1 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:09,759 [rock guitar riff playing] 2 00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:11,845 Done. What was my time? 3 00:00:11,928 --> 00:00:13,346 It was very fast. 4 00:00:13,847 --> 00:00:14,889 All right. 5 00:00:15,724 --> 00:00:19,894 It's time to oil the hinges on the front door, huh? 6 00:00:20,478 --> 00:00:22,772 - Time me. - And... go! 7 00:00:24,357 --> 00:00:26,860 Yeah, I'm not... I'm not even using the stopwatch. 8 00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:31,114 He's moving around pretty good after his little accident. 9 00:00:31,197 --> 00:00:33,408 Oh, you mean when you ran over him with your bike? 10 00:00:33,491 --> 00:00:35,577 Gosh, are you ever gonna let me live that down? 11 00:00:35,660 --> 00:00:39,873 It was two days ago. He still has a tire track on his hip. 12 00:00:39,956 --> 00:00:41,374 [thunderclap] 13 00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:44,169 Wow, it is rainin' tits and livers out there. 14 00:00:45,086 --> 00:00:47,172 This rain is never gonna let up. 15 00:00:47,255 --> 00:00:50,216 I was supposed to donate all our old junk today, but now I can't. 16 00:00:50,300 --> 00:00:52,140 Oh, the church won't mind if your stuff is wet. 17 00:00:52,218 --> 00:00:54,488 I gave 'em a box of old bras that were covered in caramel, 18 00:00:54,512 --> 00:00:55,889 and they were thrilled. 19 00:00:58,558 --> 00:01:01,311 Yeah, no. Now that it's raining, Red won't leave the house, 20 00:01:01,394 --> 00:01:03,438 and he never lets me get rid of anything. 21 00:01:03,521 --> 00:01:08,026 If he paid four dollars for a can opener in 1975, 22 00:01:08,109 --> 00:01:09,569 he wants to be buried with it. 23 00:01:09,652 --> 00:01:12,322 I had a uncle that was buried in a Packers helmet, 24 00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:14,616 but that was just because we couldn't get it off. 25 00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:18,495 - Did you hear the front door open? - No. 26 00:01:18,578 --> 00:01:19,746 Exactly. 27 00:01:19,829 --> 00:01:25,585 Because we have the quietest hinges on the block. 28 00:01:25,668 --> 00:01:28,129 And the Kowalskis can suck it! 29 00:01:29,130 --> 00:01:31,341 So... what else is on the fritz? 30 00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:33,218 Red, you should come help me. 31 00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:35,637 The kids have been home all summer trashin' my house. 32 00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:37,597 I could keep you busy for hours. 33 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:40,475 Oh, that is a great idea. 34 00:01:40,558 --> 00:01:42,936 Yeah. The other day, a doorknob fell off in my hand, 35 00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:45,146 and now that's just a room we don't go in anymore. 36 00:01:46,356 --> 00:01:47,356 Oh shoot. 37 00:01:47,774 --> 00:01:48,817 We had a fish in there. 38 00:01:50,026 --> 00:01:52,862 Red, you love to flush a dead fish. 39 00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:55,250 But he's gonna have to fix the toilet first. 40 00:01:55,281 --> 00:01:57,117 It makes a sound like this when you flush. 41 00:01:57,200 --> 00:01:58,326 [makes bubbling noise] 42 00:01:58,409 --> 00:01:59,661 [makes squealing sound] 43 00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:01,454 Take me there! 44 00:02:02,330 --> 00:02:03,498 Thank you. 45 00:02:06,751 --> 00:02:10,338 I'm sorry you have to see this disgusting hickey I got from Jay. 46 00:02:11,172 --> 00:02:13,049 I... I'm so embarrassed. 47 00:02:15,176 --> 00:02:17,679 Leia, there's literally nothing there. 48 00:02:17,762 --> 00:02:19,639 No, no, no. Get up close. 49 00:02:19,722 --> 00:02:22,016 It's... It's so gross. 50 00:02:22,517 --> 00:02:26,146 She wants a big song and dance, but we are not giving it to her. 51 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:29,107 I'm still getting used to you and Jay being an official thing. 52 00:02:29,190 --> 00:02:32,193 It's like when I found out that dogs got periods. 