1
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[alarm blaring]
2
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♪ He's action-packed and sister-charged
And Dukey-dogged for living large ♪
3
00:00:12,722 --> 00:00:15,767
♪ In triple-cloning T-Rexing
Royal throning Johnny X-ing ♪
4
00:00:15,850 --> 00:00:20,021
♪ You never know what's coming next
Cos it's J-J-J-J-Johnny Test! ♪
5
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{\an8}[slurps]
6
00:00:29,739 --> 00:00:31,574
{\an8}-[dramatic music plays]
-This is it!
7
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{\an8}Today is the day I finally die…
of boredom!
8
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{\an8}[linoleum squeaks]
9
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{\an8}I'm going to the carwash,
and I'll give you two dollars in quarters
10
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{\an8}for the toy dispensers.
11
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{\an8}If I had… [coughs]
12
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{\an8}…three dollars in quarters,
13
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{\an8}it might be enough to save me.
14
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{\an8}Well, it was your best
bored-to-death performance to date,
15
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{\an8}so one more dollar, but that's it.
16
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Yes! Oh, and can Dukey come?
17
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[pants]
18
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[bell dings]
19
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[doorbell jingles]
20
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Hello, Squishy Wooshies!
21
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I didn't get it.
22
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I didn't get it.
23
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Nooo!
24
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[mournful violin playing]
25
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Aw, that's sad.
26
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But their disappointment is my gain,
27
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because today is the day I finally get…
28
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the rare Gnarly Narwhal,
29
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and complete
my Squishy Wooshie collection!
30
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Not a Narwhal.
31
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[coins rattle]
32
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Not a Narwhal.
33
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[coins rattle]
34
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Nooo!
35
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[doorbell jingles]
36
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Quick, tear me.
37
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[mournful violin playing]
38
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N-No.
39
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:09,422
But I just need one more dollar
to get the Narwhal!
40
00:02:09,505 --> 00:02:11,257
It's next, I know it.
41
00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:14,969
Johnny, I have had it with your
waste-of-money collecting obsession.
42
00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:17,013
You had to get all the Roboticles,
43
00:02:17,096 --> 00:02:19,140
every Tinymon trading card on the planet,
44
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and I am done giving you quarters
to collect a foamy horned whale
45
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that probably doesn't exist!
46
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Wrong! Cos there's a bunch
of Gnarly Narwhals on ePal
47
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for only $50.
48
00:02:29,942 --> 00:02:32,486
Johnny! I will never pay $50
49
00:02:32,570 --> 00:02:35,114
for something that only cost
five cents to make!
50
00:02:35,198 --> 00:02:36,616
[slams]
51
00:02:36,699 --> 00:02:37,867
What did you find in the car seats?
52
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One tissue packet, two pens,
three lip balms and…
53
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four quarters!
54
00:02:44,040 --> 00:02:48,794
Yes! Now we just have to figure out
how to get Dad back to the carwash.
55
00:02:49,587 --> 00:02:53,466
[Susan] We call it
the MRI-gnifying glass.
56
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It gives you the ability and portability
to see inside of things.
57
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Uh-huh.
58
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[Susan] Like four-inch-thick steel safes!
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[fanfare]
60
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[both] We're such geniuses.
61
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That's great, but I just need to borrow
some safety cones.
62
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Why?
63
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More dirt.
64
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And you think this will work?
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-Yes, and--
-[horn blares]
66
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Tree it now!
67
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Three… two…
68
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-a-one…
-[door opens]
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[wails] My clean car!
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[bell dings]
71
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[doorbell jingles]
72
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It's another zebra!
73
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The Narwhal's not in there, man!
74
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It's like a cruel game!
75
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:54,986
Oh, it's there. Just watch the master.
76
00:04:03,828 --> 00:04:05,246
This can't be happening.
77
00:04:05,329 --> 00:04:08,624
Maybe your dad's right
and there is no Gnarly Narwhal.
78
00:04:09,500 --> 00:04:11,836
There's only one way to find out!
79
00:04:12,670 --> 00:04:15,965
Johnny need MRI-gnify-thing to see if
there's a Gnarly Narwhal at the carwash,
80
00:04:16,048 --> 00:04:18,467
and before you say no…
please, oh, please!
81
00:04:18,551 --> 00:04:21,304
Please, I need to know,
and… you love me.
82
00:04:23,264 --> 00:04:24,640
Take it.
83
00:04:24,724 --> 00:04:28,853
But you guys are going way too far
for a cheap foam toy.
84
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Oh, we know.
85
00:04:30,021 --> 00:04:32,023
And how are you gonna get
back to the carwash?
