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[ "Valse de l'Empereur"
by Johann Strauss playing]
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[♪]
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[♪]
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[♪]
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[♪]
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"The President could sense
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the arrival
of his Chief of Staff
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from the slight breeze
the door makes when opened,
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and the President
wished he would knock,
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and the Chief of Staff thought,
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"I'm not the kind of guy
who knocks and waits,"
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and the President thinks,
"I wish he would wait,"
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but the Chief of Staff
ignores this...
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[Hank, thinking]
Cheese...
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American and feta.
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Tuna.
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Vodka for my office.
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Olives.
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Dried berries...
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Uh, let's stop you there.
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Any comments?
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I loved it.
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[Hank]
That's one "I loved it."
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How about
any constructive criticisms?
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Going once, twice...
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Moving on.
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I mean, you could--
you could say something.
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I've given you
my thoughts before.
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Just have a glance
at your last story
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or the one before that, okay?
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Jen, do you want to read?
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It might spark some discussion
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if you offered something
out loud.
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I don't think so.
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It could.
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[grumbles]
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Could you, please,
just for once, say something?
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Workshops like this are based
on the idea of peer review.
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Guided review.
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I'm trying to guide.
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Jen?
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Professor, I don't mean
to gang up on you,
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but you should know,
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besides calling our names
to read,
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you've barely said anything
in an hour and a half.
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Well, I couldn't help
but notice
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a wandering point of view
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within, basically,
structureless sentences.
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No, my point of view
doesn't wander.
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Well, it switches mid-sentence
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from the President
to the Chief of Staff,
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then back, then back--
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Yeah, on purpose.
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Well, you risk
distancing the reader.
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I happen to think
that risk is worth the reward.
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What's the reward?
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Okay, um...
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the reward is I'm--
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I'm exposing the flow
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of different
collected consciousness.
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You know?
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I'm calling it
ultra-omniscience.
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That's a cool word.
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Did anyone else care
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that the President
and Chief of Staff
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seem to be responding
to each other's thoughts
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without speaking,
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in a way that isn't...
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possible?
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I mean,
I'm just gonna say it again,
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I loved it,
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and you made my shortlist
for the Pulitzer.
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You don't get to make
a short list
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for someone else's award.
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Yeah, look, okay,
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responding
to each other's thoughts,
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it's not a mistake.
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[Hank] It certainly was.
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Let's put aside
the multiple points of view
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and the wandering tense
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and the conversations
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that seem to happen
via telepathy.
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Even put aside
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the Chief of Staff's
necrophilia.
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Okay, well,
then there's no story.
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Do you know what I mean
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when I say
"distance the reader"?
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Of course I do,
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but that's my choice to make,
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as it is every writer's,
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as it was, um, Chaucer's choice,
you know,
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whose writing I actually find
really distancing.
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Yeah, well, less so
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because he was writing
in Middle English,
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and it's a tricky thing,
comparing yourself to Chaucer.
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Yeah, but we don't know
that I'm not the next Chaucer.
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We do know.
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All due respect,
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you would not know.
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All due respect,
a cat would know.
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Your only novel
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isn't even available
at your own campus bookstore.
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You-- you're here.
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You're here.
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The main piece of evidence
is that you are here.
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The fact that you're here
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means you didn't try very hard
in high school,
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or, for whatever reason,
you showed very little promise.
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Did that sound harsh?
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I'll tell you what.
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I'll smile
through the rest of this.
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You are here,
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and even if your presence
at this middling college
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in this sad, forgotten town
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was some bizarre anomaly,
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and you do have
the promise of genius,
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which I'll bet a kidney
that you don't,
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it will never surface.
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I am not a good enough writer
or writing teacher
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to bring it out of you.
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And how do I know that? How?
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Because I, too, am here,
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at Railton College,
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mediocrity's capital.
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Well, you wanted me
to talk more.
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[♪]
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[phone buzzing]
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[Lily] Who is it?
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Work.
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[Lily] Turn it off.
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[phone buzzing]
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Hmm.
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I put that in the recycling
three days ago.
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I didn't realize
you want to save it.
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Save it?
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Oh, no, there's other articles
I want to read in here.
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Um...
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you were working
late last night?
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I mean,
it isn't really working late
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just because it's after
you've gone to sleep.
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Yeah, well,
I'm a college professor,
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so working after 4:00 p.m.
is late.
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Who are you saving now?
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There's this boy named Calvin
who's been acting out.
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Herb thinks
he should be expelled,
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so, anyway,
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we're meeting with his mother
and a teacher--
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[phone buzzing]
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You are very popular
this morning.
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I am.
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Why did you buy
so many bananas?
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They're going to go bad,
you know.
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Just to piss you off.
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[phone buzzing]
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I think you should just keep up
with the solitary misery,
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and, like, don't change a thing.
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Who isn't miserable, huh?
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Being an adult is 80% misery.
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No, I think you're at 80.
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The rest of us
hover around 30 to 40.
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Thirty?
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Nobody is at 30.
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I'm at 30.
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Really?
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Thirty?
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Well, then,
you're unusually happy.
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I don't think that's true.
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[Hank, thinking]
I think we've become
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a bit obsessed with happiness.
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It's a little much.
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What happened to just
getting through the day?
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I wonder
what percentage of misery
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this dude was at.
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It better have been at least 90.
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I need a cushion.
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If people wanted
to be happy so much,
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why does all the evidence
point to the opposite?
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I mean, newspapers, the courts,
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social media...
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The misery industry--
that's huge.
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Billions.
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The happy industry?
[chuckles]
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That's, like, one guy,
who probably lives in Canada,
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breeding unicorns
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and filming them for porn
on the side.
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[students whispering]
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[chuckles]
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Mediocrity's capital?
Really?
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[♪]
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[♪]
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I decided to face you as a man.
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Man to man.
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We're one short.
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I always wanted to be a writer.
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When I was six,
I wrote my first story...
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about Wall Street.
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That tracks.
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When I was 12,
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I wrote my first novel.
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Whenever I get down on myself,
I read it.
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It helps me remember
what I'm meant to do.
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And that I can't do
anything else.
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Bartow?
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I don't think you understand
how hurtful what you said was.
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I was uncareful with my words.
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I'm sorry, Bartow.
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We cool?
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Yeah, we cool.
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I'm just gonna
need that in writing.
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What?
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Your apology,
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I'm just gonna need that
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to be posted to
the school newspaper's website.
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With a signature.
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00:09:51,153 --> 00:09:53,355
Uh, an e-signature
is fine, too.
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Would you accept
an e-middle finger?
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00:10:06,605 --> 00:10:07,946
Dean Rose called for you?
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00:10:08,047 --> 00:10:09,307
- Okay.
- Six times.
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00:10:09,407 --> 00:10:10,709
Uh-huh.
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00:10:10,808 --> 00:10:12,109
Should I try him for you?
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00:10:12,210 --> 00:10:14,231
No.
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00:10:14,330 --> 00:10:15,353
Did you get me yogurt?
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00:10:15,452 --> 00:10:17,454
It's not your yogurt day.
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00:10:19,056 --> 00:10:20,277
Yeah.
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00:10:20,377 --> 00:10:23,259
[ "Jumping Strings"
by Paolo Andriotti playing]
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00:10:26,902 --> 00:10:30,464
[♪]
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00:10:40,992 --> 00:10:43,134
[Gracie] Damnit, Rourke,
don't hide behind humor,
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00:10:43,234 --> 00:10:44,336
as if you could...
229
00:10:44,435 --> 00:10:46,498
[Hank, thinking]
Why do grown-ups bother arguing?
230
00:10:46,598 --> 00:10:47,459
[Paul] Well, I'm smiling.
231
00:10:47,558 --> 00:10:48,859
I have been working...
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00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:50,140
[Hank, thinking]
Haven't we learned
233
00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:51,662
what the advertising world
figured out long ago,
234
00:10:51,762 --> 00:10:53,663
that, after age 49,
235
00:10:53,763 --> 00:10:56,385
we're not changing our minds
about anything?
236
00:10:56,484 --> 00:10:58,467
So, what's in it for people?
237
00:10:58,567 --> 00:11:00,269
A sexual charge?
238
00:11:00,368 --> 00:11:02,109
Actually, that sounds nice.
239
00:11:02,211 --> 00:11:05,753
...that it only finds oxygen
when it's hurting a woman.
240
00:11:05,854 --> 00:11:07,753
It should be
painfully clear to you by now,
241
00:11:07,855 --> 00:11:09,234
your time, sir, it's up.
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00:11:09,336 --> 00:11:11,278
[Emma]
Oh, boy, we're doing this.
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00:11:11,377 --> 00:11:13,240
All right,
let's all be careful here.
