Are you sure about this, Dad?
It was love at first sight, sweetie.
I've never been so sure of anything in my life.
But who is he marrying? Did he tell you anything?
Well, it's, uh,
not Irene over there.
Not Eva either.
Obviously not Blanca.
-And Paula isn't here. -Man, that ended badly.
Oh! Nagore!
After all that complaining about women, this bastard ruins our project.
-Holy shit! Patrick. Hey, Patrick! -Hey!
-How are you? We're still deconstructed! -Hey!
Psst. Is this for real?
Shh! Shh!
No, no, we're all here.
Uh, sorry, this is everyone.
Uh, Pat, whenever you're ready.
We are gathered here today to celebrate a beautiful story of love.
Santi's love for himself.
It's not easy.
It's not easy to find love, especially in these times.
But Santi found it where he least expected.
In himself.
-Is this for real? -Do you have your vows?
Yes, sorry. I'm a little nervous, you know?
-Go for it. -Here we go.
"I, Santiago Peralta, on this journey we call life,
promise to stay adventurous with myself,
to love and respect Santi in sickness and in health,
whether rich or p--"
"Or poor, for all the days of my life."
"Santi's mine until death makes me part from myself."
-The ring. -Yes.
With this ring, I wed myself.
Santiago Peralta.
I now pronounce you your own husband.
Thank you.
Long live the groom.
Yeah!
Thank you.
Thank you very much. Oh!
Only you could come up with something like this.
This is the happiest day of my life.
So, what are you all gifting me?
A voucher for a shrink.
Hey, Patrick's girlfriend is a real smoke show, huh?
So, uh, are you going on a honeymoon too, or is that, uh…
No, no, no, not now, um, but maybe later.
Because we're about to break ground on the commune.
So exciting!
-Finally everything is going well for me. -Shh!
I'm gonna go say hello.
Are you guys next to marry yourselves?
Hmm. I don't love myself that much.
My relationship with myself is more of a situationship.
It won't be long until he divorces himself.
I give him half a year.
How's everyone getting along? I hope you're having fun.
What's going on here?
Buddy, I don't understand what's happening, but congratulations.
For you, I'm glad.
Thank you. Thank you. Well, everybody,
hmm, I brought you all together because I wanted to say thanks.
If it hadn't been for you and the hard times you gave me,
I wouldn't have met the love of my life.
So really, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
-Uh, you're welcome. -And may you both--
-Well, may you find happiness. -I. Yeah. Me, me. Thank you.
I truly am happy.
-Well, enjoy yourselves. See ya. -Aww.
Hey, why didn't it work out between you two?
-Uh, he was missing something. -Right?
-Uh-huh. -I was dumb and young.
Yeah!
Long live the groom!
Suddenly, I sing Maybe because I love myself
And I feel the wind That passes through my hands
Everything is different When I look at myself
I don't understand myself Maybe because I love myself…
Hey. Hi.
How you doing? Seeing anyone?
Well, apart from the Thursday threesome?
Well, I had been dating a guy.
He's married, but he started to get remorseful, and it all fell apart.
I was seeing a prostitute to avoid hurting anyone.
-But it was coerced consent. -Damn!
And also I got involved with my business partner,
a heteroflexible thing.
-Are you dating Rafa? -No, no, no, no, no.
It was a situationship, but things got weird when I popped his cherry.
Well, everything's going great.
Hey, it's great that things seem so much better between you guys.
Ah, yeah. We decided we should be friendly. Mostly for the kids, right?
Yeah, yeah, we're a happy broken family.
And how are things with that chick you're seeing?
-What's her name, again? Tania? -Who the heck is Tania?
Huh?
No, that was nothing more than a silly fling.
I heard it was getting pretty serious. Since Daniela says you can't be alone.
Hey! Wow. My drink. Tasty, so refreshing.
Dad! Dad! Dad!
Oh! Shh! Hey, hey, hey! The bouquet! The bouquet!
