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00:00:01,070 --> 00:00:02,312
[instructor] Up, one!
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00:00:03,072 --> 00:00:05,729
- Up, two!
- [groans]
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00:00:05,729 --> 00:00:07,490
- Up, three!
- [groaning continues]
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00:00:07,490 --> 00:00:09,699
You want the margarita?
Prove it!
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00:00:09,699 --> 00:00:11,321
Oh, my God. [chuckles]
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- Hey, Harry.
- [instructor] Up!
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Um, do you come--
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00:00:14,635 --> 00:00:16,602
- [instructor] Up!
- I can'’t--
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00:00:16,602 --> 00:00:18,156
- [instructor] Up!
- I can'’t hear you.
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Do you-- Okay,
we can talk after.
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00:00:19,778 --> 00:00:21,642
["I Can Dream About You"
by Dan Hartman plays]
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- I didn'’t know you came to this.
- Yeah.
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It'’s kind of
intense, but I'’m into it.
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[pants] Yeah.
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All right.
I think I'’m gonna go shower off.
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Oh, yes. They got
nice showers here.
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♪ I'’m not hiding ♪
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♪ The remedy to cure
This old heart of mine ♪
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♪ I can dream about you
If I can'’t
Hold you tonight...♪
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- It'’s huge.
- [Gwen] Just like--
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Just so big. And I
hate that I saw it.
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- And it makes you, like, sick?
- No, it'’s, like, inappropriate.
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Like, I shouldn'’t know
what another teacher'’s dick
in this school looks like.
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Ah. But it'’s, like,
a locker room. Doesn'’t that
happen all the time?
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No, no, no. You don'’t get it,
Gwen. He wanted me to see it.
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- And he got what he wanted.
- Oh, you thought
he did it on purpose?
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Yes. I'’m telling you.
I'’m coming out of the shower.
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He sees me.
He goes like this. Really.
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Maybe he'’s, like, not even gay,
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and he was just like... [grunts]
..."God, what'’s up?"
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No, no, he'’s gay.
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He has a rainbow flag
in his Instagram bio.
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Well, maybe he'’s an ally.
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Maybe he'’s an ally
by means of being gay
and hooking up with guys.
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I'’ve literally talked to him
about dating men.
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- Okay. So, what'’s the problem?
Sorry, I'’m not tracking.
- He'’s attractive.
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Then he puts his horse cock
in my face this morning,
and I'’m not allowed to...
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- Suck it?
- No, date other faculty.
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Because of the
investigation thing.
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00:01:32,851 --> 00:01:34,577
Oh.
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Maybe he'’s not trying
to date you. Like,
that feels kind of like a leap.
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No, he'’s trying to date me.
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As you know,
we'’re in the process
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of replacing our school mascot
"The Dragons"
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with the newly voted upon
"The Horses." "The Horses."
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A student competition is
underway to help choose the new
logo. The new look of the logo--
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Did you get a chance
to take a look at any of those?
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The kids are
mostly drawing penises.
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Uh, well, no,
I haven'’t had a chance,
but that is disappointing.
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So what I was thinking is,
I actually know
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this great company
that can help out with this.
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They redid the mascots for,
like, five or six
local schools last year.
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Really did a bang-up job.
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They let the kids
come up with the art,
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but then this company
comes in and executes.
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Makes it looks
completely professional.
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Okay, the student logo design
competition is already
underway, Rick--
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Listen, man! This is
personal. All right?
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"The Dragons" was
offensive to my people.
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[stammers] Your people?
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What people? College counselors?
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My people.
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The people that I come from.
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Heaven?
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Whatever he is, his
lineage should be celebrated.
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Whether he be a white man,
a Black man,
a proud Indian brave--
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- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Jesus, Markie.
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Thank you.
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Rick, if you know of a company
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that can handle this
in a professional
and effective manner,
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then yes, you can be our liaison
on that, all right?
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Yes! Hell, yeah. Let'’s get it.
All right, guys.
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This is perfect timing actually
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because kids aren'’t even
thinking about college yet.
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It'’s your company, right?
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- Who'’s to say?
- No, it'’s his company.
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Last but not least, we need
to assign some duties
and committees.
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Gwendolyn, I need you
on bus duty this week.
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00:03:03,459 --> 00:03:05,806
And from what I can tell,
the only person
not on a committee
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00:03:05,806 --> 00:03:07,704
is you, Evan and Harry,
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00:03:07,704 --> 00:03:12,571
so, uh, I'’m gonna have
you two together to head up
the homecoming dance, all right?
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- Okay.
- No. No, no, no.
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- I'’m-- I'm-- No, I really am--
- All right, we are dismissed, okay?
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- Go inspire those young,
warped minds.
- [murmuring]
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[teacher] I wanna sing the
national anthem this morning.
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Why would they do this to me?
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Grant, can I talk
to you for a second?
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- These are crazy.
- What do you want?
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I'’m thinking it might be good
if you unpair Harry and I
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for this homecoming dance thing.
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- Why?
- I can'’t tell you why,
but just trust me.
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I mean, I can unpair you,
but I'’ll need a clear reason.
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Otherwise, it'’ll
look like homophobia.
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How'’s it gonna
look like homophobia?
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If I separate two gay men,
isn'’t that homophobia?
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I can see the logic.
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Some of these kids
could get into Parsons.
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It'’s really beautiful work.
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Can you just--
I-- I think-- Just unpair us.
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- It'’s-- It'll be good.
