1 00:00:01,101 --> 00:00:02,402 - You ain't never met a judge like me. 2 00:00:02,402 --> 00:00:03,903 - Your Honor! Your Honor! 3 00:00:03,903 --> 00:00:06,039 - Shut the hell up and let me get this thing together. 4 00:00:06,039 --> 00:00:07,774 Hey, y'all. I'm Ms. Pat. 5 00:00:07,774 --> 00:00:10,543 I know the inside of a courtroom. 6 00:00:10,543 --> 00:00:12,512 Went to jail for selling cocaine. 7 00:00:12,512 --> 00:00:14,748 Now here I am 25 years later 8 00:00:14,748 --> 00:00:16,416 sitting on this side of the bench. 9 00:00:16,416 --> 00:00:17,617 - Put my faith in your hands. 10 00:00:17,617 --> 00:00:18,852 - Don't put your faith in my hand. 11 00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:20,220 I ain't God. I don't love you. 12 00:00:20,220 --> 00:00:22,222 I'm using everything I learned on the streets-- 13 00:00:22,222 --> 00:00:23,523 Don't nobody owe you nothing. 14 00:00:23,523 --> 00:00:25,458 --to solve these feuds that are tearing 15 00:00:25,458 --> 00:00:27,460 real family and friends apart. 16 00:00:27,460 --> 00:00:28,728 - I ain't care what he find out. 17 00:00:28,728 --> 00:00:30,063 What's his is mine. - We ain't married. 18 00:00:30,063 --> 00:00:31,798 - We brothers. - Hey! 19 00:00:31,798 --> 00:00:34,834 These are real cases with real money on the line. 20 00:00:34,834 --> 00:00:36,369 What would you do with the $5,000? 21 00:00:36,369 --> 00:00:37,470 - I-- I'll let you know. 22 00:00:37,470 --> 00:00:38,471 - Well, I'm here. 23 00:00:38,471 --> 00:00:39,906 Let me know. 24 00:00:39,906 --> 00:00:41,341 And I'm bringing my own family and friends 25 00:00:41,341 --> 00:00:42,642 to court as my jury. 26 00:00:42,642 --> 00:00:44,310 Their opinions are like diarrhea-- 27 00:00:44,310 --> 00:00:45,345 it belongs in the toilet. 28 00:00:45,345 --> 00:00:46,913 - You're out of order. 29 00:00:46,913 --> 00:00:48,815 Matter of fact, this whole damn courtroom is out of order! 30 00:00:48,815 --> 00:00:51,718 - Y'all may have started it, but I'm going to sell it. 31 00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:53,186 - Let's just wrap this up, because I'm 32 00:00:53,186 --> 00:00:54,421 getting very irritated. 33 00:00:54,421 --> 00:00:55,722 - You keep running your mouth, 34 00:00:55,722 --> 00:00:57,323 you ain't going to get nothing. 35 00:00:57,323 --> 00:00:58,925 Court is now in session. 36 00:00:58,925 --> 00:01:01,261 Baby, don't do me, do Jesus, because he got 37 00:01:01,261 --> 00:01:02,829 more patience with you, OK? 38 00:01:02,829 --> 00:01:06,232 [dramatic music] 39 00:01:06,232 --> 00:01:10,003 - Please rise for the judge who is always right, 40 00:01:10,003 --> 00:01:11,938 even when she's wrong, 41 00:01:11,938 --> 00:01:14,107 the Honorable Ms. Pat. 42 00:01:14,107 --> 00:01:16,876 - Thank you. Thank you. Just sit on down. 43 00:01:16,876 --> 00:01:19,579 All right, jury, let's have some fun. 44 00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:21,047 Y'all ready? 45 00:01:21,047 --> 00:01:23,283 - Tell the truth and shame the devil. 46 00:01:23,283 --> 00:01:24,284 - Come on, bailiff. 47 00:01:24,284 --> 00:01:25,585 Do the damn thing. 48 00:01:25,585 --> 00:01:29,389 - This is the case of Majett versus Garci. 49 00:01:29,389 --> 00:01:30,790 You may now enter. 50 00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:33,193 - Plaintiff Leon Majett owns a limo service 51 00:01:33,193 --> 00:01:36,729 and is suing his friend Garcetta for $450 52 00:01:36,729 --> 00:01:40,066 claiming she stiffed him on a bill for a night on the town. 53 00:01:40,066 --> 00:01:41,267 - I like the outfit. 54 00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:42,869 - He got the outfit from Lane Bryant. 55 00:01:42,869 --> 00:01:45,038 [laughter] 56 00:01:45,038 --> 00:01:47,674 - But defendant Garcietta Garci says 57 00:01:47,674 --> 00:01:50,243 Leon rolled up in a filthy vehicle, 58 00:01:50,243 --> 00:01:52,712 and she's not about riding dirty. 59 00:01:52,712 --> 00:01:55,215 [dramatic music] 60 00:01:55,215 --> 00:01:56,749 - OK, before we get started, I just 61 00:01:56,749 --> 00:01:59,285 want to let you know that this is a jury of my peers, OK? 62 00:01:59,285 --> 00:02:00,587 They're going to say some things 63 00:02:00,587 --> 00:02:03,389 that you might not like, like your haircut 64 00:02:03,389 --> 00:02:04,791 was overdue last week. 65 00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:07,594 [laughter] 66 00:02:07,594 --> 00:02:09,162 But don't pay them no attention, OK? 67 00:02:09,162 --> 00:02:10,163 Only I count. 68 00:02:10,163 --> 00:02:11,164 - OK. 69 00:02:11,164 --> 00:02:12,465 - All right. 70 00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:13,766 Mr. Leon, can you tell us why we're here today? 71 00:02:13,766 --> 00:02:18,705 - I am here today to sue my friend for $450. 72 00:02:18,705 --> 00:02:20,640 She had rented out my car service, 73 00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:22,509 and I also sell soul food tamales. 74 00:02:22,509 --> 00:02:23,877 She ordered some tamales. 75 00:02:23,877 --> 00:02:25,712 - You put collard greens in tamales? 76 00:02:25,712 --> 00:02:27,614 - And smoked turkey. You know, she's my friend. 77 00:02:27,614 --> 00:02:28,948 I gave her a good deal. 78 00:02:28,948 --> 00:02:31,684 And once I started talking about the payment, 79 00:02:31,684 --> 00:02:33,953 that's when it kind of went sideways, so... 80 00:02:33,953 --> 00:02:35,388 - Garci? 81 00:02:35,388 --> 00:02:38,358 - It was a bachelorette party, so I hired a car service 82 00:02:38,358 --> 00:02:41,327 so we could, you know, get faded and have a good night 83 00:02:41,327 --> 00:02:42,395 and nobody had to drive home. 84 00:02:42,395 --> 00:02:43,496 He was late. 85 00:02:43,496 --> 00:02:44,797 He showed up with the car dirty. 