1 00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:13,262 對 2 00:00:13,263 --> 00:00:17,266 這個刺青本來應該會比較大 可是他們沒墨水了 3 00:00:17,267 --> 00:00:19,060 真是動人的致敬方式 4 00:00:19,061 --> 00:00:20,144 謝了 5 00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:22,981 我覺得這樣讓大家知道 我老婆去世了,算是挺酷的 6 00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:26,567 很高興這件事解決了 7 00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:27,903 妳喜歡夏多內白酒嗎? 8 00:00:28,570 --> 00:00:31,030 對,我在第一次約會都喜歡喝夏多內 9 00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:33,115 因為我想讓對方知道 10 00:00:33,116 --> 00:00:36,244 我喜歡狂歡,但我同時也是個成年人 11 00:00:36,245 --> 00:00:38,412 所以只要菜單上有炸彈蝦 12 00:00:38,413 --> 00:00:41,165 我一定會點,因為我覺得蝦子很高級 13 00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:42,167 - 對 - 不過炸彈呢… 14 00:00:42,835 --> 00:00:44,502 就像是“等等喔…” 15 00:00:44,503 --> 00:00:45,586 - “這傢伙很危險耶” - 對啊 16 00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:46,713 什麼都有可能發生 17 00:00:47,381 --> 00:00:48,965 - 什麼都可能發生 - 對 18 00:00:48,966 --> 00:00:50,259 我可以再看一次嗎? 19 00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:52,135 不如就別再提這個了 20 00:00:52,928 --> 00:00:54,971 跟你說,我根本不懂你怎麼有辦法來約會 21 00:00:54,972 --> 00:00:56,514 畢竟我比妳早知道這件事 22 00:00:56,515 --> 00:01:01,895 對,但這樣不會有點覺得 你在背著她劈腿嗎? 23 00:01:03,772 --> 00:01:05,815 現在感覺有一點了 24 00:01:05,816 --> 00:01:07,650 是這樣的,我女兒跟我痛苦了很久 25 00:01:07,651 --> 00:01:09,277 但我們現在好多了 26 00:01:09,278 --> 00:01:11,405 - 你有個女兒? - 我有,對 27 00:01:12,114 --> 00:01:13,656 失去母親的小女孩? 28 00:01:13,657 --> 00:01:16,450 她18歲了,不過是啊,對 29 00:01:16,451 --> 00:01:17,786 她很…難過 30 00:01:18,954 --> 00:01:20,037 我很遺憾 31 00:01:20,038 --> 00:01:21,873 何不換個話題,聊些輕鬆的呢? 32 00:01:21,874 --> 00:01:23,000 妳是哪裡人? 33 00:01:24,293 --> 00:01:26,252 - 沒事的,妳可以的 - 我是… 34 00:01:26,253 --> 00:01:27,712 說個城市名稱就好 35 00:01:27,713 --> 00:01:29,172 我是芝加哥人 36 00:01:29,173 --> 00:01:30,174 芝加哥熊 37 00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:32,508 芝加哥公牛 38 00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,678 我就是放不下你老婆的事 39 00:01:35,721 --> 00:01:36,804 好 40 00:01:36,805 --> 00:01:37,890 討厭啦 41 00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:40,516 我只是覺得你是個很好的人 42 00:01:40,517 --> 00:01:44,061 上帝會將最艱困的試煉交給最堅韌的靈魂 43 00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:45,271 你有聽說過嗎? 44 00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:46,773 我真的很抱歉 45 00:01:47,858 --> 00:01:48,983 約會如何? 46 00:01:48,984 --> 00:01:50,943 她哭到都嘔吐了 47 00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:53,988 嘿,你讓自己走出去,就已經是進步了 48 00:01:53,989 --> 00:01:55,449 我以你為榮 49 00:01:56,992 --> 00:01:58,285 這對我意義重大 50 00:02:00,871 --> 00:02:05,875 別用那種眼神盯著我 彷彿你是收容所裡的最後一隻狗 51 00:02:05,876 --> 00:02:07,460 - 你們準備好了沒? - 我好了 52 00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:09,295 但我覺得這隻阿福還需要一點時間 53 00:02:10,005 --> 00:02:12,591 你為何這麼害怕有意義的眼神接觸? 54 00:02:14,676 --> 00:02:16,260 我被迷死了 55 00:02:16,261 --> 00:02:19,180 我想我要去鬧鬧爸 跟他說我現在也想生一個 56 00:02:19,181 --> 00:02:22,350 讓我的其中一個兒子搞大肚子 我就給妳五萬美金 57 00:02:22,351 --> 00:02:24,810 妳剛剛提議要付錢給青少女從事性行為耶 58 00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:25,938 對啊,有意見嗎? 59 00:02:26,563 --> 00:02:28,272 那你們為什麼要單獨待三天? 60 00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:30,107 我們想要有培養家庭感情的時間 61 00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:31,943 - 噢 - 隨便啦 62 00:02:31,944 --> 00:02:35,196 對啊,而且莉茲老是待在這裡 我們不想讓莎頓誤會她是媽媽 63 00:02:35,197 --> 00:02:38,741 查理是爸爸,而我只是那個 搞笑的性感鮮肉房客 64 00:02:38,742 --> 00:02:40,034 沒人那樣認為 65 00:02:40,035 --> 00:02:41,036 你已經40歲了 66 00:02:41,787 --> 00:02:44,830 好,那我們來看看 你們有沒有辦法靠自己吧 67 00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:47,083 - 好,來吧 - 你們要怎麼知道尿布濕了? 68 00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:50,002 - 拜託,那條線會變藍色 - 簡單,會有咯吱聲 69 00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:52,505 你們要去吃早午餐的時候,她要穿什麼? 70 00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:54,257 我們不會去吃早午餐 71 00:02:54,258 --> 00:02:55,675 她還沒接種疫苗 72 00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:58,261 不過等她接種好之後 就會有一場變裝早午餐 73 00:02:58,262 --> 00:03:00,471 她會打扮成女神咕咕卡卡 74 00:03:00,472 --> 00:03:01,889 讚喔 75 00:03:01,890 --> 00:03:02,974 好 76 00:03:02,975 --> 00:03:08,230 我抱著馬修以前最愛的小兔兔睡覺 這樣就能把我的氣味留給她 77 00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:10,398 等等,不行… 78 00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:12,942 嬰兒床裡面不能有填充動物玩具 可能會害她窒息 79 00:03:12,943 --> 00:03:14,777 那是你的最終測試 80 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:16,904 - 你通過了 - 耶 81 00:03:16,905 --> 00:03:19,407 這答案完全是 從我那性感的21歲屁屁裡蹦出來的 82 00:03:19,408 --> 00:03:21,784 好的,給我聽好,莎頓 83 00:03:21,785 --> 00:03:23,036 別忘了我 84 00:03:23,579 --> 00:03:25,037 我是說真的 85 00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:27,081 會有人在街上攔住我,然後問我 86 00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:28,916 - 是用什麼保濕產品 - 我相信 87 00:03:28,917 --> 00:03:30,209 妳知道我跟他們說什麼嗎? 