ALLISON LANGDON: Previously on Parental Guidance...
I can do Lego but I can't do this!
..our last set of focus parents swung into action.
FAMILY MEMBERS: Yeah!
But a knock at the door... (KNOCKS)
I have a delivery for your mum. Do you mind if I take it in?
It's really heavy and it's... it's raining.
Uh, OK.
..knocked them for six...
Once the door opened, that's the point.
That frightens me to death.
In a real-life situation, you're gone already.
That guy has snatched you.
..while the unstructured parents...
(CHEERING) ..were voted best of the night.
I feel proud. So proud.
Tonight...
Giant baby has entered the pool...
..the kids take charge of playtime.
Why did you pick me to play, anyway? I know I'm gonna win.
I am not cheating!
Yeah, you are, actually. I'm not!
But when let loose in an ice cream shop...
Can I have four flavours?
NICK: What made you get that much?
..will they lose control?
MAN: What do you think's gonna be reasonable?
He didn't give them freedom of choice.
Maybe in the future, you could just let them do it themselves.
And could your child find their way home...
Wait, am I going the wrong way?
..on their own?
MAN: Where are you off to today? Uh...
Oh...
No! No!
PIA: I don't know which level I go to.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
# At least I had fun
# Oh, at least I had fun... #
Hi, parents. Nice to see you.
WOMAN: Hello.
JUSTIN: Chris and Philippa, to the hot seat, the focus parents.
Hey, Amy and John.
Hi, Melody and Michael.
Kim and Nick.
Focus parents, welcome.
Panel parents, make yourself at home.
Welcome back.
Focus parents, this is the final day of challenges.
So, last night,
Melody and Michael were voted our most popular style so far.
Let's see how you go tonight.
Kat, our honest parent, and Mark and Leanne, our team parents,
will be heading through to the final
to decide Australia's best parenting style.
Panel, tonight you will vote
for the last set of parents to be joining them.
Are you ready to play ball? Definitely.
(WOMEN LAUGH)
Anyone here had a brain freeze before?
Our focus parents sure have.
In this challenge, we asked you to give your kids $50
to buy an ice cream by themselves.
No rules, no restrictions.
For this challenge,
we want to see if our parents can relinquish control
and give their kids a sense of ownership and achievement
in doing something autonomously.
We're testing confidence and self-control.
The more a child is used to being told what to do,
the more likely they are to overdo it when the reins are off.
Do your children know their limits?
(MOBILE PHONE DINGS)
What?
What will they buy? Oh! Oh!
Ha-ha-ha! Come in, we'll have a look.
In this challenge, we are testing whether the kids show restraint
or do they overindulge?
Alright, we're gonna let you go in and get some ice cream.
Yay.
You can get whatever you want, no restrictions.
Time for a sugar rush.
(LAUGHS)
In the American approach, I talk to Pia all the time
about, you know, eating healthy foods.
We try to keep the treats on the healthy side as well.
Take that. $50?
OK. Good. Alright.
OK.
She's never been given the option to just go into the ice cream shop
and get whatever you want, see you later.
We've always supervised her to make sure that... Absolutely.
..she gets the portion size that she's actually capable of consuming.
Yeah.
Could I get three different flavours, please?
(LAUGHTER)
The lemon... Lemon.
Two scoops of lemon?
Chocolate.
Lemon AND something else. She's gone for the big one.
Oh, well, that's four scoops. Holy what?
Four... (LAUGHS)
And the creme brulee.
What? And another flavour?
(LAUGHTER)
I thought Pia would come out with a cone,
with one or possibly two scoops.
Wow. Oh, my god.
Oh, my god. Look at that. (LAUGHTER)
But she came out with... (LAUGHS)
an unmanageable cup of huge amounts of ice cream.
I just think it's a little wasteful.
So, what are we gonna do with it when you don't finish it?
I don't know, throw it out? (LAUGHS)
I know it's a waste.
What made you get that much? I had 50 bucks.
I thought I'd spend it wisely.
(LAUGHS)
(LAUGHTER)
(LAUGHS)
MELODY: There's no rules. You can buy whatever you want.
(LAUGHS)
As unstructured parents,
Michael and I probably set a pretty bad example for the kids
because treats are not really a sometimes thing in this house.
Sometimes foods are all-the-time foods.
(LAUGHTER)
CHILD: (SQUEALS) That was wiggly ice cream!
I really expected the kids to get mile-high cones of ice cream
with 150 flavours and every topping.
I want to get three flavours.
GIRL: Three flavours? Yeah?
I'm so excited!
(LAUGHTER) Now Gummy Bears and Oreos.
Oh, my god. Look at that. That is stacked. (LAUGHS)
MILLER: Wait, I've changed my mind.
Can I have four flavours? You sure can.
Yeah, YOU want an ice cream. I know.
I'm so sorry, but can I just have one more flavour?
Yes. (LAUGHS)
Alrighty. Enjoy that one.
MAGNOLIA: We've got to take one for my baby sister.
I think she would like strawberry.
When the kids came out,
Miller had a five-scoop cone with a couple of toppings.
I tried to get a bunch of flavours for us to all share.
Oh, we got one for Maisy!
Yum! That looks delicious!
(MAISY SQUEALS)
Can I just say, Melody and Michael,
I loved how your kids thought of the other little one...
Mmm. ..and also thought of you.
MELODY: Yeah.
Let's talk about Kim and Nick.
I love that she turned it into a business opportunity.
You know, the way she thought about it was really cool.
Like, you know, she's gonna be hard-core.
That was funny that she said that, yeah.
Because it was $50 for one child,
do you think she would have went less over the top
if she had less money?
