1
00:00:13,471 --> 00:00:16,474
-Hold all my-- Whoa!
2
00:00:43,543 --> 00:00:45,628
♪ Grab a high chair
This the family business
3
00:00:49,507 --> 00:00:51,968
It's my--
4
00:00:54,053 --> 00:00:55,138
Oh, yeah.
5
00:00:57,807 --> 00:00:59,392
Oh, yeah.
6
00:01:00,602 --> 00:01:02,729
Today's the big day, right?
7
00:01:02,812 --> 00:01:04,814
Oh, yeah.
8
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:09,819
Let me say happy birthday,
so I don't have to participate in that.
9
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:23,124
So good. If I seem unappreciative,
10
00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:27,337
it's because you can't see
my heart smiling. Talk tomorrow?
11
00:01:29,798 --> 00:01:31,341
Dig in, birthday boy.
12
00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:34,761
Blow out the candle, if you can.
Why'd it be hard?
13
00:01:34,844 --> 00:01:36,471
That's crazy. Just blow.
14
00:01:36,554 --> 00:01:39,808
-Is it a trick candle?
-What? They make those?
15
00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:42,644
Sorry, I'm just not in the mood.
16
00:01:42,727 --> 00:01:44,938
For completely normal candles?
17
00:01:47,148 --> 00:01:49,108
Isn't it amazing?
18
00:01:51,402 --> 00:01:54,197
Die, mesmerizing birthday sorcery!
19
00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:58,034
How are you grumpy on your b-day?
That's like being mad at time.
20
00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:01,287
I know, I'm sorry.
It was a good song and dance.
21
00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:05,375
I'm just not used
to spending birthdays like... this.
22
00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:08,419
In a suit? 'Cause it's Saturday,
and you did have options.
23
00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:09,879
No, as a baby.
24
00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:14,634
Back in my pre-framed-for-embezzlement
days, my parties were legendary.
25
00:02:14,717 --> 00:02:18,346
Everyone used to say my birthday
was like a national holiday but better
26
00:02:18,429 --> 00:02:21,850
-'cause the banks stayed open.
-I doubt everyone said that.
27
00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:24,144
One guy did, in the comments on the video.
28
00:02:24,227 --> 00:02:26,855
-Video? Found it!
-Don't search for--
29
00:02:26,938 --> 00:02:29,899
The Teddy Templeton Birthday Experience?
30
00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:35,196
Years ago, I had my assistant, Jaron,
put together a birthday sizzle reel.
31
00:02:35,738 --> 00:02:38,533
Legendary business tycoon.
32
00:02:38,616 --> 00:02:41,494
Legend. Tycoon.
33
00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:46,291
Good bud. Best friend. Yeah, yeah, yeah!
34
00:02:46,374 --> 00:02:47,625
Great style.
35
00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:48,918
Swanky.
36
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,295
Ooh-la-la!
37
00:02:50,378 --> 00:02:53,506
Bro, I would embezzle
anything for that suit.
38
00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:55,091
And I know embezzling.
39
00:02:56,426 --> 00:02:59,762
In hindsight, it's obvious Bradley
was gonna frame me.
40
00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:01,723
Killer food.
41
00:03:01,806 --> 00:03:04,350
Deep dish.
42
00:03:04,434 --> 00:03:06,352
An improv comedy.
43
00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:08,897
It's all made up.
44
00:03:08,980 --> 00:03:12,150
-Special delivery. It's--
-An answering machine.
45
00:03:12,233 --> 00:03:14,277
Right. An answering machine. Beep!
46
00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:17,572
Hey, guy, filming prohibited!
47
00:03:17,655 --> 00:03:20,366
I'm not allowed to watch
or participate in violence!
48
00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:23,119
That was so much better than our song.
49
00:03:23,202 --> 00:03:29,292
No offense, all I can think about is what
I'd be doing if I wasn't on the run.
50
00:03:30,501 --> 00:03:32,295
You're not.
51
00:03:32,378 --> 00:03:35,632
The FBI is after
Teddy Templeton, the adult.
