- You ain't never met a judge like me.
- Your Honor! Your Honor!
- Shut the hell up and let me get this thing together.
Hey, y'all. I'm Ms. Pat.
I know the inside of a courtroom.
I went to jail for selling cocaine.
Now here I am, sitting on this side of the bench.
- Put my faith in your hands.
- I ain't God. I don't love you.
These are real cases with real money on the line.
What would you do with the $5,000?
- I'll let you know. - Well, I'm here.
Let me know.
- Let's just wrap this up
because I'm getting very irritated.
- You keep running your mouth,
you ain't going to get nothing.
Court is now in session.
Baby, don't do me.
Do Jesus because he got more patience with you, OK?
- I don't care who you think you are,
but when this lady enters the room, everyone must rise.
So please stand for the Honorable Ms. Pat.
[dramatic music]
- OK. - Mm-hmm.
- That's why you don't give your kids no jobs.
Y'all can sit down.
All right, Bailiff. Start bailiffing then.
- This is the case of Doss v. Allison.
You may now enter.
- Plaintiff Marcus Doss is suing his employee
and protégé Terril for $1,500 for months of unpaid booth
rentals at Marcus' hair salon.
But defendant Terril Allison claims that Marcus unfairly
enlists Terril's fabulous hair and makeup skills for salon
events without paying him and is countersuing
his boss for $1,450.
♪ ♪
- All right, well, Marcus, tell us why we're here.
- I am here because I want $760 for back-paid booth rent.
- How much is his booth rent, sir?
- 190 a week.
- OK.
How many weeks did he miss?
- Four weeks.
- So $760 for the booth rental.
- And I want $740 in pain and suffering.
- So you want the other part for pain and suffering.
- Yes, ma'am.
Because while nobody's paying booth rent,
guess who it falls on.
- You. - The owner.
- Have you suffered? - Yes, ma'am.
- How? - This suit is tight.
I couldn't even buy a new suit to come here because I had
to get this old-ass suit out of the closet
because I ain't had no money to buy
a new suit to come here today.
- It is a little snug. - Hold on, wait a minute.
- I'm just saying.
- [laughs]
- Do he come to work this fabulous?
- Baby, crop tops.
Everybody talk about his butt.
He coming in, that be out.
- Who wants his butt?
- We do old ladies' hair.
They be talking about some Terril butt.
- Can we see the butt? - Where do y'all want me to go?
- Come on, let's see. Turn around right here.
Turn around. - [laughs]
- OK. All right.
OK. All right.
- Baby, baby. - We just were--
- You thick in the front and the back.
- [laughs] In the back blessed, double blessed.
- You want to tell me what's going on over there, Terril?
- Yes, ma'am. I'm disputing these charges.
I don't know where this man is getting these figures
and these numbers from.
I started out when his business was first kicking
off as far as his own salon.
We've had a little disconnect.
I am--I do remain professional,
but sometimes when you are exceeding above them
and what they have done, this thing called
jealousy kind of comes out.
- Ooh!
- So you're saying you're better than him?
- See, I'm a diamond, and he's--this is sequins here.
This is--
- Why is he jealous of you, Terril?
- You know, I'm the new generation
of what he has done.
- He's taken off, but it's not jealousy.
It's like when you know--when you see something in somebody
and you're like, bro--
- Was y'all in a relationship before?
- No.
- Oh, damn.
[laughter]
Y'all sound like the Gap Band.
No!
- The Gap Band.
- Did y'all have any type of agreement?
- Yes, we do.
It wasn't a contract, but I have numbers.
She's talking to me.
I have numbers, ma'am.
- This is a ledger of the missing booth rent, right?
- Yeah, that's handwritten.
- No, that's not.
That is a copy from my manager receipt book.
- Mr. Doss actually owes me money.
If the salon sponsors different things,
I technically am an independent contractor.
- Mm-hmm.
- But he'll come at the last minute
and say, hey, we need you to be here at 8:30
this morning to do this client's makeup for the
Fayetteville Dogwood Festival.