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00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:14,681
I'll say anything I want.
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00:11:14,781 --> 00:11:16,682
I can't be canceled,
I have tenure.
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00:11:16,781 --> 00:11:18,323
[Gracie] You're an ass.
247
00:11:18,423 --> 00:11:19,523
This is because of you
248
00:11:19,624 --> 00:11:21,205
and your childish outburst
in class.
249
00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:22,205
[Paul] No, no, no, no, no.
250
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It was inspired by him.
251
00:11:23,988 --> 00:11:25,648
It was my idea.
252
00:11:25,749 --> 00:11:27,130
I want recognition.
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00:11:27,230 --> 00:11:28,451
[speaking in French]
"A partir du moment
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00:11:28,551 --> 00:11:30,252
où l'absurdité est reconnue,
255
00:11:30,353 --> 00:11:31,773
elle devient une passion."
256
00:11:31,874 --> 00:11:33,175
Camus.
It means--
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00:11:33,275 --> 00:11:34,257
Did you not get my email?
258
00:11:34,356 --> 00:11:36,457
I got a lot of emails
this morning.
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00:11:36,557 --> 00:11:38,619
I'll bet you did, Peckerhead.
260
00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:40,099
- [Gracie] Read your email.
- [Hank] Why?
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00:11:40,201 --> 00:11:41,983
Rourke submitted
a new course request
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00:11:42,082 --> 00:11:44,503
to the school website
for public evaluation--
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00:11:44,605 --> 00:11:47,907
"The Accidental Wisdom
of Mediocre Regional Writers".
264
00:11:48,008 --> 00:11:49,509
He put me on the syllabus!
265
00:11:49,608 --> 00:11:51,609
Are you not regional?
266
00:11:53,291 --> 00:11:55,433
Your choice to insult us all,
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00:11:55,532 --> 00:11:57,875
especially in an open forum,
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00:11:57,974 --> 00:11:59,277
it's simply incorrect.
269
00:11:59,377 --> 00:12:01,077
We have no shortage
of worthy scholars
270
00:12:01,176 --> 00:12:02,079
and published authors.
271
00:12:02,178 --> 00:12:03,079
[Hank] Name one.
272
00:12:03,180 --> 00:12:04,040
I'll name two--
273
00:12:04,140 --> 00:12:06,163
myself...
274
00:12:06,262 --> 00:12:08,263
and perhaps Billie.
275
00:12:08,744 --> 00:12:10,165
My book of sonnets
on Jonathan Swift
276
00:12:10,265 --> 00:12:12,567
has become the benchmark
277
00:12:12,667 --> 00:12:15,050
in early-feminist,
18th-century response poetry.
278
00:12:15,149 --> 00:12:17,171
You are deliberately trying
279
00:12:17,271 --> 00:12:18,692
to invalidate
the last decade of my career.
280
00:12:18,792 --> 00:12:19,813
[Paul] Decade?
281
00:12:19,913 --> 00:12:22,336
That book came out
25 years ago,
282
00:12:22,435 --> 00:12:23,936
and I remember it distinctly,
283
00:12:24,037 --> 00:12:25,979
because the first email
I ever got
284
00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:28,339
was a bill mistakenly sent
from your self-publisher.
285
00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:30,942
Nobody was brave enough
to publish that book.
286
00:12:31,042 --> 00:12:32,303
It was ahead of its time.
287
00:12:32,403 --> 00:12:33,384
Maybe you should have waited.
288
00:12:33,484 --> 00:12:34,586
- You--
- Ow!
289
00:12:34,685 --> 00:12:36,787
Oh, shit! Shit.
290
00:12:36,887 --> 00:12:38,888
Let go of the notebook.
291
00:12:39,448 --> 00:12:41,390
But it has original work in it.
292
00:12:41,490 --> 00:12:42,871
Not if it's yours.
293
00:12:42,971 --> 00:12:43,792
- You--
- Ow!
294
00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:45,874
Oh!
295
00:12:45,974 --> 00:12:47,234
- Ew!
- [Gracie] Oh, god, I'm sorry.
296
00:12:47,336 --> 00:12:48,436
I...
297
00:12:48,537 --> 00:12:51,079
I-I...
298
00:12:51,178 --> 00:12:52,560
I-I didn't--
I didn't mean to.
299
00:12:52,659 --> 00:12:53,640
I... Are you...?
300
00:12:53,740 --> 00:12:55,080
Going to sue?
301
00:12:55,182 --> 00:12:58,204
Yes! I want every penny
from the sale of those poems.
302
00:12:58,305 --> 00:13:01,086
You can put all of them
in this tiny pocket.
303
00:13:01,186 --> 00:13:03,528
[ "Yulelé"
by Eduardo Mateo playing]
304
00:13:03,628 --> 00:13:06,211
Jill from Jacob Rose's office
called again?
305
00:13:06,310 --> 00:13:07,851
Dean Rose would like
to see you right away?
306
00:13:07,951 --> 00:13:09,574
Tell them I have a class.
307
00:13:09,673 --> 00:13:11,095
I said that?
308
00:13:11,194 --> 00:13:12,734
She said right after class?
309
00:13:12,836 --> 00:13:14,738
Oh. Then I have another class.
310
00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:16,499
Then I said that?
311
00:13:16,598 --> 00:13:17,980
Then she said
312
00:13:18,080 --> 00:13:20,080
that it better not be
racquetball with Tony?
313
00:13:21,242 --> 00:13:22,463
And then I said,
314
00:13:22,563 --> 00:13:23,984
"Have you ever been asked
to cover for your boss
315
00:13:24,086 --> 00:13:25,105
when he was doing something
316
00:13:25,205 --> 00:13:26,988
he didn't want
people to know about?"
317
00:13:27,087 --> 00:13:29,089
Then she got real quiet.
318
00:13:32,772 --> 00:13:33,993
Hey, Daniel.
319
00:13:34,094 --> 00:13:36,596
I hope you brought
enough vape pens for everyone.
320
00:13:36,695 --> 00:13:37,557
[rapid footsteps approaching]
321
00:13:37,656 --> 00:13:39,236
Did you just run?
322
00:13:39,338 --> 00:13:40,438
[exhales]
323
00:13:40,539 --> 00:13:42,040
Are you ready to handle
this Calvin situation?
324
00:13:42,139 --> 00:13:45,062
You shouldn't be so excited
about expelling a kid.
325
00:13:47,784 --> 00:13:49,966
He disrupts my class,
he throws things--
326
00:13:50,067 --> 00:13:51,486
Don't talk about
how disruptive my son is
327
00:13:51,588 --> 00:13:53,448
when it's your job
to control your class.
328
00:13:53,549 --> 00:13:56,091
No. It's my job to teach,
329
00:13:56,192 --> 00:13:57,533
and I can't do my job
330
00:13:57,632 --> 00:13:59,694
if I'm spending 80% of my energy
trying to control her kid--
331
00:13:59,794 --> 00:14:02,015
Do you know that most chocolate
has vegetable oil in it?
332
00:14:02,117 --> 00:14:03,898
Or even animal fat?
333
00:14:03,996 --> 00:14:05,539
Lily, please.
334
00:14:05,638 --> 00:14:06,600
Look, we're here
to talk about Calvin
335
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:07,620
and what to do
336
00:14:07,721 --> 00:14:08,682
at this important juncture
in his life,
337
00:14:08,682 --> 00:14:10,342
but first, just hear me out.
338
00:14:10,443 --> 00:14:13,185
France regulates chocolate.
339
00:14:13,284 --> 00:14:15,788
They don't allow anything
but pure cocoa liquor,
340
00:14:15,887 --> 00:14:18,469
which is what gives chocolate
its rich, delicious flavor.
341
00:14:18,569 --> 00:14:20,350
France, by law,
342
00:14:20,451 --> 00:14:23,033
says that there must be
at least 40%,
343
00:14:23,134 --> 00:14:24,154
but that's not nearly
good enough
344
00:14:24,254 --> 00:14:26,255
for La Maison du Chocolat.
345
00:14:26,857 --> 00:14:29,717
This was flown in
from France last week,
346
00:14:29,819 --> 00:14:31,821
and I'd like to share
some of it with you.
347
00:14:37,784 --> 00:14:39,046
Before you eat it,
348
00:14:39,146 --> 00:14:41,187
I want you to, um,
feel it in your hand.
349
00:14:42,629 --> 00:14:44,630
Just, like,
feel the weight of it.
350
00:14:45,110 --> 00:14:46,773
And then,
place it on your tongue,
351
00:14:46,871 --> 00:14:48,873
and keep it there.
352
00:14:50,435 --> 00:14:52,536
Let it melt in your mouth.
