1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,000 Music: "Lakmé, act 1: The flower duet" by léo delibes 2 00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:20,840 H I la ry: Busty divorcee, fifties 3 00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:23,600 seeks energetic male, any age 4 00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:26,800 to share dinner, wine, and etcetera. 5 00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:30,920 Box 79. 6 00:00:31,320 --> 00:00:33,240 Doorbell rings 7 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:41,120 hilary: Shot her myself this morning, no time for hanging. 8 00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:44,360 Mid—season hen's best eaten 9 00:00:44,440 --> 00:00:47,760 as soon as they come out of rigor mortis, don't you agree? 10 00:00:49,720 --> 00:00:52,280 Wait there. I'll go and scare up some gravy. 11 00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:12,840 Few lumps 12 00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:17,000 but the odd giblet's not going to kill us, hey? 13 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:18,640 She chuckles 14 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:20,400 here's mud in your eye! 15 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:22,160 She chuckles 16 00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:30,000 oh, I do like a man who can guess my size. 17 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:33,800 Ooh! 18 00:01:35,560 --> 00:01:36,560 Ooh. 19 00:01:37,320 --> 00:01:39,280 Not quite what I had in mind but... 20 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:41,440 I'm game if you are. 21 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:47,480 How many corners are there in a kitten? 22 00:01:47,560 --> 00:01:48,920 She giggles 23 00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:52,400 how many, how many mittens in a rectangle? 24 00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:54,080 She laughs 25 00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:59,000 oh, these furry little blighters are blurring into one. 26 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:01,320 Ooh! 27 00:02:03,120 --> 00:02:06,480 Ooh, I think I might shut my eyes for a tick. 28 00:03:23,720 --> 00:03:24,760 Morning, sister. 29 00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:26,640 Yes, good morning to you, Peggy. 30 00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:31,600 Though, I doubt it's been a good morning for our hapless milkman. 31 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:34,800 Oh, I know. This is Terry's second old stiff this month. 32 00:03:34,880 --> 00:03:35,880 Poor Terry. 33 00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:41,280 Let's see if the unfortunate deceased has her own tale to tell. 34 00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:50,440 Felix: Hilary sympson—smythe, aged 58. 35 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:54,000 Likely cause of death, coronary heart disease. 36 00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:56,960 The Jigsaw puzzle is "you shall have no pie." 37 00:03:57,040 --> 00:04:00,560 Based on the nursery rhyme in which three kittens lose their mittens. 38 00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:02,560 Yeah. I'm familiar with the mother goose canon. 39 00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:06,000 Hardly thrilling enough to prompt a heart attack. 40 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:07,680 Camera clicks 41 00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:10,240 just me, or is there something wrong with this picture? 42 00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:12,960 Well, the picture and the puzzle. 43 00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:14,600 Meaning? 44 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:16,320 Piece missing, bottom left. 45 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:19,400 Question is why would anyone attempt a 200—piece puzzle 46 00:04:20,280 --> 00:04:22,080 with a face covered in cold cream? 47 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:23,320 Why indeed. 48 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:25,800 The greasy pieces are a puzzler's worst nightmare. 49 00:04:26,280 --> 00:04:30,720 Alright, maybe not the worst, but definitely top five. 50 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:32,960 Would you mind taking Peggy house to house? 51 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,400 See if anyone heard or saw anything last night. 52 00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:36,680 Sir. 53 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:44,520 Lily scent. Lanolin base note. 54 00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:47,480 How long would it take to do a 200—piece puzzle? 55 00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:50,040 Ah, um... 56 00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:53,240 Well, that can be expressed as n multiplied by n. 57 00:04:53,320 --> 00:04:56,160 So, a 200—piece puzzle is four times as difficult as a 100—piece 58 00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:59,560 while a 500 is 25 times harder than a 100—piece. 59 00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:01,840 The reason being that one must compare each Jigsaw piece 60 00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:03,360 to "n" other pieces. 61 00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:08,080 Quite a while. 62 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:09,720 Sam g ru nts 63 00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:11,320 unless she had help. 64 00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:14,760 And given that she's gone all out on the frock, lipstick, and pearls 65 00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:17,320 I'd bet that help was a gentleman caller. 66 00:05:21,880 --> 00:05:24,480 Whoever was here was certainly careful to tidy up. 67 00:05:25,320 --> 00:05:28,000 I'll say. Not a print in sight. 68 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:31,120 Powdery residue on the coffee table, though. 69 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,320 Some on the sofa, too. 70 00:05:38,280 --> 00:05:39,920 Tucked behind the bread bin. 71 00:05:42,520 --> 00:05:44,520 Someone should head down to the bugle. 72 00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:49,000 Hmm. And I suppose that someone ought to be you? 73 00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:03,200 I need to talk to you about your lonely hearts. 74 00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:04,360 Perfect timing! 75 00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:06,840 You could take advantage of our one—month—free offer. 76 00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:08,280 For an investigation. 77 00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:09,480 Obviously, I'd like to help 78 00:06:09,560 --> 00:06:12,160 but the persons behind our personals are confidential, Sam 79 00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:13,280 I'm sure you understand. 80 00:06:13,360 --> 00:06:16,440 Even if your personals are linked to a possible murder case? 81 00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:17,520 Keep talking. 82 00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:21,600 It's strictly on the ot that there was a woman found dead 83 00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:24,040 with a Jigsaw puzzle and a face full of cold cream. 84 00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:26,000 And you're suspicious because... 85 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:27,480 A hunch. 86 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:29,480 Do I get an exclusive? 87 00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:32,760 Once I know what we're dealing with and it's safe to go public. 88 00:06:32,840 --> 00:06:34,000 Is that a yes? 89 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:36,760 Sam chuckles it's not a no. 90 00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:38,920 Alright. Follow me. 91 00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:43,880 Colin: Sympson—smythe, sympson—smythe. 92 00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:46,920 Ah, here she is. — oh, Colin, you're a diamond. 