1 00:00:09,417 --> 00:00:11,125 Women really have the power here 2 00:00:11,250 --> 00:00:14,083 because we will not accept any form of sexual harassment 3 00:00:14,208 --> 00:00:16,083 or inappropriate behavior here. 4 00:00:16,208 --> 00:00:19,167 Right. You like seeing women be powerful? 5 00:00:19,250 --> 00:00:21,167 Absolutely! Because then you know what they're doing is-- 6 00:00:21,292 --> 00:00:24,292 is something they really want to do. 7 00:00:24,417 --> 00:00:26,583 ♪ 8 00:00:26,708 --> 00:00:30,667 Disgusted was the last feeling that I had. 9 00:00:30,833 --> 00:00:33,208 Disgusted. 10 00:00:33,375 --> 00:00:36,125 I would feel extremely small and vulnerable 11 00:00:36,250 --> 00:00:38,167 and feel like I would have 12 00:00:38,292 --> 00:00:41,500 to do something that I wasn't comfortable doing. 13 00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:43,875 I felt like I was lost in this world 14 00:00:44,042 --> 00:00:45,667 that I would never get out of. 15 00:00:45,750 --> 00:00:49,542 I felt swappable, interchangeable. 16 00:00:49,708 --> 00:00:50,833 It got a little weird. 17 00:00:50,958 --> 00:00:53,125 I felt like it was almost pimping. 18 00:00:54,833 --> 00:00:56,000 You have a man that was living 19 00:00:56,167 --> 00:00:58,208 in a multimillion-dollar mansion, 20 00:00:58,375 --> 00:01:01,500 having million-dollar parties. 21 00:01:01,625 --> 00:01:05,167 But the girls that made him that success, 22 00:01:05,292 --> 00:01:07,000 we were disposable. 23 00:01:07,167 --> 00:01:09,458 That's how we felt. 24 00:01:09,583 --> 00:01:13,833 It wasn't just Hefner's buddies, his friends, the big VIPs. 25 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:16,167 It was Hefner himself. 26 00:01:16,333 --> 00:01:19,083 I never heard him say on television, 27 00:01:19,208 --> 00:01:23,875 "It's okay to do it when the girl hasn't said yes," 28 00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:25,792 but he was doing it. 29 00:01:25,875 --> 00:01:28,833 They were not giving full consent. 30 00:01:28,958 --> 00:01:30,333 Typically, if someone is known 31 00:01:30,500 --> 00:01:33,208 for dating vulnerable populations, 32 00:01:33,375 --> 00:01:35,500 we call that out for what it is, right? 33 00:01:35,667 --> 00:01:39,708 Looking back now, Hef was a predator. 34 00:01:39,833 --> 00:01:43,417 He was a predator. 35 00:01:43,542 --> 00:01:45,833 [motor revving] 36 00:01:45,917 --> 00:01:47,458 My name is Hugh Hefner. 37 00:01:47,583 --> 00:01:49,375 I'm editor-publisher of "Playboy" magazine. 38 00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:53,500 When Hugh Hefner was just 27, he fashioned himself and Playboy 39 00:01:53,625 --> 00:01:55,833 as the face of sexual liberation. 40 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:59,167 Playboy is one of the most famous brand names in the world. 41 00:01:59,333 --> 00:02:01,042 I would like to be remembered as somebody 42 00:02:01,208 --> 00:02:03,333 who played some positive part 43 00:02:03,458 --> 00:02:05,792 in changing the social-sexual values of my time. 44 00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:10,375 I believe that Hef pulled one over on the whole world. 45 00:02:10,542 --> 00:02:13,417 The fantasy of Playboy that he created 46 00:02:13,542 --> 00:02:18,083 did not allow for the consent of the women. 47 00:02:18,208 --> 00:02:19,875 When it came to Hefner's buddies, 48 00:02:20,042 --> 00:02:22,125 you had to keep those secrets quiet. 49 00:02:22,250 --> 00:02:24,125 -What have you got for free? -[laughs] 50 00:02:24,250 --> 00:02:26,292 When you get someone that powerful, 51 00:02:26,375 --> 00:02:28,292 anything could happen. Anything. 52 00:02:28,417 --> 00:02:30,000 The people who were really there-- 53 00:02:30,083 --> 00:02:31,500 they're the ones who know the real truth. 54 00:02:31,625 --> 00:02:34,167 I want to be a voice for the women 55 00:02:34,333 --> 00:02:36,417 that suffered the most at his hands. 56 00:02:36,542 --> 00:02:40,792 ♪ 57 00:02:40,917 --> 00:02:43,875 ♪ 58 00:02:52,625 --> 00:02:58,125 I could have left that world thinking he was a great guy, 59 00:02:58,250 --> 00:03:00,125 being able to say to people, 60 00:03:00,208 --> 00:03:01,750 he was never inappropriate with me. 61 00:03:01,875 --> 00:03:04,792 He, you know, paid us well. 62 00:03:04,875 --> 00:03:10,875 Some doors that maybe I never would've stood before, opened, 63 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:13,458 but I can't say that. 64 00:03:13,542 --> 00:03:16,292 ♪♪ 65 00:03:16,375 --> 00:03:21,875 I decided to tell in detail about the Hefner rape. 66 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:25,042 [voice breaking] I hate that word, 67 00:03:25,167 --> 00:03:28,917 but there is no other way to describe it. 68 00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:31,500 Women who go through this 69 00:03:31,583 --> 00:03:36,667 feel that they'll be "stigmatized" 70 00:03:36,792 --> 00:03:39,125 or thought of differently. 71 00:03:39,208 --> 00:03:42,292 It's why they don't talk about it. 72 00:03:42,417 --> 00:03:45,875 That's why they don't tell. Sometimes never. 73 00:03:46,042 --> 00:03:49,750 It took me years. Years. 74 00:03:49,875 --> 00:03:52,917 ♪♪ 75 00:03:53,042 --> 00:03:56,250 I was raised in Alabama, 76 00:03:56,375 --> 00:03:59,708 just a very rural area on a farm. 77 00:03:59,875 --> 00:04:04,667 My parents were almost cult-like with their religion. 78 00:04:04,792 --> 00:04:06,833 The Church of Christ, 79 00:04:06,958 --> 00:04:12,167 anything to do with sex or your private parts 80 00:04:12,292 --> 00:04:15,208 was just completely, completely off the table. 81 00:04:15,333 --> 00:04:19,333 We weren't allowed to wear shorts. 82 00:04:19,458 --> 00:04:23,167 I remember I invited some people over to go swimming. 83 00:04:23,292 --> 00:04:26,625 I cut my pants off to the knees, 84 00:04:26,708 --> 00:04:29,458 and my mom came home, and I got-- 85 00:04:29,542 --> 00:04:32,000 she beat the hell out of me, 86 00:04:32,125 --> 00:04:33,833 called me every name in the book, 87 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,500 that, you know, I was a whore. 88 00:04:36,583 --> 00:04:42,875 And, um, you know... just...the sh--shame, shaming. 