-Previously on "Brilliant Minds"...
-I talked to Mrs. Torres.
We came up with a new plan for Jorge's treatment.
-You don't speak to another family member
without me present.
-This reaction is irrational.
-Get out of my office.
Now!
-She wanted more time.
You gave her that.
You extended her life.
-It felt like I extended her death.
-Michelle, we were so good together.
What happened? -We didn't communicate.
-Are you guys back together? -Yeah. We are.
[ Chuckles ]
-30-year-old schizoaffective male
complaining of daily chest pains.
-What's going on? -It's a sign of liver failure.
-Whether right or wrong,
you simply cannot get a transplant
if you're entirely alone.
-Sam, there's some people here to see you.
-I'm at Hudson Oaks. They won't let me leave.
-Aah! -You won't be fighting back anymore.
-[ Groans ]
Isn't that right, Oliver?
[ Dramatic music plays ]
[ Insects chirping ]
Your escape back tonight
reminded me of that little stunt
you pulled at the hospital gala.
You remember that?
At the time, I thought, "This guy's a force!"
But in a good way.
Now, the staff member you assaulted needs stitches.
-You're holding me against my will.
I want to leave.
-We have been over this, Oliver.
I am worried that you have not made any progress
since you came to us --
voluntarily, I might add.
You're paranoid. You're defensive.
You won't let us help you.
It's high time we be honest about why you're here.
Either we talk about him
or we keep doing this same song and dance.
[ Tchaikovsky's "Pas de Deux ('The Nutcracker')" plays ]
**
-Elongate.
**
[ Ice cracking ] -Put me down!
Put me down! Aah! [ Groans ]
[ Thuds ]
[ Theme music plays ]
**
-I've never had an attendant yell at me like that, Terry.
It was disturbing.
Unprofessional. B-Borderline psychotic.
I mean, Dr. Wolf is completely out of line.
-Yeah. That's fair.
But we've spent, uh, an inordinate amount of time
in our sessions talking about your boss.
Okay, you got to remember that holding on to anger --
-It's like drinking poison
and expecting the other person to die. Yeah.
-Well...
You work together, right?
Yeah. You got to learn how to coexist.
I think he's misjudged you.
My advice?
Try to show him who you really are.
[ Jazz remix of "Joy to the World" plays ]
-That I can do.
**
-Isn't this a little premature?
We still have leftovers from Thanksgiving.
-I don't care.
This is my favorite time of year --
the tree lighting at Rockefeller Center,
all the window displays on Fifth Avenue,
our hospital holiday gala.
Just Christmas brings back a lot of sweet memories.
Oh!
Like my little Ollie coming back from school
with the most...peculiar homemade ornament.
-It's not peculiar. It's tungsten.
-Oh. -I had to corrode the metal with ferric chloride
to etch the chemical symbol on it.
-Quite the feat for a third grader.
-Mm.
-So, I know how you hate the pomp and circumstance
of hospital galas,
so you have my permission to skip tonight.
It's a little early Christmas gift from me.
-What's the catch? -No catch.
Honey, I know that I'm not gonna be the one
that you turn to for help.
God knows I never turned to my mother
when I was in any kind of crisis.
But I want you to understand that it's okay -- -Mom, stop.
I can handle the gala,
if it means you'll stop using these impromptu visits
to psychoanalyze me.
Don't make me change the locks.
**
-That megawatt smile could solve the energy crisis.
What's got you so happy? -That sweet taste of freedom.
After months of mediation over custody and assets and alimony,
my divorce is signed, sealed, and delivered.
-That's my girl! -[ Laughs ]
-Looks like we both got reason to celebrate.
I got my kids for Christmas.
Starting to see a day where Amy and I can amicably co-parent.
-Well, amen to that. -Yeah.
-How about we toast our wins
tonight at the gala? -Watch your back! Behind you!
-I never say no to an open bar.
That's my cue. See you tonight?
