1 00:00:08,625 --> 00:00:12,250 ‎NETFLIX 剧集 2 00:00:15,083 --> 00:00:16,041 ‎快跑! 3 00:00:19,208 --> 00:00:21,166 ‎看吧?都解决了 4 00:00:24,791 --> 00:00:26,916 ‎我也想充当一个字母! 5 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:33,916 ‎(剧名:要死还是要飞) 6 00:00:37,625 --> 00:00:39,416 ‎好的!加油! 7 00:00:39,500 --> 00:00:43,708 ‎98 99 100 8 00:00:43,791 --> 00:00:45,208 ‎好了 完成 9 00:00:46,791 --> 00:00:49,875 ‎嗨 你大概在想 ‎我是怎么变成现在这副样子的 10 00:00:49,958 --> 00:00:52,083 ‎一切都要从作业说起 11 00:00:54,416 --> 00:00:56,791 ‎我的作业是我自身的延伸 12 00:00:56,875 --> 00:01:00,000 ‎我的作业是我自身的延伸 13 00:01:01,166 --> 00:01:02,166 ‎我的作业是我… 14 00:01:02,250 --> 00:01:03,750 ‎上乘的花岗岩 石英 15 00:01:04,833 --> 00:01:08,750 ‎老爸!别打扰我们!我们在冥想 16 00:01:08,833 --> 00:01:10,083 ‎抱歉 17 00:01:14,458 --> 00:01:16,916 ‎问题只是反过来的答案 18 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:18,083 ‎问题只是… 19 00:01:18,166 --> 00:01:21,416 ‎孩子们 要吃坚果吗? ‎从不完美食品超市定期订购的 20 00:01:21,500 --> 00:01:23,833 ‎妈!我们正在尝试做作业 21 00:01:23,916 --> 00:01:24,875 ‎是吗? 22 00:01:24,958 --> 00:01:28,041 ‎因为在我看来 ‎你们不过是在拖延时间 23 00:01:29,041 --> 00:01:30,041 ‎说话注意点! 24 00:01:32,708 --> 00:01:38,416 ‎文学的发明不是为了折磨我! 25 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:41,083 ‎文学的… 26 00:01:42,166 --> 00:01:44,833 ‎咻! 27 00:01:49,041 --> 00:01:50,041 ‎我想我打死它了 28 00:01:51,041 --> 00:01:52,708 ‎你直接杀死那家伙了! 29 00:01:52,791 --> 00:01:55,541 ‎因为它打扰了 ‎我们的做作业心理建设仪式 30 00:01:55,625 --> 00:01:57,875 ‎打扰是人类社会的祸根 31 00:01:57,958 --> 00:02:01,041 ‎我们作为一个物种 ‎还有很多没有完成的伟大事业 32 00:02:01,125 --> 00:02:02,833 ‎之所以还没有完成 33 00:02:02,916 --> 00:02:05,083 ‎就是因为正当有人要成功时 34 00:02:05,166 --> 00:02:06,541 ‎就会被别人打扰 35 00:02:06,625 --> 00:02:10,000 ‎打扰是我们还没发明出 ‎喷气背包的原因 麦克斯 喷气背包! 36 00:02:10,083 --> 00:02:12,958 ‎但如果它有家人呢? 37 00:02:13,041 --> 00:02:15,125 ‎那只苍蝇在我的地盘上 38 00:02:15,208 --> 00:02:17,416 ‎我不会去大自然里乱杀昆虫 39 00:02:17,500 --> 00:02:19,083 ‎因为那是它们的地盘 40 00:02:19,166 --> 00:02:21,250 ‎但一旦虫子进了我家 41 00:02:21,333 --> 00:02:22,541 ‎我就会采取行动 42 00:02:22,625 --> 00:02:25,500 ‎那如果现在有一只螳螂 ‎从这扇门里走进来… 43 00:02:25,583 --> 00:02:27,708 ‎那它只能自求多福了! 