1 00:00:00,625 --> 00:00:02,210 [TV static drones] 2 00:00:02,210 --> 00:00:04,838 [bright tone] 3 00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:07,757 [unsettling music] 4 00:00:07,757 --> 00:00:09,718 No one will biopsy my mole, 5 00:00:09,718 --> 00:00:11,553 so I need to upload myself so I don't die, 6 00:00:11,553 --> 00:00:13,638 but even they require Proof of Existence, 7 00:00:13,638 --> 00:00:15,390 which I don't want to get, 8 00:00:15,390 --> 00:00:18,059 so instead, I have to become an exception by being famous. 9 00:00:18,059 --> 00:00:19,436 - Hello? - Hi. 10 00:00:19,436 --> 00:00:20,937 Hey, how are you? 11 00:00:20,937 --> 00:00:22,814 Okay, so I have an idea 12 00:00:22,814 --> 00:00:24,315 that I'm sure will make me an exception. 13 00:00:24,315 --> 00:00:25,316 Do you wanna hear it? 14 00:00:25,316 --> 00:00:27,152 - I'm in a meeting. - Okay. 15 00:00:27,152 --> 00:00:30,447 A couple of years ago, during a really harsh winter, 16 00:00:30,447 --> 00:00:32,449 a dolphin got stuck in a canal in South Brooklyn. 17 00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:33,783 Uh-huh. 18 00:00:33,783 --> 00:00:35,702 It got trapped and everyone could see it. 19 00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:37,829 But the environmental laws meant to protect it 20 00:00:37,829 --> 00:00:40,331 stated that no one could help it without the proper permit. 21 00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:42,834 Long story short, it ended up dying. 22 00:00:42,834 --> 00:00:45,920 And, well, I guess that's where this fun 23 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:47,881 family movie would end. 24 00:00:49,257 --> 00:00:50,300 What do you think? 25 00:00:50,300 --> 00:00:52,010 Hello? Hello? 26 00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:53,511 Hello, are you there? Do you like it? 27 00:00:53,511 --> 00:00:54,929 What do you think? 28 00:00:54,929 --> 00:00:58,683 What about something about your story? 29 00:00:58,683 --> 00:01:00,810 That's my story through metaphor. 30 00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:02,896 No, babe, no metaphors. 31 00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:05,899 Just big, sad speeches. 32 00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:09,194 Call it... Gaytino. 33 00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:11,488 Vanesja, Gaytinx. 34 00:01:11,488 --> 00:01:14,199 Listen, do the credit card commercial, 35 00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:18,870 get what you need out of it, and move on. 36 00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:20,789 Okay. [bell ringing] 37 00:01:20,789 --> 00:01:22,540 Okay, yeah. 38 00:01:22,540 --> 00:01:23,541 Okay. 39 00:01:23,541 --> 00:01:26,044 Roll playback on beach. 40 00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:29,381 [soft festive music playing] 41 00:01:29,381 --> 00:01:31,841 And action. 42 00:01:31,841 --> 00:01:34,052 Julio. Hi. 43 00:01:34,052 --> 00:01:37,806 So imagine you're on the beach and you're happy. 44 00:01:42,394 --> 00:01:44,771 On the beach and you're happy. 45 00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:46,481 Jesus. 46 00:01:46,481 --> 00:01:48,233 His mouth is so tense. 47 00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:50,860 And it's like, you know, I don't get it. 48 00:01:50,860 --> 00:01:52,404 Does he not love credit cards? 49 00:01:52,404 --> 00:01:53,655 It's a safe and convenient way to earn miles. 50 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:56,199 I mean, that's the brief. It's not--okay. 51 00:01:56,199 --> 00:01:57,909 [exhales] 52 00:01:57,909 --> 00:02:01,204 Julio, can we get a smile? 53 00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:02,288 Uh, yeah. 54 00:02:06,376 --> 00:02:07,544 Okay. 55 00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:09,504 Less teeth. Like, uh... 56 00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:14,009 Okay, can you bring in the green tape? 57 00:02:14,009 --> 00:02:15,301 Amazing. Thank you. 58 00:02:15,301 --> 00:02:18,013 Hi again. Um, do you-- 59 00:02:18,013 --> 00:02:19,097 Perfect. 60 00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:24,602 Yes. That. No, it's like, joy. 61 00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:29,274 Julio, your eyes are so, so fantastic 62 00:02:29,274 --> 00:02:31,109 and energized and expressive. 63 00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:33,028 You know, we just wanna green screen something 64 00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:34,362 that'll match that energy. 65 00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:38,158 From the top. 66 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:42,787 You are on the beach and you are very happy. 67 00:02:42,787 --> 00:02:44,289 Hold it a little higher. 68 00:02:44,289 --> 00:02:46,499 Yes, great. 69 00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:48,251 Like you're almost surprised. 70 00:02:48,251 --> 00:02:49,461 Like money. 71 00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:50,628 Stunning. 72 00:02:50,628 --> 00:02:51,629 Great. 73 00:02:51,629 --> 00:02:52,797 Incredible. 74 00:02:52,797 --> 00:02:55,800 [mysterious music] 75 00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:57,844 ♪ ♪ 76 00:03:00,805 --> 00:03:02,766 [doorbell rings] 77 00:03:07,312 --> 00:03:08,897 Yeah, hi, Pirulinpinpina. 78 00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:11,983 I--ooh, wasn't expecting you to be slimy. 79 00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:19,574 Okay, I wanted to talk to you about this post 80 00:03:19,574 --> 00:03:20,825 that you made on my behalf. 81 00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:24,079 Sure. 82 00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:25,914 It's a picture of me sleeping and it says, 83 00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:28,416 "Let's get this mondais right." 