1 00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:11,302 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:23,106 (birds chirping) 3 00:00:23,189 --> 00:00:26,818 -ALAN: Candace! Candace? -(chain jingling) 4 00:00:26,901 --> 00:00:30,113 Get down here! Now! 5 00:00:31,656 --> 00:00:34,159 Sam just left. He is going to kill his father. 6 00:00:34,242 --> 00:00:36,161 -What did you say to him? -He decided 7 00:00:36,244 --> 00:00:38,121 that killing his father would make him better. 8 00:00:38,204 --> 00:00:39,581 Would it? 9 00:00:39,664 --> 00:00:41,374 Well, no, I don't think so. 10 00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:43,084 He could come back here and... 11 00:00:43,168 --> 00:00:44,711 Are you sure it won't work? 12 00:00:44,794 --> 00:00:50,216 (sighs) Candace, I understand that this man was brutal to you. 13 00:00:50,300 --> 00:00:52,510 But I'm supposed to care what happens to him? 14 00:00:52,594 --> 00:00:55,597 Well... yes. Yes, a little. 15 00:00:56,973 --> 00:00:58,475 (doorbell rings) 16 00:01:11,696 --> 00:01:13,490 Can I come in? 17 00:01:26,586 --> 00:01:28,379 You hungry? 18 00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:43,061 (footsteps descending stairs) 19 00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:54,656 I've been in this position many times. 20 00:01:54,739 --> 00:01:56,950 There's nothing you can do. 21 00:01:58,326 --> 00:02:01,955 I usually have a beer and try to relax. 22 00:02:10,588 --> 00:02:12,382 (chain jingling) 23 00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:15,009 (knife chopping) 24 00:02:24,561 --> 00:02:26,104 Bathroom? 25 00:02:26,187 --> 00:02:28,189 Uh, around the corner. 26 00:02:47,375 --> 00:02:49,043 (sighs) 27 00:02:49,127 --> 00:02:50,920 (urinating) 28 00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:05,560 You think I'm some sort of a monster, too. 29 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:10,231 But I'm not. 30 00:03:11,274 --> 00:03:13,651 I'm like anybody else. 31 00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:18,323 When he's... out, like now... 32 00:03:18,406 --> 00:03:20,783 I'm so scared for him. 33 00:03:20,867 --> 00:03:25,622 I'm so sad for the life he's living. 34 00:03:30,251 --> 00:03:35,298 But the families... the people he does this to... 35 00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:39,636 I make up stories in my head about them. 36 00:03:39,719 --> 00:03:42,138 I live it, in a way. 37 00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:46,184 I picture... them as babies, 38 00:03:46,267 --> 00:03:49,020 with their mothers holding them. 39 00:03:49,103 --> 00:03:52,190 Their fathers playing with them on the floor. 40 00:03:54,817 --> 00:03:58,446 These poor men. 41 00:03:58,529 --> 00:04:01,115 But you won't call the police? 42 00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:06,329 Candace... you won't save them from this? 43 00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:10,124 I can't. 44 00:04:12,126 --> 00:04:14,254 I cannot. 45 00:04:21,552 --> 00:04:22,637 God. 46 00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:29,352 (chain jingling) 47 00:04:36,192 --> 00:04:39,570 (plates clinking) 48 00:04:43,324 --> 00:04:44,492 (sighs) 49 00:04:56,004 --> 00:04:59,048 Why did you used to hit me so much when I was a kid? 50 00:05:02,218 --> 00:05:03,678 (sighs heavily) 51 00:05:05,430 --> 00:05:06,806 I don't know. 52 00:05:10,935 --> 00:05:15,231 How did it make you feel? When you...? 53 00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:17,817 What? 54 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:24,407 When you used to hit me all the time. 55 00:05:24,490 --> 00:05:27,118 How did it make you feel? 56 00:05:27,201 --> 00:05:31,456 (sighs) I don't know. 57 00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:34,000 Bad, I guess. 58 00:05:35,543 --> 00:05:37,712 You were a weird kid. 59 00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:41,632 You couldn't follow rules, you couldn't play games, 60 00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:44,427 you didn't have any friends. 61 00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:47,347 And your mother was reading all her books, 62 00:05:47,430 --> 00:05:50,600 telling me it was all my fault you were like that. 63 00:05:52,226 --> 00:05:54,562 Anyway, I'm sorry. 