1 00:00:31,720 --> 00:00:33,419 - Oh, you two look so cute. 2 00:00:33,553 --> 00:00:35,920 What's your name? 3 00:00:37,053 --> 00:00:38,386 Why would she do that? 4 00:00:38,519 --> 00:00:40,451 - Melanie, it's Vivek. 5 00:00:40,585 --> 00:00:42,518 You came to talk to my class, Corp Finance. 6 00:00:42,652 --> 00:00:45,185 - Right, Northwestern. How are you? 7 00:00:45,317 --> 00:00:48,084 - Your whole talk about rising the ranks at Myrtle & Smith, 8 00:00:48,218 --> 00:00:49,417 it really stuck with me. 9 00:00:49,551 --> 00:00:50,851 - I'm so happy to hear that. 10 00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:53,750 - Listen, you caught vibes that day. 11 00:00:53,883 --> 00:00:55,250 I did, too. 12 00:00:55,383 --> 00:00:57,749 I got the keys to my parents' car. 13 00:00:57,882 --> 00:00:59,949 - Excuse me? 14 00:01:00,082 --> 00:01:04,381 - I eat it all. 15 00:01:04,514 --> 00:01:06,115 - What's goin' on, Mel? 16 00:01:06,248 --> 00:01:07,748 Is he lost? 17 00:01:07,881 --> 00:01:09,814 - Plenty of room for three in the Highlander. 18 00:01:09,947 --> 00:01:11,713 Seats fold down. 19 00:01:11,847 --> 00:01:14,281 - Is he? Oh, gross. 20 00:01:14,413 --> 00:01:15,813 I could be your aunt. 21 00:01:15,946 --> 00:01:18,813 Wait, aren't you Bhavani's kid? 22 00:01:18,946 --> 00:01:20,712 - Yeah, so? 23 00:01:20,846 --> 00:01:22,545 - She's my second cousin. 24 00:01:22,678 --> 00:01:25,245 I'm literally your aunt, you sicko. 25 00:01:25,378 --> 00:01:28,211 Touch my feet. 26 00:01:28,377 --> 00:01:29,644 Touch hers, too. 27 00:01:29,777 --> 00:01:31,111 Y'all are just getting younger and pervier. 28 00:01:31,244 --> 00:01:33,509 Scram! 29 00:01:33,643 --> 00:01:35,376 - Thanks for swooping in. - Of course. 30 00:01:35,509 --> 00:01:36,743 Can we leave now? 31 00:01:36,876 --> 00:01:39,109 You know, Indians make me uncomfortable. 32 00:01:39,242 --> 00:01:41,276 - Being Indian, you're gonna have to get over that one day. 33 00:01:41,408 --> 00:01:42,575 - You know what I mean. 34 00:01:42,708 --> 00:01:44,375 We're Indian, but this is like Indian. 35 00:01:44,508 --> 00:01:46,974 I'm not interested in being around gossiping demon aunties 36 00:01:47,108 --> 00:01:49,008 and guessing what uncles ate for dinner. 37 00:01:49,141 --> 00:01:50,275 - It's not that bad. 38 00:01:51,907 --> 00:01:54,373 - Aloo palak. Yeah, that was aloo palak. 39 00:01:54,506 --> 00:01:55,840 - And you know we can't leave. 40 00:01:55,973 --> 00:01:58,206 Rishi's on his way and I haven't seen him- 41 00:01:58,405 --> 00:01:59,939 - In a whole month. I know. 42 00:02:00,072 --> 00:02:02,239 I've been counting down the days till I lose you forever. 43 00:02:02,372 --> 00:02:03,671 - I'm not going off to war. 44 00:02:03,805 --> 00:02:04,938 - But, we finally got a chance to hang out. 45 00:02:05,071 --> 00:02:06,638 After what? Like two years. 46 00:02:06,771 --> 00:02:08,138 Just like the old days. 47 00:02:08,272 --> 00:02:10,137 You should really reconsider the thrupple option. 48 00:02:10,271 --> 00:02:12,870 I'd let Rishi hit it if it meant making us work. 49 00:02:13,004 --> 00:02:15,636 Oh, this is all really happening, huh, Melanie? 50 00:02:15,769 --> 00:02:17,270 - I love him, Surina. 51 00:02:17,402 --> 00:02:20,003 And once we set a date, we'll buy a place together. 52 00:02:20,136 --> 00:02:22,135 And have dinner parties. And buy matching pajamas. 53 00:02:22,269 --> 00:02:24,035 And start our own book club. 54 00:02:24,169 --> 00:02:25,535 It'll all come together. 55 00:02:25,668 --> 00:02:27,134 - I know you're describing what you think are 56 00:02:27,268 --> 00:02:28,834 really nice things, but I'd rather jump off a building. 57 00:02:28,967 --> 00:02:30,767 Oh. 58 00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,901 Ah shit, Ameet's delaying my check. 59 00:02:33,033 --> 00:02:34,566 - Why are you still working for him? 60 00:02:34,699 --> 00:02:36,133 - Oh, I don't work for him. I just do gigs kinda 61 00:02:36,267 --> 00:02:40,032 exclusively for him for an agreed amount of money. 62 00:02:40,932 --> 00:02:43,232 - Oh God, it's Parveen Auntie. 63 00:02:43,365 --> 00:02:45,564 - You think if we just stand still, she won't see us? 64 00:02:45,697 --> 00:02:46,931 - She's not a T-rex. 65 00:02:47,064 --> 00:02:50,364 - Beti, I haven't seen you in ages. 66 00:02:50,464 --> 00:02:51,696 How's school, Surina? 67 00:02:51,830 --> 00:02:54,496 - I graduated eight years ago. 68 00:02:54,630 --> 00:02:56,897 - So, when's the wedding, darling? 69 00:02:57,029 --> 00:02:58,862 - We're still figurin' out a date. 70 00:02:58,996 --> 00:03:01,996 - Really? It's been what? Four years? 71 00:03:02,129 --> 00:03:05,162 - One year. We're just taking our time. 72 00:03:05,361 --> 00:03:07,461 - Well, good for you. 73 00:03:07,594 --> 00:03:09,727 All these women out there, getting married, 74 00:03:09,860 --> 00:03:12,360 having kids, moving on in the world. 75 00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:14,927 You have every right to do what you want and be stuck. 76 00:03:15,059 --> 00:03:16,759 - I didn't say I was stuck. 77 00:03:16,893 --> 00:03:19,993 - You know what I mean. Not excelling or whatnot. 78 00:03:20,126 --> 00:03:22,358 Anyway, so good to see you two. 79 00:03:22,491 --> 00:03:25,058 Good luck on the exams. 80 00:03:25,192 --> 00:03:28,357 - I want to hate her so bad, but goddammit, she thinks I look 22. 81 00:03:28,457 --> 00:03:29,724 It's so conflicting. 82 00:03:29,857 --> 00:03:31,457 - Ah, there's my cuntús. 83 00:03:31,590 --> 00:03:33,023 - Hey Sheila. - Hey Sheila. 84 00:03:33,157 --> 00:03:35,489 - Sorry I'm late, I had to take Shawn Mendes for a walk. 85 00:03:35,623 --> 00:03:36,956 - Oh, that's a cute name for a dog. 86 00:03:37,090 --> 00:03:38,389 - Dog? 87 00:03:38,523 --> 00:03:39,889 You know, I've never been to one of these before. 88 00:03:40,022 --> 00:03:42,789 It's so cute. It's like a little refugee camp. 89 00:03:42,922 --> 00:03:45,387 - It's the first day of Diwali. 90 00:03:45,521 --> 00:03:46,954 The festival of lights. 91 00:03:47,088 --> 00:03:48,587 It's where you buy something precious 92 00:03:48,721 --> 00:03:50,953 as a token to the goddess Lakshmi. 93 00:03:51,087 --> 00:03:54,520 - Honey, you had me at buy something. 94 00:03:56,353 --> 00:03:57,752 - Did you tell her we were coming here? 95 00:03:57,886 --> 00:04:00,052 - Look, I know she's a little off. 96 00:04:00,186 --> 00:04:01,352 - A little off? 97 00:04:01,452 --> 00:04:02,585 Do you remember her birthday party? 98 00:04:02,719 --> 00:04:04,351 - Yeah, it was a karaoke party. 99 00:04:04,451 --> 00:04:05,451 Amazing hot wings. 100 00:04:05,584 --> 00:04:06,951 - It was a karaoke sex party. 101 00:04:07,085 --> 00:04:09,017 - Yeah, I guess it got a little out of hand 102 00:04:09,151 --> 00:04:10,950 when she brought out the kiddie pool full of ball gags. 103 00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:13,184 But come on. She seems super lonely. 104 00:04:13,350 --> 00:04:16,582 I mean, she has no one except Shawn Mendes. 105 00:04:16,716 --> 00:04:19,183 - Is this a night light? How fun. 106 00:04:19,349 --> 00:04:20,649 I'll catch you in a bit. 107 00:04:20,783 --> 00:04:22,348 Do you take Bitcoin? 108 00:04:22,414 --> 00:04:24,615 - Oh God, if it isn't the two Indian girls 109 00:04:24,748 --> 00:04:26,082 with the white names. 110 00:04:26,215 --> 00:04:27,914 - Literally, the first thing people think about 111 00:04:28,047 --> 00:04:31,413 when they hear Surina is a famous Black tennis player. 112 00:04:31,547 --> 00:04:33,746 So, checkmate, Kavita. 113 00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:35,579 Oh, I see your minions are multiplying. 114 00:04:35,713 --> 00:04:38,346 - Funny. I'm their dance teacher. 115 00:04:38,412 --> 00:04:40,712 Oh, I hope you're not shopping for your wedding, Mel. 116 00:04:40,845 --> 00:04:42,845 These places don't take returns. 117 00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:49,444 - Everyone knows Desis don't do long engagements, 118 00:04:49,577 --> 00:04:51,343 so, something must be going on. 119 00:04:51,476 --> 00:04:52,510 - Nothing's going on. 120 00:04:52,643 --> 00:04:54,110 We're just taking our time. 121 00:04:54,244 --> 00:04:55,877 - Don't you have something better to do like spend your 122 00:04:56,010 --> 00:04:57,909 dad's hotel empire money? 123 00:04:58,042 --> 00:05:00,742 - Okay, first off, they aren't hotels. 124 00:05:00,876 --> 00:05:03,741 They're a boutique bungalow experience. 125 00:05:03,875 --> 00:05:05,708 And second, I earn my own money. 126 00:05:05,841 --> 00:05:07,341 I'm the company's brand ambassador. 127 00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:08,674 - You run the TikTok page. 128 00:05:08,808 --> 00:05:10,640 - Four million followers and counting. 129 00:05:10,774 --> 00:05:12,040 And please tell me. 130 00:05:12,174 --> 00:05:13,874 What do you do besides being dead weight? 131 00:05:14,007 --> 00:05:16,539 - Oh, you mean other than railing your brother? 132 00:05:16,672 --> 00:05:17,739 - You stay away from Rahul. 133 00:05:17,873 --> 00:05:19,773 - Okay. Okay, come on, guys. 134 00:05:19,906 --> 00:05:21,205 - Word to the wise, Mel. 135 00:05:21,338 --> 00:05:22,705 Choose quality friends 136 00:05:22,838 --> 00:05:25,805 or they'll drag you into the gutter with them. 137 00:05:30,171 --> 00:05:32,604 - I'm sorry I took your brother's virginity. 138 00:05:32,737 --> 00:05:34,603 - God, she's so mean. 139 00:05:34,736 --> 00:05:36,103 She didn't used to be like this. 140 00:05:36,237 --> 00:05:38,170 - Yeah, being in the Desi dance competition scene 141 00:05:38,336 --> 00:05:39,602 can ruin you. 142 00:05:39,735 --> 00:05:42,335 Remember when we almost joined that bhangra cult? 143 00:05:42,435 --> 00:05:45,235 - Rishi! 144 00:05:46,235 --> 00:05:47,701 - Oh, I'm gonna give you guys some time. 145 00:05:47,834 --> 00:05:48,968 I guess you should catch up 146 00:05:49,101 --> 00:05:51,399 on 401k plans and container options. 147 00:05:51,533 --> 00:05:53,533 - Sorry I'm late, I came straight from the airport. 148 00:05:53,666 --> 00:05:56,866 - It's okay. I missed you so much. 149 00:05:56,999 --> 00:05:58,532 - Hey, listen, can we have a second to talk? 150 00:05:58,665 --> 00:06:00,332 - Yeah, sure. 151 00:06:00,432 --> 00:06:02,665 But let's grab seats first. The dances are starting. 152 00:06:02,798 --> 00:06:04,998 - Oh, yeah, sure. 153 00:06:29,594 --> 00:06:31,894 - Keep the fuck up, Preeti. 154 00:06:51,690 --> 00:06:53,224 - Yo, yo, yo. 155 00:06:53,356 --> 00:06:54,957 I know you didn't get enough last month during Navratri, 156 00:06:55,090 --> 00:06:58,822 so, the dance floor is open for some dandiya raas. 157 00:06:58,956 --> 00:07:01,789 - You're so quiet. 158 00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:04,821 - I know. It's just... 159 00:07:05,387 --> 00:07:07,488 - What is it? 160 00:07:07,621 --> 00:07:10,221 - It's just that I... No, hold on. Wait. 161 00:07:10,353 --> 00:07:12,020 - All right, come on up. Don't be shy, don't be shy. 162 00:07:12,154 --> 00:07:14,786 Come bust a move. It's fine. 163 00:07:14,919 --> 00:07:16,519 - Remember our couple's intake? 164 00:07:16,652 --> 00:07:18,352 We have to communicate. 165 00:07:18,486 --> 00:07:19,886 - I know. I'm trying. 166 00:07:20,019 --> 00:07:22,852 It's just that this isn't the most ideal setting. 167 00:07:22,985 --> 00:07:24,785 - Radical honesty, Rishi. 168 00:07:24,918 --> 00:07:27,051 - What does that even mean? 169 00:07:27,184 --> 00:07:28,851 - It's the radical honesty sign. 170 00:07:28,984 --> 00:07:31,617 - Well, it's honestly stupid. 171 00:07:31,751 --> 00:07:33,716 - We agreed to do this, Rishi. 172 00:07:33,850 --> 00:07:35,449 It was part of the plan. 173 00:07:35,583 --> 00:07:37,316 - That's just it. 174 00:07:37,449 --> 00:07:39,915 It's, it's your plan. 175 00:07:40,049 --> 00:07:45,014 It's always your plan. I-I-I can't do this anymore. 176 00:07:45,148 --> 00:07:47,614 You want radical honesty, Mel? 177 00:07:47,748 --> 00:07:48,781 Here it is. 178 00:07:48,914 --> 00:07:50,048 I've been sleeping with Brandi. 179 00:07:50,181 --> 00:07:53,680 - Oh, that's messed up. 180 00:07:53,813 --> 00:07:56,480 - Your old project manager? 181 00:07:58,979 --> 00:08:01,612 - I didn't go on a business trip. 182 00:08:01,746 --> 00:08:05,112 I went to Bali with her. 183 00:08:05,311 --> 00:08:07,778 It was the best month of my life. 184 00:08:07,911 --> 00:08:09,477 I'm flying out to LA to be with her. 185 00:08:09,610 --> 00:08:11,477 - Are you okay, Mel? I know this stick isn't sharp, 186 00:08:11,610 --> 00:08:15,342 but I think I can stab him in that soft spot behind his knee. 187 00:08:15,476 --> 00:08:18,110 - I'm sorry. 