PEDESTRIANS AND BICYCLES ONLY
2017, fall.
NURSE STATION PATIENT ROOMS
My uncle was struck by a truck when he was 17.
After 17 years of being in a coma…
he awoke.
Irellars Granbahamal tona galtoeba rilex.
He had gone insane.
Yes, well…
Japanese?
Sorry about that.
I just came back from spending 17 years in Granbahamal.
Let's check your temperature.
Zalbe madira kolstonam kolstonam.
Isn't that right?
Del storba tona rabelt gal.
All right, see you during the next round.
You must be Takafumi, my sister's kid.
You've grown up.
Where is everyone?
After you fell into a coma,
the family fought bitterly over what to do with you until it fell apart.
Honestly speaking, my mom would rather not see you.
MY FAMILY FELL APART DUE TO FIGHTING OVER ME
Icuras cuora.
Well then,
let me prove to you that I lived in another world.
What? No, thanks.
War-grent seld.
SPRING WATER
What?
War-grent magna!
War-grent rald!
-This is hard to watch… -War-grent neld!
War-grent gad!
War-grent pad!
-You know… -War-grent larch!
…the economic decline has been hard on me, too.
I work part-time to support myself.
I brought papers for you to apply for self-reliance support and whatnot.
Wind, lift!
No way!
Wind, return.
Japanese works in this world.
It's true.
Anyway, were you about to hit me with harsh reality just now?
-Nope. -You sure?
What did you do just now?
Magic.
Fire.
That's amazing! How do you do that?
Never mind it.
Who's winning the Console War? Is it SEGA?
What?
SEGA? Nowadays?
In Japan, Sony and Nintendo dominate the industry.
What? What about SEGA?
-Is that something you need to know-- -What about SEGA?
Well… it gave up making consoles a good while ago.
Icuras cuora.
What does "icuras cuora" do?
This spell erases memories.
I use it when things get unbearable.
Is SEGA's decline such a big shock to him?
The other world was fraught with difficulties.
Want to take a look?
Oh, sure.
Make me forget everything I read just now.
I told you.
Spirits of memory, deliver unto oblivion.
SEGA's decline truly was heart-wrenching to him.
One week later…
I decided to make a living by making money off of my uncle's powers.
ANOTHER WORLD - LIGHTSABER
I uploaded videos on YouTube
and earned about 60,000 yen from ads.
UNCLE: YOU'RE FINE THE WAY YOU ARE
GET HOME
SOLD CHEAPER THAN A SCOURING PAD
I shouldn't say this, since I'm crashing, but isn't this unit too big for just you?
Yeah, I used to share this room with someone else,
but I had troubles with them.
A roommate? Was it a girlfriend?
Well, no…
Wow…
No, it's called a room share! Haven't you heard of it?
No.
HISTORY OF ROOM SHARE
There was no such thing 17 years ago?
Wow, you looked that up in seconds.
Electronic dictionaries sure have evolved.
Yep… Wait, what?
Little Takafumi…
is old enough to recruit friends and live with them.
What were your friends like in the other world?
I basically played solo for 17 years.
Is that right…
Everyone over there is good-looking.
They're all handsome men and beautiful women.
That's great.
I must have looked ugly…
I was hunted down as an orc variant.
Uncle, hold on.
-Then-- -It's too heavy!
I don't want to hear this while washing the dishes.
That's how it usually went, but some were particularly aggressive.
I told you to wait!
They followed me around every day and pestered and harassed me.
No matter what I did, they made fun of me and wouldn't let me be who I am.
How horrible…
So that's the reality of a parallel world fantasy life.
I saved her life when I met her. She didn't even thank me.
She sounds like the worst.
Right?
She said, "No one asked for your help. Don't touch me!
Don't misinterpret it. I didn't save you for your sake.
I must be the only one who can stand being with an orc face like you!"
She berated me to no end.
I got rid of her in some city and took off.
Don't touch me!
Don't misinterpret me!
I must be the only one who can stand being with an orc face like you.
The concept of tsundere became popular around 2004.
Four years after my uncle left for the other world.
What happened to her afterwards?
What? Who knows?
Anyway, my life didn't go well in the other world, either.
But now I've come back,
there's the Internet, optical fiber, and even "wii-fii"!
This is great!
With videos, even I can connect with people from around the world.
What?
EVEN A 5TH GRADER LIKE ME CAN TELL HOW FAKE THIS IS.
SUCH AMATEUR EDITING. IS IT A BAD JOKE?
My uncle, who returned from the other world…
LOLOL - MAD FACE UNCLE
…stepped into a brand-new world, the Internet.
What? How can they see my face?
-Maybe through this tiny lens? -It's what people say on the Internet.
A "sock puppet"? I'm not a hoax!
Those are commonly used phrases. Nothing more.
Hey, why is "LOL" everywhere?
He doesn't know how to deal with haters yet.
MEMORY INTO OBLIVION - THANKS
USED - GOOD
I want this cell phone.
It doesn't open up but slides around.
Uncle, that one's a 2G.
Can I buy it through this online auction?
You can't make calls on it since it uses an outdated radio wave.
That's fine. I don't care about calls.
What about your junior high and high school friends?
Takafumi,
a man who chooses SEGA console cannot live an ordinary life.
PERSONAL OPINION
Why do game consoles dictate so much of his life?
That one looks like the cheapest option.
You already researched it.
Those smartphones may be tiny, but they sure are powerful.
You'll soon get the hang of it.
"Touch," "swipe," "pinch out"…
For now, I want a phone with lots of buttons.
Yeah?