52
00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:39,802
Boss Baby is free to go
live it up in Chicago all he wants.
53
00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:43,181
You deep dishing
what I think you're deep dishing?
54
00:03:43,264 --> 00:03:47,185
If we leave now, you'll be there in time
for all the best birthday nightlife.
55
00:03:47,268 --> 00:03:49,354
If we leave? Are we talking...?
56
00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:51,439
Brother road trip!
57
00:03:51,522 --> 00:03:53,441
-I'll get the tunes.
-I'm on snacks.
58
00:03:57,737 --> 00:03:59,197
Let's hit the road.
59
00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:02,116
I got rezzies at Chez Big Boeuf
without dropping a name.
60
00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:03,368
A miracle!
61
00:04:03,451 --> 00:04:07,664
If there's one thing Tim Templeton
believes in, it's birthday miracles.
62
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:08,581
Key me!
63
00:04:08,665 --> 00:04:11,584
No, okay, I can't drive.
64
00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:15,046
Your feet work fine. You do gas
and brakes, I'll take the wheel.
65
00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:17,507
-It's every baby's dream.
-Not happening.
66
00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:20,343
-Nice idea, but--
-Why doesn't Mom take Uncle Teddy?
67
00:04:20,426 --> 00:04:21,261
-Bad idea!
-No.
68
00:04:21,344 --> 00:04:24,806
-Great idea.
-Thanks. It's a Tabitha original.
69
00:04:24,889 --> 00:04:29,477
I love your uncle as much as I have to,
but put us alone for hours?
70
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:31,646
-We'll just fight and argue.
-Exactly.
71
00:04:31,729 --> 00:04:36,067
Aw, look at you two
on the same page. Hit that road!
72
00:04:38,152 --> 00:04:41,656
-You'll wanna take--
-I've driven to Chicago, thanks.
73
00:04:41,739 --> 00:04:43,658
Chicago.
74
00:04:43,741 --> 00:04:45,285
Chi-Town.
75
00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:49,539
Old Paris on the Prairie.
The Big Cheese and Caramel.
76
00:04:49,622 --> 00:04:52,542
-City of the Wet Sandwich.
-How about some music?
77
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:54,669
Ooh. An alligator just bit--
78
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:02,302
This is great.
79
00:05:02,385 --> 00:05:06,347
This is the waiting room music
at a tattoo parlor for moms.
80
00:05:06,431 --> 00:05:08,516
Now, this is a road trip jam.
81
00:05:08,599 --> 00:05:10,977
It's my birthday mix, and it kicks.
82
00:05:11,060 --> 00:05:12,478
And it's my birthday.
83
00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:17,191
Industry!
84
00:05:19,902 --> 00:05:23,323
Greatest value!
85
00:05:23,406 --> 00:05:26,117
Did the band forget to show up?
The music is garbage.
86
00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:30,371
That garbage is Wall Street's
top a capella group, the T-Notes,
87
00:05:30,455 --> 00:05:32,582
covering Adam Smith's Wealth of Nations.
88
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:35,001
-Hey, put the T's back on!
89
00:05:35,084 --> 00:05:39,172
No chance. I'm getting through this
as painlessly as possible.
90
00:05:39,255 --> 00:05:41,966
-You think crying will work? I have kids.
91
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:45,344
I do crosswords during tantrums.
Come at me.
92
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:51,476
Never launch anything from the back.
You could've caused a wreck.
93
00:05:51,559 --> 00:05:53,478
I'm an excellent marksman,
94
00:05:53,561 --> 00:05:57,065
-just below distinguished marksman.
-Stop saying "marksman."
95
00:05:57,148 --> 00:05:58,983
-Play my music.
-That wasn't music.
96
00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:02,236
Excellent marksman is above
first-class marksman
97
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:04,697
-and above general marksman...
-You want music?
98
00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:07,408
-...which anyone can be...
-I got your music.
99
00:06:07,492 --> 00:06:10,411
-This isn't the T-Notes--
100
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:13,456
Let's never leave Aruba, Adam Smith.
