1 00:00:06,049 --> 00:00:09,427 ‎NETFLIX 原创剧集 2 00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:14,474 ‎如果你的爱人身上有个你讨厌的纹身 ‎那该怎么办? 3 00:00:14,557 --> 00:00:16,601 ‎把他们带来这里 我们把它遮起来 4 00:00:22,857 --> 00:00:27,862 ‎每个悲剧性的纹身 ‎背后都有一个荒谬的故事 5 00:00:27,945 --> 00:00:28,988 ‎布雷克跟人打赌输了 6 00:00:29,072 --> 00:00:30,490 ‎我14岁那年刺的 7 00:00:30,573 --> 00:00:33,159 ‎当时我到朋友家做客 ‎他家里刚好有个纹身枪 8 00:00:33,242 --> 00:00:34,952 ‎我觉得我当时是在热恋中 9 00:00:35,787 --> 00:00:40,583 ‎幸好纹身界五个最出色的纹身大师 10 00:00:40,666 --> 00:00:42,794 ‎在旁摩拳擦掌 准备给他们来个… 11 00:00:43,503 --> 00:00:45,129 ‎纹身大改造! 12 00:00:45,213 --> 00:00:48,633 ‎说真的 我不知道你背后的旧纹身 ‎究竟是什么玩意 13 00:00:48,716 --> 00:00:53,137 ‎但这些人显然无法对自己的皮肤 ‎做出最正确的抉择 14 00:00:54,305 --> 00:00:59,060 ‎所以带他们来的人将为他们决定 ‎用哪个图案来改造旧的纹身 15 00:01:01,104 --> 00:01:02,522 ‎天啊 不会吧? 16 00:01:02,605 --> 00:01:04,856 ‎你最好不要搞砸了 17 00:01:04,940 --> 00:01:07,026 ‎欢迎来到你人生中最美好的一天 18 00:01:07,110 --> 00:01:09,195 ‎请手下留情 19 00:01:09,278 --> 00:01:12,615 ‎他们会喜欢?还是会讨厌? ‎赶紧拉奶奶一起看 准备一些爆米花 20 00:01:12,698 --> 00:01:14,283 ‎我们一起揭晓吧 21 00:01:20,123 --> 00:01:22,625 ‎各位 我必须先好好道歉 22 00:01:22,708 --> 00:01:25,628 ‎因为你们即将看到一些 ‎有失体统的纹身 23 00:01:25,711 --> 00:01:28,506 ‎跟你们闹着玩的 ‎你们一定会爱上的 傻逼 24 00:01:29,423 --> 00:01:32,301 ‎让我们再把一个糟糕的纹身变不见吧 25 00:01:32,385 --> 00:01:34,804 ‎这回轮到崔弟斯帕克斯出场 26 00:01:34,887 --> 00:01:37,849 ‎论纹身 没什么是崔弟做不到的 27 00:01:37,932 --> 00:01:39,433 ‎他就像纹身界的忍者 28 00:01:39,517 --> 00:01:42,353 ‎我们永远猜不到 ‎他会给你变出什么纹身图 29 00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:45,523 ‎但成品肯定令你感到不可思议 30 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:47,775 ‎我通常希望每个客户能放松下来 31 00:01:47,859 --> 00:01:50,820 ‎客户越放松 就越好玩 ‎对方的个性也更贴近自己 32 00:01:50,903 --> 00:01:53,739 ‎如此一来 纹身师也能更准确地 ‎将纹身图诠释在他们身上 33 00:01:53,823 --> 00:01:56,701 ‎单单看到你的笑容 ‎我就感到很放松了 34 00:01:57,451 --> 00:02:00,997 ‎我真心希望这一对情侣也能感到轻松 35 00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:03,666 ‎到底怎么回事?纹身出了什么事? 36 00:02:03,749 --> 00:02:05,168 ‎是我的纹身 37 00:02:05,251 --> 00:02:08,795 ‎有一段歌词我非常喜欢 ‎当时我刚好在学习其他语言 38 00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:12,216 ‎我发现印地文 ‎是至今还通用的古老语言 39 00:02:12,300 --> 00:02:15,011 ‎于是我心想:“非常合适” 40 00:02:15,094 --> 00:02:18,097 ‎于是我把那段英文歌词输入谷歌翻译 41 00:02:18,181 --> 00:02:19,807 ‎结果是什么 我就刺在身上 42 00:02:19,891 --> 00:02:22,602 ‎-你用谷歌翻译决定刺青文字? ‎-是啊 43 00:02:22,685 --> 00:02:25,771 ‎当时我心想: ‎“谷歌翻译怎么可能出错?” 44 00:02:25,855 --> 00:02:29,275 ‎我离开纹身店后 拍了一张照片 45 00:02:29,358 --> 00:02:33,487 ‎对照参考文字 ‎结果发现:“这个纹身出错了 46 00:02:33,571 --> 00:02:36,699 ‎前后顺序搞错 文字上下颠倒” 47 00:02:36,782 --> 00:02:38,993 ‎-介意让我们瞧瞧吗? ‎-没问题 48 00:02:39,076 --> 00:02:41,871 ‎-这是印地文吗? ‎-纹身在我大腿上 49 00:02:43,206 --> 00:02:46,626 ‎看起来像一条神秘的火车轨道 50 00:02:46,709 --> 00:02:50,796 ‎通往仙女座星系 通往另一个星系 51 00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:53,174 ‎那个星系有个存在生命体的星球 52 00:02:53,257 --> 00:02:56,469 ‎如果你在某个地方 例如在烤肉架旁 53 00:02:56,552 --> 00:02:59,305 ‎有个男人跑来跟你说: ‎“这个纹身有问题” 我会很惊讶 54 00:02:59,388 --> 00:03:01,724 ‎-对啊 ‎-她再也不爱去泳池玩了 55 00:03:01,807 --> 00:03:05,186 ‎她会说:“万一有人看到这个纹身 ‎意识到有问题 那该怎么办?” 