(relaxing music playing)
Elena Vernham: My loves...
I was once tired, lethargic,
weighed down by the stresses of modern life,
until I unlocked the ancient power of the potato.
And now, thanks to the healing properties of potato steam,
I have never felt healthier, happier, stronger.
With consultation from top practitioners
in the art of country medicine,
I have purged my body of toxins
and transformed my life.
Now, a fresh breeze flows through the walls of the people's palace.
Follow our lead, my loves,
and let the natural goodness of our beloved land
unlock a stronger, more confident you.
There he is, the big cheese.
"Chief of Palace Health and Safety"
we're meant to call him.
Six years studyin' medicine,
now I'm boilin' spuds for Dr. Gorilla.
Elena's stopped focusing on mold,
so I will give him that.
-What's the mood outside? -The people support Elena.
They love to see America punched in the mouth.
Herbert Zubak: Hey!
-You will strive to have a graceful mind, yeah? -Yes, sir.
-Now clean that shit up. -servant: Yes, sir.
See, he's not right upstairs.
Elena's got to him.
-Oh, pity the poor butcher. -Yeah, I do.
Herbert: Hey! Come on!
Here. The boy's pills.
-What do I owe you? -Oh, fuck off, puss.
(Agnes chuckles)
White House sources say they are alarmed
by Chancellor Vernham's aggressive rhetoric.
We're even hearing reports that Judith Holt,
chair of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee,
will be taking time in her tour of the region this week
to visit the Chancellor.
So, thoughts? Too glam for the farmers?
They're sending me a mule.
Some "Chairman of the Senate Foreign fucking What-Have-You."
No President, no Vice President,
just some frequent flyer corn fucker
from the farm states.
A prestigious committee, I'm told.
Committees are for bored housewives.
Too frilly. That one.
And, um, Lenny, you're not concerned, then?
-With what? -Just all your spiky talk
about the West these last few weeks.
-The possible blowback. -Oh, (laughs) poor Nicky.
You worried they're going to drone strike you in the jacuzzi?
(laughs) No.
No, but with our business ties
in Europe and America.
All our foreign pals, Laurent, Carla?
-Buscombe? The Como Consigliere? -Fuck them.
True friends stay true. Quislings scatter.
Clearly, the President is signaling
that he would like to normalize relations
with this once-staunch ally and vital trade partner
before tensions escalate further.
The question is, will Chancellor Vernham be receptive?
And while approval has climbed to 75,
-your highest in four years... -(news report continues)
I should caution you.
My agents in the private sector are feeling some
market jitters
since the cobalt partnership with America has stalled.
Some wonder whether the new, shall we say,
confrontational attitude towards the West
-might be having an averse-- -(Elena interjects)
I like to slice the egg myself.
Of course, my love.
Thank you, Mr. Laskin.
I'm sure that will be more than enough.
Uh, dear, before I forget,
uh, we've had a few complaints about the aroma.
(door shuts)
What sort of complaints?
Well, primarily that the palace
smells like an Irish whorehouse.
(sighs) Well, tough tits.
The potato steam is purifying.
I can finally breathe now that Herbert
has sluiced all the Western shit from my system.
(door opens)
Oh, good morning, Herbert.
-Good morning, Elena. -We are well, aren't we?
Yes, we are.
We had fun last night, didn't we?
(chuckles) Yes, we did.
And what did we do, large one?
We ran through farmers' fields and howled at harvest moons.
-No-- -Mm, we certainly fucking did.
-Superb horseplay, wasn't it? -It certainly fucking was.
I wonder,
where will we go tonight?
Wherever we like.
Black radish from the homeland.
Let me see.
-Elena: Ah. -Huh, your spleen's a little muddy.
-Hm. -This mustard will help.
Elena: Go on, then.
Slap me up like a sandwich.
Nicholas Vernham: Uh, I'm sure you know, Corporal,
that both Elena and I have medical degrees.
Uh, I must admit, I'm not familiar with your techniques.
-They are from my mother. -Nicholas: Oh, right.
Country medicine, is it?
-The only medicine that works. -Nicholas: Uh-huh.
One might argue aspirin and chemo
occasionally do the trick, but sure.
(both humming)
(Elena gasps, continues humming)
(upbeat orchestral theme music playing)
♪♪
(theme music concludes)
-Morning, Madam. -Morning.
-Morning, darling. -Hello, Oskar.
-Everything alright, Madam? -Yeah.