-Okay. -Alright.
-3...2...1.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
-Fresh off his tour of duty in the E.D.
Welcome back to Neuro. [ Chuckles ]
-Never leave us again.
-I won't. How can I help?
-You got a spare liver?
-You can start by calling every hospital
in a 500-mile radius.
No one cares that Sam has his family to support him.
Every transplant program thinks he's too big of a risk
because of his schizophrenia.
So we're casting a wider net.
-I found a couple shelters he stayed at.
They're gonna send me character references.
We can see if they strengthen his case.
That's amazing. -Thank you.
[ Whispering ] Lock it down already.
-[ Whispering ] I'm trying.
-Look, I don't have time for this.
It's opening night, and I need to get back to rehearsal.
I refuse to let that bitch Nina take my place.
-I already hate her. I'm Dr. Wolf.
I'm here for your neuro consult.
And your name is...
the Sugar Plum Fairy?
[ Chuckles ] I'm sorry.
No, I am a huge fan of the City Ballet.
My mom took me to "The Nutcracker"
every year growing up. -I'm glad to hear it.
Can we skip the formalities
and get the hell out of here, please.
-Uh...
Yes. Uh, okay.
So, Juliette, your file says
that you had a long ICU stay here for sepsis
and respiratory failure due to a bad pneumonia,
but you left early against your doctor's advice?
-That was nearly three months ago
and totally unrelated.
-Hi. I'm Dr. Porter.
Looks like we were both paged for a consult.
-Yeah, I have it handled. You can go.
-If two doctors speeds us up, by all means stay.
-We heard that you fell and hit your head.
How are you feeling now?
-Please. I never fall.
My partner dropped me during the Grand Pas, on purpose.
He's dumb as rocks and sleeping with my understudy.
They've had it out for me since day one.
Zora, my artistic director, thinks that I'm being paranoid.
-Zora Flynn? She's an institution.
-Yep. She'll be there till she dies.
And then they'll probably dip her body in formaldehyde
and prop her in a chair forever.
-Don't give Dr. Wolf any ideas.
Okay, just...
try to relax.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
Deep breaths. Deep breaths.
-My eyes are burning.
Why are my eyes burning?
I feel like I'm frozen.
-Why is it so cold in here?
[ Ice cracking ] Something's happening.
W-Where am I?!
-Juliette, you're -- you're in the hospital.
-No, no! I have to get back.
-Okay. Alright.
-Juliette is an imaging now.
When we were examining her,
she became altered, confused, disoriented.
We're testing to make sure
that the fall didn't cause a brain bleed
or any other serious problems.
-Her timing could not be worse.
-She said her partner dropped her on purpose.
-[ Scoffs ] Of course she did.
-Juliette loves to play the victim.
No. She panicked, lost position,
knocked Mikhail down in the process.
This was her fault.
-You don't have a very forgiving teaching style, do you?
-[ Under breath ] Pot meet kettle.
-Ballet is an unforgiving world.
Juliette has...
incredible promise.
But I admit I've been worried about her lately.
She used to be fearless.
Not anymore.
To be frank, she hasn't been the same
since she left your hospital.
-Well, to be honest,
it's remarkable that she's back to dancing at all.
She was septic, intubated.
We would have kept her longer had she agreed to stay.
-But you signed her discharge paperwork.
-Oh, she was improving.
She needed the time to rehearse.
-Well, I wish she had taken the time
to show up for her follow-up appointment.
She could be at risk for a host of complications
just from her degree of deconditioning alone.
-I have been at this a long time,
and what we're dealing with is a textbook case of stage fright.
Fortunately, that's why we have understudies.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
-Yeah.
-Thank you so much. I'm on my way.
A shelter in Mott Haven has intel on Sam.
They need my credentials,
so I have to head down there in person.
-Uh, the hospital gala's tonight.
Uh, I finagled Dr. Wolf's plus one,
assuming we'd have reason to celebrate.
