[groaning]
[kidnapper 1] Three pieces of copper?
That's not enough for how far we came.
[groaning continues]
What am I supposed to do with this? It's a half-dead orc. Huh?
[kidnapper 1] It's actually amazing when it talks.
[merchant] Take it somewhere else then.
Damn it.
Oh, well. What about this scrubber then?
How much is this worth?
Well, it's so filthy.
120 copper pieces.
That much?
Whoa. Is he on clearance or something?
UNCLE: YOU'RE FINE THE WAY YOU ARE
GET HOME
SOLD CHEAPER THAN A SCOURING PAD
[Uncle] What? I'm worth less than a scrubber?
[Fujimiya] Huh? How did you not know?
[gasps]
[groans]
Huh? What's wrong with you two?
It's probably the memory forgetting spell.
I just remembered it.
Oh!
[Takafumi] Yeah, I read the page of your notebook.
I just remembered that.
Huh?
Ms. Fujimiya. Could you read the beginning of this notebook, please?
This notebook's seen better days.
[both] Huh? Just the beginning!
Mmm.
"Sold to a merchant for less than a scrubber."
[Takafumi groans]
[Uncle] It must be the first painful memory I erased after learning the spell.
I don't blame you.
It's pretty embarrassing to be sold at a doorbuster price.
Seems like an erased memory comes back when you stumble across it again.
First you get a nosebleed,
and then the memory spirits warn you that going forward is very dangerous.
But there are cases like this, you can't do anything about.
Shouldn't spirits have a better warning system?
-[kidnapper 1] Are you okay? -Huh?
[kidnapper 2] Nah, I'm tired.
[kidnapper 3] My shoulder is killing me.
[Uncle] Huh?
[Takafumi] At least it's over.
[creatures growling]
[groans]
[monsters squeal]
[Uncle] He took me into his basement and threw me in a freak show pen.
I'm gonna skip ahead.
[Takafumi] Huh? But why?
[Uncle] Well, the shopkeeper completely forgot about me down there.
GET HOME
[both groan]
If I didn't have that rainwater to drink on the third day, I would've died.
A light that pierces through the darkness.
Must be Voltteccer.
Did you know,
you actually pronounce the ultimate move
for Pulseman on the Mega Drive as "Voltteccer".
Yeah, you're supposed to roll your tongue.
It's a beautiful, powerful move
that can infinitely bounce around a room if there were walls.
Speaking of Pulseman, they broke new territory during the cyberspace…
-Huh? Oh, no. -Yeah, he's lost it.
-[monologue continues] -Oh. No, no, no.
I was talking to the moonlight to maintain my sanity.
I mean, can't you tell by looking at my face,
how I'm totally in my right mind?
It's genius.
-Yeah, sure, man. -[monologue continues]
… that have a new hit called Pocket Monsters.
But I know they're going to come back and make a Pulseman 2 for a SEGA system.
The Voltteccer ultimate move transformed his whole body into invincible light.
Yeah. He became just about as strong and beautiful
as this light beam, I'd imagine.
Huh? What do you mean "thank you"?
No, no, no, no. This isn't just flattery.
This is how I actually feel about it.
It's the most beautiful thing I've seen in this world.
[gasps]
Oh, no. Who's there?
[breathing shakily]
The will of the light itself.
The spirit of light, Kilighd.
Casting…
a language?
Kilighd l'gid riolran.
A light sword?
This is the first spell that I ever cast.
It's how I escaped that place.
Uncle, so the person you were mumbling to, that was--
Oh, yeah. That was the spirit of the light.
There are spirits of everything, like wind and fire…
How were you able to talk to the spirits?
-Oh! It's translation. -Mm-hmm.
[Fujimiya] You spoke to the spirits
through the translation ability that god gave you.
Yeah.
That's probably the secret behind why your magic is so strong.
Way back in Luvaldram,
it looked like you were the only one who could speak to those spirits.
Wait, that makes total sense then.
So that's why I couldn't relate to other people when we talked about magic.
-Mmm… -Mmm…
But maybe if I was better at communicating,
I would've known it's that.
[Takafumi] Yeah.
Wait. Then why did you think
you could suddenly understand the language and use magic?
[Uncle] Hmm?
Simple.
I have the ability to play games in English,
even though I have no idea what they're saying.
-So I figured it was my adaptability… -[SEGA logo theme plays]
…from years of playing SEGA. See?
[Takafumi] Nah, man. That's dumb.
[Fujimiya] Seriously, go touch some grass or something.
[Fujimiya] So what happened after all that?
[Uncle] Oh, right.
I used the Light Sword to escape my own cell.
[monsters squeal]
Then I freed all the small monsters he was holding there as well.
[monster squeals]
Oh, so cute!
You tamed him! He's a great little mascot.
