1
00:00:13,471 --> 00:00:16,558
-Hold all my--
2
00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:51,926
Simmons, do you trust me?
3
00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:53,720
-Meh.
-Do you trust me?
4
00:00:53,803 --> 00:00:55,221
With my life.
5
00:01:03,980 --> 00:01:06,357
Sorry. I get them when I'm nervous.
6
00:01:06,441 --> 00:01:07,650
Don't touch it.
7
00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:09,944
We've got a looky-loo. Split up.
8
00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:30,632
Katja, wanna join my Poetry Club?
9
00:01:30,715 --> 00:01:32,801
It's haiku night.
10
00:01:39,265 --> 00:01:40,975
What's this all about?
11
00:01:41,059 --> 00:01:44,687
The end of
Baby Corp's five percenter system.
12
00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:50,610
What? The five percenter system works.
The cutest babies generate the most love.
13
00:01:50,693 --> 00:01:51,986
Let me diagram it.
14
00:01:52,070 --> 00:01:55,448
We got some babies up here
in the top 5% cuteness zone
15
00:01:55,532 --> 00:01:58,827
and more down here
in the average-to-yikes region.
16
00:01:58,910 --> 00:02:02,956
So when Baby Corp says
these cuties deserve more love,
17
00:02:03,039 --> 00:02:05,792
what you wind up with is a big old butt.
18
00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:08,711
Whoa. I don't wanna be a big butt.
19
00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:12,465
No one does.
That's why some of us are fighting back.
20
00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:14,843
Nannycam's never gonna agree.
21
00:02:14,926 --> 00:02:18,054
Why do you think we're all secretive?
22
00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:22,058
Eight signature lines for the heads
of all eight Baby Corp departments.
23
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:25,854
If all eight agree
to end the five percenter system,
24
00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:27,772
forget what Nannycam says.
25
00:02:27,856 --> 00:02:31,818
We can take this
to her bosses, the Board of Directors.
26
00:02:31,901 --> 00:02:36,281
We got IT, HR, and, of course,
Tina and me in Field Operations.
27
00:02:36,364 --> 00:02:38,408
R & D would put us halfway there.
28
00:02:38,491 --> 00:02:40,493
But if we don't get all eight,
29
00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:42,871
we're probably getting fired.
30
00:02:42,954 --> 00:02:45,707
HR keeps it real, okay?
31
00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:50,587
-So this is where you are hiding.
32
00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:51,754
Hide the butt.
33
00:02:53,923 --> 00:02:56,676
Uncuddleables are attacking
a five percenter.
34
00:02:56,759 --> 00:02:57,969
Oh, thank good--
35
00:02:58,052 --> 00:03:00,638
This atrocity will not stand.
36
00:03:01,806 --> 00:03:03,308
It's Fights Himself in Mirror Baby.
37
00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:05,268
For reals? No.
38
00:03:05,351 --> 00:03:06,603
I love that kid.
39
00:03:06,686 --> 00:03:09,230
Saw him drop-kick a puddle once.
What's the sitch?
40
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:13,192
These two are hogging
the only mirror at Junior Fancy Junior's.
41
00:03:13,276 --> 00:03:17,697
-It's okay. Big kids will be done soon.
-Any time now.
42
00:03:17,780 --> 00:03:21,451
Baby Love's getting dicey.
Tell me you got something going.
43
00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:25,580
Too public for open conflict. Pip,
think you can run interference on Mia?
44
00:03:25,663 --> 00:03:27,707
I never think.
45
00:03:33,004 --> 00:03:35,089
That twerp jacked my ride.
46
00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:39,469
Dez, you're up. Ready to be
a cute baby's cute punching bag?
47
00:03:39,552 --> 00:03:43,014
I am a shoe bench
with a mirror. It'll be my honor.
48
00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:47,477
There you go.
Stick your reflection and move.
49
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:48,978
-No, you don't.
-Whoa!