Um, you think your mom could babysit?
-Oh, I don't know. It's kind of last-minute.
-Yeah. Nah. It's -- It's cool.
Yeah. No, I totally get it. Um. Another time.
-Okay. [ Chuckles ]
-Have you ever seen Markus in a tux?
I mean, I got your back, Miche,
so, you know, I'll fight those ladies off for you.
But just in case I'm outnumbered,
you should probably come.
-I'll see what I can do. [ Chuckles ]
[ Dramatic music plays ]
-[ Blows raspberry ]
[ Laughing ] Bro, you got, like, zero game --
Ze-ro. [ Chuckles ]
**
-Dr. Pierce, you have got to take me shopping.
You are the best-dressed doctor in the outer boroughs.
-Thank you, Amelia.
To what do I owe this honor?
-Just making some last-minute adjustments for tonight.
Hudson Oaks is sponsoring the gala.
-Yes. Dr. Landon told me that.
-She is a real hoot. -Mm-hmm.
-And that hairstyle.
Ooh! Très chic! -[ Laughs ]
-I just want Bronx General to know
that Hudson Oaks is here for you.
We want to be your go-to resource
anytime a patient might need long-term care.
-That is very generous.
But we make all of our decisions on a case-by-case basis.
-Of course. You know best. -Mm-hmm.
-[ Chuckles ] -Excuse me?
Gorgeous bouquet.
What is the occasion?
-They are from Wolf.
I am...
officially divorced today.
-Hallelujah.
[ Both laugh ]
I finalized mine three years ago.
Never looked back.
Are you on the apps yet?
-Oh, I don't think I'm ready for all that.
-No, no, no, no, no.
I can guide you through all the pitfalls.
For starters, the camera adds three inches.
[ Knock on door ] -Oh. -Ooh. Hi, Dr. Wolf.
It's a pleasure to see you. -Sorry.
Uh, face blind and in a rush.
I have a ballerina who's a bit of a tough nut to crack.
She could use some of that Carol magic.
Are you free?
-Yes. -Good.
[ Indistinct P.A. announcements ]
-Juliette, what happened right before you collapsed?
-You look like you went somewhere else.
-It happens a lot when I'm dancing.
I'll be in the middle of rehearsing,
and suddenly it's like...
I'm transported somewhere else.
[ Gasps ] [ Wind whistling ]
[ Tchaikovsky's "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy" plays ]
Sometimes it's like I'm freezing, trembling,
cold in my bones... [ Shuddering ]
...like my body is made of ice.
Other times, it feels like I'm choking.
[ Choking ] I can't breathe.
I can't scream. [ Malevolent laughter ]
But that's not even the worst of it.
I try to get away.
And then I feel a sharp pain,
like I'm being stabbed in the back repeatedly.
**
And then it's over.
**
Until it happens again.
**
-Some highlights from Juliette's ICU stay.
She was intubated, which would explain the choking.
Ice packs were used to bring down a fever,
hence freezing onstage.
And she had a lumbar puncture,
which she is reliving as being stabbed in the back.
-Where is this going?
-Our patient is experiencing ICU PTSD
from her three-week stay in the hospital.
-Mm-hmm. She's having flashbacks,
and not to events that actually happened,
but to the hallucinations she had
while she was sedated, but delirious.
Her mind is trying to make sense
of everything that happened to her.
Exposure therapy might be our best shot to get her through.
but she needs to work her way up to that.
-With all due respect,
what if this has nothing to do with the ICU?
She's a dancer.
I know the type. Dated a few.
It's an unrelenting lifestyle --
The diet, the hours on their feet,
not to mention certain stimulants.
-You're a second-year resident
speaking to the head of psychiatry about a psych issue.
-I'm just voicing an alternative theory, which is what we do.
-I'd rather you keep your alternative theories to yourself.
-Or what? Are you gonna scream at me again?
By all means, I would love to have a witness this time.
I made a mistake with the Torres family.