44 00:02:27,791 --> 00:02:29,625 ‎换句话说 如果在大自然里 45 00:02:29,708 --> 00:02:32,208 ‎那只螳螂完全有权消灭我 46 00:02:32,916 --> 00:02:34,458 ‎我倒是从没这样想过 47 00:02:35,083 --> 00:02:37,916 ‎好吧 起码不会有什么严重后果 48 00:02:38,541 --> 00:02:40,291 ‎(迪特学校) 49 00:02:40,375 --> 00:02:43,041 ‎真厉害啊 昨晚作业都做完了 50 00:02:43,125 --> 00:02:47,250 ‎是啊 拍了那么多遍苍蝇 ‎我的手腕还在疼呢 51 00:02:53,541 --> 00:02:56,666 ‎蝇蝇老师 发生什么事了? 52 00:02:56,750 --> 00:02:59,083 ‎要不要帮你找个更合适的地方哭? 53 00:02:59,166 --> 00:03:00,708 ‎免得你在这里丢人现眼 54 00:03:00,791 --> 00:03:06,083 ‎我的蝇蝇奶奶 ‎昨晚离开家后就没回来了 55 00:03:06,166 --> 00:03:09,166 ‎你的蝇蝇奶奶? 56 00:03:10,208 --> 00:03:11,833 ‎她去哪里了? 57 00:03:11,916 --> 00:03:14,875 ‎谢谢你的关心 麦克斯 58 00:03:16,333 --> 00:03:19,666 ‎她最后出现在…这里 59 00:03:19,750 --> 00:03:22,291 ‎那离你家也太近了 詹姆斯 60 00:03:23,583 --> 00:03:24,416 ‎她很小吗? 61 00:03:25,250 --> 00:03:26,083 ‎是的 62 00:03:26,166 --> 00:03:27,083 ‎弱不禁风? 63 00:03:27,166 --> 00:03:29,666 ‎-非常… ‎-她是不是整天打扰你? 64 00:03:29,750 --> 00:03:31,541 ‎经常打扰 65 00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:34,416 ‎这也是我最喜欢她的地方 66 00:03:34,500 --> 00:03:38,416 ‎蝇蝇家族感情非常好 67 00:03:40,041 --> 00:03:42,833 ‎不好意思 这是我的手机铃声 68 00:03:42,916 --> 00:03:44,041 ‎我得接这个电话 69 00:03:44,125 --> 00:03:47,041 ‎我的表亲们正在集合搜查队 70 00:03:47,125 --> 00:03:50,041 ‎我们要去找奶奶…就在今晚 71 00:03:52,416 --> 00:03:55,250 ‎-我打死的肯定是蝇蝇老师的奶奶! ‎-杀人犯! 72 00:03:55,333 --> 00:03:58,750 ‎我不是 那是意外 我是意外犯 73 00:03:58,833 --> 00:04:01,208 ‎你用《小妇人》拍了她15次 74 00:04:01,291 --> 00:04:04,166 ‎如果知道是他奶奶 ‎我就不会用那本名著打她了 75 00:04:04,250 --> 00:04:07,916 ‎毕竟内容是女人 ‎在家庭责任与个人成长间的抉择! 76 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:11,458 ‎他们已经在 ‎组织搜查队了 我们该怎么办? 77 00:04:11,541 --> 00:04:12,791 ‎帮我找到他奶奶! 78 00:04:23,333 --> 00:04:26,916 ‎找到了 黏在你嚼过的口香糖上了 79 00:04:30,916 --> 00:04:31,750 ‎恶心! 80 00:04:34,333 --> 00:04:36,208 ‎我为你感到骄傲 詹姆斯 81 00:04:36,291 --> 00:04:39,041 ‎你现在应该做的就是 82 00:04:39,125 --> 00:04:40,666 ‎带着尸体去警察局自首 83 00:04:40,750 --> 00:04:43,083 ‎我是坚决不会这么做的 84 00:04:43,166 --> 00:04:47,083 ‎我要把所有证据都藏起来 ‎没有尸体就没有犯罪 85 00:04:47,166 --> 00:04:49,458 ‎什么?但我已经是帮凶了 86 00:04:49,541 --> 00:04:52,708 ‎-如果再帮你 就加一条协助教唆罪了 ‎-教唆罪是什么? 87 00:04:52,791 --> 00:04:55,125 ‎我不知道 反正教唆听起来很猥琐 88 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:58,375 ‎有人来了 快把奶奶藏起来! 89 00:05:01,291 --> 00:05:03,791 ‎-你们想尝尝丑丑的葡萄干吗? ‎-什么? 90 00:05:03,875 --> 00:05:06,541 ‎你们要吃葡萄干吗?真是好吃死了 91 00:05:06,625 --> 00:05:08,250 ‎-不要 ‎-你呢 麦克斯? 92 00:05:08,333 --> 00:05:10,708 ‎不吃死不瞑目 93 00:05:10,791 --> 00:05:13,083 ‎-不用了 谢谢 ‎-原来你已经在吃了 94 00:05:13,166 --> 00:05:14,791 ‎麦克斯已经在吃葡萄干了? 