- No, Evan.
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Just do your job. Stop creating
drama where there is none.
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Just plan the-- plan
the homecoming dance.
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Go.
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[sighs]
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00:04:04,899 --> 00:04:06,556
This horse will do.
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Rick, I found a winner.
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Okay. So,
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how much do we think
the author is writing
based on his own experiences?
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Do it. Just say something.
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Chelsea, what'’s going on?
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00:04:15,945 --> 00:04:18,913
Um, Mr. Marquez,
I'’m sorry to interrupt class,
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but it'’s actually
super triggering for me
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to be reading a book
about a disease right now
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with everything
I'’m going through.
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Because of everything
you'’re going through?
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What are you
going through, Kayla?
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The rest of the class sort of
already knows about this.
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- But recently...
- [students] Mmm.
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...I was
successfully diagnosed...
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[sniffles]
...with something called...
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You'’re doing great, Kayla.
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- [Jason] It'’s okay.
- Be present with
your illness, okay?
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- Asymptomatic Tourette'’s.
- [Evan groans]
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- What?
- So what Tourette'’s syndrome is,
right--
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00:04:52,568 --> 00:04:54,432
No, I know what
Tourette'’s syndrome is.
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00:04:54,432 --> 00:04:56,606
Oh, great. Okay. So it sounds
like you'’re halfway there,
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00:04:56,606 --> 00:05:01,128
and you'’re taking an opportunity
to be educated,
which is honorable.
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00:05:01,128 --> 00:05:03,613
- Thank you.
- So, asymptomatic Tourette'’s, right?
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00:05:03,613 --> 00:05:07,893
It'’s like Tourette's syndrome
with the tics and, like,
the hardship, right?
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00:05:07,893 --> 00:05:11,138
But without any symptoms.
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00:05:11,138 --> 00:05:14,003
So in its way, AT is harder.
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00:05:14,003 --> 00:05:15,384
- Because--
- What is AT?
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00:05:15,384 --> 00:05:17,558
Oh, asymptomatic
Tourette'’s. Okay.
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00:05:17,558 --> 00:05:19,319
- Uh-huh.
- It is harder.
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00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:21,942
Because people have, like,
actually no idea
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00:05:21,942 --> 00:05:26,636
the battle
that people like Kayla
are fighting inside every day.
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It'’s a silent killer.
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And someone actually
diagnosed you with this?
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- It'’s disrespectful to ask that.
[whispers] I'’m so sorry--
- [Kayla] It'’s okay.
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00:05:34,264 --> 00:05:37,026
You can'’t blame people
for making really huge mistakes
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00:05:37,026 --> 00:05:39,511
when they haven'’t
learned the etiquette.
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It'’s only self-diagnosable.
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I see.
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00:05:45,517 --> 00:05:48,071
- [bell rings]
- She'’s making up
this whole fake disease.
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00:05:48,071 --> 00:05:50,729
She'’s describing the symptoms.
There aren'’t any symptoms.
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00:05:50,729 --> 00:05:52,973
She'’s calling it
asymptomatic Tourette'’s.
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00:05:52,973 --> 00:05:54,664
I feel like I'’ve
never related to you more
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00:05:54,664 --> 00:05:58,219
about these kids
just making up crazy shit
for their own benefit.
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It'’s insane.
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00:05:59,566 --> 00:06:02,569
Have you done a full
and comprehensive diagnostic
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00:06:02,569 --> 00:06:05,882
to see if there'’s any
potential underlying symptoms?
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00:06:05,882 --> 00:06:07,436
I'’m not a doctor,
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00:06:07,436 --> 00:06:08,954
but I don'’t have to be a doctor
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00:06:08,954 --> 00:06:10,853
to know that this girl
is making something up.
155
00:06:10,853 --> 00:06:12,648
Tell you what, I'’ll come
by your classroom tomorrow.
156
00:06:12,648 --> 00:06:16,376
- Get a firsthand assessment
of her condition.
- You'’re not a doctor.
157
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:19,068
Two and a half more
credits in kinesiology,
and I would'’ve been a doctor.
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[Evan] Okay.
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00:06:22,934 --> 00:06:24,384
So then the blue streamers
the school has.
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00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:25,764
I have to buy gold streamers.
161
00:06:25,764 --> 00:06:28,560
And then there'’s a ladder
I think in the utility closet.
162
00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:30,390
Yeah, it'’s
basically that. Right?
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00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:34,980
[chuckles]
Wow, I did not realize
that we had, like, an agenda.
164
00:06:34,980 --> 00:06:39,537
Oh, yeah. The-- The--
I just, um, have to get home
to grade all these papers.
165
00:06:39,537 --> 00:06:42,056
Yeah, okay.
Blue and gold streamers it is.
166
00:06:43,126 --> 00:06:45,646
Ugh. Oh, my God.
I'’m sorry that took so long.
167
00:06:45,646 --> 00:06:49,374
One of the managers was, like,
low-key sexually harassing me
in the back.
168
00:06:49,374 --> 00:06:52,515
[chuckles] I'’m sorry to
ask this, are you guys gay?
169
00:06:52,515 --> 00:06:53,792
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
- Mmm. Yeah.
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00:06:53,792 --> 00:06:55,207
[waiter] My people. Thank God.
171
00:06:55,207 --> 00:06:56,450
When you walked in,
I clocked you,
172
00:06:56,450 --> 00:06:57,969
and I was like, "Hey, sister."