Why can't you let this go?
-Because your mistake almost cost my patient his life!
-Enough!
-And you've never made a mistake
that cost a patient their life?
[ Dramatic music plays ]
**
[ Door opens, closes ]
-Things aren't working out with my resident.
I want Charlie Porter off my team.
Out of the hospital would be ideal.
-Slow down.
Did he do anything specific to warrant this?
-Yes. He's arrogant.
He disagrees with me at every turn.
He undermines me.
He believes that practicing medicine his way
is the only way. -You're right.
Who could work with someone like that?
-Dr. Porter tried to transfer Jorge Torres to hospice
without consulting me. -But he didn't.
And I'm guessing you set him straight, which is your job.
Look, having a differing opinion
isn't enough to fire someone, Wolf.
If you think he's a bad doctor,
it's your job to make him a better one.
-Normally, I'd agree with you,
but, Josh, I'm telling you, Porter is a lost cause.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
[ Door opens, closes ]
-Nerves getting the best of you, Markus?
-Things are going great between me and Michelle,
but I can tell she's getting cold feet.
And I was the one who broke her heart.
I wasn't committed. I wasn't ready, you know?
I was afraid to be a dad.
But...
I'm not gonna screw it up again.
I want to ask her to move in with me.
-Damn! Grand gesture.
[ Chuckles ] I like it.
-I just want us to have a fresh start, you know?
-Charge nurse, please call the operator.
Charge nurse, please call the operator.
-Okay. Why do I feel like you're getting cold feet now?
-[ Scoffs ] -What's up?
[ Down-tempo music plays ]
-Damn mirror-touch. [ Chuckles ]
**
When I went home to Dallas for Thanksgiving,
I reconnected with one of my, uh, old team doctors.
We got to talking,
and he offered me a spot in his residency program.
-Oh. In Texas?
-They have a top-tier sports clinic.
And I'll still be doing neuro, just in a sports context.
I never imagined moving home anytime soon,
but this is like my dream job.
-So why do I sense, like, you don't want to do it?
Man, what's keeping you here?
Ah. It's me, huh?
-Man... -[ Chuckles ]
**
-You mentioned being intubated was a scary experience.
Let's start there.
I want you to follow the light with your eyes
and tell me all about it.
-Before I fell unconscious, I...
[ Dramatic music plays ]
I couldn't catch my breath.
When they intubated me, I panicked.
They had to hold me down. It was awful.
-Okay. Let's stay right there.
Keep following the light and tell me what comes up.
-I couldn't relax my body.
I could hear Zora's voice in my head.
"You're as stiff as a board." -Mm.
And how did that make you feel?
-Like a failure.
I felt weak for being so scared.
-Those are called negative self-beliefs.
-But I also remember telling Zora to shut up in my head.
-Oh. -I stood up for myself.
-That's more positive.
Let's go with that.
Describe that memory for me one more time.
-I'm in the hospital.
I'm -- I'm sick.
I feel like I can't breathe.
That's okay. I-I need to get healthy.
Doctors and nurses --
they intubate me because they --
they want me to get better.
It's scary.
But it's nice, having people take care of me.
Makes me feel...
**
...worthy. -Do you often feel unworthy?
-It's the nature of the gig, Dr. Pierce.
There are literally a thousand women waiting to replace me.
-Can you try to reframe that for me?
-I have worked my ass off to be the best at what I do.
Thousands of women want to dance like me.
But...
I am singular.
-Damn straight.
-[ Chuckles ]
-We're still working on finding a hospital
that will list Sam.
I'm sorry I don't have better news.
-But I'm not giving up.
-That's rare,
the kind of attention you're giving him.
-Speaking of which,
when was the last time you ate?
-[ Mutters ] -Go get some food.
Take care of yourself.
-Thank you.
[ Monitor beeping ]
-...please report to Room 312.
...please report to Room 312.
-How's it looking?