Come on, single ladies! Gather around!
Come on! There we go.
All right, whoever catches this will marry herself!
-No! -No way!
ALPHA MALES
In just a few hours, the court will hear from Iñaki Castejón and Daniela Galván
for the alleged crime…
Are you feeling nervous, miss?
No, Patri, I'm so glad.
…and abdicate his political responsibilities.
For the moment, public opinion remains divided.
Some have accused the influencer of filing a false complaint.
While another sector of the population condemns the politician…
…those who question Miss Galván's motives.
You're not wearing that.
All you have to do today is ratify your complaint
and avoid contradicting yourself.
Take your time answering. And whatever you do, don't break down.
If you can shed a tear or two, that's good,
but-- but make it look natural.
You're doing this for all of us, girl.
You're being very brave.
Daniela!
-Luz, this is Elena Velasco. -Yes, come on in.
Mm.
-Good morning. -How are you, Elena? Over here.
Sit down. Would you like something to drink?
No, I'm okay. Thank you.
Well, okay. How can I help you?
Well, I just found out that my husband's unfaithful to me.
With a man or woman?
-Woman, woman. -Woman.
You want a divorce then?
I wanna divorce him and to murder him. To murder her.
I can only help you with the first one, all right?
Community property, any children?
Uh, community property.
-Two children. Daniel and Paula. -Mm-hmm.
Hmm.
That little fucking bitch has destroyed our family.
Well, I prefer to blame the man.
Make a grab for all his money.
He doesn't have much. His bookstore's shitting the bed.
The asshole fell in love with a slut who didn't want anything serious.
It's not a joke.
If you don't want anything serious,
then why destroy other people's lives, you know?
Elena, I--
That slut hit on him by leaving her phone number on a napkin.
A cock teasing little bitch.
-I had no idea that he was married. -Yes, you did.
And you were fine being the other woman.
Now that you can put a face to me, it's not so funny, is it?
I hope you enjoyed yourself.
Having reviewed Mrs. Esther Alonso's claim,
I approve the regulatory agreement signed by both parties,
which regulates their relationship with their children.
The ruling may be appealed within 20 days.
Okay, sign here. The pen.
Okay, it's done.
Well, then. Happy broken family.
Now it's really over.
It feels a bit weird now.
Just act normal, yeah? This week I'm home. Have you done the shopping?
We're out of kiwis and that blackberry jam you like,
but since you haven't been there…
Will you drive me home? Save the bus fare.
Huh? No. Now you're my ex. Figure it out. Huh.
I was joking. The car's in the parking lot.
Good to see you, Your Honor.
Good morning. I'm Santiago.
-Do you remember me? -Of course. Caravan guy.
Stop there. It's a motor home, ugly.
-Rubén, call the police. -There's no need to do that, ma'am.
Look, I'm here because our construction begins in two days.
The only thing is, my surveyor found so much rock.
There is so much rock. We'll have to break it up using atomic jackhammers.
So, for at least a month, starting from eight in the morning,
you'll hear…
But as a gesture of goodwill,
I have here some foam earplugs for the both of you.
The kind that mold to the ear.
Mm! Yeah. It's been a pleasure.
Mm. Have a good day. See you later.
Ready, Manolo?
Let's roll.
You're gonna love the wind tunnel.
It's just like skydiving, but without the risk of cracking your head open
when you hit the ground.
You really don't have to suck up anymore, okay?
We have officially accepted you as a stepfather.
Yeah, come on, you don't have to plan stuff for us. You passed the test already.
Hey, don't annoy him, all right? This one I want to last.
If it seems lame, we can go back home instead.
No, no. They need to get out of the house, for fuck's sake.
Pedro!
Pedrito! Huh?
Hey! Motorcycle horseman.
I look badass, right?
Hey, this is my colleague Manolo.
Uh, this is Tania.
Remember? The girl I've told you so much about.
Ah, yeah-- I mean, Tania. Of course, of course.
