1 00:00:05,380 --> 00:00:08,216 Hi, handsome. How are you? 2 00:00:08,216 --> 00:00:09,509 Good. You? 3 00:00:09,509 --> 00:00:10,593 Hey, sexy. 4 00:00:10,593 --> 00:00:12,137 - Oh, I spent the night. - You did. 5 00:00:12,137 --> 00:00:14,514 - We gotta do less of these sleepovers. - Why? 6 00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:18,810 Because it makes us think that we're boyfriends again. And that means... 7 00:00:18,810 --> 00:00:20,729 It's a sleepover. It's fine, baby. 8 00:00:20,729 --> 00:00:24,023 Don't call me "baby." Call me Evan. I'm Evan... 9 00:00:24,023 --> 00:00:27,485 You're not just Evan to me. You're baby. You're my baby. 10 00:00:27,485 --> 00:00:30,155 If we just let ourselves float back into being boyfriends... 11 00:00:30,155 --> 00:00:31,906 - Where is the hole? - It's there. Put your arm in. 12 00:00:31,906 --> 00:00:34,325 ...then we're gonna be boyfriends again, and guess what's gonna happen? 13 00:00:34,325 --> 00:00:35,785 We're gonna have to break up again. 14 00:00:35,785 --> 00:00:36,870 - You're good. - Thank you. 15 00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:40,915 You're not gonna be able to find a real relationship if we keep doing this. 16 00:00:40,915 --> 00:00:44,043 I can't just be complacent in my own life. 17 00:00:44,043 --> 00:00:45,503 Shut up. Rude. 18 00:00:45,503 --> 00:00:48,590 Being with me is the only exciting part of your life. Remember that. 19 00:00:48,590 --> 00:00:50,842 You are very interesting. 20 00:00:50,842 --> 00:00:53,511 Do you have a clean toothbrush? I don't wanna use yours again. 21 00:00:53,511 --> 00:00:56,514 Baby, I literally spat in your mouth last night. You remember? 22 00:00:56,514 --> 00:00:57,891 It's different bacteria. 23 00:00:57,891 --> 00:01:00,185 You remember. 24 00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:02,312 Don't go. Let me give you head. 25 00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:03,396 I have to go. 26 00:01:03,396 --> 00:01:06,775 Wait, kiss. Hello? I love being your boyfriend. 27 00:01:06,775 --> 00:01:08,234 Okay, bye. 28 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:12,655 ♪ Kyrie eleison down the road That I must travel ♪ 29 00:01:13,615 --> 00:01:15,867 {\an8}♪ Kyrie eleison on... ♪ 30 00:01:15,867 --> 00:01:19,913 {\an8}Siri, text Malcolm, "No, I don't have your Apple Watch. 31 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:22,290 {\an8}I don't know when you would've even left that at my place. 32 00:01:22,290 --> 00:01:24,209 I'm always at your place, honestly." 33 00:01:36,095 --> 00:01:37,806 What? Mr. Marquez, no. What the fuck, bro? 34 00:01:37,806 --> 00:01:40,600 - Yo, what? Chill, queen. - What? 35 00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:43,311 Put your phones on silent. Get down. 36 00:01:43,311 --> 00:01:45,146 Is this gay panic? 37 00:01:45,980 --> 00:01:47,398 Lay flat. Lay flat. 38 00:01:48,441 --> 00:01:51,236 Lay flat. What are you doing? What are you doing? 39 00:01:52,195 --> 00:01:53,905 Mr. Marquez, it's not a shooting. 40 00:01:53,905 --> 00:01:54,989 It's gun club. 41 00:01:56,491 --> 00:01:58,117 What? Chill the eff out. 42 00:01:58,117 --> 00:01:59,202 Gun club? 43 00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:02,038 Yeah, Coach Hillridge started that shit back up. 44 00:02:05,583 --> 00:02:08,837 Why is... Why is there a gun club? 45 00:02:11,339 --> 00:02:13,466 To shoot guns? 46 00:02:16,177 --> 00:02:17,971 You should change that shirt. 47 00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:20,431 I have a crop top in my locker. Do you want it? 48 00:02:22,308 --> 00:02:26,104 ♪ My heart is old It holds my memories ♪ 49 00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:30,316 ♪ My body burns a gem-like flame ♪ 50 00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:31,401 Fire! 51 00:02:32,193 --> 00:02:33,194 Fire! 52 00:02:33,903 --> 00:02:36,239 Fire! Barrels down. 53 00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:39,742 ♪ Is where I find myself ♪ 54 00:02:41,744 --> 00:02:43,663 We have to talk about the list. Have you seen the list? 55 00:02:43,663 --> 00:02:46,040 No. But whatever that is, I have something way more important. 56 00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:47,750 Gwen, I thought I was gonna die this morning. 57 00:02:47,750 --> 00:02:50,003 Is it the tonsil? It's getting bigger. 58 00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:53,214 I'm sorry. Let me look. Let me see. 59 00:02:53,214 --> 00:02:54,507 No. It's not that. 60 00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:56,092 Gun... I heard gunshots. 61 00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:57,343 Oh. Wait. - Markie. 62 00:02:57,343 --> 00:02:59,554 He shot people? He's shooting people? He's hunting people? 63 00:02:59,554 --> 00:03:00,638 No. Evan, Gwen. Please, 64 00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:02,724 with the distractions. I'm low blood sugar right now. 65 00:03:02,724 --> 00:03:04,475 - Do you need an apple? Yeah? - Psst. 66 00:03:04,475 --> 00:03:06,769 Ev. Do you need a shirt? Trust exercises between teachers... 67 00:03:06,769 --> 00:03:07,896 I got some at home. 68 00:03:07,896 --> 00:03:09,981 I have shirts at home too. 69 00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:13,902 Okay. So if you have any more ideas to contribute, 70 00:03:13,902 --> 00:03:17,655 just talk to Lacey by 4:00 p.m. on Friday or forever hold your peace. 