- And you be there.
I ain't say you don't be there.
- Terril wants $1,450 for "The Little Mermaid" photo shoot,
black jacket, red jacket photo shoot, hairstyling, wardrobe,
models, and rehearsal.
- At that time, we were having events going on.
So I'm thinking that--
- You do the events, and it's a swap out.
- Yes, ma'am.
He hosted his own hair show in our hometown.
- Do you have any pictures?
- I do.
I have a video, actually.
- OK.
Well, let's see this video then, baby.
- This is him.
- Yeah.
It's too hot out.
Yeah.
- It was over 98 degrees that day.
I had to do his makeup, be a prop person,
hold his cape when he need me to.
Yes, he did do my makeup, and he did my hair for it,
but it was agreements.
Like you know, like we here.
We all together.
- So y'all really just been swapping services?
- Swapping--
- Mine is on documents. - Services.
- He don't come with his on documents.
So I'm like--
- Well, did you pay this man for this?
- No. [laughs]
- Oh, well.
OK, jury, what y'all think?
Come on, Garrianna.
- Since they're swapping out services,
all he is technically owed is $50.
Because $1,500 from the $1,450 that he was saying--
- $50? That's two drinks.
What's up? What do I do with that?
- Y'all see right through it.
- Marcus, do you have any final comments before I
go and make my decision?
- I would like for you to tell Terril that this
is real life that we live in.
And he thinks he lives on planet Uranus.
I don't know where he stay.
- Uranus?
[laughter]
- In your anus.
- Your anus or Uranus?
- Uranus the planet.
- Not your anus? - No.
- Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
- I'm sorry.
- Thank you.
My point is he is an asset to the salon.
- He's an asset.
- Why did I say that?
- I asked that.
He's an asset?
His asset--his ass sets high.
His ass is set--
- His ass sets here.
- I want to go home!
I want to go home!
- I'm done with you, Marcus.
- I want to--
- Your mind is in the gutter.
- [laughs]
- Terril.
- I hope we can get an understanding.
That way whenever something is done,
we can know that it's trade for trade.
- A contract would be great.
- Yeah, a contract would be great.
- All right.
I've heard everything I needed to hear.
So after considering all the facts of this case,
I'm going to settle it.
[dramatic music]
I'm ruling in the favor of...
the plaintiff.
- That's me?
[laughter]
- But don't get too excited.
I'm only giving you $50.
- Ooh.
- Did I do that?
- Get you two drinks.
- Don't look at me.
- Because he did a service of $1,000.
He did a service of $450.
You were suing him for $1,500.
Garrianna did the math for her mama
because she know I got a GED.
That leaves you $50.
So I'm going to give you $50 and some advice, Marcus.
Look me in my eyes.
- Yes, ma'am.
- Let him fly because he fly as hell.
- Yes, yes.
- I'll take that.
- So there you go. - Yes, ma'am.
- I just settled it.
- Thank you, jury.
- You are dismissed.
- Thank you all so much.
- I was shaped like you when I was in the third grade.
[laughs]
- I was getting complaints on the food.
- The people that was already there
was coming back for seconds.
And your man was eating it too.
How about that? - Uh-oh.
Shots fired. Shots fired.
- Y'all ready for this one, jury?
- Yes.
- We did our squat for today.
- Well, let's knock it out of the park Wednesday.
Come on, Bailiff. What we got?
- This is the case of Metayer versus Boyer.
- Plaintiff Khadija Metayer is suing her friend Toya
for $950, the amount that she paid
Toya for catering an event.
Khadija said her nasty food left a bad taste
in her guests' mouth.
Defendant Toya Boyer says she gave Khadija
exactly what she asked for.
And if she would have been on time to her own event,
the food would have been fresh with no complaints.
- Thank you. - All right.
Khadija, tell me why we're here today.
- I'm here suing my friend Toya for $950
for a food catering job.
I plan events. I booked her.