188 00:08:18,310 --> 00:08:21,176 - We were supposed to be happy together! 189 00:08:22,375 --> 00:08:23,676 - Yo, yo, yo, hey. Security to the stage, 190 00:08:23,809 --> 00:08:24,976 security to the- 191 00:08:25,110 --> 00:08:26,309 - I hate you! You cheated on me! 192 00:08:26,375 --> 00:08:27,641 Fuck you! 193 00:08:27,775 --> 00:08:29,142 - Yo, we don't have security. - Go to hell! 194 00:08:29,308 --> 00:08:31,308 - So, everybody just protect yourselves. 195 00:08:31,408 --> 00:08:33,474 - Stop! Stop! - Lying piece of shit. 196 00:08:33,607 --> 00:08:34,907 I hate you! 197 00:08:35,041 --> 00:08:37,041 - For the love of God. - Hey, hey, yo, yo. 198 00:08:37,174 --> 00:08:39,439 - I hate you, you--aah! - Stay. 199 00:09:18,034 --> 00:09:20,067 Thank you, Mr. Henderson. 200 00:09:20,201 --> 00:09:23,332 I will for sure follow-up with you. 201 00:09:28,598 --> 00:09:31,932 Happy birthday. 202 00:09:32,065 --> 00:09:33,497 - Are you sure you don't need anything? 203 00:09:33,630 --> 00:09:37,630 I can order you lunch or torch his clothes. 204 00:09:37,764 --> 00:09:39,296 - Thanks, but I'll pass. 205 00:09:39,429 --> 00:09:41,197 - You never let me torch anything. 206 00:09:41,329 --> 00:09:43,696 - I can't believe he did this. 207 00:09:43,830 --> 00:09:45,762 And I assaulted him. 208 00:09:45,895 --> 00:09:47,428 - That was the best part of the night. 209 00:09:47,562 --> 00:09:48,995 That's the Mel I love. 210 00:09:49,129 --> 00:09:51,095 Like that time when you got dumped by that guy, 211 00:09:51,294 --> 00:09:54,095 so you dated his landlord and increased his rent. 212 00:09:54,294 --> 00:09:56,461 - This wasn't supposed to happen. 213 00:09:56,593 --> 00:09:58,827 - We'll figure this out together, okay? 214 00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:00,226 I gotta head to Ameet's. 215 00:10:00,359 --> 00:10:03,792 Oh, by the way, don't Google "stick girl". 216 00:10:03,926 --> 00:10:06,459 - Wait, what? - Okay, byeeee! 217 00:10:10,458 --> 00:10:12,391 - We were supposed to be happy together. 218 00:10:12,524 --> 00:10:14,757 - Stop, stop, stop. 219 00:10:14,890 --> 00:10:16,191 - You fucking lying piece of shit! 220 00:10:16,356 --> 00:10:18,690 I hate you! You freaking idiot! 221 00:10:18,824 --> 00:10:21,255 I hate you! You cheated on me! 222 00:10:21,389 --> 00:10:22,656 - I can explain. 223 00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:26,855 - I know as a woman of color 224 00:10:26,988 --> 00:10:29,221 that you aren't often seen 225 00:10:29,354 --> 00:10:32,787 in the same way that I, a cisgendered, 226 00:10:32,921 --> 00:10:36,687 heterosexual male, man. Not mailman. 227 00:10:36,821 --> 00:10:38,353 Man, A-N. 228 00:10:38,487 --> 00:10:42,153 And I know sometimes things can get taken out of context. 229 00:10:42,286 --> 00:10:45,885 - I will murder you. Murder! 230 00:10:46,019 --> 00:10:48,218 - I'm sorry. It wasn't my best moment. 231 00:10:48,351 --> 00:10:50,918 - Every moment is your moment. 232 00:10:51,051 --> 00:10:56,451 Womoment. As an ally, I see you. 233 00:10:56,583 --> 00:10:58,150 Inclusively. 234 00:10:58,349 --> 00:11:00,883 - I think you might just be saying a lot of different words. 235 00:11:01,017 --> 00:11:03,049 - Very important words. 236 00:11:03,183 --> 00:11:04,549 I'll cut to it. 237 00:11:04,682 --> 00:11:06,649 One of our biggest clients is coming in Monday. 238 00:11:06,782 --> 00:11:09,681 And if they saw this wrong representation, 239 00:11:09,815 --> 00:11:11,514 they just wouldn't get it. 240 00:11:11,648 --> 00:11:15,847 White people, am I right? Burn it down. 241 00:11:15,980 --> 00:11:20,512 Just burn it down. 242 00:11:21,412 --> 00:11:24,646 I think you should take some time to heal. 243 00:11:24,779 --> 00:11:27,278 I'll float the project to Jake. 244 00:11:27,344 --> 00:11:29,112 - So, you're taking me off a project 245 00:11:29,278 --> 00:11:31,645 and basically suspending me for a week? 246 00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:35,510 - Think of it as an early secular Christmas gift 247 00:11:35,644 --> 00:11:38,943 without pay. Cool? 248 00:11:39,077 --> 00:11:40,743 - I guess so. - Great. 249 00:11:40,876 --> 00:11:45,009 I'm really glad we were able to hold space for that. 250 00:11:45,142 --> 00:11:47,642 And that's it. 251 00:11:50,408 --> 00:11:52,574 If you could just close the door on your way out? 252 00:11:52,708 --> 00:11:53,908 Thanks. 253 00:11:54,041 --> 00:11:56,640 Hey, solidarity. 254 00:12:05,472 --> 00:12:09,838 - Surina, I hired you to make a website 255 00:12:09,971 --> 00:12:11,604 and run the social media pages. 256 00:12:11,738 --> 00:12:13,371 As an entrepreneur- - You deliver food 257 00:12:13,504 --> 00:12:15,037 for your parents' restaurant 258 00:12:15,171 --> 00:12:16,904 and sell stolen iPhones to middle schoolers. 259 00:12:17,037 --> 00:12:18,637 - You botched my Diwali campaign. 260 00:12:18,770 --> 00:12:20,303 - I didn't botch anything. The Instagram impressions were 261 00:12:20,436 --> 00:12:22,502 amazing considering how awful the idea was. 262 00:12:22,636 --> 00:12:24,602 - David Diwali could've captured the hearts and minds 263 00:12:24,736 --> 00:12:28,435 of this nation if you did your job right. 264 00:12:28,568 --> 00:12:30,468 I mean, look at him. He could've been the next 265 00:12:30,601 --> 00:12:33,134 Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, SpongeBob even. 266 00:12:33,267 --> 00:12:35,034 - David Diwali looks like he abducts children. 267 00:12:35,168 --> 00:12:36,634 - How dare you. 268 00:12:36,767 --> 00:12:40,100 Look, you didn't fulfill your end of the agreement, 269 00:12:40,266 --> 00:12:41,800 so, I'm putting you on a tab. 270 00:12:41,933 --> 00:12:44,000 You'll get your paycheck once you work off what you owe me. 271 00:12:44,133 --> 00:12:45,331 - What? Screw that. 272 00:12:45,465 --> 00:12:47,166 - No screwing, just realness. 273 00:12:47,298 --> 00:12:48,498 - You're actually being serious? 274 00:12:48,632 --> 00:12:50,032 - Yeah. 275 00:12:50,166 --> 00:12:51,698 Welcome to the school of hard knocks, Surina. 276 00:12:51,831 --> 00:12:53,898 Dog eat dog. No pain, no gain. 277 00:12:54,031 --> 00:12:55,165 Life takes no prisoners. 278 00:13:02,662 --> 00:13:05,295 - Take this as a lesson in responsibility. 279 00:13:05,429 --> 00:13:08,795 Maybe it'll help you get your shit together. 280 00:13:08,928 --> 00:13:11,628 - You're lucky your parents make good food. 281 00:13:18,393 --> 00:13:20,826 - Clay Oven Restaurant. This is Ameet. 282 00:13:20,959 --> 00:13:22,292 Oh, hi Auntie. 283 00:13:22,426 --> 00:13:25,160 Yes, I'm doing good. 284 00:13:25,292 --> 00:13:28,291 No, no, I'm, I'm still single. 285 00:13:40,123 --> 00:13:41,690 - I hate always waiting in line here. 286 00:13:41,823 --> 00:13:43,990 - Gilpreet's chai is like crack. Just be cool. 287 00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:47,022 - If he says something, I swear I'm going to boycott this place. 288 00:13:47,156 --> 00:13:49,255 - Hi, Uncle Ji. Happy Diwali. 289 00:13:49,355 --> 00:13:51,954 I hope you're having a wonderful, blessed day. 290 00:13:52,088 --> 00:13:53,320 We'll have two chais, please. 291 00:13:53,454 --> 00:13:55,088 - We'll have two chais, please. 292 00:13:55,254 --> 00:13:57,420 Speak in Punjabi. - We don't speak Punjabi. 293 00:13:57,553 --> 00:13:59,253 - Speak Hindi then. Something. 294 00:13:59,353 --> 00:14:00,620 Respect the homeland. 295 00:14:00,753 --> 00:14:02,054 - Trust me, us not speaking the language 296 00:14:02,253 --> 00:14:03,886 is respecting the homeland. 297 00:14:04,019 --> 00:14:05,819 - I survived partition for this? 298 00:14:05,952 --> 00:14:09,418 Wannabee Lindsay Lohan and Kendall Jenner? 299 00:14:09,551 --> 00:14:10,418 - Didn't realize I ordered chai 300 00:14:10,551 --> 00:14:12,418 with a side of misogyny today. 301 00:14:14,517 --> 00:14:16,250 - Next. 302 00:14:16,316 --> 00:14:18,450 - Next time, we boycott this place. 303 00:14:18,583 --> 00:14:20,315 There is nothing better than a hot-ass chai 304 00:14:20,449 --> 00:14:24,616 after a long-ass day. 305 00:14:24,749 --> 00:14:27,281 - Don't hate me, but I reached out to Rishi. 306 00:14:27,415 --> 00:14:28,882 We're gonna meet up before his flight tomorrow. 307 00:14:29,015 --> 00:14:30,082 - What? No! 308 00:14:30,248 --> 00:14:32,049 - We have to talk this through. 309 00:14:32,248 --> 00:14:33,280 - Don't do this, Mel. 310 00:14:33,414 --> 00:14:35,081 This is a gift from the heavens. 311 00:14:35,247 --> 00:14:36,881 Just move on like it never happened. 312 00:14:37,014 --> 00:14:38,114 - But we worked. 313 00:14:38,247 --> 00:14:39,780 We have the same interests and goals. 314 00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:42,613 I mean, we both love fondue, and we get really creative with it. 315 00:14:42,746 --> 00:14:44,378 Like last time we got persimmons- 316 00:14:44,512 --> 00:14:46,245 - Again, I know these are being described as nice things, 317 00:14:46,378 --> 00:14:47,745 but I will jump off a building. 318 00:14:47,879 --> 00:14:50,511 And more importantly, he cheated on you. 319 00:14:50,644 --> 00:14:52,244 - I obviously respect myself enough 320 00:14:52,310 --> 00:14:56,045 to not go crawling back to him, but I just, 321 00:14:56,244 --> 00:14:58,510 I need to understand what happened. 322 00:14:58,643 --> 00:15:01,110 We can't just erase everything we had. 323 00:15:01,243 --> 00:15:03,043 - Since you're part of the hive. 324 00:15:05,308 --> 00:15:10,241 - Here you go. Hey, say no to drugs. 325 00:15:10,341 --> 00:15:12,241 Super fan. 326 00:15:12,341 --> 00:15:14,340 - Yeah, Sanjay, most adult men don't gloat about 327 00:15:14,473 --> 00:15:16,273 taking pictures with young boys. 328 00:15:16,407 --> 00:15:17,874 - What can I say? 329 00:15:18,007 --> 00:15:19,774 You win one spelling bee and you're a hero for life. 330 00:15:19,907 --> 00:15:22,839 I'm like their Lebron James. 331 00:15:22,973 --> 00:15:24,406 Nothing but vowels. 332 00:15:24,539 --> 00:15:26,538 - You just wake up in the morning with no clue, huh? 333 00:15:26,672 --> 00:15:27,972 - Whatever. 334 00:15:28,105 --> 00:15:30,872 Um, have you all seen this? 335 00:15:31,005 --> 00:15:32,570 - ♪ Beat that boy with a stick, boy ♪ 336 00:15:32,704 --> 00:15:34,470 ♪ Light him up like a Bic, boy ♪ 337 00:15:34,604 --> 00:15:36,337 ♪ Dang that fool was a cheat, boy ♪ 338 00:15:36,470 --> 00:15:38,269 ♪ Now he gonna get de-stroyed ♪ 339 00:15:38,403 --> 00:15:39,903 ♪ She's a stick girl in a stick world ♪ 340 00:15:40,037 --> 00:15:41,803 ♪ She's a stick girl in a stick world ♪ 341 00:15:41,936 --> 00:15:43,236 - That's actually pretty catchy. 342 00:15:43,369 --> 00:15:44,769 I mean, I wouldn't make it my ringtone or anything. 343 00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:46,602 But definitely a top contender for the workout playlist. 344 00:15:46,735 --> 00:15:47,802 - Surina. - Sorry. 345 00:15:47,935 --> 00:15:49,468 That was an abomination. 346 00:15:49,602 --> 00:15:51,467 - You know, I heard what Rishi did 347 00:15:51,601 --> 00:15:53,901 and maybe this is for the best. 348 00:15:54,035 --> 00:15:58,833 That big fall from grace, so you truly appreciate 349 00:15:58,967 --> 00:16:00,366 what's right in front of you 350 00:16:00,500 --> 00:16:03,799 like, literally in front of you. 351 00:16:04,966 --> 00:16:08,898 - At least simp with some dignity, Jesus. 352 00:16:09,032 --> 00:16:10,331 - What am I gonna do, guys? 353 00:16:10,464 --> 00:16:11,765 - I'll tell you what you're certainly not doing 354 00:16:11,898 --> 00:16:14,065 is brooding until you talk with Rishi tomorrow. 355 00:16:14,230 --> 00:16:15,664 This is Diwali. 356 00:16:15,797 --> 00:16:20,562 I propose a full weekend social banger extravaganza. 357 00:16:20,696 --> 00:16:22,229 - That sounds like way too many words. 358 00:16:22,329 --> 00:16:23,596 - They're all equally important. 359 00:16:23,729 --> 00:16:25,229 - No, I'm just gonna stay home 360 00:16:25,295 --> 00:16:26,928 and crawl under my weighted blanket. 361 00:16:27,062 --> 00:16:28,294 - Oh, I totally get it. 362 00:16:28,428 --> 00:16:29,762 It does wonders for the nervous system. 363 00:16:29,895 --> 00:16:31,428 - No one cares, Friendzone Freddy. 364 00:16:31,561 --> 00:16:32,727 Just give me the weekend, Mel. 365 00:16:32,861 --> 00:16:34,394 You gotta release all this energy 366 00:16:34,527 --> 00:16:36,627 and bring back that bad bitch I once knew. 367 00:16:36,761 --> 00:16:40,259 And you can only do that by getting intensely hammered. 368 00:16:43,060 --> 00:16:45,225 Look... - Yeah. 369 00:16:45,358 --> 00:16:47,525 - Whatever happens with Rishi, happens. 