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‎NETFLIX 原創影集

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‎地球上沒有一個城市
‎像伊州芝加哥那麼酷

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‎這個城市的傳奇人物非常屌

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‎他們都只需要一個名字

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‎歐普拉、迪卡、小丑寶佐

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‎還有我，黛安

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‎人們常說芝加哥是肩負重任的城市

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‎我就是城市的嗨咖大姊

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‎這個城市和我一樣經歷過不少風雨

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‎但它永遠都有方法捲土重來

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‎像在1871年

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‎整個城市被燒成平地

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‎我們沒有哭

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‎我們立馬把整個城市重建了

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‎然後又有禁酒令

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‎當國家說市民不能喝酒

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‎我們說：“去死吧，給我來雙份”

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‎因為在芝加哥

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‎我們都是做大事的，寶貝

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‎事實上
‎芝加哥不管做甚麼都非常盛大

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‎我們的派對是整個社區一起開的

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‎而我住在芝加哥中
‎最正的社區，瑞格利村

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‎大家可以盡情享樂

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‎當你喝到吐

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‎永遠都會有人幫你拉起頭髮

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‎就是我，而老娘要盡情狂歡！

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‎黛安…

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‎黛安…

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‎-黛安…
‎-黛安…

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‎黛安…

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‎醒醒啊！

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‎該死的，科特
‎不要在我夢中開趴時把我叫醒

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‎這樣做很危險的

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‎天啊，小黛
‎真不知道妳昨晚發甚麼神經

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‎但妳回家後

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‎把我爸在海王行動中
‎留下來的白蘭地喝掉

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‎接著妳抽煙後又忘了關窗

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‎布特庫斯差點掉出窗外了

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‎你本來就不該養牠來當寵物

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‎我在爬行動物的失物招領處找到牠的

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‎這個可憐的傢伙
‎吞了18個放滿海洛因的安全套

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‎有甚麼大不了，我們都去過墨西哥

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‎幹嘛今天氣噗噗的？類固醇爆發嗎？

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‎黛安，昨天是我們的週年紀念

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‎我知道啊

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‎所以我給你買了…

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‎艾爾牛肉三明治！

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‎都被妳吃光了

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‎袋子裡還有幾根薯條

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‎我不要放軟的薯條

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‎我想老婆記得
‎我們第二次結婚的週年紀念

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‎冷靜，菲爾傑克森…

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‎黛安，我已經老得
‎不適合過這樣的生活了

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‎根據我的家族病史與過高的膽固醇

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‎我早在五年前就該死了

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‎科特，拜托，我們經常都是這樣

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‎你生氣，說要離開

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‎然後憤怒地來一次
‎“我含你舔”就沒事了

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‎快點把旅行包放下，拿些濕紙巾…

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‎這次不會，我受夠了

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‎這不是像麥可喬丹在1993年退役那樣

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‎而是1998年的真正退役

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‎祝你能找到比我更好的女人囉！

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‎（公牛隊）

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‎（關門大吉）

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‎禮拜一早上就被甩真是有衰的

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‎禮拜一？糟糕了，今天是禮拜二

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‎今天是我外甥生日

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‎親愛的，生日快樂，怎麼樣？

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‎-嗨，黛安阿姨
‎-大聲說

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‎-現在不方便
‎-大聲說

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‎怎麼樣？

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‎你終於18歲了！

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‎知道老娘18歲的時候在做甚麼嗎？

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‎跟吉姆貝魯什做愛

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‎他還一邊做一邊吹口琴

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‎黛安阿姨，我現在不方便…

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‎喂，打躲避球期間不能打電話

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‎我可以選清潔工來打嗎？

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‎不，你一定要選丹尼爾

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‎歐巴馬，真是謝你全家

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‎好，親愛的，愛你哦

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‎搞甚麼？

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‎喂，史塔佛呢？