84 00:03:28,416 --> 00:03:29,918 It was posted Wednesday at 3:00 a.m. 85 00:03:34,172 --> 00:03:35,715 Okay, I guess I just don't understand 86 00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:38,385 what the point of that picture is. 87 00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:39,719 Did you just post this? 88 00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:45,266 "Many apologies for earlier mispost. 89 00:03:45,266 --> 00:03:48,353 "A grave error on my part, as eyes were closed. 90 00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:49,479 "Please forgive. 91 00:03:49,479 --> 00:03:50,855 "Let's get this Monday right. 92 00:03:50,855 --> 00:03:54,776 It's Friday, eight twenty too pm." 93 00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:57,570 Pirulinpinpina, this doesn't sound like me at all. 94 00:03:59,698 --> 00:04:01,324 Pirulinpinpina? 95 00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:06,413 I'm not using tone with you. 96 00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:07,455 Don't use tone with her. 97 00:04:07,455 --> 00:04:09,791 I wasn't. I wasn't using tone. 98 00:04:09,791 --> 00:04:10,875 Jesus. 99 00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:15,255 Vanesja, are you sure this is gonna make me 100 00:04:15,255 --> 00:04:16,965 an exception to Proof? 101 00:04:16,965 --> 00:04:18,591 I'm not sure about this, 102 00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:23,054 but I have high hopes for the commercial. 103 00:04:23,054 --> 00:04:24,139 [ringtone melody plays] Hold on. 104 00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:25,432 Another client needs me. 105 00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:30,145 Hello, my dark star. 106 00:04:30,145 --> 00:04:34,024 I have some big, bad news. 107 00:04:34,024 --> 00:04:36,985 The poster for "Cunty Little Rich Kids" came out. 108 00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:39,195 They went with the picture you don't like, 109 00:04:39,195 --> 00:04:42,323 and the airline mishandled your luggage, 110 00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:46,578 so you'll have to wear something of mine. 111 00:04:48,913 --> 00:04:50,915 Oh. 112 00:04:50,915 --> 00:04:51,958 Wow. 113 00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:53,251 Red suits you. 114 00:04:53,251 --> 00:04:55,086 Yeah, everything suits me. 115 00:04:55,086 --> 00:04:59,424 Dustin, what's going on in that little head of yours? 116 00:04:59,424 --> 00:05:00,550 I don't know. 117 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:09,684 Share. 118 00:05:11,770 --> 00:05:14,689 I just feel like the world is so fucked up. 119 00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:18,693 I've been on this show for, like, 15 fucking seasons 120 00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:21,780 and, yeah, I make a shit-ton of money, right? 121 00:05:21,780 --> 00:05:26,951 And I've got a house in Bali, PlayStation. 122 00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:30,038 It all kicks ass. 123 00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:32,082 But like, for what? 124 00:05:32,082 --> 00:05:35,752 You want another PlayStation? 125 00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:39,547 Yeah, if we could get that going, that'd be--no, no, no. 126 00:05:39,547 --> 00:05:41,216 Damn it. 127 00:05:41,216 --> 00:05:43,218 I took the subway yesterday. 128 00:05:43,218 --> 00:05:44,928 Dustin, why? 129 00:05:44,928 --> 00:05:46,471 'Cause I don't wanna be in a car. 130 00:05:46,471 --> 00:05:48,264 I wanna be out in the world. 131 00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:51,226 I wanna be living and experiencing. 132 00:05:51,226 --> 00:05:53,853 Anyway, the train was, like, super delayed, 133 00:05:53,853 --> 00:05:55,980 and I started talking to this homeless man. 134 00:05:55,980 --> 00:05:59,317 I said, hey, what's your name? 135 00:05:59,317 --> 00:06:00,985 I'm Dustin. 136 00:06:00,985 --> 00:06:02,821 And he said he had to take a shit, 137 00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:05,657 and he said he couldn't, and I asked him why. 138 00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:09,661 And he told me that he'd have to exit the station 139 00:06:09,661 --> 00:06:11,371 in order to do that. 140 00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:13,957 And re-entering, he'd have to pay money, and he can't. 141 00:06:13,957 --> 00:06:15,625 And, like, in that moment, I like, 142 00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:20,380 went into my, like, empathic trance. 143 00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,841 And so I was just in his shoes... 144 00:06:22,841 --> 00:06:25,218 [imitates whoosh] 145 00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,594 Seeing his perspective. 146 00:06:26,594 --> 00:06:30,515 It was like... [trilling tongue] 147 00:06:32,684 --> 00:06:36,813 You know. And, like, I saw it. 148 00:06:36,813 --> 00:06:39,357 I saw it from his point of view. 149 00:06:39,357 --> 00:06:41,860 The world's not fucking fair. 150 00:06:41,860 --> 00:06:43,695 And that's just one dude. 151 00:06:43,695 --> 00:06:45,488 There's so many like him. 152 00:06:45,488 --> 00:06:46,698 And what am I doing? 153 00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:48,116 I should help. 154 00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:52,954 'Cause why else-- why else am I an artist 155 00:06:52,954 --> 00:06:55,331 if not to make the world a better place? 156 00:06:55,331 --> 00:06:57,709 We can use this. 157 00:06:57,709 --> 00:07:01,796 We can do an interview 158 00:07:01,796 --> 00:07:03,715 with "Teen Vogue." 