I was trying to put my homegirl on because I'm
all about my money, and I wanted her
to make some money as well.
As the event was going on, I was getting
complaints on the food.
Now, as a friend I pulled her to the side to let her know.
She starts going off on me, cursing out loud, cursing
at the people at the party.
It was just all bad.
And I had to refund the client back.
So I'm here today to get my money back.
- So how long have y'all known each other?
- Like five years.
You know, we were real close, like sisters.
- What happened to your finger?
Did you stick it in her ass?
[laughter]
- I don't play with booty, but--
- I'm just saying, I thought maybe you broke something
off in her, she owe you $950.
Toya, give me your side of the story.
- We've been friends, so she did put me on to some money.
And I appreciate that, but I'm not like a professional chef.
I do like cook for my kids on occasion and my friends.
I cooked everything that she asked me to.
I prepared the food the night before.
And then Khadija was late, so the food
was just sitting in the car.
And when she came, she already had an attitude up front.
Y'all need to hurry up and do this and that.
And we're like, how are we going to hurry up
when you're the one late?
I feel like if I did mess up, I'm sorry,
but we should be trying to work this together.
- Why was you late, Khadija?
- I had to get an extension cord for the DJ.
And, Judge, of course when I get there, yeah,
I'm going to be on it.
It's my job.
- You hired her to feed how many people?
- 55, but like 150 came.
[crowd muttering]
- You got to know what you're doing
to feed that amount of people.
So why would you give your friend
an opportunity who has never cooked
for 20 people in her life?
- Because I know she could cook.
Her presentation is good. Everything is good.
So she's talking about starting a business.
So I'm like, hey, this your chance.
Come out here and show me what you do.
Because I get booked almost every weekend,
so this could be me and you making money together.
That's how I'm looking at it.
- Did you tell her that you wanted to go to be a caterer?
- Yeah.
- OK.
Khadija, do you have a contract?
- No, I have an invoice.
- Do you have a picture of the food or the setup?
- Yes.
- OK, let me see the whole photo.
- I have everything in there, ma'am.
- Because I don't want y'all to work my man in there too.
- I have everything in here.
I have reviews about the food and everything
in there, ma'am.
- OK.
So you paid her $950 to feed these 55 people
and be professional?
- Yes. And I paid her up front.
- So the client wasn't happy?
- No, not at all.
People were complaining about the taste of the food.
The meatballs were very hard.
- How can you mess up meatball?
It's just meatballs and barbecue sauce.
- That's all you got to do.
- No, you put the little grape jelly in there too.
- Grape jelly meatballs?
- Oh, baby, stop talking because you're
going to lose now.
[laughter]
- You know what, I ain't even finna
tell y'all no more secrets.
- Calm down, baby.
Calm down, OK?
- Did they eat the food?
Was it all gone?
- Not all of it was not all gone.
- Yes, it was.
- She claims that the food was not gone, but how would
she know?
She left the event mad, cursing everybody.
- There was nothing for me to clean up or nothing.
Once you had an attitude, I left.
People that was already there was coming back for seconds.
So I don't understand why you're
saying my food was nasty.
- I didn't see that, Judge.
- And your man was eating it too.
How about that? - Uh-oh.
Uh-oh. Shots fired.
- OK. OK.
- Let me read these text messages.
- Please read them.
- Oh, my God, the food was horrible.
I couldn't believe she would serve something like that
and expect people to eat it.
The ribs was hard as [bleep] and unseasoned,
and the rice was mushy.
Where is the salt bae when you needed him?
- These are real reviews, Judge.
- It's all right.
I would never cook nothing else for her again.
- We know. - We know.
- We saw the text messages.
- [laughs]
- OK.
Give me your final statement, Khadija.
- I do feel like I do deserve my money back.
I really want to get past this so we can get back
to how we used to be, me coming to her house
eating and stuff like that, you know what I'm saying?
I miss my friend.
- I don't know if you want to eat her food again,
but I understand.
[laughter]
Toya, let me hear you, baby.
