1
00:00:06,049 --> 00:00:08,342
[rock guitar riff playing]
2
00:00:08,426 --> 00:00:09,719
Cheese festival.
3
00:00:10,470 --> 00:00:12,055
Cheese festival.
4
00:00:13,639 --> 00:00:15,308
Another cheese festival.
5
00:00:16,851 --> 00:00:17,852
Hold up.
6
00:00:17,935 --> 00:00:20,313
There's a warehouse rave in Milwaukee.
7
00:00:20,396 --> 00:00:23,483
I need this. I want to go somewhere
where I don't have to hold back.
8
00:00:24,067 --> 00:00:25,193
You've been holding back?
9
00:00:25,276 --> 00:00:26,944
You have no idea.
10
00:00:28,446 --> 00:00:29,280
I don't know.
11
00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:32,492
Last time I went to a rave,
I stayed up for two days.
12
00:00:32,575 --> 00:00:36,162
Turns out, if a mint is 40 bucks,
it's not a mint.
13
00:00:37,497 --> 00:00:38,581
Great story.
14
00:00:39,082 --> 00:00:40,166
I still want to go.
15
00:00:40,792 --> 00:00:42,251
You know what I want?
16
00:00:42,335 --> 00:00:43,169
Don't say Jay.
17
00:00:43,252 --> 00:00:44,253
Jay.
18
00:00:44,337 --> 00:00:45,630
[Ozzie groans]
19
00:00:45,713 --> 00:00:48,299
It was so hot when he didn't kiss me
on the car the other night.
20
00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:50,218
What does it mean? Where is it going?
21
00:00:50,301 --> 00:00:52,095
Should I start shaving
the back of my legs?
22
00:00:53,638 --> 00:00:56,849
Leia, placing all of your value
in the hands of a man
23
00:00:56,933 --> 00:00:58,142
is just giving it away,
24
00:00:58,226 --> 00:01:01,270
and the result of living
in an oppressive patriarchal society.
25
00:01:01,854 --> 00:01:04,649
She read the "Riot Grrrl Manifesto"
and won't shut up about it.
26
00:01:06,067 --> 00:01:07,568
I want to be a feminist.
27
00:01:08,277 --> 00:01:09,570
In college.
28
00:01:10,696 --> 00:01:14,158
But right now,
I really, really, really want a boyfriend.
29
00:01:14,659 --> 00:01:15,868
You didn't kiss her?
30
00:01:16,369 --> 00:01:18,746
Jay Kelso, of the Point Place Kelsos?
31
00:01:19,539 --> 00:01:21,499
The horniest family in town?
32
00:01:21,999 --> 00:01:23,835
I don't know what came over me.
33
00:01:24,335 --> 00:01:27,463
I mean, there's one voice in my head
saying, "Honk her boob, bro."
34
00:01:27,547 --> 00:01:29,382
But he's always there, so that's normal.
35
00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:35,471
The weird part was there was
this other sweet voice saying, "No, bro."
36
00:01:35,972 --> 00:01:37,181
"Honk her heart."
37
00:01:38,224 --> 00:01:40,560
Hey, wait.
You know what this means, right?
38
00:01:40,643 --> 00:01:41,477
You like her.
39
00:01:42,061 --> 00:01:43,771
No… Right?
40
00:01:44,730 --> 00:01:45,731
No.
41
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:50,486
Yes, that's what that sweet voice means.
You're seeing her as a person.
42
00:01:50,570 --> 00:01:51,571
Weird.
43
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:55,241
Leia, I'm not sure
if you're ready for Jay.
44
00:01:55,324 --> 00:01:56,576
He's a player.
45
00:01:56,659 --> 00:01:58,244
You just had your first kiss.
46
00:01:58,327 --> 00:01:59,662
Jay's had sex in a lake.
47
00:02:01,164 --> 00:02:03,457
I don't even like
to put my face in a lake.
48
00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:07,295
We don't want you to end up being
49
00:02:07,378 --> 00:02:10,131
some summer hookup
he dumps before school starts.
50
00:02:10,214 --> 00:02:12,383
Last Labor Day was a massacre.
51
00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:15,970
I've never seen so many Jennifers
crying in the same driveway.
52
00:02:16,637 --> 00:02:18,181
You need to close the deal ASAP.
