1
00:00:10,093 --> 00:00:12,721
I know it sounds crazy...
2
00:00:13,639 --> 00:00:14,847
but Penny was like
3
00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:19,352
some kind of, uh, revolutionary
guerrilla leader,
4
00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:24,649
uh, fighting against
this AI government thing
5
00:00:24,650 --> 00:00:27,401
that put chips
in everyone's neck.
6
00:00:27,402 --> 00:00:32,823
And the chips,
they were inserted with magic?
7
00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:35,409
N... No, no, that's...
that's the next universe.
8
00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:38,413
That's a... that's a completely
different ball of wax.
9
00:00:39,331 --> 00:00:41,666
Right, sorry.
10
00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:45,586
- "Different ball of wax."
- ♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
11
00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:51,259
And I know you.
I mean, uh, from my universe.
12
00:00:51,260 --> 00:00:53,511
But you weren't a psychiatrist,
13
00:00:53,512 --> 00:00:56,180
you were...
were a neurobiologist.
14
00:00:56,181 --> 00:00:58,724
Well, good for me.
15
00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:04,564
And this all happened
before or after the apocalypse?
16
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:08,484
Oh, before.
After civilization collapsed,
17
00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:10,570
there wasn't a big demand
for neurobiologists.
18
00:01:10,571 --> 00:01:14,115
Rat farmers, sure, you know?
(CHUCKLES) People gotta eat.
19
00:01:14,116 --> 00:01:15,533
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
20
00:01:15,534 --> 00:01:16,577
Uh-huh.
21
00:01:18,370 --> 00:01:21,706
Okay, uh, here's what
we're gonna do.
22
00:01:21,707 --> 00:01:22,915
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC RESUMES) ♪
23
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:26,043
Let's keep your Shamoxil
where it is,
24
00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:29,213
and I'm going to double
your dosage on Trafederine,
25
00:01:29,214 --> 00:01:30,257
see if that doesn't help.
26
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:35,011
- You think I'm crazy?
- Oh...
27
00:01:35,012 --> 00:01:38,056
That's not a word we like
to use around here, but...
28
00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,476
Doesn't matter. I...
29
00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:47,398
- gotta get out of this place.
- To go to a different universe?
30
00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:49,400
Not just different,
a good universe.
31
00:01:49,401 --> 00:01:52,737
You know, without giant moths,
or evil demons.
32
00:01:52,738 --> 00:01:54,406
Right, sure.
33
00:01:56,908 --> 00:01:59,952
Well, if you make progress,
34
00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:04,415
it's not out of the question
that someday you can leave.
35
00:02:04,416 --> 00:02:07,918
Someday? What... what...
what does "someday" mean?
36
00:02:07,919 --> 00:02:11,422
It means a vague time
in an unspecified future.
37
00:02:11,423 --> 00:02:13,049
♪ (SOFT DRAMATIC MUSIC
PLAYING) ♪
38
00:02:13,050 --> 00:02:14,467
That sounds like never to me.
39
00:02:14,468 --> 00:02:17,345
Oh, "never" is not a word
we use around here.
40
00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:18,639
It can be upsetting.
41
00:02:24,603 --> 00:02:28,273
♪ (THEME SONG PLAYING) ♪
42
00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:32,193
♪ Stuart tries
To reset our lives ♪
43
00:02:32,194 --> 00:02:35,488
♪ But he fails
To save the universe ♪
44
00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:38,616
♪ He's our only chance
And he tries and he tries ♪
45
00:02:38,617 --> 00:02:41,620
♪ But he fails
To save the universe ♪
46
00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:48,460
♪ (CHOIR VOCALIZING) ♪
47
00:02:55,133 --> 00:02:59,637
- ♪ Stuart fails ♪
- ♪ (THEME SONG CONCLUDES) ♪
48
00:02:59,638 --> 00:03:03,225
♪ (EERIE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
49
00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:26,665
(SLURPS, GULPS)
50
00:03:27,499 --> 00:03:28,500
STEPHANIE: Open.
51
00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:30,835
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
52
00:03:30,836 --> 00:03:32,336
Thank you.