93 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:50,160 "Busty divorcee, fifties, seeks energetic male, any age 94 00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:53,280 to share dinner, wine etcetera. Box 19". Hats off! 95 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:57,600 Fair to say hilary was one of our more enthusiastic customers. 96 00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:01,160 Well, let's hope it wasn't the "etcetera" that finished her off! 97 00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:03,440 So, talk me through the system. 98 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:09,200 Someone places an ad, for example, "lonely lady seeks tall handsome stranger". 99 00:07:09,280 --> 00:07:12,800 Or "frustrated bachelor seeks assertive successful woman". 100 00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:15,240 They're assigned a box number. 101 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:18,520 All correspondence is checked and forwarded every Thursday. 102 00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:22,640 How soon can you get the names and addresses of these men? 103 00:07:24,440 --> 00:07:30,160 He described him as smart, upright, grey—haired, and smoking a pipe. 104 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:34,720 Mr Arnold at the honeysuckle cottage saw him when he went out to retrieve a pigeon. 105 00:07:35,360 --> 00:07:36,520 A what? — a pigeon. 106 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:39,480 Never mind. You and Peggy need to start eliminating. 107 00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,240 There's 34 names on that list. 108 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,680 Right, I shall begin. 109 00:07:46,480 --> 00:07:48,600 As I suspected. 110 00:07:49,160 --> 00:07:51,360 Diethylbarbituric acid. Please don't touch. 111 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,200 Diethylbarbituric acid. 112 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:57,560 Barbital in powder form, brand name bentinal, prescribed for insomnia. 113 00:07:58,160 --> 00:07:59,520 Progress! Good man. 114 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:03,520 Oh, um, and if there was any doubt about whether her death was suspicious 115 00:08:03,600 --> 00:08:07,360 hilary sympson—smythe had enough in her system to fell a giraffe, so... 116 00:08:07,440 --> 00:08:08,720 Hmm. 117 00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:10,320 Right. 118 00:08:10,480 --> 00:08:12,520 You've certainly earned that snowball, sister. 119 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:15,760 Reckon I've earned myself one too, if you're buying. 120 00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:16,920 Evening, sister. 121 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,640 Hello, Ruth. — I thought you always bought your own? 122 00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:22,280 Sometimes a girl likes to leave her principles at the door, Sam 123 00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:23,360 you know that. 124 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,640 I'll do the honours, what'll it be? 125 00:08:27,720 --> 00:08:28,720 The usual, thanks. 126 00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:34,600 I knew there was something about your mystery that rang a bell. 127 00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:39,720 Alice croft, died at home, on may 9th, supposedly of natural causes. 128 00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:43,160 Oh, yes, mrs croft, the local councillor if memory serves? 129 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:45,080 Ruth: I interviewed her daughter for the obit. 130 00:08:45,160 --> 00:08:48,640 She said how tragic it was that mother didn't get to finish her new Jigsaw puzzle 131 00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:50,880 "the Madonna of the yarnwinder". 132 00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:52,600 Apparently, the family took great comfort 133 00:08:52,680 --> 00:08:56,000 from the fact that the holy mother was somehow "with her" when she passed. 134 00:08:56,560 --> 00:08:59,080 Interesting, but it's not necessarily a link. — Ruth: Agreed. 135 00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:02,000 Which is why I called and asked a couple more questions. 136 00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:05,840 It seems Alice croft was wearing cold cream when she was discovered. 137 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:06,920 Oh, gosh. 138 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:09,600 I don't suppose she was... — Ruth: A lonely heart? 139 00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:14,520 "Buxom from bath. Attractive mature widow, fit fifties 140 00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:18,320 seeks energetic male for frisky fun. Box 22." 141 00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:20,640 Sam, you need to let me go to press. — not yet. 142 00:09:20,720 --> 00:09:22,000 Why the hell not? 143 00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:24,000 Sorry, sister. — no, no, that's quite alright. 144 00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:25,120 Pretend I'm not here. 145 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:29,000 Going public will cause mass hysteria and scare the killer back into the woodwork. 146 00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:31,640 Then let's hope for your sake he doesn't strike again. 147 00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:35,800 I wouldn't want that on my conscience. 148 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:44,680 Strictly entre nous. 149 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:48,440 One gets tired of being in the same position, week in week out. 150 00:09:49,320 --> 00:09:53,720 I've you to thank for opening my eyes to new possibilities. 151 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:56,320 The pleasure was all mine, mrs clam. 152 00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:58,880 They both laugh — Sam clears his throat: Morning. 153 00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:01,680 I'll, um, freshen the teapot. 154 00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:05,640 Thought I would send wpc button out 155 00:10:05,720 --> 00:10:07,880 to check the sale ofjigsaw puzzles in the area. 156 00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:09,680 Right. Good. 157 00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:13,080 Anything else you want to tell me about? 158 00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:16,000 Presuming cyril isn't listening in from beyond the grave. 159 00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:23,000 Mrs clam: There you are. 160 00:10:25,960 --> 00:10:28,720 Sergeant livingstone needs his strength building up. 161 00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:31,800 I'm not sure I want to know what for. 162 00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:35,280 You're honestly not insinuating... — what? 163 00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:40,280 I have joined mrs clam and the bell—ringers of st Michael's church. 164 00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:41,760 Oh, praise be. 165 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:43,240 He chuckles why didn't you tell me? 166 00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:45,240 And have you make a mockery of me? 167 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:46,320 Would I? 168 00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:48,640 I think it's great. 169 00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:52,520 So, if I join the bell—ringers, would I get sausages too? 170 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:53,800 Have mine. 171 00:10:53,880 --> 00:10:56,200 The British banger is a taste I have yet to acquire. 172 00:10:56,280 --> 00:10:57,280 Sam scoffs 173 00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:05,480 Watch out. Now mrs c knows you're a joiner—inner 174 00:11:05,560 --> 00:11:07,600 she'll be trying to join you up to the g—sads. 175 00:11:07,680 --> 00:11:08,520 The g what? 176 00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:11,120 The great slaughter amateur dramatics society. 177 00:11:16,440 --> 00:11:18,480 Sorry, line? 178 00:11:19,840 --> 00:11:21,480 Wait... got it! 179 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:26,680 It's true, you love me, with every step of the waltz. 