1
00:00:07,924 --> 00:00:09,801
No one will biopsy my mole,
2
00:00:09,801 --> 00:00:11,636
so I need to upload myself
so I don't die,
3
00:00:11,636 --> 00:00:13,722
but even they require
Proof of Existence,
4
00:00:13,722 --> 00:00:15,473
which I don't want to get,
5
00:00:15,473 --> 00:00:18,143
so instead, I have to become
an exception by being famous.
6
00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:19,519
- Hello?
- Hi.
7
00:00:19,519 --> 00:00:21,021
Hey, how are you?
8
00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:22,939
Okay, so I have an idea
9
00:00:22,939 --> 00:00:24,441
that I'm sure
will make me an exception.
10
00:00:24,441 --> 00:00:25,442
Do you wanna hear it?
11
00:00:25,442 --> 00:00:27,277
- I'm in a meeting.
- Okay.
12
00:00:27,277 --> 00:00:30,530
A couple of years ago,
during a really harsh winter,
13
00:00:30,530 --> 00:00:32,532
a dolphin got stuck
in a canal in South Brooklyn.
14
00:00:32,532 --> 00:00:33,867
Uh-huh.
15
00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:35,785
It got trapped
and everyone could see it.
16
00:00:35,785 --> 00:00:37,912
But the environmental laws
meant to protect it
17
00:00:37,912 --> 00:00:40,415
stated that no one could help
it without the proper permit.
18
00:00:40,415 --> 00:00:42,917
Long story short,
it ended up dying.
19
00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:46,004
And, well, I guess
that's where this fun
20
00:00:46,004 --> 00:00:47,964
family movie would end.
21
00:00:49,382 --> 00:00:50,383
What do you think?
22
00:00:50,383 --> 00:00:52,093
Hello? Hello?
23
00:00:52,093 --> 00:00:53,595
Hello, are you there?
Do you like it?
24
00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:55,013
What do you think?
25
00:00:55,013 --> 00:00:58,767
What about something
about your story?
26
00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:00,894
That's my story
through metaphor.
27
00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:02,979
No, babe, no metaphors.
28
00:01:02,979 --> 00:01:05,982
Just big, sad speeches.
29
00:01:05,982 --> 00:01:09,277
Call it... Gaytino.
30
00:01:09,277 --> 00:01:11,571
Vanesja, Gaytinx.
31
00:01:11,571 --> 00:01:14,324
Listen,
do the credit card commercial,
32
00:01:14,324 --> 00:01:18,953
get what you need out of it,
and move on.
33
00:01:18,953 --> 00:01:20,872
Okay.
34
00:01:20,872 --> 00:01:22,665
Okay, yeah.
35
00:01:22,665 --> 00:01:23,667
Okay.
36
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:26,127
Roll playback on beach.
37
00:01:29,589 --> 00:01:31,925
And action.
38
00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:34,135
Julio. Hi.
39
00:01:34,135 --> 00:01:37,889
So imagine you're
on the beach and you're happy.
40
00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:44,854
On the beach and you're happy.
41
00:01:44,854 --> 00:01:46,564
Jesus.
42
00:01:46,564 --> 00:01:48,316
His mouth is so tense.
43
00:01:48,316 --> 00:01:50,944
And it's like, you know,
I don't get it.
44
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:52,487
Does he not love credit cards?
45
00:01:52,487 --> 00:01:53,738
It's a safe and convenient way
to earn miles.
46
00:01:53,738 --> 00:01:56,282
I mean, that's the brief.
It's not--okay.
47
00:01:58,076 --> 00:02:01,287
Julio, can we get a smile?
48
00:02:01,287 --> 00:02:02,372
Uh, yeah.
49
00:02:06,501 --> 00:02:07,627
Okay.
50
00:02:07,627 --> 00:02:09,587
Less teeth. Like, uh...
51
00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:14,092
Okay, can you bring
in the green tape?
52
00:02:14,092 --> 00:02:15,385
Amazing. Thank you.
53
00:02:15,385 --> 00:02:18,096
Hi again. Um, do you--
54
00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:19,180
Perfect.
55
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:24,686
Yes. That. No, it's like, joy.
56
00:02:26,021 --> 00:02:29,399
Julio, your eyes
are so, so fantastic
57
00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:31,192
and energized and expressive.
58
00:02:31,192 --> 00:02:33,111
You know, we just wanna
green screen something
59
00:02:33,111 --> 00:02:34,446
that'll match that energy.
60
00:02:36,364 --> 00:02:38,241
From the top.
61
00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:42,871
You are on the beach
and you are very happy.
62
00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:44,372
Hold it a little higher.
63
00:02:44,372 --> 00:02:46,583
Yes, great.
64
00:02:46,583 --> 00:02:48,335
Like you're almost surprised.
65
00:02:48,335 --> 00:02:49,544
Like money.
66
00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:50,754
Stunning.
67
00:02:50,754 --> 00:02:51,755
Great.
68
00:02:51,755 --> 00:02:52,881
Incredible.
69
00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:07,312
Many kind regards for this check in.
70
00:03:07,312 --> 00:03:08,980
Yeah, hi, Pirulinpinpina.
71
00:03:08,980 --> 00:03:12,025
I--ooh, wasn't expecting you
to be slimy.
72
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:14,527
As manager of your socials,
it is very important
73
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:17,072
communications goes
backwards and forwards.
74
00:03:17,072 --> 00:03:19,657
Okay, I wanted to talk
to you about this post
75
00:03:19,657 --> 00:03:20,617
that you made on my behalf.
76
00:03:20,617 --> 00:03:22,619
To grow followers and increase wealth!
77
00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:24,162
Sure.
78
00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:25,997
It's a picture of me sleeping
and it says,
79
00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:28,500
"Let's get this mondais right."
80
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,418
It was posted Wednesday
at 3:00 a.m.
81
00:03:30,418 --> 00:03:34,214
OK! Apologies for incident!
Can-do quick fix!