86 00:02:44,797 --> 00:02:46,933 The tamales made us sick. 87 00:02:46,933 --> 00:02:48,201 I haven't had tamales since. 88 00:02:48,201 --> 00:02:49,969 - Did it seem like they had a good time? 89 00:02:49,969 --> 00:02:52,005 - I got videos showing they had a good time. 90 00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:53,106 - Let me see this video. 91 00:02:53,106 --> 00:02:54,240 - Oh, yeah. - Hey. 92 00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:55,241 - Hey. Hey. - Turned up. 93 00:02:55,241 --> 00:02:56,276 - We all took tamales. 94 00:02:56,276 --> 00:02:57,577 You know what it feels like, girl. 95 00:02:57,577 --> 00:02:59,145 - Ooh, she took a big bite. 96 00:02:59,145 --> 00:03:00,747 - Thumbs up. - That tamale's up. 97 00:03:00,747 --> 00:03:02,081 - Thumbs up. - Hm. 98 00:03:02,081 --> 00:03:04,083 - Hm. - Hm. 99 00:03:04,083 --> 00:03:05,652 How was the tamales? 100 00:03:05,652 --> 00:03:06,920 - Thumbs down. 101 00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,221 - Not the way y'all was sucking them up. 102 00:03:08,221 --> 00:03:09,656 - You didn't see me sucking none of them. 103 00:03:09,656 --> 00:03:11,624 - I couldn't tell who you was in that video. 104 00:03:11,624 --> 00:03:13,626 I could see the back teeth, so that mean it was good. 105 00:03:13,626 --> 00:03:14,827 - Yeah, big mouth in the toilet. 106 00:03:14,827 --> 00:03:16,162 - Tell me, why was the vehicle dirty? 107 00:03:16,162 --> 00:03:17,163 - He was late. 108 00:03:17,163 --> 00:03:18,464 I hired him for 7:00. 109 00:03:18,464 --> 00:03:19,999 He got there well after that-- 110 00:03:19,999 --> 00:03:22,602 9:00-ish, after 9:00. 111 00:03:22,602 --> 00:03:24,404 - Do you have any proof he was late? 112 00:03:24,404 --> 00:03:26,406 - I have a whole text message-- thank you for asking-- 113 00:03:26,406 --> 00:03:28,107 - All right, bailiff, let me see this text message. 114 00:03:28,107 --> 00:03:29,309 - --that he sent me. 115 00:03:29,309 --> 00:03:30,343 - Do you remember sending this, Leon? 116 00:03:30,343 --> 00:03:31,544 - Yes, ma'am. 117 00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:32,545 - He was supposed to be there at 7:00. 118 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:33,846 - Hold on, Leon. - Go ahead. 119 00:03:33,846 --> 00:03:34,781 Go ahead, talk to me now. [indistinct chatter] 120 00:03:34,781 --> 00:03:36,215 - I'm gonna talk to you. 121 00:03:36,215 --> 00:03:38,217 - He dropping off tamales on the way while we waiting. 122 00:03:38,217 --> 00:03:39,786 And look at what time it was though. 123 00:03:39,786 --> 00:03:40,954 - 8:26. 124 00:03:40,954 --> 00:03:42,288 - He's supposed to be there at 7:00. 125 00:03:42,288 --> 00:03:44,991 - She said, "Be here by 9:00, because don't 126 00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:47,193 no clubs start at 7:00." 127 00:03:47,193 --> 00:03:48,194 - Oh, that's true. 128 00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:49,495 That's true. 129 00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:50,830 - At 7:00 he was supposed to get there. 130 00:03:50,830 --> 00:03:52,265 We were going to just tour through the city 131 00:03:52,265 --> 00:03:53,766 while we were eating the tamales, while we 132 00:03:53,766 --> 00:03:54,901 were popping champagne. 133 00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,269 When I saw the champagne that he brought, 134 00:03:56,269 --> 00:03:58,171 which was cheap and we did not drink that, I-- 135 00:03:58,171 --> 00:03:59,706 - What did he buy, girl? - It was some-- 136 00:03:59,706 --> 00:04:00,707 - Boone's Farm? 137 00:04:00,707 --> 00:04:02,475 - Pretty much. 138 00:04:02,475 --> 00:04:04,277 - I see you got a witness here, ma'am. 139 00:04:04,277 --> 00:04:05,745 Can you come on up, please? 140 00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:07,680 Are you the bride that was celebrating on this night? 141 00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:08,815 - I'm the wife now. 142 00:04:08,815 --> 00:04:10,149 - Let's talk about that night. 143 00:04:10,149 --> 00:04:11,384 How did it go down? 144 00:04:11,384 --> 00:04:13,086 - Once we got done eating, it was-- it 145 00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:14,654 was kind of getting awkward. 146 00:04:14,654 --> 00:04:17,056 Like, kind of put off with the music that was being played. 147 00:04:17,056 --> 00:04:18,257 Again, I was kind of-- 148 00:04:18,257 --> 00:04:19,325 - Y'all didn't like the music either? 149 00:04:19,325 --> 00:04:20,693 - No. 150 00:04:20,693 --> 00:04:22,795 Turns out that it's his music he was playing. 151 00:04:22,795 --> 00:04:24,664 - Yeah! 152 00:04:24,664 --> 00:04:26,065 Yeah! 153 00:04:26,065 --> 00:04:27,834 - He's a bootleg Drake. 154 00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:29,836 So he was singing and rapping. 155 00:04:29,836 --> 00:04:31,004 - Let me hear something. 156 00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:32,171 - I'm like a big guy. - Go ahead. 157 00:04:32,171 --> 00:04:33,506 - Do the song, man. 158 00:04:33,506 --> 00:04:36,309 - I do a song about going into restaurants, 159 00:04:36,309 --> 00:04:38,144 and they always put me in booths, you know? 160 00:04:38,144 --> 00:04:39,879 And I tell them, I don't do no booth. 161 00:04:39,879 --> 00:04:41,247 So I do a callback. 162 00:04:41,247 --> 00:04:42,515 I say, I don't do no booth. 163 00:04:42,515 --> 00:04:43,616 You say-- 164 00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:44,784 [together] I don't do no booth. 165 00:04:44,784 --> 00:04:47,153 - And I say, put me at a table, lady. 166 00:04:47,153 --> 00:04:48,554 [together] Put me at a table, lady. 167 00:04:48,554 --> 00:04:50,723 - Because that booth be hurting my navel, baby. 168 00:04:50,723 --> 00:04:52,025 [laughter] - Hey. 169 00:04:52,025 --> 00:04:53,826 Hey. Hey. 170 00:04:53,826 --> 00:04:55,128 - That did not belong-- - That sounds like a hit! 171 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:56,729 - --that night. - But they were jamming. 