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‎妳說甚麼？

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‎史塔佛

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‎矮小的希臘人，一字眉
‎旁邊咖啡店的店主

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‎噢，我們把那棟建築買下了

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‎“創意飲料”正在擴張

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‎對了，我是羽哥，其中一位健康專員

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‎（羽哥：笑、愛、豐盛人生）

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‎嗨，請問鹼性水放在哪裡？

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‎在奇亞籽旁邊

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‎若見到芹菜牛奶，那就是走太遠囉

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‎美女，妳知道我都喝甚麼嗎？

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‎直接從密西根湖抽出來的自來水

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‎密西根湖的大腸桿菌超標

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‎美女，拉肚子不用怕

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‎能讓妳保持苗條，雖然妳已經很瘦了

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‎天啊，妳身材真好

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‎言歸正傳，羽哥

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‎給我一杯特大的半咖啡
‎半鮮奶油、半代糖

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‎杯緣要有壓碎的頭痛藥

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‎聽起來妳是怕發炎呢

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‎我介紹小姐妳可以喝大麻二酚拿鐵

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‎喝完嗨不起來的大麻，不了

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‎（芝城體育理髮店）

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‎姊妹們，暫停手邊的工作

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‎我要休息一天，科特離棄我了

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‎不是吧，你們週年紀念的翌日？

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‎就是嘛，真是個渣男

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‎妳沒有跟他“互口”嗎？

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‎-爽一發就沒事了吧？
‎-蘇珊娜，妳以為我沒試過嗎？

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‎我要取消所有預約

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‎蒂娜，把塔羅牌拿出來，我要占卜

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‎蘇珊，鱷魚鞋脫掉，幫我踩背

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‎對了，我們有得分嗎？

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‎該死的，付費頻道沒了

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‎蘇珊娜，鞋子先別脫，給我上屋頂

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‎黛安，新來的經理說
‎工作期間不能再看小熊隊比賽

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‎噢，新來的經理喔

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‎那個從紐約來，愛擺架子的臭傢伙？

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‎那些人吃慣的披薩特別薄
‎貝果特別大

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‎那個紐約屎的臭傢伙來到

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‎老娘就告訴他
‎這裡是芝城體育理髮店

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‎我們由芝加哥的體壇
‎與定義一眾運動員的髮型建構而成

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‎在這個店裡，在那個螢幕上

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‎只要小熊隊上陣

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‎我們勢必觀戰

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‎黛安，這位是我們的新經理吉迪恩

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‎我來自…妳剛才怎麼說的，紐約屎？

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‎言歸正傳，我們開始營業吧

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‎45分鐘前早就營業中了

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‎好極了，我錯過了甚麼？

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‎我剛才告訴蒂娜和蘇珊娜
‎我們店的要大改造

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‎這些椅子，通通換掉

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‎電視將會播放靜音的MV

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‎而且本店不再收取現金

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‎好，但你要記得

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‎我們芝城體育理髮店還蠻舊派的

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‎-博羅
‎-甚麼？

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‎本店已被重新命名為博羅

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‎這是我們在紐約以外的第一間分店

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‎太棒了

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‎今天真是充滿極端改變的一天

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‎恕我失陪，我要去上個廁所

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‎-去你媽的，把車匙交出來
‎-不要殺我

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‎我的手機和錢包都拿去吧！

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‎我的個人密碼是84…

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‎天啊，黛安，我不喜歡妳這樣玩

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‎馬克，來到這個大城市
‎就得承受這樣的風險囉

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‎爸，你被她嚇到了

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‎壽星仔來囉！

154
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‎噢，我給你買了禮物

155
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‎拿起來喝，四角褲會移開
‎之後你就可以看到大衛的雞…

156
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‎黛安，他才18歲

157
00:07:01,543 --> 00:07:04,209
‎-我知道，到合法喝酒的年齡了
‎-那不是…

158
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‎黛安阿姨，這份禮物也蠻恰當的

159
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‎我們要去藝術館
‎看漢娜布萊克的影像裝置藝術

160
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‎重塑文藝復興時期的大師級作品

161
00:07:13,459 --> 00:07:15,584
‎但我們要先去帕爾瑪飯店

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‎遜爆了

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‎說到遜爆，我姊呢？

164
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‎她…

165
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‎黛安，妳最近好嗎？

166
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‎妳的頭髮看起來很…一致

167
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‎馬克，你瞞不過我的
‎你每次撒謊皮膚都會由白變粉