53
00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:35,256
Oh, and remember,
Dr. Fowler upped our dosage,
54
00:03:35,257 --> 00:03:36,924
so we might wanna take it easy
for a while.
55
00:03:36,925 --> 00:03:38,719
"We"? Are you
on these drugs too?
56
00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:42,263
(LAUGHS) You're a crack-up.
57
00:03:42,264 --> 00:03:44,641
(LAUGHS)
58
00:03:45,267 --> 00:03:46,435
I like you.
59
00:03:48,019 --> 00:03:49,520
(STEPHANIE CONTINUES LAUGHING)
60
00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:52,232
♪ (DARK INTRIGUING MUSIC
PLAYING) ♪
61
00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:08,582
♪ (EERIE MUSIC OVERLAPPING) ♪
62
00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:20,302
♪ (MUSIC TURNS DISCORDANT) ♪
63
00:04:23,972 --> 00:04:25,140
♪ (MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY) ♪
64
00:04:25,891 --> 00:04:31,061
♪ (CHOIR VOCALIZING EERILY) ♪
65
00:04:31,062 --> 00:04:36,401
♪ (EERIE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
66
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:50,248
(WHIMPERS, PANTS)
67
00:04:52,751 --> 00:04:54,920
(STRAINING)
Who builds a hallway like this?
68
00:04:55,921 --> 00:04:56,962
(GRUNTS)
69
00:04:56,963 --> 00:04:58,924
♪ (MUSIC CRESCENDOES) ♪
70
00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:03,302
- ♪ (MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY) ♪
- (TAPPING ON WINDOW)
71
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:06,431
- (STUART BLOOM PANTS)
- (TAPPING CONTINUES)
72
00:05:07,349 --> 00:05:10,435
♪ (INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
73
00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:16,191
Oh, Bert.
74
00:05:17,442 --> 00:05:18,527
Thank God.
75
00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:21,696
Let's get out of here.
76
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,115
(SCREAMS)
77
00:05:25,116 --> 00:05:26,283
SHERPA:
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
78
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:27,994
- Careful there, Chachi.
- (GASPS)
79
00:05:29,204 --> 00:05:31,206
- Who are you?
- Who am I?
80
00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:33,123
I'm Mamie Eisenhower.
81
00:05:33,124 --> 00:05:35,626
(WIND HOWLING)
82
00:05:35,627 --> 00:05:37,294
I'm a Sherpa.
83
00:05:37,295 --> 00:05:39,296
- A Sherpa?
- SHERPA: Hmm.
84
00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:41,674
I thought Sherpa
was an ethnic group.
85
00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:46,053
Oh, it is. I converted.
I met a girl online.
86
00:05:46,054 --> 00:05:47,054
We did the whole thing,
87
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:48,973
you know, the classes,
the ceremony.
88
00:05:48,974 --> 00:05:51,559
Then she goes back to her ex.
89
00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:54,478
I don't know what to say.
Uh, I'm sorry?
90
00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:55,729
Oh, no,
I'm... I'm working through it.
91
00:05:55,730 --> 00:05:57,314
I'm in therapy.
92
00:05:57,315 --> 00:05:59,400
- I'm thinking about ayahuasca.
- ♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
93
00:05:59,401 --> 00:06:01,777
STUART: I... I think
that's a good idea.
94
00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:03,071
SHERPA: I don't know.
We'll find out.
95
00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:04,990
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
96
00:06:05,824 --> 00:06:07,575
There's something wrong
with the door.
97
00:06:07,576 --> 00:06:08,742
♪ (UPBEAT ACCORDION PLAYING) ♪
98
00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:11,912
♪ Hello my baby, hello my honey
Hello, my ragtime gal ♪
99
00:06:11,913 --> 00:06:15,249
♪ Send me a kiss by wire
Baby, my heart's on fire ♪
100
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:17,167
♪ If you refuse me
Honey, you'll lose me ♪
101
00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:18,294
♪ Then you'll be all alone ♪
102
00:06:18,295 --> 00:06:21,840
♪ Oh, baby, telephone
And tell me I'm your own ♪
103
00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:25,176
BERT KIBBLER: Stuart.
104
00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:27,469
How'd you get out?