180 00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:29,880 The merry widow was last year, dottie. 181 00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:33,000 Let's take five to revisit the script, shall we? 182 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:39,560 And try to not just say the lines but feel them in our core. 183 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:42,000 Rudolpho? 184 00:11:45,640 --> 00:11:50,560 My core feels there's some impropriety going on. 185 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:55,920 Honestly, I don't see why we can't do a bit of Gilbert and Sullivan 186 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,320 or Noel coward if one insists on being "modern". 187 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:04,760 Hello. New blood? 188 00:12:04,840 --> 00:12:06,560 Certainly not. 189 00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:08,320 Sam: Looking for Colin, if he's around? 190 00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:10,600 I know exactly where he is. 191 00:12:10,680 --> 00:12:14,480 He's either in the lav or adjusting the lights or... 192 00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:16,600 Sorry, who were you looking for? 193 00:12:16,680 --> 00:12:18,640 Morning, officers. Everything alright? 194 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,320 Sam: Just a quick word please. — of course. 195 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,480 Ida: Don't keep him too long. 196 00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:28,160 Chaos descends if dottie doesn't have a prompt. 197 00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:32,720 Again, from page 66, please, g—sads! 198 00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:36,280 Sorry to interrupt whatever this is. 199 00:12:36,360 --> 00:12:39,240 Ah. Dostoevsky. Crime and punishment. 200 00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:41,600 Mother's quite ambitious. 201 00:12:41,680 --> 00:12:43,760 The cast have been great sports about it so far 202 00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:47,360 although she hasn't told them about the unitards yet. 203 00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:52,320 We just wanted to check something with you. 204 00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:03,640 Confounded white residue. From the coffee table. 205 00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:05,440 Subjected it to every test in christendom 206 00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:09,240 yet it stubbornly refuses to be any familiar chemical compound. 207 00:13:10,280 --> 00:13:12,760 This test is my last hurrah. 208 00:13:16,080 --> 00:13:17,080 Fingers crossed. 209 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,360 Oh! That is unexpected. 210 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:31,160 What am I seeing? 211 00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,080 Plain as a pikestaff. 212 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:36,200 Polyhedral granules, central hilum a five—rayed cleft. 213 00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:39,160 Cornflour! 214 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:40,800 Of course, what was I thinking? 215 00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:44,360 So, why is it scattered all over our crime scene? 216 00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:47,200 Thickening the plot, perhaps? — they chuckle 217 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:52,240 any insights into the world of lonely hearts? 218 00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:57,640 Well, thanks to Colin we now know Alice and hilary both dated two of the same men. 219 00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:02,760 Yes. Box 22, major Roger Travis 220 00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:06,000 aka the "major heart—sing." 221 00:14:08,720 --> 00:14:12,360 And box 30, retired chemist professor... 222 00:14:13,840 --> 00:14:17,720 Claude. — Claude several, aka "bunsen burner." 223 00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:18,960 Ouch! 224 00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:22,520 A man after my own heart. Interest purely professional, of course. 225 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:24,440 Good old Colin. 226 00:14:25,720 --> 00:14:28,640 Yeah. Good old Colin. — yeah... yeah. 227 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:32,000 Ah. The pensive pause. 228 00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:36,720 Something a bit obsessive about him, don't you think? 229 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:39,280 With the pocket squares and the pernickety systems. 230 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:43,960 Does rather depend on one's own benchmark in regard to efficiency and grooming. 231 00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:49,520 I suppose he does have a connection to both women. 232 00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:51,160 Exactly. 233 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:53,680 Time to make some house calls. 234 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,120 Professor several: I only met each lady the once 235 00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,000 and they were but two of many. 236 00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:04,280 So, you consider women interchangeable, is that it, professor? 237 00:15:05,200 --> 00:15:08,640 Actually, I'm a sufferer of prosopagnosia. 238 00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:14,680 A condition that renders one—— — Unable to recognise faces, even one's own. 239 00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:16,480 Professor several: Very good, sergeant. 240 00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:18,480 So, I differentiate women by smell. 241 00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:20,160 Smell? 242 00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:22,600 I can detect different blood types, in fact. 243 00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:25,720 Hilary was b—positive. 244 00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:27,840 Quite a rare one, that. 245 00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:29,600 He sniffs 246 00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:31,640 he exhales deeply 247 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:34,000 o—negative. 248 00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:37,360 We think the perpetrator may have had pharmacological knowledge. 249 00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:40,680 If you're suggesting I use my expertise to drug women... 250 00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:44,480 I can assure you I've no need of chemical intervention. 251 00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:46,200 Of any kind. 252 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:48,480 Where were you the night before last, professor? 253 00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:51,200 A partial eclipse, if I'm not mistaken. 254 00:15:52,720 --> 00:15:55,480 Are you given to lunar distractions, inspector? 255 00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:56,560 No. 256 00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:59,320 And yet, even rational men such as ourselves 257 00:15:59,840 --> 00:16:03,880 can't help but feel the eternal tango of the cosmos. 258 00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:06,840 Where were you the night of June 13th, professor? 259 00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:12,000 I was at a fundraising dinner for cripples in mombasa. 260 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:15,440 I'm a passionate and vigorous campaigner. 261 00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:16,600 And you can prove that? 262 00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:19,080 My passion and vigour? 263 00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:22,160 No. Your whereabouts, professor. 264 00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:23,920 No. 265 00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:27,600 But I have every confidence that you can. 266 00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:42,240 Felix: You're sure he'll be here? 267 00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:44,760 Half a pint of stout at 5.45. 