159 00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:06,885 "Teen Vogue." I'm fucking 39 years old! 160 00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:08,219 The fuck. 161 00:07:08,219 --> 00:07:10,805 Don't share that. 162 00:07:10,805 --> 00:07:12,557 You don't even get it. 163 00:07:15,393 --> 00:07:16,728 You're just a suit. 164 00:07:18,855 --> 00:07:22,108 Big, corporate, powerful suit lady. 165 00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:26,446 You don't care about the problems of people. 166 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:29,657 [ominous music] 167 00:07:29,657 --> 00:07:34,579 The next L train will arrive in 178 minutes. 168 00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:36,831 Fuck my life. 169 00:07:36,831 --> 00:07:38,208 I hate New York. 170 00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:41,586 - Oh, my God. - What? 171 00:07:41,586 --> 00:07:43,254 It's my roommate. Don't look. 172 00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:45,382 Oh, like, one of the little ones? 173 00:07:45,382 --> 00:07:46,841 Yeah. 174 00:07:46,841 --> 00:07:47,967 Vibes bad? 175 00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:49,594 Oh, my God. 176 00:07:49,594 --> 00:07:50,970 I didn't tell you what happened. 177 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,639 Mm-mm. 178 00:07:52,639 --> 00:07:55,266 Okay, so at first, 179 00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:56,601 things were pretty chill, right? 180 00:07:56,601 --> 00:07:57,686 Yeah. 181 00:08:00,939 --> 00:08:02,440 When she moved in, she said she had some cousins 182 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:03,525 that were gonna come. 183 00:08:03,525 --> 00:08:04,734 Not cousins. 184 00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:06,194 Nothing's ever good when they bring cousins. 185 00:08:06,194 --> 00:08:08,113 - And could they stay with us? - Ew. 186 00:08:10,365 --> 00:08:12,701 And I was like, yeah, okay, whatever. 187 00:08:12,701 --> 00:08:14,244 I mean, you're so tiny. Who cares, right? 188 00:08:14,244 --> 00:08:15,453 Right. 189 00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:17,706 So they come, and there's like nine of them. 190 00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:18,832 Again, no big deal. 191 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:19,916 Right, 'cause they're so small. 192 00:08:19,916 --> 00:08:21,793 Right. And I don't know, I figured 193 00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:23,670 they're gonna go see the Statue of Liberty, 194 00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:25,547 be out and about, whatever. - Sure. 195 00:08:25,547 --> 00:08:28,049 But then one night they're like, hey, 196 00:08:28,049 --> 00:08:29,426 what should we do tomorrow? 197 00:08:29,426 --> 00:08:31,970 And I'm like, have you ever been to the Met? 198 00:08:31,970 --> 00:08:33,096 And they're like... 199 00:08:35,140 --> 00:08:36,099 Wait, what? 200 00:08:36,099 --> 00:08:37,392 I don't know, they're like, 201 00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:39,561 strangely Christian, like, evangelist. 202 00:08:39,561 --> 00:08:40,645 I don't know, whatever. 203 00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:42,313 It's annoying, but I figure they'll go soon. 204 00:08:42,313 --> 00:08:44,607 Oh, also, they're obsessed with pizza? 205 00:08:44,607 --> 00:08:46,067 What, do they, like, eat your pizza? 206 00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,402 Not like that, no. 207 00:08:47,402 --> 00:08:48,820 It's like I bring pizza home, 208 00:08:48,820 --> 00:08:50,321 and they run out with little cameras 209 00:08:50,321 --> 00:08:52,032 and take pictures of the pizza. 210 00:08:56,161 --> 00:08:57,620 That's horrifying. 211 00:08:57,620 --> 00:08:59,080 Anyway, later, 212 00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:02,292 Pirulinpinpina's like, hey, can they move in? 213 00:09:02,292 --> 00:09:03,710 - No. - Yeah. 214 00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:05,128 She's so freaking tacky. 215 00:09:05,128 --> 00:09:07,255 And I'm like, what? Right? 216 00:09:07,255 --> 00:09:08,340 And she's like... 217 00:09:11,468 --> 00:09:14,346 So I'm kind of like, yeah, okay, whatever. 218 00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:19,267 But what I didn't know is that they, uh, multiply. 219 00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:20,810 Do they, like, reproduce? 220 00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:22,437 It's not a sex thing. 221 00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:25,690 It's just like, more of them arrive. 222 00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:27,442 So anyway, now there's, like, 50 of them. 223 00:09:27,442 --> 00:09:28,902 - 50? - Yeah. 224 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:30,028 There's 50? 225 00:09:35,158 --> 00:09:37,202 And some of them are gay. 226 00:09:37,202 --> 00:09:38,828 Living for that. 227 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:40,622 Yeah, it's, like, impossible to get on Grindr 228 00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:42,332 because the whole grid is little ones. 229 00:09:42,332 --> 00:09:45,877 Anyway, one night I'm doing my go-go shift at Metro. 230 00:09:45,877 --> 00:09:48,880 [pounding dance music playing] 231 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,216 ♪ ♪ 232 00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:53,343 And I see the cutie from the gym. 233 00:09:53,343 --> 00:09:54,678 Ooh, the one with the big lips? 234 00:09:54,678 --> 00:09:56,221 - Mm-hmm. - He's cute. 235 00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:57,389 Mm-hmm. And I'm making eyes at him. 236 00:09:57,389 --> 00:09:59,557 He's making eyes at me. We're, like, vibing, right? 