88 00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:32,211 什麼也沒用,我天生麗質 89 00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:34,005 好,不要再想讓我分心了,好嗎? 90 00:03:34,006 --> 00:03:36,299 這是我第三次問妳的事 91 00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:38,926 而妳改變了話題,破紀錄了喔,恭喜妳 92 00:03:38,927 --> 00:03:40,094 謝謝 93 00:03:40,095 --> 00:03:41,929 我們把握最後兩分鐘 94 00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:43,931 馬克和唐娜為何會說妳烏雲罩頂? 95 00:03:43,932 --> 00:03:45,725 不知道啊 96 00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:47,852 我在上班的時候很少見到唐娜 97 00:03:47,853 --> 00:03:50,354 我是說,我們連週末也不一起玩了 98 00:03:50,355 --> 00:03:52,273 因為她忙著照顧孩子們 99 00:03:52,274 --> 00:03:53,608 妳一定很想她 100 00:03:53,609 --> 00:03:54,901 她是工作上的朋友 101 00:03:54,902 --> 00:03:57,320 而且她比我大了十歲吧 102 00:03:57,321 --> 00:03:59,405 我有個好麻吉,那個人至少可能有90歲了 103 00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:00,740 這沒什麼啦 104 00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:02,450 我生活中還有很多其他人 105 00:04:02,451 --> 00:04:05,036 嘿,我在這行的經驗很豐富 106 00:04:05,037 --> 00:04:06,370 妳在隱藏真正的痛苦 107 00:04:06,371 --> 00:04:10,791 我知道妳的工作 就是要刺探人的內心,但我沒事 108 00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:12,627 好,那妳都做什麼消遣呢? 109 00:04:12,628 --> 00:04:13,961 很多啊 110 00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:17,797 在老城區轉角處有一家蘋果酒吧 他們有冷知識問答遊戲 111 00:04:17,798 --> 00:04:21,345 那邊的人都很呆萌,不過… 112 00:04:22,346 --> 00:04:24,138 - 妳為何因此而難過? - 沒有 113 00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:25,556 我難過是因為時間到了 114 00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:28,267 而妳終於讓我可以在筆記本裡寫點東西 115 00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,561 妳看,“冷知識問答” 116 00:04:30,646 --> 00:04:31,979 我們應該還有點時間 117 00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:33,982 - 如果妳想多聊聊的話 - 掰囉 118 00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:41,198 討厭啦 119 00:04:43,367 --> 00:04:44,951 嘿,小加,怎麼了? 120 00:04:44,952 --> 00:04:47,411 佩陶爾博士本來明天 要來我的心理學課跟學生問答 121 00:04:47,412 --> 00:04:49,914 但她臨時放我鴿子,你可以來代班嗎? 122 00:04:49,915 --> 00:04:53,000 可以啊,不過我沒碰過 有人來求助還這麼生氣的 123 00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:55,336 抱歉,兄弟,瑪亞一直躲避我的問題 124 00:04:55,337 --> 00:04:56,796 你要不要出去外面說? 125 00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:57,922 嘿,我得掛了 126 00:04:57,923 --> 00:05:01,175 我沒有要炫耀啦,但我現在跟保羅在診所 127 00:05:01,176 --> 00:05:03,302 隨便啦,他終於找你了 128 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,305 我已經去過數不清次了,你好好享受吧 129 00:05:06,390 --> 00:05:07,391 好,再見 130 00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:11,352 你怎麼等這麼久 才找我當你的看診小夥伴? 131 00:05:11,353 --> 00:05:13,272 因為你稱之為“看診小夥伴” 132 00:05:13,939 --> 00:05:15,022 說得也是 133 00:05:15,023 --> 00:05:17,358 看來抗生素很有效 134 00:05:17,359 --> 00:05:18,442 尿道炎已經好了 135 00:05:18,443 --> 00:05:20,111 好耶,我就知道 136 00:05:20,112 --> 00:05:21,362 那麼,保羅 137 00:05:21,363 --> 00:05:26,617 我偶爾會有患者因為帕金森氏症 帶來的情緒負擔而困擾 138 00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:29,287 我可以介紹你們認識一下嗎? 139 00:05:29,288 --> 00:05:33,416 我覺得能跟 面對相同狀況的人聊聊會有幫助 140 00:05:33,417 --> 00:05:36,043 當然好,等一下,這… 141 00:05:36,044 --> 00:05:39,046 這是不是表示我可以回去工作了? 142 00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:40,674 我覺得沒理由不可以 143 00:05:44,636 --> 00:05:45,637 要一起嗎? 144 00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:49,016 我要 145 00:05:49,725 --> 00:05:51,935 - 好耶 - 好耶 146 00:06:17,085 --> 00:06:22,048 《誠實診療室》 147 00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:24,051 別忘了你的藥 148 00:06:26,595 --> 00:06:28,680 {\an8}嘆什麼氣啊? 149 00:06:30,432 --> 00:06:37,313 {\an8}只是這幾週以來 我們早上去散步,在床上吃早餐… 150 00:06:37,314 --> 00:06:38,981 {\an8}通常我不喜歡妳喝酒 151 00:06:38,982 --> 00:06:40,399 {\an8}- 我自己也不該喝 - 對 152 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,736 {\an8}但妳真的重新定義了 153 00:06:44,154 --> 00:06:46,280 含羞草“無底洞”的意義 154 00:06:46,281 --> 00:06:48,116 真的挺不錯的 155 00:06:48,659 --> 00:06:53,372 {\an8}你想要接下來的人生 都一起享受慢活的早晨嗎? 156 00:06:53,956 --> 00:06:55,332 算我一份 157 00:06:58,669 --> 00:07:00,628 {\an8}但我還得出門去看 158 00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:02,422 {\an8}四個得帕金森氏症的老頭 159 00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:04,341 所以這個… 160 00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:06,467 是妳的癖好? 