64 00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:06,616 (grunting) 65 00:06:13,706 --> 00:06:15,375 (straining) 66 00:06:31,766 --> 00:06:34,143 (wheezes) 67 00:06:42,485 --> 00:06:45,071 My therapist said not to kill you. 68 00:06:51,119 --> 00:06:52,578 And then I left. 69 00:06:54,330 --> 00:06:55,832 How do you feel? 70 00:06:58,042 --> 00:07:03,548 I was choking him and I could feel him disappearing, 71 00:07:03,631 --> 00:07:05,633 and I stopped. 72 00:07:07,552 --> 00:07:09,470 It was like I didn't want to. 73 00:07:11,013 --> 00:07:12,640 Why not? 74 00:07:12,723 --> 00:07:14,934 I-I don't know. 75 00:07:15,017 --> 00:07:18,062 I mean, he said he was sorry, but fuck him, right? 76 00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:22,066 I just, I hate him so much 77 00:07:22,150 --> 00:07:24,861 and usually that feeling, it makes me want to 78 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:27,655 go ahead and... 79 00:07:27,738 --> 00:07:31,117 But I was on top of him, and I hated him. 80 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:37,290 And this time, that feeling, it-it made me not want to. 81 00:07:37,373 --> 00:07:39,792 I... 82 00:07:41,043 --> 00:07:42,837 Hmm. 83 00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:45,173 Do you know why I didn't do it? 84 00:07:47,425 --> 00:07:50,011 What was different, between your father, 85 00:07:50,094 --> 00:07:52,138 and everyone else that you've hurt? 86 00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:55,641 I don't know. 87 00:07:55,725 --> 00:07:58,311 What's the obvious difference? 88 00:07:59,937 --> 00:08:01,481 He hurt me the most. 89 00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:04,150 Okay, good. What else? 90 00:08:04,233 --> 00:08:07,236 What's the most obvious difference? 91 00:08:10,948 --> 00:08:13,159 He's my father. 92 00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:15,536 Right. 93 00:08:15,620 --> 00:08:17,788 Sam, you were on top of him... 94 00:08:17,872 --> 00:08:21,876 the one who treated you like this. 95 00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:25,880 If you killed him, you'd be doing it, too. 96 00:08:25,963 --> 00:08:27,340 Acting just like him. 97 00:08:27,423 --> 00:08:29,133 Being just like him. 98 00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:30,468 You hate that part of him. 99 00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:33,262 You are trying to be different. 100 00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:36,015 Trying to get rid of that ugly part of him 101 00:08:36,098 --> 00:08:37,975 that lives inside of you. 102 00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:42,730 You were right to confront your father. 103 00:08:42,813 --> 00:08:44,857 But you didn't need to kill him. 104 00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:48,194 You needed to not kill him. 105 00:08:49,237 --> 00:08:52,740 This is it, Sam. 106 00:08:52,823 --> 00:08:54,158 It is a major breakthrough, 107 00:08:54,242 --> 00:08:57,495 even if you're not quite feeling it yet. 108 00:08:57,578 --> 00:09:01,541 Not killing your father is... 109 00:09:01,624 --> 00:09:03,960 You wanted to change. 110 00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:07,338 Look at you. You've changed. 111 00:09:08,881 --> 00:09:11,300 How does it feel? 112 00:09:12,635 --> 00:09:15,054 Okay. I guess. 113 00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:18,015 It's everything that we have been working towards. 114 00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:21,978 You-you stopped yourself. This is extraordinary. 115 00:09:27,692 --> 00:09:29,110 Thanks. 116 00:09:29,193 --> 00:09:32,196 (takes deep breath) 117 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,115 -(Sam laughs softly) -Hmm. 118 00:09:35,449 --> 00:09:37,910 (exhales, laughs) 119 00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:42,790 I'm gonna go and get some dinner. 120 00:09:42,873 --> 00:09:45,209 Uh, is there anything in particular that you'd... 121 00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:47,545 I'm-I'm not really hungry right now. 122 00:09:47,628 --> 00:09:50,965 I, um... Sam... 123 00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:57,138 It's time to let me go home. 124 00:09:58,389 --> 00:10:00,182 You're ready. 