50
00:04:00,949 --> 00:04:02,909
That baby can take a beating.
51
00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:05,245
How's the revolution going?
52
00:04:05,328 --> 00:04:08,081
Not bad. Another department head signed.
53
00:04:08,164 --> 00:04:11,501
We should do a barbecue or-- Sorry.
54
00:04:11,584 --> 00:04:12,418
Sorry?
55
00:04:12,502 --> 00:04:15,755
Since when do Uncuddleables apologize?
56
00:04:15,838 --> 00:04:18,341
Uh, let's check on Pip.
57
00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:22,553
I got holes open and stuff's falling out.
58
00:04:22,637 --> 00:04:24,347
Send medical assistance.
59
00:04:26,182 --> 00:04:28,685
They're fighting dirty. Pip's down.
60
00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:31,229
No one messes with my team.
61
00:04:36,359 --> 00:04:38,903
Oh, he's fighting himself.
62
00:04:39,487 --> 00:04:40,822
Legend does it again.
63
00:04:40,905 --> 00:04:41,739
That was...
64
00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:42,907
Terrible.
65
00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:45,868
We almost get busted
by Security Baby Katja,
66
00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:48,788
then I got Austin apologizing
during distraction ops.
67
00:04:48,871 --> 00:04:51,457
Sorry. Ah! Sorry. Ah!
68
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,501
We can't risk getting sloppy.
69
00:04:53,584 --> 00:04:56,879
Not while this secret revolution
is short four department heads.
70
00:04:56,963 --> 00:05:00,133
-Three. Chip's on board.
-Give me that paper.
71
00:05:00,216 --> 00:05:03,011
The Legal Department is signing on.
72
00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:06,639
-That snack stealer is in Legal?
-Head of Legal.
73
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:10,560
Great.
You only need three more department heads.
74
00:05:10,643 --> 00:05:13,896
Uh, it's not about how many are left.
75
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:16,733
It's about who is left.
76
00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:19,819
Keep my jam going, Antonio,
77
00:05:19,902 --> 00:05:22,947
'cause HR is about to get personnel funky.
78
00:05:23,031 --> 00:05:26,826
Challenge 1, Bad Idea Baby in Marketing.
79
00:05:26,909 --> 00:05:30,538
Whatever the smart move is,
don't count on him making it.
80
00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:32,290
Marketing.
81
00:05:32,373 --> 00:05:33,249
Challenge 2,
82
00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:35,501
Amal in Accounting.
83
00:05:35,585 --> 00:05:39,130
Yeah, Amal's a company baby.
He'll be the trickiest recruit.
84
00:05:39,213 --> 00:05:41,758
Challenge number ultimate,
85
00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:43,843
Security Baby Katja.
86
00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:46,345
Security.
87
00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:47,638
-Man.
88
00:05:47,722 --> 00:05:51,601
It's me. I know babies better
than their own pediatricians.
89
00:05:51,684 --> 00:05:53,603
Heck, I'll start with Katja.
90
00:05:53,686 --> 00:05:56,272
Put on my best how-are-you smile.
91
00:05:56,355 --> 00:06:01,277
Uh, what's a how-are-you smi--?
Oh, how sweet of you. I'm all good.
92
00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:04,572
Whoa, those gums got some kick.
93
00:06:04,655 --> 00:06:06,991
And march right down to her office.
94
00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:08,618
I doubt you'll find her there.
95
00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:12,997
I see her in the High Security Wing
when I work on the UltraBaby Omega doodad.
96
00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:14,373
What doodad?
97
00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:17,835
Some tech designs
Nannycam had me work up for UBO.
98
00:06:17,919 --> 00:06:19,170
Pretty hush-hush.
99
00:06:19,253 --> 00:06:20,546
Whoa, weird.
100
00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:23,841
Nannycam had me working
on some voice recognition software.
101
00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:26,594
She said that was a hush-hush UBO thing.
102
00:06:26,677 --> 00:06:28,262
Whoa, weird.