53
00:02:18,264 --> 00:02:20,516
Just tell Leia you like her. Let's go.
54
00:02:21,601 --> 00:02:22,727
I can't.
55
00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:25,646
My dad always told me
to never tell a girl you like her first.
56
00:02:25,730 --> 00:02:27,773
It gives them all the control
in the relationship.
57
00:02:27,857 --> 00:02:29,650
[scoffs] That's not true.
58
00:02:29,734 --> 00:02:32,904
I made the first move with Nikki,
and I am totally in the driver's seat.
59
00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:34,947
That's right, babe.
60
00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:43,539
Dude, she makes you wear her dad's old
doctor pager in case she needs something.
61
00:02:43,623 --> 00:02:45,750
Hey, I only use it for emergencies.
62
00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:48,544
-Yeah, like last night.
-And what did you need last night?
63
00:02:48,628 --> 00:02:49,629
Gum.
64
00:02:51,005 --> 00:02:51,964
Emergency gum.
65
00:02:53,799 --> 00:02:55,051
Are you guys sure about Jay?
66
00:02:55,134 --> 00:02:56,761
A guy's not just gonna
pretend to be sweet.
67
00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:58,262
What would be the point of that?
68
00:02:58,971 --> 00:03:00,223
We don't get paid enough.
69
00:03:01,599 --> 00:03:05,436
Okay, look. If you're dead set
on dating that lake humper,
70
00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:07,146
at least be smart about it.
71
00:03:07,230 --> 00:03:08,439
Don't throw yourself at him.
72
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:11,567
You are a goddess. Own your power.
73
00:03:11,651 --> 00:03:12,485
You're right.
74
00:03:12,568 --> 00:03:13,819
[both] I'm going to make sure…
75
00:03:13,903 --> 00:03:15,780
-…he comes to me first.
-…she comes to me first.
76
00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:17,657
-[rock music plays]
-One, two, three, four!
77
00:03:17,740 --> 00:03:19,742
♪ Hangin' out down the street ♪
78
00:03:19,825 --> 00:03:21,577
♪ The same old thing we did last week ♪
79
00:03:21,661 --> 00:03:23,829
♪ Not a thing to do ♪
80
00:03:23,913 --> 00:03:25,998
♪ But talk to you ♪
81
00:03:26,082 --> 00:03:27,083
♪ We're all all right! ♪
82
00:03:27,166 --> 00:03:28,709
♪ We're all all right! ♪
83
00:03:28,793 --> 00:03:31,337
[young woman] Hello, Wisconsin!
84
00:03:32,338 --> 00:03:34,882
Now, I love Law & Order.
85
00:03:34,966 --> 00:03:37,927
The first part is about law,
and the second part is about order.
86
00:03:38,010 --> 00:03:39,303
It's very satisfying.
87
00:03:40,805 --> 00:03:43,599
Yep, the title pretty much explains it.
88
00:03:45,101 --> 00:03:46,644
Like Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.
89
00:03:46,727 --> 00:03:49,105
He shrunk his kids,
and now he has to tell his wife.
90
00:03:49,188 --> 00:03:50,022
I'm all caught up.
91
00:03:51,315 --> 00:03:54,944
Kitty, the whole point of watching TV
92
00:03:55,027 --> 00:03:57,405
is so we don't have to talk to each other.
93
00:03:57,905 --> 00:03:59,615
All right, I'll hush up.
94
00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:02,660
[exhales sharply]
95
00:04:15,548 --> 00:04:18,092
Did I tell you how adorable
Leia was the other day?
96
00:04:19,552 --> 00:04:23,097
We were coming up with
celebrity pasta names.
97
00:04:23,180 --> 00:04:24,932
I said Penne and Teller.
98
00:04:25,016 --> 00:04:26,392
[chuckles]
99
00:04:27,476 --> 00:04:30,604
She said Marky Markaroni.
100
00:04:32,815 --> 00:04:36,736
You know, I… I'm more than
just a grandma to her. I'm…
101
00:04:36,819 --> 00:04:38,738
We are friends and hang out.
102
00:04:40,489 --> 00:04:41,490
Hang out?
103
00:04:43,075 --> 00:04:45,286
You know who hung out with their parents?
