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Guerrero:
In the early 2000s,
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"girls next door" was one
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of the most popular
reality shows on tv.
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We all fell in love with
those blonde girls next door,
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and we also fell in love
with hugh hefner.
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That world seemed
fun and innocent,
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and the girls were
pretty fun to watch.
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In the final season of the show,
two twins,
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karissa and kristina shannon,
played two of hef's girlfriends.
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-Hi. I'm kristina.
-I'm karissa.
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After the "secrets of playboy,"
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they decided
to finally come forward
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and share their story.
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And we're about to hear
a side of their story
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that they have never told
until today.
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It's like you're in a cult.
The isolation that I had--
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I was a shell of a person.
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Hef doesn't like to use
protection.
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There was at one point
an std that went around.
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I got a call saying, like,
"hey, you're pregnant."
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I didn't want any part of it.
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He's just a creepy old man
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with power.
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♪♪♪
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♪♪♪
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you know, I've been fascinated
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with, uh, your stories,
because although
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I'm a chief investigative
correspondent
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on "inside edition"...
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Why would you
try to take advantage
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of young women like this?
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...When I was 20 and 21,
I used to be a "playboy" model.
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I shot for "playboy" lingerie,
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and then eventually
I did a cover...
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-Oh, wow. I didn't...
-...In 2006.
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And there are so many questions
I wanna ask you.
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I think the best way to do this
is to just talk about
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how you got there to begin with
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and a little bit
about your background.
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Tell me about your childhood
and--and how you grew up
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and where you grew up.
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We were three months premature.
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We were born
in ann arbor, michigan.
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Our biological mom was
never involved in our lives.
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We didn't even get
to really know our father.
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-He was very abusive.
-We always think to ourselves
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we were born into this life
together because we knew
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we were gonna need each other.
-We were gonna...
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That's so sweet, and that's, um,
that's really sad.
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Our father's side
is the one who raised us,
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so when we refer to "mom,"
that's--it's our grandma.
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-Your grandma.
-Annette.
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Yeah, our grandma.
But she's "mom" to us.
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And where did you grow up?
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We moved to
clearwater beach, florida,
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with our grandmother.
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She was really, like,
our stability, our foundation.
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When my grandfather passed away
of cancer,
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he had left her
under a mountain of debt,
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so we ended up having to move
off of clearwater beach
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and into a trailer park
in florida.
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-For four years.
-For four years.
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Basically, school wasn't
an option for us.
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We had to drop out
and get jobs.
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We worked at winghouse
as waitresses,
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which is the same exact outfit
like hooters.
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You have a dolphin short.
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And we always wanted
to be models,
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so this was like the beginning
of our modeling career,
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is being able to be like
winghouse girls,
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doing commercials, menus,
billboards.
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Wings, beer, and atmosphere.
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Both: And yes,
we're identical twins.
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All: Need we say more?
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How old were you when you first
started working for winghouse?
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Both: 15.
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And you kind of considered this
glamorous.
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-Yeah.
-Yeah.
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So we were like,
"this could be our chance."
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yeah.
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At what point did you start
watching "girls next door"?
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-15, 16.
-So I think that's when
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we were hostessing.
We were fans of the show.
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We were very much fans, yeah.
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And we loved kendra
and most identified with her.
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'cause she was the younger one.
She liked rap.
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She was more like hip-hop
like us.
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We liked rap music.
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This is interesting because
the fan base was young women.
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We knew there
would be some interest
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because it was
the playboy mansion.
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What I did not anticipate
was how
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hugely popular it would become,
and particularly,
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how hugely popular
with young women.
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We wanted to have their boobs.
We wanted to, like,
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we were dirty blonde naturally.
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We wanted to have
platinum blonde hair.
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So the playboy mansion--
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I'm, like,
it just looks like heaven.
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It's like you're royalty there,
and hef looks so nice.
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You viewed the mansion
as an adult disneyland.
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-Yes, exactly.
-Yeah.
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Did you ever think that you
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would end up
on "girls next door"?
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No, not at all.
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We just wanted to be models,
but, um,
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when we were watching
"the girls next door,"
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and we were modeling
for winghouse,
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the photographer's, like,
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"hey, I know how to get girls
into 'playboy.'"
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"and, like, do a photo shoot
and submit your photos."
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"and do a photo shoot
and submit your photos."
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-how old were you?
-Both: 17.
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-17.
-Both: Mm-hmm.
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So you're underage.
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-Underage, yeah.
-Mm-hmm.
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Asked if you would be willing
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to take nude pictures
to send to "playboy."
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-yeah. Yeah.
-Correct.
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Now do you remember
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the first time that you posed
for "playboy"?
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We were flown out to miami
for a test shoot.
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-We had just turned 18.
-Mm-hmm.
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And, um, it was tasteful.
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That was al the first time
that I looked at a,
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you know, a monitor and seen
we're actually beautiful.
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-I've never had, you know...
-Hair and makeup done.
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...Professional hair and makeup
and all that.
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And it's like, oh, my gosh.
We are gorgeous.
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What happens next? How do you
actually get out to the mansion?
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Halfway through the test shoot
in miami,
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they were sending
the photos over,
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and all of a sudden, we see
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the photographer talking
really fast
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to someone on the phone.
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Then all of a sudden, they just
quit, and they're like,
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"hefner likes them.
He wants 'em there."
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and we were like... [gasps]
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"oh, my god. So we're playmates?
Did we make it?"
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and they're like,
"oh, yeah, you made it."
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-oh, my gosh. Hef loves them.
-They said hef loved the photos.
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They said holly loved
the photos.
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That must have been
an amazing feeling.
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-It was.
-It really was.
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They ended up
reaching out to us.
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Holly called, actually,
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and she said, "oh, you made
'playboy' playmate,"
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and they wanted us to fly out
to california to shoot
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55th anniversary
on the tv show.
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And we... [laughs]
so we quit our job.
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We quit winghouse,
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put together two luggage bags,
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and we're just getting ready
to go to california.
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And then on top of it, you're
going to the playboy mansion,
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and you're gonna be shooting
a tv show,
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and you're gonna be part
of the 55th anniversary search.
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It was a big deal.
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We had the hef 1 limo
pick us up...
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-They miked us.
-...From the airport.
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-Miked us right away.
-Yeah.
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So when we first drove up
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and saw
the mansion gates opening,
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this is what we saw on tv.
♪ come on-a my house ♪
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both: ♪ my house ♪
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driving up, it was like
you're in tv land.
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It just didn't seem real.
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It's like "willy wonka
and the chocolate factory."
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you're like, oh, my god.
I'm here.
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Or you're like,
the golden ticket.
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You know what I mean?
Like, oh, my god.
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I got the golden ticket.
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And we're just driving up
to shoot our centerfold,
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and then they, like, stopped
at the security gate,
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and they were like,
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"okay, we're gonna film you guys
getting out,"
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and they just started
directing you right away,
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and we just signed
a release form.
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They're like, "you guys are
gonna sign this release form."
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did you read it
before you signed it?
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No.
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Never read a contract
in our life.
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-Didn't know what we were doing.
-We just--we were 18.
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Once you're there
and you're seeing, like,
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it's like don't meet your hero
behind the curtain or whatever,
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that's, like,
totally what it was.
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It just started
becoming a job right away.
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I remember seeing holly
for the first time,
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and it was a completely
different person.
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What do you mean?
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Like, before the cameraman
would get her walking
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into the house,
she'd just be like, you know,
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sitting there, you know, fixing
her lipstick or whatever.
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Drinking.
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-Wouldn't even talk to you.
-You know?
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And then when the cameras
would go up,
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she's just back into character
again.
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All of it was for sure fake.
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And that's one thing that hef
was a genius at--was his image.
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-You thought it was fake.
-Mm-hmm.
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You didn't think
that he was really sleeping
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with these young girls.
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Hell, no. You don't think
an 80-year-old man
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is sleeping
with three of these women.
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Did it, uh, occur to you
at some point
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that the girls had boyfriends?
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I actually thought that holly,
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since she was
the main girlfriend,
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I thought that she, you know,
was really trying to marry hef.
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For bridget, I kinda feel like
she was just holly's sidekick,
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but with kendra,
you could totally tell that
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she had dated on the side.
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Was it starting to occur to you
that these three women
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were on their way out the door,
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and they were gonna be looking
for new girlfriends?
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We didn't think they were
leaving at all.
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Okay, so then from there,
you go home.
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And then what happened?
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Yeah, so hef wrote a letter,
old school,
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and he said, "I would love for
you guys to be my girlfriends
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and to move in with me
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and film
'the girls next door' show."
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so when we got the letter,
we were like,
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of course, we're gonna go.
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You knew what it meant
to have a boyfriend...
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-Mm-hmm.
-...Which is, at your age now,
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a sexual relationship.
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-Mm-hmm.
-Right.
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Did you view the words
in that letter
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as something sexual?
-No. [laughs]
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no. No, no, no.
Not at all. [laughs]
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when he said--when he said
to move in and be girlfriends
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and live at the mansion...
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We were girlfriends on the show.
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...We thought, okay,
come be part of the tv show.
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You thought you were gonna be
cast members in a tv show.
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00:08:20,801 --> 00:08:22,167
-Yeah. Exactly.
-Exactly.
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It was the best thing that's
gonna happen to us from the life
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that we were coming from.
This was insanely huge.
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So you joined the show.
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How soon afterwards
do you realize
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that you're supposed to have
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a relationship with hef
off-camera?
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00:08:33,981 --> 00:08:35,847
Almost six months we were there.
244
00:08:35,949 --> 00:08:38,149
So during that six months...
245
00:08:38,252 --> 00:08:39,417
The other girls
were transitioning out.
246
00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:40,886
...The other girls,
the old girls next door
247
00:08:40,988 --> 00:08:42,654
were transitioning out,
so, like, we would hear
248
00:08:42,756 --> 00:08:44,523
on speakerphone,
kendra ordering, like, pasta
249
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:47,559
and all the stuff and we were
like, what the hell?
250
00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:49,227
She was pregnant,
and we didn't know.
