1
00:00:01,368 --> 00:00:02,502
- You ain't never
met a judge like me.
2
00:00:02,502 --> 00:00:03,937
- Your Honor, Your Honor!
3
00:00:03,937 --> 00:00:05,739
- Shut the hell up and let me
get this thing together!
4
00:00:05,739 --> 00:00:07,774
Hey, y'all, I'm Ms. Pat.
5
00:00:07,774 --> 00:00:09,442
I know the inside
of a courtroom.
6
00:00:09,442 --> 00:00:10,577
[hip-hop music]
7
00:00:10,577 --> 00:00:12,512
Went to jail
for selling cocaine.
8
00:00:12,512 --> 00:00:14,681
Now here I am 25 years later
9
00:00:14,681 --> 00:00:16,182
sitting on this side
of the bench.
10
00:00:16,182 --> 00:00:17,484
- I put my faith in your hands.
11
00:00:17,484 --> 00:00:18,885
- Don't put your faith
in my hands.
12
00:00:18,885 --> 00:00:20,253
I ain't God.
I don't love you.
13
00:00:20,253 --> 00:00:22,155
I'm using everything
I learned on the street...
14
00:00:22,155 --> 00:00:23,323
Don't nobody owe you nothing.
15
00:00:23,323 --> 00:00:25,392
To solve dispute
that are tearing
16
00:00:25,392 --> 00:00:27,527
real family and friends apart.
17
00:00:27,527 --> 00:00:28,995
- I ain't care if he found out.
What's his is mine.
18
00:00:28,995 --> 00:00:30,096
- We ain't married.
19
00:00:30,096 --> 00:00:31,498
- And we brothers.
- Hey.
20
00:00:31,498 --> 00:00:34,834
These are real cases
with real money on the line.
21
00:00:34,834 --> 00:00:36,169
What you do with the $5,000?
22
00:00:36,169 --> 00:00:37,737
- I-I'll let you know.
23
00:00:37,737 --> 00:00:39,239
- Well, I'm here.
Let me know.
24
00:00:39,239 --> 00:00:41,174
And I'm bringing
my own family and friends
25
00:00:41,174 --> 00:00:42,675
to court as my jury.
26
00:00:42,675 --> 00:00:44,210
Their opinions
are like diarrhea.
27
00:00:44,210 --> 00:00:45,412
It belongs in the toilet.
28
00:00:45,412 --> 00:00:46,980
- You out of order!
29
00:00:46,980 --> 00:00:48,348
Matter of fact, this whole
damn courtroom is out of order!
30
00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:49,349
[laughter]
31
00:00:49,349 --> 00:00:50,350
- Y'all may have started it,
32
00:00:50,350 --> 00:00:51,684
but I'm going to settle it.
33
00:00:51,684 --> 00:00:52,852
- Let's just wrap this up
34
00:00:52,852 --> 00:00:54,421
'cause I'm getting
very irritated.
35
00:00:54,421 --> 00:00:57,357
- You keep running your mouth,
you ain't gonna get nothing!
36
00:00:57,357 --> 00:00:58,958
Court is now in session.
37
00:00:58,958 --> 00:01:00,560
Baby, don't do me, do Jesus,
38
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:02,829
'cause he got more patience
with you, okay?
39
00:01:02,829 --> 00:01:03,863
♪ ♪
40
00:01:05,932 --> 00:01:07,700
- She doesn't
have a law degree,
41
00:01:07,700 --> 00:01:10,203
but she has a degree
in no bullshit.
42
00:01:10,203 --> 00:01:13,673
All rise for
the illustrious Ms. Pat.
43
00:01:13,673 --> 00:01:17,110
[upbeat hip-hop music]
44
00:01:17,110 --> 00:01:19,579
- Y'all can go on and sit
your luxury asses down.
45
00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:21,981
[laughter]
46
00:01:21,981 --> 00:01:23,116
How y'all doing today, jury?
47
00:01:23,116 --> 00:01:24,651
- I never thought that I would
be
48
00:01:24,651 --> 00:01:26,820
on the jury of a judge
who shot somebody before.
49
00:01:26,820 --> 00:01:28,855
- I didn't think
I would be a judge
50
00:01:28,855 --> 00:01:30,523
of somebody who got on
a bowling shirt
51
00:01:30,523 --> 00:01:31,691
and we ain't in
no bowling alley.
52
00:01:31,691 --> 00:01:33,126
[laughter]
53
00:01:33,126 --> 00:01:34,627
Bailiff, let's get
this thing started.
54
00:01:34,627 --> 00:01:38,498
- This is the case of
Knighton versus Knighton.
55
00:01:38,498 --> 00:01:40,033
You may now enter.
56
00:01:40,033 --> 00:01:42,735
- Plaintiff Travon Knighton
is suing his twin sister
57
00:01:42,735 --> 00:01:47,207
for $509.84 for damage to
a rental house they shared
58
00:01:47,207 --> 00:01:49,409
for their 22nd birthday bash.
59
00:01:49,409 --> 00:01:52,579
Defendant Trayanna Knighton
admits she did get tore up,
60
00:01:52,579 --> 00:01:55,148
but it wasn't her
who tore the place down.
61
00:01:55,148 --> 00:01:59,052
- This children's court?
[laughter]
62
00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:00,787
Them two kids.
[chuckles]
63
00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:04,457
- Travon is convinced that
his good sis is a bad liar.
64
00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:06,493
- OK, before we get going,
I just want to let you know
65
00:02:06,493 --> 00:02:08,261
this is a jury of my peers, OK?
66
00:02:08,261 --> 00:02:10,396
Their opinions are
like diarrhea.
67
00:02:10,396 --> 00:02:14,200
It belongs in the toilet.
[laughter]
68
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:17,070
OK.
Y'all's twins?
69
00:02:17,070 --> 00:02:18,738
- Yes, Your Honor.
We are twins.