268 00:16:44,840 --> 00:16:47,000 Word is you can set your watch by major Travis. 269 00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:52,960 Sam clears his throat major Travis? 270 00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:56,120 Yes? — sorry to bother you. 271 00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:58,480 We are investigating an incident, night before last. 272 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:01,680 Must be serious 273 00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:05,600 if you're inconveniencing law—abiding citizens on a Saturday? 274 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:07,560 Indeed. Just a couple of questions 275 00:17:07,640 --> 00:17:09,560 then we'll let you get back to your racing pages. 276 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:14,480 Fire away then, detective inspector Gillespie. 277 00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:18,320 Where were you the evening of June 13th? 278 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:22,760 I was here until 6.30 sharp, then I walked home. 279 00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:25,680 Straight home? Any stops? Deviations? 280 00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:29,280 I may have taken the scenic route, via the lake. 281 00:17:29,360 --> 00:17:32,000 Did you see or speak to anyone that could verify that? 282 00:17:32,440 --> 00:17:33,560 No. 283 00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:37,840 My shrapnel injury was causing discomfort, so I turned in early. 284 00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:40,480 And yet, you may have taken a scenic route as a detour? 285 00:17:41,280 --> 00:17:42,560 I don't recall. 286 00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:44,920 That's the trouble with war wounds. 287 00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:48,680 They tend to manifest without warning at inconvenient moments. 288 00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:50,960 Sam: Well, excuse the "inconvenience", major. 289 00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:54,160 We'll be in touch if there's anything further. 290 00:17:58,360 --> 00:18:01,800 Obviously, I would take on a male role 291 00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:04,840 but the beard glue brings me out in a rash. — gate clangs 292 00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:07,400 ooh. That was the front gate. 293 00:18:08,080 --> 00:18:09,920 Mrs clam, got to go. 294 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,360 See you and dottie for the read—through in the morning. 295 00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:19,160 Lois: Comely wa/if/o wer, 52, hoping to bloom. 296 00:18:19,240 --> 00:18:21,040 Better late than never. 297 00:18:21,120 --> 00:18:23,400 Are you my sunshine? 298 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:26,000 Wi/I respond to all. 299 00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:29,440 Doorbell rings — box 37. 300 00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:48,440 Morning! Queen of the kitchen, as promised. 301 00:18:49,120 --> 00:18:51,040 Don't tell the vicar but it's my new Bible. 302 00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:55,200 Once you've served coleslaw in a wine glass, there's no going back. 303 00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:59,560 Ooh, I love a buff orpington. 304 00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:01,520 Morning, thespians. 305 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:03,680 Right. I've colour—coded everyone's parts. 306 00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:08,000 I'm green. Dottie, you're pink. Lois, you're blue. 307 00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:10,480 Lois. 308 00:19:11,840 --> 00:19:14,000 You're blue. — I'm pink. 309 00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:15,920 Blue... 310 00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:18,400 Oh dear! 311 00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:20,760 Lois? You're... 312 00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:25,000 Woman screams 313 00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:32,600 what kind of miscreant could do such a thing? 314 00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:36,120 You've had a terrible shock. 315 00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:37,200 She sobs 316 00:19:37,240 --> 00:19:39,440 I'll take you home for a cup of tea, mrs clam. 317 00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:41,000 Or something stronger. 318 00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:50,440 Any thoughts to the time of death, sister? 319 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:53,920 Well, um, I'd estimate between 8 and 11 in the pm. 320 00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:56,400 No one could have seen this coming. 321 00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:57,720 And yet the same mo. 322 00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:01,760 The cold cream, the cornflour, the missing Jigsaw piece. Why? 323 00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:03,480 Hmm. 324 00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:08,000 Well, my guess is the cold cream is to render the victim faceless, anonymous. 325 00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:11,320 Unable to judge his actions. 326 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:14,040 Certainly, a troubled psyche at work. 327 00:20:14,120 --> 00:20:15,440 To hell with his psyche. 328 00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:17,360 He's a sick opportunist 329 00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:20,840 using the lonely hearts to prey on unsuspecting victims. 330 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:23,560 Yes, well, we still need to understand the motivation. 331 00:20:24,120 --> 00:20:25,360 It's not sexual, but... 332 00:20:26,360 --> 00:20:28,640 He obviously likes to spend time with his victims. 333 00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:32,640 I don't need to understand him, I just need to catch him. 334 00:20:33,080 --> 00:20:34,600 He sighs I need some air. 335 00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:48,800 Sam: Sister? 336 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,000 Yes. 337 00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:53,760 Sam: Sister? 338 00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:01,640 Look. 339 00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:09,080 I'd say someone took off their muddy shoes before entering the house. 340 00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:13,000 Must have dropped it out of the tread. 341 00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,000 A stout walking shoe, I'd wager. 342 00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,320 How do we know it belonged to the murderer? 343 00:21:23,120 --> 00:21:25,856 Well, given that it rained yesterday evening for the first time in weeks 344 00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:28,616 and that Lois isn't the kind of housekeeper to allow any speck to go un—scrubbed 345 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:29,800 I'd say extremely sure. 346 00:21:39,480 --> 00:21:42,240 What is that? Some type of grass? 347 00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:45,320 Barley, by the looks. 348 00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:53,320 It won't tell us who our killer is, but it'll certainly tell us where he's been. 349 00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:58,440 He was lying, professor several. 350 00:21:58,520 --> 00:22:00,400 Our bunsen burner? 351 00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:01,520 Felix: That charity event? 352 00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:04,680 Two eyewitnesses saw him leave straight after the canapés. 353 00:22:05,080 --> 00:22:06,360 And the night that Alice died? 354 00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:11,800 Claims he was at some silent retreat in... lord pasternack's folly. Alone. 355 00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:13,160 Hardly watertight. 