89 00:04:45,125 --> 00:04:46,542 When I was little, 90 00:04:46,708 --> 00:04:49,708 I just remember my grandfather-- 91 00:04:49,875 --> 00:04:55,750 he would take me into the woods, and... 92 00:04:55,875 --> 00:04:57,708 Mm. 93 00:04:59,583 --> 00:05:03,083 And then he would--he would take his, um, his pants off, 94 00:05:03,208 --> 00:05:06,125 and, um, he would rape me, 95 00:05:06,208 --> 00:05:09,542 and I remember when I was 8, 96 00:05:09,667 --> 00:05:11,583 he said, "Well, don't you ever tell your mother 97 00:05:11,708 --> 00:05:14,792 because she will kill you if you tell her." 98 00:05:17,333 --> 00:05:22,667 So when I left home at 15, I got a job. 99 00:05:22,750 --> 00:05:25,167 I was determined to get my little brother 100 00:05:25,333 --> 00:05:27,875 out of that home and to come live with me. 101 00:05:28,042 --> 00:05:31,625 I felt like he was in an abusive situation as well. 102 00:05:31,708 --> 00:05:34,542 I kept getting approached to do modeling jobs, 103 00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:36,167 and I realized I can make, you know, 104 00:05:36,292 --> 00:05:38,167 some good money doing this. 105 00:05:38,292 --> 00:05:41,708 It was weird to me to be valued for my beauty 106 00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:45,333 because I'd never felt pretty at all. 107 00:05:45,458 --> 00:05:48,500 One photographer that I met said, 108 00:05:48,625 --> 00:05:51,833 "Would you please consider modeling 109 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:54,167 for me to send in some pictures to 'Playboy'?" 110 00:05:54,333 --> 00:05:58,208 And I did do bathing suit modeling, 111 00:05:58,333 --> 00:06:00,500 and they sent in some test shots to "Playboy," 112 00:06:00,583 --> 00:06:02,375 and "Playboy" wrote back and said, 113 00:06:02,500 --> 00:06:05,208 "Oh, yeah, we--we would love to see more of this girl." 114 00:06:05,375 --> 00:06:12,333 I did believe that what I was doing was wrong, 115 00:06:12,500 --> 00:06:13,875 but I thought, you know, God's gonna forgive me. 116 00:06:14,042 --> 00:06:15,167 I need this opportunity, 117 00:06:15,292 --> 00:06:19,000 and I'll--I'll never be able to make this kind of money. 118 00:06:19,167 --> 00:06:21,333 This is my "Playboy" test shoot. 119 00:06:21,458 --> 00:06:24,000 I was scared to death 120 00:06:24,167 --> 00:06:25,708 and was so thankful 121 00:06:25,833 --> 00:06:27,542 I had so much hair to hide behind. 122 00:06:27,667 --> 00:06:31,708 I wasn't 18 when I started. 123 00:06:31,875 --> 00:06:35,708 When the centerfold came out, I was 18 124 00:06:35,833 --> 00:06:40,375 because they had to wait until I turned 18. 125 00:06:40,542 --> 00:06:42,458 "Turn-ons--diamonds and furs, 126 00:06:42,542 --> 00:06:45,500 vintage champagne, faster horses, 127 00:06:45,625 --> 00:06:47,542 traveling and going home." 128 00:06:47,667 --> 00:06:51,333 I'll tell you, I was highly coached on this data sheet 129 00:06:51,458 --> 00:06:55,708 on sounding fast and racy and sexy. 130 00:06:55,833 --> 00:06:57,000 [birds chirping] 131 00:06:57,167 --> 00:07:00,167 In 1983, I was staying at the Playboy Mansion. 132 00:07:00,292 --> 00:07:02,708 It was that time of the year 133 00:07:02,875 --> 00:07:04,875 where somebody's gonna be chosen soon 134 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,667 for Playmate of the Year. 135 00:07:06,792 --> 00:07:11,375 It was all very intimidating and really new. 136 00:07:11,500 --> 00:07:15,500 I felt safe in my room, and that's where I stayed. 137 00:07:15,583 --> 00:07:18,833 With Hef, he was telling me, 138 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:21,458 "Susie, I've heard that you're nervous 139 00:07:21,583 --> 00:07:23,167 and that you've been staying in your room, 140 00:07:23,333 --> 00:07:27,000 but I want you to know it's safe here, 141 00:07:27,167 --> 00:07:30,708 and I want you to know that you can do anything you want. 142 00:07:30,875 --> 00:07:33,167 If there's anything you want to experiment with, 143 00:07:33,292 --> 00:07:35,667 then you just need to let us know 144 00:07:35,750 --> 00:07:38,000 because we want you to be safe." 145 00:07:38,083 --> 00:07:42,208 That was kind, and I did. 146 00:07:42,333 --> 00:07:46,542 I felt safe at that moment. 147 00:07:46,708 --> 00:07:48,375 Me and another Playmate of the Month 148 00:07:48,500 --> 00:07:51,667 were in a bedroom down the hall from Hef's, 149 00:07:51,792 --> 00:07:55,333 and of course we were talking about Playmate of the Year. 150 00:07:55,417 --> 00:07:59,125 And she's like, you know, "Well, if you're so worried about it, 151 00:07:59,208 --> 00:08:02,833 then why don't you just walk down the hall and talk to Hef?" 152 00:08:02,958 --> 00:08:06,708 She literally pushed me out the door of the bedroom 153 00:08:06,875 --> 00:08:09,833 and towards his bedroom down the hall. 154 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:13,167 And then I knocked on the door, and he said, "Who is it?" 155 00:08:13,333 --> 00:08:15,208 And I said, "It's Susie. Susie Scott." 156 00:08:15,375 --> 00:08:18,333 And he said, "Susie, come--come in." 157 00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:22,208 And I'm like, oh, good. I'm not bothering him. 158 00:08:22,375 --> 00:08:23,750 He gave me a hug, 159 00:08:23,875 --> 00:08:26,417 and he said, "You look very stressed. What's wrong?" 160 00:08:26,542 --> 00:08:28,125 I said, "Oh, I'm just... got a lot of my mind, 161 00:08:28,250 --> 00:08:29,750 and I wanted to talk to you." 162 00:08:29,875 --> 00:08:33,792 I had my speech all ready. I was gonna ask him, you know, 163 00:08:33,917 --> 00:08:36,750 had he thought about Playmate of the Year, 164 00:08:36,875 --> 00:08:37,875 and to tell him, you know, 165 00:08:38,042 --> 00:08:41,208 I would commit myself as a spokesman, 166 00:08:41,375 --> 00:08:44,958 and I'm very good at it and well-read, 167 00:08:45,083 --> 00:08:48,333 even though I didn't finish even 10th grade. 168 00:08:48,417 --> 00:08:51,833 He goes, "Well, let me just give you something to calm you down." 169 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:57,167 And he gave me a pill and a soda, and I just took it, 170 00:08:57,292 --> 00:09:00,083 not thinking much about it. 171 00:09:00,208 --> 00:09:03,958 You know, at first, it didn't dawn on me that it was a drug. 172 00:09:04,083 --> 00:09:05,958 You know, at first, you're thinking, 173 00:09:06,083 --> 00:09:10,167 somebody's giving you a Tylenol or an Advil. 174 00:09:10,292 --> 00:09:14,333 And then I thought, okay, what did I just take? 175 00:09:14,417 --> 00:09:15,875 I didn't even ask. 176 00:09:19,542 --> 00:09:21,042 I don't remember laying down. 177 00:09:21,208 --> 00:09:25,792 I don't remember if I even said anything to him 178 00:09:25,875 --> 00:09:28,458 about Playmate of the Year. 179 00:09:28,583 --> 00:09:33,417 I woke up with him on top of me. 180 00:09:33,542 --> 00:09:37,500 He was naked, and my, um, pants were off. 181 00:09:37,583 --> 00:09:40,500 My pajama bottoms were off. 182 00:09:40,625 --> 00:09:45,333 I thought that I was having a nightmare 183 00:09:45,458 --> 00:09:49,625 because it didn't seem possible. 184 00:09:49,750 --> 00:09:53,833 I thought I was reliving the last time 185 00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:59,167 that my grandfather had done this to me, and... 186 00:09:59,292 --> 00:10:02,917 Ugh. [chuckles] 187 00:10:03,042 --> 00:10:08,000 This old man with his mouth gaping open was a real thing. 188 00:10:08,167 --> 00:10:10,917 He was a real person. It was Hefner. 189 00:10:11,042 --> 00:10:14,667 He looked like Satan. He looked like Satan. 190 00:10:14,792 --> 00:10:17,417 He just looked so... 191 00:10:17,542 --> 00:10:21,833 cr-- just a creep, just a creep. 