- What's wrong with him? - Nothing.
Just gave him something to calm him down.
But when it wears off, he's not dangerous, is he?
- That's your problem now. - Fuck.
All right, bring him in.
Come on.
She's about to give her speech.
What's your name again, Corporal?
Zubak.
Hard vowels. Regurgitative, that.
What's your Christian name?
- Herbert. - Herbert?
"Herbert Zubak," just trips off the tongue.
Pardon the mess.
Fuckin' builders.
Suppose I could just shoot them all
if you have any tips.
Hello, my dear.
Don't worry about the ammonia smell.
They're sanitizing for the third time in as many months.
What the fuck you think this is? An open house?
Go and find your team downstairs.
The tall, scary woman is Susan Goin, Minister of Finance.
The short, furry man is Dr. Kershaw
the Chancellor's personal physician.
Put his jacket on.
Christ, he's a plow horse.
This one won't last a week.
Okay, sit.
All right.
Hello in there.
Are you with us?
I should tell you I vehemently opposed your selection.
You and your trigger finger made quite a fucking mess for us.
But the Chancellor insisted, so...
here you are.
And he's signed everything, has he, Agnes?
- Yeah, yeah, earlier. - Good. Good!
So, where to begin?
I suppose...
moisture, yes?
- Sorry? - Can you listen, please?
How much do you know?
Sorry, are you hearing me?
I only know I'm reassigned.
Right. Fuck.
Well, the situation is, we have a problem.
- Namely, spores. - Spores.
- Spores? - Stachybotrys atra.
- Mycotoxins. - Quite dangerous allergens.
The Chancellor spotted them.
She was a physician herself once, remember?
- But it's a very serious concern. - Very much so.
But we're containing the problem, of course.
Yes. Yeah. Well, no...
We're working on containing the problem as such.
Hence the renovation of the Palace.
Tearing out the guts
scraping it clean, so on.
But you understand the gravity of the problem, Corporal Zubak, yes?
And you comprehend that the problem is real
for the Chancellor?
She's in danger?
Well, quite great danger, yes.
But, no, we're sorting it.
So you'll have a chat with the Chancellor, yes?
- Ready? - Now?
Now, yes.
Good. Come on, then.
Never breathe in her direction.
Stay calm.
Don't vomit.
Enter.
Corporal Zubak, Madam Chancellor.
Yes. Thank you, Susan.
Sorry for all the security measures.
Are you all right?
Yes, Chief.
Are you sure?
They can be so overcautious on my behalf.
And don't worry about these people.
They're just setting up.
So you're from Westgate, I hear.
- Yes, Chief. - Land of the sugar beet.
Stunning place.
Not so much, Chief.
And your parents?
They are dead.
Mine too. Leave us.
Sit.
Now, I don't wish to be indelicate
but do you know why I selected you for this job?
- No, Chief. - I wanted a Site Five boy.
No, no, don't be ashamed.
They behaved like animals, those protesters.
You soldiers just reacted.
I was right to send you boys down that mine
in spite of what my critics say.
Not nice what they're calling you.
"Butchers of Site Five."
But it's all right. I know the truth.
There's a good man in there who deserves love.
Thank you, Chief.
D'you know it's the oddest thing?
I feel like we've met before.
A déjà vu thing or something.
Or like we met in a dream.
Have we?
I don't think so, Chief.
So, they've explained the job, then?
No, Chief.
Well, fine.
Better they haven't.
Trust me, the so-called experts know less
than the common shits like us.
Up. Right.
This is a hygrometer.
It measures humidity in the air.
It helps you to tell me if there's mold nearby.
We'll need you to follow me everywhere
and take measurements, do you understand?
- Yes, I think so, Chief. - Good.
I'd say we're just about meant for each other
wouldn't you?
Let's have you leave now.
Thank you.
Now, Corporal...
a graceful mind.
You must strive to have a graceful mind.
Yes, I will try, Chief. Thank you.
Yeah.
Good. That should be all then.
Oh, no... We don't do that.
In fact, you must quite strongly dissuade anyone
from hand contact with the Chancellor.