353
00:14:52,636 --> 00:14:54,658
It's amazing, right?
354
00:14:54,759 --> 00:14:56,178
Michelle,
you're an excellent teacher.
355
00:14:56,280 --> 00:14:58,281
And you are clearly
a loving and caring mother.
356
00:14:59,163 --> 00:15:00,863
Look, you want Calvin
expelled from school,
357
00:15:00,963 --> 00:15:02,945
that's not feasible,
358
00:15:03,044 --> 00:15:05,288
but he doesn't have to take
biology this year.
359
00:15:06,488 --> 00:15:08,490
He could make it up
in summer school.
360
00:15:09,690 --> 00:15:11,351
I feel a little manipulated
by this delicious chocolate.
361
00:15:11,453 --> 00:15:13,553
Yeah, I feel the same.
362
00:15:13,654 --> 00:15:15,655
There's common ground.
363
00:15:21,581 --> 00:15:22,841
I liked what you said.
364
00:15:22,942 --> 00:15:24,082
This place sucks.
365
00:15:24,183 --> 00:15:26,184
It should be shut down.
366
00:15:32,188 --> 00:15:33,370
Hey, Jill.
367
00:15:33,471 --> 00:15:34,932
He said he'd like you
to read this,
368
00:15:35,031 --> 00:15:37,033
and then go right in.
369
00:15:39,594 --> 00:15:40,735
Polite note.
370
00:15:40,836 --> 00:15:43,418
May I keep this
for my collection of memorabilia
371
00:15:43,519 --> 00:15:45,741
of times when people
were being polite to me,
372
00:15:45,840 --> 00:15:47,702
only to be setting
a trap of some sort?
373
00:15:47,802 --> 00:15:49,623
I don't think it matters.
374
00:15:49,723 --> 00:15:50,944
Well, nothing matters.
375
00:15:51,044 --> 00:15:52,586
That can't be our standard.
376
00:15:52,685 --> 00:15:54,828
It tells me a lot
that you drove all this way.
377
00:15:54,927 --> 00:15:56,029
I appreciate that.
378
00:15:56,129 --> 00:15:57,030
You take it seriously.
379
00:15:57,129 --> 00:15:58,350
Because, guess what?
380
00:15:58,450 --> 00:15:59,732
I take it seriously,
and we should take it seriously.
381
00:15:59,732 --> 00:16:01,953
Are we upset?
You betcha.
382
00:16:02,053 --> 00:16:02,953
But what you have to understand
383
00:16:03,053 --> 00:16:05,274
is that Hank is going through
384
00:16:05,376 --> 00:16:08,319
a rough patch
with his diverticulitis.
385
00:16:08,418 --> 00:16:11,880
Infected and inflamed pouches
bulging from his colon.
386
00:16:11,982 --> 00:16:14,723
Complete bowel Armageddon.
387
00:16:14,822 --> 00:16:17,165
Is it an excuse?
No, of course not.
388
00:16:17,265 --> 00:16:18,486
Of course it isn't.
389
00:16:18,587 --> 00:16:20,809
He may not take that out
on your son,
390
00:16:20,908 --> 00:16:22,850
and everyone agrees with that,
391
00:16:22,951 --> 00:16:24,952
especially Hank.
392
00:16:26,351 --> 00:16:28,355
So we're on the same page.
393
00:16:29,475 --> 00:16:31,255
Bowel Armageddon?
Really?
394
00:16:31,357 --> 00:16:33,338
Hank, this article,
this is bad.
395
00:16:33,438 --> 00:16:35,440
I'm sure
they twisted my words.
396
00:16:36,962 --> 00:16:37,982
Oh.
397
00:16:38,082 --> 00:16:40,125
No, that's
pretty much verbatim.
398
00:16:42,126 --> 00:16:43,908
Well, they were
ganging up on me.
399
00:16:44,007 --> 00:16:44,947
They don't mention that.
400
00:16:45,048 --> 00:16:46,909
Every phone call
I've had today?
401
00:16:47,010 --> 00:16:49,071
Board members demanding that
I kick your butt off campus.
402
00:16:49,171 --> 00:16:50,312
Maybe you explain to them
403
00:16:50,413 --> 00:16:52,233
just how powerless
your position really is?
404
00:16:52,332 --> 00:16:53,235
I think they'll understand.
405
00:16:53,334 --> 00:16:54,515
I wish I could.
406
00:16:54,616 --> 00:16:55,677
It would make my life
a whole lot easier.
407
00:16:55,775 --> 00:16:57,838
Well, I think
it's a good thing.
408
00:16:57,938 --> 00:16:59,280
I put it out there.
409
00:16:59,379 --> 00:17:01,321
Maybe Railton
can become a beacon,
410
00:17:01,421 --> 00:17:04,363
a refuge now for
really, really lazy students.
411
00:17:04,464 --> 00:17:07,246
Just apologize
to the kid and his parents,
412
00:17:07,346 --> 00:17:08,767
make this go away.
I don't need this today.
413
00:17:08,868 --> 00:17:10,369
No, I am not apologizing.
414
00:17:10,467 --> 00:17:12,930
I mean, unless you name
a building after me--
415
00:17:13,031 --> 00:17:14,292
and not a dorm.
416
00:17:14,391 --> 00:17:17,133
I don't want any of these idiots
sleeping in my building.
417
00:17:17,235 --> 00:17:18,255
[Jill] Jacob?
418
00:17:18,354 --> 00:17:19,815
The President's on.
419
00:17:19,917 --> 00:17:21,257
You tell him I'm not sorry.
420
00:17:21,358 --> 00:17:22,538
Hank!
421
00:17:22,639 --> 00:17:24,300
This is not about
you and your little situation.
422
00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:26,221
I'll take it
in the conference room.
423
00:17:26,322 --> 00:17:27,382
Please tell
the William-Stevenses
424
00:17:27,483 --> 00:17:29,484
that I'll be back momentarily.
425
00:17:34,967 --> 00:17:36,950
Did Gracie really deserve
all that teasing?
426
00:17:37,051 --> 00:17:38,312
[Hank] "Deserve".
427
00:17:38,411 --> 00:17:40,833
You don't still believe
in "deserve", do you?
428
00:17:40,933 --> 00:17:42,195
It's an unfair world,
429
00:17:42,295 --> 00:17:44,417
I'm not going to even things up
with a few kind acts.
430
00:17:46,536 --> 00:17:48,920
You know...
431
00:17:49,019 --> 00:17:49,920
tenure doesn't mean
432
00:17:50,021 --> 00:17:51,122
you can't get smacked
in the face.
433
00:17:51,221 --> 00:17:54,123
No, it just means
I can never, ever be fired.
434
00:17:54,225 --> 00:17:55,746
It doesn't mean that, either.
435
00:17:55,846 --> 00:17:57,847
It kinda feels like it.
436
00:17:58,927 --> 00:18:00,829
So you're trying to get fired
with no hope of success?
437
00:18:00,930 --> 00:18:02,191
You think I'm trying
to get fired?
438
00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:04,833
Did you apologize to the kid?
439
00:18:04,933 --> 00:18:06,934
For what?
440
00:18:08,296 --> 00:18:09,396
You don't think
this has anything to do
441
00:18:09,497 --> 00:18:10,478
with that article
442
00:18:10,576 --> 00:18:11,759
you're pretending
not to carry around?
443
00:18:11,858 --> 00:18:13,279
I'm not carrying
anything around.
444
00:18:13,379 --> 00:18:14,361
No?
445
00:18:14,460 --> 00:18:15,561
So if I just--
446
00:18:15,662 --> 00:18:16,962
No, no!
447
00:18:17,063 --> 00:18:18,283
It might be there.
448
00:18:18,384 --> 00:18:20,384
I don't know.
449
00:18:21,665 --> 00:18:23,768
My father retires.
450
00:18:23,867 --> 00:18:24,929
It's a major thing.
451
00:18:25,029 --> 00:18:26,049
Big enough
452
00:18:26,150 --> 00:18:27,151
for the biggest newspaper
in the country
453
00:18:27,151 --> 00:18:28,771
to put it on the cover
of the arts section.
454
00:18:28,873 --> 00:18:30,874
Good for him.
455
00:18:31,754 --> 00:18:32,975
Also, I find out about it
456
00:18:33,076 --> 00:18:35,258
from the cover
of the arts section.
457
00:18:35,357 --> 00:18:37,500
Good for me.
458
00:18:37,598 --> 00:18:39,059
And this makes you feel...?
459
00:18:39,161 --> 00:18:41,183
Nothing.
460
00:18:41,282 --> 00:18:42,261
And that outburst in class?
461
00:18:42,363 --> 00:18:44,364
Was unrelated.