82
00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:35,799
Okay, I guess I just
don't understand
83
00:03:35,799 --> 00:03:38,468
what the point
of that picture is.
84
00:03:38,468 --> 00:03:39,761
Did you just post this?
85
00:03:39,761 --> 00:03:42,972
Yes, all correct this time.
Pirulinpinpina!
86
00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:45,350
"Many apologies
for earlier mispost.
87
00:03:45,350 --> 00:03:48,436
"A grave error on my part,
as eyes were closed.
88
00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:49,562
"Please forgive.
89
00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:50,980
"Let's get this Monday right.
90
00:03:50,980 --> 00:03:54,859
It's Friday,
eight twenty too pm."
91
00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:57,654
Pirulinpinpina, this doesn't
sound like me at all.
92
00:03:59,781 --> 00:04:01,408
Pirulinpinpina?
93
00:04:02,992 --> 00:04:04,577
Kindly do not use TONE at me.
94
00:04:04,577 --> 00:04:06,496
I'm not using tone with you.
95
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:07,539
Don't use tone with her.
96
00:04:07,539 --> 00:04:09,874
I wasn't.
I wasn't using tone.
97
00:04:09,874 --> 00:04:11,543
- Jesus.
- Is Lord.
98
00:04:11,543 --> 00:04:12,460
Amen!
99
00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:15,338
Vanesja, are you sure
this is gonna make me
100
00:04:15,338 --> 00:04:17,048
an exception to Proof?
101
00:04:17,048 --> 00:04:18,675
I'm not sure about this,
102
00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:23,138
but I have high hopes
for the commercial.
103
00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:24,222
Hold on.
104
00:04:24,222 --> 00:04:25,515
Another client needs me.
105
00:04:27,183 --> 00:04:30,228
Hello, my dark star.
106
00:04:30,228 --> 00:04:34,107
I have some big, bad news.
107
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:37,068
The poster for "Cunty Little
Rich Kids" came out.
108
00:04:37,068 --> 00:04:39,279
They went with the picture
you don't like,
109
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,407
and the airline
mishandled your luggage,
110
00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:46,661
so you'll have to wear
something of mine.
111
00:04:48,997 --> 00:04:50,999
Oh.
112
00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:52,042
Wow.
113
00:04:52,042 --> 00:04:53,376
Red suits you.
114
00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:55,211
Yeah, everything suits me.
115
00:04:55,211 --> 00:04:59,549
Dustin, what's going on
in that little head of yours?
116
00:04:59,549 --> 00:05:00,633
I don't know.
117
00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:09,768
Share.
118
00:05:11,895 --> 00:05:14,773
I just feel like
the world is so fucked up.
119
00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:18,777
I've been on this show
for, like, 15 fucking seasons
120
00:05:18,777 --> 00:05:21,863
and, yeah, I make
a shit-ton of money, right?
121
00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:27,035
And I've got a house
in Bali, PlayStation.
122
00:05:28,745 --> 00:05:30,121
It all kicks ass.
123
00:05:30,121 --> 00:05:32,165
But like, for what?
124
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:35,835
You want another PlayStation?
125
00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:39,631
Yeah, if we could get that
going, that'd be--no, no, no.
126
00:05:39,631 --> 00:05:41,299
Damn it.
127
00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:43,301
I took the subway yesterday.
128
00:05:43,301 --> 00:05:45,011
Dustin, why?
129
00:05:45,011 --> 00:05:46,554
'Cause I don't
wanna be in a car.
130
00:05:46,554 --> 00:05:48,348
I wanna be out in the world.
131
00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:51,309
I wanna be living
and experiencing.
132
00:05:51,309 --> 00:05:53,937
Anyway, the train was,
like, super delayed,
133
00:05:53,937 --> 00:05:56,106
and I started talking
to this homeless man.
134
00:05:56,106 --> 00:05:59,401
I said, hey, what's your name?
135
00:05:59,401 --> 00:06:01,111
I'm Dustin.
136
00:06:01,111 --> 00:06:02,946
And he said
he had to take a shit,
137
00:06:02,946 --> 00:06:05,782
and he said he couldn't,
and I asked him why.
138
00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:09,786
And he told me that
he'd have to exit the station
139
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:11,454
in order to do that.
140
00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:14,040
And re-entering, he'd have
to pay money, and he can't.
141
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,709
And, like, in that moment,
I like,
142
00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:20,463
went into my, like,
empathic trance.
143
00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:22,924
And so I was just
in his shoes...
144
00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:26,678
Seeing his perspective.
145
00:06:26,678 --> 00:06:30,598
It was like...
146
00:06:32,809 --> 00:06:36,896
You know. And, like, I saw it.
147
00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:39,441
I saw it
from his point of view.
148
00:06:39,441 --> 00:06:41,943
The world's not fucking fair.
149
00:06:41,943 --> 00:06:43,778
And that's just one dude.
150
00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:45,572
There's so many like him.
151
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:46,781
And what am I doing?
152
00:06:46,781 --> 00:06:48,199
I should help.
153
00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:53,038
'Cause why else--
why else am I an artist
154
00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:55,415
if not to make the world
a better place?
155
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,792
We can use this.
156
00:06:57,792 --> 00:07:01,880
We can do an interview
157
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,798
with "Teen Vogue."
158
00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:07,010
"Teen Vogue."
I'm fucking 39 years old!
159
00:07:07,010 --> 00:07:08,303
The fuck.
160
00:07:08,303 --> 00:07:10,889
Don't share that.
161
00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:12,640
You don't even get it.
162
00:07:15,477 --> 00:07:16,811
You're just a suit.
163
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:22,192
Big, corporate,
powerful suit lady.
164
00:07:22,192 --> 00:07:26,529
You don't care about
the problems of people.
165
00:07:29,824 --> 00:07:34,704
The next L train
will arrive in 178 minutes.
166
00:07:34,704 --> 00:07:36,915
Fuck my life.
167
00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:38,291
I hate New York.
168
00:07:39,918 --> 00:07:41,670
- Oh, my God.
- What?
