1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:09,718 --> 00:00:12,596 [waves crashing] 4 00:00:25,192 --> 00:00:30,864 - I think the fear of death drives a lot of our lives. 5 00:00:37,913 --> 00:00:40,165 We try to suppress it. We try to ignore it. 6 00:00:40,165 --> 00:00:42,542 We try to deny it. We try to distract from it. 7 00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:45,671 But the truth is, our fear of death, 8 00:00:45,671 --> 00:00:49,383 as some experts say, drives all of culture. 9 00:00:55,973 --> 00:01:01,186 This underlying fear of what happens when we die 10 00:01:01,186 --> 00:01:05,524 drives a lot of people's ambitions. 11 00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:08,277 It drives what they do and how they do it. 12 00:01:08,277 --> 00:01:11,947 They want to be immortal. 13 00:01:11,947 --> 00:01:14,950 [upbeat music] 14 00:01:14,950 --> 00:01:21,832 ♪ ♪ 15 00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:30,757 - ♪ I'm a city on a hill, yeah ♪ 16 00:01:30,757 --> 00:01:35,429 ♪ I'm a light in the darkness ♪ 17 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:39,308 ♪ I'm a trumpet blowing down my walls of fear ♪ 18 00:01:39,308 --> 00:01:42,811 ♪ I'm filled with promise ♪ 19 00:01:42,811 --> 00:01:45,564 ♪ I am built to overcome, yeah ♪ 20 00:01:45,564 --> 00:01:50,068 ♪ I have joy in my sorrow ♪ 21 00:01:50,068 --> 00:01:53,947 ♪ And my only motivation is your love ♪ 22 00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:56,783 ♪ I'm your beloved ♪ 23 00:01:56,783 --> 00:02:03,290 ♪ Oh, you walk anew ♪ 24 00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:07,627 ♪ I know ♪ 25 00:02:07,627 --> 00:02:11,298 ♪ What I was made to do ♪ 26 00:02:11,298 --> 00:02:16,011 ♪ Will you increase my ability to be loved ♪ 27 00:02:16,011 --> 00:02:18,805 ♪ ♪ 28 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:24,144 ♪ Will you increase my ability to be loved ♪ 29 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:27,272 ♪ Be loved by you ♪ 30 00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:48,960 - Your personality was changing. 31 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:50,337 - Yeah. - Over weeks. 32 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:52,089 Yeah. 33 00:02:52,089 --> 00:02:54,257 - But it was small, little things that, you know, 34 00:02:54,257 --> 00:02:56,009 you just kind of wonder what that's about. 35 00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:58,345 But you jumped into your novel, 36 00:02:58,345 --> 00:03:00,097 started becoming part of that book 37 00:03:00,097 --> 00:03:01,473 that you had just finished. 38 00:03:01,473 --> 00:03:02,891 - Yeah, I was writing the novel at the time, 39 00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:04,101 and I kind of became one of the characters in the novel. 40 00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:05,435 That's right. 41 00:03:05,435 --> 00:03:07,229 Started seeing people watching the house 42 00:03:07,229 --> 00:03:09,731 and kind of coming after you. 43 00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:13,735 You got to a point where you would not go to a doctor. 44 00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,654 I called your doctor. He wanted you to come in. 45 00:03:15,654 --> 00:03:17,239 I couldn't get you to come in. 46 00:03:17,239 --> 00:03:19,032 You were paranoid and thinking people were after you, 47 00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,827 and then that night, you went to bed, 48 00:03:21,827 --> 00:03:24,121 and thought I heard a noise in the bedroom, 49 00:03:24,121 --> 00:03:26,415 and I thought, well, maybe you're just dreaming, 50 00:03:26,415 --> 00:03:27,833 and I thought I better check. 51 00:03:27,833 --> 00:03:29,876 And there you were, 52 00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,586 you know, just laying there. 53 00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:33,255 [soft music] 54 00:03:33,255 --> 00:03:34,881 - The first thing I saw was the doctor, 55 00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:36,341 and he was hovering over me. 56 00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:38,260 His surgical mask was down. 57 00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:40,637 And he had a concerned look on his face. 58 00:03:40,637 --> 00:03:43,682 And I remember opening my eyes and kind of trying 59 00:03:43,682 --> 00:03:45,434 to figure out where I was, and then hearing him say, 60 00:03:45,434 --> 00:03:46,726 "You're one step away from a coma, 61 00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:48,395 two steps away from dying." 62 00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,564 And even before I was able to process that, 63 00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:52,441 I fell unconscious again. 64 00:03:52,441 --> 00:03:57,737 And so it was, you know, a few days 65 00:03:57,737 --> 00:04:00,240 before I started to come back around 66 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,367 and feel like myself again. 67 00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:05,912 - And then, looking back on all that we went through, 68 00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:09,875 I think back at that time period, 69 00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:15,547 that was where I started to really consider losing you, 70 00:04:15,547 --> 00:04:20,677 and that whatever's going on, if it does take you from us, 71 00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:24,306 his plan is beyond mine, and I can rest in that 72 00:04:24,306 --> 00:04:25,682 and know that I'll see you again. 73 00:04:25,682 --> 00:04:28,477 Yeah, aw, aw. 74 00:04:28,477 --> 00:04:30,437 - But just don't go dying early, okay? 75 00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:34,483 - Okay. - Couple more centuries. 76 00:04:34,483 --> 00:04:37,861 - When you're on your back in the emergency room, 77 00:04:37,861 --> 00:04:41,531 looking into the face of an emergency room physician 78 00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:43,658 who says you're one step away from a coma, 79 00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:47,204 two steps away from dying, and all of a sudden, 80 00:04:47,204 --> 00:04:51,166 this becomes the most relevant thing in the world. 81 00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:53,168 What happens next? 82 00:04:53,168 --> 00:04:55,504 What happens if I close my eyes 83 00:04:55,504 --> 00:04:57,923 and I don't open them again in this world? 84 00:05:05,263 --> 00:05:09,643 Mm, um... 85 00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:18,485 - I have absolutely no idea what happens after we die. 86 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:26,201 - How do you make a movie about Heaven? 87 00:05:26,201 --> 00:05:28,078 That question frightened me. 88 00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:30,038 I think it would take a lifetime. 89 00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:31,915 I think it would take exploration 90 00:05:31,915 --> 00:05:33,792 around the world and different places, 91 00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,460 stories, and cultures. 92 00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:39,589 We had 12 months condensed into 90 minutes 93 00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:41,466 to make this happen. 94 00:05:41,466 --> 00:05:46,346 If we could just touch Heaven for one second in this film, 95 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,682 I think that might be enough. 96 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:52,269 The day I got the phone call from Lee, 97 00:05:52,269 --> 00:05:54,521 I wasn't expecting it, 98 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:57,774 but I knew that it was gonna change everything. 99 00:05:57,774 --> 00:05:59,818 - Hey, Mani. Lee Strobel calling. 100 00:05:59,818 --> 00:06:02,320 Hey, I've got a project I'm working on called 101 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:04,114 "The Case for Heaven." 102 00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:06,116 - Something I've learned in my life throughout the years 103 00:06:06,116 --> 00:06:09,286 is that everybody has a moment of truth. 104 00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:11,288 I think something that's crucial 105 00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:13,164 that we think about is, 106 00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:17,627 if that moment were here, would we be ready for it? 107 00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:19,838 My mother cleaned houses in Malibu. 108 00:06:19,838 --> 00:06:23,049 My dad was a dishwasher when they came to this country. 109 00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:24,467 I was born in an immigrant family 110 00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:25,802 from Guatemala. 111 00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:28,471 I was raised in South Central LA, 112 00:06:28,471 --> 00:06:31,933 definitely not the nicest place 113 00:06:31,933 --> 00:06:33,727 to grow up in. 114 00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:35,979 Though there was all this chaos outside, 115 00:06:35,979 --> 00:06:39,441 whether there were drive-bys, gangs, you know, 116 00:06:39,441 --> 00:06:42,193 even fires, and things burning down during the LA Riots, 117 00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:44,571 inside our house, there was this peace, 118 00:06:44,571 --> 00:06:46,489 there was this joy. 119 00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:49,659 And if I can claim anything to know about God, 120 00:06:49,659 --> 00:06:52,162 it's the fact that he changes everything. 121 00:06:52,162 --> 00:06:55,123 [soft music] 122 00:06:55,123 --> 00:07:02,255 ♪ ♪ 123 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:03,882 - [indistinct] - Here we go. 124 00:07:03,882 --> 00:07:09,054 ♪ ♪ 125 00:07:09,054 --> 00:07:12,140 To compensate for people's fear of death, 126 00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:14,768 they are trying to find some way 127 00:07:14,768 --> 00:07:18,146 to live on beyond their death. 128 00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:20,732 People are terrified of dying, 129 00:07:20,732 --> 00:07:22,233 and that's just all there is to it. 130 00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:24,444 Now, don't get me wrong, if you ask people 131 00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,363 if they're afraid of dying, they'll say no. 132 00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:27,947 In fact, that's what most people do. 133 00:07:27,947 --> 00:07:30,033 The first step to dealing with the fear of death is denial. 134 00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:33,536 I'm just going to ignore the fact that I'm gonna die. 135 00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:35,163 Denial doesn't work without distraction. 136 00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:37,540 You know, there's the old joke, 137 00:07:37,540 --> 00:07:39,542 think about whatever you want for the next two minutes, 138 00:07:39,542 --> 00:07:41,378 but don't think about pink elephants. 139 00:07:41,378 --> 00:07:43,588 Well, everybody knows the answer to that. 140 00:07:43,588 --> 00:07:45,465 The answer to not thinking about pink elephants 141 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:47,092 is to think about blue ones. 142 00:07:47,092 --> 00:07:49,094 In other words, you have to think about something else. 143 00:07:49,094 --> 00:07:53,682 And that's where movies, social media, sports stars, 144 00:07:53,682 --> 00:07:56,142 singing stars, you know, all of this-- 145 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:58,019 that's where these things come in 146 00:07:58,019 --> 00:08:00,480 because it distracts us from the fact 147 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:01,940 that we're going to die. 148 00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:04,317 If you look at almost everything that humans do, 149 00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:06,778 they're doing it as a symbolic attempt 150 00:08:06,778 --> 00:08:08,321 to live on past their deaths 151 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,365 because they're terrified of death. 152 00:08:10,365 --> 00:08:13,159 Everyone on Earth is engaged in some sort 153 00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:15,453 of a symbolic immortality project. 154 00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:17,706 Build something, to write a book, 155 00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:21,126 political activism is an immortality project. 156 00:08:21,126 --> 00:08:22,919 I'm going to change the world. 157 00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:25,630 See, in other words, I'm doing something 158 00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:28,091 to make the world a better place. 159 00:08:28,091 --> 00:08:30,844 Having children is a symbolic immortality project, 160 00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:33,054 and that's the most common one of all. 161 00:08:33,054 --> 00:08:35,807 The trouble with that is that your children 162 00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:37,267 are only half you. 163 00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:38,852 Their children-- your children's children 164 00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:40,645 are only a quarter you. 165 00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:43,231 After 20 generations, 166 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:49,112 there will only be 0.000004% you, 167 00:08:49,112 --> 00:08:50,989 if there's any of you at all because, you know, 168 00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:54,617 genes transfer over in blocks, 169 00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:57,120 and there's regressive genes and dominant genes, 170 00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:59,164 and after just a few generations, 171 00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:02,834 there might not be any of you at all in your offspring. 172 00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:04,627 But there's one more problem. 173 00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:06,963 I've asked my classes all the time. 174 00:09:06,963 --> 00:09:10,925 I'll say, "So how many of you know the first names 175 00:09:10,925 --> 00:09:13,344 of your great-great-grandparents?" 176 00:09:13,344 --> 00:09:16,306 And I think, in all the classes I've asked-- 177 00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:17,974 I didn't write it down, but I think in all the classes 178 00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:19,309 that I've asked, 179 00:09:19,309 --> 00:09:22,520 only three students have ever said, 180 00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:26,232 "I know the first names of my great-great-grandparents." 181 00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:28,526 And then, I ask this follow-up question. 182 00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:30,653 I'll say, "Do you care?" 183 00:09:30,653 --> 00:09:32,197 Nobody cares. 184 00:09:32,197 --> 00:09:35,784 I've never had a student say, "I really wish 185 00:09:35,784 --> 00:09:39,287 I knew the first names of my great-great-grandparents." 186 00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,331 Nobody cares. 187 00:09:41,331 --> 00:09:44,334 - Unfortunately, a lot of people figure, 188 00:09:44,334 --> 00:09:46,377 "I'm gonna go out in a blaze of glory, 189 00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:48,880 "in a blaze of gunfire. 190 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,841 "I'm gonna do something that will make people 191 00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:55,637 "remember my name even if it means blowing up a school 192 00:09:55,637 --> 00:09:57,514 or murdering somebody famous." 193 00:09:57,514 --> 00:09:59,349 - The investigation into the high school massacre 194 00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:01,142 is slow-moving and dangerous. 195 00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:03,144 The two gunmen who went on the rampage 196 00:10:03,144 --> 00:10:06,064 booby-trapped the building and even themselves. 197 00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:09,025 - Mark David Chapman, who murdered John Lennon, 198 00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:12,570 said that he was trying to steal his fame. 199 00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:15,532 He walked past me. 200 00:10:15,532 --> 00:10:18,535 I took five steps toward the street, 201 00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:20,370 turned, 202 00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:25,208 withdrew my Charter Arms .38, 203 00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:28,878 and fired five shots into his back. 204 00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:32,674 - The Columbine killers, the day before they went 205 00:10:32,674 --> 00:10:35,260 on this murderous spree at that high school, 206 00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:38,596 were talking about, "Which director is gonna direct 207 00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:40,390 the movie about our life?" 208 00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:43,351 - Witnesses say they laughed as they fired their weapons, 209 00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:46,396 executing their classmates, who begged for their lives. 210 00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:48,273 - Screaming after they'd shoot up something, 211 00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:50,817 they'd go, "Whoo!" 212 00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:52,819 Just the pleasure for them. 213 00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:57,490 - Some people will commit atrocious crimes 214 00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:59,576 because they want to be remembered. 215 00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:03,329 That's the dark side of symbolic immortality. 216 00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:15,258 What is a soul, 217 00:11:15,258 --> 00:11:18,386 and why include it into your investigation? 