104
00:04:46,537 --> 00:04:48,289
The Menendez brothers.
105
00:04:51,917 --> 00:04:52,918
Well.
106
00:04:54,170 --> 00:04:55,880
I'm not a fan of the murders.
107
00:04:58,215 --> 00:05:00,009
But a big fan of the sweaters.
108
00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:04,013
Look… [coughs]
109
00:05:04,096 --> 00:05:08,601
We are not meant to be friends with kids.
110
00:05:08,684 --> 00:05:13,147
They're always eating, taking…
clogging things.
111
00:05:14,023 --> 00:05:16,859
You turn your back for one second,
112
00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:21,030
and some dumbass has put
a loaf of bread in your toilet.
113
00:05:21,113 --> 00:05:22,114
Oh!
114
00:05:22,615 --> 00:05:24,283
Rigatony Danza!
115
00:05:25,910 --> 00:05:28,329
Rigatony Danza! Leia! Leia!
116
00:05:28,412 --> 00:05:31,832
[funky rock music playing]
117
00:05:34,210 --> 00:05:36,670
So your plan is to just oil yourself up
118
00:05:36,754 --> 00:05:40,132
and wait out here
for Leia to catch a hot glimpse?
119
00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:43,427
You forgot. I also brought my guitar.
120
00:05:47,598 --> 00:05:49,016
Okay, too much oil.
121
00:05:49,141 --> 00:05:50,976
Ugh! You're so cheesy.
122
00:05:51,477 --> 00:05:52,895
She's gonna love it.
123
00:05:52,978 --> 00:05:54,855
[panting] Hey, Nik. I got your page.
124
00:05:54,939 --> 00:05:56,941
I called your house,
but your mom said you were here.
125
00:05:57,024 --> 00:05:58,901
I need some of this on my shoulders.
126
00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:00,569
Oh. 'Course, babe.
127
00:06:01,153 --> 00:06:03,406
-Yeah, you're in the driver's seat.
-[chuckles]
128
00:06:07,326 --> 00:06:08,452
[Gwen] Seriously?
129
00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:10,121
You look like a wet hot dog.
130
00:06:11,747 --> 00:06:12,915
Thanks, Gwen.
131
00:06:16,168 --> 00:06:17,294
Hey, girl.
132
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:25,845
Jay, hi.
133
00:06:25,928 --> 00:06:28,389
I mean, hi, Jai. Jay. Jai.
134
00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:30,766
Jai. [chuckles]
135
00:06:31,350 --> 00:06:32,351
Jai.
136
00:06:33,018 --> 00:06:34,019
I like that.
137
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:36,313
That can be your cute nickname for me.
138
00:06:36,397 --> 00:06:38,023
[chuckles]
139
00:06:38,107 --> 00:06:39,859
Okay. [giggles]
140
00:06:39,942 --> 00:06:41,402
Not okay. Let's go.
141
00:06:41,485 --> 00:06:42,736
Or you can stay here.
142
00:06:42,820 --> 00:06:45,364
You know, hang with… Jai.
143
00:06:46,532 --> 00:06:48,742
-Could I talk to you for a second?
-Sure.
144
00:06:48,826 --> 00:06:49,827
Okay.
145
00:06:51,662 --> 00:06:53,539
Why are you acting like Jay's pimp?
146
00:06:53,622 --> 00:06:57,084
I'm trying to get him coupled up with Leia
so he'll leave me and Nate alone.
147
00:06:57,168 --> 00:06:59,503
They share ice cream cones.
When Jay had mono, I got it.
148
00:07:00,963 --> 00:07:03,132
I don't want her to be
another one of Jay's summer lays.
149
00:07:03,215 --> 00:07:05,926
It's not like that. He actually likes her.
150
00:07:06,010 --> 00:07:08,554
Then he can ask her out like a gentleman.
151
00:07:08,637 --> 00:07:10,222
He won't do that.
152
00:07:10,306 --> 00:07:12,683
It's not allowed in his family
or something.
153
00:07:13,184 --> 00:07:15,936
Okay, well, she's not going to either,
so I guess we're done.
154
00:07:16,020 --> 00:07:18,189
See, it's all about moving the fingers.
155
00:07:18,272 --> 00:07:19,773
[Leia giggles]
156
00:07:19,857 --> 00:07:21,942
I can feel you talking in my ear.