Do you understand?
This is very important.
Well, lucky fucking break, Butcher.
Let's go.
They say cleansin' the Palace may take years.
God help us.
Well, here we are.
Your new home.
You'll start first thing in the morning.
Tonight, you'll memorize the floor plan
and a schedule for tomorrow.
I'll have someone get your things.
Have you got things?
Hey, you.
I've cared for this slag heap my whole life
so don't go soilin' it.
And invest in some moisturizer
'cause the dehumidifiers turn your skin to a mummy's asshole.
Oh, my god.
Seven years ago tomorrow
we defeated Chancellor Edward Keplinger
and his bandit radicals
in a free and fair election.
It is this victory that we celebrate.
When I became your Chancellor
I did so with a heavy heart.
I knew the hard work of smashing the failed state
would devour my time
and would prevent me from being next to you
with your hand in mine.
But just know
you fill me with all the love I'll ever need.
And so, I bless you all.
And I bless our love, always.
- Hello? - Get up.
You have 20 minutes.
Happy Victory Day, Butcher.
Happy Victory Day, Herbie.
Let's go.
- Did you get the floor plan down? - I think so, yes.
She hates doubt.
Do you need a mop, you prick?
Go and find your section crew.
Breathing. If she passes ya, hold it in.
If she talks to you, cover your mouth.
Hit your mints often.
If she smells mold
tell her you smell it too.
How'd she do?
She said the sausage looked like a baboon's cock.
Mind if the cooks eat it?
Fine, yeah. Don't let the guards see.
What's her mood?
Five out of ten.
With a ten being good?
Does it matter if it's five?
Come and stand against this wall.
Come on.
Hey, it's dead simple.
You walk with her and you measure the relative humidity.
What does this number mean?
It means, "Don't ask questions and look sharp
or you'll end up like the last one."
Open the door and walk in front of me.
- How are we? - Very good, Chief.
No, my dear. How's our moisture?
It's 31%.
Glasshouse first with Mr. Laskin
Head of Security Service.
Today, you'll encounter a soup tureen of worms
known as the bureaucracy.
Prepare yourself.
Happy Victory Day, Madam.
It's 41%.
Here's our intelligence on this glorious morning.
My sources in the planning office suspect
Finance Minister Goin's patience is running thin
waiting for you to finalize the cobalt partnership with the US.
Should you choose to proceed with the deal
I'm told the Americans may require additional reassurance
due to the Site Five unseemliness.
On Palace intel, then.
Some chatter downstairs about your appetite.
And... Oh, a reminder.
Your husband's sitting with Vogue today.
I assume we should surveil?
Madam.
- Feeling better today? - Yes, Chief.
Your mind is more graceful?
I think so, yes.
I wonder, where were we last night?
I'm sorry?
That place we met, where was it?
Last night?
Yes, my love.
Our dream.
Don't you remember?
Sugar beets.
Yes, that's right.
Sugar beets.
Lovely, weren't they?
She's on her way up.
Dress?
Green.
Had to be green, didn't it?
Are you scared of a fabric dye?
You really are a mewling vulva, Mr. Schiff.
Well, what do you expect?
She hasn't so much as glanced at me in months.
Well, consider yourself fortunate.
The right hand gets the smack.
You notice how she's cooling on her favorite
Our Lady of the Shrinking GDP?
Jealousy is bred in self-doubt, Mr. Singer.
It's like a dog using a calculator.
Well, see her in, Butcher.
Mints, everyone. Short breaths.
Mouths closed.
Happy Victory Day, Madam.
Happy Victory Day, Ma'am.
Happy Victory Day, Madam.
Let's get on with it, please, yes?
These need to be briefer, these briefings.
Oh, ravishing.
I... I mean, the flowers are...
ravishing.
Right. Yes. So, the Texans.
- BioCon. - Yes.
Richard Kaiser, the CEO
will be at your table tonight with his wife.
And as you know
it would be ideal if we could move towards closing the cobalt deal.
You think I'm dragging my heels.
Is that it, Susan?
No, no, Madam. No, of course not.
Well, you do think it. Say it plainly.
