1 00:00:01,435 --> 00:00:02,401 Adult mark: For most folks, 2 00:00:02,470 --> 00:00:04,903 Christmas is a time of peace on earth. 3 00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:06,304 At the critch house, 4 00:00:06,306 --> 00:00:08,239 It was just another excuse to argue. 5 00:00:08,241 --> 00:00:09,908 - Loosen up that garland, mary. 6 00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:12,710 What are you trying to do, decorate it or hang it? 7 00:00:12,747 --> 00:00:15,147 - Ugh! I hate this packin' thing! 8 00:00:15,282 --> 00:00:17,149 Why can't we have a real tree? 9 00:00:17,284 --> 00:00:20,185 Practically live in the woods. - Real trees are death traps! 10 00:00:20,187 --> 00:00:23,121 You ever hear of forest fires? They all begin with real trees. 11 00:00:23,190 --> 00:00:25,124 Adult mark: Deck the halls with boughs of plastic. 12 00:00:25,259 --> 00:00:27,593 - Good god! Will somebody pass me my toolkit? 13 00:00:27,728 --> 00:00:29,461 Adult mark: The old man's toolbox - 14 00:00:29,596 --> 00:00:31,730 A cookie tin filled with some nails, some tape, 15 00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,665 A flat head screwdriver, some buttons, 16 00:00:33,734 --> 00:00:35,167 And a rusty hinge. 17 00:00:35,302 --> 00:00:37,436 It was as useless as the old man himself. 18 00:00:37,571 --> 00:00:39,938 Pop: That's crooked. Down a bit on the left! Down! 19 00:00:40,007 --> 00:00:42,040 - Christ on a cracker! [knock at the door] 20 00:00:42,076 --> 00:00:43,875 - Who the frig could that be? [door clicks open] 21 00:00:43,944 --> 00:00:45,176 High voice: Any mummers allowed in? 22 00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:48,646 - [excited] oh, mummers! Pop: Oh my god! [laughs] 23 00:00:48,682 --> 00:00:51,416 Adult mark: Mummering is an old newfoundland tradition. 24 00:00:51,419 --> 00:00:54,419 You throw together a costume from things around the house - 25 00:00:54,422 --> 00:00:56,955 Old clothes, a pillowcase for a mask - 26 00:00:57,024 --> 00:00:59,792 And go door-to-door getting booze from neighbours 27 00:00:59,927 --> 00:01:01,226 Who would otherwise never let you in. 28 00:01:01,295 --> 00:01:03,362 [clapping] it's like Halloween for drunks. 29 00:01:03,497 --> 00:01:05,163 - It's all right, don't be frightened. 30 00:01:05,298 --> 00:01:08,033 It's somebody we already know. We just gotta guess who it is. 31 00:01:08,168 --> 00:01:10,636 - But everyone we know is already here. 32 00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:12,204 This is like a home invasion. 33 00:01:12,339 --> 00:01:14,005 - There'll be none o' that. 34 00:01:14,075 --> 00:01:15,974 All right, reveal yourself! Dick, is that you? 35 00:01:15,976 --> 00:01:17,375 - What's the matter, mike? 36 00:01:17,411 --> 00:01:19,645 Don't know your own brother? 37 00:01:19,780 --> 00:01:21,880 - Uncle brendan! [laughs excitedly] 38 00:01:21,949 --> 00:01:23,449 Both: [laughing] 39 00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:25,117 - Dad has a brother? 40 00:01:25,119 --> 00:01:27,385 Adult mark: I had no idea that I even had an uncle. 41 00:01:27,387 --> 00:01:29,388 While dad stayed behind caring for their parents, 42 00:01:29,523 --> 00:01:31,222 Brendan had travelled the world. 43 00:01:31,258 --> 00:01:32,825 Pop: Look at you. 44 00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:34,793 Adult mark: The very mention of his name would send dad 45 00:01:34,795 --> 00:01:37,595 Into a tizzy and so... His name was never mentioned. 46 00:01:37,631 --> 00:01:39,297 Pop: Have you lost weight 47 00:01:39,299 --> 00:01:41,633 Or is it just your brother that's getting fatter? 48 00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:43,601 Brendan: Oh. [laughs] 49 00:01:43,637 --> 00:01:45,303 If I had a woman like mary cooking for me, 50 00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:47,072 I'd be fat too, dad! 51 00:01:47,141 --> 00:01:49,674 - Oh, brendan, you always had a way with words. [chuckles] 52 00:01:49,676 --> 00:01:52,110 Brendan: And little mike, who's not so little anymore! 53 00:01:52,146 --> 00:01:54,613 My god, you've grown like a tapeworm. 54 00:01:54,682 --> 00:01:56,715 And this must be uh... Uh, uh, 55 00:01:56,784 --> 00:01:58,750 The other one! 56 00:01:58,752 --> 00:02:00,752 - Mark. I don't believe we've met. 57 00:02:00,821 --> 00:02:02,220 - Oh, that's 'cause last time I saw you, 58 00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:04,022 You were just a baby. Go on! 59 00:02:04,024 --> 00:02:05,524 I'm your uncle! Give us a hug. Arrrrgh! 60 00:02:05,659 --> 00:02:07,292 Jeez, mike, can't believe you didn't send 61 00:02:07,294 --> 00:02:09,027 So much as a picture. 62 00:02:09,029 --> 00:02:10,828 Mike sr.: Hard to do without an address, brother. 