-I was about to check his eyes,
but vent settings are good.
Only intubated for neuro exam and airway protection.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
**
-Dana...
tell me what you see.
**
-Unilaterally enlarged and sluggish pupils.
His cerebral edema could be worsening.
-No, this isn't happening.
Dr. Nichols can fix this. -Mm-hmm.
-And -- And we will get him listed somewhere,
and everything's gonna be alright.
[ Music climbs ]
[ Soft music plays ]
**
-I'm not dancing tonight, am I?
-That's up to you, Juliette.
We recommend that you remain
in the hospital for one night,
face down those fears before they get worse.
It's what's called exposure therapy.
We want to replace that terrifying narrative
that your mind created with a real-life one.
-This is the room
where you spent three weeks with pneumonia.
**
We have a detailed record of every blood draw,
every IV drip, every fever medication.
It will give you a clear sense
of what actually happened in here.
-Or, if you'd like, we can discharge you,
and you can make it in time for opening night.
-And we'll keep our fingers crossed
that you won't have another episode onstage.
I'm Nico.
I was one of your nurses when you were here.
I assisted with your lumbar puncture.
[ Blade shings ] -[ Groans ]
-The Rat King.
-I prefer Short King, but I...
[ Chuckles ] And if you do decide to stay,
you and I can binge-watch my favorite prima ballerinas --
"The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City."
The entire Season 1 plot is smelling like hospital.
-Don't explain that to me. I don't want to know.
-I've sacrificed a lot to be a dancer,
but now I'm just supposed to risk it all
to spend a night in a hospital room?
-Well, what if you're actually risking it all by leaving?
[ Dramatic music plays ]
-Once I'm done with the procedure,
Sam's coags need to be tight and under control.
Every second that the bolt is in his skull,
there is a risk of bleeding.
It is an ever present danger.
We'll monitor him around the clock.
[ Knock on door ] -Hey.
-Silva got word from the nurses in transplant
that there is a liver en route to Bronx General,
but the intended recipient spiked a fever.
He and Sam have the same blood type.
-It could be a match.
We have to get him listed here.
-Dr. Kinney, even if it doesn't go to the other patient,
it could always go straight to someone else on the list.
There's no guarantee.
But the head of the Transplant Committee,
Dr. Walker, is back in town for the holiday gala tonight.
I hear he has been persuaded in the past
to take cases back to the committee.
Apparently, he's a bit of a sap.
Maybe in person,
we could get him to see what his team missed on paper.
-You do your part, we'll do ours.
Let's get gussied up. We're going to get Sam a liver.
**
-Dr. Nichols suggested I pull at this guy's heartstrings.
[ Chuckles ] Any tips?
-If he doesn't take Sam's side after hearing his story,
he doesn't have a heart. -Agreed.
Just be you, Kinney.
-Guys, I just met with a shelter that knows Sam.
He stayed there a bunch,
and apparently, he showed up at their mobile blood bank
every month to donate blood.
Like clockwork, they said.
He never missed it. They had it all logged.
Look. -Oh, my God.
-This demonstrates commitment and organization,
and it shows that Sam can handle
post-transplant immunosuppressants.
Michelle, this is huge! Thank you.
[ Uplifting music plays ]
[ Exhales sharply ]
-You look great. [ Chuckles ]
-Nice work.
So, uh, meet you at the gala?
-Well, actually, um,
I was thinking maybe you should just go solo.
Liam throws a tantrum if I'm not there at bedtime.
You know that.
So it's probably just easier if I stay home
and you go do your thing.
-Why do I feel like you're trying to wreck this
before it even starts?
I-I thought we were all-in.
-[ Sighs ]
[ Soft music plays ]
-You know I'm crazy about you, Van.
I always have been, and I probably always will be.
I don't know if I could handle another heartbreak,
but I know Liam can't.
So -- -No, no, no, no.
There won't be another heartbreak.
You're it for me.
Like, I-I don't think love is about butterflies.