[Uncle] No.
[screams]
That little thing went straight for my jugular.
-Deadly. -Deadly.
[grunts, breathing shakily]
[monsters growl]
[Uncle shrieks]
[stammers] Help me!
What the hell is this?
Evil rat beasts, death wolves, flying birds.
All the worst monsters from the East are on the loose!
[screams]
Help me!
-[merchant screams] -[heartbeat thumping]
[chiptune shrieking]
[breathes heavily]
[stammers] Am I just an NPC?
Am I supposed to wander around this world, nameless forever?
Or am I…
[creature roars]
Regsuuid zaldohna!
[sighs heavily]
Thank you. You saved me--
Yeah, I did a good job.
[shrieks]
-[screaming] -[Uncle] Don't worry.
Everything's going to be okay.
I need to transfer my wound.
Set coordinate!
[screaming continues]
[growling, breathing shakily]
[monsters growling]
[grunts]
[groans]
[Uncle] And so I just fought all night long.
[both whimper]
[Uncle] When the fighting was over, I was…
Ha-ha.
Baraib garl.
[Uncle sighs]
[sighs, chuckles]
-Mmm. -Mmm.
[Uncle] I was grateful to all those monsters
whose meat fed my broken body.
Anyway, I know that the 17 years I spent in the Other World
was full of painful experiences.
But you can see that I got one hell of a good start at least, huh?
[Takafumi] Uh, what?
[Fujimiya] You're considering that a success?
I still can't believe I was less expensive than a scrubber.
-[cell phone vibrates] -[Fujimiya] Hmm?
[sighs] I'm sorry, you guys.
We're having chicken tonight, and you know what?
Mama's gotta get her tasty wings.
Yeah, let's pick this up another time.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, nothing really good happened after this part of the story anyway.
[Fujimiya] Huh?
[Takafumi] Uh, worse than this?
[Fujimiya] Out of curiosity, what happened?
Oh. I mean, not that much honestly.
I just saved that Elf from a dragon.
And even though I went out of my way for her,
she just yelled and insulted me the whole time.
[Takafumi] What do you mean? That's a really important part!
[Fujimiya] I actually wanna hear this story!
FIRE, IGNITE
[Fujimiya] Mm-hmm, eat without me. Okay.
It's done.
Now tell me a cool story to make up for missing mama's fried chicken.
Ah. You just wait.
This was my battle against the legendary Venom Dragon.
Watch this!
[Venom Dragon roars]
Look, I won.
[shouts] That's it?
Fried, fried chicken…
[Takafumi] Your magic was strong enough to kill the dragon in one hit?
[Uncle] Yeah. Normally, it would be impossible
to kill it so quickly.
Hold on.
But I saw that the Elf was focusing her attacks on this one spot.
So that's what I aimed for.
If she had tried a little harder, she would've beaten it by herself.
[footsteps approach]
[groans]
Orc.
[gasps]
Oh. I didn't-- I didn't see anything.
I promise, okay. And I'm not an orc.
Is it on yet?
And you know how to use a zipper, don't you?
My apologies, Lord swordsman.
Nah, you're good. Don't worry about it.
It's only natural to wanna save someone in danger.
[Uncle chuckles]
Hmm?
My, how unsightly.
It's very clear to me that you're an evil orc.
So ugly.
And ugliness cannot go without punishment.
Oh, she's nuts.
Something broke the tsundere girl.
Where did that knife come from?
[gasps, stammers] What am I doing?
Uh, I'm sorry.
Wait, don't do that!
You okay?
Huh?
[shrieks] What the hell are you doing?
-[Uncle] You're cut. I have to bandage it. -[Elf] I'm not cut.
I'm totally fine, you idiot.
[whimpers]
[Uncle] Huh? You're not hurt?
Your skin's flawless.
But where did the knife go?
-Is it here? Or here? -[shrieks]
[Uncle] Watch it!
I'll-- I'll remember this.
I've burnt your ugly orc face into my brain forever!
I'll pay you back for this humiliation.
But seriously, you're sure you're okay?
Stay away from me, you dirty orc.
Pig, pig, pig. You're an ugly little pig, orc.
Smooth move, you creepy old pervert.
No. You know, in my experience
it just stirs people up even more when you try to argue with them.
I'd rather just take it.
[Takafumi] I can't imagine what going to school was like for him.
[Uncle] So, this was the moment,
when the Elf began to stalk me.
She stole my hoodie and insulted me every time I would see her.
She didn't even help me when I was frozen.
She hated me.
Oh, speaking of being frozen.
Whatever happened after you thawed?
Hmm? Oh.
Something like this.
[Uncle groans] My body's so heavy.
Is that because of the ice?
[person giggling]
-What is this soft feeling? -[giggling continues]
[screams]
[Elf moans]
[whimpers]
What are you two doing in my bed?