Hello, Tania.
Hello, there. Nice to meet you, officer.
Luis, Luis. It's almost like I've known you all my life.
That's how much I've heard about you, Tania.
All right, bye. I'll see you later.
Hey, hang on. Wait!
But did you tell him to stop at any point?
-Yes, of course, but at that moment-- -Did you say it like that? "Stop?"
Yes, I did.
But he didn't listen to you?
No, he listened to me later when I got more aggressive.
Wait a minute. So Mr. Castejón, he then pushed you onto the bed?
Yes.
And at that moment, according to you, he took his member out?
Do you know why?
Um, I… well, I need to tell you the reason?
I'm the one asking questions. I need you to answer.
I would assume that he took out his member to put it into my vagina.
Or into my mouth or some other hole, not too many choices.
-But did he try to remove your panties? -No, not my panties. There wasn't time--
Oh, and then he started licking your breasts?
How long was he sucking your tits, touching your ass, the whole deal?
Well, I don't… I don't know exactly. I wasn't timing it.
Okay, and after everything you just told me,
you went over to his house, right? Why?
Have you read The Ages of Lulu?
-Uh, I don't remember. -No? Oh.
Can we talk?
Uh, I'll just be a moment, Asun.
What happened to you? Your wife showed up at my office building.
I felt really bad, so I had to tell her.
Dude, you don't tell people when you cheat.
If you feel bad, tough shit!
But she noticed. I'm a mess. What am I supposed to say to her?
Say anything else. There are plenty of reasons to be depressed.
-I think about you every day. -Juan Carlos, you left me.
-It wasn't serious to you. -You seemed okay with letting me go.
Hello. Yes, this is him.
I'll be right over.
What now?
Elena jumped off the balcony.
Hey, there.
What the hell did you do to yourself?
I think the beard made kissing me uncomfortable.
But now I'm softer. Feel.
Oh fuck! You're a pain in the ass.
-But let's enjoy it. Nobody's here. -I really care about you, okay?
I love you as much as a heteroflexible man can love another.
But it ends there. I don't feel like you do.
Are you having a hard time accepting your bisexuality the way I was able to?
I'm straighter than ever.
-I'm sure of it. -Oh, sure.
We spend every day together. You like my BJs.
And me and you made love.
I'm not calling you gay, but you don't seem especially straight.
Rafa, we're not together.
Not now and we never will be.
The sooner you accept it, the better for us both.
Hey!
Uh…
-Is this a good time? -Sure. What's up?
Um, well, has Pedro ever mentioned a woman named Tania?
No, he hasn't. Tania? Tania…
Brother, you're a terrible liar.
I'm a policeman. There's a polygraph right here.
Well, when Esther cheated on you, it didn't work so great.
Is there a problem you wanna tell me?
-Pedro has a girlfriend. It's official. -No fucking way.
-Uh-- -But he's breaking up with her.
But he was in the car with her family. I saw them all at a traffic light.
Oh no! Her children, you mean?
Oh yeah, it was like one of those insurance commercials.
No way, no. No fooling around here. We are all committed to this.
-Shit. -Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-What? -What? Nothing.
Now it's my polygraph beeping.
No, no, I'm not dating anyone.
Better not be.
The only thing is I slept with Esther.
What? But what about the divorce papers?
It was right after we signed, in the parking lot.
Just a goodbye fuck then?
-Exactly. -Ah!
But it was really nice.
Stop fucking around!
No, come on. We just finished getting a divorce, dude.
Man, we are all committed to this project.
-Yes, I know. -Luis!
I'm agreeing with you. Calm down.
Have you talked to your friends about your little problem?
Yeah, we talked about it.
Ah. And how did they react to you abandoning them?
I mean, they love me, so it's not gonna be a big deal.
They were hurt, but they'll get over it.
Yeah. So you haven't said anything.
No, not yet, no. But the decision is made. I just need to rip the Band-Aid off.
I don't wanna be the bad guy here, okay?