71 00:03:17,655 --> 00:03:21,659 And that is the last item on my godforsaken agenda. 72 00:03:21,659 --> 00:03:24,162 Okay. Anything else? No? Thank you. Great. All right. 73 00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:25,496 Hi. Hello. Oh, no, Evan. 74 00:03:25,496 --> 00:03:26,873 Please. We're already running late. 75 00:03:26,873 --> 00:03:28,333 This morning I was involved in a shooting. 76 00:03:28,333 --> 00:03:29,834 What? What? 77 00:03:29,834 --> 00:03:31,461 At least I thought it was a shooting, okay? 78 00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:33,379 It was actually Markie's new gun club. 79 00:03:35,214 --> 00:03:38,134 My life flashed before my eyes. 80 00:03:38,134 --> 00:03:42,305 To hear the sound of gunshots in a school environment in this day and age-- 81 00:03:42,305 --> 00:03:43,765 You're gonna say triggered? 82 00:03:43,765 --> 00:03:46,476 Thank you, Evan, for expressing your feelings about this. 83 00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:50,939 - We all understand. We all hear you. - I thought I was gonna die at work. 84 00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:52,482 Do you guys fucking get it? 85 00:03:52,482 --> 00:03:54,609 People are being gunned down in America 86 00:03:54,609 --> 00:03:55,818 - every day. - Yes. 87 00:03:55,818 --> 00:03:58,988 And I thought it was gonna be us today, okay? It felt so real. 88 00:03:58,988 --> 00:04:02,492 We need to shut this gun club down. 89 00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,786 Not happening, buddy. Seriously. 90 00:04:04,786 --> 00:04:08,665 The firearms safety program, it was shut down in the dark days of '99, okay? 91 00:04:08,665 --> 00:04:10,917 I am not about to let it get railroaded again. 92 00:04:10,917 --> 00:04:13,795 Okay, fine. So, actually, we can just wait for one of your little gun protégés 93 00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:15,880 to walk through that door with a semiautomatic-- 94 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:17,757 Whoa, whoa, whoa. That is not how that goes. 95 00:04:17,757 --> 00:04:20,176 Evan, Evan. It's a firearm safety program. 96 00:04:20,176 --> 00:04:22,553 Safety. It's designed to protect, man. 97 00:04:22,553 --> 00:04:25,932 It's all about teaching these kids how to do the right thing 98 00:04:25,932 --> 00:04:28,309 with these guns that are already out there. 99 00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:29,394 This is Texas. 100 00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:32,271 I can't even believe other people are okay with this. You all support this? 101 00:04:32,271 --> 00:04:33,898 I don't know. Maybe. No. 102 00:04:33,898 --> 00:04:36,901 It's not a democracy. It doesn't matter who's okay with it and who's not. 103 00:04:36,901 --> 00:04:40,071 What matters is that it is legal, and it's school board approved. 104 00:04:40,071 --> 00:04:41,990 And that is the end of this conversation. 105 00:04:41,990 --> 00:04:43,616 And for God's sakes, change your fucking shirt. 106 00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:46,285 I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to use the F word. I'm so sorry. 107 00:04:46,285 --> 00:04:48,538 Please, Gwen. Can I have that apple now, please? 108 00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:51,165 All right? Dismissed. Go inspire young minds, please. 109 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,001 Oh, my God. I gotta go. 110 00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:54,877 My mom and dad are getting back together. 111 00:04:54,877 --> 00:04:56,504 - Marquez. Evan. - What? 112 00:04:56,504 --> 00:04:57,714 Are you serious in there, man? 113 00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:00,216 Every time I try and do something important at this school, 114 00:05:00,216 --> 00:05:01,801 it's, like, you wanna get it shut down. 115 00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:04,679 I can't even talk to you about this, Markie. This is not a discussion. 116 00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:06,889 This is not some cute thing that you're doing wrong. 117 00:05:06,889 --> 00:05:07,974 This is people's lives. 118 00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:10,059 Well, hold on, man. You're hot and bothered right now. 119 00:05:10,059 --> 00:05:11,769 Where do the false equivalencies end with you? 120 00:05:11,769 --> 00:05:13,563 Where did you learn that expression? 121 00:05:13,563 --> 00:05:15,648 I'm doing, like, a Harvard extension online thing. 122 00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:17,692 I am so impressed. I did UT online. 123 00:05:17,692 --> 00:05:18,776 I am so in debt. 124 00:05:18,776 --> 00:05:21,070 There's no false equivalency, Markie. A gun is a gun. 125 00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:23,156 You give a kid a gun, you're giving a kid a gun. 126 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,158 Now everybody thinks you're a piece of shit, so-- 127 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:27,452 You are adorable when you're angry. 