101
00:06:15,249 --> 00:06:16,250
How dare you!
102
00:06:16,334 --> 00:06:18,336
Did we have a good nappy-nap?
103
00:06:18,419 --> 00:06:23,049
All I asked for today was to not feel
like a baby, and what do you do?
104
00:06:23,132 --> 00:06:26,677
You drug me for transport,
like a common circus rhino!
105
00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:28,262
Would you look up?
106
00:06:31,224 --> 00:06:36,604
Really is the Paris on the Prairie, huh?
So, birthday boy, where to first?
107
00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:40,441
I said viridian.
108
00:06:40,525 --> 00:06:44,320
This is kelly. If I wanted someone
colorblind to fetch me things,
109
00:06:44,403 --> 00:06:45,863
I would've hired a dog.
110
00:06:47,323 --> 00:06:50,660
Milton Livree is the best tailor
this side of Savile Row.
111
00:06:50,743 --> 00:06:52,537
I buy a suit from him every birthday.
112
00:06:52,620 --> 00:06:55,623
Your party, your clown.
I'm just here to push the stroller.
113
00:06:55,706 --> 00:06:58,042
Prepare to see true genius at work.
114
00:06:58,126 --> 00:07:00,962
Milton knows how to dress a man
who knows what he wants.
115
00:07:01,045 --> 00:07:03,840
And I am a man who knows what he wants.
116
00:07:04,465 --> 00:07:05,424
Yes?
117
00:07:05,508 --> 00:07:06,509
Uh--
118
00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:11,389
Of course, the baby can't talk.
119
00:07:11,472 --> 00:07:15,810
If you want a cute outfit
to out-mommy the other mommies,
120
00:07:15,893 --> 00:07:18,729
the baby department is in the basement.
121
00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:21,691
And the shoe department is over there.
122
00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:24,193
-Great meeting you.
-Where you going?
123
00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:26,988
I'm here to push the stroller.
If you can't order--
124
00:07:27,071 --> 00:07:28,156
Order it for me.
125
00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:31,492
Custom travel suit, pinstripes,
peak lapels. Will you just stop?
126
00:07:32,493 --> 00:07:33,828
Hey!
127
00:07:36,038 --> 00:07:39,500
Are you able to control your stroller pet?
128
00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:46,883
Depends. Are you able to make a travel
suit with pinstripes and peak lapels?
129
00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:49,051
-For a baby?
-Ooh!
130
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:53,097
Challenge accepted.
Lay the thing down, and we'll begin.
131
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,683
He's gonna ask questions.
132
00:07:55,766 --> 00:07:58,060
Pay attention, and we'll be okay.
133
00:08:01,522 --> 00:08:02,815
How many buttons?
134
00:08:06,569 --> 00:08:07,403
Two?
135
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,115
Three!
136
00:08:11,199 --> 00:08:14,410
-And you want this in flannel?
-Sure...
137
00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:17,788
...ly not.
138
00:08:17,872 --> 00:08:18,998
Tweed?
139
00:08:19,540 --> 00:08:21,584
That. I think.
140
00:08:21,667 --> 00:08:24,003
Cuffed pants or hemmed?
141
00:08:24,086 --> 00:08:26,172
Uh, one of each.
142
00:08:26,255 --> 00:08:27,882
How unique.
143
00:08:27,965 --> 00:08:30,843
Moving on to footwear.
Where's my shoe horn?
144
00:08:30,927 --> 00:08:33,888
You just designed a suit
for some salesman.
145
00:08:33,971 --> 00:08:36,516
-You wouldn't quit giggling!
-Everything tickles!
146
00:08:36,599 --> 00:08:39,977
Listen to me, Harris Tweed, cuffed pants,
147
00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:43,147
single monk strap,
brown Italian leather shoes.
148
00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:45,775
I can't remember those
meaningless details.
149
00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:47,693
It's my birthday!
150
00:08:48,444 --> 00:08:49,862
Fine. What was it?
151
00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:52,490
Hairy tweed, monkey strap shoes?