157
00:07:22,860 --> 00:07:23,694
Leia!
158
00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:25,821
[scoffs] Sorry, I have to go.
159
00:07:31,035 --> 00:07:32,411
How did that not work?
160
00:07:32,495 --> 00:07:35,748
I mean, I even borrowed my dad's CK One
and put it everywhere.
161
00:07:37,374 --> 00:07:38,667
You smell great!
162
00:07:39,627 --> 00:07:41,128
Can I get a little of that, bro?
163
00:07:43,005 --> 00:07:44,006
Get in here!
164
00:07:52,181 --> 00:07:53,557
[beeping]
165
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:54,725
Who's paging me?
166
00:07:56,727 --> 00:07:58,062
[loud dialing]
167
00:07:59,230 --> 00:08:00,314
Hello.
168
00:08:02,233 --> 00:08:03,859
[in deep voice] Oh. Hi, Dr. Klein.
169
00:08:05,110 --> 00:08:07,446
[whispers] It's some doctor.
He thinks I'm Nikki's dad.
170
00:08:07,530 --> 00:08:08,447
Hang up.
171
00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:10,241
Or…
172
00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:12,201
[in deep voice] Uh-huh.
173
00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:15,788
Yes, I agree, that should be removed.
174
00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:19,166
Okay, sweet. [chuckles]
175
00:08:20,584 --> 00:08:21,919
Bye. [giggles]
176
00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:24,171
Bro.
177
00:08:24,797 --> 00:08:25,923
I just doctored!
178
00:08:27,341 --> 00:08:29,051
Mad respect, bro.
179
00:08:29,635 --> 00:08:30,761
Doctor Bro.
180
00:08:32,555 --> 00:08:35,266
[funky rock music playing]
181
00:08:37,810 --> 00:08:39,687
-Hi.
-Good morning.
182
00:08:39,770 --> 00:08:41,105
How did you get in my room?
183
00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:42,606
I climbed through the window.
184
00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:45,693
So what should we talk about?
Jay? Okay, sure.
185
00:08:45,776 --> 00:08:47,111
I think you should go for it.
186
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:49,405
-I can't.
-Why not?
187
00:08:51,407 --> 00:08:52,741
What the hell is this?
188
00:08:52,825 --> 00:08:55,494
Shouldn't you be controlling
my brother's life with your body?
189
00:08:56,954 --> 00:08:58,747
He's like a zombie with a boner.
190
00:09:00,374 --> 00:09:03,210
So, Leia, Nate and I have
Batman Forever tickets tonight.
191
00:09:03,294 --> 00:09:05,546
But I was thinking,
you and Jay could use them
192
00:09:05,629 --> 00:09:09,049
and hang out… in the dark…
with no annoying people around.
193
00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:11,427
I would love to
194
00:09:11,510 --> 00:09:13,929
pass on that because I have plans tonight.
195
00:09:14,013 --> 00:09:15,514
Oh, really?
196
00:09:16,015 --> 00:09:17,516
Tell me more about these "plans."
197
00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:20,227
Um… we're going to, um…
198
00:09:20,311 --> 00:09:21,604
A rave in Milwaukee!
199
00:09:22,938 --> 00:09:24,189
Uh, yeah.
200
00:09:24,815 --> 00:09:26,108
Totally. A rave.
201
00:09:26,191 --> 00:09:27,860
I thought you were
taking a break from raves
202
00:09:27,943 --> 00:09:30,279
after you got stuck
in your neighbor's doggy door.
203
00:09:31,363 --> 00:09:32,781
I thought it was Narnia.
204
00:09:33,365 --> 00:09:34,408
It wasn't.
205
00:09:34,992 --> 00:09:37,995
Okay, well, if you're all going
to this totally real rave, then so are we.
206
00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:39,705
Cool. See you there.
207
00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:42,416
A rave?! Why did you say that?
208
00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:44,126
For purely selfish reasons.
209
00:09:45,127 --> 00:09:46,420
I can't.
210
00:09:46,503 --> 00:09:50,049
Raves are dangerous and illegal.
And what even is the bathroom situation?
211
00:09:50,132 --> 00:09:53,177
I'm a shy pee-er.
I can barely pee at the library.
