JELLY ROLL: Um...
let me tell y'all something I ain't told too many people.
Some days I wake up and wonder if I'm even
doing the right thing, man.
Some days I just wonder, dude,
am I really chasing the dream here,
or am I just running from the inevitable?
[dramatic music]
♪♪ ♪♪
So much history in this room for me.
There's not another place on Earth
that'll be more special than playing
your hometown arena, ever.
♪♪ ♪♪
Dude, I'm petrified to do this show tonight.
I've always struggled with self-worth, and value,
and feeling like you belong places, you know?
I've been to jail 40 times in my life.
I never made it out of the ninth grade.
I'm really a street kid that had absolutely nothing
going for him.
To me, life was about climbing mountains.
They said we were too fat to be in the music business.
They told me that my voice wasn't cool enough.
They told me I didn't have an image,
it would never fit in country music or any genre.
These are all to me as mountains
we had to just climb and conquer.
- Ladies and gentlemen,
from Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee,
let's get ready to rumble!
JELLY ROLL: I think what we're gonna deal with tonight is,
what do they call them, an immovable force
meets an unstoppable object?
This is a collision course. This is destiny.
[cheers and applause]
[crowd roaring]
- ♪♪ I'm a long-haired son ♪♪ ALL: ♪♪ Of a sinner ♪♪
- ♪♪ I'm searching for new ways I can get gone ♪♪
♪♪ I'm a pedal to the highway ♪♪
♪♪ If you ever wonder why we ♪♪ ALL: ♪♪ Write these songs ♪♪
[cheering]
- You know, I just started really singing
a few years ago.
So I'm still not comfortable singing.
I'm like a scared child when I have to sing.
And I just sing good because I just sing from the stomach.
Maybe that's the magic to it, though.
Maybe I'm a decent singer because I don't know
how to sing.
You know, and I'm the one dude that's just
singing songs of the broken.
This community has allowed me to speak on our behalf,
on behalf of the depressed, the stressed,
the anxious, the addicted.
I'm just documenting what I see and what I know.
I've been a drug addict. I've been a loser.
I've been a stealer.
I think that people connect with the music
because it's a reflection of themselves.
There's people lined up around the buses every night.
It's unreal, kind of.
Signs in the crowd, "Your music saved my life."
I'm haunted at times because you can close your eyes
and think of that father who cried on your shoulder
because his daughter overdosed at the Publix
next to the venue, you know?
You'll remember that dude forever.
- Thank you so very much, Jelly Roll,
for making this grieving mama smile.
- My boyfriend introduced me to Jelly Roll's music
because it helped him cope with his addiction.
It just kind of helped me help him understand
what he was going through.
JELLY ROLL: I've been in and out of jail
my whole life, man.
I've hurt so many people along the way,
and I still feel that guilt.
And that still comes from that place of worthlessness.
I struggle with imposter syndrome a lot.
I struggle with survivor's guilt just as much.
[soft music]
At what point, also, do you make peace with it,
and you quit apologizing, and you actually move on?
At what point do I not feel like I have
to carry the sins of my past anymore,
that I've finally been redeemed of them,
or I've done enough to justify that I don't have
to live back here much longer?
♪♪ ♪♪
It doesn't--I mean, you know, just who'd have
thought I could help people?
Fuck, I needed help, you know? I still need help, God.
[dramatic music]
When I say "Jelly," you say "Roll!"
Jelly! ALL: Roll!
- Jelly! ALL: Roll!
- I didn't know anything about him, literally nothing.
I said, who-- who the fuck is Jelly Roll?
He had even been described to me
as a guy who was a little bit hip-hop, a little bit rock,
and then he belts out this ballad of this tormented soul.
- I think "Save Me" said a lot of stuff
that people can't say, but they feel.
♪♪ Somebody save me ♪♪
In the middle of the pandemic, we put it on YouTube.
We never spent a dollar running an ad.
I just looked up, and it was at a million views.
And then 5 million, and then 20.
And then we broke 100.
Every record label in America started calling.
- He's really talking about true heartbreak
and true struggle.
And it's authentic.
And I was like, there's something about this guy.
I got to see where it goes.
JELLY ROLL: Our first show this year was,
like, at a thousand-person club.
We was excited about that.
I was like, you told me I sold a thousand tickets
in Connecticut?
In three months' time,
we're gonna do 16,000 plus at the Bridgestone Arena
in my hometown.
I mean, this thing's becoming a landslide.
Big tours, baby! Big fucking tours!
MIKE: Week by week, it just keeps getting bigger.
I've never seen someone climb this fast.
Just to see this very humble dude
by just watching this rise is killer.
- Give it up for Jelly Roll!
- This is fixing to be absolute insanity.
My DJ, DJ Chill, said, "Our tour motto, EDN."
I said, "What's that mean?"
Chill said, "Everything different now.
Everything different now."
He said, "We're not going back
"to that thousand-cap club no more.
Everything's different now."
Y'all changed my fucking life!
I fucking love you!
And I owe you the rest of my fucking life.
[soft guitar music]
♪♪ ♪♪
JELLY ROLL: We're doing anywhere from 17 to 26 shows
a month right now,
somehow trying to squeeze in time
to get songs together towards the album.
You know, we're only as big as our last hit.
So there's a little pressure there.
All this stuff's brand-new to me, by the way.
I'm acclimating in real time.
JOHN: In the middle of all this, we also are gonna drop
two singles, two videos
between now and the Bridgestone as well.
It's been a really, really impressive journey for him
and the people around him.
It's shocking really, the ascension.
♪♪ ♪♪
JELLY ROLL: It's your favorite time of the day.
JACK: Set list time! JELLY ROLL: Yeah!
All right, you've got to climb up the hill with us
to talk about it, though.
JACK: Oh!
- Oh, no. I'm not doing that this early.
- Sounds like somebody doesn't want a set list.
[laughs]
This set list is gonna cost you a puff of weed.
[laughs] What about that, buddy?
This is my favorite pre-show ritual.
Every city, go sit out in the crowd,
or where the crowd will be.
And take a look at where they're--
what they're gonna see.
It's fucking just crazy.
It is as beautiful sitting in it as it is looking up at it.
You know? JACK: This place is incredible.
- This is unreal.
This is 10,000 motherfuckers.
This is it.
It's like one of them places you dream of playing.
- You know what's crazy?
I don't even think 14-year-old Jason knew this was possible.
If I wasn't a musician, I'd be dead, for sure,
or in prison doing life.
I was in and out of juvenile my whole childhood almost.
And the way society looks
at a troubled youth is so wrong, right?
They're like, they need discipline, or they need--
man, they need love.
They need opportunity. They need chance.
They need to see that people have made it
from their circumstance.
Every time I drive by that juvenile,
I'm just reminded of people stuck in there
that do not know they have a chance
to be whoever the fuck they want to be in life.
You know, I had a reminder today of how important
our journey really is.
They knocked on my door this morning at 7:00.
I found out that a kid I've been calling my nephew
his whole life, since he was born,
was shot and killed outside of a bar in South Nashville
this morning.
Young kid, took care of his family,
took care of his kids.
Stray bullet.
I'm not sure if it's just the moment, you know,
or having a kid I love get killed this morning.
[soft music]
♪♪ ♪♪
I've seen so much me in him.
♪♪ ♪♪
PERSON: Microphone, check.
One, two, hey, hey.
Rob, hey, check.
Center forward microphone, check.
One, two, Rob.
[soft guitar music]
♪♪ ♪♪
JELLY ROLL: All the family's coming, you know?
It's--it's dope-- I think there's 20 of us.
- Bubba!
- Agh!
JELLY ROLL: The one thing I love about my family is,
man, they're cheering for me.
They know where I came from.
They know what I've been through.
It's like when you finally get to see one of your own win,
and your own have only done nothing but lose, you know?
That's my brother right there, y'all.
That's the middle one. - Yeah.
JELLY ROLL: That's my closest brother.
We can't tell the other brother that.
That's the rule.
You can't tell the other brother that.
ROGER: Me.
Me being the older brother,
I've always been the influence, been the shot-caller.
But now that Jason's making the money he's making,
I think that we're gonna pass the reins to him, see?
[laughter]
BUNNIE: Hi. JELLY ROLL: Whoo.
All right, all right, all right, Miss Denim.
BUNNIE: I told you, I'm bring-- - That outfit did work.