370 00:16:47,659 --> 00:16:49,325 But the only way you're gonna find closure in this 371 00:16:49,458 --> 00:16:51,290 is with a big ol' Rishi purge. 372 00:16:51,424 --> 00:16:54,324 You know, wash that mofo out of your soul. 373 00:16:54,457 --> 00:16:56,223 - I just miss him. 374 00:16:56,323 --> 00:16:57,490 - I get that. 375 00:16:57,623 --> 00:17:01,857 But weekend social banger extravaganza. 376 00:17:01,990 --> 00:17:04,722 Weekend social banger extravaganza. 377 00:17:04,856 --> 00:17:06,956 Weekend social banger extravaganza!!! 378 00:17:07,089 --> 00:17:08,254 - Okay. - Yes! 379 00:17:10,855 --> 00:17:12,221 - Oh, it's Sheila. 380 00:17:12,354 --> 00:17:14,253 She's asking if we're going to her thing tonight. 381 00:17:14,387 --> 00:17:15,553 - We're not going. 382 00:17:15,687 --> 00:17:16,987 And more importantly, she's crazy. 383 00:17:17,121 --> 00:17:18,054 - Kismet. Tell her we'll be there. 384 00:17:18,220 --> 00:17:19,520 - Absolutely not. 385 00:17:19,654 --> 00:17:21,020 - Uh-uh, we're jumping out of that comfort zone. 386 00:17:21,219 --> 00:17:23,419 Embrace it, Mel. Two chais to go! 387 00:17:23,552 --> 00:17:26,284 - Get the hell out of my store! - Okay! 388 00:17:30,052 --> 00:17:32,350 - It's like everywhere you go, Christmas, 389 00:17:32,484 --> 00:17:34,317 it's just in your face. 390 00:17:34,450 --> 00:17:36,517 It's like capitalism on steroids. 391 00:17:36,651 --> 00:17:39,050 Is anyone even celebrating Diwali right now? 392 00:17:39,216 --> 00:17:41,349 It's only celebrated by about a billion people. 393 00:17:41,483 --> 00:17:43,516 - Exactly. Yes. 394 00:17:43,650 --> 00:17:46,448 - That's why I appreciate Indian culture so much. 395 00:17:46,582 --> 00:17:50,714 You all just have this natural spiritually, you know? 396 00:17:50,848 --> 00:17:54,247 You're just so connected with the earth. 397 00:17:54,381 --> 00:17:56,947 - And there it is. - There it is. 398 00:17:57,080 --> 00:18:00,080 - Excuse us. 399 00:18:00,213 --> 00:18:02,412 - You heard the lady. Beat it. 400 00:18:02,545 --> 00:18:06,445 - Wait. Scripps National Spelling Bee champ '04? 401 00:18:06,579 --> 00:18:10,211 Oh, you killed "insouciant". Can I get a picture? 402 00:18:10,344 --> 00:18:13,378 - Well, since you're part of the hive. 403 00:18:14,310 --> 00:18:15,543 - Buzz, buzz. - Buzz, buzz. 404 00:18:15,677 --> 00:18:16,910 - Look, this is just a primer. 405 00:18:17,044 --> 00:18:18,410 I promise you things will get better. 406 00:18:18,543 --> 00:18:20,776 Weekend social banger extravaganza. 407 00:18:22,743 --> 00:18:24,643 - Who let the hos out? 408 00:18:24,776 --> 00:18:28,009 Terrible news about Rafiki. - Rishi. 409 00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:31,975 - What did I say? Bit of advice, vaginoplasty. 410 00:18:32,108 --> 00:18:33,540 - What? 411 00:18:33,674 --> 00:18:35,774 - No one wants a loose, sloppy vagina, Melanie. 412 00:18:35,907 --> 00:18:38,239 Flapping around like a lost sailboat at sea. 413 00:18:38,373 --> 00:18:41,040 Ew, mayday. 414 00:18:41,206 --> 00:18:42,840 - Kavita's here? - I know, right? 415 00:18:42,973 --> 00:18:45,238 I hate that bitch, I don't know why she's even here. 416 00:18:45,372 --> 00:18:46,805 I love her, though. 417 00:18:46,939 --> 00:18:48,739 I can't wait to go to her Diwali party tomorrow night. 418 00:18:48,872 --> 00:18:50,006 - Wait, what? 419 00:18:50,204 --> 00:18:51,771 - Diwali is the festival of lights. 420 00:18:51,904 --> 00:18:53,537 It's celebrated over the course of five days, 421 00:18:53,671 --> 00:18:55,471 something about a goddess-- - I know what Diwali is. 422 00:18:55,604 --> 00:18:57,203 I told you what Diwali is. 423 00:18:57,269 --> 00:18:58,603 Kavita's having a party tomorrow? 424 00:18:58,737 --> 00:19:00,336 - Yeah, why else would she invite me? 425 00:19:00,470 --> 00:19:02,502 - Sheila, we didn't get invited. 426 00:19:02,636 --> 00:19:04,369 - Why didn't you just say that? 427 00:19:04,502 --> 00:19:08,201 It's 2021, you gotta use your me too big-girl words, honey. 428 00:19:08,334 --> 00:19:09,801 - Who cares. 429 00:19:09,935 --> 00:19:11,768 She's a total bitch and her party will suck balls. 430 00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:14,034 - I know but the principle. She probably invited Rishi. 431 00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:15,634 - Rafiki. 432 00:19:15,767 --> 00:19:18,467 That is odd that you didn't get an invite, though. 433 00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:19,834 I mean, all the browns are going. 434 00:19:19,967 --> 00:19:22,599 It's gonna be the event of the year. 435 00:19:22,733 --> 00:19:25,733 Oh, for the love of God, Shawn Mendes. 436 00:19:25,866 --> 00:19:29,198 No, that will stain. Use seltzer! 437 00:19:29,264 --> 00:19:31,198 - That's not Shawn Mendes. 438 00:19:31,331 --> 00:19:32,697 - Shawn Mendes, uh, 439 00:19:32,831 --> 00:19:35,197 son of the billionaire Venezuelan oil tycoon? 440 00:19:35,330 --> 00:19:38,030 I think I know who Shawn Mendes is. 441 00:19:42,563 --> 00:19:46,695 Don't forget your gift bags. 442 00:19:46,829 --> 00:19:50,361 - A few shots and we're gone. I promise. 443 00:19:52,728 --> 00:19:55,461 - Thirty-five carats cut to perfection. 444 00:19:55,594 --> 00:19:58,593 Mined in Kolkata. 445 00:19:58,727 --> 00:20:00,126 Do you know it took me almost a decade 446 00:20:00,259 --> 00:20:02,093 to get my hands on this one? 447 00:20:04,359 --> 00:20:06,125 - It's gorgeous. 448 00:20:06,258 --> 00:20:08,591 - It's more than gorgeous. 449 00:20:08,725 --> 00:20:12,591 I'd let it slowly penetrate me to R&B music. 450 00:20:12,725 --> 00:20:14,890 - That feels like a lot. 451 00:20:15,024 --> 00:20:18,457 - So, Montecito's men will be with you shortly. 452 00:20:18,590 --> 00:20:20,456 Be discreet, all right? 453 00:20:20,589 --> 00:20:21,956 Make it a clean transaction. 454 00:20:22,090 --> 00:20:25,489 Bring the suitcase of money to the office, okay? 455 00:20:25,623 --> 00:20:26,855 - I won't let you down, Percy. 456 00:20:26,989 --> 00:20:29,989 - Don't use my name. Or yours, you idiot. 457 00:20:30,121 --> 00:20:33,887 Just talk in codes or something, Jesus. 458 00:20:42,020 --> 00:20:44,785 - My nose is real but tell everyone it's fake. 459 00:20:46,485 --> 00:20:47,919 - There you go. 460 00:20:48,052 --> 00:20:49,118 - Thanks, Kal Penn. 461 00:20:49,251 --> 00:20:51,085 - Oh, just Kal is fine. 462 00:20:51,217 --> 00:20:53,217 You doing okay? You're on your third one. 463 00:20:53,351 --> 00:20:55,651 - It's just been a long week. 464 00:20:55,784 --> 00:20:56,984 I didn't know you bartended. 465 00:20:57,116 --> 00:20:59,249 - Oh, this is just to prep for a role. 466 00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:02,616 You know, I try to embody the characters that I'm playing. 467 00:21:02,749 --> 00:21:04,248 It's a thing that actors do all the time. 468 00:21:04,382 --> 00:21:06,515 So today I am a bartender. 469 00:21:06,649 --> 00:21:08,481 You know Emma Stone was checking IDs last week 470 00:21:08,615 --> 00:21:09,681 to prep for some role she had. 471 00:21:09,815 --> 00:21:11,247 You know Betty White? 472 00:21:11,381 --> 00:21:13,481 Like a month ago, she was siting exactly where you were 473 00:21:13,615 --> 00:21:15,547 just getting completely shit house hammered 474 00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:18,614 on Japanese whiskey and Hot Pockets. 475 00:21:18,747 --> 00:21:20,846 - That's a lot. 476 00:21:20,980 --> 00:21:23,546 Wait, so is that Tituss Burgess prepping? 477 00:21:23,679 --> 00:21:24,913 Let me guess. 478 00:21:25,046 --> 00:21:27,178 He's playing a mysterious loner who was 479 00:21:27,244 --> 00:21:30,079 at the top of his game only to take a turn for the worst. 480 00:21:30,211 --> 00:21:32,644 - No, he's not prepping, Mel. 481 00:21:32,777 --> 00:21:34,577 - What do you want from me? 482 00:21:34,711 --> 00:21:37,177 I can't be fabulous all the time. 483 00:21:37,243 --> 00:21:39,010 It's always like, Tituss, what are you wearing? 484 00:21:39,176 --> 00:21:41,010 Tituss, be the life of the party. 485 00:21:41,176 --> 00:21:42,776 I mean, here I am having a damn Bahama Mama 486 00:21:42,910 --> 00:21:45,342 in these ill-fitted pants and I'm proud of it. 487 00:21:45,475 --> 00:21:48,609 - I'm so sorry. - I'm so sorry. 488 00:21:48,742 --> 00:21:50,441 You don't get to apologize. 489 00:21:50,574 --> 00:21:56,540 You beautiful, beautiful woman person. 490 00:21:57,707 --> 00:22:00,173 Kal, put this on her tab. 491 00:22:00,273 --> 00:22:04,973 And no one, no one should be allowed to have hair that silky! 492 00:22:09,072 --> 00:22:10,404 - Well, it was good to see you, Mel. 493 00:22:10,538 --> 00:22:13,571 I've got to go to a meat plant. 494 00:22:13,705 --> 00:22:17,870 God, it's a complicated role. 495 00:22:19,869 --> 00:22:22,536 - Did the bartender just leave? 496 00:22:22,669 --> 00:22:24,970 - Yeah. Do you want this? 497 00:22:25,169 --> 00:22:26,234 I didn't touch it. 498 00:22:26,368 --> 00:22:30,501 - Yeah, I hate to waste free booze. 499 00:22:32,534 --> 00:22:35,801 - Oh, geez, wow. 500 00:22:35,934 --> 00:22:41,166 - Well, hard times call for hard solutions. 501 00:22:41,266 --> 00:22:43,333 I'm Melanie. 502 00:22:43,466 --> 00:22:45,365 - I'm Drake Doolittle. 503 00:22:45,498 --> 00:22:46,699 - Your name is Drake Doolittle? 504 00:22:46,832 --> 00:22:48,498 - Drake Doolittle, yeah. 505 00:22:48,632 --> 00:22:53,965 It's part French and uh, lower Italian. 506 00:22:56,597 --> 00:22:59,163 Excuse me. Be right back. 507 00:22:59,263 --> 00:23:01,163 - Okay. 508 00:23:01,263 --> 00:23:04,696 - Who is he? Hit it, uh, uh, uh. 509 00:23:04,829 --> 00:23:06,596 - I don't know. I just met him. 510 00:23:06,729 --> 00:23:08,561 I'm not gonna sleep with anyone. 511 00:23:08,695 --> 00:23:10,394 - Here, you can do it behind my coat. 512 00:23:10,528 --> 00:23:12,161 No one will see. 513 00:23:12,261 --> 00:23:13,561 It has pockets. 514 00:23:13,695 --> 00:23:16,627 - Surina, Rishi and I, we're... 515 00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:17,927 We need to figure it out. 516 00:23:18,061 --> 00:23:19,694 - Oh, so as you are figuring it out, 517 00:23:19,826 --> 00:23:21,392 Rishi gets to stick his dick into other girls, 518 00:23:21,526 --> 00:23:24,359 but how come you can't get to stick your dick in... 519 00:23:24,492 --> 00:23:26,158 You know what I mean. 520 00:23:28,959 --> 00:23:31,358 - Yeah, so the deal's gone bad. 521 00:23:31,491 --> 00:23:34,390 They don't know what you look like, so get out of there. 522 00:23:34,524 --> 00:23:35,924 - Wait, it can happen that fast? 523 00:23:36,058 --> 00:23:37,890 - Yeah, I decided that I'd rather keep the diamond. 524 00:23:38,023 --> 00:23:39,723 But hurry, they're basically 525 00:23:39,856 --> 00:23:42,957 looking for any guy by themselves. 526 00:23:43,156 --> 00:23:45,188 - Dammit. 527 00:23:49,721 --> 00:23:52,154 - Hot guy coming. 528 00:23:52,287 --> 00:23:54,521 So, Mel is a huge catch and she's been in this 529 00:23:54,654 --> 00:23:56,753 shitty relationship for like a billion years. 530 00:23:56,887 --> 00:23:59,219 So, she's looking for some no strings attached action. 531 00:23:59,353 --> 00:24:00,987 Also, she's getting her vag tightened. 532 00:24:01,153 --> 00:24:03,152 It won't flap around like a lost sailboat at sea. 533 00:24:03,218 --> 00:24:04,352 - Surina. 534 00:24:04,485 --> 00:24:05,752 - That is a fantastic idea. - What? 535 00:24:05,886 --> 00:24:07,519 - Yeah, let's do it. Off we go. 536 00:24:07,652 --> 00:24:09,217 - You have an accent? That's so hot. 537 00:24:09,351 --> 00:24:11,651 Say crikey, where'd me kangaroo go? 538 00:24:11,785 --> 00:24:14,417 - Yeah, we have gotta go. Come on, off we go. 539 00:24:14,550 --> 00:24:15,750 - Where are we going? 540 00:24:15,884 --> 00:24:17,717 - Oh, don't forget your gift bags. 541 00:24:17,850 --> 00:24:20,182 - Wait, who the hell is that guy? 542 00:24:20,316 --> 00:24:22,016 - Not you. 543 00:24:25,915 --> 00:24:29,148 - What are you doing? - Security check. 544 00:24:34,781 --> 00:24:36,847 You're fine. 545 00:24:37,447 --> 00:24:39,179 - What was that about? 546 00:24:41,846 --> 00:24:43,379 It's cold out here. 547 00:24:43,513 --> 00:24:45,545 Listen, you can't just drag me around like a rag doll. 548 00:24:45,679 --> 00:24:47,211 - Type your number in. - Yes, daddy. 549 00:24:47,345 --> 00:24:48,812 No, wait, I'm in a relationship. 550 00:24:48,946 --> 00:24:50,578 Sort of. It's complicated. 551 00:24:50,711 --> 00:24:53,144 We can't do this. I didn't wax. 552 00:25:01,743 --> 00:25:04,143 - I'm gonna call you very, very soon 553 00:25:04,276 --> 00:25:07,610 because you have something special that I need. 554 00:25:07,742 --> 00:25:11,009 You got it? 555 00:25:13,741 --> 00:25:15,141 - I haven't done this in three years. 