251
00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:51,162
So we were, like, we heard that,
like, we were, like,
252
00:08:51,265 --> 00:08:53,899
understanding holly's staying
in a separate bedroom now.
253
00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:58,003
And on our 19th birthday,
we all went out to a club,
254
00:08:58,105 --> 00:09:00,405
and that was the night that
realized we were...
255
00:09:00,507 --> 00:09:02,073
-What we got ourselves into.
-...What we got ourselves into.
256
00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:03,875
Like, this is what it is.
257
00:09:03,977 --> 00:09:06,611
So you turn 19,
and you all go out.
258
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:07,913
And what happens next?
259
00:09:08,015 --> 00:09:09,414
We had a bunch of the playmates
260
00:09:09,516 --> 00:09:10,849
that are shooting from our year.
261
00:09:10,951 --> 00:09:12,651
Holly was with us.
Kendra was with us.
262
00:09:12,753 --> 00:09:13,952
We were all going out
263
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:16,388
to a nightclub
for our 19th birthday.
264
00:09:16,490 --> 00:09:19,491
And we were drinking,
and then on the way back,
265
00:09:19,593 --> 00:09:21,459
kendra in the limo is like,
"you guys wanna smoke weed?
266
00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:23,261
Do you guys smoke weed?"
267
00:09:23,363 --> 00:09:24,829
and we're like,
"hell, yeah, we smoke weed."
268
00:09:24,932 --> 00:09:26,331
so we get back to the mansion,
and we went upstairs
269
00:09:26,433 --> 00:09:29,267
to smoke weed in hef's room.
270
00:09:29,369 --> 00:09:32,203
And at the time,
holly was not in there.
271
00:09:32,306 --> 00:09:36,775
So it was me, karissa,
kendra, and hef.
272
00:09:36,877 --> 00:09:38,243
But when we all went
to go smoke pot,
273
00:09:38,345 --> 00:09:40,845
kendra didn't smoke.
274
00:09:40,948 --> 00:09:42,948
So she leaves right when we're
all going to smoke pot.
275
00:09:43,050 --> 00:09:46,551
It was just me, you, and hef,
and he knew we were nervous.
276
00:09:46,653 --> 00:09:48,186
We were super nervous
when kendra left.
277
00:09:48,288 --> 00:09:49,454
-We didn't feel comfortable.
-Super nervous 'cause...
278
00:09:49,556 --> 00:09:51,556
And then he says,
"hey, you could take this.
279
00:09:51,658 --> 00:09:53,725
It will make...
You won't be so nervous."
280
00:09:53,827 --> 00:09:55,160
hugh hefner offers you a pill.
281
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:56,127
-Pills.
-Mm-hmm.
282
00:09:56,229 --> 00:09:57,629
And...
283
00:09:57,731 --> 00:09:59,097
There were a couple pills
in his hand.
284
00:09:59,199 --> 00:10:00,732
-A couple of pills.
-Mm-hmm.
285
00:10:00,834 --> 00:10:02,334
-Do you take them?
-Both: Yeah.
286
00:10:02,436 --> 00:10:03,635
-You took them.
-Yeah.
287
00:10:03,737 --> 00:10:06,237
-He's 83. You're 19.
-Correct.
288
00:10:06,340 --> 00:10:07,706
So did you think that
you would be having sex
289
00:10:07,808 --> 00:10:09,841
with hugh hefner that night?
290
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:10,976
Both: No.
291
00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:13,278
-Not at all. No.
-Mnh-mnh.
292
00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:17,983
T's your 19th birthday.
You've been to the club.
293
00:10:18,085 --> 00:10:19,618
You've been drinking,
294
00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:21,052
and now you've accepted pills,
295
00:10:21,154 --> 00:10:22,754
and you don't really know
what those are,
296
00:10:22,856 --> 00:10:25,290
from hugh hefner.
297
00:10:25,392 --> 00:10:27,258
How are you feeling
at this point?
298
00:10:27,361 --> 00:10:30,028
[bleep] up. Like...
299
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:32,163
Really hazy
and just, like, laying--
300
00:10:32,265 --> 00:10:34,399
the most inebriated
we've ever been.
301
00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:37,335
We were wasted.
302
00:10:37,437 --> 00:10:39,537
So when we got back,
we were smoking pot,
303
00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:42,374
taking pills, and just...
304
00:10:42,476 --> 00:10:43,842
We're just gone.
305
00:10:43,944 --> 00:10:46,478
[laughs]
306
00:10:46,580 --> 00:10:49,414
so that night when we did
get back to his room,
307
00:10:49,516 --> 00:10:51,850
we put on the pajamas
and all that, you know?
308
00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:56,388
Um, I just remember me being
on one side of him,
309
00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:58,990
karissa being on the other side
of him.
310
00:10:59,092 --> 00:11:03,061
He was pulling our heads down,
like a very hard pull
311
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:06,197
down to his penis so that we
would give him oral sex.
312
00:11:06,299 --> 00:11:08,967
♪♪♪
313
00:11:09,069 --> 00:11:12,237
and that was our 19th birthday.
You're never gonna forget that.
314
00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:14,339
♪♪♪
315
00:11:14,441 --> 00:11:19,077
we had never done a threesome
together before.
316
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,012
We'd never want to.
317
00:11:21,114 --> 00:11:23,948
He didn't--
he didn't even finish.
318
00:11:24,051 --> 00:11:25,750
Just imagine this.
Just imagine his old hand,
319
00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:28,520
and it kind of shakes,
touching a boob.
320
00:11:28,622 --> 00:11:31,456
It's gross. It's like you're
having sex with your grandpa.
321
00:11:31,558 --> 00:11:33,725
And he laid there looking up,
and he was like,
322
00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:37,295
"my babies. My babies.
See, you love me."
323
00:11:37,397 --> 00:11:40,098
we were watching the clock
next to his bed,
324
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:42,333
and it was like 4 a.M., 5 a.M.,
325
00:11:42,436 --> 00:11:44,469
we're waiting for him
to fall asleep. He falls asleep.
326
00:11:44,571 --> 00:11:45,770
We ran down the hall
327
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:46,905
to the spare bedroom
that we were in.
328
00:11:47,007 --> 00:11:49,874
We hit the shower,
steaming hot,
329
00:11:49,976 --> 00:11:51,943
and, like, our skin was red
from just trying to, like...
330
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,912
Both: Sterilize.
331
00:11:54,014 --> 00:11:55,613
Wow.
332
00:11:55,716 --> 00:11:58,817
After that night, I didn't feel
like my body was mine anymore.
333
00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:01,419
Like, I felt used, disgusted.
334
00:12:01,521 --> 00:12:04,689
Yeah, like, I didn't wanna,
you know, call my mom
335
00:12:04,791 --> 00:12:05,990
and tell her anything.
336
00:12:06,093 --> 00:12:07,292
-And now--
-both of us said
337
00:12:07,394 --> 00:12:08,927
he's going straight to hell.
-Oh, we both, like,
338
00:12:09,029 --> 00:12:10,195
he's the devil. This is insane.
339
00:12:10,297 --> 00:12:12,997
We were disgusted
with ourselves.
340
00:12:13,100 --> 00:12:16,735
Why did you feel like
you had to do it?
341
00:12:16,837 --> 00:12:20,638
Coming from our abusive father
342
00:12:20,741 --> 00:12:23,742
and our biological mom leaving,
343
00:12:23,844 --> 00:12:25,276
we really felt like
we had to take care
344
00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:28,146
of our grandmother
who raised us,
345
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,115
and we didn't want him
to take away
346
00:12:30,217 --> 00:12:31,416
all of the success
that we had built.
347
00:12:31,518 --> 00:12:34,652
We thought he'd revoke
our centerfold.
348
00:12:34,755 --> 00:12:35,687
There was no going back.
349
00:12:35,789 --> 00:12:37,589
You couldn't--
we couldn't leave.
350
00:12:37,691 --> 00:12:40,692
♪♪♪
351
00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:45,563
I believe that hef would prey
on the younger girls like us
352
00:12:45,665 --> 00:12:47,699
who came from a bad background
353
00:12:47,801 --> 00:12:50,301
or the girls who were not
so pretty--
354
00:12:50,403 --> 00:12:51,770
he could promise them, like,
355
00:12:51,872 --> 00:12:53,238
"oh, here's this beautiful
castle, and you know,
356
00:12:53,340 --> 00:12:56,474
I have all these surgeons,"
and he can make them beautiful
357
00:12:56,576 --> 00:12:59,110
or give them an option
to do "playboy,"
358
00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:02,046
or, like, provide
this playboy family to you.
359
00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:05,617
Did it occur to you
that he was grooming you?
360
00:13:05,719 --> 00:13:06,918
Both: Yeah.
361
00:13:07,020 --> 00:13:09,354
For sure. That--I think
that's how he does it.
362
00:13:09,456 --> 00:13:10,989
'cause we were only 18,
turning 19.
363
00:13:11,091 --> 00:13:12,757
Mm-hmm.
364
00:13:12,859 --> 00:13:14,225
We were just learning
and wanted to be women,
365
00:13:14,327 --> 00:13:16,528
and, like, we've never even
had bleach in our hair.
366
00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:17,996
We don't know about makeup.
367
00:13:18,098 --> 00:13:21,166
He really is grooming us,
completely.
368
00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:23,701
Everything's yes. You, like,
get to eat what you want.
369
00:13:23,804 --> 00:13:24,836
The butlers are calling you.
370
00:13:24,938 --> 00:13:26,271
You can have alcohol
on a platter.
371
00:13:26,373 --> 00:13:30,041
I'm like, "oh, patrón
and pineapple, hell, yeah!"
372
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:33,645
when we moved in,
we got media training.
373
00:13:33,747 --> 00:13:34,612
I wanna talk about that
for a second.
374
00:13:34,714 --> 00:13:36,714
-Mm-hmm.
-What is media training?
375
00:13:36,817 --> 00:13:38,983
What did you understand it
to be?
376
00:13:39,085 --> 00:13:41,119
They would just explain to us,
you know, how to, um,
377
00:13:41,221 --> 00:13:45,056
answer certain questions and how
to dodge certain questions.