56 00:03:05,269 --> 00:03:09,523 ‎我曾在某个地方碰过 ‎看懂另一个印地纹身的人 57 00:03:09,607 --> 00:03:10,942 ‎你有两个印地文纹身? 58 00:03:11,025 --> 00:03:13,152 ‎-有一个是对的 ‎-其中一个是对的 59 00:03:14,403 --> 00:03:19,825 ‎希望改造后的新纹身 ‎能改变安雅的人生 让她变得更自信 60 00:03:19,909 --> 00:03:22,870 ‎希望这个纹身 ‎能为她掀开人生的新篇章 61 00:03:22,954 --> 00:03:25,581 ‎我为你们感到非常开心 毕竟我认为 62 00:03:25,665 --> 00:03:27,959 ‎-你值得来个大转变 ‎-谢谢 63 00:03:28,042 --> 00:03:30,378 ‎改造旧纹身需要很大的决心 64 00:03:30,461 --> 00:03:33,631 ‎-只是交由崔弟操刀 你们不会有事的 ‎-我准备好了 65 00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:36,634 ‎但最精彩的部分是 ‎新纹身由不得你决定 66 00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:37,843 ‎决定权在她手上 67 00:03:41,347 --> 00:03:42,807 ‎-真的吗? ‎-她很紧张 68 00:03:42,890 --> 00:03:44,725 ‎-我知道她有什么感受 ‎-我非常紧张 69 00:03:44,809 --> 00:03:48,771 ‎某些方面我们品味一致 ‎但也有某些方面我们品味完全相反 70 00:03:48,854 --> 00:03:49,772 ‎我很期待 71 00:03:49,855 --> 00:03:53,276 ‎她绝对不会让我为她挑选纹身图的 72 00:03:53,359 --> 00:03:55,027 ‎我不喜欢完全失去掌控权的感觉 73 00:03:55,111 --> 00:03:56,988 ‎搞得我肠胃不适了 74 00:03:57,071 --> 00:03:58,781 ‎一定会很意思的 75 00:03:59,949 --> 00:04:01,909 ‎阿什琳 劝你选出好看的纹身图 76 00:04:01,993 --> 00:04:03,828 ‎不然你的女朋友会吐在你身上 77 00:04:03,911 --> 00:04:05,621 ‎你觉得她适合什么图像? 78 00:04:05,705 --> 00:04:09,250 ‎日式龙纹身 她喜欢充满寓意的图像 79 00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:11,961 ‎我知道日式龙带有平衡和自由的寓意 80 00:04:12,044 --> 00:04:13,587 ‎-厉害 ‎-龙纹身很牛逼 81 00:04:13,671 --> 00:04:15,214 ‎龙这个想法不错 82 00:04:15,298 --> 00:04:16,215 ‎那就好 83 00:04:16,298 --> 00:04:17,841 ‎她是个褐色皮肤的女性 84 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:21,137 ‎旧纹身太小了 ‎看起来就像爬在她大腿上的蚂蚁 85 00:04:21,220 --> 00:04:22,888 ‎一般上 肤色越暗 86 00:04:22,972 --> 00:04:25,057 ‎纹身图就要显得越大 ‎才能看出个所以然来 87 00:04:25,141 --> 00:04:27,143 ‎我想到了这个图像 88 00:04:28,102 --> 00:04:29,478 ‎太好看了 89 00:04:29,562 --> 00:04:32,565 ‎我希望路人看到这个纹身 90 00:04:32,648 --> 00:04:35,026 ‎不假思索就看出那是一条龙 91 00:04:35,109 --> 00:04:37,820 ‎我要路人从对街看到就赞好 92 00:04:37,903 --> 00:04:39,363 ‎将旧纹身彻底去除 93 00:04:39,447 --> 00:04:40,740 ‎就像它从没存在过一样 94 00:04:40,823 --> 00:04:42,992 ‎-说得太对了 ‎-就像浴火重生一样 95 00:04:43,075 --> 00:04:43,909 ‎好的 96 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:47,538 ‎但她会喜欢吗? 