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Babe, we're just talking.
I'm calling the police.
Just stay quiet, get behind me.
Buenos días, Matteo.
Buenos días, Abuelo.
I didn't think you'd be back so soon.
On my age, time is not something you take for granted.
You have an answer for me?
Your offer is very generous señor.
But I cannot accept.
Our family has worked this land for generations.
It's all we have.
But that's worth a lot more than money.
Family, pride, history.
I can respect all those things.
Of course.
But you misunderstand one thing.
This wasn't a negotiation.
No!
No, no, no, no, no!
No!
Matteo!
Look at me cabrón.
I want my face to be the last thing you see.
No, no!
I have a new offer.
Much simpler.
Turn over your ranch or uh...
this.
My men will be back at dawn for your answer.
Your choice.
Adiós señorita.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
No, no!
Vamanos.
You know what?
I'd best be going.
Santana Bravo.
My husband Matteo sent you that note.
That's his blood on the ground.
I need protection.
I can pay you.
Protection, from who?
El Abuelo.
He wants my ranch and he'll be back at dawn to take it.
Lady.
Unless you've got an army in your pocket,
I suggest you just give him what he wants.
Call it a day.
I can't do that.
Not anymore.
I'm sorry.
What you need, I ain't got.
Everything all right, Carmela?
Mr. Bravo, heard you just got released from Huntsville.
That's right, sir.
He came looking for work.
I told him we had none and that was the end of it.
That Matteo's old Henry rifle?
Like I said.
All the same, I think we'd best bring
Mr. Bravo back to the station, have a little chat.
Alright sir, just turn on that body camera.
Funny thing.
It was working fine this morning, but oh well.
Theirs too.
Go on now, get in.
I said get in.
I ain't going to ask you again.
Unless you got a warrant Jake, you can get off my property.
You might want to think twice about pointing
that blunderbuss at an officer of the law, Carmela.
Assuming it'd actually fire.
I'll tell you what...
Let's just forget the whole thing.
The lady here obviously doesn't wanna press any charges.
You're free to go.
That's for all the times you didn't get busted.
Now get.
Not that way.
That way.
Jake.
Just seeing him off.
You believe in justice Bravo?
That there's somebody bigger than both of us
making sure that the good prevail
and the bad get there just desserts?
Take this old hog killer...
Probably ain't been fired in a decade.
Got no idea if it still even shoot.
Now it stands to reason that if there's
a grand design in heaven,
all I gotta do is pull the trigger and find out what it is.
What do you think Bravo?
End of the line...
Or are you destined for better things?
Well damn, Susie.
Maybe this is your lucky day after all.
Well hallelujah.
Sorry son of a bitch.
By the way, El Abuelo sends his regards.
I'm sorry you had to be a part of this Carmela.
Truly am.
Fuck you Jake.
You're up.
Listen, sorry I couldn't keep the kidney.
Okay?
It's over there in a mason jar if you want it.
Keepsake or whatever.
It's not like I could sell it or anything.
Smells like mezcal and rat piss.
Anyway, welcome back.
What if I didn't wanna be back?
Well, maybe I don't wanna squeeze
my dog's anal glands to make healing paste.
Like mi esposa, Miguel over there.
He didn't wanna come back,
Did you, Miguelito?
Oh shit.
Don't let the silent treatment fool you.
He'll talk the hide off a cow when he gets going.
Ain't that right [speaking foreign language]?
You know I hate that.
Ah, what the fuck?
Now go get me some corn.
Bruja.
I prefer [speaking foreign language].
But bruja works, as does enchantress.
You're an old wives tale.
Hmm.
I'm dead.
I'm fucking dead.
Like him, I'm dead, fuck.
You feel that pendejo?
That's pain.
That's what the dead crave most.
They want to feel again, to feel anything.
You consider yourself lucky that I got to you just in time.
Like baby cakes over here,
why do you think he doesn't just walk out the door
and keep right on going, eh?
Ah [speaking foreign language], here it goes.
Because he knows that I could give him life.
And not just any life,
Not like you're walking dead variety.
I mean real life.
The kind that you're born into.
Full of pain and joy and satisfying sex.
But first, he has to earn it.
She is pure fucking evil.
Don't be so dramatic honey.
If you're looking for another play thing,
forget it, I'm not playing.
I'm looking for a man.
Who can stand up to El Abuelo.
I know who you are, Bravo.
And what he did to you.
I know what he did to your wife.
You don't know shit.
Every day I spent in that cell,
I dreamt of different ways he was dying.
But dreaming and doing are two different things.