- OK.
I'm going to be the bigger person.
I apologize.
We're better than this.
We don't have to work together and do no type of business
together again.
You know your friend.
You know how I am.
And I hope we can move forward.
And that's all I have to say.
I don't owe her no $950.
- Do you accept her apology?
- If I get my money back.
- Ooh!
- All right, I'm going to settle this right now.
[dramatic music]
I'm going to rule in favor...
of the defendant, Toya,
because you had no business hiring
your inexperienced-ass friend.
It's settled. - Ooh.
- Thank you. - You are dismissed.
- Wait.
I hope one thing you walk out of this courtroom
with is a relationship.
One little bad meal shouldn't ruin your friendship.
- Give me a hug.
I will never cook for you again.
[laughter]
- And that's that with Ms. Pat.
Now get out.
[laughter]
- I know what happened to her finger.
- What?
- She broke it on one of them hard-ass ribs.
[laughter]
- That was a good one.
- I'm here to sue Patrick to repaint my mom's house.
He got a track record of shoddy work.
- You basically hired him to, hey, [bleep] my mom's house up.
[laughter]
- How are you doing today, jury?
- Great. - Good.
- I'm doing well, Your Honor. - Good.
[dramatic music]
- Come on, Bailiff.
Please start bailiffing.
- This is the case of Tyler versus Johnson.
- Plaintiff Dejan Tyler is suing his ex-friend Patrick
for $4,800 to hire a professional house painter
to fix the horrible paint job Patrick
did on Dejan's mom's house.
Defendant Patrick Johnson says his house painting
skills are not the problem.
It is the shady discount paint Dejan bought for the job.
- All right, Dejan.
Tell me why we're here today.
- I'm here to sue Patrick for $4,800
to repaint my mom's house.
He did a horrible job with it.
And that's how much it's going to cost
to have a professional come and correct what he messed up.
- Inside or out?
- Outside.
- How much did you pay him for the labor?
- For the labor?
Oh, he just did the labor. - Huh?
- He just did it.
We just bought the materials,
and he actually painted the house.
- He didn't charge y'all to paint the house?
- No.
- OK, Patrick. - Yes.
- Tell me why we're here today.
- So since--his mom is like my mom,
I've been to their family reunions.
And when she said she needed her house painted,
there was no way I was going to let
someone else paint her house.
I said, you know, I'll do just like I
would do with my own mom.
I'm not going to charge you to paint it.
Just buy the materials, and it's good.
I gave her paint samples and swatches, suggested brands,
and where to get paint.
And they showed up with some back alley paint.
I'm not going to tell them no.
- Was it even in buckets?
Where'd you buy the paint from?
Just in an alley, and they go, I got paint.
Where'd you get paint from?
- I don't know.
- Let me see the paint. Let me see the house.
- I got pictures.
- He had to have paint swatches.
So you just didn't pop up and what?
[crowd oohing]
- That's for you, bro-- Dijon mustard.
It's the color of--
[chuckles]
- What happened to the paint?
Did it just roll off like makeup?
- No, it just--it changed and had like some little
weird Tuscan look to it.
I did the whole process, you know, the whole prep.
We pressure washed it, bleached the house down,
you know, caulk it, everything, mask off.
Did everything right.
So the paint went bad.
I mean, I ain't going to lie.
The paint job doesn't look good.
I don't like it either.
- He got a track record of doing shoddy work.
- The paint cost $4,800?
- Well, that's how much it would cost to have
a professional come redo it.
Because obviously, the paint that we bought,
he must have cut it.
- Ha! - Wait a minute.
I'm a DIYer.
How do you cut paint?
- Water.
- Who put water in paint?
- If it's water-based paint, you can cut it with water.
- You take the paint off the top.
- I know Pat, and I know he take shortcuts.
I just didn't think he'd take a shortcut
with family and friends.
- Sir.
Did you buy oops paint?
You know, oops paint is what somebody
else decided they didn't want.