Mr. Bartos will arrive at noon
for the sugar beet farmers' event.
-Oh, just send him my way, please, Agnes. -Yes. Will do.
Do you know, our Oskar's new epilepsy treatment
-really is a miracle, isn't it? -Ah.
Agnes: Yes, he does seem very well, Madam.
No fits. Not a single one.
It's truly astonishing, this folk science.
You see, that's what our boy needed all along.
Not those fancy Western pills.
-It's fascinating. -Yes, fascinating, Madam.
Hm.
Herbert: Black radish. Open wide.
Ahh...
Yes. Crunch, crunch, crunch. Crunch. Yes, yes.
(cheery music playing at event)
(indistinct chatter)
(birds chirping)
Schiff: Look at him. Cock of the fucking walk.
Hm. I mean, she had infatuations before, though.
Who was the last meter man? Um, Sebastian.
-Mm. -She sacked him because his jaw clicked when he ate.
Well, I suspect that this one
may be more than an infatuation, Victor.
Well, how do you think we should play this?
-Ah, patience, my son. -Mm.
I think Bartos will, uh, sort her out.
Well, he'll certainly try.
If the cobalt deal falls through,
his profits are fucked like a spring donkey.
They're sending me a woman.
Can you believe it?
The whole relationship on the line,
and they're sending me a fucking woman.
I've met Senator Holt before.
She's quite sensible... for an American.
You know what this is, Emil.
They just want to keep China's claws
-out of our cobalt. -Of course.
The American empire's broken, barbaric.
We know this.
-But they've always backed you. -(scoffs) Placated me.
The tacky blonde from the tacky country,
always shunted to the side.
Elena, I've been your friend and associate for many years.
You're tough, you're clever,
and you know just how to please them
to get them to do what we want.
-This is your magic. -(Elena sighs)
Calendula tea for, uh...
-Oh, right. Yeah. -...for, um--
Go on. Say what you really mean, Emil.
You worried about your purse, greedy guts?
Your purse, Elena. Our purse.
-(sighs) -If you were to risk sanctions--
-There won't be sanctions. -So you say.
But remember, we are a small country.
We're like mice in a bathtub.
Three inches of water, and we drown.
So, you don't have to bend the knee,
but you do have to play their game.
-Do you see? -I won't be kicked like a dog, Emil.
But I won't dynamite the supply lines either.
Alright? Is that what you wanted to hear?
Yes, it is. Thank you.
Sweet relief.
Right. Well, go and root around
for a cabbage roll, big boy.
-(Emil laughs) -What's this for?
Calendula. It, uh, wakes up your muscles.
Oh, good. Mustn't let those nod off.
We are not mice, you know?
Don't worry, Herbert,
this is just the way things work.
(guests chattering)
In high spirits lately, isn't she?
It's good to have a dash of rural flavor in her stew.
As a garnish if nothing else.
Well done to you.
(Herbert grunts)
(guests applauding)
Elena: I'd like to congratulate our nation's beloved
sugar beet producers on a bountiful harvest.
And here she is, folks:
the first sugar beet of the season!
♪♪
Well, this is dignified. Clapping for a tuber.
Mm.
-Push! -I am!
Herbert: No, push for real!
No, I am pushing!
No, you are not pushing. Come on.
Fucking yes, I'm fucking pushing.
No, you're fucking not!
-Yes, I am! -Harder!
-Yes. -You see?
-Yes. -Push each other.
-Yes, wait-- -Yeah, come on.
-Harder! Come on. -Yes.
-Harder! -Oh!
-Come on! (panting) -(Elena gagging)
(Elena retching)
(Herbert panting)
(Elena breathing heavily)
What's happening to me?
-(pants) Good things. -Why did I vomit?
-It's trying to get out. -What is?
-The poison. -What?
It's been inside you for years,
all this shit in this... (sniffles)
in this place is--
Like that rubbish Bartos said,
mice in the bathtub.
-You've taken it in. -(both panting)
Now you have to flush it out.
(groaning, panting)
You have to flush it all out.
-(audience laughter on TV) -Since when--
Since when do you think I don't wear enough of this?
Well, I-- Close your eyes.
I just think you're gonna like this a little better
because--
-Close, close, cl-- -Rachel (on TV): Blow it.
Ross (on TV): (blows) Sorry.
'Cause, um, I think this will make you
a little more sophisticated.