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‎好吧，她在樓上

169
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‎是北岸的邪惡女巫呢

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‎妳怎麼會來了？

171
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‎我們再聯絡

172
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‎邦妮，若妳想把第二個房間都租出去

173
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‎一定要告訴我
‎我的濕衣服都放在那裡啊

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‎她不是要搬進來

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‎她負責評估單位

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‎黛安，妳知道丹尼爾
‎考進了史丹佛大學吧？

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‎我知道，我的推薦信有幫助吧

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‎是的

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‎那所學校除了是世界上最頂尖的學府

180
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‎學費還貴得要命

181
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‎所以我和馬克只能變賣一些資產

182
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‎講英文啊，拜託

183
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‎天啊，我要把公寓賣掉

184
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‎所以我要換新房東了？

185
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‎黛安，妳要搬出去

186
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‎甚麼？妳怎麼可以這樣對我？

187
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‎我為這個地方付出了那麼多

188
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‎范海倫的貼紙

189
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‎冰箱上的冰箱哥海報

190
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‎（72號 冰箱哥）

191
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‎也許對妳來說是一件好事

192
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‎這可能正是妳需要的動力

193
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‎那是甚麼意思？

194
00:08:36,126 --> 00:08:40,001
‎妳不覺得是時候審視自己的人生嗎？

195
00:08:40,084 --> 00:08:41,751
‎等等，家裡的洗碗碟機呢？

196
00:08:41,834 --> 00:08:43,709
‎我把它升級為啤酒機了

197
00:08:44,918 --> 00:08:46,376
‎我現在沒空跟妳鬧

198
00:08:46,459 --> 00:08:49,334
‎有流浪漢走過我們的車
‎害馬克很焦慮

199
00:08:49,418 --> 00:08:50,876
‎流浪漢？

200
00:08:50,959 --> 00:08:52,751
‎妳把我趕出家門，害我也變流浪漢了

201
00:08:52,834 --> 00:08:53,959
‎妳有一個禮拜時間

202
00:08:54,584 --> 00:08:56,876
‎噢，時間真多

203
00:08:56,959 --> 00:08:59,751
‎我試過在一週內懷孕再打掉！

204
00:08:59,834 --> 00:09:02,459
‎我會活得好好的，老姊！

205
00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:04,334
‎（黛安大道，鄧布羅斯基街）