Yeah, I mean, she's never been given free rein like that
to just do whatever.
Do you think she went so over the top
because she doesn't normally get that free rein?
Yeah, she's never been given that opportunity.
She's never been given more than two scoops.
She's never been given more than one scoop, Nick.
Because I know she won't finish it.
DEEPAK: While someone is eating,
we don't like to put words of shaming and guilt.
There's been times when we've been eating
and someone's made these very comments in jest...
Yeah.
..and the whole thing becomes distasteful.
Mmm.
That's a good point. Yeah.
Like, "Do you really need that?" Yep, because...
And then you're thinking, "Well, I'm actually getting right into it"
and then, "Oh, I probably don't." WOMAN: Yeah.
ALLISON: Let's take a look at another two parenting styles.
Peyton, I'll give you the money. OK.
Make sure you look after the girls and help them.
Yep. And we'll see you in a bit.
OK. Off you go. See you.
GIRL: Let's go.
I think with slow parenting,
we try and allow our kids some autonomy in making decisions
depending on what the situation is.
Let's go see what ice creams they've got.
$50 is a lot of money
but I just thought that they would get what they want
and hopefully figure out with themselves,
check in with themselves how hungry they were.
Which ones did you want, B?
I want Tim Tam, strawberry and mint choc.
And mint? Yes.
Thank you. For you.
PHILIPPA: What did you choose? Oh!
Oh, my goodness. Did you get three flavours?
Three. Yeah.
What did you get? (LAUGHS)
If I was choosing their ice cream then, yeah, I would've got one scoop
because I knew, you know, that it might not feel so great
in their body afterwards.
You might need some courtesy licks there, Aves.
But I was happy for them to figure that out for themselves
and then they learn the lesson,
rather than Mum just telling them do or don't do that.
Are you happy with your choices? Yeah. Mm-hm. Yeah.
This was probably a really good teaching moment
because it taught them to tune back into their bodies
and realise, you know, what those sort of natural consequences are
of indulging.
At the time, it seems good but then afterwards it's, like...
ugh, maybe a little too much.
My tummy is the same. Is your tummy full and sore too?
Oh, no. We've got to listen to our bodies, don't we?
Do we have to find a bathroom? Yep.
AMY: Alright, let's go. (BOY HUMS)
Hot fudge sundae. Banana split.
Oh, there's waffle with banana, Nutella and ice cream.
JOHN: Oh, Mum!
The kids love ice cream.
But we don't give it to them very often.
Huh, what do you think's gonna be reasonable?
Now that we're on the road and we're road-school parents,
we definitely are mindful of the money that we're spending,
so I think the kids inadvertently learn
about making sure that they don't overindulge in things
that aren't necessary.
So, what are you thinking in terms of the price?
7.70. 7.70?
Yeah, it says up there. Yeah?
Has anyone done the maths yet?
I just wanted for them to have the information
so they could decide themselves. Yeah.
Skip, what are you thinking? I don't know.
I'm not pushing you, but the boys are gonna have a single.
OK, guys, are you right there?
I'm gonna start, please, with a hedgehog cone.
Yep. A double one? Triple one? What do you think?
Double. OK. What else you gonna have, guys?
I'll have the cookies and cream.
Rightio.
Gusso, what are you thinking, bud?
GUS: Cookies and cream.
Just a single one? Yeah. Thank you.
Are you sure? I can stack it up for you. No.
Good boy.
AMY: They definitely surprised us in this challenge.
I thought they would've been a little bit more indulgent
but it was so nice to see that they had that restraint and self-control.
Jimmy, you're making short work of that.
Why didn't you go the triple? Would've been too much.
(LAUGHS)
I thought, John, you challenged your eldest
and said, "You don't want two scoops?"
And he stuck to his game. He said "No, I just want one.
"I think it'd be too much."
What we probably did find
is you guys were sort of very much in their ear all the time.
You didn't give them full self-control, like, saying,
you know, "Be mindful of this and watch out for this"
and I guess they didn't necessarily have freedom of choice, per se.
I think we just wanted them to consider, in a sense,
you know, what things cost, what...
You know, what you were getting and how... Yeah.
..you we're gonna feel at the end of it. Yeah.
We don't make money on the road... Yeah.
..so there's no income for us for 15 months.
Maybe in the future you could see if they've learnt anything from it
and can think themselves... Yeah.
..and be able to do all that on their own.
Philippa, I loved that you said
"They've gotten too much ice cream. They're gonna have...
"And they're probably gonna get sick.
"Oh, well, it's gonna teach them a lesson."
They... Yeah, they all commented that they all felt sick.
Yeah, they all felt sick for the rest of the day.
If we want to have responsible kids,
we have got to give them responsibility.
When we give them responsibility, they often make big mistakes.
When they do that, it's not time to take responsibility away from them,
it's time to have a conversation.
When ordering for themselves,
let children have some autonomy regularly
and they'll learn their own limits much faster.
OK, a reminder to our panel parents too, keep taking notes
because we're gonna be asking you to vote for the parenting style
that you'd like to see go through to the final challenge,
the parenting style that you think works best.
I've been really interested and looking forward to seeing
what the American parenting style has to offer.
I think Kim and Nick are definitely building a confident woman.
A little bit concerned about the flippancy of, "You know what,
"if I have to waste it, I have to waste it."
Money's a bit of an important issue for me, being a single parent,
so I suppose I'm a little bit more conscious of that.
I think if it's a challenge and you've been given the freedom,
then they should be able to choose whatever they want
and if they eat too much and vomit,
then they won't forget that next time.
Coming up...
Do you want black?