53 00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:34,404 And I was like, "Huh?" 54 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,366 The fact that you even think you have a hickey 55 00:02:38,449 --> 00:02:40,451 means that Jay's mouth was on your neck. 56 00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:43,246 - So stuff's happening? - Stuff's happening. 57 00:02:43,913 --> 00:02:46,082 I got this big guy last night 58 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:48,751 while we were cuddled up on a beanbag under a blanket. 59 00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:50,962 Oh, I see. 60 00:02:52,088 --> 00:02:54,424 - So did you touch it? - Touch what? 61 00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:56,259 You don't ask that if you touched it. 62 00:02:56,968 --> 00:02:58,636 Oh, it? [chuckles] 63 00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:01,181 - Why would you even say that? - I don't know. 64 00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:04,559 Blanket plus bean bag usually equals touching it. 65 00:03:04,642 --> 00:03:06,352 It's simple sex math. 66 00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:10,106 I didn't know, um, things mean other things. 67 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,400 Everything means something, Leia. 68 00:03:12,483 --> 00:03:13,693 Don't start this with her. 69 00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:17,074 Leia, there are no rules to any of this. Don't let them get in your head. 70 00:03:17,113 --> 00:03:18,406 Thank you, Gwen. 71 00:03:18,489 --> 00:03:20,909 Just to be clear, I'm not gonna touch it. 72 00:03:22,076 --> 00:03:24,871 - D'you think he thinks I'm gonna touch it? - Touch what? 73 00:03:25,496 --> 00:03:28,041 The sky! [chuckles] With our... dreams. 74 00:03:31,794 --> 00:03:33,296 This is why I hate rain. 75 00:03:33,796 --> 00:03:35,089 [grunting] 76 00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:36,174 Just close it. 77 00:03:36,257 --> 00:03:37,257 Oh. 78 00:03:38,384 --> 00:03:39,677 [chuckles] 79 00:03:41,512 --> 00:03:42,512 Good call, babe. 80 00:03:43,097 --> 00:03:45,016 - [rock music playing] - One, two, three, four! 81 00:03:45,099 --> 00:03:47,101 ♪ Hangin' out down the street ♪ 82 00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:49,062 ♪ The same old thing we did last week ♪ 83 00:03:49,145 --> 00:03:51,397 ♪ Not a thing to do ♪ 84 00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:53,441 ♪ But talk to you ♪ 85 00:03:53,524 --> 00:03:54,692 ♪ We're all all right! ♪ 86 00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:56,069 ♪ We're all all right! ♪ 87 00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:58,696 [young woman] Hello, Wisconsin! 88 00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:01,699 Now you've got me thinking about everything I've done with Jay. 89 00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:04,702 Like, the other night, we shared a pudding cup. What does that mean? 90 00:04:04,786 --> 00:04:06,871 - Wait, one spoon or two? - One. 91 00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:08,039 You might be pregnant. 92 00:04:10,875 --> 00:04:13,461 Ah. Who wants to try some fancy candy? 93 00:04:13,544 --> 00:04:16,422 My dad sent me a whole box of cool stuff from Japan. 94 00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:19,425 He plays baseball over there. Kind of a big deal. 95 00:04:20,051 --> 00:04:22,011 He's the oldest player in the league. 96 00:04:22,095 --> 00:04:24,555 He does adult diaper commercials over there. 97 00:04:25,848 --> 00:04:27,600 I don't get why that's not cool. 98 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:29,102 Don't mind me, kids. 99 00:04:29,185 --> 00:04:31,771 I'm just gonna grab some of Red's junk from the back. 100 00:04:31,854 --> 00:04:33,564 I was never here. 101 00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:36,067 That's where we keep the stash. 102 00:04:36,150 --> 00:04:38,695 It's cool. Last time I hid it in this. 103 00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:44,492 No one's gonna look in here 'cause they don't have a dog anymore. 