169
00:07:41,670 --> 00:07:43,380
It's my roommate. Don't look.
170
00:07:43,380 --> 00:07:45,465
Oh, like,
one of the little ones?
171
00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:46,925
Yeah.
172
00:07:46,925 --> 00:07:48,051
Vibes bad?
173
00:07:48,051 --> 00:07:49,678
Oh, my God.
174
00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:51,054
I didn't tell you
what happened.
175
00:07:51,054 --> 00:07:52,722
Mm-mm.
176
00:07:52,722 --> 00:07:55,350
Okay, so at first,
177
00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:56,685
things were
pretty chill, right?
178
00:07:56,685 --> 00:07:57,769
Yeah.
179
00:08:01,022 --> 00:08:02,565
When she moved in,
she said she had some cousins
180
00:08:02,565 --> 00:08:03,608
that were gonna come.
181
00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:04,818
Not cousins.
182
00:08:04,818 --> 00:08:06,277
Nothing's ever good
when they bring cousins.
183
00:08:06,277 --> 00:08:08,071
- And could they stay with us?
- Ew.
184
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:10,407
They're really nice! You'll love them!
185
00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:12,784
And I was like,
yeah, okay, whatever.
186
00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:14,327
I mean, you're so tiny.
Who cares, right?
187
00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:15,537
Right.
188
00:08:15,537 --> 00:08:17,789
So they come,
and there's like nine of them.
189
00:08:17,789 --> 00:08:18,915
Again, no big deal.
190
00:08:18,915 --> 00:08:20,000
Right,
'cause they're so small.
191
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,876
Right.
And I don't know, I figured
192
00:08:21,876 --> 00:08:23,753
they're gonna go see
the Statue of Liberty,
193
00:08:23,753 --> 00:08:25,630
- be out and about, whatever.
- Sure.
194
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:28,133
But then one night
they're like, hey,
195
00:08:28,133 --> 00:08:29,551
what should we do tomorrow?
196
00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:31,678
And I'm like, have you
ever been to the Met?
197
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:32,595
And they're like...
198
00:08:32,595 --> 00:08:35,140
Kindly suggest something else.
That is against religion.
199
00:08:35,140 --> 00:08:36,182
Wait, what?
200
00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:37,475
I don't know, they're like,
201
00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:39,644
strangely Christian,
like, evangelist.
202
00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:40,770
I don't know, whatever.
203
00:08:40,770 --> 00:08:42,397
It's annoying,
but I figure they'll go soon.
204
00:08:42,397 --> 00:08:44,691
Oh, also,
they're obsessed with pizza?
205
00:08:44,691 --> 00:08:46,151
What, do they, like,
eat your pizza?
206
00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:47,485
Not like that, no.
207
00:08:47,485 --> 00:08:48,945
It's like I bring pizza home,
208
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:50,405
and they run out
with little cameras
209
00:08:50,405 --> 00:08:52,282
and take pictures
of the pizza.
210
00:08:52,282 --> 00:08:53,491
Pizza! Pizza!
211
00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:54,576
Oh my god, pizza!!
212
00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:55,493
Pizza! Yay pizza!!
213
00:08:55,493 --> 00:08:56,411
Take a picture! Pizza!
214
00:08:56,411 --> 00:08:57,704
That's horrifying.
215
00:08:57,704 --> 00:08:59,164
Anyway, later,
216
00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:02,375
Pirulinpinpina's like,
hey, can they move in?
217
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:03,793
- No.
- Yeah.
218
00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:05,211
She's so freaking tacky.
219
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:07,339
And I'm like, what? Right?
220
00:09:07,339 --> 00:09:08,423
And she's like...
221
00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:09,841
But your rent will go down!
222
00:09:09,841 --> 00:09:11,468
We take up no space!
223
00:09:11,468 --> 00:09:14,429
So I'm kind of like,
yeah, okay, whatever.
224
00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:19,351
But what I didn't know
is that they, uh, multiply.
225
00:09:19,351 --> 00:09:20,894
Do they, like, reproduce?
226
00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:22,520
It's not a sex thing.
227
00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:25,774
It's just like,
more of them arrive.
228
00:09:25,774 --> 00:09:27,525
So anyway, now there's,
like, 50 of them.
229
00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:28,985
- 50?
- Yeah.
230
00:09:28,985 --> 00:09:29,903
There's 50?
231
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:30,820
Faster! Faster!
232
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:31,738
Hoorayyyy!!!
233
00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:32,655
Weeeeeee!
234
00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:34,491
Take us into the living room!!
235
00:09:35,283 --> 00:09:37,327
And some of them are gay.
236
00:09:37,327 --> 00:09:38,912
Living for that.
237
00:09:38,912 --> 00:09:40,705
Yeah, it's, like,
impossible to get on Grindr
238
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:42,415
because the whole grid
is little ones.
239
00:09:42,415 --> 00:09:46,002
Anyway, one night I'm doing
my go-go shift at Metro.
240
00:09:51,383 --> 00:09:53,426
And I see
the cutie from the gym.
241
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:54,761
Ooh, the one
with the big lips?
242
00:09:54,761 --> 00:09:56,304
- Mm-hmm.
- He's cute.
243
00:09:56,304 --> 00:09:57,514
Mm-hmm.
And I'm making eyes at him.
244
00:09:57,514 --> 00:09:59,641
He's making eyes at me.
We're, like, vibing, right?
245
00:09:59,641 --> 00:10:00,809
Mm-hmm.
246
00:10:00,809 --> 00:10:02,602
So I invite him home.
247
00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:15,031
Can I get you anything?
248
00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:16,366
I'm starving.
249
00:10:16,366 --> 00:10:17,701
We should have
grabbed some pizza.
250
00:10:17,701 --> 00:10:18,827
Pizza?
251
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:20,286
Pizza! Pizza!
252
00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:21,371
Who are these?
253
00:10:22,539 --> 00:10:24,249
These are the little ones.
They're my roommates.
254
00:10:24,249 --> 00:10:26,334
Uh, they're from Wisconsin.