356 00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:15,880 I think we should pay the professor a visit. 357 00:22:16,360 --> 00:22:19,000 Sure I can't tempt you to a bloody Mary? 358 00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:21,760 Or a virgin, if you prefer? 359 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:23,120 Thank you, no. 360 00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:25,520 Where were you last night, professor? 361 00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:28,000 Tucked up in bed with odette and Pamela. 362 00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:30,440 My cats. 363 00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:33,880 Reciting plutarch together. Siamese are very vocal, you know. 364 00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:35,800 This fundraiser on June 13th. 365 00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:38,400 You were seen leaving early. 366 00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:44,000 It's time for some unembroidered facts, professor. 367 00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:49,480 It, it's true. I am dishonest. 368 00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:53,600 And weak. A slave to temptation. 369 00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:55,840 I was not alone. 370 00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:58,840 The charity treasurer and I went to the little grange hotel. 371 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:01,040 Why did you lie? 372 00:23:01,640 --> 00:23:04,320 Because the lady in question is a local magistrate. 373 00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:07,240 Wouldn't do for her reputation to be sullied. 374 00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:09,720 Sam: Three women have been killed, professor. 375 00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:13,080 Your lady friend's reputation is the least of my worries. 376 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:16,400 It's true. 377 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:19,800 The receptionist signed him in, and checked him out the next morning 378 00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:22,440 and delivered, at various intervals, a bottle of absinthe 379 00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:26,720 two hairnets, and a plate of Welsh rarebit. 380 00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:28,280 No accounting for taste. 381 00:23:28,360 --> 00:23:29,360 Indeed not. 382 00:23:29,440 --> 00:23:32,720 As for Colin, he left a rehearsal at 6.45 383 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:34,920 took the train to bunnington 384 00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:39,120 and alighted at little sockford for a harpsichord recital. 385 00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:41,960 Anyone see him? — the conductor clipped his ticket. 386 00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:44,400 He returned home at 22h00 387 00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:48,320 bidding goodnight to the scoutmaster before heading up the front path. 388 00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:51,640 And I bet he could tell us the colour of the scoutmaster's shoelaces. 389 00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:53,120 Felix: I daresay. 390 00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:54,280 Sam sighs 391 00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:56,640 which leaves the major. 392 00:23:57,560 --> 00:23:59,320 Any progress on that footprint? 393 00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:01,000 Matter of fact, yes. 394 00:24:03,360 --> 00:24:07,720 So, the large structures are tree seeds, some sort of conifer. 395 00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:10,240 Combined with the barley fragments and fungal spores 396 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:14,440 we're looking at a specific time and place. A pedological photograph, if you will. 397 00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:16,000 A photograph of what? 398 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:18,536 Well, we'd have to sample mud from barley fields in the area 399 00:24:18,560 --> 00:24:20,880 but if we can locate the same profile... 400 00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:22,360 We'll know who the killer is. 401 00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:26,000 Let's go and see if the major's got any mud on his shoes. 402 00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:31,440 "Honest, loyal, ex—army gentleman of means 403 00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:36,000 seeks warm—hearted lady for companionship and home fires". 404 00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:40,160 A lady like Alice croft. 405 00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:42,720 Or hilary sympson—smythe. 406 00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:43,920 Or Lois Mason. 407 00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:47,960 For the umpteenth time, I have never met these women. 408 00:24:49,120 --> 00:24:51,200 Mud was found in Lois Mason's porch. 409 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:55,240 The remnants perfectly match the tread of your shoes. 410 00:24:55,440 --> 00:24:59,160 As they no doubt would the shoes of everyone else 411 00:24:59,240 --> 00:25:02,000 who owns the same ubiquitous brand. 412 00:25:03,280 --> 00:25:06,400 Awfully clean, aren't they, given that you live in a rural area? 413 00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:07,840 He scoffs well... 414 00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:11,280 You can take the man out of the army... 415 00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:17,240 Seems you've discovered my footwear is as clean as my conscience 416 00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:19,880 so you're clutching at straws, inspector. 417 00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:22,080 Sam sighs heavily 418 00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:27,280 you visited gravestock's newsagents two days before hilary was murdered. 419 00:25:27,360 --> 00:25:28,360 What did you buy? 420 00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:32,400 I believe it was a Jigsaw puzzle. 421 00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:34,920 A Jigsaw of what? — major Travis: No idea. 422 00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:37,720 One with a picture on it. 423 00:25:37,800 --> 00:25:38,800 Who for? 424 00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:40,600 My aunt Edith. 425 00:25:41,680 --> 00:25:42,960 And if you'd done your job 426 00:25:43,040 --> 00:25:46,160 you would have found out that I also bought a birthday card 427 00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:50,000 and some parcel string in order to post it to her for her birthday. 428 00:25:51,360 --> 00:25:52,880 As I do every year. 429 00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:55,760 What's with the Jigsaw puzzle fixation, major? 430 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:57,640 Come now, inspector. 431 00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:02,000 Once a lady's fertile and attractive years are behind her 432 00:26:02,480 --> 00:26:04,120 what else is there for her to do? 433 00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:10,520 Now, unless you've some actual evidence, inspector Gillespie 434 00:26:11,120 --> 00:26:13,400 I shall take myself home for supper. 435 00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:16,000 He sighs good day. 436 00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:19,880 Sam sighs 437 00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:20,960 door slams 438 00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:23,440 I had to just watch him walk out. 439 00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:27,000 It's unconscionable, I know, but we simply have no proof. 440 00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:31,120 Apologies, mrs clam, lost our appetites somewhat. 441 00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:33,400 No, I must apologise. 442 00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:37,160 I seem to be ruining breakfast, lunch, and dinner ever since... 