95 00:05:14,875 --> 00:05:17,458 ‎我说过我没有杀人 别再来捣乱了 96 00:05:18,916 --> 00:05:19,791 ‎我的肩胛骨! 97 00:05:22,083 --> 00:05:23,791 ‎我嘴里充满了犯罪的味道 98 00:05:23,875 --> 00:05:26,250 ‎放松点 保持冷静 99 00:05:26,333 --> 00:05:28,125 ‎我在努力 但是太难了 100 00:05:28,208 --> 00:05:30,791 ‎我不是在跟你说话 我是在自言自语 101 00:05:30,875 --> 00:05:32,041 ‎因为我吓坏了! 102 00:05:32,125 --> 00:05:36,333 ‎你知道吗?不会有事的 ‎我们只需要把尸体处理掉 103 00:05:36,416 --> 00:05:40,041 ‎不行 我做不到! 104 00:05:40,125 --> 00:05:41,500 ‎好吧 105 00:05:42,583 --> 00:05:43,958 ‎待在这里 装我的声音 106 00:05:44,041 --> 00:05:46,833 ‎我的父母就不会发现我溜出去抛尸了 107 00:05:49,416 --> 00:05:52,041 ‎恶心 愚蠢 大喊大叫 108 00:05:52,125 --> 00:05:55,958 ‎重点是我和我的大脑袋 ‎无论是字面含义还是隐喻 109 00:05:56,041 --> 00:05:57,500 ‎耍帅 耍帅 话题走起 110 00:06:06,125 --> 00:06:08,500 ‎没有尸体就没有犯罪 111 00:06:13,833 --> 00:06:17,041 ‎-大功告成… ‎-我是迫不得已!它们盯上我们了! 112 00:06:17,833 --> 00:06:19,333 ‎麦克斯 你做了什么? 113 00:06:19,416 --> 00:06:20,500 ‎我别无选择 114 00:06:20,583 --> 00:06:22,916 ‎我杀了一只苍蝇 然后他们就一直来 115 00:06:25,500 --> 00:06:27,875 ‎它们就像被尸体吸引来的一样 116 00:06:33,666 --> 00:06:36,250 ‎麦克斯 冷静 我们还有办法 117 00:06:36,333 --> 00:06:38,250 ‎只要把他们全埋了 118 00:06:38,333 --> 00:06:42,541 ‎但这次你得帮我 ‎我们需要一个更大的勺子 119 00:06:44,583 --> 00:06:45,625 ‎你是说铲子吗? 120 00:06:46,125 --> 00:06:48,041 ‎(五金店) 121 00:06:51,541 --> 00:06:54,208 ‎我讨厌这么做 我觉得自己很肮脏 122 00:06:54,291 --> 00:06:55,375 ‎正好提醒了我 123 00:06:55,458 --> 00:06:57,875 ‎我们需要工业清洁剂来清除证据 124 00:06:57,958 --> 00:07:00,125 ‎走吧 我们去找… 125 00:07:02,125 --> 00:07:03,458 ‎你猜怎么着? 126 00:07:03,541 --> 00:07:07,958 ‎在搜查的过程中 ‎我又有八个亲戚失踪了 127 00:07:08,041 --> 00:07:11,958 ‎我知道里面肯定有猫腻 ‎我要去了结这一切 128 00:07:12,041 --> 00:07:18,666 ‎有时候 你必须得亲自动手 129 00:07:20,083 --> 00:07:21,416 ‎谢谢你告诉我这些 130 00:07:21,500 --> 00:07:23,666 ‎通常人们只会半夜过来 131 00:07:23,750 --> 00:07:26,666 ‎买一堆可疑物品 ‎但从来不会告诉我用途 132 00:07:29,041 --> 00:07:30,000 ‎来抱抱 133 00:07:30,458 --> 00:07:33,375 ‎麦克斯 我们得赶紧回家 ‎免得蝇蝇老师看到我们 134 00:07:33,458 --> 00:07:35,708 ‎(屠宰巷) 135 00:07:48,916 --> 00:07:51,333 ‎他发现了! 136 00:07:51,416 --> 00:07:52,583 ‎他怎么会发现呢? 