Idalia?
Hey.
Julia's in the drunk tank. I passed out.
Can you watch Andrea?
Conjugal visit?
Oh, no! Shit!
Mom, why did you buy a cellphone if you never pick up?
Call me back.
-Andrea, why are you standing there? -Where's Granny?
Andrea, you're not dressed yet? Come on!
-What's a drunk tank? -What?
A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES
Lend me 3,000. I'm in such deep shit with Julia.
-You owe me 8,000. -Yes.
-You can have Andrea as collateral. -I'm babysitting her again?
I fed her, she's peed. She won't be any trouble.
Put her to work or something.
Pérez…
-Pérez Laborde, Julia. -Pérez…
Here she is.
She made bail already.
What? I'm her husband, I'm bailing her out. It can't be.
Someone else paid.
Who?
Oh, please.
She couldn't have left.
Have you tried calling her?
Can you believe this guy? His own wife!
Julia what?
Pérez.
Pérez from the drunk tank.
Ready.
Five, five, eight, five, four, nine,
five, one.
-Five what? -One.
I'll pay you back.
Do you have a show tonight?
No.
We practice in the mornings and work in the evenings.
We do wrestling shows three times a week.
Poison here has her own private gig.
Yeah, later today at Tlalne.
That asshole!
Your man?
No.
You should leave him.
Enjoy your freedom, Julia.
-Your bag. -Yes.
-Hold your arms out. -Yes, of course.
Yes.
Next.
Go ahead, open your bag.
Hold your arms out.
Turn around.
Go ahead.
So?
-I'll call you or you'll call me? -I will.
I'll come see you.
Thanks for everything.
Close it, princess. You sit here.
Party got wild, huh, miss?
Hold on, Augusto! Hold on!
Hey, come.
I can't hold it anymore!
Take your pills and we'll see, okay?
Julia?
-Julia? -Give me a sec.
What the hell, dude? I went to get you.
I can't hear you, I'm in the shower.
Julia?
Look, it was the worse timing, okay?
But we'll make it.
Ju?
I'm sorry, dude.
Forgive me, Julia. I was… Fuck, things got crazy.
Fucking booze, man.
There's also another kind of clucking,
which they use to talk to their chicks.
Great, sweetie.
Hey, cut those tomatoes for your mom. Go on.
I'm finished.
Good, they're perfect, ready.
This is their warning for a bird of prey!
Did you know there are 33 types of chicken calls?
Thirty-three?
Yes! I'm doing the one they use for their baby chickens.
Andrea, take my cellphone.
Watch some videos.
Watch that YouTuber you like.
I don't like him.
I like that he's a millionaire.
Fine, then.
Not too loud, okay?
Don't be selfish, lend your toys to other kids.
Or be smart and rent them out!
I've earned twice what my Shopkin cost.
Girls, I'll show you ten ways to do business with…
Turn it down!
Think of all those toys you don't use that much.
I'd rent them if I were you. Make money…
I kind of have a soft spot for that tiny room.
I waited and waited, but the jerk never came out.
How come?
I think he went homo in there.
Nonsense, no way.
Lately, when I come visit, all he wants to do is talk.
He's probably bummed he wasn't chosen to come out with the first group.
-So, when is he getting out? -We'll have to wait one more year.
What about yours?
The new president says he'll be out in a few months.
We'll have to wait and see.
I'm glad.
You know what?
I like things this way, only seeing him every two weeks.
I'm used to it now. Sometimes I think it's better this way.
How come we got dessert?
No reason.
"I wanna…
tawlk…
about what happoned…
last night."
"I wanna talk about what happened last night." Did it!
Hey, give me that!
Mom, do you know what happened last night?
No, honey.
I don't know.
What happened?
What happened last night?
No…
Nothing important.
All right, are you done?
It was Rebeca, dude.
Yes, I know who she is.
I don't want to talk about her.
I know what happened last night.
Let me--
Is everything okay?
Yeah, I'm fine.
Did I tell you about Caro's grandma?
You know--?
Andrea, rinse off your hair.
I'm serious.
Yes, Dad.
What's up, Rebe?
Your message sounded a little too serious.
Let's go grab a beer or something.
Where's Julia? You couldn't bail her out?
They gave her a month.
No. It's "Saturday at Mom's."
You have a little spark in your eye.
Piss off.
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.
Will you help me with my homework?
We don't have time to help you like good parents.
We're watching our favorite show,
Bad Parents Hunter.
These are really bad parents!
Ooh, I know!
Look what they did to that kid who looks like Timmy…
-Not it! -Not it!
…in that filthy home they live in.
You're it, Ruy.
It was open.
Dad, you're it.
What is he doing here? I thought he hunted bad parents.
Someone's at the door. You're it.
Crap!
My goodness! We're bad parents!
That's right, you scoundrel!
See you on the next episode of Bad Parents Hunter!
Thanks.
Coming.
Don't miss it!
Who is it?
Delivery!
I didn't order anything.
It says so right here.