378
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:48,459
That would come up, like,
the sister question.
379
00:13:48,562 --> 00:13:50,895
What is the sister question?
380
00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:53,998
Well, a lot of people would say
we were incest
381
00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:57,101
'cause we were both with him.
382
00:13:57,204 --> 00:13:58,136
So they would say, you know...
383
00:13:58,238 --> 00:14:00,338
They'd think
we were hooking up.
384
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:01,873
So, like, those type
of questions,
385
00:14:01,975 --> 00:14:04,275
and it's kind of going
with grooming you on how to act.
386
00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:08,179
Is it kind of weird
maybe kissing your boyfriend
387
00:14:08,281 --> 00:14:10,281
after he's kissed your sister?
388
00:14:10,383 --> 00:14:11,416
-No.
-Not at all?
389
00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:13,718
Mnh-mnh.
390
00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:15,553
Ahh! [laughs]
it's called acting.
391
00:14:15,655 --> 00:14:17,589
So they kind of warned you
392
00:14:17,691 --> 00:14:20,058
that this is what the press
is gonna be asking you.
393
00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:21,192
-Mm-hmm.
-Well--
394
00:14:21,294 --> 00:14:22,994
and here's what to say,
'cause--
395
00:14:23,096 --> 00:14:25,129
what we didn't realize, though,
is he was protecting his image.
396
00:14:25,232 --> 00:14:27,398
They're training us
to protect...
397
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:28,533
Both: His image.
398
00:14:28,635 --> 00:14:30,335
It was not about us.
399
00:14:30,437 --> 00:14:33,605
Okay, so you guys say
that you partied a lot
400
00:14:33,707 --> 00:14:34,739
at the mansion.
401
00:14:34,841 --> 00:14:36,207
So let's take a look
at this clip,
402
00:14:36,309 --> 00:14:39,143
and you tell me
what was happening here.
403
00:14:39,246 --> 00:14:42,547
♪♪♪
404
00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:44,816
kristina,
we have to practice. Kristina!
405
00:14:44,918 --> 00:14:47,585
♪♪♪
406
00:14:47,687 --> 00:14:48,753
kristina, get up.
407
00:14:48,855 --> 00:14:50,855
We were drunk every night,
408
00:14:50,957 --> 00:14:51,990
so it was hard to get up
in the morning
409
00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:53,791
and have to do everything.
410
00:14:53,894 --> 00:14:56,694
-You were drunk every night?
-Every night to deal with him.
411
00:14:56,796 --> 00:14:58,363
Wake up in the morning.
412
00:14:58,465 --> 00:15:00,265
Especially kristina. I-I have
to get her up sometimes.
413
00:15:00,367 --> 00:15:02,433
-That was an all-nighter.
-Yeah.
414
00:15:02,535 --> 00:15:05,203
Dinner started at 5 every
Friday, Saturday, and Sunday,
415
00:15:05,305 --> 00:15:07,305
so at dinner is
when we would start drinking.
416
00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:09,107
They had open bar.
417
00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:10,742
We would start drinking
just in case
418
00:15:10,844 --> 00:15:13,077
hef wanted to apply
that pressure.
419
00:15:13,179 --> 00:15:16,614
We'd party just like normal,
and he's like,
420
00:15:16,716 --> 00:15:19,851
"obviously, you girls don't
wanna sleep in my bedroom"
421
00:15:19,953 --> 00:15:22,453
because he realized we were
422
00:15:22,555 --> 00:15:23,988
waiting for him to fall asleep
and leave.
423
00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:26,357
He's, like, not waking up
with the twins next to him.
424
00:15:26,459 --> 00:15:28,493
So he's like,
"we need someone else."
425
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,929
[cheering]
426
00:15:31,031 --> 00:15:33,064
and so down at
one of the parties,
427
00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:35,500
that's when we introduced him
to crystal harris.
428
00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:37,502
We have a roped-off party,
429
00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:39,537
and we're just sitting there,
like, at the table,
430
00:15:39,639 --> 00:15:43,141
and there's tons of girls.
Like, I mean, a pool of girls.
431
00:15:43,243 --> 00:15:44,342
And they're like,
"hef, hef, hef,
432
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:45,910
can I get a picture
with you?"
433
00:15:46,012 --> 00:15:49,681
crystal was one of the ones
who came in with a friend,
434
00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:53,918
and then she ended up staying
in his room, sleeping there.
435
00:15:54,020 --> 00:15:55,186
That night?
436
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:56,521
She actually slept that night
and every other night.
437
00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:57,989
-Stayed over.
-Stayed over.
438
00:15:58,091 --> 00:16:00,925
Uh, around midnight,
at the parties,
439
00:16:01,027 --> 00:16:02,360
he'd say, "oh, well, you know,
I'm getting tired.
440
00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:05,296
Let's go upstairs," and we
kinda noticed the pattern.
441
00:16:05,398 --> 00:16:06,597
After a while,
it was like midnight.
442
00:16:06,700 --> 00:16:07,966
He really always wants
to go upstairs.
443
00:16:08,068 --> 00:16:10,335
And a bunch of girls
would just be begging
444
00:16:10,437 --> 00:16:13,104
to go upstairs with hef--
begging.
445
00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:15,406
And he's like, "is it okay
with you if they come up?"
446
00:16:15,508 --> 00:16:17,375
and we're like, "we don't mind."
447
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:19,277
-go ahead.
-Do what he wants.
448
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:21,279
Clearly, if he maybe is
fulfilled with those girls,
449
00:16:21,381 --> 00:16:23,715
he won't want us.
-So we, uh--
450
00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:25,683
we just did not want
any part of that.
451
00:16:25,785 --> 00:16:31,756
But, um, the problem was is hef
doesn't like to use protection.
452
00:16:31,858 --> 00:16:32,890
-So he wouldn't use condoms?
-No.
453
00:16:32,993 --> 00:16:34,459
-No.
-From the butlers,
454
00:16:34,561 --> 00:16:37,729
we'd just order like a bowl--
big bowl,
455
00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:40,832
and we'd put hot water in it.
Then we'd put rags in it.
456
00:16:40,934 --> 00:16:45,236
So whoever was, you know,
having intercourse with him,
457
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:48,306
when they were finished,
they can wipe him off,
458
00:16:48,408 --> 00:16:50,608
and then the other girl could...
459
00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:51,909
-Do it.
-...Do it.
460
00:16:52,012 --> 00:16:53,211
And so you had to take it
upon yourself...
461
00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:54,345
Yeah.
462
00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:57,448
...To try to have
some semblance of...
463
00:16:57,550 --> 00:17:00,218
-Yeah.
-To avoid infections.
464
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:04,122
There was at one point
an std that went around.
465
00:17:04,224 --> 00:17:07,525
We caught chlamydia, and, um,
466
00:17:07,627 --> 00:17:09,660
I remember going down
to mary o'connor's office--
467
00:17:09,763 --> 00:17:13,898
his assistant/
I'd say house mom for us,
468
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:15,366
and, uh, she's like,
469
00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:17,301
"well, that's what happens
when you're sexually active."
470
00:17:17,404 --> 00:17:19,437
we freaked out.
471
00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:21,239
When she said stds were normal
when you're sexually active,
472
00:17:21,341 --> 00:17:24,208
we're like, "everyone's out
of their mind here."
473
00:17:24,310 --> 00:17:26,744
well, this whole thing is--
is terrifying, I'm sure, for...
474
00:17:26,846 --> 00:17:29,447
-Yeah.
-...For 19-year-old women.
475
00:17:29,549 --> 00:17:33,951
Are you still intimate
with him during this stage?
476
00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:35,386
After we caught the std,
477
00:17:35,488 --> 00:17:38,322
we said we would never
have sex with him again.
478
00:17:38,425 --> 00:17:40,124
-That was it?
-Both: That was it.
479
00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:43,061
And we got different treatment
because of that.
480
00:17:43,163 --> 00:17:46,364
♪♪♪
481
00:17:49,035 --> 00:17:50,134
from what I understand,
there were rules
482
00:17:50,236 --> 00:17:51,135
that you had to live by...
-Mm-hmm.
483
00:17:51,237 --> 00:17:53,037
...When you were,
uh, on the show
484
00:17:53,139 --> 00:17:55,139
and you lived at the mansion.
-Mm-hmm.
485
00:17:55,241 --> 00:17:56,941
What were some of the rules?
486
00:17:57,043 --> 00:17:59,844
The rules were we had
a 9:00 curfew.
487
00:17:59,946 --> 00:18:03,781
We weren't allowed to be seen
out with other men,
488
00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:05,583
couldn't date other men.
489
00:18:05,685 --> 00:18:08,820
He told us if we loved him
490
00:18:08,922 --> 00:18:11,122
and we wanted to be
his girlfriends,
491
00:18:11,224 --> 00:18:14,058
we had to have sexual encounters
with him.
492
00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:16,961
So he turned it
into proof of love.
493
00:18:17,063 --> 00:18:19,097
-Yeah.
-Proof of love, exactly.
494
00:18:19,199 --> 00:18:21,365
♪♪♪
495
00:18:21,468 --> 00:18:22,733
I feel like
on "girls next door,"
496
00:18:22,836 --> 00:18:24,936
hef was portrayed as like
a kindly grandpa,
497
00:18:25,038 --> 00:18:26,437
but that's not how he is.
498
00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:31,476
It would make me so angry
how manipulative he was.
499
00:18:31,578 --> 00:18:34,078
Are there rules? Like, can you
have boyfriends at all?
500
00:18:34,180 --> 00:18:35,880
-No.
-No.
501
00:18:35,982 --> 00:18:37,014
-You're not allowed to.
-Hef is our boyfriend.
502
00:18:37,117 --> 00:18:38,382
-So...
-How do you know when you're
503
00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:39,984
called to the master bedroom?
Do you have nights?
504
00:18:40,086 --> 00:18:41,219
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
505
00:18:41,321 --> 00:18:42,887
Hef controlled every aspect
of our life.
506
00:18:42,989 --> 00:18:45,523
You were encouraged
to not have friends over.