BUNNIE: I'm bringing denim back.
- You don't take my credit for my one fashion thing
I finally did.
- I'm bringing it back for the bitches.
- OK, I've had one good fashion moment our whole relationship.
So my daughter, Bailee Ann, is 14 years old.
To be able to share this with her at Red Rocks
tonight's big.
10,000 people, that'll make you nervous,
which I just get nervous before every show anyways.
Just that insecure kid in you still
that just thinks about everything
that could go wrong.
I've already been not sleeping good,
and altitude, and just stress.
My health is horrible.
You can't walk around and treat your body
the way I've treated mine and be OK.
That's the truth.
What all did you put in this puppy tonight?
PERSON: Ooh, calcium, magnesium, B12, B-complex,
a ton of vitamin C, a ton of glutathione, l-carnitine.
And we're fixing to put some Toradol.
- Let's fucking go! Oh, the songbird?
PERSON: Songbird. - All right.
PERSON: Songbird is going straight
to the bloodstream tonight.
- The songbird.
♪♪ ♪♪
- Hey, listen, y'all. Tonight, we go the fuck out.
PERSON: That's right!
- Leave it here, because y'all know what happens tomorrow.
We start the road to Bridgestone, baby.
PERSON: Circle up, circle up. Bow your heads, let us pray.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for everything
you did to get us here and everything you did
for Jelly to get him here.
Keep our families safe while we're on the road.
Lord, give us the opportunity, the strength, and the courage
to do this show tonight.
In Jesus' name we pray.
ALL: Amen, turn up! Yeet, yeet!
- Let's go make some music with our friends at Red Rocks!
[chanting]
[crowd cheering]
JELLY ROLL: What the fuck is up, Colorado!
This is the most tickets we've sold to a Jelly Roll show
in the United States of America,
right motherfucking now!
I thank you for paying for the ticket.
I thank you for waiting in line.
I thank you for coming on a fucking Sunday night.
I thank you for walking up that fucking hill.
This will go down as one of the most special shows
of my whole motherfucking life.
But more importantly, I hope you listen
to what I'm fixing to say.
This will be the most important thing
I say all fucking night.
Listen.
[soft guitar music]
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ Somebody ♪♪ ALL: ♪♪ Save me ♪♪
- ♪♪ Me from myself ♪♪
♪♪ I spent so long ♪♪
♪♪ Living in hell ♪♪
♪♪ Well, they say my lifestyle ♪♪
♪♪ Is bad for my health ♪♪
I came to a conclusion early that this wasn't a concert.
This is a healing experience.
It's an emotional exchange.
It's an exchange of energy.
♪♪ All of this drinking and smoking is hopeless ♪♪
♪♪ But feel like it's all that I need ♪♪
♪♪ Something inside of me's broken ♪♪
♪♪ I hold on to anything that sets me free ♪♪
♪♪ I'm a lost cause ♪♪
I really look at this as a form of church to a degree.
I know the power of them old back-road Baptist churches
and the impact they had on my life.
And it always felt like I was there to receive something.
I feel like that's why we're here.
♪♪ I'm a ♪♪ ALL: ♪♪ Lost cause ♪♪
♪♪ And, baby, don't waste your time on me ♪♪
♪♪ I'm so damaged beyond repair ♪♪
♪♪ Life has shattered my hopes and my dreams ♪♪
BUNNIE: My husband is so therapeutic and so healing
for so many people.
They purge.
You can feel the emotion and just how much
everybody needs that moment with him.
- This song--this song--
was because you posted it on Facebook and Instagram.
This song was because you posted it
on Snapchat and TikTok.
This fucking song is because you picked up the phone
and called a friend and said,
you got to hear this fucking song!
One thing first.
Can we light this motherfucker up if music has ever
changed your life tonight?
[cheering]
Y'all keep them motherfuckers as high as you can.
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ I'm a ♪♪ ALL: ♪♪ Lost cause ♪♪
- ♪♪ Baby, don't ♪♪ ALL: ♪♪ Waste your time on me ♪♪
♪♪ I'm so damaged beyond repair ♪♪
♪♪ Life has shattered my hopes and my dreams ♪♪
- Louder!
♪♪ ♪♪
I think the music's always a cry to help to whatever
that higher power is.
Even my friends in recovery, the first thing they learn
is that you've got to find something
that means more to you than you.
And that's the importance of having some sort of a belief
that there is something out there that can help us.
♪♪ ♪♪
I fucking love you, motherfuckers!
♪♪ ♪♪
They said almost-perfect comes around all the time,
but perfect never does.
And that is what Red Rocks was.
It was almost perfect.
Nate getting killed was such an eye-opening reality
that some things never change.
I thought we grew past that, man.
I just thought that all of my guys from the neighborhood
and all the guys from out there had just--
everybody had kind of grown up.
I thought we'd escaped.
We're in Antioch.
As soon as we took that right right there, we're in Antioch.
When Nashville started getting too big early, they grew out.
How New York City grew up, we grew out, kind of like LA.
[somber music]
♪♪ ♪♪
I think a lot of the people that listen to my music lived
in some version of Antioch.
This is Anytown, USA.
It's just middle-lower-class America, man.
You know?
A bunch of apartments, a bunch of trailer parks,
a bunch of, you know, single-family homes.
Antioch is full of memories of me being a troublesome kid,
you know?
♪♪ ♪♪
Caught my first crawdad over there.
Right here.
[light guitar music]
♪♪ ♪♪
I'm a third-generation Nashvillian.
My grandfather came here to start his meat business
that my father ended up taking over.
Wanted to get a house for the family.
That's when my dad started booking bets.
He was booking them a little bit,
but he started really getting into hustling hard.
At least, that's the story I was told at the kitchen table
when I was a kid.
This is the house.
I learned how to ride my bike in this front yard right here.
I haven't got to spend this much time in front of it
since I moved out of it.
Well, I was in one of those households
where everybody listened to something different, you know?
I was the baby. I never controlled the radio.
So if I went to sister's room, we're listening to Nirvana,
Metallica, or Pearl Jam.
If I go to big brother's room,
we're listening to Tupac or Three 6 Mafia.
You go with your mother, and she's listening
to Motown or oldies.
Your daddy's listening to outlaw country
and James Taylor.
And I was just influenced by all these different musics.
This was the only house that we ever lived at as a family.
And that's why this address always comes back to mind.
- Let me tell you a story about Jelly Roll
hanging Christmas lights.
He was on the roof hanging Christmas lights up there,
about 350 pounds.
Our mother comes out on the front porch
and says, "Jason, get off the roof!"
And the next thing you hear is, doo, doo, doo, doo, boom,
right into the bushes there.
And what does she say? "Get up!
You're scaring the neighbors!"
[laughter]
♪♪ ♪♪
Mama was "life of the party" type person.
Vibrant, very magnetic.
And then we don't know.
I mean, she just slowly started going downhill.
And all of a sudden, just one day, the normality
is that she's laying in the bed in her nightgown.
- I would just watch her go doctor to doctor to doctor.
And this doctor would give her this for pain.
This doctor would give her this as a muscle relaxer.
This doctor would give her this for her anxiety.
And I watched that slowly spin into a drug addiction.
It was like watching a woman lock herself up
in a corner of the house and just--
you had to go up there to see her.
She couldn't even come down the steps, man.
That top room up there to the right,
she never left that room, man.
She never left that room.
And if she did, she'd come down to the kitchen.
That was a big day, man.
That was a big deal when she came down to the kitchen,
lit up a cigarette, and turned on a record.
I mean, she was a great woman, good mother.
But she was clearly a woman who was struggling
with drugs and mental health.
- I don't really like to think about it
simply because, from start to finish,
she was a totally different person.
And she robbed herself of a lot of life.
- Yeah.
- And she robbed us of a lot of life.
- My mother, I love her to death.
She's 71 years old.
And they're still trying to get the right "combination"
of medicine for her.
Losing this house was probably the beginning
of a real spiral for me.
I think that, when mom and dad divorced,
it just kind of, you know, went back to the other side
of the train tracks.
[soft guitar music]
♪♪ ♪♪
JELLY ROLL: My mother was a drug addict.
My child's mother struggled with drug addiction.
It has been the plague of my entire neighborhood,
my entire lifestyle, my entire life.
We just try to go do all the things we can.
We try to go to probably 20, 30 rehabs a year.