"Order placed by Julia."
What?
The delivery address just changed. Sorry!
Sorry, man!
Conniving bitch. Damn!
Idalia, I'll be back in 20 minutes. Watch Andrea for me.
-Good evening. How are you? -Hello.
-Good. It's getting chilly. -Your order.
Check your order, please.
-Okay. Thanks. Good night. -You're welcome.
Have a good one.
Hey!
Was that Julia's order?
-I don't know. -I just saw you.
Julia Pérez, dammit!
Delivery for you, miss.
Silly.
-Let's see. -Really?
Come here.
What?
So, "Saturday at Mom's," you fucking bitch?
Oh, Fausto!
Open the fucking door. Son of a bitch.
Just wait till you open the door, fucker.
That fucking bitch!
Fucking shit.
I remember…
Fucking whore!
Hey, asshole!
What are you doing? That's my car!
-What? -You'll pay for this!
Bring it on!
Are you there yet?
You'll like this.
-All right, motherfucker. -Wait, dude!
I didn't even scratch it!
Ruy?
One, two, three.
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, dear Andrea
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, dear Andrea
Happy birthday
To you
-Good morning. -Good morning, sweetie.
Good morning. Congratulations!
-Lift it all the way. -You too.
You'll get hit a lot today, but somebody's got to be the piñata.
No!
We're taking a shower. That's your present.
-Want to get your face painted? -Yes!
That's the spirit, come here!
Xico, cool colors!
Baby, you look beautiful!
I know.
-Kids! How are you? -You left the door unlocked.
-Put me down, Julia! -Okay.
-It's so dangerous. -Hi, Majo.
What?
Is my car safe outside?
Dude, of course it's safe. I always park outside.
-Well, it's different. -Is Dad coming?
-No, he's in Houston. -Okay, cool.
He sends his best. He'll bring her something.
What is it?
You're nuts, son.
How many kids did you push to get your face painted first?
Well, it's my party too.
Dude, Majo is here with her little monsters.
Right. I'm changing the music, Mom.
We have these three dolls.
No one has ever touched them or brushed their hair.
These dolls are special
because they can grant any wish you have.
We also have a bear.
This bear can talk, and he's very smart.
Speak, bear.
We'll start with the dolls.
On the count of one, two, three.
-Ten! -Eleven!
-Eleven pesos, anyone else? -Eleven and a half.
Eleven and a half, going once…
Where are the candles?
They didn't come with the cake.
You were supposed to get them. I got the cake.
The bakery sells them. It's obvious.
You really didn't get them?
Of course I didn't. It was your job to do it.
Relax, Apocalypto.
I'll just order some.
Get them delivered.
Sure, go fucking ahead.
Are you drunk?
On my daughter's birthday?
Where's the cake? I have to go.
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, Andrea
Happy birthday to you
Kiddo, you can't lock the door.
Open up, sweetie.
Everyone's gone.
Only Grandma is here.
Your cousin didn't consider your feelings when she blew out the candles.
You know Mommy's family is full of scumbags.
And that we must learn to forgive them,
because even if they behave like total jerks,
they're still family.
Are you mad at me?
-Not at all, sweetie. -Of course not, baby.
Do you want to be alone?
Yes… for a bit.
All right.
We respect your space,
but you have to unlock the door.
Can I use the iPad?
Yes.
And maybe a piece of cake?
Sure.
There, unlocked.
It was a lovely party.
Don't worry, it's just kids being kids.
Yes, I know.
And thanks for coming.
Well, she's my grandkid!
Hey, how's your mom?
-Hanging in there. -Have you seen her lately?
Yes, I did, yesterday.
-That's nice of you. -Yes.
Don't park. She's leaving.
-Mom, it's here. -Thanks again, see you soon.
Sure, take care.
Hurry up.
Wash that off your face.
-Are you okay? -Of course.
-Are you sure? -Yes.
-You're a fucking hypocrite. -What's your problem?
You and your damn dentist, just like your dad.
-I'm not like my dad. -Don't lie, you're screwing him.
A dentist? That's disgusting!
I am screwing him, and you know what? You and I are not together.
It's like fucking a pedophile.
You're the hypocrite! How many times have you cheated on me?
-Fuck! -Get off your high horse!
None of them meant anything.
-This is Andrea's dentist! -Keep it down!
I don't owe you an explanation.
-I've been holding this in-- -You can't get hard.
-I can't because you turn me off. -You're a shitty lay.
And you're a whore.
Wow!
A whore.
Who are you, dude?
Look who sounds just like my dad.
Why the fuck are you still in my house?
You said you'd get a place months ago.
I'll stay here, you can go to your fucking apartment.
Or rather your fucking love nest!
I can do whatever the fuck I want with the apartment my dad gave me.
I want you out of here tomorrow.
Hello?
What's up, Xico? How are you?
I'm heading to my mom's, but I have good news…
We got the job.
I'll call you tomorrow.
Fuck!
Mom, what are you doing here? Are you okay?
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