507
00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:46,791
You weren't really allowed
to leave
508
00:18:46,893 --> 00:18:49,560
unless it was like
a family holiday.
509
00:18:49,662 --> 00:18:52,330
There was a 9 p.M. Curfew,
uh, as a girlfriend,
510
00:18:52,432 --> 00:18:56,734
so you had to be on the property
by 9 p.M.
511
00:18:56,836 --> 00:18:59,170
When it came to us,
it was like, no.
512
00:18:59,272 --> 00:19:02,807
He tightened the belt even more.
He didn't want us to leave.
513
00:19:02,909 --> 00:19:06,144
He hung, uh, certain things
over our head.
514
00:19:06,246 --> 00:19:08,946
We got punished, so, like,
515
00:19:09,048 --> 00:19:11,716
we weren't allowed to do
anything without security.
516
00:19:11,818 --> 00:19:13,484
He said, "the twins can't
go visit their family
517
00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:15,186
unless security's there."
518
00:19:15,288 --> 00:19:18,055
he had even had security
follow you
519
00:19:18,158 --> 00:19:20,091
if you went to the mall or...
-Both: Oh, yeah.
520
00:19:20,193 --> 00:19:21,659
Mm-hmm. We'd be downstairs,
and he'd have
521
00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:23,427
three security guards
watching me
522
00:19:23,530 --> 00:19:24,896
and watching karissa.
523
00:19:24,998 --> 00:19:26,330
And they would always
in the morning
524
00:19:26,432 --> 00:19:27,999
come up with their report
525
00:19:28,101 --> 00:19:29,834
of every single thing
we did that night
526
00:19:29,936 --> 00:19:31,736
the next morning for him.
527
00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:35,206
Wait, what? They would write
reports on everything you did?
528
00:19:35,308 --> 00:19:36,974
-Everything.
-Everything we did.
529
00:19:37,076 --> 00:19:38,743
-Who we would hang out with.
-Who we were hanging out with,
530
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:42,813
what we were drinking,
what we ate. Everything.
531
00:19:42,916 --> 00:19:44,115
Every time we left the property,
532
00:19:44,217 --> 00:19:46,584
when did we leave,
what time did we get back?
533
00:19:46,686 --> 00:19:48,219
And then when
we did start realizing
534
00:19:48,321 --> 00:19:49,654
we have to hang out
with playmates,
535
00:19:49,756 --> 00:19:51,622
what playmates were we hanging
out with? What did they eat?
536
00:19:51,724 --> 00:19:53,758
What's with
the "what did they eat?"
537
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:55,693
-he likes his girls thin.
-To be thin.
538
00:19:55,795 --> 00:19:56,827
-Very thin.
-Very thin.
539
00:19:56,930 --> 00:19:58,963
So hef has everybody
on a certain diet.
540
00:19:59,065 --> 00:20:00,565
This was such controlling...
541
00:20:00,667 --> 00:20:02,366
-Mm-hmm.
-...Behavior.
542
00:20:02,468 --> 00:20:04,835
♪♪♪
543
00:20:04,938 --> 00:20:06,938
[indistinct conversations]
544
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,373
we'd normally have our parties
every weekend.
545
00:20:09,475 --> 00:20:11,175
He'd would go upstairs
with crystal and say,
546
00:20:11,277 --> 00:20:13,144
"all right, have a good night.
Security's watching you,"
547
00:20:13,246 --> 00:20:15,913
and we got to stay down.
548
00:20:16,015 --> 00:20:18,182
We weren't allowed to be
with any friends
549
00:20:18,284 --> 00:20:21,752
that were not playboy circle.
550
00:20:21,854 --> 00:20:23,721
We kind of got a lot of press
551
00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:25,189
from hanging out
with all the people
552
00:20:25,291 --> 00:20:26,824
going onstage and dancing.
553
00:20:26,926 --> 00:20:28,593
We're very outgoing,
like running the party.
554
00:20:28,695 --> 00:20:30,728
We start being able
to meet people.
555
00:20:30,830 --> 00:20:32,029
Yeah.
556
00:20:32,131 --> 00:20:33,164
Like all
these different celebrities
557
00:20:33,266 --> 00:20:34,298
that you're meeting
and networking,
558
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,734
and like it's our backyard.
It is.
559
00:20:36,836 --> 00:20:38,836
And he found out we were hanging
out with some asian girl.
560
00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:40,171
He goes, "you're hanging out
with some asian girl.
561
00:20:40,273 --> 00:20:41,539
Is she a playmate?"
562
00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:43,741
and I'm like, "is there
a problem that she's asian?"
563
00:20:43,843 --> 00:20:45,042
and he's like,
"a playboy playmate, I told you,
564
00:20:45,144 --> 00:20:47,945
is a type of girl," and he goes,
565
00:20:48,047 --> 00:20:49,847
"you were hanging out
with black guys at the bar!"
566
00:20:49,949 --> 00:20:53,851
wait a minute. I thought he had
this image of being progressive.
567
00:20:53,953 --> 00:20:54,819
-Mm-hmm.
-Um...
568
00:20:54,921 --> 00:20:55,820
That's for his image.
569
00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:58,089
Yes, he's genius
about his image.
570
00:20:58,191 --> 00:21:01,993
Every woman he dated
was a white girl.
571
00:21:02,095 --> 00:21:07,198
Hef would say,
"all right, the twins are wild.
572
00:21:07,300 --> 00:21:09,500
When I'm going upstairs,
lock 'em up.
573
00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:11,936
I want them on hmh arrest
upstairs."
574
00:21:12,038 --> 00:21:12,870
hmh arrest?
575
00:21:12,972 --> 00:21:15,373
Hugh marston hefner.
Hmh arrest.
576
00:21:15,475 --> 00:21:17,942
-Yeah.
-He locked us in our bedroom.
577
00:21:18,044 --> 00:21:23,814
There would be a security guard
sitting outside of our door.
578
00:21:23,916 --> 00:21:25,616
You are locked in your rooms,
essentially.
579
00:21:25,718 --> 00:21:26,617
Mm-hmm.
580
00:21:26,719 --> 00:21:31,155
[indistinct conversations,
squealing]
581
00:21:31,257 --> 00:21:33,424
so when he'd play backgammon
every Sunday--Sunday funday--
582
00:21:33,526 --> 00:21:34,725
we had to lay next to him.
583
00:21:34,827 --> 00:21:37,194
The girls would come and ask
for photos all the time,
584
00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:38,829
that were invited up
for those days,
585
00:21:38,931 --> 00:21:40,598
and as he's going to take
the photos,
586
00:21:40,700 --> 00:21:43,067
he's, like, grabbing under,
grabbing their vagina,
587
00:21:43,169 --> 00:21:44,568
or, like, grabbed their boob,
588
00:21:44,671 --> 00:21:46,137
or they'd, "look!" and they'd
show their boobs to him,
589
00:21:46,239 --> 00:21:47,605
and he'd grab 'em.
590
00:21:47,707 --> 00:21:51,175
And the way he kisses, it's
like, um, his mouth kisses.
591
00:21:51,277 --> 00:21:54,945
He kissed every girl
like an open-mouth kiss.
592
00:21:55,048 --> 00:21:57,715
You guys, I went to the mansion
when I was 20 and 21.
593
00:21:57,817 --> 00:21:59,850
And I first met him
when I was 20.
594
00:21:59,952 --> 00:22:02,920
He came in for a, like,
an open-mouth kiss.
595
00:22:03,022 --> 00:22:05,222
And I went like this, and it was
like a dog slobber on me.
596
00:22:05,325 --> 00:22:06,991
-Mm-hmm.
-But I could tell
597
00:22:07,093 --> 00:22:08,793
he did not like
that I turned my head.
598
00:22:08,895 --> 00:22:10,261
-Turned.
-Mm-hmm.
599
00:22:10,363 --> 00:22:11,796
I remembered how repulsive
600
00:22:11,898 --> 00:22:13,698
it was to be
on the receiving end of that.
601
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:14,965
-Mm-hmm.
-I can't believe that you had
602
00:22:15,068 --> 00:22:18,135
to put up with that
as long as you did.
603
00:22:18,237 --> 00:22:20,037
[indistinct conversations]
604
00:22:20,139 --> 00:22:22,640
he has so much power.
It's like you're in a cult.
605
00:22:22,742 --> 00:22:26,711
The isolation that I had from
the outside world--it was...
606
00:22:26,813 --> 00:22:28,846
Not talking to our family, too.
607
00:22:28,948 --> 00:22:30,614
Not being able to talk
to my family.
608
00:22:30,717 --> 00:22:33,217
I wanted to go to church.
I couldn't go to church.
609
00:22:33,319 --> 00:22:35,319
I was a shell of a person,
you know?
610
00:22:35,421 --> 00:22:36,654
When we first got
to the playboy mansion,
611
00:22:36,756 --> 00:22:39,090
we were really, um, confident.
612
00:22:39,192 --> 00:22:41,392
Big personalities.
613
00:22:41,494 --> 00:22:42,660
You know, I felt like there
always was this bright light
614
00:22:42,762 --> 00:22:44,261
inside of us.
615
00:22:44,364 --> 00:22:47,565
Like, hef would say we used
to bounce in and out of a room.
616
00:22:47,667 --> 00:22:49,033
Very entertaining to all
of his friends and guests,
617
00:22:49,135 --> 00:22:51,302
and people used to say, "gosh,
well, when you guys got here,
618
00:22:51,404 --> 00:22:53,604
it was a fresh breath of air."
619
00:22:53,706 --> 00:22:56,540
so from the time
that you experienced
620
00:22:56,642 --> 00:22:59,143
that first night in his bedroom
at 19...
621
00:22:59,245 --> 00:23:00,745
-Mm-hmm.
-...Until the light went out
622
00:23:00,847 --> 00:23:03,114
was less than a year.
-Less than a year.
623
00:23:03,216 --> 00:23:05,816
And you had completely changed
personality.
624
00:23:05,918 --> 00:23:10,221
Yeah. I'm trying not to get
emotional thinking about it.
