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‪NETFLIX 原創影集

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‪生活緊張刺激，姊姊麻煩無邊
‪杜奇狗狗生活富足

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‪三重分身、變成暴龍
‪登上王位、超級強尼

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‪你永不知道未來發展
‪因為這就是阿尼正傳

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{\an8}‪劇名：強尼的5秒鐘

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{\an8}‪這才叫生活

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{\an8}‪借用你爸爸的簡易製奶昔機
‪真是高明的舉動

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{\an8}‪也多虧我姊姊多重射線器源源不絕的

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{\an8}‪霜凍優格這個選項

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{\an8}‪我們可以隨時享用奶昔

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{\an8}‪再給我一杯，狗狗！

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‪好，真奇怪

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‪過去的我，我是一週後的你

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‪我只有五秒鐘告訴你
‪如果你想要拯救未來的豬肚市…

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‪我想！我想要拯救未來的豬肚市！

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‪但拯救豬肚市免遭什麼破壞？
‪未來的我沒說

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‪對！這些奶昔就是拯救豬肚市的關鍵

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‪腦子都凍住了

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‪繼續製作因為…

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‪等等，未來的我們
‪只是來偷現在我們的奶昔？

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‪這怎麼比拯救豬肚市重要？

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‪拯救豬肚市需要更多奶昔！

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‪你說得很有意思

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‪真棒，請繼續製作
‪不然豬肚市就完蛋了！

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‪而且要快一點！否則我們都會…

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‪你聽到我說了，我們太慢了！

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‪好，但快一點代表要更科學！

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‪將爆擊、縮小、增長和霜凍優格射線

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‪結合成多重射線器，簡直是天才

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‪而我們這次全新升級簡直是超級天才

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‪但我們該發明什麼新射線呢？

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‪我們來把多重射線器解鎖
‪測試一些選項

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‪強尼！

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‪對，我借了妳們的射線裝置
‪但現在已不重要了

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‪那到底什麼才重要？

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‪未來的我要現在的我
‪去拯救未來的豬肚市

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‪方法是馬上為未來我
‪製作現在的奶昔！

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‪你怎麼會知道？

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‪未來的我們利用茶室時光機

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‪警告現在的我們一定要這麼做
‪不然豬肚市就完蛋了！

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‪怎麼完蛋？

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‪不知道

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‪他們只能回來五秒鐘
‪拿一杯奶昔然後就消失了

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‪你確定未來的你並非只是騙現在的你

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‪讓你為他做奶昔嗎？

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‪好，聽起來確實像是我捉弄我的把戲

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‪典型未來的你

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‪-還有你
‪-等等

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‪給我們一個確切的數字
‪未來的你多久回來這裡一次？

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‪過度使用時光機或穿越時空
‪會導致時空出現裂痕

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‪可怕的生物就會逃出來

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‪牠們的確能摧毀未來的豬肚市

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‪過去五分鐘回來三次算很多嗎？

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‪很多！

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‪我們得趕快到未來阻止你
‪以免一發不可收拾

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‪情況不妙

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‪是什麼令實驗室出現時空裂痕呢？

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‪或許是因為我們弟弟很瞎的冒險

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‪一點也不瞎，是為了奶昔

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‪很瞎

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‪好，太奇怪了

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‪我們是一週前的妳們
‪想要阻止現在的強尼…

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‪等等，那是升級版的多重射線器嗎？

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‪對，我們花了一點時間

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‪但我們加入了超強射線
‪密度射線和飛行射線

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‪但我們保留了
‪源源不絕的霜凍優格這個選項

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‪妳們真是天才

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‪我真不敢相信過去的你這麼容易被騙

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‪我年紀較小時很笨，而且…

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‪就是他！我

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‪騙我未來的豬肚市會完蛋
‪然後偷走我的奶昔！

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‪起因是你偷走爸爸的奶昔製造器
‪和我們的多重射線器所致