206
00:09:05,376 --> 00:09:07,668
‎被科特甩掉，飯碗快要不保

207
00:09:07,751 --> 00:09:10,251
‎也快要有家歸不得

208
00:09:10,334 --> 00:09:12,626
‎衰事接二連三

209
00:09:12,709 --> 00:09:16,334
‎幸好我永遠可以倚靠
‎我的寶貝兒子麥奇

210
00:09:16,418 --> 00:09:18,001
‎嗨，麥奇

211
00:09:18,084 --> 00:09:19,543
‎大部分母親看到兒子

212
00:09:19,626 --> 00:09:23,084
‎被22公斤的新秀麗行李箱擊中
‎都會嚇個半死

213
00:09:23,168 --> 00:09:25,501
‎但麥奇的頭顱比公羊還要硬

214
00:09:25,584 --> 00:09:30,793
‎他在每一場芝加哥體育比賽中
‎都會被打到頭

215
00:09:30,876 --> 00:09:34,084
‎他有著如此堅硬的頭顱
‎所以我只生了這個獨子

216
00:09:34,168 --> 00:09:35,709
‎生他的時候痛死我了

217
00:09:36,543 --> 00:09:39,293
‎嗨，寶貝兒子，我帶了肋尾排給你

218
00:09:39,376 --> 00:09:41,251
‎媽，我現在超忙

219
00:09:41,334 --> 00:09:43,876
‎西南航空一直在做促銷

220
00:09:43,959 --> 00:09:45,834
‎所有行李免運

221
00:09:45,918 --> 00:09:48,668
‎知道怎麼能幫到你嗎？
‎要是我搬去跟你一起住

222
00:09:48,751 --> 00:09:50,918
‎我可以煮希臘旋轉烤肉給你當早餐

223
00:09:51,001 --> 00:09:52,293
‎媽，對不起了

224
00:09:52,376 --> 00:09:54,918
‎老爸已經睡在車庫的隱壁床了

225
00:09:55,001 --> 00:09:56,876
‎那個奸狡的人渣

226
00:09:56,959 --> 00:10:00,668
‎他居然有臉叫自己兒子去保釋他

227
00:10:01,293 --> 00:10:02,918
‎後院的小木屋呢？

228
00:10:03,001 --> 00:10:05,543
‎我絕對不會讓母親大人睡小木屋

229
00:10:05,626 --> 00:10:08,959
‎況且我兄弟安東
‎在老婆出獄前都要住在那裡

230
00:10:09,043 --> 00:10:12,251
‎你知道嗎？你說得沒錯
‎我不該屈就於小木屋

231
00:10:12,751 --> 00:10:14,126
‎我要來一個小升級

232
00:10:14,751 --> 00:10:15,834
‎兒子，我愛你

233
00:10:15,918 --> 00:10:19,084
‎記得搬東西要用腰力喔

234
00:10:19,918 --> 00:10:23,334
‎媽的，那肯定超過23公斤

235
00:10:23,418 --> 00:10:25,626
‎（公寓獵人，為你找好租處）

236
00:10:26,501 --> 00:10:29,793
‎我想要有游泳池，離地最好

237
00:10:29,876 --> 00:10:31,334
‎還要能裝下三台車的車庫

238
00:10:31,418 --> 00:10:33,668
‎因為我的科邁羅車要橫著放

239
00:10:33,751 --> 00:10:35,668
‎好，要求真多

240
00:10:35,751 --> 00:10:37,876
‎噢，收到妳的信貸評分了

241
00:10:39,626 --> 00:10:42,043
‎-我應該幫不到妳
‎-為甚麼？有問題嗎？

242
00:10:43,209 --> 00:10:44,668
‎負70分

243
00:10:44,751 --> 00:10:45,584
‎上升了耶

244
00:10:45,668 --> 00:10:47,751
‎也許我們需要重新評估妳的需求

245
00:10:47,834 --> 00:10:49,709
‎沒事，我靈活自如

246
00:10:49,793 --> 00:10:51,876
‎若是地下游泳池，我也滿意啦

247
00:10:51,959 --> 00:10:54,501
‎我要去上班了，我相信你喔…

248
00:10:54,584 --> 00:10:55,668
‎-卡爾
‎-卡爾

249
00:10:56,418 --> 00:10:58,418
‎（博羅）

250
00:10:58,501 --> 00:11:00,293
‎帥哥，剪得真好看

251
00:11:00,376 --> 00:11:02,584
‎非常有丹尼斯法蘭茲的味道

252
00:11:02,668 --> 00:11:05,043
‎總共…36美元？

253
00:11:05,126 --> 00:11:06,793
‎天啊，搶錢啊！

254
00:11:06,876 --> 00:11:08,543
‎不過物超所值啦

255
00:11:08,626 --> 00:11:10,043
‎這裡可以蘋果支付嗎？

256
00:11:11,043 --> 00:11:13,876
‎可以啊，一桶蘋果應該就可以了

257
00:11:13,959 --> 00:11:16,334
‎說真的，拿我的電話去掃瞄吧

258
00:11:16,918 --> 00:11:20,543
‎可惡，讓我研究一下這個該死的平板

259
00:11:21,918 --> 00:11:23,251
‎按錯了，或許是這個…

260
00:11:23,334 --> 00:11:25,626
‎好，既然我們把會陰消毒好了

261
00:11:25,709 --> 00:11:27,626
‎我們來拔掉倒生的毛吧

262
00:11:27,709 --> 00:11:29,501
‎黛安，把電視關掉

263
00:11:29,584 --> 00:11:31,418
‎可惡，抱歉，稍等

264
00:11:32,168 --> 00:11:33,876
‎妳幹嘛會在公司看這個？

265
00:11:33,959 --> 00:11:35,876
‎你說不能看小熊隊比賽啊

266
00:11:35,959 --> 00:11:37,584
‎馬上關掉

267
00:11:37,668 --> 00:11:40,334
‎好了，原來要按“關閉”

268
00:11:40,418 --> 00:11:43,959
‎黛安，已經兩天沒有人找妳理髮

269
00:11:44,043 --> 00:11:47,209
‎所以我才派妳做前台
‎可是妳越幫越忙

270
00:11:47,793 --> 00:11:49,626
‎所以我繼續等人來理髮？

271
00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:53,251
‎黛安，老實說
‎我不知道要安排妳做甚麼了