237 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:00,725 Mm-hmm. 238 00:10:00,725 --> 00:10:02,519 So I invite him home. 239 00:10:10,235 --> 00:10:13,655 [soft ominous music] 240 00:10:13,655 --> 00:10:14,948 Can I get you anything? 241 00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:16,282 I'm starving. 242 00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:17,784 We should have grabbed some pizza. 243 00:10:20,245 --> 00:10:21,287 Who are these? 244 00:10:22,414 --> 00:10:24,165 These are the little ones. They're my roommates. 245 00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:26,251 Uh, they're from Wisconsin. 246 00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:27,335 They love pizza. 247 00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:32,549 Guys, come on. I got company. 248 00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:34,384 - TV! - Oh, shit. 249 00:10:34,384 --> 00:10:36,428 You guys watch "True Women of New York"? 250 00:10:36,428 --> 00:10:37,887 Guys, come on. 251 00:10:37,887 --> 00:10:40,432 So at this point, we're having, like, a little party, 252 00:10:40,432 --> 00:10:42,058 like drinks, whatever. 253 00:10:42,058 --> 00:10:44,227 So I decided to take this time to go and douche. 254 00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:46,521 - Douche for that guy? - Yeah. 255 00:10:46,521 --> 00:10:48,440 Okay, not the vibes I was getting, but work. 256 00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:51,109 So anyway, I'm in the bathroom for a while, 257 00:10:51,109 --> 00:10:53,862 and the party's still going on outside, so it's no big deal. 258 00:10:53,862 --> 00:10:59,451 But then I hear the party stop, so I go outside. 259 00:10:59,451 --> 00:11:00,618 Diego? 260 00:11:04,122 --> 00:11:08,084 [laughing] 261 00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:12,172 Diego? 262 00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:16,468 Oh, I see. 263 00:11:16,468 --> 00:11:18,136 Mm. Pizza. 264 00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:19,888 [grunts, laughs] 265 00:11:19,888 --> 00:11:22,682 I walk into the master bedroom. 266 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,517 Diego? 267 00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:25,602 Were they, like... 268 00:11:25,602 --> 00:11:27,270 Hey. 269 00:11:27,270 --> 00:11:30,398 I don't even wanna tell you, but he's like, come here. 270 00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:33,568 What did you say? 271 00:11:33,568 --> 00:11:35,528 I'm good. 272 00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:38,281 I'm gonna be in the living room. 273 00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:41,951 Call them out on their bullshit. 274 00:11:41,951 --> 00:11:43,161 Yeah, okay. You're right. 275 00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:45,955 Did you say, hey, don't fuck the guys I bring home? 276 00:11:45,955 --> 00:11:47,165 Yeah. 277 00:11:47,165 --> 00:11:49,501 So what did you say? 278 00:11:49,501 --> 00:11:50,710 Pizza, pizza. 279 00:11:52,170 --> 00:11:54,589 No. No. 280 00:11:56,508 --> 00:11:59,260 Look, I feel like some of you think 281 00:11:59,260 --> 00:12:01,513 that because we share a space 282 00:12:01,513 --> 00:12:05,350 that maybe I'm down to share everything. 283 00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:07,936 And I guess normally that's true. 284 00:12:07,936 --> 00:12:11,231 It's just that I-- I don't know. 285 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:16,027 It hurts my feelings to feel so invisible among you sometimes. 286 00:12:16,027 --> 00:12:18,113 And I don't want the vibe to be toxic. 287 00:12:18,113 --> 00:12:21,324 And, you know, I don't want you guys to feel like 288 00:12:21,324 --> 00:12:22,659 it isn't your safe space, 289 00:12:22,659 --> 00:12:24,160 because it's also my safe space, 290 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:29,249 and I wanna be able to share, but I can't share everything. 291 00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:31,751 I don't know. I hope that makes sense. 292 00:12:33,503 --> 00:12:35,755 Are we good? 293 00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,382 Babe. 294 00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:41,052 Wait, did you guys get tickets? 295 00:12:41,052 --> 00:12:42,262 Can I still get some? 296 00:12:43,972 --> 00:12:45,640 Oh, Jesus. 297 00:12:46,725 --> 00:12:48,393 Hey. 298 00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,061 Hey, man. 299 00:12:50,061 --> 00:12:51,563 Hey. 300 00:12:51,563 --> 00:12:54,065 Yeah, I know. Let's take a cab. 301 00:12:54,065 --> 00:12:56,317 Come on. - Bye, Diego. 302 00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:01,698 Next up, Gina and Bibo. 303 00:13:01,698 --> 00:13:04,075 And you'll do a scene from "Marriage Story." 304 00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:05,910 "Marriage Story," yes. 305 00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:10,957 Could I get a minute? - Yeah, take your time. 306 00:13:12,917 --> 00:13:13,960 Okay. 307 00:13:16,588 --> 00:13:18,590 Your hair is fine, Gina. 308 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:22,802 [sighs] 309 00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:28,475 You always hated me. 310 00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:30,477 That's not true, dot, dot, dot. 311 00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:32,020 That was never true, dot. 312 00:13:32,020 --> 00:13:34,481 What are you talking about, question mark. 313 00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:36,858 You are my wife, dot. 314 00:13:36,858 --> 00:13:38,234 Okay, let's stop. 315 00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:41,071 I'm sorry, did you have a note? 316 00:13:41,071 --> 00:13:42,280 Um. 317 00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:44,157 What's the feedback? 