I don't think we ever really even look at their school reports.
Oops.
..we put unstructured parenting to the test.
'Cause the report card explains to you
how much effort your child has put in.
While a kids-only mission...
You're not gonna cry?
..has the parents worried.
What bus do you need to catch?
Do you have a pen so I can write it on my arm?
How do you navigate it? Taxi.
All the things that we've done has come to this moment.
And at the end of the night,
which of our four focus families will be voted through to the final?
# Mama told me, oooh "Baby, lift your head..." #
We're on the home stretch
in the search for Australia's best parenting style.
We're taking an in-depth look
into how each of our focus parents raise their kids.
Melody and Michael, let's find out about unstructured parenting.
Unstructured parenting is a child-led approach to parenting.
It's all about giving the child independence
to make their own decisions
and not forcing them to follow a lot of rules.
FAMILY MEMBERS: Hi!
I'm Melody. I'm Michael.
This is Magnolia, Miller...
And Maisy.
And Wavealicious!
Come on in. (LAUGHS)
We like to give our children autonomy over their own decisions.
Do you want black? Yeah, sure.
It's the only colour we have.
The life of a musician is definitely unstructured.
It's definitely not something that's the same every day.
We adapt as we go along.
You can see my dirt-infested nail underneath.
Dirt-infested nails mean you've had a good time in life.
We don't say things like "You can't eat lollies after 8:00pm"
or "You can't draw on anything in the house."
Oopsy.
You know, we don't really follow a schedule.
We're rolling around on the floor
and building forts or doing talent shows at 9:00 at night.
# I've got a friend named Maggie... #
We don't really have any set expectations of our children
with schooling.
I don't think we ever really look at their school reports.
As adults, I don't want to raise members of society
that do what they're told when they're told.
I love the fact that there's no gender swaying.
Like, if you want to paint your nails, paint your nails.
I'm all for questioning authority at times when it's necessary
but the reason that there is this structure around life
is because it works, yeah?
It keeps people safe.
Do you feel it might be teaching your children
to go too far the other way?
It could, in a way, put them in danger at times.
I don't tell my kids to break rules or not follow rules.
I definitely tell my children that the rules of school
are the rules that you need to follow
because you're in that environment.
With the no-bedtime thing,
if your children, say, do go to bed at midnight,
do they still go to school the next day or...?
They don't go to bed at midnight on a school night.
OK.
We have different hours that we work
and if we're working until 10:00 at night
and, say, one of the kids is still awake,
we actually want to be able to spend some time with them
and if they're not desperately tired,
we might spend that time to have a connection with them
and then we might sleep in in the morning.
I don't look at report cards either.
I just want my kids to want to go to school every day...
Yeah. ..and be happy.
Report card doesn't just say how many days you've had off
or anything like that.
It actually explains to you
how much effort your child has put into that subject.
You know, whether they be good at it or not, effort is still...
Paramount. Yeah.
If my child wasn't putting effort in in a subject, I would know about it.
I loved the unstructured parents and the way they did things
because there was a lot of respect for their children,
their children's autonomy
and I thought it was beautiful.
For us, unstructured just wouldn't work in our lifestyle at all.
We've got too much happening around us for that to work.
Let's have a look at another challenge.
If you dropped your kids off in the middle of the city,
could they find their way home all by themselves?
A little bit terrifying.
This challenge tests independence and resourcefulness.
Have you prepared your children for the real world?
And have you given them the confidence to tackle a task
that's outside their comfort zone?
Focus parents, this is the first time
you have seen this footage of your kids.
(DING!)
Oh, hey, I've got a text, guys.
OK. It says:
Oooh! So we have to go catch a bus?
Yeah.
We're looking to see if the parents can let go
and if the kids are able to be independent.
How do you feel about it? Nervous.
I'm a bit nervous for you.
Yeah, I'm a bit nervous for you too, actually.
It's not rare for them to be pushed outside their comfort zone
but the thing is, we've lived here for six days where we are right now.
We don't know Perth. We hardly have driven through Perth.
How would you get home to start with? How do you navigate it?
Probably a bus and then, like,
once you get on to, like, a main road, sort of thing.
Yeah.
Might have to do a combination of a few things.
BOY: Taxi.
All the things that we've done has come...
It probably feels like to this moment, like,
to let them prove themselves.
Good luck, hey? Yeah.
Bye! (EXCLAIMS)
Go to the road.
They'll be sweet. Yeah, I know.
See, that's Hay Street there.
We've gotta keep walking down.
Hay Street? Yeah, see?
Hay Street. Hay Street Mall.
SKIPPER: Is that our bus? 9:30.
Alright, we've gotta pay.
Um, we're just going to Thornlie.
DRIVER: Thornlie? Yeah.
Thank you.
No seatbelt?
(AMY LAUGHS)
When was the last time you went on a bus, little man?
Last year.
We're at Thornlie, Jimmy.
Thank you.
All good? Yeah.
There's a taxi.
DRIVER: Howdy, guys. Hello.
Where are you off to today? Uh, the Carmel Cider farm.
OK. Jump on board and we'll get you there.
How far down this road are we? Uh, not too far.
Not too far. Like, it goes off to the right.
Oh.
JOHN: Hey, there's a taxi.
Thank you, mate. DRIVER: Thanks, guys.
JOHN: Whoo-hoo-hoo! (AMY LAUGHS)
Yes!
Our kids have grown enormously
since adapting the road-school parenting style.
Legend!
They are more confident, they're resilient.
They're young men. Yeah, they are.
Superstar.
Well done. Come here, you!
(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)
How do you think you would get help? We live far from here.