63 00:02:10,865 --> 00:02:12,631 Pop: Yeah, well, he's hard to track down 64 00:02:12,700 --> 00:02:15,567 With all his jet setting. Where are you these days? 65 00:02:15,603 --> 00:02:17,735 - All over the world, dad. 66 00:02:17,771 --> 00:02:19,972 Regina, fort mac... Pop: Oh! 67 00:02:19,974 --> 00:02:21,506 - Miramichi. - Oh. 68 00:02:21,509 --> 00:02:23,508 - So, you'll just be passing through then, I take it? 69 00:02:23,511 --> 00:02:25,310 - Just a quick stop. Gotta head downtown now, 70 00:02:25,379 --> 00:02:27,112 See if I can find myself a... 71 00:02:27,181 --> 00:02:29,314 Place to crash for the night. 72 00:02:29,350 --> 00:02:31,516 - Uh, there's vacancy at the skyline motel. 73 00:02:31,552 --> 00:02:33,451 - Uncle brendan can stay in my room with me. 74 00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:36,087 - Oh! Great! You can tell me about all the girls 75 00:02:36,123 --> 00:02:38,256 You got on the go, hey? [laughs] 76 00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:40,725 This calls for a toast. You got any liquor, brother? 77 00:02:40,794 --> 00:02:42,728 - Dad only drinks the wine in church. 78 00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:45,330 Pop: Mike, there's a bottle of rum in the trunk in my room. 79 00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:46,798 Go get it. 80 00:02:46,934 --> 00:02:48,900 Not every day I get to drink with my son. 81 00:02:48,969 --> 00:02:50,335 - Ha, ha, ha! 82 00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:52,871 That garland's a mess. Pop: Ah! 83 00:02:52,873 --> 00:02:54,239 [garland rustles] 84 00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:56,608 Ah! Perfect! 85 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,747 - Why didn't you tell me I had an uncle? 86 00:03:01,749 --> 00:03:03,482 - You never missed much, believe me. 87 00:03:03,617 --> 00:03:05,483 Mary: [muttering] gonna need more molasses, more ham, 88 00:03:05,553 --> 00:03:08,186 More margarine, more potatoes... - I wouldn't count on him 89 00:03:08,189 --> 00:03:10,021 Sticking around very long, mary. 90 00:03:10,090 --> 00:03:11,856 Pop: What? There's nothing wrong with family 91 00:03:11,892 --> 00:03:13,859 Wanting to be home for christmas. 92 00:03:13,861 --> 00:03:16,294 I mean, give him a break, b'y. 93 00:03:16,330 --> 00:03:18,563 Mike sr.: A break?! His whole life has been a break. 94 00:03:18,566 --> 00:03:20,999 All that man does is take, take, take! 95 00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:22,901 - Figure'd I give you your presents now. 96 00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,436 No sense trying to hide anything 97 00:03:24,438 --> 00:03:26,371 In a house this small. [chuckles] 98 00:03:26,373 --> 00:03:28,473 [inhales and exhales deeply, wrapping paper crinkles] 99 00:03:28,609 --> 00:03:30,341 Mike! 100 00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:32,243 [rustling] oh! 101 00:03:33,781 --> 00:03:36,581 Pop. - Oh, no! Really? 102 00:03:36,584 --> 00:03:40,084 [wrapping paper rustles and tears] 103 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:41,620 - That's a fondue set! 104 00:03:41,622 --> 00:03:44,455 For dipping bread in cheese. 105 00:03:44,457 --> 00:03:46,924 - You mean like fingers? [wrapping paper rips] 106 00:03:46,961 --> 00:03:49,327 Pop: Oh my! A clock-radio! 107 00:03:49,363 --> 00:03:52,331 Ah, you see, mike? It's okay for a son 108 00:03:52,466 --> 00:03:54,466 To give his father a little present now and then. 109 00:03:54,535 --> 00:03:57,402 - Yeah, like free room and board for a couple of decades? 110 00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:59,270 - Well, I wouldn't wanna insult you 111 00:03:59,306 --> 00:04:01,673 By offering ya rent, ya stunned ass! 112 00:04:01,709 --> 00:04:05,310 Brendan: This is just a small token of my appreciation 113 00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:07,546 For letting me stay here. - Oh... 114 00:04:07,548 --> 00:04:09,414 You don't need to appreciate us, 115 00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,650 We're your family! 116 00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:14,052 [wrapping paper tears] 117 00:04:15,889 --> 00:04:18,222 - Springsteen's box set?! Pop: What? 118 00:04:18,259 --> 00:04:19,691 - That's too much, now, brendan. 119 00:04:19,826 --> 00:04:22,226 - Well, nothing's too good for my little roomie. 120 00:04:22,263 --> 00:04:25,396 Now, you didn't think I forgot about my other nephew, did ya? 121 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:29,334 ♪♪♪ 122 00:04:29,403 --> 00:04:31,703 [clap, giggles gleefully] - [frustrated exhale] 123 00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:35,040 [paper tears] - a switcheroo-bot...? 124 00:04:35,175 --> 00:04:37,775 Is that supposed to be like a transformer? 125 00:04:37,811 --> 00:04:41,246 - Mark. What do you say to your uncle? 126 00:04:41,248 --> 00:04:43,315 Adult mark: I hope you kept the receipt? 127 00:04:43,317 --> 00:04:44,783 - [weakly] thanks. 128 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:46,617 Adult mark: I was loyal to my father. 129 00:04:46,654 --> 00:04:48,486 Mary: [chuckles] 130 00:04:48,488 --> 00:04:50,388 [gasps] oh, brendan. 