172 00:04:56,729 --> 00:04:57,930 They were jamming. 173 00:04:57,930 --> 00:04:58,898 They was like, "I don't do no booth." 174 00:04:58,898 --> 00:05:00,000 - Oh. - Hey. 175 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:00,266 - Oh. - Hey. 176 00:05:00,266 --> 00:05:01,601 [together] I don't do no booth. - Not that night. 177 00:05:01,601 --> 00:05:02,835 - I said... [together] I don't do no booth. 178 00:05:02,835 --> 00:05:04,070 - Hey! [together] I don't do no booth. 179 00:05:04,070 --> 00:05:05,171 - I said... 180 00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:06,773 [together] Put me at a table, lady. 181 00:05:06,773 --> 00:05:08,141 Put me at a table. 182 00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:09,942 Because that booth be hurting my navel, baby. 183 00:05:09,942 --> 00:05:11,244 - Huh. - Hey. 184 00:05:11,244 --> 00:05:12,311 [applause] 185 00:05:12,311 --> 00:05:13,312 - I don't do no booth. 186 00:05:13,312 --> 00:05:15,214 - Yes! 187 00:05:15,214 --> 00:05:16,749 So overall, how would you rate the night? 188 00:05:16,749 --> 00:05:18,351 Come on, be honest. This is a Black-owned business. 189 00:05:18,351 --> 00:05:19,519 - I will be honest. 190 00:05:19,519 --> 00:05:21,154 Nine. 191 00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:22,488 - She mad she brought her. 192 00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:24,757 - I don't know what he was telling you, lady. 193 00:05:24,757 --> 00:05:27,193 - Your witness just said the service was a nine. 194 00:05:27,193 --> 00:05:28,995 - I would understand that, being that she was 195 00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:30,496 surprised by the whole thing. 196 00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:32,031 She didn't know what time things were supposed to start. 197 00:05:32,031 --> 00:05:33,299 She didn't know how much I was paying. 198 00:05:33,299 --> 00:05:34,500 She didn't see a dirty car. 199 00:05:34,500 --> 00:05:36,302 I was providing that nine for her. 200 00:05:36,302 --> 00:05:39,038 I expect Black excellence, and he did not provide that. 201 00:05:39,038 --> 00:05:40,573 That's all I'm saying. - All right, witness. 202 00:05:40,573 --> 00:05:41,574 Thank you so much. 203 00:05:41,574 --> 00:05:42,975 - Thank you. 204 00:05:42,975 --> 00:05:44,310 - When you're dealing with people that you know, 205 00:05:44,310 --> 00:05:46,846 they expect way more than what they pay for. 206 00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:49,582 So therefore, you need a contract. 207 00:05:49,582 --> 00:05:50,917 OK? 208 00:05:50,917 --> 00:05:52,585 If that was a regular person, you could have 209 00:05:52,585 --> 00:05:53,986 charged their credit card. 210 00:05:53,986 --> 00:05:55,555 But she didn't even pay you. 211 00:05:55,555 --> 00:05:58,858 Then she ate your tamales, claimed she got sick, 212 00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:01,794 dirty up your car, and still complain. 213 00:06:01,794 --> 00:06:03,696 But you also can't be putting on your music, 214 00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:05,832 because everybody don't want to hear about your navel. 215 00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:08,134 Miss Garci, he bought you mints, 216 00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:09,469 he bought you cheap wine. 217 00:06:09,469 --> 00:06:11,170 He'd been at the store all day 218 00:06:11,170 --> 00:06:13,206 in his backyard making y'all tamales. 219 00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:16,342 He did everything that he thought he should do. 220 00:06:16,342 --> 00:06:17,910 And see, God don't like ugly. 221 00:06:17,910 --> 00:06:20,413 Because them tamales was so good that that lady 222 00:06:20,413 --> 00:06:21,414 couldn't lie back there. 223 00:06:21,414 --> 00:06:22,415 You talkin' 'bout a seven. 224 00:06:22,415 --> 00:06:23,583 She said, "Girl, you lying. 225 00:06:23,583 --> 00:06:25,518 That service was a nine." 226 00:06:25,518 --> 00:06:27,220 So I'ma settle this right now. 227 00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:30,022 [dramatic music] 228 00:06:30,022 --> 00:06:31,758 I'm ruling in favor of-- 229 00:06:31,758 --> 00:06:34,694 ♪ ♪ 230 00:06:34,694 --> 00:06:38,731 --the plaintiff, Leon, for $450. 231 00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:39,766 Let's go, Leon. 232 00:06:39,766 --> 00:06:41,467 - Pay that man. 233 00:06:41,467 --> 00:06:42,668 [laughter] 234 00:06:42,668 --> 00:06:44,170 - All you had to do was pay the man. 235 00:06:44,170 --> 00:06:45,872 Now that settles it. [gavel bangs] 236 00:06:45,872 --> 00:06:47,340 - Amen. 237 00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:48,808 - Hey, on your way out, let me hear that song again. 238 00:06:48,808 --> 00:06:49,809 - All right. 239 00:06:49,809 --> 00:06:51,377 I don't do no booth. 240 00:06:51,377 --> 00:06:53,045 - Hey. [together] I don't do no booth. 241 00:06:53,045 --> 00:06:54,947 - Put me at a table, lady. 242 00:06:54,947 --> 00:06:56,349 [together] Put me at a table, lady. 243 00:06:56,349 --> 00:06:58,317 - Because that booth be hurting my navel, baby. 244 00:06:58,317 --> 00:07:01,320 [together] Because that booth be hurting my navel, baby. 245 00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:02,688 - Get your ass on outta here. 246 00:07:02,688 --> 00:07:03,990 [applause] 247 00:07:03,990 --> 00:07:05,892 - Go ahead, Leon. 248 00:07:05,892 --> 00:07:07,827 - How many of y'all think Leon was hitting it? 249 00:07:07,827 --> 00:07:08,828 - Look it at that's; it's crazy, ain't it? 250 00:07:08,828 --> 00:07:10,029 - [laughs] 251 00:07:10,029 --> 00:07:12,331 - She get-- she getting all the tamales. 