70
00:02:18,738 --> 00:02:20,573
- Y'all was definitely
wasn't in the same sac.
71
00:02:20,573 --> 00:02:23,042
- Sho' nuff.
That's exactly what I said.
72
00:02:23,042 --> 00:02:25,245
[laughter]
73
00:02:25,245 --> 00:02:28,281
- All right, then, Trayvon,
what brings you here today?
74
00:02:28,281 --> 00:02:31,251
- I'm here to sue my twin
sister, Trayanna Knighton,
75
00:02:31,251 --> 00:02:35,622
for $509.84 worth
of rental property damages
76
00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:38,992
that was caused for
our 22nd birthday celebration.
77
00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:41,094
The plan was for me to
pay for the club
78
00:02:41,094 --> 00:02:42,962
and her to pay
for the rental property.
79
00:02:42,962 --> 00:02:44,297
- Mm-hmm?
80
00:02:44,297 --> 00:02:46,566
- She used my information
to pay for the rental.
81
00:02:46,566 --> 00:02:49,969
A couple of days later,
I get a email from the host
82
00:02:49,969 --> 00:02:51,471
telling me it was damages
at the property.
83
00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:52,939
[audience murmuring]
Holes in the wall,
84
00:02:52,939 --> 00:02:54,841
pages ripped out the cookbook.
85
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:56,276
- Somebody stole a recipe?
86
00:02:56,276 --> 00:02:58,144
- I guess so, Your Honor.
[laughter]
87
00:02:58,144 --> 00:03:01,314
It was damages of $509.84.
88
00:03:01,314 --> 00:03:03,683
And I had to let her know
because we're not doing that.
89
00:03:03,683 --> 00:03:05,118
We're not doing that at all.
90
00:03:05,118 --> 00:03:07,120
- Mm.
[laughter]
91
00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:09,756
Sometimes with twins, there's
a good twin and an evil twin.
92
00:03:09,756 --> 00:03:11,324
Who's the evil one?
93
00:03:11,324 --> 00:03:14,294
[laughter]
94
00:03:14,294 --> 00:03:16,229
- She the evil one.
- Yeah, she the evil one.
95
00:03:16,229 --> 00:03:18,631
- Yeah, absolutely. She's evil.
- She the evil one.
96
00:03:18,631 --> 00:03:20,833
- You make all them faces,
like, "Uh."
97
00:03:20,833 --> 00:03:23,169
[laughter]
You evil.
98
00:03:23,169 --> 00:03:25,204
- I don't trust super short
people 'cause if God liked you,
99
00:03:25,204 --> 00:03:26,406
he would have give you
a couple more inches.
100
00:03:26,406 --> 00:03:27,740
- Damn.
101
00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:29,275
- Don't say that in the bedroom
with no man.
102
00:03:29,275 --> 00:03:31,811
- Hello!
[laughter]
103
00:03:31,811 --> 00:03:33,413
- All right, Trayanna?
104
00:03:33,413 --> 00:03:36,516
- I would just like to say that
Travon dragged me down here
105
00:03:36,516 --> 00:03:38,618
just to be begging
for some money.
106
00:03:38,618 --> 00:03:42,021
It was a group of us in there,
more than 15 people.
107
00:03:42,021 --> 00:03:44,524
I'm not sure why he's trying
to point the finger at me
108
00:03:44,524 --> 00:03:48,661
because him and his people
was lit the whole entire night.
109
00:03:48,661 --> 00:03:49,929
[audience murmuring]
110
00:03:49,929 --> 00:03:51,431
- You were supposed
to pay for the club,
111
00:03:51,431 --> 00:03:53,399
and she was supposed to pay
for the rental property?
112
00:03:53,399 --> 00:03:54,734
- Yes, Your Honor.
113
00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:56,336
- And so was the party
supposed to spill over
114
00:03:56,336 --> 00:03:58,371
to the rental property?
- Yes, ma'am, it was.
115
00:03:58,371 --> 00:04:01,374
When I pulled up to
the rental property,
116
00:04:01,374 --> 00:04:02,909
she was already there.
117
00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:04,444
She was already tore up
from the floor
118
00:04:04,444 --> 00:04:05,511
when I walked in the door.
119
00:04:05,511 --> 00:04:07,246
We come in there,
we play games,
120
00:04:07,246 --> 00:04:08,781
listen to music
for a little bit.
121
00:04:08,781 --> 00:04:10,483
And then I left around
like 2:00,
122
00:04:10,483 --> 00:04:11,818
something that in the morning.
123
00:04:11,818 --> 00:04:13,853
So me and everybody
who came with me,
124
00:04:13,853 --> 00:04:15,321
we ended up leaving
the property.
125
00:04:15,321 --> 00:04:17,290
- So was the property damaged
when you was there?
126
00:04:17,290 --> 00:04:18,958
- No, Your Honor, it was not.
- Mm!
127
00:04:18,958 --> 00:04:20,660
- Did you have fun at the club,
Travon?
128
00:04:20,660 --> 00:04:23,196
- And I did. I was just like--
[laughter]
129
00:04:23,196 --> 00:04:24,998
I was like, ooh!
- Go ahead.
130
00:04:24,998 --> 00:04:27,166
- [scatting]
- Hey, hey, hey!
131
00:04:27,166 --> 00:04:29,802
- [scatting]
[all cheering]
132
00:04:29,802 --> 00:04:32,438
- Yeah, right there,
Your Honor, right there.
133
00:04:32,438 --> 00:04:34,207
- OK.
[applause]
134
00:04:34,207 --> 00:04:37,210
- Yeah, yeah, I was having
so much fun, Your Honor.
135
00:04:37,210 --> 00:04:39,078
- You sure you didn't go
and do that down the hallway?
136
00:04:39,078 --> 00:04:40,847
- I promise you, I didn't.
137
00:04:40,847 --> 00:04:42,815
- Did you spend the night
at the rental property?