152
00:08:52,573 --> 00:08:54,784
I'm in a nightmare.
153
00:08:54,867 --> 00:08:57,286
Found my shoe horn. Ow!
154
00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:58,496
Enough!
155
00:08:58,579 --> 00:09:02,625
I am a bespoke artisan,
not some spittle-rag maker!
156
00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:05,336
Please, Mr. Livree,
157
00:09:05,419 --> 00:09:08,256
I know his order and I know his shoe size.
158
00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:09,966
It's his birthday.
159
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:14,720
All right. It'll be 9000 for the suit.
Payment up front.
160
00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:18,724
-Cool. What can I get for 5?
161
00:09:22,436 --> 00:09:25,690
-It looks nice.
-Of course, you're a hillbilly.
162
00:09:25,773 --> 00:09:28,859
-I would've paid you back.
-How? You're a baby.
163
00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:31,571
Can we go five minutes
without reminding me of that?
164
00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:34,699
You're right, your birthday.
So where to next?
165
00:09:41,455 --> 00:09:43,249
Chez Big Boeuf.
166
00:09:43,332 --> 00:09:45,459
Madame, right this way.
167
00:09:45,876 --> 00:09:47,545
Ooh-la-la. "Madame."
168
00:09:47,628 --> 00:09:50,840
-Play it cool, hillbilly.
-I'm from Dallas!
169
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:55,678
The booth d'triomphe!
I didn't think it was available.
170
00:09:55,761 --> 00:09:57,555
Your table, madame.
171
00:09:59,682 --> 00:10:03,436
Merci, and do you have
a seat for the bundle of joy?
172
00:10:05,896 --> 00:10:07,857
This is nice.
173
00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:09,358
That's nice.
174
00:10:11,068 --> 00:10:14,530
This is a backwoods jail cell
at the intersection of Kitchen Street,
175
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:17,325
Bathroom Ave. and Rue de Back Door.
176
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:21,829
Food's the same, so quit crying.
177
00:10:21,912 --> 00:10:23,664
Is that a baby slur?
178
00:10:23,748 --> 00:10:27,627
This is what I'm talking about, Carol.
It's booth politics.
179
00:10:27,710 --> 00:10:30,504
Just 'cause I can't grow
a mustache or win at peekaboo,
180
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:34,383
-I get the trash and toilet table?
-I couldn't care less!
181
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:38,179
If there was a care bank and I had
an account, it'd be empty, 0.00 cares.
182
00:10:38,262 --> 00:10:39,972
So drop it, I'm starving!
183
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:43,893
Here are the menus,
and please stop yelling at your baby.
184
00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:45,061
Was I yelling?
185
00:10:45,144 --> 00:10:47,772
It's so loud in here, I didn't realize.
186
00:10:47,855 --> 00:10:50,441
Yes, we'd love some bread. Thanks!
187
00:10:50,524 --> 00:10:53,736
-Not another word.
-I'm in menu land. Keep up.
188
00:10:53,819 --> 00:10:57,573
Speaking of, I'll order.
Two of everything, medium rare.
189
00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:01,202
Like I'm paying for $60 steaks.
Choose one, we'll share.
190
00:11:01,285 --> 00:11:03,496
Fine. Wagyu T-bone.
191
00:11:03,579 --> 00:11:07,541
-Of course, he picks the most expensive.
-I picked the best.
192
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:11,087
This is for you too.
We're in the big city.
193
00:11:11,170 --> 00:11:14,632
-Live a little, hillbilly.
-I'm from Dallas!
194
00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:18,135
And we do like our steaks.
195
00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:25,059
Oh, would you look at that?
We're having a moment.
196
00:11:25,142 --> 00:11:27,895
Enjoy your overpriced meat, birthday boy.
197
00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:30,523
-Baby's got a knife!
-Call Child Services!
198
00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:32,525
I got it. Chill your uppity butts.
199
00:11:33,901 --> 00:11:35,194
Moment over.
200
00:11:36,946 --> 00:11:38,781
Mm, mm.
201
00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:40,741
"Give me my sin again."