105
00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:29,763
I didn't. You're very high.
106
00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:33,226
♪ ("LOONEY TUNES" THEME
PLAYING) ♪
107
00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:35,853
(STAMMERS) That's all, folks!
108
00:06:35,854 --> 00:06:37,104
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
109
00:06:37,105 --> 00:06:39,523
- Hey. How'd you get out here?
- Oh. (GRUNTS) No!
110
00:06:39,524 --> 00:06:41,942
No, you don't understand!
I can't stay here!
111
00:06:41,943 --> 00:06:43,277
None of this is real.
112
00:06:43,278 --> 00:06:45,195
- I can't stay in this universe!
- ♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
113
00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:48,283
- None of this is real.
- (SHOUTING) What's not real?
114
00:06:49,159 --> 00:06:50,868
- (ECHOING SLAM)
- ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
115
00:06:50,869 --> 00:06:52,369
(TYPEWRITER CLACKING)
116
00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:54,538
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
117
00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:57,584
- Mr. Bloom, you have a visitor.
- ♪ (INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
118
00:07:01,796 --> 00:07:04,549
- Denise?
- There's my guy.
119
00:07:06,801 --> 00:07:08,802
You gotta get me out of here.
120
00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:12,973
Oh, honey, I wish I could.
You've gotta get well first.
121
00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:15,225
Mm, there's nothing wrong
with me.
122
00:07:15,226 --> 00:07:18,395
Stuart, please, you need help.
I miss you.
123
00:07:18,396 --> 00:07:19,981
The children miss you.
124
00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:21,858
I have children?
125
00:07:23,318 --> 00:07:26,236
- Oh, my God.
- I'm a dad?
126
00:07:26,237 --> 00:07:27,655
DENISE: You're a wonderful dad.
127
00:07:27,656 --> 00:07:30,407
Jaden and Talia
love you so very much.
128
00:07:30,408 --> 00:07:32,868
Okay. I'll do the work.
129
00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:34,788
- I'll get better.
- Oh, thank you.
130
00:07:35,914 --> 00:07:37,790
Uh...
131
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:40,292
Whose idea was it to name them
Jaden and Talia?
132
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:43,253
- Yours.
- Oh, I do need help.
133
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:45,839
♪ ("WORKING FOR THE WEEKEND"
BY LOVERBOY PLAYING) ♪
134
00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:49,635
(CHUCKLES) Okay,
very interesting interpretation.
135
00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:52,430
Stuart, do you have anything
that you'd like to add to that?
136
00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:55,100
Stuart?
137
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,851
Okay.
138
00:07:57,852 --> 00:08:01,146
- (SOBS)
- ♪ Everyone's watching ♪
139
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:03,942
♪ To see what you will do ♪
140
00:08:04,943 --> 00:08:08,446
- ♪ Everyone's looking at you ♪
- (WAILS)
141
00:08:09,114 --> 00:08:10,156
♪ Oh! ♪
142
00:08:11,199 --> 00:08:15,619
- ♪ Everyone's wondering... ♪
- Mom? Dad?
143
00:08:15,620 --> 00:08:17,204
There's something
I need to get off my chest.
144
00:08:17,205 --> 00:08:18,372
(HIGH-PITCHED)
"What is it, honey?"
145
00:08:18,373 --> 00:08:19,456
(NORMALLY) "Just listen."
146
00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:20,833
"And that's why
I felt invisible."
147
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,877
"No, Dad,
you're talking out of turn!"
148
00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:28,216
♪ Everybody's working
For the weekend ♪
149
00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:34,723
♪ Everybody wants
A new romance ♪
150
00:08:36,224 --> 00:08:38,058
(INAUDIBLE)
151
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:40,936
- ♪ Everybody's going
Off the deep end... ♪
- (GROUP LAUGHS)
152
00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:44,481
- "You have a son named Stuart."
- And here's Stuart.
153
00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:46,984
"Oh, my goodness!
He's come home."
154
00:08:46,985 --> 00:08:49,903
In the past,
I'd be full of fear.
155
00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:52,906
Now, I'm just feeling the love
from deep within.
