Hey, come on in. Good to see you.
We're obviously behind
so I'm just gonna jump straight into it okay?
So Robbie's your reader today.
Camera's right here.
We'll do one take.
If we have any feedback, we might do it again.
We might not, but have some fun.
Robbie?
Camera please.
- Whenever you're ready.
Okay, that was a little rude.
Sorry. I-- I do that sometimes.
- No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled.
I guess he needed space or something.
I don't know.
I think I blacked out.
- So we just woke up ready to end it all.
- Yeah, and I'm standing there brushing my teeth
and he's just in the bathroom there
breaking up with me.
- That's so unhinged.
- If I wasn't already late for work,
I probably would've begged him to reconsider.
- Oh my God. Don't beg, your better than that.
- I'm really not.
I did everything right.
I gave him everything I thought he needed
and somehow I'm the one that ruined his life.
- Did he say that?
- No. I'm assuming.
- You're being dramatic.
- Do you wanna hang out tonight?
- No. I have that party for my coworker, Seth, tonight.
You should come!
- I really don't wanna go to a party.
- Come on, we closed early for Seth's last day.
Everyone's gonna be there.
- Everyone? That sounds miserable.
- Yeah, that's the point.
Don't sit alone in the place you were dumped.
Come be with people.
- I'm not gonna know anybody.
- You can't just know me for the rest of your life.
- I can't?
- You're coming.
And I'm hanging up before you can complain anymore.
I'll pick you up on the way.
[high heels clacking]
- You good?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
Do you wanna grab dinner after this?
- I am meeting my girlfriend's parents tonight.
- Ooh. A momentous occasion.
- Yeah!
I totally would though.
Chin up Robbie.
I'll see you tomorrow?
- Yep.
[high heels clacking]
[Robbie sighing]
[upbeat music]
[Emma knocking]
- Hey! - Hey!
Oh my God, it's so good to see you.
- I know!
Seth, this is Robbie.
Um, we went to high school together.
- [Seth] Nice to meet you.
- Where's the guy you're seeing?
- God, he's here somewhere.
I don't know.
Ah, there he is.
Emma was just asking about you.
- I'm here!
Oh!
- Hm, that's yours. Jesus.
- All right.
Seth talks about you all the time.
- Aww. Uh this is Robbie.
- Hi Robbie.
- [Robbie] Hi.
- Okay. Okay.
Uh, we gotta get to know each other so.
Go. - Okay.
- Go.
[Emma laughs]
- Alright.
So you just stare at actors all day?
- Yeah, pretty much.
- And do you enjoy that?
- I mean, I don't enjoy actors,
but I do enjoy my job.
- Maybe you can cast the movie adaptation of my book.
- Are they turning your book into a movie?
I didn't think it was out yet.
- He's very sure of himself.
- He should be. It's a great book.
- There have been some nibbles.
A lot of companies are interested in the rights so.
- When does it come out?
- June, he's got a box full of copies in the bedroom.
- They're called galleys.
- He's got a box full of galleys in the bedroom.
[guy laughs]
Like anyone would know what that means.
- I, I told you what they were called.
You could at least use the right terminology.
- Uh what do you do?
- I'm freelance.
- He's unemployed.
- I'm not unemployed. I collect paychecks.
- You collect tips.
He's an assistant to a drag queen.
He collects tips.
- Mhm, well I was making more
than you were making at the bookstore.
- Book sales will sustain the both of us.
I'm sure.
- I'm gonna get a drink.
- Oh, can you get me one?
- Mhm.
- Thanks.
- This is a nice house.
[Seth laughs] - Oh my God.
My grandparents died here.
My mom lets me stay for free
so long as my roommate and I don't touch anything.
So what's your deal?
Single? Taken?
- Single.
- Recently yeah.
- Perfect.
I've got some friends I'd love to introduce you to.
Oh Tyler!
Oh my God, do you two know each other.
- Excuse me.
- Okay, sure.
[bottles clinking]
- What are you doing here?
- I'm meeting Lauren.
- Who is Lauren?
- My coworker.
- I, I don't know who that is.
- Jesus Christ. Of course you don't.
- You don't have to be a dick.
We already did this today.
- You're right.
I work with Lauren.
You've met her plenty of times.
She's friends with Seth.
- Why are you meeting her here?
- I had a pretty rough day.
She invited me out so just being a good friend.
- Yeah, Emma and Seth worked together.
I guess Emma had the same idea.
- Guess that makes a little bit of sense now.
- I don't want this to be weird, I.
- Are you sure?
- You know what? I can leave.
- Whatever, Robbie.
Make your grand exit or just,
stay, and be a fucking adult.
- Okay, leaving is the adult thing to do.