212
00:09:53,802 --> 00:09:55,888
Relax. There'll be plenty of bathrooms.
213
00:09:55,971 --> 00:09:57,765
That's where everyone goes
to have sex and do drugs.
214
00:09:57,848 --> 00:09:59,558
What?! Forget it.
215
00:09:59,642 --> 00:10:01,769
I… This is way out of my comfort zone.
216
00:10:01,852 --> 00:10:03,937
Besides, my grandparents
would never let me go.
217
00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:05,105
Then lie.
218
00:10:05,189 --> 00:10:06,982
To their sweet little faces?
219
00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:09,401
I could never do that.
220
00:10:10,027 --> 00:10:12,071
A movie? That sounds fun.
221
00:10:13,364 --> 00:10:15,324
Yep. [chuckles] Batman Forever.
222
00:10:15,407 --> 00:10:17,701
-It's getting rave reviews.
-Dude.
223
00:10:17,785 --> 00:10:20,454
Um, I mean, not rave reviews.
Mixed reviews.
224
00:10:20,537 --> 00:10:21,580
You caught me! I lied!
225
00:10:21,664 --> 00:10:24,917
I mean, I didn't lie
about going to the movies.
226
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,085
I lied about the rave…
227
00:10:26,168 --> 00:10:27,002
reviews!
228
00:10:27,086 --> 00:10:28,045
We should get going.
229
00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:30,130
Bye, Grandma. Bye, Grandpa.
Rave a good night!
230
00:10:32,257 --> 00:10:33,384
Enjoy the movie!
231
00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:36,720
They're lying.
232
00:10:38,639 --> 00:10:41,308
Oh, Leia wouldn't do that to me.
233
00:10:41,392 --> 00:10:43,018
She's my pasta pal.
234
00:10:43,102 --> 00:10:47,106
Oh, darn it. I forgot to tell her
about Spaghetti Murphy.
235
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:51,235
[rock music playing]
236
00:10:53,362 --> 00:10:54,363
Wow.
237
00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:57,116
Those girls are half naked.
238
00:10:57,199 --> 00:10:58,450
[dance music playing faintly]
239
00:10:58,534 --> 00:10:59,868
And it's terrible.
240
00:11:03,122 --> 00:11:04,456
Why do you smell like cat pee?
241
00:11:04,540 --> 00:11:06,542
To close the deal with Leia,
242
00:11:07,459 --> 00:11:09,378
I put on a bunch of these pheromones
243
00:11:09,461 --> 00:11:11,672
I bought from the back
of my bodybuilding magazine.
244
00:11:12,506 --> 00:11:14,466
Tiger Sweat. [chuckles]
245
00:11:14,550 --> 00:11:15,634
That's badass.
246
00:11:15,718 --> 00:11:18,137
Ladies find the scent irresistible.
247
00:11:18,220 --> 00:11:20,556
Ugh! The van smells like ass.
248
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:24,351
I got a terrible feeling
we didn't do something.
249
00:11:25,227 --> 00:11:27,271
-Did I bring the glow sticks?
-Yeah.
250
00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:28,981
Did I bring all the pacifiers?
251
00:11:29,064 --> 00:11:30,524
No, I did.
252
00:11:31,942 --> 00:11:33,485
What else could we be forgetting?
253
00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:36,697
Ozzie!
254
00:11:37,781 --> 00:11:41,326
[screaming]
255
00:11:43,412 --> 00:11:45,664
I found this in the driveway.
256
00:11:49,293 --> 00:11:51,378
Still think they're at the movies?
257
00:11:51,462 --> 00:11:52,421
Well, let's…
258
00:11:53,130 --> 00:11:54,965
Let's not jump to conclusions.
259
00:11:56,008 --> 00:11:57,426
Ozzie, sweetie,
260
00:11:57,509 --> 00:12:01,722
why do you look like something
from one of my sleeping pill dreams?
261
00:12:06,477 --> 00:12:07,686
He's not talking.
262
00:12:09,021 --> 00:12:10,022
Yet.
263
00:12:11,607 --> 00:12:14,735
Now… where's my granddaughter?
264
00:12:15,444 --> 00:12:17,654
I'm not saying jack squat
until I talk to my mother.