218 00:11:18,386 --> 00:11:20,847 - The soul is our spirit. It is our self. 219 00:11:20,847 --> 00:11:25,393 It is the locus of our introspection, 220 00:11:25,393 --> 00:11:28,563 our emotions, our desires, our thoughts. 221 00:11:28,563 --> 00:11:31,941 It is the essential you. 222 00:11:31,941 --> 00:11:34,027 It's our first-person perspective. 223 00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,236 It's "I." 224 00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:37,405 The key question is, 225 00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:41,868 does the soul survive physical death? 226 00:11:41,868 --> 00:11:44,871 When we die, our spirit, 227 00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:47,582 our soul, separates from our body. 228 00:11:47,582 --> 00:11:49,459 So I wanted to look at--what is the evidence 229 00:11:49,459 --> 00:11:51,252 that we have a soul, first of all, 230 00:11:51,252 --> 00:11:53,254 and then secondly, what evidence do we have 231 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,798 that it can survive our physical death? 232 00:11:55,798 --> 00:11:57,800 So in other words, Jesus, on the cross, said 233 00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,969 to the thief next to him that, 234 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:02,055 "Today, you'll be with me in paradise." 235 00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:05,391 Apostle Paul said to be absent from the body 236 00:12:05,391 --> 00:12:07,060 is to be present with the Lord. 237 00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:11,147 So when we die, our spirit, 238 00:12:11,147 --> 00:12:13,316 our soul separates from our body. 239 00:12:13,316 --> 00:12:15,902 And as one philosopher said, 240 00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:19,364 "I am a soul, and I have a body." 241 00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:21,658 I think that's a good way to look at it. 242 00:12:23,284 --> 00:12:26,663 ♪ ♪ 243 00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:30,291 - One of the views that we find being expressed 244 00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:33,252 is that you are your brain, that everything you do, 245 00:12:33,252 --> 00:12:36,881 think, and say originates 246 00:12:36,881 --> 00:12:40,301 and is driven by the neurons in your head. 247 00:12:40,301 --> 00:12:43,554 But is that all that there is to being a human being, 248 00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:46,474 or is there actually more to it? 249 00:12:46,474 --> 00:12:49,268 Well, it's true that we have a brain. 250 00:12:49,268 --> 00:12:52,438 That's very important, but we also have a mind, 251 00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:55,775 and we have this--there's something that it is to be us. 252 00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:58,528 There's something that it is like to be you 253 00:12:58,528 --> 00:13:03,574 that actually neurons alone can't completely explain. 254 00:13:03,574 --> 00:13:09,664 ♪ ♪ 255 00:13:09,664 --> 00:13:12,542 I grew up in a very loving home 256 00:13:12,542 --> 00:13:15,920 in the northeast of England, 257 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:19,632 and it was a setting of which kind of religious beliefs 258 00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:22,844 weren't really talked about either way, 259 00:13:22,844 --> 00:13:26,055 and so there wasn't any particular agenda 260 00:13:26,055 --> 00:13:29,684 or belief system that was being pushed on me. 261 00:13:29,684 --> 00:13:31,894 ♪ ♪ 262 00:13:31,894 --> 00:13:35,231 Probably, I'd say, by the time I was a teenager, 263 00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:38,818 I knew that I wanted to be a scientist. 264 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:41,362 I loved the sciences. 265 00:13:41,362 --> 00:13:45,033 And I remember my biology teacher 266 00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:48,703 handing me a book by Richard Dawkins 267 00:13:48,703 --> 00:13:54,584 about this idea that we are essentially gene machines, 268 00:13:54,584 --> 00:13:56,919 and that the purpose of our lives is 269 00:13:56,919 --> 00:13:59,922 to be DNA carriers, 270 00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:02,300 and I think I absorbed the view 271 00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:04,260 that that must be the only way 272 00:14:04,260 --> 00:14:07,388 of looking at life from other sources as well, 273 00:14:07,388 --> 00:14:10,391 like magazines, and radio, and from other people 274 00:14:10,391 --> 00:14:11,893 that I was meeting. 275 00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:15,772 And you can't be a credible scientist 276 00:14:15,772 --> 00:14:18,066 and believe in God at the same time, 277 00:14:18,066 --> 00:14:21,110 and so I needed to find out whether I was being asked 278 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:24,739 to choose between God and a theory. 279 00:14:24,739 --> 00:14:31,829 ♪ ♪ 280 00:14:31,829 --> 00:14:35,166 Is free will an illusion? 281 00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:37,418 Scientists will have their different views, 282 00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:39,796 but there is one question 283 00:14:39,796 --> 00:14:43,466 that really science isn't able to answer: 284 00:14:43,466 --> 00:14:45,927 why can we think in the first place? 285 00:14:45,927 --> 00:14:48,846 And if the forces of nature are not enough 286 00:14:48,846 --> 00:14:50,640 to explain the human mind, 287 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:53,810 then maybe our explanations for the human mind lie 288 00:14:53,810 --> 00:14:56,938 beyond the forces of nature. 289 00:14:56,938 --> 00:15:02,944 ♪ ♪ 290 00:15:02,944 --> 00:15:05,571 A significant part of my story is 291 00:15:05,571 --> 00:15:08,783 when I was invited to a carol service 292 00:15:08,783 --> 00:15:11,953 around Christmastime when I was at university, 293 00:15:11,953 --> 00:15:15,915 and I was just really moved by the experience 294 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:18,501 of what was happening, 295 00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:21,379 and there was more going on than just the music. 296 00:15:21,379 --> 00:15:25,174 There was something else that really was moving me 297 00:15:25,174 --> 00:15:27,718 on quite a deep level. 298 00:15:27,718 --> 00:15:29,679 ♪ ♪ 299 00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:32,598 What was that? What is that? 300 00:15:32,598 --> 00:15:34,684 And, you know, if all that there is 301 00:15:34,684 --> 00:15:36,686 to this world is physical things, 302 00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:40,481 then there wasn't really a way to make sense of that. 303 00:15:40,481 --> 00:15:47,655 ♪ ♪ 304 00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:52,118 One of the go-tos of those that are trying to say, 305 00:15:52,118 --> 00:15:54,912 "No, there's more to a human being than just their brain," 306 00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:59,041 is the idea that we have these experiences all the time 307 00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:02,170 that are very difficult to describe purely in terms 308 00:16:02,170 --> 00:16:07,675 of physical interactions and physical descriptions. 309 00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:11,137 You know, one example would be coffee. 310 00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:13,097 You know, here we are drinking coffee. 311 00:16:13,097 --> 00:16:17,059 Imagine I were to ask you to describe to me the smell 312 00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:22,106 of coffee purely in terms of physical descriptions. 313 00:16:22,106 --> 00:16:25,359 You know, we might come up with the chemical structure 314 00:16:25,359 --> 00:16:27,236 of caffeine, but that wouldn't 315 00:16:27,236 --> 00:16:30,448 actually get us any closer to the smell of coffee. 316 00:16:30,448 --> 00:16:33,868 Or we might describe what's happening physiologically 317 00:16:33,868 --> 00:16:36,495 as it goes into our body and we digest it, 318 00:16:36,495 --> 00:16:38,039 but that doesn't get you any closer... 319 00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:40,291 - Yeah. - To the smell of coffee. 320 00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:41,834 If you want to understand the smell of coffee, 321 00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,377 you need to smell it, 322 00:16:43,377 --> 00:16:46,005 and this is an example of a quale in the singular, 323 00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,257 or qualia, in its plural. 324 00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:52,094 ♪ ♪ 325 00:16:52,094 --> 00:16:54,972 Life is full of qualia, 326 00:16:54,972 --> 00:16:59,769 and these things cannot be described in physical terms. 327 00:16:59,769 --> 00:17:02,855 They are in a category of their own. 328 00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:05,650 And ultimately, there's the qualia 329 00:17:05,650 --> 00:17:07,401 of what it is like to be you, 330 00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:09,946 the experience-- the first-person experience 331 00:17:09,946 --> 00:17:11,280 of being a human being. 332 00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:15,826 ♪ ♪ 333 00:17:15,826 --> 00:17:18,913 You know, maybe there's a sort of a bigger experience 334 00:17:18,913 --> 00:17:20,831 that is out there. 335 00:17:20,831 --> 00:17:23,584 And if physical descriptions aren't enough, 336 00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:26,045 maybe the ultimate reason for that lies 337 00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,755 beyond the physical. 338 00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:30,549 And where I really kind of land with this is that, 339 00:17:30,549 --> 00:17:32,385 you know, we are conscious, 340 00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:34,971 we have these conscious experiences 341 00:17:34,971 --> 00:17:39,475 because we're made by a god who is himself conscious 342 00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:42,353 in Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, 343 00:17:42,353 --> 00:17:45,356 and who has made a world in which that kind 344 00:17:45,356 --> 00:17:48,609 of consciousness is extended into human beings. 345 00:17:48,609 --> 00:17:51,821 And so we think because God does. 346 00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:54,824 We have a mind because God does, 347 00:17:54,824 --> 00:17:57,201 which is kind of radical, because a lot of people think 348 00:17:57,201 --> 00:18:00,621 to be a Christian or to be a spiritual person 349 00:18:00,621 --> 00:18:02,707 is perhaps to throw out your brain 350 00:18:02,707 --> 00:18:05,334 and start believing impossible things 351 00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:08,087 that have no bearing on life, but actually no. 352 00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:10,256 Actually, to be a thinking person 353 00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:12,967 is to live out what it means 354 00:18:12,967 --> 00:18:15,636 to be made in the image of God. 355 00:18:15,636 --> 00:18:22,560 ♪ ♪ 356 00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:29,525 - A famous old recording engineer-- 357 00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:31,193 his name's Walter Sear. 358 00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:33,571 He had a place called Sear Sound in New York City. 359 00:18:33,571 --> 00:18:36,574 [cello playing] 360 00:18:36,574 --> 00:18:38,701 I read something he said once, 361 00:18:38,701 --> 00:18:43,039 that everything we do in here is a lie 362 00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:45,207 because you've got these two speakers, 363 00:18:45,207 --> 00:18:47,084 these two crappy little speakers, 364 00:18:47,084 --> 00:18:49,378 and you're trying to create these giant worlds, 365 00:18:49,378 --> 00:18:52,590 like you're in a big hall, or you're, you know, 366 00:18:52,590 --> 00:18:54,592 in a giant silo with a drummer. 367 00:18:54,592 --> 00:18:57,595 [dramatic music] 368 00:18:57,595 --> 00:19:01,766 ♪ ♪ 369 00:19:01,766 --> 00:19:03,726 So everything you have to do in here 370 00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:08,731 is extremely calculated to create this illusion 371 00:19:08,731 --> 00:19:11,525 that there's this world coming out of these speakers. 372 00:19:11,525 --> 00:19:14,737 And hopefully, you feel enveloped in them. 373 00:19:14,737 --> 00:19:16,614 - You're gonna have the paper in your hand for this? 374 00:19:16,614 --> 00:19:18,324 - Yeah. Does it look bad if I do? 375 00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:19,283 - I don't-- - I don't mind it. 376 00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:20,534 I don't mind. 377 00:19:20,534 --> 00:19:23,037 - This is real stuff, okay, guys? 378 00:19:23,037 --> 00:19:24,872 - Yeah. - We didn't cut this. 379 00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:26,374 I think I called you on the phone. 380 00:19:26,374 --> 00:19:27,875 I was in Georgia. 381 00:19:27,875 --> 00:19:29,585 I called you, "Hey, Lee, I have this idea." 382 00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:32,254 You know, you had an id--something in your book 383 00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:33,547 about how you went to a concert. 384 00:19:33,547 --> 00:19:34,715 - Yeah. - You know, the experience. 385 00:19:34,715 --> 00:19:36,133 And I was like, 386 00:19:36,133 --> 00:19:37,468 "Hey, Lee, I want to do something at a studio." 387 00:19:37,468 --> 00:19:38,719 What was your first impression? 388 00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:40,137 - Well, I didn't know what to expect. 389 00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:42,223 You know, entering into your thinking process... 390 00:19:42,223 --> 00:19:43,849 - Yes. - Is always an adventure. 391 00:19:43,849 --> 00:19:45,393 Yes. 392 00:19:45,393 --> 00:19:47,478 - And so I just kind of went along for the ride. 393 00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:50,272 And I think there's a couple of ways to look at it. 394 00:19:50,272 --> 00:19:53,150 You know, there's a lot in the Bible about Heaven, 395 00:19:53,150 --> 00:19:56,362 but a lot of it is metaphorical. 396 00:19:56,362 --> 00:20:00,324 A lot of it uses imagery to convey something 397 00:20:00,324 --> 00:20:03,494 that may not be figuratively accurate and so forth. 398 00:20:03,494 --> 00:20:06,038 So we know a lot about Heaven, 399 00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:07,873 but we don't know a lot about Heaven. 400 00:20:07,873 --> 00:20:10,709 And I think ultimately, it's gonna be the kind of place 401 00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:12,211 where you're gonna have to say, 402 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,046 you just gotta go and experience it 403 00:20:14,046 --> 00:20:15,673 to really understand it. 404 00:20:15,673 --> 00:20:19,218 And so today, with this whole musical experience, 405 00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:21,345 which is so alien to my background, 406 00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:23,264 was the kind of thing 407 00:20:23,264 --> 00:20:25,641 that you just kind of had to experience. 408 00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:28,352 - How different in dynamics was it actually hearing it 409 00:20:28,352 --> 00:20:29,854 back through the speakers? 410 00:20:29,854 --> 00:20:32,022 - It's very different because, first of all, 411 00:20:32,022 --> 00:20:34,483 Bob was totally into it 412 00:20:34,483 --> 00:20:36,861 and was kind of sending hand signals 413 00:20:36,861 --> 00:20:39,697 through the glass to the drum player and so forth. 414 00:20:39,697 --> 00:20:41,198 Yeah, yeah. 415 00:20:41,198 --> 00:20:43,117 And the idea that it comes 416 00:20:43,117 --> 00:20:45,411 through some pretty basic speakers, 417 00:20:45,411 --> 00:20:47,413 but then through the system, 418 00:20:47,413 --> 00:20:52,751 that can enrich the sound, and the product that you get 419 00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:56,005 in the end is so much more vibrant 420 00:20:56,005 --> 00:20:59,675 and robust than just listening to somebody play an instrument. 421 00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:03,846 ♪ ♪ 422 00:21:03,846 --> 00:21:06,640 Leslie and I, when we were newly wed, 423 00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:09,477 went to a concert with the Rolling Stones 424 00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:11,687 and with Ike and Tina Turner. 425 00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:15,566 I remember afterwards trying to communicate to a friend 426 00:21:15,566 --> 00:21:17,985 of mine what that was like. 427 00:21:17,985 --> 00:21:21,363 And I'm trying to tell him about the sound, 428 00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:26,035 and the ambience of the room, and the crowd, 429 00:21:26,035 --> 00:21:30,247 and the songs, which songs were played. 430 00:21:30,247 --> 00:21:32,249 And at the end, it was so--at the end, I said, 431 00:21:32,249 --> 00:21:34,043 "Well, you just had to be there." 432 00:21:34,043 --> 00:21:35,920 'cause mere words 433 00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,714 couldn't communicate the whole experience. 434 00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:44,762 ♪ ♪ 435 00:21:44,762 --> 00:21:48,224 A lot of scientists believe that we are just our brains. 436 00:21:48,224 --> 00:21:50,726 We're just a meat computer basically. 437 00:21:50,726 --> 00:21:52,770 Well, there's a lot of implications of that, 438 00:21:52,770 --> 00:21:54,688 and a lot of them are good. 439 00:21:54,688 --> 00:21:57,066 For instance, if we're just a meat computer, 440 00:21:57,066 --> 00:21:59,109 we don't really have free will. 441 00:21:59,109 --> 00:22:01,403 How do you punish someone for doing something illegal 442 00:22:01,403 --> 00:22:02,863 if there's no free will? 443 00:22:02,863 --> 00:22:04,490 He didn't have a choice. 444 00:22:04,490 --> 00:22:07,201 How do you congratulate someone does something great? 445 00:22:07,201 --> 00:22:08,661 It doesn't make sense, 446 00:22:08,661 --> 00:22:10,287 but a lot of scientists believe that. 447 00:22:10,287 --> 00:22:14,959 And yet, we know that we are more than our brain, 448 00:22:14,959 --> 00:22:18,128 that our brain can tell us, if you go to a concert, 449 00:22:18,128 --> 00:22:20,089 which notes were played, 450 00:22:20,089 --> 00:22:22,383 what the temperature of the room was, 451 00:22:22,383 --> 00:22:25,970 and so forth, but it can't convey the experience. 