161 00:07:06,468 --> 00:07:08,011 {\an8}沒錯,寶貝 162 00:07:11,390 --> 00:07:13,350 {\an8}妳做起來好看多了 163 00:07:13,892 --> 00:07:16,894 反正呢,就像你說的,我提出了要求 164 00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:20,147 {\an8}我怕死了,但我被升職了 165 00:07:20,148 --> 00:07:22,233 {\an8}華莉,真是太棒了 166 00:07:22,234 --> 00:07:23,776 {\an8}- 謝了 - 我真是以妳為榮 167 00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:25,695 {\an8}今天的結尾太棒了 168 00:07:25,696 --> 00:07:26,779 {\an8}不過呢,嘿 169 00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:30,658 {\an8}今天我希望妳離開時 別再玩那個“門把處大告解”的套路 170 00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:33,536 {\an8}我要妳就這樣走出去 不要突然又有新爆料 171 00:07:33,537 --> 00:07:35,956 {\an8}到下次診療前也都沒有狀況 172 00:07:39,751 --> 00:07:42,379 {\an8}這是平常的步調 173 00:07:46,842 --> 00:07:47,925 {\an8}嘿 174 00:07:47,926 --> 00:07:50,052 好,可是我很擔心第一天要穿什麼去上班 175 00:07:50,053 --> 00:07:51,929 而且我也很擔心,既然我現在有點權力 176 00:07:51,930 --> 00:07:53,431 搞不好會去摸人屁股,好,幹嘛? 177 00:07:53,432 --> 00:07:55,808 我等到走出門之後才開口說話喔 178 00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:58,644 而且我最擔心的還是我得公開講話 179 00:07:58,645 --> 00:07:59,770 我得要演講 180 00:07:59,771 --> 00:08:02,440 我知道大家都說演講時 只要幻想大家都只穿內衣就好,但我擔心 181 00:08:02,441 --> 00:08:04,108 那樣我會慾火中燒,當我慾火中燒 182 00:08:04,109 --> 00:08:06,152 - 華莉,嘿… - 我就會爆汗,而那樣… 183 00:08:06,153 --> 00:08:07,945 下週再講 184 00:08:07,946 --> 00:08:09,238 好,好啦… 185 00:08:09,239 --> 00:08:10,782 我之後傳簡訊給你 186 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:12,951 (蘭迪甜甜圈) 187 00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:16,537 不行,手別來碰 你這個長得像漢堡神偷的王八蛋 188 00:08:16,538 --> 00:08:17,705 這是要歡迎保羅回來的 189 00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:19,415 - 好喔 - 對 190 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:20,541 我一直在想瑪亞的事 191 00:08:20,542 --> 00:08:22,376 如果妳打破常規呢? 192 00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:24,128 不知道耶,約在診所以外的地方 193 00:08:24,129 --> 00:08:26,339 好,那不是我的風格,我是有界限感的人 194 00:08:26,340 --> 00:08:28,007 我不是在說要妳打壞規矩,小加 195 00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:29,300 我只是說超過一點就好 196 00:08:29,301 --> 00:08:32,053 就像是超速一咪咪而已 197 00:08:32,054 --> 00:08:34,263 就像在保羅抵達前吃一顆甜甜圈 198 00:08:34,264 --> 00:08:36,057 然後重新排列,這樣他就不會發現 199 00:08:36,058 --> 00:08:38,352 我不要,瑪亞那邊更不要 200 00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:43,064 王者回歸了 201 00:08:43,065 --> 00:08:45,566 - 謝天謝地 - 他來了 202 00:08:45,567 --> 00:08:46,902 嘿,我們幫你買了甜甜圈 203 00:08:48,278 --> 00:08:49,570 歡迎回來 204 00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:51,822 - 謝謝 - 好棒喔,好,好吧 205 00:08:51,823 --> 00:08:53,783 祝你今天愉快,吉米要去我的課堂 206 00:08:53,784 --> 00:08:56,160 當客座講師,所以我們要出去了 207 00:08:56,161 --> 00:08:57,662 - 再見,兄弟 - 好,等一下 208 00:08:57,663 --> 00:08:59,080 - 你們倆都要走了? - 對 209 00:08:59,081 --> 00:09:00,540 你還好嗎? 210 00:09:00,541 --> 00:09:04,753 只是…畢竟我第一天回來上班 211 00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:06,671 有點生疏 212 00:09:06,672 --> 00:09:09,090 - 靠 - 我不用去沒關係 213 00:09:09,091 --> 00:09:11,509 我也許可以下週 再去小加的課堂講課,或是… 214 00:09:11,510 --> 00:09:15,680 耍到你們了,掰啦,笨蛋們,我好得很 215 00:09:15,681 --> 00:09:17,975 “我也許可以下週再去小加的課堂” 216 00:09:19,685 --> 00:09:21,227 她怎麼還是發紅又尖叫? 217 00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:24,146 - 寶貝女兒,怎麼了? - 妳想怎樣呢? 218 00:09:24,147 --> 00:09:25,523 妳要100美金嗎? 219 00:09:25,524 --> 00:09:26,774 好耶,要多一點 220 00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,484 - 我給妳一千 - 好耶 221 00:09:28,485 --> 00:09:29,944 真搞笑 222 00:09:29,945 --> 00:09:31,028 其實滿病態的 223 00:09:31,029 --> 00:09:33,322 我很擔心妳,但很搞笑 224 00:09:33,323 --> 00:09:34,658 妳看 225 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:36,410 幫她腳踏車運動 226 00:09:37,494 --> 00:09:39,203 - 怎麼回事啊? - 是媞亞嗎? 227 00:09:39,204 --> 00:09:40,371 說什麼鬼啊? 228 00:09:40,372 --> 00:09:42,915 她脹氣,幫她腳踏車運動 229 00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:45,001 - 幫她做騎腳踏車的動作 - 像騎腳踏車那樣 230 00:09:45,002 --> 00:09:46,127 沒錯…好耶 231 00:09:46,128 --> 00:09:47,628 我們在騎腳踏車,妳在… 232 00:09:47,629 --> 00:09:49,881 我的…這屁放得好啊 233 00:09:49,882 --> 00:09:51,008 等等 234 00:09:52,384 --> 00:09:53,801 非常感謝妳 235 00:09:53,802 --> 00:09:55,845 真該死,莉茲,妳還說這是馬修的小兔兔 236 00:09:55,846 --> 00:09:57,805 冷靜啦,你很愛上鏡頭的 237 00:09:57,806 --> 00:09:59,557 沒錯,把影片傳給我 238 00:09:59,558 --> 00:10:00,642 再見,莉茲 239 00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:03,102 剛剛還挺好玩的 240 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:05,563 嘿,我們有客人喔 241 00:10:05,564 --> 00:10:07,481 - 酷一點 - 我們很酷了 242 00:10:07,482 --> 00:10:10,610 瑪莉索,他們是德瑞克、莉茲和艾莉絲 243 00:10:10,611 --> 00:10:12,987 真是驚喜啊 244 00:10:12,988 --> 00:10:14,989 別鬧了,兄弟,你傳了超多簡訊給我 245 00:10:14,990 --> 00:10:16,616 “我知道她在那裡,我想見她” 246 00:10:16,617 --> 00:10:18,034 啥?