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00:06:57,969 --> 00:07:01,248
And it'’s, like, the
community in Austin is amazing,
174
00:07:01,248 --> 00:07:03,664
but, like, I keep trying
to reach out to people,
175
00:07:03,664 --> 00:07:06,564
and they'’re like,
"You'’re toxic,"
or "I'’m busy," and I'm like,
176
00:07:06,564 --> 00:07:08,876
"Babe, I have zero friends."
177
00:07:08,876 --> 00:07:10,360
I moved here from Michigan.
178
00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:14,088
So, my dears, what can I get
you two lovebirds for din-din?
179
00:07:14,088 --> 00:07:16,919
Oh. Sorry. We'’re not lovebirds.
We just work together.
[chuckles]
180
00:07:16,919 --> 00:07:18,092
Oh, my God.
181
00:07:18,092 --> 00:07:20,992
I think maybe we need
a little bit more time.
182
00:07:20,992 --> 00:07:22,545
[waiter] No sweat.
183
00:07:22,545 --> 00:07:26,204
Uh, if you need anything,
holler "Clarkson."
My name'’s Daniel.
184
00:07:26,204 --> 00:07:29,241
So I'’m-- I'm realizing actually
I can do a lot of this alone.
185
00:07:29,241 --> 00:07:32,417
So I might just head home,
and, uh, I'’ll get my food to go.
186
00:07:32,417 --> 00:07:34,730
Hey, but, okay,
we'’re here though.
187
00:07:34,730 --> 00:07:38,285
And I just got my wine, so...
188
00:07:38,285 --> 00:07:41,702
Look, I get it.
This committee shit.
It'’s annoying.
189
00:07:41,702 --> 00:07:45,085
But, like, let'’s just, you know,
have some fun with it.
190
00:07:45,085 --> 00:07:46,776
[whispers] Okay. That'’s fine.
191
00:07:46,776 --> 00:07:50,435
Oh, I have a few ideas
for the playlist,
if you want to talk about that?
192
00:07:50,435 --> 00:07:52,230
Don'’t the kids do the music?
193
00:07:52,230 --> 00:07:54,439
Yeah, see, I don'’t think
that'’s a good idea, right?
194
00:07:54,439 --> 00:07:58,167
Because at my last school,
we let a kid deejay the prom,
195
00:07:58,167 --> 00:08:02,274
and then he tried to play
an entire episode
of Dax Shepard'’s podcast.
196
00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:03,690
- Which episode?
- Oh.
197
00:08:03,690 --> 00:08:06,175
I'’ve actually been super
into this song lately.
198
00:08:06,175 --> 00:08:08,695
I-- I'’ll just play it for you.
199
00:08:13,527 --> 00:08:15,080
["Eternal Flame" playing]
200
00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:16,461
[sighs] Oh, my God.
201
00:08:16,461 --> 00:08:21,535
♪ Close your eyes
Give me your hand, darling ♪
202
00:08:21,535 --> 00:08:27,576
♪ Do you feel
My heart beating?
Do you understand?♪
203
00:08:27,576 --> 00:08:31,338
♪ Do you feel the same... ♪
204
00:08:31,338 --> 00:08:33,478
Are you fucking kidding?
You come to my favorite
restaurant?
205
00:08:33,478 --> 00:08:35,549
I'’m six months pregnant,
you bitch.
206
00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:36,964
- Malcolm.
- [chuckles] I'’m kidding.
207
00:08:36,964 --> 00:08:39,001
- What the fuck
are you doing here?
- Hey, babe. Come here.
208
00:08:39,001 --> 00:08:40,658
- Hi.
- Hi.
209
00:08:40,658 --> 00:08:41,969
- Ah, that'’s--
- Miss you.
210
00:08:41,969 --> 00:08:43,764
Sorry. Malcolm, this is Harry.
211
00:08:43,764 --> 00:08:46,042
He works at Morrison now.
Harry, this is Malcolm.
212
00:08:46,042 --> 00:08:47,837
- He used to work
at Morrison, but--
- Yes. Yes.
213
00:08:47,837 --> 00:08:49,494
I used to work at Morrison.
214
00:08:49,494 --> 00:08:51,082
Until I got fired
for fucking him.
215
00:08:51,082 --> 00:08:52,393
That is not what happened.
216
00:08:52,393 --> 00:08:55,120
Yeah, we had sex.
Penetrative. Top. Bottom.
217
00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:57,260
- That is really
not what happened.
- And I got fired.
218
00:08:57,260 --> 00:08:59,090
He was-- He'’s my ex-boyfriend,
and now I'’m single.
219
00:08:59,090 --> 00:09:02,231
Which I like.
I like being single,
and I don'’t want to have a--
220
00:09:02,231 --> 00:09:04,647
I'’m not-- I'm not
open to relationships.
221
00:09:04,647 --> 00:09:07,339
- [laughs] Okay.
High-strung tonight.
- [Harry] Mm-hmm.
222
00:09:07,339 --> 00:09:09,307
- Is he being weird on your date?
- [Evan] It'’s not a date.
223
00:09:09,307 --> 00:09:12,344
Um, hey, did-- did the
waiter ask you if you were gay?
224
00:09:12,344 --> 00:09:14,312
No. I guess I give
off, like, a masc vibe.
225
00:09:14,312 --> 00:09:16,659
Sometimes I wish
I was more femme like you guys.
226
00:09:16,659 --> 00:09:20,007
I'’ve tried to be femme
for clout. It just doesn'’t
come naturally to me.