556 00:25:15,207 --> 00:25:18,341 Is this flirting? Did you just turn me down? 557 00:25:18,474 --> 00:25:22,240 It's very difficult to make sense out of this situation. 558 00:25:23,273 --> 00:25:25,140 Call me. 559 00:25:32,338 --> 00:25:34,672 - Oh, back already? 560 00:25:34,805 --> 00:25:36,505 The hot ones are always minute men. 561 00:25:36,638 --> 00:25:38,203 All good. We'll find another. 562 00:25:38,337 --> 00:25:40,537 - Do you know what? Let's get drunk. 563 00:25:40,671 --> 00:25:42,537 - Yeah! 564 00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:48,793 - Shit. 565 00:26:55,492 --> 00:26:56,524 Surina, wake up. 566 00:26:56,658 --> 00:26:58,291 - No, Frosty, the buttons. 567 00:26:58,424 --> 00:27:01,257 They're sewing them on to your skin. 568 00:27:01,391 --> 00:27:02,823 Ow, what? 569 00:27:02,957 --> 00:27:05,957 - I'm supposed to meet Rishi. 570 00:27:07,123 --> 00:27:11,556 - Oh, weekend social banger extravaganza! 571 00:27:11,689 --> 00:27:14,755 Let's go, Diwali! 572 00:27:14,888 --> 00:27:17,121 - Anyone want an omelette? Frittata? 573 00:27:25,220 --> 00:27:26,953 Who the hell is that? - Oh, Jerry. 574 00:27:27,119 --> 00:27:31,020 Met him at the bar. 575 00:27:31,152 --> 00:27:33,418 - I hope you guys like scrambled. 576 00:27:33,552 --> 00:27:37,184 - Prince Charles is easier to get ahold of than you two. 577 00:27:37,318 --> 00:27:39,918 So, this is how the 99% lives. 578 00:27:40,117 --> 00:27:42,183 - Sheila, what are you doing here? 579 00:27:42,317 --> 00:27:45,950 - There is a pressing matter that we need to resolve at once. 580 00:27:46,116 --> 00:27:47,583 Kavita didn't get her gift bag. 581 00:27:47,716 --> 00:27:48,883 - We didn't take her gift bag. 582 00:27:49,017 --> 00:27:50,215 Did you take her gift bag? 583 00:27:50,348 --> 00:27:51,315 - Gift bags are for deserving people. 584 00:27:51,448 --> 00:27:52,649 That's all I'm gonna say. 585 00:27:52,782 --> 00:27:54,215 - Okay, great. Check that off the list. 586 00:27:54,348 --> 00:27:56,447 One more thing, all of your lives are in grave danger. 587 00:27:56,581 --> 00:27:57,881 - What? - What? 588 00:27:58,114 --> 00:27:59,514 - My ex, not the last one, but the one before 589 00:27:59,648 --> 00:28:01,114 the one before that. 590 00:28:01,247 --> 00:28:02,813 - Oh, you mean the 96-year-old you married for money? 591 00:28:02,947 --> 00:28:04,313 - I loved Archibald 592 00:28:04,446 --> 00:28:05,947 and those were the best 32 days of my life. 593 00:28:06,113 --> 00:28:07,446 I'm talking about my ex, Percy. 594 00:28:07,579 --> 00:28:09,379 - Is he on his deathbed too? - Do you kiss your mother 595 00:28:09,512 --> 00:28:11,579 with that filthy, sarcastic whore mouth? 596 00:28:11,712 --> 00:28:14,012 Ah, let me just show you. 597 00:28:19,244 --> 00:28:20,377 Him. 598 00:28:20,510 --> 00:28:23,176 He owns a small blood diamond operation. 599 00:28:23,310 --> 00:28:25,110 I let him use my bar as the drop-off spot 600 00:28:25,210 --> 00:28:26,910 and well, the deal went bad. 601 00:28:27,109 --> 00:28:28,676 - Blood diamond operation? 602 00:28:28,809 --> 00:28:29,776 You've got to be kidding me. 603 00:28:29,910 --> 00:28:31,475 - And what does bad mean? 604 00:28:31,608 --> 00:28:33,341 - Wait, that's the guy who was hitting on me. 605 00:28:33,475 --> 00:28:34,475 Drake Doolittle. 606 00:28:34,608 --> 00:28:35,875 - That's seriously his name? 607 00:28:36,009 --> 00:28:37,408 - Yeah, he's part French, part lower Italian. 608 00:28:37,541 --> 00:28:39,741 - Mm, so much better than upper Italian. 609 00:28:39,874 --> 00:28:41,841 Do not let those people in this country. 610 00:28:41,974 --> 00:28:43,340 - He was using me as some sort of decoy? 611 00:28:43,473 --> 00:28:45,606 - Obviously. His name is Daniel 612 00:28:45,740 --> 00:28:48,106 and he put a 35-carat diamond in your gift bag. 613 00:28:48,172 --> 00:28:49,772 And now all your lives are in danger. 614 00:28:49,906 --> 00:28:51,205 - Wait, hold up. 615 00:28:51,338 --> 00:28:53,839 So that catch of a lifetime put a diamond 616 00:28:53,972 --> 00:28:55,305 in Mel's gift bag? 617 00:28:55,437 --> 00:28:57,871 So, a big-ass diamond probably worth millions 618 00:28:58,104 --> 00:28:59,571 is in this apartment right now? 619 00:28:59,704 --> 00:29:01,104 - Twelve million, but yes. 620 00:29:01,204 --> 00:29:03,937 - Holy shit. Let's not give it back. 621 00:29:04,103 --> 00:29:05,904 - A person once put one over on Percy, 622 00:29:06,103 --> 00:29:08,135 and well, he scooped his eyeballs out 623 00:29:08,269 --> 00:29:10,235 and served it to him on an ice cream cone. 624 00:29:10,369 --> 00:29:11,435 - Let's definitely give it back. 625 00:29:11,569 --> 00:29:12,836 - Mm... - Mm... 626 00:29:12,969 --> 00:29:14,134 Where's the gift bags? 627 00:29:14,268 --> 00:29:15,268 You put them right here. 628 00:29:15,401 --> 00:29:16,968 Sunjay, do you have the bags? 629 00:29:17,101 --> 00:29:19,934 - Hold your horses. Breakfast is almost ready. 630 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:23,200 - No, no, no, no, no. Ameet. 631 00:29:23,333 --> 00:29:25,166 - Oh yeah, Ameet came over. 632 00:29:25,300 --> 00:29:28,099 We ordered Indian food from his parent's place last night. 633 00:29:28,165 --> 00:29:30,099 Oh, should I make pancakes instead? 634 00:29:30,165 --> 00:29:32,098 - Wait, Ameet has the diamond? 635 00:29:32,231 --> 00:29:34,265 That idiot you work for? - Do gigs for. 636 00:29:34,398 --> 00:29:36,365 - So, what should I tell Percy then? 637 00:29:36,498 --> 00:29:37,964 - Why? Is he on the phone right now? 638 00:29:38,097 --> 00:29:39,564 - I don't like texting. 639 00:29:39,697 --> 00:29:43,130 It makes my fingers wrinkly, and I just got them Botoxed. 640 00:29:43,264 --> 00:29:44,696 Well, that was rude. 641 00:29:44,830 --> 00:29:46,630 - I don't want my eyes scooped. I like my eyes. 642 00:29:46,763 --> 00:29:48,930 It's one of my best features next to my cheekbones. 643 00:29:49,096 --> 00:29:50,462 - Really? I'd rate cheekbones first. 644 00:29:50,595 --> 00:29:51,996 Look, you're not gonna get scoopy-eyed. 645 00:29:52,128 --> 00:29:53,362 I can fix this. 646 00:29:53,495 --> 00:29:54,996 We go to Ameet's, get the bags, and done. 647 00:29:55,128 --> 00:29:56,528 - Oh, perfect. 648 00:29:56,661 --> 00:29:58,427 - Ah, but wait, Sheila. You're on the hook too. 649 00:29:58,561 --> 00:30:01,360 If we can't fix this, Percy will probably scoopy-eye you. 650 00:30:01,493 --> 00:30:03,627 - He wouldn't dare scoopy-eye me. 651 00:30:03,760 --> 00:30:05,126 No one scoopy-eyes Sheila. 652 00:30:05,260 --> 00:30:07,026 If anything, I'm the one that does the scoopy-eying. 653 00:30:07,159 --> 00:30:08,826 - Why don't you call and ask him? 654 00:30:08,959 --> 00:30:10,559 - Hmm. 655 00:30:10,692 --> 00:30:13,458 - So, we do this, and you get us into Kavita's Diwali party. 656 00:30:13,591 --> 00:30:15,858 - Are you seriously bargaining over possible death? 657 00:30:15,992 --> 00:30:19,224 - Look, I hate that bitch, but it's the party of a lifetime. 658 00:30:19,357 --> 00:30:21,957 Weekend social banger extravaganza. 659 00:30:32,488 --> 00:30:34,989 - Well played, Surina. Well played. 660 00:30:35,121 --> 00:30:36,522 It's a deal. 661 00:30:36,655 --> 00:30:38,287 - I still have to meet Rishi before he flies out. 662 00:30:38,420 --> 00:30:39,854 - We'll find the diamond, meet up with Rishi, 663 00:30:39,988 --> 00:30:42,020 crash Kavita's party. Boom, figured out. 664 00:30:42,153 --> 00:30:43,153 - Oh, this is fun. 665 00:30:43,287 --> 00:30:44,620 It's like "Lord of the Rings". 666 00:30:44,753 --> 00:30:46,086 I'm the beautiful elf princess 667 00:30:46,219 --> 00:30:47,820 and you're my trusty, hairy hobbits. 668 00:30:49,119 --> 00:30:52,051 Come on, Frodo. 669 00:30:54,986 --> 00:30:56,751 - Hey, are you sure about this? 670 00:30:56,885 --> 00:30:59,150 - When have I ever let you down? 671 00:30:59,284 --> 00:31:01,483 - Third grade, Mrs. Finney's class when you said to jump 672 00:31:01,617 --> 00:31:04,149 from the jungle gym on three and you chickened out. 673 00:31:04,283 --> 00:31:06,550 - And that day you learned you're much braver than I am. 674 00:31:06,683 --> 00:31:08,916 You're welcome. - When you totaled my car 675 00:31:09,082 --> 00:31:10,983 and my parents grounded me for six months. 676 00:31:11,115 --> 00:31:13,082 - Which made you anti-social, only study, 677 00:31:13,148 --> 00:31:16,081 and landed you a full ride at Harvard. 678 00:31:16,147 --> 00:31:18,147 Come on, girl. Through everything, 679 00:31:18,281 --> 00:31:20,680 I've always had your back. 680 00:31:20,814 --> 00:31:22,080 Trust me. 681 00:31:23,146 --> 00:31:24,380 - Oh, should I wear the new- 682 00:31:24,514 --> 00:31:26,079 - Pants, pants with the mm top? - Mm top? 683 00:31:26,212 --> 00:31:28,112 - Yeah. - Yes. 684 00:31:28,246 --> 00:31:29,713 Come on, Jerry. 685 00:31:29,846 --> 00:31:31,912 - Dope. 686 00:31:38,811 --> 00:31:41,077 - So let me get this straight. 687 00:31:41,210 --> 00:31:45,343 You have no idea where the diamond is? 688 00:31:45,476 --> 00:31:48,576 A $12 million diamond, that personally, 689 00:31:48,710 --> 00:31:52,775 I would let caress my insides. 690 00:31:52,909 --> 00:31:53,942 - I can find it. 691 00:31:54,075 --> 00:31:55,474 I just need a little more time. 692 00:31:55,608 --> 00:31:58,074 - Oh, Danny boy. 693 00:31:58,207 --> 00:32:00,474 I brought you on to make my life easier, 694 00:32:00,608 --> 00:32:03,840 not to create a bloody train wreck. 695 00:32:03,974 --> 00:32:06,073 Don't get me wrong. I like you. 696 00:32:06,139 --> 00:32:07,606 I do! 697 00:32:07,739 --> 00:32:13,072 Yeah, I mean, you come highly, highly recommended. 698 00:32:13,205 --> 00:32:15,471 - I will find it. 699 00:32:15,605 --> 00:32:18,071 I don't want to end up like George. 700 00:32:18,204 --> 00:32:19,437 - What do you mean? 701 00:32:19,570 --> 00:32:23,904 - Ice cream scooped. You scoopy-eyed him. 702 00:32:24,070 --> 00:32:26,202 - Whoops. 703 00:32:26,336 --> 00:32:30,669 So, George has a congenital birth condition. 704 00:32:30,803 --> 00:32:32,435 Yeah. 705 00:32:32,568 --> 00:32:33,969 You've got to be more sensitive in the workplace, all right? 706 00:32:34,101 --> 00:32:36,435 Not this ableist arsehole. 707 00:32:36,568 --> 00:32:38,901 We had the whole HR meeting and everything. 708 00:32:39,067 --> 00:32:41,634 - Yeah, yeah, look, I have her number. 709 00:32:41,767 --> 00:32:42,834 - Oh. 710 00:32:42,968 --> 00:32:44,733 - We can track her. 711 00:32:44,867 --> 00:32:47,132 - There you go. Perfect. 712 00:32:49,365 --> 00:32:52,565 Handle this. - Okay. 713 00:32:52,699 --> 00:32:58,064 - I wouldn't want you to end up like Herman. 714 00:32:59,464 --> 00:33:01,396 - Those bags are sold-a-mundo. Every last thing in them. 715 00:33:01,530 --> 00:33:03,230 - You're kidding? - Oh, I thought you'd be happy. 716 00:33:03,363 --> 00:33:05,063 Your tab is cleared and then some. 717 00:33:05,196 --> 00:33:06,063 I mean, those bags were incredible. 718 00:33:06,196 --> 00:33:07,729 Tiffany bracelet, Chanel wallet. 719 00:33:07,863 --> 00:33:09,562 - Oh, honey, those bags were trash compared 720 00:33:09,696 --> 00:33:10,829 to my next party. 721 00:33:10,963 --> 00:33:12,629 You should come. 722 00:33:12,762 --> 00:33:14,661 - I'm Ameet. - Sheila. 723 00:33:14,795 --> 00:33:16,761 The party's gonna be catered by St Laurent. 724 00:33:16,895 --> 00:33:18,228 They do food now. 725 00:33:18,361 --> 00:33:20,193 - Wow. - Who bought the bags, Ameet? 726 00:33:20,327 --> 00:33:23,093 - Ameet Corp LLC has a strict confidentiality policy 727 00:33:23,227 --> 00:33:26,092 and uh, I'm not gonna violate it for you. 728 00:33:28,125 --> 00:33:29,159 - Tell us who bought them. 729 00:33:29,292 --> 00:33:32,492 - I knew this day would come. 730 00:33:32,625 --> 00:33:35,525 Ah, the tension between us is so thick. 731 00:33:38,290 --> 00:33:39,357 Why would you do that? 732 00:33:41,257 --> 00:33:42,757 Please stop. Jesus Christ, okay. 733 00:33:42,891 --> 00:33:45,223 I gave it to this couple, the Mittals, I owed them money. 734 00:33:45,356 --> 00:33:47,056 - You owe them money? You owe me money. 735 00:33:47,122 --> 00:33:48,490 - I know the Mittals. 736 00:33:48,623 --> 00:33:50,655 They run that trendy, sustainable clothing line. 737 00:33:50,789 --> 00:33:52,222 Which I do not understand. 738 00:33:52,355 --> 00:33:54,222 Why would you wear clothes more than once? 739 00:33:54,355 --> 00:33:57,221 - I'll tell. 6530 North Sedgewick Street. 740 00:33:57,354 --> 00:34:00,654 - We can pick up the L around the corner. 741 00:34:03,653 --> 00:34:06,687 - Hey, I'm coming back for my money. 