-Rachel: Sophisticated like a hooker? -(Ross laughs)
Nicholas: Lenny, I'm worried he's pushing you too hard.
W-We don't really know this man, after all.
And given what he did to those protesters--
Oh, Nicky. No.
No, no, best I've felt in years.
Okay. Well, (laughs) actually, my love, um...
-Mm. -...not that I've been keeping tally or anything,
but, um, you know it's been nearly a year
since we were last intimate,
so if you are feeling better,
perhaps we could, you know,
give it a go again soon, or--
(light music playing)
Night-night, Lenny. (kisses)
♪♪
(indistinct chatter)
(Euro EDM music playing in club)
Must we always meet down here?
Oh, you no like? I find it quaintly venereal.
Before we start, sir, many apologies for the wait.
The state of record-keeping in Westgate is appalling--
Look, I-I'd prefer not to linger,
so let's be brief and discreet.
-Utterly, sir. Yeah. -Just-Just tell me who he is
-and what you think he wants. -Right.
Most of it's your typical rural pathos.
No, father to speak of, some learning troubles,
failure to thrive, et cetera.
The other boys start to hurt him.
He starts to hurt them back, harder.
A bit of country discipline, some self-harm,
all standard issue
until... we get to the mother situation.
Okay, what sort of mother situation?
This is what Corporal Zubak did to his mother
when he was 14.
When asked why he did it,
she said, "I don't have a clue."
-Oh. -Right. Oh!
He repents, enlists, bulks up,
becomes violent again.
Stuck at Corporal, never gets beyond NCO.
Then, at Site Five, when the workers start protesting,
he's the first to shoot.
Twelve miners wind up dead because of him.
This time, he truly cracks up.
Near suicide, they say.
That's when she picks him from the rubble.
How much does Elena know?
Only the initial background check.
I've held off on this new intel.
Look, can we talk about what's really fucking happening, please?
-She-- -(patrons laughing)
She's been tuning us out since the old man died.
She nearly went mad from mycophobia.
And now, she's flipped her wig for King Kong.
-Watch your tongue, you prick. -W-Well, I'm merely reminding us
that she has had Goin and Kershaw put in prison.
So, who's next, the entire holding company?
That's us, all of us.
We cannot allow this to continue.
Or maybe, he's just another of Madam's passing infatuations.
Uh, that is, of a platonic sort, of course, sir.
Laskin: You know her better than we do, sir.
How serious is our predicament?
They have, uh, I don't know, a-a connection,
but if you go for him now with the dirt you have,
you may only push her closer to him.
-I'm afraid he's right. -If you really want to hurt him,
you need something truly damaging
and of recent vintage.
I really don't see how you can stand this place.
Blur your vision, breathe through your mouth.
How else does one get through life?
♪♪
(grunts)
You must strive to have a graceful mind.
-Herbert: Harder! -Elena: Harder!
(moaning)
(heavy breathing)
(pensive music playing)
-(knocks on door) -What is it?
Good morning, Corporal. The sperm whale oil you requested for, wha--
-What was it? -It's for her skin.
What have you done to my headboard?
-What are you doing to yourself? -It's nothing.
-Bullshit, it's nothing. -Hey! Don't talk to me like that.
Oh, shush, you ridiculous person.
I know who you are. You can't scare me.
Come on, let's get you fixed up.
(Agnes scoffs)
I'm not your nursemaid.
You should leave my son alone and worry about your own health.
-I'm fine. -Fine. You're a stuck pig.
(Herbert grunts)
-What are you doing, beating yourself up? -I don't know.
I don't mind it.
-Well, I bloody mind it. -It's good for me.
(Agnes laughs)
Shame on you.
It won't help, you know.
Up.
I have to do it.
I deserve it.
-(melancholy music playing) -Don't tell Elena about this.
It's gonna be a long road for you.
Be careful who you walk it with.
Miss Agnes! How are you, dear?
Uh, yeah. I'm fine. Is everything--
Oh, no, no, no, no. Everything's fine.
We're all so glad to see your boy in such fine health
and without modern pharmaceuticals.
Remarkable, isn't it?
Is there anything I can help you with, Mr. Laskin?
No anticonvulsants, no phenytoin?
A bit of black radish
and your boy's epilepsy is cured.
(laughs) Miraculous!
The Chancellor couldn't be more pleased.
And we like it when she's pleased, don't we?
(chuckles) Yeah, we do.
Yes.