This program does 45 days in and 45 days out.
So everybody in here is going
through the hard time right now.
Sobriety is always hard.
But this is the hardest part.
How are y'all?
- Hi. - Good, how are you?
- For those of y'all that don't know, my name is Jelly Roll.
I'm a musician. I'm not a public speaker.
So work with me. We'll start there.
I sing because I'm not great at fucking talking.
But I've struggled with my own issues
with addiction, and alcohol, and things.
I smoked meth out of a light bulb at 15 years old.
I had tripped acid by the time I was 15.
I'd done mushrooms by the time I was 15.
I took every pill you could think of
by the time I was 15, 16.
Done cocaine.
Nothing about anything I was doing at any moment
during my childhood felt like I was out of place.
You know what they say about us.
We always trade one addiction for another, right?
I started realizing that if I could channel that energy
into obsessing about the things that made me better,
like the same way that I would chase that street shit
every single day, and I woke up,
and that's all that fucking mattered until I fell asleep
is how I started treating music.
And that's not healthy neither, frankly.
But it worked for me because I made it healthy.
So I just want to encourage y'all to look at the gift
that you think has been a curse and how that applies
to something in your life.
There are people that listen to my music that have
figured it out more than me.
I just hope that people judge the music and not the man.
I no longer have a deadly addiction
to pain pills or codeine.
I no longer have a deadly addiction to cocaine.
There was times in my life where I feel like
I could have died from any one of those drugs.
But I still smoke a little weed to keep my head straight.
I will still get blackout drunk.
And every now and then, we'll do something wild.
CHASE: What's up, baby?
- How are you, brother? Good to see you, man.
CHASE: People in recovery can relate to him
because he has a similar story to a lot of people.
That just lets people know that,
no matter what you've been through,
you don't have to live every day of life
with drugs and alcohol and be miserable.
- I'm really proud of everyone here.
- Aw, that's awesome. - Yeah.
- I am too, and I don't know you motherfuckers.
[laughter]
I just want to tell y'all that I believe in you
and that I think you can do it.
And I know the statistics are against us all.
And life fucking sucks.
And that's why we wanted to come spread some joy.
[applause]
- Hey, how are you? - Good.
I'm Noelle. - What's up, Noelle?
NOELLE: When I heard "Save Me," like,
that's how I felt a lot of the time.
You kind of feel just, like, helpless
and like you can't save yourself.
I had never really heard anyone talk
about exactly how I was feeling in that way before,
especially someone famous that was,
I don't know, battling the same thing.
- Aw, baby, I'm so sorry.
That's what I say, he or she, right--we all know somebody.
- How are you doing now?
I was crying the whole time in there.
It means a lot.
When I was like 15, I just started
with the smoking and the drinking,
kind of, like, a peer thing.
But then once it got to the harder drugs,
I really realized, like, I'm gonna die
from this if I don't get help.
- You know what's crazy?
When you look in their faces, you just see people
that are trying to figure it out.
You're watching somebody in the middle
of the most pivotal life change
they're having in their entire life.
Nothing will be more important than this transition
from heavy addiction into sobriety.
[soft music]
♪♪ ♪♪
It's a little emotional, right?
You just have this little thing, where it's just--
the amount of times I had to stop from crying in there,
that'll just weigh on you just by default.
♪♪ ♪♪
The biggest demon in my life is my mental health,
which is a direct correlation with the obesity.
I've had this struggle since I was a kid.
Like, I just had so many issues.
And I have such an addictive nature
that as I would weave in and out of drug use,
I would always find that comfort in food.
Well, I was diagnosed with severe depression.
I really struggle, man.
I wish I understood it. To be honest, I don't.
I have a personal tool kit that I use that I've
got through therapists.
No matter what, just go to the kitchen,
and drink water at the kitchen table for a few minutes.
And if I can get through that, then it's like,
go take a walk, go stand outside.
And sometimes, I just curl the fuck up
and go back to sleep and cancel my day.
That's the truth.
That's the truth we never talk about.
♪♪ ♪♪
[soft music]
JELLY ROLL: When my father passed away,
I stepped outside to smoke a joint,
and it gave me the worst anxiety
I've ever had in my life.
And I quit smoking for almost two years until recently.
I started smoking again to cut back on drinking.
Growing up, drugs were just always a thing.
Nobody questioned it.
I never seen anybody ever act like it was weird to them
that, you know, people--everybody
popped pills, or smoked weed, or drank, or did cocaine,
you know?
Or did crack-- especially crack.
God, everybody smoked crack.
Here's the thing about being a teenager.
I thought selling drugs was a means to an end.
I think it was me thinking, OK, I don't want to be here.
To be somewhere better, it's going to cost money.
I need to find money to be somewhere better.
I don't know if I thought I deserved a better life.
But I was willing to do whatever it took to have one.
RANDY: I actually first met him
when he was about 10 or 11.
He wasn't in school, but he didn't want to be either.
I always said, you can't run from me.
I can actually catch you.
You're the only one I can catch.
[chuckles]
Because he was a little chubby guy,
and so was I.
[chuckles]
I think sometimes that was part
of his inner struggle too.
You know, kids can be cruel.
They made fun of him for that.
They made fun of him for his mom.
They made fun of him for what he wore,
how he lived, where he lived.
- I think I was just a kid that wanted to be accepted.
And I knew money brought acceptance.
And I knew people thought drugs were cool.
And it doesn't make any reason to get into it, right.
But I think it all just came from a real insecure spot.
RANDY: We got word Jelly was selling weed.
To be a little weed dealer,
you didn't really get a lot of attention.
But you were on the radar.
JELLY ROLL: I was in and out of jail for, like,
weed, or cigarettes, or the kind of stuff
you arrest high-schoolers and middle-schoolers for.
14 to 17, that two, three-year window was that whole stretch.
And then people realized you can make a lot
of money selling cocaine.
And then everybody starts selling cocaine.
When I got arrested, all I felt was anger.
I was just so mad at everybody
but who I should have been mad at.
♪♪ ♪♪
I'd already gave up hope on anything.
I just didn't have any self-worth.
I didn't understand the importance of life.
I didn't understand the importance of time.
When I was 16, I ended up going to juvenile
and being charged as an adult.
♪♪ ♪♪
I caught a strong-armed robbery case.
To the juvenile judge, I looked like a kid
that had just done nothing but get in trouble.
And she was totally right.
We were pleading to try to give me a program
to help me, you know, like a real program, not jail.
♪♪ ♪♪
We were waiting to hear back from the judge,
and they called me one day and told me, pack my stuff.
[police sirens wailing]
When I got down there, I said, "Where they got me going?"
And I'll never forget that lady's face
when she looked at me with sadness and said,
"You're going across the street.
"You've been charged as an adult.
Is there anybody you'd like to call?"
♪♪ ♪♪
I picked up the phone, and I called my dad.
I said, "Dad, they charged me as an adult.
I'm on my way to the Criminal Justice Center."
He said, "Well, the only good news is,
you should have a bond, and I'll be there."
And he came and got me.
And I fought the case from the streets
for about nine months.
And they ended up making me go do
18 months day for day in jail.
♪♪ ♪♪
[sniffs]
Then I came home on probation.
And I fucked that up.
We were selling crack right before I went
to jail for it, the last time I went to jail ever.
I think at that point, I was just so engulfed
in the street life, and I was just so angry.
And I'm not asking for sympathy for this.
I'm not asking for anybody to understand.
And I know more today than I've ever known
how absolutely fucking horrible what I did was.
Anything that hurt people, I wish I could change that.
♪♪ ♪♪
But I was just a kid, man.
And I was just running fucking wild.
♪♪ ♪♪
My wife always says that the songwriting process
is where I let my demons out.
That's where I exorcise the darkness inside of me.
♪♪ ♪♪
My preference is to treat it like a hang that...
PERSON: Yeah. JELLY ROLL: You can write at.
PERSON: That's fun. - You know what I mean?
Like, we're really just gonna sit here and drink
and smoke pot, but--
[laughter]
But if somebody wants to hook a melody,
or got a beat, or something, you know what I mean,
then let's fuck with it.
I haven't put an album out in 18 months.
So that brings a lot of pressure on an artist, man.
I am in need of writing songs, and more than just
for the pressure of continuing to follow this.
I've got to get some of this shit out of me.
This is therapy.
So we're dropping the album in April or May.