125 00:10:01,309 --> 00:10:03,519 And I need to get back to my family. 126 00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:10,151 Sometimes therapists talk with their patients 127 00:10:10,234 --> 00:10:11,736 about their own lives. 128 00:10:11,819 --> 00:10:15,698 Because... well, you know, we're all human beings. 129 00:10:15,781 --> 00:10:19,118 We all are struggling, every last one of us. 130 00:10:19,201 --> 00:10:23,372 So... I want you to understand a few things about me. 131 00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:26,167 You have been struggling with your father. 132 00:10:26,250 --> 00:10:28,169 And you just had a big breakthrough. 133 00:10:28,252 --> 00:10:32,340 I'm in the middle of a struggle with my son, too. 134 00:10:32,423 --> 00:10:36,093 And I need to get back to him for our breakthrough. 135 00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:40,056 I did a lot of damage to my son, too. 136 00:10:40,139 --> 00:10:42,975 I know it's not the same as what your father did. 137 00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:49,148 But, Sam... people don't deserve to die 138 00:10:49,231 --> 00:10:51,400 for falling short. 139 00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,611 No matter how short. 140 00:10:53,694 --> 00:10:58,449 We're all... broken vessels. 141 00:11:01,243 --> 00:11:03,663 I need to get back to my son. 142 00:11:05,873 --> 00:11:08,793 I want you to come see me in my office for regular sessions, 143 00:11:08,876 --> 00:11:10,294 every day at first, 144 00:11:10,378 --> 00:11:13,631 but pretty soon we can go to three days a week. 145 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,717 I have enormous faith in you. 146 00:11:18,719 --> 00:11:20,096 I also want to address 147 00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:22,640 your completely understandable concern, I assume, 148 00:11:22,723 --> 00:11:25,267 that, if you let me go, I will turn you in. 149 00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:29,438 As a therapist, I have a legal and ethical obligation 150 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:31,399 to keep your confidence. 151 00:11:31,482 --> 00:11:34,652 Including any, um, 152 00:11:34,735 --> 00:11:37,113 crimes that you may have committed in the past. 153 00:11:37,196 --> 00:11:41,784 It only gets thorny if you are clearly going to kill somebody. 154 00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:43,577 And if, at some point in the future, 155 00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:46,539 you have an overwhelming urge to kill again, 156 00:11:46,622 --> 00:11:49,125 and you don't think you'll be able to control it, 157 00:11:49,208 --> 00:11:51,085 that will be the moment for us 158 00:11:51,168 --> 00:11:53,879 to find a therapeutic institution for you. 159 00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:56,048 But I don't see that happening. 160 00:11:56,132 --> 00:12:00,720 I think that, by not killing your father, 161 00:12:00,803 --> 00:12:03,931 you have demonstrated great progress 162 00:12:04,014 --> 00:12:06,183 and likely permanent change. 163 00:12:08,227 --> 00:12:09,895 I'm really proud of you. 164 00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:13,774 I am proud of the progress that you have made. 165 00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:18,279 And I think that you will continue to make progress. 166 00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:23,993 (crickets chirping) 167 00:12:30,082 --> 00:12:32,084 ♪ ♪ 168 00:12:55,065 --> 00:12:57,067 ♪ ♪ 169 00:13:17,421 --> 00:13:19,089 (engine starts) 170 00:13:26,263 --> 00:13:29,391 (truck approaching) 171 00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:32,353 (engine turns off) 172 00:13:32,436 --> 00:13:34,063 (truck door closes) 173 00:13:35,856 --> 00:13:37,483 (tailgate opens) 174 00:13:37,566 --> 00:13:39,276 (scraping) 175 00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:46,700 (creaking, thumping) 176 00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:51,747 (chain jingling) 177 00:13:54,416 --> 00:13:57,002 (Sam grunting) 178 00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:20,693 (grunts) 179 00:14:26,949 --> 00:14:28,242 (grunts) 180 00:14:47,845 --> 00:14:49,680 I'll be right back. 181 00:14:54,643 --> 00:14:56,937 ♪ ♪ 182 00:15:01,817 --> 00:15:03,611 (Sam grunting) 183 00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:14,663 (grunts) 184 00:15:33,974 --> 00:15:36,226 I get what you've been saying. 