103
00:06:28,346 --> 00:06:31,891
Nannycam asked me
to write some hush-hush legal memos
104
00:06:31,974 --> 00:06:34,977
to protect Baby Corp
if it became public knowledge
105
00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:39,565
she authorized the use
of a cute baby to torture teenagers.
106
00:06:39,649 --> 00:06:42,401
And guess who found a loophole.
107
00:06:42,485 --> 00:06:45,988
Nannycam had everyone working
on slices of this plan,
108
00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:48,533
but no one knows the whole pie.
109
00:06:52,537 --> 00:06:54,831
I'm sure it was inspiring in duck.
110
00:06:54,914 --> 00:06:55,748
Curtis, no.
111
00:06:55,832 --> 00:06:58,000
He's offering to be bait, to get inside,
112
00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:00,962
and help us
learn more about the UBO plans.
113
00:07:04,423 --> 00:07:08,761
I play two instruments,
and those are the only options you get.
114
00:07:09,512 --> 00:07:11,722
-We brought a present.
115
00:07:11,806 --> 00:07:15,935
-Lumpy Curtis.
-Gonna take him down for questioning.
116
00:07:16,018 --> 00:07:19,689
-Figured you'd wanna hear the good news.
-Hold up. Hot idea.
117
00:07:19,772 --> 00:07:22,733
I've been cooking something V top-secret.
118
00:07:22,817 --> 00:07:25,153
I was looking
for a guinea pig to test it on.
119
00:07:25,236 --> 00:07:28,448
But, hey, I'll take a gross duck.
Great timing.
120
00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:31,451
Suspiciously coincidental.
121
00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:35,455
I love coincidences.
I call them nature's made-you-looks.
122
00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:36,497
Let's go.
123
00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:40,460
Keep Nannycam busy.
I'll get to work on Katja.
124
00:07:42,837 --> 00:07:44,755
Your face is broken.
125
00:07:44,839 --> 00:07:48,676
Admiring your leash holding.
You could be in a dog show.
126
00:07:48,759 --> 00:07:50,720
Dogs grow from puppies.
127
00:07:50,803 --> 00:07:53,431
Puppies are our enemies.
Are you a traitor?
128
00:07:53,514 --> 00:07:57,059
No,
I just think those dog shows are silly.
129
00:07:57,143 --> 00:08:01,063
Your chitchat is bad.
Possibly because of your broken face.
130
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:03,024
We will walk in silence now.
131
00:08:05,693 --> 00:08:08,988
Top-secret plans, huh?
Should I be nervous?
132
00:08:09,071 --> 00:08:12,241
All good.
I'm looking to go out a legend myself.
133
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,868
Go out a legend?
134
00:08:13,951 --> 00:08:17,997
-Okay, you know these two?
-He was in every movie last year.
135
00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:19,624
She's on every magazine cover.
136
00:08:19,707 --> 00:08:21,417
-Love her album.
-Love his album.
137
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,295
World's most beautiful celebrity couple.
138
00:08:24,378 --> 00:08:27,173
People who know their way around a camera.
139
00:08:27,256 --> 00:08:30,218
And so will their new bundle of joy,
140
00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:32,762
Always on Camera Baby, me.
141
00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:34,680
That's your secret plan?
142
00:08:34,764 --> 00:08:35,598
Retiring?
143
00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:38,392
In Hollywood celebrity baby style.
144
00:08:38,476 --> 00:08:41,729
Then what are we doing here?
We have a retirement party to plan.
145
00:08:41,812 --> 00:08:44,440
I told you, I wanna go out a legend.
146
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:47,652
But Uncuddleables
came looking to take it down,
147
00:08:47,735 --> 00:08:49,612
sabotaged that baby pageant.
148
00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:52,823
Remember how our UBO
got exposed longer than eight seconds,
149
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:55,660
and it was so painful
to look at everybody scream
150
00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:58,579
like their eyes
were trying to bite their faces?