If you're not sure, go live with your friends,
and we'll just see what happens between us.
Maybe we've been moving too quickly.
Tania, don't be like that. I already told you I love you.
Yeah, after you lied to my face,
and while you were halfway out the door.
It wasn't the most romantic thing I've ever heard.
Tania.
I love you.
Thanks, honey.
I'd love to hear a "me too."
Well, it won't be organic. It has to come out… naturally.
-You want beetroot in your salad? -Mmm!
Well, I guess I'm leaving.
To the bachelor pad?
Yeah, of course.
Kids, say goodbye to Daddy. You won't see me for a week.
Oh, my girl. Mm.
-Goodbye, Dad. -He's not going off to war.
Oh, come on.
-Luis. Luis! -What?
Uh… you don't have to leave.
-The agreement says I'm supposed to-- -Fuck the agreement!
-I wanna be married. -To me or…?
No, to the neighbor. Of course I mean to you.
But… but we just finished divorcing.
Okay, forget it if it's a problem for you.
No, no, no, no, no. Hang on, wait. Let's talk about it.
What about Marimar?
-Uh… -What about Marimar?
She was here.
Yeah, Iris, you reached out to her.
-They were flirting. -What? No, come on.
-We were only talking for a while. -And?
And… and that's it. I confirmed all of my suspicions.
Oh, God.
Marimar is not the love of my life. Marimar was my high school crush.
The love of my life…
is you.
Those snobs over there want a good wine recommendation.
Slap a Pingus on the bill?
Hey, don't go. What's happening?
We can't keep working together. It affects me too much.
Why are you doing this? No, no, no. Bro, it's a packed house.
Raúl, you broke my heart.
Will you buy me out, or should I buy you out?
Rafa, dude, we're too old for drama.
What are you doing? What are you doing? Come on, get out of here.
What's going on here?
Raúl broke up with me.
We'll talk later. We'll talk about this at home.
You never loved me.
We're not a couple, to begin with.
He's a goddamn liar.
He would rather date a prostitute than me.
-Aren't you gay? -Heteroflexible.
-Those pecks I've been giving you? -You wanted to.
Because you were gay.
I am a little gay. The love story between us is very nice.
Now it's a fairy-tale romance?
-Rafa, come on, be quiet. -I'm going.
You're disgusting. Awful.
Hey, where are you going? Not during the dinner rush.
We went to the room holding hands, like two people who have been flirting
and want to kiss in private.
But it was mutual, both of you?
Nothing about you pushing her and throwing her on the bed?
We ended up in bed, but only out of mutual desire.
He's not interrupting.
Did she touch you?
Yes, yes. I mean, both of us touched.
It was an active thing, it was from…. from both sides.
What did she touch?
My crotch. My penis.
I touched her ass, her breasts.
But wait. You didn't take your penis out at all?
No, no, no.
God damn it! He's directing the whole interrogation.
Why stop? If you were having a nice time, why did you stop?
Because it was a bit indiscreet. We were at her ex's house.
Uh, we're not teenagers. So that's why we went to my house.
So if everything felt so natural,
why do you think she felt the need to report it?
Well, thanks to this, she's getting more media attention than ever.
So I guess she's getting some…
Well, this leak is really helpful to us. People are very angry.
I don't remember much because I was high.
But they disappeared for a while, and they left very early.
I believe her. Why would she lie?
Daniela's a heartbreaker, but she's not a liar.
Hey, sis, I believe you.
I'm going to bed.
Hey, chin up.
Why are you here?
I don't know.
How is she?
The awning broke her fall, but she has multiple fractures,
and she injured her spinal cord.
She may never walk again.
I've left a few boxes full of frozen chicken for Rita.
Right. Thank you. Are you moving far from the city center?
-The outskirts of Ávila. -That is far, yeah.
But it's very beautiful with the walls and the food.
It's the convent of Clares.
The convent that makes cookies?