97 00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:51,292 ‎问题是 这个女客户非常紧张 98 00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:52,960 ‎天啊 99 00:04:53,044 --> 00:04:56,005 ‎这个新纹身看起来不小哦 100 00:04:56,088 --> 00:04:59,675 ‎我要确保她到最后才看到纹身图 101 00:04:59,759 --> 00:05:01,427 ‎-这就是你的未来 ‎-对啊 102 00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:03,512 ‎我正在往这个地方走去 ‎迎向最美好的人生 103 00:05:03,596 --> 00:05:07,058 ‎-前往这个地方 过着最美好的生活 ‎-我的臀部不用再藏起来了 104 00:05:08,517 --> 00:05:12,521 ‎美女们 尽情释放吧 崔弟 动手吧 105 00:05:12,605 --> 00:05:14,774 ‎-我感觉到魔咒的力量了 ‎-开始了 106 00:05:14,857 --> 00:05:16,275 ‎亲爱的 开始了 107 00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:19,236 ‎完全不疼吧? 108 00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:20,279 ‎其实还好 109 00:05:20,363 --> 00:05:23,532 ‎对 就像在好时巧克力上纹身 110 00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:27,161 ‎我尽可能在线条里放更多的糖 111 00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:30,498 ‎崔弟 没有人会介意糖放太多 112 00:05:31,332 --> 00:05:35,086 ‎轮到最甜美的米莉安仑披尼出场了 113 00:05:35,169 --> 00:05:37,004 ‎她的作品充满爱和光 114 00:05:37,088 --> 00:05:40,091 ‎看到她的纹身作品 ‎你就懂我的意思了 115 00:05:40,174 --> 00:05:42,468 ‎色彩斑斓鲜艳 116 00:05:42,551 --> 00:05:44,053 ‎我热爱改造纹身 117 00:05:44,136 --> 00:05:48,391 ‎我能改造他人不满的纹身 118 00:05:48,474 --> 00:05:51,894 ‎如果有人问:“还有其他办法吗? ‎我这一生就这样毁掉了吗?” 119 00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:54,397 ‎我听了会说: ‎“别说了 交给我处理吧” 120 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:56,273 ‎说真的 米莉安 121 00:05:56,357 --> 00:05:59,402 ‎接下来出场的女孩 ‎她的人生搞不好已经毁了 122 00:05:59,485 --> 00:06:03,072 ‎你俩是怎么认识的?当朋友多久了? 123 00:06:03,155 --> 00:06:05,157 ‎我们结识两年半了 124 00:06:05,241 --> 00:06:06,575 ‎两年半 没错 125 00:06:06,659 --> 00:06:08,828 ‎我是个不折不扣的乖宝宝 126 00:06:08,911 --> 00:06:12,206 ‎而米歇尔时不时会做出错误的决定 127 00:06:12,289 --> 00:06:13,124 ‎(青春叛逆) 128 00:06:13,207 --> 00:06:16,168 ‎这都是受到我随性的个性驱使 129 00:06:16,252 --> 00:06:18,462 ‎“常做错误的决定”只是另一种说法 130 00:06:19,755 --> 00:06:23,342 ‎我腿上有个难看的纹身 131 00:06:23,426 --> 00:06:24,677 ‎直接让我们看了 132 00:06:29,265 --> 00:06:32,101 ‎这是什么?一片披萨吗? 133 00:06:32,184 --> 00:06:34,103 ‎我腿上有两个裸女 134 00:06:34,186 --> 00:06:36,772 ‎那个男人看起来像是 ‎想要摆脱这个纹身 135 00:06:36,856 --> 00:06:38,232 ‎那是膝盖还是睾丸? 136 00:06:38,315 --> 00:06:41,152 ‎上面有两双膝盖和乳房 137 00:06:41,235 --> 00:06:42,528 ‎亲爱的 到底怎么回事? 138 00:06:42,611 --> 00:06:46,574 ‎我表哥的女朋友 ‎有支用来把玩的纹身枪 139 00:06:46,657 --> 00:06:48,784 ‎我说:“你大可在我身上刺青 ‎我不介意” 140 00:06:48,868 --> 00:06:51,036 ‎别说了 ‎千万别叫表哥的女朋友给你刺青 141 00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:52,955 ‎你们都对她太好了 142 00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:57,126 ‎起初只有一个纹身 就是红色的那个 143 00:06:57,209 --> 00:07:01,464 ‎我用了几个月设法去爱上这个纹身 ‎结果失败 144 00:07:01,547 --> 00:07:05,301 ‎于是我的男朋友弄来了 ‎一组完整的纹身工具 他对我说 145 00:07:05,384 --> 00:07:08,304 ‎“我看看能不能帮你修好 ‎把旧纹身遮盖起来” 146 00:07:08,387 --> 00:07:11,223 ‎当时你怎么没出面阻止呢? 