We live, like, 45 minutes away.
Oooh.
Pia has never been in the city alone by herself.
She's actually never really been anywhere by herself.
Yeah, but I don't ever do that.
But anything is possible, right?
I'm certain it can be done.
American parenting style
really dictates that you don't show any weakness or fear.
You're not gonna cry or get upset or stressed?
You kind of just go "Yeah, come on. You've got this. You can do this."
Alright. Come on.
Off you go. Off you go. Straight ahead.
Straight.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
(CRYING)
Oooh.
Hi. Um, I'm going to...
Um, I'm going to Carindale.
(BEEPING)
DRIVER: Thank you.
(BEEPING) Thanks.
Oh...
NICK: Hopefully she's here soon.
Oh, that's you! There she is.
(LAUGHS) Hello!
Hey, P!
Our American parenting style
definitely helped with this whole challenge.
Good girl.
It helped get her on board with the idea that she could do it.
A bit scary? A bit scary, yeah.
Yeah?
Pia nailed it. She did a brilliant job.
I was so happy she had a smile on her face when she came home.
I feel sort of bad that she was scared at the start.
Yeah. I felt really bad.
The resilience that she showed to be afraid but still...
Yeah. ..persevere...
Oh, yeah, that's true.
..that's an amazing trait to build in a child.
Let's talk about Amy and John.
How did you feel actually watching that?
I was a bit panicked, to be honest.
And then Skipper said, "Can we just go?"
(LAUGHTER)
Can I just say how polite your boys are?
Mmm. The manners they showed was amazing.
They're unreal. Just... They had it all sorted.
(LAUGHTER)
Really, really impressed with the road school.
The kids were amazing
and I think they were just so street-smart.
The American parents were really encouraging Pia,
really speaking belief into her
and it gave her the courage
to actually take that next step and do it and she smashed it.
Next... Can I get a Big Mac, please?
..an unexpected pitstop.
Food.
Oh...
And slow parenting makes a controversial choice.
Would you have caught the bus by yourself? Yeah.
Didn't it say can the kids get home?
We didn't help them, though.
Why didn't you just let Peyton do it?
Mmm...
We're in the middle of a challenge
where the children must find their way home all by themselves.
Time to see how our other parents did in the same challenge.
"Can your kids find their way home all by themselves?"
Oooh... We have to go catch a bus?
When I first saw the challenge, I was pretty nervous.
Our way of slow parenting, most of the time we do everything together.
It's a priority for us.
Do you know where our closest bus stop is?
Yes.
I feel ready for anything.
Peyton was a pretty cool, calm cucumber just, like, "Oh, OK.
"That's what we're doing? Sweet. OK."
Do you want to catch the bus? (WHINES)
(LAUGHS) Oh, you feel nervous?
Come over here, I'll give you a cuddle.
But Avery was certainly making it clear
that she didn't really want to go, so it really was the only solution.
Do you want Mummy to come on the bus with you?
It would've been unfair from how we parent and what we teach the kids
to then turn around and say, "You can't have this adventure."
Maybe what we can do to make it a kids' challenge
is you guys just have to navigate.
Do you want to open it up
so you can see the whole thing a bit more easier
and you might be able to get your bearings with other landmarks?
We need the street signs. Can you see any around?
Well, that says Shield Street Mall.
So, 142. We're taking the green route.
142.
OK, then we go down there...
That's it. That's it?
Yeah.
Oh, thank you.
Hold on.
Oh... (LAUGHS)
Would you have caught the bus by yourself?
Yes.
Do you know where we are?
Just press the button. Press the button.
Is this close to our house? Do we press it?
What do you think? Yeah. Press.
(BEEPING)
It was great. Like, it was exhilarating.
Like... Yeah, it was fun.
I think it was the most fun challenge
because it was an adventure and we all got to partake.
Thank you.
Alright, let's go.
Can I ask, Chris and Philippa, didn't it say can the kids?
Did it say can the family help the child get home?
We didn't help them, though.
We did what everyone else did in terms of setting up the map
and bringing it out on the bus and we just followed them.
We didn't give them any instruction.
We let them re-correct.
We let them see the bus sign, we let them push the button, we looked...
Like, they saw the landmarks...
I feel it was a little bit directed, though.
"Does this look like we're near home?"
"Oh, yeah. Do I press the button now?"
Mmm...
Why didn't you just let Peyton do it
and take Avery maybe on a bus another day,
just to see how we did the challenge like the other kids did?
For us, we put more of the emphasis on the children staying together,
which in that one included us.
And the girls were just really excited.
Having watched everyone else do this,
do you kind of wish that you'd just given Peyton the opportunity
and actually embrace the challenge for what it was meant to be?
I think this was sticking true to our parenting style
in terms of how we would teach them to do something
as we would probably show them how to do it
so that they would then do it by themselves.
The purpose of this challenge is to see how children aged nine and up
are able to tackle the task of finding their way home on their own.
If a child shows that they're ready to do something
that is developmentally age-appropriate,
we owe it to them as parents to really let them spread their wings.
I loved that the slow parents were able to stand up and say, you know,
"This is not OK for our child."
I thought it was great because it meant they got to involve
all of their children in something.
The slow parents may be a little bit overprotective of their children
and I feel like that might be doing more harm than good.
ALLISON: OK.
Melody and Michael,
are you guys ready to take a look at how your son Miller went?
Are you excited to give it a crack?
Yeah, definitely I'm gonna go.
What bus do you need to catch? The 555.
Wait, do you have a pen so I can write it on my arm?
I need to tell you something really cool.
You remember payphones when Mummy used to make prank calls?