And we're going to drop the next radio single December 9th.
- On country radio? - Country radio.
That's why we're here. - Oh.
- I need y'all's help. Like, it was funny.
I came into this genre expecting to be judged
and people be prejudiced against me.
And it was me, in turn, I was the prejudiced one.
I was the one looking at country music like, no way.
I've been writing most of this album by myself
or with a very select one or two people in the room.
Hey, sexy. BUNNIE: Hey.
JELLY ROLL: Oh, my God.
BUNNIE: Tequila. JELLY ROLL: The tequila fairy.
BUNNIE: Here you go.
WHITWORTH: Yes, thank you so much.
JELLY ROLL: Normally I only write with guys I know,
like Whitworth, the guy with the hair.
I can look at Whitworth and go, I don't like that.
And he won't get offended, and vice versa.
It takes a lot of honesty in the room.
- All right, well, let's try Jelly's tequila maybe, I guess.
- Let's try it, cheers. - Cheers.
HILLARY: That's a big shot for me.
PERSON: Let's go.
JELLY ROLL: This lady, Hillary, is just--
she's a Hall of Fame songwriter.
So when the opportunity came up to write with her,
I was like, yeah, I normally don't write with people.
But I'd love to write with her.
- [humming]
WHITWORTH: I feel like even in country, it's not gonna be
a love song for you, right?
It's gonna need to be like a dark--
JELLY ROLL: Well, I think we-- I think we write love songs.
I just think we got to be more abstract
about what they're written about.
WHITWORTH: Right. - What are we in love with?
WHITWORTH: Tequila. - Right.
- Can you play a little bit now for inspiration?
- You think I can play this? - Oh.
[laughter]
WHITWORTH: He said he's a guitar stand,
not a guitar player.
- Did you hear me playing earlier?
- I did. - That was me at max.
[laughter]
As good as it gets.
I'm still kind of shy in certain things, you know?
I'm very insecure.
But I think that's what makes me who I am too kind of.
[percussive guitar music]
ALYSA: So it feels dark. JELLY ROLL: That's dope.
- Yeah, that's cool.
♪♪ ♪♪
WHITWORTH: That feels cool. ALYSA: Yeah.
[Hillary vocalizing]
JELLY ROLL: Yeah.
[both vocalizing]
ALYSA: Sick.
WHITWORTH: That feels great.
JELLY ROLL: What if we write a song about keeping a--
keeping a problem away from your spouse?
ALYSA: Oh, keeping a what? - Yeah.
HILLARY: It does sound kind of sneaky.
- Like, the secret I'm keeping from you
isn't what you think it is.
HILLARY: Oh, it ain't a girl. - Yeah, it's not a girl.
HILLARY: Oh, shit.
- It's the girl versus-- you know what I mean?
But you write it in that super abstract way of,
like, I know I'm wrong, you know what I mean?
- Hm, that's cool.
♪♪ ♪♪
- ♪♪ She's got a-- ♪♪
Like, this is bullshit. - Super bluesy.
- Is that too bluesy?
- I like the bluesy-ness of it though.
- ♪♪ Nah, nah ♪♪
♪♪ Baby, I'm holding you ♪♪
♪♪ But she's got a hold on me ♪♪
I don't know. ALYSA: Yes.
- Too bluesy. ALYSA: No, it's sick.
- ♪♪ Baby, I'm-- ♪♪ It's too low for me.
Where is that for you?
♪♪ Baby, I'm-- ♪♪
WHITWORTH: He's got a surprisingly high voice.
- Yeah, I can go wherever you want me to go with it.
HILLARY: ♪♪ She's got a hold on me ♪♪
♪♪ Got a hold on me ♪♪
- ♪♪ Got a hold-- ♪♪
ALYSA: Fuck yeah. No, it's fucking great.
- Yeah, I see it. ALYSA: I love that.
- Yeah, that ain't high at all.
I mean, frankly, blues is gonna favor my voice
just in general, anything gritty.
[guitar strumming]
HILLARY: Is that right? Yeah.
- [humming]
- That's cool.
[vocalizing]
- ♪♪ Got a hold on me ♪♪
- That's cool. [Jelly Roll vocalizing]
[upbeat guitar music]
HILLARY: Is my push wrong?
ALYSA: No, it's good.
[laughter]
♪♪ ♪♪
BOTH: ♪♪ You got curves just like this bottle in my hands ♪♪
♪♪ But I can't stop but turning it back, baby ♪♪
♪♪ It loves my lips like crazy ♪♪
♪♪ You got eyes that burn like tequila ♪♪
♪♪ Ain't no man that wouldn't kill to be with you ♪♪
♪♪ Right now all wrapped up ♪♪
♪♪ So why am I so fucked up ♪♪
♪♪ Making strings of bad decisions ♪♪
♪♪ Leaving heaven for this living hell ♪♪
♪♪ Oh, yeah ♪♪
♪♪ I know you're all I need ♪♪
♪♪ But I just can't break free ♪♪
♪♪ From this little devil on my shoulder ♪♪
♪♪ Swearing she's got wings ♪♪
♪♪ You might be holding me ♪♪
♪♪ But she's got a hold on me ♪♪
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ She's got the hold on me ♪♪
♪♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪♪
WHITWORTH: Yeah, bro.
JELLY ROLL: Music started early with me as an option
because even in middle school,
I'd go to the lunch table and rap.
And I would gather crowds.
And then I would rap in jail or juvenile,
and I would gather crowds.
So it was just this thing where I was like, man,
every time I do this, people stop what they're doing
and watch me do it.
I always felt like music could have been it.
I just wasn't sure how possible it really fucking was.
[percussive music]
I didn't dream of CMA red carpets when I was five.
I dreamed of them when I was 33 and I started
having a big record growing.
I was like, this might actually fucking work.
♪♪ ♪♪
BUNNIE: I'm a West Coast girl.
So living out here in Nashville has been a culture shock.
I'm like, do I have to start wearing fucking rhinestones,
and cowboy boots, and fucking bellbottoms, and shit?
Like, I don't even know.
JELLY ROLL: I love the way that they just doubled down
on the flowers right at the hoo-ha.
- Yeah. - Yes.
- And the nipples. - Doubling down on it.
JELLY ROLL: Yeah, right?
- Literally, there's nothing in between here, but--yeah.
No, it's crazy.
JELLY ROLL: When it mattered, he lit it up.
BUNNIE: So I hold it like--
JELLY ROLL: You just always want to make sure that the--
- Yeah, like that. JELLY ROLL: Diamonds are front.
- Like a football? JELLY ROLL: Yeah.
[laughter] - No, do not do that.
All right.
JELLY ROLL: You know what I love about this style, Crystal?
CRYSTAL: What?
JELLY ROLL: Is that you styled it in a way that I would have
looked great without the jacket.
And the jacket's just the fire.
I think the evolution of my music from rap to country
has just been the evolution of my human.
It was all an evolution of how the music came,
you know, the songs I was singing, the way I wrote them,
my approach to everything.
♪♪ ♪♪
[chuckles]
Somebody stop and catch maniac, hoo-hoo.
Some kid who had an orange jumpsuit most of his life,
look at him.
Boy, my mom would make fun of me.
[laughing]
Listen, this is a big transition for me, y'all.
If there was a high school vote
of least likely to do anything cool,
I would have for sure won unanimously.
[crowd cheering]
I couldn't find my way in anything.
I always just ended up with the outcasts,
and the gang bangers, and the drug dealers,
and the drug users.
Everywhere I went, I just felt so less than average.
I'm fucking shaking nervous.
BUNNIE: Here we are.
We're like the Addams family of the country era.
We don't belong here, but we're here.
- Right over here.
- This is fun.
[laughs]
- And can we get that down front, please?
- How about right here? - Hold it, hold it.
[all shouting]
- I don't think I was prepared--
I don't think anybody is prepared--
for what comes with the success of entertainment.
- Tell me about your name. What is the inspiration?
- Well, I was a pudgy kid. You might not believe it.
And my mother called me "Jelly Roll."
I used to like donuts. Now I'm obese.
- Oh, no-- - No, I'm joking.
No, that is true. She did give me the nickname.
- It looks like you're trying to get some forgiveness
on your face with that cross tattoo.
- Oh, yes, sir. I am a changed man.
You know I've changed whenever
I'm on the red carpet talking to you.
How about that?
The boys back home, I love y'all.