156
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:54,867
(GROUP LAUGHING, EXCLAIMING)
157
00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:56,201
That's great. Good job.
158
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:58,078
Everybody, round of applause
for Stuart.
159
00:08:58,079 --> 00:09:00,539
- (GROUP APPLAUDING)
- AMY FARRAH FOWLER:
Good job, good job.
160
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:05,170
♪ (SONG CONCLUDING) ♪
161
00:09:06,087 --> 00:09:07,672
♪ (SONG CONCLUDES) ♪
162
00:09:08,923 --> 00:09:11,008
I see you've been working
very hard.
163
00:09:11,009 --> 00:09:13,260
- I have, yeah.
- AMY: I've got a nice note here
164
00:09:13,261 --> 00:09:14,720
from your occupational
therapist.
165
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:15,971
Really?
166
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:19,224
"Mr. Bloom brings
a refreshing enthusiasm
167
00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:23,020
- to his leather work."
- I made this wallet.
168
00:09:23,021 --> 00:09:26,566
Three compartments
and... a coin purse.
169
00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:30,861
Always need a place
for your coins.
170
00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:34,531
But how are we feeling
about these other universes?
171
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:36,200
I'm glad you asked.
172
00:09:36,201 --> 00:09:41,205
I've come to understand
that I was batshit crazy.
173
00:09:41,206 --> 00:09:45,460
Not the word that I would use,
but a word that I would think.
174
00:09:46,544 --> 00:09:48,253
I still have some concerns.
175
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:50,089
- No, I'm...
- ♪ (INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
176
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:52,216
I'm eating well,
I'm sleeping well.
177
00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:54,468
Last movie night,
they played Step Brothers,
178
00:09:54,469 --> 00:09:57,764
and I laughed.
In all the right places.
179
00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:00,974
Any way you look at it,
I am well.
180
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:03,310
Well, that's not really
for you to decide, is it?
181
00:10:03,311 --> 00:10:06,231
No, it's for you to decide.
182
00:10:07,732 --> 00:10:09,901
- Have you?
- I have.
183
00:10:14,989 --> 00:10:16,908
I can make you a nice belt.
184
00:10:18,409 --> 00:10:21,496
Not necessary.
It's time you go home.
185
00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:24,998
(EXCLAIMS, LAUGHS)
186
00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:26,458
Thank you, thank you.
187
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,460
- Ah!
- You're welcome.
188
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:31,589
(SIGHS) Think you'll be letting
Bert out anytime soon?
189
00:10:32,590 --> 00:10:35,051
We don't have
a patient named Bert.
190
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:38,096
Of course not.
I was just testing you.
191
00:10:39,180 --> 00:10:40,431
You passed!
192
00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:43,268
I'm gonna go now.
193
00:10:44,936 --> 00:10:47,855
Bye! If any of my friends
lose their marbles,
194
00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:49,064
I'll send 'em here.
195
00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:51,901
♪ ("BABY, I LOVE YOU"
BY THE RONETTES PLAYING) ♪
196
00:10:58,116 --> 00:11:03,036
♪ Whoa-oh, whoa-oh, oh, oh ♪
197
00:11:03,037 --> 00:11:06,874
♪ Have I ever told you ♪
198
00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:10,377
♪ How good it feels
To hold you? ♪
199
00:11:10,378 --> 00:11:13,297
(CONTINUES OVER STEREO)
♪ It isn't easy to explain... ♪
200
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:14,631
DENISE: You doing okay?
201
00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:16,509
- STUART: Yeah, great.
- DENISE: Good.
202
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:20,888
I am so, so glad
you're coming home.
203
00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,890
- STUART: Me too.
- DENISE: Hmm.
204
00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:25,225
I mean, I don't wanna put
any pressure on things
205
00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:29,313
or push you too much,
but... (SIGHS)
206
00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:31,316
...Mama really missed
her Big Daddy.
207
00:11:34,068 --> 00:11:35,527
Uh, I... I'm Big Daddy?
208
00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:36,695
- Yeah, you are.
- STUART: Okay.
209
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:38,113
- Yeah.
- STUART: Just checking.
210
00:11:38,114 --> 00:11:40,741
"Big" is a, uh, great adjective.