227
00:09:20,007 --> 00:09:21,319
I-I-- You'’re leaving.
228
00:09:21,319 --> 00:09:22,596
Do I have to?
229
00:09:22,596 --> 00:09:24,391
- I could stay and hang out.
- No, you'’re leaving.
230
00:09:24,391 --> 00:09:26,151
I'’m gonna leave
with you. I have to go.
231
00:09:26,151 --> 00:09:27,877
I just-- He can give me a ride.
232
00:09:27,877 --> 00:09:30,224
- I can give him a ride.
- A ride to your car?
233
00:09:30,224 --> 00:09:32,537
A ride to my car,
exactly. Yeah, so...
234
00:09:32,537 --> 00:09:35,851
- Hey, nice to meet you.
- Great work.
And I-I will see you at work.
235
00:09:35,851 --> 00:09:38,025
- You too. Asante.[chuckles]
- Um...
236
00:09:38,025 --> 00:09:39,130
Thanks so much. Okay.
237
00:09:39,130 --> 00:09:41,408
- Whoo! We did it.
- [Malcolm] He'’s hot.
238
00:09:42,858 --> 00:09:43,893
[sighs]
239
00:09:45,826 --> 00:09:47,517
I literally have COVID.
240
00:09:48,553 --> 00:09:49,899
He'’s hot, huh?
241
00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:51,625
- Harry.
- [chuckles]
242
00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:53,006
My God.
243
00:09:53,006 --> 00:09:55,077
I can'’t believe Grant found
the second-hottest gay guy
244
00:09:55,077 --> 00:09:56,596
in Austin to replace me.
245
00:09:58,287 --> 00:10:01,014
It'’s just this whole thing
because he'’s into me,
246
00:10:01,014 --> 00:10:03,913
and he'’s like-- I can tell
he'’s trying to make a move.
247
00:10:03,913 --> 00:10:05,225
[laughs]
248
00:10:05,225 --> 00:10:06,329
Really?
249
00:10:06,329 --> 00:10:07,572
- Yeah.
- He'’s into you?
250
00:10:07,572 --> 00:10:08,815
I didn'’t get that vibe at all.
251
00:10:08,815 --> 00:10:10,195
- Malcolm.
- I truly didn'’t.
252
00:10:10,195 --> 00:10:14,648
He literally played a gorgeous
song like this on his phone.
253
00:10:14,648 --> 00:10:16,408
So we had to smoosh
our faces together.
254
00:10:16,408 --> 00:10:19,273
But that doesn'’t mean anything.
I mean, I-- People do that
all the time.
255
00:10:19,273 --> 00:10:22,449
People play music
for each other. It'’s,
like, not really a big deal.
256
00:10:22,449 --> 00:10:24,658
I actually think I was
getting a vibe from him.
257
00:10:24,658 --> 00:10:29,283
He looked at me, and it
kind of gave like, "Let'’s kiss
and also fuck. Right now."
258
00:10:29,283 --> 00:10:30,699
Oh, my God.
259
00:10:30,699 --> 00:10:32,735
Oh! You'’re jealous.
260
00:10:32,735 --> 00:10:35,082
I like that.
More of that face, please.
261
00:10:35,082 --> 00:10:37,740
It'’s the most boyfriend-y thing
you'’ve done to me in months.
262
00:10:39,777 --> 00:10:43,815
Hey, guys, before we
get started today here--
Settle down, settle down.
263
00:10:43,815 --> 00:10:47,716
Um, before class starts today,
I would like to
take some ownership
264
00:10:47,716 --> 00:10:52,306
and say a few words
about AT, also known as
asymptomatic Tourette'’s.
265
00:10:52,306 --> 00:10:53,963
[students sigh] Come on.
266
00:10:53,963 --> 00:10:56,517
- Uh-huh, Chelsea. Yes.
- It'’s not called AT anymore.
267
00:10:56,517 --> 00:10:58,416
That'’s actually
super disrespectful.
268
00:10:58,416 --> 00:11:00,556
Oh. What is it called now?
269
00:11:00,556 --> 00:11:03,559
KS. It stands
for Kayla Syndrome.
270
00:11:03,559 --> 00:11:06,700
It'’s named as
an "in memoriam" to Kayla.
271
00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,875
- Deirdre, I think
you mean a tribute.
- No.
272
00:11:08,875 --> 00:11:11,463
- Okay.
- Are you getting that? Does
that make sense to you, sir?
273
00:11:11,463 --> 00:11:12,948
Oh, so it'’s named after Kayla.
274
00:11:12,948 --> 00:11:14,363
Okay. That'’s cool.
275
00:11:14,363 --> 00:11:16,399
It'’s actually not cool.
Are you seeing this girl?
276
00:11:16,399 --> 00:11:17,607
- She'’s sick as a dog.
- [Evan] Yeah.
277
00:11:17,607 --> 00:11:19,609
Well, I apologize, Kayla.
278
00:11:19,609 --> 00:11:21,163
I'’m sorry that you
have Kayla Syndrome.
279
00:11:21,163 --> 00:11:23,993
So it'’s actually better
if you just call it KS.
280
00:11:23,993 --> 00:11:25,685
- Okay.
- Because it'’s super triggering
281
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:27,445
- for Kayla to hear
her own name...
- Absolutely.
282
00:11:27,445 --> 00:11:28,791
- ...brought up in that context.
- Gotcha.
283
00:11:28,791 --> 00:11:31,276
- Makes sense.