185 00:15:36,310 --> 00:15:38,103 I've been rushing you. 186 00:15:38,187 --> 00:15:40,898 Because I want to get better. 187 00:15:40,981 --> 00:15:44,526 But therapy takes time. 188 00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:48,530 Years, you said, sometimes. 189 00:15:51,241 --> 00:15:55,329 So, I'll get a TV and... 190 00:15:55,412 --> 00:15:57,998 I can stock the fridge with anything you want. 191 00:16:09,009 --> 00:16:11,345 (door closes) 192 00:16:17,101 --> 00:16:19,395 It's a miracle that everyone who was beaten like that 193 00:16:19,478 --> 00:16:21,897 doesn't become a serial killer. 194 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:24,733 Why wouldn't they, after suffering like that? 195 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:30,197 It's like an effort to turn them into a serial killer 196 00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:32,449 that doesn't always work. 197 00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:34,994 That poor kid... 198 00:16:35,077 --> 00:16:37,621 with all of it... 199 00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:42,084 he somehow managed to not kill his father. 200 00:16:42,167 --> 00:16:45,129 Maybe this fucking therapy is working after all. 201 00:16:45,212 --> 00:16:49,550 We know this story. He needs a replacement father. 202 00:16:49,633 --> 00:16:52,636 That's why he wants to keep you here for the next ten years. 203 00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:56,181 He understands, maybe intuitively, that he needs 204 00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:58,183 to do it again. 205 00:16:58,267 --> 00:17:01,562 To relive his life with a different model. 206 00:17:01,645 --> 00:17:05,441 Well, I'm not spending the next ten years down here. 207 00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:08,652 No, you're not. 208 00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:15,951 (exhales) 209 00:17:27,629 --> 00:17:29,298 (chain jingling) 210 00:17:48,192 --> 00:17:50,194 ♪ ♪ 211 00:18:09,338 --> 00:18:11,340 ♪ ♪ 212 00:18:31,568 --> 00:18:33,570 ♪ ♪ 213 00:18:44,623 --> 00:18:47,584 (takes deep breath) 214 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,633 A little meshuggener, maybe. 215 00:18:54,716 --> 00:18:56,135 (laughs softly) 216 00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:06,603 (drops pen) 217 00:19:07,771 --> 00:19:09,064 (sighs) 218 00:19:30,002 --> 00:19:31,920 Sam? 219 00:19:32,963 --> 00:19:34,923 Sam, could you come out here, please? 220 00:20:03,577 --> 00:20:08,582 Sam, I don't think... 221 00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:16,673 I don't think that I said what really 222 00:20:16,757 --> 00:20:19,509 needed to be said yesterday. 223 00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:24,681 It has been a problem down here for me, 224 00:20:24,765 --> 00:20:28,393 to always know exactly how to communicate with you. 225 00:20:28,477 --> 00:20:31,230 And to know what I'm feeling. 226 00:20:32,564 --> 00:20:35,817 I have something to say that may be difficult to hear. 227 00:20:35,901 --> 00:20:37,986 That is part of this process, though, 228 00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:40,405 honestly sharing the truth, 229 00:20:40,489 --> 00:20:42,532 even if it's hard. 230 00:20:48,121 --> 00:20:49,915 You brought me down here, 231 00:20:49,998 --> 00:20:53,460 and you asked me to treat you, and I did. 232 00:20:56,171 --> 00:20:58,465 And I can't do it anymore. 233 00:21:00,467 --> 00:21:03,637 I have done the most I can. 234 00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:06,890 And I am telling you, in my professional opinion, 235 00:21:06,974 --> 00:21:11,103 and I consider this to be a near certainty, 236 00:21:11,186 --> 00:21:15,941 for you to get better, you need to be physically stopped 237 00:21:16,024 --> 00:21:18,193 from acting out your compulsion. 