131 00:04:51,458 --> 00:04:55,260 Oh! It's gorgeous! [gasps] 132 00:04:55,262 --> 00:04:56,795 Brendon: [chuckles happily] 133 00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:58,463 - Oh, it must've cost a fortune! 134 00:04:58,532 --> 00:05:00,298 - Oh, I'm sure it's nothing 135 00:05:00,301 --> 00:05:01,799 Compared to what mike has for ya. 136 00:05:01,835 --> 00:05:03,802 - Oh, we don't bother with gifts after all these years. 137 00:05:03,871 --> 00:05:05,737 - We exchange cards. 138 00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:08,273 I thought you said cards were more special than gifts. 139 00:05:08,275 --> 00:05:10,208 Brendan: You've still got a lot to learn about women. 140 00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:11,409 [laughs] 141 00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:13,545 - Yeah. 142 00:05:13,547 --> 00:05:15,447 - Oh, it's-it's-it's too much. 143 00:05:15,582 --> 00:05:17,949 Here, I... I can't. - What?! 144 00:05:17,951 --> 00:05:19,884 - For god's sake, keep the coat. 145 00:05:19,953 --> 00:05:22,354 Mike, don't be such a bloody sook. 146 00:05:22,356 --> 00:05:24,823 - It's not up to me. It's your gift. 147 00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:27,092 - That's the spirit. - Well... 148 00:05:27,227 --> 00:05:29,494 Maybe just this once? Hmm? 149 00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:31,363 Brendan: [chuckles] 150 00:05:31,365 --> 00:05:32,397 - [sighs appreciatively] oh... 151 00:05:32,532 --> 00:05:34,633 Pop: That fits like a glove, mary. 152 00:05:34,635 --> 00:05:36,835 [liquor pours] - mike! You don't drink. 153 00:05:36,904 --> 00:05:39,037 - Maybe just this once. 154 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,706 Brendan: Jesus. Mary: Oh! Oh... No! 155 00:05:41,742 --> 00:05:43,375 Oh, look! 156 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:44,876 They left the security tag on it. 157 00:05:44,912 --> 00:05:46,912 Oh, I'll just bring it back to ayre's. 158 00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:49,313 - Don't you worry about that, my dear. 159 00:05:49,350 --> 00:05:52,384 Nothing I can't get into with a butter knife. 160 00:05:52,386 --> 00:05:53,919 Ungh! [security tag clicks] 161 00:05:53,921 --> 00:05:55,987 - Huh! [laughs] - nothin' to it! 162 00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,724 Now... How about that drink? 163 00:05:59,993 --> 00:06:01,460 Pop: Ah, there you go! [chuckles] 164 00:06:01,595 --> 00:06:04,462 ♪♪♪ 165 00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:05,797 Pop: Ah... [chuckles] brendan: [gasps] oh ho! 166 00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,665 [glass thunks] pop: [laughs] 167 00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:10,535 Adult mark: As I drifted off to sleep, 168 00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:13,138 The sound of all the adults in the house getting tanked 169 00:06:13,207 --> 00:06:16,541 Somehow made me feel safer than I'd ever felt in my life. 170 00:06:18,945 --> 00:06:20,846 [school bell rings] 171 00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:22,480 Sister margaret: I know everyone is excited 172 00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:24,716 For santa claus. - Am I? 173 00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:26,551 - [gasps, then sighs] student: [gasp] geez! 174 00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,220 Hello, sister. 175 00:06:28,222 --> 00:06:30,254 I was just talking to the children about christmas. 176 00:06:30,290 --> 00:06:34,092 - And where in the bible would I find santa claus, sister? 177 00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:40,499 Children, I want to talk to you 178 00:06:40,634 --> 00:06:43,635 About keeping christ in christmas. 179 00:06:45,773 --> 00:06:48,072 [chalk scrapes] 180 00:06:49,943 --> 00:06:52,777 That's christmas, or... 181 00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:56,180 [chalk taps and scrapes] 182 00:06:56,216 --> 00:06:57,916 Christ mass, not xmas. 183 00:06:59,553 --> 00:07:03,054 When you say "xmas," you are crossing out christ. 184 00:07:04,425 --> 00:07:06,257 [chalk scrapes] 185 00:07:06,293 --> 00:07:09,961 And what is an x but a sideways cross, 186 00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:13,331 Or... 187 00:07:13,333 --> 00:07:15,934 [chalk scrapes] a crucifix. 188 00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,535 Student: [clears throat] 189 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:20,505 Every time you write xmas, boys and girls, 190 00:07:21,742 --> 00:07:25,576 You are literally crucifying jesus. 191 00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:30,548 Ho, ho, hosanna in the highest. 192 00:07:30,617 --> 00:07:32,316 [church bell tolls] 193 00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,085 Adult mark: Whatever happened to rudolph? 194 00:07:34,154 --> 00:07:36,053 Sister margaret: Well, that was uh... Festive. 