151
00:08:58,663 --> 00:09:01,165
It was a week ago, and I was there.
152
00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:04,418
Let me tell you
what I saw up on that stage.
153
00:09:04,502 --> 00:09:06,379
-A vision.
154
00:09:06,921 --> 00:09:08,548
Don't cover those eyes.
155
00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:11,050
I don't wanna look longer
than eight seconds.
156
00:09:11,133 --> 00:09:14,971
Leave that worry in the past.
The future is here.
157
00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:20,017
Is that UBO?
158
00:09:20,101 --> 00:09:23,646
Well, it's a suit
with its own artificial intelligence
159
00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:29,277
and threat-detection software,
but our nukey-cutie UBO's inside.
160
00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:30,736
Check this out.
161
00:09:32,321 --> 00:09:34,282
Enemy detected.
162
00:09:40,955 --> 00:09:45,960
The theory was, harness the power
of UBO's so-cute-it's-painful adorability
163
00:09:46,043 --> 00:09:48,296
into one focused burst,
164
00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:53,467
and it'll render any enemy
completely terrified of babies.
165
00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:56,012
Theory proved.
166
00:09:56,095 --> 00:10:00,308
I'm taking down those Uncuddleables,
and going out laughing.
167
00:10:00,391 --> 00:10:03,936
I don't want my brain lasered
until I fear babies.
168
00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:08,399
I am an actor, and a babysitter,
and only one pays.
169
00:10:08,482 --> 00:10:09,609
We made a deal.
170
00:10:09,692 --> 00:10:12,069
And you made a superweapon?
171
00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:13,696
They didn't do it on purpose.
172
00:10:13,779 --> 00:10:15,823
Stop being a corporate kiss-up.
173
00:10:15,906 --> 00:10:17,533
Stop attacking my boss.
174
00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:19,577
Stop attacking our brains.
175
00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:21,746
Stop fighting.
176
00:10:24,332 --> 00:10:26,459
Dad says, "Never waste a cookie."
177
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:30,463
Every baby is risking their jobs
to change things at Baby Corp.
178
00:10:30,546 --> 00:10:34,383
You're not the ones with a superweapon
targeting your skull spaghetti.
179
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:37,595
But that's the whole thing.
UBO isn't a weapon.
180
00:10:37,678 --> 00:10:38,804
She's a baby.
181
00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:43,392
She deserves love like anybody else
left behind by this five percenter system.
182
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:46,187
So we're not gonna stop UBO?
183
00:10:46,270 --> 00:10:48,356
No, we're gonna save her.
184
00:10:49,899 --> 00:10:53,736
Ma'am, we still need
three department head signatures.
185
00:10:53,819 --> 00:10:57,198
-I'll take the lead on signatures.
-I'll take UBO.
186
00:10:57,281 --> 00:10:59,950
You designed her security.
How do we get in?
187
00:11:00,034 --> 00:11:03,663
I'm good at designing security wings,
so you don't.
188
00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:07,625
Only authorized babies and prisoners.
None of us is authorized.
189
00:11:07,708 --> 00:11:10,795
Okay, what about the other thing?
190
00:11:11,754 --> 00:11:12,797
Not happening.
191
00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:17,009
We prepped everything he'll need.
Supplies, change of clothes.
192
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:18,969
They planned for everything.
193
00:11:19,053 --> 00:11:22,181
Did you plan for me saying no?
I'm saying no.
194
00:11:22,264 --> 00:11:25,810
I made a personal privacy shield
so you don't have to watch it happen.
195
00:11:25,893 --> 00:11:29,772
You're a baby, but things still happen
if you don't watch.
196
00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:33,150
-Carol, we've got no other option.
-They've got no other option.
197
00:11:33,234 --> 00:11:34,151
No.
198
00:11:34,235 --> 00:11:36,445
My love, my life,
199
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:40,783
there's a baby stuck
in a mechanized anti-teenager weapon suit.