238 00:21:18,277 --> 00:21:22,364 Being physically prevented from hurting anyone else 239 00:21:22,447 --> 00:21:26,451 is what will give you the freedom to actually heal 240 00:21:26,535 --> 00:21:28,495 your heart and your mind. 241 00:21:28,578 --> 00:21:31,290 It's what will give you the space to heal 242 00:21:31,373 --> 00:21:32,874 what your father did to you. 243 00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:35,627 As much as it can be, Sam. 244 00:21:35,711 --> 00:21:38,672 That kind of pain never heals entirely. 245 00:21:38,755 --> 00:21:43,385 But you can do enough of it to allow you to live a better life. 246 00:21:44,803 --> 00:21:48,140 Sam, I have so much respect for what you're trying to do. 247 00:21:48,223 --> 00:21:49,516 It's very brave. 248 00:21:49,599 --> 00:21:52,894 In the whole history of people who have struggled 249 00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:54,563 with what you're struggling with, 250 00:21:54,646 --> 00:21:57,232 I bet you stand alone 251 00:21:57,316 --> 00:21:59,860 in the strength of your efforts to change. 252 00:22:01,778 --> 00:22:04,156 (sighs) And... 253 00:22:06,491 --> 00:22:09,828 ...it's time to turn yourself in. 254 00:22:09,911 --> 00:22:12,706 Call the police and turn yourself in. 255 00:22:12,789 --> 00:22:16,668 I now know, apart from anything having to do with me, 256 00:22:16,752 --> 00:22:19,546 this is the only way for you. 257 00:22:22,549 --> 00:22:24,843 Our therapy is over. 258 00:22:25,886 --> 00:22:27,846 You need to make a choice. 259 00:22:27,929 --> 00:22:30,474 I'm making one, and you have to make one, too. 260 00:22:30,557 --> 00:22:34,394 My choice is that I am not doing therapy with you anymore. 261 00:22:34,478 --> 00:22:39,483 Your choice-- you can turn yourself in, 262 00:22:39,566 --> 00:22:43,195 or you can end this the other way. 263 00:22:46,448 --> 00:22:49,451 I don't want to do that. 264 00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:50,786 Either one. 265 00:22:50,869 --> 00:22:53,997 I know. But it's time. 266 00:22:54,081 --> 00:22:57,959 And I'm not going to live down here like a pet. 267 00:23:03,757 --> 00:23:05,967 ♪ ♪ 268 00:23:12,349 --> 00:23:14,017 (door closes) 269 00:23:17,312 --> 00:23:18,730 (sighs) 270 00:23:20,399 --> 00:23:22,275 (keys jingling) 271 00:23:33,620 --> 00:23:34,913 (door slides closed) 272 00:23:34,996 --> 00:23:36,331 (footsteps departing) 273 00:23:36,415 --> 00:23:38,625 (gate creaks) 274 00:23:38,750 --> 00:23:40,752 (birds chirping) 275 00:23:49,136 --> 00:23:51,138 ♪ ♪ 276 00:24:10,907 --> 00:24:13,368 (truck approaching) 277 00:24:15,579 --> 00:24:17,122 (engine turns off) 278 00:24:17,205 --> 00:24:20,542 (truck door opens, closes) 279 00:24:20,625 --> 00:24:23,086 (door opens, closes in distance) 280 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:37,267 ♪ ♪ 281 00:24:50,780 --> 00:24:52,574 (door opens) 282 00:25:10,008 --> 00:25:11,927 Thank you. 283 00:25:16,556 --> 00:25:18,225 I know you want to go home... 284 00:25:18,308 --> 00:25:23,188 but... he's not ready. 285 00:25:23,271 --> 00:25:25,357 He's not. 286 00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:29,736 Candace, this needs to end now. 287 00:25:30,779 --> 00:25:34,574 No matter what happens, we can't leave anything unsaid. 288 00:25:37,077 --> 00:25:39,913 This is going to be hard to hear, 289 00:25:39,996 --> 00:25:42,123 and I want you to know that I am saying it 290 00:25:42,207 --> 00:25:43,959 not just in my best interests, 291 00:25:44,042 --> 00:25:46,253 but in yours and Sam's as well. 292 00:25:48,630 --> 00:25:53,176 When he was a boy and his father was abusing him, 293 00:25:53,260 --> 00:25:56,137 you didn't take any steps to stop it. 294 00:25:57,222 --> 00:26:01,226 You didn't leave or get help. 295 00:26:01,309 --> 00:26:04,312 It wasn't your fault, you didn't know what to do. 296 00:26:05,355 --> 00:26:08,316 But you did not protect him. 297 00:26:11,111 --> 00:26:14,489 You did not protect your son. 298 00:26:24,291 --> 00:26:27,711 (sniffling) 299 00:26:27,794 --> 00:26:29,796 (sobs, sniffles) 300 00:26:29,879 --> 00:26:31,756 -Ah! What are you doing? -Sam! Sam?! 301 00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:33,800 Ow, ow! Stop. What are you doing, Dr. Strauss? 