128 00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,662 I am giving them an education. I'm an educator. Okay? 129 00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:32,165 Save this activist thing for Facebook. 130 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:34,667 Nobody's on Facebook, Markie. How old are you? I'm shutting it down. 131 00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:36,210 I'm... I'm your age. 132 00:05:36,210 --> 00:05:37,378 No, you're not. 133 00:05:37,378 --> 00:05:38,880 Can we talk about the list now? 134 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:41,340 There's a list online of the hottest teachers ranked. 135 00:05:41,340 --> 00:05:43,301 What? And what? You're number one? 136 00:05:43,301 --> 00:05:44,427 - I'm 26. - What? 137 00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:45,928 - That's crazy. You're so hot. - Yeah. 138 00:05:45,928 --> 00:05:48,014 You must be reading it ba... Maybe 26 is the highest. 139 00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:50,475 No, I know. No. But I'm not reading it wrong. I'm 26. 140 00:05:50,475 --> 00:05:52,685 - It's insane. I'm going insane. - Where'd you find this? 141 00:05:52,685 --> 00:05:54,771 The student Discord. Rick texted it to me. He's on there 142 00:05:54,771 --> 00:05:56,939 - under a fake student name. - He should not be doing that. 143 00:05:56,939 --> 00:05:58,024 Anyway I'm shutting it down. 144 00:05:58,024 --> 00:06:00,068 You're gonna shut it down because you're low on the list? 145 00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:02,737 No, f-- for feminist reasons. This is terrible. 146 00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:04,572 Not because you're number 26? 147 00:06:04,572 --> 00:06:06,199 No. Why would I care about that? 148 00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:08,409 How do you shut down a list you're not supposed to know about? 149 00:06:08,409 --> 00:06:10,870 - That's the question. - Listen, this gun stuff, I'm serious. 150 00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:14,040 Like, you, me, all these kids. We could be dead right now. 151 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,958 Thirty-four years old. That would be it. 152 00:06:15,958 --> 00:06:18,294 Yeah. I switched to saying I'm 32 recently. But yeah. 153 00:06:18,294 --> 00:06:20,671 I'm not just watching this stuff happen on the news anymore. Okay? 154 00:06:20,671 --> 00:06:23,633 I'm not gonna be a statistic. I'm doing something about this. 155 00:06:23,633 --> 00:06:27,178 Wow, that's good. You say that, and I'm, like, I'm on your side. 156 00:06:27,929 --> 00:06:30,807 I'm not gonna let you guys become statistics. 157 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,266 I'm doing something about this. 158 00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:34,477 Yeah, I'ma do something about this dick. 159 00:06:34,477 --> 00:06:37,438 That's what you got out of that, Frank? Come on, man. 160 00:06:37,438 --> 00:06:40,108 I mean, it's a gun safety course, Mr. Marquez. 161 00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:42,902 You think shutting that down is gonna do anything about gun violence? 162 00:06:42,902 --> 00:06:44,403 It's the principle of it. 163 00:06:44,403 --> 00:06:47,281 He's trying to take a stand. 164 00:06:47,281 --> 00:06:48,658 I am taking a stand, Jeff. 165 00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:52,161 I'm taking a stand, okay? I don't care if you guys get it. 166 00:06:52,161 --> 00:06:53,287 Of course we get it. 167 00:06:53,287 --> 00:06:56,624 We've been doing drills our entire lives. We're used to it. 168 00:06:56,624 --> 00:06:59,961 You shouldn't be used to it. That is so depressing. 169 00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:01,379 It's not that depressing. 170 00:07:01,379 --> 00:07:03,172 Mr. Marquez, I'm with you. I'm super anti-gun. 171 00:07:03,172 --> 00:07:05,133 Hartman, we know you're anti-gun. 172 00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:06,676 Your parents are, like, hippies. 173 00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:08,302 They are, like, anti-electricity. 174 00:07:08,302 --> 00:07:11,472 They're not anti-electricity, they're pro-wind turbines. 175 00:07:11,472 --> 00:07:13,683 Look, I get that you guys have gotten used to this, 176 00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:16,269 but you shouldn't be used to it, okay? 177 00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:19,647 To me, if I grew up in this environment, I would feel insane. 178 00:07:19,647 --> 00:07:23,818 Like, you are probably having levels of cortisol in your body 179 00:07:23,818 --> 00:07:25,695 that you don't even realize are there. 180 00:07:25,695 --> 00:07:27,155 What's cortisol? 181 00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:28,739 There's really nothing we can do about it. 182 00:07:28,739 --> 00:07:32,368 It's like a... It's like a shark attack. It's like a force-of-nature kind of thing. 183 00:07:32,368 --> 00:07:35,913 It's not a force of nature. This is what I'm saying. 184 00:07:35,913 --> 00:07:38,124 This is a completely preventable problem. 185 00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:41,252 But it's not preventable if we can't get the government to do anything about it. 186 00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:42,920 The gun lobby's too powerful. 