- Everything can't always be
exactly the way that you expect it to be.
- I'm not gonna apologize for having standards.
- Have your standards,
but don't be surprised if no one can live up to them.
- Do you want me to leave?
[Robbie sighing]
[tuneful music]
- We're one of those couples that argue
and then, they get out of the car and they're like
oh, yeah hi guys what?
- No but y'all are so cute.
- We try. [girls laughing]
- He's all right some times.
- Just need to find me a man like that.
- So who drove here? You or him?
- Well, this is my house.
- Oh that's valid. [Emma laughing]
- Right we are at your house. [Emma laughing]
- Yeah. Um, anyway.
[door creaks]
- You good?
- Oh, yeah. [Robbie laughs]
The introvert in me is just uh shutting down.
- It got pretty heated in the kitchen.
- You saw that?
- Didn't everybody?
[Cameron laughing] Sorry.
- Yeah, that guy's my ex.
- Oh, really?
Oh damn.
- Yeah, he [Robbie coughs]
broke up with me this morning.
- And he's here now?
Oh baby.
Yikes.
- I didn't want to come.
- But you're here.
You came.
Everybody's together there.
- I guess so.
- You are really about to be mopey and sad
over a man!
Wow. Hmm - Let me be sad.
- No! No, baby I'm a cancer.
Being emotional is my favorite thing.
But you can't be sad in a room full of people.
Look, anyone in that room would love
to not make you feel sad.
Except your ex. Is he still here?
[both men laughing]
I'm sorry. [Cameron laughing] I had to.
- I'm gonna be honest.
Social interaction just feels
overwhelming right now.
- Mhm.
- I spent a lot of time catering to Tyler and our friends
and I'm pretty sure all those people
are gonna take his side.
Starting from scratch just feels like too much work.
- I'll be your friend.
I mean, feel free to say no if you don't --
- No. No, [Robbie laughs] it's not, it's not no.
I just. I don't know, I don't know what to say.
You're so matter of fact about it.
- Mhm. People who pass up on making new friends
are the same people who complain about not having any.
Girl beggars can't be choosers.
Be my friend! [both men laughing]
Come on.
- Okay!
- There is one condition.
- Oh my God already? - Yeah mhm.
- Complicated friendship ugh. - Dang!
It will be sometimes, people are complicated.
My best friend in middle school, her name was Beth.
She was kind of the worst.
She was mean to everyone, teachers, and other kids.
I saw her yell at her mom
over a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
[Cameron laughs]
But she was always nice to me
because we were loyal to each other.
When we first started hanging out
she made me promise that no matter how terrible things got
we always had to stick by each other.
We could be mad, but, we can never hate each other.
- Sounds like a great friend.
What happened to her?
- I don't know.
She moved sophomore year
and we spoke for a few months but, lost contact after that.
I still think about her, even now.
I think I'll always love her.
Even if things were never easy.
- Ever.
- Girl. No.
Never.
She knew she was difficult.
That promise,
it was a warning.
But, I stayed anyway.
- You didn't have to do that.
- No a promise is a promise.
With me, you're not getting some like casual friend.
You're getting a best friend.
No matter what,
it's guaranteed.
And I ask for the same.
Do you have any conditions for this friendship?
Hmm?
- Uh.
Yeah, never, ever, ever introduce me to an actor.
[Cameron laughs]
- Okay deal! Conditions established!
- What are you doing?
- Pinky swear.
[Robbie scoffing] - No, I am an adult man,
I'm not gonna pinky swear.
- Link with my pinkies right out!
- Oh ho ho ho. - Mhm.
Call me your friend and I'll call you mine.
- You're so intense about this.
- Say it back!
- Say what?
- Call me yours!
- No! - Yes!
- Why? Why is this important to you?
- Call me yours!
- Okay. I'll call you mine!
- Deal. Okay, now we've stuck together forever.
[Cameron squeals]
[Cameron laughs]
- This whole thing makes me wanna be friends even less.
- Too bad, we're linked forever.
- I think you needed that more than I did.
- All right. Let's get drinks.
I have a very specific order
and I need you to learn it tonight.
- Specific?
- Mhm. There's two ingredients.
Tequila and soda.
[Robbie laughs]
Honk.
[people laughing]
[tuneful music]
- Oh, it's, I mean, it's just like a--
- We're going on bestie vacation.
[tuneful music]
(people laughing)
- I don't care.
♪ Cause I will be with you
♪ Just need you to hold on
♪ Don't try to hide your teeth when you're smiling at me ♪
♪ You make my face all red and my heart racing ♪
♪ I can feel your eyes when you're looking at me ♪
♪ Trying to camouflage but I still see ♪
♪ You can never hide from me ♪
♪ From me
♪ And you know