沒有啦 247 00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:22,830 尚恩終於帶女生回家 德瑞克有點興奮過頭了 248 00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:24,165 我說清楚喔 249 00:10:24,166 --> 00:10:28,419 他會從我們的陽台觀察你們來來去去 250 00:10:28,420 --> 00:10:30,004 - 他會怎樣? - 別擔心 251 00:10:30,005 --> 00:10:31,255 他看不到 252 00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:32,798 池畔小屋裡的狀況 253 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:35,593 尚恩說你沖的咖啡很讚 254 00:10:35,594 --> 00:10:38,554 而且他一直在說那個天堂般的馬桶 255 00:10:38,555 --> 00:10:41,182 - 但我覺得他說得太超過了 - 絕對不可能超過 256 00:10:41,183 --> 00:10:44,685 妳和妳的屁屁是不會失望的 257 00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:47,730 - 老公,別聊人家的屁屁 - 我沒有要描述 258 00:10:47,731 --> 00:10:49,775 只是在說屁屁會很爽 259 00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:53,111 是威爾 260 00:10:53,695 --> 00:10:56,322 - 嘿,兒子,怎麼了? - 這真是太離譜了 261 00:10:56,323 --> 00:10:57,740 我不要繼續這樣,好嗎? 262 00:10:57,741 --> 00:10:59,909 好,說慢點,慢慢…好 263 00:10:59,910 --> 00:11:01,827 馬修不能繼續待在這裡 264 00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:04,205 我家亂成一團 而且佩頓也不過來這裡睡了 265 00:11:04,206 --> 00:11:05,748 - 有佩頓這個人? - 誰是佩頓? 266 00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:06,874 好了啦 267 00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:09,211 請她來喝杯咖啡,享受馬桶 268 00:11:09,711 --> 00:11:11,379 就這樣啊,妳過氣了 269 00:11:11,380 --> 00:11:14,131 我不知道該怎麼說得優雅 但我得去試試那個馬桶 270 00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:16,175 走過去,在左手邊 271 00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:18,970 我們會想辦法,兒子,好嗎? 272 00:11:18,971 --> 00:11:20,429 - 愛你 - 愛你 273 00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:21,597 好,我也愛你們 274 00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,559 我們要拿這孩子怎麼辦啊? 275 00:11:24,142 --> 00:11:28,145 - 他媽的,它會幫你暖屁屁? - 沒錯 276 00:11:28,146 --> 00:11:30,898 她現在會常常想要來這裡過夜了 277 00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,401 昨晚我應該已經確保了這一點 278 00:11:33,777 --> 00:11:35,444 你覺得那樣說很自豪嗎? 279 00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:37,865 - 現在不覺得了 - 你認真? 280 00:11:38,824 --> 00:11:41,243 自豪的人是他,我只是站在這裡耶 281 00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:44,454 嗨,我是小加的得意門生凱莎 282 00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:47,957 不知道你能不能幫我寫一封推薦信? 283 00:11:47,958 --> 00:11:49,208 妳問了每一個客座講師 284 00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,919 - 妳已經有23封推薦信了 - 哇 285 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,714 - 我喜歡妳喔,凱莎 - 24封了 286 00:11:54,298 --> 00:11:56,215 - 妳不是也有那件毛衣嗎? - 對 287 00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:59,344 我去她家,覺得好冷,所以就偷來穿了 288 00:12:00,512 --> 00:12:02,388 我很確定她是在對我 用《單身黑人女性》那招 289 00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:04,056 老實說,我是挺享受的 290 00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:05,141 好 291 00:12:05,142 --> 00:12:06,434 沒啦,我只是很訝異 292 00:12:06,435 --> 00:12:09,562 那個有界限感的人竟然讓凱莎去自己家 293 00:12:09,563 --> 00:12:11,397 妳這個有界限感的爛妹子 294 00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:12,899 - 我聽到了,我知道,聽起來很冒犯 - 噁 295 00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:14,483 - 抱歉 - 凱莎是個學生 296 00:12:14,484 --> 00:12:15,735 不是像瑪亞那樣的患者 297 00:12:15,736 --> 00:12:17,278 你幹嘛拿她來施壓我? 298 00:12:17,279 --> 00:12:19,739 小加,妳跟我一直都有點小競爭 299 00:12:19,740 --> 00:12:21,532 但我覺得這也許就是妳如此抗拒的原因 300 00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:23,409 妳怕“吉式療法”搞不好真的有用 301 00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:26,371 因為跟妳說,“加式療法”沒用 302 00:12:27,539 --> 00:12:28,540 好,夠了 303 00:12:29,041 --> 00:12:30,042 要來囉 304 00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:33,377 各位同學,計畫改變 305 00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:37,256 我本來要請我同事萊爾德博士 306 00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:40,843 跟大家聊聊臨床環境下的認知重建 307 00:12:40,844 --> 00:12:45,765 但是呢,我想改成請他 為一個“新穎”的技巧辯護 308 00:12:45,766 --> 00:12:48,894 他還自大地將其技巧以自己的名字命名 309 00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:51,938 歡迎萊爾德“博士” 310 00:12:51,939 --> 00:12:53,273 來吧 311 00:12:53,857 --> 00:12:55,067 吉式療法 312 00:12:56,068 --> 00:12:59,570 就像重力、iPod、果凍一樣 313 00:12:59,571 --> 00:13:02,574 這些原本都是激進的想法,直到有人… 314 00:13:05,202 --> 00:13:06,370 勇敢地去夢想 315 00:13:07,329 --> 00:13:08,872 好的,這位年輕的夢想家 316 00:13:09,540 --> 00:13:12,084 - 已經有“吉式療法”這個詞了嗎? - 這就是我愛它的原因 317 00:13:12,751 --> 00:13:14,711 我在“吉”的是人的內心 318 00:13:15,754 --> 00:13:17,673 你幹嘛做筆記?他在胡說八道耶 319 00:13:19,550 --> 00:13:21,009 今天談得很棒 320 00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:27,850 但以後千萬別再說 “我都是為了錢”這種話 321 00:13:28,517 --> 00:13:30,226 會讓我有點討厭你 322 00:13:30,227 --> 00:13:32,187 - 很高興你回來了 - 謝謝 323 00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:36,357 不要 324 00:13:36,358 --> 00:13:37,693 要 325 00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:43,990 像馬修這樣的孩子,當妳不再寵著他 326 00:13:43,991 --> 00:13:47,994 開始要求他獨立時,他會很難適應 327 00:13:47,995 --> 00:13:52,123 但重點在於我不是妳的治療師 328 00:13:52,124 --> 00:13:55,126 好啊,沒關係,虧的是你 329 00:13:55,127 --> 00:13:57,378 但你會幫我,你知道為何嗎? 330 00:13:57,379 --> 00:13:59,255 因為我如果不幫,妳就要對我開槍? 