272
00:11:53,334 --> 00:11:55,876
‎也許妳不適合在這裡工作吧

273
00:11:56,459 --> 00:11:58,834
‎噢，我知道怎麼回事了

274
00:11:58,918 --> 00:12:00,501
‎真可惜喔

275
00:12:00,584 --> 00:12:03,376
‎我很想在博羅工作喔

276
00:12:03,459 --> 00:12:05,751
‎因為這個地方屌爆了

277
00:12:06,418 --> 00:12:07,418
‎神經病

278
00:12:08,959 --> 00:12:10,418
‎（屌爆）

279
00:12:10,501 --> 00:12:13,168
‎當一個白人說自己來自芝加哥

280
00:12:13,251 --> 00:12:15,334
‎他其實很大機會是來自效區

281
00:12:15,418 --> 00:12:17,543
‎像我姊姊邦妮住的地方

282
00:12:23,418 --> 00:12:26,251
‎嗨，我在跟我史丹佛的室友聊電話
‎媽媽在廚房

283
00:12:26,334 --> 00:12:27,709
‎孩子，拿著，幫我滅掉吧

284
00:12:27,793 --> 00:12:30,209
‎噢，我不想要香菸

285
00:12:30,293 --> 00:12:33,584
‎嗨，這個地方真棒
‎窗簾那些都很不錯喔

286
00:12:33,668 --> 00:12:36,168
‎聽著，我要跟妳私底下談談

287
00:12:36,251 --> 00:12:38,709
‎無論是甚麼，在馬克面前也能照直說

288
00:12:38,793 --> 00:12:41,793
‎好，喂，我陰道一直發出噗噗聲

289
00:12:41,876 --> 00:12:43,876
‎我去幫吹葉機充電

290
00:12:43,959 --> 00:12:47,834
‎言歸正傳，公寓那邊
‎可以多給我幾天時間嗎？

291
00:12:47,918 --> 00:12:49,876
‎也許兩到三年

292
00:12:49,959 --> 00:12:51,876
‎我有很多事情要處理

293
00:12:51,959 --> 00:12:53,209
‎絕對不行

294
00:12:54,668 --> 00:12:56,168
‎我就知道會這樣

295
00:12:57,334 --> 00:13:00,709
‎這張是尤諾披薩店的白金會員卡

296
00:13:00,793 --> 00:13:05,084
‎持卡人可以一生免費吃深盤披薩

297
00:13:05,168 --> 00:13:08,209
‎我在《埃裏希晨間瘋人院》
‎一個比基尼比賽贏回來的

298
00:13:08,293 --> 00:13:11,668
‎顯然這張會員卡的價值
‎已經遠超過租金

299
00:13:11,751 --> 00:13:14,376
‎我們只好按比例計算差額

300
00:13:14,459 --> 00:13:16,418
‎哇，這個交易真划算

301
00:13:16,501 --> 00:13:18,168
‎我撤銷交易

302
00:13:18,251 --> 00:13:20,793
‎對了，一場來到，我要妳簽個東西

303
00:13:20,876 --> 00:13:23,918
‎簽妥就代表妳同意
‎在以上日期前撤離公寓

304
00:13:24,001 --> 00:13:25,668
‎叫律師來看看也行

305
00:13:25,751 --> 00:13:28,418
‎好啊，我就去問問我的律師

306
00:13:28,501 --> 00:13:30,959
‎還有我的證券經紀人和牙醫

307
00:13:31,043 --> 00:13:33,959
‎拜託，邦妮
‎妳明知我負擔不起那些奢侈的東西

308
00:13:34,043 --> 00:13:36,751
‎不是每個人都嫁給富二代的

309
00:13:36,834 --> 00:13:40,668
‎別再亂說有穩定工作的人是富二代了

310
00:13:40,751 --> 00:13:42,418
‎我不會簽妳這份爛文件

311
00:13:42,501 --> 00:13:46,126
‎我居然差點就把終生免費的
‎深盤披薩給妳了

312
00:13:46,209 --> 00:13:49,126
‎無限量配料共三款，沒有貴價肉

313
00:13:49,209 --> 00:13:52,043
‎週末晚上不能使用
‎有限制使用地點…

314
00:13:52,126 --> 00:13:53,209
‎黛安，回家吧

315
00:13:58,918 --> 00:14:00,084
‎孩子，你肚子餓嗎？

316
00:14:01,209 --> 00:14:03,168
‎我室友叫索爾

317
00:14:03,251 --> 00:14:05,626
‎他是拿水球獎學金進來的

318
00:14:05,709 --> 00:14:09,043
‎還說他女友會很常過來睡

319
00:14:09,126 --> 00:14:10,084
‎我不該抱怨的

320
00:14:10,168 --> 00:14:12,918
‎史丹佛大學是全世界最頂尖的學府

321
00:14:13,001 --> 00:14:15,001
‎你的口氣就像你媽一樣

322
00:14:15,084 --> 00:14:16,793
‎你實際是怎麼想的？

323
00:14:18,709 --> 00:14:21,084
‎好，我先說

324
00:14:21,168 --> 00:14:25,251
‎我知道你看著我的時候會想
‎“靠，我阿姨振作起來了”

