onstage,
'cause every time I go onstage,
and I got a piece of her with me, I win.
So she's like my good luck charm.
- Y'all are some crying-ass bitches.
[laughter]
- Patricia Williams is suing her sister, Crystal Harris,
for $1,500 for losing sentimental jewelry,
and Ms. Pat is about to settle this sister act.
- So why are y'all letting jewelry
come in between your relationship?
- It's the respect factor for me.
If you ask me for something, and I trust you with it,
even if you bring it back broke--
and now she's saying she was panicking.
No, it doesn't-- but when I did talk to you,
you laughed it off and joked about it.
No respect. I'm the bigger sister.
all: Aww.
- All right, jury, come on.
Let me talk to y'all about this.
I don't know what to do about
the gospel rapping sister and the comedian.
- Man, you supposed to have came home
with the saddest story about how you lost her chain,
then she wouldn't even trip.
You didn't even bring a story behind it.
You didn't have no story. That's why she want her money.
You should have had a better story.
- So your legal advice is, she should have lied?
- Yeah, and filed an insurance claim.
Come on, now, you gotta get your money
out here in these streets.
[laughter]
- All right, but when it come down to family,
family is hard to come by.
And it's hard for family to stick together.
You came here for me to settle it,
so I'm gonna settle it.
[suspenseful music]
I'm ruling in favor
of the defendant, Crystal,
because you can replace a necklace,
but you cannot replace a sister.
Now, one thing I do know
is that you walked in this courtroom,
and you showed me that you love her
way more than that damn necklace.
And she's gonna be your sister until you put dirt in her face
or put her in the oven.
- That's deep. That's deep.
- You know, cremation.
- Yeah, I was trying to understand
where the oven came from.
- That's what's important to me.
Now, Patricia Williams with my name,
I am gonna give you $100
so you and your sister can leave here
and go get you a 4 for $4...
[laughter]
- 4 for $4. - 4 for $4.
- And talk that over.
- As long as it can be large.
- Thank you, Your Honor. - Thank you, Your Honor.
- I settled it.
- Bye, y'all. Good luck.
Aww.
[applause]
- You are dismissed. - Good luck with your careers.
- Thank you. Nice to meet y'all.
- [laughing] - That necklace
she just showed me was about as real as Kourtlyn's badge.
[laughter]
- She bought her boyfriend
the car with my money.
- When did your boyfriend buy the car?
- He bought it after he gave me $5,000.
- Aha!
- You signed this, saying that you would pay her $3,000 back.
- After I thought about it, I was like, hold on.
[laughter]
- Had that been Suge Knight,
you probably would have been in a body bag.
[laughter]
- Kayla chose to claim the kids
that I take care of on her taxes.
- Let her fall.
She got a forehead.
[laughter]