We don't like showing her
the grubby truths.
Look, it's alright.
Your boyfriend did you a favor,
getting you the pills.
We know, and it's fine.
We all do each other favors, don't we?
(mischievous music playing)
-You alright, Herbert? -Hm? Uh, yes, Elena.
Something's bothering you.
Um, have, have you not-- Uh.
Have you noticed the last few dreams
have been, um, different?
Hm, different for you, how?
I guess, um, a bit spicier.
Mm.
Yeah, I, I suppose they have been a bit.
And sometimes... q-quite spicy.
Well... I like a bit of spice.
Hm? Spice is nice.
Yes, um, Elena.
(tense music playing)
♪♪
Elena: There she is, Miss America.
Oh, our good friend, Mr. Bartos.
Looking to line his pockets.
♪♪
Senator, welcome. Nicholas Vernham.
Yes, hi, a pleasure. I'm Judith.
Thank you for hosting. This is quite a place.
Thank you. The Chancellor's waiting for you.
Mm.
♪♪
Yes, here you are.
-Welcome. -Judith Holt: Thank you.
-Lovely to meet you, Madam Chancellor. -Oh, good.
You're comfortable then? Your accommodations alright?
Yes. Lovely. We're staying at the Bartos Imperial.
Oh, very nice. Mm.
Love this, kingfisher blue.
-Oh. -We'll try not to get blood on it.
-Joking. -Okay, well,
we'll keep the gloves on.
Here, we can sit.
'Kay.
So, busy time, then.
Yes, well...
just a mini tour of the region,
but I've made our visit here a special priority.
No, I meant for your President,
seeing as he couldn't make it.
As you know, I'm not an official emissary of the White House,
but I can assure you, this is a priority for the President.
Of course, I'm teasing. We can tease, can't we?
Sure. You bet.
And you're having a little poke around
the Faban Corridor as well, I hear?
The Faban Corridor is part of the region, so yes.
Our work is holistic. We like to see prosperity everywhere.
I'm sure you do.
So, let's dive right in, shall we?
I believe, and I'm sure the President agrees,
it's time we spoke frankly with you.
We'd like to get things back on track here.
-Uh-huh. -After all, we've enjoyed a very strong partnership
with you over the years.
We're big fans, honestly.
Strong woman leader, providing for her people,
bolstering civil society, resisting China, so on.
We love all that.
So, it would be a shame to spoil it all
-over some crossed wires. -Elena: Right.
You feel as though our wires have been crossed?
Well, I think our last few communications
have felt a bit abrupt.
Right.
Judith: That said,
we are willing to take some responsibility
-on our end for any issue. -Issue?
No, there's no issue.
No, there's just, um, what this is.
You know, the bargain.
And I think my country's more than held up
her end over the years, don't you think?
I see your point.
After all, we let you dig our earth for a pittance.
We provided refueling and airspace support
for your wars in the Middle East.
We handed you hundreds of dossiers on supposed
Russian cyberterrorists working in our country.
We swore off China and her Belt and Road.
We let your CIA run its black sites here,
right here, on our sovereign soil.
You shoveled your shit on our doorstep for years
and told us we were happy to eat it.
If you'll pardon my expression.
I might add, we also shoveled
quite a bit of investment your way as well,
and quite a bit of patience
while you worked out your civil and...
-press freedoms-- -Oh, no, no. (laughs) It's alright.
We're not, we're not arguing.
This is not a confrontation right now.
We're just, we're just saying what's true.
Look, (clears throat) I think we hear each other.
Which is why we'd love to consider something in the shape of a reset.
A reset?
A sense of greater equity moving forward.
-I'm told the President wants this. -Yeah? You sure?
-Should we shoot him a text? -(laughing)
The President does want this.
And what would a reset look like?
First and foremost? Access.
Much greater access for you and your ambassadors
to the President and to the financial levers.
Easing restrictions on exports to your country.
Reopening the American school in your capital.
And... helping with something
we should've helped with a long time ago:
Granting you full NATO member status.
No more "aspiring member" limbo.
Plus, we can help with the EU of it all,
Schengen group, everything.
The entire game could change for you.
We'd love to see that. We want to see that.
We believe in this partnership.
So, I want you to ask yourself,
are you ready to take this next step with us?
(mischievous music playing)
♪♪
Judith: We don't want to undermine your authority in the region.
We want to enhance it.
We see you as a true visionary,
which is why we'd love for you to return to the cobalt project.