211
00:11:40,742 --> 00:11:42,910
Mm-hmm. (CHUCKLES)
212
00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:45,496
Unless you're talking about
a suspicious lump.
213
00:11:46,623 --> 00:11:48,999
We just have
to make one little stop.
214
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,543
- For what?
- Oh, you'll see.
215
00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:54,129
(CHUCKLES)
Big Daddy loves surprises.
216
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:56,591
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
217
00:11:57,675 --> 00:11:58,759
Oh, yeah.
218
00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:00,677
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS,
FADES) ♪
219
00:12:00,678 --> 00:12:05,350
- (LIVELY CHATTER)
- ♪ (SOFT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
220
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:09,853
- Denise, what is all this?
- It's your exhibition.
221
00:12:09,854 --> 00:12:11,563
You're the hottest artist going.
222
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:12,689
I am?
223
00:12:12,690 --> 00:12:13,858
(ATTENDEES APPLAUDING)
224
00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:22,824
- The man of the hour.
- Bert.
225
00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:24,576
What... What are you doing here?
226
00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:26,787
What are you talking about?
It's my gallery.
227
00:12:26,788 --> 00:12:28,705
Okay, come on,
everybody's dying to meet you.
228
00:12:28,706 --> 00:12:29,915
Oh, uh, help me out.
229
00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:33,710
Am I down-to-Earth famous,
or more asshole famous?
230
00:12:33,711 --> 00:12:35,712
- Asshole.
- Great.
231
00:12:35,713 --> 00:12:37,965
- Yes, it's me!
- (ATTENDEES EXCLAIM)
232
00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:40,592
Good to see you. (CHUCKLES)
233
00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:42,511
- FAN 1: Wow.
- Thank you so much.
234
00:12:42,512 --> 00:12:44,471
Denise, I'm gonna need
some Purell.
235
00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:46,056
Thank you.
236
00:12:46,057 --> 00:12:48,809
I don't even remember painting
most of these.
237
00:12:48,810 --> 00:12:51,436
Good to...
Good to see you, yeah.
238
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:54,231
- ♪ (DISCORDANT MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
- That's, uh...
239
00:12:54,232 --> 00:12:56,024
- FAN 2: (ECHOES)
I love your work.
- What's that?
240
00:12:56,025 --> 00:12:57,402
FAN 3: (ECHOES) I'm a huge fan.
241
00:12:59,070 --> 00:13:01,614
♪ (MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪
242
00:13:02,865 --> 00:13:04,741
- ♪ (MUSIC CRESCENDOES) ♪
- (DEMONIC LAUGHTER)
243
00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:07,244
- (MEAT SIZZLING)
- ♪ (MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY) ♪
244
00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:08,663
M'kay!
245
00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:12,082
Who's ready for a hot dog?
246
00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:13,417
- I am!
- Me! Me!
247
00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:15,085
Fresh-squeezed lemonade.
248
00:13:15,086 --> 00:13:17,004
TALIA AND JADEN: Yay!
249
00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:18,505
(CHUCKLES)
250
00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:20,590
- How you doing?
- Great.
251
00:13:20,591 --> 00:13:23,051
I can't believe I thought
there was a better universe
252
00:13:23,052 --> 00:13:25,637
- than this one right here.
- Oh. (KISSES, CHUCKLES)
253
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:27,473
BARRY KRIPKE: (WITH RHOTACISM)
Welcome back, neighbow.
254
00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:32,602
- Kripke?
- Guilty as charged.
255
00:13:32,603 --> 00:13:33,687
We're neighbors?
256
00:13:33,688 --> 00:13:36,189
I wike to think we're
a wittwe more than neighbows.
257
00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:37,775
I held your son at his bwis.
258
00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:40,528
We're Jewish?
259
00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:43,155
So, how was the woony bin?
260
00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:45,032
It's not a loony bin, Barry.
It's a hospital.
261
00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:47,659
- Yeah, fow woonies. (LAUGHS)
- Barry...
262
00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:50,162
I'm kidding. I'm a kidder.
Just ask my husband.
263
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,873
Is this guy
giving you the business?
264
00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:54,166
- Gary?