195 00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:37,622 [chuckles] 196 00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:40,992 Sister rose has a point buried in there somewhere. 197 00:07:41,028 --> 00:07:44,929 Christmas is the baby jesus' birthday party, not yours. 198 00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:47,098 That is why it is better to give a gift 199 00:07:47,134 --> 00:07:48,767 Than to receive one. 200 00:07:48,902 --> 00:07:50,835 So, we are having a hamper drive, 201 00:07:50,838 --> 00:07:53,471 Collecting donations of toys for needy children. 202 00:07:53,507 --> 00:07:56,174 I need some volunteens to help. 203 00:07:56,176 --> 00:07:57,909 Any volunteens? 204 00:07:58,044 --> 00:07:59,611 Oh! 205 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:01,846 - Hate to lose out on a technicality, 206 00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:03,614 But... We're not teens. 207 00:08:03,650 --> 00:08:05,283 But we'd love to help. 208 00:08:05,285 --> 00:08:07,184 - Ha! What a bunch of elf suck-holes. 209 00:08:07,221 --> 00:08:10,121 Sister margaret: And fox. Welcome to the volunteens. 210 00:08:10,123 --> 00:08:13,124 Maybe you'll learn to be a little more considerate. 211 00:08:13,126 --> 00:08:14,759 Student: [clears throat] 212 00:08:14,795 --> 00:08:18,462 [east coast-flavoured "jingle bells" plays] 213 00:08:18,499 --> 00:08:20,031 Mike sr.: [groaning] 214 00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:22,333 ♪ jingle all the way, oh what fun... ♪ 215 00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:24,202 - God, mike. 216 00:08:25,605 --> 00:08:27,471 ♪ jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way... ♪ 217 00:08:27,508 --> 00:08:29,073 You sick? 218 00:08:29,142 --> 00:08:31,609 ♪ oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh ♪ 219 00:08:31,645 --> 00:08:34,145 [shocked] jesus murphy, no... 220 00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:36,814 You're hungover! - Yeah, well, so are you! 221 00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:39,383 - No, I'm still drunk, it's different. 222 00:08:40,487 --> 00:08:42,020 Why, if I'd known you were around the sauce, 223 00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:44,055 I woulda dragged you down to the legion last night! 224 00:08:44,091 --> 00:08:45,890 I dj-ed their christmas party 225 00:08:45,893 --> 00:08:48,426 And I did not skimp on the david bowie. 226 00:08:48,428 --> 00:08:50,495 What a night! 227 00:08:50,564 --> 00:08:53,765 I went home with fifty dollars and leanne lush. 228 00:08:53,834 --> 00:08:55,500 [clacks teeth, then sucks his teeth] 229 00:08:55,635 --> 00:08:57,501 I'm busier than a bayman with two woodstoves these days, 230 00:08:57,538 --> 00:08:59,437 What with all the... The christmas parties 231 00:08:59,573 --> 00:09:01,439 And events the station has me doin'. 232 00:09:01,508 --> 00:09:04,042 The money's good, but the hours are a nightmare. 233 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,711 - You know, I could cover some of those shifts for ya, dick. 234 00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,780 - You? 235 00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:11,182 You turn your nose up at this stuff, mike. 236 00:09:11,184 --> 00:09:13,851 - I need to pick up a little bit o' extra gift money, okay? 237 00:09:13,921 --> 00:09:16,321 Share the wealth, hey? It's christmas after all. 238 00:09:17,457 --> 00:09:18,856 ♪ ...To ride in a one-horse open sleigh ♪ 239 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:20,792 ♪ jingle bells, jingle bells... ♪ 240 00:09:20,794 --> 00:09:22,794 - Well, there is one gig I'm trying to get out of. 241 00:09:22,929 --> 00:09:24,862 The money's good, 242 00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:27,999 But trust me, you wouldn't want it. 243 00:09:28,134 --> 00:09:29,801 ♪ open sleigh! Yup! 244 00:09:29,936 --> 00:09:32,003 [indistinct chatter, christmas music plays softly] 245 00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:33,805 - God, that thing's so lame. 246 00:09:33,874 --> 00:09:37,274 Ritchie: I mean, why ask a tree what you want for christmas 247 00:09:37,311 --> 00:09:39,877 When santa is around the corner? 248 00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:43,214 Happy tree: Good god! A barbie dream house?! 249 00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:44,915 That's much too expensive! 250 00:09:44,952 --> 00:09:48,019 When I was your age, you'd be lucky to get an orange. 251 00:09:48,088 --> 00:09:50,422 Kids these days. Spoiled rotten! 252 00:09:50,424 --> 00:09:52,691 [instrumental "I saw three ships" plays in the mall] 253 00:09:53,794 --> 00:09:54,893 - Dad? 254 00:09:58,298 --> 00:10:00,031 Adult mark: While ritchie collected the toys, 255 00:10:00,166 --> 00:10:02,133 I was focused on the tree. 256 00:10:02,268 --> 00:10:04,802 - Dad? Are you in there? 