- You know, part of me wonders...
284
00:11:34,003 --> 00:11:36,143
You-- You have something to say?
285
00:11:36,143 --> 00:11:37,248
Say it. Just say it.
286
00:11:38,836 --> 00:11:41,424
- Coach Hillridge, do
you have any thoughts?
- I'’m just here to listen.
287
00:11:41,424 --> 00:11:43,564
- That'’s why you the man.
- Thank you, Coach Hillridge.
288
00:11:43,564 --> 00:11:44,669
That means a lot.
289
00:11:44,669 --> 00:11:46,188
You'’re welcome, Kayla.
290
00:11:46,188 --> 00:11:47,327
[Chelsea] Yes. Thank you, sir.
291
00:11:47,327 --> 00:11:49,605
[Markie]
Chelsea, you'’re welcome.
292
00:11:49,605 --> 00:11:52,297
- Did anybody do the homework?
- [students] No.
293
00:11:52,297 --> 00:11:54,161
- We'’ve all been
dealing with this.
- [Evan] Right.
294
00:11:54,161 --> 00:11:57,647
You'’re all getting
your medical degrees.
295
00:11:57,647 --> 00:11:59,719
[bell rings]
296
00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:01,203
- Have a good one, Jake.
- All right.
297
00:12:01,203 --> 00:12:04,137
So after witnessing that,
do you still think AT is--
298
00:12:04,137 --> 00:12:06,484
- [Markie] KS.
- KS. You still think
it'’s a real disease?
299
00:12:06,484 --> 00:12:08,417
Look, it'’s
actually quite simple.
300
00:12:08,417 --> 00:12:11,627
Kayla and Chelsea, best friends
since freshman year, right?
301
00:12:11,627 --> 00:12:13,940
- Side by side,
socially speaking.
- Uh-huh.
302
00:12:13,940 --> 00:12:16,908
Last month, Chelsea'’s out for a
couple of weeks. Remember that?
303
00:12:16,908 --> 00:12:19,221
The whole time she'’s gone,
all Kayla could hear is,
304
00:12:19,221 --> 00:12:21,879
"Where'’s Chelsea? Is Chelsea
gonna be out for much longer?"
305
00:12:21,879 --> 00:12:24,571
So then Kayla'’s getting jealous,
and she comes up with--
306
00:12:24,571 --> 00:12:26,711
[Markie]
Asymptomatic Tourette'’s.
307
00:12:26,711 --> 00:12:29,300
And it worked for a time.
308
00:12:29,300 --> 00:12:33,856
But then Chelsea starts
rallying everyone to be
super supportive of Kayla.
309
00:12:33,856 --> 00:12:35,237
And what does that do?
310
00:12:35,237 --> 00:12:39,620
Makes everybody talk about how
great and caring Chelsea is.
311
00:12:39,620 --> 00:12:44,522
Chelsea did the same thing
to Renee last year, and Renee
is still not back at 100%.
312
00:12:44,522 --> 00:12:46,904
- You know what I'’m saying?
- [stammers] Who'’s Renee?
313
00:12:46,904 --> 00:12:50,045
Come on, man. She goes by
Deirdre in the classroom,
Renee in the friend group.
314
00:12:50,045 --> 00:12:51,736
Keep up, Marquez.
315
00:12:51,736 --> 00:12:53,255
It'’s just so much information.
316
00:12:53,255 --> 00:12:55,844
But that'’s beside the point.
It brings us to today.
317
00:12:55,844 --> 00:12:58,260
The events of what happened
here in your classroom.
318
00:12:58,260 --> 00:13:00,020
Who speaks up
on Kayla'’s behalf?
319
00:13:00,020 --> 00:13:03,058
Who started making sure
everyone was sympathetic
320
00:13:03,058 --> 00:13:05,370
to the journey
that Kayla was on?
321
00:13:05,370 --> 00:13:07,338
Who renamed the goddamn disease?
322
00:13:07,338 --> 00:13:08,926
Chelsea.
323
00:13:08,926 --> 00:13:14,069
Kayla'’s whole gambit
to gain sympathy
has turned into nothing more
324
00:13:14,069 --> 00:13:19,729
than a vehicle for
Chelsea'’s rapid ascent to
the upper echelon of popularity.
325
00:13:19,729 --> 00:13:21,283
[exhales sharply]
326
00:13:21,283 --> 00:13:23,837
That'’s crazy. You got all this
from 20 minutes in my classroom?
327
00:13:23,837 --> 00:13:25,080
[snorts]
328
00:13:25,080 --> 00:13:26,391
I only needed ten.
329
00:13:29,947 --> 00:13:33,088
♪ I'’ve fallen in love
And there'’s no...♪
330
00:13:33,088 --> 00:13:37,230
You know, I have to say,
you are the hottest man
I'’ve ever met.
331
00:13:37,230 --> 00:13:38,714
[laughs] Stop.
332
00:13:38,714 --> 00:13:40,958
What'’d you think
of my dick in the locker room?
333
00:13:40,958 --> 00:13:43,063
I loved it.
334
00:13:43,063 --> 00:13:45,859
I knew you wanted me to see it,
but Gwen thought--
335
00:13:45,859 --> 00:13:47,654
Well, Gwen was wrong.
336
00:13:47,654 --> 00:13:49,518
And Markie is also wrong.
337
00:13:50,139 --> 00:13:51,244
About everything.
338
00:13:51,244 --> 00:13:52,486
I know.