137 00:07:57,166 --> 00:08:00,250 ‎走吧 我们去买酸奶冰淇淋吃 ‎别去想蝇蝇老师了 138 00:08:00,333 --> 00:08:02,291 ‎好的 但他可能会跟踪我们 139 00:08:02,375 --> 00:08:04,208 ‎所以我们要出其不意 140 00:08:07,333 --> 00:08:09,625 ‎快走 141 00:08:14,666 --> 00:08:17,083 ‎你不用再出其不意了 麦克斯 142 00:08:19,375 --> 00:08:23,500 ‎我的心里满是罪恶感 ‎酸奶冰淇淋都不香了 143 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,000 ‎苍蝇! 144 00:08:30,750 --> 00:08:34,750 ‎我又犯罪了!我到底是怎么了? 145 00:08:35,500 --> 00:08:37,041 ‎麦克斯!等等! 146 00:08:37,125 --> 00:08:39,916 ‎这里没人知道我们在掩盖犯罪! 147 00:08:42,041 --> 00:08:44,708 ‎嗨 詹姆斯 这是你的账单 148 00:08:44,791 --> 00:08:48,625 ‎以及想赢得免费的飞蝇钓之旅吗? 149 00:08:49,291 --> 00:08:50,791 ‎这是蝇头小楷的传单 150 00:08:51,541 --> 00:08:54,041 ‎你的衣服好看到馋蝇 151 00:08:54,791 --> 00:08:57,041 ‎你真是没头苍蝇 知道拉链开了吗? 152 00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:04,958 ‎我在胡言乱语什么? ‎詹姆斯从来不穿衣服的 153 00:09:12,375 --> 00:09:14,250 ‎保持冷静 154 00:09:24,916 --> 00:09:27,250 ‎苍蝇可是活物啊 詹姆斯 155 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:29,458 ‎死不瞑目 156 00:09:29,541 --> 00:09:31,666 ‎你真是没头苍蝇 知道拉链开了吗? 157 00:09:31,750 --> 00:09:32,583 ‎杀人犯 158 00:09:33,083 --> 00:09:34,458 ‎不是! 159 00:09:34,541 --> 00:09:37,208 ‎那是意外 我是意外犯 160 00:09:44,916 --> 00:09:45,875 ‎嗨 161 00:09:50,500 --> 00:09:51,916 ‎-嗨 ‎-苍蝇 162 00:09:54,875 --> 00:09:55,875 ‎苍蝇 163 00:09:57,291 --> 00:09:58,666 ‎-苍蝇 ‎-早上好 164 00:09:59,208 --> 00:10:01,500 ‎苍蝇! 165 00:10:05,666 --> 00:10:07,458 ‎蝇蝇一家人全来了? 166 00:10:07,541 --> 00:10:10,958 ‎要饼干吗?燕麦葡萄干饼干 167 00:10:23,833 --> 00:10:25,125 ‎这只是一场梦 168 00:10:45,791 --> 00:10:48,791 ‎完了!他发现我做过什么了 ‎现在要来报仇了 169 00:10:55,625 --> 00:10:57,250 ‎麦克斯! 170 00:10:57,333 --> 00:11:00,583 ‎所以你已经杀人了 ‎现在正在思考 “接下去怎么办?” 171 00:11:15,541 --> 00:11:17,250 ‎滚开 死苍蝇 172 00:11:36,250 --> 00:11:38,458 ‎拜托!别杀我! 173 00:11:40,750 --> 00:11:44,791 ‎天啊 174 00:11:44,875 --> 00:11:48,125 ‎抱歉 詹姆斯 ‎我还想着别让你看见我 175 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:50,166 ‎我一会可能会很吵 176 00:11:50,875 --> 00:11:53,291 ‎还会弄得很脏 177 00:11:53,375 --> 00:11:55,791 ‎求求你别伤害我 蝇蝇老师 178 00:11:55,875 --> 00:11:59,458 ‎我承认我把你奶奶打死了 ‎又把你的表亲都埋了 179 00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:02,333 ‎你说什么? 180 00:12:02,416 --> 00:12:04,458 ‎你的表亲 就是其它苍蝇 181 00:12:04,541 --> 00:12:06,166 ‎苍蝇? 182 00:12:07,750 --> 00:12:09,541 ‎詹姆斯 你在说什么呀? 