252 00:07:12,331 --> 00:07:14,901 - He's bringing the feel good. 253 00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:15,902 [laughter] 254 00:07:15,902 --> 00:07:17,203 - Oh! 255 00:07:17,203 --> 00:07:18,805 - No men were allowed in any of our rooms. 256 00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:21,240 - They don't be opposed, Your Honor, when they be watching. 257 00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:22,275 [together] Ohh. 258 00:07:22,275 --> 00:07:23,476 - This took a turn. 259 00:07:23,476 --> 00:07:26,345 - Tell me how this is worth $2,500. 260 00:07:26,345 --> 00:07:29,549 When they made this watch 100 years ago, it was a nickel. 261 00:07:29,549 --> 00:07:31,651 [laughter] 262 00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:34,821 - Y'all get this next case. 263 00:07:34,821 --> 00:07:36,622 I got [bleep] to do. 264 00:07:36,622 --> 00:07:38,324 All right, jury, please contribute 265 00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:39,692 something good today. 266 00:07:39,692 --> 00:07:40,660 Because if you don't, I'ma gonna have to lock 267 00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:41,961 you up in my fake jail. 268 00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:43,529 - Better than the real jail I've been going to. 269 00:07:43,529 --> 00:07:44,931 [laughter] 270 00:07:44,931 --> 00:07:48,101 - This is the case of Garrett versus Roberts. 271 00:07:48,101 --> 00:07:49,435 You may now enter. 272 00:07:49,435 --> 00:07:51,504 - Plaintiff Stephanie Garrett is suing 273 00:07:51,504 --> 00:07:53,873 her friend Shawndra for $250. 274 00:07:53,873 --> 00:07:56,809 Because she claims Shawndra kicked her out of her hotel 275 00:07:56,809 --> 00:07:58,611 room when she met a man at a club 276 00:07:58,611 --> 00:08:00,012 during their recent girls' trip 277 00:08:00,012 --> 00:08:01,681 to the Dominican Republic. 278 00:08:01,681 --> 00:08:04,851 Defendant Shawndra Roberts claims she didn't kick anyone 279 00:08:04,851 --> 00:08:07,353 out of the room and that Stephanie left on her own, 280 00:08:07,353 --> 00:08:09,756 so she doesn't owe her anything. 281 00:08:12,759 --> 00:08:13,893 - So let's get started. 282 00:08:13,893 --> 00:08:15,194 Miss Garrett, why are you here? 283 00:08:15,194 --> 00:08:16,963 - I'm here today to sue my friend Shawndra 284 00:08:16,963 --> 00:08:19,699 for $250 for breaking our contract 285 00:08:19,699 --> 00:08:21,934 on a girls' trip to DR. 286 00:08:21,934 --> 00:08:24,837 One of the rules in that contract was that no men were 287 00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:26,472 allowed in any of our rooms. 288 00:08:26,472 --> 00:08:27,507 She broke that rule. 289 00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:29,108 - Oh. - Oh. 290 00:08:29,108 --> 00:08:31,644 - That, in turn, caused me to have to sleep somewhere else. 291 00:08:31,644 --> 00:08:34,080 So I'm suing her for the $250, which is 292 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:35,281 one night's stay in that room. 293 00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:36,649 - Shawndra, how you respond to what 294 00:08:36,649 --> 00:08:37,784 your friend is saying here? 295 00:08:37,784 --> 00:08:39,519 - I agree with the contract. 296 00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:41,254 However, she violated it, too. 297 00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:43,189 She put all our business in the street. 298 00:08:43,189 --> 00:08:44,690 I don't feel like I owe her nothing. 299 00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:47,293 - Any vacation you got to sign an NDA to go on sound 300 00:08:47,293 --> 00:08:48,461 like a good vacation to me. 301 00:08:48,461 --> 00:08:49,662 - It definitely is. - It sure is. 302 00:08:49,662 --> 00:08:50,663 [laughter] 303 00:08:50,663 --> 00:08:51,998 - All right. 304 00:08:51,998 --> 00:08:53,599 Stephanie, how long have y'all known each other? 305 00:08:53,599 --> 00:08:55,301 - We've been friends for five years. 306 00:08:55,301 --> 00:08:56,402 - Has she ever act a fool before? 307 00:08:56,402 --> 00:08:57,403 - Always. 308 00:08:57,403 --> 00:08:58,604 - I'm off the chain, y'all. 309 00:08:58,604 --> 00:08:59,939 [laughter] 310 00:08:59,939 --> 00:09:02,475 - So what happened on the other trip that made you 311 00:09:02,475 --> 00:09:03,910 want to come up with this NDA? 312 00:09:03,910 --> 00:09:05,478 - Some people went back and kind of 313 00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:08,181 told their spouses what happened on our previous trip. 314 00:09:08,181 --> 00:09:10,316 So we were like, oh, we can't have this. 315 00:09:10,316 --> 00:09:11,851 - No, give me an example, girlfriend. 316 00:09:11,851 --> 00:09:12,852 Don't stop now. 317 00:09:12,852 --> 00:09:14,220 - OK. 318 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,588 - I want to hear her dirt. 319 00:09:15,588 --> 00:09:16,856 - It's a lot. 320 00:09:16,856 --> 00:09:18,224 - But they don't be opposed, Your Honor, 321 00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:19,959 when they be watching. - [gasps] 322 00:09:19,959 --> 00:09:21,160 - Oh! 323 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:23,029 - I've never watched you. - Oh. 324 00:09:23,029 --> 00:09:24,030 - This took a turn. 325 00:09:24,030 --> 00:09:25,498 [laughter] 326 00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:26,933 - All right. 327 00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:28,501 Stephanie, you got some evidence of this contract? 