Look, I did it, baby!
- Ladies and gentlemen,
my new favorite country music star, Jelly Roll!
- Whoo!
- Is there any type of music that he can't sing?
It seems like any time-- any song you put him into,
he kind of, like, blends right in.
- All I know is I married a rapper,
and now we're at the Country Music Awards.
So that speaks volumes.
- Right, right.
- That's her new thing.
She's telling everybody, "I married a rapper,
"and now I'm on the red carpet
at the biggest night in country music."
I'm just glad to be here.
This is one of them real surreal experiences.
As soon as we pulled up, I was like, oh, this is real.
BUNNIE: I don't know if it's that we don't belong there.
I think we don't fit in, for sure.
- Looking great. Making sure the hair is good.
Is it--
- Making sure I look as trashy as I feel.
[laughter]
BUNNIE: Country needs people to shake some shit up.
We need some rock and roll country.
Cookie cutter? That's not us.
We're like--we're over here just smashing the cookies,
ripping them apart, biting the heads off like Alice Cooper,
spitting them out.
[chuckles]
- Appreciate y'all. I'm glad to be here.
First red carpet, baby! - Yay, he's killing it!
You ready? Turn around and smile.
- [chuckles] I'm just kidding.
JELLY ROLL: It's unreal. It's an unreal experience.
I did not anticipate any of what happened.
I first came in, like, does somebody got a drink?
I'm trying to cool down. I'm just nervous.
But I settled into it.
Seeing a couple of friends,
that always makes you feel better.
- No way. We love you, Reba.
- Reba, we love you. - I love you so much.
You have no clue. My name is Jelly Roll.
And I just love you, Reba.
- "Fancy" was my life-- - "Fancy" was our theme song.
We lived it, Reba! We lived it!
Incredible day on the carpet.
I couldn't ask for anything better.
- I'm so proud of you.
- A dream come true, to be honest.
[chuckles]
[soft music]
This wasn't a normal day for kids like us.
I used to fear that one day I'd be washed up
and be the guy who had that one song
or those two or three songs.
But I don't worry about that no more.
I'm literally at a point in my life
now where I am making music for people,
for love, and for legacy.
This has nothing to do with money.
- What's up, Jelly Roll? JELLY ROLL: What's up, y'all?
How are y'all? - Good, how are you?
JELLY ROLL: Good to see y'all, brother, bless y'all.
- Jelly Roll!
JELLY ROLL: I'm a hugger. - Thank you, honey.
I know. I love you guys.
- Oh, thank you. - I'm straight on independent.
- How are you? - Do you know, I'm her mother.
- All right, I'd have never guessed.
- I watched your movie. I'm 14 1/2 years, thank you.
- No, thank you. - You saved me.
- Truly, thank you, baby. - Oh, my God.
Can I get a picture? - Yeah, of course.
- Oh, my God, I'm shaking.
JELLY ROLL: If it was the money, baby, I'd have
already showed my character.
And you'd have seen dollar bills flying out
the back of a drop-top, daddy.
♪♪ ♪♪
[crowd chanting]
Jelly Roll, Jelly Roll, Jelly Roll!
- One, two, three!
[Jelly Roll's "Hate Goes On"]
♪♪ ♪♪
- ♪♪ We the type to pull up to your party like ♪♪
♪♪ What's up with y'all? ♪♪
♪♪ Everybody in this bitch know that we don't fuck ♪♪
♪♪ With y'all ♪♪
Travel is nonstop. We're constantly on the road.
We haven't been home in months.
We're jumping from one city straight to the next,
over and over again.
♪♪ No need to back down, the king is back now ♪♪
♪♪ The king of white trash is 'bout to act out ♪♪
This morning we woke up and flew to Mississippi.
Sold out Mississippi show, baby!
- I can't stop drinking, every day.
- We got snow, booze, friendship,
and a sold-out show, baby, let's go.
- Actually, you want to hear a story?
I woke up at 9:00 with a bunch of--
- No. [laughter]
- Oh, good morning.
- My name's Eskimo Kountry.
And you are live.
- You guys are assholes.
JELLY ROLL: I love all of my guys.
And I can say I'm really blessed, man.
I've got a really, really good team, for real.
- [vocalizing]
[laughter]
[soft music]
- Bus life, it is unglorifying.
Scary, you still ain't rolled it.
What do you got?
I think one of the things I pride myself on the most
is having guys around me that have
been around me a long time, and also second-chance guys.
SCARY: I was his merch guy since he's been touring.
We've literally talked all this into existence getting high
on my couch in my living room.
He was like, "Man, Scary, one day you ain't
"even gonna have to do merch.
We're gonna be selling out arenas."
JELLY ROLL: You know, a lot of these guys that work with me
are guys that came from where I came from
or I've known a long time.
And I'm giving them an opportunity
and a chance not to have to risk their freedom anymore.
BOSTON: Originally, he was like, "Look, bro,
"I don't have a lot of money for you right now.
But I promise you one thing."
And I said, "What's that?"
He said, "I promise to show you things
you've never seen all the time."
And he keeps that promise to this day.
SCARY: We definitely came from a shit place,
and you know, some of us have been lucky.
And some of us haven't been so lucky.
- I could rattle names and bore you
with the caskets we've had to carry of people
who were either shot and killed or overdosed
on some sort of a drug.
I was in a tailspin for a long, long time, man.
And it cost me a lot--a lot.
On more than one occasion, my daughter
was a divine intervention in my life.
♪♪ ♪♪
I met Bailee's mother when I first came home from jail.
We met at a mutual friend's house, I think.
I was focused on selling drugs.
And then she got pregnant.
♪♪ ♪♪
And I violated probation, and I went back to jail again.
♪♪ ♪♪
I was in Harding Place at a facility called CCA
right here in Nashville, Tennessee.
I was in the H unit.
I was in cell 223.
And the guard came and knocked on my door May 22, 2008,
and told me I had a daughter.
He goes, "You had a little girl today.
Your daughter was born this morning."
I go to the door as he walks away.
I bang on the door and go, "Hey, hey, you know her name?"
He leans back to the window and goes,
"Fuck, I don't know, man.
He's like, "I'm just telling you what they told me
to tell you, buddy."
♪♪ ♪♪
I think I lived an extremely selfish life to that moment.
And I think it was the first time in my whole life
I thought about putting somebody in front of me.
[baby crying]
In that moment, I made a promise with her
that I had to be there for her.
And it's almost like something just clicked right then.
[electronic music]
I came out of jail with a plan A and a plan B.
Plan A was, I was gonna come home,
and I was gonna put every piece of energy I had into music.
My plan B was getting my GED while I was in jail
and come home and enroll in a community college
and try to live the square life.
And plan C was, I was gonna go
back to what I'd always done.
I came home and bet the farm on plan A.
♪♪ Came to my city, I'm a writer ♪♪
♪♪ Antioch's prizefighter ♪♪
♪♪ And I'm higher than a note hit by Mariah ♪♪
♪♪ I'm on fire ♪♪
Man, I rapped because I didn't think I could sing for shit.
My whole family couldn't sing.
So I just assumed I was in the bad singing club.
We were like alley cats, you know?
[howling]
Before I rapped, I sold crack.
I really got money in 50 ways.
No lie, I went to jail a few times
and did like 950 days.
Still getting money. Swear to God, I got about 50K.
All right, shit, did it!
Told 'em!
I passed out mixtapes.
Then I started doing shows.
And I found out about touring and how
people needed people to open.
You can get 100 bucks a night.
And bought an old van.
♪♪ Yo, man, I got him ♪♪
♪♪ Now I think we got a problem ♪♪
I never had a house. I slept in my van.
I was like the old, weird van-rapper guy.
- You're gonna be doing a lot of doobie rolling
when you're living in a van down by the river!
♪♪ ♪♪
- I've never done anything in my life half-assed.
Music was my Hail Mary.
It's a lifestyle or bust with me.
♪♪ Everybody, everybody screaming ♪♪
♪♪ We don't give a fuck ♪♪
♪♪ Screaming ♪♪ ALL: ♪♪ We don't give a fuck ♪♪
[country music]
- We were figuring it out, man.
We were living in the van.
We were living off the land.
We were crashing on couches.
There was a lot of living off the ladies,
that's for sure.
There was definitely-- [laughs]
- Daddy. - Ey.
BUNNIE: When I met him, I was just like, who is this dude?