But you are a legend Bravo.
Legends, they don't give up.
They don't quit.
They do now.
I don't believe you.
Back then I had a crew,
had my back, no matter what.
Now, I'm nothing like I used to be.
Well then you need a new crew.
And a kick in the ass.
There's nobody alive crazy enough
to stand up to Abuelo.
Alive, maybe not.
No.
Nah, no way.
No fucking way.
Come on, come on, here, drink this.
Drink it, you'll feel better.
I squeezed it just for you.
Vamos, vamos, get dressed.
Santana.
Lupe.
The Aztecs believed that the sun gave life to all things.
But the sun's light could not reach the underworld
and the souls who were trapped there.
For that, they needed the mother of all blades.
Blessed by the sun God, Huitzilopochtli.
Only human blood can harness the sun's power
and channel it down to the earth and create--
Is there a shorter version?
Cause we only got till dawn to save this lady's farm.
Just stand over a grave and bleed.
That's it.
That's it, no, no special words?
Ouch.
I'm gonna need your keys, take your truck.
Yes, here.
And I'm gonna take him with me.
Ah, Miguel?
He is useless as week old fish.
Yeah, but he can stop a bullet.
That's good for starters.
Bring him back in one piece and you know the piece.
So what's it like?
What?
Being dead.
Like you're locked in the trunk
of your stepdad's Buick Century Regal.
I know, weirdly specific, right?
And now?
You mean being one of the living dead...
It wears a bit thin after a while, for sure.
But I kind of like it in a way.
No pain, no expectations.
Wish I didn't feel any pain.
Are you looking?
I don't know his name.
Eugene, his name is Eugene.
Friend of yours?
Hardly, I put him there.
Hell of a first draft pick.
I must be gone in the head.
Hmm.
What?
Just never got to enjoy the process from up here before.
You might want to stand back a little.
What the hell?
A little more.
A lot more.
More back!
Holy shit!
Perhaps you use too much blood.
Wait a minute.
I was dead?
Crazy, right?
Did you do this?
Bravo.
Easy now big fella.
Damn, Bravo.
You still hit like a bitch.
Oh, that felt good.
Come on!
All right, easy, easy.
I didn't feel a thing.
Whatever you did to me, I liked it.
I'm back!
This ain't no free ride.
Huh?
I got a job for you.
No, see this dog don't bark for nobody.
Especially not your ass.
You see the world is going to remember Eugene B...
...Dobroz!
I'd think about that Hoss!
One week in the Texas sun,
you're gonna fall apart like pulled pork.
Only thing the world will remember about you
is your smell.
What the hell you know about that?
I can give you life.
Real life.
What you got right now, just a down payment.
So when do I get paid in full?
When the job's done.
Oh hell no.
Man, I ain't going nowhere looking like
the fucking butler from the Addams family.
If the shoe fits.
Who the fuck is he?
You know I can rip your head clean off,
right here, right now.
Shit down your neck and it wouldn't mean nothing.
Actually you couldn't.
The shitting part.
Listen here pencil neck.
Why don't you do yourself a favor and shut the fuck up?
So how does this zombie shit work?
I don't think of myself as a zombie.
More like a revenant.
Like DiCaprio minus the bear.
So we can't die?
Shot in the head or nothing?
Honestly, I've taken a bunch of bullets
but none to the brain.
Problem jefe?
Damn!
You know what I, I know he's around here somewhere.
I just don't know exactly where.
What's his name again?
He wasn't buried under his real name.
Hmm.
Had to do with his fortune in red diamonds
that went missing when he did his last bank robbery.
Marty Philander.
Tobo Wallace.
Whoa, Tommy Lasorda.
I didn't know he was buried here.
Tommy Lasorda.
With a real crappy headstone too.
Yep, dead as disco.
So why Tommy Lasorda?
Well you know I've always been a Braves fan.
So Hank Aaron was my first choice.
You wouldn't dare.
You look familiar.
Do I know you?
Oh yeah.
Used to be tight with the H town mob back in the day.
What's it to you?
Yeah, you're the dumb motherfucker
tried to ice my man Bravo here.
How'd that work out for you?
Oh shit!
Oh my neck!
Sons a bitches!
Dude, help me out here.
Listen!
You two pull that shit again,
and I'm putting you both back in the ground.
Damn.
Sorry compadre.
Sorry, ain't getting it.
What are they gonna do now?
There.
These idiots.
Aw.
She won't be alone, I fight with her.
I can't ask you to stay.
Then you can't ask me to leave.
If this is where I die, so be it.
My life has been good.