452 00:22:25,970 --> 00:22:28,264 We are more than a meat machine. 453 00:22:28,264 --> 00:22:29,890 We are more than just our brains. 454 00:22:29,890 --> 00:22:31,600 We have a spirit. We have a soul. 455 00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:33,269 We have a consciousness. 456 00:22:33,269 --> 00:22:35,688 It's the seat of our volition, of our emotions, 457 00:22:35,688 --> 00:22:38,107 of our feelings, and so forth. 458 00:22:38,107 --> 00:22:43,195 And you can't open a cell in your brain and say, 459 00:22:43,195 --> 00:22:45,072 "Oh, here's Lee's emotions." 460 00:22:45,072 --> 00:22:47,032 It doesn't work that way. 461 00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:50,536 We are a hyphenated people. 462 00:22:50,536 --> 00:22:52,621 In other words, we are a body, 463 00:22:52,621 --> 00:22:54,456 but we're also a soul, a spirit. 464 00:22:54,456 --> 00:22:56,959 And what's important about that is that, 465 00:22:56,959 --> 00:22:58,669 if that is true, 466 00:22:58,669 --> 00:23:03,299 then it would make sense that if our physical body died, 467 00:23:03,299 --> 00:23:08,554 our immaterial body, that is, our spirit or our soul, 468 00:23:08,554 --> 00:23:10,556 could continue to live. 469 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:18,105 Near-death experiences-- I was a skeptic about it. 470 00:23:18,105 --> 00:23:20,649 Even as a Christian, I was skeptical 471 00:23:20,649 --> 00:23:22,359 about near-death experiences initially 472 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:24,403 until I did the research. 473 00:23:24,403 --> 00:23:26,780 One of the things that John Burke did in his research 474 00:23:26,780 --> 00:23:28,866 when he wrote his book "Imagine Heaven," 475 00:23:28,866 --> 00:23:32,411 about near-death experiences is, he only interviewed people 476 00:23:32,411 --> 00:23:35,456 who had nothing to gain and a lot to lose 477 00:23:35,456 --> 00:23:37,333 by talking about their near-death experiences. 478 00:23:37,333 --> 00:23:38,792 There's two questions, really. 479 00:23:38,792 --> 00:23:43,005 One question is, are we a body and a spirit 480 00:23:43,005 --> 00:23:46,884 or soul, or consciousness, and if we are, 481 00:23:46,884 --> 00:23:49,053 how do we know that consciousness 482 00:23:49,053 --> 00:23:51,555 survives clinical death? 483 00:23:51,555 --> 00:23:54,516 And that's where we get into near-death experiences. 484 00:23:54,516 --> 00:23:56,101 - That's our segue right now. - Yeah. 485 00:23:56,101 --> 00:23:57,936 Which I love, because 486 00:23:57,936 --> 00:23:59,647 as our conversations have developed, 487 00:23:59,647 --> 00:24:04,360 and we're moving through, you know, these topics, 488 00:24:04,360 --> 00:24:06,111 I think the near-death experiences is 489 00:24:06,111 --> 00:24:07,446 the thing that--'cause I was gonna say, 490 00:24:07,446 --> 00:24:08,530 well, how do you prove that? 491 00:24:08,530 --> 00:24:10,491 Yeah. 492 00:24:14,036 --> 00:24:16,872 - For me, it started when I was still an agnostic 493 00:24:16,872 --> 00:24:18,874 and a skeptic. 494 00:24:18,874 --> 00:24:21,210 I was an engineer for a number of years, 495 00:24:21,210 --> 00:24:24,254 and that's kind of how my mind works. 496 00:24:24,254 --> 00:24:27,132 God, the afterlife, all that-- I just didn't know, 497 00:24:27,132 --> 00:24:29,009 and I honestly didn't care. 498 00:24:29,009 --> 00:24:32,513 But my dad was dying of cancer, and someone gave him 499 00:24:32,513 --> 00:24:36,016 the very first research on what's come 500 00:24:36,016 --> 00:24:37,685 to be called near-death experiences. 501 00:24:37,685 --> 00:24:39,853 [soft music] 502 00:24:39,853 --> 00:24:43,190 When someone clinically dies, their heart stops beating, 503 00:24:43,190 --> 00:24:45,275 in some cases, brain waves cease, 504 00:24:45,275 --> 00:24:49,655 and yet modern medicine, or miracle, whatever, 505 00:24:49,655 --> 00:24:52,032 brings them back, and they actually talk 506 00:24:52,032 --> 00:24:54,451 about a life to come. 507 00:24:54,451 --> 00:24:59,039 And that began a whole journey of really exploring, 508 00:24:59,039 --> 00:25:02,167 and questioning, and trying to understand all of this 509 00:25:02,167 --> 00:25:06,046 that has gone on for about 35 years. 510 00:25:06,046 --> 00:25:08,257 These commonalities that people report, 511 00:25:08,257 --> 00:25:10,217 and they report these same commonalities 512 00:25:10,217 --> 00:25:11,760 around the globe-- 513 00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:13,470 how does that actually intersect 514 00:25:13,470 --> 00:25:15,597 with what the Bible says? 515 00:25:15,597 --> 00:25:22,521 ♪ ♪ 516 00:25:24,314 --> 00:25:28,235 In a court of law, you know, if you had ten people 517 00:25:28,235 --> 00:25:30,028 who witnessed an accident 518 00:25:30,028 --> 00:25:32,239 and they all say exactly the same thing, 519 00:25:32,239 --> 00:25:34,450 that's collusion, right? 520 00:25:34,450 --> 00:25:36,785 That would be thrown out 521 00:25:36,785 --> 00:25:39,830 because people would never say exactly the same thing 522 00:25:39,830 --> 00:25:42,166 unless they colluded together to say the same thing. 523 00:25:42,166 --> 00:25:43,917 But if you have ten people 524 00:25:43,917 --> 00:25:45,753 who say slightly different things 525 00:25:45,753 --> 00:25:48,005 from different perspectives, but they all overlap 526 00:25:48,005 --> 00:25:50,632 to make a bigger picture, well, that's a strong case. 527 00:25:50,632 --> 00:25:54,261 I mean, I've personally studied over a thousand of them, 528 00:25:54,261 --> 00:25:57,723 but you have millions all over the globe. 529 00:25:57,723 --> 00:25:59,683 In fact, the Gallup poll did a survey 530 00:25:59,683 --> 00:26:02,519 and found 1 out of 25 Americans has had one 531 00:26:02,519 --> 00:26:04,521 of these near-death experiences. 532 00:26:04,521 --> 00:26:07,775 That's like 13 million Americans. 533 00:26:07,775 --> 00:26:10,360 European Academy of Neuroscience recently did 534 00:26:10,360 --> 00:26:13,197 a study across 35 countries, 535 00:26:13,197 --> 00:26:17,075 and they found that more like one in ten Europeans 536 00:26:17,075 --> 00:26:18,827 have had one of these experiences. 537 00:26:18,827 --> 00:26:21,288 So these are not uncommon. 538 00:26:21,288 --> 00:26:28,504 ♪ ♪ 539 00:26:28,504 --> 00:26:31,507 - In order to show that we have a consciousness 540 00:26:31,507 --> 00:26:36,094 that survives our death, we just need one authentic, 541 00:26:36,094 --> 00:26:39,306 corroborated near-death experience, 542 00:26:39,306 --> 00:26:42,142 and we have a lot more than one of those examples. 543 00:26:42,142 --> 00:26:44,353 My favorite example is Pamela Reynolds. 544 00:26:44,353 --> 00:26:46,355 Here's a 35-year-old woman 545 00:26:46,355 --> 00:26:48,357 who is having a brain aneurysm, 546 00:26:48,357 --> 00:26:52,903 so she had to have a highly unusual operation. 547 00:26:52,903 --> 00:26:55,030 They put her under deep anesthetic. 548 00:26:55,030 --> 00:26:57,908 Her body was cooled to 50 degrees, 549 00:26:57,908 --> 00:27:02,538 and all of the blood was drained from her brain. 550 00:27:02,538 --> 00:27:05,249 Three tests showed that 551 00:27:05,249 --> 00:27:09,336 there was no measurable brain activity whatsoever. 552 00:27:09,336 --> 00:27:13,423 She had devices inserted into her ears 553 00:27:13,423 --> 00:27:16,927 so that all she could hear was 100 decibels of sound, 554 00:27:16,927 --> 00:27:19,847 which is like a subway train going right next to you. 555 00:27:19,847 --> 00:27:21,890 And then her eyes were taped shut. 556 00:27:21,890 --> 00:27:24,309 And all the surgical instruments were shrouded 557 00:27:24,309 --> 00:27:26,228 before the surgery began. 558 00:27:26,228 --> 00:27:28,438 ♪ ♪ 559 00:27:28,438 --> 00:27:33,485 And yet, she was conscious, she said, during that surgery. 560 00:27:33,485 --> 00:27:35,946 Even though there was no measurable brain activity, 561 00:27:35,946 --> 00:27:37,447 she was conscious. 562 00:27:37,447 --> 00:27:41,201 She described witnessing the surgery take place. 563 00:27:41,201 --> 00:27:43,120 She described going through a tunnel, 564 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:46,707 meeting dead relatives, coming back into her body. 565 00:27:46,707 --> 00:27:50,085 She was able to recall specific details 566 00:27:50,085 --> 00:27:52,963 about the highly unusual instruments 567 00:27:52,963 --> 00:27:54,798 that were used during her surgery. 568 00:27:54,798 --> 00:27:57,009 And, even more than that, 569 00:27:57,009 --> 00:28:00,512 she recalls specific conversations 570 00:28:00,512 --> 00:28:03,640 that took place while she was brain-dead, 571 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:05,434 while she was clinically dead. 572 00:28:05,434 --> 00:28:08,270 She remembers one person saying, 573 00:28:08,270 --> 00:28:11,064 "We have a problem. Her arteries are too small," 574 00:28:11,064 --> 00:28:14,735 and a male voice responding, "Go to the other side." 575 00:28:14,735 --> 00:28:18,989 So she witnessed things that she had no way of knowing 576 00:28:18,989 --> 00:28:21,074 unless her consciousness 577 00:28:21,074 --> 00:28:24,161 somehow survived her clinical death. 578 00:28:24,161 --> 00:28:27,456 [breathing] 579 00:28:27,456 --> 00:28:31,710 - Another researcher studied 93 patients 580 00:28:31,710 --> 00:28:36,381 who reported specific details that they encountered 581 00:28:36,381 --> 00:28:38,050 during their near-death experience, 582 00:28:38,050 --> 00:28:39,927 like Pamela Reynolds identifying 583 00:28:39,927 --> 00:28:41,637 the surgical instruments that were used 584 00:28:41,637 --> 00:28:43,805 and the conversations that were spoken. 585 00:28:43,805 --> 00:28:48,435 And what she discovered is that a remarkable 92% of them 586 00:28:48,435 --> 00:28:50,729 were absolutely accurate 587 00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:53,899 in what they verifiably claimed. 588 00:28:53,899 --> 00:28:57,319 Another 6% were largely accurate. 589 00:28:57,319 --> 00:28:59,947 Well, that's almost a perfect record 590 00:28:59,947 --> 00:29:02,324 of these people observing things 591 00:29:02,324 --> 00:29:04,117 that they otherwise could not have observed 592 00:29:04,117 --> 00:29:06,328 because they were clinically dead at the time, 593 00:29:06,328 --> 00:29:11,083 and yet reporting correctly what they had seen. 594 00:29:11,083 --> 00:29:13,043 - One of the commonalities of people 595 00:29:13,043 --> 00:29:16,171 who have NDEs is a life review. 596 00:29:16,171 --> 00:29:19,508 And because time doesn't work the same on the other side, 597 00:29:19,508 --> 00:29:21,885 they often relive their entire lives. 598 00:29:21,885 --> 00:29:23,512 It's like watching 599 00:29:23,512 --> 00:29:27,349 a three-dimensional panoramic replay of your life, 600 00:29:27,349 --> 00:29:31,353 but what they say is they're watching not only everything 601 00:29:31,353 --> 00:29:34,856 they did, but their interactions with other people, 602 00:29:34,856 --> 00:29:39,945 and they can experience how it felt to the other people. 603 00:29:39,945 --> 00:29:41,571 So they're not just experiencing 604 00:29:41,571 --> 00:29:43,031 what they thought and felt. 605 00:29:43,031 --> 00:29:44,408 They're experiencing what others thought 606 00:29:44,408 --> 00:29:46,076 and felt as well. 607 00:29:46,076 --> 00:29:47,869 ♪ ♪ 608 00:29:47,869 --> 00:29:52,457 When I was being interviewed on the news in New York City, 609 00:29:52,457 --> 00:29:56,044 I got an email afterwards from Heidi. 610 00:29:56,044 --> 00:29:58,213 She was a hospice nurse. 611 00:29:58,213 --> 00:30:00,924 And she said, "Hey, I saw you on the news. 612 00:30:00,924 --> 00:30:03,385 "I heard about your book. I've never read your book. 613 00:30:03,385 --> 00:30:04,886 "I don't know who you are. 614 00:30:04,886 --> 00:30:08,432 But that happened to me when I was 16 years old." 615 00:30:08,432 --> 00:30:11,935 And she said, "I grew up in a Jewish home, 616 00:30:11,935 --> 00:30:16,314 "but my father and mother-- they were agnostic atheist. 617 00:30:16,314 --> 00:30:18,817 "My dad used to tell me that, 618 00:30:18,817 --> 00:30:22,029 "'You're no more significant than a speck of dust, 619 00:30:22,029 --> 00:30:24,740 "'and Jesus Christ was the biggest hoax 620 00:30:24,740 --> 00:30:27,117 ever perpetrated on humanity.'" 621 00:30:27,117 --> 00:30:30,454 ♪ ♪ 622 00:30:30,454 --> 00:30:34,708 "When I was 16, my horse reared back, and fell on me, 623 00:30:34,708 --> 00:30:37,586 "and completely crushed my pelvis and my chest, 624 00:30:37,586 --> 00:30:39,755 and I died." 625 00:30:39,755 --> 00:30:42,299 ♪ ♪ 626 00:30:42,299 --> 00:30:46,219 She said, "I was up above my body about 30 feet, 627 00:30:46,219 --> 00:30:49,806 "and I'm watching my sisters freak out, 628 00:30:49,806 --> 00:30:52,184 "and I'm thinking, 629 00:30:52,184 --> 00:30:55,812 I wish my sisters didn't have to watch me die." 630 00:30:55,812 --> 00:30:58,315 She felt great, but she was sad that they had to watch that. 631 00:30:58,315 --> 00:31:00,650 ♪ ♪ 632 00:31:00,650 --> 00:31:03,278 And then she sees a light over her shoulder, she said. 633 00:31:03,278 --> 00:31:06,573 And she turns, and there's Jesus. 634 00:31:06,573 --> 00:31:09,910 She fully wasn't expecting Jesus. 635 00:31:09,910 --> 00:31:13,914 And yet, she said, "I knew this was God. 636 00:31:13,914 --> 00:31:16,458 "And he looked just like Jesus. 637 00:31:16,458 --> 00:31:18,418 And I felt like I had always known him." 638 00:31:18,418 --> 00:31:21,379 ♪ ♪ 639 00:31:21,379 --> 00:31:23,715 Since she was a little girl, 640 00:31:23,715 --> 00:31:26,968 she had always believed in God and had always prayed to God. 641 00:31:26,968 --> 00:31:29,888 And Jesus ends up in this near-death experience 642 00:31:29,888 --> 00:31:31,765 giving her a life review. 643 00:31:31,765 --> 00:31:34,726 And he shows her in the life review, 644 00:31:34,726 --> 00:31:36,770 when she was a little girl praying 645 00:31:36,770 --> 00:31:39,189 and she would feel this sense of peace, 646 00:31:39,189 --> 00:31:42,484 that he was actually the one sitting on her bedside 647 00:31:42,484 --> 00:31:44,319 when she would pray. 648 00:31:44,319 --> 00:31:48,532 She came back from that experience knowing 649 00:31:48,532 --> 00:31:52,202 that Jesus was God, and yet she's Jewish. 650 00:31:52,202 --> 00:31:56,289 And she's been able to see that the Jewish prophets 651 00:31:56,289 --> 00:32:00,335 foretold all about Jesus, and so she's Jewish, 652 00:32:00,335 --> 00:32:03,004 but she believes that Jesus was the Jewish Messiah 653 00:32:03,004 --> 00:32:05,132 who was foretold. 654 00:32:05,132 --> 00:32:08,677 ♪ ♪ 655 00:32:08,677 --> 00:32:11,596 - And so we have a famous case of a woman 656 00:32:11,596 --> 00:32:16,852 who was clinically dead, and she describes how 657 00:32:16,852 --> 00:32:18,812 her soul separated from her body. 658 00:32:18,812 --> 00:32:26,069 ♪ ♪ 659 00:32:26,987 --> 00:32:29,614 She was watching them trying to resuscitate her, 660 00:32:29,614 --> 00:32:33,034 and she floated up through the floors of the hospital 661 00:32:33,034 --> 00:32:34,661 to the roof of the hospital. 662 00:32:34,661 --> 00:32:41,209 ♪ ♪ 663 00:32:41,209 --> 00:32:45,130 When she came back into her body, 664 00:32:45,130 --> 00:32:47,132 and was telling people about this, she said, 665 00:32:47,132 --> 00:32:50,135 "By the way, while I was floating up there, 666 00:32:50,135 --> 00:32:52,596 "on the third-floor ledge of the hospital, 667 00:32:52,596 --> 00:32:55,307 "there's a man's blue tennis shoe 668 00:32:55,307 --> 00:32:58,810 "with some wearing over the little toe area, 669 00:32:58,810 --> 00:33:03,023 "and it's sitting on that ledge 670 00:33:03,023 --> 00:33:06,109 with the shoelace underneath the heel." 671 00:33:06,109 --> 00:33:13,283 ♪ ♪ 672 00:33:14,201 --> 00:33:16,620 Well, then they go up, and they find, 673 00:33:16,620 --> 00:33:18,872 yes, here it is, exactly as she said. 674 00:33:18,872 --> 00:33:25,962 ♪ ♪ 675 00:33:26,504 --> 00:33:27,923 That's corroboration. 676 00:33:27,923 --> 00:33:31,092 That is something she could not have known 677 00:33:31,092 --> 00:33:34,179 if she didn't have a real out-of-body experience. 678 00:33:38,808 --> 00:33:41,645 ♪ ♪ 679 00:33:41,645 --> 00:33:45,190 - I think at first, John decided to write 680 00:33:45,190 --> 00:33:47,442 about the NDEs and about Heaven 681 00:33:47,442 --> 00:33:50,195 using the near-death experiences as part of it. 682 00:33:50,195 --> 00:33:53,657 We knew that it was gonna get a lot of resistance. 683 00:33:53,657 --> 00:33:59,246 And we knew that people would maybe think 684 00:33:59,246 --> 00:34:02,499 that we were going away from Scripture, 685 00:34:02,499 --> 00:34:05,794 or even some of our pastor friends 686 00:34:05,794 --> 00:34:07,629 might not understand 687 00:34:07,629 --> 00:34:11,258 because nobody was really taking theology of Heaven 688 00:34:11,258 --> 00:34:12,926 and the near-death experiences 689 00:34:12,926 --> 00:34:16,012 and showing how they can line up. 690 00:34:16,012 --> 00:34:18,181 ♪ ♪ 691 00:34:18,181 --> 00:34:20,475 You know, John actually gave a talk on this 692 00:34:20,475 --> 00:34:22,477 back in the late '80s 693 00:34:22,477 --> 00:34:24,646 at the University of California, Santa Barbara. 694 00:34:24,646 --> 00:34:26,231 The Christian community was giving a lot 695 00:34:26,231 --> 00:34:27,816 of pushback to this. 696 00:34:27,816 --> 00:34:30,193 People that were sharing their near-death stories 697 00:34:30,193 --> 00:34:33,571 did not get well-received. 698 00:34:33,571 --> 00:34:36,199 And in many cases, they were judged 699 00:34:36,199 --> 00:34:38,326 for what they had experienced. 700 00:34:38,326 --> 00:34:45,250 ♪ ♪ 701 00:34:56,177 --> 00:35:01,766 - My 35 years of research have completely changed my view 702 00:35:01,766 --> 00:35:04,144 from what it was earlier on 703 00:35:04,144 --> 00:35:07,439 of what the life to come is gonna be like. 704 00:35:07,439 --> 00:35:10,942 What I've realized is that every good thing 705 00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:13,361 that we experience on this Earth, 706 00:35:13,361 --> 00:35:16,906 everything we love-- first of all, God created it, 707 00:35:16,906 --> 00:35:18,867 and that's why we love it. 708 00:35:18,867 --> 00:35:22,620 He created it for us to enjoy it and to love it. 709 00:35:22,620 --> 00:35:26,124 But all of it is just a shadow of the real thing 710 00:35:26,124 --> 00:35:29,044 that he created us to enjoy in Heaven. 