192 00:10:21,958 --> 00:10:24,875 He honestly had the same look 193 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,292 that my grandfather had when he did it. 194 00:10:27,417 --> 00:10:29,667 I can't tell you. 195 00:10:29,792 --> 00:10:33,375 There must be like some common demon that gets in 196 00:10:33,542 --> 00:10:38,167 and looks the same because it was eerie. It was just eerie. 197 00:10:38,333 --> 00:10:43,167 ♪ 198 00:10:43,250 --> 00:10:45,875 Maybe I was one of the few who he had not slept with, 199 00:10:46,042 --> 00:10:48,333 and maybe he didn't like that. 200 00:10:48,417 --> 00:10:54,500 I pushed him off of me, and I think it made him mad. 201 00:10:54,625 --> 00:10:56,333 When I went back to my bedroom, 202 00:10:56,500 --> 00:11:01,833 all I wanted to do was just lay back down, cry, think. 203 00:11:01,917 --> 00:11:06,042 And I... 204 00:11:06,167 --> 00:11:07,292 I just remember, 205 00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:12,250 I've got to tell somebody. I've got to tell somebody. 206 00:11:16,917 --> 00:11:18,125 Every man out there is, you know, 207 00:11:18,208 --> 00:11:19,083 wishing they could live your life, but... 208 00:11:19,208 --> 00:11:20,417 I know. I know. 209 00:11:20,542 --> 00:11:21,875 ...wondering how the hell you do it. 210 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:23,750 Yeah. Well, part of it's being 211 00:11:23,875 --> 00:11:25,958 very straightforward and honest about it. 212 00:11:26,083 --> 00:11:27,750 See, I think one of the great curses 213 00:11:27,875 --> 00:11:30,208 and--and one of the great immoralities in-- 214 00:11:30,333 --> 00:11:32,292 in, uh, in sexuality 215 00:11:32,375 --> 00:11:35,250 is the lying, the cheating, the hypocrisy. 216 00:11:35,375 --> 00:11:37,208 ♪♪ 217 00:11:37,333 --> 00:11:39,417 When I came to "Playboy," 218 00:11:39,542 --> 00:11:43,000 I thought that doing the centerfold 219 00:11:43,125 --> 00:11:45,333 was kind of like getting my power back. 220 00:11:45,417 --> 00:11:52,417 I had it for a moment, but it was taken right back. 221 00:11:52,542 --> 00:11:55,292 This thing that happened with Hef 222 00:11:55,375 --> 00:12:00,333 set me back a long way. 223 00:12:00,458 --> 00:12:05,792 The next morning, I was so ashamed, 224 00:12:05,875 --> 00:12:08,833 I wanted to just die. 225 00:12:08,917 --> 00:12:13,042 This whole thing-- it had to be a secret, 226 00:12:13,208 --> 00:12:14,708 a secret that I had to, you know, 227 00:12:14,833 --> 00:12:18,708 like, see all the time. 228 00:12:18,833 --> 00:12:20,833 You know, I looked up at that hallway, 229 00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:22,583 and you know, I'd think about it, 230 00:12:22,708 --> 00:12:24,333 but then I'd have to put that smile on. 231 00:12:24,417 --> 00:12:27,500 And when I saw Hef, you know, give him a hug. 232 00:12:27,583 --> 00:12:31,375 He never mentioned it. He--He--He... 233 00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:37,500 The only explanation is that he was hiding it from me 234 00:12:37,625 --> 00:12:41,667 to make me doubt that it happened maybe, 235 00:12:41,833 --> 00:12:45,833 to make me forget about it. 236 00:12:45,958 --> 00:12:48,708 But you don't forget. 237 00:12:51,417 --> 00:12:53,000 Never. 238 00:12:53,125 --> 00:12:55,333 Never. 239 00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:57,583 I believe it was a Quaalude 240 00:12:57,708 --> 00:13:03,042 because I've been told what it feels like to take a Quaalude. 241 00:13:03,167 --> 00:13:08,333 I just don't remember falling asleep. 242 00:13:08,458 --> 00:13:11,917 When I was there, Hef would carry the Quaaludes 243 00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:14,375 in a wadded-up Kleenex in his pocket, 244 00:13:14,542 --> 00:13:17,833 and I saw him offer it to people all the time. 245 00:13:17,917 --> 00:13:20,917 See, look at how he's hovering over girls 246 00:13:21,042 --> 00:13:22,500 and just kissing at will. 247 00:13:22,667 --> 00:13:25,250 He touched all the girls. He would touch their breasts. 248 00:13:25,375 --> 00:13:28,083 He thinks that he owns everybody's breasts. 249 00:13:29,917 --> 00:13:32,042 There was a night that Hef told me 250 00:13:32,167 --> 00:13:36,375 we were going to go for a little walk. 251 00:13:36,500 --> 00:13:40,917 He took me down the hall, and he got a key out, 252 00:13:41,042 --> 00:13:44,042 and he told me it was a skeleton key. 253 00:13:44,167 --> 00:13:46,917 And I go, "What do you mean?" 254 00:13:47,042 --> 00:13:49,833 And he said, "Well, you think I wouldn't have a key 255 00:13:49,958 --> 00:13:53,167 that would open every room in this house?" 256 00:13:53,292 --> 00:13:57,833 And that's the night I learned that he used it at will. 257 00:13:57,958 --> 00:14:03,500 He opened the door on a girl who was sleeping, 258 00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:07,000 and he went inside 259 00:14:07,125 --> 00:14:09,583 and sat down at the bed with her. 260 00:14:09,708 --> 00:14:12,208 And...at that point, I'm just frozen. 261 00:14:12,333 --> 00:14:15,042 I... I didn't know what to do. 262 00:14:15,167 --> 00:14:20,167 And she kept saying no. 263 00:14:20,292 --> 00:14:23,292 I blocked it the minute she said no, 264 00:14:23,417 --> 00:14:26,417 and he continued and forced himself on her. 265 00:14:26,542 --> 00:14:28,667 I was standing there, and I was terrified, 266 00:14:28,750 --> 00:14:31,542 but I can't see it. 267 00:14:31,667 --> 00:14:34,042 And...all these years, I mean, 268 00:14:34,208 --> 00:14:37,375 does she think I'm a monster because of it? 269 00:14:37,542 --> 00:14:41,000 I'm sorry. I didn't... 270 00:14:41,083 --> 00:14:45,583 I'm sorry I didn't do anything to stop it. 271 00:14:45,708 --> 00:14:49,917 And he told me, uh, when we were heading back to the master, 272 00:14:50,042 --> 00:14:51,833 uh, he said to me... [sniffles] 273 00:14:51,958 --> 00:14:54,417 "Well, did they think that they were gonna 274 00:14:54,542 --> 00:14:56,667 come stay in my house and not sleep with me?" 275 00:14:56,750 --> 00:14:57,708 [sniffles] 276 00:14:57,833 --> 00:15:01,083 Whether they consented or not, 277 00:15:01,208 --> 00:15:04,333 if he wanted something, he would take it. 278 00:15:04,417 --> 00:15:06,042 ♪♪ 279 00:15:06,167 --> 00:15:10,167 He rifled through so many decades of young girls. 280 00:15:10,333 --> 00:15:13,167 REPORTER: How many girlfriends have you had? 281 00:15:13,333 --> 00:15:16,042 In total? I have no idea. I don't know. 282 00:15:16,167 --> 00:15:18,083 But you keep a record, as I understand. 283 00:15:18,208 --> 00:15:20,417 Yes, but I've never counted up the numbers. Uh... 284 00:15:20,542 --> 00:15:22,792 -Hundreds? -Yes. 285 00:15:22,917 --> 00:15:24,333 Many more than hundreds, yes. 286 00:15:24,458 --> 00:15:25,458 Thousands? 