625
00:23:10,323 --> 00:23:13,157
You lose yourself being there.
626
00:23:13,259 --> 00:23:16,193
All that innocence about us
and all that, just being--
627
00:23:16,295 --> 00:23:18,662
losing that and becoming
a shell of a person,
628
00:23:18,765 --> 00:23:20,798
it--it's hard.
629
00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:24,235
It's like being in prison
and like someone breaking you
630
00:23:24,337 --> 00:23:27,304
in solitary confinement,
like, you're just broken.
631
00:23:27,407 --> 00:23:31,242
♪♪♪
632
00:23:31,344 --> 00:23:33,344
so you came to the mansion
thinking,
633
00:23:33,446 --> 00:23:37,081
"we're gonna be centerfolds.
I'm gonna be on a tv show.
634
00:23:37,183 --> 00:23:39,550
We're going to live
in the mansion,"
635
00:23:39,652 --> 00:23:43,487
but the reality was different
than the fantasy.
636
00:23:43,589 --> 00:23:48,659
You had rules.
You were watched constantly.
637
00:23:48,761 --> 00:23:50,294
And yet that wasn't
the worst thing
638
00:23:50,396 --> 00:23:53,431
that happened to you, was it?
639
00:23:57,703 --> 00:24:00,738
We did stop having sex with him
when the std hit.
640
00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:03,507
So for the first time,
we put our foot down,
641
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:06,677
and hef was pressuring us
to hook up with him.
642
00:24:06,779 --> 00:24:08,846
So then mary o'connor suggested,
"well, hef,
643
00:24:08,948 --> 00:24:11,415
why don't you stay
with the three girls, then?"
644
00:24:11,517 --> 00:24:13,083
and he's never done that.
645
00:24:13,186 --> 00:24:14,885
He's used to seven girls,
nine girls,
646
00:24:14,987 --> 00:24:16,854
but he actually agreed to that.
647
00:24:16,956 --> 00:24:19,123
So then we're like, "oh, great,
now he agreed to it.
648
00:24:19,225 --> 00:24:21,559
Now we're gonna have to,
like, end up having
649
00:24:21,661 --> 00:24:23,160
to hook up with him."
650
00:24:23,262 --> 00:24:24,528
this was like
a business arrangement.
651
00:24:24,630 --> 00:24:25,796
-Mm-hmm.
-It was--it's like
652
00:24:25,898 --> 00:24:27,398
a business arrangement, yeah.
653
00:24:27,500 --> 00:24:28,732
Did you feel like you would
lose the opportunity
654
00:24:28,835 --> 00:24:31,836
to be on the show
if you would have said no?
655
00:24:31,938 --> 00:24:33,938
It wasn't just about the show.
656
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:35,272
We thought he would
just send us back.
657
00:24:35,374 --> 00:24:38,042
Like, he would take everything
away that we had got.
658
00:24:38,144 --> 00:24:39,810
Taking away the allowance,
you know,
659
00:24:39,912 --> 00:24:42,413
and not being able to take
care of our grandmother.
660
00:24:42,515 --> 00:24:45,182
We did not want him
to take that away.
661
00:24:45,284 --> 00:24:48,586
I was young and naive. You don't
know you're allowed to say no.
662
00:24:48,688 --> 00:24:52,456
And so you were kind of pulled
back into this dark place...
663
00:24:52,558 --> 00:24:53,624
-Yeah.
-...Of--of having
664
00:24:53,726 --> 00:24:56,760
to go upstairs,
go into his bedroom,
665
00:24:56,863 --> 00:24:58,262
and have sexual intercourse
with him.
666
00:24:58,364 --> 00:25:00,197
-Yeah.
-We ended up doing it, like,
667
00:25:00,299 --> 00:25:02,633
two more times and then just
said we couldn't do it anymore.
668
00:25:02,735 --> 00:25:05,870
And that's how later on,
I ended up getting pregnant.
669
00:25:05,972 --> 00:25:08,272
♪♪♪
670
00:25:08,374 --> 00:25:10,474
one of those two times,
you got pregnant.
671
00:25:10,576 --> 00:25:11,742
Mm-hmm.
672
00:25:11,844 --> 00:25:15,179
You know, he's having sex
with you unprotected.
673
00:25:15,281 --> 00:25:17,248
Um, you know,
you were old enough
674
00:25:17,350 --> 00:25:18,883
to know how people get pregnant.
675
00:25:18,985 --> 00:25:20,217
I didn't think that I would
676
00:25:20,319 --> 00:25:22,186
because I knew holly was
trying to get pregnant,
677
00:25:22,288 --> 00:25:25,422
and I knew that holly tried
so hard,
678
00:25:25,525 --> 00:25:27,658
so I was like,
maybe we're in the clear.
679
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:29,159
-Didn't think it was possible.
-I didn't think it was possible.
680
00:25:29,262 --> 00:25:30,628
And again, how old is he?
681
00:25:30,730 --> 00:25:31,929
-84.
-84.
682
00:25:32,031 --> 00:25:33,731
Like, you don't really think
that would happen.
683
00:25:33,833 --> 00:25:34,865
But we were--we were about
the youngest girlfriends
684
00:25:34,967 --> 00:25:37,001
he had had.
685
00:25:37,103 --> 00:25:39,303
It was the end of 19.
I was gonna turn 20.
686
00:25:39,405 --> 00:25:41,705
I had no idea
until the blood test
687
00:25:41,807 --> 00:25:44,775
for my surgery, so a blood test
is what told me.
688
00:25:44,877 --> 00:25:48,746
We had plans to get our noses
done and our boobs done.
689
00:25:48,848 --> 00:25:52,016
So I got a call saying, like,
"hey, you're pregnant,
690
00:25:52,118 --> 00:25:54,418
and you have the surgery
coming up," and that's--
691
00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:57,721
I freaked. Like, I'm, like,
"who else knows about this?"
692
00:25:57,823 --> 00:25:58,756
and they're like,
"well, we just called you,"
693
00:25:58,858 --> 00:26:01,292
and I was like,
"don't call mary.
694
00:26:01,394 --> 00:26:03,227
Don't call hef.
Don't call anyone.
695
00:26:03,329 --> 00:26:04,662
I don't want anyone knowing."
696
00:26:04,764 --> 00:26:06,163
it's hard to hide things
at the mansion.
697
00:26:06,265 --> 00:26:08,432
Wait. The first reaction
that you had...
698
00:26:08,534 --> 00:26:10,067
-Was scared.
-...Was "who knows?"
699
00:26:10,169 --> 00:26:12,236
who knows?
Who in the office knows?
700
00:26:12,338 --> 00:26:14,638
Why didn't you feel like you
could go to hugh hefner
701
00:26:14,740 --> 00:26:16,607
and say, "hef, I'm pregnant"?
702
00:26:16,709 --> 00:26:19,843
I didn't want him to know
that I was pregnant.
703
00:26:19,946 --> 00:26:21,512
I didn't want him to want me
to have it.
704
00:26:21,614 --> 00:26:26,183
I didn't wanna be stuck
even more inside that bubble.
705
00:26:26,285 --> 00:26:28,619
I think it's a way for him
to control me even more...
706
00:26:28,721 --> 00:26:30,688
-I see.
-...Having me on a leash.
707
00:26:30,790 --> 00:26:32,323
Yeah.
708
00:26:32,425 --> 00:26:33,891
I felt disgusted with my body.
I didn't--
709
00:26:33,993 --> 00:26:37,695
I felt like there was something,
like, like, an alien inside me.
710
00:26:37,797 --> 00:26:39,263
I was just grossed out.
711
00:26:39,365 --> 00:26:43,100
[voice breaking] I just wanted
to get it over and done with,
712
00:26:43,202 --> 00:26:44,134
and... [sighs]
713
00:26:44,236 --> 00:26:45,903
I called around
for a few clinics.
714
00:26:46,005 --> 00:26:47,037
And, um,
'cause we didn't wanna--
715
00:26:47,139 --> 00:26:49,306
'cause security
couldn't take us there
716
00:26:49,408 --> 00:26:50,841
'cause otherwise
hef would've found out.
717
00:26:50,943 --> 00:26:53,110
Um, 'cause if we were together,
I knew we would get a...
718
00:26:53,212 --> 00:26:55,179
A lot more attention
or a chance of paparazzi
719
00:26:55,281 --> 00:26:57,314
walking in an abortion clinic.
720
00:26:57,416 --> 00:27:00,584
You two do everything together,
721
00:27:00,686 --> 00:27:03,520
but at this crucial moment
in your life,
722
00:27:03,623 --> 00:27:08,325
you have to walk in alone 'cause
you're worried about paparazzi.
723
00:27:08,427 --> 00:27:11,795
That is, to me,
so gut-wrenching and sad.
724
00:27:11,897 --> 00:27:13,230
-Yeah.
-You had to be alone.
725
00:27:13,332 --> 00:27:15,532
-[exhales deeply]
-I'm so sorry.
726
00:27:15,635 --> 00:27:18,469
I can't imagine what
the two of you went through.
727
00:27:18,571 --> 00:27:19,770
That's a double life.
728
00:27:19,872 --> 00:27:21,605
That's why we love each other
so much, too.
729
00:27:21,707 --> 00:27:24,174
We really are strong
for each other, you know?
730
00:27:24,276 --> 00:27:25,809
Yeah, you are.
731
00:27:25,911 --> 00:27:29,446
So, uh, I called my good friend
juicy j from--
732
00:27:29,548 --> 00:27:30,814
he's a rapper
from three 6 mafia,
733
00:27:30,916 --> 00:27:32,983
but we're really close.
734
00:27:33,085 --> 00:27:37,054
So I made an appointment, and we
went to sherman oaks mall,
735
00:27:37,156 --> 00:27:38,956
got dropped off and said
we were going shopping,
736
00:27:39,058 --> 00:27:41,792
and juicy j picked us up
at valet right away,
737
00:27:41,894 --> 00:27:44,728
drove us in his car, and we
dropped karissa off by herself.