302 00:26:33,883 --> 00:26:35,969 Sam, come downstairs right now! Stop! 303 00:26:36,052 --> 00:26:38,388 I am sorry to be in this position. 304 00:26:38,471 --> 00:26:40,640 I don't want to be doing this. 305 00:26:40,724 --> 00:26:42,475 I care about you, Sam, I really do. 306 00:26:42,559 --> 00:26:44,561 But-- No, no! Stop! 307 00:26:44,644 --> 00:26:46,521 But I will kill her if you don't call the police. 308 00:26:46,605 --> 00:26:47,731 Sam, I... 309 00:26:47,814 --> 00:26:49,441 Do it, Sam, 310 00:26:49,524 --> 00:26:50,900 -or I will cut her throat. -Sam, please. 311 00:26:50,984 --> 00:26:52,527 -Dr. Strauss, you... -ALAN: I don't want to. 312 00:26:52,611 --> 00:26:55,238 I don't want to, Sam. What I want is for you to call 911, 313 00:26:55,322 --> 00:26:58,450 and turn yourself in, you have to. Turn yourself in! 314 00:26:58,533 --> 00:26:59,826 -Or I will do it! -He's just bluffing, Mom. 315 00:26:59,909 --> 00:27:01,244 All he wants to do is get out of here. 316 00:27:01,328 --> 00:27:03,121 I am not, Sam. Call 911! 317 00:27:03,204 --> 00:27:04,789 I-I don't-- I don't believe you... 318 00:27:04,873 --> 00:27:06,374 I am not bluffing, Sam! 319 00:27:06,458 --> 00:27:08,084 I am going to kill her. 320 00:27:08,168 --> 00:27:10,503 You said we shouldn't interrupt each other down here! 321 00:27:10,587 --> 00:27:13,465 Goddamn it, we let each other finish! 322 00:27:18,386 --> 00:27:20,972 You... you said I was getting better. 323 00:27:21,056 --> 00:27:23,642 You-- I believed you. 324 00:27:23,725 --> 00:27:25,727 I told you last night. You cannot get better 325 00:27:25,810 --> 00:27:28,271 unless you are stopped from acting out your compulsions. 326 00:27:28,355 --> 00:27:30,940 That is the only way out for you. 327 00:27:31,024 --> 00:27:33,443 This is the only way out for me. 328 00:27:37,197 --> 00:27:39,324 Make your choice. 329 00:27:39,407 --> 00:27:42,160 I don't want to. 330 00:27:42,243 --> 00:27:46,164 Then your mother's going to die. And you'll kill me. 331 00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:51,670 I don't think you're the kind of man that can even do it. 332 00:27:55,298 --> 00:27:56,424 (Candace screams) 333 00:27:58,009 --> 00:27:59,427 (high-pitched ringing) 334 00:28:08,603 --> 00:28:11,898 (distorted singing) 335 00:28:11,981 --> 00:28:13,983 ♪ ♪ 336 00:28:23,952 --> 00:28:25,078 CHAVA: Alan? 337 00:28:25,161 --> 00:28:26,621 (whimpers) 338 00:28:26,705 --> 00:28:27,747 Alan? 339 00:28:27,831 --> 00:28:29,749 -(gasps) -(children chattering) 340 00:28:29,833 --> 00:28:30,917 Are you okay? 341 00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:33,211 (sighs) Just a bad dream. 342 00:28:33,294 --> 00:28:35,880 (playful chatter continues) 343 00:28:35,964 --> 00:28:37,507 (sighs) 344 00:28:37,590 --> 00:28:41,386 About when you were... away? 345 00:28:42,637 --> 00:28:43,930 Not exactly. 346 00:28:44,013 --> 00:28:46,224 Then what was it? 347 00:28:47,934 --> 00:28:50,854 I'll tell you in about ten years. 348 00:28:50,937 --> 00:28:53,106 EZRA: Keep your stuff together, here we go. 349 00:28:53,189 --> 00:28:55,734 Everyone, let's go. It's dinnertime. 350 00:29:07,746 --> 00:29:09,205 I'm just saying, I don't know 351 00:29:09,289 --> 00:29:10,582 how Shmuel ended up being the coach. 352 00:29:10,665 --> 00:29:11,916 Shush. Dov likes him. 353 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:13,626 You can't shield him from the truth. 354 00:29:13,710 --> 00:29:15,086 I'm not so sure about that. 355 00:29:15,170 --> 00:29:16,254 Coach Shmuel was captain 356 00:29:16,337 --> 00:29:17,672 of the intermural baseball team 357 00:29:17,756 --> 00:29:19,299 -at UMass. -Yes, we know. 358 00:29:19,382 --> 00:29:21,050 We all know. That's my point. 