187 00:07:44,547 --> 00:07:46,007 They killed my stepdad. 188 00:07:46,007 --> 00:07:47,800 Oh, my God, Jeff. That's crazy. 189 00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:49,719 This is the kind of stuff I'm talking about. 190 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:51,888 I'm just playing with you. But you know the vibes. 191 00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:53,347 Jeff, you have trauma. 192 00:07:53,347 --> 00:07:54,432 From being so cool. 193 00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:55,558 Who said you're cool? 194 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:59,687 I mean, safety-wise, there's that one door that has metal detectors. 195 00:07:59,687 --> 00:08:01,814 Becca, nobody goes through that door. 196 00:08:01,814 --> 00:08:03,274 You can't bring metal through it. 197 00:08:03,274 --> 00:08:05,318 No, you can go through it. It just beeps. 198 00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:07,778 I don't know. I just feel like when I was you guys' age, 199 00:08:07,778 --> 00:08:11,032 like, if we wanted to change something, we would do something about it. 200 00:08:11,032 --> 00:08:13,242 We would speak truth to power. You know? 201 00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:14,660 Like, about what? 202 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:18,372 Like, we would protest, like, Bush getting reelected. 203 00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:20,208 And we were trying to get Kerry in office. 204 00:08:20,208 --> 00:08:21,292 Did it work? 205 00:08:23,211 --> 00:08:25,504 Oh, my God. I just thought of something. I'm a genius. 206 00:08:25,504 --> 00:08:28,299 What if we did a protest? 207 00:08:28,299 --> 00:08:30,676 But, like, to show that we disagree with the gun club. 208 00:08:30,676 --> 00:08:33,679 Right. Well, that is what I've been saying this whole time. But yes, sure. 209 00:08:33,679 --> 00:08:35,640 If we're gonna do a protest, it needs to be inside 210 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:37,475 because my hair will get insane. 211 00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:41,145 Oh. My cousin just did a-- a drunk-driving protest at her school. 212 00:08:41,145 --> 00:08:43,231 We could try to do something like that. 213 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:45,733 But I wouldn't know how to organize that. 214 00:08:45,733 --> 00:08:48,653 Why is it hard to organize? You guys are on all these group chats, right? 215 00:08:48,653 --> 00:08:50,947 I'm not in any group chats. 216 00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:53,199 I'm a one-on-one guy. 217 00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:26,023 Dude, is this one of those drunk-driving things? 218 00:09:26,023 --> 00:09:28,526 It's an anti-getting-killed-by-guns protest. 219 00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:31,070 The kids are making their voices heard. I'm joining them. 220 00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:34,490 That's good. I'm so anti-death, so I'm, like, so on board. 221 00:09:34,490 --> 00:09:36,909 Ghosts. Duality of life and death. 222 00:09:38,244 --> 00:09:40,371 It's an anti-gun-club protest. 223 00:09:40,371 --> 00:09:41,622 Oh, it's not reading like that. 224 00:09:41,622 --> 00:09:44,041 What is going on? You look like Erin Brockovich. 225 00:09:44,041 --> 00:09:45,418 I always look like this. 226 00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:47,795 Lies. She's doing it because of the list. 227 00:09:47,795 --> 00:09:51,132 No. But seriously, who is making that list, right? 228 00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:53,009 'Cause we know who's making the hot list. 229 00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:54,969 Who makes it? Who is it? 230 00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:56,304 Um, I don't know. 231 00:09:56,304 --> 00:09:58,180 - Damn it. - Nobody knows who makes the list. 232 00:10:00,891 --> 00:10:04,145 - What the hell is this? - Oh, God. 233 00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:06,981 {\an8}Just a little protest. Yeah, that's right. 234 00:10:07,481 --> 00:10:10,151 {\an8}Some of the kids in my program heard about what y'all were up to 235 00:10:10,151 --> 00:10:12,903 {\an8}and decided they wanted to make their voices known too. 236 00:10:12,903 --> 00:10:14,989 You're doing a protest? What are you protesting? 237 00:10:14,989 --> 00:10:17,283 Protesting y'all for bullying us. 238 00:10:17,283 --> 00:10:18,451 Bullying you? 239 00:10:18,451 --> 00:10:20,828 Yeah. Trying to bully us out of having guns. 240 00:10:20,828 --> 00:10:22,997 If we can't have guns, then we can't protect ourselves. 241 00:10:22,997 --> 00:10:25,583 Protect yourselves against what, Markie? 242 00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:27,168 People with guns. 243 00:10:27,168 --> 00:10:30,755 You're saying if you can't protect yourself from guns, then you're dead. 244 00:10:30,755 --> 00:10:32,173 So guns are the problem. 245 00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:35,509 If there were no guns, there would be no problem. Are you starting to see that? 246 00:10:35,509 --> 00:10:37,178 I'm starting to see that you're the problem. 