147 00:07:11,307 --> 00:07:13,350 ‎我还没出现在她的生命中 ‎当时还不是闺蜜 148 00:07:13,434 --> 00:07:14,643 ‎-梅丽莎 ‎-自从我出现后 149 00:07:14,727 --> 00:07:16,854 ‎帮她做了不少有益的决定 150 00:07:18,189 --> 00:07:20,149 ‎我很期待改造你个旧纹身 151 00:07:20,232 --> 00:07:22,234 ‎-你期待吗? ‎-非常期待 152 00:07:22,818 --> 00:07:26,238 ‎最精彩的是 新纹身由不得你决定 153 00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:29,074 ‎-由梅丽莎决定 ‎-不会吧? 154 00:07:30,075 --> 00:07:32,036 ‎她将决定你的新纹身图 155 00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:34,997 ‎-天啊 ‎-好啊 156 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:36,665 ‎好吧 157 00:07:36,749 --> 00:07:38,334 ‎我感觉你有点犹豫不决 158 00:07:38,417 --> 00:07:40,127 ‎-你知道吗? ‎-你信得过我吗? 159 00:07:40,211 --> 00:07:43,839 ‎我相信你的判断 ‎我觉得她十分理解我喜欢的风格 160 00:07:43,923 --> 00:07:46,342 ‎她是再合适不过的人选了 161 00:07:46,425 --> 00:07:48,260 ‎-天啊 ‎-我真的… 162 00:07:48,344 --> 00:07:50,262 ‎-我已经热泪盈眶了 ‎-可不是吗? 163 00:07:50,346 --> 00:07:52,598 ‎别太感动了 ‎她有时也会做出差劲的决定 164 00:07:52,681 --> 00:07:54,058 ‎我恨死她了 165 00:07:54,141 --> 00:07:56,560 ‎-现在别说这种话 ‎-现在说这种话非常不合适 166 00:07:56,644 --> 00:07:57,978 ‎咨询过后再说也不迟 167 00:07:58,062 --> 00:08:01,106 ‎我想讲一下 ‎你做错决定不是一次的事 168 00:08:01,190 --> 00:08:03,067 ‎而是整整两次 169 00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:05,152 ‎一次纹身失败 是我不对 170 00:08:05,236 --> 00:08:09,365 ‎-两次纹身失败 还是我不对 ‎-两次纹身失败 还是你不对 171 00:08:11,492 --> 00:08:14,912 ‎梅丽莎 加把劲 ‎一起来打破这个耻辱的循环吧 172 00:08:14,995 --> 00:08:16,205 ‎挑个好看的纹身图 173 00:08:16,288 --> 00:08:20,668 ‎-我觉得她适合较为简单的纹身图 ‎-对 我也有同感 174 00:08:20,751 --> 00:08:24,129 ‎我马上就能感受到玫瑰的氛围 175 00:08:24,213 --> 00:08:27,758 ‎我心想给她刺一朵 ‎被叶子簇拥着的玫瑰 176 00:08:27,841 --> 00:08:30,886 ‎让整个纹身将她的膝盖包裹起来 177 00:08:30,970 --> 00:08:35,140 ‎我担心纹身拉长到膝盖以下 ‎会显得太大 178 00:08:35,224 --> 00:08:37,308 ‎我不知道她会不会因此感到慌张 179 00:08:37,393 --> 00:08:40,813 ‎我认为膝盖纹身很有个性 180 00:08:40,895 --> 00:08:42,731 ‎-我认为这种纹身很硬朗 ‎-是 181 00:08:42,815 --> 00:08:44,525 ‎看起来很有个性 既干净又时髦 182 00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:50,990 ‎我觉得这个纹身最大的难度是 ‎新纹身要达到她理想的大小 183 00:08:51,073 --> 00:08:52,908 ‎但这个新纹身的确不小 184 00:08:52,992 --> 00:08:56,328 ‎我必须在位置上多下工夫 185 00:08:56,412 --> 00:08:58,914 ‎这个纹身会刺在她的大腿上 186 00:08:58,998 --> 00:09:03,252 ‎我打算用红色线条勾勒出 ‎这朵玫瑰的轮廓 187 00:09:03,335 --> 00:09:09,049 ‎然后徒手画出黑色的叶子 ‎遮住后面黑色线条的男人 188 00:09:09,133 --> 00:09:12,011 ‎是彩色的吗? ‎我知道她不喜欢鲜艳的颜色 189 00:09:12,094 --> 00:09:16,974 ‎我们大可用黑色来勾勒这朵玫瑰 ‎用红色来点亮 190 00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:19,268 ‎-好啊 ‎-这也非常好看 191 00:09:19,351 --> 00:09:21,770 ‎我会用很深的红色 192 00:09:21,854 --> 00:09:22,688 ‎好的 193 00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:26,233 ‎-颜色越暗越好 ‎-好的 交给我去办 194 00:09:26,317 --> 00:09:28,027 ‎我相信你 195 00:09:28,110 --> 00:09:31,405 ‎-毕竟你是纹身师 ‎-太好了 我们开始吧 196 00:09:32,990 --> 00:09:36,076 ‎梅丽莎信任米莉安 这是好事 197 00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:39,872 ‎但我信不过米歇尔 ‎我要确保她看不到这个纹身 198 00:09:39,955 --> 00:09:41,665 ‎是一座断头台 199 00:09:41,749 --> 00:09:42,750 ‎是啊 200 00:09:42,833 --> 00:09:45,419 ‎这是要确保你看不到纹身过程 201 00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:47,796 ‎-没想到吧? ‎-说真的 这时我应该感到惊讶吗? 