331 00:13:59,256 --> 00:14:00,257 不是 332 00:14:01,300 --> 00:14:03,886 因為我要給你這個 333 00:14:04,469 --> 00:14:07,805 - 這是在幹嘛? - 你很清楚那是什麼東西 334 00:14:07,806 --> 00:14:12,895 你是這世界上少數幾個 比我還怕表現出脆弱的人 335 00:14:13,562 --> 00:14:15,146 但沒辦法 336 00:14:15,147 --> 00:14:18,442 我覺得你真的很有智慧 又很有啟發性,保羅 337 00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:24,156 我應該只是想要說,我真的很感激 338 00:14:24,740 --> 00:14:27,200 而且我愛你 339 00:14:27,201 --> 00:14:29,410 你不需要回應我 340 00:14:29,411 --> 00:14:31,580 但如果你沒回應,我這輩子都會批判你 341 00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:33,498 我無所謂 342 00:14:37,794 --> 00:14:39,670 我喜歡它亮晶晶的 343 00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:41,256 對啊,這顆很棒 344 00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:46,637 我愛妳 345 00:14:47,554 --> 00:14:49,096 我要去昭告天下,你說你愛我 346 00:14:49,097 --> 00:14:50,973 絕對沒人會相信妳啦 347 00:14:50,974 --> 00:14:53,060 跟我說我該拿我的小孩怎麼辦啦 348 00:14:53,685 --> 00:14:57,523 我們原本希望把你踢出家門之後 你能自己找到辦法 349 00:14:58,023 --> 00:15:00,775 - 但你沒有 - 對,你沒有 350 00:15:00,776 --> 00:15:01,902 真是幫了大忙 351 00:15:02,819 --> 00:15:07,365 不過幸好,我有個新的石頭好朋友 他說我們能幫助你 352 00:15:07,366 --> 00:15:10,535 - 但我們不能代替你去做 - 對 353 00:15:10,536 --> 00:15:12,454 這些牆以前有發霉,不過現在已經沒了 354 00:15:13,163 --> 00:15:14,997 你可以待在這裡,不用付房租 355 00:15:14,998 --> 00:15:18,251 只要你工作,我們會確保你不會挨餓 356 00:15:18,252 --> 00:15:20,336 我說的是所有的工作 357 00:15:20,337 --> 00:15:23,381 貼磁磚、油漆、裝新的石膏板 358 00:15:23,382 --> 00:15:24,715 我不會做那些事啦 359 00:15:24,716 --> 00:15:26,969 YouTube教授就是為此而生的 360 00:15:28,387 --> 00:15:29,470 不要… 361 00:15:29,471 --> 00:15:31,347 不要吃我們窮鬼兒子的糖果 362 00:15:31,348 --> 00:15:34,350 妳知道我一嚴厲起來血糖就會下降 363 00:15:34,351 --> 00:15:35,352 你沒事啦 364 00:15:36,478 --> 00:15:39,188 好了,我要去取我拿去修改的外套 365 00:15:39,189 --> 00:15:41,232 妳不會知道我一路上都吃了什麼 366 00:15:41,233 --> 00:15:42,859 - 我會 - 媽,這樣太爛了 367 00:15:42,860 --> 00:15:44,902 等你找到工作就結束了 368 00:15:44,903 --> 00:15:46,612 我帶你去看房間 369 00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:49,407 你要早起應該不會有問題 370 00:15:49,408 --> 00:15:51,450 因為我把所有窗戶的窗簾都拆了 371 00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:52,785 我喜歡窗簾 372 00:15:52,786 --> 00:15:53,953 好喔,沒辦法 373 00:15:53,954 --> 00:15:55,788 那麼,是什麼讓你 374 00:15:55,789 --> 00:15:59,334 從傳統的認知行為治療法跳到 不顧後果地介入客戶的生活? 375 00:16:00,544 --> 00:16:01,545 首先呢 376 00:16:03,338 --> 00:16:05,631 那是為了我自己 我當時正在經歷一些事情 377 00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:08,802 但現在,當患者一開始找上我的時候 378 00:16:09,678 --> 00:16:11,388 通常都很無助 379 00:16:12,306 --> 00:16:14,348 如果我能打破人與人的傳統界線 380 00:16:14,349 --> 00:16:17,518 讓他們瞭解我願意幫他們到什麼程度 381 00:16:17,519 --> 00:16:22,274 說實話,我有時候能看到 他們的希望慢慢恢復 382 00:16:24,109 --> 00:16:25,443 - 我贏了 - 最好是 383 00:16:25,444 --> 00:16:27,862 不好意思,但你在做的似乎是人生教練 384 00:16:27,863 --> 00:16:29,740 是的,凱莎,來為凱莎彈指吧 385 00:16:30,699 --> 00:16:32,617 這是怎樣?這樣是在幹嘛? 386 00:16:32,618 --> 00:16:35,411 彈指啊,這樣做代表“很棒,女王” 就是這意思 387 00:16:35,412 --> 00:16:37,663 如果不遵守行為準則的話 388 00:16:37,664 --> 00:16:39,832 那你要怎麼不去越界太多呢? 389 00:16:39,833 --> 00:16:41,626 我相信自己的道德指南針 390 00:16:41,627 --> 00:16:43,461 說說你讓患者脫到只剩白色緊身內褲 391 00:16:43,462 --> 00:16:45,171 和你朋友一起游泳的那次 392 00:16:45,172 --> 00:16:47,381 這措辭不公平,而妳很清楚 393 00:16:47,382 --> 00:16:50,176 等等,你是不是有個客戶 把她的老公推下山? 394 00:16:50,177 --> 00:16:51,511 那只是山丘 395 00:16:51,512 --> 00:16:54,180 是個很高、很陡的山丘 396 00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:55,515 那次的結果不太好 397 00:16:55,516 --> 00:16:57,850 不過,自那之後我做了很多自我反思 398 00:16:57,851 --> 00:17:01,854 坦白說,我發現那傢伙真的是個王八蛋 399 00:17:01,855 --> 00:17:04,147 - 我的天啊 - 糟糕 400 00:17:04,148 --> 00:17:08,027 真是一團糟,老實說 我很同情你的客戶們 401 00:17:08,028 --> 00:17:11,448 - 我可以回應這題嗎? - 不行,不可以,她只是一般學生 402 00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:14,491 我是吉米的一個患者 403 00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:17,787 - 我有想過會這樣 - 好嗎?我患有強迫症 404 00:17:17,788 --> 00:17:19,497 在我認識吉米之前 405 00:17:19,498 --> 00:17:22,500 我會屏住呼吸,避免發生不好的事 406 00:17:22,501 --> 00:17:25,252 我的內層衣物跟外層衣物得分得很清楚 407 00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:28,798 但現在,我偶爾會跟一隻狗狗玩 408 00:17:28,799 --> 00:17:32,260 而且我已經不再屏住呼吸 我已經六個月沒昏倒了 409 00:17:32,261 --> 00:17:34,303 別誤會,我還是有其他問題要解決 410 00:17:34,304 --> 00:17:35,639 就像我害怕對大眾說話 411 00:17:36,223 --> 00:17:38,599 吉米帶我來這裡練習 而我心想他真是瘋了… 412 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,476 可是,天啊,這是公眾場合,我在說話 413 00:17:40,477 --> 00:17:42,646 - 我在對大眾說話耶 - 一點也沒錯 414 00:17:43,230 --> 00:17:44,480 謝謝大家 415 00:17:44,481 --> 00:17:48,484 這就是我願冒險去做的 416 00:17:48,485 --> 00:17:50,778 還有哪個治療治療師會跑到我家 417 00:17:50,779 --> 00:17:52,989 坐在我床上,跟我說我很棒? 418 00:17:52,990 --> 00:17:54,824 - 什麼? - 那才不是床 419 00:17:54,825 --> 00:17:56,784 不是…那是可以變成床的沙發 420 00:17:56,785 --> 00:17:58,202 但當時那是沙發 421 00:17:58,203 --> 00:18:00,872 好的,所以,你們聽到了 422 00:18:00,873 --> 00:18:03,749 可以的話,我想要用 《星際戰警》的閃光筆 423 00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:06,419 把你們的記憶都消除掉 424 00:18:06,420 --> 00:18:08,505 我們來假裝根本沒上過這堂課吧 425 00:18:11,091 --> 00:18:12,176 下課 426 00:18:13,218 --> 00:18:16,512 這裡挺有趣的…有嗑藥風 427 00:18:16,513 --> 00:18:18,848 總之呢,康納要我們來拿回他的運動衫 428 00:18:18,849 --> 00:18:20,391 跟康納說 429 00:18:20,392 --> 00:18:24,061 他那件該死的2012年 洛杉磯國王隊史丹利盃冠軍帽T不在我這 430 00:18:24,062 --> 00:18:26,647 你穿的那件運動衫上面就印著那些字 431 00:18:26,648 --> 00:18:27,649 靠 432 00:18:30,110 --> 00:18:31,569 妳們想來點大麻軟糖嗎? 