Yep, yep, yep. (LAUGHTER)
You could call me on a payphone.
I think my first reaction was probably mostly excitement,
which is kind of how we operate in the unstructured parenting style.
We're, like, "We'll be excited first
"and then we'll work the rest out later."
Bye. Bye.
We love you, mate. Bye, bud.
Our kids are not scared of the world.
Our kids will take the world on head on.
Wait, am I going the wrong way?
I feel like I've gone the wrong way.
Hi. MICHAEL: (ON PHONE) Hey, bud.
I don't know if I'm going the right way.
Well, the sign just says Pancakes. Yeah, OK. I know where you are.
You need to get one more street further up George Street.
OK. Thank you.
555.
Can I get a Big Mac, please?
(LAUGHS)
Yes, please.
(LAUGHTER)
Sure, I'll just give you this. No worries.
Oh, no. There's a bus.
Shoot.
Oh...
You know what...
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
Um... Stop...
Order 62. Order 62. Big Mac.
Was that his? Oh, no!
MELODY: He didn't get his Big Mac.
(LAUGHTER) Bummer.
MICHAEL: Yeah, what time did you say it was coming?
Oh, he's already been. Like, he must've missed buses.
Wait, is this... Is this where I get off?
Oh...
It's been ages.
Do you think he's gonna be at the bus? Ah! It's Miller! Look!
He's here! He's here! He did it!
Miller!
ALLISON: Let's go to the panel.
LEANNE: I'm so proud. Yeah.
And they're not my kids! Yeah.
I love it how he backed himself from the beginning.
I think why he backed himself is that you were so confident in him.
There wasn't any hint of,
"Oh, my god, he's not gonna be able to do this."
American, sole parenting, nailed it. Unstructured, nailed it.
Road school, nailed it.
This whole show is about challenging ourselves and our kids.
I'm a little bit disappointed...
I feel like the slow family didn't really get the assignment.
Kids need to learn independence.
It builds resilience and helps them to solve problems.
They feel competent, which elevates confidence.
ALLISON: Next, as we head towards the final vote,
we learn more about road school parenting.
JOHN: Schoolwork. Green folder.
AMY: Road school parenting involves
structured learning for a couple of hours and then we teach life skills.
But can our panel get on board?
We are really mindful that the kids integrate with other kids.
Would you say it's like a big holiday?
No way. It's definitely not a holiday.
And later, a shocking surprise rocks the room.
Ali and I have a wildcard to play.
Before we get to our last challenge of the night
and our panel casts their deciding vote,
we've got one final parenting style to hear more about.
Let's have a look at Amy and John and their road school parenting.
Here we go.
Road school parenting values an education in the school of life
and embracing a simple lifestyle
focused on travelling and shared experiences.
AMY: Hi, we're the road school family.
And welcome to our home.
Whoo-hoo! Yee-hee!
We have three boys, we live in a caravan and travel full-time.
Do you want to grab the map?
We'll show everyone where we've been.
I'll grab it. Thanks, Gus.
Skipper, what's in the middle here? Uluru. A big rock.
Big rock.
We were travelling for what was meant to be about 12 months
and we're now travelling Australia for about two years.
Or as long as we can. Yeah.
Until the money runs out. (LAUGHS)
School work. Green folder.
For us, road school parenting
involves structured learning for a couple of hours in the morning...
(SOUNDS OUT LETTERS PHONETICALLY)
Had. Had. Good.
And then we teach life skills.
(KIDS SQUEAL)
We get out, surf, fish, anything that's outdoors.
BOY: I see you.
They say you get 18 summers with your kids
before they want to go off with their own friends
and I think you need to make the most of every single one of them.
Five bucks if you can tip him out, Jimmy.
Before road schooling, our kids were so caught up in the rat race.
John worked a job that required him to do a lot of hours
and I worked and ran a household and all that sort of stuff.
Turn around, turn around!
Yes. Good job!
I feel like I've changed a lot since being on the road.
I feel like I'm more connected to the kids.
Mum got marshmallows? Yes, I do.
Oh!
And I feel like I'm far more patient.
I think I'm a bit more reflective of the way I speak to them.
Look at that sky, boys. Have a look at where we are.
Life is adventure.
(APPLAUSE)
Road school parenting.
I think that you'd know, it's safe to say
you would be the envy of many, many people.
I think it's wonderful that you've got that priority,
the balance of the school work, first thing,
and then that mindset of "It's not just in the books."
You can't teach that.
Would you say it's like a big holiday?
No. No way.
We've still gotta do school work,
we've still gotta do our washing every day,
we've still gotta get food
and when you're 600km from somewhere where you can't camp,
where don't have any water, where don't have any...
it's definitely not a holiday.
Yeah, you've gotta get there.
Can I just ask, Jimmy is a tweenager,
so he's going through all of those stages in life
and I guess it's fully a fairly sort of developmental time for him
to be around his friends.
Yeah, so we are really mindful that the kids integrate with other kids,
so we will, instead of shying away
from caravan parks in the school holidays,
we tend to go to them, even though it's gonna cost us a lot more money
so then we can build relationships
because there's always lots of kids there, obviously.
But I don't think they miss their friends and family that much,
like, anymore.
Like, they're so wound up in all our cool stuff we're doing.
I love that they're spending so much quality time, you know,
with each other
but I need a shower.
(BOTH LAUGH) Like, seriously.
When something is easy, we call it child's play.
But our final challenge is far from easy.
We asked you to play with your children their way
and for as long as they wanted.
When kids play, they're totally in the moment,
so learn to ignore your phone, the chores and the mental checklist
and spend at least part of your day being totally present with them.