265
00:12:17,738 --> 00:12:21,575
You'll never see your mother again
until you start talking.
266
00:12:22,493 --> 00:12:23,452
[sighs]
267
00:12:23,535 --> 00:12:24,369
Okay, fine.
268
00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:27,331
She went to nunya.
269
00:12:30,125 --> 00:12:31,710
Now we're getting somewhere.
270
00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,213
Where's nunya?
271
00:12:34,797 --> 00:12:35,881
Nunya business.
272
00:12:39,885 --> 00:12:42,554
Well, Red, you kinda…
You just kinda walked into that.
273
00:12:43,806 --> 00:12:46,683
[rock music playing]
274
00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:50,354
-How could you drive off without Ozzie?
-What? Don't blame me.
275
00:12:50,437 --> 00:12:53,398
I was a little distracted
ordering a blood transfusion.
276
00:12:54,358 --> 00:12:56,193
-What?
-Don't worry about it.
277
00:12:58,654 --> 00:13:00,948
You were right about the bathroom.
It was crazy.
278
00:13:01,031 --> 00:13:03,075
Some girl tried to hug me on the toilet.
279
00:13:03,158 --> 00:13:04,076
[Leia sighs]
280
00:13:04,743 --> 00:13:05,744
I've had enough.
281
00:13:05,828 --> 00:13:07,579
I'm gonna do the mature thing
and talk to Jay.
282
00:13:08,163 --> 00:13:09,164
Hold my binky.
283
00:13:12,501 --> 00:13:13,627
Hey, Jay.
284
00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:17,714
Um, can we just talk to each other
instead of whatever it is we're doing?
285
00:13:17,798 --> 00:13:19,508
Oh, I'm so glad you said that.
286
00:13:19,591 --> 00:13:22,427
We had a nice thing going,
and now everyone got involved.
287
00:13:22,511 --> 00:13:24,555
-It just got weird.
-Exactly.
288
00:13:25,055 --> 00:13:28,934
How about, on the count of three,
we both just say how we feel?
289
00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:30,352
Great.
290
00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:31,395
[both] One, two, three.
291
00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:33,480
-I like you.
-I knew it!
292
00:13:34,523 --> 00:13:37,943
-What? No, you tricked me.
-Well, it doesn't matter. You said it.
293
00:13:38,026 --> 00:13:38,944
[scoffs]
294
00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:42,614
Oh my God. Everyone's right.
You… You're a player.
295
00:13:42,698 --> 00:13:45,033
Hey. That's an ugly stereotype
296
00:13:45,117 --> 00:13:47,286
for hot guys like me
who date lots of chicks.
297
00:13:47,369 --> 00:13:49,788
[scoffs] You know what? I did like you.
298
00:13:49,872 --> 00:13:53,584
I liked that guy on the car
who was sweet and sincere.
299
00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:56,044
But not this guy. This guy sucks.
300
00:13:56,628 --> 00:13:59,339
Well, fine. It doesn't matter
if you're into me or not.
301
00:13:59,423 --> 00:14:01,925
There's a warehouse
full of hot girls in there,
302
00:14:02,009 --> 00:14:03,385
and I smell like a tiger.
303
00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:06,680
A tiger's butthole!
304
00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:11,476
And there are guys in there too.
We'll see who has a better night.
305
00:14:11,560 --> 00:14:13,353
And you haven't seen my moves.
306
00:14:14,146 --> 00:14:15,439
What happened to my arm?
307
00:14:15,522 --> 00:14:17,649
It's feeling the music! That's what!
308
00:14:18,150 --> 00:14:20,277
Okay. Good luck in there.
309
00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:21,778
[scoffs]
310
00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:26,575
[loud, pulsing dance music playing]
311
00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:32,998
[talking over music]
Is Jay seeing how much fun I'm having?
312
00:14:33,582 --> 00:14:37,085
It's hard to tell.
He's surrounded by so many girls.
313
00:14:37,169 --> 00:14:38,170
Pow.
314
00:14:39,004 --> 00:14:39,963
Hi-yah!
315
00:14:40,505 --> 00:14:41,673
Karate!
316
00:14:44,009 --> 00:14:45,552
[Leia] I need to step it up.
317
00:14:49,723 --> 00:14:50,891
Are you okay?