257 00:10:04,871 --> 00:10:06,604 Mike sr.: What? Good god, no! 258 00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:08,773 - [sighs] I can tell it's your voice. 259 00:10:08,908 --> 00:10:10,708 Mike sr.: No, this is the happy tree. 260 00:10:10,744 --> 00:10:12,677 End of discussion, mark! Go home! 261 00:10:12,812 --> 00:10:14,779 - How'd you know my name then? - Dammit! 262 00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:16,714 - Why are you inside the happy tree? 263 00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:18,883 - I'm trying to earn a little bit of extra money 264 00:10:18,885 --> 00:10:20,418 For christmas. Don't tell your mother. 265 00:10:20,454 --> 00:10:22,920 Or your idiot uncle, for god's sake. 266 00:10:22,990 --> 00:10:25,456 - You're too old to talk to the happy tree, doofus. 267 00:10:25,492 --> 00:10:27,859 Happy tree: Uh, hello, fox. How's your christmas? 268 00:10:27,861 --> 00:10:30,395 - Shut up, tree! You're... You're lame! 269 00:10:30,397 --> 00:10:31,696 Come on. 270 00:10:31,765 --> 00:10:33,564 - How'd that tree know my name? 271 00:10:33,634 --> 00:10:34,932 - I know, right? 272 00:10:36,003 --> 00:10:37,769 - These toys kinda suck. 273 00:10:37,771 --> 00:10:39,671 Mark: Imagine waking up on christmas day 274 00:10:39,806 --> 00:10:41,773 And this is all you had to play with? 275 00:10:41,775 --> 00:10:43,474 [bear tumbles] 276 00:10:43,610 --> 00:10:44,742 Ow... 277 00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:46,644 [plastic bag rustles] 278 00:10:46,647 --> 00:10:48,279 - What was that for? 279 00:10:48,348 --> 00:10:50,348 - Probably saw someone she knows. 280 00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:53,818 [blues music plays softly] 281 00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:55,687 - Ya ever see a tape deck in a car before? 282 00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:58,423 - No! This is awesome. 283 00:10:58,425 --> 00:10:59,757 What year is she? - Agh! 284 00:10:59,793 --> 00:11:01,759 Car is like a man. 285 00:11:01,795 --> 00:11:03,761 Age don't matter as long as you got spunk. 286 00:11:03,897 --> 00:11:06,131 Besides, this is more than a car. 287 00:11:06,133 --> 00:11:08,432 This is my office, and a hotel room. 288 00:11:10,904 --> 00:11:12,770 - You sleep in your car? 289 00:11:12,906 --> 00:11:15,039 Cool! Cool! [amazed laugh] 290 00:11:15,042 --> 00:11:16,640 - Have to when you're an entrepreneur. 291 00:11:16,677 --> 00:11:19,244 Mind you, it's not always all it's cracked up to be. 292 00:11:20,580 --> 00:11:22,680 [inhales, paper sizzles] - yeah. 293 00:11:22,716 --> 00:11:25,049 I can't wait to get outta here. 294 00:11:25,052 --> 00:11:27,251 I've been saving up money for school. 295 00:11:27,287 --> 00:11:29,054 Got about a grand now. 296 00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:31,756 - A grand? How? 297 00:11:31,825 --> 00:11:33,758 - Two years of mowin' grass and shovellin'. 298 00:11:33,893 --> 00:11:35,927 I do the station, the car lot, and uh, old mrs. Hicks' place. 299 00:11:36,062 --> 00:11:37,595 - Well, now, why would you wanna 300 00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:38,996 Waste that money on school 301 00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:41,199 When you could be like me and make money? 302 00:11:41,334 --> 00:11:43,801 All you need is the open road and... 303 00:11:43,837 --> 00:11:46,137 A car. 304 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:48,839 - [sighs] yeah. 305 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:52,544 Nah. Nah, I go for my licence in may, 306 00:11:52,679 --> 00:11:55,279 But... I could never afford one. 307 00:11:55,315 --> 00:11:57,448 - [sighs sympathetically] 308 00:12:01,154 --> 00:12:04,021 You know, maybe... 309 00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:06,023 You could buy mine. 310 00:12:07,694 --> 00:12:09,494 I'm thinking of an upgrade anyway. 311 00:12:09,629 --> 00:12:11,162 Here's what we'll do. 312 00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:13,498 You give me whatever you got now, 313 00:12:13,567 --> 00:12:15,099 As a deposit, 314 00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:17,435 And then I'll come back for the rest 315 00:12:17,504 --> 00:12:20,037 Once you've got your licence, and... 316 00:12:20,107 --> 00:12:22,373 She's all yours! - Oh, that would be awesome! 317 00:12:22,375 --> 00:12:23,841 [laughs excitedly] 318 00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:25,976 [laughter dies] 319 00:12:26,112 --> 00:12:28,179 Uh... But... 320 00:12:28,215 --> 00:12:30,381 I should probably run it by my dad first. 321 00:12:30,383 --> 00:12:32,650 - [laughs derisively] 322 00:12:34,053 --> 00:12:35,653 Forget it. 323 00:12:35,789 --> 00:12:37,988 Look, kid, 324 00:12:38,024 --> 00:12:39,824 There's two ways to move through this life. 325 00:12:39,959 --> 00:12:42,326 You can be like your old man, always afraid to do anything, 326 00:12:42,328 --> 00:12:43,861 [draws sharply on his joint] 327 00:12:43,897 --> 00:12:46,531 Or... You can be like me. 328 00:12:48,635 --> 00:12:50,067 Do you want a little hoot? 329 00:12:51,438 --> 00:12:53,537 - No. No, I don't do that stuff. 