And he was nobody.
They were playing a room of 30 people.
It's always been, oh, she's a gold digger.
And I'm just like, bro, that's not the case.
He would, like, FaceTime me and ask me for things
that he would need for Bailee.
I was just like, why is this guy calling me,
asking me this about his kid?
You know, this is crazy. But I didn't mind it.
That's the kind of pull that J had on me.
JELLY ROLL: Bunnie's always been
in the sex worker industry.
That was the culture in Vegas.
And I just related to that so much
because I understood how much an environment can affect you
and how you see things, you know?
Bunnie was who she was.
I was who I was.
It was two people looking to run wild together.
And I think that's what attracted me to Bunnie,
you know?
BUNNIE: Every time he would see me,
I would always be the one giving him drugs.
So he would be like, hey, you got a Xanax bar?
And I would give it to him.
Or he'd be like, hey, you got a bump of coke?
And I'd stick my nail up his nose, you know?
- Howdy.
- [laughs]
Guys, I'm off the market.
JELLY ROLL: Oh, we got married quick.
We stumbled into a courthouse at 11:59 blackout drunk
and got married.
[cheering]
- I'll probably still get blackout drunk once a year
the rest of my life just because you
never know what can happen.
Y'all didn't see that coming, did you?
[laughs] - Yeah, baby!
We were extremely toxic.
I was partying like crazy.
And he was partying as well.
And it's not--it's not a party if it happens every night.
It's an addiction.
- I'm not sure that I wouldn't have overdosed eventually.
I'm not sure that I wasn't playing those dangerous games
enough every night.
I think I thought I was chasing the bigger dream.
But I came close to breaking that promise I made to Bailee
and myself a lot.
[soft music]
♪♪ ♪♪
- Do you need anything else? JELLY ROLL: No, I'm good.
[coughing]
Ooh.
Dude, I pulled a muscle right here, dude.
And it has been the most painful thing
I've been through in the last five years.
It is so bad, dude.
I wish I could describe to you--
dude, I sneezed and cried.
[laughter]
- Getting too old for this shit, man.
BUNNIE: You know, he's a man.
He doesn't take care of himself.
He's been sick for two weeks.
Literally, we're on the phone.
I said, "Baby, you don't sound good."
He's like, "I'm fine."
JELLY ROLL: You definitely sacrifice a lot
of personal time for the greater good of the music,
you know, and the message.
- Hi, baby. - I love you.
- I'm sweating.
- Are you?
Baby, you're really going through something.
- I'm puking still. It's like phlegm.
- You look really thin and pale.
Can you go to a doctor? - Yeah, I'm gonna go today.
I just got to handle some shit. - OK, I'm gonna go with you.
- OK.
We're rounding third right now.
All roads are pointing to the Bridgestone.
We got a lot of rehearsal to do--new production,
new everything.
So it's starting to become the stressful time.
- How do you feel? - I feel OK.
I got a steroid shot. - Yeah, I can see it in you.
- No, I'm burning up.
I feel fucking incredible.
But I am, like, sweating out of my fucking knees.
- Poor baby.
JELLY ROLL: At the end of the day,
I've always related what I do to boxing.
And it's like, you have a team of people
that are helping you get ready.
But you got to get in that ring and fight.
[crowd cheering]
- I told y'all that tonight would
be a night of celebration.
You're just always more concerned with the people
that bought a ticket.
At the end of the day, I got to deliver.
Period.
I've never been more excited to share
and dedicate this song to everybody who lives
between right and wrong.
It's their big night.
It ain't my big night. This is their big night.
Minnesota, my name's Jelly Roll,
and this is "Son of a Sinner"!
[crowd roaring]
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ I never get lonely ♪♪
♪♪ I got these ghosts to keep me company ♪♪
♪♪ I took the rearview off of this old Ford ♪♪
♪♪ I only see in front of me ♪♪
♪♪ Now the past is out of sight and out of mind ♪♪
♪♪ I swore I changed ♪♪
♪♪ Now I'm back chasing these white lines ♪♪
♪♪ I'm just a long-haired son of a sinner ♪♪
♪♪ I'm searching for new ways I can get gone ♪♪
♪♪ I'm a pedal to the highway ♪♪
♪♪ If you ever wonder why we write these songs ♪♪
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ I'm only one ♪♪
ALL: ♪♪ Drink away from the devil ♪♪
JELLY ROLL: Being on tour and seeing people every night
and realizing how much this music has
an effect like church and how much of an outlet concerts are
changed the way I approach that.
ALL: ♪♪ Right and wrong ♪♪
JELLY ROLL: My new album is just growth
and gratitude in real time.
[soft music]
♪♪ ♪♪
We've been scared and gone to heaven for 30 albums.
This album that's fixing to come out,
you know, it's--
it's time to get a little hopeful, man.
♪♪ ♪♪
I was inspired to put a choir in "Need a Favor"
because I felt like it needed that back-road Baptist feel,
where the entire sermon scares you to heaven.
And then the organ hits, and they go, but there's hope.
That's what this new music is for me,
is it's the organ hitting and there being hope.
- I'm like, this is some-- some ish I would do.
- [chuckles]
- Because you know I like rock.
And that's like rock.
- It is like a rock, country type of vibe.
- I said, oh, this is gonna go.
- That's real musicianship, baby.
- Yeah.
ALL: ♪♪ I need a favor ♪♪ - Yeah.
[chuckles] - Yeah.
- What's up, what's up, what's up?
How are y'all? - Hi.
- This is so fucking awesome to have y'all.
Y'all know when I dreamed this up, I was like, no way.
I was like, there's no way they'll say yes.
Like, we got to get the Fisk Jubilee Singers on this song.
So nice to meet y'all, man.
I was born and raised here in Nashville.
So I've always been familiar with Fisk University
and what Fisk meant to the community,
and especially the Black community and the history
of the Fisk Jubilee Singers.
So that was a dream come true.
SHANNON: Fisk is a university here in Nashville.
They're part of this HBCU, a Black college here in town.
The Fisk Jubilee Singers have just celebrated
150 years of existence.
They're an institution in Nashville.
And so I was honored to be able to facilitate
the joining of Jelly and the Fisk Jubilee Singers.
JELLY ROLL: Have they asked you yet how we've known
each other my whole life almost?
- He was winning rap battle competitions, right,
when he was in high school.
I don't even know-- bro, you weren't even old--
- True story. - Enough to be in the club.
He was winning every week, like, for months.
One, two, three, and--
ALL: ♪♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪♪
- And-- ALL: ♪♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪♪
♪♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪♪
SHANNON: Everybody, just find your part.
Just do the Jubilee thing on the "ooh."
♪♪ Ooh ♪♪
You feel me?
One, two, ready, and--
ALL: ♪♪ Ooh ♪♪
♪♪ Ooh ♪♪
SHANNON: Now "ah."
ALL: ♪♪ Ahh ♪♪
- So once we get oohs, ahhs, then he'll have everything.
He can chop however he wants to chop.
We're just giving him the pieces.
He can treat them like samples.
Yeah, let's do it, y'all. - Whoo!
It's time to sing, baby.
I can't think of a choir in America that would
have meant more on this song.
The person there that knows the least about music
knows way more than me.
Blown away that we made this happen.
This is a really big deal.
Sanders, as humble as he is--
a couple of Grammys, a couple of Oscars,
you know-- he's an old South Nashville
motherfucker still at heart.
I just kept imagining, like, that old Southern back-road
Baptist church just singing, and clapping,
and screaming, and hollering like the churches
I went to as a child.
That shit is awesome.
God, it's so good.
God, it's fucking incredible. How y'all feel?
ALL: Good.
SHANNON: One, two, ready, and--
ALL: ♪♪ Ooh ♪♪
♪♪ Ooh ♪♪
JELLY ROLL: I have never felt hopeful
when I was writing an album.
I feel like I owe it to my people to try to give
them hope and try to help.
ALL: ♪♪ Ahh ♪♪
- Can they come back? - Is that them?
Yeah. - Yeah, yeah.
- Can we come in? - Yeah, course.
- Oh, my God.
- Hey, how are you, sweet lady?
So good to see you.
- [sobbing]
- Aw, baby, stop.
I said I wasn't gonna cry tonight.
You're finna make it happen. I'll cry with you.
- My brother's wife was battling mental illness.
And we were trying to get her help.