200
00:11:40,866 --> 00:11:44,412
The only way to rescue her
is if I take a carefully dosed bottle
201
00:11:44,495 --> 00:11:48,499
of age-reducing formula made
by a magic baby corporation in the clouds.
202
00:11:50,084 --> 00:11:52,586
Go save the UBO.
203
00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:55,339
Deploy personal privacy shield.
204
00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:08,394
Woo! Uncuddleable Tim's ready
to be taken prisoner. My armpits stink.
205
00:12:08,477 --> 00:12:11,313
Ow! Pimple in my nostril. I'm so hungry.
206
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:12,898
Oh, my gosh. You're my wife.
207
00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:15,359
You're so pretty. Oh, no. Um...
208
00:12:16,444 --> 00:12:19,738
How's it going?
Wanna see how high I jump a bike?
209
00:12:19,822 --> 00:12:21,907
This is why I said no.
210
00:12:21,991 --> 00:12:23,701
Amal, got a second?
211
00:12:23,784 --> 00:12:26,036
You came. The flyers worked.
212
00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:28,497
Hey, y'all, it's Poetry with Amal.
213
00:12:29,498 --> 00:12:32,460
Yup, that's exactly why we're here.
214
00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:35,045
Hark
Niagara Falls
215
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:38,466
On this day
It calls me
216
00:12:39,884 --> 00:12:43,220
-Thank you. Tina, share.
-My turn. Great.
217
00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:44,847
Dreams are fun
218
00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:45,931
I have them
219
00:12:46,015 --> 00:12:47,099
A ton
220
00:12:47,183 --> 00:12:48,851
You know what isn't fun?
221
00:12:48,934 --> 00:12:51,145
The five percenters' sys-tum
222
00:12:53,898 --> 00:12:56,942
I don't like the treason
your poetry suggests.
223
00:12:57,026 --> 00:13:01,322
-I suggest we hear Pip's poem.
-I didn't prepare any dope rhymes.
224
00:13:01,405 --> 00:13:03,365
Poetry doesn't have to rhyme.
225
00:13:04,783 --> 00:13:06,785
Ugly trees eating soup
226
00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:08,746
Couch wars
A brick that's a toy
227
00:13:08,829 --> 00:13:11,332
I wish swords screamed
When they were being swung
228
00:13:11,415 --> 00:13:12,541
Swinged? Swang?
229
00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:14,835
-Can I stop talking?
-Yes.
230
00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:15,961
That's poetry.
231
00:13:16,045 --> 00:13:19,006
It shakes my core
and lights my soul on fire.
232
00:13:19,757 --> 00:13:22,843
I'm so poet-pumped.
I wanna do something crazy.
233
00:13:23,427 --> 00:13:27,264
Like signing a petition
to end Baby Corp's five percenter policy?
234
00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:29,350
Now we're rocking the cradle.
235
00:13:29,975 --> 00:13:32,978
Amal's in.
Just need Security and Marketing.
236
00:13:33,062 --> 00:13:34,480
How's your thing going?
237
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:40,236
Where is my duck?
238
00:13:44,949 --> 00:13:49,245
I'm Big Jimmy Bearhands,
the Uncuddleable so crazy,
239
00:13:49,328 --> 00:13:51,956
you can't hire me
to babysit without a prescription.
240
00:13:52,039 --> 00:13:54,291
I've come to liberate my duck brother.
241
00:13:54,833 --> 00:13:56,418
I demand to see Curtis.
242
00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:58,837
Well, you got your wish, punk.
243
00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:01,298
Throw him in a high-security cell.
244
00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:05,261
Oh. You caught a non-duck one?
245
00:14:05,344 --> 00:14:07,346
Warm up my UBO fraidy-blaster.
246
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:11,767
And tell that Uncuddleable
to slap on some Buttsnuggers diapers.
247
00:14:11,850 --> 00:14:14,520
He'll be fine. You just cover your end.