462
00:18:45,085 --> 00:18:46,146
In fact, it felt good.
463
00:18:46,247 --> 00:18:48,146
I told the truth.
464
00:18:48,248 --> 00:18:49,268
I think I inspired myself.
465
00:18:49,367 --> 00:18:51,391
To tell the truth more?
466
00:18:51,491 --> 00:18:53,491
That's not good.
467
00:18:53,853 --> 00:18:55,192
To work on my novel.
468
00:18:55,294 --> 00:18:57,715
Oh, great!
469
00:18:57,816 --> 00:18:59,718
Well, I love it when you start
your second novel.
470
00:18:59,817 --> 00:19:02,900
It's usually a wonderful time
in our marriage.
471
00:19:05,021 --> 00:19:07,021
How was your day?
472
00:19:09,105 --> 00:19:10,444
[Lily] Julie's coming over.
473
00:19:10,546 --> 00:19:12,087
I don't know why.
474
00:19:12,188 --> 00:19:14,049
[ "Jumping Strings"
by Paolo Andriotti playing]
475
00:19:14,148 --> 00:19:15,329
[Hank, thinking] I know why.
476
00:19:15,430 --> 00:19:16,809
It's these damn kids.
477
00:19:16,911 --> 00:19:20,054
They don't hate their parents--
478
00:19:20,154 --> 00:19:21,775
at least not enough
479
00:19:21,875 --> 00:19:23,817
to never ask them
for anything again.
480
00:19:23,915 --> 00:19:25,919
Yeah, I got it.
481
00:19:27,038 --> 00:19:28,059
The trouble is,
482
00:19:28,161 --> 00:19:30,142
my generation of parents--
483
00:19:30,241 --> 00:19:34,105
we can't let our kids feel
any pain in any way.
484
00:19:34,204 --> 00:19:36,467
It's a sick cycle,
485
00:19:36,567 --> 00:19:38,029
but to stop,
486
00:19:38,127 --> 00:19:40,350
that would take
courage and conviction.
487
00:19:40,451 --> 00:19:43,152
No. No way.
It's your turn.
488
00:19:43,252 --> 00:19:45,192
I can't ask my mother for money
twice in six months.
489
00:19:45,294 --> 00:19:46,154
I can't do that.
490
00:19:46,254 --> 00:19:47,236
Why not?
491
00:19:47,335 --> 00:19:48,355
She just became
a general manager.
492
00:19:48,457 --> 00:19:49,877
Yeah, of a Circle K!
493
00:19:49,978 --> 00:19:51,980
- It's not fair!
- Fine!
494
00:19:53,141 --> 00:19:54,561
I know my dad.
495
00:19:54,662 --> 00:19:55,962
He's gonna hold this against me.
496
00:19:56,062 --> 00:19:57,124
Well, your mum's the one
497
00:19:57,223 --> 00:19:58,605
who handles
all the finances, right?
498
00:19:58,704 --> 00:19:59,704
He's probably
not even going to notice
499
00:19:59,704 --> 00:20:01,728
that she lent us the money.
500
00:20:01,826 --> 00:20:02,808
That's true.
501
00:20:02,908 --> 00:20:04,910
He doesn't notice anything.
502
00:20:07,152 --> 00:20:09,134
When she gave me
our Cancun money,
503
00:20:09,233 --> 00:20:10,454
she said
if I borrowed money again,
504
00:20:10,555 --> 00:20:13,175
she'd make me sit down
and learn Quicken.
505
00:20:13,277 --> 00:20:14,458
Which isn't me, you know?
506
00:20:14,558 --> 00:20:16,180
I know...
507
00:20:16,279 --> 00:20:18,280
I know.
508
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:20,802
It's gotta be my dad.
509
00:20:27,567 --> 00:20:29,348
It's about respect.
510
00:20:29,450 --> 00:20:32,152
Gracie, why does this stuff
still bother you?
511
00:20:32,251 --> 00:20:33,512
You know who he is.
512
00:20:33,614 --> 00:20:34,795
Why something is wrong
513
00:20:34,895 --> 00:20:36,895
isn't relevant
to making it right.
514
00:20:38,297 --> 00:20:39,478
I can't do anything about it.
515
00:20:39,576 --> 00:20:40,598
Of course not.
516
00:20:40,699 --> 00:20:41,920
Hank's chair of the department.
517
00:20:42,020 --> 00:20:44,040
Course review
falls under his purview.
518
00:20:44,142 --> 00:20:46,404
As long as he's chair,
519
00:20:46,502 --> 00:20:48,566
there can't be
any serious action
520
00:20:48,665 --> 00:20:50,287
taken against him
or anyone else.
521
00:20:50,386 --> 00:20:51,768
"As long as he's chair"?
522
00:20:51,867 --> 00:20:52,768
Seriously?
523
00:20:52,867 --> 00:20:54,871
Hank's your problem, too.
524
00:20:56,352 --> 00:20:59,074
I mean,
there is a person there.
525
00:21:04,558 --> 00:21:06,881
There was a time
you couldn't resist me.
526
00:21:10,683 --> 00:21:12,684
No one could.
527
00:21:14,165 --> 00:21:15,667
Excuse the interruption.
528
00:21:15,768 --> 00:21:17,388
The president's office
said to let you know
529
00:21:17,489 --> 00:21:19,230
that he explained the urgency
of the situation
530
00:21:19,329 --> 00:21:20,392
to the board chair,
531
00:21:20,491 --> 00:21:22,492
and the trustees
will convene next week.
532
00:21:23,413 --> 00:21:24,713
When you find out when it is,
533
00:21:24,815 --> 00:21:26,076
please clear that day.
534
00:21:26,175 --> 00:21:28,177
[Jill] Will do.
535
00:21:31,980 --> 00:21:34,402
This isn't about
hitting Hank with the notebook?
536
00:21:34,502 --> 00:21:35,442
Because he--
537
00:21:35,544 --> 00:21:38,246
he walked into it a bit.
538
00:21:38,346 --> 00:21:41,608
One day, I'm going to meet
an English professor
539
00:21:41,709 --> 00:21:42,890
who understands that the world
540
00:21:42,989 --> 00:21:45,571
is full of lots of people
and ideas...
541
00:21:45,672 --> 00:21:47,413
You could just say yes or no.
542
00:21:47,511 --> 00:21:49,515
There's no need to be insulting.
543
00:21:50,276 --> 00:21:51,855
Is it about
Rourke's new course?
544
00:21:51,957 --> 00:21:53,959
Oh, my god.
545
00:21:56,361 --> 00:21:57,582
[Gracie] I'm telling you guys,
546
00:21:57,681 --> 00:21:59,623
this is the best thing
for our department.
547
00:21:59,722 --> 00:22:01,825
Gracie, this is very serious,
548
00:22:01,924 --> 00:22:03,346
and I have to say,
549
00:22:03,444 --> 00:22:06,348
we don't feel comfortable
plotting behind Hank's back.
550
00:22:06,449 --> 00:22:07,788
This is a good idea.
551
00:22:07,890 --> 00:22:09,892
Okay. Let's see
what we can get.
552
00:22:10,771 --> 00:22:13,354
This isn't something
we should take lightly,
553
00:22:13,453 --> 00:22:15,956
and it is the best thing
for the students, too.
554
00:22:16,056 --> 00:22:17,238
Gosh, Gracie,
555
00:22:17,337 --> 00:22:19,759
it seems like a lot of risk
for not a lot of reward.
556
00:22:19,858 --> 00:22:23,442
Okay, if you support
Hank's de-chairing,
557
00:22:23,542 --> 00:22:25,584
I'll switch places with you
on the sabbatical waitlist.
558
00:22:29,267 --> 00:22:31,608
[train whistle blowing]
559
00:22:31,709 --> 00:22:34,751
[phone buzzing]
560
00:22:38,395 --> 00:22:40,395
Hank, your phone.
561
00:22:45,319 --> 00:22:46,621
Yeah?
562
00:22:46,721 --> 00:22:48,302
[Billie] Hello, Spanky.
563
00:22:48,402 --> 00:22:49,502
Billie.
564
00:22:49,604 --> 00:22:50,585
How drunk are you?
565
00:22:50,684 --> 00:22:52,786
Plenty, but it's none of
your damn business,
566
00:22:52,884 --> 00:22:53,787
you son of a bitch.
567
00:22:53,886 --> 00:22:55,027
Hey, did you write
568
00:22:55,127 --> 00:22:56,670
that recommendation
for my daughter?
569
00:22:56,770 --> 00:22:58,111
I will.
570
00:22:58,210 --> 00:23:00,353
You will not.