287 00:15:25,542 --> 00:15:27,792 Well, certainly over a thousand, I'm sure. 288 00:15:27,917 --> 00:15:29,458 Hef liked the girls young, 289 00:15:29,542 --> 00:15:32,000 and he liked them from a broken family, 290 00:15:32,083 --> 00:15:33,667 or there wasn't a father involved 291 00:15:33,792 --> 00:15:35,583 because then he could impress them 292 00:15:35,708 --> 00:15:38,333 and, uh, control them more 293 00:15:38,458 --> 00:15:40,417 because they would be more likely 294 00:15:40,542 --> 00:15:45,042 to want to please him or please his friends. 295 00:15:48,250 --> 00:15:50,458 I wanted to tell somebody I trusted 296 00:15:50,542 --> 00:15:53,000 and then have them tell me what to do. 297 00:15:53,125 --> 00:15:58,167 So I told Marilyn, who was the editor--Marilyn Grabowski. 298 00:15:58,292 --> 00:15:59,750 She said, "Oh, that's all? 299 00:15:59,875 --> 00:16:02,708 Don't--Don't let it bother you. 300 00:16:02,875 --> 00:16:06,750 It's nothing. It's nothing. He won't even remember it." 301 00:16:06,875 --> 00:16:08,417 [scoffs] 302 00:16:08,542 --> 00:16:11,667 And I'm like... [chuckles] "But I will never forget it." 303 00:16:11,750 --> 00:16:15,000 She goes, "Just don't even think about it anymore. 304 00:16:15,083 --> 00:16:17,750 Just do what you know. Do your work. 305 00:16:17,875 --> 00:16:20,292 It's not a big deal." 306 00:16:23,625 --> 00:16:25,167 [sighs] 307 00:16:25,250 --> 00:16:30,083 And then I never-- just never talked about it. 308 00:16:30,208 --> 00:16:35,667 I started getting very, very, very thin. 309 00:16:35,833 --> 00:16:38,792 I think I probably got down to 90. 310 00:16:38,917 --> 00:16:41,333 ♪ 311 00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:46,083 Of course he sent Mary to say, "Hef is so worried about you. 312 00:16:46,208 --> 00:16:50,167 And you know, we would really like to have you see a doctor. 313 00:16:50,333 --> 00:16:52,208 And, uh, we just want you to know we care." 314 00:16:52,333 --> 00:16:55,417 Mary O'Connor was his instrument 315 00:16:55,542 --> 00:16:58,958 for doing all the legal things properly. 316 00:16:59,083 --> 00:17:03,583 He had to pretend to care. 317 00:17:03,708 --> 00:17:08,625 I was just completely depressed. 318 00:17:08,708 --> 00:17:11,375 I didn't feel of value. 319 00:17:19,500 --> 00:17:23,667 Many of the girls wanted to tell you their problems. 320 00:17:23,792 --> 00:17:26,667 I think I was mostly bothered by the sadness. 321 00:17:28,792 --> 00:17:35,750 Hefner enjoyed taking these fresh girls and breaking them. 322 00:17:35,875 --> 00:17:38,417 Dorothy Stratten--this is his Playmate of the Year. 323 00:17:38,542 --> 00:17:40,583 She looks beautiful. 324 00:17:40,708 --> 00:17:44,917 Look how happy she is. She's on top of the world right there. 325 00:17:45,042 --> 00:17:49,333 She was the ultimate Playmate, Dorothy was. 326 00:17:49,417 --> 00:17:52,083 She had it all, all in one package. 327 00:17:52,208 --> 00:17:54,625 To look at her now in the footage, 328 00:17:54,750 --> 00:17:56,208 she was so sweet. 329 00:17:56,333 --> 00:17:58,958 I mean, you could not help but love her. 330 00:17:59,083 --> 00:18:04,125 Dorothy Stratten was the most perfect Playmate 331 00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:08,417 to ever enter the Playboy world. 332 00:18:08,542 --> 00:18:12,958 She was... 333 00:18:13,042 --> 00:18:14,500 magnificent. 334 00:18:14,583 --> 00:18:16,917 ♪♪ 335 00:18:17,042 --> 00:18:19,167 Then after all these years, 336 00:18:19,292 --> 00:18:21,917 what we have left of her 337 00:18:22,042 --> 00:18:27,125 are photos of what once was. 338 00:18:27,208 --> 00:18:32,000 Thousands of girls come through it, 339 00:18:32,125 --> 00:18:33,375 through the Mansion, through the magazine, 340 00:18:33,500 --> 00:18:35,333 thousands of them, and they don't get murdered, 341 00:18:35,458 --> 00:18:39,125 but one did--Dorothy Stratten. 342 00:18:39,208 --> 00:18:43,417 There are many documentaries on Dorothy's death. 343 00:18:43,542 --> 00:18:45,125 REPORTER: Dorothy Stratten, 20 years old 344 00:18:45,208 --> 00:18:46,417 from Vancouver, Canada, 345 00:18:46,542 --> 00:18:48,250 was on her way to becoming a celebrity. 346 00:18:48,375 --> 00:18:52,292 Brutally murdered by her deranged husband. 347 00:18:52,417 --> 00:18:55,708 "Playboy" magazine's 1980 Playmate of the Year 348 00:18:55,875 --> 00:18:57,500 has been found shot to death, 349 00:18:57,667 --> 00:18:59,333 killed apparently by her estranged husband 350 00:18:59,458 --> 00:19:01,667 who then killed himself. 351 00:19:01,792 --> 00:19:04,500 But that's not the whole story 352 00:19:04,625 --> 00:19:07,292 of Dorothy's experience at Playboy. 353 00:19:07,375 --> 00:19:08,833 ♪♪ 354 00:19:08,958 --> 00:19:11,375 With Dorothy, I believe that 355 00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:17,125 Hefner certainly didn't act in a gentlemanly way. 356 00:19:22,042 --> 00:19:24,458 I was very awkward. I had a-- growing up, you know, 357 00:19:24,542 --> 00:19:27,750 very skinny and no shape and just... 358 00:19:27,875 --> 00:19:31,667 [laughs] 359 00:19:31,750 --> 00:19:33,750 -No shape? -No, I was just--I'm tall. 360 00:19:33,875 --> 00:19:35,708 You must have had a good year and a bad year then. 361 00:19:35,833 --> 00:19:38,458 -It all happened in one year. -One year? 362 00:19:38,542 --> 00:19:41,875 And that's when I was found by "Playboy." [laughs] 363 00:19:42,042 --> 00:19:44,625 Dorothy Stratten ascended 364 00:19:44,708 --> 00:19:49,042 Hugh Hefner's cult-like structure very rapidly. 365 00:19:49,167 --> 00:19:54,333 She went from a Bunny working at Century City 366 00:19:54,417 --> 00:19:58,750 to Playmate of the Month, then Playmate of the Year. 367 00:19:58,875 --> 00:20:05,417 And then the next step was going to be a respected actress. 368 00:20:05,542 --> 00:20:08,542 The magazine layouts were an important stepping-stone, 369 00:20:08,667 --> 00:20:11,000 and soon she was a guest on "The Tonight Show." 370 00:20:11,125 --> 00:20:14,083 Hefner--he particularly wanted her 371 00:20:14,208 --> 00:20:16,125 because he knew 372 00:20:16,250 --> 00:20:18,542 that she had the potential to be a big star. 373 00:20:18,667 --> 00:20:20,500 I don't know of any other Playmate 374 00:20:20,583 --> 00:20:24,042 that I've had the feeling would have been a big star 375 00:20:24,167 --> 00:20:27,333 more than I thought Dorothy would. 376 00:20:27,458 --> 00:20:29,542 She was in a situation similar to mine, really, 377 00:20:29,667 --> 00:20:34,333 with a man that was controlling her. 378 00:20:34,417 --> 00:20:37,583 Paul Snider was a low-life pimp. 379 00:20:37,708 --> 00:20:42,333 When she was 18, her boyfriend, Paul Snider, 380 00:20:42,417 --> 00:20:45,167 sent her pictures to Hefner. 381 00:20:45,250 --> 00:20:49,500 I was working at the Mansion 382 00:20:49,583 --> 00:20:53,042 when the limousine brought her up. 383 00:20:53,167 --> 00:20:57,083 She said, "I've just come from Canada. 384 00:20:57,208 --> 00:21:00,375 Can you tell me where Mr. Hefner is?" 385 00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:05,208 And that was the beginning of the end for her. 386 00:21:05,333 --> 00:21:07,417 She was into the system. 