138
00:04:42,815 --> 00:04:43,850
- I did, Your Honor.
139
00:04:43,850 --> 00:04:45,251
- Did you wake up
the next morning
140
00:04:45,251 --> 00:04:47,820
with holes in the wall
and things broken?
141
00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:48,988
- No, Your Honor.
142
00:04:48,988 --> 00:04:50,423
- Who tore up
the rental property?
143
00:04:50,423 --> 00:04:52,058
- Your Honor,
I can tell you who.
144
00:04:52,058 --> 00:04:53,493
- Who?
- It was her and her man.
145
00:04:53,493 --> 00:04:55,528
- They throw each
other up against--to the wall?
146
00:04:55,528 --> 00:04:57,063
- Yes, I don't know
what's going on.
147
00:04:57,063 --> 00:04:58,464
- So where's your man at?
148
00:04:58,464 --> 00:04:59,966
- Unavailable at the moment.
149
00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:00,000
- Oh, I know what that means.
150
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,834
- Oh, I know what that means.
151
00:05:01,834 --> 00:05:03,369
[laughter]
152
00:05:03,369 --> 00:05:05,705
- Your Honor, Your Honor,
Your Honor!
153
00:05:05,705 --> 00:05:07,073
- Don't "Your Honor" me.
154
00:05:07,073 --> 00:05:09,676
I've had one of them
"unavailable" men.
155
00:05:09,676 --> 00:05:11,411
- [groans]
156
00:05:11,411 --> 00:05:13,713
- Did you get a notice from
the rental company, Travon?
157
00:05:13,713 --> 00:05:15,048
- Yes, Your Honor.
158
00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:17,283
- Well, let me see
what you got, Travon.
159
00:05:17,283 --> 00:05:18,551
- There you go.
160
00:05:18,551 --> 00:05:19,819
- 'Cause your sister
done worked your nerves.
161
00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:21,754
- She worked
the last one I got.
162
00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:23,423
- This is for
the rental company.
163
00:05:23,423 --> 00:05:25,692
The host, Brandon,
requested reimbursement.
164
00:05:25,692 --> 00:05:28,494
OK, before I make
my final decision,
165
00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:30,229
Travon, do you have anything
you need from me here?
166
00:05:30,229 --> 00:05:32,298
- Yes, Your Honor.
I really do love my sister.
167
00:05:32,298 --> 00:05:34,233
I love her dearly.
I would do anything for her.
168
00:05:34,233 --> 00:05:36,502
But you gave me your word.
You have to own your word.
169
00:05:36,502 --> 00:05:38,504
Don't say you're going to
do something then don't do it.
170
00:05:38,504 --> 00:05:40,840
- Trayanna,
any final words you have
171
00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:42,075
before I make my decision?
172
00:05:42,075 --> 00:05:43,576
- Travon, I love you.
173
00:05:43,576 --> 00:05:45,545
I'm not sure why
you brought me here.
174
00:05:45,545 --> 00:05:48,881
As if I'm the one that
put a hole in the wall,
175
00:05:48,881 --> 00:05:50,750
ripped the cookbook
out that book...
176
00:05:50,750 --> 00:05:52,618
- Are you high?
- Move the thing.
177
00:05:52,618 --> 00:05:53,986
There's a lot going on
that you're accusing me of.
178
00:05:53,986 --> 00:05:55,455
- She said "rip the cookbook
out the book."
179
00:05:55,455 --> 00:05:57,323
[laughter]
- This is a waste of time.
180
00:05:57,323 --> 00:06:00,660
And we should just
move forward from this.
181
00:06:00,660 --> 00:06:01,861
- A waste of time?
182
00:06:01,861 --> 00:06:03,196
This not like no $20
right here.
183
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,565
This is $509.84.
[laughter]
184
00:06:05,565 --> 00:06:07,700
Mm-mm, Your Honor, mm-mm.
185
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,102
- Oh, yeah, that's a lot.
- OK.
186
00:06:09,102 --> 00:06:10,937
- [laughs]
- I've heard enough.
187
00:06:10,937 --> 00:06:12,839
The crazy part is
that y'all twins
188
00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:15,408
and y'all are here arguing
over a 22nd birthday.
189
00:06:15,408 --> 00:06:17,810
I pray to God that
you share many more.
190
00:06:17,810 --> 00:06:21,447
But you, Trayanna, need
to get your stuff together.
191
00:06:21,447 --> 00:06:24,317
You need to hold up to your
end of the birthday bash.
192
00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:28,054
- Your end was to get the
rental property, pay for it,
193
00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:30,056
and make sure it
did not get damaged.
194
00:06:30,056 --> 00:06:33,059
But instead,
you didn't do that.
195
00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:34,861
That's not how
you treat your brother.
196
00:06:34,861 --> 00:06:36,229
That's your twin brother.
197
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:37,830
Just because
y'all don't look alike,
198
00:06:37,830 --> 00:06:39,398
don't mean if
I kick him in the knee,
199
00:06:39,398 --> 00:06:41,100
you wouldn't feel it too.
[laughter]
200
00:06:41,100 --> 00:06:43,736
- And Travon, stop going into
business with people
201
00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:45,338
who ain't got they business
together.
202
00:06:45,338 --> 00:06:48,007
You knew she was like this
before you met her.
203
00:06:48,007 --> 00:06:50,376
[laughter]
I'm just kidding.
204
00:06:50,376 --> 00:06:52,712
- Wait a minute. What?
[laughter]
205
00:06:52,712 --> 00:06:54,046
- Wait a minute.
206
00:06:54,046 --> 00:06:54,981
- Came out the womb like this.
- Y'all twins.
207
00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:56,415
- Right!
- I'm sorry.
208
00:06:56,415 --> 00:06:58,084
Before you met
the ugly side of her.
209
00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,919
- Yes.
[laughter]
210
00:06:59,919 --> 00:07:01,254
- I'm going to settle this
right now.