711 00:35:29,044 --> 00:35:31,921 So all of this life is just a shadow 712 00:35:31,921 --> 00:35:36,134 of the real one we were meant to experience, relationally, 713 00:35:36,134 --> 00:35:39,804 with beauty, with fun and excitement, 714 00:35:39,804 --> 00:35:42,974 with work and pleasure, with all of it. 715 00:35:42,974 --> 00:35:44,768 I mean, the best is yet to come. 716 00:35:44,768 --> 00:35:47,604 ♪ ♪ 717 00:35:47,604 --> 00:35:51,358 In the over a thousand near-death experiences 718 00:35:51,358 --> 00:35:53,068 I've studied, 719 00:35:53,068 --> 00:35:56,821 it's this incredible picture of how, when we die, 720 00:35:56,821 --> 00:36:00,909 we leave our natural bodies, but we're still ourselves. 721 00:36:00,909 --> 00:36:03,787 We have spiritual bodies, and not with five senses, 722 00:36:03,787 --> 00:36:06,122 more like 50 senses. 723 00:36:06,122 --> 00:36:09,084 It's life on steroids. 724 00:36:09,084 --> 00:36:12,545 It's life beyond anything we've experienced. 725 00:36:12,545 --> 00:36:14,881 The colors that people talk about 726 00:36:14,881 --> 00:36:17,550 are the color spectrums far beyond Earth, 727 00:36:17,550 --> 00:36:19,177 but that's what you would expect 728 00:36:19,177 --> 00:36:21,137 because the color spectrum of Earth 729 00:36:21,137 --> 00:36:22,847 is the color spectrum of the sun, 730 00:36:22,847 --> 00:36:24,724 but the color spectrum of Heaven 731 00:36:24,724 --> 00:36:26,226 is the color spectrum of God. 732 00:36:26,226 --> 00:36:28,812 ♪ ♪ 733 00:36:28,812 --> 00:36:31,356 There's this great welcoming committee 734 00:36:31,356 --> 00:36:33,441 of people who have passed on before them, 735 00:36:33,441 --> 00:36:34,943 who are there to welcome them. 736 00:36:34,943 --> 00:36:38,822 And Jesus said, "Use your Earthly resources, 737 00:36:38,822 --> 00:36:41,157 "you know, to make friends, so that when you die, 738 00:36:41,157 --> 00:36:43,743 they will welcome you into eternal dwellings." 739 00:36:43,743 --> 00:36:48,039 It's gonna be life and beauty not unlike Earth. 740 00:36:48,039 --> 00:36:49,582 You know, there are mountains, 741 00:36:49,582 --> 00:36:52,043 and flowers, and trees, and streams, 742 00:36:52,043 --> 00:36:53,962 and all of that's talked about in the Book of Isaiah 743 00:36:53,962 --> 00:36:55,630 and the Book of Revelation. 744 00:36:55,630 --> 00:36:58,508 And that's exactly what near-death experiencers 745 00:36:58,508 --> 00:37:01,469 talk about, except they experience it 746 00:37:01,469 --> 00:37:04,556 in expanded dimensions of space, 747 00:37:04,556 --> 00:37:07,225 more than three dimensions of space, 748 00:37:07,225 --> 00:37:10,937 and more dimensions of time, just like it says in the Bible. 749 00:37:10,937 --> 00:37:12,856 ♪ ♪ 750 00:37:12,856 --> 00:37:15,900 The greatest experience on Earth is just like 751 00:37:15,900 --> 00:37:18,236 a tiny taste compared to the feast 752 00:37:18,236 --> 00:37:20,530 that I believe God has prepared for us, 753 00:37:20,530 --> 00:37:23,950 and I can't wait to discover all these new things. 754 00:37:23,950 --> 00:37:27,662 I mean, imagine a universe of billions of stars 755 00:37:27,662 --> 00:37:30,457 and planets that we thought were beyond our reach, 756 00:37:30,457 --> 00:37:35,128 but what if, in a thought, we can go explore them? 757 00:37:35,128 --> 00:37:38,965 Endless, endless exploration. 758 00:37:38,965 --> 00:37:40,842 ♪ ♪ 759 00:37:40,842 --> 00:37:43,803 [upbeat music] 760 00:37:43,803 --> 00:37:50,727 ♪ ♪ 761 00:37:59,777 --> 00:38:02,530 - I remember one day, on the fourth floor newsroom 762 00:38:02,530 --> 00:38:04,824 of the "Chicago Tribune," one of the copy editors 763 00:38:04,824 --> 00:38:07,202 walked all the way across the newspaper 764 00:38:07,202 --> 00:38:08,870 and looked at me and said, 765 00:38:08,870 --> 00:38:10,872 "Strobel, you're not the best writer in the world, 766 00:38:10,872 --> 00:38:13,541 but doggone it, you're a clear writer." 767 00:38:13,541 --> 00:38:15,502 And to me, that was the biggest compliment 768 00:38:15,502 --> 00:38:17,420 'cause that's what I think good writing really is. 769 00:38:17,420 --> 00:38:23,885 ♪ ♪ 770 00:38:23,885 --> 00:38:26,179 This really represents to me, as you say, 771 00:38:26,179 --> 00:38:28,139 the pinnacle of my journalism career. 772 00:38:28,139 --> 00:38:30,850 I mean, this is back when newspapers mattered. 773 00:38:30,850 --> 00:38:32,602 This is back when our daily circulation was 774 00:38:32,602 --> 00:38:34,604 almost a million every day. 775 00:38:34,604 --> 00:38:36,689 This was back when everybody got the newspaper. 776 00:38:36,689 --> 00:38:38,066 It made a big difference. 777 00:38:38,066 --> 00:38:39,442 And to know that you could write an article 778 00:38:39,442 --> 00:38:41,486 that could change the city, 779 00:38:41,486 --> 00:38:43,947 that could end up with people getting locked up 780 00:38:43,947 --> 00:38:45,907 in prison because of crimes 781 00:38:45,907 --> 00:38:47,534 that had never been exposed before, 782 00:38:47,534 --> 00:38:49,827 political corruption and so forth. 783 00:38:49,827 --> 00:38:52,747 You had a lot of influence back then 784 00:38:52,747 --> 00:38:54,290 that newspapers really don't have today. 785 00:38:54,290 --> 00:38:57,710 ♪ ♪ 786 00:38:57,710 --> 00:38:59,671 I just felt that, 787 00:38:59,671 --> 00:39:01,422 if I could get a front-page byline 788 00:39:01,422 --> 00:39:03,007 in the "Chicago Tribune," 789 00:39:03,007 --> 00:39:05,009 which I had by the end of my first week at the "Tribune," 790 00:39:05,009 --> 00:39:06,719 I had a front-page byline, 791 00:39:06,719 --> 00:39:09,681 that sort of established my credibility, 792 00:39:09,681 --> 00:39:11,808 and it showed that I made something of myself, 793 00:39:11,808 --> 00:39:13,351 that I was successful, 794 00:39:13,351 --> 00:39:15,186 that I was making a difference, 795 00:39:15,186 --> 00:39:16,521 that I was climbing the ladder, 796 00:39:16,521 --> 00:39:18,481 that I was on the road to success. 797 00:39:18,481 --> 00:39:20,984 All that was represented by that little byline 798 00:39:20,984 --> 00:39:22,986 on the front page of the "Tribune." 799 00:39:22,986 --> 00:39:29,909 ♪ ♪ 800 00:39:39,752 --> 00:39:41,713 [sighs] 801 00:39:44,090 --> 00:39:46,759 Everyone wants to be remembered by something, huh? 802 00:39:46,759 --> 00:39:53,683 ♪ ♪ 803 00:39:58,771 --> 00:40:00,815 Before I got into skateboarding, 804 00:40:00,815 --> 00:40:03,610 I was really heavily into BMX, and bikes, and motorcycles, 805 00:40:03,610 --> 00:40:06,821 obviously because I was a huge fan of Evel Knievel, 806 00:40:06,821 --> 00:40:09,657 and the only way that we can emulate Evel Knievel 807 00:40:09,657 --> 00:40:11,200 was on a bicycle. 808 00:40:11,200 --> 00:40:12,535 You know, I used to put the card in the spokes 809 00:40:12,535 --> 00:40:13,995 to try to make it sound like a motor. 810 00:40:13,995 --> 00:40:16,456 I used to buy these plastic gas tanks 811 00:40:16,456 --> 00:40:20,251 to put over my bike to make it look like a motorcycle. 812 00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:23,129 We used to make ramps to try to jump over garbage cans, 813 00:40:23,129 --> 00:40:25,548 pretend like we're jumping cars. 814 00:40:25,548 --> 00:40:27,800 I chose skateboarding 815 00:40:27,800 --> 00:40:31,304 because it really didn't matter how big you were, 816 00:40:31,304 --> 00:40:33,514 how strong you were, how tall. 817 00:40:33,514 --> 00:40:38,436 ♪ ♪ 818 00:40:42,774 --> 00:40:45,318 No, didn't fear God at all. 819 00:40:45,318 --> 00:40:46,944 I didn't believe in God, really, 820 00:40:46,944 --> 00:40:49,238 you know, so at that time, 821 00:40:49,238 --> 00:40:52,784 I didn't really care whether I was going to Heaven or Hell, 822 00:40:52,784 --> 00:40:54,744 or even thought about it. 823 00:40:54,744 --> 00:40:57,664 I had a conversation with an old teammate 824 00:40:57,664 --> 00:40:59,499 from the Bones Brigade days. 825 00:40:59,499 --> 00:41:01,042 His name is Lance Mountain. 826 00:41:01,042 --> 00:41:03,544 He was a teammate of mine on Powell Peralta, 827 00:41:03,544 --> 00:41:05,338 and he's been a devout Christian 828 00:41:05,338 --> 00:41:09,592 ever since I've known him, since the late '70s. 829 00:41:09,592 --> 00:41:13,221 And I remember, I was in his car, 830 00:41:13,221 --> 00:41:14,514 and we were having a debate, 831 00:41:14,514 --> 00:41:17,433 argument about God and about science. 832 00:41:17,433 --> 00:41:21,354 And I don't really remember for sure 833 00:41:21,354 --> 00:41:23,231 specifically what we were talking about, 834 00:41:23,231 --> 00:41:25,566 but basically, I told straight up--I said, 835 00:41:25,566 --> 00:41:28,277 "Hey, Lance, you know, 836 00:41:28,277 --> 00:41:31,072 "I know you want to try to show me something about God, 837 00:41:31,072 --> 00:41:36,244 "and try to make me understand, but I'm not going to, 838 00:41:36,244 --> 00:41:39,455 "you know, 839 00:41:39,455 --> 00:41:43,084 "even think about God or give God the time of day 840 00:41:43,084 --> 00:41:44,585 "unless he reveals himself to me. 841 00:41:44,585 --> 00:41:46,629 "And once he reveals himself to me, 842 00:41:46,629 --> 00:41:50,299 then I'll look into it." 843 00:41:50,299 --> 00:41:52,719 And sure enough, six months later, 844 00:41:52,719 --> 00:41:55,471 he revealed himself, you know, to me in a big way. 845 00:41:55,471 --> 00:42:01,477 ♪ ♪ 846 00:42:01,477 --> 00:42:05,106 I just remember just having my eyes closed, 847 00:42:05,106 --> 00:42:07,817 and then just hearing this voice in my head. 848 00:42:07,817 --> 00:42:09,986 Call my sister-in-law Kathy, 849 00:42:09,986 --> 00:42:13,489 who's married to my brother Eddie. 850 00:42:13,489 --> 00:42:16,033 Out of the blue, I'm like, "Where did that come from?" 851 00:42:16,033 --> 00:42:17,618 You know? 852 00:42:17,618 --> 00:42:19,704 And so I did, you know, 853 00:42:19,704 --> 00:42:22,165 'cause I trusted that voice in my head. 854 00:42:22,165 --> 00:42:23,624 And I said, "You know what? She's gonna give me 855 00:42:23,624 --> 00:42:26,711 the answers that I need." 856 00:42:26,711 --> 00:42:29,380 You know, I had just gone through a divorce. 857 00:42:29,380 --> 00:42:32,133 You know, I was dating. 858 00:42:32,133 --> 00:42:34,427 You know, I wanted something solid again. 859 00:42:34,427 --> 00:42:40,558 And I got together with this woman, 860 00:42:40,558 --> 00:42:42,643 and shared a relationship with her, 861 00:42:42,643 --> 00:42:44,979 and--which was built on trust, 862 00:42:44,979 --> 00:42:48,274 you know, and the trust was broken months later. 863 00:42:48,274 --> 00:42:52,195 I just really couldn't really understand being 40 years old 864 00:42:52,195 --> 00:42:54,864 and dealing with this drama relationship. 865 00:42:54,864 --> 00:42:57,575 And I'm hurt, you know? I'm sad. 866 00:42:59,118 --> 00:43:01,037 I was sad. 867 00:43:09,462 --> 00:43:12,548 Even after all this time, it still hurts. 868 00:43:15,218 --> 00:43:18,012 But she told me--she said, 869 00:43:18,012 --> 00:43:22,016 "Steven, you know, 870 00:43:22,016 --> 00:43:25,728 "you've had all this success, you know. 871 00:43:25,728 --> 00:43:29,315 "You're a famous skateboarder. You've done so well. 872 00:43:29,315 --> 00:43:32,735 But there's something missing in your life, you know." 873 00:43:35,238 --> 00:43:37,156 And I had a feeling she was gonna say 874 00:43:37,156 --> 00:43:40,034 that I needed Jesus in my life 875 00:43:40,034 --> 00:43:42,203 'cause I was calling her for the answers. 876 00:43:42,203 --> 00:43:47,500 And so I was ready to hear it. 877 00:43:47,500 --> 00:43:53,130 My heart was not a heart anymore. 878 00:43:53,130 --> 00:43:59,011 And it turned out to be one 879 00:43:59,011 --> 00:44:01,389 of the greatest decisions I've made in my whole life. 880 00:44:01,389 --> 00:44:04,350 [soft music] 881 00:44:04,350 --> 00:44:06,686 ♪ ♪ 882 00:44:13,442 --> 00:44:14,819 Okay, yeah. 883 00:44:15,528 --> 00:44:17,071 - I wrote it with two friends of mine, 884 00:44:17,071 --> 00:44:19,156 Jason Ingram and Matt Bronleewe, yeah. 885 00:44:21,117 --> 00:44:23,286 - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, yeah. 886 00:44:26,372 --> 00:44:28,624 Yeah, yeah. 887 00:44:46,601 --> 00:44:47,727 Yeah. 888 00:44:50,104 --> 00:44:54,275 - Yeah, When I look back at, like, Hawk Nelson songs 889 00:44:54,275 --> 00:44:58,237 I was a part of writing, I feel complicated about it. 890 00:44:58,237 --> 00:45:01,532 ♪ A little louder, open your heart ♪ 891 00:45:01,532 --> 00:45:04,577 ♪ It's time that we start again ♪ 892 00:45:04,577 --> 00:45:06,329 Sing it out! 893 00:45:06,329 --> 00:45:09,373 On one hand, I'm really proud of the work that we did. 894 00:45:09,373 --> 00:45:11,834 ♪ Love can go, just how deep ♪ 895 00:45:11,834 --> 00:45:14,670 Our goal was always to really encourage people. 896 00:45:14,670 --> 00:45:16,339 And that's still my goal. 897 00:45:16,339 --> 00:45:20,217 So in a sense, there's a throughline there for me. 898 00:45:20,217 --> 00:45:24,680 ♪ He says, "I am for you," yeah ♪ 899 00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:27,850 ♪ "I'm not against you" ♪ 900 00:45:27,850 --> 00:45:34,857 ♪ ♪ 901 00:45:34,857 --> 00:45:37,193 Thank you, EO! 902 00:45:37,193 --> 00:45:39,904 We love you so much! 903 00:45:39,904 --> 00:45:43,866 ♪ ♪ 904 00:45:43,866 --> 00:45:45,451 I grew up 905 00:45:45,451 --> 00:45:47,745 in a very charismatic evangelical setting. 906 00:45:47,745 --> 00:45:49,288 My dad's a pastor. 907 00:45:49,288 --> 00:45:53,626 And he was pastoring a church in southern Ontario 908 00:45:53,626 --> 00:45:56,420 for a lot of the years of my childhood. 909 00:45:56,420 --> 00:45:58,297 As I was growing up, 910 00:45:58,297 --> 00:46:00,091 I got really interested in music. 911 00:46:00,091 --> 00:46:04,345 My musical education was very much in, like, worship teams, 912 00:46:04,345 --> 00:46:06,806 and being a worship leader, and that kind of thing. 913 00:46:06,806 --> 00:46:09,433 And I ended up joining this band, Hawk Nelson. 914 00:46:09,433 --> 00:46:12,937 ♪ ♪ 915 00:46:12,937 --> 00:46:15,856 ♪ Here and now, I'm in the fire ♪ 916 00:46:15,856 --> 00:46:18,401 ♪ In above my head ♪ 917 00:46:18,401 --> 00:46:21,070 Yeah, the idea that it could be a career 918 00:46:21,070 --> 00:46:24,532 was like a dream that was, like, worth chasing, 919 00:46:24,532 --> 00:46:26,450 even if it felt unlikely. 920 00:46:26,450 --> 00:46:29,245 But it did become something that I did for a career 921 00:46:29,245 --> 00:46:31,163 for, you know, 15, 16 years. 922 00:46:39,338 --> 00:46:42,758 - I think, as I was writing that stuff, 923 00:46:42,758 --> 00:46:47,763 it, for me, represented what I wanted to believe. 924 00:46:47,763 --> 00:46:51,600 And when you want to believe something really deeply, 925 00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:56,105 you have periods of time where you sort of can, right? 926 00:46:56,105 --> 00:46:58,983 Like, you sort of can believe that this is true, 927 00:46:58,983 --> 00:47:01,152 and you have experiences, 928 00:47:01,152 --> 00:47:02,778 and you interpret them through that lens, 929 00:47:02,778 --> 00:47:04,155 and you go, like, "Oh, yeah! 930 00:47:04,155 --> 00:47:06,866 "Like, God does love me this much. 931 00:47:06,866 --> 00:47:09,660 And I had this experience, and I kind of felt it." 932 00:47:09,660 --> 00:47:11,537 You know, sometimes, I think there's a trope 933 00:47:11,537 --> 00:47:14,665 that gets trotted out that, like, oh, well, like, 934 00:47:14,665 --> 00:47:16,959 people choose not to believe in God 'cause they just want 935 00:47:16,959 --> 00:47:20,046 to go do some sinnin', and, like, that was not me. 936 00:47:20,046 --> 00:47:22,214 I, like--I really wanted to believe. 937 00:47:22,214 --> 00:47:23,591 And the more I read and learned, 938 00:47:23,591 --> 00:47:24,925 the more I just found 939 00:47:24,925 --> 00:47:25,968 that it was difficult for me to believe. 940 00:47:25,968 --> 00:47:28,679 So that culminated in me 941 00:47:28,679 --> 00:47:31,057 finally feeling like I really needed 942 00:47:31,057 --> 00:47:33,225 to say something publicly because I had been talking 943 00:47:33,225 --> 00:47:35,936 about my faith publicly for so many years 944 00:47:35,936 --> 00:47:39,732 that to talk about this only privately, 945 00:47:39,732 --> 00:47:42,359 and to hide it publicly, felt really disingenuous to me. 946 00:47:42,359 --> 00:47:44,779 So I finally wrote this post. 947 00:47:44,779 --> 00:47:47,948 I posted it on Instagram May 20 of 2020. 948 00:47:47,948 --> 00:47:50,242 And I said, 949 00:47:50,242 --> 00:47:52,119 "I'm finding that I no longer believe in God, 950 00:47:52,119 --> 00:47:54,038 and here's why." 951 00:47:54,038 --> 00:47:58,125 And it was terrifying to post that 952 00:47:58,125 --> 00:48:00,086 'cause I knew my life would change. 953 00:48:00,086 --> 00:48:02,671 And I knew it was gonna affect my family. 954 00:48:02,671 --> 00:48:04,465 I knew it was gonna affect, you know, 955 00:48:04,465 --> 00:48:09,178 like, my parents, my siblings, guys I'd been in a band with. 956 00:48:09,178 --> 00:48:12,515 So you know, I remember posting it, 957 00:48:12,515 --> 00:48:14,100 and then, you know, I hit Post, 958 00:48:14,100 --> 00:48:15,601 and then I literally put the phone down and, 959 00:48:15,601 --> 00:48:17,770 like, walked away, and I was like, "Ahh!" 960 00:48:17,770 --> 00:48:19,522 You know, I think I probably had a beer or two 961 00:48:19,522 --> 00:48:20,689 and, like, relaxed. 962 00:48:20,689 --> 00:48:22,441 You know, like, I need to chill. 963 00:48:22,441 --> 00:48:25,486 But the response was really interesting. 964 00:48:25,486 --> 00:48:31,367 ♪ ♪ 965 00:48:31,367 --> 00:48:33,953 I had a lot of my Christian friends though, 966 00:48:33,953 --> 00:48:37,164 who were very kind and supportive. 967 00:48:37,164 --> 00:48:38,958 And while they didn't agree 968 00:48:38,958 --> 00:48:41,544 with where I was at or my conclusions, 969 00:48:41,544 --> 00:48:43,629 they still cared about me as a person. 970 00:48:43,629 --> 00:48:46,465 And I really appreciated that. 971 00:48:46,465 --> 00:48:49,218 And then I also had a ton of people 972 00:48:49,218 --> 00:48:50,845 who messaged me privately, 973 00:48:50,845 --> 00:48:53,222 and, like, in the first two weeks after that post, 974 00:48:53,222 --> 00:48:57,643 I probably got 10,000 messages from people saying something 975 00:48:57,643 --> 00:49:00,646 along the lines of, "I'm wondering some 976 00:49:00,646 --> 00:49:02,189 "of the same things you're wondering, 977 00:49:02,189 --> 00:49:04,150 and I thought I was the only one." 978 00:49:04,150 --> 00:49:10,030 ♪ ♪ 979 00:49:10,030 --> 00:49:14,326 You know, God--if he's real, he has chosen to make himself 980 00:49:14,326 --> 00:49:17,288 hidden in such a way that we could plausibly say, 981 00:49:17,288 --> 00:49:19,290 "I don't even know if God's there." 