247 00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:40,222 You don't understand that we already live in a world where guns exist, Evan. 248 00:10:40,222 --> 00:10:42,350 Coach Hillridge! - We already... Guns are already here. 249 00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:43,851 Coach! 250 00:10:43,851 --> 00:10:46,020 What? 251 00:10:46,812 --> 00:10:48,230 - What? - Let's go. 252 00:10:48,230 --> 00:10:51,442 - We're not even meeting on school grounds. - You are promoting death. 253 00:10:51,442 --> 00:10:53,027 I am not promoting death. 254 00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:54,695 - Oh, come on. - Please, Just try to be civil. 255 00:10:54,695 --> 00:10:56,113 No, no, no, no. - Civil. Civil. Civil. 256 00:10:56,113 --> 00:10:58,532 What does a gun do other than kill people? 257 00:10:58,532 --> 00:11:01,118 - Uh, protect people. It protects people. - From what? 258 00:11:01,118 --> 00:11:03,954 - People who don't know how to use-- - From people who have guns to kill people. 259 00:11:03,954 --> 00:11:05,664 You know, Evan, man, 260 00:11:05,664 --> 00:11:09,543 I'm trying to do something for the kids. I'm trying to give 'em a skill, a lesson. 261 00:11:09,543 --> 00:11:11,796 Yeah, but the problem is, when you do something like that, 262 00:11:11,796 --> 00:11:13,422 it doesn't work 'cause you're an idiot. 263 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:23,599 Markie, Markie. Markie, Markie. Mar... Markie. 264 00:11:24,183 --> 00:11:25,935 Oh, God, Evan. 265 00:11:25,935 --> 00:11:28,813 Oh, God. I feel bad for saying that. 266 00:11:29,355 --> 00:11:32,942 Look. Politically, I agree with you. 267 00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:36,445 - You're anti-gun? - Well, you know. But... You know? 268 00:11:36,445 --> 00:11:37,822 See, I can't track your politics. 269 00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:40,658 I do it on purpose. I can't. It's, like, I have to... 270 00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:43,577 Look, I can't do anything about it. 271 00:11:43,577 --> 00:11:46,831 The rules are very clear, and I just have to stay out of it. 272 00:11:46,831 --> 00:11:48,582 Just... Every possible way. I just have to. 273 00:11:48,582 --> 00:11:49,875 It's your favorite thing to do. 274 00:11:49,875 --> 00:11:51,669 Basically, yes. All right? 275 00:11:51,669 --> 00:11:55,339 So, the club stays, unless there's an active threat, which there is not. 276 00:11:55,339 --> 00:11:57,091 What constitutes an active threat? 277 00:11:57,091 --> 00:11:58,551 Evan, do not do anything stupid. 278 00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,845 What? I wasn't even thinking of doing anything. 279 00:12:00,845 --> 00:12:03,472 I'm literally asking, what's an active threat? 280 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:07,977 Now I'm thinking something. 281 00:12:15,776 --> 00:12:16,777 Hello? 282 00:12:17,278 --> 00:12:18,404 Crime and Punishment. 283 00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:20,948 An incredible book, but what if that were you? 284 00:12:20,948 --> 00:12:24,910 What if you were Raskolnikov, and you could get away with anything? 285 00:12:25,828 --> 00:12:29,999 We all have this voice inside of us that's kind of dark and weird and scary. 286 00:12:29,999 --> 00:12:32,126 And society tells us to push that down. 287 00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:34,545 I say, "Eff you, society." Right? 288 00:12:34,545 --> 00:12:37,506 We got to express ourselves. That's what our friend Fyodor did. 289 00:12:37,506 --> 00:12:40,593 Worked out pretty well for him. And this book sold a lot of copies. 290 00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:43,053 Guys, this is English class, okay? 291 00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:48,726 This is a safe space for you to say anything, no matter how scary, how dark. 292 00:12:48,726 --> 00:12:53,731 I want you... When you write in here, to forget anything 293 00:12:53,731 --> 00:12:58,110 that anyone reading this might think about what you're writing, and just write. 294 00:12:58,110 --> 00:12:59,778 You're talking about creative writing? 295 00:12:59,778 --> 00:13:01,655 Creative writing. That's what we're doing. 296 00:13:01,655 --> 00:13:03,657 Three pages of creative writing. 297 00:13:03,657 --> 00:13:09,455 And the subject is, "If you could get away with any heinous act, what would you do?" 298 00:13:09,455 --> 00:13:12,416 Really get into this one, guys. Go wild. 299 00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:16,170 It's gonna be fun. I wanna hear some nasty stuff, okay? 300 00:13:16,170 --> 00:13:18,130 And if it's a little bit of this... 301 00:13:18,130 --> 00:13:21,467 You know, I don't wanna say the word for this, but if these are involved, 302 00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:23,219 maybe a little bit of extra credit. I don't... 303 00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:26,222 Question. Is this for a grade? 304 00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:29,350 Just pass-fail, yeah. And as long as it's violent and heinous, it's a pass. 305 00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:31,393 So, like, is this double-spaced or... 306 00:13:31,393 --> 00:13:32,478 I don't care. 307 00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:36,357 So I don't get it. Like, you want someone to write an essay about killing you? 308 00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:37,691 No, it doesn't need to be about me. 309 00:13:37,691 --> 00:13:40,945 It just has to be something, like, threatening for the school. 