Well not that good, but good.
Carmela, there are no time for tears.
We have work to do, come.
Gracias, gracias.
So what now?
It looks like hitchhiking is pretty much off the table.
Hey, look what I found.
They buried you with your phone?
Yeah, I guess so.
See if it works.
Wakey, wakey my little chupacabra.
I'm back.
My ex, I like fucking with her.
Oh shit.
Dead battery.
Tommy,
you had a phone and you call your ex?
What the hell is wrong with you?
We got five hours to sun up.
More cemeteries to hit, and you--
Hey, gonna stop right?
You get 20 to life in this state for hit and run.
Hello pretty ladies.
Allow me to escort you outta your carriage.
We need a ringer.
I mean a veritable, bonafide superstar.
What about Quasimodo?
Quasimodo the wrestler?
I know where he's buried.
What?
Let's dig him up.
What the?
Yeah, I've been asking the same thing.
What's happening?
Shh, he's making the pitch.
Her name of Dolores.
She was his Juliet.
The love of his life.
He died for her and now he wants her back.
What?
This ain't fantasy island.
We need fighters, not lovers.
In the ring they call her the Banshee.
She can kill six men with a number two pencil.
A dozen more if she had a pencil sharpener.
Hell, that's my kind of woman, but still.
He says you get them both, or you get neither.
We can go for a two for.
Oh.
That's the Banshee?
That's her.
Dolores.
Mi amor.
Oh!
Mi amor!
Quasimodo, Banshee!
What if I killed myself to be free of you?
What do you think of that?
Oh, you are looking at 350 pounds of sad right there.
You're not helping cabrón.
Hey!
Don't wind me up, Missy, I don't wind down easy.
Listen.
Plus I have penchant for marriage, all right?
Ow!
Put a ring on it, puta.
Damn it!
That's my best nose picker.
That little, I'll bite that nose of yours off
and stick it up your ass.
Oh, you wanna try? Come on.
Hey!
Shut the fuck up!
Hey...
15.
That's it.
That's all we got.
Fuck man.
You put this on me after I was dead.
Bye.
What is he good at?
Busting heads with a stick.
So you a real hockey player
or you just like playing dress up?
What's your name man?
Stickface.
Stickface?
What the hell kinda name is that?
Like stick, plus face.
I get it.
Oh shit!
Oh...
Hey, let's keep it on the road boss.
Uh oh, why we stopping?
Everybody out, let's go.
They're here.
Grandma, they're coming.
Oh, my teeth.
Buenos días, Carmela.
Hope you all had a restful night.
Now honey, I know you ain't happy with the choices
in front of you right now,
but it's time to pick your switch.
What do you say you just come on out
with your hands on your head and we just ride on outta here.
Start over fresh.
I ain't saying you ain't brave and all, but the way I see it,
you're all hat and no cattle in this matchup.
So El Abuelo asks you for the very last time,
do you accept his--
What?
You weren't going to accept?
Let's fuck her up!
Hey, cabrón!
Quasimodo!
Fast ball.
Hey Miguel, get over here!
Welcome to the party Miguel.
Ah gracias.
Bravo, I though you were--
Don't worry, they're with me.
They're, they're--
Use your words.
Holy fuck.
You told me to get some help.
This is what I got.
I'm Tommy.
Carmela.
Ma'am.
No!
No one's gonna help me?
Buenas tardes, señora.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, fuck me running.
I've turned into my fucking grandmother.
Yep.
The sphincters pretty much take a vacation.
Alright, time to put out Geppetto.
It's time for me to turn into a real boy.
George Foreman's got a point there, boss.
You did make a promise.
I said when the job was done, it ain't done yet.
Hold on, hold on, hold, hold on.
Can't be moving the goal post now.
Look, we got here before sunrise.
We bitch smacked Abuelo's men.
The job is done.
Abuelo's gonna be back.
He'll have an army with him.
You afraid Eugene?
Don't nothing scare me.
Then prove it!
I'll keep up my end of the deal, you keep up yours.
So what'll it be?
We're gonna save this lady's farm or what?
I fight with Bravo.
I fight, Bravo.
If that grandma's in, me too.
Shoot.
This shit ain't over Bravo.
Alright, Miguel.
Yeah?
We need a look out. Go out and watch the main road.
The rest of us,
we have a house to fortify and an abuelito to kill.
Show me all the entry points.
Entry points.
Shut up.
Hector.
Is it your intention to kill me?
No.
Abuelo, never.
Then why do you come to my home to inform me
that Santana Bravo's still alive
instead of doing something about it?