202
00:11:40,825 --> 00:11:44,120
-Dude?
-It's Shakespeare, hillbilly.
203
00:11:44,203 --> 00:11:48,332
-Call me hillbilly one more time...
-It means, "Me want more!"
204
00:11:48,416 --> 00:11:50,543
-Just cut me off another--
205
00:11:50,626 --> 00:11:52,253
-No. No, no, no!
-What?
206
00:11:52,336 --> 00:11:56,048
-My stupid baby belly is already full.
-Are you serious?
207
00:11:56,132 --> 00:11:58,259
You made me buy the most expensive steak.
208
00:11:58,342 --> 00:12:01,762
How do you think I feel?
I don't even have the meat sweats.
209
00:12:07,184 --> 00:12:08,227
It's all yours.
210
00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:11,313
Fine. Yo, waiter!
Need this back on the grill!
211
00:12:12,022 --> 00:12:14,400
-What are you doing?
-I like it medium-well.
212
00:12:14,483 --> 00:12:18,320
-You won't taste-murder this!
-Mine. I'll eat it my way.
213
00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:20,781
Burnt over a hillbilly trash fire?
214
00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:24,785
Dallas-Fort Worth is the 4th-largest
metropolitan region in the U.S.!
215
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:25,703
Hillbilly.
216
00:12:25,786 --> 00:12:28,372
It's the cultural and economic
powerhouse of Texas!
217
00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:30,624
A 19-block arts district and an aquarium!
218
00:12:30,708 --> 00:12:33,127
I have a master's degree, dumb baby!
219
00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:40,384
Slow down! I got stubby legs!
220
00:12:40,468 --> 00:12:42,928
You got us kicked out of a restaurant.
221
00:12:43,012 --> 00:12:45,681
Uh, I don't remember me yelling at a baby.
222
00:12:45,764 --> 00:12:47,725
That is exactly what you are!
223
00:12:47,808 --> 00:12:50,060
Stubborn, selfish,
loudest voice in the room,
224
00:12:50,144 --> 00:12:52,271
everything's gotta be done your way.
225
00:12:52,354 --> 00:12:55,274
That didn't come from drinking
Baby Corp formula
226
00:12:55,357 --> 00:12:57,943
that shrank you back to toddler size.
Mm-mm.
227
00:12:58,027 --> 00:13:01,071
Teddy Templeton
never stopped being a baby.
228
00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:03,491
Happy birthday. We're going home.
229
00:13:05,242 --> 00:13:06,744
-Give me the keys.
-No.
230
00:13:06,827 --> 00:13:08,954
We have to hit my favorite improv show.
231
00:13:09,038 --> 00:13:11,832
Why would I watch unemployed
people play make-believe?
232
00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:13,792
-I have kids.
-I've been selfish!
233
00:13:13,876 --> 00:13:16,462
This is the birthday tradition
I care about most.
234
00:13:16,545 --> 00:13:17,796
It's right there!
235
00:13:18,839 --> 00:13:23,594
It's not fussy. It's not pricey.
It's just fun. Please.
236
00:13:23,677 --> 00:13:26,222
If you hate it,
we can leave at intermission.
237
00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:31,644
Two tickets for Duran Durango.
238
00:13:31,727 --> 00:13:33,896
No outside food or beverages.
239
00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:37,650
Uh, it's formula. For my baby.
240
00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:39,026
Rules are rules.
241
00:13:39,109 --> 00:13:41,779
I won't change them because some bad mom
242
00:13:41,862 --> 00:13:45,908
decided to bring a baby
to an improv show. At night.
243
00:13:45,991 --> 00:13:47,576
One moment, please.
244
00:13:48,744 --> 00:13:52,081
Bav. He's a real mood.
Leave the stuff, it's fine.
245
00:13:52,164 --> 00:13:54,708
Including the magic juice
that keeps you a baby?
246
00:13:54,792 --> 00:13:58,671
I'll grab a sip at intermish.
Come on, I need laughs!
247
00:14:01,257 --> 00:14:03,008
Improv comedy, huh?