248
00:14:14,603 --> 00:14:17,982
With the five percenter system gone,
more babies get love,
249
00:14:18,065 --> 00:14:21,318
which, for a marketing genius
like yourself, seems a no-brainer.
250
00:14:21,402 --> 00:14:22,903
I hate this idea.
251
00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:26,407
I knew it.
He's way too cool for our revolution.
252
00:14:26,490 --> 00:14:27,741
I didn't say that.
253
00:14:27,825 --> 00:14:30,411
What's this revolution called?
254
00:14:30,494 --> 00:14:33,247
Maybe you could give us a name?
255
00:14:34,081 --> 00:14:36,917
Gotta be something catchy
that tells people
256
00:14:37,001 --> 00:14:42,882
we're all about spreading the warmth,
and what we do is gonna change everything.
257
00:14:43,465 --> 00:14:47,344
The Great Medieval London Fire of 1135.
258
00:14:47,761 --> 00:14:49,805
-Eh...
-I love it.
259
00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:51,682
I'm in.
260
00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:58,188
No, it's wearing off?
261
00:14:58,272 --> 00:15:01,609
Not yet. I haven't tried standing
without my knees cracking.
262
00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:10,242
Oh.
263
00:15:10,326 --> 00:15:11,952
-Oh!
264
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:17,041
Oh, yeah. Okay. I popped the cuffs.
What's the plan to get me out?
265
00:15:17,124 --> 00:15:19,793
Rip the door open.
It's a prison for babies.
266
00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:25,591
Where were you last time
Tabitha and I were stuck in those cells?
267
00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:27,760
Don't ask questions, just go.
268
00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:30,179
Twenty paces down the corridor,
then right.
269
00:15:30,262 --> 00:15:31,263
What do you see?
270
00:15:31,347 --> 00:15:36,602
Uh, the gates of heaven,
but decorated by the CIA?
271
00:15:36,685 --> 00:15:40,689
You're there. Door code
is circle-circle-heart-circle-triangle.
272
00:15:44,485 --> 00:15:46,362
I don't think the UBO--
273
00:15:46,445 --> 00:15:48,822
-Tim, watch out.
-Stealth mode.
274
00:15:49,990 --> 00:15:51,575
Tim. Tim.
275
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:53,994
I'm okay.
276
00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:56,246
Stubby-legged devil!
277
00:15:58,123 --> 00:16:00,125
Someone's after UBO. Go.
278
00:16:00,751 --> 00:16:01,794
Security.
279
00:16:01,877 --> 00:16:04,922
Time to fake our deaths
and start fresh with new identities.
280
00:16:05,005 --> 00:16:06,715
I'm feeling like a Cody.
281
00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:11,220
No, Cod-- Pip. Great name.
But we need to finish our mission.
282
00:16:11,303 --> 00:16:14,473
Hammer team to High Security Wing.
Headshark team, with me.
283
00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:18,185
And I-- I--
284
00:16:18,268 --> 00:16:19,687
I gotta go.
285
00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:25,234
We can't get to you. Let us in.
286
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:26,819
I can't.
287
00:16:26,902 --> 00:16:31,573
When I hear your voice,
I think of your face and your button nose
288
00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:34,868
and soft bulbous head.
289
00:16:34,952 --> 00:16:36,370
You have to fight this.
290
00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:44,211
Down the hall. And hurry.
291
00:16:44,294 --> 00:16:47,631
Can you please sound less like a baby?
292
00:16:47,715 --> 00:16:51,260
There should be a button
outside the door. Press it.
293
00:16:51,343 --> 00:16:54,513
And see a bunch of toddling demons?
No, thanks.
294
00:16:54,596 --> 00:16:58,142
Would you prefer to look
at your shoes? I have a limited skill set.
295
00:16:58,225 --> 00:16:59,768
-There they are.
-Get them.
296
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:02,396
Tim, press that button now.
297
00:17:05,149 --> 00:17:06,191
I did it.