With this challenge,
we're testing whether parents can hand over control,
get down on their kids' level and really connect with them.
(DING!)
(LAUGHTER) JOHN: Oh, Lord.
Oooh. This is gonna be interesting.
In this challenge, we want to see how engaged our parents can be
when immersing themselves in playtime.
Hey. Hi.
Alright, you guys are in charge.
What are we gonna do? What are we gonna play?
For slow parents, this challenge was pretty easy and straightforward
because this is what we pretty much do each day, is we play with them
and we let them choose what they want to do.
Got any ideas, mate? Oooh.
Probably a board game.
Board game? Board game? What about you, Aves?
Vets. You want to play vets? OK.
Oh, you're so gentle.
Are you gonna go all the way up her arm, maybe?
It's not always the type of play that I enjoy
but I'm always willing to do it.
That's what she loves to do.
Just go... Oh...
Oh... Oh... Oh, it hurts.
And, yeah, sometimes you just have to let them completely lead
and make up the rules.
What do you want to do now, Aves? Play it again.
Play it again?
(LAUGHTER)
So, do you want to tell me what you want to do, Maggie?
In unstructured parenting,
play is pretty much in everything that we do.
It's one of the foundations of our parenting style.
I'm playing Barbies with Mummy.
Playing Barbies with Mummy.
Miller, do you want to tell Mummy and Maggie what do you want to do?
Oh, yeah, I want to play guitar together.
Gonna play guitar with Dad?
Yeah, that sounds amazing. Super fun.
So surprising. I know. (LAUGHS)
We make a living out of being creative people,
so it's hugely important to us to foster that in the kids.
(PLAYS RIFF) So, where?
So, fifth fret...
No, too far. So, yeah, tenth fret there.
I think this was a really good way
to show why unstructured parenting works for us.
(LAUGHTER)
The giant baby has entered the pool!
GIRL: He's on top of me! The giant baby's squishing people!
(SQUEALS)
(LAUGHS) Oh...
(LAUGHTER)
With unstructured parenting, you engage a lot with your kids,
which is really amazing.
Watching Miller have such a genuine in-synch desire
to be musical with you,
that wasn't a chore.
That was just... Like, that was quite powerful.
And you are just doing such a great job at imagination building.
I think, like, for us,
I don't love that imaginative kind of play so much.
Gotta suck it up... I'd rather run around.
But I think it's important to give her
those little opportunities to connect as well.
I don't play Barbies. I couldn't think of anything worse.
JUSTIN: Why, Kat?
I'm a let's run, let's go outside.
Mummies and babies is the one I hate. Oh...
Unless I can be the baby and just lay there asleep.
Yeah. (LAUGHTER)
Or... Or you go play hide-and-seek and you tell them to go and hide.
(LAUGHTER)
Playing the game your kids want to play can be boring
but if your relationship with your child has been struggling,
it might be time to hand over control.
Get in there. Just play.
It's about T-I-M-E. Time.
That's how kids spell 'love'.
Next...
You have to pay $30.
You have to pay $100.
It's $200.
..as the final challenge comes to an end...
Because you're cheating. I am not cheating!
Yeah, you are, actually. I'm not!
..will our panel change their vote?
It goes pretty heavily against our parenting style.
As soon as you put labels on them, they will take it, internalise it.
Once a child starts to cheat, you're out.
Before we get to our final vote,
we need to see our last two sets of parents roll the dice
in the Child's Play Challenge.
We've got to do a playtime where you get to decide
what kind of play we're gonna have to do together.
And which parent you want to play with.
Yeah. OK.
You get to decide that.
In our American parenting style,
once the work is done and the list is accomplished for the day,
then there's free time.
We could... We could play Hong Kong Monopoly.
I think Monopoly is a great game to play with your kids
because it teaches them so many things
while they're actually having fun and playing.
If you want to win, like, you know, you've got to manage your money.
I picked you to play because I regularly play with Mum in Monopoly
and also I know I'm gonna win, so...
(LAUGHS) Oh, you know you're gonna win, do you?
(LAUGHTER)
Pia made me feel really, really good that she wanted to play with me
because I haven't had the opportunity to play with her
after my back surgery just in more recent months.
So I think she was looking forward to it
because I was able to actually sit down for over an hour
and actually play with her.
OK. Almost snake eyes.
Pay 200 to the bank.
You have to pay $30.
You have to pay six... $12.
You have to pay $100.
Pay $100.
It's $200.
(LAUGHTER)
I'm out.
(LAUGHS)
Congratulations. Good job. Well done.
(PARENTS LAUGH) Whoo-hoo!
And I let her win.
(BOTH LAUGH) Oh, you did not!
(LAUGHS) You did not.
(LAUGHTER)
Can I just quickly say,
you both brought me so much joy and happiness watching that.
I thought it was great.
The relationship between a daughter and a father
is a very beautiful thing.
Thanks.
Nick, can I just ask you, because we know you've got a bad back...
Yep.
..how emotional is that for you at times
that you perhaps can't do as much with Pia as you would like?
Well, with regards to my back, I've had five fusion surgeries.
It's only been until probably the last three or four months
where I've actually been able to more actively partake in Pia's life
and I actually think that's why she chose me to play that game...
Yeah. ..because she's missed out on me.
That's really special, Nick. Yeah.
Time to see how Amy and John did in the same challenge.
What do you want to do? Footy feud.
Footy feud? Cards? Yeah.
The footy feud. Oh, footy feud, Gus.
Let's play that.
As a road school family,
there are days where we're just hanging out of the van
and they've got to create their own fun
and we do play lots together, yeah.
We've got to add it up.