387 00:21:07,542 --> 00:21:14,042 At the Mansion, the process was, you first meet Hefner, 388 00:21:14,167 --> 00:21:16,250 you have sex with him, 389 00:21:16,375 --> 00:21:19,917 and then he passes you around to his friends. 390 00:21:20,042 --> 00:21:24,667 You don't violate this order of sexual activity, 391 00:21:24,750 --> 00:21:29,417 but Dorothy-- she broke the rules. 392 00:21:29,542 --> 00:21:33,333 When Dorothy first came to the Mansion, 393 00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:36,875 Hefner thought that she'd slept with Patrick Curtis. 394 00:21:37,042 --> 00:21:41,500 His name to fame was he was in "Gone with the Wind," 395 00:21:41,625 --> 00:21:43,375 and that's how he parlayed himself 396 00:21:43,500 --> 00:21:46,875 with all the girls at the Playmate Mansion. 397 00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:49,833 Hefner was very angry. 398 00:21:49,917 --> 00:21:53,458 This is like a town in the Old West 399 00:21:53,542 --> 00:21:57,583 where every girl in town is the Sheriff's girl, 400 00:21:57,708 --> 00:21:58,958 and you're told, 401 00:21:59,042 --> 00:22:01,083 "You don't want to mess with the Sheriff's girl." 402 00:22:01,208 --> 00:22:02,667 He wanted her for himself, 403 00:22:02,750 --> 00:22:05,417 could not understand why he couldn't get her. 404 00:22:05,542 --> 00:22:09,917 How did she pay for it? 405 00:22:10,042 --> 00:22:12,542 With her being brutalized. 406 00:22:14,250 --> 00:22:17,500 Early on in her time at the Mansion, 407 00:22:17,667 --> 00:22:22,417 I and another security guard were outside the grotto. 408 00:22:22,542 --> 00:22:24,542 We heard her screaming. 409 00:22:24,667 --> 00:22:29,000 We peered around, and we witnessed it. 410 00:22:29,125 --> 00:22:32,833 There was a ledge around the grotto. 411 00:22:32,958 --> 00:22:39,167 Hefner propped her up, and he started to rape her anally, 412 00:22:39,292 --> 00:22:41,042 and she was screaming. 413 00:22:41,167 --> 00:22:42,667 ♪♪ 414 00:22:42,833 --> 00:22:46,833 After we witnessed it, the security guard told me-- 415 00:22:46,958 --> 00:22:48,583 he whispered in my ear-- 416 00:22:48,708 --> 00:22:51,542 I should go back into the butler's pantry 417 00:22:51,667 --> 00:22:54,125 and keep my mouth shut. 418 00:22:54,208 --> 00:22:57,333 And that's what I did. 419 00:22:57,458 --> 00:22:59,792 You had to follow the rules. 420 00:22:59,875 --> 00:23:05,167 You had to be discreet, be quiet, carry on. 421 00:23:05,292 --> 00:23:08,500 Nobody was going to come forward 422 00:23:08,625 --> 00:23:12,417 because nobody wanted Hefner to come after you. 423 00:23:12,542 --> 00:23:17,375 In the old days, it was like, well, who are you? 424 00:23:17,500 --> 00:23:19,083 You're just after his money. 425 00:23:19,208 --> 00:23:21,542 That was always the thing. You're after his money. 426 00:23:21,667 --> 00:23:23,083 And they would side with, 427 00:23:23,208 --> 00:23:24,708 you know, the most powerful person. 428 00:23:24,833 --> 00:23:27,333 There was an inequality there. 429 00:23:27,458 --> 00:23:31,208 It's pretty sad for me just to relive this. 430 00:23:31,375 --> 00:23:34,458 And I'm sorry. 431 00:23:34,542 --> 00:23:41,667 So please feel free to cut and edit it out any sadness. 432 00:23:41,750 --> 00:23:48,167 She confided in me the pain she was feeling inside. 433 00:23:48,292 --> 00:23:51,417 She was hollow. Her eyes were distant. 434 00:23:51,542 --> 00:23:54,208 She didn't engage with you anymore 435 00:23:54,333 --> 00:23:55,833 in that personable way, 436 00:23:55,917 --> 00:23:59,667 the way she did when she first came from Canada. 437 00:23:59,792 --> 00:24:02,583 Mr. Hefner wanted to stay in control. 438 00:24:02,708 --> 00:24:05,125 It's the old story. 439 00:24:05,208 --> 00:24:08,083 He started out as a very liberal, 440 00:24:08,208 --> 00:24:10,417 modern-thinking writer 441 00:24:10,542 --> 00:24:12,750 when he started putting the magazine together 442 00:24:12,875 --> 00:24:15,792 in Chicago on his kitchen table. 443 00:24:15,917 --> 00:24:21,125 And then by the time he got to Hollywood, everything changed. 444 00:24:21,208 --> 00:24:23,833 He became a typical rich guy 445 00:24:23,958 --> 00:24:28,083 using his money to buy women, to control women. 446 00:24:28,208 --> 00:24:34,208 Hefner thought that if he could abuse her over and over again 447 00:24:34,333 --> 00:24:36,875 against her wishes, 448 00:24:37,042 --> 00:24:39,708 that he could get control of her. 449 00:24:47,292 --> 00:24:51,208 Dorothy Stratten was devastated. 450 00:24:51,375 --> 00:24:53,417 She was psychically destroyed. 451 00:24:53,542 --> 00:24:57,375 It was too much for her. 452 00:24:57,500 --> 00:24:59,542 Her body was breaking down. 453 00:24:59,708 --> 00:25:01,667 She--She couldn't-- She couldn't help herself. 454 00:25:01,792 --> 00:25:04,458 She wasn't sleeping. She wasn't--wasn't well. 455 00:25:04,583 --> 00:25:09,083 While she was waiting for her centerfold to come out, 456 00:25:09,208 --> 00:25:11,542 Paul Schneider coerced her into marrying him 457 00:25:11,667 --> 00:25:13,333 because he wanted her money. 458 00:25:13,458 --> 00:25:15,000 He wanted that fame. 459 00:25:15,125 --> 00:25:20,875 The marriage lasted less than a year, and they separated. 460 00:25:21,042 --> 00:25:23,000 Paul was clawing at her. 461 00:25:23,167 --> 00:25:27,542 He was losing her. He knew it, so she needed a protector. 462 00:25:27,708 --> 00:25:29,708 She needed protection from everyone. 463 00:25:29,875 --> 00:25:33,292 Dorothy met Peter Bogdanovich at the Mansion, 464 00:25:33,417 --> 00:25:36,458 and like many men who met her, 465 00:25:36,542 --> 00:25:38,208 he fell in love at first sight. 466 00:25:38,375 --> 00:25:44,167 Bagdanovich told me about Hefner forcing himself on Dorothy 467 00:25:44,250 --> 00:25:47,292 in the Jacuzzi part of the grotto, in the grotto. 468 00:25:47,417 --> 00:25:50,042 [sniffles] He told me that. He told me. 469 00:25:50,167 --> 00:25:53,667 Dorothy was naive in many ways, very innocent, 470 00:25:53,833 --> 00:25:58,292 believed what people said, believed the whole Playboy hype. 471 00:25:58,417 --> 00:26:01,792 Found herself, when she got to Hollywood, 472 00:26:01,875 --> 00:26:05,333 found herself maneuvered by Hefner 473 00:26:05,458 --> 00:26:09,958 into a sexual situation that, uh, she found very shocking, 474 00:26:10,042 --> 00:26:12,042 and, in fact, it traumatized her. 475 00:26:12,167 --> 00:26:15,833 There was nothing in the relationship with Dorothy, 476 00:26:15,958 --> 00:26:20,917 with Playboy or with me that I am less than proud of. 477 00:26:21,042 --> 00:26:23,125 There is a strong possibility that there's truth, 478 00:26:23,250 --> 00:26:27,292 in that allegation that 479 00:26:27,375 --> 00:26:30,125 Dorothy Stratten was raped by Hef, 480 00:26:30,250 --> 00:26:34,167 I don't have reason not to believe it anymore. 