I'm gonna give myself to Christ, the only man who hasn't failed me.
But that seems like a total waste of time.
I agree.
Rita, I'm gonna miss you so much. Aww!
It seems like you'll miss the dog more than you'll miss me.
Raúl, I would wish you well, but I just simply can't.
I know forgiveness is Christian, but I'm only human.
So I'll say fuck you, Raúl.
This case is under investigation.
It's not reality television, for God's sake.
Miss, they're talking about you.
Are you aware that victims of violence might require a more empathetic
and less aggressive form of investigation?
I only asked the victim questions about whatever issues she brought up
in her own complaint.
It's not the questions, but the way you ask them.
Patri, turn it off. Come on.
I'm sorry if anyone was offended by my use of the words "tits" and "ass."
If the complaint itself contains rude terms, that's not my fault.
But you were much more respectful towards the accused
than to the alleged victim.
The accused has the right to lie.
However, the complainant has the obligation
to ratify all the terms of the complaint.
And my job is to go point-by-point,
investigating whether this young lady is lying or not.
Oh no, you got a patriarchal judge.
Are you watching? My blood is boiling.
Yeah, now I feel like talking.
What do you mean, a relationship?
We've been dating for about a month and a half.
And I said "I love you" twice.
She hasn't said it because she's waiting for it to come naturally.
Can you believe this bastard?
Awful, yeah. Yeah, it really feels bad.
-But love is love. -What's that supposed to mean?
There's a small possibility, hmm, that I'm getting back with Esther.
With Esther? Come on, man.
Hey, you betrayed the group as well.
But with a new woman.
God, I can't believe what shit bag friends you are!
-Can't we stop the work until… -Until what?
We'll have to talk to Santi.
You will have to, you pair of bastards! You don't know the meaning of friendship.
The commune is fucked up because of you two!
Fuck.
I think you should be the one to talk about this with Santi.
I'm only the kept man.
Daniela, why did you finally decide to talk?
Well, because I'm the only one who hasn't.
I didn't wanna make it seem like I was taking advantage of the spotlight.
But I won't allow them to criticize me without defending myself.
Do you feel revictimized?
That word does bother me, but sure… yes.
It doesn't feel great to relive a trauma, only to be called a social climber,
a whore and some kind of liar all day long.
Do you have a message to all those women listening
who have suffered a sexual assault and remain silent?
Ladies, don't report anything. Just look what happens.
I broke the heart of a heterocurious guy.
I pissed off a prostitute.
I turned my ex-wife into a nun. Not much progress.
The wife of the guy I was sleeping with found out,
and she jumped off the balcony.
Kicked the bucket?
She bounced off an awning.
Ah.
-She might not walk again. -Holy shit!
Yeah.
So, you also fucked up big time.
-Raúl, take it easy. -I know. I know. It's horrible.
Well, at least you've got your apartment back now.
Are you going to sell it to pay for your commune for sexist pigs?
We'll see what happens with the commune. Pedro has a girlfriend,
and Luis is back with Esther.
They don't know the meaning of heterosolidarity.
They've screwed over me and Santi. Wait until he finds out.
We had a plan, you know. Commitment's commitment.
Mmm!
Hmm?
What's this?
Raúl, the two of us are emotional terrorists.
The best thing we can do is take each other off the market
for the benefit of humanity.
Luz, are you proposing what I think you're proposing?
Raúl, my love, do you wanna get married?
-All right, boys! Get a glass of bubbly! -Yay!
Our commune is officially underway. What a great moment.
Well, who wants to give a toast?
Uh, there's something I wanna say to you before we start.
That's what I've been asking for all along, to be more involved here.
-Tell me. -It's not about the project.
Well, you might say it affects the project.
-In what way? -I have a girlfriend.
What do you mean you have a girlfriend?
Her name is Tania. She's a businesswoman.
She owns a beauty center. She has two children, Nora and David.
We've been dating for a month and a half. Almost two.
It's serious, you know, more than a situationship.