339
00:13:52,486 --> 00:13:54,730
♪ You got the touch ♪
340
00:13:54,730 --> 00:13:55,973
- [honking]
- [grunts]
341
00:13:55,973 --> 00:13:57,975
[tires squeal]
342
00:13:57,975 --> 00:13:59,873
- [tires squealing]
- [cell phone ringing]
343
00:13:59,873 --> 00:14:03,532
[sighs]
Evan, I'’m trying to take a nap.
So it better be important.
344
00:14:03,532 --> 00:14:06,673
It is. Listen, to put it simply,
Harry'’s extremely into me. Okay?
345
00:14:06,673 --> 00:14:08,813
And I know I'’m not allowed
to date other teachers,
346
00:14:08,813 --> 00:14:10,677
and I think he'’s gonna try
to do something about it.
347
00:14:10,677 --> 00:14:12,334
And I'’m trying to avoid it,
but it could happen.
348
00:14:12,334 --> 00:14:14,198
Somebody who looks like Harry
would not be into you.
349
00:14:14,198 --> 00:14:15,682
- This is not a problem.
- You don'’t get it.
350
00:14:15,682 --> 00:14:17,787
We were in the
locker room the other day,
351
00:14:17,787 --> 00:14:20,618
and he takes off his towel
in front of me on purpose.
352
00:14:20,618 --> 00:14:23,310
He showed me his
incredible ass and dick.
353
00:14:23,310 --> 00:14:26,727
- No. Stop it. Stop it, Evan.
- I was exhausted
just by the fantasies...
354
00:14:26,727 --> 00:14:29,040
- ...that came just from
seeing it initially.
- Evan. Evan. Stop.
355
00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:31,249
- We did not have
this conversation.
- We had this conversation.
356
00:14:31,249 --> 00:14:32,975
- I'’ll see you at the dance.
- I am hot.
357
00:14:32,975 --> 00:14:35,391
I am considered hot
in my community, okay?
358
00:14:35,391 --> 00:14:38,015
I don'’t care if you all think
I'’m basic-looking.
359
00:14:38,015 --> 00:14:39,499
I'’m an attractive gay guy.
360
00:14:39,499 --> 00:14:42,985
♪ You got the touch of love ♪
361
00:14:42,985 --> 00:14:48,335
♪ And I just
Can'’t get enough ♪
362
00:14:48,335 --> 00:14:50,406
Oh, Evan. This
streamer just ripped.
363
00:14:50,406 --> 00:14:51,752
Will you hold the ladder?
364
00:14:51,752 --> 00:14:53,720
You don'’t need me
to hold the ladder, Harry.
365
00:14:53,720 --> 00:14:55,204
I have to make more punch.
366
00:14:55,998 --> 00:14:57,551
Okay.
367
00:14:57,551 --> 00:15:00,071
Ashley, your mom
did such a good job
with those sugar cookies.
368
00:15:00,071 --> 00:15:01,417
I love them.
369
00:15:02,487 --> 00:15:04,144
- God, he looks so good tonight.
- Hey.
370
00:15:04,144 --> 00:15:07,009
But I don'’t care
how hard he tries.
371
00:15:07,009 --> 00:15:08,873
Nothing is gonna
happen between us.
372
00:15:08,873 --> 00:15:12,221
Is it possible... [sucks teeth]
373
00:15:12,221 --> 00:15:14,672
...he'’s maybe not trying
to make something happen?
374
00:15:14,672 --> 00:15:18,227
You know, like,
you'’re very handsome and--
[stammers] You'’re so handsome.
375
00:15:18,227 --> 00:15:20,712
But maybe you'’re
just reading into it.
376
00:15:23,025 --> 00:15:24,924
No, it feels unmistakable.
377
00:15:27,409 --> 00:15:29,342
Sorry. Um, Evan,
378
00:15:29,342 --> 00:15:31,689
could I speak to
you outside for a second?
379
00:15:32,483 --> 00:15:33,553
Sure.
380
00:15:38,316 --> 00:15:39,939
- [student 1] Sorry.
- [student 2] Evening, sir.
381
00:15:43,252 --> 00:15:44,288
[exhales sharply]
382
00:15:46,152 --> 00:15:47,843
- [Harry] Um...
- [sighs]
383
00:15:49,258 --> 00:15:52,054
Did I do
something to offend you?
384
00:15:52,813 --> 00:15:54,954
No. Of course not.
385
00:15:56,541 --> 00:15:57,922
Uh-huh. Because you...
[stammers]
386
00:15:59,372 --> 00:16:03,548
...you'’ve been acting
very weird with me all week.
387
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:06,862
I'’m-- I'm--
388
00:16:06,862 --> 00:16:09,106
Harry, I'’m being weird
because if something happened
between us,
389
00:16:09,106 --> 00:16:10,935
it would be very
catastrophic for my life.
390
00:16:10,935 --> 00:16:13,420
Okay?
I think you know this already.
I'’m not allowed to date teachers
391
00:16:13,420 --> 00:16:15,733
because of a very specific
situation in my life.
392
00:16:15,733 --> 00:16:20,393
So if something happens
between you and I, you know,
i-it'’s not gonna be good.
393
00:16:20,393 --> 00:16:22,878
You wanna fuck me.
I wanna fuck you. I get it.
394
00:16:22,878 --> 00:16:26,261
This is clear as day, but
it'’s gonna go beyond that, okay?
395
00:16:26,261 --> 00:16:27,883
We'’re gonna wanna
start dating each other.