325
00:14:25,334 --> 00:14:26,918
‎但老實說

326
00:14:27,001 --> 00:14:30,376
‎我今年迎來很多人生改變
‎不知道未來會怎麼樣

327
00:14:31,168 --> 00:14:32,043
‎換你說了

328
00:14:33,751 --> 00:14:37,709
‎我想因為大家都想我進史丹佛大學

329
00:14:37,793 --> 00:14:40,043
‎我從來沒有問過自己是否想去

330
00:14:40,126 --> 00:14:41,209
‎我之前也試過這樣

331
00:14:41,293 --> 00:14:44,293
‎我第三個單身派對
‎要去中世紀餐廳時就這樣覺得

332
00:14:44,376 --> 00:14:46,084
‎你知道那些東西都是假的嗎？

333
00:14:46,168 --> 00:14:48,251
‎知道，我們還一直告訴妳

334
00:14:48,876 --> 00:14:51,751
‎我為何要搬到三千公里外去尋找自我

335
00:14:51,834 --> 00:14:53,626
‎但我連在家都不知道自己是誰

336
00:14:54,959 --> 00:14:57,834
‎我知道你是誰，你是我出色的外甥

337
00:14:57,918 --> 00:15:02,126
‎你帥氣、善良
‎還很有才華，知道嗎？

338
00:15:02,209 --> 00:15:03,876
‎你具備的藝術天份

339
00:15:03,959 --> 00:15:07,001
‎你不管去哪裡也會大放異彩

340
00:15:07,793 --> 00:15:09,293
‎妳喜歡我的藝術作品？

341
00:15:09,376 --> 00:15:11,084
‎非常棒，丹尼爾

342
00:15:11,168 --> 00:15:13,584
‎你阿姨我明明不喜歡藝術的

343
00:15:14,168 --> 00:15:16,501
‎噢，我的房產經紀，我是黛安

344
00:15:16,584 --> 00:15:18,209
‎喂，黛安，有好消息

345
00:15:18,293 --> 00:15:20,293
‎找到一個符合妳價碼的地方

346
00:15:20,376 --> 00:15:22,043
‎我的天啊

347
00:15:22,126 --> 00:15:24,376
‎丹尼爾，看到了嗎？
‎事情是會迎刃而解的

348
00:15:24,459 --> 00:15:25,626
‎在哪一個社區？

349
00:15:25,709 --> 00:15:28,001
‎比爾森？後院？上城？下城？

350
00:15:28,084 --> 00:15:29,459
‎洛根廣場？林肯廣場？

351
00:15:29,543 --> 00:15:30,959
‎林肯公園？加菲爾公園？

352
00:15:31,043 --> 00:15:33,501
‎摩根公園？海德花園？公園不錯喔

353
00:15:33,584 --> 00:15:34,584
‎在哈蒙德

354
00:15:34,668 --> 00:15:36,709
‎哈蒙德？不過那是在…

355
00:15:37,418 --> 00:15:41,001
‎印第安納州

356
00:15:41,584 --> 00:15:48,001
‎不要…

357
00:15:52,251 --> 00:15:54,334
‎或者印第安納州沒有多糟糕

358
00:15:54,418 --> 00:15:55,709
‎你在開玩笑嗎？

359
00:15:55,793 --> 00:15:59,251
‎我到搬到那個爛地方成為一個邊緣人

360
00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:02,918
‎晚上獨自吃著微波菠菜蛋奶捲

361
00:16:03,001 --> 00:16:06,626
‎等到一天我養的家貓叛變
‎然後我就被殺了

362
00:16:06,709 --> 00:16:09,584
‎我們也不會再見面
‎因為我會被困在加州

363
00:16:09,668 --> 00:16:12,418
‎聽著索爾抱怨女友的床技

364
00:16:13,209 --> 00:16:14,209
‎你知道嗎？

365
00:16:14,293 --> 00:16:16,584
‎你要離開，我也要離開…

366
00:16:16,668 --> 00:16:19,334
‎算了，我們來一場
‎結束一切的狂歡派對吧

367
00:16:19,418 --> 00:16:22,959
‎最後一次露鮑魚的機會

368
00:16:23,043 --> 00:16:26,668
‎我不知道露鮑魚對這件事情有何幫助

369
00:16:26,751 --> 00:16:30,293
‎是沒幫助的
‎世界充滿我們控制不了的破事

370
00:16:30,376 --> 00:16:33,501
‎被老公甩掉，遇到爛老闆

371
00:16:33,584 --> 00:16:35,168
‎被淫賤老姊踢出家門…

372
00:16:35,251 --> 00:16:38,918
‎-請不要這樣說我媽
‎-丹尼爾，就如我經常說的一句

373
00:16:39,001 --> 00:16:40,626
‎當人生給你一顆檸檬

374
00:16:40,709 --> 00:16:44,501
‎你就用它來做檸檬酒

375
00:16:44,584 --> 00:16:46,084
‎（賓尼飲料庫）

376
00:17:03,293 --> 00:17:05,126
‎（來黛安的狂歡派對，保證屌爆）

377
00:17:13,043 --> 00:17:14,876
‎（結束一切的狂歡派對）

378
00:17:17,084 --> 00:17:17,918
‎（芝加哥嗨咖阿姨）

379
00:17:18,001 --> 00:17:19,751
‎（黛安結束一切的狂歡派對）

380
00:17:19,834 --> 00:17:21,043
‎（這張海報太酷了）

381
00:17:24,418 --> 00:17:26,001
‎親愛的，謝謝來臨

382
00:17:26,084 --> 00:17:27,876
‎噢，讓我來一口

383
00:17:27,959 --> 00:17:29,126
‎綠灣隊去死！

384
00:17:29,626 --> 00:17:30,626
‎乾杯

385
00:17:32,501 --> 00:17:33,876
‎姊妹們！

386
00:17:33,959 --> 00:17:37,501
‎祝福妳們，我好想念妳們啊

387
00:17:37,584 --> 00:17:39,668
‎沒有妳，店裡不再一樣

388
00:17:39,751 --> 00:17:43,709
‎店裡吵雜聲更少
‎煙味更少、樂趣更少

389
00:17:44,584 --> 00:17:45,501
‎真的

390
00:17:47,459 --> 00:17:49,543
‎史葛特柏賓，你來了

391
00:17:49,626 --> 00:17:51,959
‎妳明明說其他公牛隊成員也會來

392
00:17:52,043 --> 00:17:53,751
‎是的，沒錯

393
00:17:53,834 --> 00:17:56,293
‎待會再聊，老娘單身喔

394
00:17:56,376 --> 00:17:58,876
‎我們可以玩“柏賓龜頭只進一點”