Well, as you know, Madam, we are in dire need of investment
and well...
Well, I needn't remind you
that you once fully endorsed this deal.
Well, perhaps my thinking's changed, hm?
Is that all right with you?
It doesn't tread on your little tootsies, does it?
No, but with our economic indices slowing
we do need to find some other...
It's the fucking optics.
Like I'm a fucking kept woman.
Granting cobalt mining rights to a foreign power.
I look fucking weak.
I agree, Ma'am.
We've always messaged greater national self-sufficiency
and letting America use our resources for their Teslas and laptops
well, it's hardly that, now is it?
With respect to Mr. Singer's comms expertise
the people want growth.
And you know what the people want, do you, Susan?
You can hear them grunting from your country house?
Madam, set aside the facts and figures.
The real issue is the sooner we close this deal
the sooner we can truly invest in our top priorities.
Like making this palace safe
making the air around you safe
making you safe.
Yes.
Well...
let's see what happens.
In front.
Front, front, in front of me now.
Not too close. Keep your distance.
Be careful in here.
Make sure he keeps his paws to himself.
Moisture.
21%.
Here.
Trite flowers for Victory Day.
Look, Daddy
I'm not going to feel foolish for having a celebration
if that's what you're thinking.
I know you always hated parties, but I don't
so... fine.
And every girl likes an excuse to dress up.
They love it out there.
Yes, they love me
much more than they ever loved you.
Yeah. Perhaps that's why I won the Chancellorship
and you never came near it.
Ever thought of that?
Some silly old husk.
You've got spots now.
That's new.
Leopard changing its spots.
Get it? Very funny.
Hilarious. Right.
Is that it? Are we done? Yes?
Good.
Happy, happy.
One more deep breath, please.
Oh, no, dear.
It's worse this week.
Humidity's spiking again. I knew it.
- Try and relax, Madam. - No, I knew it. I knew it.
I can't relax, can I? When there's mold everywhere.
Madam, as you are aware, with the AAT deficiency
that you've inherited from your father
you are at high risk of lung disease.
But I can assure you, we are doing everything in...
Not enough.
I can still smell rotten air in every fucking room!
- My pills, my pills! - Later.
Before the banquet.
Oxygen at 90%, under pressure.
Crank it up!
We love the magazine, of course
and we love America.
Always been a very strong bond there.
Oh, absolutely.
I'm French myself
although my home is wherever Elena is.
But we're always happy to partner with our NATO friends
who share our love of freedom.
Right, the subject of freedom?
By all means.
Amnesty International says your wife's government conducts
"intensive physical and electronic surveillance
of private citizens."
Sounds a bit chewy for a fashion mag, huh?
No, no. It's true.
We do take very seriously the spread of disinformation.
- So in that sense. - Right
- but in terms of the... - But surveillance?
No. God, no.
But you admit there is some close observation.
As there is in your country.
But no.
True democracy doesn't happen overnight.
And we are closer now than we've ever been.
And as for the reports of unrest
- Oh, yes. - In the... in the mines?
The Site Five trouble.
That was an isolated incident.
A single cobalt mine where things got a little peppery.
But if I may
I would like to steer us back
to my national poetry NGO
which with...
You're making them fight, sweetheart?
- Yes. - Good.
Enter.
The entrée for the Victory dinner, Ma'am.
We're done, thank you.
No... No salmon.
No, salmon's meek. No.
No, we need robust food.
Meat, no game.
Lamb. Yeah, something.
Oh, you'll figure it out. Oskar, stop doing that.
Go along with your mother now, angel
and take your epilepsy pills.
How do I look?
Perfect.
Another banquet.
God, it's exhausting.
Wearing my face for these people
smiling at their lies
slurping on consommé.
I'd like to pour it on their fucking skulls.
Me too, Chief.
You'd like that, would you?
Very much, Chief.
Well, you'll stick with me tonight, yeah?
Keep the humidity in check
and their filthy air away from me, yes?
I will do everything you want.
Good.
You're a good man.
Good boy.
Knock it off.
You did put dehumidifiers under all these tables, didn't you?