(slight chuckle) I'm sorry, but the terms were not acceptable.
Absolutely. We get that.
But we just think you should give it another look.
My people need to be respected.
And they will be. We want you to feel like equals.
We consider China's push into Europe a threat to freedom,
so we'd like your continued support there.
And what about the Faban Corridor?
We know the Corridor is of great importance to you, historically,
and you wish to reunify.
It's a conversation that's a bit too big even for this room.
(chuckles) So, (clears throat)
but there could be a chance there, one day, maybe.
But first,
we need you to demonstrate credibility to us.
Trustworthiness.
All we're asking is that you follow our example
of honesty and consistency,
and be a little more flexible as you've been in the past.
After all, that's why the United States backed your campaign
from the very start because we knew we could trust you.
Um, hi.
(chuckles)
(tense music playing)
Um, I'm sorry. Where were--
What, uh, were we?
These rooms get so stuffy with all this oxygen-sucking, ya know?
Uh-huh. Yeah, I guess so.
Let's take a tour around the palace, yeah?
-There's so much to see. -A tour?
Uh, right now?
Sure, okay, if ya like.
I do like.
-Mm-hmm. -Let's have a snoop.
(energetic, tense music playing)
We call this "Little Alexandria."
-Not so little. (chuckles) -So many jewels.
Yeah.
Mondino de Liuzzi's "Anatomia," the first edition.
-Oh. -My personal favorite.
-Oh, of course. You were a, uh-- -Physician.
-Yes. That's right. -Yes.
It was a hotel once, you know?
-I'm sorry, what was? -Here.
-Ah. -It was a hotel. The Metropole,
-it was called, before I requisitioned. -Mm. Yeah.
Greta Garbo stayed here once.
-I'm supposed to tell the Americans. -Ah.
-Is she still known? -Oh, uh, oh, definitely.
Oh, that's a relief.
-(door slams, locks) -We'll show you the music room next.
-Sorry, is my guy-- Is he-- -Elena: Oh, God, yes.
You know, it is so confusing, isn't it?
Don't worry, he'll catch up. You alright?
Um, yes, of course. I just think that maybe we should--
Elena: Do you like music?
Um, I do. Yes, I like music.
Good, you'll like the music room, my favorite.
Wait until you see this.
Uh, oh, quick call. Yeah, I'll-I'll rejoin.
Sorry! Are you--
(Judith chuckles nervously)
Um, what--
You know what? I think I'd rather just...
rejoin her, if that's--
There's no way out through that door.
(jiggling handle)
Okay.
-Okay, well, do any of these-- -No.
Okay.
Alright.
-Alright. -Listen to me.
Okay.
Listen to me!
Fuck.
Um, you know what? I-I think, um,
-I just need to find my-- -Are you scared or what?
No, no.
(jiggling handle)
(Judith takes deep breath)
How does it feel to not be in control?
Please.
You will never be in control of this place ever again, you hear me?
(tense music playing)
-(gasps) -(unlocks door)
(fast-paced, tense music playing)
Judith: Tell them we're going straight to the airport.
We're not stopping at the hotel.
-Okay? -Emil Bartos: All good?
Judith: No, Emil, not fucking all good.
(both sigh)
(engine starts)
Don't worry. I'll come back and talk to her.
Okay!
We can go now.
-That felt-- -Yes.
-You heard me, didn't you? -Yes.
-In your head? -I did.
-I told you to do it. -I heard you.
What happens now?
What would you like to happen?
I want more.
If you want more, you should have more,
but then you have to flush it all out.
-Yes. -Yes, the poison.
-I'll flush it all out. -The whole gut.
-Yes, all of it. -Everyone that ever hurt us.
Starting with that fat fuck Bartos.
We shove their gold down their throat until they choke.
-We can really do it, can't we? -Yes, we have to.
We have to make it right.
♪♪
(deep breath)
Alright, darling?
Yes, I am.
You've had a long day.
Poor Lenny. You must be exhausted.
Oh, do fuck off with that.
-Sorry? -Here's what's going to happen.
Mm.
(sighs)
I'm going to fuck you now.
-Really? -Yes.
Oh, yes.
-Oh, yes. -Don't do anything. I'll do it all.
-Okay, yes. -(grunts) Off. Okay.
(electronic toy beeping)
Is that a new toy you've got there?
Oskar?
Have you got a new game?
(toy continues)
Hm?