481 00:26:34,292 --> 00:26:40,042 If you had told me that before...my experience, 482 00:26:40,167 --> 00:26:43,292 I would've said no, no, definitely not. 483 00:26:43,417 --> 00:26:46,125 I think Hef thought he deserved it. 484 00:26:46,250 --> 00:26:49,000 [sighs] 485 00:26:49,167 --> 00:26:54,500 And I don't know what kind of mentality or psyche 486 00:26:54,625 --> 00:26:56,667 would cause a man to think that. 487 00:26:56,792 --> 00:27:02,333 But for some reason, I think he felt he deserved 488 00:27:02,417 --> 00:27:04,000 anything he felt he needed or wanted 489 00:27:04,083 --> 00:27:07,000 from anybody that was in his home. 490 00:27:07,167 --> 00:27:11,292 ♪ 491 00:27:11,375 --> 00:27:14,083 See how happy? Look at that. 492 00:27:14,208 --> 00:27:17,625 Now, if that happened to her, how could she be that happy? 493 00:27:17,750 --> 00:27:21,167 It was--It was all playacting. 494 00:27:21,292 --> 00:27:23,625 It was all his movie 495 00:27:23,750 --> 00:27:26,500 and his script down to the day he died. 496 00:27:26,583 --> 00:27:31,500 It was not long after that she was murdered. 497 00:27:31,625 --> 00:27:33,792 It was so devastating to all of us. 498 00:27:33,875 --> 00:27:38,167 They underestimated Paul. 499 00:27:38,250 --> 00:27:41,708 Peter Bogdanovich-- he wanted to date her. 500 00:27:41,833 --> 00:27:43,583 He wanted to sleep with her. 501 00:27:43,708 --> 00:27:47,292 Paul Snider became aware of it, 502 00:27:47,375 --> 00:27:49,000 and he went crazy, 503 00:27:49,125 --> 00:27:53,583 even trying to jam his car through the front gates. 504 00:27:53,708 --> 00:27:56,667 So it became this, uh, intense triangle, 505 00:27:56,750 --> 00:27:58,958 and it ended in disaster. 506 00:27:59,083 --> 00:28:01,792 According to police reports, 507 00:28:01,917 --> 00:28:05,708 Snider blew off his wife's face with a 12-gauge shotgun 508 00:28:05,875 --> 00:28:09,083 before turning the powerful weapon on himself. 509 00:28:09,208 --> 00:28:11,500 Earlier in the evening, 510 00:28:11,583 --> 00:28:14,750 before the knowledge of Dorothy's death, 511 00:28:14,875 --> 00:28:16,458 there was a new girl, 512 00:28:16,583 --> 00:28:19,750 and Hefner thought she was super cute 513 00:28:19,875 --> 00:28:22,708 and wanted me to get information on her. 514 00:28:22,833 --> 00:28:26,833 The day that Dorothy was killed, the day she was murdered, 515 00:28:26,958 --> 00:28:30,083 when I finally had gone home, changed, and came back, 516 00:28:30,208 --> 00:28:32,667 one of the first things he asked me was, 517 00:28:32,833 --> 00:28:35,375 "Did you get that new girl's number?" 518 00:28:35,500 --> 00:28:40,708 I remember thinking, wow, it was just so self-centered. 519 00:28:40,875 --> 00:28:44,875 It really was Hef's world. 520 00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:49,875 Hugh Hefner--he never wanted Dorothy to have any power. 521 00:28:50,042 --> 00:28:52,708 He never wanted a woman to become so powerful 522 00:28:52,875 --> 00:28:54,833 that he couldn't control her. 523 00:28:54,958 --> 00:28:56,792 And it was so wrong 524 00:28:56,917 --> 00:28:59,833 and so against what he espoused to everyone. 525 00:28:59,917 --> 00:29:02,458 I mean, all about protecting women 526 00:29:02,583 --> 00:29:04,708 and non-exploitation, all that, 527 00:29:04,875 --> 00:29:07,792 that was nothing but garbage. 528 00:29:07,875 --> 00:29:11,667 We treat them, uh, as the record will rather clearly show, 529 00:29:11,833 --> 00:29:13,875 in a rather first-rate way. 530 00:29:14,042 --> 00:29:16,958 ♪ 531 00:29:17,042 --> 00:29:22,083 He was so good at making you feel 532 00:29:22,208 --> 00:29:25,833 like you were the only thing in the world 533 00:29:25,958 --> 00:29:28,958 and the most beautiful thing in the world, 534 00:29:29,083 --> 00:29:31,875 until the next Playmate came along, 535 00:29:32,042 --> 00:29:41,125 and he didn't care if you were broken, uh, anorexic, addicted. 536 00:29:41,208 --> 00:29:44,292 I heard about the Dorothy Stratten story. 537 00:29:44,417 --> 00:29:47,792 I never read Peter Bogdanovich's book when I was at the Mansion, 538 00:29:47,917 --> 00:29:49,958 because at that time I still had 539 00:29:50,083 --> 00:29:51,833 my rose-colored glasses on about Hef, 540 00:29:51,917 --> 00:29:53,333 and you generally don't want to read things 541 00:29:53,500 --> 00:29:56,583 about somebody you care about that are negative. 542 00:29:56,708 --> 00:29:59,500 But I decided to read the book right before my book came out, 543 00:29:59,625 --> 00:30:02,500 and it really hit me. 544 00:30:02,667 --> 00:30:04,792 I always thought that Dorothy was somebody 545 00:30:04,917 --> 00:30:06,667 I'd never be able to relate to 546 00:30:06,833 --> 00:30:10,542 because she was always presented as this goddess. 547 00:30:10,667 --> 00:30:14,125 But when I read the book, 548 00:30:14,208 --> 00:30:19,833 I was really just creeped out by how similar everything was. 549 00:30:19,958 --> 00:30:22,125 Everything that happened back in her day 550 00:30:22,208 --> 00:30:25,917 was so...mirrored what was going on in the early 2000s. 551 00:30:28,167 --> 00:30:30,542 This is a poem by Dorothy Stratten. 552 00:30:30,667 --> 00:30:35,333 "It's here, everything, 553 00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:40,750 everything anyone ever dreamed of and more, but love is lost. 554 00:30:40,875 --> 00:30:44,125 The only sacrifice to live in this heaven, 555 00:30:44,250 --> 00:30:49,667 this Disneyland where people are the games." 556 00:30:49,792 --> 00:30:51,833 That--That describes it. 557 00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:58,333 I--I've never heard it described more...perfectly. 558 00:31:00,292 --> 00:31:04,083 [sighs] It makes me feel really bad. 559 00:31:07,458 --> 00:31:10,375 So many of those people aren't with us anymore 560 00:31:10,542 --> 00:31:13,833 by their own choosing 561 00:31:13,917 --> 00:31:16,792 because they felt like that, and they realized it. 562 00:31:16,875 --> 00:31:19,333 They found out that people are the games. 563 00:31:19,500 --> 00:31:29,458 And one man got people to want to play his games with us. 564 00:31:36,250 --> 00:31:38,167 ♪♪ 565 00:31:38,250 --> 00:31:43,042 Hugh Hefner held himself out as this big lover, this bon vivant, 566 00:31:43,167 --> 00:31:46,583 you know, this person that-- that every man wanted to be. 567 00:31:46,708 --> 00:31:48,750 And here he was the lowest 568 00:31:48,875 --> 00:31:52,208 and the most vilest scum on earth. 569 00:31:52,375 --> 00:31:55,333 I think he hated women underneath it all. 570 00:31:55,417 --> 00:32:03,083 I've spoken to enough people, interviewed enough that-- 571 00:32:03,208 --> 00:32:06,125 that just seems to be the only conclusion I can come up to. 572 00:32:07,542 --> 00:32:10,875 People would ask me, "Why did you keep going back? 573 00:32:11,042 --> 00:32:15,375 Why did you keep going back?" 574 00:32:15,542 --> 00:32:20,417 And I just-- I just think it was complete, 575 00:32:20,542 --> 00:32:24,542 you want him not to have ruined your life 576 00:32:24,667 --> 00:32:27,292 by also taking your employment. 