But the cool ones that open up, slide, or spin around are all gone.
Technological innovation. Everyone uses touch panel phones now.
That's 17 years of innovation.
Actually, I made a technological advancement in the other world.
What did you invent?
I created a vase that poured out water in a drought-stricken village.
Awesome! How did you do that?
I used two spells to…
It'll be easier to show you my memory.
Icuras elran.
This image!
It's your memory from the other world!
These magic-storing cards are called talismans.
I'll forgo the details, but it worked by reversing the water electrolysis process.
Modern science is undefeated!
Uncle, you dominated the other world.
The people must have sung your praises and revered you.
Not really.
They tried to hang me.
The vase, smashed to smithereens.
It wasn't acceptable in their religion.
Hold it!
Someone came to rescue you.
Yeah, that's the girl bent on harassing me.
This girl?
Yes, he has an evil countenance. He is more like an orc than a man.
I don't blame you for distrusting him, however--
War-grent grakka.
That was rough…
That's how it went.
Sorry.
It's hard to see from the first-person view.
That bothers you?
Swipe it like this to turn the camera.
-Here we go. -How is that possible?
Pinch in to make it smaller.
They almost hunted you down.
Can we see what happened to that girl?
Sure. Let's pinch out to enlarge.
There she is.
That coward…
He ran away.
Goodness…
What a kind girl! She's also super beautiful!
That's right, I'm a coward.
END OF AUCTION NOTIFICATION
Yes, the auction.
TIME LEFT
It's about to end!
PLACE A BID
I'm placing a bid!
What's the shipping cost?
What?
AUCTION ENDED - CONGRATULATIONS! YOU WON!
CHECK YOUR TRANSACTION
BID WON - 1,600 YEN, SHIPMENT FEE - 2,000 YEN
The shipping is 2,000 yen.
It's shipped from a remote island I've never heard of.
We don't have to pay for shipping if we pick it up in person.
What?
Uncle!
I'll be back soon.
30 MINUTES LATER
I'm back.
Uncle…
How do you like this headphone?
-Where is it auctioned from? -Kumamoto.
Five minutes tops.
How about this couch?
Too heavy to haul around.
I'll give you a shoulder massage afterward.
Well, okay then.
My uncle learned how to buy online with free shipping.
Thank you.
I could have gone to get it.
This rice was on a special discount on Amazon.
Can you grab me a knife?
-Here you go. -Thanks.
What's this? Where'd you get it?
Dimensional storage.
Also, this. It's for slaying dragons, so handle with caution.
You had that at the hospital.
Do you have anything else from the other world?
Certainly.
I have this magic sword.
My deposit…
I have precious metals, too.
This crystallization of mermaid's tears was crafted with magic.
This ring is sculpted from rainbow coral.
This gem alone can pay to build a castle in the other world.
Let's sell it!
Fifty yen.
I took it to a pawn shop.
It was appraised for 50 yen.
It's a bit too rare.
Our views aren't growing.
We need a breakthrough.
Uncle,
did you have this ring because you meant to gift it to someone?
Not really. Gems are more like memorabilia.
They can only be obtained after beating challenging dungeons.
Is that so?
You want to talk about relationships?
Not really. You don't seem interested in that kind of thing. So, no thanks.
Cut the nonsense. I've lived for over 30 years.
That comes with experience.
I met my first love in grade school.
What were they like?
They were Sonic and Tails.
What?
I stopped by the toy shop's display window every day and spent hours watching the TV.
The title scene was so cute, I never got tired of it.
Do you have any experience involving people?
Of course I do.
Kaede Nanase was a good friend of mine.
The enemy group's leader murdered her.
She was then revived as a living machine.
They relentlessly attack her to obtain the salvation weapon Seven Force.
Stage three's boss is the fifth form of…
Does he have any experience outside of video games in his life?
Did you meet any girls in the other world?
-I did. -What?
Icuras elran.
Thank you very much.
And that's how I saved her from a monster.
More like she offered her life in exchange for her brothers'.
Wasn't that smooth?
Immediately afterward, I was struck from a blind spot by some goblins.
They threw me off a cliff, and that was that.
What a disaster.
The two brothers snuck behind him with terrifying looks on their faces.
Let's check how that ambush occurred.
I'm sure they were goblins.
-Yeah? -Yeah, absolutely!
I was on the brink of death when she stumbled into me.
I hate to say this, but she saved me.
You…
Why did you…
Don't you misunderstand.
You are indebted to me now.
Spend the rest of your life bowing to me.
The rest of my life?
What?
That's not what I meant.
I didn't mean "together forever" or anything.
W-what? Stay away from me!
I'd rather not owe you a huge favor.
-Will this do? -What?
What?
It's a cosmite ring, said to be one of the only seven in existence.
What are you doing?
How does it fit?
Wait, hold on!
It's too sudden…
Do you not want it?
I do…
My uncle is about to do something outrageous!
Was that okay to do?
Looks like it means the same in the other world. Did you take responsibility?
Of course I did.
I was responsible enough to have it redeemed at the next town.
Uncle!
You said you dodged her in some town. So it was this one.
No. She kept following me around.
Maybe she got a taste for money.
I deposited it at a bank. Where are you going next?
What? You'll stay here for now? What a coincidence. Me, too!
She's resilient.
As you can see,
these kinds of rare items can be useful on many occasions.
Let's stash that knife in here.
Sure.
UNCLE!?
My uncle's new video surpassed 2,000,000 views.
I'M ALIVE
2017, fall.
My new life with my uncle
had just begun.
Subtitle translation by: Minoru Nishikawa