982 00:49:19,290 --> 00:49:26,130 And then, with that in mind, in Christianity, 983 00:49:26,130 --> 00:49:28,841 we're often told, well, now you have to make a belief 984 00:49:28,841 --> 00:49:31,802 that God is there, you have to make a decision, 985 00:49:31,802 --> 00:49:35,347 and you have to affirm God's existence and his--you know, 986 00:49:35,347 --> 00:49:37,558 Jesus' lordship in your life. 987 00:49:37,558 --> 00:49:39,143 And if you don't do that, 988 00:49:39,143 --> 00:49:40,895 you're gonna burn in Hell forever. 989 00:49:40,895 --> 00:49:44,231 And I just go, as a father, like, 990 00:49:44,231 --> 00:49:50,070 would I make myself hidden to my son who I love dearly? 991 00:49:50,070 --> 00:49:54,325 Would I hide myself from him his entire life, 992 00:49:54,325 --> 00:49:57,286 and then if he denies my existence 993 00:49:57,286 --> 00:49:59,747 or doesn't, like, love me enough, 994 00:49:59,747 --> 00:50:02,416 or the right way, or believe the right things about me, 995 00:50:02,416 --> 00:50:04,168 burn him forever? 996 00:50:04,168 --> 00:50:06,503 Like, no one would look at a parent 997 00:50:06,503 --> 00:50:09,089 and say, like, "That's a good parent." 998 00:50:09,089 --> 00:50:11,884 And, you know, that's one of the reasons 999 00:50:11,884 --> 00:50:16,180 that I just--I cannot believe in this whole structure 1000 00:50:16,180 --> 00:50:19,475 of way of looking at God and eternity. 1001 00:50:19,475 --> 00:50:21,310 It just doesn't work for me. 1002 00:50:21,310 --> 00:50:24,396 And if that is true, that God is not loving. 1003 00:50:24,396 --> 00:50:28,984 ♪ ♪ 1004 00:50:28,984 --> 00:50:33,364 I think some people have a lot of anxiety about Hell. 1005 00:50:33,364 --> 00:50:35,324 If we're gonna believe 1006 00:50:35,324 --> 00:50:37,534 that there is this eternal conscious torment 1007 00:50:37,534 --> 00:50:40,120 that's a punishment for not believing the right things, 1008 00:50:40,120 --> 00:50:43,832 then it's sort of like there's a gun to your head. 1009 00:50:43,832 --> 00:50:48,587 I don't believe that an all-powerful and all-loving God 1010 00:50:48,587 --> 00:50:51,548 is compatible with the idea of Hell in the way 1011 00:50:51,548 --> 00:50:53,008 that we often think about it. 1012 00:50:53,008 --> 00:50:55,386 I think those two things are incompatible. 1013 00:50:59,556 --> 00:51:03,811 - I have absolutely no idea what happens after we die. 1014 00:51:03,811 --> 00:51:06,355 I haven't been there. 1015 00:51:06,355 --> 00:51:13,279 ♪ ♪ 1016 00:51:18,284 --> 00:51:19,994 - What would you say to someone 1017 00:51:19,994 --> 00:51:21,662 whose loved one died, 1018 00:51:21,662 --> 00:51:24,081 and they don't know whether they accepted Christ? 1019 00:51:24,081 --> 00:51:26,166 What do you say to that? 1020 00:51:26,166 --> 00:51:27,918 - You know, the truth is, we don't know 1021 00:51:27,918 --> 00:51:29,878 what happens in those final moments 1022 00:51:29,878 --> 00:51:31,630 before a person dies. 1023 00:51:31,630 --> 00:51:33,882 We don't know how many people call out to God 1024 00:51:33,882 --> 00:51:36,385 and say "save me" in those final moments. 1025 00:51:36,385 --> 00:51:39,179 My brother was an atheist, an outspoken atheist, 1026 00:51:39,179 --> 00:51:43,559 virtually his entire life, and he died not long ago, 1027 00:51:43,559 --> 00:51:45,811 right at the beginning of the COVID crisis. 1028 00:51:45,811 --> 00:51:47,896 I don't know what happened in that day. 1029 00:51:47,896 --> 00:51:51,692 I hope he reached out to God, but I don't know. 1030 00:51:51,692 --> 00:51:53,694 I'll find out someday in Heaven. 1031 00:51:53,694 --> 00:52:00,617 ♪ ♪ 1032 00:53:05,516 --> 00:53:08,394 You know, C.S. Lewis said if there was any doctrine 1033 00:53:08,394 --> 00:53:11,563 of Christianity he wishes he could change or eliminate, 1034 00:53:11,563 --> 00:53:13,899 it would be Hell, and I get that. 1035 00:53:13,899 --> 00:53:15,734 It's a difficult concept. 1036 00:53:15,734 --> 00:53:18,404 It's much better and more fun to talk about Heaven, I think. 1037 00:53:18,404 --> 00:53:20,614 But there are a lot of misconceptions 1038 00:53:20,614 --> 00:53:22,574 about Hell that confuse people. 1039 00:53:22,574 --> 00:53:26,286 First of all, God does not send people to Hell. 1040 00:53:26,286 --> 00:53:29,498 In a sense, we send ourselves to Hell. 1041 00:53:29,498 --> 00:53:31,250 The Bible says explicitly that God 1042 00:53:31,250 --> 00:53:33,252 does not want anyone to perish. 1043 00:53:33,252 --> 00:53:34,878 He wants everyone to come to repentance. 1044 00:53:34,878 --> 00:53:36,463 He wants everyone to come to faith. 1045 00:53:36,463 --> 00:53:39,466 He wants everyone to experience Heaven 1046 00:53:39,466 --> 00:53:42,302 with him forever, but like any gift, 1047 00:53:42,302 --> 00:53:44,388 it's only ours when we receive it. 1048 00:53:44,388 --> 00:53:46,807 You know, God gave us free will. 1049 00:53:46,807 --> 00:53:48,559 It's like, if we're drowning, 1050 00:53:48,559 --> 00:53:50,310 and someone throws us a life preserver, 1051 00:53:50,310 --> 00:53:52,563 it's up to us whether we want to clutch it or not. 1052 00:53:52,563 --> 00:53:54,231 And so we have free will. 1053 00:53:54,231 --> 00:53:56,316 We could decide we want to live without God, 1054 00:53:56,316 --> 00:53:58,485 we want to ignore God, we want to reject God, 1055 00:53:58,485 --> 00:54:00,696 we want to live in a way 1056 00:54:00,696 --> 00:54:02,281 that we know God would not approve of, 1057 00:54:02,281 --> 00:54:04,491 so we don't want God to be part of our lives, 1058 00:54:04,491 --> 00:54:07,161 and we shun him during our lifetime, 1059 00:54:07,161 --> 00:54:10,080 and at the end of our life, God will say to us, 1060 00:54:10,080 --> 00:54:13,125 "You chose to be separate from me your entire life, 1061 00:54:13,125 --> 00:54:17,713 and now you will be separated from me for eternity in Hell." 1062 00:54:17,713 --> 00:54:20,257 ♪ ♪ 1063 00:54:20,257 --> 00:54:22,551 Hell is not a torture chamber. 1064 00:54:22,551 --> 00:54:25,846 Torture is imposed from without. 1065 00:54:25,846 --> 00:54:29,725 Hell is more about torment, where it comes from within. 1066 00:54:29,725 --> 00:54:31,560 It's a sense of regret. It's a sense a anger. 1067 00:54:31,560 --> 00:54:33,312 It's a sense of loss. 1068 00:54:33,312 --> 00:54:36,607 It's a sense of suffering that people have 1069 00:54:36,607 --> 00:54:39,485 because of the predicament that they find themselves in, 1070 00:54:39,485 --> 00:54:41,820 that they themselves have opened the door to. 1071 00:54:41,820 --> 00:54:44,323 ♪ ♪ 1072 00:54:44,323 --> 00:54:46,200 People think that Hell is 1073 00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:48,869 kind of a one-size-fits-all experience. 1074 00:54:48,869 --> 00:54:52,456 And yet, we know from the New Testament of the Bible 1075 00:54:52,456 --> 00:54:56,710 that people--their experience in Hell will be proportionate 1076 00:54:56,710 --> 00:54:58,462 to how they lived their life. 1077 00:54:58,462 --> 00:55:00,380 In other words, Adolf Hitler's experience 1078 00:55:00,380 --> 00:55:02,883 in Hell is not gonna be the same as my neighbor, 1079 00:55:02,883 --> 00:55:05,010 who may be an atheist, 1080 00:55:05,010 --> 00:55:06,970 who doesn't want anything to do with God, 1081 00:55:06,970 --> 00:55:08,639 has rejected God his whole life. 1082 00:55:08,639 --> 00:55:10,432 His experience in Hell and Adolf Hitler's 1083 00:55:10,432 --> 00:55:11,892 are gonna be quite different. 1084 00:55:11,892 --> 00:55:14,686 I think that matches the fairness of God. 1085 00:55:14,686 --> 00:55:16,688 You know, the Bible says, "Will not the judge 1086 00:55:16,688 --> 00:55:18,732 of all the Earth do what's right?" 1087 00:55:18,732 --> 00:55:22,277 And nobody after being judged by God 1088 00:55:22,277 --> 00:55:24,780 will be able to legitimately shake their fist at God 1089 00:55:24,780 --> 00:55:26,865 and say that was unfair. 1090 00:55:26,865 --> 00:55:30,869 We will ultimately see the fairness of God. 1091 00:55:30,869 --> 00:55:34,623 ♪ ♪ 1092 00:55:34,623 --> 00:55:37,584 Another misconception involves the figurative language 1093 00:55:37,584 --> 00:55:39,795 that the Bible uses to describe Hell. 1094 00:55:39,795 --> 00:55:44,258 For instance, it uses metaphors like flames and like darkness. 1095 00:55:44,258 --> 00:55:46,009 But those are clearly metaphors. 1096 00:55:46,009 --> 00:55:47,427 They're not literally true 1097 00:55:47,427 --> 00:55:49,263 because if they were literally true, 1098 00:55:49,263 --> 00:55:51,515 the flames would light up the darkness, 1099 00:55:51,515 --> 00:55:53,308 so that doesn't make sense. 1100 00:55:53,308 --> 00:55:55,769 And so I don't think that Hell is a place 1101 00:55:55,769 --> 00:55:59,940 of excessive thermal output, in other words. 1102 00:55:59,940 --> 00:56:04,361 And yet, metaphors are intended to point us to a broader truth 1103 00:56:04,361 --> 00:56:06,655 that we may not be able to fully comprehend yet, 1104 00:56:06,655 --> 00:56:08,532 and that broader truth is, 1105 00:56:08,532 --> 00:56:11,952 Hell is the very worst situation 1106 00:56:11,952 --> 00:56:15,122 that anybody could ever find themselves in. 1107 00:56:19,251 --> 00:56:24,548 - June 1, 1985, at Hotel De Lima, 1108 00:56:24,548 --> 00:56:27,759 Rue Saint-Germain, Paris, France, 1109 00:56:27,759 --> 00:56:30,345 my first thought was that I'd been shot. 1110 00:56:30,345 --> 00:56:33,640 Because it was like, right there, bang, 1111 00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:36,226 the most acute pain I'd ever experienced in my life. 1112 00:56:36,226 --> 00:56:37,686 Went to the hospital. 1113 00:56:37,686 --> 00:56:39,730 We went to emergency. 1114 00:56:39,730 --> 00:56:41,648 Two doctors examined me, 1115 00:56:41,648 --> 00:56:44,484 said the same thing that the doctor at the hotel said: 1116 00:56:44,484 --> 00:56:46,320 I had a perforation of duodenum, 1117 00:56:46,320 --> 00:56:47,988 and that if I didn't have surgery right away, 1118 00:56:47,988 --> 00:56:49,406 I would die. 1119 00:56:49,406 --> 00:56:52,451 But I didn't want to die because I knew 1120 00:56:52,451 --> 00:56:55,495 with 100% certainty that when you die, 1121 00:56:55,495 --> 00:56:57,247 that's it, it's over. 1122 00:56:58,332 --> 00:57:00,125 The screen goes black, 1123 00:57:00,125 --> 00:57:02,169 like in the movie theater, you know? 1124 00:57:02,169 --> 00:57:05,464 Says "the end," blackness, nothing. 1125 00:57:05,464 --> 00:57:07,633 I was 38 years old. I had a wife. 1126 00:57:07,633 --> 00:57:09,343 I had two kids. I had a good job. 1127 00:57:09,343 --> 00:57:10,677 I had a career. 1128 00:57:10,677 --> 00:57:12,179 I had art galleries showing my work. 1129 00:57:12,179 --> 00:57:13,388 I was winning prizes. 1130 00:57:13,388 --> 00:57:15,223 You know, I was making money. 1131 00:57:15,223 --> 00:57:16,725 This is not right. 1132 00:57:16,725 --> 00:57:19,394 This is not time for me to die. 1133 00:57:19,394 --> 00:57:22,898 I woke from unconsciousness, 1134 00:57:22,898 --> 00:57:24,691 and I was standing next to the bed, 1135 00:57:24,691 --> 00:57:26,151 and I felt wonderful, 1136 00:57:26,151 --> 00:57:27,986 better than I ever felt my whole life. 1137 00:57:27,986 --> 00:57:32,866 And I noticed that the big, dead lump 1138 00:57:32,866 --> 00:57:36,411 in the bed was me. 1139 00:57:36,411 --> 00:57:40,666 ♪ ♪ 1140 00:57:40,666 --> 00:57:43,377 But I couldn't accept that, because it's not--I mean, 1141 00:57:43,377 --> 00:57:45,545 that's impossible. 1142 00:57:45,545 --> 00:57:47,798 Then I heard people outside the room 1143 00:57:47,798 --> 00:57:49,466 calling me by name in English, 1144 00:57:49,466 --> 00:57:51,968 which I thought was weird because everybody 1145 00:57:51,968 --> 00:57:54,012 in the French hospital spoke French. 1146 00:57:54,012 --> 00:57:55,722 And they said, "Hurry up. 1147 00:57:55,722 --> 00:57:59,476 "We've been waiting for you. We know everything. 1148 00:57:59,476 --> 00:58:00,977 "We've been waiting and waiting, 1149 00:58:00,977 --> 00:58:02,771 and it's time for you to come with us." 1150 00:58:02,771 --> 00:58:06,108 So I assumed, since I had mentioned the doctor, 1151 00:58:06,108 --> 00:58:07,734 that they were gonna take me to the doctor. 1152 00:58:07,734 --> 00:58:10,487 So I left the light of the room and went out 1153 00:58:10,487 --> 00:58:14,825 into the very gray, dank hallway, 1154 00:58:14,825 --> 00:58:16,827 where there was this group of people 1155 00:58:16,827 --> 00:58:19,329 that stayed back in the darkness 1156 00:58:19,329 --> 00:58:21,540 away from the light of the room. 1157 00:58:21,540 --> 00:58:25,085 And they led me what at first I thought was the hallway, 1158 00:58:25,085 --> 00:58:27,713 but then we walked for miles, and miles, and miles, 1159 00:58:27,713 --> 00:58:31,550 and we never went up or down. 1160 00:58:31,550 --> 00:58:35,554 We just--they encircled me and just shepherd me 1161 00:58:35,554 --> 00:58:39,558 into ever-increasing darkness. 1162 00:58:39,558 --> 00:58:43,019 It started off with them being very officious. 1163 00:58:43,019 --> 00:58:46,982 Like, "This way, keep moving, hurry up." 1164 00:58:46,982 --> 00:58:52,195 That evolved into, "What's the matter with you? 1165 00:58:52,195 --> 00:58:55,323 Move, move faster. You're too slow." 1166 00:58:55,323 --> 00:59:00,162 That became vulgar. 1167 00:59:00,162 --> 00:59:03,749 And then it became clear that they were gonna have at me. 1168 00:59:03,749 --> 00:59:09,379 They began by kicking, punching, pulling. 1169 00:59:09,379 --> 00:59:14,217 Then they started biting, and ripping, and tearing. 1170 00:59:14,217 --> 00:59:18,138 And then they started 1171 00:59:18,138 --> 00:59:21,266 invading me physically. 1172 00:59:21,266 --> 00:59:25,103 So eventually, I was completely torn apart, 1173 00:59:25,103 --> 00:59:27,564 lying on the ground, unable to even move 1174 00:59:27,564 --> 00:59:30,901 or defend myself in any way. 1175 00:59:30,901 --> 00:59:35,071 I'm completely defeated, 1176 00:59:35,071 --> 00:59:36,615 completely depressed and despair. 1177 00:59:36,615 --> 00:59:38,158 And I couldn't think of any way out. 1178 00:59:38,158 --> 00:59:40,869 This is it forever, and ever, and ever 1179 00:59:40,869 --> 00:59:43,580 with these horrible people. 1180 00:59:43,580 --> 00:59:46,958 And I heard a voice say, "Pray to God." 1181 00:59:46,958 --> 00:59:49,461 And I thought, "I don't believe in God. 1182 00:59:49,461 --> 00:59:51,004 I don't pray." 1183 00:59:51,004 --> 00:59:53,465 And the voice said, "Pray to God," kind of strong. 1184 00:59:53,465 --> 00:59:56,635 And I thought, "I don't know how to pray. 1185 00:59:56,635 --> 00:59:58,011 I can't pray." 1186 00:59:58,011 --> 01:00:01,348 And the voice said, "Pray to God." 1187 01:00:01,348 --> 01:00:03,642 ♪ ♪ 1188 01:00:03,642 --> 01:00:09,397 My mind went involuntarily to me as a little boy 1189 01:00:09,397 --> 01:00:13,485 in a Sunday classroom singing "Jesus Loves Me." 1190 01:00:13,485 --> 01:00:16,905 I could see it vividly. I could hear it vividly. 1191 01:00:16,905 --> 01:00:19,825 But much more importantly, I could feel it vividly, 1192 01:00:19,825 --> 01:00:22,577 that as a little boy, when I sang "Jesus Loved Me," 1193 01:00:22,577 --> 01:00:26,039 I believed that there was this really cool guy named Jesus, 1194 01:00:26,039 --> 01:00:27,999 and the lions, and tigers, and bears would come out 1195 01:00:27,999 --> 01:00:30,961 of the closet, you know, and start swarming 1196 01:00:30,961 --> 01:00:33,129 around my bedroom in the middle of the night. 1197 01:00:33,129 --> 01:00:34,506 You know, I would pray to Jesus, 1198 01:00:34,506 --> 01:00:36,675 and they would all flee. 1199 01:00:36,675 --> 01:00:41,221 ♪ ♪ 1200 01:00:41,221 --> 01:00:44,474 And I believed in him as a little boy. 1201 01:00:44,474 --> 01:00:46,434 That's why when I was 12, I wanted to get baptized 1202 01:00:46,434 --> 01:00:48,979 'cause I wanted to know him. 1203 01:00:48,979 --> 01:00:54,526 And when 1204 01:00:54,526 --> 01:00:57,404 that happened, 1205 01:00:57,404 --> 01:01:00,323 I decided that I needed to take a chance 1206 01:01:00,323 --> 01:01:04,202 'cause I didn't know what I did not. 1207 01:01:04,202 --> 01:01:05,954 What I didn't know is whether he would care 1208 01:01:05,954 --> 01:01:07,414 about me or not. 1209 01:01:07,414 --> 01:01:10,208 As far as I was concerned, his best option would be 1210 01:01:10,208 --> 01:01:12,419 to leave me there. 1211 01:01:12,419 --> 01:01:18,258 And I called out to him, "Jesus, please save me." 1212 01:01:18,258 --> 01:01:20,302 and with that, a tiny light appeared in the darkness 1213 01:01:20,302 --> 01:01:23,179 and got very bright, and it came upon me. 1214 01:01:23,179 --> 01:01:24,931 It was impossibly brilliant. 1215 01:01:24,931 --> 01:01:27,726 If it had been light as we experience light 1216 01:01:27,726 --> 01:01:30,145 in this world, it would have consumed me. 1217 01:01:30,145 --> 01:01:31,980 I mean, I just would have been burnt up. 1218 01:01:31,980 --> 01:01:34,524 But it was that bright. 1219 01:01:34,524 --> 01:01:37,444 Out of it emerged hands and arms, 1220 01:01:37,444 --> 01:01:40,280 and he reached down and touched me, 1221 01:01:40,280 --> 01:01:43,491 and I saw myself come back together 1222 01:01:43,491 --> 01:01:45,911 from the roadkill that I was. 1223 01:01:45,911 --> 01:01:48,705 You know, I became complete. 1224 01:01:48,705 --> 01:01:51,291 And much more important to me was 1225 01:01:51,291 --> 01:01:53,084 that he filled me with the love 1226 01:01:53,084 --> 01:01:57,839 that I never experienced in this world. 1227 01:01:57,839 --> 01:02:02,135 And his hands and arms picked me up 1228 01:02:02,135 --> 01:02:04,638 without any effort, 1229 01:02:04,638 --> 01:02:07,057 and he brought me up against himself, 1230 01:02:07,057 --> 01:02:08,808 and put his arms around me, 1231 01:02:08,808 --> 01:02:12,228 to stroke my back like a mother or father would 1232 01:02:12,228 --> 01:02:14,105 with their child. 1233 01:02:14,105 --> 01:02:17,359 And I cried out of joy into his chest, 1234 01:02:17,359 --> 01:02:21,321 slobbering all over him. 1235 01:02:21,321 --> 01:02:26,576 The people who took me into that place of darkness 1236 01:02:26,576 --> 01:02:29,287 were people just like me. 1237 01:02:29,287 --> 01:02:31,665 They were people who had rejected God, 1238 01:02:31,665 --> 01:02:33,625 rejected God's love, 1239 01:02:33,625 --> 01:02:36,628 and God gave them exactly what they wanted. 1240 01:02:36,628 --> 01:02:39,506 I don't believe God punishes anybody. 1241 01:02:39,506 --> 01:02:43,677 I believe God gives everybody exactly what they want. 1242 01:02:43,677 --> 01:02:47,764 The Bible says humans judge by appearances, 1243 01:02:47,764 --> 01:02:50,183 God judges by the heart, 1244 01:02:50,183 --> 01:02:53,812 and if we seek God and seek God's love, 1245 01:02:53,812 --> 01:02:57,899 we will find it in this world and in the next. 1246 01:02:57,899 --> 01:03:02,237 And if we reject God and reject God's love, 1247 01:03:02,237 --> 01:03:04,781 we get to go to a world where those things don't happen. 