And they just sit there and say,
hey, if this is in your color range, you can buy this.
Did you buy that paint?
♪ ♪
- I can't say.
I don't recall.
- Oh, my God.
He done bought this paint from a crackhead.
♪ ♪
- Plaintiff Dejan Tyler is suing his ex-friend Patrick
for $4,800 to have his mom's house
professionally repainted after he claims Patrick
did a crappy paint job.
Ms. Pat is trying to get to the bottom of this.
- You bought the paint, sir.
- Yes, I bought the paint.
- Did you buy outdoor paint?
- Yes, it was house paint.
He approved the paint that I bought.
- All of the house paint?
- Outdoor paint.
He approved it.
He initially approved the paint when it was bought.
- All he did was took the paint and put it on the house.
- But he said this is the right paint, and it ain't.
- Did you say that was the right paint?
- I don't ask questions.
People have their product.
I just give them recommendations,
and they go off what they want to go off of.
- Did you notice it was outdoor/indoor paint?
- I didn't notice anything because the paint
didn't say what it was.
It was just--
- I knew it.
- The paint didn't have no label?
- No.
I bought regular paint.
- Did he work at the paint store
or out back of the paint store?
- He worked at the paint store.
He was a paint professional.
I gave him the paint, and he approved.
- Dejan, what's your mama say about this?
- She's mad about it.
- Did she send a video?
- Yes, she did.
- All right, let's look at your mama do this video.
- Patrick did a horrible job.
[laughter]
It looked like a put-up job.
- Ooh.
- Well, there were blotches of paint in some places.
The kids on my street would call
it the Michael Jackson house because the paint was spotty.
- Oh, damn.
- It looked like you telling her what to say.
- No, I'm not telling-- you gotta understand.
- Now say this. - Hold on.
- Now say this.
- I can hear you in the back. Mama, put on your sad play.
Make your eyes a little bit more go down.
Come on, Mama.
You told her.
We all heard it, Dejan.
Come on, Deray.
What you think about this?
- The fact he did it for free, I don't feel he's
responsible for taking care of fixing it.
Because you did hire him, and you
said you know how he get down.
Right there alone, you already--
if you knew how he get down, you basically hired him to,
hey, [bleep] my mom's house up.
That's it. - Dejan.
- Yes, yes.
- I'm going to be honest with you.
You know damn well you ain't walked in there
and bought no premium paint for your mama.
Your mama gave you money for that paint.
- Yes, she did.
- And you kept that money.
You went and bought--no, Dejan, Dejan, I already know.
Because I already know how you and Lionel Richie roll.
You went to one of these liquidation places
and you bought some garbage paint,
thinking your mama wasn't going to never go
outside and look at her house.
And she went out there one day, and she said, why is my house
turning white in the middle?
And you immediately said, Patrick did a horrible job.
Patrick, stop running around here painting
your friend's house for free.
You know damn well you ain't that good of a painter anyway.
That's why you do it for free.
This is ridiculous.
All right, I'm going to settle this.
[dramatic music]
I'm ruling in favor of...
the defendant, Patrick.
♪ ♪
Dejan, you ain't getting no money.
Friends and favors don't mix, just like that paint.
[gavel bangs]
That settles it.
And that's that with Ms. Pat.
Now go tell your mama you kept her money.
- Hey, this is Atlanta though.
Y'all could go out tonight, paint the town red.
- Damn well he bought all that oops--
I know where he got it from, the place
off Cleveland Avenue.
[laughs]
I be up there shopping too.
- She begged me not to press charges on my stolen vehicle.
- Jasmine, you left that little detail out of your testimony.
- OK.
- I'm suing my cousin to replace
the days that I missed at work.
- Lies.
- Can y'all be serious for a minute?
- Please.
Tell us to be serious in Ms. Pat's courtroom.
- Order in the court!
You was going to let him get you pregnant so y'all could
have a friendship baby.
She ran off with your money and the vagina?
- Yep.
- Well, damn.
[dramatic music]