318 00:13:45,784 --> 00:13:47,786 I just see robot. 319 00:13:47,786 --> 00:13:52,749 I see a robot pretending to love this woman. 320 00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:56,127 And because you are giving nothing but robot, 321 00:13:56,127 --> 00:13:59,005 you are forcing her to overact. 322 00:14:01,383 --> 00:14:03,259 Is everything okay? 323 00:14:03,259 --> 00:14:05,303 [whirring] 324 00:14:05,303 --> 00:14:07,555 - See you later, Bibo. - Bibo. 325 00:14:07,555 --> 00:14:09,724 Bibo. 326 00:14:09,724 --> 00:14:10,809 Do you know about the dress? 327 00:14:10,809 --> 00:14:13,728 The 2017 viral image featuring a dress 328 00:14:13,728 --> 00:14:15,105 that was blue and black to some, 329 00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:17,232 white and gold to others. - Yes. 330 00:14:17,232 --> 00:14:21,069 The dress isn't one thing and then another thing. 331 00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,863 The dress can be more than one thing at once. 332 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:28,993 You can be a robot and an actor. 333 00:14:28,993 --> 00:14:35,125 Maybe just use your robotness to be... 334 00:14:35,125 --> 00:14:36,668 an actor. 335 00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:40,922 It's grown. It's definitely grown. 336 00:14:40,922 --> 00:14:43,133 I bet WebMD is gonna be really comforting. 337 00:14:43,133 --> 00:14:46,136 [ominous music] 338 00:14:46,136 --> 00:14:47,679 ♪ ♪ 339 00:14:47,679 --> 00:14:50,098 Oh, what is this? 340 00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,187 Oh, good, good, good, good, good. 341 00:14:56,187 --> 00:14:58,189 I bet I'm gonna have this online doctor's 342 00:14:58,189 --> 00:14:59,649 undivided attention. 343 00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:02,861 [camera shutter clicks] 344 00:15:02,861 --> 00:15:09,951 ♪ ♪ 345 00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:16,499 [phone chimes] 346 00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:18,877 [groans] What is it? 347 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:22,797 Fuck. 348 00:15:22,797 --> 00:15:27,594 ♪ ♪ 349 00:15:27,594 --> 00:15:31,931 Um, it looks fine. 350 00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,850 Hey, lady, you can't be doing that here. 351 00:15:33,850 --> 00:15:36,269 Get up. Come on. 352 00:15:36,269 --> 00:15:38,063 - Gotta get up. - No. 353 00:15:39,230 --> 00:15:41,274 [sighs] Fuck. 354 00:15:41,274 --> 00:15:44,361 I pressed the wrong thing. 355 00:15:44,361 --> 00:15:46,529 Whatever. It's just a biopsy. 356 00:15:46,529 --> 00:15:53,620 ♪ ♪ 357 00:16:04,255 --> 00:16:06,508 Oh, Jesus, a scalpel. Okay, it's gonna hurt. 358 00:16:06,508 --> 00:16:08,426 Please, I'm working on getting an exception for Proof, 359 00:16:08,426 --> 00:16:09,761 but I don't know that I have a lot of time. 360 00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:11,846 My doctor's actually worried, and he ordered a biopsy. 361 00:16:11,846 --> 00:16:13,932 Well, not the doctor, but the person on the app 362 00:16:13,932 --> 00:16:16,893 who I think are technically doctors, and I, um-- 363 00:16:16,893 --> 00:16:19,896 [soft wondrous music playing] 364 00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:22,315 ♪ ♪ 365 00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:23,441 What's that sound? 366 00:16:23,441 --> 00:16:30,407 ♪ ♪ 367 00:16:30,407 --> 00:16:31,991 What's this? 368 00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:34,035 This shipwreck on a reef encrusted with little oysters? 369 00:16:34,035 --> 00:16:37,414 [soft chimes] 370 00:16:37,414 --> 00:16:40,125 It's missing an oyster. 371 00:16:40,125 --> 00:16:42,585 Yeah, it's an old family heirloom. 372 00:16:42,585 --> 00:16:46,172 Priceless, but worthless without that missing piece. 373 00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:52,595 I think I know where it is. 374 00:16:52,595 --> 00:16:56,141 If I bring it to you, do you think you could upload me? 375 00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:02,313 We could pay off Dad's bills with that money. 376 00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,776 - All of them? - Yeah. 377 00:17:06,776 --> 00:17:13,825 ♪ ♪ 378 00:17:13,825 --> 00:17:15,577 Fine. 379 00:17:15,577 --> 00:17:18,121 You bring the oyster, you don't need the Proof. 380 00:17:18,121 --> 00:17:20,957 Great. How hard can it be? 381 00:17:20,957 --> 00:17:26,171 To find a tiny mini... 382 00:17:29,841 --> 00:17:32,802 [tense music] 383 00:17:32,802 --> 00:17:36,765 ♪ ♪ 384 00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:40,602 Tabitha, those books are forbidden. 385 00:17:40,602 --> 00:17:42,896 - Hey, slut. - Not this green wig. 386 00:17:42,896 --> 00:17:44,356 It's not a wig. It's natural. 387 00:17:44,356 --> 00:17:46,941 I'm dead. You're an icon and I love you. 388 00:17:46,941 --> 00:17:47,942 Mwah, mwah. 389 00:17:47,942 --> 00:17:49,486 Meet my friends. Meet my friends. 390 00:17:49,486 --> 00:17:51,696 It's Tyler, Ryan, Ryan, and Jason. 391 00:17:51,696 --> 00:17:52,781 Do you want a drink, babe? 392 00:17:52,781 --> 00:17:54,866 Yeah. You know what I like. 393 00:17:54,866 --> 00:17:56,701 Okey dokey. 394 00:17:56,701 --> 00:18:00,121 [upbeat music playing] 395 00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:02,290 Unlock the power of natural... 396 00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:04,668 Ugh, someone made a fake profile of me again. 397 00:18:04,668 --> 00:18:06,711 Well, that's how you know that you've made it. 398 00:18:06,711 --> 00:18:08,213 That happens to me all the time. 399 00:18:08,213 --> 00:18:11,216 Oh, are you, like, an actor or something? 