571
00:23:00,451 --> 00:23:01,834
I don't want Meg living
572
00:23:01,933 --> 00:23:02,794
this damn life
573
00:23:02,893 --> 00:23:04,895
in this damn town.
574
00:23:06,537 --> 00:23:08,799
Ugh. What do you know
about raising a kid?
575
00:23:08,898 --> 00:23:10,901
You didn't even have a dad.
576
00:23:11,221 --> 00:23:12,402
I did.
577
00:23:12,501 --> 00:23:14,163
You were in diapers
when that shithead left.
578
00:23:14,263 --> 00:23:15,765
I was 14.
579
00:23:15,864 --> 00:23:18,206
You didn't even send
your daughter to college.
580
00:23:18,306 --> 00:23:19,567
What the hell is her name?
581
00:23:19,667 --> 00:23:22,029
I'd prefer you didn't
bring up my daughter.
582
00:23:27,114 --> 00:23:28,375
Billie?
583
00:23:28,473 --> 00:23:30,477
You there?
584
00:23:30,915 --> 00:23:32,919
How come you always
let me talk to you like this?
585
00:23:37,162 --> 00:23:40,025
Look, just don't write
the recommendation,
586
00:23:40,125 --> 00:23:41,065
even though who knows
587
00:23:41,163 --> 00:23:43,165
what it's gonna be worth
after tomorrow.
588
00:23:44,248 --> 00:23:45,189
Tomorrow?
589
00:23:45,288 --> 00:23:47,288
What happens tomorrow?
590
00:23:47,850 --> 00:23:49,853
So you're gonna be de-chaired?
591
00:23:50,771 --> 00:23:51,913
And then what does that mean?
592
00:23:52,012 --> 00:23:53,315
[Hank] De-chaired.
593
00:23:53,413 --> 00:23:54,757
I think
594
00:23:54,855 --> 00:23:56,857
it's an outpatient procedure
these days.
595
00:23:58,179 --> 00:24:00,401
Well, if I'm no longer chair,
596
00:24:00,500 --> 00:24:03,201
it's easier to fire me,
597
00:24:03,302 --> 00:24:06,645
and if I get fired,
598
00:24:06,746 --> 00:24:09,067
that's the end
of my academic career.
599
00:24:14,633 --> 00:24:16,634
You're smiling.
600
00:24:17,275 --> 00:24:19,276
Am I?
601
00:24:21,238 --> 00:24:23,180
Is that, um, opportunity
602
00:24:23,279 --> 00:24:24,340
for you to be
603
00:24:24,441 --> 00:24:27,363
assistant head of school
at Arlyle still possible?
604
00:24:28,523 --> 00:24:30,525
Seriously?
605
00:24:32,247 --> 00:24:34,248
Um...
606
00:24:35,127 --> 00:24:37,951
I mean, that was months ago,
so I don't...
607
00:24:38,050 --> 00:24:39,232
I don't know.
608
00:24:39,333 --> 00:24:40,674
I mean...
609
00:24:40,773 --> 00:24:42,775
Yeah, I could ask.
610
00:24:44,257 --> 00:24:46,238
New York.
611
00:24:46,337 --> 00:24:48,239
God.
612
00:24:48,338 --> 00:24:50,342
Could it finally be time?
613
00:24:52,183 --> 00:24:54,545
MOMA, instead of Roger's Art.
614
00:24:56,225 --> 00:24:58,008
Peter Luger's
instead of Outback.
615
00:24:58,107 --> 00:25:00,108
Mm...
616
00:25:01,829 --> 00:25:03,831
I mean, we'd be a little close
to your father.
617
00:25:04,712 --> 00:25:06,713
It's a city
of eight million people.
618
00:25:07,434 --> 00:25:09,297
I think I can avoid him.
619
00:25:09,396 --> 00:25:11,377
I don't know.
620
00:25:11,479 --> 00:25:13,480
We saw Catherine Keener twice.
621
00:25:17,763 --> 00:25:18,944
Do you know you make a move
622
00:25:19,045 --> 00:25:21,987
every time I say
"Catherine Keener"?
623
00:25:22,087 --> 00:25:24,088
Keep saying it,
see what it gets you.
624
00:25:36,578 --> 00:25:37,440
[phone buzzing]
625
00:25:37,538 --> 00:25:38,921
Yes?
626
00:25:39,020 --> 00:25:41,363
[woman] Hi. Am I speaking
with Professor Devereaux Jr.?
627
00:25:41,462 --> 00:25:42,683
Just Professor Devereaux.
628
00:25:42,783 --> 00:25:44,163
I've never had any confusion.
629
00:25:44,265 --> 00:25:46,207
Yes. Hello,
Professor Devereaux.
630
00:25:46,306 --> 00:25:48,308
This is Marnie Cole
from your father's office.
631
00:25:51,350 --> 00:25:54,113
Um, I hate to bother you
like this, but...
632
00:25:55,354 --> 00:25:56,694
Yeah?
633
00:25:56,795 --> 00:25:57,895
Stephanie asked me to call
634
00:25:57,996 --> 00:25:59,657
and let you know
that she has left your father.
635
00:25:59,758 --> 00:26:01,299
Stephanie?
Is that the maid?
636
00:26:01,398 --> 00:26:02,779
She's his wife.
637
00:26:02,879 --> 00:26:06,663
Uh, okay, well, I guess
he'll have to get a third wife.
638
00:26:06,761 --> 00:26:08,305
Well, that was his third wife.
639
00:26:08,404 --> 00:26:10,547
Well, I wish her well then.
640
00:26:10,646 --> 00:26:13,908
So, it's not an ideal time
for him to be alone.
641
00:26:14,009 --> 00:26:16,030
I think
maybe he could use some help.
642
00:26:16,131 --> 00:26:17,951
Marnie, um, I'm sorry.
643
00:26:18,052 --> 00:26:19,554
In the future,
644
00:26:19,654 --> 00:26:21,395
could you leave
messages like this
645
00:26:21,494 --> 00:26:23,355
with my assistant
in my office, okay?
646
00:26:23,456 --> 00:26:24,958
'Cause this is
my personal cell.
647
00:26:25,058 --> 00:26:27,759
This is only for friends
and work and family
648
00:26:27,861 --> 00:26:29,402
and marketing calls.
649
00:26:29,501 --> 00:26:31,042
Okay? You have
that other number?
650
00:26:31,143 --> 00:26:33,805
I do, but he is your family.
651
00:26:33,904 --> 00:26:35,407
Well, then he can call me.
652
00:26:35,507 --> 00:26:37,508
That would be
the first time in 15 years.
653
00:26:40,991 --> 00:26:43,292
I'm submitting
an alternate budget.
654
00:26:43,393 --> 00:26:44,492
Good.
655
00:26:44,594 --> 00:26:46,634
The first one was so boring.
656
00:26:50,679 --> 00:26:52,780
Could you run
the freshman requirements
657
00:26:52,881 --> 00:26:57,463
and service a major
with five professors, or...
658
00:26:57,565 --> 00:26:59,806
or four professors
and add a few more adjuncts?
659
00:27:01,448 --> 00:27:03,308
I need an answer
or I'm just gonna guess.
660
00:27:03,408 --> 00:27:04,348
Oh...
661
00:27:04,450 --> 00:27:06,392
this is fun.
662
00:27:06,491 --> 00:27:08,492
I like that we do this
every year.
663
00:27:09,453 --> 00:27:10,434
You know,
we could skip the stage
664
00:27:10,535 --> 00:27:11,395
where you threaten cuts
665
00:27:11,496 --> 00:27:12,436
and jump right to the part
666
00:27:12,537 --> 00:27:13,797
where you give me
my full budget.
667
00:27:13,896 --> 00:27:15,799
I've got
a fantasy pickleball league
668
00:27:15,898 --> 00:27:16,838
that's heating up.
669
00:27:16,940 --> 00:27:18,942
I don't have time for this.
670
00:27:20,422 --> 00:27:22,424
What?
671
00:27:23,826 --> 00:27:25,768
Jacob, what is it?
672
00:27:25,867 --> 00:27:27,249
You may have noticed
673
00:27:27,348 --> 00:27:30,451
that half the schools
in the country are broke.
674
00:27:30,550 --> 00:27:32,692
I noticed they're going out
to dinner less often.
675
00:27:32,792 --> 00:27:34,973
Well, think about
676
00:27:35,075 --> 00:27:37,837
what you can pull off
with three fewer professors.
677
00:27:41,879 --> 00:27:44,162
If I'm still chair in an hour,
I'll do that.