443 00:26:37,840 --> 00:26:39,920 Don't worry, mrs c, no one's noticed. 444 00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:44,080 Awful to think that Lois opened her heart to that man 445 00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:46,640 only to fall into his terrible trap. 446 00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:50,600 Wait... that's it. A trap. 447 00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:53,560 We send the major an invitation from a fake admirer 448 00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:56,640 we wait for him to crack out the bentinal, and then we catch him in the act. 449 00:26:56,680 --> 00:27:00,000 With respect, not only are those ethics somewhat dubious... 450 00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:01,080 Sod the ethics. 451 00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:02,496 But what woman in her right mind 452 00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:04,880 would submit herself to such a dangerous endeavour? 453 00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:06,960 I shall do it. 454 00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:08,440 Mrs clam, no. 455 00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:10,120 Nonsense, I insist. 456 00:27:10,200 --> 00:27:13,040 If I can prevent another lone woman from being murdered, then—... 457 00:27:13,120 --> 00:27:15,000 That's absolutely courageous of you 458 00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:18,000 but it would be risky and dangerous—— — you're on. 459 00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:20,480 Good. I shall see to the custard. 460 00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:24,640 She's perfect. 461 00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:26,960 Are the great slaughter police really so under—resourced 462 00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:30,000 that we would use a civilian in a honey trap operation? 463 00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:31,920 Sam chuckles 464 00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:33,200 you said "we". 465 00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:36,000 What? — seems you're one of us now. 466 00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:45,520 So, what do we think? 467 00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:50,000 There must be something here between "milkmaid" and "Moulin Rouge". 468 00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:51,680 I should jolly well hope so. 469 00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:53,680 Right. 470 00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:57,120 Let's cook the major up an invitation he can't refuse. 471 00:27:57,720 --> 00:28:01,360 She clears her throat so, how would you describe yourself, Vera? 472 00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:04,960 Tidy, church—going, spinster. 473 00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:09,040 Put "trim, ballroom—dancing, bon viveur". 474 00:28:09,680 --> 00:28:10,960 Sister boniface: Oh, very good. 475 00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:12,640 The voice of an expert. She chuckles 476 00:28:12,720 --> 00:28:14,280 don't, don't forget, he has a type. 477 00:28:14,360 --> 00:28:18,600 Put "curvaceous and homely, likes hugging and baking". 478 00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:20,080 Dreadful. — perfect. 479 00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:23,240 Colin: I had my suspicions about that major. 480 00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:26,360 Do you know, he gets more letters than any other lonely heart 481 00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:29,360 even "strong, good with livestock", and "tap—dancing Romeo"? 482 00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:33,040 Focus, Colin, that Marcel isn't going to wave itself. 483 00:28:33,120 --> 00:28:34,120 Sorry, mother. 484 00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:37,560 Ready when you are. 485 00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:41,840 Think this'll work? — sister boniface: What's your worry? 486 00:28:41,920 --> 00:28:46,080 Well, just that a honey trap requires, well, you know, honey? 487 00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:52,000 Colin: Ready? 488 00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:00,000 She wolf—whistles 489 00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:03,760 hell's bells, mrs c! Where've you been hiding that figure? 490 00:29:03,840 --> 00:29:06,760 I'll thank you to rein in the profanity, ms penny. 491 00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:08,320 Roger that. 492 00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:11,960 Tempted to say that what you've both achieved 493 00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:14,120 leaves the loaves and fishes somewhat in the shade. 494 00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:17,600 We make a great team, don't we, Colin? 495 00:29:18,080 --> 00:29:19,080 The best. 496 00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:24,280 M rs c I am: ”dear major heart—sing 497 00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:26,320 that's it, mrs c, really work it! 498 00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:28,400 Mrs clam: I noticed your advertisement... 499 00:29:29,040 --> 00:29:30,040 Ruth: Blow us a kiss! 500 00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:32,240 Mrs clam: And wish to invite you for supper. 501 00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:35,360 Though somewhat beyond the first flush of youth 502 00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:38,400 I'm told /sti/I have a certain twinkle in my eye... ” 503 00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:42,440 Major Travis: Dear Vera. 504 00:29:43,280 --> 00:29:47,240 I hope you won't think me forward in calling you by your Christian name? 505 00:29:48,120 --> 00:29:53,400 So enchanted was lby your letter that / feel we are already friends. 506 00:29:54,360 --> 00:29:55,520 Needless to say 507 00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:59,000 I should be delighted to accept your invitation. 508 00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:08,440 Bear in mind that barbital has no antidote, lethal dose is a mere 55 grains. 509 00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:10,240 Do not drink the Sherry. 510 00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:13,200 Otherwise, we shall have to do you the dubious honour of gastric lavage. 511 00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:18,520 How about a roleplay? Shall we, roleplay? 512 00:30:19,120 --> 00:30:21,000 She clears her throat: So, um, I'll be major. 513 00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:24,920 Um, imagine that the date is going swimmingly 514 00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:27,480 and I'm about to strike. 515 00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:31,480 Ooh. 516 00:30:32,360 --> 00:30:33,680 Sister boniface clears her throat 517 00:30:33,760 --> 00:30:36,600 she mimics the major: Er, splendid vol—au—vents, Vera. 518 00:30:37,720 --> 00:30:39,560 Do have another, major. 519 00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:42,000 Oh. Don't mind if I do. 520 00:30:42,960 --> 00:30:44,000 Mmm. 521 00:30:45,160 --> 00:30:47,320 Time for a top—up, wouldn't you say? 522 00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:51,160 Now, you'll need a reason to excuse yourself for a moment. 523 00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:53,240 I think I need a lie down. 524 00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:55,200 Well, don't come on too strong. 525 00:30:55,280 --> 00:30:57,360 No, I think I really do need a lie down. 526 00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:03,080 Might I suggest that if things get too much 527 00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:07,520 mrs clam could utter a safe word and then we will intervene. 528 00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:10,800 Yes. Good idea. I like the word "somnambulant". 529 00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:14,480 Or "owls". — a word that's germane to the scenario. 530 00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:16,080 Well, can't I just say "help"? 531 00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:18,360 "Macaroni", the safe word is macaroni. 