-Oskar. -(buzzer sounds)
Alright, come on. I'm late. Here.
-I don't want one. -You do want one.
-Here. -I don't want one.
-I'm bored of them. -You have to have one.
(sighs) Fine.
There ya go.
And if you're not feelin' well,
you're gonna tell me, alright?
Oskar, look at me.
(buzzer sounds)
Yeah... (mumbling).
Thank you, Agnes. Where's our baby?
Is he, uh, playing with his new toy?
-Yes, Madam. -Good.
I thought he deserved a little treat.
I'll let you spoil him next time.
You squeezed him out after all.
Thank you, Madam.
You know, I'd have squeezed out my own
if the doctors would've let me, but...
with my posterior cervix and all that,
you know, just, it's probably too late for me now.
Mr. Bartos is on his way, Madam.
Oh, good.
-(tense music playing) -Mm.
♪♪
Huh.
♪♪
(cameras clicking)
Please sit, Mr. Bartos.
Oh, certainly.
-Uh, what is, uh-- -Elena: Sit, please.
♪♪
Now, we'd like to have a chat... about the problem.
Emil: Right.
The problem, Madam Chancellor.
Yes, the problem.
Well, you know what the problem is, so...
tell us about the problem.
Um, well, I suppose you'll have to specify slightly.
Elena: Don't dissemble for the lens, sir.
That won't work here.
(scoffs) I'm not your shareholders.
I'm not your American clients. I am not your business partner.
I am the ghost of your conscience.
Do you think we enjoy this embarrassing position
-you've put us in? -Madam Chancellor--
Elena: Now, you are the wealthiest man in this country, yeah?
Is that correct? Mm-hmm?
And yet I see-- Oh, what do I see?
Unpaid salaries at three cobalt mines,
failure to pay administrative fines,
reports of bribes to gain state licenses.
No, don't, don't, don't, don't look at them.
No, this is just you and me having a little chat.
-Yeah? -(scoffs) Sorry.
-Um, I'm-I'm not aware of any-- -Elena: Of any what?
You're not aware of what's happening in your own business?
No, yes, of course, I'm aware of--
Sorry, where are you getting these figures?
Well, it's right here. I'm reading it.
Would you like to see?
We have no room in our walls for termites, no room at all.
Now, the bad actors in your company will be imprisoned.
But you, sir, are almost more troubling,
for this all happened right under your nose,
and yet, you did nothing to stop it.
So, what should we do with you?
-Again, I would have to examine-- -So, you won't apologize?
Well, of course. Yes.
I do apologize to you, Madam Chancellor.
Not to me, you hog!
Apologize to my people.
Oh, yes, I am sorry, sorry to them...
-too, but truly-- -Elena: Now, why don't you tell them
what you told me when last we met?
-How do you mean? -Elena: At the sugar beet festival.
Outside the conservatory.
The first sugar beet of the season.
-Hm? -I don't recall.
(chuckles) You do.
-Yes, you do. Oh, you recall quite well. -(Emil chuckles)
(tense music playing)
You told me to bend my knee to the U.S.
To grease their empire, and just keep rolling on forever into hell.
-Now, isn't that right? -No. No, that was--
that was not meant to be construed as such.
-Do you think I'm deaf? -Emil: No.
Again, I can only say that I am deeply sorry.
You let the American cancer feed on your marrow.
You made millions of people suffer for your greed.
(slams dossier shut)
Shame on you, sir.
(people murmuring)
Oh, no, no. No, you will stay here,
and you will clean the mess you have made.
♪♪
Starting with these chairs.
-(murmuring) -(cameras clicking)
Good Lord. Poor Emil.
Singer: Yes, well, spare a thought for the 16-year-old
Latvian who has to blow him tonight.
If Elena's coming after Bartos, then--
Then she'll come after all of us.
The entire holding company.
It's a fucking bear hunt.
I don't know. Could it just be theater?
-You think it's real? -Ask the billionaire stacking chairs.
Barman, give us some privacy, please.
-And turn the TV off first. -Uh, good afternoon, sir.
Oh, an enchanting fucking afternoon to you, too.
An unfortunate spectacle,
although I take Madam's point.
The man did need a telling.
-Mr. Laskin, please. -Straight away.
I've compiled an edit of the pertinent viscera.
-Anything of interest? -Oh, I think you'll find yourself quite engrossed.