I think it's about finding someone
who calms your nervous system.
And I want to be that person for you,
because you're that person for me.
I promise you, okay, I'm -- I'm not going anywhere.
[ Soft music plays ]
**
-Okay.
-I'll see you there.
-Yeah? -Yeah.
-[ Chuckles ] -Mm.
[ Monitor beeping ]
-Okay.
[ Monitor beeping ] -[ Shuddering ]
-...the woman whose birthday was celebrated...
-Hey, it's okay.
-The monitor is just measuring your heart rate.
I can turn the volume down if you want.
-No, it's okay. I...
I need to experience all the triggers.
I can't dance with PTSD. I need to get better,
even if it means Zora's gonna ice me out for weeks.
-It's infuriating, isn't it?
I mean, that our mentors punish us?
-I find it...
motivating.
I had this epiphany today.
I don't want her approval.
I want her to look at me onstage one day
and realize that...
I'm better than her.
She doesn't know it now, but she's creating a monster.
[ Jazz remix of "O Tannenbaum" plays ]
**
[ Indistinct conversations ]
-Hudson Oaks must have some deep pockets,
because this party is nice!
-[ Sighs ] I'm gonna take a quick lap,
see if I can spot any committee members.
**
-One night with him, you'll forget you were ever married.
-What?
-Shoot your shot, Dr. Pierce,
or somebody else will.
**
-Any eyes on the target?
-Not yet. -Oh!
I came up empty on finding anyone
in the Transplant Committee.
-But no stakeout is complete without pigs in a blanket.
-2:00. That's Walker.
-Okay. It's now or never.
But do you want me to --
-No. I got this.
I've been practicing my speech in my head all day.
-...short game couldn't be worse.
So I let him know you play a little worse,
I can call this game a charity case,
write it off on my taxes.
[ Laughter ]
-[ Laughs loudly ]
Dr. Walker, can I talk to you for a second?
-Uh, certainly.
Excuse us, gentlemen.
-Mm-hmm. -Of course.
-Hi. I am Dr. Ericka Kinney. -Hi.
-I'm a neurologist at Bronx General.
I wanted to talk to you about one of our patients
your committee denied listing for a transplant.
Sam Mapesbury is in our care with acute liver failure.
There is a liver arriving right now
that we believe he is a match for.
Sam is on death's doorstep,
but if you put him on that list --
-There were a number of reasons
we decided that case was a poor candidate for transplant.
-Yes, but I have new, relevant information that proves
that he is capable of handling post-transplant care.
-All the reasons we declined to list your patient remain true.
This is all too little, too late.
I can't take this back to the committee.
[ Sad music plays ]
**
[ Audio feedback ]
-If -- If I could have your attention, please.
Um, thank you all for coming tonight.
None of this would be possible without my mother,
uh, who planned this whole event,
even after she retired.
[ Applause ]
My question for everyone here tonight is who deserves care?
People always say doctors are the heroes.
That's a bit aggrandizing for my taste.
I know firsthand that patients are the real heroes,
like a young man named Sam Mapesbury,
who has been grappling with mental illness
and subsequently acute liver failure.
He is in a hospital room at Bronx General right now,
fighting for his life.
He will die without a new liver.
But the harsh reality is that patients with mental illness
are often summarily rejected from organ-transplant lists.
Every other hospital in this city
found a reason not to list Mr. Mapesbury for a liver.
But...
at Bronx General,
we have doctors like Bernard Walker,
the head of our transplant team,
who didn't hesitate for a moment
to recognize this young man's potential
and put him at the top of the list.
Dr. Walker is giving Sam Mapesbury
that second chance at life,
and it's because of people like him
that I am proud to work at Bronx General,
where we believe that everyone deserves care.
Thank you.
[ Applause ]
-Yes.
[ Mid-tempo music plays ]
**
-Bernard...
what an absolute angel you are.
For any of you motivated to donate,
this is what your dollars are going towards.