678
00:27:50,087 --> 00:27:52,229
Uh, first of all,
679
00:27:52,328 --> 00:27:53,629
I'd like to, um,
680
00:27:53,730 --> 00:27:54,790
I'd like to point out that,
681
00:27:54,891 --> 00:27:56,431
although I am
completely agnostic
682
00:27:56,532 --> 00:27:58,433
as to the outcome of the vote
that's about to take place--
683
00:27:58,533 --> 00:27:59,754
Paul, can you join us?
684
00:27:59,855 --> 00:28:01,997
Thank you. Thank you.
685
00:28:02,096 --> 00:28:04,038
Um, I was asked...
686
00:28:04,138 --> 00:28:05,117
by Dean Rose--
687
00:28:05,219 --> 00:28:06,681
Yeah, right.
688
00:28:06,780 --> 00:28:09,063
...to call this meeting
and motion for a vote.
689
00:28:15,146 --> 00:28:17,690
I heard that there was a vote
to remove me as chair.
690
00:28:17,788 --> 00:28:19,691
I just--
I didn't want to miss it.
691
00:28:19,790 --> 00:28:21,132
Jesus, Billie.
692
00:28:21,230 --> 00:28:23,233
Oh, what's
the goddamned difference?
693
00:28:30,239 --> 00:28:33,142
So, um,
Professor Wheemer has agreed
694
00:28:33,241 --> 00:28:34,422
to run the proceedings.
695
00:28:34,521 --> 00:28:35,703
I didn't really.
696
00:28:35,804 --> 00:28:37,265
[Billie] Weiner?
697
00:28:37,364 --> 00:28:38,266
She's not a professor.
698
00:28:38,366 --> 00:28:39,665
She shows movies.
699
00:28:39,767 --> 00:28:40,948
How is that teaching?
700
00:28:41,047 --> 00:28:42,268
She's a projectionist.
701
00:28:42,367 --> 00:28:44,350
Okay, it's "Wheemer"
with an "M",
702
00:28:44,451 --> 00:28:47,152
and I don't want to be running
these proceedings.
703
00:28:47,252 --> 00:28:48,233
I shouldn't.
704
00:28:48,334 --> 00:28:49,595
It's not fair.
705
00:28:49,694 --> 00:28:50,875
People around the world
706
00:28:50,975 --> 00:28:52,478
don't have access
to free speech,
707
00:28:52,576 --> 00:28:54,358
and I should just feel free
708
00:28:54,459 --> 00:28:57,402
to go on about calls
and recounts and whatnot?
709
00:28:57,501 --> 00:28:58,883
It's obscene.
710
00:28:58,982 --> 00:29:00,983
Okay, thanks, we got it.
Go, now.
711
00:29:03,547 --> 00:29:05,047
Okay, we're here
for a no-confidence vote
712
00:29:05,146 --> 00:29:06,929
for the chair of the department,
713
00:29:07,029 --> 00:29:08,411
for certain events
714
00:29:08,509 --> 00:29:09,852
that have transpired
over the past few days,
715
00:29:09,951 --> 00:29:14,315
and how he's conducted himself
in regards to those events.
716
00:29:15,997 --> 00:29:17,258
Would the accused
717
00:29:17,357 --> 00:29:18,518
like to say anything
in his defense before the vote?
718
00:29:18,518 --> 00:29:20,379
The accused?
719
00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:21,540
It was a good flick.
720
00:29:21,641 --> 00:29:23,583
Jodie Foster.
She won an Oscar for that film.
721
00:29:23,683 --> 00:29:25,384
We watch it in
my gender-analysis film class.
722
00:29:25,483 --> 00:29:27,746
New Bedford Chamber of Commerce
hated that movie.
723
00:29:27,846 --> 00:29:28,665
It killed
the Moby Dick tours.
724
00:29:28,767 --> 00:29:29,867
Okay, can we please--?
725
00:29:29,968 --> 00:29:33,569
Yes, the accused
would like to make a statement.
726
00:29:36,814 --> 00:29:38,795
The kid that I yelled at...
727
00:29:38,895 --> 00:29:40,317
okay...
728
00:29:40,415 --> 00:29:42,117
he killed my governess.
729
00:29:42,218 --> 00:29:43,279
This is many years ago,
730
00:29:43,377 --> 00:29:46,642
and I vowed revenge,
and now I have it,
731
00:29:46,741 --> 00:29:50,183
and it feels empty
in the way that novels predict.
732
00:29:58,309 --> 00:30:01,011
The question at hand
is a simple aye or nay.
733
00:30:01,113 --> 00:30:04,134
Should Hank be removed
from the chair?
734
00:30:04,236 --> 00:30:05,217
"Aye" means "yes".
735
00:30:05,317 --> 00:30:07,459
Can you just say yes?
736
00:30:07,558 --> 00:30:08,739
[Emma] Short answer,
yes with caveats.
737
00:30:08,838 --> 00:30:10,340
It requires a vote.
738
00:30:10,441 --> 00:30:11,382
You can make that motion,
739
00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:13,221
but not until
a call for new business.
740
00:30:13,323 --> 00:30:15,105
And I assume
you can get it seconded.
741
00:30:15,204 --> 00:30:18,146
I second the motion
that "aye" means "yes".
742
00:30:18,247 --> 00:30:20,469
Well, there hasn't been
a call for new business.
743
00:30:20,567 --> 00:30:21,829
I literally just explained that.
744
00:30:21,930 --> 00:30:23,230
Jesus Christ, guys.
745
00:30:23,329 --> 00:30:24,712
"Aye" it is!
746
00:30:24,811 --> 00:30:26,114
So an aye for an aye then?
747
00:30:26,213 --> 00:30:28,213
[laughs]
748
00:30:34,500 --> 00:30:36,501
[Hank, thinking]
The firing squad.
749
00:30:36,902 --> 00:30:39,605
They never sent one person--
it's a squad.
750
00:30:39,704 --> 00:30:42,767
The group effort makes it
more of a bonding event--
751
00:30:42,866 --> 00:30:46,710
like lions ripping apart
a scared gazelle.
752
00:30:47,951 --> 00:30:49,492
A pride.
753
00:30:49,593 --> 00:30:51,492
Good times.
754
00:30:51,594 --> 00:30:52,934
Okay, that's one aye,
755
00:30:53,035 --> 00:30:54,537
a nay,
756
00:30:54,636 --> 00:30:56,458
another aye...
757
00:30:56,558 --> 00:30:58,220
another aye,
758
00:30:58,319 --> 00:31:00,559
and that's it.
759
00:31:02,201 --> 00:31:04,203
That's three ayes, a nay,
and the rest abstain.
760
00:31:05,483 --> 00:31:07,487
Well, the ayes have it.
761
00:31:08,127 --> 00:31:10,127
Hank is officially removed
as the chair.
762
00:31:12,491 --> 00:31:13,712
[June] Wait.
763
00:31:13,811 --> 00:31:15,814
Who is the next chair?
764
00:31:18,934 --> 00:31:20,636
[Gracie] Why...
765
00:31:20,738 --> 00:31:24,000
so why don't we take
some time to discuss,
766
00:31:24,100 --> 00:31:27,143
and meet again tomorrow,
same time?
767
00:31:28,703 --> 00:31:31,826
[ "Love Is Like The Sea"
by Peter Neri playing]
768
00:31:34,387 --> 00:31:38,451
[♪]
769
00:31:38,550 --> 00:31:42,494
♪ Love is like the sea ♪
770
00:31:42,595 --> 00:31:47,619
♪ It carries you back
where you came from ♪
771
00:31:47,720 --> 00:31:50,980
♪ Love is like the cloud ♪
772
00:31:51,082 --> 00:31:55,944
♪ Fading away
but it comes again ♪
773
00:31:56,046 --> 00:31:59,768
[♪]
774
00:32:06,413 --> 00:32:10,498
[♪]
775
00:32:13,460 --> 00:32:15,883
[Hank] I guess I finally sunk
my own battleship.
776
00:32:15,982 --> 00:32:19,204
That's the first time I made
the whole department happy.
777
00:32:19,305 --> 00:32:21,406
[Lily] Well, I wouldn't
beat yourself up too hard.
778
00:32:21,507 --> 00:32:23,608
[Hank] Done.
779
00:32:23,709 --> 00:32:25,608
Because...
780
00:32:25,710 --> 00:32:27,172
I called Tom Leska...
781
00:32:27,271 --> 00:32:30,895
and they have not filled
the position at Arlyle.
782
00:32:30,994 --> 00:32:32,454
He didn't exactly
offer me the job,
783
00:32:32,556 --> 00:32:34,718
but he sure seemed to imply
that I have a shot.
784
00:32:36,117 --> 00:32:37,059
Whoa.
785
00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:39,161
Yeah, I know.
786
00:32:45,246 --> 00:32:46,507
It's just...