742 00:34:06,820 --> 00:34:08,486 - Bye, Melanie. 743 00:34:14,952 --> 00:34:17,451 - People actually use this? 744 00:34:17,585 --> 00:34:20,050 - You've seriously never been on the L? 745 00:34:20,116 --> 00:34:21,684 - In a nightmare once. 746 00:34:21,817 --> 00:34:23,183 Judi Dench was there too. 747 00:34:23,317 --> 00:34:27,449 She wouldn't stop giving me marigolds. 748 00:34:30,516 --> 00:34:32,281 You know I'd be willing to take you on. 749 00:34:32,415 --> 00:34:34,849 - What? - For as long as I've known you, 750 00:34:35,048 --> 00:34:36,315 you've been into Melanie. 751 00:34:36,448 --> 00:34:38,647 Why haven't you asked her out yet? 752 00:34:38,781 --> 00:34:41,447 - I don't know. I've tried, but... 753 00:34:41,581 --> 00:34:44,913 she just sees me as this little- - Bitch? 754 00:34:45,046 --> 00:34:46,580 - I was gonna say brother. 755 00:34:46,713 --> 00:34:49,512 - But bitch is probably more appropriate. 756 00:34:49,645 --> 00:34:50,712 - A little rude. 757 00:34:50,846 --> 00:34:53,178 - I can help you. - Really? 758 00:34:53,312 --> 00:34:56,544 - Listen, I'm no miracle worker. 759 00:34:59,044 --> 00:35:01,810 - But? - No, that's it. 760 00:35:01,944 --> 00:35:03,543 - Oh. 761 00:35:03,677 --> 00:35:06,176 - So, we get to the Mittals, and then we're going to Rishi's. 762 00:35:06,310 --> 00:35:09,042 - You'll have plenty of time to catch him before his flight. 763 00:35:09,175 --> 00:35:10,809 You gotta admit, this is a little fun. 764 00:35:10,943 --> 00:35:12,909 This is what a Rishi-free life looks like. 765 00:35:13,041 --> 00:35:14,408 - Yeah, sign me up. 766 00:35:14,541 --> 00:35:16,875 Nothing beats being chased by a homicidal maniac. 767 00:35:17,041 --> 00:35:18,608 - You love me. 768 00:35:20,373 --> 00:35:21,941 Oh shit, Daniel. 769 00:35:22,073 --> 00:35:23,540 - Here's what's gonna happen. We're gonna go up those stairs. 770 00:35:23,674 --> 00:35:25,473 You're gonna give me the diamond 771 00:35:25,606 --> 00:35:27,806 and then we're all gonna walk away like this never happened. 772 00:35:27,940 --> 00:35:30,039 - We don't have the diamond. 773 00:35:30,139 --> 00:35:32,438 You have such strong arms. - I'm not playin' around. 774 00:35:32,572 --> 00:35:34,071 - No, no, we're not lying. 775 00:35:34,205 --> 00:35:35,638 We had the diamond in Mel's gift bag, 776 00:35:35,772 --> 00:35:38,070 then this guy named Ameet, who I do gigs for, not work for, 777 00:35:38,204 --> 00:35:39,604 took it because I owed him money, 778 00:35:39,737 --> 00:35:41,404 then he gave it off to these greenwear entrepreneurs 779 00:35:41,537 --> 00:35:42,771 because he owed them money. 780 00:35:42,904 --> 00:35:45,102 See? It's a simple explanation, really. 781 00:35:45,236 --> 00:35:47,269 So, your jawline, God made no mistakes. 782 00:35:47,403 --> 00:35:49,936 - Enough! Start walkin'. 783 00:35:50,068 --> 00:35:52,335 One peep and I pull the trigger. 784 00:35:53,469 --> 00:35:55,701 - What the hell's going on? 785 00:35:55,835 --> 00:35:58,668 - That is so Percy to send one of his henchmen to kill us. 786 00:35:58,801 --> 00:36:00,601 - Shut up and get in front of them. 787 00:36:00,734 --> 00:36:03,467 Move. 788 00:36:06,233 --> 00:36:08,365 - Ah, I'm dangerous! 789 00:36:08,499 --> 00:36:10,933 That bitch has a sai! 790 00:36:11,065 --> 00:36:12,032 - Stop right there. 791 00:36:12,165 --> 00:36:13,331 - Clever girl. 792 00:36:14,331 --> 00:36:15,765 - That was smart. - Thanks. 793 00:36:15,898 --> 00:36:17,097 - On the ground. 794 00:36:17,231 --> 00:36:18,164 - I didn't think this far ahead though. 795 00:36:18,298 --> 00:36:19,831 - On the ground! 796 00:36:20,030 --> 00:36:21,664 - Sheila doesn't do ground. 797 00:36:23,797 --> 00:36:25,563 - I just want to let you know you're all being detained 798 00:36:25,696 --> 00:36:26,796 for carrying a deadly weapon. 799 00:36:26,930 --> 00:36:28,729 - This is totally because we're brown. 800 00:36:28,863 --> 00:36:33,094 This is systemic racism, xenophobia and frankly, 801 00:36:33,228 --> 00:36:34,662 Islamophobia. 802 00:36:34,795 --> 00:36:37,160 - Are one of you Muslim? - I am. 803 00:36:37,294 --> 00:36:38,461 - I didn't know you were Muslim. 804 00:36:38,594 --> 00:36:39,828 - Everyone's a little Muslim, Surina. 805 00:36:40,027 --> 00:36:41,060 Get with the times. 806 00:36:41,194 --> 00:36:43,326 Hi, excuse me, sir. 807 00:36:43,460 --> 00:36:45,259 I can't be here with these people, 808 00:36:45,393 --> 00:36:47,426 so, if you wanted to reach into my pocket, 809 00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:51,459 there should be a fresh, crisp Franklin waiting for you. 810 00:36:51,592 --> 00:36:53,525 Oh, actually I used that to shoo away an old woman. 811 00:36:53,659 --> 00:36:54,892 Do you take Dogecoin? 812 00:36:55,024 --> 00:36:56,891 - Ma'am, I'm gonna need you to shut up. 813 00:36:57,057 --> 00:37:01,256 Get comfy 'cause y'all gonna be here for a while. 814 00:37:01,390 --> 00:37:03,690 Wait a second. 815 00:37:03,824 --> 00:37:05,023 You're famous. 816 00:37:05,156 --> 00:37:07,522 - Oh, here we go again. 817 00:37:07,656 --> 00:37:10,155 Scripps National Spelling Bee champ '04. 818 00:37:10,289 --> 00:37:11,722 It happens all the time. 819 00:37:11,856 --> 00:37:13,354 - I don't know what the hell you're talking about. 820 00:37:13,488 --> 00:37:14,888 Stick girl? 821 00:37:16,655 --> 00:37:18,555 Yo, can I get a picture? 822 00:37:18,688 --> 00:37:20,187 My girlfriend loves you. 823 00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:23,020 Oh, the song, that remix. 824 00:37:23,153 --> 00:37:25,252 ♪ Yo, beat that boy with a stick, boy ♪ 825 00:37:25,386 --> 00:37:27,820 ♪ Keep it thick like say what ♪ 826 00:37:28,019 --> 00:37:30,286 - Yep, that's me. I'm stick girl. 827 00:37:30,419 --> 00:37:34,485 - You sure are. 828 00:37:34,618 --> 00:37:37,918 Just right there. Oh, that's a good one. 829 00:37:38,050 --> 00:37:39,117 That's a good one. 830 00:37:39,250 --> 00:37:42,017 That song is a bop, okay? 831 00:37:42,083 --> 00:37:44,850 It's like if someone bottled up the music of a generation 832 00:37:45,016 --> 00:37:48,349 and served it on ice on a hot day. 833 00:37:48,483 --> 00:37:51,015 Ah. Okay, real quick just... 834 00:37:52,348 --> 00:37:55,047 - Jerry, don't. - It's all good. 835 00:37:55,181 --> 00:37:57,214 Tonight is Diwali. 836 00:37:57,347 --> 00:37:59,581 A special holiday about friendship, 837 00:37:59,714 --> 00:38:02,580 love and camaraderie. 838 00:38:02,713 --> 00:38:06,013 This is your journey. 839 00:38:06,079 --> 00:38:08,012 Stay fresh, girl. 840 00:38:10,579 --> 00:38:13,912 - Feast on this, pigs! 841 00:38:14,044 --> 00:38:15,445 - Freeze! 842 00:38:19,610 --> 00:38:21,644 - Run for it! 843 00:38:21,777 --> 00:38:23,410 Remember me. 844 00:38:23,544 --> 00:38:25,709 - Don't leave me. 845 00:38:28,309 --> 00:38:30,543 - Damn you, stick girl. 846 00:38:37,474 --> 00:38:40,073 - Did we lose Surina and Mel? 847 00:38:40,207 --> 00:38:41,641 How are you not out of breath? 848 00:38:41,774 --> 00:38:43,440 - Oh, I got a lung transplant a couple of years ago. 849 00:38:43,573 --> 00:38:44,807 - I didn't know that. What was wrong? 850 00:38:45,006 --> 00:38:46,273 - Nothing. I just wanted new lungs. 851 00:38:46,406 --> 00:38:48,006 Anyway, I'm glad we're alone. 852 00:38:48,139 --> 00:38:50,772 We can finally start the first session of the Sheila method. 853 00:38:50,906 --> 00:38:51,772 - Oh. 854 00:38:51,906 --> 00:38:55,204 Ow. Wh-- Ow. Why? 855 00:38:55,337 --> 00:38:56,371 Ah, stop that! 856 00:38:56,504 --> 00:38:57,671 - You're pathetic. 857 00:38:57,805 --> 00:38:59,271 You've spent your life following a girl 858 00:38:59,404 --> 00:39:01,003 who doesn't even like you. 859 00:39:01,103 --> 00:39:03,570 You're always wearing the same Express sweater-shirt combo. 860 00:39:03,703 --> 00:39:05,537 And you reek of CK One. 861 00:39:05,670 --> 00:39:09,502 You are weak. 862 00:39:12,002 --> 00:39:14,067 - Wait. 863 00:39:24,534 --> 00:39:25,999 - I hope Sheila and Sunjay are okay. 864 00:39:26,065 --> 00:39:28,433 - They're not answering. 865 00:39:28,566 --> 00:39:29,999 - We have to call the police. 866 00:39:30,099 --> 00:39:31,498 - Are you kidding me? I'm not going out like Jerry. 867 00:39:31,632 --> 00:39:32,665 And he's white. 868 00:39:32,799 --> 00:39:36,365 - How did Daniel even find us? 869 00:39:36,498 --> 00:39:38,531 He must've tracked us with our phones. 870 00:39:38,664 --> 00:39:41,397 - Oh, that gorgeous, clever son of a bitch. 871 00:39:41,531 --> 00:39:43,463 We gotta break 'em. 872 00:39:43,596 --> 00:39:46,563 - We gotta what? 873 00:39:46,696 --> 00:39:49,262 - Here. Give me your phone. 874 00:39:49,395 --> 00:39:52,228 Trust me. I binge Mr. Robot. 875 00:39:52,362 --> 00:39:54,128 Okay, we gotta break yours first. 876 00:39:54,262 --> 00:39:55,327 - Why mine first? 877 00:39:55,461 --> 00:39:56,994 - Yours is an 11. Mine's a 12. 878 00:39:57,060 --> 00:39:58,594 - What difference does that make? 879 00:39:58,728 --> 00:40:00,161 - We should break the lower model one first. 880 00:40:00,294 --> 00:40:01,660 - Well, it's basically the same except for the camera. 881 00:40:01,794 --> 00:40:04,593 - Not true, the 11 can only manage 996 by 1820, 882 00:40:04,727 --> 00:40:08,292 a meager 452... Okay, we do them both at the same time. 883 00:40:08,426 --> 00:40:09,793 On the count of three. 884 00:40:09,925 --> 00:40:11,592 One, two, three. 885 00:40:11,726 --> 00:40:15,291 - Aah! - Aah! 886 00:40:15,425 --> 00:40:18,458 It was the right thing to do. 887 00:40:18,591 --> 00:40:20,123 - We could've just put them in a locker. 888 00:40:20,257 --> 00:40:21,524 Also, he wasn't tracking yours. 889 00:40:21,657 --> 00:40:22,923 He only had my number. 890 00:40:23,056 --> 00:40:24,823 - Shh, Mel. It was the right thing to do. 891 00:40:26,122 --> 00:40:27,055 - Wait, we're here. 892 00:40:27,189 --> 00:40:29,022 - Oh, thank God. 893 00:40:29,156 --> 00:40:30,556 - We need a plan. - Right. 894 00:40:30,689 --> 00:40:32,155 We go in and say, hey, can you give us the diamond? 895 00:40:32,288 --> 00:40:33,988 And then they give it to us. - That's not gonna work. 896 00:40:34,121 --> 00:40:35,422 They may not even know they have it. 897 00:40:35,555 --> 00:40:37,521 - How do you miss a 35-carat diamond? 898 00:40:37,654 --> 00:40:39,087 - You know sometimes when something is way down 899 00:40:39,220 --> 00:40:41,421 in a gift bag, it like, mixes with the paper stuffing. 900 00:40:41,554 --> 00:40:43,486 And if it's a lot of stuffing, there's just a lot of folds 901 00:40:43,620 --> 00:40:44,887 and crevices to navigate. 902 00:40:45,019 --> 00:40:46,319 - Right, I never thought about it like that. 903 00:40:46,453 --> 00:40:48,186 Mel, no. 904 00:40:48,319 --> 00:40:51,452 - Namaste. - Namaste. 905 00:41:02,350 --> 00:41:05,850 - I didn't know Indians could appropriate their own culture. 906 00:41:05,983 --> 00:41:07,883 - Seriously. 907 00:41:08,015 --> 00:41:10,682 - Who wants some small bites? 908 00:41:10,816 --> 00:41:14,014 - What? No way. Look at this spread. 909 00:41:14,148 --> 00:41:17,548 - We make it a point to feed any guest who comes to our home. 910 00:41:17,681 --> 00:41:20,347 It's such a privilege for us to provide. 911 00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:22,080 - It's a privilege to consume. 912 00:41:22,213 --> 00:41:24,447 - I hope you don't mind we eat with our hands here 913 00:41:24,580 --> 00:41:25,979 like our ancestors. 914 00:41:26,112 --> 00:41:28,679 - How else am I supposed to honor them? 915 00:41:30,012 --> 00:41:31,879 - So, I know this is really random, 916 00:41:32,011 --> 00:41:34,645 but you got something from Ameet yesterday at his restaurant. 917 00:41:34,779 --> 00:41:36,211 In one of those bags was a- 918 00:41:36,345 --> 00:41:39,378 - Oh, I know what you're talking about. That was yours. 919 00:41:39,512 --> 00:41:42,044 - Yeah. - Let me go get it. 920 00:41:43,110 --> 00:41:45,277 - So what color is your aura today? 921 00:41:45,411 --> 00:41:48,110 Mine's fuchsia. 922 00:41:49,676 --> 00:41:51,309 - Those were in the gift bag? 923 00:41:51,443 --> 00:41:52,843 - Oh, this was just a sampling. 924 00:41:52,976 --> 00:41:56,809 There were vibrators, ball gags, anal beads, anal probes, 925 00:41:56,975 --> 00:41:59,742 anal tinglers, anal tumblers, prostate pinchers, 926 00:41:59,876 --> 00:42:01,341 prostate punchers. 927 00:42:01,474 --> 00:42:03,040 - No, but the punchers were more of a pinch, babe. 928 00:42:03,174 --> 00:42:04,408 - Oh, that's right. 929 00:42:04,541 --> 00:42:06,441 Questionable marketing with those. 930 00:42:06,574 --> 00:42:07,740 - Jesus, Sheila. 