738
00:27:44,830 --> 00:27:48,132
I did the procedure, came out,
got in his car,
739
00:27:48,234 --> 00:27:50,300
and they dropped us back off
at the mall,
740
00:27:50,403 --> 00:27:52,202
and she ran up and purchased,
like, two thongs
741
00:27:52,304 --> 00:27:54,938
from victoria's secret
to act like we went shopping.
742
00:27:55,041 --> 00:27:56,607
Then we went back
to the mansion,
743
00:27:56,709 --> 00:27:58,409
and then all of a sudden,
hef's like,
744
00:27:58,511 --> 00:28:00,144
"oh, we have to film
745
00:28:00,246 --> 00:28:02,179
for 'the girls next door' promo
opening."
746
00:28:02,281 --> 00:28:04,448
I think it was like
two days later, maybe.
747
00:28:04,550 --> 00:28:06,884
And they wanted us for
that opening to be in bikinis
748
00:28:06,986 --> 00:28:08,719
and all this stuff,
and I couldn't go down there
749
00:28:08,821 --> 00:28:11,755
'cause my stomach was swollen
and I was bleeding a lot.
750
00:28:11,857 --> 00:28:14,525
I just, uh, laid in bed and
tried to play like I was sick.
751
00:28:14,627 --> 00:28:17,895
And then lauren,
our main field producer,
752
00:28:17,997 --> 00:28:19,730
shuts the door and says,
"what's going on?"
753
00:28:19,832 --> 00:28:21,231
I had to tell someone.
754
00:28:21,333 --> 00:28:24,168
Kristina says,
"karissa just had an abortion."
755
00:28:24,270 --> 00:28:28,205
and lauren, thank god,
she didn't say anything.
756
00:28:28,307 --> 00:28:30,340
But she did say, "well, what do
you want me to tell hef?"
757
00:28:30,443 --> 00:28:32,276
so then hef comes up,
and I'm crying,
758
00:28:32,378 --> 00:28:33,911
and he's like, "what's wrong?"
759
00:28:34,013 --> 00:28:36,046
I said, "I'm sick.
I just can't film."
760
00:28:36,148 --> 00:28:38,282
he's like,
"well, we could do it tomorrow."
761
00:28:38,384 --> 00:28:39,616
and I said, "no,"
'cause I don't know
762
00:28:39,719 --> 00:28:41,251
if I'm gonna be all right
by tomorrow.
763
00:28:41,353 --> 00:28:42,419
So hef's like,
"whatever you wanna do,"
764
00:28:42,521 --> 00:28:45,189
and, like, leaves, all mad,
765
00:28:45,291 --> 00:28:47,257
and then that's the first time
we've said no.
766
00:28:47,359 --> 00:28:49,093
We never say no to filming.
767
00:28:49,195 --> 00:28:50,694
Lauren said, "all right,
how about this, karissa?
768
00:28:50,796 --> 00:28:53,497
You do your hair and makeup
and go down,
769
00:28:53,599 --> 00:28:55,532
and we will cut--put your head
on your sister's body
770
00:28:55,634 --> 00:28:58,168
if she's okay with it."
771
00:28:58,270 --> 00:29:02,573
so, yeah, um,
and then this opening,
772
00:29:02,675 --> 00:29:06,977
my head--it's kristina's body.
My head's put on her body.
773
00:29:07,079 --> 00:29:08,278
I was the body double
for both of us.
774
00:29:08,380 --> 00:29:09,913
She was the body double
for both of us
775
00:29:10,015 --> 00:29:11,548
this day of the shoot
for the opening.
776
00:29:11,650 --> 00:29:15,252
[voice breaking] I went down
and put on different bikinis.
777
00:29:15,354 --> 00:29:18,889
And...That's the opening for
"the girls next door"
778
00:29:18,991 --> 00:29:20,824
and the bobblehead thing.
779
00:29:20,926 --> 00:29:23,427
I mean, in a way, you were
almost more concerned
780
00:29:23,529 --> 00:29:27,064
about this reality show opening
781
00:29:27,166 --> 00:29:29,600
than you were about
your own body and health.
782
00:29:29,702 --> 00:29:33,537
[crying] so...It's hard watching
the opening for it.
783
00:29:33,639 --> 00:29:34,705
[sniffles]
784
00:29:34,807 --> 00:29:38,575
the fact that you were pregnant
by somebody
785
00:29:38,677 --> 00:29:40,277
that you didn't
wanna have sex with...
786
00:29:40,379 --> 00:29:44,314
Every time I've done it with him
it's assault.
787
00:29:44,416 --> 00:29:48,852
I'm ni--I'm a kid.
I'm 19 years old.
788
00:29:48,954 --> 00:29:51,188
I'm not even old enough
to drink yet.
789
00:29:51,290 --> 00:29:56,326
And he is just a creepy old man
with power.
790
00:29:56,428 --> 00:29:59,630
Women don't understand that
they can say no. [sniffles]
791
00:29:59,732 --> 00:30:04,501
I'm sorry. It's so hard
to talk about, you know?
792
00:30:04,603 --> 00:30:07,571
Do you look back
and think to yourself
793
00:30:07,673 --> 00:30:09,506
that you made
the right decision?
794
00:30:09,608 --> 00:30:11,508
100% I did, yeah.
795
00:30:11,610 --> 00:30:13,243
Everyone, to each their own...
796
00:30:13,345 --> 00:30:16,847
But for me it's like rape.
797
00:30:16,949 --> 00:30:18,348
He would use control mechanisms
798
00:30:18,450 --> 00:30:19,783
completely
throughout everything,
799
00:30:19,885 --> 00:30:22,586
so I'm happy that I had
the abortion.
800
00:30:22,688 --> 00:30:24,321
Because you felt like
he raped you.
801
00:30:24,423 --> 00:30:25,355
Yeah.
802
00:30:25,457 --> 00:30:27,624
♪♪♪
803
00:30:30,296 --> 00:30:31,628
[paparazzi shouting at once]
804
00:30:31,730 --> 00:30:33,997
you know, while we were there,
we also had a lot of opportunity
805
00:30:34,099 --> 00:30:35,899
besides being
"playboy" playmates.
806
00:30:36,001 --> 00:30:37,734
Like, movies, commercials.
807
00:30:37,837 --> 00:30:40,103
We did the "guitar hero"
commercial with brett ratner.
808
00:30:40,206 --> 00:30:41,271
We've done l'oréal France.
809
00:30:41,373 --> 00:30:45,175
We've done, like,
just tons of stuff,
810
00:30:45,277 --> 00:30:47,644
and we did the "somewhere"
with sofia coppola.
811
00:30:47,746 --> 00:30:50,581
Can you tell me how you got
that role in that film?
812
00:30:50,683 --> 00:30:53,650
Sofia coppola contacted
the mansion.
813
00:30:53,752 --> 00:30:55,786
They asked us,
"hey, we have a part..."
814
00:30:55,888 --> 00:30:57,221
"do you want to come audition?"
815
00:30:57,323 --> 00:30:58,255
"...We want you guys to come
and audition for."
816
00:30:58,357 --> 00:30:59,356
-she said--
-and then you got it.
817
00:30:59,458 --> 00:31:00,991
Both: Yeah, we got it.
818
00:31:01,093 --> 00:31:03,126
And hef was shocked. So they
made a whole episode about it.
819
00:31:06,265 --> 00:31:08,465
Thanks for having us.
820
00:31:16,108 --> 00:31:17,441
Oh, yeah.
821
00:31:17,543 --> 00:31:19,843
-Oh.
-"fan of your father."
822
00:31:19,945 --> 00:31:23,280
she's so uncomfortable. Like,
he gave a backhanded compliment.
823
00:31:23,382 --> 00:31:25,415
It was almost like
he was groveling to her.
824
00:31:25,517 --> 00:31:26,617
Both: Yeah.
825
00:31:26,719 --> 00:31:28,218
Clearly,
he really loves celebrities.
826
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:29,786
-It comes with movies.
-Yeah, he loves movies.
827
00:31:29,889 --> 00:31:31,288
-It's a big deal.
-It's movies.
828
00:31:31,390 --> 00:31:32,756
I'll tell you,
this was the thing.
829
00:31:32,858 --> 00:31:35,859
When our, uh, red carpet came
for the premiere,
830
00:31:35,961 --> 00:31:37,661
for the movie,
we didn't want him to go,
831
00:31:37,763 --> 00:31:40,230
'cause I knew it was gonna be
more about him,
832
00:31:40,332 --> 00:31:41,932
and he was gonna bring
other women
833
00:31:42,034 --> 00:31:45,002
and make it more about them,
and to us, this was, like,
834
00:31:45,104 --> 00:31:47,437
our--we did this.
We got this on our own.
835
00:31:47,539 --> 00:31:49,740
Can we have this to ourselves?
836
00:31:49,842 --> 00:31:50,974
And so we told him
837
00:31:51,076 --> 00:31:52,442
we didn't want him
to come to the premiere,
838
00:31:52,544 --> 00:31:55,379
and he said, "well, I'll send
you with security in a limo,
839
00:31:55,481 --> 00:31:56,380
but you have to do movie night."
840
00:31:56,482 --> 00:31:58,348
"you have to stay
for movie night..."
841
00:31:58,450 --> 00:31:59,783
-and dinner.
-"...And dinner as normal."
842
00:31:59,885 --> 00:32:01,285
and this was what was
embarrassing.
843
00:32:01,387 --> 00:32:04,521
By the time the movie ended,
we jumped up, got in the limo,
844
00:32:04,623 --> 00:32:06,657
and by the time we got
to the premiere,
845
00:32:06,759 --> 00:32:10,027
it was already halfway through
the beginning of the movie.
846
00:32:10,129 --> 00:32:11,194
Sofia was waiting for us.
847
00:32:11,297 --> 00:32:12,863
He made you miss
your premiere...
848
00:32:12,965 --> 00:32:13,964
-Both: Yeah.
-...And the red carpet
849
00:32:14,066 --> 00:32:15,299
of your premiere.
-Both: Yep.
850
00:32:15,401 --> 00:32:16,466
-So when--
-was he jealous?
851
00:32:16,568 --> 00:32:17,901
-100% he was jealous.