255
00:10:26,334 --> 00:10:27,252
They love pizza.
256
00:10:27,252 --> 00:10:30,839
Pizza?
257
00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:32,632
Guys, come on. I got company.
258
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,467
- TV!
- Oh, shit.
259
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:36,553
You guys watch
"True Women of New York"?
260
00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:37,971
Guys, come on.
261
00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:40,515
So at this point, we're
having, like, a little party,
262
00:10:40,515 --> 00:10:42,142
like drinks, whatever.
263
00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:44,310
So I decided to take this time
to go and douche.
264
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:46,604
- Douche for that guy?
- Yeah.
265
00:10:46,604 --> 00:10:48,565
Okay, not the vibes
I was getting, but work.
266
00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:51,192
So anyway, I'm in
the bathroom for a while,
267
00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:53,945
and the party's still going on
outside, so it's no big deal.
268
00:10:53,945 --> 00:10:59,576
But then I hear the party
stop, so I go outside.
269
00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:00,702
Diego?
270
00:11:08,251 --> 00:11:12,255
Diego?
271
00:11:14,758 --> 00:11:16,551
Oh, I see.
272
00:11:16,551 --> 00:11:18,219
Mm. Pizza.
273
00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:22,766
I walk into
the master bedroom.
274
00:11:22,766 --> 00:11:24,601
Diego?
275
00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:25,685
Were they, like...
276
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:27,354
Hey.
277
00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:30,482
I don't even wanna tell you,
but he's like, come here.
278
00:11:31,983 --> 00:11:33,651
What did you say?
279
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:35,612
I'm good.
280
00:11:35,612 --> 00:11:38,365
I'm gonna be
in the living room.
281
00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:42,035
Call them out
on their bullshit.
282
00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,286
Yeah, okay. You're right.
283
00:11:43,286 --> 00:11:46,039
Did you say, hey, don't fuck
the guys I bring home?
284
00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:47,248
Yeah.
285
00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:49,626
So what did you say?
286
00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:50,794
Pizza, pizza.
287
00:11:50,794 --> 00:11:52,212
Pizza! Pizza!
288
00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:54,506
No. No.
289
00:11:54,506 --> 00:11:56,508
But we haven't seen pizza in weeks!
Please???
290
00:11:56,508 --> 00:11:59,344
Look, I feel like
some of you think
291
00:11:59,344 --> 00:12:01,638
that because we share a space
292
00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:05,475
that maybe I'm down
to share everything.
293
00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:08,019
And I guess normally
that's true.
294
00:12:08,019 --> 00:12:11,314
It's just that I--
I don't know.
295
00:12:11,314 --> 00:12:16,111
It hurts my feelings to feel so
invisible among you sometimes.
296
00:12:16,111 --> 00:12:18,196
And I don't want
the vibe to be toxic.
297
00:12:18,196 --> 00:12:21,408
And, you know, I don't want
you guys to feel like
298
00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:22,742
it isn't your safe space,
299
00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:24,244
because it's also
my safe space,
300
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:29,332
and I wanna be able to share,
but I can't share everything.
301
00:12:29,332 --> 00:12:31,835
I don't know.
I hope that makes sense.
302
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,839
Are we good?
303
00:12:35,839 --> 00:12:37,424
Babe.
304
00:12:39,009 --> 00:12:41,177
Wait, did you guys
get tickets?
305
00:12:41,177 --> 00:12:42,512
Can I still get some?
306
00:12:42,512 --> 00:12:44,014
I'll ask them to list you.
307
00:12:44,014 --> 00:12:45,724
Oh, Jesus.
308
00:12:46,808 --> 00:12:48,518
Hey.
309
00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:50,145
Hey, man.
310
00:12:50,145 --> 00:12:51,688
Hey.
311
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:54,190
Yeah, I know.
Let's take a cab.
312
00:12:54,190 --> 00:12:56,401
- Come on.
- Bye, Diego.
313
00:12:58,361 --> 00:13:01,781
Next up, Gina and Bibo.
314
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:04,159
And you'll do a scene
from "Marriage Story."
315
00:13:04,159 --> 00:13:05,994
"Marriage Story," yes.
316
00:13:08,413 --> 00:13:11,041
- Could I get a minute?
- Yeah, take your time.
317
00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:14,044
Okay.
318
00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:18,631
Your hair is fine, Gina.
319
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:28,558
You always hated me.
320
00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:30,560
That's not true,
dot, dot, dot.
321
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:32,103
That was never true, dot.
322
00:13:32,103 --> 00:13:34,564
What are you talking about,
question mark.
323
00:13:34,564 --> 00:13:36,941
You are my wife, dot.
324
00:13:36,941 --> 00:13:38,318
Okay, let's stop.
325
00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:41,154
I'm sorry,
did you have a note?
326
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:42,364
Um.
327
00:13:42,364 --> 00:13:44,240
What's the feedback?
328
00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:47,869
I just see robot.
329
00:13:47,869 --> 00:13:52,832
I see a robot pretending
to love this woman.
330
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:56,211
And because you are giving
nothing but robot,
331
00:13:56,211 --> 00:13:59,089
you are forcing her to overact.
332
00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:03,343
Is everything okay?
333
00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:07,639
- See you later, Bibo.
- Bibo.
334
00:14:07,639 --> 00:14:09,808
Bibo.
335
00:14:09,808 --> 00:14:10,892
Do you know about the dress?
336
00:14:10,892 --> 00:14:13,812
The 2017 viral image
featuring a dress
337
00:14:13,812 --> 00:14:15,188
that was blue and black
to some,
338
00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:17,315
- white and gold to others.
- Yes.
339
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:21,152
The dress isn't one thing
and then another thing.
340
00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:23,947
The dress can be more
than one thing at once.
341
00:14:23,947 --> 00:14:29,077
You can be a robot
and an actor.
342
00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:35,208
Maybe just use your robotness
to be...
343
00:14:35,208 --> 00:14:36,710
an actor.
344
00:14:38,545 --> 00:14:41,006
It's grown.