577 00:32:27,375 --> 00:32:32,417 And I also thought he probably had cameras 578 00:32:32,542 --> 00:32:34,042 in his room, you know? 579 00:32:35,333 --> 00:32:39,042 It haunted me that he might have a video of me 580 00:32:39,208 --> 00:32:41,250 when he was on top of me. 581 00:32:41,375 --> 00:32:45,500 I pray that because I was unconscious, 582 00:32:45,583 --> 00:32:50,083 he would not show it to anyone because it's illegal. 583 00:32:50,208 --> 00:32:53,875 My saving thought is that he had to have destroyed it 584 00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:58,333 because he's showing himself committing a crime. 585 00:32:58,417 --> 00:33:00,375 And he had tapes on everybody. 586 00:33:00,500 --> 00:33:04,375 Anybody that walked into that bedroom, disrobed, 587 00:33:04,500 --> 00:33:07,542 they have a tape on them. They had a tape on them. 588 00:33:07,667 --> 00:33:11,250 They knew they were there, and it kept everybody in line. 589 00:33:11,375 --> 00:33:13,208 They were fearful of it. What if--What if they got out? 590 00:33:13,375 --> 00:33:15,958 What if somebody saw them? 591 00:33:17,375 --> 00:33:20,708 I didn't get over what-- what happened in that bedroom. 592 00:33:20,833 --> 00:33:22,500 [sighs] 593 00:33:22,583 --> 00:33:28,375 I was disappointed in myself that I... 594 00:33:28,500 --> 00:33:32,583 put myself in the position that he could have had access to me. 595 00:33:32,708 --> 00:33:38,000 I had tried so hard for so long to not be the stereotype. 596 00:33:38,083 --> 00:33:43,792 We all wanted to be the perfect girl, 597 00:33:43,875 --> 00:33:47,000 not the messed up girl, you know? 598 00:33:49,583 --> 00:33:52,917 [chuckles] Yeah, who walks around naked. 599 00:33:53,042 --> 00:33:54,500 [scoffs] 600 00:33:54,625 --> 00:33:59,708 But...I'm better than what happened to me. 601 00:33:59,833 --> 00:34:02,333 I'm valued. I'm loved. 602 00:34:02,458 --> 00:34:07,167 I'm very much expecting to go to heaven. 603 00:34:07,250 --> 00:34:14,542 And I very much think that I'm now safe in my home. 604 00:34:16,708 --> 00:34:19,792 ♪♪ 605 00:34:19,917 --> 00:34:22,000 10 years after I broke up with Hef, 606 00:34:22,083 --> 00:34:24,708 I had managed to get married, 607 00:34:24,875 --> 00:34:26,875 and I was a mom, 608 00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:32,000 and my life looked pretty nice on visual. 609 00:34:32,083 --> 00:34:33,792 I really loved being a mom. 610 00:34:33,875 --> 00:34:36,917 [voice breaking] I loved being a mom. 611 00:34:37,042 --> 00:34:39,250 ♪♪ 612 00:34:39,375 --> 00:34:42,958 For a long time, I spoke highly of Playboy. 613 00:34:43,042 --> 00:34:46,208 I could not have told anybody the truth. 614 00:34:46,333 --> 00:34:50,167 Every Easter we would come up for the Easter egg hunt 615 00:34:50,250 --> 00:34:51,917 'cause it was family-oriented. 616 00:34:52,042 --> 00:34:58,333 I had pushed everything so back so that my life could be normal. 617 00:34:58,458 --> 00:35:01,292 I realized that when it started getting dusk, 618 00:35:01,417 --> 00:35:04,125 it was like something inside me, a panic would start, 619 00:35:04,208 --> 00:35:07,542 and then I-I would want a glass of wine or something. 620 00:35:07,708 --> 00:35:09,792 I needed to buff out whatever was coming, 621 00:35:09,875 --> 00:35:14,583 and that's when thoughts would, like--like a Rolodex of pictures 622 00:35:14,708 --> 00:35:17,000 just going... [makes whirring sound] 623 00:35:17,083 --> 00:35:19,542 And things I had never thought about for years, 624 00:35:19,708 --> 00:35:22,750 moments that I wish had never happened, 625 00:35:22,875 --> 00:35:24,542 I'd get a flash. 626 00:35:24,667 --> 00:35:28,750 ♪♪ 627 00:35:30,542 --> 00:35:33,375 And the only way to fix that would be have a glass of wine, 628 00:35:33,500 --> 00:35:36,833 have a glass of wine, and then I could numb it. 629 00:35:36,917 --> 00:35:38,667 I didn't have to think about it. 630 00:35:38,750 --> 00:35:43,750 And I feel bad for my part in it that I could actually 631 00:35:43,875 --> 00:35:48,000 ask girls to go upstairs and have some cocaine with me. 632 00:35:48,083 --> 00:35:51,917 And I was--I was reeling them in for him, 633 00:35:52,042 --> 00:35:55,167 and believe me, I... 634 00:35:55,250 --> 00:35:58,458 if I could take it back, I would take it all back. 635 00:35:58,542 --> 00:36:01,000 ♪♪ 636 00:36:01,125 --> 00:36:05,208 I had this demon after me. 637 00:36:05,375 --> 00:36:08,708 I realized that I have to take what happened to me 638 00:36:08,833 --> 00:36:14,125 and make something good come out of it in the end. 639 00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:18,500 We can look at these. 640 00:36:18,583 --> 00:36:22,667 In 2011, Miki and I started talking, 641 00:36:22,792 --> 00:36:25,833 and once our eyes were open, there was no turning back. 642 00:36:25,917 --> 00:36:29,833 You wrote me this--this incredible, touching letter. 643 00:36:29,917 --> 00:36:33,833 What was so important to you was about the sex tape. 644 00:36:33,917 --> 00:36:35,583 -Yes. -Right. 645 00:36:35,708 --> 00:36:39,000 I told Miki, you know, I'm worried about these tapes 646 00:36:39,125 --> 00:36:41,125 and what--what's gonna happen to them. 647 00:36:41,208 --> 00:36:42,583 He was in his 80s. 648 00:36:42,708 --> 00:36:44,875 I mean, he could kick the bucket at any time. 649 00:36:45,042 --> 00:36:46,292 That's correct. 650 00:36:46,375 --> 00:36:48,417 And then who would have that key 651 00:36:48,542 --> 00:36:52,333 to open that panel and get to those tapes? 652 00:36:52,458 --> 00:36:55,167 -We were working against time. -Yeah. 653 00:36:55,292 --> 00:36:59,042 We started a letter-writing campaign in 2011. 654 00:36:59,167 --> 00:37:01,333 She helped me write the letters. 655 00:37:01,417 --> 00:37:04,375 And I think Miki and I were the first ones 656 00:37:04,500 --> 00:37:07,708 to just in his face, go after him about the tapes. 657 00:37:07,833 --> 00:37:09,792 We orchestrated this whole game plan 658 00:37:09,875 --> 00:37:12,208 of if a tape got out, 659 00:37:12,333 --> 00:37:17,333 we would hold Hef and/or Playboy accountable. 660 00:37:22,333 --> 00:37:25,583 You deserved an answer, and by God, we got it. 661 00:37:25,708 --> 00:37:28,583 Miki and I were the first one to nail him on the--on the tapes. 662 00:37:28,708 --> 00:37:32,125 We started a letter-writing campaign. 663 00:37:32,208 --> 00:37:35,333 We caught one of Hef's lawyers saying one thing 664 00:37:35,417 --> 00:37:37,792 and Hef saying another thing. 665 00:37:37,875 --> 00:37:39,583 That's when we had him. 666 00:37:39,708 --> 00:37:42,125 We had him, and he had-- he was forced 667 00:37:42,250 --> 00:37:45,292 to give us his last words on those tapes, 668 00:37:45,375 --> 00:37:48,458 and we know what happened to them. 669 00:37:48,542 --> 00:37:52,833 In the end, we got Hugh Hefner's last words. 670 00:37:52,917 --> 00:37:54,792 Yeah. 671 00:37:54,875 --> 00:37:56,958 On what happened to the sex tapes. Didn't we? 672 00:37:57,042 --> 00:37:59,125 Yeah. 673 00:37:59,208 --> 00:38:01,375 We were told that it would be taken care of, 674 00:38:01,500 --> 00:38:03,958 that Mary was in charge. 