202 00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:50,716 ‎-我说不上来 ‎-米歇尔 203 00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:53,385 ‎我们还给你准备了另一个惊喜 204 00:09:53,469 --> 00:09:56,805 ‎在膝盖上纹身会很疼 205 00:09:56,889 --> 00:09:59,600 ‎这个部位挺疼的 206 00:10:00,559 --> 00:10:03,771 ‎这个部位涵盖好几个程度不同的痛点 207 00:10:03,854 --> 00:10:07,441 ‎-待会儿你就体会到了 ‎-这是一个不错的小区快 208 00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:13,906 ‎-你觉得是什么? ‎-一头大象 209 00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:18,077 ‎-你觉得是一头大象? ‎-我循着线条去想象 210 00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:22,665 ‎你企图在脑海中描绘出我刺的纹身? 211 00:10:22,748 --> 00:10:26,210 ‎是啊 可是我总是分心 212 00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:28,921 ‎真是难以置信 ‎我竟然放弃这么大的自主权 213 00:10:29,004 --> 00:10:34,009 ‎我感觉就像坐上云霄飞车 ‎身上却没系安全带 214 00:10:34,093 --> 00:10:37,388 ‎天啊 这跟生孩子的痛有什么分别? 215 00:10:37,471 --> 00:10:39,890 ‎记得要呼吸 这就对了 216 00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:47,815 ‎她在看着你痛苦的表情 217 00:10:47,898 --> 00:10:50,484 ‎是吗?我连脚趾头也感觉到痛 218 00:10:50,567 --> 00:10:52,486 ‎我的脚趾头在抽动 219 00:10:52,569 --> 00:10:55,989 ‎米歇尔说过很多次 ‎她不喜欢鲜艳的颜色 220 00:10:56,073 --> 00:10:58,242 ‎米莉安则采用红色 221 00:10:58,325 --> 00:10:59,535 ‎也就是一种鲜艳的颜色 222 00:10:59,618 --> 00:11:01,620 ‎我看了感觉很紧张 223 00:11:01,704 --> 00:11:03,372 ‎但我就是无法把视线移开 224 00:11:03,455 --> 00:11:07,126 ‎说真的 我开始有点担心 ‎米歇尔不会喜欢这个新纹身 225 00:11:10,254 --> 00:11:12,631 ‎好了 应该搞定了 226 00:11:15,676 --> 00:11:18,137 ‎米莉安 你真粗鲁 ‎她承受的痛还不够吗? 227 00:11:18,220 --> 00:11:21,932 ‎你知道还有什么更失礼吗? ‎米歇尔不喜欢鲜艳的颜色 228 00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:25,018 ‎如今她腿上多了一个红色的大纹身 229 00:11:25,102 --> 00:11:27,730 ‎希望她会喜欢 230 00:11:32,067 --> 00:11:34,361 ‎-美女 关键时刻到了 ‎-我有点抖 231 00:11:34,445 --> 00:11:35,696 ‎我们对你毫不留情 232 00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:38,323 ‎她下手真狠 233 00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:43,036 ‎我要你用手蒙住眼睛 234 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:45,664 ‎-不准看我拆下胶带的过程 ‎-好的 235 00:11:46,582 --> 00:11:50,169 ‎再拆掉几片胶带 ‎你就会迎来人生的重大时刻 236 00:11:50,836 --> 00:11:51,670 ‎我很紧张 237 00:11:51,754 --> 00:11:53,589 ‎-我们就快知道… ‎-我真的很紧张 238 00:11:53,672 --> 00:11:56,091 ‎…你的人生究竟怎么了 239 00:11:56,175 --> 00:11:59,678 ‎我们是不是要准备铲子挖坟了? 