211
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:03,322
[dramatic hip-hop music]
212
00:07:03,322 --> 00:07:06,526
I'm ruling in favor of...
213
00:07:06,526 --> 00:07:08,961
the plaintiff, Travon Knighton,
214
00:07:08,961 --> 00:07:13,499
in the amount of $254.92.
215
00:07:13,499 --> 00:07:15,802
You shared your mama bellies,
now you gonna share the bill.
216
00:07:15,802 --> 00:07:17,804
[gavel pounds]
- Thank you, Your Honor.
217
00:07:17,804 --> 00:07:20,740
- You two are dismissed.
218
00:07:20,740 --> 00:07:22,742
- I used to want a twin,
but not after that.
219
00:07:22,742 --> 00:07:24,911
I don't know if they got
enough oxygen in that sack.
220
00:07:24,911 --> 00:07:27,747
- I got twin grandsons that
don't look nothing alike.
221
00:07:27,747 --> 00:07:30,116
Yeah, one cute, one ugly.
[laughter]
222
00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:32,518
And the crazy part is
the one we consider to be ugly
223
00:07:32,518 --> 00:07:33,820
look like my side
of the family.
224
00:07:33,820 --> 00:07:36,322
[laughter]
225
00:07:36,322 --> 00:07:37,890
What did you alter
on this dress?
226
00:07:37,890 --> 00:07:39,959
- The only thing that I altered
was just, like, the bust.
227
00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:42,094
- It was completely altered.
228
00:07:42,094 --> 00:07:45,231
- Y'all are going tit for tit.
[laughter]
229
00:07:45,231 --> 00:07:47,166
- Forged my signature,
cashed the check.
230
00:07:47,166 --> 00:07:48,234
- Oh.
231
00:07:48,234 --> 00:07:49,569
- What'd you do
with the $5,000?
232
00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:51,871
- Um, I-I'll let you know.
233
00:07:51,871 --> 00:07:53,573
- Well, I'm here.
Let me know.
234
00:07:55,007 --> 00:07:56,609
[dramatic hip-hop music]
235
00:07:56,609 --> 00:07:58,244
- All right, jury, y'all know
what's right and what's wrong.
236
00:07:58,244 --> 00:07:59,479
We just got to explain
to everybody else
237
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:00,747
who come through those doors.
238
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:04,283
All right, bailiff, do the
bailiff-ing thing that you do.
239
00:08:04,283 --> 00:08:08,121
- This is a case of
Brown versus Henderson.
240
00:08:08,121 --> 00:08:12,358
- Plaintiff Bee Brown is suing
her friend, Paris, for $701
241
00:08:12,358 --> 00:08:13,960
for a dress
she let her borrow.
242
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:16,696
Bee claims that Paris
permanently altered the dress
243
00:08:16,696 --> 00:08:20,333
to fit her smaller ta-tas,
and now, it's ruined for Bee.
244
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:23,136
- You come in here like
you're on the drill team.
245
00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:25,238
[laughter]
- Yes, ma'am.
246
00:08:25,238 --> 00:08:27,306
- Defendant Paris Henderson
says
247
00:08:27,306 --> 00:08:29,709
Bee gave her blessing
to alter the dress,
248
00:08:29,709 --> 00:08:33,646
so her friend is out of line
for the attack on her rack.
249
00:08:33,646 --> 00:08:35,681
- So, Bee,
tell me why you here, girl.
250
00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:39,352
- Well, I'm here because
I allowed Paris
251
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:43,423
to utilize my dress
that cost $761.
252
00:08:43,423 --> 00:08:46,692
But when I got the dress back,
it was completely altered
253
00:08:46,692 --> 00:08:49,996
to the point where I can't even
fit one titty in the dress.
254
00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:52,432
- Oh, wow. Oh, oh, oh.
255
00:08:52,432 --> 00:08:53,866
[laughter]
256
00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:57,270
- So I'm just here
to collect my $761
257
00:08:57,270 --> 00:08:58,704
that I feel is owed to me.
258
00:08:58,704 --> 00:09:01,541
- OK, uh, Paris, tell me
your side of the story.
259
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:02,909
- This is my friend.
260
00:09:02,909 --> 00:09:05,378
We borrow things back
and forth all the time.
261
00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:07,580
I did ask to borrow the dress.
262
00:09:07,580 --> 00:09:10,883
I did also let her know
that I would need to
263
00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:13,352
alter the dress to fit my bust.
264
00:09:13,352 --> 00:09:14,887
- Objection.
[clears throat]
265
00:09:14,887 --> 00:09:16,255
[laughter]
266
00:09:16,255 --> 00:09:19,292
- Did you tell her not
to alter your clothes?
267
00:09:19,292 --> 00:09:21,928
- [scoffs] I told her
that if she alter it,
268
00:09:21,928 --> 00:09:23,930
she better unalter it.
269
00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:27,700
Meaning, like, if she pinned
it, she needs to unpin it
270
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:30,002
and give it to me the way I,
you know, gave her the dress.
271
00:09:30,002 --> 00:09:31,370
- Absolutely not.
272
00:09:31,370 --> 00:09:32,738
- Do we have a picture
of this dress?
273
00:09:32,738 --> 00:09:34,740
- Oh, yes, ma'am, I do.
274
00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:36,108
- Oh, nice.
275
00:09:36,108 --> 00:09:38,010
- High fashion.
[snaps fingers]
276
00:09:38,010 --> 00:09:42,148
- $761? It's giving me
Fashion Nova, judge.
277
00:09:42,148 --> 00:09:43,282
- I thought that was
a trash bag.
278
00:09:43,282 --> 00:09:44,750
I ain't going to lie to you.
279
00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:47,019
- I assure you I got that from
a fashion district store.
280
00:09:47,019 --> 00:09:49,322
- OK, well, let's talk about
the alteration of the dress.
281
00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:51,224
So what did you alter
on this dress?