532 00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:20,000 Macaroni. 533 00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:21,800 Macaroni... 534 00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:24,240 Doorbell rings — mrs clam yelps 535 00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:28,400 courage, Vera, that's just Peggy, we've some digging to do. 536 00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:30,840 Godspeed, all. 537 00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:34,080 Macaroni... macaroni. 538 00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:51,600 Chin up, old thing, only nine more to go! 539 00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:54,160 Nine fields and only one of you, sister. 540 00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:57,680 Yes, I do sometimes think an extra one or two would help. 541 00:31:58,600 --> 00:32:00,200 One of me could do the carrying. 542 00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:02,240 Another could do the map—reading. 543 00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:04,360 I can do the measuring. 544 00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:06,000 I shall be in charge of digging! 545 00:32:06,880 --> 00:32:08,080 I'll gather samples. 546 00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:11,000 Ooh, put me down for tea and tiffin! 547 00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:12,640 You alright, sister? 548 00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:19,360 Yes! I suppose it has been a long day. 549 00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:23,800 Perhaps it's time for a slice of battenberg? — now you're talking. 550 00:32:33,240 --> 00:32:34,520 Doorbell rings 551 00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:40,600 Vera. 552 00:32:40,680 --> 00:32:41,680 Major. 553 00:32:42,760 --> 00:32:45,040 You're even prettier in person. 554 00:32:45,120 --> 00:32:47,000 She scoffs nonsense. 555 00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:52,280 He clears his throat 556 00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:55,840 may I? 557 00:32:56,240 --> 00:33:00,200 Um... yes, certainly. Ah, do come in. 558 00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:10,360 Major Travis: Of course, they prefer to be shown no mercy. 559 00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:12,680 I cut their heads off 560 00:33:13,240 --> 00:33:14,440 Bury them in my cellar 561 00:33:14,760 --> 00:33:16,560 then dig them up when the time is right. 562 00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:19,400 What? — the tubers. 563 00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:24,320 The dahlias. I grew them myself, something of a hobby. 564 00:33:27,280 --> 00:33:29,560 Tell me about your interests. 565 00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:33,840 I imagine your foxtrot is quite something from the looks of you. 566 00:33:33,920 --> 00:33:36,760 My foxtrot is strictly off—limits! 567 00:33:37,360 --> 00:33:41,000 Erm... sciatica. — ah, my sympathy. 568 00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:45,200 I fear my dancing days are also behind me. 569 00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:46,480 But... 570 00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:50,240 Still plenty of lead in my pencil, so to speak. 571 00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:53,280 Mrs clam chuckles nervously 572 00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:58,520 I shall just, um, pop on some mantovani 573 00:33:58,600 --> 00:34:00,000 and then go and warm the oven. 574 00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:06,560 That one's number 17. 575 00:34:09,520 --> 00:34:15,160 Yes. Some intriguing nematodes, but not what we're looking for. 576 00:34:16,320 --> 00:34:17,840 Ok. Next? 577 00:34:18,120 --> 00:34:19,120 Number nine. 578 00:34:20,080 --> 00:34:22,841 Bit like a very boring game of bingo. — sister boniface chuckles: Yes. 579 00:34:32,880 --> 00:34:35,120 Oh! Bingo, Peggy, my girl! 580 00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:38,000 Number nine? That's crooked mile field. 581 00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:40,720 So, it is. Yes. Um... 582 00:34:50,480 --> 00:34:51,760 Oh my. 583 00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:54,016 Didn't leave your wellies in the rain again, did you, sister? 584 00:34:54,040 --> 00:34:55,280 Sister boniface: No, Peggy. 585 00:34:55,360 --> 00:34:57,800 I fear a far greater oversight has occurred. 586 00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:09,360 Aren't we supposed to go in? 587 00:35:11,120 --> 00:35:12,680 We need to let it play out. 588 00:35:13,240 --> 00:35:14,240 Abort! 589 00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:16,320 Abort! Abort! — really? 590 00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:17,400 Abort! 591 00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:19,720 Abort! Abort! 592 00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:23,520 Sam: We're in the middle of a—— — the killer isn't major Travis! 593 00:35:24,120 --> 00:35:26,600 What? — or rather, it is major Travis 594 00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:27,880 just not that one. 595 00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:30,560 Mmm. He chuckles —oh! 596 00:35:30,640 --> 00:35:33,120 Oh gosh, you weren't wrong. You certainly are nimble. 597 00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:34,560 Macaroni. 598 00:35:35,520 --> 00:35:38,200 Macaroni! — I think dinner can wait, don't you? 599 00:35:38,280 --> 00:35:39,280 Mrs clam yelps 600 00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:43,960 you may consider me easy pickings, major 601 00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:47,640 but you will not indulge your hideous perversions in my parlour. 602 00:35:48,040 --> 00:35:49,320 Excuse me? — mrs clam: Yes! 603 00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:54,000 I belong to a generation of unwed women who've been put out to grass 604 00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:58,640 but we shall not be silenced, and we shall certainly not be murdered! 605 00:35:59,120 --> 00:36:00,120 He cries out 606 00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:03,280 Felix: Mrs clam! 607 00:36:06,680 --> 00:36:08,520 Yes, let's... let's find you a towel. 608 00:36:11,440 --> 00:36:13,480 So, this is the field that the mud's from? 609 00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:15,200 Mm—hmm. Crooked mile field. 610 00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:17,800 And the railway line cuts right through the middle. 611 00:36:18,200 --> 00:36:21,320 So, he makes sure that the conductor stamps his ticket 612 00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:24,000 and then he gets off the train a stop early. 613 00:36:24,240 --> 00:36:26,840 And then headed back to Lois's across country. 614 00:36:27,560 --> 00:36:30,480 But I simply can't see how Colin's been passing himself off 615 00:36:30,560 --> 00:36:31,560 as major Travis? 616 00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:34,440 Not to mention he's 20 years too young. 617 00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:36,000 Colin! 618 00:36:37,720 --> 00:36:40,560 You mean "hair and makeup" Colin? 619 00:36:41,120 --> 00:36:44,120 The architect of my lonely hearts persona? 620 00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:46,400 Let's make some tea, shall we? 621 00:36:46,480 --> 00:36:49,400 Mrs clam: Ooh. Tea, yes, of course. 622 00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:51,800 Oh, of course! 623 00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:55,080 The cornflour, to whiten the hair! 624 00:36:55,160 --> 00:36:56,400 Yes! 625 00:36:57,720 --> 00:37:00,320 I expect Colin's been studying the major for some time 626 00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:02,400 learning his mannerisms and whatnot. 627 00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:04,440 Quite the performance. 628 00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:05,520 A tragedy at that. 629 00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:07,520 Time for his curtain call. 630 00:37:07,600 --> 00:37:09,320 Oh! She giggles 631 00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:14,560 telephone rings 632 00:37:22,280 --> 00:37:23,320 Yes? 633 00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:25,520 Well, he's not at his desk. 634 00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:28,160 She sighs fine, give me a sec. 635 00:37:29,480 --> 00:37:32,160 Proofs... proofs... 