This is their daughter. - Oh, OK.
- And I saw your song on YouTube one day.
And it stopped me in my tracks.
I was like, that is my brother singing to me, "save me."
And his wife started harassing us.
And in March-- March 21, 2021,
she shot and killed him in front of her
and their daughter.
And I know you hear this all the time, but thank you.
It's like he's singing to us.
- I don't know how to explain it,
but you are there.
You come from that person. And you came from our son.
- Yes, ma'am. - Exactly.
- You spoke for him. - Exactly.
- God, I'm so glad I got to meet y'all, man.
This is awesome. God, thank you so much.
- I love you so much. - Y'all are so sweet.
[sobbing]
- You're a strong young lady, ma'am.
- Yes, she really is.
- There's an old phrase that says that we overcome
by the power of our testimony.
You have a real strong testimony.
And you're gonna do a lot of good
for the world with it one day.
You hear me?
And never let nobody tell you how to grieve.
You take your time.
You talk about him every day if it's
what it takes for you to get through it
because one day you'll talk about him with a smile.
I promise. I promise.
Thank y'all, ladies. - Thank you, honey.
Thank you so much. - Thank you.
[soft music]
♪♪ ♪♪
JELLY ROLL: I did drop a record today,
a song called "She."
"She" is extremely personal.
I know a lot of she's.
So this song is just something I felt was needed.
[Jelly Roll's "She"]
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ I see the sunrise in her eyes ♪♪
Oh, this is my thing.
Well, everybody, today is a special day.
For the first time in 14 months,
I have released new music.
Yes! New music, y'all.
♪♪ Her smile ♪♪
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ You'd never know that she's in pain ♪♪
The first time my aunt heard it,
she texted me and said,
this is your mother.
♪♪ It started with a little pill ♪♪
♪♪ ♪♪
You know, I've been writing songs for Mom since I was 12.
That's what got me writing songs, you know?
The only time I'd ever see my mama downstairs
was with music.
She'd throw a record on, and she'd dance
around the kitchen, and music would play.
Or she'd listen to a song and cry at the kitchen table,
and music would play.
It just felt like it was something
therapeutic happening there.
Me and my wife talked about it a lot.
And we thought the holidays was the best time to drop it.
I know that normally whenever I dealt with that stuff,
the hardest was around the holidays.
So my real hope is that somebody sees it,
and it awakens something in them right here
in this holiday spirit.
While them heartstrings are already being tugged on
and they're missing their family,
I hope maybe this will get somebody sober.
I'm just going through my Instagram,
where people tag you in their stories.
"Jelly Roll did something special with this one."
A lot of people just posting "She."
I'll be doing this for the rest of the night, by the way.
Somebody said, "Didn't even make it in 30 seconds,
and I'm already in tears."
Oh, let me see if this is the one.
Here it is. OK, here it is.
So they're playing the song, right?
And it goes, "My sister, this song is for you.
I hope you come home soon."
I'm not doing that today.
[sighs]
We're good?
- Just--I'm sorry.
Can we just get behind you--
- Not right now.
Nah, that's it for today, B.
[soft music]
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ I see the sunrise in her eyes ♪♪
♪♪ Before the cold November rain ♪♪
Some days I feel like I'm still
running in circles because I think no matter what I do,
it's not enough.
♪♪ You'd never know that she's in pain ♪♪
You're supposed to go home and give back.
That's the rule. You know, that's what you do.
That's the golden rule.
Juvenile's where it started for me.
♪♪ She was the life of the party ♪♪
♪♪ She was the one everybody used to wanna hang around ♪♪
♪♪ I bet they wonder where she is now ♪♪
21 years ago, I spent two Thanksgivings in a row here.
I know what's happening in there.
I know that feeling. Saddest day of the year, man.
I don't think any one person has
the ability to fix the world.
But I think that if a bunch of people do a little bit,
it gets a little bit better.
- Man, I appreciate everything, man.
- I appreciate you, man. We did it.
- We did it, man. - We did what we said--
- Look where we at now.
- We back, baby. - We back, baby.
- Who would have ever thought?
- Every time I see them gates open, I'd be like,
Lordy, I'm back in here.
- I spent a lot of years destroying.
I want to spend a lot of future years building.
You know, it just feels good to be able to come back
on the right side of the law.
I hope I can offer these guys in here some advice.
I hope I can offer some hope.
This is where the ping pong table was.
I'm still so fucking good at that.
I'll smoke yo' ass.
You got to show these kids you care.
You got to show up on the holidays
when it matters the most.
These kids are used to people failing them.
They're used to people never showing up.
They're used to people never doing what
they say they're gonna do.
The easiest way to break that cycle they've created
is to show up.
- What's up, man?
JELLY ROLL: Robert Sherrill and me have been friends
our whole lives,
met each other through the juvenile system.
We both always been very passionate
about the same thing.
ROBERT: Hey, y'all, hey.
Real quick while y'all eat, it's Thanksgiving.
We could be a lot of places.
But we know y'all know we care.
And we love y'all.
I want y'all to hear from Jelly.
Jelly was in here for years in B pod, OK?
Jelly provided this meal, OK?
I want y'all to know that.
- Look, y'all, I'm not gonna feed you the same shit
everybody else feeds you.
I'm just gonna shoot it to y'all straight.
I spent my 15th birthday in this facility--
16th, 17th.
Went on to spend my 18th, 19th, 20th, 21st,
and 22nd Thanksgiving in jail.
YOLANDA: All of the youth here have been
charged with something.
It could be as simple as a runaway,
or it can go all the way up to a criminal homicide charge.
Jelly was always into something when he
was in the detention center.
He had several disciplinary reports written on him,
I'll just say that.
JELLY ROLL: I felt like I didn't have no chance
when I left here.
And I ended up going through the adult prison.
Never forget it.
I can tell y'all what you don't know about me,
probably, is that I ended up obsessing about music.
I dedicated my whole life to passing
mixtapes out around town, winning freestyle battles.
I'll out-rap everybody in this facility times three.
I'll fuck them up bad. It'll be embarrassing here.
And then I went on to do that and build a business.
I promise y'all, this ain't the average gag, dog.
Don't let anything about my presence fool you.
- They've really been drawn to him, just hearing his story
and knowing his story, that he's been in here.
When he walks through the facility, they're like,
is Jelly Roll coming over here?
Is Jelly Roll coming over here?
I'm like-- [chuckles]
JELLY ROLL: I know when you're 15 years old,
it seems like it's all over, and you'll never fix it.
But it's failures that make you great.
You just fall and get back up and go again.
I came here twice and had to go do the DCS thing
before they finally bowed me over.
I didn't learn the first two times.
Please learn this time, bro.
We gon' talk at the adult prison too.
Please don't let me see you there in four years.
- I play a guitar.
- Are you teaching yourself?
- Yeah.
[guitar playing]
♪♪ ♪♪
Oh, shit.
♪♪ ♪♪
If you can get that fire to spark
in these kids about anything, music, HVAC, laying floor,
entrepreneurialism, all these things,
if you can teach these kids and they can obsess about any
of that, it can work.
[cheers and applause]
You can really play the guitar.
I can't really play the guitar.
[chuckles] Not like that.
I can't play like that.
Please keep playing.
I'ma talk to them about getting you an acoustic.
If they'll let me get one, I'll send it up today.
- He got her, like, a really nice guitar.
So if you just could have seen her eyes when she opened it,
it's just like, wow.
It's that kind of stuff, like, it's...
It's priceless.
To be able to impact somebody
just like that.
It seems like something so simple.
But it's like you know the part--
the small part that you played in it.
JELLY ROLL: Seeing that same stale gray,
hearing these same charges,
hearing the system's still doing the same thing--
there was multiple kids that have been
in there more than nine months,
a year, year and a half--
was just so much perspective for me.
- I don't remember having this much colored shit.
I mean, like, what were we thinking last year?
- I don't know. [chuckles]
- What the hell is this?
Is this even our stuff?
- I can start wrapping the staircase.
- We can do these, yep. JELLY ROLL: Fucking score, son.
BAILEE: It's almost like I do this every year.
I'm a professional stair-lighter.
- You are a professional stair-lighter.
My daughter saved my life.
She wasn't old enough to even know it.
- I started being around my dad around the age of two.
This was when he was first starting
to pick up his music career.
But nothing was really working for him.
He didn't have a stable home.