It's definitely grown.
345
00:14:41,006 --> 00:14:43,216
I bet WebMD is gonna be
really comforting.
346
00:14:47,846 --> 00:14:50,181
Oh, what is this?
347
00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:56,312
Oh, good, good, good,
good, good.
348
00:14:56,312 --> 00:14:58,314
I bet I'm gonna have
this online doctor's
349
00:14:58,314 --> 00:14:59,733
undivided attention.
350
00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:18,918
What is it?
351
00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:22,881
Fuck.
352
00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:32,015
Um, it looks fine.
353
00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:33,933
Hey, lady, you can't
be doing that here.
354
00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:36,353
Get up. Come on.
355
00:15:36,353 --> 00:15:38,104
- Gotta get up.
- No.
356
00:15:39,314 --> 00:15:41,358
Fuck.
357
00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:44,444
I pressed the wrong thing.
358
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:46,613
Whatever. It's just a biopsy.
359
00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:06,591
Oh, Jesus, a scalpel.
Okay, it's gonna hurt.
360
00:16:06,591 --> 00:16:08,510
Please, I'm working on getting
an exception for Proof,
361
00:16:08,510 --> 00:16:09,844
but I don't know that
I have a lot of time.
362
00:16:09,844 --> 00:16:11,930
My doctor's actually worried,
and he ordered a biopsy.
363
00:16:11,930 --> 00:16:14,057
Well, not the doctor,
but the person on the app
364
00:16:14,057 --> 00:16:16,976
who I think are technically
doctors, and I, um--
365
00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:23,525
What's that sound?
366
00:16:30,573 --> 00:16:32,075
What's this?
367
00:16:32,075 --> 00:16:34,119
This shipwreck on a reef
encrusted with little oysters?
368
00:16:37,580 --> 00:16:40,208
It's missing an oyster.
369
00:16:40,208 --> 00:16:42,669
Yeah, it's an old
family heirloom.
370
00:16:42,669 --> 00:16:46,256
Priceless, but worthless
without that missing piece.
371
00:16:51,011 --> 00:16:52,679
I think I know where it is.
372
00:16:52,679 --> 00:16:56,224
If I bring it to you, do you
think you could upload me?
373
00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:02,397
We could pay off Dad's bills
with that money.
374
00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:06,860
- All of them?
- Yeah.
375
00:17:13,950 --> 00:17:15,660
Fine.
376
00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:18,204
You bring the oyster,
you don't need the Proof.
377
00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:21,041
Great. How hard can it be?
378
00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:26,212
To find a tiny mini...
379
00:17:36,931 --> 00:17:40,685
Tabitha, those books
are forbidden.
380
00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:42,979
- Hey, slut.
- Not this green wig.
381
00:17:42,979 --> 00:17:44,439
It's not a wig.
It's natural.
382
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:47,025
I'm dead.
You're an icon and I love you.
383
00:17:47,025 --> 00:17:48,026
Mwah, mwah.
384
00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:49,569
Meet my friends.
Meet my friends.
385
00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:51,780
It's Tyler, Ryan,
Ryan, and Jason.
386
00:17:51,780 --> 00:17:52,864
Do you want a drink, babe?
387
00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:54,949
Yeah. You know what I like.
388
00:17:54,949 --> 00:17:56,785
Okey dokey.
389
00:18:00,288 --> 00:18:02,374
Unlock the power
of natural...
390
00:18:02,374 --> 00:18:04,751
Ugh, someone made
a fake profile of me again.
391
00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:06,795
Well, that's how you know
that you've made it.
392
00:18:06,795 --> 00:18:08,296
That happens to me
all the time.
393
00:18:08,296 --> 00:18:11,341
Oh, are you, like,
an actor or something?
394
00:18:11,341 --> 00:18:13,468
I'm like an actor, yeah.
395
00:18:13,468 --> 00:18:15,261
Yeah, Trish is a whole thing.
396
00:18:15,261 --> 00:18:16,429
What have you been in?
397
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,556
"That Time We Were There"
on Amazon,
398
00:18:18,556 --> 00:18:20,183
"Summer's Only Once a Year"
on Netflix,
399
00:18:20,183 --> 00:18:22,185
"The Tooth Fairy" remake
on Zappos.
400
00:18:22,185 --> 00:18:24,854
- Lots of stuff.
- I'll have to check it out.
401
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,316
Hi, Emily. Luis here.
402
00:18:28,316 --> 00:18:29,776
Here's the fan art
you commissioned.
403
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:33,279
Always available
if you want more.
404
00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:34,614
Thanks, Luis.
405
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:38,243
Kindly, Emily, manager
and publicist for Trish.
406
00:18:42,831 --> 00:18:44,374
Trish's number one fan here.
407
00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:46,710
Check out this piece I made
in honor of my muse.
408
00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:51,589
And I admire that
because it's a lifestyle.
409
00:18:54,509 --> 00:18:55,593
Wow.
410
00:18:55,593 --> 00:18:57,512
Always so surprised
and honored by my fans.
411
00:18:57,512 --> 00:18:59,014
My life is so crazy.
412
00:18:59,014 --> 00:19:01,599
I can't believe I inspire
real fans unprompted
413
00:19:01,599 --> 00:19:03,268
to make fan art of me.
414
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:07,272
Oh, my God, Trish,
the thing you just reposted.
415
00:19:07,272 --> 00:19:08,690
Let me see.
416
00:19:08,690 --> 00:19:11,693
"The Glenda we all deserve."
417
00:19:11,693 --> 00:19:13,903
Shots fired.
418
00:19:13,903 --> 00:19:16,197
- Who made that?
- @TrishFanboy.
419
00:19:16,197 --> 00:19:18,616
Trish is so famous,
she has fan accounts.
420
00:19:21,619 --> 00:19:23,538
Well, diamonds are
a girl's best friend.
421
00:19:23,538 --> 00:19:25,457
Yeah, if they're real.
422
00:19:25,457 --> 00:19:27,584
She's so stupid.