- Hey, Stuart.
265
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,626
♪ (QUIRKY MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
266
00:13:56,627 --> 00:13:59,797
- I... gotta go lay down.
- Are you okay?
267
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:01,466
I'm not sure.
268
00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:05,218
Wooks wike they didn't tighten
all the scwews there.
269
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:07,472
- You're terrible.
- Oh, and you wove it.
270
00:14:08,473 --> 00:14:10,058
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
271
00:14:11,225 --> 00:14:13,769
STUART: Denise, I'm gonna go
for a little walk,
272
00:14:13,770 --> 00:14:16,563
- clear my head.
- DENISE: Want me to come with?
273
00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:18,357
STUART: That's okay.
I won't be long.
274
00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:21,110
♪ (SOFT EERIE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
275
00:14:28,576 --> 00:14:30,370
♪ (INTRIGUING MUSICAL STING) ♪
276
00:14:34,665 --> 00:14:36,041
♪ (MUSIC CRESCENDOES) ♪
277
00:14:36,042 --> 00:14:38,378
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSICAL STING) ♪
278
00:14:39,337 --> 00:14:41,839
♪ (MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪
279
00:14:43,549 --> 00:14:45,635
♪ (MUSIC CRESCENDOES, FALLS ) ♪
280
00:14:55,311 --> 00:14:59,524
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC
OVERLAPPING) ♪
281
00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:04,028
(CAR ENGINE STARTING)
282
00:15:06,531 --> 00:15:08,532
- (BELL DINGING)
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
283
00:15:08,533 --> 00:15:12,078
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
284
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:21,629
(SHOP BELL CHIMING)
285
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:39,896
KYLE: You're not listening
to me, okay?
286
00:15:39,897 --> 00:15:43,233
The centrifugal force
of Thor's hammer
287
00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:44,568
is what allows him to fly.
288
00:15:44,569 --> 00:15:46,570
TREVOR: But Thor is throwing it.
289
00:15:46,571 --> 00:15:47,988
That violates
Newton's first law.
290
00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:51,783
Uh, hey. Hey, hey.
Settle an argument for us.
291
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:55,912
Laws of physics don't apply
to Norse gods, right?
292
00:15:55,913 --> 00:15:57,080
Of course not.
293
00:15:57,081 --> 00:15:59,124
Thor, along with
the other inhabitants of Asgard,
294
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:02,085
exist outside the paradigm
of the physical universe.
295
00:16:02,086 --> 00:16:04,839
- (GASPS) How do I know that?
- ♪ (DRAMATIC MUSICAL STING) ♪
296
00:16:05,715 --> 00:16:08,634
♪ (MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
297
00:16:23,107 --> 00:16:24,108
Oh, boy.
298
00:16:33,618 --> 00:16:37,078
♪ (MUSIC TURNS EERIE) ♪
299
00:16:37,079 --> 00:16:39,040
(WHOOSHING WARBLE)
300
00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:41,083
♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪
301
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:44,669
(INSECTS CHIRPING)
302
00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:47,172
- How was your walk?
- Good.
303
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:51,134
- What you got there?
- Uh... bought a comic book.
304
00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:53,011
Hmm. Since when do you read
comic books?
305
00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:55,723
People read comic books.
(YELLS) What is with you?
306
00:16:58,017 --> 00:17:02,647
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
Sorry. That was too loud.
307
00:17:23,292 --> 00:17:26,169
STUART PRIME: "It was like
any other Tuesday at Caltech.
308
00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:29,506
- Smart people doing smart stuff.
- ♪ (INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
309
00:17:29,507 --> 00:17:31,633
STUART PRIME: Leonard, Sheldon,
and Howard constructed
310
00:17:31,634 --> 00:17:34,470
a Vari-state
Quantum Entanglement Device.
311
00:17:35,555 --> 00:17:37,681
Stuart Bloom stopped by
to share the news
312
00:17:37,682 --> 00:17:39,350
of a clean colonoscopy.
313
00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:41,101
In his excitement,
314
00:17:41,102 --> 00:17:42,769
he knocked the device
off the table."
315
00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:44,938
- (KNOCKING ON DOOR)
- Honey, everything all right?