I mean, we couldn't.
There was, there was, there was just nothing we could do.
Go on.
Well, you gotta understand he has a new posse now.
How many?
A hundred, 200?
No.
Um, six or seven.
Hundred?
Ah, total.
Total?
I see.
So you run away.
Pitter patter, little feet.
Like a, little girly girl, screaming?
No, look Abuelo, you gotta understand
there was nothing we could do all right?
I mean, we tried everything man.
This guy just, he, he couldn't be stopped.
You see that bear?
Yeah.
I didn't shoot him.
I killed him with a bent stick and a pine cone.
Abuelo, please.
Everything can be stopped.
Not this, this, no!
Uh, it helps if you have a gun.
We're gonna have to board up every entrance.
Cellar?
What's this?
Tunnels.
My grandfather used these tunnels to smuggle our family
and other people in need across the border.
It's been sealed up for years.
Then Trump built his wall
and the cartel started looking for ways
to move their product across the border.
That's why Abuelo wants this place.
Matteo was ready to dynamite the thing
so they'd leave us alone.
He didn't get the chance.
Is there lights?
Why didn't you tell me about this before?
I don't know.
I, I guess I didn't want you to think we were involved.
Lady, listen, I did 28 years in prison.
18 in the hole.
I don't judge anyone.
♪ Oh give me a home where the buffalo roam ♪
♪ Where seldom is hurt
Oh shit.
♪ An the skies are not cloudy all day ♪
Let me guess.
Jos-a and Jos-b?
Hey Manolo.
What's wrong with your face?
Not a time for glibness, amigo.
What happened to my men?
Do you want the clinical explanation?
Let's take a trip to the Olive Garden.
I love the Olive Garden.
Stop you're hurting me.
Who are you?
Look, I have a few teensy winsy boundary issues.
You want me to do all five fingers?
The thumb isn't technically a, a finger.
Oh and neither is the elbow.
What?
Shoot him in the balls.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Not the danglers.
Dito, Manolo.
Right, those are your names?
Yes, yes, like we're friends, right we're friends!
Come on, friends!
Yes?
You, you have TikTok?
Yes, no?
We have connection, yes?
In the mood to talk now.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
We could do that whole TikTok thing.
Just don't shoot me in the--
That was totally unnecessary.
Ah!
I'm a fucking Barbie now!
You,
you.
And since we're being so gratuitous.
Jesus Christ.
More like Nick Fury.
And to think I walked outta the house looking like this.
Kill him. Kill him.
Just thought you might want to know
what you're up against.
The others are like me, but way less chill.
You have been to see the bruja.
The bruja has been to see me.
Which explains the rot.
Comes with the package, I'm afraid.
And they say she restores the person to full life.
Not whatever you are.
That's premium package.
Is that what Bravo,
promised your compadres?
Vamanos.
Okay.
Well.
I oughta call this place the stitching post.
You are a Rembrandt of sewing, señora.
Eugene, Eugene, looking good, look at you!
Why don't you try to make it look better?
Oh, okay.
If I had a hand
Let me ask you a question.
Do you think we can really trust Bravo?
I do.
Well, you know, we haven't even seen this bruja
and her magical frijoles.
I mean, what if she doesn't exist?
What if he's just been playing us this whole time?
Guess we'll find out.
Oh man.
Really?
Little help?
Go on, finish up.
You know, it's funny how we spend our time.
Until we lose it.
You are a poet.
Put him in.
What am I doing?
I don't even wanna live.
Everyone's in position.
We have to get inside.
How did you do it?
How did you bring them back?
Have you ever been married Mr. Bravo?
Once, a long time ago.
Her name was Guadalupe.
She died 'cause she loved me.
Wouldn't you bring her back, if you could?
Their back.
Huh, one car.
Unless they're superhuman clowns or something,
color me unimpressed.
One car?
- Yeah. - Hold on, let me see.
I'll be damned.
It really is one car.
Ain't that some shit.
Where the hell's Miguel?
Get your!
Who's that?
La bruja.
Well, we gotta do something.
Please Bravo, don't let me die.
Don't let me die!
Bravo, please!
He only wants you, Bravo.
You might want do what the lady says.
Move mija.
I'm scared.
He wants you, Bravo.
Don't let me die.
It's gonna be okay.
I'll take care of this.
I swear.
I'll take care of this, I swear.
You're looking good.
She was mine Bravo.
You of all people should have known that.
She made her choice.
Sadly the wrong one for all concerned.
Isn't it amazing how times have changed?
I don't even need a detonator.
I just dial three.
Let's me and you finish this.