931 00:42:07,874 --> 00:42:09,306 - No, no, no, no, it was more something 932 00:42:09,440 --> 00:42:11,673 that you don't stick in you. 933 00:42:11,807 --> 00:42:14,272 - Oh, but you don't stick this in you. 934 00:42:14,406 --> 00:42:15,972 It's a clitoral stimulator. 935 00:42:16,038 --> 00:42:20,438 It goes right under the clitoral hood just like that. 936 00:42:20,571 --> 00:42:21,705 - Can you see? It's right... 937 00:42:21,838 --> 00:42:23,671 - You know what? Let me just show you. 938 00:42:23,805 --> 00:42:25,303 - Oh, I'm fine. - No, it's okay. 939 00:42:25,437 --> 00:42:26,970 She's a sex yogi. - I'm a sex yogi. 940 00:42:27,036 --> 00:42:28,404 - I'm certified as well in case you're not comfortable 941 00:42:28,537 --> 00:42:29,837 with same-gender intimacy. 942 00:42:29,970 --> 00:42:31,803 Get the coconut oil. - No. 943 00:42:31,969 --> 00:42:33,603 - I don't know, Mel. It might help loosen you up. 944 00:42:33,736 --> 00:42:36,336 - Me and my clit are good. Just in here chillin'. 945 00:42:36,469 --> 00:42:39,268 Not stimulating needed. We're here for the diamond. 946 00:42:39,402 --> 00:42:41,869 - The diamond? - In a jewel box. 947 00:42:42,001 --> 00:42:44,734 - We were very upset when Ameet gave us a diamond as payment. 948 00:42:44,868 --> 00:42:46,200 When he knows that Lena and I believe 949 00:42:46,334 --> 00:42:49,700 that diamonds carry very, very bad energy. 950 00:42:49,833 --> 00:42:53,566 - I would never stick a diamond up my vagina. 951 00:42:53,700 --> 00:42:55,432 - Baby, I wouldn't either. Come here. 952 00:42:55,565 --> 00:42:58,832 - Yeah. Totally. So, can we have it? 953 00:42:58,965 --> 00:43:01,364 - Yes. You'll take it? 954 00:43:01,498 --> 00:43:02,664 - Absolutely. 955 00:43:02,798 --> 00:43:05,631 - Oh my gosh, I'll go get it right now. 956 00:43:05,765 --> 00:43:07,764 - Thank you so much. 957 00:43:07,963 --> 00:43:11,697 - See? Told you we'd fix it. What? 958 00:43:18,862 --> 00:43:21,294 - This isn't too Indian for you? 959 00:43:21,428 --> 00:43:26,093 - No, I'm kinda diggin' it. Maybe I'm finding myself. 960 00:43:29,060 --> 00:43:31,259 - You should feel a little bit of tingle. 961 00:43:31,393 --> 00:43:32,760 - Do you have a phone I can use? 962 00:43:32,959 --> 00:43:36,025 - Oh, no. We don't believe in cell phones here. 963 00:43:36,159 --> 00:43:40,792 The only 5Gs we have are God, Greatness, Gratitude, 964 00:43:40,958 --> 00:43:45,224 Graciousness and Grandness. 965 00:43:46,190 --> 00:43:47,990 But we do have a landline in the guest room, 966 00:43:48,124 --> 00:43:50,757 down the hallway, third door on the right. 967 00:43:50,956 --> 00:43:53,590 Okay? Just past the manifestation fountain. 968 00:43:55,722 --> 00:43:56,822 Do you wanna smoke? 969 00:43:56,955 --> 00:43:59,856 - Uh, yeah. - Great. 970 00:44:04,421 --> 00:44:07,453 - What is this? - That's a South Asian delicacy, 971 00:44:07,587 --> 00:44:11,186 Malana cream, Himalayan hash. 972 00:44:12,487 --> 00:44:15,719 - Oh, shit. 973 00:44:29,950 --> 00:44:32,182 - Oh my God. 974 00:44:37,415 --> 00:44:38,682 - I got the diamond. 975 00:44:38,815 --> 00:44:40,315 - I have a thing to talk to you about. 976 00:44:40,448 --> 00:44:41,948 A Nikki Haley thing. 977 00:44:48,813 --> 00:44:50,813 - You can't just use the Nikki Haley code word 978 00:44:50,946 --> 00:44:53,480 for anything, Mel. You're abusing the system. 979 00:44:53,613 --> 00:44:56,112 - I need to show you something. 980 00:44:57,479 --> 00:44:59,846 Are you high? 981 00:44:59,978 --> 00:45:02,344 - Say hello to my little friend. 982 00:45:02,478 --> 00:45:04,311 Whoa, did that sound racist? 983 00:45:04,444 --> 00:45:05,944 I didn't mean for that to sound racist. 984 00:45:06,010 --> 00:45:07,844 - Are you serious right now? 985 00:45:07,976 --> 00:45:09,943 - Come on, take a hit. - Absolutely not. 986 00:45:10,043 --> 00:45:11,643 - Why? You smoke all the time. 987 00:45:11,777 --> 00:45:13,376 - I stopped for Rishi. 988 00:45:13,509 --> 00:45:14,942 - I didn't know this. 989 00:45:15,075 --> 00:45:16,609 - We made an agreement in therapy a couple of months ago. 990 00:45:16,743 --> 00:45:18,342 He hates the smell. 991 00:45:18,475 --> 00:45:20,208 - Oh, just as he agreed to not pound other vaginas for you. 992 00:45:20,341 --> 00:45:21,508 - Surina, stop. 993 00:45:21,641 --> 00:45:22,808 - I just find it so unbelievable Queen Kush 994 00:45:22,941 --> 00:45:24,308 stopped smoking for a man. 995 00:45:24,440 --> 00:45:25,940 - Well, Queen Kush smoked a lot in her life. 996 00:45:26,006 --> 00:45:27,574 It's time for her to grow up. 997 00:45:27,707 --> 00:45:28,707 - That's not the Queen Kush I know. 998 00:45:28,841 --> 00:45:30,107 She'd never change for anyone. 999 00:45:30,240 --> 00:45:31,939 - She's smart enough to make her own choices. 1000 00:45:32,005 --> 00:45:33,272 Why am I talking in the third person? 1001 00:45:33,406 --> 00:45:35,939 Here, give me that. 1002 00:45:39,739 --> 00:45:41,971 Happy? - Yes. Yes, I am. 1003 00:45:42,105 --> 00:45:44,604 - Jesus. When did weed get this strong? 1004 00:45:44,738 --> 00:45:45,970 - It's not weed. 1005 00:45:46,104 --> 00:45:49,336 It's Malana cream, Himalayan hash. 1006 00:45:49,470 --> 00:45:50,770 - What? - It's okay. 1007 00:45:50,936 --> 00:45:53,737 It's not as bad as... 1008 00:45:54,968 --> 00:45:58,502 Sorry, the walls were just talking to me. 1009 00:45:58,635 --> 00:46:00,501 They're really happy. 1010 00:46:00,634 --> 00:46:04,134 - No, no, no, no, no, no. This can't be happening. 1011 00:46:04,267 --> 00:46:05,835 - Okay, calm down. It's diluted. 1012 00:46:05,967 --> 00:46:06,933 It will wear off quickly. 1013 00:46:07,066 --> 00:46:08,667 Now what did you want to show me? 1014 00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:10,600 Is it in here? Is it a pedestal sink? 1015 00:46:10,734 --> 00:46:14,199 You know I fucks with pedestal sinks. 1016 00:46:14,332 --> 00:46:16,833 Holy Nikki Haley! - Please don't shut the door. 1017 00:46:16,965 --> 00:46:18,698 They're keeping us here against our will. 1018 00:46:18,832 --> 00:46:20,964 - Noted. Thank you. 1019 00:46:21,098 --> 00:46:23,498 Just one second, please. - Please help us. 1020 00:46:23,631 --> 00:46:25,430 - Oh my God. Oh my God. What are we gonna do? 1021 00:46:25,564 --> 00:46:27,030 - That's what I was saying, but no, you wanted 1022 00:46:27,163 --> 00:46:28,397 to smoke it up like Chong and Cheech. 1023 00:46:28,530 --> 00:46:29,930 - Cheech and Chong. - That's what I said. 1024 00:46:30,030 --> 00:46:31,262 - No, you said it reversed. Who does that? 1025 00:46:31,396 --> 00:46:32,796 - It's the same thing. It's two people's names. 1026 00:46:32,929 --> 00:46:34,262 - But never in that order. - Well, maybe Chong 1027 00:46:34,396 --> 00:46:35,929 wants to be first sometimes. - Hey, is everything 1028 00:46:35,995 --> 00:46:37,362 okay back there, girls? 1029 00:46:37,495 --> 00:46:39,295 Did you get lost by the manifestation fountain? 1030 00:46:39,428 --> 00:46:40,695 It happens all the time. 1031 00:46:40,829 --> 00:46:42,993 Literally and metaphorically by the fountain. 1032 00:46:43,127 --> 00:46:44,227 - Yeah, no, we're good. 1033 00:46:44,361 --> 00:46:45,960 We're just manifesting over here. 1034 00:46:46,094 --> 00:46:48,060 God, these people are psychos. We gotta get out of here. 1035 00:46:48,194 --> 00:46:50,393 That door. - We can't just leave them. 1036 00:46:50,526 --> 00:46:54,925 - What are we gonna do? Put them on our backs? 1037 00:46:55,058 --> 00:46:57,525 - I'm sorry, we'll try to donate to a reputable charity. 1038 00:46:57,659 --> 00:47:01,157 - Or request me on Venmo. At Surina not Williams. 1039 00:47:05,924 --> 00:47:07,023 David Diwali? 1040 00:47:07,156 --> 00:47:09,390 - You want some candy, kids? 1041 00:47:09,523 --> 00:47:11,757 Get in the van! 1042 00:47:11,923 --> 00:47:14,022 - Frosty! - Why? 1043 00:47:14,155 --> 00:47:18,289 Why would you sew buttons on to me? 1044 00:47:18,421 --> 00:47:19,621 - Aah! - Aah! 1045 00:47:19,755 --> 00:47:23,254 - Should we check on them? 1046 00:47:24,121 --> 00:47:26,354 - I'm sure they're fine. 1047 00:47:28,387 --> 00:47:31,152 Okay, I'm ready for my turmeric bath, baby. 1048 00:47:35,919 --> 00:47:37,618 - This is worth $12 million? 1049 00:47:37,752 --> 00:47:39,585 It looks like costume jewelry. 1050 00:47:40,918 --> 00:47:42,484 - Oh, smart. 1051 00:47:42,617 --> 00:47:45,184 Empty it all up 'cause we got tons of drinking ahead of us. 1052 00:47:45,317 --> 00:47:46,917 Oh, hey, we can pick up the L over there. 1053 00:47:47,050 --> 00:47:48,416 Head to Kavita's. 1054 00:47:48,550 --> 00:47:50,750 - No, I'm done. I'm not going to Kavita's. 1055 00:47:50,916 --> 00:47:52,383 - But we know Sheila's gonna be there. 1056 00:47:52,516 --> 00:47:56,615 We'll give her the diamond and then weekend social banger. 1057 00:47:56,749 --> 00:47:57,915 Did I miss something? 1058 00:47:58,048 --> 00:47:59,615 I thought we were having fun? 1059 00:47:59,749 --> 00:48:01,014 - How is this fun? 1060 00:48:01,147 --> 00:48:02,581 Somebody's been trying to kill us. 1061 00:48:02,715 --> 00:48:04,581 - Well, I mean, yeah, if you choose the one bad part, 1062 00:48:04,715 --> 00:48:05,947 it's not gonna sound great. 1063 00:48:06,081 --> 00:48:07,580 - I need to go to Rishi's. 1064 00:48:07,714 --> 00:48:09,080 - Why is it always about Rishi? 1065 00:48:09,213 --> 00:48:10,913 - Because at least I know what it is. 1066 00:48:11,013 --> 00:48:13,212 - What's that supposed to mean? 1067 00:48:13,346 --> 00:48:14,945 - When I'm with you, it's amazing, 1068 00:48:15,079 --> 00:48:17,079 but it's always pure chaos. 1069 00:48:17,212 --> 00:48:18,778 Hey, Surina, you want to hang out? 1070 00:48:18,911 --> 00:48:21,511 Sure. Explosion. 1071 00:48:21,645 --> 00:48:23,678 I just... 1072 00:48:23,812 --> 00:48:25,610 I can't do it anymore. 1073 00:48:25,744 --> 00:48:27,610 - I was just trying to help you have a good time, 1074 00:48:27,744 --> 00:48:29,077 have an amazing Diwali. 1075 00:48:29,210 --> 00:48:32,343 - Well, thank you, but I'm good. 1076 00:48:32,476 --> 00:48:34,909 - Ever since Rishi, you've become this over-protected, 1077 00:48:34,975 --> 00:48:36,642 watered-down version of yourself. 1078 00:48:36,775 --> 00:48:38,141 It's like I don't even matter. 1079 00:48:38,275 --> 00:48:41,141 - No, Surina. I became an adult. 1080 00:48:41,275 --> 00:48:43,140 Adults plan. - I plan. 1081 00:48:43,274 --> 00:48:44,940 - You change apartments every month. 1082 00:48:45,074 --> 00:48:46,441 - I'm a nomad at heart. 1083 00:48:46,574 --> 00:48:49,173 You know my 23andMe said I'm 40% Mongolian. 1084 00:48:49,306 --> 00:48:51,540 - Your dentist is some dude off Craigslist. 1085 00:48:51,673 --> 00:48:53,506 - Yeah, and I've only lost two teeth since. 1086 00:48:53,640 --> 00:48:55,439 - You graduate with honors, but you're still gig working 1087 00:48:55,572 --> 00:48:58,739 for a moron. 1088 00:48:58,905 --> 00:49:00,937 - That's just temporary. 1089 00:49:01,970 --> 00:49:03,671 - Look at your life, Surina. 1090 00:49:03,805 --> 00:49:06,503 I mean, what's your plan? 1091 00:49:06,637 --> 00:49:09,003 - I don't know, Melanie. 1092 00:49:09,136 --> 00:49:10,503 Can I say that? Is that okay? 1093 00:49:10,637 --> 00:49:14,069 I do not know. I don't have a plan. 1094 00:49:14,202 --> 00:49:16,469 You think I like living paycheck to paycheck? 1095 00:49:16,602 --> 00:49:18,601 Or crashing around at people's places being well aware 1096 00:49:18,735 --> 00:49:22,401 of how capable I am, but settling for less? 1097 00:49:22,535 --> 00:49:25,100 You're not the only one with big dreams, Mel. 1098 00:49:25,233 --> 00:49:26,933 Just 'cause my path isn't as neat as yours, 1099 00:49:27,067 --> 00:49:30,299 it doesn't mean I won't get there. 1100 00:49:30,433 --> 00:49:32,099 Rishi's place is just a few blocks away. 1101 00:49:32,232 --> 00:49:35,566 I'm sure you'll make it to him before he leaves. 1102 00:49:35,700 --> 00:49:38,065 Go! 1103 00:49:48,630 --> 00:49:49,896 - What are we doing? 1104 00:49:50,029 --> 00:49:51,630 We have to find Surina and Mel. 1105 00:49:51,763 --> 00:49:53,663 - Oh, Gucci. 1106 00:49:53,797 --> 00:49:58,529 - No, no, no! I'm not doing this anymore. 1107 00:49:58,662 --> 00:50:01,860 - Okay, Fendi, I understand, but Salvatore Ferragamo 1108 00:50:01,994 --> 00:50:03,628 does not deserve that. - Shut up! 1109 00:50:03,761 --> 00:50:07,193 Just for one second just shut your mouth. 1110 00:50:07,327 --> 00:50:09,859 You are literally batshit crazy. 1111 00:50:09,993 --> 00:50:12,592 A total complete lunatic. 1112 00:50:12,726 --> 00:50:15,092 And I think I figured out why. 1113 00:50:15,225 --> 00:50:18,191 Because in your real life, you're just a sad, 1114 00:50:18,325 --> 00:50:21,957 insecure rich girl that's been handed everything. 