1248 01:03:04,781 --> 01:03:06,866 And I don't mean this as a joke. 1249 01:03:06,866 --> 01:03:08,743 I mean this absolutely sincerely. 1250 01:03:08,743 --> 01:03:11,287 Hell's not so bad. 1251 01:03:11,287 --> 01:03:13,289 The problem is the people that are there. 1252 01:03:13,289 --> 01:03:16,626 They're awful. They're really awful. 1253 01:03:16,626 --> 01:03:19,963 There's nothing to do there except torment one another, 1254 01:03:19,963 --> 01:03:22,590 so Hell is a place of continuous torment. 1255 01:03:22,590 --> 01:03:26,428 It's a place of complete hopelessness and despair. 1256 01:03:29,347 --> 01:03:32,225 - What do you make out of Howard Storm? 1257 01:03:32,225 --> 01:03:35,729 Like, I know he's in the book, but how did you discover him? 1258 01:03:35,729 --> 01:03:37,313 - Yeah. - And why him? 1259 01:03:37,313 --> 01:03:38,648 - Well, you know, there was a series of studies 1260 01:03:38,648 --> 01:03:40,358 that we've done that showed that, 1261 01:03:40,358 --> 01:03:43,153 of 1,400 people who had had near-death experiences, 1262 01:03:43,153 --> 01:03:45,572 23% had negative experiences 1263 01:03:45,572 --> 01:03:50,910 that ranged from distressing to frightening and terrorizing. 1264 01:03:50,910 --> 01:03:53,038 And his was an example of someone 1265 01:03:53,038 --> 01:03:55,331 who had a terrorizing experience. 1266 01:03:55,331 --> 01:03:57,083 - How do you go about, like, for that one, 1267 01:03:57,083 --> 01:03:59,044 verifying, like, its validity? 1268 01:03:59,044 --> 01:04:00,754 Yeah, that's a good question. 1269 01:04:00,754 --> 01:04:02,255 - 'Cause it's like, you hear a lot about "I went to Heaven." 1270 01:04:02,255 --> 01:04:03,339 Yeah. 1271 01:04:03,339 --> 01:04:04,758 - But very few "I went to Hell." 1272 01:04:04,758 --> 01:04:07,052 - Yeah, I think it's against a person's interest 1273 01:04:07,052 --> 01:04:09,304 to talk about having gone to Hell 1274 01:04:09,304 --> 01:04:11,222 because it's embarrassing. 1275 01:04:11,222 --> 01:04:13,933 Who wants to say, "Oh, yeah, I was in the trash bin 1276 01:04:13,933 --> 01:04:16,186 of the afterlife," you know. 1277 01:04:16,186 --> 01:04:17,937 So it's embarrassing. 1278 01:04:17,937 --> 01:04:20,648 It's traumatic to the degree that I think some 1279 01:04:20,648 --> 01:04:22,734 of them have post-traumatic stress syndrome, 1280 01:04:22,734 --> 01:04:24,569 and they don't want to talk about it, 1281 01:04:24,569 --> 01:04:26,321 they don't want to revisit it and so forth. 1282 01:04:26,321 --> 01:04:28,239 And in the case of Howard Storm, 1283 01:04:28,239 --> 01:04:31,743 here's someone who came back from that experience, 1284 01:04:31,743 --> 01:04:35,121 and it was so profound, it was so real to him, 1285 01:04:35,121 --> 01:04:38,500 that he resigned his position, his tenured professorship, 1286 01:04:38,500 --> 01:04:40,418 his chairmanship of the art department 1287 01:04:40,418 --> 01:04:41,753 at this university, 1288 01:04:41,753 --> 01:04:44,756 and became a pastor of a tiny church 1289 01:04:44,756 --> 01:04:47,425 that he continues to serve to this day. 1290 01:04:47,425 --> 01:04:49,594 That's some evidence that this was more 1291 01:04:49,594 --> 01:04:51,513 than just some loose hallucination. 1292 01:04:51,513 --> 01:04:54,641 There was something profound that happened to him, 1293 01:04:54,641 --> 01:04:58,394 something that chilled him to the bone. 1294 01:04:58,394 --> 01:05:00,563 - Would you say that there's more sermons about Hell 1295 01:05:00,563 --> 01:05:02,649 than there are Heaven or vice versa? 1296 01:05:02,649 --> 01:05:05,485 - I think there's a lot more sermons about Heaven 1297 01:05:05,485 --> 01:05:07,237 than there are Hell. 1298 01:05:07,237 --> 01:05:10,865 Very few pastors like to talk about Hell. 1299 01:05:10,865 --> 01:05:13,827 [upbeat music] 1300 01:05:13,827 --> 01:05:16,663 ♪ ♪ 1301 01:05:16,663 --> 01:05:21,042 - So we are in Chinatown, San Francisco, 1302 01:05:21,042 --> 01:05:23,670 and this is where I was born. 1303 01:05:23,670 --> 01:05:27,799 This is the hospital, back in 1967. 1304 01:05:27,799 --> 01:05:30,051 This is also where Bruce Lee was born, 1305 01:05:30,051 --> 01:05:32,887 which is kind of cool. 1306 01:05:32,887 --> 01:05:37,392 And this is where my mother died 54 years ago. 1307 01:05:37,392 --> 01:05:41,479 ♪ ♪ 1308 01:05:41,479 --> 01:05:45,525 Yeah, my dad kind of flipped out, 1309 01:05:45,525 --> 01:05:49,946 and I feel like that's why he always resented me, 1310 01:05:49,946 --> 01:05:52,991 and I think it's because I was the one that caused her death. 1311 01:05:52,991 --> 01:05:55,618 ♪ ♪ 1312 01:05:55,618 --> 01:05:57,704 We never even talked about it. 1313 01:05:57,704 --> 01:06:00,957 Like, he just--the only time he ever talked to me was 1314 01:06:00,957 --> 01:06:04,252 when he was beating me, you know, just yelling at me, 1315 01:06:04,252 --> 01:06:06,296 maybe giving me instructions, telling me what to do. 1316 01:06:06,296 --> 01:06:09,299 But we didn't have conversations, 1317 01:06:09,299 --> 01:06:11,050 which isn't really that abnormal 1318 01:06:11,050 --> 01:06:12,969 in a Chinese family. 1319 01:06:12,969 --> 01:06:19,350 I don't know the whole story, but my mother--when she died, 1320 01:06:19,350 --> 01:06:21,978 you know, people blamed the hospital or whatever, 1321 01:06:21,978 --> 01:06:23,521 but she basically bled out. 1322 01:06:23,521 --> 01:06:25,899 It was something that was pretty--should be 1323 01:06:25,899 --> 01:06:28,902 pretty simple nowadays. 1324 01:06:28,902 --> 01:06:30,445 Because she died, 1325 01:06:30,445 --> 01:06:32,739 and I think my dad just had a hard time, 1326 01:06:32,739 --> 01:06:36,784 like, you know, living in the U.S., making a living, 1327 01:06:36,784 --> 01:06:39,454 he had me sent to Hong Kong 1328 01:06:39,454 --> 01:06:42,081 to grow up with my grandmothers. 1329 01:06:42,081 --> 01:06:46,294 ♪ ♪ 1330 01:06:46,294 --> 01:06:50,131 My name in Chinese is Chan Yang Fan, 1331 01:06:50,131 --> 01:06:54,636 and that last character is the same character 1332 01:06:54,636 --> 01:06:56,471 in San Francisco. 1333 01:06:56,471 --> 01:07:01,434 I'm assuming my dad just took the translation into English 1334 01:07:01,434 --> 01:07:03,228 and named me Francis. 1335 01:07:03,228 --> 01:07:07,440 So I guess, in a sense, I'm named after the city. 1336 01:07:07,440 --> 01:07:10,485 And it's weird 'cause my stepmom... 1337 01:07:10,485 --> 01:07:12,654 it says "Chin" here, 1338 01:07:12,654 --> 01:07:15,281 and that's what it says on my birth certificate. 1339 01:07:15,281 --> 01:07:18,368 But then my stepmom is Chan, and my dad is Chan. 1340 01:07:18,368 --> 01:07:20,119 And so I don't know. 1341 01:07:20,119 --> 01:07:22,455 You know, back then, everything was just a little more screwy, 1342 01:07:22,455 --> 01:07:25,959 so who knows who I am? 1343 01:07:25,959 --> 01:07:28,253 [soft music] 1344 01:07:34,550 --> 01:07:39,222 Death is so ugly. 1345 01:07:41,266 --> 01:07:45,645 And it's awful in so many ways. 1346 01:07:45,645 --> 01:07:47,814 Like, you know, having seven kids, 1347 01:07:47,814 --> 01:07:49,565 there's that fear. 1348 01:07:49,565 --> 01:07:51,943 Having grandkids, I have that fear. 1349 01:07:51,943 --> 01:07:53,695 Being married to a woman that I love, 1350 01:07:53,695 --> 01:07:55,446 there's fear. 1351 01:07:55,446 --> 01:07:58,533 Like, I don't like the thought 1352 01:07:58,533 --> 01:08:01,286 that that could end at any moment. 1353 01:08:01,286 --> 01:08:07,083 At the same time... 1354 01:08:07,083 --> 01:08:09,961 the whole point of the resurrection 1355 01:08:09,961 --> 01:08:13,131 is that I wouldn't have to fear it in a sense of, 1356 01:08:13,131 --> 01:08:15,216 "Oh, no, what's gonna happen next?" 1357 01:08:15,216 --> 01:08:18,428 In a lot of ways, it's like, that's what I anticipate. 1358 01:08:18,428 --> 01:08:21,180 Like, God, bring it. I'm ready to go. 1359 01:08:21,180 --> 01:08:24,350 I'm done with this Earth. 1360 01:08:24,350 --> 01:08:26,227 You know, I'll do whatever you want me to do. 1361 01:08:26,227 --> 01:08:28,271 I'll stay here as long as you want me to stay here. 1362 01:08:28,271 --> 01:08:30,523 But there's so much of me that's like, 1363 01:08:30,523 --> 01:08:32,692 oh, I can't wait to die. 1364 01:08:32,692 --> 01:08:34,944 I can't wait to get out of here. 1365 01:08:41,492 --> 01:08:43,119 Like, it's weird. 1366 01:08:43,119 --> 01:08:45,580 Like, I would love to know what it would feel like 1367 01:08:45,580 --> 01:08:49,417 to have a mom that gave birth to me 1368 01:08:49,417 --> 01:08:52,420 and loved me, and--but I'll never have that. 1369 01:08:52,420 --> 01:08:54,756 I'd love to have a dad right now, 1370 01:08:54,756 --> 01:08:57,508 and just wonder, what did he think of my life? 1371 01:08:57,508 --> 01:08:59,427 I know we didn't talk, you know, 1372 01:08:59,427 --> 01:09:01,804 the whole time you were alive, but would it have changed-- 1373 01:09:01,804 --> 01:09:06,434 you know, of course, there's some of that curiosity. 1374 01:09:06,434 --> 01:09:09,103 Sometimes, I'll think about her on Mother's Day, 1375 01:09:09,103 --> 01:09:13,608 like, just grateful that she decided to have me 1376 01:09:13,608 --> 01:09:18,071 and lost her life so that I could be on this Earth. 1377 01:09:18,071 --> 01:09:20,365 I have no idea what would have happened 1378 01:09:20,365 --> 01:09:22,575 if my parents stayed alive. 1379 01:09:22,575 --> 01:09:25,912 ♪ ♪ 1380 01:09:25,912 --> 01:09:27,830 I don't know. 1381 01:09:27,830 --> 01:09:29,874 Before I left for China, 1382 01:09:29,874 --> 01:09:32,835 I found these old pictures of her, 1383 01:09:32,835 --> 01:09:38,424 and it showed the location of where she did ministry, 1384 01:09:38,424 --> 01:09:42,428 And it happened to be exactly where they had 1385 01:09:42,428 --> 01:09:44,722 set up an office for me. 1386 01:09:44,722 --> 01:09:47,600 And so I thought, that is crazy 1387 01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:52,772 that 60 years ago, 1388 01:09:52,772 --> 01:09:56,442 my mom was doing ministry in that exact same spot 1389 01:09:56,442 --> 01:09:59,070 where God was calling me now. 1390 01:09:59,070 --> 01:10:05,993 ♪ ♪ 1391 01:10:09,705 --> 01:10:12,667 [upbeat folk music] 1392 01:10:12,667 --> 01:10:19,590 ♪ ♪ 1393 01:10:19,590 --> 01:10:21,634 - What do you think your life would have been like 1394 01:10:21,634 --> 01:10:23,344 if you had not come to Christ, 1395 01:10:23,344 --> 01:10:26,055 if you had not taken on that challenge to investigate, 1396 01:10:26,055 --> 01:10:28,015 you know, the resurrection of Jesus? 1397 01:10:28,015 --> 01:10:32,395 - I've thought about that, and I don't know for sure, 1398 01:10:32,395 --> 01:10:34,105 but I was headed down a dark path. 1399 01:10:34,105 --> 01:10:39,026 ♪ ♪ 1400 01:10:39,026 --> 01:10:41,320 We were childhood sweethearts. 1401 01:10:41,320 --> 01:10:43,364 I mean, we dated on and off in high school, 1402 01:10:43,364 --> 01:10:45,158 and we enjoyed each other, 1403 01:10:45,158 --> 01:10:47,326 and we had a certain expectation 1404 01:10:47,326 --> 01:10:49,454 of what our future would be like. 1405 01:10:49,454 --> 01:10:52,165 And then, one day, she came up to me 1406 01:10:52,165 --> 01:10:54,542 and gave me the worst news that an atheist could get. 1407 01:10:54,542 --> 01:10:55,960 She said, "I've decided 1408 01:10:55,960 --> 01:10:58,254 to become a follower of Jesus." 1409 01:10:58,254 --> 01:11:02,383 And first word that went through my mind was divorce. 1410 01:11:02,383 --> 01:11:04,844 I was gonna walk out. 1411 01:11:04,844 --> 01:11:07,555 ♪ ♪ 1412 01:11:07,555 --> 01:11:10,808 You know, I was a narcissist. 1413 01:11:10,808 --> 01:11:13,102 I was a drunk. 1414 01:11:13,102 --> 01:11:16,230 I was self-absorbed. 1415 01:11:16,230 --> 01:11:18,733 I was a liar. I was a cheater. 1416 01:11:20,526 --> 01:11:22,069 People thought I was a great guy. 1417 01:11:22,069 --> 01:11:23,905 They didn't know the inside of me. 1418 01:11:23,905 --> 01:11:26,866 They didn't know--they didn't see me 1419 01:11:26,866 --> 01:11:28,743 when I was literally drunk in the snow 1420 01:11:28,743 --> 01:11:30,578 in an alley on Saturday night. 1421 01:11:30,578 --> 01:11:32,830 You know, I had all this success in journalism, 1422 01:11:32,830 --> 01:11:35,500 but it masked what was really going on in me. 1423 01:11:35,500 --> 01:11:42,423 ♪ ♪ 1424 01:12:06,822 --> 01:12:13,412 - ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh ♪ 1425 01:12:13,412 --> 01:12:16,749 ♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪ 1426 01:12:16,749 --> 01:12:18,709 - When you look around this world, man, 1427 01:12:18,709 --> 01:12:21,170 and there are choices that we make, you know, 1428 01:12:21,170 --> 01:12:24,090 and those choices lead to... 1429 01:12:24,090 --> 01:12:26,259 well, instead of saying good or bad, 1430 01:12:26,259 --> 01:12:28,761 I'd like to say life or death, right? 1431 01:12:28,761 --> 01:12:31,305 The choices that we make will usually lead 1432 01:12:31,305 --> 01:12:33,474 to one or the other, seldom just right 1433 01:12:33,474 --> 01:12:34,892 in the middle of the road, right? 1434 01:12:34,892 --> 01:12:36,519 Things bring us life, or they bring us death. 1435 01:12:36,519 --> 01:12:38,229 We make those choices all the time. 1436 01:12:38,229 --> 01:12:42,275 [soft music] 1437 01:12:42,275 --> 01:12:45,528 I think the essence of what we long for 1438 01:12:45,528 --> 01:12:48,239 is to know that we're loved. 1439 01:12:48,239 --> 01:12:50,700 While we're here on this Earth, 1440 01:12:50,700 --> 01:12:52,785 I think it's safe to say that we all 1441 01:12:52,785 --> 01:12:56,497 have some significant doubts about the fact 1442 01:12:56,497 --> 01:12:58,207 that we're truly loved. 1443 01:12:58,207 --> 01:13:02,795 But it's God's purpose to reveal that to us here. 1444 01:13:02,795 --> 01:13:06,048 And it's our purpose to open our hearts to it 1445 01:13:06,048 --> 01:13:10,303 and in turn reveal that truth to each other. 1446 01:13:10,303 --> 01:13:16,350 ♪ ♪ 1447 01:13:16,350 --> 01:13:19,353 [soft piano music] 1448 01:13:19,353 --> 01:13:26,277 ♪ ♪ 1449 01:13:33,034 --> 01:13:38,748 ♪ I was there when you looked up into the night ♪ 1450 01:13:38,748 --> 01:13:40,499 ♪ ♪ 1451 01:13:40,499 --> 01:13:44,962 ♪ Looking far beyond the stars and asking why ♪ 1452 01:13:44,962 --> 01:13:47,131 ♪ ♪ 1453 01:13:47,131 --> 01:13:51,177 ♪ Although you thought you were alone ♪ 1454 01:13:51,177 --> 01:13:56,849 ♪ When you fell into the unknown ♪ 1455 01:13:56,849 --> 01:13:59,268 ♪ All the while, my love ♪ 1456 01:13:59,268 --> 01:14:04,398 ♪ You were a child of mine ♪ 1457 01:14:04,398 --> 01:14:10,363 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪ 1458 01:14:10,363 --> 01:14:17,286 ♪ ♪ 1459 01:14:19,080 --> 01:14:25,002 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪ 1460 01:14:25,002 --> 01:14:31,926 ♪ ♪ 1461 01:14:33,052 --> 01:14:38,516 ♪ Yeah ♪ 1462 01:14:38,516 --> 01:14:41,560 - How much does pain, suffering, betrayal, 1463 01:14:41,560 --> 01:14:46,691 hurt, questions play into writing your music? 1464 01:14:46,691 --> 01:14:50,236 - Pain and longing accompany each other in the way that, 1465 01:14:50,236 --> 01:14:52,488 when we experience that longing, 1466 01:14:52,488 --> 01:14:54,073 there is a sense of, 1467 01:14:54,073 --> 01:14:57,076 "Hey, things aren't right here in this Earth" 1468 01:14:57,076 --> 01:15:00,955 in the way that we know, somewhere deep down, 1469 01:15:00,955 --> 01:15:03,416 it's supposed to be right. 1470 01:15:03,416 --> 01:15:05,459 When there's injustice, 1471 01:15:05,459 --> 01:15:07,628 we know that somewhere there's supposed 1472 01:15:07,628 --> 01:15:11,799 to be a place that is just. 1473 01:15:11,799 --> 01:15:13,884 So the question is, where does that come from? 1474 01:15:13,884 --> 01:15:16,387 If it doesn't exist somewhere, 1475 01:15:16,387 --> 01:15:18,889 why would we long for something like that? 1476 01:15:18,889 --> 01:15:25,771 ♪ ♪ 1477 01:15:28,482 --> 01:15:34,155 - Eric, tell us how some of these sounds and things 1478 01:15:34,155 --> 01:15:36,365 that we hear can just, like, I guess, 1479 01:15:36,365 --> 01:15:38,617 take us to another place. 1480 01:15:38,617 --> 01:15:42,496 - Yeah, I mean, every artist has their own way 1481 01:15:42,496 --> 01:15:46,375 of kind of capturing that other place. 1482 01:15:46,375 --> 01:15:50,755 For me, I have really experimented 1483 01:15:50,755 --> 01:15:54,550 with trying to find a sound that is unfamiliar 1484 01:15:54,550 --> 01:15:56,594 but, at the same time, familiar. 1485 01:15:56,594 --> 01:16:00,264 And so I pulled this up for you, Mani, 1486 01:16:00,264 --> 01:16:01,932 'cause I want to do a little experiment 1487 01:16:01,932 --> 01:16:04,894 with you--experiment for you. 1488 01:16:04,894 --> 01:16:06,729 And listen to this track, 1489 01:16:06,729 --> 01:16:08,981 and I'm gonna play two different tracks, 1490 01:16:08,981 --> 01:16:11,108 and see if you know what this is. 1491 01:16:11,108 --> 01:16:14,111 [soft music] 1492 01:16:14,111 --> 01:16:20,201 ♪ ♪ 1493 01:16:20,201 --> 01:16:23,370 Okay, so do you recognize that instrument? 1494 01:16:23,370 --> 01:16:26,040 - Yeah, I think that's the oboe. 1495 01:16:26,040 --> 01:16:28,959 - So an oboe--you know, if nobody's ever heard 1496 01:16:28,959 --> 01:16:31,295 an oboe before, they might go, "Wow, that's, like, incredible. 1497 01:16:31,295 --> 01:16:32,963 That's taking me to another world." 1498 01:16:32,963 --> 01:16:36,509 But for most of us, we know what sound that is. 1499 01:16:36,509 --> 01:16:39,053 And obviously, we can make a melody with that oboe 1500 01:16:39,053 --> 01:16:41,806 that can take us to another place. 1501 01:16:41,806 --> 01:16:43,974 So close your eyes for a minute 1502 01:16:43,974 --> 01:16:46,185 and listen to this sound. 1503 01:16:47,436 --> 01:16:50,397 [soft note building] 1504 01:16:50,397 --> 01:16:57,321 ♪ ♪ 1505 01:17:05,579 --> 01:17:07,206 Okay, what do you hear there? 1506 01:17:08,791 --> 01:17:11,544 - Yeah, I have no idea what that is. 1507 01:17:11,544 --> 01:17:14,839 - So part of what you're hearing is, 1508 01:17:14,839 --> 01:17:16,507 in the beginning, 1509 01:17:16,507 --> 01:17:19,844 it's actually samples of outer space. 1510 01:17:19,844 --> 01:17:24,557 So there's sounds coming from quasars, 1511 01:17:24,557 --> 01:17:26,392 and the Solar System, 1512 01:17:26,392 --> 01:17:28,602 and planets, and things like that 1513 01:17:28,602 --> 01:17:31,564 that, through equipment, can actually be translated 1514 01:17:31,564 --> 01:17:32,982 into sound. 