240 00:12:00,429 --> 00:12:01,722 ‎希望没这个必要 241 00:12:01,805 --> 00:12:03,557 ‎你两只膝盖都在发抖呢 242 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,809 ‎我已经准备好为她揭晓新纹身了 243 00:12:05,893 --> 00:12:09,354 ‎只要知道她喜欢 ‎我的紧张感就消失了 244 00:12:09,438 --> 00:12:11,148 ‎这显然是最好的结果 245 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:12,441 ‎最糟糕的结果是… 246 00:12:12,524 --> 00:12:14,276 ‎-送上真正的断头台 ‎-没错 247 00:12:14,359 --> 00:12:15,277 ‎你是指断头“坟”吧 248 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,613 ‎对 断头“坟” 249 00:12:18,822 --> 00:12:20,866 ‎好了 从三开始倒数 250 00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:23,160 ‎把手拿开 拥抱全新的自己吧 251 00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:26,580 ‎好了 梅丽莎 轮到你发光了 252 00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:30,751 ‎好的 三、二… 253 00:12:31,543 --> 00:12:33,170 ‎-一! ‎-一! 254 00:12:36,590 --> 00:12:39,468 ‎天啊 255 00:12:40,552 --> 00:12:43,013 ‎这句“天啊”是褒还是贬? 256 00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:44,932 ‎你怎么想? 257 00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:50,979 ‎你要哭了吗? 258 00:12:51,063 --> 00:12:52,397 ‎你有什么感想? 259 00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:55,901 ‎-我非常喜欢 ‎-太好了 260 00:12:56,902 --> 00:12:57,736 ‎她非常喜欢! 261 00:12:59,863 --> 00:13:02,157 ‎我担心你哭是因为悲从中来 262 00:13:02,241 --> 00:13:04,409 ‎原来是喜极而泣 我可以喘口气了 263 00:13:05,577 --> 00:13:07,162 ‎旧纹身不见了 264 00:13:07,246 --> 00:13:08,330 ‎完全不见了 265 00:13:08,413 --> 00:13:09,998 ‎-真不可思议 ‎-完全不见了 266 00:13:10,082 --> 00:13:12,626 ‎那个设法逃离你的怪男人 ‎跑哪里去了? 267 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:14,044 ‎这也太棒了 268 00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:16,505 ‎她是最了解我的人 269 00:13:16,588 --> 00:13:20,634 ‎-她能挑出一个非常适合我的纹身 ‎-米歇尔 270 00:13:20,717 --> 00:13:22,719 ‎-谢谢 ‎-我又要哭了 271 00:13:22,803 --> 00:13:26,473 ‎-合作造就杰作 ‎-你要哭了吗?该哭的人是我吧 272 00:13:26,557 --> 00:13:31,728 ‎这是充满喜悦和爱的眼泪 ‎这是我最幸福的一刻 273 00:13:31,812 --> 00:13:32,980 ‎很高兴你喜欢 274 00:13:33,063 --> 00:13:35,023 ‎-我也很高兴我会喜欢 ‎-是啊 275 00:13:35,107 --> 00:13:36,066 ‎为了你 276 00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:39,194 ‎我刚才很害怕 277 00:13:39,278 --> 00:13:41,238 ‎-我很担心自己 ‎-我很担心你 278 00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:43,073 ‎毕竟我刚才不知道你喜不喜欢 279 00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:46,159 ‎我可以把我的室友申请 ‎从克雷格列表上取下来了 280 00:13:46,243 --> 00:13:47,077 ‎好的 281 00:13:54,960 --> 00:13:56,378 ‎好了 美女 大功告成 282 00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:58,797 ‎-搞定 ‎-我很期待看到新纹身 283 00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:00,799 ‎-可不是吗? ‎-好了 284 00:14:01,758 --> 00:14:03,218 ‎你看起来没我那么期待 285 00:14:03,302 --> 00:14:05,721 ‎-我很紧张 希望我会喜欢 ‎-一定会很好看的 286 00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:12,561 ‎安雅看起来非常紧张 ‎她十分信任女友 287 00:14:12,644 --> 00:14:13,562 ‎我有信心 288 00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:17,441 ‎我相信阿什琳会选出她喜欢的纹身图 289 00:14:18,442 --> 00:14:20,110 ‎我尽可能对她有信心 290 00:14:21,904 --> 00:14:23,864 ‎安雅 在我揭晓这个新纹身之前 291 00:14:23,947 --> 00:14:26,867 ‎你一定要答应我 要永远爱这个女人 