24, 24... 56...
He's in the lead at the moment. Yeah, by three.
By three. By three, so he's gonna...
Now it's my turn.
Everything in our house is a competition. Yeah.
Who do you want to take 12 off?
You. (LAUGHS) I knew you'd say me.
Who's winning? 'Doggy'.
Flogging us. Yes.
When we were playing the game, Skipper had won all three games,
which was annoying to me, 'cause I wanted to win. (LAUGHS)
So I feel like you're cheating a lot.
Is this the last quarter? Is that why he's winning?
Yeah, he picks up so many cards.
(LAUGHS) What?
I feel like you've got way too many cards in your hands.
What? I'm gonna win again. Go, Gus.
Yeah, no, he is. He's cheating. GUS: Exactly.
Gus... SKIPPER: I'm not cheating!
Yeah, you are, actually. I'm not!
You are. No!
Look at yourself, bud.
You idiot!
Go and apologise to him.
No, he doesn't need to apologise. He did cheat.
Oi.
You're taking it all a bit serious, mate.
There was a couple of times you got some extra cards
and whether you thought it or not, it was a little bit cheating.
Look at me, though. It's just a game.
It's not serious life. It's just a game.
(LAUGHS)
Amy and John, we do the same with our kids.
We play a lot of board games, a lot of Uno and cheating isn't allowed.
Like, once a child starts to cheat, we're actually, like, "You're out."
I love the way you said "You cheated,"
as opposed to "You're a cheater"
because as soon as you put labels on them,
they will sort of take it, internalise it.
I think probably in that moment,
I probably probed a little bit too hard
in terms of just saying it a lot, especially to Skipper,
'cause his reaction is to do that.
Justin, is it OK to allow your kids to cheat? (LAUGHS)
JUSTIN: OK, the correct answer is it depends.
It depends on their age
and it depends on what you're actually doing.
What matters most is the way that you talk about it with them.
A harsh start-up such as "You cheated" or "You're a cheat,"
that sort of starts up here
and so you're always gonna be met by your children
at the same level or higher.
When parents use strong words,
they'll be met by big strong words and emotions from the kids,
so, instead, describe what you can see
rather than using labels to correct behaviour.
Remember, you're playing the long game.
Over the past two nights,
we've seen all of you undergo
hair-raising and hilarious parenting challenges.
Well done.
Focus parents, after the first two rounds of challenges,
Kat, our honest parent, and Mark and Leanne, our team parents
were voted through to the final challenge.
Now we're gonna find out
who of our four focus families will be joining them
to face the ultimate test of parenting
in the Extreme Family Mission.
The Extreme Family Mission, I don't know what that means
or what that looks like, but we're definitely up for the challenge.
It'd be great for us to get through to the final.
When we set out on the show,
that we really wanted to add to our parenting...
and I think we've done that over the courses of the challenges.
OK, panel parents, come on down.
Let's get into it, hey?
Let's talk about Melody and Michael, our unstructured parents.
Do you want black? Yeah, sure.
That's the only colour we have.
We like to give our children autonomy over their own decisions.
You can see my dirt-infested nail underneath.
MAN: Do you mind if I take it in? Can I take it?
It's really heavy.
Oh...
We're supposed to deliver it right inside.
No, sorry.
(TIMER BLEEPS) There goes the timer!
It's OK.
(SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
Do you feel like keeping on working? Yeah!
But do I feel like it?
It sort of goes pretty heavily against our style parenting style
to not finish something that you start, especially around your kids.
I agree, especially once they get into high school and university
and stuff like that.
I think it's important that they have goals that they finish.
I think there's a positive aspect about their parenting,
about the growth of free thought that showed in their son.
There's a certain amount of maturity within that.
Let's talk about Chris and Philippa, slow parenting.
Alright, who's gonna see the first spiderweb, I wonder.
CHRIS: When you slow down, everything gets easier.
The kids are happier.
One, two, three.
Yay! Whoo!
We are those parents who pack them
with all the fruits and vegetables at school.
Yum. Mmm. Yum, yum.
(CRIES)
Do you want Mummy to come on the bus with you?
Maybe you guys just have to navigate.
MILLER: Yes, press the button. Press the button.
Is this close to our house? Do we press it?
What do you think? Yeah. Press.
(BEEPING)
Philippa talks about their lifestyle
and how they've chosen to slow things down.
They prioritise connection and I think that's really important.
I think that they're afraid to let their kids get upset.
I have a big issue with this.
The challenges in this are all done in a safe environment.
These are all the times that you want to push your kids,
you want to have a crack.
If you as a parent know
that you can challenge your kid in a safe environment,
I think you should go for it.
Yeah. Mmm. Yep.
Next, our panel votes for their third finalist.
That statement, OK, but a bit contradictory...
When she's an adult, that's gonna be a big issue.
And a shock reveal.
Justin and I have a big announcement to make.
Tonight, it's crunch time
for the American, slow, road school and unstructured parents
as our panel decides
who will be going through to the Extreme Family Mission.
OK, panel parents, let's talk about Kim and Nick, our American parents.
KIM: Hard work is paramount in this family.
It's, like, feeling beautiful. (LAUGHS)
There's lots of expectations that go along with that,
but we try to do it all with a lot of support and love.
I'm just not gonna try the mushrooms.
I'll skip the mushrooms.
I think we should renegotiate that.
NICK: Yeah, there you go.
Anything is possible, right?
I'm certain it can be done.
I'm going to Carindale.
(LAUGHS) Hello.
How did it go?
MAN: Do you think your mum and dad love you?
Yes, definitely. How do they show that, Pia?