Pedro, buddy.
We have the plot of land. We have the financing,
the construction company.
Do you understand what this is and what it's doing?
It's an excavator. It's digging up dirt, uh-huh.
Because today, we're beginning construction, you ass!
Yeah, maybe I could have spoken sooner.
Of course. You think? Luis, talk to him.
I'm back with Esther.
What? What do you mean back with Esther? You just got divorced from her.
But I've realized she's the love of my life.
But how is that possible
if the love of your life is Marimar, bastard?
-It's Esther. I'm really sorry about this. -Fuck!
Raúl. Raúl, do you hear these two fucking bastards?
Huh? That's great. Huh? Hmm. Hmm.
What?
I'm getting married.
Who are you getting married to?
Last night, Luz put a ring inside my coulant.
-So that you would choke on it. -Huh!
We're taking each other off the market for the sake of humanity.
She proposed to you. That's great.
-It was beautiful. -Unbelievable!
Hey, congratulations!
What do you mean "congratulations"? Fuck this shit!
You're triple crossing bastards!
-That's what you are! Unbelievable. -Santi!
Fucking--
-Right. You've all been talking. -No, no, no.
This betrayal was premeditated.
-No, it isn't. -Of course it was.
-Fucking hell! God damn it! -Listen, it just happened.
-But love is love. -God damn it.
Santi, sorry. Friends are really just a cheap placeholder for a girlfriend.
It's a miracle we spend so much time together.
Santi, I'm sure you'll find someone.
Yes, I found you guys.
Do you understand what commitment is? We had a whole plan, all right?
And you left me alone.
All alone? No. You and yourself are newly married.
Go on a honeymoon somewhere nice, unwind,
and I'm sure when you get back, things will seem different.
But you're coming to my wedding, right?
Mommy!
Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! There she is.
What, my love? What happened?
-Who went down the slide? -Say "Mommy."
-Hello. -Hello.
I've seen you in the park a lot. Are you unemployed?
No, I'm a househusband.
I'm supported by my girl. Well, not my girl, that's patriarchal.
-What is it? -She's right there, playing with my son.
And with my ex, who's his mother.
The three of them really get along.
Hey, you don't feel ashamed of being supported by a girl?
I'm not, actually.
I mean, sometime ago, my friends and I,
we took a course about deconstructing our toxic masculinity.
Oh dear God.
Yeah, at first, I thought it was nonsense.
But hey, little by little, it really got through.
We had to rethink our entire sexist,
patriarchal programming and embrace our vulnerability.
Mm.
-Long live the bride and groom! -It was a wave of new concepts.
Like, uh, avoiding sexist vocabulary,
understanding that monogamy is not the only option…
Hmm?
…and that sexual orientation is flexible.
-What the hell are you doing here? -You gave me a sign.
-Come on, get out of here. Go. Get out. -You gave me a sign.
-Just listen to me. You gave me a sign. -Go! Out!
You know you did. Just let me in.
Like any other revolution, there's been collateral damage.
Along the way, we each faced our demons, our insecurities.
Only to end up right where we started.
But this time, it was by choice.
-We've been forced to think. -Mm! Mm!
Patriarchal culture is toxic because it's not real.
It doesn't feel good.
How many of you consider yourselves sexists?
Hey, I'm not saying it's easy.
We're in the middle of a transition, and we don't know where we're going.
But the important thing is to move forward.
Eh.
What should we have for dinner?
-There's a market. -Ah!
-Right. -Let's stop on the way.
-Or we can order in. -What are you thinking?
Hey, newlywed. How's your honeymoon going?
-Are you still in love with yourself? -More than ever.
Honey, I'm super happy.
Seriously though. Um, I don't need a girlfriend or friends.
Nothing. 'Cause loneliness is a superpower, sweetheart.
-Sir, are you ready to order? -Yes, I'll have the lobster rice, please.
The lobster rice is for two people.
Dad? Hello?
Dad!
Are you there?