282
00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,326
- The only thing that I altered
was just, like, the bust.
283
00:09:53,326 --> 00:09:56,429
- So I just had them take it in
on the sides, on the bust,
284
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:57,730
so I can really tighten it.
285
00:09:57,730 --> 00:09:59,398
And it looked and it fit me
appropriately.
286
00:09:59,398 --> 00:10:01,067
But I didn't take it in
too much.
287
00:10:01,067 --> 00:10:03,336
- Does she know you made
permanent changes before?
288
00:10:03,336 --> 00:10:05,538
- Absolutely.
- What did she say?
289
00:10:05,538 --> 00:10:07,907
- As long as
you unalter that [bleep].
290
00:10:07,907 --> 00:10:09,408
- [scoffs] OK.
291
00:10:09,408 --> 00:10:11,577
- L-O-L.
[laughter]
292
00:10:11,577 --> 00:10:14,580
- Is there any documentation
or text message or anything?
293
00:10:14,580 --> 00:10:17,316
- Absolutely.
First one, here.
294
00:10:19,819 --> 00:10:22,221
- And she said,
"Long as you unalter that MF."
295
00:10:22,221 --> 00:10:23,589
Laugh out loud.
296
00:10:23,589 --> 00:10:25,391
And then you said
laugh out loud.
297
00:10:25,391 --> 00:10:27,026
- Yeah.
[laughter]
298
00:10:27,026 --> 00:10:28,895
- So this is what's wrong
with you young generation.
299
00:10:28,895 --> 00:10:31,697
Y'all take L-O-L to not
be for real.
300
00:10:31,697 --> 00:10:33,733
You know, like, I'ma kill you,
bitch, L-O-L.
301
00:10:33,733 --> 00:10:35,701
No!
[laughter]
302
00:10:35,701 --> 00:10:37,136
- 'Cause I'm scared.
303
00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:39,238
- Yeah, you did--they might
be going to kill you.
304
00:10:39,238 --> 00:10:40,840
[laughter]
Why did you say L-O-L?
305
00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:42,742
- Because I wanted her to know,
like--
306
00:10:42,742 --> 00:10:44,877
[fake laughs]
Make sure you unalter it.
307
00:10:44,877 --> 00:10:46,746
She know how we talk.
308
00:10:46,746 --> 00:10:49,048
- So, you saying,
from this text message,
309
00:10:49,048 --> 00:10:50,816
she knew you were serious?
310
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:52,051
- Yeah.
311
00:10:52,051 --> 00:10:53,819
I put MF.
- [snickers]
312
00:10:53,819 --> 00:10:55,154
- See, this is what happens
when you text too much.
313
00:10:55,154 --> 00:10:56,589
I'm 51 years old, baby.
314
00:10:56,589 --> 00:10:58,591
That's why I would have called.
Look here, Carmen,
315
00:10:58,591 --> 00:11:01,160
alter my stuff
the old way with pins.
316
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:02,328
- Bitch.
317
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:03,863
[laughter]
318
00:11:03,863 --> 00:11:05,731
- It definitely would have
been a bitch on there.
319
00:11:05,731 --> 00:11:08,901
- Sound like to me, you just
wanted to take the girl dress.
320
00:11:08,901 --> 00:11:10,269
- Thank you.
321
00:11:10,269 --> 00:11:11,337
- She ain't planning
on giving that dress back.
322
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:12,905
[laughter]
323
00:11:12,905 --> 00:11:16,809
- OK, how did this
affect your relationship?
324
00:11:16,809 --> 00:11:18,978
- I'm sorry,
I don't want to get emotional.
325
00:11:18,978 --> 00:11:20,846
- Uh-oh.
- [sniffles]
326
00:11:20,846 --> 00:11:22,348
This is my friend,
Your Honor, like--
327
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:23,783
- I don't want to see her cry.
328
00:11:23,783 --> 00:11:25,184
- My father passed away.
329
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:27,587
She was the only one
that was there for me.
330
00:11:27,587 --> 00:11:29,121
Like, we had a bond.
331
00:11:29,121 --> 00:11:31,123
[sighs]
Sorry.
332
00:11:31,123 --> 00:11:33,726
- I can't even tell her about
the new things I got going on,
333
00:11:33,726 --> 00:11:35,194
adventures, get her advice.
334
00:11:35,194 --> 00:11:36,596
This woman is brilliant.
335
00:11:36,596 --> 00:11:38,931
And I can't even talk to her
because of a dress.
336
00:11:38,931 --> 00:11:39,932
all: Aw.
337
00:11:39,932 --> 00:11:41,000
- How do this make you feel,
338
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:44,437
that your friend
is sitting here
339
00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:45,938
crying over this dress?
340
00:11:45,938 --> 00:11:49,008
- It does make me sad that
we haven't been able to bond
341
00:11:49,008 --> 00:11:50,476
and see each other.
342
00:11:50,476 --> 00:11:51,877
It make me sad that I haven't
been able to tell her
343
00:11:51,877 --> 00:11:54,213
what's going on in my world.
344
00:11:54,213 --> 00:11:55,681
Because you're so brilliant,
too.
345
00:11:55,681 --> 00:11:57,717
- Damn it, ain't never had
no friends say that to me.
346
00:11:57,717 --> 00:11:58,951
- We can be your friend.
347
00:11:58,951 --> 00:12:00,353
- No, you ain't
going to take my robe
348
00:12:00,353 --> 00:12:02,355
and tuck it in
and make some money.
349
00:12:02,355 --> 00:12:04,357
[laughter]
350
00:12:04,357 --> 00:12:06,859
Next thing I know, you be
in here, making decisions.
351
00:12:06,859 --> 00:12:09,028
[laughter]
352
00:12:09,028 --> 00:12:10,262
All right, jury,
what do y'all think?
353
00:12:10,262 --> 00:12:12,832
- I think y'all are
going tit for tit.