So that's why I was never in my dad's custody.
I was with my mom.
JELLY ROLL: Bailee's mother made it hard on me at first.
She made me go to court to even see her.
We never got to build a relationship
in the early years because I was traveling so much.
We were doing 250, 300 shows a year back then out of the van.
I was a very less-than-present father,
not to mention I was drinking myself to sleep in the back
of that van every night.
Baby, we got lights on the stairs, Bailee Ann.
BUNNIE: I'm so excited.
- Yeah, I'm gonna do it right here.
JELLY ROLL: Bailee was seven years old when her mother
started really going downhill.
Felicia has fibromyalgia.
And she's always in pain.
I could see the writing on the wall,
that her pill addiction was spiraling out of control.
And then I seen Felicia end up
in a full-blown heroin addiction.
BUNNIE: He took me over to Bailee's house.
And when I walked in, my heart broke.
She was making dinner for her two cousins
that were younger than her.
And it was a loaf of bread with peanut butter.
I was like, we cannot let her live like this anymore.
JELLY ROLL: And before we could even make a move,
the police called me and told me that Bailee's mother
had stole the television of the neighbor next door
and pawned it at the local pawn shop
and I needed to come get Bailee.
And I'll never forget that call.
It was the exact same feeling I got
when that guard knocked on that cell door
and told me I had a daughter.
It was that exact same immediate rush to action.
And we went and got her and got full custody of her.
And her mother ended up battling
about a six-year-long heroin addiction.
Completely disappeared from Bailee's life
for probably four years.
And she's sober now. We're really proud of her.
But it was really rough on Bailee, man.
And it really helped me straighten my shit out
because I realized how important it was
for me to be there for her.
- Her mom was an addict, and who was I to take her--
us take her from her mom and bring her into our house?
And we're over here just popping pills
and doing the same thing.
What makes us better? You know?
I was just like, this is it. I'm done.
And I literally never touched a pill again.
- I had a very extra, interesting,
traumatic childhood.
Bunnie did. My dad did.
They're very important reasons in why my mom is in my life
now and is sober.
As a teenager, I've moved on.
And I've worked through my childhood.
But that doesn't make it necessarily "go away."
It made me who I am today.
And without that, I wouldn't be Bailee Ann.
BUNNIE: If we did what you wanted to do,
we would literally be an antique shop.
JELLY ROLL: You know how much snow globes mean to me.
Bunnie; I know. You do love a good snow globe.
- [laughs]
My dream was to build a home where my whole family
could be at, like my father did.
My father's intentions from day one
were just to get us to a better place, you know?
And I relate because as a father,
that's my only intention,
is to get Bailee to a better place.
Good job, kid.
Thank you for coming to do this with us.
[soft music]
♪♪ ♪♪
[soft music]
JELLY ROLL: I don't want my story to be where I'm
the one guy that defied the rules.
I want it to be guideposts for people to be
successful in the future.
I'm starting to realize how much of an impact I can have.
YOLANDA: When you question somebody who's been
in the business as long as I have, like,
why am I still doing this,
and then when I see you
and then what you have accomplished, you are the why.
- Yes, ma'am, thank you. - You are the why.
He's given me that fire in the belly again.
[chuckles]
JOHN: He's trying to figure out how
to be the guy in Antioch while being Jelly Roll.
The challenges will be,
I have this great responsibility.
How do I balance that with the guilt,
the burden, the survivor's guilt that we all hear about?
- As a Nashville native myself,
I have grown up with Jelly Roll.
We're the same age, grew up in the same area.
And so it is so amazing to see that he still cares
about the city that birthed him.
Jelly, it is amazing to see you pour back into a city
that loves you just as much as when you lived here
and when you were rocking and rolling in Antioch.
[applause]
JELLY ROLL: Howdy, howdy. [chuckles]
This is beyond surreal to me.
As a 37-year-old man, a father, a business owner,
a community activist, and a philanthropist,
unfortunately, I still have to mark
that I am a criminal because of a decision
I made when I was a kid.
With the Bridgestone show, we're gonna put
our money where our mouth is.
We're gonna pledge $1/4 million out the gate
into the juvenile facilities and aftercare programs
and into helping with the Impact Youth Outreach.
We're gonna first build a studio
inside of the Juvenile Justice Center.
We're gonna give away $50,000 worth of scholarships
and start putting kids in a program
to learn traits and trades.
There will be an alternate to being charged as an adult.
I think that it is important as a community
that we start with our children first.
RONALD: We're gearing up for Jelly's biggest show
of the year, 15,000 people, sold out,
the biggest production he's ever done.
A lot of moving parts.
A lot of people working very hard.
- I had some anxiety that we will not get the show
exactly the way we discussed it.
Not worried at all.
- As a community, we have to stand up,
and we have to do something about it.
I am challenging my musician friends,
roll your sleeves up, and come down to this juvenile,
and feed these kids with us,
and see the problems that we have in this community.
While you're riding up and down Broadway and making
$1/4 million a show, I'd like you to see
the side of the city that can't afford dinner.
JOHN: He's like, listen,
I want to give $250,000 to this thing.
Let's figure out how to make that happen.
So our goal would be, hopefully, to raise millions
over the next ten years.
- At 37 years old, I can only imagine how successful
I would have been at 27 years old if I would have had
the right mentorship and the right things in that juvenile
to show me other ways of life.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do now.
I'm done talking.
[laughter, applause]
[crickets chirping]
[people chattering]
JELLY ROLL: Three months ago, I feel like the Bridgestone,
for me was just this hometown hero dream.
It ended up becoming so much more
than I could have even dreamed.
- There he is. You nervous?
- Very.
Stressed almost, anyway.
For the longest, I felt like there
was no redemption in this.
I used to think my demons were just too dark to let go of.
[crowd cheering]
But now I feel a lot different.
- Close your eyes, bow your heads.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you, Lord, for getting us
here to the end of the year.
Thank you, Lord, for family, for everything we do,
and giving us the strength to do what we love.
In Jesus's name we pray--
ALL: Amen! Turn up! Yeet, yeet!
- Let's go fuck up Bridgestone
and play music with our friends!
[all shouting]
[all chanting] Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
[bell dings]
- Sometimes, a star, a superstar,
is born and raised right here in Nashville, Tennessee.
Tonight, one such superstar
is proud to return to his roots.
Presenting a proud native son of Antioch, he is
Jelly...
Roll!
[crowd cheering]
JELLY ROLL: I have never lived in the present
because I was so haunted by the past.
And I think I'm finally starting
to let my past go enough that I can actually be present.
I'm not gonna continue to carry that guilt.
I don't deserve to feel that way.
I realized that the guy standing in this arena
right this moment, I deserve that.
I'm worthy of that moment.
I'm worthy of that show. I'm worthy of that difference.
I'm worthy to be in this position that I'm in now.
This is just about believing.
You can change.
But it starts with having to believe in yourself.
We came a long fucking way, Nashville!
[crowd cheering]
You can lift others up and bring them with you.
You're worth a better life.
[dramatic music]
♪♪ ♪♪
[Jelly Roll's "Need a Favor"]
[choir vocalizing]
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ Hail Mary ♪♪
♪♪ ♪♪
- ♪♪ I only talk to God when I need a favor ♪♪
♪♪ And I only pray when I ain't got a prayer ♪♪
♪♪ So who the hell am I, who the hell am I to expect a savior ♪♪
♪♪ Oh, if I only talk to God when I need a favor? ♪♪
♪♪ And, God, I need a favor ♪♪
♪♪ I know "Amazing Grace," but I ain't been living them words ♪♪
♪♪ Swear I spend most Sundays drunk off my ass ♪♪
♪♪ Than I have in church ♪♪
♪♪ A hard cover King James only been saving dust ♪♪
♪♪ On the nightstand ♪♪
♪♪ And I don't know what to say by the time I fold my hands ♪♪
♪♪ I only talk to God when I need a favor ♪♪
♪♪ And I only pray when I ain't got a prayer ♪♪
♪♪ So who the hell am I, who the hell am I to expect a savior ♪♪
♪♪ Oh, if I only talk to God ♪♪
♪♪ When I need a favor? ♪♪
♪♪ God, I need a favor ♪♪
♪♪ Amen, amen ♪♪
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ Amen ♪♪
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ Amen ♪♪
♪♪ ♪♪
♪♪ Amen ♪♪