328 00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:29,936 - Yes, ma'am, I do have. 329 00:09:29,936 --> 00:09:32,205 - According to this contract, it sound like NDA stands 330 00:09:32,205 --> 00:09:33,840 for "No [bleep] Allowed." 331 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:35,341 I got to get me one of these. 332 00:09:35,341 --> 00:09:37,109 [laughter] 333 00:09:37,109 --> 00:09:38,177 - It's called marriage. 334 00:09:38,177 --> 00:09:39,645 - Wow. 335 00:09:39,645 --> 00:09:41,814 - What's the other terms in this contract, Stephanie? 336 00:09:41,814 --> 00:09:43,316 Punta Cana Girls' Trip. 337 00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:44,517 - Yeah, no complaining. 338 00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:46,452 No guys are allowed in the room. 339 00:09:46,452 --> 00:09:48,855 You can only call your spouse, your husband or your children 340 00:09:48,855 --> 00:09:49,922 once a day. 341 00:09:49,922 --> 00:09:51,557 - On the contract in number three, 342 00:09:51,557 --> 00:09:54,560 it says "be a team player." 343 00:09:54,560 --> 00:09:55,761 - Thank you. 344 00:09:55,761 --> 00:09:57,563 - OK, so you got to the DR-- - Uh-huh. 345 00:09:57,563 --> 00:09:58,564 - --and you met somebody? 346 00:09:58,564 --> 00:10:00,132 - Mm-hmm. 347 00:10:00,132 --> 00:10:01,634 - So you both had left the room because he's fine as hell. 348 00:10:01,634 --> 00:10:02,635 Hey! 349 00:10:02,635 --> 00:10:06,339 [laughter] 350 00:10:08,574 --> 00:10:10,309 - Well, Your Honor, it wasn't quite like that. 351 00:10:10,309 --> 00:10:12,845 He wanted to make sure all the ladies got back to the hotel. 352 00:10:12,845 --> 00:10:16,482 And I was like, "You coming inside?" 353 00:10:16,482 --> 00:10:18,117 - Ain't nothing like that tropical thing. 354 00:10:18,117 --> 00:10:19,819 [laughter] 355 00:10:19,819 --> 00:10:21,420 - Stephanie, what did you do and say? 356 00:10:21,420 --> 00:10:23,656 - I said, "Girl, like, where I'm supposed to go?" 357 00:10:23,656 --> 00:10:25,024 "I don't care where you go. 358 00:10:25,024 --> 00:10:27,059 You better figure it out, because he's staying." 359 00:10:27,059 --> 00:10:28,528 - So where did you go? 360 00:10:28,528 --> 00:10:30,263 - One of the other individuals that were on the trip 361 00:10:30,263 --> 00:10:31,631 as well, I went to her room. 362 00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:32,632 - How long was you there? 363 00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,934 - Till 2:00 the next day. 364 00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:37,136 - Ooh, he must have had three blue pills that night. 365 00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:39,605 [laughter] 366 00:10:39,605 --> 00:10:40,873 - I don't think he had a blue pill. 367 00:10:40,873 --> 00:10:42,975 I think he had that gas station [bleep]. 368 00:10:42,975 --> 00:10:45,778 [laughter] 369 00:10:45,778 --> 00:10:49,215 Shawndra, you brought your evidence to court with you. 370 00:10:49,215 --> 00:10:50,416 - Yeah, we want to hear the witness. 371 00:10:50,416 --> 00:10:51,551 [applauding] - Yeah. 372 00:10:51,551 --> 00:10:52,952 - Get up here. 373 00:10:52,952 --> 00:10:54,987 Please state your full name for the courts. 374 00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:56,522 - My name is John Hays. 375 00:10:56,522 --> 00:10:58,324 - Tell me what happened that night from your perspective, 376 00:10:58,324 --> 00:11:00,459 where you would come in and just take over somebody's room 377 00:11:00,459 --> 00:11:02,228 and lay medicated pipe. 378 00:11:02,228 --> 00:11:04,430 [laughter] 379 00:11:04,430 --> 00:11:05,598 - I ain't put out. 380 00:11:05,598 --> 00:11:06,899 I took her back to the room. 381 00:11:06,899 --> 00:11:08,434 It just so happened they were together. 382 00:11:08,434 --> 00:11:10,303 To cut the story, I wanted her. 383 00:11:10,303 --> 00:11:11,904 - Oh. - Oh! 384 00:11:11,904 --> 00:11:12,905 - Ooh. 385 00:11:12,905 --> 00:11:14,240 [laughter] 386 00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:15,875 - She looked at me like I was crazy. 387 00:11:15,875 --> 00:11:17,843 - That could have been getting the [bleep] that night. 388 00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:20,513 [laughter] 389 00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:23,082 - Maybe that's why she mad about it. 390 00:11:23,082 --> 00:11:24,083 - Yeah. 391 00:11:24,083 --> 00:11:26,319 [laughter] 392 00:11:26,319 --> 00:11:27,620 - Go sit down. 393 00:11:27,620 --> 00:11:29,455 All right, jury, come on. Help me out here. 394 00:11:29,455 --> 00:11:30,556 What do y'all think? 395 00:11:30,556 --> 00:11:31,557 Ray J? 396 00:11:31,557 --> 00:11:33,359 - It's real simple. 397 00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:35,695 Take one for the team. 398 00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:36,696 [laughter] 399 00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:39,498 [applause] 400 00:11:39,498 --> 00:11:41,233 - Shawndra, you got any final words? 401 00:11:41,233 --> 00:11:44,937 - You need to loosen up, have a good time, let your hair down. 402 00:11:44,937 --> 00:11:47,306 And I don't feel like I need to be sued, because I 403 00:11:47,306 --> 00:11:48,307 didn't tell her to leave. 404 00:11:48,307 --> 00:11:49,709 She left voluntarily. 405 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:51,444 - So was you still going to get it on if she stayed? 406 00:11:51,444 --> 00:11:52,445 - Yeah! 407 00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:55,648 - Ooh. 408 00:11:55,648 --> 00:11:58,250 - Who want to watch this old-ass pole? 409 00:11:58,250 --> 00:12:01,020 [laughter] 410 00:12:04,190 --> 00:12:07,693 Even the audience got their hands up. 411 00:12:07,693 --> 00:12:09,328 Y'all going to hell. 412 00:12:09,328 --> 00:12:11,831 Stephanie, what do "be a team player" mean? 413 00:12:11,831 --> 00:12:14,133 - It means look out for your girl, that's what we thinking. 