1515 01:17:32,982 --> 01:17:34,316 So I have a few of these samples. 1516 01:17:34,316 --> 01:17:36,110 And when you hear these samples, you're like, 1517 01:17:36,110 --> 01:17:38,195 "Wow, that's an unfamiliar sound." 1518 01:17:38,195 --> 01:17:40,531 It's not, like, every day that we walk around, 1519 01:17:40,531 --> 01:17:42,616 we're hearing sounds of outer space, 1520 01:17:42,616 --> 01:17:44,159 and planets, and stuff. 1521 01:17:44,159 --> 01:17:45,995 So when you take a sound like that 1522 01:17:45,995 --> 01:17:49,874 and then incorporate other familiar tones and textures, 1523 01:17:49,874 --> 01:17:52,168 and combine them all, you come out 1524 01:17:52,168 --> 01:17:56,547 with something that's, in some ways, 1525 01:17:56,547 --> 01:18:01,218 just really moving, taking you to another place. 1526 01:18:01,218 --> 01:18:03,971 - I think faith is--it's an interesting topic 1527 01:18:03,971 --> 01:18:06,056 because when I was an atheist, 1528 01:18:06,056 --> 01:18:08,183 I thought faith was believing something 1529 01:18:08,183 --> 01:18:09,476 even though you knew in your heart 1530 01:18:09,476 --> 01:18:10,853 it couldn't be true. 1531 01:18:10,853 --> 01:18:12,396 You know, I thought that's what faith was. 1532 01:18:12,396 --> 01:18:13,939 And then I came to learn 1533 01:18:13,939 --> 01:18:16,358 that Biblical faith is quite different, 1534 01:18:16,358 --> 01:18:17,610 and I think it's important for people 1535 01:18:17,610 --> 01:18:19,236 to understand that distinction. 1536 01:18:19,236 --> 01:18:22,865 Biblical faith is taking a step in the same direction 1537 01:18:22,865 --> 01:18:26,785 that the evidence is pointing, which is logical and rational. 1538 01:18:26,785 --> 01:18:28,954 [speaking Russian] 1539 01:18:28,954 --> 01:18:33,375 [soft music] 1540 01:18:33,375 --> 01:18:36,086 Yuri Gagarin was the cosmonaut--Russian cosmonaut. 1541 01:18:36,086 --> 01:18:37,796 He was the first guy into space. 1542 01:18:37,796 --> 01:18:41,550 And he quipped, when he was up there, he said--or later, 1543 01:18:41,550 --> 01:18:43,636 I can't remember, but he said basically, 1544 01:18:43,636 --> 01:18:46,764 "I looked around, and I didn't see God." 1545 01:18:46,764 --> 01:18:50,226 And yet Buzz Aldrin, who was one of the Americans 1546 01:18:50,226 --> 01:18:53,020 who went to the Moon, who celebrated communion 1547 01:18:53,020 --> 01:18:57,816 on Christmas Eve in space, affirmed that God is real. 1548 01:18:58,609 --> 01:19:03,489 - Sunday, July 20, 1969, around the world, 1549 01:19:03,489 --> 01:19:06,033 nearly a billion people watched this moment 1550 01:19:06,033 --> 01:19:09,828 on television as the first man from Earth prepared 1551 01:19:09,828 --> 01:19:11,705 to set foot upon the Moon. 1552 01:19:11,705 --> 01:19:14,541 - That's one small step for man. 1553 01:19:14,541 --> 01:19:17,044 [upbeat music] 1554 01:19:17,044 --> 01:19:22,174 One giant leap for mankind. 1555 01:19:22,174 --> 01:19:25,427 - I believe that this nation should commit itself 1556 01:19:25,427 --> 01:19:29,139 to achieving the goal, before this decade is out, 1557 01:19:29,139 --> 01:19:31,392 of landing a man on the Moon 1558 01:19:31,392 --> 01:19:34,645 and returning him safely to the Earth. 1559 01:19:34,645 --> 01:19:38,190 - And what that tells me is some people can see 1560 01:19:38,190 --> 01:19:40,651 the same evidence and come to different conclusions. 1561 01:19:40,651 --> 01:19:44,113 And you have to ask yourself, what's driving that? 1562 01:19:44,113 --> 01:19:45,823 What's driving that? 1563 01:19:45,823 --> 01:19:48,242 Do I have reasons not to believe? 1564 01:19:48,242 --> 01:19:51,036 Are there reasons I don't want to believe? 1565 01:19:51,036 --> 01:19:53,247 Are there things in my life I would have to give up 1566 01:19:53,247 --> 01:19:56,250 if I became a believer in God? 1567 01:19:56,250 --> 01:19:59,169 Are there certain moral things that I would have to give up 1568 01:19:59,169 --> 01:20:01,255 because they're immoral in God's sight, 1569 01:20:01,255 --> 01:20:03,007 and I want to keep doing them, 1570 01:20:03,007 --> 01:20:04,883 and so I would rather find reasons 1571 01:20:04,883 --> 01:20:07,469 not to believe than to believe? 1572 01:20:07,469 --> 01:20:09,930 So we have to try to filter out our motives 1573 01:20:09,930 --> 01:20:11,557 as much as we can, 1574 01:20:11,557 --> 01:20:16,687 and say, "I want to reach a verdict 1575 01:20:16,687 --> 01:20:19,565 "in the case for Heaven based on the evidence 1576 01:20:19,565 --> 01:20:21,650 "and not on my wishful thinking, 1577 01:20:21,650 --> 01:20:23,986 "or not on my preconceptions, 1578 01:20:23,986 --> 01:20:26,947 or not on my biases or prejudices." 1579 01:20:26,947 --> 01:20:29,700 I want to reach it based on, "What is the evidence? 1580 01:20:29,700 --> 01:20:32,077 "Is there sufficient evidence to tell me 1581 01:20:32,077 --> 01:20:34,747 that when I die I will continue to live on?" 1582 01:20:34,747 --> 01:20:39,501 ♪ ♪ 1583 01:20:43,380 --> 01:20:46,467 - Sometimes, this church is actually 1584 01:20:46,467 --> 01:20:49,386 what deters some folks from even finding that love. 1585 01:20:49,386 --> 01:20:50,763 because of their negative experience. 1586 01:20:50,763 --> 01:20:53,390 Right, right. 1587 01:20:53,390 --> 01:20:55,059 What do you say to those 1588 01:20:55,059 --> 01:20:57,269 that can't get this out of the way, 1589 01:20:57,269 --> 01:20:58,479 you know what I mean? 1590 01:20:58,479 --> 01:21:01,023 - That's a real problem, I think. 1591 01:21:01,023 --> 01:21:04,735 You know, for me, I want to strip away things 1592 01:21:04,735 --> 01:21:07,529 that get in the way of finding the truth. 1593 01:21:07,529 --> 01:21:10,657 And if someone is hurt by a church, 1594 01:21:10,657 --> 01:21:12,159 or they're hurt by a relationship 1595 01:21:12,159 --> 01:21:13,994 with a Christian who betrays them, 1596 01:21:13,994 --> 01:21:17,081 or who uses them, or whatever, 1597 01:21:17,081 --> 01:21:19,124 that's a horrible thing, 1598 01:21:19,124 --> 01:21:21,293 and I can understand emotionally 1599 01:21:21,293 --> 01:21:25,130 how that makes a person less likely to seek after God. 1600 01:21:25,130 --> 01:21:26,965 But then I step back and say, "Wait a minute. 1601 01:21:26,965 --> 01:21:29,510 "That doesn't change the truth of Christianity. 1602 01:21:29,510 --> 01:21:33,097 That doesn't change whether it aligns with reality." 1603 01:21:33,097 --> 01:21:34,807 That's the real question. 1604 01:21:34,807 --> 01:21:38,352 Truth is that which corresponds to reality. 1605 01:21:38,352 --> 01:21:41,355 [soft music] 1606 01:21:41,355 --> 01:21:48,278 ♪ ♪ 1607 01:22:10,551 --> 01:22:14,638 It was more than 40 years since I've been in this house. 1608 01:22:22,062 --> 01:22:24,690 Yeah, my whole writing career, my whole journalism career, 1609 01:22:24,690 --> 01:22:26,775 started here in the basement of my house. 1610 01:22:36,368 --> 01:22:38,996 Well, we were in the family room here, 1611 01:22:38,996 --> 01:22:41,665 and I had blatantly disobeyed my dad 1612 01:22:41,665 --> 01:22:44,293 by buying a motorcycle that he had forbidden me 1613 01:22:44,293 --> 01:22:46,336 from buying, and he found out, 1614 01:22:46,336 --> 01:22:48,505 and we had a huge blowout argument, 1615 01:22:48,505 --> 01:22:52,551 and he said words that I hope he didn't mean, 1616 01:22:52,551 --> 01:22:54,803 but told me that he didn't have enough love for me 1617 01:22:54,803 --> 01:22:56,763 to fill his little finger. 1618 01:22:56,763 --> 01:23:00,517 And I remember hearing that, and I had no response. 1619 01:23:00,517 --> 01:23:02,144 What do you say to that? 1620 01:23:02,144 --> 01:23:05,189 And so there was silence for a moment, 1621 01:23:05,189 --> 01:23:08,567 and then I just turned and walked out. 1622 01:23:08,567 --> 01:23:11,028 And that was it. 1623 01:23:11,028 --> 01:23:14,239 ♪ ♪ 1624 01:23:14,239 --> 01:23:16,950 I never intended to go home. 1625 01:23:16,950 --> 01:23:20,787 Although I remember when he died, 1626 01:23:20,787 --> 01:23:22,539 I was at the wake, 1627 01:23:22,539 --> 01:23:25,334 and a guy came up to me--two guys actually, 1628 01:23:25,334 --> 01:23:26,585 and said, "Are you Lee?" 1629 01:23:26,585 --> 01:23:28,128 And I said, "Yeah." 1630 01:23:28,128 --> 01:23:30,756 And they said, "Oh, man, can I shake your hand? 1631 01:23:30,756 --> 01:23:32,841 "Your dad never stopped talking about you. 1632 01:23:32,841 --> 01:23:34,635 "He was so proud of you. 1633 01:23:34,635 --> 01:23:36,720 "And when you'd have a byline on the front page 1634 01:23:36,720 --> 01:23:38,931 "of the 'Chicago Tribune,' he was so proud. 1635 01:23:38,931 --> 01:23:40,474 He'd show us the article." 1636 01:23:40,474 --> 01:23:44,811 And I was just shocked by that 1637 01:23:44,811 --> 01:23:47,481 because it was nothing he ever expressed to me. 1638 01:23:47,481 --> 01:23:52,110 ♪ ♪ 1639 01:23:52,110 --> 01:23:53,862 We never reconciled, really. 1640 01:23:53,862 --> 01:23:55,489 We never talked about that incident. 1641 01:23:55,489 --> 01:23:59,201 We never processed it. We never resolved it. 1642 01:23:59,201 --> 01:24:02,454 And I remember interviewing a scholar about Heaven, 1643 01:24:02,454 --> 01:24:04,456 and he said, you know, "When you get to Heaven--" 1644 01:24:04,456 --> 01:24:06,375 I said, "I believe my father is in Heaven." 1645 01:24:06,375 --> 01:24:10,379 And he said, "That first hour that you get to Heaven, 1646 01:24:10,379 --> 01:24:12,381 "you're both gonna be totally motivated 1647 01:24:12,381 --> 01:24:15,008 "to reconcile fully and completely, 1648 01:24:15,008 --> 01:24:18,178 "and you'll be able to spend eternity in Heaven in the kind 1649 01:24:18,178 --> 01:24:19,805 "of father-son relationship 1650 01:24:19,805 --> 01:24:22,307 that you never really had in this world." 1651 01:24:22,307 --> 01:24:29,231 ♪ ♪ 1652 01:24:32,234 --> 01:24:35,821 Just that feeling of being here in this environment, 1653 01:24:35,821 --> 01:24:39,866 where my entire journalism career had its scene 1654 01:24:39,866 --> 01:24:43,453 and began, I mean, the nostalgia 1655 01:24:43,453 --> 01:24:45,247 just kind of wells up inside you. 1656 01:24:45,247 --> 01:24:48,959 It's a great feeling to be home. 1657 01:24:48,959 --> 01:24:51,211 ♪ ♪ 1658 01:24:59,094 --> 01:25:03,265 Oh, man, I think I'd say, 1659 01:25:03,265 --> 01:25:06,351 "Keep seeking. The truth is out there." 1660 01:25:06,351 --> 01:25:13,275 ♪ ♪ 1661 01:25:35,047 --> 01:25:39,843 [soft piano music] 1662 01:25:39,843 --> 01:25:42,721 Jesus, unlike anybody else in history, 1663 01:25:42,721 --> 01:25:46,641 has the credentials to tell us the truth about the afterlife. 1664 01:25:46,641 --> 01:25:48,810 - When you explain the resurrection, 1665 01:25:48,810 --> 01:25:52,022 you tend to talk about these four things. 1666 01:25:52,022 --> 01:25:55,442 - Yeah, the four areas are, number one, his execution, 1667 01:25:55,442 --> 01:25:58,362 number two, the early reports that he rose from the dead, 1668 01:25:58,362 --> 01:26:00,280 number three, the empty tomb, 1669 01:26:00,280 --> 01:26:03,450 and number four, the eyewitnesses. 1670 01:26:03,450 --> 01:26:05,577 So the first E is for execution, 1671 01:26:05,577 --> 01:26:08,914 that Jesus was truly dead after being crucified. 1672 01:26:08,914 --> 01:26:11,416 And the evidence for this is very powerful. 1673 01:26:11,416 --> 01:26:15,170 We have no evidence anywhere of anyone ever surviving 1674 01:26:15,170 --> 01:26:17,714 a full Roman crucifixion. 1675 01:26:17,714 --> 01:26:23,095 Even the scientific, peer-reviewed, 1676 01:26:23,095 --> 01:26:26,890 secular Journal of the American Medical Association 1677 01:26:26,890 --> 01:26:29,601 conducted an investigation into the death of Jesus, 1678 01:26:29,601 --> 01:26:33,105 and their conclusion was, "Clearly, the weight 1679 01:26:33,105 --> 01:26:35,899 "of the historical and medical evidence indicates 1680 01:26:35,899 --> 01:26:38,402 "that Jesus was dead even before the wound 1681 01:26:38,402 --> 01:26:40,654 to his side was inflicted." 1682 01:26:40,654 --> 01:26:42,948 The second E stands for the word "early." 1683 01:26:42,948 --> 01:26:46,159 We have early reports that Jesus rose from the dead. 1684 01:26:46,159 --> 01:26:48,370 In other words, reports that can be dated back 1685 01:26:48,370 --> 01:26:50,539 very close to the events themselves. 1686 01:26:50,539 --> 01:26:52,207 I used to think, like a lot of skeptics, 1687 01:26:52,207 --> 01:26:54,167 that the resurrection was a legend. 1688 01:26:54,167 --> 01:26:56,503 And I knew it took time for legend to develop 1689 01:26:56,503 --> 01:26:59,631 in the ancient world, so I figured 100, 150 years 1690 01:26:59,631 --> 01:27:02,217 after the death of Jesus, stories were invented, 1691 01:27:02,217 --> 01:27:04,761 mythologies were spun, and that's where the idea 1692 01:27:04,761 --> 01:27:06,596 of the resurrection came from. 1693 01:27:06,596 --> 01:27:08,723 But we have report of the resurrection 1694 01:27:08,723 --> 01:27:10,475 of Jesus Christ, 1695 01:27:10,475 --> 01:27:13,645 including named eyewitnesses and groups of eyewitnesses, 1696 01:27:13,645 --> 01:27:15,856 that has been dated back by scholars 1697 01:27:15,856 --> 01:27:19,025 to within months of his execution. 1698 01:27:19,025 --> 01:27:22,154 That is like a news flash from ancient history. 1699 01:27:22,154 --> 01:27:23,655 So I don't think you can write it off 1700 01:27:23,655 --> 01:27:25,407 as just being a legend. 1701 01:27:25,407 --> 01:27:27,534 The third E stands for "empty." 1702 01:27:27,534 --> 01:27:29,453 We have an empty tomb. 1703 01:27:29,453 --> 01:27:32,038 And the strongest evidence for this is 1704 01:27:32,038 --> 01:27:33,748 that even the opponents of Jesus 1705 01:27:33,748 --> 01:27:36,168 implicitly admitted the tomb was empty. 1706 01:27:36,168 --> 01:27:38,044 There was nobody in the first century 1707 01:27:38,044 --> 01:27:40,464 claiming that, "No, no, no, the body is still there." 1708 01:27:40,464 --> 01:27:42,799 Even the opponents of Jesus said, 1709 01:27:42,799 --> 01:27:45,135 "Oh, well, the disciples stole the body." 1710 01:27:45,135 --> 01:27:47,095 They were conceding the tomb is empty. 1711 01:27:47,095 --> 01:27:49,306 They're trying to explain how it got empty. 1712 01:27:49,306 --> 01:27:51,516 And yet the disciples didn't have the motive, 1713 01:27:51,516 --> 01:27:55,520 the means, or the opportunity to steal the body. 1714 01:27:55,520 --> 01:27:59,024 And then finally, the fourth E stands for "eyewitnesses." 1715 01:27:59,024 --> 01:28:02,986 As I said, most of what we know from ancient history 1716 01:28:02,986 --> 01:28:06,448 are facts based on one or maybe two sources. 1717 01:28:06,448 --> 01:28:09,034 And yet, for the conviction of the disciples 1718 01:28:09,034 --> 01:28:11,036 that they encountered the resurrected Jesus, 1719 01:28:11,036 --> 01:28:14,289 we have no fewer than nine ancient sources 1720 01:28:14,289 --> 01:28:17,417 inside and outside the New Testament, 1721 01:28:17,417 --> 01:28:20,712 confirming and corroborating the conviction of the disciples 1722 01:28:20,712 --> 01:28:23,089 that they encountered the risen Christ. 1723 01:28:23,089 --> 01:28:30,013 ♪ ♪ 1724 01:28:33,600 --> 01:28:36,603 [upbeat music] 1725 01:28:36,603 --> 01:28:43,777 ♪ ♪ 1726 01:28:43,777 --> 01:28:47,072 You know, Luis Palau was not only my hero, 1727 01:28:47,072 --> 01:28:49,741 but he was my friend. 1728 01:28:49,741 --> 01:28:51,743 He was one of the greatest evangelists 1729 01:28:51,743 --> 01:28:53,286 of all time. 1730 01:28:53,286 --> 01:28:58,291 He shared his faith with a billion people. 1731 01:28:58,291 --> 01:29:01,002 He was very winsome, he was very warm, 1732 01:29:01,002 --> 01:29:02,921 and he spoke all over the world, 1733 01:29:02,921 --> 01:29:05,840 radio shows, and books, and so forth. 1734 01:29:05,840 --> 01:29:08,468 But he knew he was dying. 1735 01:29:08,468 --> 01:29:10,720 He had stage IV cancer 1736 01:29:10,720 --> 01:29:13,098 and only had a short time to live. 1737 01:29:13,098 --> 01:29:16,726 And I thought, you know, if I'm investigating Heaven, 1738 01:29:16,726 --> 01:29:18,812 wouldn't it be good to talk to someone 1739 01:29:18,812 --> 01:29:20,897 who's about ready to go there? 1740 01:29:20,897 --> 01:29:27,821 ♪ ♪ 1741 01:29:44,838 --> 01:29:47,591 That's what drew me to Oregon, 1742 01:29:47,591 --> 01:29:52,804 to encounter, one last time, Luis Palau. 1743 01:29:52,804 --> 01:29:55,056 It turned out to be the last major interview 1744 01:29:55,056 --> 01:29:58,101 of his life before he died. 1745 01:29:58,101 --> 01:30:02,355 ♪ ♪ 1746 01:30:07,152 --> 01:30:08,862 Tell me about the moment 1747 01:30:08,862 --> 01:30:10,822 where you heard that Luis passed. 1748 01:30:10,822 --> 01:30:12,949 Where were you? 1749 01:30:12,949 --> 01:30:18,496 - I was at home in Houston and got the news 1750 01:30:18,496 --> 01:30:20,707 through his family that he has passed. 1751 01:30:20,707 --> 01:30:23,543 And you know, I was happy for him 1752 01:30:23,543 --> 01:30:26,129 because he was anxious to go. 1753 01:30:26,129 --> 01:30:28,340 I mean, he said--he told me in the interview, 1754 01:30:28,340 --> 01:30:30,300 he said, "I'm ready." 1755 01:30:30,300 --> 01:30:32,510 And I said, "Are you afraid of death?" 1756 01:30:32,510 --> 01:30:34,137 He said, "No, I'm not. 1757 01:30:34,137 --> 01:30:35,972 "I know to be absent from the body 1758 01:30:35,972 --> 01:30:37,557 is to be present with the Lord." 1759 01:30:37,557 --> 01:30:39,684 - Is it still hard for you to see a friend go like that? 1760 01:30:39,684 --> 01:30:41,770 - Oh, yeah, absolutely, because there's a loss. 1761 01:30:41,770 --> 01:30:43,605 There's a loss of contact. 1762 01:30:43,605 --> 01:30:45,190 There's a loss of relationship. 1763 01:30:45,190 --> 01:30:49,444 You know that he's leaving behind a wife and children. 1764 01:30:49,444 --> 01:30:51,363 And there's a sadness to it. 1765 01:30:51,363 --> 01:30:54,491 I mean, even Jesus wept when Lazarus died... 1766 01:30:54,491 --> 01:30:56,242 Yeah. 1767 01:30:56,242 --> 01:30:57,994 - Even though he knew he was gonna raise him from the dead. 1768 01:30:57,994 --> 01:30:59,579 So it's appropriate 1769 01:30:59,579 --> 01:31:01,998 to mourn when a friend dies. 1770 01:31:01,998 --> 01:31:03,500 And he wasn't just a friend to me. 1771 01:31:03,500 --> 01:31:04,501 He was a hero to me. 1772 01:31:06,419 --> 01:31:07,712 Yeah, yeah. 1773 01:31:09,255 --> 01:31:10,799 Yeah, yeah. 1774 01:31:34,739 --> 01:31:36,116 Yeah. 1775 01:31:40,662 --> 01:31:42,163 Yeah. 1776 01:31:47,919 --> 01:31:49,796 Right, right. 