396
00:16:27,883 --> 00:16:29,989
We'’re probably potentially
gonna wanna get married.
397
00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:32,060
Then, what happens?
One of us is gonna quit?
398
00:16:32,060 --> 00:16:34,786
I can'’t just report
this marriage to the board.
399
00:16:34,786 --> 00:16:36,443
One of us is gonna
have to quit the job.
400
00:16:36,443 --> 00:16:39,032
And so that'’s--
that'’s where I draw the line.
401
00:16:39,032 --> 00:16:40,585
And I don'’t care
how bad you want it.
402
00:16:40,585 --> 00:16:42,484
I don'’t care how bad I want it.
403
00:16:42,484 --> 00:16:46,557
It'’s not happening, okay?
I'’m not throwing away my life
for-- for you.
404
00:16:46,557 --> 00:16:49,836
For-- For whatever this thing is
that you'’re imagining
that we have together.
405
00:16:49,836 --> 00:16:52,287
Evan, take a breath.
406
00:16:52,287 --> 00:16:56,981
- [breathes sharply]
- Um, first of all,
I-I have a boyfriend.
407
00:16:58,500 --> 00:17:01,434
- I'’m-- It's-- It'’s not even--
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
408
00:17:01,434 --> 00:17:03,539
No, no, no.
It'’s okay. I do this.
409
00:17:03,539 --> 00:17:05,265
- This is something
I do, actually.
- No, it'’s--
410
00:17:05,265 --> 00:17:07,198
I think people are into me
when they'’re not into me.
411
00:17:07,198 --> 00:17:10,512
And I think I'’m, like--
I have this, like, inflated
sense of my own attractiveness.
412
00:17:10,512 --> 00:17:12,410
And I think I'’m,
like, this hunky guy.
413
00:17:12,410 --> 00:17:15,103
And then I get really attracted
to really good-looking guys.
414
00:17:15,103 --> 00:17:17,484
And then I find out they were
never thinking of me like that.
415
00:17:17,484 --> 00:17:19,383
- I have a funny-looking face.
- Evan. Evan.
416
00:17:19,383 --> 00:17:21,109
If you would let me
talk for a second--
417
00:17:21,109 --> 00:17:22,627
Is this Kayla Syndrome?
418
00:17:22,627 --> 00:17:24,353
No, it'’s-- I'm sorry.
That'’s so stupid.
419
00:17:24,353 --> 00:17:25,975
I-- There-- Yes.
420
00:17:25,975 --> 00:17:28,012
We can just be coworkers.
I really appreciate it.
I'’m sorry.
421
00:17:28,012 --> 00:17:30,463
- Evan.
- I'’m serious.
You don'’t need to save me.
422
00:17:30,463 --> 00:17:32,051
I'’m fine. Thank you.
423
00:17:37,884 --> 00:17:39,644
[feedback]
424
00:17:39,644 --> 00:17:42,785
Hello. Hello.
Hey, hello, everyone.
Gather around, gather around.
425
00:17:42,785 --> 00:17:45,719
Oh, God. I just had the weirdest
interaction with Harry. [sighs]
426
00:17:45,719 --> 00:17:47,721
He'’s not into me.
You were so right.
427
00:17:47,721 --> 00:17:50,207
- I was just making
the whole thing up.
- That'’s great.
428
00:17:50,207 --> 00:17:52,312
Before we announce
our homecoming court winners,
429
00:17:52,312 --> 00:17:55,729
we will have
a brief presentation
of our new school mascot
430
00:17:55,729 --> 00:17:58,387
designed by the R.C.K. Group.
431
00:17:58,387 --> 00:18:00,907
- All right.
- [chuckles]
432
00:18:00,907 --> 00:18:03,047
- Where da weed at?
- [chuckles]
433
00:18:03,047 --> 00:18:05,049
Nah, I'’m just messing around.
You guys are good kids.
434
00:18:05,049 --> 00:18:09,881
I'’m now excited and thrilled to
present your new school mascot,
435
00:18:09,881 --> 00:18:14,990
- Michael the Horse!
- Oh, Michael.
Not even alliteration.
436
00:18:14,990 --> 00:18:17,096
- Come on!
- [attendees murmuring]
437
00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:19,132
- Let'’s go!
- [attendees groaning]
438
00:18:19,132 --> 00:18:21,445
- [attendees] Boo!
- [attendee 1]
Get the hell off the stage!
439
00:18:21,445 --> 00:18:23,032
Thank you. Thank
you, R.C.K. Group.
440
00:18:23,032 --> 00:18:26,795
I guess we'’ll just
remain "The Dragons"
for the time being.
441
00:18:26,795 --> 00:18:30,902
So now for your homecoming
court queen, Kayla Stephenson.
442
00:18:30,902 --> 00:18:32,525
- [attendees cheering]
- Kayla Stephenson.
443
00:18:32,525 --> 00:18:33,595
[attendee 2] Yeah, Kayla!
444
00:18:35,907 --> 00:18:37,633
[cheering continues]
445
00:18:37,633 --> 00:18:39,359
- Are you crying?
- She did it.
446
00:18:41,327 --> 00:18:44,571
Thank you.
This means the world to me.
447
00:18:44,571 --> 00:18:49,680
But there'’s someone here tonight
who could use this tiara
a whole lot more than me.
448
00:18:50,163 --> 00:18:51,785
Chelsea.
449
00:18:51,785 --> 00:18:54,719
I don'’t care what Thomas
said about you last night.