Yes, Mein Führer.
House call later, once the boy's asleep?
Not tonight, doc.
There's too much bloody clean-up.
- As you like it, puss. - Stop calling me that.
Hey.
When she arrives
give her the number, discreetly.
And if she has a crisis
escort her to that hallway there.
There'll be fresh oxygen machines waiting
but be fucking discreet.
Okay.
Mr. Kaiser, Emil's our country's top businessman.
You can trust him.
Our cobalt pit infrastructure
will soon be near top industry standards.
And would Mr. Bartos call the massacre at Site Five
"top industry standards"?
Look, that was all overblown.
- Just some bad apples. - Twelve deaths?
Can we just improve the visuals, please?
Can we not have the White House reading about murdered pit diggers
in The Washington Post?
Of course.
So, go on, then.
- Why did you do it? - What?
There's no use hiding it from me.
I'll find it out soon enough.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Well, some say
the miners at Site Five weren't rioting at all, you know?
They were fed up with the poisoned air and the dirty water
so they raised their voices.
And you Army boys just panicked and opened fire.
I wonder, though.
Did you panic
or did you enjoy it?
My victorious friends
cast your minds back seven years ago
to the rot in our nation's heart.
We were a broken people.
Of course, we know who broke us.
The former Chancellor, Edward Keplinger.
The Rat
and his crony cabal of neo-Marxist thieves.
He made us feel hopeless.
That was until we saw her face.
The young doctor from Rinnburg with the brilliant eyes.
She took the tiny party her father founded
and transformed it into a monster.
She trounced Keplinger!
Ran him off to his country home
where he licks his wounds still.
So, join me. All.
Our new American friends, too.
A toast to Elena Vernham.
To the Chancellor!
If you leave me now
You'll take away The biggest part of me
Ooh, no, baby, please don't go
Wonderful to see you all looking so magnificent.
If you leave me now
You'll take away
the very heart of me.
You will. I'll be heartbroken.
Ooh, no, baby, please don't go
No! I just want you to stay.
And so does Nicky, my husband.
Nicholas Vernham, everybody.
A love like ours
Is love that's hard to find
How could we let it slip away?
How could we ever?
You're so precious to me.
We've come too far To leave it all behind
We have. We must carry on forever.
How could we end it all this way?
When tomorrow comes
and we'll both regret
The things we said today
Don't you leave me now.
Ladies and gentlemen, thank you.
Oh, thank you so much!
Oh, do look. That's sweet.
Oh, Nicky, look. Darling, they're standing up.
Oh, god, I think I'm going to cry.
- Goodness. - That was lovely.
Is that all right?
- Honestly, are you sure? - Yes, honey.
Now, come on, deep breaths.
- Wonderful, Madam. - Oh, thank you, thank you, Susan.
Thank you. How wonderful.
Hello, thank you.
- My goodness, Mr. Kaiser. - Mrs. Kaiser.
- Pleasure. - No, no touching, sir.
Excuse me. Excuse me. Thanks.
Now... Thank you.
Such a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Kaiser.
And your darling wife, Mrs. Kaiser.
- Hello. - Charmed.
- Please, let's sit. We must. - It's about 40% humidity.
That will be all. Thank you so much.
- Humidity? - No.
It's just a stupid joke, really.
Should we have brought raincoats?
No.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
My wife and I don't eat meat, only fish.
Oh, please forgive our staff's mistake.
How did you and the Chancellor meet?
We met in medical school in Paris.
I had a wife and a baby at the time
but Elena is very persuasive.
I can imagine.
Alas, she went home to pursue politics
so I went back to my wife and kid.
And then
she thought that marriage would help her campaign
so she asked me to propose
which I did.
And I left my family in Paris for good
and haven't seen them since.
And thus, here we are, happily ever after.
Well, we do love Paris.
Will you excuse me for a moment, please?
May I speak with you?
Go here, please. Go, go there.
Go on. Go on. That's it. Go on in there.
Look at me, please.
You happy now? Yes, are you?
They think I'm a lunatic now.
You've handed them all the leverage.