316
00:17:44,939 --> 00:17:46,857
Uh, yeah, give me a minute.
317
00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:49,067
STUART PRIME:
"From that point on,
318
00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:51,903
Stuart was entangled
with the fate of the universe."
319
00:17:51,904 --> 00:17:53,613
- Oh, Jesus.
- DENISE: You need the MiraLAX?
320
00:17:53,614 --> 00:17:55,699
Uh, no, no. I'm okay.
321
00:17:55,700 --> 00:17:57,701
Don't strain.
Remember, that's how Elvis died.
322
00:17:57,702 --> 00:18:00,412
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sure, sure, sure.
323
00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:02,372
STUART PRIME:
"Messages were sent to help him,
324
00:18:02,373 --> 00:18:04,249
but the big dope didn't notice."
325
00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:06,501
I'm a big dope?
You're a big dope.
326
00:18:06,502 --> 00:18:09,045
DENISE: If you need it,
there's a Fleet enema
under the sink.
327
00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:10,589
Great, thanks.
328
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:12,257
STUART PRIME:
"So you've gotta fix it.
329
00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:13,967
We're going
to send you more instructions,
330
00:18:13,968 --> 00:18:17,137
but first, you have to escape
from this prison."
331
00:18:17,138 --> 00:18:19,347
- "Prison"?
- ♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
332
00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:21,601
BERT: (ECHOES)
"None of this is real!"
333
00:18:22,226 --> 00:18:23,603
Coming!
334
00:18:32,194 --> 00:18:35,238
♪ (MUSIC CRESCENDOES) ♪
335
00:18:35,239 --> 00:18:37,240
- ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
- (TOILET FLUSHING)
336
00:18:37,241 --> 00:18:39,327
- (BIRDS CHIRPING)
- (KNOCKING ON DOOR)
337
00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:51,588
- What you got there, neighbow?
- Uh, nothing, nothing.
338
00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:53,298
Doesn't wook wike nothing.
339
00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:54,842
Mind your own
damn business, Barry!
340
00:18:56,761 --> 00:18:57,803
That was vewy wude.
341
00:18:58,929 --> 00:19:02,808
♪ (INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
342
00:19:04,352 --> 00:19:07,395
- (BUTTON CLICKING)
- (DEVICE WHIRRING)
343
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:08,689
What's that?
344
00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:14,402
- You can see it?
- Yeah, I can see it. What is it?
345
00:19:14,403 --> 00:19:16,613
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
346
00:19:16,614 --> 00:19:20,868
You ever wonder
whether any of this is real?
347
00:19:21,702 --> 00:19:22,827
What are you talking about?
348
00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:28,792
Doesn't bother you
that everything seems perfect?
349
00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:30,877
No. This is the life
we dreamed of.
350
00:19:30,878 --> 00:19:31,920
STUART: Exactly!
351
00:19:31,921 --> 00:19:35,548
When have my dreams
ever come true?
352
00:19:35,549 --> 00:19:38,343
- Stuart, you're scaring me.
- You think you're scared now?
353
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:39,886
♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
354
00:19:39,887 --> 00:19:41,972
You might wanna tighten
your sphincter.
355
00:19:42,723 --> 00:19:44,557
♪ (MUSIC TURNS DRAMATIC) ♪
356
00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:48,396
(DEVICE BEEPING, ROARING)
357
00:19:49,313 --> 00:19:51,481
(PORTAL WARBLES)
358
00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:53,441
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
359
00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:56,654
♪ (MENACING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
360
00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:12,920
(GASPS)
361
00:20:14,088 --> 00:20:15,881
(RETCHES) Yuck!
362
00:20:17,258 --> 00:20:18,843
- (PODS HISSING)
- (FLUID SLOSHING)
363
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:21,846
(BERT GRUNTS)
364
00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:25,433
Ah! I'm bald.
365
00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:28,893
What'd you do? Where are we?
366
00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:30,730
- (ELECTRIC HUMMING)
- Uh...
367
00:20:32,022 --> 00:20:34,607
(ECHOING)
It looks like The Matrix to me.
368
00:20:34,608 --> 00:20:38,069
Uh, technically,
we're out of the Matrix.