310 00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:42,446 Yo, where's Nick? 311 00:13:42,446 --> 00:13:45,741 He's at Buffalo Wild Wings with his work friends. Or his ex-work friends, 312 00:13:45,741 --> 00:13:48,869 'cause they still work there, but he got laid off. Obviously. 313 00:13:48,869 --> 00:13:50,204 Glad I don't have a day job. 314 00:13:50,204 --> 00:13:51,622 Hi. Malcolm. 315 00:13:51,622 --> 00:13:52,706 Come on in. - Oh, God. 316 00:13:52,706 --> 00:13:55,459 Oh, my fucking God. Wait, what happened to your yard? 317 00:13:55,459 --> 00:13:57,836 Were you bombed? It looks horrible. 318 00:13:57,836 --> 00:13:59,088 No, Nick's building a pool! 319 00:13:59,755 --> 00:14:02,383 - By hand? - Why is that what everybody focuses on? 320 00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:03,676 Pay. Pay people to do that. 321 00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,177 Malcolm, check it out. 322 00:14:05,177 --> 00:14:07,471 I found these rocks in the hole. They look like teeth. 323 00:14:07,471 --> 00:14:08,556 Oh, those are teeth. 324 00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:10,266 What? I was touching chips... You invited him? 325 00:14:10,266 --> 00:14:12,810 Yeah, he said you guys are back together. Oh, my God, dude. 326 00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:14,687 - Touching chips then teeth. - We're not back together. 327 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,522 What? He sent me a picture of you in bed. 328 00:14:16,522 --> 00:14:18,482 Gwen. This look. Yeah. 329 00:14:18,482 --> 00:14:21,068 Very sexy, I love it. It's new for you, right? 330 00:14:21,068 --> 00:14:23,070 - I knew you'd like it. - You usually look not sexy. 331 00:14:23,070 --> 00:14:24,405 - Okay. - No, it looks hot. It's good. 332 00:14:24,405 --> 00:14:26,865 She's doing it because she fell six spots down the list. 333 00:14:26,865 --> 00:14:28,617 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No, I'm not. 334 00:14:28,617 --> 00:14:30,160 What? What? What? 335 00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:31,620 - Active threat. Active threat. - What? 336 00:14:31,620 --> 00:14:32,746 Active threat. 337 00:14:32,746 --> 00:14:34,039 This is it. This is the one. 338 00:14:34,039 --> 00:14:37,084 This is... This is really intense. 339 00:14:37,084 --> 00:14:38,586 I mean, this is concerning maybe. I... 340 00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:39,670 Like, how? Look at this. 341 00:14:39,670 --> 00:14:42,131 He goes, "They'll pay. They'll pay with their lives." 342 00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:43,465 That doesn't seem bad. 343 00:14:43,465 --> 00:14:46,135 "This is me talking. This isn't fiction anymore. 344 00:14:46,135 --> 00:14:50,097 I've got an unslakable thirst that can only be quenched by blood." 345 00:14:50,097 --> 00:14:52,558 Blood? It could be a vampire. 346 00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:54,852 Ultimately, compelling. I mean, like, I'm hooked. 347 00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:56,937 This is gonna work. We're shutting it down. 348 00:14:56,937 --> 00:14:59,315 Incredible. Shut it down! 349 00:15:02,359 --> 00:15:06,447 As you all know, an active threat was found in our community last night. 350 00:15:06,447 --> 00:15:08,490 A number of measures have been taken. 351 00:15:08,490 --> 00:15:11,076 Of course, the student in question, who will not be named here, 352 00:15:11,076 --> 00:15:13,162 will be entering immediate evaluation. 353 00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:15,914 Also, metal detectors will be installed 354 00:15:15,914 --> 00:15:18,000 at the remaining entrances throughout the school. 355 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,418 This is awful news. 356 00:15:19,418 --> 00:15:21,629 And I suppose this part goes without saying, 357 00:15:21,629 --> 00:15:24,465 but effective immediately, the gun club... 358 00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:25,799 Firearms safety program. 359 00:15:25,799 --> 00:15:27,217 ...will be suspended indefinitely. 360 00:15:27,217 --> 00:15:28,677 What? No. 361 00:15:28,677 --> 00:15:29,845 There it is. 362 00:15:30,387 --> 00:15:33,432 Okay. And that's how gun club dies again. 363 00:15:33,432 --> 00:15:35,517 Not with a bang, but with a whimper. 364 00:15:35,517 --> 00:15:37,478 Taken out back and just George-and-Lennied. 365 00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:38,646 Just... That's it? We're done? 366 00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:41,231 Markie, please. If you make a speech, then Evan has to make a speech. 367 00:15:41,231 --> 00:15:42,691 And... No speeches while I'm speaking! 368 00:15:42,691 --> 00:15:44,568 Okay, fine. - Okay? I shouldn't have to say that. 369 00:15:44,568 --> 00:15:47,738 All right. Anyway, gun thing is canceled, okay? 370 00:15:47,738 --> 00:15:52,368 However, per the district's instructions, thanks to Evan here... 371 00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:54,078 Whoo-hoo! Evan's our guy. 372 00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:56,747 ...we will now begin immediate firearm training for all faculty. 