D'you know I am out there by myself
hustling, providing for my country
and you've made me look ridiculous
in front of the Americans.
I am not ridiculous.
I am very much not ridiculous
- you stupid cunt. - I'm sorry.
Next time
turn your gun on yourself.
Stick it in your mouth
you graceless fucking cow.
So...
we should talk.
- But let's eat first, I think. - Oh, no. Sure.
I talked to a few of your folks earlier, you know...
Well, you're not talking to my folks now, are you?
You're talking to me.
And I heard you were playing hardball
which is fine.
But what are you concerned about, hm?
Bit of worker unrest?
Some wonky machinery, hm?
It's marginalia.
Look at what we are.
We are a young, Central European republic
ready to embrace a modern corporate governance.
We're ready to grow, with you.
Here's the important part.
We love America.
We love our friendship.
And we'd love nothing more than to tighten those bonds.
We have the cobalt.
You pay for the pits and the refineries.
It's a perfect partnership.
Or you can hold China's cock
while they piss all over your shoes
and hold you hostage to their corrupt supply lines.
All right, then.
30% stake in mining rights as agreed.
Good. Let's do that then.
But I would like your assurance of our ability
to get to 51.
- 51%. - Which would, of course, be...
de rigueur in a deal structure like this
to advance to a majority stake.
Well, that's how it's always done, don't worry.
Sorry, just to be clear
so if I wanted then to do something with our cobalt
I'd have to ask your permission?
It won't be a problem.
We'll be more than fair.
It's at 31.
Not him.
Wait here.
Agnes managed to keep you whole.
I would've sent the zoo some fresh lion food.
So, you're no longer the Chancellor's personal water diviner.
You are now the night moisture sentry for the residence floor.
- Do you know what that means? - No.
It means that you wave your fucking gizmo around these halls
from midnight to 6.00am
and you never see the Chancellor's face again.
Enjoy it, Butcher.
I was trying to help.
Like you helped at Site Five.
Night sentry.
Hold the fort.
Just kill yourself.
Westgate trash.
Just kill yourself!
Kill... kill yourself!
Useless beef.
Just kill yourself. Kill yourself!
Fuck... Fuck!
No.
It's all right.
It's... it's all right.
Yes, I know.
I know you're scared.
We can both be scared, hm?
Yes, we'll...
we'll get through this together.
- What's going... - We come from the same place
you and I
and that's why we'll be thick as thieves, my love.
Chief!
Your brothers tortured us!
Oh, you two are dead!
- Dead... Dead! - (Foreign language)
Let's go now!
Oh, my god!
- I breathed him... I breathed him! - I'm really sorry.
Out... out!
I breathed him!
In the chair.
- I breathed him! Oh, my god! - All right, hon, give me your hands.
Give me your hands.
Please! Please help me! Get out! Out!
Help me! Help me! Help. Help me.
Give your arm. Give your arm.
What are you doing here?
They needed more scrubby hands for the great microbe hunt.
- Miss me, puss? - Stop calling me that.
What are people hearing outside?
Only what the state news tells them.
"The Chancellor is enjoying
a well-deserved holiday in the mountains."
The mountains of fucking madness.
Two weeks without a public appearance.
People must know something's up.
- How's the boy? - Yeah, he's fine, yeah.
Keeps asking where "she" is.
Where is the old girl?
Lord knows. Nobody's seen her except...
This will help your body to fight.
It's sunflower, like my mother used to make.
It hates poison.
Sir?
Yeah, I... I'd like to see her.
Is she expecting you?
I'm her husband.
Is she expecting you?
One expects their husband to enter a room.
It's all right, my love.
- My love. - Hello, Nicky.
I've missed you, Lenny.
Minister Goin and Dr. Kershaw
wanted to share a plan for the short term.
Perhaps it wouldn't hurt to chat?
He's got spots now.
Sorry, dear?
More spots. Have you seen?
Who has, my love?
Him, downstairs.
- On his face. - But it...
It's been a year now, my love.
I... I'm sure it's normal.
No.
That's what cosmetics are for.
I should not have to spot the spots.