86
00:04:32,857 --> 00:04:34,817
Oh, yeah. Do you have any birdseed?
87
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[birds squawk and tweet]
88
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-Now?
-Give them another moment to digest.
89
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[tweeting]
90
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-Now!
-[barks]
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[splat]
92
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[door opens]
93
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[screams] My clean car! Again!
94
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[bell dings]
95
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-[doorbell jingles]
-[kids sob]
96
00:05:01,177 --> 00:05:05,765
It's not a toy dispenser,
it's a sadness machine!
97
00:05:05,848 --> 00:05:08,642
Well, we're about to find out.
98
00:05:08,726 --> 00:05:09,769
[beeps]
99
00:05:09,852 --> 00:05:12,563
[whirring]
100
00:05:13,522 --> 00:05:16,942
Wait, there's not a single Gnarly Narwhal
in the whole thing!
101
00:05:18,152 --> 00:05:19,320
Sorry, kids.
102
00:05:19,403 --> 00:05:22,490
I know Gnarly Narwhal
is the rarest of all Squishy Wooshies,
103
00:05:22,573 --> 00:05:23,908
but they do exist.
104
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I saw one on ePal for $50.
105
00:05:26,535 --> 00:05:27,912
[doorbell jingles]
106
00:05:27,995 --> 00:05:31,665
Yeah, well, he knows
that ePal is not an option.
107
00:05:34,877 --> 00:05:36,879
Johnny, give up!
108
00:05:36,962 --> 00:05:38,923
It's just a foam toy.
109
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Come on!
110
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Haven't you ever wanted something so bad
you literally can't sleep?
111
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No.
112
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[angelic choir]
113
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Yes.
114
00:05:51,769 --> 00:05:55,815
OK, according to the Squishy Wooshie
company's delivery log,
115
00:05:55,898 --> 00:05:57,691
a new shipment will arrive
at the carwash
116
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first thing in the morning.
117
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And there will be four
Gnarly Narwhals in the batch.
118
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But you'll have to get to the carwash
before it opens,
119
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and how are you gonna do that?
120
00:06:07,326 --> 00:06:11,205
Hmm… Can you hack
construction businesses too?
121
00:06:16,460 --> 00:06:19,547
OK. It says to dump it right here.
122
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[reverse alert beeping]
123
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[wails]
124
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How does this keep happening?
125
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Perfect! We're the first ones here, and…
126
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[angelic choir]
127
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He took all the Gnarly Narwhals!
128
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Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
129
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For sale by… Carl Wash?
130
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He's the one selling them online
for 50 bucks!
131
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Save your quarters, everyone.
We've all been had.
132
00:06:59,670 --> 00:07:02,131
What do you mean,
you've all been had?
133
00:07:02,214 --> 00:07:06,802
Yeah, your kid must be seeing things,
cos I didn't do it.
134
00:07:06,886 --> 00:07:09,388
Yeah, my kid doesn't "see things."
135
00:07:09,471 --> 00:07:11,640
He's actually terrifyingly smart,
136
00:07:11,724 --> 00:07:14,602
and you don't even wanna know
about his sisters.
137
00:07:14,685 --> 00:07:18,355
Yeah, well, I don't have
any Squishy Narwhals in my pocket.
138
00:07:18,439 --> 00:07:19,565
See?
139
00:07:19,648 --> 00:07:23,027
Now… have a nice day.
140
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[Dad gulps]
141
00:07:26,822 --> 00:07:30,242
Who preys on innocent young kids'
collecting obsessions like that?
142
00:07:30,326 --> 00:07:33,162
OK, this guy needs to be taught a lesson.
143
00:07:33,245 --> 00:07:37,041
But that guy is huge.
It will take an army to take him down.
144
00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:41,504
Hey! Your father told me
some jerk ripped off my son.
145
00:07:41,587 --> 00:07:44,215
What do you need… from us?
146
00:07:45,174 --> 00:07:46,467
That's a good start.
147
00:07:46,550 --> 00:07:49,762
And I'll call some friends.
148
00:07:51,722 --> 00:07:54,808
[Johnny] OK, first, Mom buys
all ten Gnarly Narwhals
149
00:07:54,892 --> 00:07:57,603
and orders rush delivery
from Carl Wash…
150
00:07:58,521 --> 00:08:00,648
which you can return
and get your money back
151
00:08:00,731 --> 00:08:02,107
if the plan fails.
152
00:08:03,734 --> 00:08:05,903
-[slurps]
-[computer dings]
153
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,154
Jackpot.