183 00:12:09,625 --> 00:12:11,666 ‎我的亲戚都没事 184 00:12:11,750 --> 00:12:14,208 ‎蝇蝇奶奶根本没失踪 185 00:12:14,291 --> 00:12:15,250 ‎是的 186 00:12:15,333 --> 00:12:18,416 ‎原来集合搜查队是集合起来聚会 187 00:12:18,500 --> 00:12:20,541 ‎她只是不想邀请我 188 00:12:20,625 --> 00:12:23,291 ‎这也是我今晚来修排水沟渗漏的原因 189 00:12:23,375 --> 00:12:25,375 ‎我的什么沟? 190 00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:30,375 ‎最近的大雨暴露了 ‎你们家排水系统的许多问题 191 00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:33,166 ‎所以你父母雇我来修一修 192 00:12:33,250 --> 00:12:35,666 ‎我把打零工赚来的钱存起来 193 00:12:35,750 --> 00:12:39,625 ‎这样就可以送奶奶去坐游轮了 194 00:12:39,708 --> 00:12:41,041 ‎这么一来 说不定 195 00:12:41,125 --> 00:12:43,916 ‎她就会开始邀请我参加家庭聚会了 196 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:47,375 ‎而不是假装自己失踪或是死了 197 00:12:53,208 --> 00:12:56,958 ‎下降 下降 着陆 198 00:12:58,375 --> 00:13:00,041 ‎所以我没有犯法? 199 00:13:00,125 --> 00:13:01,541 ‎当然没有 200 00:13:01,625 --> 00:13:05,333 ‎打死苍蝇犯什么法了? 201 00:13:05,416 --> 00:13:07,375 ‎毕竟是在你的地盘上 对吧? 202 00:13:07,458 --> 00:13:09,791 ‎对!而且它们打扰到我了 203 00:13:09,875 --> 00:13:11,333 ‎杀人理由很充分 204 00:13:15,791 --> 00:13:17,750 ‎-不许动! ‎-我走了! 205 00:13:18,958 --> 00:13:21,041 ‎你因为谋杀被捕了 206 00:13:22,208 --> 00:13:23,833 ‎怎么可能?我杀了谁? 207 00:13:24,541 --> 00:13:26,583 ‎我崩溃了 我全招供了! 208 00:13:26,666 --> 00:13:27,833 ‎对不起! 209 00:13:30,125 --> 00:13:33,208 ‎你的朋友 ‎跟地方检察官达成了一项交易 210 00:13:33,291 --> 00:13:36,333 ‎而你将要被终身监禁! 211 00:13:37,708 --> 00:13:38,708 ‎终身? 212 00:13:39,875 --> 00:13:43,750 ‎101 102 103 213 00:13:43,833 --> 00:13:47,125 ‎这就是我入狱的故事 ‎我被判终身监禁 214 00:13:47,208 --> 00:13:48,500 ‎但也没那么糟 215 00:13:48,583 --> 00:13:51,041 ‎起码我做作业时 ‎再也不会有人打扰了 216 00:13:51,125 --> 00:13:52,000 ‎是吗? 217 00:13:52,083 --> 00:13:54,750 ‎因为在我听起来 你不过在拖延时间 218 00:13:54,833 --> 00:13:58,000 ‎不好意思打扰了 你被释放了 219 00:13:58,083 --> 00:14:01,125 ‎等等 什么?释放? ‎我以为我被判终身监禁了 220 00:14:01,208 --> 00:14:02,583 ‎我才被关了一天 221 00:14:02,666 --> 00:14:06,083 ‎对啊 苍蝇的终身也就这么短吧 222 00:14:13,958 --> 00:14:16,708 ‎-嘿!把手从我喇叭上拿开! ‎-不好意思 223 00:14:16,791 --> 00:14:19,000 ‎别靠在我的车上! 224 00:14:28,416 --> 00:14:30,541 ‎对不起 兄弟 我之前出卖你了 225 00:14:30,625 --> 00:14:33,666 ‎看到那么多钱 ‎我被蛊惑了 想着可以开始新生活 226 00:14:33,750 --> 00:14:36,416 ‎没事 我因祸得福练了一身腱子肉 227 00:14:44,708 --> 00:14:47,958 ‎-你杀了它! ‎-别担心 只是一只蚊子而已 228 00:14:48,041 --> 00:14:50,916 ‎詹姆斯 但我们在它们的地盘上! 229 00:15:26,750 --> 00:15:29,583 ‎字幕翻译:Ellen L