-It was like
852
00:32:18,003 --> 00:32:19,236
he's now losing control
of you, too,
853
00:32:19,338 --> 00:32:22,406
'cause you're out there starting
to make your own career.
854
00:32:22,508 --> 00:32:23,640
Yep.
855
00:32:23,742 --> 00:32:24,574
And it's almost like
he couldn't handle it.
856
00:32:24,677 --> 00:32:26,310
Yeah.
857
00:32:26,412 --> 00:32:28,578
He's actually made a lot
of money off of us
858
00:32:28,681 --> 00:32:31,114
from just us living there.
859
00:32:31,216 --> 00:32:33,850
He really resented the success
of the other girls that left,
860
00:32:33,953 --> 00:32:36,653
and he didn't want us to leave.
861
00:32:36,755 --> 00:32:40,023
Let's talk about
how you were able,
862
00:32:40,125 --> 00:32:43,794
and I'm gonna use this word,
escape.
863
00:32:43,896 --> 00:32:45,062
We actually were scared.
864
00:32:45,164 --> 00:32:46,863
We didn't know how
to break up with him,
865
00:32:46,966 --> 00:32:48,231
so we went
to mary o'connor's office
866
00:32:48,334 --> 00:32:50,467
and told her we didn't
wanna be there anymore
867
00:32:50,569 --> 00:32:53,737
but didn't know how
to tell hef that.
868
00:32:53,839 --> 00:32:56,440
It was like an hour goes by
and then she calls us,
869
00:32:56,542 --> 00:32:57,808
and says, "hey, uh, come--
you girls come down here.
870
00:32:57,910 --> 00:32:59,943
I've got hef in here,"
and we were scared."
871
00:33:00,045 --> 00:33:02,045
-mm-hmm.
-He was pissed.
872
00:33:02,147 --> 00:33:05,082
He said, "okay, so you guys
wanna break up with me?"
873
00:33:05,184 --> 00:33:07,684
and we're like, "yeah."
874
00:33:07,786 --> 00:33:11,054
he said, "well, how about you go
and live at the bunny house?"
875
00:33:11,156 --> 00:33:13,323
hef had a lot of the girls
staying at the bunny house,
876
00:33:13,425 --> 00:33:15,759
which was across the street
from the mansion,
877
00:33:15,861 --> 00:33:19,963
and he said, "I'll give you guys
$500 a week rather than $1,000.
878
00:33:20,065 --> 00:33:21,098
-"you have to attend..."
-attend.
879
00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:22,833
Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.
880
00:33:22,935 --> 00:33:26,670
We agreed, but the first night,
we went out to a, um, nightclub.
881
00:33:26,772 --> 00:33:28,438
He saw that we were getting
a lot of press,
882
00:33:28,540 --> 00:33:30,741
and he did not like it, and--
883
00:33:30,843 --> 00:33:32,976
so he said, "you stay here
at the mansion,
884
00:33:33,078 --> 00:33:34,511
and you can't be seen out,
885
00:33:34,613 --> 00:33:36,913
or you guys have to leave
the playmate house,"
886
00:33:37,016 --> 00:33:40,784
and we're like, you know what?
That's great for us,
887
00:33:40,886 --> 00:33:43,253
'cause we just got a taste
of freedom.
888
00:33:45,624 --> 00:33:48,658
♪♪♪
889
00:33:57,736 --> 00:34:00,003
it felt so weird, uh,
going in a grocery store
890
00:34:00,105 --> 00:34:02,305
and just buying groceries.
891
00:34:02,408 --> 00:34:03,607
We just wanted to be adults,
892
00:34:03,709 --> 00:34:05,609
figure out who we are as adults
and as women,
893
00:34:05,711 --> 00:34:07,644
'cause we weren't even women
when we moved in.
894
00:34:07,746 --> 00:34:09,813
We decided to open our own
full-service beauty salon
895
00:34:09,915 --> 00:34:13,583
in beverly hills, and we did
do that for three years
896
00:34:13,685 --> 00:34:15,819
and then sold it.
897
00:34:15,921 --> 00:34:18,655
After you left the mansion,
what was your emotional state?
898
00:34:18,757 --> 00:34:22,025
We were diagnosed with ptsd,
899
00:34:22,127 --> 00:34:24,461
and the psychiatrist said that
we would need to go through
900
00:34:24,563 --> 00:34:25,929
a lot of therapy
to unravel our brain.
901
00:34:26,031 --> 00:34:28,065
-Unwind our brain.
-Unwind our brain.
902
00:34:28,167 --> 00:34:31,501
Can you describe why and how
that has affected your life?
903
00:34:31,603 --> 00:34:34,237
-We're still dealing with it.
-We're still dealing with it.
904
00:34:34,339 --> 00:34:39,276
Yeah. I don't think that that
part is ever gonna go away--
905
00:34:39,378 --> 00:34:42,245
that part of us that was taken
will ever go away.
906
00:34:42,347 --> 00:34:45,015
And our mother passed away
in 2014.
907
00:34:45,117 --> 00:34:46,650
And so when she was gone,
908
00:34:46,752 --> 00:34:48,885
it was like it just
took everything away,
909
00:34:48,987 --> 00:34:50,554
'cause she was all we ever had.
910
00:34:50,656 --> 00:34:52,789
So you didn't have
a biological family
911
00:34:52,891 --> 00:34:54,491
at that point
once your grandmother passed.
912
00:34:54,593 --> 00:34:56,093
You didn't have
your playboy family anymore
913
00:34:56,195 --> 00:34:59,029
because you left.
-Mm-hmm.
914
00:34:59,131 --> 00:35:02,466
And so what did you wanna do
with the rest of your lives?
915
00:35:02,568 --> 00:35:04,167
I think we're still figuring
everything out.
916
00:35:04,269 --> 00:35:05,669
Yeah.
917
00:35:05,771 --> 00:35:06,536
We still are gonna work
in therapy.
918
00:35:06,638 --> 00:35:08,138
Mm-hmm.
919
00:35:08,240 --> 00:35:10,907
We do wanna have a family
of our own,
920
00:35:11,009 --> 00:35:13,643
but we need to get
to the right space first.
921
00:35:13,745 --> 00:35:16,480
Have you been able to date
since hugh hefner?
922
00:35:19,952 --> 00:35:21,284
Not serious dating.
923
00:35:21,386 --> 00:35:25,555
We can't emotionally...Connect
like that.
924
00:35:25,657 --> 00:35:27,891
Did you ever go back
and see hef again?
925
00:35:27,993 --> 00:35:29,759
When we heard he was, like,
not doing good,
926
00:35:29,862 --> 00:35:32,362
went up for a movie night,
like, at the end.
927
00:35:32,464 --> 00:35:33,864
We saw him in a walker.
928
00:35:33,966 --> 00:35:35,832
At this point,
he's peeing in a bucket
929
00:35:35,934 --> 00:35:37,567
next to the bed.
-Nightstand.
930
00:35:37,669 --> 00:35:41,471
He couldn't walk.
Yeah, his health was bad.
931
00:35:41,573 --> 00:35:43,006
Did you pity him?
932
00:35:43,108 --> 00:35:45,909
I don't understand completely,
933
00:35:46,011 --> 00:35:49,679
but a part of me
does feel bad.
934
00:35:49,781 --> 00:35:53,083
So it's like we wouldn't wish
the worst on anyone.
935
00:35:53,185 --> 00:35:55,585
♪♪♪
936
00:35:55,687 --> 00:35:57,654
-people are gonna see this.
-Mm-hmm.
937
00:35:57,756 --> 00:36:00,891
And they're gonna say,
"the twins became famous.
938
00:36:00,993 --> 00:36:03,827
The twins were centerfolds.
939
00:36:03,929 --> 00:36:05,529
The twins got to live
in the mansion.
940
00:36:05,631 --> 00:36:07,130
They got to live this life.
941
00:36:07,232 --> 00:36:09,032
Now they're coming forward
after the dude's dead."
942
00:36:09,134 --> 00:36:10,200
both: Mm-hmm.
943
00:36:10,302 --> 00:36:12,202
Is that fair?
944
00:36:12,304 --> 00:36:15,472
But when we were staying there,
he had a powerhouse behind him.
945
00:36:15,574 --> 00:36:17,541
He had a whole team--
he had a whole team behind him.
946
00:36:17,643 --> 00:36:19,376
He can hide anything.
You can't even touch him.
947
00:36:19,478 --> 00:36:21,778
-He felt untouchable.
-So he felt untouchable.
948
00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:23,747
He's squeaky clean. Untouchable.
949
00:36:23,849 --> 00:36:27,117
I didn't know
how much power we had
950
00:36:27,219 --> 00:36:28,785
as young adults at 19.
951
00:36:28,887 --> 00:36:35,158
Like, we had a lot more power,
but we didn't know.
952
00:36:35,260 --> 00:36:38,094
Coming up,
dr. Kate balestrieri
953
00:36:38,197 --> 00:36:42,499
will talk to us about backlash
and moving forward.
954
00:36:45,804 --> 00:36:47,671
♪♪♪
955
00:36:47,773 --> 00:36:51,875
talking about hugh hefner,
he has a legacy,
956
00:36:51,977 --> 00:36:53,710
and people still exist
that propped him up...
957
00:36:53,812 --> 00:36:55,478
-Mm-hmm.
-...All those years.
958
00:36:55,581 --> 00:36:56,947
What would you like
those people to know...
959
00:36:57,049 --> 00:36:57,881
-The truth.
-...About how you feel
960
00:36:57,983 --> 00:36:59,549
about the legacy?
961
00:36:59,651 --> 00:37:01,851
He had a lot of power.
It's a new...
962
00:37:01,954 --> 00:37:04,254
We're in a new era. We're in
a new generation right now.
963
00:37:04,356 --> 00:37:05,222
We're in a new world.
964
00:37:05,324 --> 00:37:07,257
When the me too movement
came out,
965
00:37:07,359 --> 00:37:10,093
it, like, kind of opened
the floodgates for...
966
00:37:10,195 --> 00:37:11,294
-For a lot of women.