1115 00:50:22,091 --> 00:50:24,691 You're trapped in your boring, meaningless life. 1116 00:50:24,823 --> 00:50:27,324 You have no purpose. 1117 00:50:27,457 --> 00:50:30,523 I'm honestly embarrassed for you. 1118 00:50:41,455 --> 00:50:44,321 - Lesson complete. - What? 1119 00:50:44,454 --> 00:50:46,087 - You finally stood up for yourself. 1120 00:50:46,220 --> 00:50:48,620 You know your worth. 1121 00:50:48,753 --> 00:50:51,186 - Wait, is that what this was all about? 1122 00:50:51,320 --> 00:50:52,653 All the name-calling? 1123 00:50:52,787 --> 00:50:53,986 The pushing around? 1124 00:50:54,118 --> 00:50:55,419 That was all part of it? 1125 00:50:55,552 --> 00:50:58,485 - The Sheila method is cruel, but effective. 1126 00:50:58,619 --> 00:51:01,217 - That's why you threw me down a flight of stairs. 1127 00:51:01,351 --> 00:51:04,151 - Uh, yeah. Sure. That was part of it too. 1128 00:51:04,284 --> 00:51:06,350 One of the most important parts. 1129 00:51:06,483 --> 00:51:09,583 - Wow, I didn't know you had this side to you. 1130 00:51:09,717 --> 00:51:11,717 - Well, it's important to believe in yourself. 1131 00:51:11,883 --> 00:51:14,649 You'd be surprised what you can learn from your exes. 1132 00:51:14,783 --> 00:51:16,316 - You mean Percy? 1133 00:51:16,449 --> 00:51:19,381 The lunatic who's trying to murder us? 1134 00:51:19,515 --> 00:51:22,914 - Yeah. 1135 00:51:24,180 --> 00:51:26,614 - I'm gonna go find Surina and Mel. 1136 00:51:26,747 --> 00:51:29,180 Thanks, Sheila. 1137 00:51:30,746 --> 00:51:33,413 - Who's gonna carry my bags? 1138 00:51:33,546 --> 00:51:37,345 Hi, excuse me, can you carry these? 1139 00:51:38,612 --> 00:51:40,745 I'll just rebuy. 1140 00:51:46,577 --> 00:51:49,443 - Come on, come on. Please be here. 1141 00:51:50,876 --> 00:51:53,942 - Melanie, my doll! - Fuck me. 1142 00:51:54,075 --> 00:51:55,108 - What happened to you? 1143 00:51:55,242 --> 00:51:57,375 - Just a long day. 1144 00:51:57,509 --> 00:51:59,409 - You look like a bus hit you. 1145 00:51:59,542 --> 00:52:01,608 - Yep. 1146 00:52:01,741 --> 00:52:03,007 - You know- 1147 00:52:03,141 --> 00:52:04,708 - I don't care, Parveen Auntie. 1148 00:52:04,874 --> 00:52:07,573 I just do not care. 1149 00:52:07,707 --> 00:52:12,673 - I was going to say, I have been there. 1150 00:52:12,872 --> 00:52:16,439 Hoping something would just work out because it fit. 1151 00:52:16,572 --> 00:52:19,471 I never married. Never had kids. 1152 00:52:19,605 --> 00:52:22,738 Hated myself for years because of it. 1153 00:52:22,871 --> 00:52:26,337 But why? Really, why? 1154 00:52:26,470 --> 00:52:28,936 Who cares what the world wants from you. 1155 00:52:29,070 --> 00:52:30,569 Fuck them. 1156 00:52:30,703 --> 00:52:33,202 What do you want? 1157 00:52:33,336 --> 00:52:36,968 - Hello? - Mel, is that you? 1158 00:52:37,101 --> 00:52:41,068 Hello? Mel? 1159 00:52:44,867 --> 00:52:46,634 - Where are you going? 1160 00:52:46,768 --> 00:52:49,066 - To save a friendship. 1161 00:52:49,199 --> 00:52:50,999 Happy Diwali. 1162 00:52:51,133 --> 00:52:53,466 - Happy Diwali. 1163 00:52:55,699 --> 00:52:58,132 Did she gain weight? 1164 00:53:02,431 --> 00:53:04,097 - Hey, I see you in there. 1165 00:53:04,231 --> 00:53:06,096 You just changed the sign when I got here. 1166 00:53:06,230 --> 00:53:08,530 - You crazy witch! Go! 1167 00:53:11,430 --> 00:53:13,962 - What do you want? 1168 00:53:14,095 --> 00:53:15,962 - I'm sorry, Surina. 1169 00:53:16,095 --> 00:53:18,094 - You have to do better than that. 1170 00:53:18,228 --> 00:53:19,662 - It was never about Rishi. 1171 00:53:19,861 --> 00:53:23,094 He was just some stupid safety net. 1172 00:53:23,228 --> 00:53:26,627 The truth is, I'm scared, Surina. 1173 00:53:26,761 --> 00:53:28,294 I always thought I had it all figured out. 1174 00:53:28,427 --> 00:53:30,593 And now I have no clue. 1175 00:53:30,726 --> 00:53:33,059 Like when am I going to brush my teeth tonight? 1176 00:53:33,192 --> 00:53:36,292 The thought of not knowing horrifies me. 1177 00:53:36,425 --> 00:53:39,991 I don't have the courage to do what you do. 1178 00:53:40,125 --> 00:53:43,224 You didn't deserve what I said to you. 1179 00:53:43,357 --> 00:53:45,357 Can you forgive me? 1180 00:53:45,491 --> 00:53:48,590 Can you forgive Queen Kush? 1181 00:53:54,322 --> 00:53:58,555 - Oh no, I'm finishing this time. 1182 00:53:59,987 --> 00:54:04,187 Ah, so good. Get me a waffle. 1183 00:54:05,321 --> 00:54:08,153 - I love you. - Oh, I love you, Mel. 1184 00:54:08,287 --> 00:54:09,853 Wait, how did you know I'd be here? 1185 00:54:09,953 --> 00:54:13,852 - There's nothing better than hot chai after a long-ass day. 1186 00:54:15,852 --> 00:54:16,852 - You guys are okay. 1187 00:54:16,985 --> 00:54:18,351 - Seven blocks we ran. 1188 00:54:18,485 --> 00:54:20,551 I did not buy new lungs to use them like this. 1189 00:54:20,685 --> 00:54:24,217 - We got the diamond too. - Finally. 1190 00:54:26,350 --> 00:54:28,617 - Mel, I want to tell you something. 1191 00:54:28,751 --> 00:54:30,849 - Not now, Sunjay. Everyone's having a moment. 1192 00:54:30,915 --> 00:54:33,616 - Shut it, Surina! 1193 00:54:33,750 --> 00:54:38,115 Melanie, I've been by your side for God knows how long, 1194 00:54:38,248 --> 00:54:39,981 through thick and thin. 1195 00:54:40,115 --> 00:54:42,847 You mean everything to me. 1196 00:54:42,980 --> 00:54:45,681 I know that there's something there between us 1197 00:54:45,847 --> 00:54:50,313 and I think you do too. 1198 00:54:50,446 --> 00:54:51,979 - We're actually all just going to Kavita's. 1199 00:54:52,113 --> 00:54:53,846 Can we talk about this later? 1200 00:54:53,978 --> 00:54:56,212 - Of course. Yeah, totally. 1201 00:54:56,345 --> 00:54:58,178 Not a problem. 1202 00:54:58,312 --> 00:54:59,679 - Wait, for real? 1203 00:54:59,845 --> 00:55:02,611 - It's the weekend social banger extravaganza, 1204 00:55:02,745 --> 00:55:05,111 isn't it? - Damn sure is. 1205 00:55:05,244 --> 00:55:07,510 - Percy, I have your silly diamond. 1206 00:55:07,644 --> 00:55:08,943 And if you think I'm gonna give it back, 1207 00:55:09,076 --> 00:55:10,543 you're out of your mind. 1208 00:55:10,677 --> 00:55:13,542 It's stood between us for long enough. 1209 00:55:16,908 --> 00:55:18,341 Your whore diamond's driving northbound. 1210 00:55:18,475 --> 00:55:21,275 Go find it yourself. 1211 00:55:21,408 --> 00:55:23,008 So, he wants to kill all of us now. 1212 00:55:23,141 --> 00:55:24,007 - What did you do, Sheila? 1213 00:55:24,140 --> 00:55:27,040 - We're going to die. 1214 00:55:27,173 --> 00:55:28,407 - Why does this keep happening? 1215 00:55:28,540 --> 00:55:30,406 - You lot are a bunch of bloody idiots, aren't ya? 1216 00:55:30,539 --> 00:55:32,306 - Just take it easy you. 1217 00:55:32,439 --> 00:55:35,904 Sorry, I just... Your eyes. 1218 00:55:36,038 --> 00:55:38,372 I always get lost in your eyes. 1219 00:55:38,505 --> 00:55:40,272 - All right, Percy has a very special surprise for you, 1220 00:55:40,405 --> 00:55:42,404 so, get in the car. 1221 00:55:42,537 --> 00:55:44,237 - There's no way in hell we're all gonna fit in that. 1222 00:55:44,371 --> 00:55:45,704 - You'll fit. It seats five. 1223 00:55:45,837 --> 00:55:47,070 Comfortably. 1224 00:55:47,204 --> 00:55:48,436 - I bet it gets great gas mileage. 1225 00:55:48,570 --> 00:55:49,836 - Great for the environment. 1226 00:55:49,902 --> 00:55:51,503 - Can you call a private car for me? 1227 00:55:51,637 --> 00:55:54,835 - Everyone shut up and just move! 1228 00:55:56,669 --> 00:55:58,669 - I can't get in. There's all these books. 1229 00:55:58,835 --> 00:56:00,101 - All right. Get out of the way. 1230 00:56:00,234 --> 00:56:01,201 Out of the way. 1231 00:56:01,334 --> 00:56:02,867 - You're taking the LSAT? 1232 00:56:03,001 --> 00:56:05,101 - What do you think I just woke up one day and was like, 1233 00:56:05,234 --> 00:56:06,233 ah, I'm gonna be a hitman? 1234 00:56:06,367 --> 00:56:07,734 - Oh, a lawyer. 1235 00:56:07,866 --> 00:56:09,300 I didn't think I could get any more turned on. 1236 00:56:09,433 --> 00:56:11,865 - Wow, look, you think this life is easy? 1237 00:56:11,999 --> 00:56:14,099 'Cause the hours are shit. I get zero time off. 1238 00:56:14,232 --> 00:56:17,232 I don't see the girlfriend. I don't have a 401k. 1239 00:56:17,366 --> 00:56:18,897 - You need the 401k. - Exactly. 1240 00:56:19,031 --> 00:56:20,831 I need the 401k. 1241 00:56:20,897 --> 00:56:22,864 Do you know how many times I've had to wash blood 1242 00:56:22,998 --> 00:56:24,330 out of these hands? 1243 00:56:24,464 --> 00:56:26,863 There is no moisturizer on earth 1244 00:56:26,997 --> 00:56:30,162 that is prepared for that. 1245 00:56:30,296 --> 00:56:33,929 They all want you to be a hitman, 1246 00:56:34,062 --> 00:56:37,428 but maybe I'm just a hitboy. 1247 00:56:41,128 --> 00:56:42,728 - Go. Get out of here. 1248 00:56:42,860 --> 00:56:45,461 - Did he say girlfriend? - Surina, come. 1249 00:56:46,661 --> 00:56:48,560 - Now I see, maybe throwing a $12 million diamond 1250 00:56:48,693 --> 00:56:51,059 in the back of a pickup truck was a bit of an overreaction. 1251 00:56:51,193 --> 00:56:53,260 You should appreciate how much I restrained myself. 1252 00:56:53,393 --> 00:56:55,692 That Percy is a two-faced fake. 1253 00:56:55,825 --> 00:56:58,325 - Hold up. What did you just say? 1254 00:56:58,459 --> 00:56:59,857 - Oh, Surina, I say a lot of things. 1255 00:56:59,991 --> 00:57:01,258 - What is it? 1256 00:57:01,391 --> 00:57:02,957 - Fake. 1257 00:57:03,091 --> 00:57:05,458 This is worth $12 million? It looks like costume jewelry. 1258 00:57:05,591 --> 00:57:08,923 Oh my God, how'd I not see this before? 1259 00:57:09,056 --> 00:57:10,357 We gotta get to the L. 1260 00:57:13,189 --> 00:57:15,556 - We need waters on four. I'll give you your waters. 1261 00:57:16,522 --> 00:57:19,355 Oh. Hey. 1262 00:57:19,488 --> 00:57:20,588 If you're gonna put stuff in my mouth, 1263 00:57:20,722 --> 00:57:21,887 I'm asking for consent first. 1264 00:57:22,021 --> 00:57:23,154 - I can't believe we're doing this again, 1265 00:57:23,288 --> 00:57:25,153 but where is the diamond, Ameet? 1266 00:57:25,287 --> 00:57:27,220 - Whatever do you mean? 1267 00:57:28,621 --> 00:57:31,885 - Not urinal mist. This is worse than tomato. 1268 00:57:32,019 --> 00:57:32,885 - Don't try me. 1269 00:57:33,019 --> 00:57:34,019 - Hey, it's in my pocket. 1270 00:57:34,152 --> 00:57:35,818 It's in my front pocket. 1271 00:57:35,951 --> 00:57:38,485 Melanie can get it. 1272 00:57:40,918 --> 00:57:42,384 - Gross. 1273 00:57:42,517 --> 00:57:44,651 - You know, you probably all got a lot closer 1274 00:57:44,817 --> 00:57:47,050 and cemented your friendship in a way you never saw before. 1275 00:57:47,184 --> 00:57:48,350 - Shut up. - Shut up. 1276 00:57:48,483 --> 00:57:49,717 - Sheila, call Percy. 1277 00:57:49,849 --> 00:57:53,483 Ugh, fine. 1278 00:57:53,617 --> 00:57:55,215 - Hello? - Hey listen, asshole, 1279 00:57:55,349 --> 00:57:57,515 we have the diamond. - And who is this? 1280 00:57:57,649 --> 00:57:59,549 - Surina. Your worst nightmare. 1281 00:57:59,681 --> 00:58:00,814 - Maybe a notch down. 1282 00:58:00,914 --> 00:58:02,681 - Your second to worst nightmare. 1283 00:58:02,814 --> 00:58:06,113 - Well, it is a pleasure to meet you, Surina. 1284 00:58:06,247 --> 00:58:07,247 - Don't hurt him. 1285 00:58:07,380 --> 00:58:08,813 - Oh, you want your friend back? 1286 00:58:08,913 --> 00:58:11,313 Well, then just bring the diamond by midnight 1287 00:58:11,447 --> 00:58:14,279 to Kavita's party. Okay? 1288 00:58:14,412 --> 00:58:17,479 - Even Percy got invited? 1289 00:58:17,613 --> 00:58:20,546 - You ready to do this? 1290 00:58:23,045 --> 00:58:24,011 Your place first? 1291 00:58:24,144 --> 00:58:26,712 - Yeah. Definitely. 1292 00:58:27,678 --> 00:58:30,410 - Actually, wait. One more thing. 1293 00:58:30,544 --> 00:58:31,910 - Ah, so you've come to apologize? 1294 00:58:32,043 --> 00:58:34,110 - No, I just realized life's too short 1295 00:58:34,244 --> 00:58:37,809 to waste on an egotistical asshat like you. 1296 00:58:37,875 --> 00:58:40,009 I quit. 1297 00:58:47,442 --> 00:58:50,040 - Those two are fucking right. 1298 00:59:13,704 --> 00:59:17,669 - Holy shit, it's freezing mother, bitch, cock balls. 1299 00:59:18,935 --> 00:59:21,135 - Ah, these earrings are killing me. 1300 00:59:21,269 --> 00:59:23,569 I totally forgot we have no phones to call for a Lyft. 1301 00:59:23,702 --> 00:59:25,368 - I'm not walking to the L in these heels. 1302 00:59:27,901 --> 00:59:29,268 - Kal Penn? - Kal Penn? 1303 00:59:29,401 --> 00:59:30,567 - It's just Kal. Do y'all need a ride? 1304 00:59:30,701 --> 00:59:32,133 - Where'd you get a rickshaw? 