Abuelo, just me and you.
Mano a mano?
Oh!
Look at me.
These days, I fight for my life
just going up a flight of stairs.
Tell me this.
How do you think your undead friends are gonna react
when they find out their only chance of life, goes boom.
They'll want your head on a stick.
Right next to yours.
Imagine that, two brothers.
Side by side, heads on sticks.
We were never brothers.
Well not by blood, but in blood.
And that's a stain you don't wash off
no matter how hard you scrub.
Go, get him, go!
Bravo?
Shit!
Man, this changes everything.
Bru gone.
No, no, no!
You got some balls coming back here.
I'm so close.
I'm this close.
You'll get another chance.
You will.
You still have me
and a little old lady who was pretty good with a shotgun
and your posse.
I have nothing to offer them now.
Just be honest with them.
Time to do God's work, brother.
Whatever the hell that means.
Four!
That's the best they could do?
Come on.
Hey.
What are they doing now?
Nothing.
Not a damn thing.
Step aside Tommy Lasorda.
Huh?
Gonna put some biscuits in the basket.
Oh, you go get 'em, Stanley Cup.
He got a plan.
Time to get stick faced.
Uh oh.
Oh shit!
They blew up Sticky!
Shit.
I think that was a missile.
Damn it.
Fuck.
They're fixing to blow us all up.
Son of a bitch, that's Sticky!
Was Sticky.
Holy shit.
Now that just ain't fair.
What are we gonna do now, Bravo?
So what's plan B?
Where does this thing spit out?
An abandoned factory on the Mexican side.
Don't you let him get away, you motherfucker.
Keep moving, keep moving.
Oh shit!
No woman, stay back!
Get them!
I can't get to Bravo and the woman!
Fuck!
Taking fire!
Tommy!
Alright, Lasorda, come on.
Ah.
I thought there'd be more.
There will be.
Come on, any minute.
If you stay, I stay.
We'll be right behind you.
No Bravo.
Trust me, mija.
Let's go.
Okay, let's gather up all these grenades
and blow the hell out of this joint.
Not you, old friend.
You're all done here.
Hey, this ain't down to you.
Actually it is.
It's where we belong.
You still got some life, put it to good use.
Yeah, go out there and do something nice like,
save some kittens or something.
Let's do it again sometime.
You remember them red diamonds
that went missing during that San Antonio job?
Damn, you nasty.
Put 'em to good use.
Let's blow this joint.
Like you read about.
It's been a hoot, muchacho.
Where's Bravo?
I don't know mija, we got to go, we've gotta go.
Dolores.
- Ahhh!! - You mother--
Go!
Bravo!
Carmela, no, no!
Carmela!
Lupe.
No, you don't get to die on me Bravo.
Keep digging!
Here, here!
Bravo.
- Bravo! - Come on.
- Not breathing, - I know.
He's not breathing.
Bravo, bravo!
I know, [speaking foreign language].
No!
We have to go, we have to go, yeah.
He's dead, sweetheart.
We have to go, come.
No.
Take this.
Come to mommy.
Yeah!
Oh Bravo.
I thought I was kissing an angel.
Vamos!
Hola, amigos.
Remember we used to play here when we were kids?
Hide and seek.
Of course it was a avocado orchard back then.
Remember when we fell off the--
Kill me, I've already died twice today.
But let her be.
Sorry, we made a deal, her ranch or her life.
She chose unwisely.
Like your Guadalupe.
Funny how things come full circle, you know?
Miguel.
For Lupe.
And this is for Matteo.
Ah, ah, ah, look at me cabrón.
Look at me.
I want my face to be the last one you see.
Save me a seat by the fire, compadres.
What now?
Rebuild, somehow.
It won't be easy.
I'll manage.
Here, this might make it a little easier.
Uncut red diamonds, compliments of Tommy Lasorda.
Where was he keeping these?
You don't want to know.
Tommy.
You could stay, you know.
Help out, I could pay you, in diamonds.
No, mija, I got other plans.
I gotta go Carmelita.
I will, will.
Señora!
I don't think there's any place on Earth
more beautiful than this.
Unbelievable.
Most beautifulest place, this side of heaven.
Lately mija, I've been thinking, I'm tired.
I've done what I was put here to do.
And now...
...I think...
I'm ready to move on.
I just want to be with you, baby.
Not yet, mi amor.
Your body will heal and so will your soul.
You have so much more to do, Santana.
Hey, [speaking foreign language].
Bravo and the hand!
Look out, dead hand walking.
I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
Amigos till the end.
All cinco dedos.