330 00:12:53,573 --> 00:12:55,239 - Oh, come on. It's just us-- - yeah, okay. 331 00:12:56,643 --> 00:12:58,343 - [exhales] 332 00:12:58,478 --> 00:13:01,145 [draws sharply on his joint] - easy! 333 00:13:01,214 --> 00:13:03,615 [blues music plays] 334 00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:08,753 [mike jr. Coughs] 335 00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:09,920 Mike jr.: Woo! 336 00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:14,425 - Needing a hamper for two boys - one four, one six. 337 00:13:14,427 --> 00:13:18,095 - Two boys - one four, one six. 338 00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:20,231 Adult mark: We assigned the toys to needy families. 339 00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,766 Like santa, we made a list and checked it twice. 340 00:13:22,803 --> 00:13:26,303 - 'kay, a 17-year-old boy, 16-year-old boy, 341 00:13:26,339 --> 00:13:29,073 A five-year-old boy and a 12-year-old girl. 342 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:31,075 - They're gonna clean us out. 343 00:13:31,077 --> 00:13:33,144 The only family I know that big is... 344 00:13:35,248 --> 00:13:37,715 - Oh, god. [gulps] it's fox. 345 00:13:39,519 --> 00:13:41,786 - We said the toys were pathetic. 346 00:13:41,788 --> 00:13:43,921 - Oh jesus, oh jesus, oh jesus... 347 00:13:43,957 --> 00:13:45,890 [clipboard thumps] 348 00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:47,591 Fox: Hey, dicks. 349 00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:49,394 Looks like you're almost done filling up the barf bags. 350 00:13:49,529 --> 00:13:52,463 - Uh... If you mean hampers of amazingness, 351 00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:53,998 Then yes! 352 00:13:54,034 --> 00:13:56,133 I can't believe people are just giving this stuff away! 353 00:13:58,038 --> 00:14:00,204 Uh, in this one, I believe we have... 354 00:14:00,273 --> 00:14:03,474 Socks, [chuckles] 355 00:14:03,476 --> 00:14:05,376 A water gun, 356 00:14:05,378 --> 00:14:07,345 [wrapping paper rustles] 357 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,979 Rubik's cube, 358 00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:13,084 And... 359 00:14:13,153 --> 00:14:14,886 A switcheroo-bot! 360 00:14:15,021 --> 00:14:16,955 Where'd that come from? Who cares? 361 00:14:17,090 --> 00:14:19,023 [chuckles] it's all gold! 362 00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:20,558 [box thuds lightly] 363 00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:22,093 - That's the best one. 364 00:14:22,095 --> 00:14:23,761 You take it, fox! 365 00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:26,230 We won't say anything. 366 00:14:26,233 --> 00:14:28,999 - Gross! Why would I want other people's junk? 367 00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:33,704 [paper rustles] 368 00:14:36,543 --> 00:14:38,109 [paper rustles, clipboard clatters loudly] 369 00:14:38,244 --> 00:14:40,111 [footsteps recede] 370 00:14:40,180 --> 00:14:41,646 - [sighs heavily] 371 00:14:46,853 --> 00:14:48,319 Gets underway this weekend. 372 00:14:48,454 --> 00:14:50,387 The parade route will start at the top of water street, 373 00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:53,358 And finish all the way down at the end of water street. 374 00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:55,960 Mike critch, vocm news. 375 00:14:56,095 --> 00:14:58,029 - That what passes for news around here these days? 376 00:14:58,031 --> 00:14:59,964 - Your brother can make a murder scene 377 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:01,933 Out of jam on toast. 378 00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:03,734 [mocking] the victim was covered 379 00:15:03,770 --> 00:15:05,937 In what appeared to be blood. A knife was found on the scene. 380 00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:09,273 Robbery was the motive. The suspect needed a little bread. 381 00:15:09,276 --> 00:15:11,809 Mike critch, vocm news. 382 00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:14,845 [bottles thump] 383 00:15:14,915 --> 00:15:16,748 - You know, speaking of mike, 384 00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:19,350 Where's he been goin' at night, dick? 385 00:15:19,386 --> 00:15:21,752 - How should I know? I'm not his babysitter. 386 00:15:21,788 --> 00:15:24,622 - Well, I seen you driving him somewhere after work. Hmm? 387 00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:27,091 He doesn't have a licence. 