318
00:14:51,934 --> 00:14:53,435
Do you need medical help?
319
00:14:53,518 --> 00:14:54,811
That guy's a doctor.
320
00:14:56,855 --> 00:14:57,940
X-ray!
321
00:14:58,941 --> 00:15:00,067
Which one?
322
00:15:02,110 --> 00:15:03,153
All of them.
323
00:15:05,197 --> 00:15:06,239
Ozzie…
324
00:15:06,949 --> 00:15:08,116
Honey…
325
00:15:09,910 --> 00:15:12,871
Obviously, you put a ton of work
into that costume.
326
00:15:12,955 --> 00:15:15,499
[gasps] Thank you for noticing.
327
00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:18,377
I mean, the stitching on the rickrack.
328
00:15:18,460 --> 00:15:19,503
Wow!
329
00:15:20,963 --> 00:15:23,715
I want you to know that I see you.
330
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:26,301
And I'm proud of you.
331
00:15:27,302 --> 00:15:29,888
And I am dazzled
332
00:15:29,972 --> 00:15:31,473
by your little balls.
333
00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:47,322
Okay, Mrs. Forman.
I'll tell you where Leia is.
334
00:15:47,406 --> 00:15:48,573
See, Red?
335
00:15:48,657 --> 00:15:51,994
If you trust them,
and you… you treat them with respect,
336
00:15:52,077 --> 00:15:53,912
they will be honest with you.
337
00:15:54,496 --> 00:15:56,248
Leia's at a rave in Milwaukee.
338
00:15:56,957 --> 00:15:58,542
That lying little bitch.
339
00:15:59,835 --> 00:16:02,337
[rock music playing]
340
00:16:03,839 --> 00:16:05,507
[loud dance music resumes]
341
00:16:06,550 --> 00:16:10,053
You've been answering
my dad's doctor pages?
342
00:16:10,137 --> 00:16:11,805
I did pretty well, Nik.
343
00:16:11,888 --> 00:16:14,307
I got invited to a conference in Denver.
344
00:16:17,644 --> 00:16:19,229
He's coupled off.
345
00:16:20,147 --> 00:16:21,690
What should I do?
346
00:16:21,773 --> 00:16:25,110
Maybe stop dancing with just me.
347
00:16:25,193 --> 00:16:26,236
On it.
348
00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:47,466
Oh f**k. I'm f**king f**ked.
349
00:16:48,425 --> 00:16:49,301
Yep.
350
00:16:53,555 --> 00:16:56,099
So, to date,
the furthest I've gotten with a guy
351
00:16:56,183 --> 00:16:58,393
was grinding on my grandpa at a rave.
352
00:16:59,728 --> 00:17:02,022
Well, it's not nothing.
He took you home with him.
353
00:17:03,315 --> 00:17:05,567
This isn't funny, Gwen.
He's gonna kill me.
354
00:17:05,650 --> 00:17:08,111
I'm sorry. This kinda feels like my fault.
355
00:17:08,195 --> 00:17:09,905
That's because it's all your fault.
356
00:17:10,864 --> 00:17:13,950
I was trying to empower you,
but, to be honest,
357
00:17:14,034 --> 00:17:16,286
I only skimmed
that whole riot grrrl thing.
358
00:17:16,787 --> 00:17:19,456
But, if I had to guess
what it's all about,
359
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:23,293
you should get to do what you want
without anyone holding you back,
360
00:17:23,376 --> 00:17:24,211
including me.
361
00:17:25,629 --> 00:17:29,466
So, if you still want Jay,
then go get him.
362
00:17:31,301 --> 00:17:33,261
After tonight, I don't know what I want.
363
00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:36,890
Either way, I should probably
break up with my grandpa first.
364
00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:38,934
[both chuckle]
365
00:17:39,851 --> 00:17:40,852
Gwen.
366
00:17:40,936 --> 00:17:41,937
Get out.
367
00:17:42,896 --> 00:17:44,064
This is nunya.
368
00:17:46,650 --> 00:17:48,235
Nunya business.
369
00:17:52,823 --> 00:17:54,449
I'm so sorry, you guys.
370
00:17:54,533 --> 00:17:58,120
But, Grandma, you should know,
I feel nothing but regrettuccine Alfredo.
371
00:17:59,454 --> 00:18:00,664
Okay, that was good.