1305 00:59:32,267 --> 00:59:35,500 - Come on, Santa's got a sleigh. I have a rickshaw. 1306 00:59:35,633 --> 00:59:37,700 But really it's for a role, very complicated. 1307 00:59:37,832 --> 00:59:39,099 - Can you get us to River North? 1308 00:59:39,233 --> 00:59:41,466 - Yeah, hop in. 1309 01:00:18,292 --> 01:00:20,292 - Oh, you're going to Kavita's. 1310 01:00:20,426 --> 01:00:21,758 - You've heard about it too? 1311 01:00:21,892 --> 01:00:23,226 - Yeah, it's only the biggest party of the year. 1312 01:00:23,359 --> 01:00:25,425 - Do you want to join us? - No, I'm okay. Thank you. 1313 01:00:25,558 --> 01:00:27,325 - Let me guess, you're prepping for a role? 1314 01:00:27,458 --> 01:00:29,624 - No, I just don't wanna go. - Oh. 1315 01:00:29,756 --> 01:00:32,057 - Hey, before you go, can I impart some words of wisdom? 1316 01:00:32,190 --> 01:00:34,756 - Go for it, Kal Penn. - Oh, it's just... 1317 01:00:34,890 --> 01:00:36,289 Never mind. 1318 01:00:36,423 --> 01:00:39,956 So, look, when I was younger, my um, buddy and I uh, 1319 01:00:40,089 --> 01:00:41,423 we had this goal, right? 1320 01:00:41,555 --> 01:00:44,555 We wanted to get the best burgers in America. 1321 01:00:44,689 --> 01:00:46,388 Ah, we had ups. We had downs. 1322 01:00:46,522 --> 01:00:47,820 We rode a cheetah. 1323 01:00:47,954 --> 01:00:49,287 But the best part of that journey 1324 01:00:49,421 --> 01:00:51,287 wasn't those delicious sliders. 1325 01:00:51,421 --> 01:00:54,320 It was discovering things in our friendship 1326 01:00:54,453 --> 01:00:56,186 that we just didn't know were possible. 1327 01:00:56,320 --> 01:00:59,286 And that friendship blossomed warranting two sequels 1328 01:00:59,420 --> 01:01:01,319 and a successful franchise. 1329 01:01:01,452 --> 01:01:02,785 - Did you just outline the plot to- 1330 01:01:02,885 --> 01:01:04,018 - I think I'd know the difference between 1331 01:01:04,152 --> 01:01:06,518 a movie I was in and real life, Melanie. 1332 01:01:06,651 --> 01:01:07,951 - You literally just called it a franchise. 1333 01:01:08,084 --> 01:01:11,017 - Yeah, 'cause it's the franchise of my life. 1334 01:01:11,151 --> 01:01:12,517 Anyway, it really doesn't matter what you do. 1335 01:01:12,650 --> 01:01:15,584 What matters is who you do it with. 1336 01:01:15,783 --> 01:01:20,416 So uh, smile like there's no tomorrow. 1337 01:01:20,549 --> 01:01:23,515 Dance like no one's watching 1338 01:01:23,648 --> 01:01:27,148 'cause life's too short to miss out on memories. 1339 01:01:30,780 --> 01:01:32,247 - Do you take drugs? 1340 01:01:32,380 --> 01:01:33,980 - Always. 1341 01:01:40,613 --> 01:01:41,978 - Oh, perfect. There's Sheila. 1342 01:01:47,245 --> 01:01:49,077 - This is the party of the year? 1343 01:01:49,211 --> 01:01:51,044 I'm embarrassed for her. 1344 01:01:51,177 --> 01:01:53,909 Oh, kulfi. 1345 01:01:56,410 --> 01:01:58,809 - You really need to find a better way to greet people. 1346 01:01:58,943 --> 01:02:01,576 - No, this works for me. Move. 1347 01:02:04,642 --> 01:02:06,774 Come on, let's go. 1348 01:02:12,640 --> 01:02:15,340 - Yay, you're here. 1349 01:02:15,473 --> 01:02:18,072 I wish we could've met under better circumstances, you know? 1350 01:02:18,206 --> 01:02:20,172 But here we are. 1351 01:02:21,272 --> 01:02:23,039 The diamond. 1352 01:02:29,504 --> 01:02:33,103 I was such a fool to ever think about letting you go. 1353 01:02:33,237 --> 01:02:36,636 Daddy's learned his lesson, okay? 1354 01:02:37,902 --> 01:02:40,203 You can do whatever you want with me. 1355 01:02:41,203 --> 01:02:44,768 Not that. Oh, you're so naughty. 1356 01:02:44,834 --> 01:02:49,967 - So um, sorry to interrupt, but you got your diamond. 1357 01:02:50,100 --> 01:02:51,767 Can we have Sunjay? 1358 01:02:51,900 --> 01:02:54,766 - Yeah, right. Uh, Daniel, 1359 01:02:54,866 --> 01:02:55,600 kill him. 1360 01:02:55,766 --> 01:02:57,433 - No! - No! 1361 01:02:57,567 --> 01:03:00,932 - How did you think this would end? 1362 01:03:01,065 --> 01:03:03,932 - You don't have to do this. 1363 01:03:06,264 --> 01:03:08,897 - This is so cute. Are you gonna jump? 1364 01:03:10,565 --> 01:03:13,896 Oh, careful with the dresses. 1365 01:03:14,664 --> 01:03:17,096 It's very "Thelma and Louise". 1366 01:03:17,230 --> 01:03:19,095 Hated that movie. 1367 01:03:27,328 --> 01:03:29,360 - I ruined that dress I borrowed last month. 1368 01:03:29,494 --> 01:03:32,327 I really wanted a jelly donut and I thought, okay, Surina, 1369 01:03:32,460 --> 01:03:35,459 you've gotta eat this carefully. This is Mel's dress. 1370 01:03:35,593 --> 01:03:39,326 But you really can't eat a jelly donut carefully, can you? 1371 01:03:39,459 --> 01:03:41,293 - It's okay. 1372 01:03:41,425 --> 01:03:44,125 You're the best thing to ever happen to me. 1373 01:03:44,258 --> 01:03:48,491 - Me too. I love you. 1374 01:03:50,124 --> 01:03:54,290 - Oh my God, don't make this any harder than it already is. 1375 01:03:54,423 --> 01:03:56,089 Shall I count to three? 1376 01:03:56,223 --> 01:03:59,123 Yeah, okay. Uh, one. 1377 01:04:00,355 --> 01:04:01,522 - Sheila. 1378 01:04:01,656 --> 01:04:03,022 - I brought some ball gags along. 1379 01:04:03,155 --> 01:04:05,321 I figured a little sex party could spice things up. 1380 01:04:05,454 --> 01:04:06,655 They'll break your fall. 1381 01:04:06,787 --> 01:04:08,754 - I'm not jumping into that. No way. 1382 01:04:08,820 --> 01:04:10,887 - Are, are they used? 1383 01:04:11,021 --> 01:04:12,320 - Gently. 1384 01:04:12,453 --> 01:04:14,053 Come on, girls. Jump. 1385 01:04:14,187 --> 01:04:15,920 - I'm taking my chances on the concrete. 1386 01:04:16,053 --> 01:04:18,452 - Mrs. Finney's class. That was a total dick move, 1387 01:04:18,586 --> 01:04:23,152 but I'm with you now. Trust me. 1388 01:04:23,285 --> 01:04:26,084 - Two. 1389 01:04:26,218 --> 01:04:28,884 Three. 1390 01:04:31,083 --> 01:04:33,350 - No! No! 1391 01:04:33,484 --> 01:04:35,483 - I didn't see that coming. 1392 01:04:40,949 --> 01:04:43,048 - This is all your fault. 1393 01:04:43,182 --> 01:04:45,848 - Aaah! 1394 01:04:45,981 --> 01:04:47,648 Oh no, the diamond. 1395 01:04:47,780 --> 01:04:49,481 Help me find the diamond, you idiot. 1396 01:04:49,614 --> 01:04:52,314 - Percy, it's down the drain. We've got to get out of here. 1397 01:04:53,214 --> 01:04:56,079 Ah, ah, ah, actual bunch of-- 1398 01:05:02,945 --> 01:05:04,878 - How's this for a change of pace? 1399 01:05:06,278 --> 01:05:09,744 - You always hurt the ones you love. 1400 01:05:09,844 --> 01:05:13,809 No, to the right. Your right. 1401 01:05:20,242 --> 01:05:22,442 - You are making the biggest mistake of your life. 1402 01:05:22,576 --> 01:05:24,774 Do you know who I am? Do you know who I am? 1403 01:05:24,908 --> 01:05:27,275 She-she. - Pe-Pe. 1404 01:05:28,642 --> 01:05:31,007 I didn't know they'd arrest you. You'll still call, right? 1405 01:05:31,140 --> 01:05:33,274 I can't live without your touch. 1406 01:05:37,173 --> 01:05:39,839 I'm gonna send you a really nice care package. 1407 01:05:39,972 --> 01:05:41,238 What's the address? 1408 01:05:41,372 --> 01:05:45,005 Just like...jail? 1409 01:05:45,138 --> 01:05:47,970 - So, are we superheroes now? 1410 01:05:48,104 --> 01:05:51,538 Is this our Avengers assemble moment? 1411 01:05:51,737 --> 01:05:54,236 - Some of us more than others. 1412 01:05:58,736 --> 01:06:00,302 - Oh shit, Kavita. 1413 01:06:00,435 --> 01:06:02,002 - You ruined my party and Diwali. 1414 01:06:02,135 --> 01:06:04,102 I swear to God, I will make it my absolute mission 1415 01:06:04,235 --> 01:06:05,934 to make sure all of your lives are a living hell. 1416 01:06:06,067 --> 01:06:09,234 - Maybe next time if you just invited us. 1417 01:06:12,267 --> 01:06:13,200 - Hey, Surina. 1418 01:06:13,333 --> 01:06:15,733 - Oh, if it isn't baby brother. 1419 01:06:15,833 --> 01:06:18,732 Call mommy when you're ready. 1420 01:06:18,865 --> 01:06:21,366 - Rahul! - Okay, okay. 1421 01:06:25,298 --> 01:06:28,898 - Oh, looks like someone missed his flight. 1422 01:06:37,496 --> 01:06:39,929 - Hey. - Hey. 1423 01:06:40,062 --> 01:06:42,428 Thought you had a flight. 1424 01:06:43,961 --> 01:06:47,161 - Some lady named Parveen just randomly showed up at my door 1425 01:06:47,294 --> 01:06:51,760 and cussed me out for an hour and she made me miss it. 1426 01:06:54,160 --> 01:06:56,959 I've been meaning to call you. 1427 01:06:57,093 --> 01:07:00,459 I shouldn't have told you the way that I did. 1428 01:07:00,592 --> 01:07:03,025 It was really awful of me. 1429 01:07:05,324 --> 01:07:08,091 I know you'll probably never forgive me 1430 01:07:08,224 --> 01:07:09,625 and I guess that's just something 1431 01:07:09,757 --> 01:07:11,823 I'm gonna have to accept. 1432 01:07:11,956 --> 01:07:14,956 - You lied and you cheated on me. 1433 01:07:15,090 --> 01:07:19,055 You really broke my heart, Rishi. 1434 01:07:20,623 --> 01:07:21,955 - I'm sorry. 1435 01:07:22,089 --> 01:07:25,221 - Look, I know we started to grow apart. 1436 01:07:25,355 --> 01:07:29,554 I wanted so badly to make it work. 1437 01:07:29,720 --> 01:07:32,187 That's why I kept forcing it. 1438 01:07:32,320 --> 01:07:35,153 It took me until today to realize that 1439 01:07:35,286 --> 01:07:38,386 we just wanted different things. 1440 01:07:38,520 --> 01:07:41,452 We were just too afraid to admit it to each other. 1441 01:07:41,585 --> 01:07:42,818 - Exactly. 1442 01:07:44,585 --> 01:07:47,151 Are you okay? 1443 01:07:47,284 --> 01:07:49,850 - Yeah. 1444 01:07:49,984 --> 01:07:51,950 So, what do we do now? 1445 01:07:52,084 --> 01:07:55,250 - Well, it's just kinda anti-climactic, um, 1446 01:07:55,383 --> 01:07:57,983 I don't know, do you wanna throw a drink at me 1447 01:07:58,116 --> 01:07:59,781 and call me an asshole or something? 1448 01:07:59,915 --> 01:08:01,382 - Actually, yeah. 1449 01:08:01,516 --> 01:08:03,349 Do you mind? 1450 01:08:03,482 --> 01:08:05,914 - Go for it. 1451 01:08:06,780 --> 01:08:08,714 - Just um, not the eyes though. 1452 01:08:08,780 --> 01:08:10,747 - Okay, stand back a bit. 1453 01:08:10,881 --> 01:08:12,614 - Is here good? - Yeah, perfect. 1454 01:08:12,746 --> 01:08:16,080 Asshole. 1455 01:08:16,813 --> 01:08:18,579 - How was that? Was that good? 1456 01:08:18,712 --> 01:08:21,712 Oh, no. 1457 01:08:22,246 --> 01:08:24,278 - Oh my God, you're on fire. 1458 01:08:24,411 --> 01:08:26,145 - Was it that good? Really? 1459 01:08:26,278 --> 01:08:27,878 See, I knew I should've pursued acting, 1460 01:08:28,011 --> 01:08:30,377 but you know how Desi parents are. 1461 01:08:30,511 --> 01:08:31,877 Put it out. Help me. 1462 01:08:32,010 --> 01:08:33,277 - Holy shit, she just torched him. 1463 01:08:33,410 --> 01:08:34,910 - Is this part of the Diwali ritual 1464 01:08:35,042 --> 01:08:37,842 because this is very exciting. 1465 01:08:40,709 --> 01:08:43,175 - Oh, excuse me, I'd like to place my order. 1466 01:08:43,308 --> 01:08:46,175 - No, Sheila. It's not that kinda place. 1467 01:08:50,541 --> 01:08:53,540 - Do you think we'll ever get invited to anything ever again? 1468 01:08:53,706 --> 01:08:55,173 - Probably not. 1469 01:08:55,306 --> 01:08:56,540 I'm a bit more worried I should add attempted murder 1470 01:08:56,706 --> 01:08:58,006 to my resume. 1471 01:08:58,140 --> 01:09:00,838 - Oh, and arson. 1472 01:09:01,972 --> 01:09:03,838 - You know what? 1473 01:09:03,972 --> 01:09:05,804 I can get used to this. 1474 01:09:05,937 --> 01:09:09,171 Being on the fringe. My own person. 1475 01:09:09,304 --> 01:09:13,036 - Oh, I swiped something from Kavita's. 1476 01:09:13,170 --> 01:09:15,504 - Not again. 1477 01:09:15,703 --> 01:09:19,603 - We can't end the night without lighting a candle. 1478 01:09:22,169 --> 01:09:23,734 Happy Diwali, Mel. 1479 01:09:23,868 --> 01:09:26,268 - Happy Diwali, Surina. 1480 01:09:31,367 --> 01:09:35,899 - So, about that vaginoplasty. - Surina, no. 1481 01:09:36,032 --> 01:09:38,699 - Come on. No more flapping. 1482 01:09:46,398 --> 01:09:48,131 - It's another one from your girl, Lily 1483 01:09:48,264 --> 01:09:49,498 This right here's a special one 1484 01:09:49,697 --> 01:09:53,330 for all the brown girls out there. 1485 01:09:53,463 --> 01:09:55,196 ♪ Beat that boy with a stick, boy ♪ 1486 01:09:55,330 --> 01:09:57,096 ♪ Light him up like a Bic, boy ♪ 1487 01:09:57,230 --> 01:09:58,995 ♪ Dang that fool was a cheat, boy ♪ 1488 01:09:59,129 --> 01:10:00,661 ♪ Now he gonna get de-stroyed ♪ 1489 01:10:00,795 --> 01:10:02,496 ♪ She's a stick girl in a stick world ♪ 1490 01:10:02,628 --> 01:10:04,496 ♪ She's a stick girl in a stick world ♪ 1491 01:10:04,628 --> 01:10:06,261 ♪ Take your pick, girl, it's your boss world ♪ 1492 01:10:06,394 --> 01:10:09,261 ♪ You haven't heard, she's a stick girl ♪