104 00:04:44,575 --> 00:04:48,162 Oh, oh. This has to go. We don't have a dog anymore. 105 00:04:50,581 --> 00:04:52,041 Granny has the stash! 106 00:04:53,501 --> 00:04:56,462 - Why did you just give it to her? - What was I supposed to do, Gwen? 107 00:04:56,546 --> 00:04:57,964 Not give it to her! 108 00:04:58,589 --> 00:04:59,674 Hang on, hang on. 109 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:02,176 I've always got your back, bro. 110 00:05:02,677 --> 00:05:04,137 But not now. That was terrible. 111 00:05:05,221 --> 00:05:06,973 Look, it's not a problem. 112 00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:09,100 I'll just go get it. 113 00:05:13,771 --> 00:05:16,316 Mrs. Forman, you have a lot of identical boxes. 114 00:05:17,692 --> 00:05:21,612 Oh, this isn't even the half of it. You should see the garage. 115 00:05:21,696 --> 00:05:23,197 [laughs] 116 00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:26,367 [forced laughter] 117 00:05:26,451 --> 00:05:27,952 We have a big problem. 118 00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:30,330 Which requires a big solution. 119 00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:31,664 Does anybody have one? 120 00:05:32,707 --> 00:05:34,459 We need to split up and look for it. 121 00:05:34,542 --> 00:05:36,878 Nikki and I will take upstairs. [clicks tongue] 122 00:05:39,672 --> 00:05:42,633 No, if you two are alone, you're just gonna find some dark corner 123 00:05:42,717 --> 00:05:44,010 to hump all over each other. 124 00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:46,512 Fine, Jay and I can go together. 125 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:48,890 If you guys are together, you'll just talk about 126 00:05:48,973 --> 00:05:52,352 your favorite sex scenes in Jean-Claude Van Damme movies. 127 00:05:52,935 --> 00:05:54,270 - Lionheart. - Bloodsport. 128 00:05:54,937 --> 00:05:56,481 [both] Hard Target! 129 00:05:59,442 --> 00:06:00,818 Nate and I will go upstairs. 130 00:06:00,902 --> 00:06:03,529 Ozzie, you and Jay go through the boxes in the garage. 131 00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:06,467 - Yeah, Leia and I will look down here. - But we know it's not down here. 132 00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:07,909 Then I guess we're done. 133 00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:11,954 Don't worry, Leia. I'm the right man for this job. 134 00:06:16,042 --> 00:06:17,460 [door opens, closes] 135 00:06:17,543 --> 00:06:19,045 What the hell was that? 136 00:06:19,837 --> 00:06:21,506 What? I kissed my boyfriend. 137 00:06:21,589 --> 00:06:23,591 No. What were you doing with your arms? 138 00:06:23,674 --> 00:06:26,469 They were sticking out behind you like a ski jumper. 139 00:06:26,552 --> 00:06:31,015 You got in my head, and now I don't know what means what or... where to touch him. 140 00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:33,601 Whatever. We have way bigger things to worry about now. 141 00:06:33,684 --> 00:06:34,894 I don't think we do! 142 00:06:34,977 --> 00:06:37,063 [rock music playing] 143 00:06:37,146 --> 00:06:38,564 Do you know what we should do? 144 00:06:38,648 --> 00:06:42,276 We should go to the cops and ask to borrow one of those drug-sniffing dogs. 145 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:43,861 How are we even related? 146 00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:46,489 We have the same mom. [snickers] 147 00:06:46,572 --> 00:06:47,990 Why do you always ask me that? 148 00:06:49,575 --> 00:06:50,451 Aww! 149 00:06:50,535 --> 00:06:52,787 You kids came up here to help me. 150 00:06:52,870 --> 00:06:54,414 You are so sweet. 151 00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:57,458 And you, I really need your muscles right now. 152 00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:59,627 [chuckles] Mrs. Forman, I... 153 00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:01,462 I have a girlfriend. 154 00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:03,423 Oh please. 155 00:07:03,506 --> 00:07:04,507 [laughs] 156 00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:07,009 You wouldn't know what to do with this. 157 00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:12,849 No. Red has a giant wooden moose in the upstairs closet. 