Lenny, do you suppose...
maybe it's time to let him go?
Stop...
Stop it.
I have. Just...
stop that.
Tell them I'll meet them at noon.
Madam Chancellor, you look well
and we hope you're recuperating briskly.
It's been quite a shock.
- Very much so. - Terrible, terrible few weeks.
What happened was unthinkable.
A fluke, some lunatic.
A former cobalt miner turned builder, we've learned.
Very ill in the head.
But every measure is being taken to ensure
that nothing of this nature ever happens again.
Absolutely not. Never again.
Madam
there's no use dancing around it.
The Palace, at present, is simply unfit for your habitation.
The data is incontrovertible.
Here's the bind.
We can't risk further security breaches
and so the renovation has to be put on hold.
No question.
Which means, of course...
The toxicity you detected in the walls would remain.
You'd be trapped in a petri dish.
Meaning a relocation of sorts to the countryside
pending your approval.
Of course, while you recuperate
certain government functions would still need to operate here.
And so, myself and a select staff
would remain in the capital to oversee those functions.
Vital tasks only, such as finishing the cobalt deal.
Madam
we weren't able to save your father from his failing lungs
but it's not too late to save you.
Thank you both.
You may go.
Rest well, Madam.
Corporal, sit.
No.
Come here. Sit beside me.
Do you know why you're here?
No.
You're here because you are nobody
do you understand?
I don't mean that as an insult. I only mean it as a fact.
You are not anybody.
And that means I can trust you, yes?
Yes, Chief.
Now, you are the only one
who can tell me what the nobodies want.
Look at me.
You love me, don't you?
- Yes. - Can you say it?
I love you.
Yes.
Now if you love me
tell me honestly
what would you like to happen next?
Tell me.
You were in my dream last night
and I was in yours.
And you told me to crush them
anyone who makes you weak.
They've cut our balls off, Chief.
And now they are laughing at us
because you dance for foreign cash
like a sick fucking bear at the circus.
And that's what everybody's saying out there.
You don't hear it, but that's what they are saying, trust me.
America treats us as if we are their fucking colony.
So, what do they do?
They rain piss on us all day.
They want you to fail.
And so does your finance bitch.
And so does your fat pig doctor telling you that you are sick.
You are sick? That's bullshit!
Something, yes, it's true.
Something in this building is killing you
but it's not this shit.
It's not this shit.
It's them!
They want you... Look at me.
They want you crippled
because you have something they will never, ever have.
A fucking dream.
I'd love to smash their fucking faces forever.
A graceful mind.
One, two, three, four. I declare a thumb war.
Fight...
No... That's a tactic!
That was a tactic!
Nicky, did you see that? Let's try again.
Look me in the eye. I'm about to win.
One, two, three, four. I declare a thumb war.
Fight. Fight! Got you!
Okay, best of three.
One, two, three, four.
Fight...
No, no. You are terrible!
My friends
a few weeks ago, one of my government's top ministers
along with key members of my household retinue
conspired with a foreign-backed fifth column
to assassinate me while I slept.
Sir, get off me! Get off me!
For the past year
these individuals have weakened our economy
our government
and even my immune system
aided by meddling foreign regimes.
Which is why today
I am issuing an executive order
to repay our debts
turn away American investors
and rid this country of its sick dependence
on NATO's teat.
My husband and I
have been deeply touched by the outpouring
of love and support we've seen across the nation this week.
This is the true spirit of our people.
You are the beating heart.
You are the soul of everything.
You are the well from which I draw strength
to vanquish our enemies.
I will not let you be sucked
into the decadence and toxicity of America
and its surrogates around the globe.
For years, we have suffered
so they could build the global order in their image.
They've provided material aid to corrupt regimes abroad.
They committed and abetted mass murder
and they've waged their crony capitalist war
in every corner of the planet.
They have told the rest of us
"Play ball."
"Sit up straight"
"do as we tell you, and pay the toll."
It's time to say enough.
We will no longer be a party to their legacy of brutality.
We will no longer suffer for their greed.
It is time to show America and the world
precisely what we are worth.
I bless you all.
And I bless our love, always.