248
00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:06,929
It's off-brand for me.
But there's something about improv.
249
00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:09,682
The unpredictable vibe. The risk-taking.
250
00:14:09,765 --> 00:14:12,601
The guy who framed me
for embezzlement-- Bradley?
251
00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,773
The guy who forced you
to live at our house?
252
00:14:17,856 --> 00:14:21,277
And stole from my company and sent
the federal government after me,
253
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,696
but who's prioritizing, Carol?
254
00:14:23,779 --> 00:14:25,322
-We should go.
-No.
255
00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:29,368
He took my business,
but he's not taking my Duran Durango.
256
00:14:31,537 --> 00:14:33,581
He's looking right at me.
257
00:14:33,664 --> 00:14:35,374
I think he recognizes me!
258
00:14:35,457 --> 00:14:37,626
Maybe from a photo on your desk.
259
00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:40,337
I cut you and Tim out
of all my photos of the girls.
260
00:14:40,421 --> 00:14:43,340
He's mouthing something. Menu? Menu?
261
00:14:43,424 --> 00:14:48,220
-Does he think I'm serving tables?
-He thinks every woman's a waitress.
262
00:14:50,264 --> 00:14:51,348
Ugh.
263
00:14:51,974 --> 00:14:54,184
-Wanna mess with that jerk?
-What?
264
00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:56,103
Beans? Oh, boy.
265
00:14:56,186 --> 00:15:00,024
Nobody knows you as a baby.
Let's have some fun with that.
266
00:15:00,107 --> 00:15:01,984
Now we're having a moment.
267
00:15:02,067 --> 00:15:06,071
I need that map
to chomp town U.S.A., lady.
268
00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:07,573
-Ooh.
269
00:15:07,656 --> 00:15:12,453
Unknown number. Very spicy.
You got the Bradley. Speak at me.
270
00:15:12,536 --> 00:15:14,288
Hello, Bradley.
271
00:15:14,371 --> 00:15:15,789
Teddy. Where are you?
272
00:15:15,873 --> 00:15:19,877
Bolivia. Or is it Zimbabwe?
Or am I TP'ing your lake house?
273
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:24,214
Don't! I was gonna burn
that down and collect on the insurance!
274
00:15:24,298 --> 00:15:26,884
Ugh. Are you ever not a criminal?
275
00:15:26,967 --> 00:15:28,886
-Hello, beautiful humans!
276
00:15:28,969 --> 00:15:32,097
We are your improv entertainment,
Duran Durango.
277
00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:36,852
And remember, in improv,
we never say no, always "yes and..."
278
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:42,107
Your phone's being weird bro--
Bro! You're here at the show!
279
00:15:42,191 --> 00:15:43,567
What? No, I'm not.
280
00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:47,029
Bro, there's an echo.
You totes be in the house.
281
00:15:47,112 --> 00:15:49,198
We love you, Duran Durango!
282
00:15:49,281 --> 00:15:51,492
Heard that. Swing by my tabe.
283
00:15:51,575 --> 00:15:57,790
Sorry I couldn't invite our old buds,
but I had to bring all these FBI guys.
284
00:15:57,873 --> 00:16:01,585
Told you he wouldn't miss
Duran Durango on his birthday!
285
00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:04,171
-Say hi, Agent Browns!
-Hello.
286
00:16:04,254 --> 00:16:06,757
I'm not here. Bye. It's an ambush!
287
00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:10,511
We'll do improv for you.
No scripts, no planning,
288
00:16:10,594 --> 00:16:13,347
everything on the spot,
never to be seen again.
289
00:16:13,430 --> 00:16:16,642
Like an alien abduction
but with more laughs. Hopefully.
290
00:16:19,395 --> 00:16:20,896
They are on tonight.
291
00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:23,524
-It's Bradley! Don't answer it!
292
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:28,487
Hello? Oh!
293
00:16:29,279 --> 00:16:31,699
-Can we get a suggestion...
-Not him.
294
00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:33,283
...to start our show?