298
00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:09,611
-Great work. Somebody get Curtis.
-Protect the UBO.
299
00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:11,822
You, robot suit.
300
00:17:11,905 --> 00:17:14,283
Let the UBO out of there.
301
00:17:14,366 --> 00:17:15,826
Request denied.
302
00:17:15,909 --> 00:17:18,537
Oh, you want this to get nasty?
303
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:20,330
No, you are Baby Corp.
304
00:17:20,414 --> 00:17:22,875
Not when Baby Corp isn't Baby Corp.
305
00:17:25,377 --> 00:17:27,713
Traitor detected.
306
00:17:27,796 --> 00:17:28,630
Traitor?
307
00:17:28,714 --> 00:17:30,424
Pal, look in the mirror.
308
00:17:33,802 --> 00:17:37,514
Ahh! There's a baby inside of me.
309
00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:41,143
Deploy personal privacy shield.
310
00:17:42,478 --> 00:17:45,481
It's all right.
We're getting you out of here.
311
00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:49,610
-Situation update on UBO--
-Got a minute? One sec?
312
00:17:49,693 --> 00:17:51,195
Chitchat. Real quick.
313
00:17:53,238 --> 00:17:56,200
I do not wish to be your airplane.
314
00:17:56,283 --> 00:17:58,410
Oh, come on. I just wanna talk.
315
00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:03,082
No, you want me to join
your subversive anarchist collective.
316
00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:05,751
Why didn't we use that name?
317
00:18:05,834 --> 00:18:06,668
You knew?
318
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:08,629
Security knows everything.
319
00:18:08,712 --> 00:18:10,089
Why didn't you tell?
320
00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:11,965
Your cause is righteous.
321
00:18:12,049 --> 00:18:14,134
The five percenter system is shameful.
322
00:18:14,218 --> 00:18:16,303
-Then you're joining us?
-Never.
323
00:18:16,386 --> 00:18:18,055
-But you just--
-Never.
324
00:18:18,138 --> 00:18:18,972
Why not?
325
00:18:19,056 --> 00:18:24,728
Because I don't know
how to write my own name.
326
00:18:25,896 --> 00:18:28,107
Neither do half the babies here.
327
00:18:28,190 --> 00:18:31,026
Chip drew a weird pizza,
and he's a lawyer.
328
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:36,532
-I can teach you to write your name.
-If I join your revolution, you'd do that?
329
00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:39,493
I'd do that if you don't join.
330
00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:41,829
Sometimes babies just need help.
331
00:18:41,912 --> 00:18:45,582
For now could you just draw a fist?
The meter's running.
332
00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:49,253
Ms. Nannycam, I found UBO.
She's in the board of director's office.
333
00:18:49,837 --> 00:18:53,257
-UBO? Yo, hey, who's seen--?
-She's not here.
334
00:18:53,340 --> 00:18:58,303
Wait a shameful minute.
This UBO breakout was you two?
335
00:18:58,387 --> 00:18:59,555
Just read this.
336
00:19:00,722 --> 00:19:03,016
This is your play?
Go behind my Buttsnuggers?
337
00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:04,601
Have the board get rid of me?
338
00:19:04,685 --> 00:19:06,353
No, you're great.
339
00:19:06,436 --> 00:19:09,773
But it's time to let go
of the five percenter system.
340
00:19:11,525 --> 00:19:14,570
Still room for
one more signature. Join us.
341
00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:19,074
Join the
Great Medieval London Fire of 1135.
342
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:20,701
-Marketing.
343
00:19:20,784 --> 00:19:23,328
Keep your crayon. I won't sign anything.
344
00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:28,000
And what is this legally binding document
I see before me?
345
00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:30,836
Your boardly avatars?
346
00:19:30,919 --> 00:19:34,047
We learned how to videoconference.
347
00:19:34,131 --> 00:19:38,302
-Hail technologic efficiency.
-I'm on my yacht.