292 00:14:26,950 --> 00:14:28,827 ‎因为她给你挑了一个非常好看的纹身 293 00:14:28,911 --> 00:14:30,162 ‎非常好看 294 00:14:30,245 --> 00:14:32,039 ‎我很紧张 非常紧张 295 00:14:32,122 --> 00:14:36,001 ‎很好 来吧 你等这个新纹身等了六年 296 00:14:36,084 --> 00:14:39,004 ‎天啊 297 00:14:39,087 --> 00:14:43,175 ‎别扭腰摆臀 ‎今晚再扭腰摆臀也不迟 好了 298 00:14:43,258 --> 00:14:44,176 ‎行了 299 00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:47,346 ‎等一下 我看不见 300 00:14:48,430 --> 00:14:51,850 ‎我的天啊 是一条龙 301 00:14:51,934 --> 00:14:53,685 ‎-是一条龙 ‎-天啊 302 00:14:54,186 --> 00:14:57,522 ‎什么?这条龙竟然在我身上? 303 00:14:57,606 --> 00:14:59,066 ‎什么?你做到了 304 00:14:59,149 --> 00:15:02,444 ‎-这才像话嘛 大姐 ‎-天啊 这条龙太好看了 305 00:15:02,527 --> 00:15:05,530 ‎你比我更了解我自己 ‎这个新纹身就证明了这点 306 00:15:05,614 --> 00:15:06,740 ‎是一条龙 307 00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:07,950 ‎是一条龙 308 00:15:10,577 --> 00:15:12,079 ‎不要紧的 309 00:15:12,162 --> 00:15:13,121 ‎谢谢你 310 00:15:15,624 --> 00:15:18,043 ‎-太好了 ‎-你要把我弄哭了 311 00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:19,628 ‎太棒了 312 00:15:19,711 --> 00:15:21,380 ‎-如今你有了一个新的开始 ‎-是啊 313 00:15:21,463 --> 00:15:23,799 ‎我去海边再也不用把纹身遮起来了 314 00:15:23,882 --> 00:15:25,968 ‎-有人走过 我就拉起裙子 ‎-很好 315 00:15:26,051 --> 00:15:27,469 ‎我等不及了 316 00:15:28,762 --> 00:15:31,181 ‎要我走前去吗?还是你走过来? 317 00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:34,393 ‎美女 来个新的步态! 318 00:15:34,476 --> 00:15:37,479 ‎我感觉自己像个新造的女人 319 00:15:37,562 --> 00:15:39,064 ‎天啊 320 00:15:39,147 --> 00:15:41,483 ‎-可不是吗?是一条龙 ‎-美女 321 00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:44,361 ‎你就是这条龙 322 00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:45,779 ‎过去已经过去了 323 00:15:45,862 --> 00:15:47,906 ‎我没想到会有这种感受 324 00:15:47,990 --> 00:15:51,076 ‎我感觉肩上的重担消失了 325 00:15:51,702 --> 00:15:53,745 ‎-要跳舞了 ‎-是啊 326 00:15:55,038 --> 00:15:58,083 ‎我们要学习她的新步态 ‎我喜欢她的新步态 327 00:15:59,376 --> 00:16:00,794 ‎各位 我们成功了! 328 00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:05,340 ‎带着糟糕的纹身进来 ‎带着出彩的纹身离开 329 00:16:05,424 --> 00:16:10,429 ‎我们简直就是在施法嘛 ‎这个过程挺精彩的吧? 330 00:16:11,096 --> 00:16:15,058 ‎看来只有一件事还没做了 331 00:16:15,142 --> 00:16:17,769 ‎轮到我了 332 00:16:17,853 --> 00:16:19,938 ‎-我要把手穿过去 ‎-穿过去 333 00:16:20,022 --> 00:16:22,858 ‎-谁来解释一下规则? ‎-没有规则 334 00:16:22,941 --> 00:16:25,318 ‎-没有规则 ‎-这是我们的地盘 335 00:16:25,402 --> 00:16:28,155 ‎-穿过去吧 ‎-你马上就要开始了吗? 336 00:16:28,238 --> 00:16:31,116 ‎-萝丝 不打算说些什么吗? ‎-别乱动 好吗? 337 00:16:32,284 --> 00:16:33,243 ‎我们要开始了 338 00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:35,662 ‎害怕了吧? ‎如今知道客户的感受了吗? 339 00:16:35,746 --> 00:16:37,080 ‎知道了 340 00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:39,458 ‎等一下 我想问你一件事 ‎你不想要什么? 341 00:16:39,541 --> 00:16:42,085 ‎马特 你今天的话特别多 342 00:16:42,169 --> 00:16:45,130 ‎-我有点希望你变回话少的那个人 ‎-给她纹身难吗? 