They show that they love me by always praising me,
they always help me.
They're always, like, by my side.
We've seen a lot of love, a lot of trust, a lot of consideration
but she was genuinely proud of who her mum and dad was
and I thought that was amazing.
I think a big positive is the amount of self-belief and self-confidence
that is in that child because of that parenting style.
I think Kim and Nick are really fostering a good work ethic with Pia
as well.
I really like the style but one concern I always have
is when people get older,
they say "I'm gonna do this to prove to my parents
"that I blah blah blah blah blah."
That's really concerning for me.
I don't think anyone should need to prove to anyone anything
and I feel like there is a lot of that
"I'm doing this 'cause Mum and Dad, you know, are proud of me."
It's a huge driving force for all kids
that they want to make their parents proud
but, yeah, it can go next level.
Yeah. Mmm.
Yep. ALLISON: OK.
Let's talk about Amy and John, the road school family.
JOHN: Turn around, turn around.
AMY: For us, road school parenting involves structured learning
and then we teach life skills.
We've gotta keep walking down Hay Street.
Thank you.
GUS: It goes off to the right. MAN: Thanks, guys.
MAN: Tell me what your favourite things are about Dad.
Calming down Mum when she's REALLY angry.
Don't... Gus, don't.
I am. I've got all the pieces... I need you to stop.
Get the book... No.
Just sit down. Come on.
Come and work it out, you two.
They're like adults. They're just like little men.
(LAUGHS) And it's so true to their style.
They're very resourceful.
I guess you've gotta respect their parenting style
as the ability to adapt.
They've adapted from how they used to be
to something completely different.
Yeah.
I feel a little uneasy
that maybe they need from their dad to learn to show respect to women.
Yeah.
I understand that.
It's made me think and John didn't pull the kids up when they said no
or backchatted or anything like that.
OK. I think we have talked through now.
Can I ask panel parents to return to your seats?
This is the big decision.
We need to know who you are sending through to the final Family Mission.
The American parenting style is definitely working with Pia.
Even with one child, they're absolutely nailing it.
She's an incredible kid.
Right from the start, we have really connected with the slow parents
and the way that they value their children's autonomy
and building them up for the future
by showing them such love and gentleness.
JUSTIN: Perfect. Thank you.
KAT: I can see aspects of both road school and unstructured parenting
that I'm really, really fond of.
I don't know if either of them would work for me on a full-time basis
but they've both got really great strengths.
OK, panel, let's bring back in our focus parents.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
Focus parents, you have all done so well in your challenges.
But only one set of parents can go into the final.
Joining Kat, our honest parent,
and Mark and Leanne, our team parents,
in the Extreme Family Mission are...
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
..Kim and Nick, our American parents.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) KIM: What?
No way!
(LAUGHS)
We were not expecting that. No.
Not expecting that at all.
Very overwhelmed. Yeah.
That's amazing.
How do you think Pia's gonna feel about this?
Over the moon.
(LAUGHTER)
Oh, my gosh, the first thing we're gonna do is call Pia.
She'll be so excited about this.
Well, congratulations, guys. You're through to the final!
Wow.
The American family do so well in everything they do.
They push their child to a limit that they know that she's capable of
so she does succeed and she does get empowered by that.
It's time to let you know what the final Extreme Family Mission is.
Heading deep into the Aussie mountains,
our parents are going wild.
No phones, no Wi-Fi, no TV.
Stripped bare of all creature comforts,
we want to see how your parenting style holds up
when things get really tough.
Our finalists will face challenges that'll push them and their kids
to the absolute limit
and at the end, one of you will be voted
Australia's best parenting style.
We can't wait to see how you go.
(LAUGHS)
But before we send you into the wilderness,
Justin and I have a big announcement to make.
And we've decided there's another set of parents
who deserve a shot at the title of Australia's best parenting style.
Along with the three sets of parents that you voted through to the final,
Ali and I have a wildcard to play.
You've all been listening, watching and making great comments
but these parents have given their all in every challenge.
They've always been ready to listen closely, question respectfully
and offer warm and wise words of parental guidance.
These parents have shown us a lot
and now we need to see more.
The wildcard parents we're choosing
to go on the Extreme Family Mission are...
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
..Sammy and Jason, our lighthouse parents.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
Yes!
Come on! We are much like a lighthouse.
We observe from a distance
but ultimately, if they ever do get into trouble, they can come to us.
Are you feeling brave? Yeah.
You can do this. GIRL: You've got this.
(GASPS) Oh!
Good boy! GIRL: Come and get it!
Guys, guys, don't fight, don't fight.
It's not nice. Do 21 Is It or something like that.
GIRL: Thank you. It's not nice to fight.
ALLISON: Guys...
That's actually really unexpected
'cause, like, these people are amazing people,
so we all deserve to be part of this final.
Oh, you're all incredible.
We are very, very humbled by Justin and Ali's decision
to send us through to the final.
It was not expected.
Thank you. Appreciate it.
And for the kids to be recognised that they're incredible humans
is lovely.
Mark and Leanne, Kat, Kim and Nick, Sammy and Jason,
pack your bags.
We'll see you in the final.
VOICEOVER: It's all come down... to this.
Who will you crown Parenting Champions?
In the must-see grand finale, the final four...
Alright, let's go.
Woo! (CROWD OF PARENTS LAUGH)
..face their wildest...
Ah, I can't do it.
Are you gonna tell me 'no' on a footy field?
..most emotional... (CHILD SCREAMS)
(CHILD CRIES)
She was terrified.
..test yet.
I'm just, like, incredibly inspired by you.
Find out which parenting style...
..is best.
The best parenting style is...