423
00:19:27,584 --> 00:19:29,377
Yeah, she's stupid.
424
00:19:31,254 --> 00:19:32,756
Ugh, I wanna go there.
425
00:19:32,756 --> 00:19:34,424
That's my dream place.
426
00:19:34,424 --> 00:19:36,092
I've been there.
427
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:39,512
- Gay icon.
- Gagging for my queen.
428
00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:40,847
Slay.
429
00:19:40,847 --> 00:19:42,390
Oh, my God,
Trish is so iconic.
430
00:19:42,390 --> 00:19:44,267
Honey, the queen
has arrived.
431
00:19:44,267 --> 00:19:46,186
Hey, @TrishFanboy,
this is Luis.
432
00:19:46,186 --> 00:19:47,645
I was commissioned
by Trish's team
433
00:19:47,645 --> 00:19:49,272
to make this art
for a charity.
434
00:19:49,272 --> 00:19:51,483
Please tag me
whenever you repost.
435
00:19:51,483 --> 00:19:52,817
Thanks.
436
00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:02,660
Hi, Luis, Emily again.
437
00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:04,496
You are not allowed
to promote your services
438
00:20:04,496 --> 00:20:05,955
using the work
we commissioned from you.
439
00:20:05,955 --> 00:20:07,457
Those were for charity.
440
00:20:07,457 --> 00:20:09,209
Unfortunately,
we will not be able
441
00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:10,960
to compensate you
for this piece.
442
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:12,671
I can't think
about this right now.
443
00:20:12,671 --> 00:20:14,923
I've got a lunch tomorrow
with some of the city's
444
00:20:14,923 --> 00:20:16,800
biggest movers and shakers.
445
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,176
Last night I was thinking--
446
00:20:18,176 --> 00:20:19,636
What charity?
447
00:20:19,636 --> 00:20:22,263
They're only posted
by some random fan account.
448
00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:27,936
Wait, is she the fan account?
449
00:20:27,936 --> 00:20:29,979
To eavesdrop on personal,
private conversation
450
00:20:29,979 --> 00:20:32,357
between friends.
451
00:20:32,357 --> 00:20:35,068
Wait, so she paid
for her own fan art?
452
00:20:37,862 --> 00:20:40,740
Yeah, and I have receipts.
453
00:20:57,465 --> 00:20:58,383
Bitch.
454
00:20:59,759 --> 00:21:01,177
Oh, my God.
455
00:21:01,177 --> 00:21:02,512
OMG, Trish, you missed it.
456
00:21:02,512 --> 00:21:03,847
Rewind for Trish.
457
00:21:03,847 --> 00:21:05,140
Hey, rewind it.
458
00:21:05,140 --> 00:21:06,850
Derrick, it's live.
459
00:21:12,439 --> 00:21:13,940
You can keep blocking me,
460
00:21:13,940 --> 00:21:15,859
but I'll just keep making
new accounts.
461
00:21:17,402 --> 00:21:18,570
Have you guys ever had
an online stalker?
462
00:21:18,570 --> 00:21:20,530
Is someone stalking you?
463
00:21:20,530 --> 00:21:22,699
Oh, no, not me.
I'm helping a friend out.
464
00:21:22,699 --> 00:21:24,159
He has this, like,
crazy guy that
465
00:21:24,159 --> 00:21:25,285
keeps making fake accounts.
466
00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:27,078
Some homophobic psycho.
467
00:21:27,078 --> 00:21:28,997
That's so nice of you
to help him out.
468
00:21:28,997 --> 00:21:31,249
I mean, he could just
make his account private.
469
00:21:31,249 --> 00:21:33,001
No, he wants to be seen.
470
00:21:33,001 --> 00:21:35,587
How do you get them
to stop making new accounts?
471
00:21:35,587 --> 00:21:37,505
I don't think you can.
472
00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:39,257
It's so toxic.
473
00:21:41,176 --> 00:21:43,345
Wait, is she
blocking people now?
474
00:21:43,345 --> 00:21:45,263
Hey, Luis, DM me.
475
00:21:45,263 --> 00:21:47,891
I knew it.
This girl isn't even famous.
476
00:21:47,891 --> 00:21:49,225
Is she serious?
477
00:21:49,225 --> 00:21:50,352
This is actually--
478
00:21:53,313 --> 00:21:55,190
Hey, Derrick, can I
talk to you for a second?
479
00:21:55,190 --> 00:21:57,984
Sure.
480
00:21:57,984 --> 00:21:59,277
BRB.
481
00:21:59,277 --> 00:22:01,154
Let me know what happens.
482
00:22:01,154 --> 00:22:02,614
You okay? What's up?
483
00:22:02,614 --> 00:22:04,657
I need you to help me block
someone, like, permanently.
484
00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:05,992
This is for your friend?
485
00:22:05,992 --> 00:22:07,202
Yeah, I need you
to ask Jeremy.
486
00:22:07,202 --> 00:22:09,120
- Jeremy?
- Your fucking boyfriend?
487
00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:10,872
- He works at Facebook now.
- Uh-huh.
488
00:22:10,872 --> 00:22:13,166
I need him to block them.
They keep making accounts.
489
00:22:13,166 --> 00:22:14,376
I need to block them
from, like,
490
00:22:14,376 --> 00:22:15,460
their IP address or something.
I don't fucking know.
491
00:22:15,460 --> 00:22:17,212
What is this about?
492
00:22:17,212 --> 00:22:19,381
- I'm this.
- Uh-huh.
493
00:22:19,381 --> 00:22:21,299
No, listen,
I'm the fan account.
494
00:22:21,299 --> 00:22:22,884
- You drew this?
- No.
495
00:22:22,884 --> 00:22:24,344
- My manager commissioned it.
- Why?
496
00:22:24,344 --> 00:22:25,637
She fucked up.
497
00:22:25,637 --> 00:22:26,805
She found this guy
on I don't know where
498
00:22:26,805 --> 00:22:28,640
to make a fan art of me
for the fan account.
499
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,559
So this fan account
is run by you?