787
00:32:46,605 --> 00:32:47,587
logistics.
788
00:32:47,687 --> 00:32:49,509
I mean, our--
789
00:32:49,608 --> 00:32:50,710
our daughter's here,
790
00:32:50,809 --> 00:32:52,392
and my mum.
791
00:32:52,491 --> 00:32:53,792
There's a few things
that we need--
792
00:32:53,893 --> 00:32:54,992
we need to talk through,
793
00:32:55,094 --> 00:32:55,994
we need to work out.
794
00:32:56,095 --> 00:32:58,076
Don't. Don't.
Don't do that.
795
00:32:58,175 --> 00:33:00,177
Don't do that.
796
00:33:05,102 --> 00:33:07,104
Actually, it's my fault.
797
00:33:09,105 --> 00:33:10,967
Where are you going?
798
00:33:11,067 --> 00:33:11,968
I'm going for a run.
799
00:33:12,067 --> 00:33:13,449
What? It's 11:00 p.m...
800
00:33:13,549 --> 00:33:14,730
You already ran today.
801
00:33:14,829 --> 00:33:15,809
There's raccoons out there!
802
00:33:15,911 --> 00:33:16,931
Did you just make a joke?
803
00:33:17,031 --> 00:33:19,033
Uh-uh.
804
00:33:24,076 --> 00:33:25,617
I forgot
805
00:33:25,719 --> 00:33:27,701
that you aren't capable
of leaving this town
806
00:33:27,800 --> 00:33:31,502
for reasons that will only
be fully understood
807
00:33:31,604 --> 00:33:33,223
by your future therapist.
808
00:33:33,325 --> 00:33:35,267
I learned it years ago,
809
00:33:35,366 --> 00:33:36,268
I just forgot it.
810
00:33:36,367 --> 00:33:38,367
So shame on me.
811
00:33:49,018 --> 00:33:50,637
[Julie] Good morning.
812
00:33:50,739 --> 00:33:52,741
Hey.
813
00:33:53,821 --> 00:33:55,823
Um, I made coffee.
814
00:33:57,305 --> 00:33:59,046
Thanks.
815
00:33:59,145 --> 00:34:00,886
You came over here
early in the morning
816
00:34:00,988 --> 00:34:02,127
to make me coffee?
817
00:34:02,229 --> 00:34:04,230
I just wanted to have breakfast
with you guys.
818
00:34:05,391 --> 00:34:06,652
I was also going to tell you,
819
00:34:06,751 --> 00:34:10,534
um, I saw Stacey Rose
at the supermarket yesterday.
820
00:34:10,635 --> 00:34:12,636
I don't know if Dean Rose
mentioned that to you?
821
00:34:13,638 --> 00:34:14,779
[Hank] He didn't.
822
00:34:14,879 --> 00:34:16,100
[Julie] Well, she says hi.
823
00:34:16,199 --> 00:34:18,202
She wants everyone to come over
for dinner some time.
824
00:34:19,242 --> 00:34:21,243
The whole gang.
825
00:34:24,687 --> 00:34:26,507
Do you want to play
Bananagrams?
826
00:34:26,608 --> 00:34:28,610
Do you remember when we used
to do this before school?
827
00:34:29,851 --> 00:34:31,853
Yeah, sure.
828
00:34:40,980 --> 00:34:42,802
Oh, um...
829
00:34:42,902 --> 00:34:44,002
I was also going to tell you,
830
00:34:44,103 --> 00:34:45,243
Russell actually has
831
00:34:45,344 --> 00:34:46,804
a pretty interesting opportunity.
832
00:34:46,904 --> 00:34:48,326
Oh?
833
00:34:48,426 --> 00:34:51,087
Yeah, yeah,
it's pretty exciting stuff,
834
00:34:51,188 --> 00:34:52,368
and it's really next level,
835
00:34:52,469 --> 00:34:53,971
and he can get in
on the ground floor.
836
00:34:54,071 --> 00:34:55,452
Ground floor, that sounds--
837
00:34:55,552 --> 00:34:57,493
that sounds a little low
for next level.
838
00:34:57,592 --> 00:34:58,935
Are you sure he's got
the right entrance?
839
00:34:59,034 --> 00:35:01,857
That is hilarious.
840
00:35:01,957 --> 00:35:03,337
Um...
841
00:35:03,438 --> 00:35:04,578
yeah, no,
842
00:35:04,679 --> 00:35:05,699
it would just require him
843
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:06,721
not getting
a paycheck for a while,
844
00:35:06,721 --> 00:35:07,902
is the thing.
845
00:35:08,002 --> 00:35:09,743
- Darn it.
- Yeah.
846
00:35:09,842 --> 00:35:11,063
So we're just figuring out
847
00:35:11,163 --> 00:35:13,525
how to get from here to there
in the meantime.
848
00:35:15,648 --> 00:35:16,669
You know what?
849
00:35:16,769 --> 00:35:18,770
I think I could help.
850
00:35:20,252 --> 00:35:21,993
Really?
851
00:35:22,092 --> 00:35:23,675
Yeah. I mean, my thought is
852
00:35:23,775 --> 00:35:26,237
what if Russell were to take
a less interesting job,
853
00:35:26,337 --> 00:35:27,558
but one that paid right away?
854
00:35:27,658 --> 00:35:28,639
Dad!
855
00:35:28,739 --> 00:35:30,040
See, I'm doing the math,
856
00:35:30,140 --> 00:35:31,441
and I think that actually,
that works great.
857
00:35:31,541 --> 00:35:32,582
You're not doing the math,
you're being an asshole.
858
00:35:32,582 --> 00:35:33,603
Now is not a good time, okay,
859
00:35:33,703 --> 00:35:34,623
because I have to save
for retirement.
860
00:35:34,623 --> 00:35:35,563
It's never a good time!
861
00:35:35,663 --> 00:35:36,605
I owe that to you,
862
00:35:36,705 --> 00:35:38,807
otherwise I become
your dependent
863
00:35:38,907 --> 00:35:40,048
and live in your home.
864
00:35:40,148 --> 00:35:42,929
"Michael experienced 4:00 a.m.
differently as an adult.
865
00:35:43,029 --> 00:35:45,212
The alarm clock used to mean
hockey practice and friends,
866
00:35:45,312 --> 00:35:46,893
and now it means cows
867
00:35:46,993 --> 00:35:48,255
and the start
of another shift on the ranch--"
868
00:35:48,355 --> 00:35:49,736
Okay, let's talk.
869
00:35:49,836 --> 00:35:52,618
You mean us, or--?
870
00:35:52,717 --> 00:35:54,960
Yeah, what do we all think
of this letter from Bartow?
871
00:35:56,601 --> 00:35:57,702
Are you asking us?
872
00:35:57,802 --> 00:36:00,464
'Cause I think he made
some pretty good points.
873
00:36:00,563 --> 00:36:02,566
Okay, name one.
874
00:36:03,487 --> 00:36:07,850
That we deserve a teacher
who believes in us.
875
00:36:09,452 --> 00:36:10,712
That does sound nice.
876
00:36:10,813 --> 00:36:12,813
I mean, it's all
in the letter, Professor.
877
00:36:14,456 --> 00:36:16,237
"I, Bartow Williams-Stevens,
878
00:36:16,337 --> 00:36:18,199
am compelled to write
this open letter
879
00:36:18,299 --> 00:36:21,361
because you have humiliated me
and I feel terrible."
880
00:36:21,461 --> 00:36:24,243
Okay, you don't have to say
you feel terrible.
881
00:36:24,344 --> 00:36:27,286
That's a natural result
of being humiliated, so...
882
00:36:27,386 --> 00:36:29,248
repetitive.
883
00:36:29,348 --> 00:36:32,810
"I believe we deserve teachers
who believe in us."
884
00:36:32,911 --> 00:36:34,252
That's a lot of believing.
885
00:36:34,351 --> 00:36:37,154
Overuse of a word
diminishes its power.
886
00:36:41,157 --> 00:36:42,458
Well, it's terribly written,
887
00:36:42,558 --> 00:36:46,161
which is too bad because
he makes some good points.
888
00:36:48,924 --> 00:36:50,925
[knocking on door]
889
00:36:52,206 --> 00:36:54,108
Calvin just broke a window
in the east hallway.
890
00:36:54,208 --> 00:36:55,188
What?
891
00:36:55,288 --> 00:36:57,391
I told you.
I said it.
892
00:36:57,491 --> 00:36:59,632
I said the kid
needed to be expelled,
893
00:36:59,732 --> 00:37:01,353
and then you charmed us.
894
00:37:01,453 --> 00:37:03,716
The situation
didn't need pacifying,
895
00:37:03,816 --> 00:37:05,636
it needed a hard action.