388 00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:28,892 - Trouble in paradise, mary? 389 00:15:28,929 --> 00:15:31,295 I can guarantee you he hasn't got someone on the side. 390 00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:33,564 Sure, he can barely handle you! [chuckles] 391 00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:35,065 - [unamused] huh. 392 00:15:36,636 --> 00:15:38,702 You know, surely you knows where you dropped him off to, 393 00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:40,104 Huh? 394 00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:42,040 See, it's christmas eve-eve and... 395 00:15:42,042 --> 00:15:44,241 Well, I don't know where my husband is, so... 396 00:15:44,311 --> 00:15:47,711 [friendly chuckle] you can either finish that beer 397 00:15:47,747 --> 00:15:49,647 And tell me what's goin' on, 398 00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:53,251 Or I can break the friggin' bottle over your greasy head. 399 00:15:53,253 --> 00:15:56,687 ♪ it's christmas in the harbour ♪ 400 00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:01,192 Adult mark: For some reason, it was much easier 401 00:16:01,327 --> 00:16:03,394 To talk to my father when he was a tree. 402 00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,462 - We tried to give her all the best stuff. 403 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:08,065 I even gave her my switcheroo-bot. 404 00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:12,003 [sighs heavily] what did I do wrong, dad? 405 00:16:12,138 --> 00:16:14,071 - Well, there's a difference between a hand up 406 00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:15,906 And a hand out. 407 00:16:15,942 --> 00:16:18,342 I know what it was like to grow up with nothin'. 408 00:16:18,411 --> 00:16:21,779 Fox is a very proud person and you embarrassed her. 409 00:16:21,848 --> 00:16:24,215 That's why the hampers are supposed to be anonymous. 410 00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:29,553 - [sighs] I guess I'd better find her and apologize. 411 00:16:29,622 --> 00:16:32,090 [instrumental of "silent night" plays in the mall] 412 00:16:32,225 --> 00:16:35,492 Mike sr.: Look, I know we don't have much money either. 413 00:16:35,528 --> 00:16:38,495 I try to do my best. I hope you know that, but... 414 00:16:38,531 --> 00:16:40,698 I love you, son. 415 00:16:42,268 --> 00:16:44,502 Hmm. Feels good to say that out loud. 416 00:16:44,637 --> 00:16:48,272 You know, your pop never did tell me that he loved me. 417 00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:50,508 - What the frig are you going on about, mike? 418 00:16:50,643 --> 00:16:52,309 Mike sr.: Good god! Mary?! 419 00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:54,111 [indistinct chatter] 420 00:16:55,581 --> 00:16:57,849 - Pack off and wait your turn, hmm? 421 00:16:57,984 --> 00:17:00,084 The lot o' ya. 422 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:03,187 Hello, mr. Tree. 423 00:17:03,223 --> 00:17:04,855 [eyes whir] 424 00:17:04,891 --> 00:17:07,458 For christmas, I would like my husband to stay home 425 00:17:07,494 --> 00:17:09,727 And stop worrying about getting me a present 426 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:11,396 Just because his sleeveen brother 427 00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:13,464 Stole a coat from ayre's. 428 00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:16,200 Mike sr.: I guess I look pretty foolish now, don't I? 429 00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:20,137 - You never looked better. 430 00:17:23,309 --> 00:17:26,911 - I'm not that good with words, and I don't say it enough, but... 431 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:29,613 - Oh, come outta there and give me a hug. 432 00:17:31,284 --> 00:17:33,551 - I can't leave my box, mary. The kids'll see me. 433 00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,486 [indistinct chatter] 434 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:37,889 - Oh. 435 00:17:38,024 --> 00:17:39,156 Huh. 436 00:17:40,359 --> 00:17:41,959 Excusez-moi. 437 00:17:43,063 --> 00:17:45,496 ♪♪♪ 438 00:17:45,532 --> 00:17:48,299 [door scrapes open] 439 00:17:49,903 --> 00:17:52,436 Oh, turn that thing off. [mic pops but stays on] 440 00:17:52,439 --> 00:17:54,839 Isn't this romantic! Now, give me that hug. 441 00:17:54,908 --> 00:17:56,307 Mike sr.: Uh, I can't. 442 00:17:56,442 --> 00:17:58,442 You're gonna have to move your leg to the right. 443 00:17:58,511 --> 00:18:00,945 Mary: No, I can't. I'm pinned against the wall. 444 00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,746 [mic jostles] mike sr.: Well, turn sideways. 445 00:18:02,782 --> 00:18:04,715 [eyes whir] mary: Oh! I'm stuck. 446 00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:06,450 Ow! You're on my hair, ya arsehole! 447 00:18:06,519 --> 00:18:08,386 Mike sr.: [grumpy] d'oh! Well, damn it all to hell then! 448 00:18:08,388 --> 00:18:10,521 [zipper zips sharply, footsteps recede quietly] 449 00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:14,459 Pop: Hmm. Brendan: [surprised chuckle] 450 00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:16,727 - Can't get no privacy in a house this size. 451 00:18:16,862 --> 00:18:18,830 - No room for secrets. 