372
00:18:02,082 --> 00:18:03,166
But Grandma's pissed.
373
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:05,460
I am so disappointed in you.
374
00:18:05,544 --> 00:18:08,839
You took advantage of my trust, my love,
375
00:18:09,673 --> 00:18:11,842
and all of my good safety pins.
376
00:18:13,009 --> 00:18:14,469
-I really messed up.
-[Kitty] Uh-huh.
377
00:18:14,553 --> 00:18:16,429
Well, you are grounded for a week.
378
00:18:16,513 --> 00:18:18,473
No cable, no Nintendo.
379
00:18:18,557 --> 00:18:20,308
And that Chia Pet you like so much?
380
00:18:20,809 --> 00:18:23,145
I'm gonna put it in the freezer
until it dies.
381
00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:27,107
Red, do you have anything to add?
382
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:28,608
No.
383
00:18:29,568 --> 00:18:32,487
Just that… we're glad
you're home safe, kiddo.
384
00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:35,073
That's it?
385
00:18:35,157 --> 00:18:41,329
Well, I've seen enough Law & Order
to know that there has to be a good cop.
386
00:18:41,413 --> 00:18:42,664
So, I'm the bad cop?
387
00:18:45,250 --> 00:18:46,251
Oh, I like this.
388
00:18:47,586 --> 00:18:50,380
-Is this how you feel all the time?
-Oh yeah.
389
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:52,924
[laughs] You are bad!
390
00:18:53,008 --> 00:18:54,968
[Kitty laughs]
391
00:18:55,677 --> 00:18:58,096
-Aw, you guys.
-Yeah, no. Go to your room.
392
00:19:04,311 --> 00:19:05,270
Hey.
393
00:19:05,353 --> 00:19:07,439
Hey. I heard you were grounded.
394
00:19:07,522 --> 00:19:08,815
I got busted too.
395
00:19:08,899 --> 00:19:11,818
That Tiger Sweat stuff
burned a hole in our carpet.
396
00:19:11,902 --> 00:19:13,445
Now my mom's pissed.
397
00:19:14,362 --> 00:19:17,991
Look… I just wanted to apologize
for how things went.
398
00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:20,410
It's okay.
399
00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:22,120
We both got kinda caught up in it.
400
00:19:22,204 --> 00:19:25,582
[sighs] Look, I really am the guy
you thought I was.
401
00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:28,001
Okay? I'm done playing games.
402
00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:32,797
How about, on the count of three,
we both say how we feel about each other?
403
00:19:32,881 --> 00:19:35,133
-For real this time.
-Okay.
404
00:19:35,967 --> 00:19:37,302
[both] One, two, three.
405
00:19:37,385 --> 00:19:39,554
-I like you.
-I think we should just be friends.
406
00:19:42,933 --> 00:19:44,392
Wait, friends?
407
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:47,604
-Yeah.
-Like Ross and Rachel?
408
00:19:49,814 --> 00:19:51,566
More like Joey and Chandler.
409
00:19:52,817 --> 00:19:55,987
Look, the summer's not that long.
Let's not complicate it.
410
00:19:56,655 --> 00:19:58,198
So, friends?
411
00:19:58,281 --> 00:20:00,408
Sure. Friends.
412
00:20:00,492 --> 00:20:03,411
Friends? After he said all that?
413
00:20:03,495 --> 00:20:05,163
I'm so confused.
414
00:20:05,247 --> 00:20:06,414
So is he.
415
00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:08,541
Now I have all the power.
416
00:20:09,876 --> 00:20:10,710
It was a move.
417
00:20:11,503 --> 00:20:14,214
I played the player. I Kelsoed the Kelso.
418
00:20:14,297 --> 00:20:15,507
I…
419
00:20:15,590 --> 00:20:17,425
need you to tell me
I didn't screw it all up.
420
00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:20,053
It's so manipulative and sneaky.
421
00:20:20,804 --> 00:20:21,721
I love it.
422
00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:25,392
Hey! I'm still mad.
423
00:20:25,475 --> 00:20:26,893
Less talk, more rave.
424
00:20:28,311 --> 00:20:31,481
[electronic dance music playing]
425
00:20:41,783 --> 00:20:44,703
[rock music playing]