348
00:19:38,385 --> 00:19:42,055
Sirs, ma'ams, tablet phantoms,
this is a petition
349
00:19:42,139 --> 00:19:44,349
to end the five percenter system.
350
00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:46,727
Signed by the heads
of all eight departments.
351
00:19:46,810 --> 00:19:51,982
You wish to end the five percenter system
when Baby Corp is thriving?
352
00:19:52,065 --> 00:19:53,650
That's what I'm saying.
353
00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:56,153
Baby Love has never been higher.
354
00:19:56,236 --> 00:19:58,363
Tell them, Board Baby Demarius.
355
00:19:58,447 --> 00:20:02,868
Baby Corp was created
to bring love to all babies.
356
00:20:02,951 --> 00:20:05,370
That's this company's bottom line.
357
00:20:05,454 --> 00:20:10,459
This company's bottom line
has always been its bottom line.
358
00:20:10,542 --> 00:20:15,297
And thanks to the five percenter system,
our bottom line is bounteous.
359
00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:17,841
But we made a petition.
360
00:20:17,925 --> 00:20:22,638
And we thank you
for showing us whom to fire.
361
00:20:27,976 --> 00:20:32,189
Hey, just wanted to say,
I'm sorry it played out this way.
362
00:20:32,272 --> 00:20:35,108
But thank you that it played out this way.
363
00:20:35,192 --> 00:20:39,863
Because I cannot imagine going out
a bigger legend than I am right now.
364
00:20:39,947 --> 00:20:42,199
Keep the UBO and your Uncuddleables.
365
00:20:42,282 --> 00:20:46,286
I'm jumping into
that five percenter Hollywood life today.
366
00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:48,622
Oh, today might not be great.
367
00:20:49,539 --> 00:20:50,666
Feels pretty great.
368
00:20:50,749 --> 00:20:55,295
Yeah, but it's possible
we already delivered your celebrity couple
369
00:20:55,379 --> 00:20:57,047
a more worthy new baby.
370
00:20:58,131 --> 00:21:00,259
-Who is it?
371
00:21:00,342 --> 00:21:01,343
It's them.
372
00:21:01,969 --> 00:21:03,637
I gotta get a picture.
373
00:21:04,471 --> 00:21:07,641
It's a privacy shield hoop curtain,
like we celebrities use.
374
00:21:07,724 --> 00:21:09,601
Let's lower it dramatically.
375
00:21:09,685 --> 00:21:12,688
Shouldn't someone warn them
not to stare too long into--?
376
00:21:12,771 --> 00:21:14,356
Aww.
377
00:21:14,439 --> 00:21:19,111
What a perfectly normal-looking
baby by our standards.
378
00:21:19,194 --> 00:21:21,947
Oh, right. They're incredibly attractive.
379
00:21:22,030 --> 00:21:24,324
Welcome to the family, baby girl.
380
00:22:02,988 --> 00:22:07,784
Stop whining. It's a job.
It's not like the end of the world.
381
00:22:07,868 --> 00:22:12,247
Do what I did when I lost a job I loved.
Start your own. Your way.
382
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:14,708
I've seen great businesses start
383
00:22:14,791 --> 00:22:18,086
with a lot less talent and passion
than I see in this room.
384
00:22:18,170 --> 00:22:21,965
I got recruited to the junior yakuza,
but I'm open to other careers.
385
00:22:22,049 --> 00:22:24,092
I think it's a great idea too.
386
00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:26,428
I'm just scared
to look you in the face to say it.
387
00:22:27,888 --> 00:22:29,723
I'll take care of that.
388
00:22:29,806 --> 00:22:32,976
-Can I set up here?
-What's the Wi-Fi password?
389
00:22:33,060 --> 00:22:35,187
We're actually doing this?
390
00:22:35,270 --> 00:22:37,647
Our own Baby Love company?
391
00:22:37,731 --> 00:22:40,525
You tell me, co-CEO.