359 00:29:21,134 --> 00:29:23,428 (chuckles) 360 00:29:24,596 --> 00:29:25,722 Thank you. 361 00:29:27,390 --> 00:29:29,517 (singing in Hebrew) 362 00:29:29,601 --> 00:29:33,480 (all joining in) 363 00:29:33,563 --> 00:29:35,607 (singing in Hebrew) 364 00:29:35,690 --> 00:29:37,692 (all continue singing in Hebrew) 365 00:29:42,781 --> 00:29:45,784 ♪ ♪ 366 00:29:48,036 --> 00:29:50,497 (laughs, continues singing) 367 00:29:50,580 --> 00:29:54,167 (all singing in Hebrew) 368 00:29:54,250 --> 00:29:58,004 ♪ ♪ 369 00:30:01,758 --> 00:30:04,761 ♪ ♪ 370 00:30:13,102 --> 00:30:17,857 (all continue singing in Hebrew) 371 00:30:27,075 --> 00:30:29,077 (song ends) 372 00:30:29,160 --> 00:30:30,954 (recites passage in Hebrew) 373 00:30:31,037 --> 00:30:33,998 (others respond in Hebrew) 374 00:30:34,082 --> 00:30:37,210 (Ezra reciting passage in Hebrew) 375 00:30:37,293 --> 00:30:41,130 ♪ ♪ 376 00:30:41,214 --> 00:30:45,718 Stop! Stop! Stop! Don't! 377 00:30:45,802 --> 00:30:48,471 Don't, Sam! 378 00:30:48,555 --> 00:30:51,391 Stop! Stop! Stop! 379 00:30:51,474 --> 00:30:55,353 No! No... 380 00:30:55,436 --> 00:30:58,523 (crying): No, no, no... 381 00:31:01,317 --> 00:31:03,862 Oh, Sam. 382 00:31:04,863 --> 00:31:06,656 (breathing heavily) 383 00:31:12,328 --> 00:31:14,747 ♪ ♪ 384 00:31:23,548 --> 00:31:25,383 (panting) 385 00:31:46,654 --> 00:31:49,073 (lock clicking) 386 00:32:12,805 --> 00:32:14,098 (door opens) 387 00:32:18,144 --> 00:32:20,104 (whimpering) 388 00:32:34,369 --> 00:32:37,080 ♪ ♪ 389 00:33:03,147 --> 00:33:05,149 ♪ ♪ 390 00:33:31,801 --> 00:33:33,803 ♪ ♪ 391 00:33:57,118 --> 00:33:59,120 ♪ ♪ 392 00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:29,442 ♪ ♪ 393 00:34:38,910 --> 00:34:40,495 (door creaks) 394 00:34:46,167 --> 00:34:49,253 (keys jingling) 395 00:34:51,506 --> 00:34:52,715 (door creaks) 396 00:35:33,089 --> 00:35:36,008 SAM: "Dear children of Dr. Strauss, 397 00:35:36,092 --> 00:35:38,261 "I am writing to let you know the bad news 398 00:35:38,344 --> 00:35:40,638 "that your dad is dead. 399 00:35:40,721 --> 00:35:43,307 "He helped me a lot. 400 00:35:43,391 --> 00:35:46,978 "I know from him it's important for you Jews to have a body 401 00:35:47,061 --> 00:35:50,773 "when someone dies, so I put it where you can find it. 402 00:35:50,857 --> 00:35:54,318 "It's ten yards back in the trees 403 00:35:54,402 --> 00:35:58,364 "by the northwest entrance to Finch Ridge Preserve. 404 00:35:58,447 --> 00:36:02,076 I am enclosing a letter he left for you." 405 00:36:04,328 --> 00:36:07,081 ALAN: "Dear Shoshana and Ezra, 406 00:36:07,165 --> 00:36:10,001 "I love you both so much. 407 00:36:12,003 --> 00:36:15,631 "I'm sorry this happened to you, and I'm sorry it happened to me. 408 00:36:15,715 --> 00:36:19,218 "But here we are. 409 00:36:19,302 --> 00:36:22,680 "I want you to know I haven't suffered. 410 00:36:22,763 --> 00:36:25,892 "And I've had a lot of time to think. 411 00:36:25,975 --> 00:36:29,228 -"You know I like to do that. -(crying) 412 00:36:29,312 --> 00:36:33,482 "The two of you gave my life, and your mother's life, meaning. 413 00:36:33,566 --> 00:36:35,610 "All parents love their children, 414 00:36:35,693 --> 00:36:38,821 "but no one loved their kids more than we did. 415 00:36:38,905 --> 00:36:43,534 "You are extraordinary people. 416 00:36:43,618 --> 00:36:46,370 "I want you both to go forward without my death 417 00:36:46,454 --> 00:36:49,207 "defining your lives. 418 00:36:49,290 --> 00:36:53,294 "I also want to make sure that some of the conflicts we had 419 00:36:53,377 --> 00:36:57,340 "don't define how you remember our relationships either. 420 00:36:59,342 --> 00:37:03,596 "Shoshana, you and I and your mother had our issues, 421 00:37:03,679 --> 00:37:09,018 "but mostly it has been easy and full of caring. 422 00:37:09,101 --> 00:37:12,730 -"I thank you for that gift. -(sobbing) 423 00:37:12,813 --> 00:37:16,692 "You are the brightest, most extraordinary young woman 424 00:37:16,776 --> 00:37:18,903 "I can imagine. 425 00:37:18,986 --> 00:37:22,823 "In these dark times, I have thought about you 426 00:37:22,907 --> 00:37:25,326 "and your beautiful family constantly, 427 00:37:25,409 --> 00:37:31,123 "and it has given me joy, pride and solace. 428 00:37:33,334 --> 00:37:35,711 "Ezra, my dear son, 429 00:37:35,795 --> 00:37:39,924 "you are a bright light in this world. 430 00:37:40,007 --> 00:37:44,512 "We both know it hasn't been such smooth sailing between us. 431 00:37:44,595 --> 00:37:46,931 "And your mother. 432 00:37:47,014 --> 00:37:49,183 "I have spent a lot of time thinking back on everything 433 00:37:49,267 --> 00:37:52,979 "that happened, and I see things now 434 00:37:53,062 --> 00:37:56,941 "that I was unable to grasp when they were happening. 