-...For us to be able to talk
967
00:37:11,396 --> 00:37:13,530
and know that we're not alone
in the situations
968
00:37:13,632 --> 00:37:14,664
we were all going through.
969
00:37:14,766 --> 00:37:17,467
-We have a voice.
-Mm-hmm.
970
00:37:17,569 --> 00:37:19,569
♪♪♪
971
00:37:19,671 --> 00:37:23,139
we so appreciate you opening up
and telling us your story.
972
00:37:23,242 --> 00:37:25,809
We know that it's painful.
We saw how painful it was.
973
00:37:25,911 --> 00:37:27,911
I felt how painful
this was for you.
974
00:37:28,013 --> 00:37:33,250
The story has been so powerful
and really troubling.
975
00:37:33,352 --> 00:37:35,719
We brought out dr. Kate because
we want her to be able
976
00:37:35,821 --> 00:37:38,989
to process some of the things
that you are
977
00:37:39,091 --> 00:37:40,390
possibly experiencing right now
as you're telling your story
978
00:37:40,492 --> 00:37:43,727
for the very first time.
Dr. Kate.
979
00:37:43,829 --> 00:37:45,862
Well, hearing everything
that you've been through,
980
00:37:45,964 --> 00:37:48,898
I really want to echo how brave
and courageous it is
981
00:37:49,001 --> 00:37:51,201
for you to come forward
and talk about everything
982
00:37:51,303 --> 00:37:52,502
that you have endured.
983
00:37:52,604 --> 00:37:54,971
This isn't easy for survivors
to do,
984
00:37:55,073 --> 00:37:56,906
and I hope that both of you
985
00:37:57,009 --> 00:37:59,209
hold a lot of compassion
for yourselves
986
00:37:59,311 --> 00:38:02,746
as you start to unpack
all of this.
987
00:38:02,848 --> 00:38:06,349
Do you feel better now
than you did this morning?
988
00:38:06,451 --> 00:38:07,851
-100%.
-Yeah.
989
00:38:07,953 --> 00:38:09,252
-I feel better...
-Yeah.
990
00:38:09,354 --> 00:38:10,287
...Telling our story.
991
00:38:10,389 --> 00:38:12,555
-It's a lot to process, too.
-Yeah.
992
00:38:12,658 --> 00:38:14,324
Like, I'll probably go to bed
tonight thinking,
993
00:38:14,426 --> 00:38:16,459
oh, my gosh, and I'm gonna,
like, you know,
994
00:38:16,561 --> 00:38:18,595
I'm just gonna probably rethink
the whole day and everything,
995
00:38:18,697 --> 00:38:21,464
just to probably have anxiety,
but...'cause it's hard.
996
00:38:21,566 --> 00:38:23,466
-Of course it is.
-It's hard to talk about.
997
00:38:23,568 --> 00:38:25,835
Well, sometimes when people
talk about the trauma
998
00:38:25,937 --> 00:38:27,137
that they've gone through,
999
00:38:27,239 --> 00:38:29,939
they can experience
an emotional hangover.
1000
00:38:30,042 --> 00:38:31,775
-An emotional hangover.
-That's amazing.
1001
00:38:31,877 --> 00:38:33,109
-It is, yeah.
-I was just gonna say...
1002
00:38:33,211 --> 00:38:34,844
-Emotional hangover.
-...Emotional hangover.
1003
00:38:34,946 --> 00:38:36,646
-That's what...
-It's to be expected.
1004
00:38:36,748 --> 00:38:39,215
And I might encourage you
to think about
1005
00:38:39,318 --> 00:38:40,884
getting a lot of support
in the next couple of days.
1006
00:38:40,986 --> 00:38:43,853
You know, can you call
the people you love and trust
1007
00:38:43,955 --> 00:38:45,588
and say, "hey, can you bring us
some soup?
1008
00:38:45,691 --> 00:38:47,090
Can you bring us thai food?"
1009
00:38:47,192 --> 00:38:50,660
how do you like to be nurtured,
and can you ask for that?
1010
00:38:50,762 --> 00:38:52,262
-I'll do that for you.
-Thank you.
1011
00:38:52,364 --> 00:38:53,596
[laughter]
1012
00:38:53,699 --> 00:38:55,765
also, I think it's
really important that if
1013
00:38:55,867 --> 00:38:58,301
there's a part of you
that wants to process
1014
00:38:58,403 --> 00:39:00,270
how this special is received,
1015
00:39:00,372 --> 00:39:02,839
maybe ask a friend
to read social media for you
1016
00:39:02,941 --> 00:39:05,642
and give it to you
through a filter
1017
00:39:05,744 --> 00:39:07,811
so that you're not seeing
those images
1018
00:39:07,913 --> 00:39:09,412
of what people have typed,
1019
00:39:09,514 --> 00:39:11,214
'cause that can lead us
down a rabbit hole
1020
00:39:11,316 --> 00:39:14,417
of being constantly
in a state of injury,
1021
00:39:14,519 --> 00:39:16,920
and we see the effects of that
on social media all the time
1022
00:39:17,022 --> 00:39:18,988
with people taking
their own lives
1023
00:39:19,091 --> 00:39:22,759
and people have significant
ptsd, anxiety, and depression.
1024
00:39:22,861 --> 00:39:24,894
The other problem with writing
something snarky about somebody
1025
00:39:24,996 --> 00:39:27,030
that you see on tv
1026
00:39:27,132 --> 00:39:28,498
is that other people
are reading that tweet
1027
00:39:28,600 --> 00:39:32,669
or that post as well,
and that has a silencing effect
1028
00:39:32,771 --> 00:39:35,105
on other women that might be
considering coming forward.
1029
00:39:35,207 --> 00:39:36,773
It absolutely does.
1030
00:39:36,875 --> 00:39:40,310
It also creates a secondary
victimization for survivors.
1031
00:39:40,412 --> 00:39:41,678
So when survivors
are not believed,
1032
00:39:41,780 --> 00:39:44,414
when survivors are ridiculed,
when they're harassed,
1033
00:39:44,516 --> 00:39:47,150
that compounds the trauma
that they've experienced.
1034
00:39:47,252 --> 00:39:49,152
I mean, honestly, that's why
I'm impressed with you,
1035
00:39:49,254 --> 00:39:51,955
because you've decided
to come forward and share
1036
00:39:52,057 --> 00:39:54,357
these really traumatic
experiences,
1037
00:39:54,459 --> 00:39:55,959
and you are such heroes
for doing that.
1038
00:39:56,061 --> 00:39:57,727
-Thank you.
-Because you'll never know
1039
00:39:57,829 --> 00:39:59,996
who you are impacting
right this second.
1040
00:40:00,098 --> 00:40:01,531
What would you wanna say
to the other women
1041
00:40:01,633 --> 00:40:03,466
that have endured what you have?
1042
00:40:03,568 --> 00:40:04,667
They're not alone, yeah.
1043
00:40:04,770 --> 00:40:06,102
And it helps to be able
to tell our story,
1044
00:40:06,204 --> 00:40:08,004
but it is a healing process.
1045
00:40:08,106 --> 00:40:11,441
I just appreciate the women
that are coming forward.
1046
00:40:11,543 --> 00:40:12,942
I appreciate hearing it.
1047
00:40:13,044 --> 00:40:14,511
We didn't just go through it
ourselves.
1048
00:40:14,613 --> 00:40:15,545
It's a dark sisterhood,
1049
00:40:15,647 --> 00:40:17,313
but it's a lot of healing
we gotta do,
1050
00:40:17,416 --> 00:40:19,749
so it's just gonna take time.
1051
00:40:19,851 --> 00:40:21,284
I am so thankful
1052
00:40:21,386 --> 00:40:24,521
that you wanted to come here
and share your experiences
1053
00:40:24,623 --> 00:40:26,923
because they matter.
-Thank you.
1054
00:40:27,025 --> 00:40:28,124
-And the truth matters.
-Thank you.
1055
00:40:28,226 --> 00:40:29,692
-And I believe you.
-Thank you very much.
1056
00:40:29,795 --> 00:40:31,161
Thank you.
1057
00:40:31,263 --> 00:40:36,433
♪♪♪
1058
00:40:36,535 --> 00:40:38,067
thank you for joining us.
1059
00:40:38,170 --> 00:40:40,103
This series was about
providing a space
1060
00:40:40,205 --> 00:40:43,673
for women to come forward
and tell their stories...
1061
00:40:43,775 --> 00:40:45,041
Okay.
1062
00:40:45,143 --> 00:40:47,143
...And bringing those stories
to an audience
1063
00:40:47,245 --> 00:40:48,378
who was ready to listen.
1064
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:50,880
We wanna thank
our brave contributors
1065
00:40:50,982 --> 00:40:52,816
and thank you for listening.
1066
00:40:52,918 --> 00:40:55,919
♪♪♪
1067
00:41:15,240 --> 00:41:17,440
next week
on "secrets of playboy,"
1068
00:41:17,542 --> 00:41:19,542
the whistleblowers reunite,
1069
00:41:19,644 --> 00:41:22,178
and a new survivor
comes forward.
1070
00:41:22,280 --> 00:41:24,747
The fairy tale
turned into a nightmare.
1071
00:41:24,850 --> 00:41:29,486
It went from being fun
to being abusive.
1072
00:41:29,588 --> 00:41:31,654
This is a circle of people
that expected you
1073
00:41:31,756 --> 00:41:33,122
to be sexually available...
-Uh-huh.
1074
00:41:33,225 --> 00:41:35,725
-...For these men.
-Day and night.
1075
00:41:35,827 --> 00:41:38,461
Did he have sex with you
without your consent?
1076
00:41:38,563 --> 00:41:41,531
Yes, he did.
-We really need to stop
1077
00:41:41,633 --> 00:41:46,302
idolizing a man who
I can tell you was a rapist.
1078
00:41:46,404 --> 00:41:48,037
You're not getting away
with this.
1079
00:41:48,139 --> 00:41:49,839
Whether you're dead or not,
1080
00:41:49,941 --> 00:41:53,042
we've never been allowed to tell
our story, but it's our time.