158 00:07:12,932 --> 00:07:15,101 And I've been trying to get rid of it for years, 159 00:07:15,184 --> 00:07:17,145 but it's too heavy for me to lift. 160 00:07:17,228 --> 00:07:19,730 Oh sure. Don't ask me because you need a man to help. 161 00:07:19,814 --> 00:07:21,649 Oh, calm down, Eleanor Roosevelt. 162 00:07:21,732 --> 00:07:24,735 I just want the stupid thing out of the house. 163 00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:25,820 Okay. 164 00:07:25,903 --> 00:07:28,698 Go get the moose, and I'll keep helping down here. 165 00:07:28,781 --> 00:07:29,782 On it. 166 00:07:30,533 --> 00:07:33,661 Can you describe this wooden moose to me? 167 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:35,538 It's a moose. 168 00:07:39,041 --> 00:07:40,585 But made of wood. 169 00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:43,296 I'll do my best. 170 00:07:46,883 --> 00:07:48,426 This sucks. 171 00:07:48,509 --> 00:07:51,137 Yesterday I was totally comfortable kissing Jay. 172 00:07:51,220 --> 00:07:54,557 [chuckles] Now you look like a baby that doesn't want to get picked up. 173 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:55,640 I know what I did! 174 00:07:57,268 --> 00:07:59,645 Oh, I'm sorry. I feel bad. 175 00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:03,774 I was trying to give you advice, not break your brain. 176 00:08:04,692 --> 00:08:05,860 I need advice. 177 00:08:05,943 --> 00:08:08,446 Jay has a lot of experience. 178 00:08:08,529 --> 00:08:10,156 The closest I've come to having sex 179 00:08:10,239 --> 00:08:12,533 is when I got a front wedgie on a Slip 'N Slide. 180 00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:14,744 Yeah. You gotta go headfirst. 181 00:08:14,827 --> 00:08:15,828 I did. 182 00:08:16,454 --> 00:08:18,456 My friend's mom is a mechanical engineer. 183 00:08:18,539 --> 00:08:19,999 She was baffled. 184 00:08:20,583 --> 00:08:22,043 Look, don't overthink it. 185 00:08:22,126 --> 00:08:25,004 Just do what comes naturally. Except don't touch his hair. 186 00:08:25,087 --> 00:08:27,673 If I go near Nate's hair, it flips a switch in his pants. 187 00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:29,425 There's a switch? 188 00:08:29,926 --> 00:08:31,802 These boys are so complicated! 189 00:08:31,886 --> 00:08:33,221 They're really not. 190 00:08:33,930 --> 00:08:36,265 Just put your hands on his hips. 191 00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:39,185 It's close enough to the good stuff so he knows that you're interested, 192 00:08:39,268 --> 00:08:41,854 but far enough away so he knows you're not making a move. 193 00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:43,648 Got it. 194 00:08:43,731 --> 00:08:46,234 Lips are for hips like zippers are for zips. 195 00:08:47,735 --> 00:08:49,278 It's how I learned my state capitals. 196 00:08:49,987 --> 00:08:51,447 Never do that again. 197 00:08:53,407 --> 00:08:54,825 - Jackpot. - You found it? 198 00:08:55,618 --> 00:08:58,538 No, I found a whole box of old Halloween costumes. 199 00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:01,207 I think this is supposed to be a bee. 200 00:09:01,832 --> 00:09:04,460 Oh, Mrs. Forman, bless your heart. You tried. 201 00:09:04,961 --> 00:09:07,755 Ozzie, stop messing around. We're not playing dress-up. 202 00:09:07,838 --> 00:09:09,966 Then take off that old jacket you found. 203 00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:12,468 Come on. Makes me look like Christian Slater. 204 00:09:13,261 --> 00:09:15,429 We must be thinking of different Christian Slaters. 205 00:09:17,682 --> 00:09:18,766 [Ozzie] Oh look! 206 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:21,727 Oh! Sweet. You found it. 207 00:09:24,188 --> 00:09:28,484 You have had quite the adventure today, little baggie. Let's get you home. 208 00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:32,905 - What are you doing in my garage? - Uh... 209 00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:34,574 We were... waiting for you. 210 00:09:34,657 --> 00:09:35,741 You're late. 211 00:09:36,617 --> 00:09:38,494 Tell us about your day, Mr. Forman. 