675 00:38:04,042 --> 00:38:07,625 And if anything happened to him, she knew what to do. 676 00:38:09,417 --> 00:38:11,958 That she was going to destroy the tapes. 677 00:38:12,042 --> 00:38:13,792 I do have reason to believe 678 00:38:13,875 --> 00:38:17,417 that one of the video department heads had a boat, 679 00:38:17,542 --> 00:38:19,708 and they put all of those video tapes, 680 00:38:19,875 --> 00:38:21,458 after they had been pulled from their cases, 681 00:38:21,583 --> 00:38:25,125 were then put in a barrel and taken to sea. 682 00:38:25,208 --> 00:38:26,625 That's what I was told was done with them, 683 00:38:26,708 --> 00:38:30,583 and I-I had reason to believe that was true. 684 00:38:30,708 --> 00:38:34,375 Even then, I didn't believe that he would destroy all of them. 685 00:38:34,500 --> 00:38:38,542 He just--His ego would not destroy all the tapes. 686 00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:41,583 No, no. 687 00:38:41,708 --> 00:38:44,875 Even after all our letters, there was no apology from him. 688 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:46,667 You'd get a pat on the back. 689 00:38:46,792 --> 00:38:50,500 "Don't worry. It'll all be okay." 690 00:38:50,583 --> 00:38:53,833 But no, he didn't apologize for anything. 691 00:38:53,958 --> 00:38:57,417 Hefner never wanted us to be friends, right? 692 00:38:57,542 --> 00:38:59,500 -Yeah. -And so then... 693 00:38:59,583 --> 00:39:00,667 Because you were crazy and dangerous. 694 00:39:00,792 --> 00:39:02,125 -I was crazy and dangerous. -Yeah. 695 00:39:02,208 --> 00:39:03,333 And now you've become crazy and dangerous. [laughs] 696 00:39:03,458 --> 00:39:04,667 Now we're both crazy and dangerous. 697 00:39:04,792 --> 00:39:05,917 All right. 698 00:39:06,042 --> 00:39:10,833 Miki has been there for me through so many things 699 00:39:10,917 --> 00:39:13,167 that I didn't have the support of my family, 700 00:39:13,250 --> 00:39:16,458 I didn't have the encouragement. 701 00:39:16,542 --> 00:39:22,292 To find Sondra after so many years in 2011, 702 00:39:22,375 --> 00:39:26,000 it was like striking gold, really. [laughs] 703 00:39:26,083 --> 00:39:27,875 All right. 704 00:39:29,792 --> 00:39:36,000 I didn't meet P.J. until... I think it was 2016. 705 00:39:36,125 --> 00:39:38,792 She asked me to partner with her in this group 706 00:39:38,875 --> 00:39:43,083 that she started, The Iconic Women of Playboy. 707 00:39:43,208 --> 00:39:47,333 She supported Sondra and I. She put herself out on a limb, 708 00:39:47,417 --> 00:39:49,583 and this is a woman who survived 709 00:39:49,708 --> 00:39:53,333 a brutal rape by Bill Cosby, Hefner's best friend. 710 00:39:53,417 --> 00:39:55,500 So it's the Bunny Mother, 711 00:39:55,583 --> 00:39:57,583 the Director of Playboy Promotions, 712 00:39:57,708 --> 00:39:59,833 and the girlfriend of Hefner's. 713 00:39:59,958 --> 00:40:01,875 It's the first time ever 714 00:40:02,000 --> 00:40:05,250 that all of these worlds collided together. 715 00:40:05,375 --> 00:40:07,625 -Hello? -Hi, Miki. It's P.J. 716 00:40:07,708 --> 00:40:09,667 Hi, P.J. 717 00:40:09,750 --> 00:40:14,208 In the end, we're just damn lucky we got out of there 718 00:40:14,333 --> 00:40:15,917 as normal as we could be... [laughs] 719 00:40:16,042 --> 00:40:18,708 because not one of us is normal. Not one of us. 720 00:40:18,833 --> 00:40:23,042 It may be too late to do much about us, 721 00:40:23,167 --> 00:40:25,542 but that shouldn't stop us. 722 00:40:25,667 --> 00:40:28,750 I'm sure with this documentary, 723 00:40:28,875 --> 00:40:30,708 there's gonna be a lot of women 724 00:40:30,833 --> 00:40:32,500 that have come out of the woodwork with stories 725 00:40:32,583 --> 00:40:36,000 that we haven't heard about yet. 726 00:40:36,083 --> 00:40:41,125 I hope that by coming out with this that maybe other girls 727 00:40:41,208 --> 00:40:43,375 can say, finally, you know, 728 00:40:43,500 --> 00:40:45,667 they acknowledge that there was wrong 729 00:40:45,750 --> 00:40:47,375 and maybe they can let go of that nightmare. 730 00:40:47,500 --> 00:40:50,208 I think women are getting a bit smarter. 731 00:40:50,333 --> 00:40:53,542 I think they'll smell the rat. 732 00:40:53,667 --> 00:40:57,375 Now is the time. We've got Me Too and Time's Up. 733 00:40:57,542 --> 00:40:58,750 For God's sakes, 734 00:40:58,875 --> 00:41:01,167 it's time for the Playboy women to come forward. 735 00:41:01,292 --> 00:41:05,500 It's amazing that nobody ever talked 736 00:41:05,625 --> 00:41:07,458 among their selves about it. 737 00:41:07,542 --> 00:41:10,375 I think Hef just knew we wouldn't 738 00:41:10,500 --> 00:41:14,167 because we sort of were suspicious of each other, 739 00:41:14,333 --> 00:41:16,250 but it's gotta be told. 740 00:41:16,375 --> 00:41:20,500 I can't really explain to you 741 00:41:20,583 --> 00:41:22,667 how strong the feeling was in me 742 00:41:22,792 --> 00:41:24,500 that I needed to get my story out, 743 00:41:24,583 --> 00:41:28,083 so I wouldn't feel bound to be living this lie 744 00:41:28,208 --> 00:41:30,917 where I constantly have to apologize for him 745 00:41:31,042 --> 00:41:33,542 or say he's great or say things were great 746 00:41:33,667 --> 00:41:34,833 when I was there, when they weren't. 747 00:41:34,917 --> 00:41:39,042 I don't have a problem with speaking the truth. 748 00:41:39,167 --> 00:41:42,500 If people can't handle the truth, I don't know what to say. 749 00:41:42,583 --> 00:41:46,667 Coming forward, I think will be a cleansing for me. 750 00:41:46,792 --> 00:41:49,333 It's very difficult to think of all my skeletons 751 00:41:49,458 --> 00:41:52,500 in everybody's living room right now. 752 00:41:52,583 --> 00:41:55,333 Nobody wants to reveal their secrets, 753 00:41:55,417 --> 00:41:57,500 but I wanted to make a difference. 754 00:41:57,583 --> 00:41:59,833 It's got to make a difference. 755 00:41:59,958 --> 00:42:03,500 I'm hurt. 756 00:42:03,625 --> 00:42:06,125 And I can't be alone in this pain. 757 00:42:06,208 --> 00:42:07,667 I know I'm not. 758 00:42:07,792 --> 00:42:11,167 There are too many of us, and I want to write some of it. 759 00:42:11,250 --> 00:42:14,958 I want it to go away, and eventually, maybe it will. 760 00:42:15,083 --> 00:42:18,000 If enough women tell me that it helped, 761 00:42:18,125 --> 00:42:19,833 maybe it will go away. 762 00:42:19,917 --> 00:42:23,042 ♪♪ 763 00:42:23,167 --> 00:42:26,667 Every man in the world would say, "I want to be Hugh Hefner." 764 00:42:26,750 --> 00:42:30,292 They thought he had the good life. 765 00:42:30,375 --> 00:42:38,500 Hefner was a sexual predator that didn't care who he damaged. 766 00:42:38,625 --> 00:42:43,375 It was all about his power and his prestige. 767 00:42:43,500 --> 00:42:46,917 We pulled the curtain back, Wizard. 768 00:42:47,042 --> 00:42:50,667 We know who you are. We know who you were.