636 00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:45,720 Colin: Panic over. 637 00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:48,560 Paper's been put to bed safe and sound. — splendid. 638 00:37:49,320 --> 00:37:50,320 Everything alright? 639 00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:51,640 Never better. 640 00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:05,640 Ida laughs 641 00:38:05,720 --> 00:38:08,720 ida: You'll have to catch me first! — knock on door 642 00:38:09,600 --> 00:38:12,880 oh, get lost, Colin! It's not even nine o'clock. 643 00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:15,200 Mrs sweet? It's inspector Gillespie. 644 00:38:19,240 --> 00:38:21,400 Uh, is Colin not at home? 645 00:38:21,760 --> 00:38:23,040 No, I told him... 646 00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:26,000 Asked him, to stay out. 647 00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:32,360 One—to—one rehearsal. 648 00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:35,760 It's a very... challenging scene. 649 00:38:35,840 --> 00:38:37,720 Do you have any idea where Colin is? 650 00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:39,560 No. 651 00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:40,760 Sam sighs 652 00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:54,600 Looking for these? 653 00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:58,520 I believe you have something of mine. 654 00:38:59,480 --> 00:39:01,000 Perhaps we could do an exchange. 655 00:39:02,240 --> 00:39:03,360 And what if I say no? 656 00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:06,816 Are you going to do to me what you did to those other women? 657 00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:08,120 Colin chuckles: Oh, heavens, no! 658 00:39:08,200 --> 00:39:09,720 You're not at all the major's type. 659 00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:14,880 Ruth cries out 660 00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:17,040 you're nothing but a coward. 661 00:39:17,120 --> 00:39:19,400 Ruth grunts 662 00:39:20,160 --> 00:39:21,200 Colin, please... 663 00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:25,480 Sam: Ruth! Stop! 664 00:39:25,560 --> 00:39:27,920 Ruth gasps for breath — men grunt 665 00:39:29,360 --> 00:39:30,760 show's over, Colin. 666 00:39:31,520 --> 00:39:32,520 Colin: Get off me! 667 00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:35,000 Take him away. 668 00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:35,920 Ruth pants 669 00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:38,840 Felix: You are not obliged to say anything unless you wish to do so. 670 00:39:38,920 --> 00:39:41,400 But what you do say may... — slow, gentle breaths, old thing. 671 00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:43,520 Sam pants: Ruth... 672 00:39:44,920 --> 00:39:46,080 She pants: I'm fine. 673 00:39:46,160 --> 00:39:48,080 Nothing worse than a broken fingernail. 674 00:39:48,960 --> 00:39:51,000 I'm so sorry I let that happen to you. 675 00:39:51,560 --> 00:39:54,560 Ruth pants 676 00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:57,760 so, rudolpho came on the scene... 677 00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:01,120 And you were jealous. Angry. 678 00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:03,560 You felt replaced. Betrayed. 679 00:40:03,880 --> 00:40:05,720 He hasn't even learned his lines. 680 00:40:07,160 --> 00:40:08,720 Where did you get the bentinal from? 681 00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:09,840 Colin: Mother had a stash. 682 00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:14,560 I remember watching her take it at bedtime, always the same teacup. 683 00:40:15,640 --> 00:40:18,000 The... the Lily scent of the cold cream. 684 00:40:19,240 --> 00:40:22,920 The bliss on her face as she drifted into oblivion. 685 00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:25,920 So, the cold cream wasn't about making your victims anonymous 686 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:27,600 it was about turning them into ida? 687 00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:32,000 A version of ida that you could control. Like she controlled you. 688 00:40:32,440 --> 00:40:33,760 Mother never forgave me. 689 00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:36,520 For what? — she had ambitions. 690 00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:38,520 Shaftesbury Avenue, Broadway. 691 00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:42,360 But father ran off and she had to ditch it all to look after me. 692 00:40:43,720 --> 00:40:44,760 Times were tough. 693 00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:51,320 She was good at spotting talent and my talent was Jigsaw puzzles. 694 00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:56,240 She'd started drinking heavily, the prize money was a lifeline. 695 00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:59,640 Second place means you lost! 696 00:41:12,160 --> 00:41:14,280 Timer rings 697 00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:18,520 let's not let nerves get the better of us again, shall we? 698 00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:46,360 It's a sad story, but people have worse mothers than yours. 699 00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:49,160 You don't see them plying women with barbiturates 700 00:41:49,240 --> 00:41:50,600 and watching them die. 701 00:41:50,680 --> 00:41:53,120 But, you know, I'd never hurt mother. 702 00:41:54,280 --> 00:41:55,480 I love her. 703 00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:59,520 In spite of how she's been carrying on. Honestly, it's unseemly. 704 00:41:59,600 --> 00:42:00,920 "Unseemly"? 705 00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:02,320 Three women are dead. 706 00:42:03,320 --> 00:42:04,320 Ooh, dear. 707 00:42:06,200 --> 00:42:08,000 You're, you're hurting. 708 00:42:09,080 --> 00:42:10,400 You feel you failed. 709 00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:13,760 We've so much in common. 710 00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:15,280 No, we're done. 711 00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:17,800 And you're in jail. 712 00:42:18,840 --> 00:42:20,320 Hopefully, for the rest of your life. 713 00:42:20,400 --> 00:42:22,680 Colin laughs 714 00:42:22,760 --> 00:42:24,280 I don't fear incarceration. 715 00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:28,720 After all, a lock is just another puzzle. 716 00:42:29,600 --> 00:42:31,920 Put the pieces in the correct order and it's... 717 00:42:33,120 --> 00:42:34,280 Open sesame. 718 00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:47,560 Ready? 719 00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:53,000 Not bad news, I hope? 720 00:42:54,360 --> 00:42:55,720 It's from the major. 721 00:42:55,800 --> 00:42:58,360 Oh dear. Dry cleaning bill? 722 00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:01,400 May I? 723 00:43:05,120 --> 00:43:06,320 "Dear Vera. 724 00:43:06,400 --> 00:43:09,440 So taken was I by your pluck and fortitude 725 00:43:09,920 --> 00:43:13,000 not to mention your delightful hors d'oeuvres 726 00:43:13,080 --> 00:43:14,720 that I would wish to see..." 727 00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:19,240 "See you again". 728 00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:22,680 There's only one man that I want to see again. 729 00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:29,000 Today would have been cyril's 70th birthday. 730 00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:34,680 I expected to be surrounded by children and grandchildren by now. 731 00:43:36,320 --> 00:43:37,560 He was a brave man. 732 00:43:39,320 --> 00:43:40,320 The bravest. 733 00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:42,480 And the best. 734 00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:45,560 He would have been proud of you. 735 00:43:47,520 --> 00:43:49,280 Mrs clam sniffles 736 00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:52,480 come along, those bells aren't going to ring themselves.