500
00:22:31,559 --> 00:22:33,561
Everyone does it.
Everyone does.
501
00:22:33,561 --> 00:22:36,106
I'm iconic. Look at me.
I'm a whole thing.
502
00:22:36,106 --> 00:22:37,440
But this is not a real fan.
503
00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:38,650
But the art inspires
a lot of people.
504
00:22:38,650 --> 00:22:40,193
To make art of you?
505
00:22:40,193 --> 00:22:42,028
Yes, but now the artist
is telling people.
506
00:22:42,028 --> 00:22:43,321
Now people know.
507
00:22:43,321 --> 00:22:44,447
But not if we
permanently block him.
508
00:22:44,447 --> 00:22:45,699
- Who made this?
- Some kid.
509
00:22:45,699 --> 00:22:46,783
I don't know. Emily found him.
510
00:22:46,783 --> 00:22:49,077
- Emily?
- My fucking manager.
511
00:22:49,077 --> 00:22:50,453
She keeps doing this.
512
00:22:50,453 --> 00:22:51,913
She's obsessed.
513
00:22:51,913 --> 00:22:53,248
She wants to
"Single White Female" me.
514
00:22:53,248 --> 00:22:54,457
Emily what?
515
00:22:54,457 --> 00:22:56,418
What if all the gays
turn on me?
516
00:22:56,418 --> 00:22:57,961
- Emily what?
- What?
517
00:22:57,961 --> 00:23:00,005
What is your manager's
last name?
518
00:23:01,798 --> 00:23:05,093
Oh. Trish.
519
00:23:05,093 --> 00:23:07,762
And the Red Nose Day issue?
520
00:23:07,762 --> 00:23:10,807
The GoFundMe for that kid?
521
00:23:10,807 --> 00:23:13,059
I knew it. I fucking knew it.
522
00:23:13,059 --> 00:23:15,437
No one is posting
fake photos of you.
523
00:23:15,437 --> 00:23:17,188
No one's catfishing as you.
524
00:23:17,188 --> 00:23:19,232
Baby, are you on crack?
525
00:23:19,232 --> 00:23:22,318
What is wrong with you?
You're not famous.
526
00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:24,195
You're paying people
to make fan art of you.
527
00:23:24,195 --> 00:23:26,948
I'm dead.
I'm literally freaking dead.
528
00:23:42,630 --> 00:23:43,882
I'm iconic.
529
00:23:45,550 --> 00:23:47,594
I'm--I'm iconic.
530
00:23:47,594 --> 00:23:49,846
Iconic.
531
00:23:49,846 --> 00:23:51,848
Everyone's obsessed with me.
532
00:23:51,848 --> 00:23:55,060
Everyone's obsessed
because I'm iconic.
533
00:23:58,021 --> 00:23:59,189
Thanks.
534
00:24:02,901 --> 00:24:07,781
The next L train will arrive
in 248 minutes.
535
00:24:07,781 --> 00:24:10,367
Hey, I'm worried about
Derrick's drinking.
536
00:24:10,367 --> 00:24:12,494
He was really sloppy
when I left.
537
00:24:12,494 --> 00:24:13,912
He could have
really hurt himself.
538
00:24:28,927 --> 00:24:33,098
Martine.
539
00:24:33,098 --> 00:24:35,600
Martine!
540
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:38,395
Oh, my God.
541
00:24:38,395 --> 00:24:40,105
God, you didn't hear me?
542
00:24:40,105 --> 00:24:42,190
I was just calling your name,
like, three times.
543
00:24:42,190 --> 00:24:43,983
What--gosh. Oh.
544
00:24:43,983 --> 00:24:45,985
Are you still in performance?
545
00:24:45,985 --> 00:24:48,738
What was it?
Um... Vanessa, right?
546
00:24:48,738 --> 00:24:53,284
Vanesja with a J.
Like the hotels.
547
00:24:53,284 --> 00:24:55,578
Sure. Right. Gosh.
548
00:24:55,578 --> 00:24:57,789
You took my course years ago.
549
00:24:57,789 --> 00:24:59,916
You know, I was so riveted
when I heard
550
00:24:59,916 --> 00:25:03,545
you were so committed
to your thesis.
551
00:25:03,545 --> 00:25:06,214
But some people are like,
oh, yeah, no, I don't think
552
00:25:06,214 --> 00:25:07,841
she's in performance anymore.
553
00:25:07,841 --> 00:25:10,385
I think she's
genuinely an agent.
554
00:25:10,385 --> 00:25:12,971
But that's not true, is it?
555
00:25:15,682 --> 00:25:17,851
Huh.
556
00:25:17,851 --> 00:25:20,520
You're not prolonging
your performance piece
557
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:23,273
'cause you're scared of
graduating with an arts degree
558
00:25:23,273 --> 00:25:25,984
and not having money
or insurance
559
00:25:25,984 --> 00:25:29,529
or qualifying
for Proof of Existence, right?
560
00:25:29,529 --> 00:25:31,698
I mean, you're not
having your cake
561
00:25:31,698 --> 00:25:33,658
and eating it too, are you?
562
00:25:36,286 --> 00:25:37,912
- I have to go.
- Sure.
563
00:25:37,912 --> 00:25:42,625
Yeah, I have
a very important cli--client.
564
00:25:42,625 --> 00:25:44,627
- Client.
- Waiting.
565
00:25:44,627 --> 00:25:45,712
Sure.
566
00:25:45,712 --> 00:25:48,340
Very nice.
567
00:25:48,340 --> 00:25:51,343
You know, Vanesja,
like the hotels,
568
00:25:51,343 --> 00:25:53,136
the job of the artist
is to make people
569
00:25:53,136 --> 00:25:55,013
see things in a different way.
570
00:25:55,013 --> 00:25:58,892
How does this performance
change anything?
571
00:25:58,892 --> 00:26:01,603
Just something for you
to go home and munch on.
572
00:26:01,603 --> 00:26:03,021
All right?
573
00:26:03,021 --> 00:26:04,189
I'm not gonna wait
for the bus anymore.