433 00:18:31,570 --> 00:18:33,196 吃了會嗨慘喔 434 00:18:33,197 --> 00:18:36,533 好,我想要嗨翻天,我要六顆 435 00:18:37,826 --> 00:18:40,370 去哪了?我有一大包耶 436 00:18:44,708 --> 00:18:45,792 慘了 437 00:19:06,522 --> 00:19:09,650 兄弟,這話不好開口 438 00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:12,652 你的老二被切掉了 439 00:19:12,653 --> 00:19:14,655 先生,都還好嗎? 440 00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:19,076 很好,但你們也許需要叫救護車 441 00:19:19,576 --> 00:19:20,786 我被下毒了 442 00:19:21,411 --> 00:19:23,539 我感覺有點快死掉了 443 00:19:27,376 --> 00:19:29,086 只是有點快死掉了 444 00:19:29,962 --> 00:19:32,256 還有,莉茲,最後一則訊息 445 00:19:32,756 --> 00:19:36,218 聽我說,很對不起 我從來沒找到過那把剪刀 446 00:19:36,718 --> 00:19:39,220 我沒找到…剪… 447 00:19:39,221 --> 00:19:41,848 總之呢,而且我要死掉了 448 00:19:41,849 --> 00:19:45,101 但我不想要妳等太久才找到第二春 449 00:19:45,102 --> 00:19:48,020 不過差不多等個八年吧 450 00:19:48,021 --> 00:19:49,690 好,永別囉 451 00:19:50,315 --> 00:19:51,984 我是妳老公,德瑞克 452 00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:56,321 (德瑞克) 453 00:19:59,825 --> 00:20:02,243 - 德瑞克 - 幹得好啊,王八蛋 454 00:20:02,244 --> 00:20:03,537 你活得比我久 455 00:20:04,162 --> 00:20:05,747 但你還是永遠都把不到她 456 00:20:06,331 --> 00:20:07,498 你還好嗎? 457 00:20:07,499 --> 00:20:11,961 是啊,我很好,兩個辛辛那提,混帳東西 458 00:20:11,962 --> 00:20:15,423 好,我當然不會讓他們捉到莎頓 459 00:20:15,424 --> 00:20:19,343 但你覺得是誰想要殺死你跟我的寶寶? 460 00:20:19,344 --> 00:20:20,971 他們想要殺死可愛的人? 461 00:20:21,638 --> 00:20:23,098 對啊,他們來捉我了 462 00:20:23,849 --> 00:20:25,142 很有可能喔 463 00:20:25,642 --> 00:20:28,227 我正在受攻擊,我被攻擊了 464 00:20:28,228 --> 00:20:29,353 布萊恩,想想辦法 465 00:20:29,354 --> 00:20:31,690 - 別碰… - 好,老哥 466 00:20:32,274 --> 00:20:33,524 - 坐下 - 等一下 467 00:20:33,525 --> 00:20:35,109 等我一下喔 468 00:20:35,110 --> 00:20:36,904 我想我嚇跑他了,他坐下了 469 00:20:37,946 --> 00:20:39,906 莉茲,我知道妳在聽 470 00:20:39,907 --> 00:20:42,284 去拿妳的手機,德瑞克要被送去醫院了 471 00:20:45,287 --> 00:20:46,662 靠 472 00:20:46,663 --> 00:20:51,042 那麼,你跟瑪莉索 是砲友以上,戀人未滿的關係嗎? 473 00:20:51,043 --> 00:20:53,420 還是你們打算低調公開? 474 00:20:54,087 --> 00:20:55,964 看吧,你說話的時候我會聽 475 00:20:56,632 --> 00:20:59,592 我們在一起很開心,瑪莉索很棒啊 476 00:20:59,593 --> 00:21:01,677 她其實在邁阿密混得很好 477 00:21:01,678 --> 00:21:04,805 但她爸生病了,所以她回家來陪爸爸 478 00:21:04,806 --> 00:21:06,098 我尊重這一點 479 00:21:06,099 --> 00:21:08,268 有什麼比陪伴家人還要重要的? 480 00:21:09,436 --> 00:21:10,896 沒有異議 481 00:21:12,105 --> 00:21:13,689 這次診療快結束了 482 00:21:13,690 --> 00:21:16,485 你要坐在那裡繼續炫耀 還是你有問題要聊? 483 00:21:17,861 --> 00:21:19,321 她一點也沒變 484 00:21:20,739 --> 00:21:23,825 有點瘋、風趣、什麼都願意挑戰 485 00:21:24,910 --> 00:21:26,328 我以前也是那樣 486 00:21:27,412 --> 00:21:30,081 但如果她發現我已經不是那樣的人了呢? 487 00:21:30,082 --> 00:21:35,336 所以,你是為幻想中未來的事在煩惱? 488 00:21:35,337 --> 00:21:37,548 抱歉,引不起我的興趣 489 00:21:38,382 --> 00:21:42,719 我們不如專心思考 你現在的狀況竟然這麼好 490 00:21:43,220 --> 00:21:45,471 因為我們在聊感情困擾耶 491 00:21:45,472 --> 00:21:47,349 對,有點讚,對吧? 492 00:21:48,642 --> 00:21:50,269 拜託,沒那麼糟啦 493 00:21:51,436 --> 00:21:53,229 而且你知道我討厭你賣慘 494 00:21:53,230 --> 00:21:55,940 我在幫妳的忙,小加,但妳設計我 495 00:21:55,941 --> 00:21:57,733 真的很壞 496 00:21:57,734 --> 00:22:00,653 好啊,那你也沒先問我的感覺 就去跟路易斯當朋友啊 497 00:22:00,654 --> 00:22:02,238 現在?妳現在要提這件事? 498 00:22:02,239 --> 00:22:03,823 對,我覺得我需要現在提 499 00:22:03,824 --> 00:22:06,576 你想吃披薩就點披薩 500 00:22:06,577 --> 00:22:08,411 而且,對,我會 501 00:22:08,412 --> 00:22:10,122 我會幫你打給FBI 502 00:22:10,998 --> 00:22:12,082 我得掛了 503 00:22:12,791 --> 00:22:14,375 德瑞克會打給你們喔 504 00:22:14,376 --> 00:22:15,419 他超嗨的 505 00:22:16,044 --> 00:22:17,670 小加,我知道 506 00:22:17,671 --> 00:22:19,797 我有時會咄咄逼人,很抱歉 507 00:22:19,798 --> 00:22:21,382 但我是真的想幫妳 508 00:22:21,383 --> 00:22:22,758 該死 509 00:22:22,759 --> 00:22:25,678 我沒有別的意思 我只是不接受別人對我患者的建議 510 00:22:25,679 --> 00:22:27,472 妳給我的最後一則簡訊說 511 00:22:27,973 --> 00:22:30,391 “不知道你能不能給我一點 關於我患者的建議?” 512 00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:32,435 該死,保羅,我差點就能脫身 513 00:22:32,436 --> 00:22:34,770 - 妳為何騙我? - 我沒有騙你 514 00:22:34,771 --> 00:22:36,981 - 妳對我有什麼意見? - 你為何要賣慘? 515 00:22:36,982 --> 00:22:39,443 - 兩位 - 嘿,保羅,賽克斯醫生叫我來的 516 00:22:40,319 --> 00:22:42,069 抱歉打擾,這看起來應該是 517 00:22:42,070 --> 00:22:44,865 為了氣自己長太高的人 所辦的團體治療吧 518 00:22:45,365 --> 00:22:46,574 他們是醫生啦 519 00:22:46,575 --> 00:22:48,285 那還真讓人有信心 520 00:22:48,785 --> 00:22:50,829 - 幸會 - 我也是 521 00:22:52,164 --> 00:22:53,749 我理解妳對我失去了信任 522 00:22:55,209 --> 00:22:56,210 換成是我也會 523 00:22:57,461 --> 00:22:58,795 但我在努力向前邁進 524 00:22:59,296 --> 00:23:01,715 我真的希望妳能找到重新信任我的方法 525 00:23:03,258 --> 00:23:05,134 承認吧,媞亞死後,妳就不信任我了 526 00:23:05,135 --> 00:23:06,720 不是自從媞亞死後 527 00:23:07,638 --> 00:23:10,681 是在那三個月後 我的患者沒來約好的診療 528 00:23:10,682 --> 00:23:12,934 然後我發現你們兩個在停車場嗑藥 529 00:23:12,935 --> 00:23:14,520 - 你記得嗎? - 我當然記得 530 00:23:16,021 --> 00:23:17,104 不,我不記得 531 00:23:17,105 --> 00:23:20,483 如果我花太久才搭上 “吉米回歸”列車的話,很抱歉 532 00:23:20,484 --> 00:23:22,068 媞亞就像我親姊妹 533 00:23:22,069 --> 00:23:25,489 老兄,你帶性工作者進她家 534 00:23:26,031 --> 00:23:27,532 你跟她的超辣閨蜜上床 535 00:23:27,533 --> 00:23:28,534 那是妳出手的耶 536 00:23:29,034 --> 00:23:30,660 小加,如果是妳主動就不能算 537 00:23:30,661 --> 00:23:31,870 可以算啦 538 00:23:33,914 --> 00:23:34,915 我懂 539 00:23:35,791 --> 00:23:37,459 我是說,我真的懂,我懂 540 00:23:41,755 --> 00:23:43,506 妳對瑪亞的做法沒用 541 00:23:43,507 --> 00:23:44,966 妳得做些改變 542 00:23:44,967 --> 00:23:47,386 別因為我有多爛,而誤了幫助她的機會 543 00:23:52,891 --> 00:23:54,268 所以我成了幻覺 544 00:23:55,060 --> 00:23:57,728 但我只是在吃蛋糕 沒做什麼很酷的事嗎? 