354
00:12:12,832 --> 00:12:15,868
[laughter]
355
00:12:15,868 --> 00:12:18,738
- Not the tit for tit.
356
00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:22,108
You the knockout king, Ray J.
[laughter]
357
00:12:22,108 --> 00:12:23,442
Bailiff, what you think?
358
00:12:23,442 --> 00:12:25,244
- This case has been
a real handful.
359
00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:28,848
[laughter]
- Yes!
360
00:12:28,848 --> 00:12:31,684
- All right,
I've made my decision.
361
00:12:31,684 --> 00:12:33,986
I'm going to settle this
right here, right now.
362
00:12:33,986 --> 00:12:36,389
So, Bee, when people
are not your size,
363
00:12:36,389 --> 00:12:37,490
don't give them your stuff.
364
00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:39,458
And if you do,
let them have it.
365
00:12:39,458 --> 00:12:42,762
And Paris, you have no business
borrowing this lady clothes.
366
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:45,097
Y'all are not the same size.
367
00:12:45,097 --> 00:12:48,367
She got between
20 to 35 buckles
368
00:12:48,367 --> 00:12:50,136
on the back of her bra.
369
00:12:50,136 --> 00:12:52,538
You only probably got eight.
370
00:12:52,538 --> 00:12:54,000
Y'all need to stick to loaning
each other perfume, earrings,
371
00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,575
Y'all need to stick to loaning
each other perfume, earrings,
372
00:12:56,575 --> 00:12:58,678
because everything else
ain't gonna work.
373
00:12:58,678 --> 00:13:00,046
[laughter]
374
00:13:00,046 --> 00:13:02,481
After considering
the facts of this case,
375
00:13:02,481 --> 00:13:04,216
I'm going to settle this
once and for all.
376
00:13:04,216 --> 00:13:06,652
[dramatic music]
377
00:13:06,652 --> 00:13:07,753
♪ ♪
378
00:13:07,753 --> 00:13:10,723
I'm going to rule
in favor of...
379
00:13:10,723 --> 00:13:13,459
♪ ♪
380
00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:16,629
The plaintiff, Bee,
381
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:19,231
for $761
382
00:13:19,231 --> 00:13:21,801
because you made permanent
alteration to a dress
383
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:24,537
that could have made permanent
alteration to your friendship.
384
00:13:24,537 --> 00:13:26,939
Now, do you forgive her, Bee?
- I ain't gonna lie.
385
00:13:26,939 --> 00:13:29,041
I miss her.
I miss our friendship.
386
00:13:29,041 --> 00:13:30,643
all: Aw.
- Hug each other.
387
00:13:32,078 --> 00:13:33,212
- Aw.
388
00:13:33,212 --> 00:13:34,480
- There we go.
[applause]
389
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:36,449
[gavel pounds]
- That's it.
390
00:13:36,449 --> 00:13:38,350
Would you ever let somebody
borrow that uniform?
391
00:13:38,350 --> 00:13:41,454
- Hell, no.
[laughter]
392
00:13:41,454 --> 00:13:43,956
- If the bra don't fit,
you must acquit.
393
00:13:43,956 --> 00:13:46,859
[laughter]
394
00:13:46,859 --> 00:13:48,828
- I discovered
she forged my signature.
395
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,730
I just told her that
I wanted a divorce.
396
00:13:50,730 --> 00:13:51,764
- What?
397
00:13:54,901 --> 00:13:56,002
- How are y'all doing today,
jury?
398
00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:57,504
- We've come a mighty long way.
399
00:13:57,504 --> 00:13:58,972
- We going to have
some fun today.
400
00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:00,340
Come on, call them in, bailiff.
401
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:04,577
- This is the case of
Bookman versus Bookman.
402
00:14:04,577 --> 00:14:06,746
You may now enter.
403
00:14:06,746 --> 00:14:10,250
- Kevin Bookman is suing his
estranged wife for $5,000
404
00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:12,018
to replace
the fire insurance money
405
00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:14,487
she straight up stole
out of their bank account.
406
00:14:14,487 --> 00:14:17,157
But defendant Tiffny Bookman
claims the fire money
407
00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:19,692
she lifted was for a lift
of another kind
408
00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:22,295
that could reignite the flame
in their marriage
409
00:14:22,295 --> 00:14:25,799
if Kevin would just get
his head out of his ash.
410
00:14:25,799 --> 00:14:28,201
- All right, Kevin,
tell me why we're here today.
411
00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:32,238
- I am suing Tiffny
for $5,000 that she stole
412
00:14:32,238 --> 00:14:35,308
from insurance company money
that they paid out
413
00:14:35,308 --> 00:14:36,876
for a house fire we had.
414
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:38,144
The damage was substantial,
415
00:14:38,144 --> 00:14:41,548
so the insurance company
cut a $5,000 check,
416
00:14:41,548 --> 00:14:44,884
which she took out of the
account without my knowledge.
417
00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:47,353
And I just told her
that I wanted a divorce.
418
00:14:47,353 --> 00:14:49,022
- Ooh.
419
00:14:49,022 --> 00:14:50,657
- When did you find out
the money was missing?
420
00:14:50,657 --> 00:14:53,560
- I discovered a deposit
in our joint account.
421
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:55,595
She forged my signature,
cashed the check.
422
00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:57,497
[audience murmurs]
- Oh, that's criminal.
423
00:14:57,497 --> 00:14:59,065
- This a marriage?
- Yes.
424
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:00,200
- One more time,
this a marriage?
425
00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:01,468
- Yes.
[laughter]
426
00:15:01,468 --> 00:15:02,802
- You know this a marriage,
and--
427
00:15:02,802 --> 00:15:04,704
- But I had the house
prior to the marriage.
428
00:15:04,704 --> 00:15:06,539
- I don't care.
But this is a marriage?
429
00:15:06,539 --> 00:15:08,107
- Yes.