414 00:12:14,133 --> 00:12:16,135 - See, that's why you got to start hanging out with people 415 00:12:16,135 --> 00:12:17,269 that look different from you. 416 00:12:17,269 --> 00:12:18,337 You don't go and hang out with nobody 417 00:12:18,337 --> 00:12:19,505 with no little bit of weight. 418 00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:20,606 You hang out with fat bitches so you 419 00:12:20,606 --> 00:12:22,241 can be the nicest looking one. 420 00:12:22,241 --> 00:12:24,310 [laughter] 421 00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:26,012 You can't be bringing the competition 422 00:12:26,012 --> 00:12:29,215 to the beach with you, and get mad when jungle [bleep] 423 00:12:29,215 --> 00:12:31,000 chose her over you. 424 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:31,751 chose her over you. 425 00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:34,186 And, Shawndra, if you wanted it that bad, 426 00:12:34,186 --> 00:12:35,688 you could have did it in the elevator. 427 00:12:35,688 --> 00:12:37,023 You could have did it in your car. 428 00:12:37,023 --> 00:12:38,157 You could have did it in the hood. 429 00:12:38,157 --> 00:12:39,692 You could have did it anywhere. 430 00:12:39,692 --> 00:12:41,160 Sir, it's nasty. 431 00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:42,762 And you was being cheap. 432 00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:45,164 But whatever you given her, she's smiling, and she's happy. 433 00:12:45,164 --> 00:12:46,866 [laughter] 434 00:12:46,866 --> 00:12:50,870 But what y'all gave her, she's very upset. 435 00:12:50,870 --> 00:12:52,738 I'm going to settle this once and for all. 436 00:12:52,738 --> 00:12:55,307 [dramatic music] 437 00:12:55,307 --> 00:12:57,109 I'm ruling in favor of-- 438 00:12:57,109 --> 00:12:58,511 ♪ ♪ 439 00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:01,781 --the plaintiff, Stephanie, for $250. 440 00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:02,882 - Thank you. 441 00:13:02,882 --> 00:13:04,250 - For your freaky-ass friend. 442 00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:05,718 - Thank you. 443 00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:07,653 - Don't be mad about paying $250, because y'all did 444 00:13:07,653 --> 00:13:08,954 kick her out of her room. 445 00:13:08,954 --> 00:13:10,056 - You are dismissed. 446 00:13:10,056 --> 00:13:12,858 ♪ ♪ 447 00:13:12,858 --> 00:13:15,227 - So one time I was sharing this room with a comedian. 448 00:13:15,227 --> 00:13:16,829 I was just started to go on the road, 449 00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:18,831 so I didn't know anything about sleeping for gigs and stuff. 450 00:13:18,831 --> 00:13:20,199 - Yeah. 451 00:13:20,199 --> 00:13:21,934 - So I look up, and she got this [bleep] white 452 00:13:21,934 --> 00:13:24,236 man who owned the club, and he was like, 453 00:13:24,236 --> 00:13:25,237 "Do you want to join in?" 454 00:13:25,237 --> 00:13:26,338 I'm like, "In what?" 455 00:13:26,338 --> 00:13:27,707 [laughter] 456 00:13:27,707 --> 00:13:29,008 I didn't have nowhere to go. 457 00:13:29,008 --> 00:13:30,676 Because at the time, I'm a broke-ass comedian. 458 00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:32,511 I turned my back and put that pillow on my head, 459 00:13:32,511 --> 00:13:33,579 act like I ain't hear nothing. 460 00:13:33,579 --> 00:13:36,082 [laughter] 461 00:13:36,082 --> 00:13:38,751 Baby, I mind my business. 462 00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:39,752 - You're a team player. 463 00:13:39,752 --> 00:13:42,321 - You're the team player. 464 00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:43,656 - How did the watch break? 465 00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,991 Because it looked like it was under stress. 466 00:13:45,991 --> 00:13:47,226 - I don't know how it got broken. 467 00:13:47,226 --> 00:13:48,627 - Your wrist choked it out. 468 00:13:50,730 --> 00:13:52,832 - Jury, my life experiences make me 469 00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:55,134 qualified to judge any damn thing that walks 470 00:13:55,134 --> 00:13:56,302 and move on this Earth. 471 00:13:56,302 --> 00:13:57,637 - You did get shot in the head. 472 00:13:57,637 --> 00:13:59,072 - So let's get to judging. 473 00:13:59,072 --> 00:14:00,606 And bailiff, get to bailiffing. 474 00:14:00,606 --> 00:14:04,811 - [laughs] This is the case of Anderson versus Williams. 475 00:14:04,811 --> 00:14:07,413 - Plaintiff Nia Anderson thinks that time's up 476 00:14:07,413 --> 00:14:09,582 for her friend Jasmine to fork over 477 00:14:09,582 --> 00:14:12,018 the $2,500 for an heirloom watch 478 00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:15,154 that she busted after Jasmine did the decent thing 479 00:14:15,154 --> 00:14:16,856 and let her wear it to an event. 480 00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:19,992 But defendant Jasmine Williams claims that the watch was 481 00:14:19,992 --> 00:14:22,562 already rusty and crusty and bad, 482 00:14:22,562 --> 00:14:24,964 and only a fool would pay 2 rack 483 00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:26,866 to replace a watch that was never 484 00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:29,535 worth that to begin with. 485 00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:31,938 - So, Ms. Anderson, tell me why you're here. 486 00:14:31,938 --> 00:14:36,709 - I'm suing Jasmine Williams for $2,500 487 00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:38,811 for a valuable watch. 488 00:14:38,811 --> 00:14:42,715 I gave it to Jasmine for her to borrow for an event. 489 00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:47,086 She returned it broken, unable to be fixed. 