369
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:41,239
So, what, the house,
the kids, the cable TV,
370
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,576
- none of that was real?
- Oh, man. I wiked it there.
371
00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:46,202
I mean, I was homosexual,
372
00:20:46,203 --> 00:20:48,204
but my husband
was a weal wooker.
373
00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:52,375
- Guys, this is The Matrix.
- Yeah, we know.
374
00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:54,794
No, it's literally a scene
from the movie.
375
00:20:54,795 --> 00:20:58,632
- (ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)
- You're right.
376
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,342
We're still trapped.
377
00:21:01,343 --> 00:21:03,928
Are you sure?
It wooks wike we escaped.
378
00:21:03,929 --> 00:21:05,889
That's what
they want us to think.
379
00:21:05,890 --> 00:21:08,309
- Who is "they"?
- I don't know.
380
00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:12,480
Hang on.
381
00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:16,192
♪ (EERIE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
382
00:21:20,070 --> 00:21:23,114
(HUMMING WARBLE)
383
00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:26,827
♪ (DRAMATIC CHORAL MUSIC
PLAYING) ♪
384
00:21:36,712 --> 00:21:40,049
(BUZZING WARBLE)
385
00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:43,176
♪ (MUSIC CRESCENDOES, FADES) ♪
386
00:21:43,177 --> 00:21:45,386
♪ (EERIE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
387
00:21:45,387 --> 00:21:46,597
(BREATHES SHARPLY)
388
00:21:51,602 --> 00:21:52,603
You guys ready?
389
00:21:54,021 --> 00:21:56,314
There's no way to know
where we're gonna land.
390
00:21:56,315 --> 00:21:58,733
Anywhere,
as wong as I'm stwaight.
391
00:21:58,734 --> 00:22:00,151
That is so inappropriate.
392
00:22:00,152 --> 00:22:02,570
(GROANS) I know, I know.
It's not a choice.
393
00:22:02,571 --> 00:22:05,740
- (GROANS)
- (DEVICE BEEPING, WHIRRING)
394
00:22:05,741 --> 00:22:07,910
(DEVICE HUMMING)
395
00:22:09,411 --> 00:22:11,496
(PORTAL WARBLES)
396
00:22:11,497 --> 00:22:13,540
- (GRUNTS, PANTS)
- (ECHOING RUMBLE)
397
00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:16,793
(ANIMALS CALLING)
398
00:22:16,794 --> 00:22:19,629
Well, we're not in Pasadena.
399
00:22:19,630 --> 00:22:21,841
- Is it real?
- BERT: Seems real.
400
00:22:23,717 --> 00:22:26,678
Sand, organic material, clay.
401
00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:29,180
Could be kaolinite
or montmorillonite.
402
00:22:29,181 --> 00:22:31,140
What's that mean?
403
00:22:31,141 --> 00:22:32,183
It's dirt.
404
00:22:32,184 --> 00:22:34,436
Why didn't you just say "dirt"?
405
00:22:35,271 --> 00:22:36,646
I was showing off a little.
406
00:22:36,647 --> 00:22:38,439
- (LEAVES RUSTLING)
- Do you hear something?
407
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:41,151
♪ (MENACING MUSIC PLAYING) ♪
408
00:22:52,621 --> 00:22:55,791
Uh... no hurt.
409
00:22:57,167 --> 00:23:00,629
- Peaceful.
- We come from far.
410
00:23:01,255 --> 00:23:02,464
We good.
411
00:23:03,883 --> 00:23:06,427
- What do you think?
- I don't know.
412
00:23:07,177 --> 00:23:09,345
They sound stupid.
413
00:23:09,346 --> 00:23:12,640
♪ (DRAMATIC RHYTHMIC MUSIC
PLAYING) ♪
414
00:23:12,641 --> 00:23:13,683
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
415
00:23:13,684 --> 00:23:18,063
♪ (THEME SONG PLAYING) ♪
416
00:23:53,265 --> 00:23:56,435
♪ (CHOIR VOCALIZING) ♪
417
00:24:04,735 --> 00:24:08,197
♪ (THEME SONG CONCLUDES) ♪