400 00:18:11,216 --> 00:18:13,385 I'm like an actor, yeah. 401 00:18:13,385 --> 00:18:15,178 Yeah, Trish is a whole thing. 402 00:18:15,178 --> 00:18:16,346 What have you been in? 403 00:18:16,346 --> 00:18:18,473 "That Time We Were There" on Amazon, 404 00:18:18,473 --> 00:18:20,058 "Summer's Only Once a Year" on Netflix, 405 00:18:20,058 --> 00:18:22,060 "The Tooth Fairy" remake on Zappos. 406 00:18:22,060 --> 00:18:24,771 Lots of stuff. - I'll have to check it out. 407 00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:26,606 [phone chimes] 408 00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:28,233 Hi, Emily. Luis here. 409 00:18:28,233 --> 00:18:29,693 Here's the fan art you commissioned. 410 00:18:29,693 --> 00:18:33,196 Always available if you want more. 411 00:18:33,196 --> 00:18:34,531 Thanks, Luis. 412 00:18:34,531 --> 00:18:38,159 Kindly, Emily, manager and publicist for Trish. 413 00:18:38,159 --> 00:18:41,162 [mysterious music] 414 00:18:41,162 --> 00:18:42,664 ♪ ♪ 415 00:18:42,664 --> 00:18:44,290 Trish's number one fan here. 416 00:18:44,290 --> 00:18:46,626 Check out this piece I made in honor of my muse. 417 00:18:48,211 --> 00:18:51,506 And I admire that because it's a lifestyle. 418 00:18:54,426 --> 00:18:55,510 Wow. 419 00:18:55,510 --> 00:18:57,429 Always so surprised and honored by my fans. 420 00:18:57,429 --> 00:18:58,930 My life is so crazy. 421 00:18:58,930 --> 00:19:01,516 I can't believe I inspire real fans unprompted 422 00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:03,184 to make fan art of me. 423 00:19:04,686 --> 00:19:07,188 Oh, my God, Trish, the thing you just reposted. 424 00:19:07,188 --> 00:19:08,606 Let me see. 425 00:19:08,606 --> 00:19:11,609 "The Glenda we all deserve." 426 00:19:11,609 --> 00:19:13,778 Shots fired. 427 00:19:13,778 --> 00:19:16,114 - Who made that? - @TrishFanboy. 428 00:19:16,114 --> 00:19:18,533 Trish is so famous, she has fan accounts. 429 00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:23,455 Well, diamonds are a girl's best friend. 430 00:19:23,455 --> 00:19:25,373 Yeah, if they're real. [laughter] 431 00:19:25,373 --> 00:19:27,500 She's so stupid. 432 00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:29,294 Yeah, she's stupid. 433 00:19:31,129 --> 00:19:32,672 Ugh, I wanna go there. 434 00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:34,341 That's my dream place. 435 00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:36,009 I've been there. 436 00:19:37,594 --> 00:19:39,429 - Gay icon. - Gagging for my queen. 437 00:19:39,429 --> 00:19:40,764 Slay. 438 00:19:40,764 --> 00:19:42,307 Oh, my God, Trish is so iconic. 439 00:19:42,307 --> 00:19:44,184 Honey, the queen has arrived. 440 00:19:44,184 --> 00:19:46,102 Hey, @TrishFanboy, this is Luis. 441 00:19:46,102 --> 00:19:47,562 I was commissioned by Trish's team 442 00:19:47,562 --> 00:19:49,189 to make this art for a charity. 443 00:19:49,189 --> 00:19:51,399 Please tag me whenever you repost. 444 00:19:51,399 --> 00:19:52,734 Thanks. 445 00:19:52,734 --> 00:19:59,824 ♪ ♪ 446 00:20:00,909 --> 00:20:02,577 Hi, Luis, Emily again. 447 00:20:02,577 --> 00:20:04,412 You are not allowed to promote your services 448 00:20:04,412 --> 00:20:05,830 using the work we commissioned from you. 449 00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:07,332 Those were for charity. 450 00:20:07,332 --> 00:20:09,125 Unfortunately, we will not be able 451 00:20:09,125 --> 00:20:10,835 to compensate you for this piece. 452 00:20:10,835 --> 00:20:12,587 I can't think about this right now. 453 00:20:12,587 --> 00:20:14,839 I've got a lunch tomorrow with some of the city's 454 00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:16,675 biggest movers and shakers. 455 00:20:16,675 --> 00:20:18,093 Last night I was thinking-- 456 00:20:18,093 --> 00:20:19,511 What charity? 457 00:20:19,511 --> 00:20:22,180 They're only posted by some random fan account. 458 00:20:22,180 --> 00:20:27,852 Wait, is she the fan account? 459 00:20:27,852 --> 00:20:29,896 To eavesdrop on personal, private conversation 460 00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:32,273 between friends. 461 00:20:32,273 --> 00:20:34,984 Wait, so she paid for her own fan art? 462 00:20:34,984 --> 00:20:37,696 [tense music] 463 00:20:37,696 --> 00:20:40,657 Yeah, and I have receipts. 464 00:20:40,657 --> 00:20:45,537 ♪ ♪ 465 00:20:45,537 --> 00:20:48,623 [laughter] 466 00:20:57,382 --> 00:20:58,299 Bitch. 467 00:20:58,299 --> 00:20:59,551 [laughter] 468 00:20:59,551 --> 00:21:01,052 Oh, my God. 469 00:21:01,052 --> 00:21:02,387 OMG, Trish, you missed it. 470 00:21:02,387 --> 00:21:03,722 Rewind for Trish. 471 00:21:03,722 --> 00:21:05,056 Hey, rewind it. 472 00:21:05,056 --> 00:21:06,766 Derrick, it's live. 473 00:21:11,146 --> 00:21:12,230 [phone chimes] 474 00:21:12,230 --> 00:21:13,857 You can keep blocking me, 475 00:21:13,857 --> 00:21:15,734 but I'll just keep making new accounts. 476 00:21:15,734 --> 00:21:17,235 [laughs] 477 00:21:17,235 --> 00:21:18,486 Have you guys ever had an online stalker? 478 00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:20,405 Is someone stalking you? 479 00:21:20,405 --> 00:21:22,574 Oh, no, not me. I'm helping a friend out. 480 00:21:22,574 --> 00:21:24,075 He has this, like, crazy guy that 481 00:21:24,075 --> 00:21:25,201 keeps making fake accounts. 482 00:21:25,201 --> 00:21:26,995 Some homophobic psycho. 483 00:21:26,995 --> 00:21:28,913 That's so nice of you to help him out. 484 00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:31,166 I mean, he could just make his account private. 485 00:21:31,166 --> 00:21:32,917 No, he wants to be seen. 486 00:21:32,917 --> 00:21:35,503 How do you get them to stop making new accounts? 487 00:21:35,503 --> 00:21:37,422 I don't think you can. 488 00:21:37,422 --> 00:21:39,174 It's so toxic. 