430
00:15:08,107 --> 00:15:09,876
- Tiffny, I want to hear what
you got to say, girlfriend.
431
00:15:09,876 --> 00:15:13,646
- I will say that
I did commit those actions.
432
00:15:13,646 --> 00:15:15,114
- You took the $5,000?
- Yes.
433
00:15:15,114 --> 00:15:17,016
- What you do with the $5,000?
434
00:15:17,016 --> 00:15:19,219
- Um, I-I'll let you know.
435
00:15:19,219 --> 00:15:21,221
- Well, I'm here. Let me know.
[laughter]
436
00:15:21,221 --> 00:15:23,089
- Kevin does not know
I used the money
437
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:25,525
to take a girls trip
to Thailand.
438
00:15:25,525 --> 00:15:26,860
[audience murmurs]
- Thailand?
439
00:15:26,860 --> 00:15:28,228
Oh, that's nice.
440
00:15:28,228 --> 00:15:31,264
- I have not seen Kevin
since September 2022.
441
00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:32,832
- Oh.
442
00:15:32,832 --> 00:15:35,001
- We were in a bad place in
our marriage during that time.
443
00:15:35,001 --> 00:15:37,770
And the house fire
just escalated things
444
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:40,406
and broke down our
communication even further.
445
00:15:40,406 --> 00:15:41,841
- Oh, that's deep.
446
00:15:41,841 --> 00:15:43,743
- So what do you have to say,
Tiffny?
447
00:15:43,743 --> 00:15:46,279
You took the $5,000
out of the account.
448
00:15:46,279 --> 00:15:47,480
- Yes, ma'am, I did.
449
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,682
I was in a very low place
at that time.
450
00:15:49,682 --> 00:15:50,950
And I felt like I needed to
451
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,719
do some things for myself
with that money.
452
00:15:52,719 --> 00:15:54,554
- Did you do something to
make yourself happy
453
00:15:54,554 --> 00:15:55,755
with this $5,000?
454
00:15:55,755 --> 00:15:57,223
- While I was on my girls trip,
455
00:15:57,223 --> 00:15:59,025
I got a mommy makeover.
456
00:15:59,025 --> 00:16:00,894
- [gasps] What?
[audience murmurs]
457
00:16:00,894 --> 00:16:03,329
- And I also did it
for my marriage as well,
458
00:16:03,329 --> 00:16:06,165
to bring back the intimacy.
459
00:16:06,165 --> 00:16:07,600
- Oh, Lord.
- Ooh.
460
00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:08,601
- What'd you get?
461
00:16:08,601 --> 00:16:10,003
- I got everything.
462
00:16:10,003 --> 00:16:11,671
- You were supposed
to remodel your house.
463
00:16:11,671 --> 00:16:14,007
Instead, you went out
and remodeled your body?
464
00:16:14,007 --> 00:16:15,708
[laughter]
465
00:16:15,708 --> 00:16:17,377
- I have before
and after photos.
466
00:16:17,377 --> 00:16:19,279
Would you like to see them?
- Yeah, let me see 'em, girl.
467
00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:20,480
[suspenseful hip-hop music]
468
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:21,981
Let me see.
469
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,449
- Damn.
470
00:16:23,449 --> 00:16:24,450
♪ ♪
471
00:16:24,450 --> 00:16:26,052
- Ooh.
472
00:16:26,052 --> 00:16:27,554
According to
that first picture,
473
00:16:27,554 --> 00:16:28,788
she had three asses.
474
00:16:28,788 --> 00:16:30,623
- Yeah.
[laughter]
475
00:16:30,623 --> 00:16:32,425
- And she wanted
to connect them as one,
476
00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:35,261
which they are now.
[laughter]
477
00:16:35,261 --> 00:16:37,697
Have you hit it since
it been built like this?
478
00:16:37,697 --> 00:16:38,798
[laughter]
- I have not.
479
00:16:38,798 --> 00:16:40,199
I have not even seen her.
480
00:16:40,199 --> 00:16:42,936
- You haven't seen this?
- Ooh.
481
00:16:42,936 --> 00:16:45,071
- Oh, my--damn.
- She innocent!
482
00:16:45,071 --> 00:16:46,806
[laughter]
483
00:16:46,806 --> 00:16:48,174
- [chuckles]
484
00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:52,946
- Kevin Bookman is suing his
estranged wife for $5,000
485
00:16:52,946 --> 00:16:54,681
to replace
the fire insurance money
486
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:57,417
she straight up stole
out of their bank account.
487
00:16:57,417 --> 00:16:58,985
- You was supposed to
remodel your house.
488
00:16:58,985 --> 00:17:01,021
Instead, you went out
and remodeled your body?
489
00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:02,489
- Yes, ma'am.
490
00:17:02,489 --> 00:17:04,791
- And to throw even more fuel
on the flames,
491
00:17:04,791 --> 00:17:07,194
the poor guy hasn't even
gotten to see
492
00:17:07,194 --> 00:17:09,196
his wife's new body
until today.
493
00:17:09,196 --> 00:17:12,265
Ms. Pat is about
to extinguish it.
494
00:17:12,265 --> 00:17:15,502
[laughter]
- So this is what I remodeled.
495
00:17:15,502 --> 00:17:17,304
- Ooh.
496
00:17:17,304 --> 00:17:18,472
- And it match the thighs,
too.
497
00:17:18,472 --> 00:17:19,973
He did good.
- Mm-mm!
498
00:17:19,973 --> 00:17:22,209
[laughter]
- Thailand got it good.
499
00:17:22,209 --> 00:17:23,543
Y'all need to
stay out of Miami.
500
00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:25,846
Go to Thailand.
- That $5,000 was worth it.
501
00:17:25,846 --> 00:17:28,415
- OK, Stacey Dash,
put your clothes back on.
502
00:17:28,415 --> 00:17:29,683
[laughter]
503
00:17:29,683 --> 00:17:31,117
You barely looked at
your wife new body.