212 00:09:40,204 --> 00:09:42,832 All right, this is when you leave. 213 00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:46,085 And give me that jacket. 214 00:09:46,168 --> 00:09:51,299 I paid full price for that thing at Sears in 1964. 215 00:09:57,471 --> 00:09:58,973 Get out of my garage. 216 00:09:59,056 --> 00:10:00,600 You're basement people! 217 00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:04,020 [rock music playing] 218 00:10:05,479 --> 00:10:06,397 [Nate strains] 219 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:09,483 - Is this it? - No, it's the other one. 220 00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:10,943 Oh, my bad. 221 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:12,486 No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. 222 00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:13,779 [laughs] 223 00:10:13,863 --> 00:10:15,531 You can't do that with him. 224 00:10:16,115 --> 00:10:18,075 - That is big. - And heavy. 225 00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:19,410 And stupid. 226 00:10:23,914 --> 00:10:26,250 Wait... That's the shirt my dad sent me. 227 00:10:26,334 --> 00:10:28,461 You got stuff all over it and cut it up. 228 00:10:28,544 --> 00:10:30,713 It's too small for you, anyway. Just like our shower. 229 00:10:30,796 --> 00:10:33,596 I hear you banging around in there like a bear that fell in a dumpster. 230 00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:36,260 I take an athletic shower. 231 00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:39,680 And don't try to change the subject. You can't just touch my stuff. 232 00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,807 You mean like this? And this? And this? 233 00:10:41,891 --> 00:10:45,728 - Quit it, Gwen! - Okay, I understand why you're fighting. 234 00:10:45,811 --> 00:10:47,772 He... He does this to people. 235 00:10:47,855 --> 00:10:50,274 Let's just get him out! 236 00:10:50,358 --> 00:10:51,651 Get him out! 237 00:10:55,780 --> 00:10:57,698 - You're gonna pay. - You're being an idiot. 238 00:10:57,782 --> 00:10:59,116 Your face is being an idiot. 239 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:02,495 - That doesn't even make sense. - Yeah. It doesn't. 240 00:11:02,578 --> 00:11:03,454 [imitates explosion] 241 00:11:03,537 --> 00:11:06,916 [rock music playing] 242 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,794 Red... has the stash. 243 00:11:09,877 --> 00:11:13,047 Cool, cool. Yeah. Um, hang on one second. 244 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,258 [muffled scream] 245 00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:20,763 So what do we do now? 246 00:11:21,430 --> 00:11:22,431 It's okay. 247 00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,558 He doesn't even know he has it yet. 248 00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:26,101 Right, Ozzie? 249 00:11:26,435 --> 00:11:27,435 Has what? 250 00:11:27,895 --> 00:11:31,816 I'm just a sweet innocent kid who got caught up with some no-good riffraff. 251 00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:34,777 You save-yourself son of a bitch. 252 00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:37,488 I respect that. 253 00:11:39,323 --> 00:11:41,367 - Now, go get it. - We will. 254 00:11:41,450 --> 00:11:46,038 I just... wanted to come say goodbye to Leia in case I never saw her again. 255 00:11:46,622 --> 00:11:48,124 Aww. [laughs softly] 256 00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:50,084 Are we doing this? 257 00:12:02,346 --> 00:12:03,514 Uh... 258 00:12:04,598 --> 00:12:05,683 [Leia] Mm-hmm... 259 00:12:05,766 --> 00:12:08,352 Leia... move your hands. 260 00:12:10,771 --> 00:12:12,231 And we're back to that. 261 00:12:13,941 --> 00:12:16,569 Hi, Sherri. Listen. I'm gonna need more time. 262 00:12:16,652 --> 00:12:19,363 I don't know how much more I can stall. He's done everything. 263 00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:21,657 I think my hinges are quieter than yours. 