154
00:08:07,238 --> 00:08:10,199
[Johnny] Then the mean and greedy man
packs them all up for shipping,
155
00:08:10,282 --> 00:08:11,784
cos he's mean and greedy…
156
00:08:15,704 --> 00:08:17,915
The bird has left the nest.
157
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:22,127
[Johnny] Next we track his route
and create a little extra stop…
158
00:08:22,211 --> 00:08:24,964
[tracker beeps]
159
00:08:25,047 --> 00:08:28,968
OK, he's heading to the post office
on Maple Street.
160
00:08:29,051 --> 00:08:31,971
Which is now a very hazardous street.
161
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[phone beeps]
162
00:08:38,644 --> 00:08:40,521
[horn blares]
163
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Come on! I got a rush delivery!
164
00:08:42,940 --> 00:08:44,692
[horn blares]
165
00:08:44,775 --> 00:08:48,279
[Johnny] And that's when his dirty trick
starts getting dirty.
166
00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:52,783
It says drop it right… now!
167
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,453
[bicycle brakes squeak]
168
00:08:56,537 --> 00:08:59,665
[Johnny] Then I make the switch
with our mole…
169
00:09:00,666 --> 00:09:02,835
You owe me for this, Test.
170
00:09:02,918 --> 00:09:05,004
Uh-huh, yeah. Now, start digging.
171
00:09:09,967 --> 00:09:13,012
[yells] My clean car! What do I do?
172
00:09:17,308 --> 00:09:21,228
[Johnny] And lastly, a little taste
of the pain he caused kids.
173
00:09:24,523 --> 00:09:25,441
[tweeting]
174
00:09:25,524 --> 00:09:28,694
-[barks]
-You gotta be kidding me.
175
00:09:28,777 --> 00:09:29,695
[splat]
176
00:09:29,778 --> 00:09:32,990
The birds have made a mess. [chuckles]
177
00:09:34,158 --> 00:09:35,659
Hello, and stop right there.
178
00:09:35,743 --> 00:09:38,078
I'm Mr. White and this is Mr. Black.
179
00:09:38,162 --> 00:09:40,164
We work for the government.
180
00:09:42,791 --> 00:09:46,670
There's been reports of mail fraud,
people selling things online,
181
00:09:46,754 --> 00:09:48,672
but sending them something different.
182
00:09:48,756 --> 00:09:50,132
Not me.
183
00:09:50,215 --> 00:09:54,219
I'm just sending out a bunch
of Squishy Narwhals I sold online.
184
00:09:54,303 --> 00:09:56,680
They're rare, and I packed them myself.
185
00:09:58,766 --> 00:10:00,768
Are you sure you're not…
186
00:10:00,851 --> 00:10:02,770
seeing things?
187
00:10:03,562 --> 00:10:04,938
♪ J-J-J-J-Johnny ♪
188
00:10:06,273 --> 00:10:07,650
Oh, no.
189
00:10:07,733 --> 00:10:09,777
Yeah, you're gonna have to come with us.
190
00:10:10,361 --> 00:10:14,782
No, no, come on, it was a mistake!
There's a kid…! Naah!
191
00:10:14,865 --> 00:10:17,576
[Johnny and sisters]
Who wants a Gnarly Narwhal?
192
00:10:17,660 --> 00:10:19,953
[kids] Me, me, me! I want it! I want it!
193
00:10:22,539 --> 00:10:23,457
I love this!
194
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:26,085
[kids cheer and laugh]
195
00:10:26,168 --> 00:10:28,295
We are really good parents.
196
00:10:28,379 --> 00:10:29,588
And crazy.
197
00:10:29,672 --> 00:10:33,676
-We're good and crazy parents.
-Isn't that the best kind?
198
00:10:33,759 --> 00:10:37,805
Yes! My Squishy Wooshie collection
is complete.
199
00:10:38,389 --> 00:10:42,643
Which means we can all go home
and forget this car wash and…
200
00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:48,023
[Johnny] "Li'l Monster Racers.
201
00:10:48,107 --> 00:10:50,651
Collect all ten…?"
202
00:10:50,734 --> 00:10:52,111
[angelic choir]
203
00:10:52,194 --> 00:10:53,320
Oh, no.
204
00:10:53,404 --> 00:10:56,740
But I need them!
They're monsters! With wheels!
205
00:10:56,824 --> 00:11:00,160
I need them! I need them!
206
00:11:00,744 --> 00:11:02,746
[theme song playing]
207
00:11:03,372 --> 00:11:04,832
♪ J-J-J-J-Johnny ♪
208
00:11:06,458 --> 00:11:07,710
♪ J-J-J-J-Johnny ♪
209
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:23,100
♪ J-J-J-J-Johnny ♪
210
00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:24,685
♪ Test! ♪