395
00:18:00,168 --> 00:18:01,001
‎我知道

396
00:18:01,084 --> 00:18:03,709
‎找到你了，我的帥氣外甥

397
00:18:03,793 --> 00:18:07,376
‎我真想再次回到18歲，並住在城裡

398
00:18:07,459 --> 00:18:09,126
‎其實啊，我要去上大學…

399
00:18:09,209 --> 00:18:11,959
‎喂…冥河合唱團，先等等

400
00:18:12,043 --> 00:18:14,084
‎大家可以看過來這邊嗎？

401
00:18:14,168 --> 00:18:17,251
‎今天我們要慶祝一個時代的終結

402
00:18:17,334 --> 00:18:19,126
‎有些人可能已經知道

403
00:18:19,209 --> 00:18:21,959
‎這次狂歡派對
‎將會是這間屋最後一次的派對

404
00:18:22,043 --> 00:18:23,668
‎-甚麼？
‎-不是吧

405
00:18:23,751 --> 00:18:25,251
‎其他公牛隊成員呢？

406
00:18:25,334 --> 00:18:26,543
‎但更重要的是

407
00:18:26,626 --> 00:18:30,293
‎我們還要慶祝一個全新的時代

408
00:18:30,376 --> 00:18:32,334
‎我想敬我外甥一杯

409
00:18:32,418 --> 00:18:36,084
‎丹尼爾惠靈頓趕緊上來吧

410
00:18:37,334 --> 00:18:39,709
‎今晚是我最爽的一晚！

411
00:18:39,793 --> 00:18:42,001
‎他這麼乖巧真是個奇蹟

412
00:18:42,084 --> 00:18:45,168
‎因為他爸是個懦夫，他媽是個爛人

413
00:18:46,168 --> 00:18:49,084
‎搞甚麼？

414
00:18:49,168 --> 00:18:50,501
‎-媽？
‎-邦妮？

415
00:18:50,584 --> 00:18:52,751
‎把那個該死的啤酒杯放下

416
00:18:53,918 --> 00:18:56,126
‎慘了，她的芝加哥口音爆出來了

417
00:18:56,209 --> 00:18:58,251
‎-你跟她提過要開趴嗎？
‎-沒有

418
00:18:58,334 --> 00:19:00,501
‎我追蹤他的手機，查到他人在這裡

419
00:19:00,584 --> 00:19:03,168
‎那是侵犯我的隱私

420
00:19:03,251 --> 00:19:04,793
‎你，給我收拾好東西

421
00:19:04,876 --> 00:19:06,959
‎妳，跟我出去消防梯談

422
00:19:10,293 --> 00:19:11,668
‎沒事沒事

423
00:19:11,751 --> 00:19:13,126
‎派對繼續

424
00:19:13,209 --> 00:19:16,084
‎冥河合唱團，來一首《揚帆出海》

425
00:19:21,001 --> 00:19:21,959
‎邦妮，聽我解釋…

426
00:19:22,043 --> 00:19:25,584
‎妳讓我未成年的兒子喝酒
‎我真是該去報警

427
00:19:25,668 --> 00:19:28,209
‎叫警察？
‎妳以為那些笑氣是誰帶來的？

428
00:19:28,293 --> 00:19:29,126
‎看看妳

429
00:19:29,209 --> 00:19:32,876
‎妳在搞一場20年前就該結束的派對

430
00:19:32,959 --> 00:19:35,084
‎妳以為爸媽為何要搬到亞利桑那州？

431
00:19:35,168 --> 00:19:37,501
‎因為老爸有痛風，乾燥的環境比較好

432
00:19:37,584 --> 00:19:40,459
‎不，那是因為要遠離妳

433
00:19:41,793 --> 00:19:43,459
‎妳就像芝加哥一樣

434
00:19:43,543 --> 00:19:46,418
‎一團糟，美好舊日，現已過去

435
00:19:47,001 --> 00:19:48,959
‎我的確像芝加哥一樣

436
00:19:49,043 --> 00:19:50,459
‎我們雖然不是完美

437
00:19:50,543 --> 00:19:52,834
‎南區簡直是一團糟

438
00:19:52,918 --> 00:19:54,501
‎北區還比較好

439
00:19:54,584 --> 00:19:57,834
‎必須投放大量時間和金錢
‎說來蠻合理的

440
00:19:57,918 --> 00:20:00,334
‎至少我不會擔心別人怎麼想

441
00:20:00,418 --> 00:20:02,126
‎然後戴著面具做人

442
00:20:02,209 --> 00:20:04,751
‎而妳就是這樣對丹尼爾

443
00:20:04,834 --> 00:20:06,668
‎我告訴妳，他要上大學

444
00:20:06,751 --> 00:20:09,668
‎妳要擔心就擔心妳自己吧

445
00:20:09,751 --> 00:20:11,834
‎不要這樣跟她說話

446
00:20:11,918 --> 00:20:15,084
‎丹尼爾，你喝醉了，下樓上車等我

447
00:20:15,168 --> 00:20:17,293