264 00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:24,201 Well... I doubt that. 265 00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:25,453 [laughs] 266 00:12:25,536 --> 00:12:28,164 Just... Just make something up. Bye. 267 00:12:30,624 --> 00:12:32,251 [screaming] 268 00:12:32,334 --> 00:12:33,335 What? 269 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:36,797 I think I just saw a mouse. It was big. It looked half-rat! 270 00:12:36,881 --> 00:12:39,550 Well, it's about to be all dead. 271 00:12:39,633 --> 00:12:42,303 [rock music playing] 272 00:12:43,012 --> 00:12:44,847 Well, there's my big, strong boy. 273 00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:47,725 Again... I'm spoken for. 274 00:12:49,018 --> 00:12:50,019 Oh. 275 00:12:50,686 --> 00:12:51,687 What a shame. 276 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,485 - Look what I took from under your pillow. - What are you doing with that? 277 00:12:57,985 --> 00:13:00,154 She looks all tough, but she can't fall asleep 278 00:13:00,237 --> 00:13:01,530 without Frankie the Blankie. 279 00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:03,407 He needs me too. 280 00:13:04,283 --> 00:13:07,536 You touch my stuff, Frankie gets butt-flossed. 281 00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:09,955 - Frankie! - Hey. 282 00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:11,832 [Gwen grunting] 283 00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:13,209 - Get off! - No! 284 00:13:13,292 --> 00:13:14,293 [Nate grunting] 285 00:13:14,376 --> 00:13:16,170 Fine. Then I'm going to the bathroom. 286 00:13:16,253 --> 00:13:18,339 - Eww! I hate you! - I hate you! 287 00:13:19,757 --> 00:13:21,175 I hate you! 288 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:26,263 [rock music playing] 289 00:13:27,139 --> 00:13:29,725 There it is. Let's grab it and get out of here. 290 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:33,229 Wait! This feels too easy. What if it's a trap? 291 00:13:35,022 --> 00:13:36,148 You've seen too many car... 292 00:13:36,232 --> 00:13:37,858 - [sharp snap] - It's a trap! 293 00:13:37,942 --> 00:13:40,152 I knew it! [screams] 294 00:13:40,236 --> 00:13:41,445 [trap snaps] 295 00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:43,072 [groans in pain] 296 00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:44,155 Freeze! 297 00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:46,742 [trap snaps] 298 00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:47,910 - Damn it! - [trap snaps] 299 00:13:47,993 --> 00:13:49,036 Ow! 300 00:13:50,287 --> 00:13:51,747 This place is hell! 301 00:13:53,165 --> 00:13:55,584 This is almost as bad as the Slip 'N Slide incident. 302 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,586 My neighbor Connie had to coach me through 303 00:13:58,087 --> 00:13:59,129 getting it out. 304 00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:02,341 Wow. My neighbors don't even wave hello. 305 00:14:02,967 --> 00:14:05,177 I hate how weird everything is. 306 00:14:05,261 --> 00:14:08,138 I wish I could just fast-forward to where you and Nate are. 307 00:14:08,222 --> 00:14:09,974 Where, like, things are easy. [scoffs] 308 00:14:10,057 --> 00:14:12,226 Believe me, it's not always easy. 309 00:14:13,644 --> 00:14:16,438 Nate and I aren't really on the same page about our futures. 310 00:14:16,522 --> 00:14:20,317 Now, we're having the dumbest fights about everything. 311 00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,695 Like what to do if there's a tornado. 312 00:14:22,778 --> 00:14:24,780 I say hide in a basement. 313 00:14:25,739 --> 00:14:26,739 He wants to ride one. 314 00:14:27,658 --> 00:14:31,036 I'm just saying, things are never going to be perfect. 315 00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:35,666 And as for what happened with Jay, sure, it was bad. 316 00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:38,270 But it's not gonna be as bad as when we tell everyone. 317 00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:39,545 Thanks. 