489 00:21:41,092 --> 00:21:43,261 Wait, is she blocking people now? 490 00:21:43,261 --> 00:21:45,180 Hey, Luis, DM me. 491 00:21:45,180 --> 00:21:47,807 I knew it. This girl isn't even famous. 492 00:21:47,807 --> 00:21:49,142 Is she serious? 493 00:21:49,142 --> 00:21:50,268 This is actually-- 494 00:21:50,268 --> 00:21:53,146 [overlapping voices] 495 00:21:53,146 --> 00:21:55,106 Hey, Derrick, can I talk to you for a second? 496 00:21:55,106 --> 00:21:57,901 Sure. 497 00:21:57,901 --> 00:21:59,194 BRB. 498 00:21:59,194 --> 00:22:01,071 Let me know what happens. 499 00:22:01,071 --> 00:22:02,530 You okay? What's up? 500 00:22:02,530 --> 00:22:04,574 I need you to help me block someone, like, permanently. 501 00:22:04,574 --> 00:22:05,909 This is for your friend? 502 00:22:05,909 --> 00:22:07,118 Yeah, I need you to ask Jeremy. 503 00:22:07,118 --> 00:22:09,037 - Jeremy? - Your fucking boyfriend? 504 00:22:09,037 --> 00:22:10,789 He works at Facebook now. - Uh-huh. 505 00:22:10,789 --> 00:22:13,083 I need him to block them. They keep making accounts. 506 00:22:13,083 --> 00:22:14,292 I need to block them from, like, 507 00:22:14,292 --> 00:22:15,377 their IP address or something. I don't fucking know. 508 00:22:15,377 --> 00:22:17,128 What is this about? 509 00:22:17,128 --> 00:22:19,297 - I'm this. - Uh-huh. 510 00:22:19,297 --> 00:22:21,216 No, listen, I'm the fan account. 511 00:22:21,216 --> 00:22:22,801 - You drew this? - No. 512 00:22:22,801 --> 00:22:24,260 My manager commissioned it. - Why? 513 00:22:24,260 --> 00:22:25,553 She fucked up. 514 00:22:25,553 --> 00:22:26,721 She found this guy on I don't know where 515 00:22:26,721 --> 00:22:28,556 to make a fan art of me for the fan account. 516 00:22:28,556 --> 00:22:31,476 So this fan account is run by you? 517 00:22:31,476 --> 00:22:33,478 Everyone does it. Everyone does. 518 00:22:33,478 --> 00:22:36,022 I'm iconic. Look at me. I'm a whole thing. 519 00:22:36,022 --> 00:22:37,357 But this is not a real fan. 520 00:22:37,357 --> 00:22:38,566 But the art inspires a lot of people. 521 00:22:38,566 --> 00:22:40,110 To make art of you? 522 00:22:40,110 --> 00:22:41,945 Yes, but now the artist is telling people. 523 00:22:41,945 --> 00:22:43,238 Now people know. 524 00:22:43,238 --> 00:22:44,364 But not if we permanently block him. 525 00:22:44,364 --> 00:22:45,615 - Who made this? - Some kid. 526 00:22:45,615 --> 00:22:46,700 I don't know. Emily found him. 527 00:22:46,700 --> 00:22:48,993 - Emily? - My fucking manager. 528 00:22:48,993 --> 00:22:50,370 She keeps doing this. 529 00:22:50,370 --> 00:22:51,830 She's obsessed. 530 00:22:51,830 --> 00:22:53,164 She wants to "Single White Female" me. 531 00:22:53,164 --> 00:22:54,374 Emily what? 532 00:22:54,374 --> 00:22:56,334 What if all the gays turn on me? 533 00:22:56,334 --> 00:22:57,877 - Emily what? - What? 534 00:22:57,877 --> 00:22:59,921 What is your manager's last name? 535 00:23:01,673 --> 00:23:05,010 Oh. Trish. 536 00:23:05,010 --> 00:23:07,679 And the Red Nose Day issue? 537 00:23:07,679 --> 00:23:10,682 The GoFundMe for that kid? [laughs] 538 00:23:10,682 --> 00:23:12,976 I knew it. I fucking knew it. 539 00:23:12,976 --> 00:23:15,353 No one is posting fake photos of you. 540 00:23:15,353 --> 00:23:17,105 No one's catfishing as you. 541 00:23:17,105 --> 00:23:19,149 Baby, are you on crack? 542 00:23:19,149 --> 00:23:22,193 What is wrong with you? You're not famous. 543 00:23:22,193 --> 00:23:24,112 You're paying people to make fan art of you. 544 00:23:24,112 --> 00:23:26,865 I'm dead. I'm literally freaking dead. 545 00:23:30,702 --> 00:23:33,997 [eerie music] 546 00:23:33,997 --> 00:23:40,211 ♪ ♪ 547 00:23:42,547 --> 00:23:43,798 I'm iconic. 548 00:23:45,425 --> 00:23:47,510 I'm--I'm iconic. 549 00:23:47,510 --> 00:23:49,763 Iconic. 550 00:23:49,763 --> 00:23:51,765 Everyone's obsessed with me. 551 00:23:51,765 --> 00:23:54,976 Everyone's obsessed because I'm iconic. 552 00:23:57,896 --> 00:23:59,105 Thanks. 553 00:24:02,776 --> 00:24:07,697 The next L train will arrive in 248 minutes. 554 00:24:07,697 --> 00:24:10,241 Hey, I'm worried about Derrick's drinking. 555 00:24:10,241 --> 00:24:12,410 He was really sloppy when I left. 556 00:24:12,410 --> 00:24:13,828 He could have really hurt himself. 557 00:24:13,828 --> 00:24:17,582 [whirring] 558 00:24:17,582 --> 00:24:20,585 [mysterious music] 559 00:24:20,585 --> 00:24:25,882 ♪ ♪ 560 00:24:28,802 --> 00:24:33,014 Martine. 561 00:24:33,014 --> 00:24:35,517 Martine! 562 00:24:35,517 --> 00:24:38,311 [chuckles] Oh, my God. 563 00:24:38,311 --> 00:24:40,021 God, you didn't hear me? 564 00:24:40,021 --> 00:24:42,107 I was just calling your name, like, three times. 565 00:24:42,107 --> 00:24:43,900 What--gosh. Oh. 566 00:24:43,900 --> 00:24:45,902 Are you still in performance? 567 00:24:45,902 --> 00:24:48,655 What was it? Um... Vanessa, right? 568 00:24:48,655 --> 00:24:53,201 Vanesja with a J. Like the hotels. 569 00:24:53,201 --> 00:24:55,495 Sure. Right. Gosh. 570 00:24:55,495 --> 00:24:57,706 You took my course years ago. 571 00:24:57,706 --> 00:24:59,833 You know, I was so riveted when I heard 572 00:24:59,833 --> 00:25:03,461 you were so committed to your thesis. 573 00:25:03,461 --> 00:25:06,131 But some people are like, oh, yeah, no, I don't think 574 00:25:06,131 --> 00:25:07,757 she's in performance anymore. 575 00:25:07,757 --> 00:25:10,301 I think she's genuinely an agent. 576 00:25:10,301 --> 00:25:12,887 But that's not true, is it? 577 00:25:15,557 --> 00:25:17,767 Huh. 578 00:25:17,767 --> 00:25:20,437 You're not prolonging your performance piece 579 00:25:20,437 --> 00:25:23,148 'cause you're scared of graduating with an arts degree 580 00:25:23,148 --> 00:25:25,900 and not having money or insurance 581 00:25:25,900 --> 00:25:29,446 or qualifying for Proof of Existence, right? 