‎妳已經管不著我了

448
00:20:17,376 --> 00:20:18,668
‎他媽給我上車

449
00:20:19,251 --> 00:20:20,084
‎好

450
00:20:20,543 --> 00:20:22,209
‎妳明天早上9點就得離開

451
00:20:23,209 --> 00:20:25,584
‎離開前給我打掃乾淨

452
00:20:38,251 --> 00:20:40,043
‎丹尼爾，你還好嗎？

453
00:20:40,126 --> 00:20:41,084
‎不好

454
00:20:41,168 --> 00:20:43,834
‎黛安阿姨每天早上都會這樣宿醉嗎？

455
00:20:43,918 --> 00:20:46,168
‎對，沒錯，有夠可悲的

456
00:20:48,793 --> 00:20:50,876
‎一切都是因為她

457
00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:54,126
‎確實是因為她

458
00:20:55,959 --> 00:20:58,293
‎媽，我們要談談

459
00:20:59,834 --> 00:21:00,834
‎等我十分鐘

460
00:21:06,543 --> 00:21:07,376
‎嘿

461
00:21:08,043 --> 00:21:08,876
‎嘿

462
00:21:09,376 --> 00:21:10,959
‎我把洗碗碟機裝回去了

463
00:21:11,626 --> 00:21:12,543
‎我看到

464
00:21:12,626 --> 00:21:15,543
‎雖然上下顛倒了，但妳還是有用心

465
00:21:16,376 --> 00:21:18,501
‎我把文件簽妥了

466
00:21:18,584 --> 00:21:20,876
‎噢，妳沒有簽成大奶麥基

467
00:21:20,959 --> 00:21:23,043
‎沒有啦，我簽本名了

468
00:21:23,126 --> 00:21:26,001
‎阿邦，妳說得沒錯
‎我要審視自己的人生

469
00:21:27,043 --> 00:21:29,501
‎言歸正傳，印第安納洲離這裡不遠…

470
00:21:29,584 --> 00:21:30,751
‎黛安，先別說話

471
00:21:30,834 --> 00:21:33,668
‎我不知道昨晚到底發生過甚麼事情

472
00:21:33,751 --> 00:21:37,334
‎但丹尼爾已經決定了
‎目前不想入讀史丹佛大學

473
00:21:37,418 --> 00:21:39,834
‎哇靠，妳肯定很生氣了

474
00:21:39,918 --> 00:21:40,751
‎是的

475
00:21:40,834 --> 00:21:43,084
‎本來是的，但我想了一下

476
00:21:43,168 --> 00:21:45,626
‎我從沒見過他這麼開心、充滿自信

477
00:21:45,709 --> 00:21:46,584
‎還有宿醉

478
00:21:46,668 --> 00:21:50,084
‎但正如布芮尼布朗所說
‎孩子開心，就應該支持

479
00:21:50,168 --> 00:21:52,418
‎挺起胸膛露出來，妳又能怎麼做？

480
00:21:52,501 --> 00:21:55,293
‎我告訴妳要怎麼做
‎讓他跟妳住在這裡

481
00:21:55,376 --> 00:21:57,376
‎讓他用一年時間想清楚去向

482
00:21:57,459 --> 00:21:58,418
‎不管他指甚麼去向

483
00:21:58,501 --> 00:22:00,459
‎天啊，那是不是代表…

484
00:22:00,543 --> 00:22:02,584
‎我們目前不會把這裡賣掉

485
00:22:03,459 --> 00:22:05,043
‎怎麼樣？

486
00:22:05,126 --> 00:22:07,126
‎-怎麼樣？
‎-怎麼樣？

487
00:22:07,209 --> 00:22:08,584
‎怎麼樣？

488
00:22:08,668 --> 00:22:10,043
‎-怎麼樣？
‎-怎麼樣？

489
00:22:10,126 --> 00:22:13,668
‎別叫了，丹尼爾
‎你根本不知道這句是甚麼來頭

490
00:22:13,751 --> 00:22:16,668
‎我們好好慶祝吧，第一輪我請客！

491
00:22:16,751 --> 00:22:19,043
‎噢，靠，我無業耶

492
00:22:19,126 --> 00:22:21,626
‎事實上，我有一個主意

493
00:22:24,668 --> 00:22:25,501
‎她回來了

494
00:22:25,584 --> 00:22:28,501
‎妳回來拿遺漏在店的啤酒漏斗嗎？

495
00:22:28,584 --> 00:22:32,043
‎不，我是來幫人理髮的

496
00:22:33,626 --> 00:22:36,668
‎派對邀請原來很適合整合成客戶名單

497
00:22:36,751 --> 00:22:38,626
‎吉迪恩，怎麼樣？

498
00:22:39,793 --> 00:22:40,668
‎三號椅

499
00:22:43,376 --> 00:22:44,626
‎噢，不好意思！

500
00:23:35,626 --> 00:23:38,543
‎字幕翻譯：李瑋樂