343 00:16:45,213 --> 00:16:48,675 ‎-很难 她总是乱动 ‎-他们在那边开派对 344 00:16:48,759 --> 00:16:50,135 ‎可以帮我骂一下她吗? 345 00:16:50,218 --> 00:16:52,637 ‎-别乱动 你真是个难搞的客户 ‎-那就别害我乱动嘛 346 00:16:52,721 --> 00:16:55,223 ‎我感觉你很靠近我的手 347 00:16:55,849 --> 00:16:57,726 ‎别说话 348 00:17:00,312 --> 00:17:02,147 ‎-别乱动 ‎-对不起 349 00:17:03,398 --> 00:17:09,154 ‎可以不要乱动吗? ‎尽管过来 按住她 很好 350 00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:11,948 ‎这是什么部位? 351 00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:13,867 ‎我们整天下来都得按住她 352 00:17:13,949 --> 00:17:16,285 ‎-她坚持不住 ‎-她受不了这种痛 353 00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:18,537 ‎说好的忠诚呢? 354 00:17:18,622 --> 00:17:19,456 ‎大功告成 355 00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:20,707 ‎萝丝 你真粗鲁 356 00:17:20,832 --> 00:17:23,168 ‎-我粗鲁是因为你总是乱动 ‎-真粗鲁 357 00:17:23,293 --> 00:17:25,587 ‎杰西玛 你准备好了吗? 358 00:17:25,670 --> 00:17:26,630 ‎我是不是搞砸了? 359 00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:27,881 ‎-是啊 ‎-真的吗? 360 00:17:27,964 --> 00:17:30,801 ‎对啊 你总是乱动 ‎所以我才对你大声吆喝 361 00:17:30,884 --> 00:17:32,636 ‎-是吗? ‎-她没跟你闹着玩 362 00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:34,346 ‎外面手环在打折 363 00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:37,557 ‎你可以买些珠串子 或是戴上大手环 364 00:17:37,641 --> 00:17:39,017 ‎那要用新纹身把它遮住吗? 365 00:17:39,101 --> 00:17:41,186 ‎别把纸巾拿走 按住 366 00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:42,354 ‎知道了 367 00:17:43,355 --> 00:17:44,815 ‎什么时候可以看? 368 00:17:44,898 --> 00:17:45,732 ‎马上拆开来看吧 369 00:17:53,865 --> 00:17:54,783 ‎你不喜欢吗? 370 00:17:54,866 --> 00:17:58,120 ‎-图样干净 充满张力 ‎-瞧瞧这种红色 371 00:17:58,203 --> 00:17:59,287 ‎玫瑰图 372 00:17:59,371 --> 00:18:01,665 ‎-你到底喜不喜欢? ‎-天啊 373 00:18:05,168 --> 00:18:06,002 ‎宝贝 374 00:18:06,545 --> 00:18:08,964 ‎这是我见过最糟糕的纹身 375 00:18:11,883 --> 00:18:15,345 ‎-非常适合你 ‎-每个线条都刺得很好 376 00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:17,222 ‎刚才骗你的 就算你乱动 我也能刺好 377 00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:18,431 ‎-你确定吗? ‎-天啊 378 00:18:18,515 --> 00:18:19,724 ‎非常干净 379 00:18:19,808 --> 00:18:20,892 ‎太厉害了 380 00:18:20,976 --> 00:18:22,727 ‎如今你成为我们的一分子了 381 00:18:22,811 --> 00:18:26,898 ‎-你加入了一个更大的家庭 ‎-我懂 我的确有这种感受 382 00:18:26,982 --> 00:18:29,943 ‎这也太美了 真的 感激不尽 383 00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:33,196 ‎各位 疼也值了 384 00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:36,158 ‎以后就算他们想把我扫出家门 ‎也不行了 385 00:18:36,241 --> 00:18:37,993 ‎我加入了这个大家庭 386 00:18:38,076 --> 00:18:40,996 ‎还有你 电视机前的你 我指的就是你 387 00:18:41,079 --> 00:18:43,915 ‎别把自己的皮肤当成是便条本 388 00:18:43,999 --> 00:18:45,959 ‎如果真出错了 我们很乐意帮你 389 00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:48,795 ‎下回见 傻逼 390 00:19:11,443 --> 00:19:13,445 ‎字幕翻译:张庆龄