490 00:14:47,086 --> 00:14:48,654 - Jasmine, why are you here? 491 00:14:48,654 --> 00:14:51,057 - So it was for an award ceremony at my job. 492 00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:52,992 When we realized that it was broken, 493 00:14:52,992 --> 00:14:54,627 I offered to get it repaired. 494 00:14:54,627 --> 00:14:56,262 The person that I took it to said 495 00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:57,663 it was going to be like $150. 496 00:14:57,663 --> 00:14:59,232 And she said, "No." 497 00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,534 And I'm like, "So you want me to replace the whole watch?" 498 00:15:01,534 --> 00:15:03,236 And she was like, "Yeah." 499 00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:04,971 - Can you just describe the watch to me? 500 00:15:04,971 --> 00:15:08,674 - A family heirloom given to me by my great-grandmother. 501 00:15:08,674 --> 00:15:11,244 My grandmother was born in 1930. 502 00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:12,612 - That's not long ago. 503 00:15:12,612 --> 00:15:13,780 - It's almost 100 years, judge. 504 00:15:13,780 --> 00:15:15,548 - 100 years, exactly. 505 00:15:15,548 --> 00:15:16,549 Thank you. 506 00:15:16,549 --> 00:15:17,784 - I know somebody 100. 507 00:15:17,784 --> 00:15:19,218 - My auntie was 104. 508 00:15:19,218 --> 00:15:21,254 - And I got a cousin, 99. 509 00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:22,755 - I had a fever of 105. 510 00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:26,259 [laughter] 511 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:27,260 Did you bring your watch here? 512 00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:28,795 Can I see it? 513 00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:33,065 - It's right here in my hand shattered and unrepairable. 514 00:15:33,866 --> 00:15:36,102 - How did the watch break, because it looked 515 00:15:36,102 --> 00:15:39,539 like it was under stress. 516 00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:40,907 - I don't know how it got broken. 517 00:15:40,907 --> 00:15:42,275 - I do know how it got broken. 518 00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:43,709 Your wrist choked it out. 519 00:15:43,709 --> 00:15:47,079 [laughter] 520 00:15:47,079 --> 00:15:48,414 - Can I ask you a question, ma'am? 521 00:15:48,414 --> 00:15:51,684 Tell me how this is worth $2,500? 522 00:15:51,684 --> 00:15:54,587 This is gold, green, black, and silver. 523 00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:56,589 This thing is four different nationalities. 524 00:15:56,589 --> 00:15:58,057 [laughter] 525 00:15:58,057 --> 00:15:59,892 - It still holds a value-- 526 00:15:59,892 --> 00:16:01,227 - I know it holds a value to you. 527 00:16:01,227 --> 00:16:02,562 - --to me of $2,500. - What I'm asking-- 528 00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:04,297 Can you please calm down and listen to me? 529 00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:05,932 - Yes, ma'am. 530 00:16:05,932 --> 00:16:07,967 - All I'm asking you, when they made this watch 100 years ago, 531 00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:09,202 it was a nickel. 532 00:16:09,202 --> 00:16:10,703 [laughter] 533 00:16:10,703 --> 00:16:11,737 You got an appraisal? 534 00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:13,573 - Yes, ma'am, I did. 535 00:16:13,573 --> 00:16:15,074 - OK, Nia. 536 00:16:15,074 --> 00:16:17,076 How much you paid an appraiser to write this up for you? 537 00:16:17,076 --> 00:16:18,978 - Like $225? 538 00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:23,182 - For $200, I'll write anything on a piece of paper. 539 00:16:23,182 --> 00:16:25,017 - I'm going to pass the watch around. 540 00:16:25,017 --> 00:16:27,220 Be careful, because this is an antique. 541 00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:30,389 [tense music] 542 00:16:30,389 --> 00:16:31,657 - [bleep]. - Oh, Ray J! 543 00:16:33,593 --> 00:16:36,896 - Nia is suing her friend Jasmine for $2,500 544 00:16:36,896 --> 00:16:39,032 to replace the heirloom watch that Jasmine 545 00:16:39,032 --> 00:16:40,567 borrowed and broke. 546 00:16:40,567 --> 00:16:43,103 But Jasmine claims she offered to have it fixed, 547 00:16:43,103 --> 00:16:44,571 but Nia refused. 548 00:16:44,571 --> 00:16:47,640 Ms. Pat is about to settle it. 549 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:49,275 - I'm going to pass the watch around. 550 00:16:49,275 --> 00:16:52,278 Be careful, because this is an antique. 551 00:16:53,646 --> 00:16:54,647 [watch rattles] 552 00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:56,249 - Oh, Ray J! 553 00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:58,585 [laughter] 554 00:16:58,585 --> 00:17:02,555 - Wow. 555 00:17:02,555 --> 00:17:03,990 - I'm just playing, Your Honor. 556 00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:04,991 - Go to hell. 557 00:17:04,991 --> 00:17:07,127 [laughter] 558 00:17:07,127 --> 00:17:08,595 Jury, can you help me real quick? 559 00:17:08,595 --> 00:17:09,729 - You have the pieces. 560 00:17:09,729 --> 00:17:11,297 Why ruin the friendship with her 561 00:17:11,297 --> 00:17:13,433 by suing her for money when you can't really replace this? 562 00:17:13,433 --> 00:17:15,735 - She really is not taking responsibility 563 00:17:15,735 --> 00:17:17,036 for how much it means to me. 564 00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:18,271 - So you want to financially punish 565 00:17:18,271 --> 00:17:19,472 her for not being nice enough? 