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‪不關我事，重點是我…是他

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‪對，你必須馬上停止穿越時空

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‪你穿越時空？

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‪只因為他把簡易奶昔製造器弄壞了

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‪是嗎？

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‪然後你爸不准你看電視
‪打電動，去實驗室和見我一星期

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‪好，這樣事情清楚多了

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‪既然強尼喜歡奶昔
‪和討厭惹麻煩…再見！

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‪哎呀

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‪一週前的強尼

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‪你得阻止那個你
‪我們會設法延緩時間撕裂

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‪趕快！

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‪把整個東西拿走，離開這裡以免…

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‪以免什麼？

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‪以免以前笨笨的我來到

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‪你才是笨笨的我，胡亂穿越時空

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‪危害未來的豬肚市

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‪你們的工作不是阻止我們做蠢事嗎？

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‪對，但我們都知道你不會聽

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‪而且這些奶昔太好喝了！

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‪他說得沒錯

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‪我去享受源源不絕的奶昔了

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‪而你這個我永遠找不到我這個你

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‪其實過去的你說得有道理

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‪也許我們該停止時空穿梭

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‪我們可以這麼做

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‪或是我們可以做更多奶昔，狗狗！

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‪對，現在的你說得更有道理

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‪腦子都凍住了！

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‪你怎麼找到我們？

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‪我是你，記得嗎？所以我想到
‪一個我沒想過找到我的地方

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‪然後比你早五秒來到

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‪現在該帶我們和美味的奶昔回家了

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‪抓到他了！我是說抓到我

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‪我是說…真是苦樂參半

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‪但這是好消息，對吧？

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‪壞消息！

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‪上次穿越時空把時間撕裂完全打開了

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‪退後，我要發射縮小射線

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‪等等，未來的我們把它改成…

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‪…超強射線

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‪我未來的姊姊或許該警告我…

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‪情況變得更糟了

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{\an8}‪漢克主播曼在現場報導突發消息

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{\an8}‪最新消息是採訪車被毀掉了！

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{\an8}‪我身在市政廳

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{\an8}‪這裡有一隻怪物到處破壞

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{\an8}‪看來豬肚市要完蛋了

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‪嗯，你們不能指責我說謊
‪因為豬肚市真的完蛋了

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‪集中精神，我們得把那東西帶回來

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‪丟進時間裂縫裡，然後永遠關上裂縫

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‪我們去追捕怪物

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‪我們會想辦法修補時間裂縫

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‪而兩隻杜奇…

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‪我們負責保護這些美味又脆弱的奶昔

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‪交給我吧

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‪我們沒問題

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‪馬上…

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‪出發！

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‪如果這東西不是要破壞豬肚市

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‪其實牠還挺厲害

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‪就是嘛，看來我們比想像中更相似

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‪對，因為我是你

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‪我們來把這東西送回實驗室吧

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‪喂！

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‪醜八怪！看看你怎麼對付我們的…

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{\an8}‪密度射線

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{\an8}‪會令東西變得非常沉重

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‪實在太簡單了

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‪並不簡單

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‪該出動飛行射線了

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‪將牠變成小小的蒼蠅
‪我們就可把牠抓回實驗室

145
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‪啊，沒想到會這樣

146
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‪但我們早該想到

147
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‪這玩意還有一個選項我們沒試過

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‪我相信我們該…

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‪逃命了！

150
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‪差不多把茶室和裂痕抑制器連起來了

151
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‪然後以反向操作它們

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‪它會持續把時空撕裂縮小
‪直到它不再存在

153
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‪而且建造的過程輕而易舉

154
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‪好像我們每人都有兩雙手

155
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‪確實是

156
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‪救命！

157
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‪我們引誘他追我們這部分很成功

158
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‪但我們逃跑的部分就不太成功

159
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‪我就知道計畫中我們負責的部分
‪輕鬆得令人難以置信

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‪對

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‪很高興認識我

162
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‪我也很抱歉叫你年輕又愚蠢的我

163
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‪我們抓住你們了，兩位強尼

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‪謝謝，兩隻狗狗

165
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‪那東西什麼時候學會飛行？

166
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‪準備！

167
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‪牠在我們後面，非常生氣

168
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‪但牠沒掉進抑制器裡

169
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‪哇，沒想到這個爛攤子
‪都是奶昔造成的吧？

170
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‪你還喝得太快，腦子都凍住了

171
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‪你在想我在想的事情嗎？

172
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‪一直都是

173
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‪最後一杯奶昔來了！

174
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‪該來一次加強
‪又超冷凍的奶昔腦急凍了！

175
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‪腦子都凍住了！

176
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‪攻擊，狗狗！

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‪好了！

178
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‪現在關閉它吧，姊姊！

179
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‪看來時間能量脈衝把我們送回現在了

180
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‪而且沒有出現時間撕裂或異次元怪物

181
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‪但我們還有這些奶昔

182
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‪我知道最完美的慶祝方法了

183
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‪未來的我，我是一週前的你

184
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‪未來有什麼突擊測驗嗎？還有…

185
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‪哎呀

186
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‪奶昔製造器就是這樣爛掉
‪所以你爸才罰你不准出門

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‪各位，一週後見

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‪（紀念施萊辛格）

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{\an8}‪字幕翻譯：李恒聰