452 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:22,466 Are you going somewhere, b'y? 453 00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:24,702 - I got this big thing coming down the pipe, dad. 454 00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:26,670 Thing is, I gotta move fast. 455 00:18:26,805 --> 00:18:28,940 - Oh. How can you do that? 456 00:18:29,075 --> 00:18:31,241 I heard you sold your car. 457 00:18:31,277 --> 00:18:33,477 - Well, I never sold it. 458 00:18:33,546 --> 00:18:35,546 Kid just put down a little deposit. 459 00:18:35,582 --> 00:18:38,682 - So you'll be givin' him his money back. 460 00:18:38,751 --> 00:18:41,352 - Right now, it's kinda tied up in this business venture. 461 00:18:44,424 --> 00:18:47,424 - You're gonna break the boy's heart. 462 00:18:47,494 --> 00:18:51,094 Can't it wait 'til after christmas? 463 00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:53,931 - Holidays never meant that much to me. 464 00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:59,504 - Neither did I. 465 00:19:04,144 --> 00:19:05,542 [footsteps recede quickly] 466 00:19:07,380 --> 00:19:09,180 So long, idiot. 467 00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:13,084 ["children's winter" by the barra macneils plays] 468 00:19:13,086 --> 00:19:16,787 ♪ the winter's snow is a child's delight ♪ 469 00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:20,324 ♪ as it brightens up a winter's night... ♪ 470 00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:21,759 - [chuckles] 471 00:19:21,894 --> 00:19:23,528 Adult mark: Sometimes the perfect gift 472 00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:25,262 Is just telling someone that you love them. 473 00:19:25,398 --> 00:19:27,564 - It's just what I wanted. 474 00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:30,134 [light kiss] 475 00:19:30,136 --> 00:19:32,936 ♪ the smiling faces watch the ground... ♪ 476 00:19:32,972 --> 00:19:34,739 [drawer scrapes closed] 477 00:19:34,874 --> 00:19:38,075 Adult mark: And sometimes it's saying nothing at all. 478 00:19:38,111 --> 00:19:41,546 ♪ and through the glass there comes no sound ♪ 479 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:45,149 ♪ as the snowflakes melt upon it... ♪ 480 00:19:45,151 --> 00:19:46,417 [footsteps approach] 481 00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:48,552 ♪ snowman, snow house hey, play with me ♪ 482 00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:50,321 - Where's uncle brendan? 483 00:19:50,390 --> 00:19:52,957 - Oh, he had to, uh, leave in a bit of a hurry. 484 00:19:55,494 --> 00:19:58,462 He wanted me to give you this. 485 00:19:58,464 --> 00:20:00,698 He decided he couldn't sell the car. 486 00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,299 [the envelope crinkles, cash rustles] 487 00:20:07,407 --> 00:20:09,440 - [blows out his breath, relieved] 488 00:20:09,509 --> 00:20:11,308 - Hmm. - Thanks, pop. 489 00:20:11,344 --> 00:20:13,143 Adult mark: When it comes down to it, 490 00:20:13,213 --> 00:20:15,046 Christmas is about family. 491 00:20:15,048 --> 00:20:17,848 Sometimes it's the family you are born into... 492 00:20:17,850 --> 00:20:21,018 And sometimes it's the family you choose. 493 00:20:22,922 --> 00:20:24,589 [envelope rustles] 494 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,524 I thought a hamper full of toys 495 00:20:26,526 --> 00:20:28,459 Would make for a merry christmas, 496 00:20:28,528 --> 00:20:30,661 But the best gifts don't come from malls, 497 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,897 They come from the heart. 498 00:20:34,433 --> 00:20:35,966 Mary and mark: Mmm... 499 00:20:36,002 --> 00:20:38,002 Adult mark: I don't remember many of the presents, 500 00:20:38,137 --> 00:20:40,871 But I remember every christmas in our little house. 501 00:20:40,940 --> 00:20:43,808 - Wastin' our good... Perfectly good bread, wasted. 502 00:20:43,943 --> 00:20:46,010 Adult mark: The best gifts aren't under the tree, 503 00:20:47,213 --> 00:20:48,345 They're the people around it. 504 00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:50,348 - [chef's kiss] - oh my god, it's too hot. 505 00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:52,483 Mary: Hot! [mouthful] mm-hmm. - [disgusted] mm! 506 00:20:52,552 --> 00:20:54,184 - Woo! - Really good. [laughs] 507 00:20:54,220 --> 00:20:55,419 Mike sr.: [disgusted] oh god... 508 00:20:55,554 --> 00:20:57,121 Pop: Crusty bread. [laughter] 509 00:20:57,256 --> 00:20:59,957 Adult mark: Like snowflakes, each christmas was unique... 510 00:21:00,026 --> 00:21:01,492 [laughter] 511 00:21:01,561 --> 00:21:05,029 - ...And like snowflakes, each one was gone too soon. 512 00:21:06,099 --> 00:21:07,898 ♪♪♪ 513 00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:17,041 ♪♪♪ 514 00:21:17,110 --> 00:21:24,047 ♪♪♪ 515 00:21:24,083 --> 00:21:30,988 ♪♪♪ 516 00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:36,994 ♪♪♪