Thank you again, Bernard.
[ Applause ]
**
[ Dinnerware clinking ]
-Hudson Oaks would like to match any donations up to $100,000.
[ Cheers and applause ]
**
-What the hell did you just do?
-Uh, I made you a hero,
and I helped you save a young man's life.
-Our donors seem to approve.
Or I can walk onstage and say that Dr. Wolf had it wrong,
that you actually don't want to listen
and that you're gonna let him die.
-[ Sighs ] Fine.
-You win. He's on the list.
Know this --
I have a very long memory.
[ Down-tempo music plays ]
**
-Go. -[ Laughs ]
[ Chuckles ] Excuse me. [ Chuckles ]
-[ Exhales sharply ]
-Carol.
Is your ex-husband on the premises?
-What? No. Why?
-Because that is what the kids would call a revenge dress.
-[ Chuckles ]
Oh, this old thing?
-Mm. -[ Chuckles ]
-Well, you clean up pretty well yourself, Dr. Thorne.
-Careful, Dr. Pierce. My ego thrives on validation.
-[ Chuckles ] -Speaking of which,
I got to hand it to your boy Wolf with that speech.
He is annoying as all hell,
but when it works, it works.
-Um, I prefer audacious.
But yes, sometimes his spontaneity does drive me to drink.
-Mm-hmm. -[ Chuckles ]
-Oh, Dr. Thorne,
well, contrary to popular belief,
you may in fact be a gentleman.
-Is that my drink? -Mm.
-Babe, I said just vodka.
-Oh. -Dr. Pierce, your dress is fire.
-Thank you, Justine.
Oh.
I didn't realize you two were...
-A total heat score?
-[ Chuckles ] -JK.
No, I just worked down in the ED a lot,
so it was only a matter of time before we caught a vibe.
[ Chuckles ]
[ Indistinct conversations ]
-Um...
-So she's how you know what the kids are saying.
[ Soft music plays ]
**
[ Dinnerware clinking ]
-What an inspiring evening this has been.
Every year, we invite one of our most promising residents
to share the story of why they became a doctor.
Please help me welcome the newest member
of our Neurology department, Dr. Charlie Porter.
[ Applause ]
-Wait. Did you know about this? -No.
-Thank you, Dr. Landon, for inviting me to speak.
Um, it's, um, ironic that I work in a hospital
because for years, I avoided them.
Um, when I was 10 years old,
my mother was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor.
Uh, before her diagnosis,
I remember she was happy all the time.
Her eyes would light up when I walked in a room.
She never missed a bedtime.
And before I'd fall asleep, she'd say to me,
"I'm so lucky to be your mom."
But I was the lucky one.
-Lord, I am not gonna be able to get through this.
-My mom was one in a million.
After she got sick,
um, she missed a lot of bedtimes.
I remember the light in her eyes faded.
I remembered that she suffered immensely.
But most of all, I remember her doctor.
He was young, smart, dedicated, and I looked up to him.
He told my dad that he'd be with us every step of the way,
and he was.
And he is the reason that I pursued medicine...
-[ Exhales sharply ]
-...not because he saved my mom,
but because he dangled the possibility that he could.
He let my family cling to that belief.
Which is why
we were so completely unprepared when she died.
-Are you okay?
[ Dramatic music plays ]
-When I got to medical school, I realized that my mother
never had any chance of surviving her prognosis.
I realized that her doctor sold her a fantasy
because he couldn't bear to help her face the truth.
I believe that as doctors,
we are not in the business of selling fantasies.
I believe that we are in the business of telling the truth.
So all I can hope...
**
...is that when I'm honest with my patients...
I'm making my mom proud.
[ Applause ]
**
-Mrs. Mapesbury.
It's okay. It's okay.
-Where are you taking him?
Wait. Where Are you taking him? -It's okay, it's okay.
-We got him listed.
We got him a liver.