574
00:26:04,189 --> 00:26:06,399
I think I'm gonna walk.
575
00:26:06,399 --> 00:26:09,194
You can't even walk
in those shoes, can you?
576
00:26:09,194 --> 00:26:13,031
You're weak. You're weak.
577
00:26:13,031 --> 00:26:14,491
Excuse me.
578
00:26:17,202 --> 00:26:19,704
I should help.
579
00:26:19,704 --> 00:26:21,539
Why else am I an artist
580
00:26:21,539 --> 00:26:24,626
if not to make the world
a better place?
581
00:26:40,684 --> 00:26:41,726
Hey, babe?
582
00:26:41,726 --> 00:26:43,353
Hey. Hi.
583
00:26:43,353 --> 00:26:46,356
Sorry, I'm--I'm sort of
in the middle of something.
584
00:26:46,356 --> 00:26:48,608
I--I finally got a biopsy,
585
00:26:48,608 --> 00:26:52,862
and the, uh, the--the doctor
seems kind of worried.
586
00:26:52,862 --> 00:26:55,865
Aw, listen, I think
we're gonna have to find
587
00:26:55,865 --> 00:26:58,952
another way
to get you an exception.
588
00:26:58,952 --> 00:27:00,495
Wait, why?
589
00:27:00,495 --> 00:27:04,958
Well, it's just,
you look amazing in the photo,
590
00:27:04,958 --> 00:27:08,294
but, um...
591
00:27:08,294 --> 00:27:10,672
it's just not your face.
592
00:27:10,672 --> 00:27:13,383
So I think our only option now
is to pitch Zappos
593
00:27:13,383 --> 00:27:14,801
that idea of yours.
594
00:27:14,801 --> 00:27:16,803
You know, the how I--
595
00:27:16,803 --> 00:27:18,388
No, no.
There is no way.
596
00:27:18,388 --> 00:27:21,182
I will not be selling out.
Thank you.
597
00:27:22,642 --> 00:27:23,852
Hello.
598
00:27:23,852 --> 00:27:25,020
I hear you have an idea
for a show for us.
599
00:27:25,020 --> 00:27:26,604
I do, and I am very excited
600
00:27:26,604 --> 00:27:27,772
to be sharing it
with you today.
601
00:27:27,772 --> 00:27:29,941
Okay, so remakes
are very in right now, right?
602
00:27:29,941 --> 00:27:31,901
Right, right, right.
Okay, give it to me.
603
00:27:31,901 --> 00:27:33,653
Feed me. Feed Susana.
604
00:27:33,653 --> 00:27:37,449
Okay, so how about
a remake of "The Lion King"?
605
00:27:37,449 --> 00:27:41,661
Uh, this remake stars a zebra,
just, like, a random zebra
606
00:27:41,661 --> 00:27:42,912
that otherwise
would be considered
607
00:27:42,912 --> 00:27:44,622
an extra in the movie.
608
00:27:44,622 --> 00:27:47,000
But this zebra is like, wait,
why are lions our leaders?
609
00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:48,877
Who elected them the leaders?
610
00:27:48,877 --> 00:27:52,088
Why do we have to bow down
to them and get eaten by them?
611
00:27:52,088 --> 00:27:54,632
So then the zebra
leads the revolution,
612
00:27:54,632 --> 00:27:57,052
but then the zebra does
end up getting eaten.
613
00:27:57,052 --> 00:28:01,014
But as the zebra lays dying,
looking up into the heavens
614
00:28:01,014 --> 00:28:03,641
with, like, maybe, like,
the sun reflected on his eye
615
00:28:03,641 --> 00:28:07,437
and thinking, well,
you know, at least I tried.
616
00:28:07,437 --> 00:28:08,980
Ugh! Cut the bullshit.
617
00:28:10,023 --> 00:28:12,108
- Hmm?
- Huh?
618
00:28:12,108 --> 00:28:14,819
Cut the bullshit.
619
00:28:14,819 --> 00:28:16,780
You know what we want,
and we know what you want.
620
00:28:16,780 --> 00:28:19,115
You need a little piece of
paper that says you don't need
621
00:28:19,115 --> 00:28:20,825
another little piece of paper.
622
00:28:20,825 --> 00:28:22,285
If you don't sell a show,
623
00:28:22,285 --> 00:28:24,537
you don't get exception
from Proof of Existence,
624
00:28:24,537 --> 00:28:26,956
and you don't
get to upload yourself.
625
00:28:26,956 --> 00:28:27,957
That's right.
626
00:28:27,957 --> 00:28:29,959
I got your medical records.
627
00:28:29,959 --> 00:28:33,588
Zappos level intel.
628
00:28:33,588 --> 00:28:36,424
I know you're expecting
bad news, and selling a show
629
00:28:36,424 --> 00:28:38,259
is the only way
to become incorporeal,
630
00:28:38,259 --> 00:28:40,679
given that your little oyster
is at the bottom of the sea.
631
00:28:40,679 --> 00:28:44,724
So let's quit
playing games, huh?
632
00:28:44,724 --> 00:28:46,976
Grow up. Give us what we want.
633
00:28:46,976 --> 00:28:48,436
Give us your trauma.
634
00:28:48,436 --> 00:28:49,979
Give it to us funny.
635
00:28:49,979 --> 00:28:54,317
Give it to us
en espanol, por favor.
636
00:28:54,317 --> 00:28:58,697
Okay, well, I do have
an idea in case of emergency.
637
00:28:58,697 --> 00:29:00,156
Mm-hmm. Yes?
638
00:29:00,156 --> 00:29:02,742
I was hoping I would
never have to use.
639
00:29:02,742 --> 00:29:05,036
Mm-hmm. Say it.
640
00:29:06,329 --> 00:29:08,832
It's a script titled...
641
00:29:08,832 --> 00:29:09,958
Well, say it.
642
00:29:22,387 --> 00:29:23,847
That's a show.
643
00:29:28,435 --> 00:29:29,477
Okay.