435 00:37:57,024 --> 00:38:00,695 "I want you to know that I understand now 436 00:38:00,778 --> 00:38:03,531 "everything you said to me. 437 00:38:03,614 --> 00:38:06,325 "You were right. Mostly. 438 00:38:06,409 --> 00:38:11,539 "I was judgmental, I didn't accept you for who you were, 439 00:38:11,622 --> 00:38:14,583 "and worst of all, I allowed your mother 440 00:38:14,667 --> 00:38:16,210 "to take the blame for this, 441 00:38:16,294 --> 00:38:20,631 "when I was as much at fault as anyone. 442 00:38:20,715 --> 00:38:22,383 "More. 443 00:38:24,343 --> 00:38:29,724 "I want you to know that I see this and I'm sorry. 444 00:38:31,517 --> 00:38:33,769 "Through it all, I always loved you. 445 00:38:33,853 --> 00:38:36,564 "And I want you to know how very much 446 00:38:36,647 --> 00:38:40,818 "I respect who you are and the choices you've made. 447 00:38:40,901 --> 00:38:45,656 "You've built a beautiful family and a beautiful life. 448 00:38:45,740 --> 00:38:50,745 You are a special and truly wonderful person." 449 00:38:50,828 --> 00:38:52,997 (sniffles) 450 00:38:56,375 --> 00:38:59,211 (sighs) 451 00:38:59,295 --> 00:39:01,672 A little meshuggener, maybe. 452 00:39:01,756 --> 00:39:03,591 (laughs softly) 453 00:39:17,980 --> 00:39:20,441 ♪ ♪ 454 00:39:25,321 --> 00:39:26,822 (gate creaks) 455 00:39:50,012 --> 00:39:52,640 SAM: I think I really changed. 456 00:39:52,723 --> 00:39:54,892 The therapy worked. 457 00:39:55,935 --> 00:39:57,853 I'm not going to do it again. 458 00:40:00,147 --> 00:40:04,235 I am never going to hurt anyone again. 459 00:40:07,363 --> 00:40:09,740 That's not true. 460 00:40:09,824 --> 00:40:12,701 You're going to do it again. 461 00:40:12,785 --> 00:40:15,246 We both know it. 462 00:40:21,669 --> 00:40:23,671 ♪ ♪ 463 00:40:39,937 --> 00:40:43,190 Mom! Can you come down here?! 464 00:41:07,381 --> 00:41:09,341 (door opens) 465 00:41:36,702 --> 00:41:38,704 ♪ ♪ 466 00:42:02,853 --> 00:42:05,689 ♪ ♪ 467 00:42:23,874 --> 00:42:25,876 ♪ ♪ 468 00:42:32,550 --> 00:42:33,842 Did you know him? 469 00:42:33,926 --> 00:42:36,053 Not personally. 470 00:42:36,136 --> 00:42:38,681 I have colleagues who were students of his. 471 00:42:38,764 --> 00:42:40,808 And I read his book. 472 00:42:40,891 --> 00:42:43,227 You know, I never read it. 473 00:42:44,687 --> 00:42:47,773 I don't even have a copy. 474 00:42:47,856 --> 00:42:50,442 Although, I think I'm about to inherit 475 00:42:50,526 --> 00:42:52,820 like three boxes of them. 476 00:42:52,903 --> 00:42:56,949 I think one of the sections is on parenting. 477 00:42:57,032 --> 00:42:59,034 Huh. 478 00:42:59,118 --> 00:43:01,287 I guess I should read it. 479 00:43:04,790 --> 00:43:06,875 So, how are you getting along? 480 00:43:10,421 --> 00:43:13,132 What happened was... 481 00:43:20,889 --> 00:43:24,184 I'm just worried for my kids. 482 00:43:24,268 --> 00:43:27,354 And my wife. 483 00:43:27,438 --> 00:43:29,523 And my sister. 484 00:43:32,860 --> 00:43:34,570 What about you? 485 00:43:36,739 --> 00:43:39,950 It's been hard, but I'm okay. 486 00:43:45,748 --> 00:43:49,084 Do you want to tell me a little more about yourself, Ezra? 487 00:43:50,836 --> 00:43:55,299 I'm... I'm not sure where to start. 488 00:43:55,382 --> 00:43:58,010 Really anywhere's okay. 489 00:44:11,899 --> 00:44:13,901 ♪ ♪ 490 00:44:16,195 --> 00:44:18,197 I... 491 00:44:19,990 --> 00:44:22,993 ("You Want It Darker" by Leonard Cohen plays) 492 00:44:35,381 --> 00:44:39,927 ♪ If you are the dealer, I'm out of the game ♪ 493 00:44:40,010 --> 00:44:44,431 ♪ If you are the healer, it means I'm broker than lame ♪ 494 00:44:44,515 --> 00:44:49,269 ♪ If thine is the glory, then mine must be the shame ♪ 495 00:44:49,353 --> 00:44:52,022 ♪ You want it darker ♪ 496 00:44:52,106 --> 00:44:54,817 ♪ We kill the flame ♪ 497 00:45:01,657 --> 00:45:04,451 ♪ Magnified, sanctified ♪ 498 00:45:04,535 --> 00:45:06,453 ♪ Be the holy name ♪ 499 00:45:06,537 --> 00:45:08,872 ♪ Vilified, crucified ♪ 500 00:45:08,956 --> 00:45:11,250 ♪ In the human frame ♪ 501 00:45:11,333 --> 00:45:12,835 ♪ A million candles burning ♪ 502 00:45:12,918 --> 00:45:15,504 ♪ For the help that never came ♪ 503 00:45:15,587 --> 00:45:17,965 ♪ You want it darker ♪ 504 00:45:23,679 --> 00:45:26,974 ♪ Hineni, hineni ♪ 505 00:45:27,057 --> 00:45:28,767 ♪ I'm ready, my Lord ♪ 506 00:45:37,651 --> 00:45:40,946 (vocalizing) 507 00:45:41,029 --> 00:45:43,031 ♪ ♪