896
00:37:05,737 --> 00:37:07,739
You solved nothing.
897
00:37:15,665 --> 00:37:16,645
Can we make this quick
898
00:37:16,746 --> 00:37:19,028
because I lose my court
in 15 minutes?
899
00:37:21,069 --> 00:37:23,572
"Hell is empty
and all the devils are here."
900
00:37:23,672 --> 00:37:25,053
[Emma] Okay.
901
00:37:25,153 --> 00:37:26,453
Rules are
a simple plurality wins.
902
00:37:26,554 --> 00:37:28,736
You may vote for anyone,
including yourself.
903
00:37:28,836 --> 00:37:31,058
Once the votes are filled out
and collected,
904
00:37:31,158 --> 00:37:32,379
there is no adjustment
of the vote.
905
00:37:32,478 --> 00:37:34,140
It's final.
906
00:37:34,240 --> 00:37:36,382
Write along the line
with words--
907
00:37:36,482 --> 00:37:38,384
no doodles, Paul--
908
00:37:38,484 --> 00:37:40,185
and fold it one time.
909
00:37:40,284 --> 00:37:42,287
No quarter folds.
910
00:37:42,807 --> 00:37:44,809
Okay, does everyone understand?
911
00:37:46,010 --> 00:37:48,032
Goddamnit, I need to hear
a plurality of voices.
912
00:37:48,132 --> 00:37:49,112
[group, in unison] Aye.
913
00:37:49,212 --> 00:37:50,153
Hey! Look, you did it!
914
00:37:50,252 --> 00:37:52,255
All right, go ahead.
915
00:38:06,707 --> 00:38:08,048
All right.
916
00:38:08,148 --> 00:38:10,149
And here we go.
917
00:38:11,110 --> 00:38:13,112
One vote for June.
918
00:38:13,752 --> 00:38:14,893
One vote for Teddy.
919
00:38:14,993 --> 00:38:16,615
You voted for yourself?
920
00:38:16,715 --> 00:38:18,416
We agreed last night that--
921
00:38:18,516 --> 00:38:20,418
Yes, we agreed to vote for me.
922
00:38:20,518 --> 00:38:21,938
Why would we agree
to vote for you?
923
00:38:22,038 --> 00:38:23,260
- That makes no sense.
- There are complications.
924
00:38:23,360 --> 00:38:24,661
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
925
00:38:24,761 --> 00:38:27,183
Can you do your evil scheming
in your underground lair
926
00:38:27,283 --> 00:38:29,065
and not at work?
927
00:38:29,165 --> 00:38:31,166
One vote for me?
928
00:38:35,330 --> 00:38:38,112
One vote for "Hank.
Ha ha, damn you all to hell."
929
00:38:38,212 --> 00:38:39,433
Damn you all to hell.
930
00:38:39,533 --> 00:38:41,515
One vote for a new iPad.
931
00:38:41,615 --> 00:38:44,157
These go to Santa
eventually, right?
932
00:38:44,257 --> 00:38:46,259
One vote for Rourke.
933
00:38:46,859 --> 00:38:48,360
Don't mind if I do.
934
00:38:48,460 --> 00:38:50,462
[Emma] Yikes.
935
00:38:51,183 --> 00:38:53,184
And another vote for Hank.
936
00:38:56,787 --> 00:38:57,768
[Paul] Hank?
937
00:38:57,868 --> 00:38:59,650
Wait, what the hell
just happened?
938
00:38:59,750 --> 00:39:01,011
I...
939
00:39:01,111 --> 00:39:04,453
I thought that
I was throwing away my vote,
940
00:39:04,554 --> 00:39:07,816
um, as a form of abstaining,
941
00:39:07,916 --> 00:39:09,257
which, as you know
942
00:39:09,357 --> 00:39:10,819
from my essay,
"The Art of Abstention"--
943
00:39:10,919 --> 00:39:12,260
And that's it.
944
00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:14,361
[Teddy] Wait, what?
945
00:39:15,162 --> 00:39:18,865
Yeah, the only person
with more than one vote is...
946
00:39:18,965 --> 00:39:20,967
Hank.
947
00:39:24,690 --> 00:39:26,691
Hank's our new chair.
948
00:39:27,492 --> 00:39:29,754
[Emma] A fresh term
of three years begins...
949
00:39:29,853 --> 00:39:31,355
now.
950
00:39:31,455 --> 00:39:33,457
Sorry.
951
00:39:34,978 --> 00:39:38,261
[ "Free Love Sequence"
by Danielle Luppi playing]
952
00:39:46,226 --> 00:39:48,049
- My point.
- What?
953
00:39:48,149 --> 00:39:50,851
- Meniscus Rules.
- But you could've got that!
954
00:39:50,951 --> 00:39:51,971
Not without taking a step.
955
00:39:52,072 --> 00:39:54,074
You could have tilted
like a teapot.
956
00:39:56,676 --> 00:39:57,617
You're stepping now.
957
00:39:57,717 --> 00:40:00,339
To serve!
It's different.
958
00:40:00,438 --> 00:40:02,440
Just once,
I'd like to play fair.
959
00:40:08,926 --> 00:40:10,927
My point.
960
00:40:12,569 --> 00:40:13,909
I'm wondering
961
00:40:14,010 --> 00:40:16,351
if it's the forbidden nature
of all the sexual politics
962
00:40:16,452 --> 00:40:18,833
that's making the sex better.
963
00:40:18,934 --> 00:40:21,236
There's more at risk.
964
00:40:21,336 --> 00:40:23,518
Maybe the sex is...
965
00:40:23,618 --> 00:40:26,080
exactly the same...
966
00:40:26,179 --> 00:40:27,441
and you're losing touch
with your partner
967
00:40:27,541 --> 00:40:29,121
as a human being
968
00:40:29,221 --> 00:40:32,885
due to your advanced age
and growing callousness.
969
00:40:32,985 --> 00:40:33,926
Yeah, I thought of that,
970
00:40:34,025 --> 00:40:35,527
but multiple women have told me
971
00:40:35,627 --> 00:40:37,609
I'm becoming
a better fornicator.
972
00:40:37,708 --> 00:40:39,931
Multiple women.
973
00:40:40,031 --> 00:40:41,172
And there's nothing
in it for them.
974
00:40:41,272 --> 00:40:43,273
They didn't have to say that.
975
00:40:47,397 --> 00:40:49,978
Why can't racquetball
be most of the day,
976
00:40:50,078 --> 00:40:52,081
and then everything else
is just one hour?
977
00:40:54,643 --> 00:40:55,743
Picture your perfect life.
978
00:40:55,844 --> 00:40:57,904
Put it on a tableau for me.
979
00:40:58,005 --> 00:41:00,007
Paint it on that wall.
980
00:41:00,768 --> 00:41:02,769
What do you see?
981
00:41:04,571 --> 00:41:07,773
[♪]
982
00:41:11,216 --> 00:41:13,438
I can't improve on
that white wall.
983
00:41:13,538 --> 00:41:15,480
It's...
984
00:41:15,580 --> 00:41:17,581
it's-- it's soothing.
985
00:41:24,587 --> 00:41:26,929
I'm scared that...
986
00:41:27,029 --> 00:41:28,210
my father's retirement
987
00:41:28,310 --> 00:41:29,491
is going to upset
988
00:41:29,591 --> 00:41:31,592
this very delicate balance
that we've achieved.
989
00:41:33,234 --> 00:41:35,236
He left and we don't speak.
990
00:41:36,996 --> 00:41:39,339
I think I'm feeling regret.
991
00:41:39,438 --> 00:41:40,740
All these years,
992
00:41:40,840 --> 00:41:43,402
I haven't fully appreciated
all that I didn't have.
993
00:41:49,447 --> 00:41:51,449
Multiple women.
994
00:42:00,616 --> 00:42:02,698
- Hey, guess what?
- I'm running.
995
00:42:20,032 --> 00:42:21,373
They made me chair again.
996
00:42:21,473 --> 00:42:22,574
Three more years.
997
00:42:22,674 --> 00:42:24,015
[ "I Started A Joke"
by the Bee Gees playing]
998
00:42:24,115 --> 00:42:26,657
♪ I started a joke ♪
999
00:42:26,757 --> 00:42:30,440
♪ Which started
the whole world crying... ♪
1000
00:42:32,482 --> 00:42:33,423
I'll see you at home.
1001
00:42:33,523 --> 00:42:35,645
♪ ...But I didn't see... ♪
1002
00:42:39,648 --> 00:42:42,370
♪ ...That the joke was on me ♪
1003
00:42:47,374 --> 00:42:51,377
[♪]