545 00:23:57,729 --> 00:23:58,772 那蛋糕挺讚的 546 00:24:00,023 --> 00:24:01,607 那麼,你有什麼煩惱? 547 00:24:01,608 --> 00:24:03,109 我算是挺樂觀的人 548 00:24:03,110 --> 00:24:05,445 不過差不多一年會有一次碰上瓶頸 549 00:24:06,864 --> 00:24:10,741 而且真的很難受 550 00:24:10,742 --> 00:24:13,203 也很不公平 551 00:24:14,621 --> 00:24:15,747 還很無聊 552 00:24:16,373 --> 00:24:18,750 一個人一年能做多少次發聲練習? 553 00:24:26,341 --> 00:24:28,718 對,我也是超討厭那個 554 00:24:28,719 --> 00:24:30,136 但到了某個時候 555 00:24:30,137 --> 00:24:32,389 我會去找個能幫助我繼續奮鬥下去的人 556 00:24:33,182 --> 00:24:34,265 今年就是你 557 00:24:34,266 --> 00:24:35,267 我真走運啊 558 00:24:36,101 --> 00:24:38,562 - 但我不要 - 好,沒關係 559 00:24:39,563 --> 00:24:40,813 有哪扇窗是開著的嗎? 560 00:24:40,814 --> 00:24:44,859 你的命運得靠你自己決定 但我能幫助你去搞清楚 561 00:24:44,860 --> 00:24:48,697 用我稱之為“靈場”的東西 562 00:24:49,281 --> 00:24:50,365 閉上眼睛 563 00:24:52,326 --> 00:24:53,826 想像一下 564 00:24:53,827 --> 00:24:59,416 一團神祕的智慧與能量雲 565 00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:01,292 聽起來有點蠢 566 00:25:01,293 --> 00:25:02,336 不蠢 567 00:25:03,045 --> 00:25:05,338 - 有一點蠢 - 好,是有一點蠢 568 00:25:05,339 --> 00:25:06,590 閉上眼睛 569 00:25:07,257 --> 00:25:11,219 我要你走進一股溫暖的能量中 570 00:25:11,220 --> 00:25:12,971 讓它籠罩著你 571 00:25:13,472 --> 00:25:17,226 然後說:“我要答案,我知道你有” 572 00:25:17,768 --> 00:25:20,479 接著靜靜聆聽 573 00:25:20,979 --> 00:25:22,231 我在做了,你有在做嗎? 574 00:25:23,482 --> 00:25:24,816 好,我會做 575 00:25:28,570 --> 00:25:30,238 我當然要來 576 00:25:30,239 --> 00:25:32,282 我想儘可能多陪陪你 577 00:25:32,950 --> 00:25:36,662 你想要接下來的人生 都一起享受慢活的早晨嗎? 578 00:25:38,288 --> 00:25:39,705 算我一份 579 00:25:39,706 --> 00:25:42,500 或許比較好的想法是 專心思索自己有多感激 580 00:25:42,501 --> 00:25:44,336 自己能從事這工作這麼久 581 00:25:46,547 --> 00:25:48,715 有什麼比陪伴家人還要重要的? 582 00:25:51,635 --> 00:25:52,719 好,我搞定了 583 00:25:56,348 --> 00:25:58,016 我只看到上週日 584 00:25:58,809 --> 00:26:00,852 我覺得狀況好糟,爬不起來 585 00:26:00,853 --> 00:26:06,275 然後我老婆、我女兒跟我 586 00:26:07,317 --> 00:26:09,194 就一起在床上吃櫻桃口味冰淇淋 587 00:26:11,113 --> 00:26:12,573 她用湯匙餵我吃 588 00:26:14,241 --> 00:26:19,413 沒錯,人生中還有很多事 比被美女餵冰淇淋更糟糕呢 589 00:26:22,291 --> 00:26:26,712 那也許我回家的路上會去喝個幾杯 590 00:26:28,797 --> 00:26:29,882 好答案 591 00:26:30,382 --> 00:26:31,383 謝了 592 00:26:33,802 --> 00:26:35,012 我們明年見囉 593 00:26:36,221 --> 00:26:37,222 看情況吧 594 00:26:40,767 --> 00:26:41,768 好答案 595 00:26:43,478 --> 00:26:45,314 天堂的味道超臭的 596 00:26:45,939 --> 00:26:48,774 再說一次,你沒死 597 00:26:48,775 --> 00:26:50,151 這裡是醫院 598 00:26:50,152 --> 00:26:51,903 大家都跟他說他沒死掉 599 00:26:51,904 --> 00:26:53,530 - 你沒死掉,爸 - 你還活著 600 00:26:56,116 --> 00:26:57,825 - 別鬧 - 抱歉 601 00:26:57,826 --> 00:26:59,243 哇,真像《歡樂滿屋》呢 602 00:26:59,244 --> 00:27:01,078 - 很好看耶 - 對啊 603 00:27:01,079 --> 00:27:03,456 記得傑西叔叔嗎?他長得好像貓王喔 604 00:27:03,457 --> 00:27:05,334 - 對啊 - 是啊,我記得,對,大家都記得 605 00:27:05,959 --> 00:27:07,336 直接跟我們說吧,醫生 606 00:27:08,253 --> 00:27:11,381 - 他是不是再也嗨不起來了? - 他會沒事的 607 00:27:11,924 --> 00:27:14,550 他的血液檢查確實顯示出輕微的心臟異常 608 00:27:14,551 --> 00:27:15,843 想想辦法啊 609 00:27:15,844 --> 00:27:16,929 哈,那地方還管用呢 610 00:27:17,513 --> 00:27:21,891 但可能是因為他攝入了 650毫克的四氫大麻酚 611 00:27:21,892 --> 00:27:23,142 好喔 612 00:27:23,143 --> 00:27:24,435 你整包都吃了? 613 00:27:24,436 --> 00:27:25,520 幹得好喔,老兄 614 00:27:25,521 --> 00:27:28,065 我們之後會請他回心臟科做後續追蹤 615 00:27:28,649 --> 00:27:31,901 但在此同時,只要他能走路 你們就能帶他回家了 616 00:27:31,902 --> 00:27:34,028 - 謝謝 - 不客氣 617 00:27:34,029 --> 00:27:36,572 割掉那個人老二的傢伙有被捉到嗎? 618 00:27:36,573 --> 00:27:38,866 - 誰的老二? - 你還活著 619 00:27:38,867 --> 00:27:40,034 大家都愛你 620 00:27:40,035 --> 00:27:42,370 小加打來了,康納也打來了 621 00:27:42,371 --> 00:27:43,496 連保羅都打來了 622 00:27:43,497 --> 00:27:45,666 靠,我得打給馬修 623 00:27:46,959 --> 00:27:48,752 - 不用了啦 - 什麼? 624 00:27:50,295 --> 00:27:51,380 他知道啦 625 00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:53,757 我跟他說了,抱歉 626 00:27:56,009 --> 00:27:57,134 太好了,謝了 627 00:27:57,135 --> 00:27:58,971 - 謝謝妳跟他說 - 不客氣 628 00:27:59,638 --> 00:28:01,723 (冷知識問答) 629 00:28:08,021 --> 00:28:10,731 哇,嘿,瑪亞,是怎樣啊? 630 00:28:10,732 --> 00:28:13,110 - 小加 - 對啊,太巧了吧 631 00:28:14,319 --> 00:28:15,695 其實一點也不巧 632 00:28:15,696 --> 00:28:17,572 妳說妳要去老城區的一間蘋果酒吧 633 00:28:17,573 --> 00:28:19,991 我查了,看到就只有一家 634 00:28:19,992 --> 00:28:22,160 但現在聽起來彷彿我在跟騷妳 635 00:28:23,370 --> 00:28:24,997 我只是想確定妳沒事 636 00:28:25,581 --> 00:28:27,957 如果妳想待下來 那妳就得加入我的冷知識問答隊 637 00:28:27,958 --> 00:28:29,041 今晚只有我一個人 638 00:28:29,042 --> 00:28:30,334 好啊,主題是什麼? 