295
00:16:33,367 --> 00:16:36,286
Where are you, bro? Give yourself up!
296
00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:37,621
Thank you so much.
297
00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:42,876
Duran Durango presents
"Where are you, bro? Give yourself up!"
298
00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:45,921
I'm here to take you to the opera.
299
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,424
I'm late! I'm late!
300
00:16:48,507 --> 00:16:52,302
Sorry to interrupt your good time,
but the FBI is looking for you!
301
00:16:52,386 --> 00:16:54,555
They're looking for grown-up me.
302
00:16:54,638 --> 00:16:57,933
Eventually they'll get
to this table, check my ID,
303
00:16:58,017 --> 00:17:02,021
-and find out my name ends in Templeton!
-Ugh. Fine. Let's go.
304
00:17:02,104 --> 00:17:04,648
That will look more suspicious!
We need a plan!
305
00:17:04,732 --> 00:17:08,694
You're in Marrakech.
In Morocco. In Africa.
306
00:17:10,529 --> 00:17:14,366
Marrakech! Bav just had
that one at his fingertips!
307
00:17:15,075 --> 00:17:16,201
Okay!
308
00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:22,249
We move one table at a time.
309
00:17:22,332 --> 00:17:26,045
We get behind them
and they'll think they've already ID'd us.
310
00:17:26,128 --> 00:17:27,588
It's what I got.
311
00:17:27,671 --> 00:17:31,425
Honey, will you pass the salad
with your dolphin flippers?
312
00:17:34,678 --> 00:17:37,765
My boss is gonna kill me.
313
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:40,100
I love you too!
314
00:17:46,398 --> 00:17:47,608
I think it worked!
315
00:17:47,691 --> 00:17:49,902
Did we check that irresponsible mother?
316
00:17:50,986 --> 00:17:54,490
The winds of Marrakech
sweep through the city square.
317
00:17:54,573 --> 00:17:56,116
Sweep. Sweep.
318
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,452
Sweep. Sweep.
319
00:17:59,578 --> 00:18:01,330
Sweep. Sweep.
320
00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:02,498
Go!
321
00:18:05,959 --> 00:18:09,838
"Guard the door, Agent Brown."
I hate being the rookie.
322
00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:12,925
Okay. We can hide here until they give up.
323
00:18:13,550 --> 00:18:14,426
Oh, no.
324
00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:20,682
All rise for honorable Judge Jones.
325
00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:25,729
Standing 5'6", 190 pounds,
from Judge University.
326
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:31,568
Ugh. I'll get arrested in earth tones.
327
00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:34,988
You said you didn't need
more special formula until intermission!
328
00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:39,034
-It's not exact science!
-Mr. Templeton? Agent Brown, FBI.
329
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:40,994
-And associates.
-Hello.
330
00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:43,747
I don't wanna go to prison
for harboring a fugitive.
331
00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:46,917
I wanna go for something fun.
Like impersonating the queen.
332
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:48,335
No one's going to prison.
333
00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:56,510
When that opera lady takes the stand,
you take her out with this...
334
00:18:56,593 --> 00:18:57,594
Burrito!
335
00:18:58,679 --> 00:19:02,975
Take her out with this burrito.
Because her career's a wrap!
336
00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:07,396
I would've made a "full of beans" joke,
but I'm not the professional.
337
00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:09,398
Focus! Rooftop exit!
338
00:19:11,775 --> 00:19:15,487
We'll swing across.
I'll go first then send it back.
339
00:19:16,321 --> 00:19:17,489
Teddy!
340
00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:35,966
It's me! Detective Backwards Man!
341
00:19:36,967 --> 00:19:40,179
Egad! Not Detective Backwards Man!
342
00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:45,058
That's right. You thought you could
just leave right now out the door.
343
00:19:45,142 --> 00:19:48,604
The exit of this room, Carol.
344
00:19:48,687 --> 00:19:51,732
Hang on. I know who you are.
345
00:19:52,232 --> 00:19:55,235
It's the waitress
who never brought me those menus!
346
00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:58,238
Investigate why she's so stuck up!