It's a match. -[ Gasps ]
-He's going into surgery right now.
**
-[ Voice breaking ] I can't believe it.
I can't believe it!
-Clamped in. We're ready to go.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
-[ Sobs ]
**
-It's okay. -[ Sobbing ] Thank you.
-It's okay.
-You look upset, Dr. Wolf.
Is it because I upstaged you?
-You didn't come work for me to learn from the best.
You came because what? What -- to punish me?
-I wanted to meet the doctor who ruined my life,
make sure that you would never ruin anyone else.
-So you want to get me fired?
-Well, it wouldn't be the first time.
-Charlie, when I was treating your mom, I was young.
I was learning.
I still am. But she --
She didn't want to give up. She refused to give up.
She wanted to keep fighting. I cared deeply about her.
-No, don't -- don't do your whole empathy thing.
You were her doctor.
I was her son, okay?
I cared deeply, not you.
-I know what it's like to lose a parent.
-No, you don't!
Your father's alive.
He just chose not to be with you.
Twice, from what I've heard.
-You're angry. I understand that.
But lying to me, infiltrating my department,
trying to get revenge is not gonna bring her back.
-If you think this is just about my mom,
maybe you really weren't with us every step of the way.
My father couldn't handle
all of the suffering that you put her through.
So he hit the bottle, hard.
Four years after my mom died, he drank himself to death.
I have been alone since I was 14, Wolf.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
-I'm so sorry.
-I don't forgive you.
-Not processing trauma --
[ Sighs ] It can break a person.
-Mm.
**
-What is this? -An address.
It's where your father is.
It wasn't very hard to find either.
But I don't think you even tried, did you?
Oh. Like you said,
not processing trauma can break a person.
So let's see who breaks first.
**
-I want to thank everyone
for your record-setting donations tonight.
All of us here at Bronx General are incredibly grateful.
And I hope that you'll indulge me in one final tradition.
[ Piano plays ]
**
* Have yourself a merry little Christmas *
* Let your heart be light *
* Next year... *
-What? What is going on? Was Charlie's speech about...
-* ...out of sight *
**
-* Have yourself... *
-Looking good, Dr. Nichols. [ Chuckles ]
You sure you're not into women?
-Not, uh, since basic training.
[ Both chuckle ]
**
-* From now on... *
-So, what did I miss?
Who embarrassed themselves this year?
-Ah. I believe that might have been me.
Mm-hmm. -Impossible.
[ Both chuckle ]
-Hey, can I ask?
-* ...as in olden days *
-Have you noticed anything...
off about Wolf?
**
-I miss Jen Shah.
She's in federal prison now.
[ Cellphone chimes ]
[ TV plays indistinctly ]
**
-My friend's at the ballet.
Nina just got a standing ovation.
**
Good for her.
Every dog deserves her day.
-[ Chuckles ]
**
[ Door closes ]
**
-Sam's almost out of surgery.
I just checked in.
Zero complications.
-That sounds like a reason to celebrate.
[ Both laugh ]
[ Cork pops ] Mm.
-[ Chuckles ]
-You did an incredible thing, getting Sam on that list.
-I think Wolfe gets the credit for that one.
-But that would have never happened without you.
You saved his life.
You did.
**
You're amazing.
**
-So are you.
**
-* Have yourself a merry, little Christmas *
* Make the Yuletide gay *
* From now on, our troubles will be miles awa-a-a-a-y *
* Here we are, as in olden days *
* Happy, golden days of yore *
* Faithful friends who are dear to us *
* Gather near to us once more *
* Through the years, we all will be together *
-You get stood up?
-I think so.
It's fine.
Probably putting too much pressure on her.
-She'll come around when she sees you play kickball.
-* ...star upon the highest bo-o-o-ough *
-Want to get a pizza?
-I love pizza.
-* Have yourself a merry, little... *
[ Siren wailing ] * ...Christmas now *
[ Mid-tempo music plays ]
**