[stammers] In the North, there are tribes who stay warm with animal viscera.
You seemed cold, so I warmed you up. What's wrong with that?
[Fujimiya] Oh, please.
[Takafumi] Come on. There's no way, man.
I understand. Okay, that makes sense.
-[Takafumi] You're kidding. -[Fujimiya] No way!
[Uncle] Well, it is pretty cold in here.
I might just sleep in to make sure I don't get sick, you know.
And I'll sleep next to you since you're so cold.
So are you gonna use me instead of animal viscera?
Fine, have it your way then.
[Elf exhales sharply]
[giggles]
[Mabel moans]
[stutters] What the hell is this now?
[Elf growls]
[Mabel] Mama.
Mama.
No.
[inhales sharply]
[Mabel] Mama.
[cries] Mama.
[sobs, whimpers]
You poor--
Please, no.
I can't do manual labor.
You said life would be super easy.
I'd just be able to live off of the god-freezing sword forever.
I don't want to go to work and sweat, Mama.
Mama, why did you run away with that young man when I was just nine?
[sobbing continues]
[sniffles]
-[thuds] -[yelps]
[gasps]
[Mabel] Why did you hit me?
S-- Sorry. You just kept screaming about not wanting to go to work.
[stammers] What? No way.
I wanna work. I can't wait to go to work.
What are you talking about? Manual labor is so noble to me.
-[Elf] You're clearly lying. -[whimpers]
I already told you that you won't have to work a day
if you just sell off the ring I gave you.
[Elf] Right! Just go ahead and sell it.
[sighs]
But I need to make it on my own.
Manual labor is for suckers.
Uh, and pawn shops are intimidating.
I can negotiate for you.
Mmm… [groans]
I shouldn't. I should save it to be my last resort if I end up on the street.
Oh, okay. That sounds like a good plan.
Well, why don't you have the Elf take care of you for a little bit then?
Huh?
[Uncle] You must have money from your ring still.
Well, I put it all in the bank.
MABEL - MANU
-[dog whimpers] -Oh.
In that case… [howls]
-I'm yours, Master. -Huh?
[Mabel gasps]
[Mabel stutters] Never mind…
Please stop. You're embarrassing yourself.
Hey, let's go eat.
It's all on me today. Let's have a little feast, okay?
Oh. [barks]
Mmm, I just remembered. I haven't introduced myself.
I am Mabel Rayveil.
I am a descendant of the Ice clan, and now, an aspiring adventurer.
And you are?
[Elf] I guess you can--
Just call me Elf.
I'm the only elf to venture outside of my homeland.
My mission here is to locate and recover ancient artifacts.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Wolfgunblood.
-You liar! -That's what you came up with?
I'm an adventurer searching for a way back to my homeland.
Nice to meet you.
-[Mabel] Ah. -What's with the fake name?
Hmm? I mean, who goes around telling strangers their real name?
[Takafumi] But you've known the Elf for three years now.
[Fujimiya] I mean, it almost makes sense.
Okay. I'm going to make my way to Ikoza.
[Uncle] Ikoza? Oh, the town you sold your ring at?
I don't remember there being any noticeable dungeons around there.
[stutters] Shut up! I'm free to do whatever I want.
You dumb, crude, orc jerk!
[Takafumi] Yeah, she's gonna buy back the ring.
[Fujimiya] Well, someone's feeling jealous.
[Mabel stutters] Wolfgunblood.
What? Where?
Oh, right. That's me.
W-- What are you going to do today?
There's a hero attempting to clear a nearby dungeon.
I thought I'd check in.
A legendary hero?
Hasn't been one of those in 50 years.
I heard that they were granted that title
after taking down an army of legion-class monsters.
That's a wildly impossible task.
Oh, no way. Wow.
I could go with you, Wolfgunblood.
[gasps]
But I'm more of a night owl.
I'll go back to sleep and wake up around 2:00 p.m.
And after that, I should be ready to leave around five.
What?
[Uncle] Anyway, that was the day.
[Fujimiya] The party disbanded?
[Takafumi] Mabel is too much of a NEET to keep up with either of them.
Huh? Speaking of five in the evening,
it's getting pretty late.
This Fujimiya should go home.
[stomach rumbles]
I should've chosen the fried chicken.
Oh, are you two hungry?
Who wants to get some ramen? It's on me.
-For real life? -Oh, really? You sure?
[coins jingle]
Yeah, of course.
-Yippee! -Yippee!
[Takafumi] Uncle's life in the Other World was kind of a living hell.
There weren't any decent gods around, but…
at least he had the Elf and Mabel.
The ramen was really amazing.
[all slurping]
Maybe even the best.
SO GOOD!
He was a little short though. Fujimiya paid the difference.
[slurping continues]