450
00:18:54,719 --> 00:18:55,927
You'’re the coolest.
451
00:18:55,927 --> 00:18:57,377
This is for you.
452
00:18:57,377 --> 00:18:58,999
[attendees] Aw!
453
00:18:58,999 --> 00:19:00,622
What the hell was that?
454
00:19:00,622 --> 00:19:03,280
I had a little chat with Kayla.
Gave her some sage wisdom.
455
00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:05,040
- What'’d you tell her?
- The truth.
456
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:07,594
The best way to gain power
is to artificially give it away.
457
00:19:07,594 --> 00:19:09,148
- Thank you.
- All right.
458
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:10,287
Congratulations. Both of you.
459
00:19:10,287 --> 00:19:12,910
- So you solved it?
- Yep.
460
00:19:12,910 --> 00:19:15,740
At least until Lauren gets
her Invisalign out. I mean...
461
00:19:15,740 --> 00:19:17,121
Who is Lauren?
462
00:19:17,121 --> 00:19:18,571
Come on, dude.
463
00:19:18,571 --> 00:19:19,917
- You don'’t know who Lauren is?
- Wow.
464
00:19:19,917 --> 00:19:21,746
You guys are
obsessed with the students
465
00:19:21,746 --> 00:19:23,162
in a way that is weird to me.
466
00:19:24,646 --> 00:19:30,238
♪ Close your eyes
Give me your hand, darling...♪
467
00:19:32,585 --> 00:19:33,620
What'’s up?
468
00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:35,174
Um.
469
00:19:36,451 --> 00:19:38,107
You kind of just left
470
00:19:38,107 --> 00:19:40,489
before we had a chance
to finish our conversation.
471
00:19:41,732 --> 00:19:42,940
I did?
472
00:19:43,561 --> 00:19:44,873
Yeah.
473
00:19:46,702 --> 00:19:48,808
[chuckles] Yeah. I guess
I felt like I was, like...
474
00:19:48,808 --> 00:19:50,672
[clears throat]
475
00:19:50,672 --> 00:19:54,607
The longer I stayed out there,
the more I was gonna say
insane shit.
476
00:19:54,607 --> 00:19:56,022
[both chuckle]
477
00:19:56,022 --> 00:19:58,404
It'’s probably
the right instinct.
478
00:19:59,922 --> 00:20:01,476
Yeah.
479
00:20:01,476 --> 00:20:03,823
I don'’t know what's
wrong with me sometimes.
480
00:20:03,823 --> 00:20:06,550
Honestly, I kinda liked
seeing you like that.
481
00:20:07,654 --> 00:20:08,690
It was cute.
482
00:20:10,726 --> 00:20:11,762
Really?
483
00:20:12,659 --> 00:20:13,695
Really.
484
00:20:19,804 --> 00:20:20,840
[chuckles]
485
00:20:21,910 --> 00:20:23,532
But you have a boyfriend.
486
00:20:23,532 --> 00:20:25,741
It'’s not the '50s, man.
487
00:20:25,741 --> 00:20:28,192
We'’re open.
488
00:20:28,192 --> 00:20:32,507
- Oh, you'’re open. Of course.
- Yeah. [chuckles]
489
00:20:32,507 --> 00:20:34,647
- Yeah.
- That makes sense.
490
00:20:34,647 --> 00:20:37,719
♪ Or is this burning ♪
491
00:20:37,719 --> 00:20:42,102
♪ An eternal flame? ♪
492
00:20:42,102 --> 00:20:43,656
♪ Close your eyes ♪
493
00:20:43,656 --> 00:20:45,278
- Jesus. Jesus. Jesus.
- [clamoring]
494
00:20:45,278 --> 00:20:46,866
- What the hell, man?
- This was a mistake.
495
00:20:46,866 --> 00:20:48,350
- What wrong with you?
- This was a mistake.
496
00:20:48,350 --> 00:20:52,837
I got caught up in the moment,
and that doesn'’t matter though,
497
00:20:52,837 --> 00:20:56,462
- because that moment
did not even happen.
- [clamoring continues]
498
00:20:57,117 --> 00:20:59,741
Okay. Okay.
499
00:20:59,741 --> 00:21:02,157
So you'’re like crazy, crazy.
500
00:21:02,882 --> 00:21:04,021
Got it.
501
00:21:04,021 --> 00:21:05,264
I'’m gonna leave.
502
00:21:07,231 --> 00:21:09,233
Good. That'’s what
I want you to do.
503
00:21:09,233 --> 00:21:16,205
♪ I can dream about you
If I can'’t hold you tonight ♪
504
00:21:17,862 --> 00:21:24,766
♪ I can dream about you
You know how to hold me
Just right ♪
505
00:21:26,561 --> 00:21:33,464
♪ I can dream about you
You know how to hold me
Just right ♪
506
00:21:33,464 --> 00:21:38,331
♪ Oh, I can dream about you ♪
507
00:21:38,331 --> 00:21:42,301
♪ If I can'’t
Hold you tonight ♪
508
00:21:43,405 --> 00:21:46,788
♪ I can dream about you ♪
509
00:21:46,788 --> 00:21:51,551
♪ Oh, I can dream
I can dream ♪
510
00:21:51,551 --> 00:21:55,037
- ♪ I can dream about you ♪
- ♪ Dream about you ♪
511
00:21:55,037 --> 00:21:58,420
♪ Oh, I can dream about you ♪