582 00:25:29,446 --> 00:25:31,614 I mean, you're not having your cake 583 00:25:31,614 --> 00:25:33,575 and eating it too, are you? 584 00:25:36,161 --> 00:25:37,829 - I have to go. - Sure. 585 00:25:37,829 --> 00:25:42,542 Yeah, I have a very important cli--client. 586 00:25:42,542 --> 00:25:44,544 - Client. - Waiting. 587 00:25:44,544 --> 00:25:45,628 Sure. 588 00:25:45,628 --> 00:25:48,256 [claps] Very nice. 589 00:25:48,256 --> 00:25:51,259 You know, Vanesja, like the hotels, 590 00:25:51,259 --> 00:25:53,053 the job of the artist is to make people 591 00:25:53,053 --> 00:25:54,929 see things in a different way. 592 00:25:54,929 --> 00:25:58,808 How does this performance change anything? 593 00:25:58,808 --> 00:26:01,519 Just something for you to go home and munch on. 594 00:26:01,519 --> 00:26:02,937 All right? 595 00:26:02,937 --> 00:26:04,105 I'm not gonna wait for the bus anymore. 596 00:26:04,105 --> 00:26:06,316 I think I'm gonna walk. 597 00:26:06,316 --> 00:26:09,110 You can't even walk in those shoes, can you? 598 00:26:09,110 --> 00:26:12,947 You're weak. You're weak. 599 00:26:12,947 --> 00:26:14,366 Excuse me. 600 00:26:14,366 --> 00:26:17,035 [soft pensive music] 601 00:26:17,035 --> 00:26:19,621 I should help. 602 00:26:19,621 --> 00:26:21,456 Why else am I an artist 603 00:26:21,456 --> 00:26:24,542 if not to make the world a better place? 604 00:26:24,542 --> 00:26:31,633 ♪ ♪ 605 00:26:40,558 --> 00:26:41,643 Hey, babe? 606 00:26:41,643 --> 00:26:43,269 Hey. Hi. 607 00:26:43,269 --> 00:26:46,272 Sorry, I'm--I'm sort of in the middle of something. 608 00:26:46,272 --> 00:26:48,525 I--I finally got a biopsy, 609 00:26:48,525 --> 00:26:52,779 and the, uh, the--the doctor seems kind of worried. 610 00:26:52,779 --> 00:26:55,782 Aw, listen, I think we're gonna have to find 611 00:26:55,782 --> 00:26:58,868 another way to get you an exception. 612 00:26:58,868 --> 00:27:00,412 Wait, why? 613 00:27:00,412 --> 00:27:04,874 Well, it's just, you look amazing in the photo, 614 00:27:04,874 --> 00:27:08,211 but, um... 615 00:27:08,211 --> 00:27:10,547 it's just not your face. 616 00:27:10,547 --> 00:27:13,258 So I think our only option now is to pitch Zappos 617 00:27:13,258 --> 00:27:14,718 that idea of yours. 618 00:27:14,718 --> 00:27:16,720 You know, the how I-- 619 00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:18,263 [laughs] No, no. There is no way. 620 00:27:18,263 --> 00:27:21,099 I will not be selling out. Thank you. 621 00:27:22,517 --> 00:27:23,768 Hello. 622 00:27:23,768 --> 00:27:24,936 I hear you have an idea for a show for us. 623 00:27:24,936 --> 00:27:26,521 I do, and I am very excited 624 00:27:26,521 --> 00:27:27,689 to be sharing it with you today. 625 00:27:27,689 --> 00:27:29,858 Okay, so remakes are very in right now, right? 626 00:27:29,858 --> 00:27:31,776 Right, right, right. Okay, give it to me. 627 00:27:31,776 --> 00:27:33,570 Feed me. Feed Susana. 628 00:27:33,570 --> 00:27:37,365 Okay, so how about a remake of "The Lion King"? 629 00:27:37,365 --> 00:27:41,578 Uh, this remake stars a zebra, just, like, a random zebra 630 00:27:41,578 --> 00:27:42,787 that otherwise would be considered 631 00:27:42,787 --> 00:27:44,539 an extra in the movie. 632 00:27:44,539 --> 00:27:46,916 But this zebra is like, wait, why are lions our leaders? 633 00:27:46,916 --> 00:27:48,793 Who elected them the leaders? 634 00:27:48,793 --> 00:27:52,005 Why do we have to bow down to them and get eaten by them? 635 00:27:52,005 --> 00:27:54,549 So then the zebra leads the revolution, 636 00:27:54,549 --> 00:27:56,968 but then the zebra does end up getting eaten. 637 00:27:56,968 --> 00:28:00,930 But as the zebra lays dying, looking up into the heavens 638 00:28:00,930 --> 00:28:03,558 with, like, maybe, like, the sun reflected on his eye 639 00:28:03,558 --> 00:28:07,354 and thinking, well, you know, at least I tried. 640 00:28:07,354 --> 00:28:08,897 Ugh! Cut the bullshit. 641 00:28:09,939 --> 00:28:12,025 - Hmm? - Huh? 642 00:28:12,025 --> 00:28:14,736 Cut the bullshit. 643 00:28:14,736 --> 00:28:16,654 You know what we want, and we know what you want. 644 00:28:16,654 --> 00:28:18,990 You need a little piece of paper that says you don't need 645 00:28:18,990 --> 00:28:20,742 another little piece of paper. 646 00:28:20,742 --> 00:28:22,160 If you don't sell a show, 647 00:28:22,160 --> 00:28:24,454 you don't get exception from Proof of Existence, 648 00:28:24,454 --> 00:28:26,831 and you don't get to upload yourself. 649 00:28:26,831 --> 00:28:27,832 That's right. 650 00:28:27,832 --> 00:28:29,834 I got your medical records. 651 00:28:29,834 --> 00:28:33,505 Zappos level intel. 652 00:28:33,505 --> 00:28:36,341 I know you're expecting bad news, and selling a show 653 00:28:36,341 --> 00:28:38,176 is the only way to become incorporeal, 654 00:28:38,176 --> 00:28:40,595 given that your little oyster is at the bottom of the sea. 655 00:28:40,595 --> 00:28:44,641 So let's quit playing games, huh? 656 00:28:44,641 --> 00:28:46,893 Grow up. Give us what we want. 657 00:28:46,893 --> 00:28:48,353 Give us your trauma. 658 00:28:48,353 --> 00:28:49,896 Give it to us funny. 659 00:28:49,896 --> 00:28:54,234 Give it to us en espanol, por favor. 660 00:28:54,234 --> 00:28:58,613 Okay, well, I do have an idea in case of emergency. 661 00:28:58,613 --> 00:29:00,073 Mm-hmm. Yes? 662 00:29:00,073 --> 00:29:02,659 I was hoping I would never have to use. 663 00:29:02,659 --> 00:29:04,953 Mm-hmm. Say it. 664 00:29:04,953 --> 00:29:06,162 [tense music] 665 00:29:06,162 --> 00:29:08,748 It's a script titled... 666 00:29:08,748 --> 00:29:09,874 Well, say it. 667 00:29:19,134 --> 00:29:22,220 [laughs] 668 00:29:22,220 --> 00:29:23,722 That's a show. 669 00:29:23,722 --> 00:29:26,850 [laughing] 670 00:29:28,309 --> 00:29:29,394 Okay. 671 00:29:31,563 --> 00:29:34,524 [mysterious music] 672 00:29:34,524 --> 00:29:41,614 ♪ ♪ 673 00:31:01,653 --> 00:31:04,030 [bright tone]