318 00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:42,089 - We got it. - You did? 319 00:14:42,756 --> 00:14:44,258 Might have cost me a toe. 320 00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:46,969 I'm afraid to look, but my sock feels wet. 321 00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:50,681 Hey, so, about earlier. 322 00:14:50,764 --> 00:14:53,517 What? I don't even know what you're talking about. 323 00:14:54,101 --> 00:14:56,687 Uh, that's all he talked about. 324 00:14:58,314 --> 00:15:01,692 I just got in my head about us, and I'm worried I made things weird. 325 00:15:01,775 --> 00:15:04,862 Can we just forget about it and go back to the way it was? 326 00:15:04,945 --> 00:15:06,655 Like when you gave me this huge hickey? 327 00:15:07,656 --> 00:15:10,034 - Where is it again? - The point is... 328 00:15:11,035 --> 00:15:13,120 I just want things to be fun and comfortable again. 329 00:15:13,871 --> 00:15:15,998 Well... I want what you want. 330 00:15:16,582 --> 00:15:18,584 Good, because this is what I want. 331 00:15:19,668 --> 00:15:20,586 Ew, your toe! 332 00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:21,795 Ooh, I wanna see. 333 00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:24,840 You kissed my ear. 334 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,175 Stop turning! 335 00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:28,969 [rock music playing] 336 00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:31,597 Stop breathing on me. 337 00:15:33,807 --> 00:15:36,018 - [loud, hissing exhale] - Okay, that's enough. 338 00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:39,021 What's your problem? Come on. Chop-chop. 339 00:15:39,104 --> 00:15:40,105 Fine. 340 00:15:41,732 --> 00:15:44,944 [scoffs] That wasn't just any shirt. It's from my dad. 341 00:15:45,027 --> 00:15:47,154 - But it didn't even fit you. - It doesn't matter. 342 00:15:47,237 --> 00:15:50,366 He went out and bought it and... and put it in the box. 343 00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:53,118 His hands were on it. [sighs] 344 00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:56,163 You wouldn't understand. You see your dad way more than I do. 345 00:15:56,246 --> 00:15:58,082 Yeah, but I still miss him. 346 00:15:58,165 --> 00:16:01,418 I only ever get to see him when he comes through town on his way to another city. 347 00:16:01,502 --> 00:16:03,170 Circus performer? 348 00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:06,382 How is that your first guess? 349 00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:09,551 He's a truck driver. 350 00:16:10,928 --> 00:16:14,348 But, Nate, if I'd known how you felt, I never would have touched it. 351 00:16:14,431 --> 00:16:15,432 Or cut it up. 352 00:16:16,141 --> 00:16:18,644 Or let cars run over it to make it look vintage. 353 00:16:20,020 --> 00:16:21,438 It's fine. It's dumb. 354 00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:23,107 No, it's not dumb. 355 00:16:23,190 --> 00:16:24,525 It sucks for both of us. 356 00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,070 You idiot. You made me cry. 357 00:16:29,738 --> 00:16:31,573 - I hate you. - I hate you too. 358 00:16:33,575 --> 00:16:34,952 I miss my dad too. 359 00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:40,082 He took me to the dog track on my tenth birthday. 360 00:16:40,582 --> 00:16:42,626 And he gave me a sip of his beer, 361 00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:45,462 and I barfed up my popcorn, 362 00:16:45,546 --> 00:16:48,048 and it still looked like popcorn. 363 00:16:51,510 --> 00:16:53,762 Red's coming! He's right behind me! 364 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,266 He's got that cane, so maybe we've got some time. 365 00:16:58,183 --> 00:16:59,727 Nate, moose, now. 366 00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:00,810 Let me help you. 367 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:03,105 - Thanks, sis. [chuckles] - I got you, big bro. 368 00:17:03,689 --> 00:17:06,150 Why are my kids being nice? Did they get into your wine? 369 00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:09,403 No. We... We had an emotional moment. 