347
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:03,160
The case has come full circle,
wouldn't you say,
348
00:20:03,243 --> 00:20:05,621
Detective Frontwards Man!
349
00:20:05,704 --> 00:20:08,123
It's him! Back-Front-Man! Get him!
350
00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:09,208
Carol, go!
351
00:20:09,291 --> 00:20:11,126
Sorry for ruining what was,
352
00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:14,504
as always, an incredible
Duran Durango show.
353
00:20:14,588 --> 00:20:16,757
Business tycoon Teddy Templeton,
354
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:19,384
your legendary birthday parties
kept the lights on
355
00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:21,220
in this theater for years.
356
00:20:21,303 --> 00:20:26,767
You've always been loyal to improv.
And improv will always be loyal to you.
357
00:20:26,850 --> 00:20:29,478
Ladies and gentlemen, a real treat.
358
00:20:29,561 --> 00:20:32,439
Legendary improv founder Saul Mayes!
359
00:20:37,444 --> 00:20:41,448
That's intermission!
See you at the second act for more!
360
00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:45,577
Let us in. Agent Brown, FBI.
361
00:20:45,661 --> 00:20:48,121
Bav, house manager,
halfway decent improviser,
362
00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:49,498
and law school dropout.
363
00:20:49,581 --> 00:20:51,792
The only way you'll get in
is with a warrant
364
00:20:51,875 --> 00:20:53,919
or with food in lieu of being paid.
365
00:20:54,002 --> 00:20:55,754
And I don't see either.
366
00:20:56,546 --> 00:20:58,757
Your hearts are as kind
as your parents were
367
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,300
about your chosen life paths.
368
00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:02,636
But now we're all trapped. Any ideas?
369
00:21:03,387 --> 00:21:07,474
-We could improv our way out!
-That's a dumb idea, Don!
370
00:21:07,557 --> 00:21:10,018
Back with those menus in a sec, hun!
371
00:21:12,562 --> 00:21:13,855
Real steak!
372
00:21:15,399 --> 00:21:16,984
Hyenas.
373
00:21:17,067 --> 00:21:18,819
No. Artists.
374
00:21:19,611 --> 00:21:23,573
Duran Durango! Go crush that 'prov.
We got it from here.
375
00:21:24,491 --> 00:21:26,660
Who's ready for more improv?
376
00:21:28,495 --> 00:21:29,579
Where is he?
377
00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:32,624
Waitress! You see a business bro in here?
378
00:21:32,708 --> 00:21:34,001
Afraid not, sugar!
379
00:21:40,048 --> 00:21:43,969
And Bradley,
what a pig idiot that guy is!
380
00:21:44,052 --> 00:21:46,263
But that escape? Woo-hoo!
381
00:21:46,346 --> 00:21:48,682
Bet you're glad you're a baby now.
382
00:21:49,516 --> 00:21:51,310
Oh, yeah.
383
00:21:53,437 --> 00:21:55,480
Sorry. One quick stop.
384
00:21:55,564 --> 00:21:57,274
Magalagabagagianos!
385
00:21:57,357 --> 00:22:02,195
-My favorite deep dish! How'd you know?
-I saw it in your birthday video.
386
00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:06,742
You had a rough day. I'm a mom.
I'm a sucker for pouty baby faces.
387
00:22:11,413 --> 00:22:13,373
Save me a slice, birthday boy.
388
00:22:15,459 --> 00:22:18,462
"Pontooning it up
in Lake Geneva this weekend.
389
00:22:18,545 --> 00:22:21,506
Back with slices on Monday. Go State!"
390
00:22:21,590 --> 00:22:23,091
Oh, I'm so sorry.
391
00:22:23,759 --> 00:22:27,095
Oh, no, hey, come on, fight the tears.
392
00:22:27,179 --> 00:22:30,682
I can't. I'm a baby.
393
00:22:34,978 --> 00:22:36,229
Hey, come on.
394
00:22:37,355 --> 00:22:41,068
It's gonna be all right.
It's gonna be all right.