1777 01:31:54,134 --> 01:31:59,806 - Yeah, you know, he told me about attacks 1778 01:31:59,806 --> 01:32:02,100 he believed were from Satan in those final days, 1779 01:32:02,100 --> 01:32:04,853 where, you know, Satan would whisper into his ear, 1780 01:32:04,853 --> 01:32:06,646 you know, "You've told thousands of people, 1781 01:32:06,646 --> 01:32:09,107 "millions of people, a billion people about Jesus, 1782 01:32:09,107 --> 01:32:10,900 "but you're not going to Heaven. 1783 01:32:10,900 --> 01:32:13,528 "You're gonna be one of those that God's gonna say, 1784 01:32:13,528 --> 01:32:15,989 'Depart from me. I didn't know you.'" 1785 01:32:15,989 --> 01:32:18,158 And--which, of course, is crazy, 1786 01:32:18,158 --> 01:32:21,327 but it was--you know, as he said to me at one point, 1787 01:32:21,327 --> 01:32:23,580 he said, "Satan is very good at what he does." 1788 01:32:23,580 --> 01:32:25,331 And the Puritans wrote about this, 1789 01:32:25,331 --> 01:32:29,461 that at the end, sometimes, there's these words from Satan 1790 01:32:29,461 --> 01:32:31,796 to make you feel uncertain 1791 01:32:31,796 --> 01:32:34,424 and to make you question your salvation, so forth. 1792 01:32:34,424 --> 01:32:37,427 And even Luis Palau felt that. 1793 01:32:40,513 --> 01:32:41,890 Yes. 1794 01:32:45,977 --> 01:32:47,187 - Uh-huh. 1795 01:33:23,890 --> 01:33:25,099 Wow. 1796 01:33:26,643 --> 01:33:28,144 Wow. 1797 01:33:40,156 --> 01:33:44,160 ♪ ♪ 1798 01:33:44,160 --> 01:33:45,995 Even if we are confident 1799 01:33:45,995 --> 01:33:47,497 that we're gonna spend eternity with God, 1800 01:33:47,497 --> 01:33:50,041 the process of dying is not appealing. 1801 01:33:50,041 --> 01:33:51,751 Yeah. 1802 01:33:51,751 --> 01:33:53,378 - In other words, nobody wants to go through that. 1803 01:33:53,378 --> 01:33:54,420 And yes, there's gonna be loss, 1804 01:33:54,420 --> 01:33:55,713 and we're not gonna be-- 1805 01:33:55,713 --> 01:33:57,090 Luis said, "I'm not gonna be able 1806 01:33:57,090 --> 01:33:58,883 to pick up the phone and call Pat," his wife, 1807 01:33:58,883 --> 01:34:00,385 "or call my kids." 1808 01:34:00,385 --> 01:34:02,011 You know, he mourned that loss. 1809 01:34:02,011 --> 01:34:03,304 Yeah. 1810 01:34:03,304 --> 01:34:04,556 But at the same time, 1811 01:34:04,556 --> 01:34:06,432 the idea of not just being embraced 1812 01:34:06,432 --> 01:34:08,226 by Jesus in Heaven, 1813 01:34:08,226 --> 01:34:10,228 but to meet Wesley, and Moody... 1814 01:34:10,228 --> 01:34:11,938 Yeah. 1815 01:34:11,938 --> 01:34:13,898 - And Spurgeon, and all these heroes of the faith, 1816 01:34:13,898 --> 01:34:16,025 and to see his father, 1817 01:34:16,025 --> 01:34:18,778 and to have a relationship with him... 1818 01:34:18,778 --> 01:34:20,697 - Yeah. - He didn't get in this world. 1819 01:34:20,697 --> 01:34:23,449 Because we live in a sin-stained world, 1820 01:34:23,449 --> 01:34:27,078 his dad died at an age where Luis was too young 1821 01:34:27,078 --> 01:34:30,331 to really have a full--or relationship with him. 1822 01:34:30,331 --> 01:34:31,916 He will have that in Heaven. 1823 01:34:31,916 --> 01:34:34,544 And I think, deep down, 1824 01:34:34,544 --> 01:34:37,881 Luis has thirsted for that his whole life. 1825 01:34:37,881 --> 01:34:41,676 ♪ ♪ 1826 01:34:50,268 --> 01:34:51,811 [speaking Spanish] 1827 01:35:35,521 --> 01:35:38,775 - And even as your father was a poor example, 1828 01:35:38,775 --> 01:35:41,694 and your mother left your family, 1829 01:35:41,694 --> 01:35:43,863 you come to the living Father. 1830 01:35:43,863 --> 01:35:45,990 He is the ideal Father. 1831 01:35:45,990 --> 01:35:47,951 And Jesus says, "Young man, 1832 01:35:47,951 --> 01:35:50,453 "you've got to make your own decision. 1833 01:35:50,453 --> 01:35:53,790 "You cannot have a thirdhand faith. 1834 01:35:53,790 --> 01:35:56,793 "You cannot inherit your faith from your folks 1835 01:35:56,793 --> 01:35:58,211 "or your grandparents. 1836 01:35:58,211 --> 01:36:01,422 God has no grandchildren." 1837 01:36:01,422 --> 01:36:05,176 Jesus Christ is relevant today to the Soviet Union. 1838 01:36:05,176 --> 01:36:08,763 [speaking Russian] 1839 01:36:08,763 --> 01:36:10,640 - As far as the east is from the west... 1840 01:36:10,640 --> 01:36:13,142 [speaking Russian] 1841 01:36:13,142 --> 01:36:15,103 - So far he removes our transgressions. 1842 01:36:15,103 --> 01:36:17,605 [speaking Russian] 1843 01:36:17,605 --> 01:36:19,857 - You will never forget this night. 1844 01:36:19,857 --> 01:36:22,652 [speaking Chinese] 1845 01:36:22,652 --> 01:36:24,112 I know I'll never forget it. 1846 01:36:29,951 --> 01:36:35,331 ♪ No hay lugar más alto ♪ 1847 01:36:41,879 --> 01:36:44,841 [singing Spanish] 1848 01:36:44,841 --> 01:36:51,764 ♪ ♪ 1849 01:36:54,934 --> 01:36:59,731 - I am sure because now I have children of my own 1850 01:36:59,731 --> 01:37:03,651 that for Mom and Dad to see the direction I was going, 1851 01:37:03,651 --> 01:37:08,322 to see my love of partying, 1852 01:37:08,322 --> 01:37:10,825 and--even though I was a respectful kid, 1853 01:37:10,825 --> 01:37:14,746 I think they knew I was moving in the wrong direction. 1854 01:37:14,746 --> 01:37:18,458 A lot of times, people will say things to me like, 1855 01:37:18,458 --> 01:37:21,878 "I know why you were such a rebellious kid, 1856 01:37:21,878 --> 01:37:24,630 "because your dad was heavy-handed 1857 01:37:24,630 --> 01:37:26,466 "or, you know, he was shoving his religion 1858 01:37:26,466 --> 01:37:27,675 down your throat." 1859 01:37:27,675 --> 01:37:29,510 And I've always really resisted that 1860 01:37:29,510 --> 01:37:31,429 because that's not the fact in my case. 1861 01:37:31,429 --> 01:37:34,390 [soft music] 1862 01:37:34,390 --> 01:37:37,185 ♪ ♪ 1863 01:37:37,185 --> 01:37:39,896 This place, this cemetery, 1864 01:37:39,896 --> 01:37:43,483 is kind of representative of one of those places, 1865 01:37:43,483 --> 01:37:46,778 probably everybody has something like this in life. 1866 01:37:46,778 --> 01:37:49,530 It sort of represents some of the worst parts, 1867 01:37:49,530 --> 01:37:52,158 most foolish parts of my life. 1868 01:37:52,158 --> 01:37:55,119 And now, you know, to have Dad buried here, 1869 01:37:55,119 --> 01:37:56,788 my grandparents buried here, 1870 01:37:56,788 --> 01:37:59,290 it's just a place of great reflection, 1871 01:37:59,290 --> 01:38:02,710 and it represents the gratitude of my heart 1872 01:38:02,710 --> 01:38:05,171 for the love of my parents. 1873 01:38:09,050 --> 01:38:12,011 [upbeat piano music] 1874 01:38:12,011 --> 01:38:16,557 ♪ ♪ 1875 01:38:16,557 --> 01:38:18,810 Humanly speaking, 1876 01:38:18,810 --> 01:38:21,562 I would want one more day, one more week. 1877 01:38:21,562 --> 01:38:23,689 I would want more time. 1878 01:38:23,689 --> 01:38:27,401 So when we say it was an untimely death, 1879 01:38:27,401 --> 01:38:30,613 not in God's economy, it wasn't. 1880 01:38:30,613 --> 01:38:34,283 To me, Luis lived 86 years. 1881 01:38:34,283 --> 01:38:37,954 We were married for 60. That's not enough. 1882 01:38:37,954 --> 01:38:41,499 ♪ ♪ 1883 01:38:43,000 --> 01:38:45,920 I am teaching myself to say he died. 1884 01:38:45,920 --> 01:38:49,632 He didn't pass. He isn't lost. 1885 01:38:49,632 --> 01:38:53,594 Because it's reality. 1886 01:38:53,594 --> 01:38:56,013 You know, the other words--lost? 1887 01:38:56,013 --> 01:38:58,391 He's not lost. I know where he is. 1888 01:38:58,391 --> 01:39:05,314 ♪ ♪ 1889 01:39:22,874 --> 01:39:24,542 - Do you remember the moment when you first saw her, 1890 01:39:24,542 --> 01:39:26,002 first, like, actually talked to her? 1891 01:39:26,002 --> 01:39:28,087 - Yeah, We were outside the train station in Chicago. 1892 01:39:28,087 --> 01:39:31,716 I was with a friend of mine, and she was with a guy 1893 01:39:31,716 --> 01:39:35,094 from my neighborhood who she had met at a dance. 1894 01:39:35,094 --> 01:39:37,889 And he saw me and recognized me. 1895 01:39:37,889 --> 01:39:39,515 "Hey, Lee," and "Yeah," 1896 01:39:39,515 --> 01:39:40,850 and we came over, and we were talking, 1897 01:39:40,850 --> 01:39:42,351 and he introduced me to this girl. 1898 01:39:42,351 --> 01:39:44,270 And I thought, 1899 01:39:44,270 --> 01:39:46,898 "Wow, I'll have to find out how to contact her." 1900 01:39:46,898 --> 01:39:48,357 And... 1901 01:39:48,357 --> 01:39:50,318 - Did you know at 14 she would be the one? 1902 01:39:50,318 --> 01:39:51,694 - She went home and told her mom, 1903 01:39:51,694 --> 01:39:53,362 "I met the boy I'm gonna marry." 1904 01:39:53,362 --> 01:39:55,865 Her mom was kind of condescending. 1905 01:39:55,865 --> 01:39:57,366 "Oh, sure, you did," you know. 1906 01:39:57,366 --> 01:39:59,911 And so I think, just to prove her wrong, 1907 01:39:59,911 --> 01:40:02,371 she married me. 1908 01:40:02,371 --> 01:40:04,248 - This is the no-champagne wedding. 1909 01:40:04,248 --> 01:40:05,583 - That was the no-champagne wedding. 1910 01:40:05,583 --> 01:40:07,168 Yep, that's right. 1911 01:40:07,168 --> 01:40:08,669 We were so young when we got married, 1912 01:40:08,669 --> 01:40:09,921 they had champagne glasses, 1913 01:40:09,921 --> 01:40:11,380 but we couldn't drink champagne, 1914 01:40:11,380 --> 01:40:13,090 'cause we were too young, so they were filled with milk. 1915 01:40:13,090 --> 01:40:15,343 [laughs] 1916 01:40:15,343 --> 01:40:19,722 - What does Leslie mean to you, personally, as Lee, the guy? 1917 01:40:19,722 --> 01:40:21,015 - Yeah. - Not the author, not the dad. 1918 01:40:21,015 --> 01:40:22,350 - Yeah. - Just Lee. 1919 01:40:22,350 --> 01:40:25,394 - You know, we're best of friends. 1920 01:40:25,394 --> 01:40:28,314 You know, meeting as young as we did, 1921 01:40:28,314 --> 01:40:31,067 at 14, kind of growing up together in that way, 1922 01:40:31,067 --> 01:40:33,152 through those tumultuous high school years, 1923 01:40:33,152 --> 01:40:37,448 and then college, we just bonded very strongly. 1924 01:40:37,448 --> 01:40:40,117 And she's just my best friend. 1925 01:40:40,117 --> 01:40:42,662 I can't imagine life without her. 1926 01:40:42,662 --> 01:40:45,414 I can't imagine where I would be 1927 01:40:45,414 --> 01:40:47,833 if God hadn't brought her into my life. 1928 01:40:47,833 --> 01:40:50,670 ♪ ♪ 1929 01:40:50,670 --> 01:40:56,133 - You know, I don't remember, at any moment, 1930 01:40:56,133 --> 01:40:58,427 feeling like I was ready to give up. 1931 01:40:58,427 --> 01:41:03,307 I remember worrying that he would walk out, 1932 01:41:03,307 --> 01:41:07,812 that he would say he'd had enough. 1933 01:41:07,812 --> 01:41:09,522 I was also convinced 1934 01:41:09,522 --> 01:41:12,525 it was gonna be a deathbed conversion. 1935 01:41:12,525 --> 01:41:14,610 I didn't imagine him ever accepting Christ 1936 01:41:14,610 --> 01:41:17,280 until maybe on his deathbed. 1937 01:41:17,280 --> 01:41:20,491 ♪ ♪ 1938 01:41:20,491 --> 01:41:23,369 Oftentimes, I could sense God saying, 1939 01:41:23,369 --> 01:41:25,913 "Remember, you have the truth. 1940 01:41:25,913 --> 01:41:28,249 "He doesn't. He doesn't know. 1941 01:41:28,249 --> 01:41:31,043 "You're expecting him to act in a way 1942 01:41:31,043 --> 01:41:32,670 "he's incapable of acting. 1943 01:41:32,670 --> 01:41:35,131 "Hold your anger. Hold your tongue. 1944 01:41:35,131 --> 01:41:37,133 "Do what's right. Be patient. 1945 01:41:37,133 --> 01:41:39,593 I'm bigger than both of you." 1946 01:41:45,349 --> 01:41:48,394 - I'm unaware of ever having reached anyone for the Lord. 1947 01:41:48,394 --> 01:41:52,189 I see myself as a link in the chain--other than Lee. 1948 01:41:52,189 --> 01:41:55,151 [dramatic music] 1949 01:41:55,151 --> 01:42:02,074 ♪ ♪ 1950 01:42:21,177 --> 01:42:27,058 - ♪ Let me wipe your tears away ♪ 1951 01:42:27,058 --> 01:42:29,226 - If we accept what the near-death experiences 1952 01:42:29,226 --> 01:42:31,270 tell us about life reviews, 1953 01:42:31,270 --> 01:42:33,481 people talk about how they almost feel like 1954 01:42:33,481 --> 01:42:36,525 they're judging themselves, and that from Jesus, 1955 01:42:36,525 --> 01:42:38,152 they're getting a sense of mercy, 1956 01:42:38,152 --> 01:42:40,529 forgiveness, grace, and love. 1957 01:42:40,529 --> 01:42:43,574 And so from that perspective, I think it's not gonna be 1958 01:42:43,574 --> 01:42:45,576 as daunting of an experience 1959 01:42:45,576 --> 01:42:47,912 as maybe I otherwise thought it would be. 1960 01:42:47,912 --> 01:42:49,872 ♪ Wipe your tears ♪ 1961 01:42:49,872 --> 01:42:51,749 - Yeah, I remember getting the job 1962 01:42:51,749 --> 01:42:53,626 at the "Chicago Tribune" and wanting 1963 01:42:53,626 --> 01:42:56,879 to have that front-page byline the first time, 1964 01:42:56,879 --> 01:42:59,965 knowing my dad would open it and see it. 1965 01:42:59,965 --> 01:43:01,759 "That's Lee!" 1966 01:43:01,759 --> 01:43:04,512 And just show him that I've accomplished something, 1967 01:43:04,512 --> 01:43:06,722 I've become somebody. 1968 01:43:06,722 --> 01:43:10,226 ♪ ♪ 1969 01:43:10,226 --> 01:43:13,771 I think of the split second that our lives intersected 1970 01:43:13,771 --> 01:43:16,607 on a street corner in downtown Chicago. 1971 01:43:16,607 --> 01:43:19,235 There's no way, humanly speaking, 1972 01:43:19,235 --> 01:43:20,820 that we ever would have met. 1973 01:43:20,820 --> 01:43:22,196 It was the beginning 1974 01:43:22,196 --> 01:43:24,240 of this incredible relationship. 1975 01:43:24,240 --> 01:43:26,951 ♪ ♪ 1976 01:43:26,951 --> 01:43:30,871 She tolerated me during those years of rebellion 1977 01:43:30,871 --> 01:43:34,208 'cause I was angry and lashing out many times. 1978 01:43:34,208 --> 01:43:36,419 But she persevered. She prayed. 1979 01:43:36,419 --> 01:43:40,673 She prayed for me every day for two years. 1980 01:43:40,673 --> 01:43:43,426 My daughter, Alison-- when she was a toddler, 1981 01:43:43,426 --> 01:43:45,845 if she was alone in the living room, 1982 01:43:45,845 --> 01:43:47,972 playing with some blocks, some toys, or whatever, 1983 01:43:47,972 --> 01:43:50,015 and she would hear me come home from work 1984 01:43:50,015 --> 01:43:52,810 through the front door, her natural reaction was just 1985 01:43:52,810 --> 01:43:54,728 to gather her toys, and go in her room, 1986 01:43:54,728 --> 01:43:56,355 and shut the door. 1987 01:43:56,355 --> 01:43:58,149 "Was he gonna be drunk again? 1988 01:43:58,149 --> 01:44:00,609 "Was he gonna be yelling, and screaming, 1989 01:44:00,609 --> 01:44:02,445 "and kicking holes in the wall? 1990 01:44:02,445 --> 01:44:06,824 At least it was nice and quiet in here." 1991 01:44:06,824 --> 01:44:09,827 It was four or five months after I became a Christian, 1992 01:44:09,827 --> 01:44:13,289 and Alison had begun to see changes in me, 1993 01:44:13,289 --> 01:44:15,291 and so one Sunday morning, 1994 01:44:15,291 --> 01:44:17,376 she came up to Leslie, and she said, 1995 01:44:17,376 --> 01:44:22,006 "I want God to do for me what he's done for Daddy." 1996 01:44:22,006 --> 01:44:24,675 God changes everything. 1997 01:44:24,675 --> 01:44:31,599 ♪ ♪ 1998 01:44:41,400 --> 01:44:44,111 So I asked Luis, I said, "Luis, if you could send 1999 01:44:44,111 --> 01:44:46,280 "a text message back from Heaven, 2000 01:44:46,280 --> 01:44:49,783 what do you think it would say?" 2001 01:44:49,783 --> 01:44:51,660 And he thought for a second, and then he said, 2002 01:44:51,660 --> 01:44:54,663 "I think I'd say, 'Go for it.'" 2003 01:44:54,663 --> 01:44:56,874 ♪ ♪ 2004 01:44:56,874 --> 01:44:58,918 If we believe that Heaven is true, 2005 01:44:58,918 --> 01:45:00,419 that it's real, 2006 01:45:00,419 --> 01:45:02,338 that should affect our everyday lives, 2007 01:45:02,338 --> 01:45:04,590 our attitudes, our perspective, 2008 01:45:04,590 --> 01:45:07,301 the way we treat people, the way we spend our money, 2009 01:45:07,301 --> 01:45:08,969 the way we spend our time. 2010 01:45:08,969 --> 01:45:11,347 It should ripple through every aspect 2011 01:45:11,347 --> 01:45:13,390 of our lives. 2012 01:45:13,390 --> 01:45:15,434 At some point, we realize 2013 01:45:15,434 --> 01:45:18,354 that when we close our eyes in this world, 2014 01:45:18,354 --> 01:45:20,648 that isn't the end of our existence, 2015 01:45:20,648 --> 01:45:23,609 but there's another chapter to come. 2016 01:45:23,609 --> 01:45:30,533 ♪ ♪ 2017 01:45:54,390 --> 01:45:58,185 ♪ Where did you go ♪ 2018 01:45:58,185 --> 01:46:02,147 ♪ Where I could not follow? ♪ 2019 01:46:02,147 --> 01:46:06,318 ♪ A place to call home ♪ 2020 01:46:06,318 --> 01:46:10,072 ♪ Where time can't be borrowed ♪ 2021 01:46:10,072 --> 01:46:14,368 ♪ I'm waiting for a sign ♪ 2022 01:46:14,368 --> 01:46:18,330 ♪ I'm waiting for you ♪ 2023 01:46:18,330 --> 01:46:22,376 ♪ Now we're worlds apart ♪ 2024 01:46:22,376 --> 01:46:26,714 ♪ But how could that be? ♪ 2025 01:46:26,714 --> 01:46:30,342 ♪ It was never fair for me to say goodbye ♪ 2026 01:46:30,342 --> 01:46:34,305 ♪ When I never said hello ♪ 2027 01:46:34,305 --> 01:46:37,850 ♪ I'm waiting for you ♪ 2028 01:46:37,850 --> 01:46:42,104 ♪ I hope that I'll meet you someday ♪ 2029 01:46:42,104 --> 01:46:45,357 ♪ There's something inside me that speaks to me ♪ 2030 01:46:45,357 --> 01:46:49,820 ♪ Comforts me, guides me, and shows me the way ♪ 2031 01:46:49,820 --> 01:46:53,991 ♪ While I'm caught between Heaven and Hell ♪ 2032 01:46:53,991 --> 01:46:58,954 ♪ ♪ 2033 01:46:58,954 --> 01:47:02,875 ♪ I lie awake ♪ 2034 01:47:02,875 --> 01:47:07,254 ♪ In dark, lonely nights ♪ 2035 01:47:07,254 --> 01:47:10,382 ♪ All these memories that could have been ♪ 2036 01:47:10,382 --> 01:47:14,762 ♪ These pictures, they keep me awake ♪ 2037 01:47:14,762 --> 01:47:18,849 ♪ I'm waiting for a sign ♪ 2038 01:47:18,849 --> 01:47:22,353 ♪ I'm waiting for you ♪ 2039 01:47:22,353 --> 01:47:26,607 ♪ I hope that I'll meet you someday ♪ 2040 01:47:26,607 --> 01:47:29,568 ♪ There's something inside me that speaks to me ♪ 2041 01:47:29,568 --> 01:47:34,239 ♪ Comforts me, guides me, and shows me the way ♪ 2042 01:47:34,239 --> 01:47:38,577 ♪ While I'm caught between Heaven and Hell ♪ 2043 01:47:38,577 --> 01:47:42,623 ♪ I hope that I'll meet you someday ♪ 2044 01:47:42,623 --> 01:47:45,959 ♪ There's something inside me that speaks to me ♪ 2045 01:47:45,959 --> 01:47:50,297 ♪ Comforts me, guides me, and shows me the way ♪ 2046 01:47:50,297 --> 01:47:54,677 ♪ While I'm caught between Heaven and Hell ♪ 2047 01:47:54,677 --> 01:48:01,600 ♪ ♪ 2048 01:49:01,326 --> 01:49:07,624 ♪ You, I hope that I'll meet you someday ♪ 2049 01:49:07,624 --> 01:49:10,794 ♪ There's something inside me that speaks to me ♪ 2050 01:49:10,794 --> 01:49:15,299 ♪ Comforts me, guides me, and shows me the way ♪ 2051 01:49:15,299 --> 01:49:19,845 ♪ While I'm caught between Heaven and Hell ♪ 2052 01:49:19,845 --> 01:49:23,724 ♪ I hope that I'll meet you someday ♪ 2053 01:49:23,724 --> 01:49:27,102 ♪ There's something inside me that speaks to me ♪ 2054 01:49:27,102 --> 01:49:31,523 ♪ Comforts me, guides me, and shows me the way ♪ 2055 01:49:31,523 --> 01:49:35,611 ♪ While I'm caught between Heaven and Hell ♪ 2056 01:49:35,611 --> 01:49:39,656 ♪ ♪