504
00:17:31,117 --> 00:17:33,487
You paid for it.
You should at least be--
505
00:17:33,487 --> 00:17:35,088
[laughter]
506
00:17:35,088 --> 00:17:36,089
Do you still love her?
507
00:17:36,089 --> 00:17:37,491
- I do.
all: Aw.
508
00:17:37,491 --> 00:17:39,659
- Is there anything that
could make it right for you?
509
00:17:39,659 --> 00:17:41,761
- In my mind, I've been
out of this marriage
510
00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:43,663
ever since
that situation happened.
511
00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:44,831
- Ooh.
512
00:17:44,831 --> 00:17:46,433
- It's going to take
a lot to rebuild
513
00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:49,536
that trust that was lost.
all: Aw.
514
00:17:49,536 --> 00:17:51,705
- So, jury, help me out here.
Help me out here.
515
00:17:51,705 --> 00:17:53,807
- She went from Aunt Jemima
to the Black Barbie.
516
00:17:53,807 --> 00:17:55,108
And I'm happy for you.
- Thank you.
517
00:17:55,108 --> 00:17:56,409
- You sound like a hustler.
518
00:17:56,409 --> 00:17:58,612
Why not just pay him back
his money?
519
00:17:58,612 --> 00:17:59,813
- She would have to go
into the joint account
520
00:17:59,813 --> 00:18:01,248
to take his money
to give him money.
521
00:18:01,248 --> 00:18:03,483
[laughter]
522
00:18:03,483 --> 00:18:05,118
- Kevin?
- Yes, ma'am.
523
00:18:05,118 --> 00:18:07,120
- Is there anything you want to
say before I make my decision?
524
00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:09,723
- As far as the future goes
with Tiffny, I don't know,
525
00:18:09,723 --> 00:18:11,658
you know--
I'm willing to go to counseling
526
00:18:11,658 --> 00:18:12,959
if she's willing to go
to counseling.
527
00:18:12,959 --> 00:18:14,995
But I don't know,
you know, where that'll go.
528
00:18:14,995 --> 00:18:16,863
- When you say I do,
529
00:18:16,863 --> 00:18:19,633
according to the laws in
this country, it's 50/50.
530
00:18:19,633 --> 00:18:21,668
The money she took out
of the joint account--
531
00:18:21,668 --> 00:18:23,336
it was a joint account.
532
00:18:23,336 --> 00:18:26,239
- Was she right?
I don't know. She your wife.
533
00:18:26,239 --> 00:18:28,208
I don't want to see you walk
away from your marriage
534
00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:29,276
over money.
535
00:18:29,276 --> 00:18:31,545
Tiffny, you took the money
536
00:18:31,545 --> 00:18:33,713
at a time when
he needed it most.
537
00:18:33,713 --> 00:18:35,115
That's why he's so hurt.
538
00:18:35,115 --> 00:18:36,116
So I'm going to settle this
right now.
539
00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:38,385
[dramatic hip-hop music]
540
00:18:38,385 --> 00:18:41,855
I'm ruling in favor of...
541
00:18:41,855 --> 00:18:43,390
the plaintiff, Kevin,
542
00:18:43,390 --> 00:18:45,692
for the full amount of $5,000.
543
00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:47,360
All you were thinking about is
544
00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:50,397
making sure you look good
and how you felt
545
00:18:50,397 --> 00:18:52,499
and you can't be like that
when you in a marriage.
546
00:18:52,499 --> 00:18:56,369
And we're going to get y'all
some marriage counseling.
547
00:18:56,369 --> 00:18:59,639
- I want to do counseling
as soon as possible.
548
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:01,207
And I want our family back.
549
00:19:01,207 --> 00:19:02,509
all: Aw.
550
00:19:02,509 --> 00:19:04,911
[applause]
- I like that. That was good.
551
00:19:04,911 --> 00:19:06,846
- Can I have a hug?
552
00:19:06,846 --> 00:19:08,281
- Aw.
553
00:19:08,281 --> 00:19:09,749
- You paid for it.
554
00:19:09,749 --> 00:19:13,286
Oh, there you go.
- Hey!
555
00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:15,655
Do it feel like 5K?
556
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:17,324
[laughter]
Do it feel like 5K?
557
00:19:17,324 --> 00:19:20,393
- [smooches]
all: Aw.
558
00:19:20,393 --> 00:19:21,861
- He got a little smile
on his face.
559
00:19:21,861 --> 00:19:24,297
That body feel good, didn't it?
- I can back it up.
560
00:19:24,297 --> 00:19:26,366
- I'm quite sure you can.
You got one ass now.
561
00:19:26,366 --> 00:19:28,802
- Yeah.
[laughter]
562
00:19:31,138 --> 00:19:32,472
- Have you ever
watched your kids before?
563
00:19:32,472 --> 00:19:33,640
- Of course, yeah. They'd
be fighting all the time.
564
00:19:33,640 --> 00:19:35,075
It's hard to break up
the fights.
565
00:19:35,075 --> 00:19:36,843
- I can tell from her hair dye
those kids are bad.
566
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:38,612
[laughter]
567
00:19:38,612 --> 00:19:39,913
Are you still paying on
568
00:19:39,913 --> 00:19:41,047
the two, three rings
that y'all done lost?
569
00:19:41,047 --> 00:19:42,249
- I'm still paying
on the rings.
570
00:19:42,249 --> 00:19:43,650
- So what you want me
to do, spank her?
571
00:19:43,650 --> 00:19:44,818
[laughter]
572
00:19:44,818 --> 00:19:46,186
- What's his is mine.
We brothers.
573
00:19:46,186 --> 00:19:48,455
- All I could do was pray.
I can't do nothing else.
574
00:19:48,455 --> 00:19:50,757
You don't tell me
how to love my child.
575
00:19:50,757 --> 00:19:53,226
- OK, now, I got to settle this
once and for all.