639 00:28:30,335 --> 00:28:32,336 - 《魔戒》 - 靠 640 00:28:32,337 --> 00:28:34,213 妹子,這裡就要血流成河了 641 00:28:34,214 --> 00:28:35,548 - 真的嗎? - 對呀 642 00:28:35,549 --> 00:28:39,010 - 哈比人山姆要發威去揍人囉 - 好喔,看來妳很懂 643 00:28:39,011 --> 00:28:40,303 妳根本不知道我有多懂 644 00:28:40,304 --> 00:28:41,638 可以再來一杯這個嗎? 645 00:28:42,222 --> 00:28:44,932 真是不敢相信妳竟然知道亞拉岡那把 646 00:28:44,933 --> 00:28:47,643 用納希爾聖劍碎片重新鑄造的劍 647 00:28:47,644 --> 00:28:50,104 - 叫做什麼名字 - 開什麼玩笑? 648 00:28:50,105 --> 00:28:52,148 我小時候的貓咪就叫做安督瑞爾 649 00:28:52,149 --> 00:28:53,733 我太嗨了 650 00:28:53,734 --> 00:28:55,401 - 我超愛對一大群阿宅 - 我的天啊 651 00:28:55,402 --> 00:28:57,237 - 大開殺戒,太爽了 - 對啊,看得出來 652 00:28:57,905 --> 00:29:00,031 妳知道嗎?我很高興妳來了 653 00:29:00,032 --> 00:29:01,033 我也是 654 00:29:04,369 --> 00:29:07,456 我不是一直都自己玩的 655 00:29:08,248 --> 00:29:10,166 - 好 - 我以前都會 656 00:29:10,167 --> 00:29:12,002 跟我的三個麻吉一起玩 657 00:29:14,129 --> 00:29:16,715 貝卡在亞特蘭大 找到一個超讚的工作,搬走了 658 00:29:17,549 --> 00:29:19,550 凱特結婚,搬走了 659 00:29:19,551 --> 00:29:23,888 而伊萊加入了一個邪教,不准他用手機 660 00:29:23,889 --> 00:29:25,557 不會吧,伊萊啊 661 00:29:26,600 --> 00:29:31,605 有時候我覺得整個宇宙 都在密謀要讓我孤獨終老 662 00:29:38,946 --> 00:29:40,572 我真的好孤單 663 00:29:42,908 --> 00:29:45,869 也許不要跳一週,我們明天見面來聊聊吧 664 00:29:48,997 --> 00:29:50,164 好 665 00:29:50,165 --> 00:29:55,671 不過今晚,我們要好好慶祝 因為我們是洛汗王國的騎兵 666 00:29:56,171 --> 00:29:59,048 酒吧冷知識問答的冠軍 667 00:29:59,049 --> 00:30:00,801 看我的厲害,死阿宅們 668 00:30:01,885 --> 00:30:03,595 - 再見 - 再見 669 00:30:10,602 --> 00:30:14,772 德瑞克還是很掛心那個人型模特兒 670 00:30:14,773 --> 00:30:17,401 但他有慢慢清醒過來了 671 00:30:18,861 --> 00:30:21,487 - 真好玩,對吧? - 對啊,超侵犯隱私的 672 00:30:21,488 --> 00:30:23,406 對啊,我想在小加的家裡放一個 673 00:30:23,407 --> 00:30:25,491 對啊,德德二號去的時候就好玩了 674 00:30:25,492 --> 00:30:26,576 對啊 675 00:30:26,577 --> 00:30:28,995 查理覺得你在哪啊? 676 00:30:28,996 --> 00:30:30,455 在我們的臥室睡覺啊 677 00:30:31,081 --> 00:30:32,290 我爬窗偷溜出來的 678 00:30:32,291 --> 00:30:33,584 - 好,我也這樣做過 - 好 679 00:30:34,668 --> 00:30:37,087 你們培養家庭感情的情況如何? 680 00:30:38,005 --> 00:30:39,047 其實很好 681 00:30:40,257 --> 00:30:43,510 我本來以為除了我自己 我無法跟任何人每分每秒都待在一起 682 00:30:44,136 --> 00:30:47,305 但我好愛她 683 00:30:47,306 --> 00:30:51,100 她好可愛又好自私,她用尖叫來達到目的 684 00:30:51,101 --> 00:30:52,519 我女兒就是我的靈魂伴侶 685 00:30:54,062 --> 00:30:57,399 我不想承認這件事,但謝謝妳 686 00:30:58,442 --> 00:31:00,110 妳教了我們好多事 687 00:31:00,819 --> 00:31:04,615 我不是你該感謝的人,我的朋友 688 00:31:05,949 --> 00:31:08,075 我把當媽說得很厲害 689 00:31:08,076 --> 00:31:11,663 但我養出一群媽寶馬戲團 690 00:31:12,247 --> 00:31:13,999 人總是想當個完美的家長 691 00:31:14,499 --> 00:31:16,877 但不管怎麼做,都一定會搞砸的 692 00:31:17,461 --> 00:31:19,296 真是詭異地令人感到解脫 693 00:31:20,547 --> 00:31:22,715 我會解讀成我犯錯也無所謂 694 00:31:22,716 --> 00:31:25,427 這樣很好,因為我很確定 她吃掉了我一隻藍芽耳機 695 00:31:26,053 --> 00:31:27,262 你遲早會知道的啦 696 00:31:28,805 --> 00:31:31,725 嘿,聽我說,妳的兒子們我都見過了 697 00:31:33,435 --> 00:31:35,562 - 我從來都搞不清楚誰是誰 - 對啊 698 00:31:36,146 --> 00:31:38,565 但他們心地都很善良 699 00:31:39,066 --> 00:31:40,608 馬修沒有 700 00:31:40,609 --> 00:31:45,780 他爸因為他的毒品而進了醫院 701 00:31:45,781 --> 00:31:48,992 他知道這件事,卻根本懶得來 702 00:31:49,743 --> 00:31:53,747 我不知怎麼地養了個王八蛋 他讓我覺得超丟臉 703 00:32:00,921 --> 00:32:02,256 我帶了爸最愛的薯條來 704 00:32:03,465 --> 00:32:05,925 我真的不是那個意思 705 00:32:05,926 --> 00:32:09,054 拜託別走,我們談談吧,馬… 706 00:32:12,599 --> 00:32:14,892 - 幹 - 那是馬修? 707 00:32:14,893 --> 00:32:15,978 我沒辦法… 708 00:32:25,863 --> 00:32:26,864 保羅 709 00:32:29,241 --> 00:32:31,451 - 保羅 - 幹嘛? 710 00:32:32,035 --> 00:32:33,536 嘿,我沒有… 711 00:32:33,537 --> 00:32:36,747 我並沒有擔心你死掉了 712 00:32:36,748 --> 00:32:38,834 看到人坐在黑暗中很正常 713 00:32:40,752 --> 00:32:41,753 而且一動也不動 714 00:32:42,629 --> 00:32:44,381 嘿,第一天回歸的情況如何? 715 00:32:46,675 --> 00:32:47,801 真的很棒 716 00:32:52,639 --> 00:32:55,142 我想我不該再當治療師了 717 00:32:55,684 --> 00:32:56,809 保羅,你認真? 718 00:32:56,810 --> 00:32:59,438 - 我才不會上當兩次 - 沒有,我是認真的 719 00:33:00,480 --> 00:33:04,400 我離開再回來之後,才看清這一點 720 00:33:04,401 --> 00:33:05,402 可是… 721 00:33:07,696 --> 00:33:08,864 是時候了,吉米 722 00:33:11,283 --> 00:33:12,743 應該由我來跟你說是時候了 723 00:33:13,535 --> 00:33:15,537 好啊,你想的話就說吧 724 00:33:18,540 --> 00:33:21,210 - 你該退休了,保羅 - 好 725 00:33:23,128 --> 00:33:25,839 這不是我想像中的情況,你知道嗎? 726 00:33:26,340 --> 00:33:27,757 對啊 727 00:33:27,758 --> 00:33:28,759 來抱抱 728 00:33:30,260 --> 00:33:32,095 拜託啦,保羅,我需要 729 00:33:36,099 --> 00:33:37,100 真他媽的,兄弟 730 00:33:40,437 --> 00:33:41,522 我會想你的 731 00:33:42,731 --> 00:33:44,441 你對我來說真的超重要 732 00:33:45,192 --> 00:33:46,859 我一直都想跟你說一件事 733 00:33:46,860 --> 00:33:49,487 - 我現在就要說了 - 天啊,吉米,拜託一下 734 00:33:49,488 --> 00:33:50,738 我不是現在就要離開 735 00:33:50,739 --> 00:33:53,617 我得通知患者們,還得做轉診 736 00:33:54,284 --> 00:33:56,828 要結束這診所的事得花幾個月 737 00:33:57,329 --> 00:34:00,623 你只能道別一次,但不是今天 738 00:34:00,624 --> 00:34:02,792 來吧,我要在回家路上去吃披薩 739 00:34:02,793 --> 00:34:03,836 走吧 740 00:34:07,297 --> 00:34:08,465 走了啦 741 00:35:08,901 --> 00:35:10,903 字幕翻譯:徐懿芬