373 00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:58,374 - What? - Sorry, what? 374 00:15:58,374 --> 00:16:00,042 Never mind. That's bad. 375 00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:02,252 Each classroom will now have a gun in a lockbox 376 00:16:02,252 --> 00:16:04,088 to be accessed in case of a threat. Okay. 377 00:16:04,088 --> 00:16:05,631 I'd like to opt out of that option. 378 00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:08,926 Too bad. Firearm training starts tomorrow, and Markie will lead it. 379 00:16:08,926 --> 00:16:10,844 Oh. You're all in good hands. 380 00:16:10,844 --> 00:16:13,722 Okay, you know what? You know what? I have something to say. 381 00:16:13,722 --> 00:16:14,807 Is this not a speech? 382 00:16:14,807 --> 00:16:16,725 I don't think this is all bad, 383 00:16:16,725 --> 00:16:19,311 even though, you know, we all have to learn how to use guns now, 384 00:16:19,311 --> 00:16:21,814 because the kids no longer have guns. 385 00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:24,149 And that is really what this was all about to me, 386 00:16:24,149 --> 00:16:26,694 and it should have been about that to you all too. 387 00:16:26,694 --> 00:16:28,612 So, a success was achieved. 388 00:16:28,612 --> 00:16:29,738 Legendary. - Nice one, buddy. 389 00:16:30,739 --> 00:16:34,201 And last but not least, free-writing assignments will now be banned. 390 00:16:34,201 --> 00:16:35,327 Yes. That's terrible. 391 00:16:35,327 --> 00:16:37,955 That is good, actually, with how this all shook out. 392 00:16:37,955 --> 00:16:39,123 Yeah, exactly. 393 00:16:39,123 --> 00:16:41,834 - Hey, Jeff. Hey. - What's up, Ms. Sanders? 394 00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,585 So you like making lists, huh? 395 00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:45,963 How do you know about that? 396 00:16:45,963 --> 00:16:48,382 I know about it 'cause I've been working on this all week. 397 00:16:48,382 --> 00:16:50,634 And Becca literally just told me that it's you. 398 00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:54,304 - Damn. - Listen, Jeff... 399 00:16:54,304 --> 00:16:58,267 I just... I-- I just wanna know, like, why am I low on the list? 400 00:16:58,267 --> 00:17:01,103 Just out of curiosity. I don't actually care. I just... I'm curious. 401 00:17:01,103 --> 00:17:02,563 And you want the truth? 402 00:17:02,563 --> 00:17:04,606 Yeah, of course. Yes. 403 00:17:04,606 --> 00:17:06,775 Ever since I saw the list was affecting how you dress, 404 00:17:06,775 --> 00:17:08,318 I started manipulating you. 405 00:17:08,318 --> 00:17:09,778 Sick. What? 406 00:17:09,778 --> 00:17:13,323 What? No. No, like, I want you to dress well. Elegant. 407 00:17:13,323 --> 00:17:14,700 - You're a 34-year-old woman. - 32. 408 00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:17,703 - Still have nearly half your life ahead. - You think I'm gonna live to 60? 409 00:17:17,703 --> 00:17:20,247 You don't have to wear plain dresses just because you have a tough job 410 00:17:20,247 --> 00:17:22,249 - and your boyfriend's going insane. - What? 411 00:17:22,249 --> 00:17:24,042 Look, I actually put together some looks for you. 412 00:17:24,042 --> 00:17:25,461 You put together some looks? 413 00:17:26,128 --> 00:17:27,463 Oh, wow. It's... Okay. 414 00:17:27,463 --> 00:17:28,547 What do you got here? 415 00:17:29,173 --> 00:17:30,549 I like that blazer. That's good. 416 00:17:30,549 --> 00:17:32,843 I like that belt too, that high. That's good. 417 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:35,637 God, I like these shoes though. It's cute with the... with the wedge. 418 00:17:35,637 --> 00:17:37,389 Those are Giuseppe Zanotti. 419 00:17:37,389 --> 00:17:38,682 Sus-eppe Zan-oni? 420 00:17:38,682 --> 00:17:40,434 No, stop. Okay. 421 00:17:40,434 --> 00:17:42,311 Email this to me. But seriously, 422 00:17:42,311 --> 00:17:45,481 this is wrong, Jeff. You know what? I'm gonna give you detention. 423 00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:48,984 You shouldn't be manipulating teachers. You shouldn't be objectifying teachers. 424 00:17:48,984 --> 00:17:50,694 Okay, I'm just saying, you look good in teal. 425 00:17:50,694 --> 00:17:52,029 Shut up. 426 00:17:52,738 --> 00:17:53,739 But thank you. 427 00:17:57,451 --> 00:17:58,827 What the fuck, Mr. Marquez? 428 00:17:58,827 --> 00:18:00,621 Oh, Pablo, hey. 429 00:18:00,621 --> 00:18:03,040 I... I'm so sorry about all of this. 430 00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:06,001 But that was really a particularly violent essay. 431 00:18:06,001 --> 00:18:08,921 What's wrong with violent? I was inspired by the concept of murder. 432 00:18:09,463 --> 00:18:10,506 You were what? 433 00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:12,424 I was inspired by the concept of murder. 434 00:18:12,424 --> 00:18:16,261 Well, look, I mean, it's all gonna be fine. 435 00:18:16,261 --> 00:18:19,431 You're under 18. This is not gonna go on your permanent record. 