370 00:17:09,903 --> 00:17:11,697 They both were missing their dads. 371 00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:12,780 Oh. 372 00:17:12,823 --> 00:17:15,159 Man, that's always a gut punch. 373 00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:17,036 No. It wasn't the end of the world. 374 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:20,998 No, no. Nate's father sent him a T-shirt. It was too small. 375 00:17:21,081 --> 00:17:22,833 Gwen took it. It's okay now. 376 00:17:22,916 --> 00:17:24,293 Frickin' Brian. 377 00:17:26,086 --> 00:17:29,006 I try to do whatever I can to make sure my kids never feel bad, 378 00:17:29,089 --> 00:17:31,216 but sometimes things slip through my cracks. 379 00:17:34,845 --> 00:17:36,972 That's... That's a lot of numbers. 380 00:17:39,683 --> 00:17:40,893 Brian, it's me. 381 00:17:41,769 --> 00:17:43,854 What the hell do I care what time it is in Japan? 382 00:17:43,937 --> 00:17:45,647 I'm in Wisconsin. [scoffs] 383 00:17:46,231 --> 00:17:48,734 Yeah, I... 384 00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:55,032 You need to send your son a shirt that actually fits. 385 00:17:55,115 --> 00:17:57,117 He's as tall as your sister now. 386 00:17:57,201 --> 00:17:59,495 And tell that broad in your bed to close her mouth. 387 00:17:59,578 --> 00:18:01,080 I can hear her snorin'! 388 00:18:01,705 --> 00:18:03,082 She's on the phone with Japan. 389 00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:04,458 Japan? 390 00:18:04,958 --> 00:18:05,958 Sayonara. 391 00:18:06,001 --> 00:18:09,797 [funky rock music playing] 392 00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:12,382 Now, this is you spend a dainy ray. 393 00:18:13,550 --> 00:18:14,551 Rainy dray. 394 00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:17,096 Day. 395 00:18:18,430 --> 00:18:20,099 Hey, be careful. 396 00:18:20,182 --> 00:18:22,476 It's bad luck to open a brella inside. 397 00:18:24,144 --> 00:18:25,145 Hold up. 398 00:18:26,021 --> 00:18:27,231 Say that word again. 399 00:18:28,023 --> 00:18:28,941 Brella. 400 00:18:29,024 --> 00:18:31,864 Like, when it's raining, and Mom can never remember what they're called, 401 00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:35,989 and she's always like, "Take your, um... brella." 402 00:18:36,073 --> 00:18:37,950 [both laughing] 403 00:18:38,033 --> 00:18:39,201 No way! 404 00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:43,372 [both chuckling] 405 00:18:44,498 --> 00:18:45,498 Brella. 406 00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:52,131 Wait, is he hot? 407 00:18:53,215 --> 00:18:54,508 Uh... 408 00:18:54,591 --> 00:18:55,591 Yeah. 409 00:18:59,847 --> 00:19:01,431 Hey, it stopped raining. 410 00:19:02,766 --> 00:19:05,352 [gasps] She's right. Let's get outta here. 411 00:19:05,435 --> 00:19:07,437 ["No Rain" by Blind Melon playing] 412 00:19:12,401 --> 00:19:18,031 ♪ All I can say Is that my life is pretty plain ♪ 413 00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:23,120 ♪ I like watching the puddles Gather rain ♪ 414 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:30,335 ♪ You know I'd like to keep My cheeks dry today, hey ♪ 415 00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:35,883 ♪ So stay with me and I'll have it made ♪ 416 00:19:36,967 --> 00:19:42,681 ♪ And I don't understand Why I sleep all day ♪ 417 00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:47,477 ♪ And I start to complain That there's no rain... ♪ 418 00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:48,937 [song fades out] 419 00:19:49,021 --> 00:19:51,023 Do you guys remember coming out here? 420 00:19:51,773 --> 00:19:52,773 No. 421 00:19:53,108 --> 00:19:56,653 But I'm glad we did. It ended up being a pretty solid day. 422 00:19:58,989 --> 00:20:00,449 I hope this never ends. 423 00:20:00,532 --> 00:20:02,659 Kids, your school schedules came! 424 00:20:02,743 --> 00:20:04,661 Summer is finally over. 425 00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:06,580 All this is gonna end. 426 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:11,543 [rock music playing] 427 00:20:12,502 --> 00:20:15,422 [rock music playing]