Herbert (in video): Yes, Elena. (grunts)
Yeah, tell me... huh?
(grunting)
-(Herbert choking) -I hear you.
Yes.
(grunting)
(tense music playing)
Tell me everything you want, I'll do it.
-(pauses video) -That...
-is shocking. -It's disgraceful.
There's quite a bit more in this genre.
This is the best you've got?
A little chokey-tuggy in the boudoir?
But, sir, as example of his character,
of his deportment.
But it won't move Elena.
You've gone about this all wrong.
Well how would you suggest we go about it?
What are we really discussing here, huh?
Her safety, yes, and her happiness.
Now, the truth is, my wife has been happier since he turned up.
Uh, pleasantly invigorated, actually.
-In the sense of? -Eh--
Wha-- Oh, never mind. I don't want to know.
What did we do when she proposed the remodel, hm?
Or the Charlemagne fixation?
Or even last summer, the business with the...
comment il s'appelait l'autre con-la gne-gne-gne?
-Sebastian. -Sebastian.
We all know what Elena likes is a good story.
Until the drive goes, and then--
-She moves on. -She moves on.
The sooner you accelerate his rise...
the sooner he'll fall out of favor.
Find a good story.
A good story.
(tense, determined music playing)
(thunder rumbles, cracks)
♪♪
Elena: Yes, an initiative of some kind.
You know, public works, grants, something like that.
In Westgate, they would say,
"You may build it as tall as you like,
but you build it from our earth."
I like that. That's very good.
What is it? Oh, yes. (scoffs)
My love, would you give us a moment?
Sure. (clears throat)
So, I'm meant to believe this is important.
-It is, Madam. -Oh, yes, it is.
-I heard Mr. Laskin, Mr. Schiff. -Sorry, Madam.
Well, I don't like to be kept outside of things.
We apologize, ma'am, but we wanted to be sure of what we have here.
Sit.
(Elena sighs)
Madam...
we have some startling information
regarding Corporal Zubak.
In the course of the corporal's background check,
I ordered bloodwork, genetics.
The analysis of which we have finally concluded.
There is a story we've all been told,
a legend of Central Europe.
The story of three brothers.
One went East to Russia, one North to Poland,
and one settled the South.
-Y-You've heard this story, Madam? -I have.
And of course, in our country, we believe there was a fourth brother
who went West and settled a new homeland.
One of our great national myths.
But researchers at the state university
have examined the corporal's genetic evidence.
And it is their contention, Madam, that this is no myth.
They contend Herbert Zubak himself
may share a direct chromosomal link
with the first settler of our soil.
The Foundling.
-Singer: The Foundling, ma'am. -Schiff: The Foundling.
Now, Madam, I am no geneticist
and cannot confirm the veracity of this.
Uh, we are none of us, uh, geneticists, Madam.
But I'm inclined to defer to the expert testimony
of our nation's top experts in the field.
Mr. Schiff and I incline similarly.
And there is data to support this?
-Oh, in abundance, Madam. -Well, I shall have to see this data, please.
Indeed, we were hoping to consult your medical expertise
as a means of independent verification.
Singer: But if, in fact, you can verify the data,
we think this discovery might be of giant historical import.
Laskin: You may recall our research last year
establishing a genetic link
between yourself and Charlemagne.
Oh, yes. I was not able to verify with
absolute certainty, but--
But it fell within an acceptable range of probability.
Well, yes. I-I thought so, yes.
Ma'am...
the blood of Charlemagne
and the blood of the Foundling?
Now, that is a union of destiny for all of Middle Europe.
Well, that's an interesting hypothesis to test.
Oh, it's a stunning feat of historiography, ma'am.
And if I might add, there were some in this palace
-who doubted the Corporal. -Laskin: Mm.
But we three, we are more than happy today
to have proved them wrong.
-Thank you, gentlemen. -Laskin: Certainly, Madam.
You've given us a lot to think about.
(light, curious music playing)
My loves...
as children, we were told our ancestors were mongrels,
mules of the Danube,
mere footnotes of European history.
But this was a lie.
I have conducted new research
proving that our blood proceeds directly from the veins
of the Foundling himself.
The Foundling was no myth.
Indeed, one of his actual genetic descendants
walks among us.
Yeah, fine.
Elena: And with his guidance,
we shall reclaim our destiny
as the once and future kings
of our beloved corner of Europe.
(grand, dramatic music playing)
(slow, dramatic music playing)
♪♪