566 00:17:19,472 --> 00:17:20,440 - I'm not financially punishing her. 567 00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:21,541 - You are. 568 00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:22,509 If you valued it so much, why would 569 00:17:22,509 --> 00:17:23,676 you suggest that I wear it? 570 00:17:23,676 --> 00:17:25,545 - Because I value you, and I wanted 571 00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:27,080 to see you at your best. - Well-- 572 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:28,381 - So excuse me. 573 00:17:28,381 --> 00:17:30,417 - Did you ever try and get the watch fixed 574 00:17:30,417 --> 00:17:31,918 instead of just suing her? 575 00:17:31,918 --> 00:17:33,086 - Of course. 576 00:17:33,086 --> 00:17:35,955 However, the suggestions that they had 577 00:17:35,955 --> 00:17:37,991 would take away from the integrity 578 00:17:37,991 --> 00:17:41,294 of the watch in the vintage state that it was already in. 579 00:17:41,294 --> 00:17:43,263 - OK, before I make my decision, Nia, is there 580 00:17:43,263 --> 00:17:44,431 anything you want to say? - Yes. 581 00:17:44,431 --> 00:17:45,532 - Make it short. 582 00:17:45,532 --> 00:17:47,600 Everything been long to you. 583 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:49,836 - I believe that Jasmine should replace 584 00:17:49,836 --> 00:17:51,204 my grandmother's watch. 585 00:17:51,204 --> 00:17:52,872 I feel like $2,500 is-- 586 00:17:52,872 --> 00:17:53,873 - Is long. 587 00:17:53,873 --> 00:17:55,208 You're going long. 588 00:17:55,208 --> 00:17:57,310 [laughter] 589 00:17:57,310 --> 00:17:59,245 OK, Jasmine, what do you have to say? 590 00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:01,548 - I'm sorry that our friendship has come to this. 591 00:18:01,548 --> 00:18:04,784 But she knows she's exaggerating so much about it 592 00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:06,386 being such a family heirloom. 593 00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:08,321 And if she doesn't want to repair it, 594 00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:09,722 how am I to help her? 595 00:18:09,722 --> 00:18:11,257 - All right, I've heard enough. 596 00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:14,994 I just want to say, if this was a family heirloom 597 00:18:14,994 --> 00:18:16,362 like you said it was-- - Uh-huh. 598 00:18:16,362 --> 00:18:17,664 - You shouldn't have never loaned it out 599 00:18:17,664 --> 00:18:19,332 if it meant that much to you. 600 00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:20,333 I see the tears. 601 00:18:20,333 --> 00:18:21,601 I see the hurt. 602 00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:23,636 But you are your grandmother's most valuable 603 00:18:23,636 --> 00:18:25,305 heirloom, not a watch. 604 00:18:25,305 --> 00:18:27,807 And I got to say to you, Jasmine, stop borrowing 605 00:18:27,807 --> 00:18:29,342 people's old jewelry. 606 00:18:29,342 --> 00:18:30,643 [laughter] 607 00:18:30,643 --> 00:18:31,811 Come on now, sister. 608 00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:33,213 We're the same size. 609 00:18:33,213 --> 00:18:34,914 You know we can't be putting on no 100-year-old watch 610 00:18:34,914 --> 00:18:36,716 and not busting that [bleep] wide open. 611 00:18:36,716 --> 00:18:39,619 [laughter] 612 00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:42,121 OK, now I've got to settle this once and for all. 613 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:44,724 [dramatic music] 614 00:18:44,724 --> 00:18:46,860 I'm ruling in favor of-- 615 00:18:46,860 --> 00:18:49,662 ♪ ♪ 616 00:18:49,662 --> 00:18:51,030 --Nia-- - Ooh! 617 00:18:51,030 --> 00:18:52,398 - --the plaintiff. - Ooh! 618 00:18:52,398 --> 00:18:54,634 - Oh, thank you! 619 00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:57,704 - You're gonna get $150 to fix your watch. 620 00:18:57,704 --> 00:18:59,005 - [bleep] damn it. 621 00:18:59,005 --> 00:19:01,407 Serious? 622 00:19:01,407 --> 00:19:02,842 Serious? 623 00:19:02,842 --> 00:19:05,612 - If it means that much to you, get it fixed. 624 00:19:05,612 --> 00:19:07,614 Keep this watch a part of your family. 625 00:19:07,614 --> 00:19:08,748 That's all you need. 626 00:19:08,748 --> 00:19:10,216 [gavel bangs] 627 00:19:10,216 --> 00:19:11,618 - You are dismissed. 628 00:19:11,618 --> 00:19:14,621 - Don't lend out [bleep] you can't get back. 629 00:19:14,621 --> 00:19:16,089 Keep your grandmama's [bleep] in the house 630 00:19:16,089 --> 00:19:18,258 where she kept it at. 631 00:19:18,258 --> 00:19:19,559 I ain't got no heirlooms. 632 00:19:19,559 --> 00:19:20,960 - You got Fruit of the Loom? 633 00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:22,529 - Yes. 634 00:19:22,529 --> 00:19:24,330 - Well, don't lend those out either. 635 00:19:24,330 --> 00:19:25,598 [laughter] 636 00:19:27,268 --> 00:19:28,569 - You let a crackhead steal a monkey? 637 00:19:28,569 --> 00:19:29,570 - He dipped. 638 00:19:29,570 --> 00:19:31,672 - I sold a lot of crack. 639 00:19:31,672 --> 00:19:33,874 Crackheads are fast. 640 00:19:33,874 --> 00:19:36,343 We were going on a seven-day cruise to Jamaica. 641 00:19:36,343 --> 00:19:37,544 She flaked on me. 642 00:19:37,544 --> 00:19:39,380 - All your baby had was the [bleep]. 643 00:19:39,380 --> 00:19:41,448 You could have left that baby at home. 644 00:19:41,448 --> 00:19:43,717 - I got into a whole car accident, got to the hospital, 645 00:19:43,717 --> 00:19:45,552 and found out that I did not have health insurance. 646 00:19:45,552 --> 00:19:46,654 - I love her to death. 647 00:19:46,654 --> 00:19:47,721 She remind me of me. 648 00:19:47,721 --> 00:19:49,223 - Why are you in here suing her? 649 00:19:49,223 --> 00:19:50,691 - I'm standing on principle now. 650 00:19:50,691 --> 00:19:52,293 - Them tears went back real quick. 651 00:19:52,293 --> 00:19:53,594 - Real quick. 652 00:19:53,594 --> 00:19:54,628 They gone.