436 00:18:19,431 --> 00:18:21,433 And I even wrote a letter for your file 437 00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:24,019 taking full responsibility for the assignment. You'll be fine. 438 00:18:24,019 --> 00:18:26,021 Now I have to go to therapy three times a week. 439 00:18:26,021 --> 00:18:29,316 Yeah. I mean, people pay a lot of money for therapy, right? 440 00:18:29,316 --> 00:18:30,818 You're getting it for free. 441 00:18:30,818 --> 00:18:33,612 I guess now I know who to talk to about my intrusive thoughts. 442 00:18:33,612 --> 00:18:35,447 What intrusive thoughts do you have? 443 00:18:36,031 --> 00:18:37,699 Just stuff about buying a new car. 444 00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:40,661 Right. Exactly. 445 00:18:40,661 --> 00:18:43,455 So we can call it a win-win, right? Okay. 446 00:18:44,289 --> 00:18:45,290 I guess we're cool. 447 00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:47,292 Don't get on my list though. 448 00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:53,048 No, I can't believe we have to get firearms training now. 449 00:18:53,048 --> 00:18:54,383 Markie's gonna fucking shoot us. 450 00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:56,385 It's fine. We'll just get through it. 451 00:18:56,385 --> 00:18:58,428 You're just saying that 'cause it's your fault. 452 00:18:58,428 --> 00:18:59,930 I was trying to do something good. 453 00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:02,641 What if we all get into gunfights, like, every day now? 454 00:19:02,641 --> 00:19:04,101 Yeah, that would suck. 455 00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:06,520 Well, at least we get to be outside, and we're together. 456 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:08,105 See, this outfit is working. 457 00:19:08,105 --> 00:19:09,439 I know. 458 00:19:09,439 --> 00:19:10,524 All right. 459 00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:13,777 The only thing stronger than a bad guy with a gun is? 460 00:19:13,777 --> 00:19:15,070 A girl with a gun. 461 00:19:15,070 --> 00:19:16,321 A good guy with a gun. 462 00:19:16,321 --> 00:19:17,656 Which one are you? 463 00:19:17,656 --> 00:19:19,491 Listen, Evan. I know, man. 464 00:19:19,491 --> 00:19:21,785 I know you're pissed at me. I know you think you won something. 465 00:19:21,785 --> 00:19:23,120 I did win, okay? 466 00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:25,581 In my own way, because no, I didn't end gun violence, 467 00:19:25,581 --> 00:19:28,542 but I got some guns out of some kids' hands. 468 00:19:28,542 --> 00:19:30,836 And that is good, Markie. I made the world a better place. 469 00:19:30,836 --> 00:19:33,005 I don't care how much shit you give me. We're on the same side. 470 00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:36,216 Okay, buddy? Seriously, we're the good guys here, man. 471 00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:37,885 Think about it like this. 472 00:19:37,885 --> 00:19:40,429 You've worked your whole life to become a power bottom, 473 00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:42,389 now you get to be a power bottom with a gun. 474 00:19:42,389 --> 00:19:44,433 You think I'm a bottom after this whole week? 475 00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:46,101 Honestly? - He's only bottomed, like, once. 476 00:19:46,101 --> 00:19:49,396 Can we please shoot, please? Evan, can you... Markie, please? 477 00:19:49,396 --> 00:19:51,189 Here we go. This is what we're here for. 478 00:19:51,189 --> 00:19:52,274 - Aim. - Markie. 479 00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:53,567 - What? - I don't need your advice. 480 00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:55,611 - I know you need my advice. This has... - Please back up. 481 00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:57,613 - This is very straightforward. - Buddy. It's not. 482 00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:59,156 There's the bull's-eye, here's the gun. 483 00:19:59,156 --> 00:20:01,199 - No, it's called recoil. - I'm doing it. Back up. 484 00:20:01,199 --> 00:20:03,201 - Oh, shit, man. Whoa! - Okay. Okay. 485 00:20:03,201 --> 00:20:05,120 You okay? You okay? Did you break your wrist? 486 00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:06,663 Yeah, I'm fine. 487 00:20:06,663 --> 00:20:08,916 - You okay? - I don't know. I don't know. 488 00:20:08,916 --> 00:20:11,710 Actually, hey, look at that. 489 00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:13,962 Bull's-eye, huh? 490 00:20:13,962 --> 00:20:16,506 Look at you. Feel that power, buddy. 491 00:20:16,506 --> 00:20:17,758 Oh, hell yeah. 492 00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:24,264 ♪ Kyrie eleison down the road That I must travel ♪ 493 00:20:25,390 --> 00:20:30,604 ♪ Kyrie eleison Through the darkness of the night ♪ 494 00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:35,067 ♪ Kyrie eleison, where I'm going Will you follow? ♪ 495 00:20:36,026 --> 00:20:41,323 ♪ Kyrie eleison On a highway in the night ♪ 496 00:20:41,323 --> 00:20:45,661 ♪ Kyrie eleison down the road That I must travel ♪ 497 00:20:46,703 --> 00:20:51,959 ♪ Kyrie eleison Through the darkness of the night ♪ 498 00:20:51,959 --> 00:20:56,421 ♪ Kyrie eleison, where I'm going Will you follow? 499 00:20:57,422 --> 00:21:02,678 ♪ Kyrie eleison On a highway in the night ♪ 500 00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:07,182 ♪ Kyrie eleison down the road That I must travel ♪